#do i feel guilty? erm yes but fuck him
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rambling about Haruka
As an ND person I just hate how Haruka's character is either completely infantilized or reduced to a selfish, evil murderer, when, to me, he is so much more than that.
Especially the latter; I hate when any MILGRAM character is called evil because what's the point of MILGRAM, then? They're all morally grey! That's how they test us. But Haruka in particular because I feel like it comes from a place of ableism, intentional or not.
I'm not sure if I should put TWs, but well I talk about ableism, murder (obviously lol), childhood trauma and well... it's Haruka
Haruka's outburst in the VD and his implication of killing animals (I know it's basically canon but erm... i can explain why I think it's an implication later) (i just finished writing the post and actually i explained why at the bottom of the post but its not a full explanation so lol) are the reasons I see people calling him either evil or childlike, and while I do think that Haruka is stuck in a childlike state in some aspects, this is emotional dysregulation of an ND and/or traumatized person, to me.
The uglier sides of being ND/traumatized, the ones that get heavily stigmatized and seen as intentional or evil; I think this was a display of one of them. And I really wish to see more people focusing on Haruka's disability in the ways it can affect his communication and day-to-day life skills more than "oh, poor baby, he has a disability that makes him feel unwanted" without actually understanding the details of the disability and, well, the reason why it is a disability.
Like, the emotional dysregulation that comes with being autistic, which is my headcanon for him. The hyperempathy and literal thinking that might make him harder to communicate with, and get people frustrated with him more often.
That and being severely neglected; I think neglect is one of the lesser discussed forms of childhood trauma and the fact that Haruka was shown to be neglected as well as abuse really means a lot to me, because I think some people don't quite understand just how much neglect and isolation fucks you up.
All those factors combined are a recipe for an unstable, impulsive, clingy shell of a human, and him getting called evil for that really saddens me. It's important to remember that these MVs are extracted from the prisoners' own memories and thoughts. It comes from their perception of their surroundings, their murders, and their own selves. The manic look that Haruka has on his face for a lot of AKAA, for example. The makeshift shirt he's wearing, as if he's desperately trying to sew himself together into a normal person, the exhausted, frustrated look when he picks up the necklace, it's important to remember that this is how he sees himself. A monster who has lost control of himself. The line "I'll keep killing to be your good boy" was a shock, but the way he meekly apologized to Es at the end of his VD, I really think that shows that he feels guilty, that he wants to convince himself more than anyone that he was a good person, that he was really trying to be one despite how his unlucky life frustrated him to his breaking point.
As for his infantilization, it has already been addressed by many thoughtful members of the fandom and I'm grateful to see that, but I also want to say it myself since god knows I hate being patronized.
It feels very ableist saying he's just "someone stuck in a childlike mindset/age regressor" Yes, and how does age regression as a coping mechanism develop? Usually through prior trauma that makes you "stuck" at said age, and that can present differently. It can be longing and yearning for a simpler time, for an actual happy childhood, or having flashbacks to a traumatic event that happened at a certain age; it is not uncommon for trauma survivors to be "frozen" at the age their trauma took place.
I think both of these are the case for Haruka. Frozen at that moment, but trying to reduce himself to nothing but a little, unaware child to avoid reliving it again, relishing in the innocence and purity of his good younger times (emphasis on purity--Haruka's murder was by strangulation, yet there's a shot in AKAA where he's covered in blood. I know it's after he killed the animals, but he's in the stitched-together outfit here; I think there's more to this MV than just killing the animals. Since this outfit is... not very likely to be worn in reality, did the animal killing happen at all? Even if it did, I think this shot remains an indicator that he sees himself as impure; guilty. I have a LOT to say about the inconsistencies in Haruka's MVs, but I'll save that for later... Anyway, back on topic) It is NOT "having the mental capacity of a child, so being unable to date etc." Haruka has still lived 17 years, maybe even more, since he isn't too interested in remembering his age. How do you treat actual neurodivergent people if this is how you see him?
When I rewatch the MVs, relisten to the VDs, reread the interrogations and timelines, I see no evil, just an incredibly broken, misunderstood person.
