"Tell me with whom you associate, and I will tell you who you are." Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
Now I won't be speaking on the Islamophobic, antisemitism, or other accusations because I am not well versed on those. Other people are welcomed to highlight and educate the populous on those.
Up until three days ago, I was blissfully unaware of the abuse porn website Mr. Healy apparently adores and frequents. I'm horrified and not to be hyperbolic, a bit traumatized that men not only enjoy such disgusting material but are also allowed to do so publicly. This speaks volumes to me on the privilege white women have to ignore and condone such actions as throughout the last few days I've seen how many seem perplexed that his actions and comments are garnering such distain. It is frankly inhuman to ask people of colour why they are hurt that a man is LITERALLY orgasming to women being brutalized.
And if it is a joke, are we okay with a man joking about the abuse of women, especially marginalized women? Women who likely are not aware of what they are signing up for and are only doing so because they are so vulnerable that it seems like the only way to feed themselves or their children? That's funny?
As to why Miss Swift is embroiled in this unfortunate situation. Continuing to be so publicly connected with him after learning about his actions is where I'm having difficulty with the situation. The inaction denotes callous indifference. His action by watching or joking about watching women being brutalized trivializes and dehumanizes women, especially and specifically women of colour. By standing by his side either as his fling/girlfriend or as a fan defending his action you are condoning that. And it is not something I will forget.
I'm protecting myself and standing up for what I believe in. I don't care if it makes you uncomfortable. I know writing this insignificant post on tumblr won't change the world, but this is me saying that I won't be silent on situation that I think are wrong. If no one else is going to say women like me matter then I am.
I can't just post this and move on. Whether that is shifting the focus of my degree, volunteering, donating, or a mix, I can't stop thinking about the actual real life women who are being victimized in Mr. Healy's joke. So I guess that's one good thing to come out of an otherwise unpleasant experience.