#please excuse any inconsistencies or spelling mistakes its almost 5am ive been awake all night lmaooo#im open to discussion but pls be nice :(#im a relatively new milgram fan (got into it just when ILY MV came out—got hyperfixated oct/nov) so please inform me if I say anything wrong#i love haruka so so much aaugh#i will defend him till my last breath#milgram#sakurai haruka#milgram project#haruka sakurai#jay rambles bleh idk#should i even tag this#i feel so scared to share my thoughts on the milgram prisoners AAA i hope everything makes sense
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"You're so very tempting..." - said Aziraphale to the xmass food lined up on the countertop
notes: anon how does it feel to be the funniest fucking person in my inbox at the moment
Crowley walks into your home, warm and welcoming as usual, but this time smelling pleasantly of Christmas spice. He also walks in to the sounds of enthusiastic muttering laced with… lust?
“You’re so very tempting…”
He raises an eyebrow to himself. Perhaps he is about to catch the two of you in the act. He quite enjoys that, actually - it feels sinful. Doubly so when you get him to join in.
He opens the living room door and deflates a bit.
Aziraphale’s head whips round from where he’s staring at the spread. Oh, right. You’re holding your work’s holiday buffet this year. The tables have been manoeuvred to the cosy front room and the food is laid out perfectly: vol-au-vents; canapés; every tiny finger food someone can think of. And Aziraphale is reaching towards it.
He looks guilty.
“Oh! Crowley, I didn’t realise you’d be —”
“Home so early?” he finishes, breezily. Aziraphale retracts his hand from where it’s been comically paused in midair.
“Erm, yes. Lovely to see you my darling, I was just - ”
“Does our nightingale know you’re descending upon their hard work?”
Aziraphale tries to look offended. But mostly he looks like he’s been caught doing something he ought not to.
“I just wanted one little crudité. One wouldn’t be missed…”
“Aziraphale. There is a sign.”
It’s true. You’ve left a large piece of paper blu-tacked above the table: AZIRAPHALE, DO NOT TOUCH.
The angel sighs, utterly rumbled.
“Oh alright. Just please… don’t dob me in?” he begs. Crowley hums thoughtfully.
“Maybe you can convince me to keep quiet.”
Aziraphale gapes.
“Are you blackmailing me?”
“That’s a bit of a serious way to put it.”
“You’re my husband, Crowley!”
“Yes, so the ways of convincing I have in mind you’ll probably enjoy.”
Aziraphale shuts his mouth, thinks it over, and then lets Crowley have his wicked way.
And when you get back from your emergency Prosecco run to the shops, you’re the one who ends up catching them.
#crowley x reader x aziraphale#aziraphale x reader x crowley#Fic: the light the dark and the spaces inbetween#Xmassy prompts#good omens x reader#ineffable husbands x reader
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This is one of the first Dracula fanfics I wrote, I put Dracula's words and actions into red to help distinguish them from mine. Let me know your thoughts on how this affects the flow/readability. For a bit of context, this is based on BBCs 2020 Dracula. One of his powers is obtaining memories and information through the taste and smell of blood. That's why he licks for a term he'd forgotten. Please let me know if you enjoy this and if I should post more of my writing!!!
"Drac, do you think I'm a bad person?"
"I think that's a bit too philosophical for a Friday night."
"But you love philosophy."
"I like to study philosophy in the same way that you like to study black holes. You cannot even imagine–"
*looks pensively and moves his tongue around in his mouth before resorting to licking the small wounds on my neck*
"–ah yes spaghettification. I cannot even imagine morality. You don't wish to be crushed by the indescribable force beyond an event horizon and I would hate to believe in good or evil."
"Now THAT'S too philosophical for a Friday night. Just answer my question."
"I'll humour you since I am the closest thing to a god that you will ever know. Everything I know about morality is what the blood tells me. Some people regard themselves as honourable but are quite bitter."
*he moves closer to me, and places his hands authoritatively on my shoulder and looks into my eyes.*
"You often have the soured tinge of guilt, a habit that you must cut back on, for the sake of my enjoyment."
"So my blood tells you I'm guilty? By that account I should be terribly ugly as well."
*getting notably frustrated* "No. Your blood tells me that you are still caught up in the lies humanity likes to tell itself. Concepts of good and evil, beautiful and ugly. They are nearly completely absent from the rest of the universe. They live only in feeble minds that allow them to simmer and grow."
"But when I feel guilt, it becomes real because it is real to me. Isn't that how everything is created?"
"My god, clearly you're not listening to me."
*I grin at the opportunity for a joke to break growing tension* "my... what? I thought that's a name we don't say in this house."
*he flashes a mischievous smirk back at me* "quite right my dear" *moving his hands from my shoulders to my waist to pull me closer to him* "we also don't talk about good and bad" *he kisses my head*
"I'll try to avoid it in the future, maybe we should start a swear jar or something, in case I bring up ethics again."
*looking obviously amused and curious, his voice takes on a decisively playful tone.* "a swear jar??"
"Ya know it's like I have to give you some money every time I swear. Except for instead of saying FUCK, it'll be 'good or evil.'"
"Watch your tongue young lady, or I'll pierce it for you. And yes now that you say that I do recall it, from the 80s. Money is something I have little need for and much of. Now attend my words very carefully darling. Your beloved cat kills baby birds because she was made by nature to do so. I erm ‐harvest‐ blood because I need it to survive. And you, you are often moved by something unseen and powerful that you crave. There is no good or bad in that. Do not bring it up again. Come back with sweet, shame-free blood."
"Drac?"
"Yes?"
"You said 'good or bad' just then, now give me £5"
#vampire fiction#vampire smut#vampires#dracula fanfiction#bbc dracula#bbcdracula×reader#dracula 2020 x reader#dracula 2020#fanfic#fanfiction#sexy vampire#fantasy#short smut#smut writing#smut#one off#oneoff#short fiction
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kind of a specific random question but do you think theres a possibility that shintaros the first one to try and stop being so attached to takane. like one day takane is all haha hey do you need me for anything then shin goes well uhhh- actually no its okay. takane goes what no you arent let me help you with something COME ON
ive drawn this before. so yes i do (from here)
YA i totally think it's like this AT FIRST. takane is totally shamelessly clinging to shintaro and shintaro's like GET. OFF. MEEEE!!!!! and takane's in his room like carpet she's a fucking parasite roach infestation of 1.
like immediate post str i picture this bitch just sleeping over every single day stealing all his clothes and shintaro's like COME ON. i love how in the novels shintaro dresses in front of ene and no one gives a shit in fact ene is like YOU LOOK SO HANDSOME UR SUCH A MAN'S MAN like. when takane has her body back shintaro's like at least get out WHILE I GET DRESSED!! and takane's totally unbothered like whaaaa im not even looking and u never seemed to care to dress in front of me as ene whatever dude. shintaro seething. he's like this sucks she's right ive been getting dressed in front of her the whole time. also takane changes his nasty bed sheets bc she also sleeps in his bed. literally existing symbiotically. srry they're so close and have no privacy i need u to understand.
shintaro acts incredibly grumpy about it and is actively kicking her out daily but takane never seems to get mad at all and if anything she's just pathetically begging him to stayyyy pleaseeeeee u must need me for SOMETHINGGGGGG and shintaro. while yes he is like NO GET OUT also come on. he's so weak if someone especially someone girl coded flutters their eyelashes at him he immediately just goes YEAH ALRIGHT...haruka ayano or takane can all just flutter their eyelashes and shintaro will do anything they say its hilarious.
we've seen ene do this and while shintaro manages to stay strong i think post str he's very weak to takane because he's so guilty over route xxx so sometimes he just gives her whatever she wants out of guilt. like retaining is shintaro's big demise if it wasn't for it maybe he would've been able to just set his foot down and force takane to grow out of her unhealthy attachment.
but noooo... he starts enabling/reciprocating her behavior LOL!!!! like it's indeed takane the one to start the dynamic. she's always been the most attached of the 2. but shintaro is so guilty over the bad route and realises she's always been here even in all other routes. by just saying ugh yes whatever at everything she says he is accidentally becoming part of the unhealthy attachment. i think at first while he WAS attached it wasn't to the point takane drives it. and since she was shameless and pathetic abt it like not hiding it at all that's why he's unconscious it goes both ways bc he's like well ive been acting all grumpy abt it obviously its not me its her!!! but he doesn't realise that as time went on he started liking the dynamic bc its comfy LOL and takane is good company and they love each other ok. hold me im gonna pass out.
this is so early on post str. while takane still struggles with stopping resorting to opening eyes whenever anything gets uncomfortable and while shintaro is still sort of processing all timelines and how he feels about them and stuff. u know me i love flipping dynamics thats why eventually its shintaro following takane while she's like ermmm erm ermmm bc she's been healing while shintaro's been going downhill.
ALSO i think shintaro's mom "knew" of ene. like SHE DOESNT but shintaro was constantly talking to himself in his room so she asks if he's calling with anyone?? shintaro's like ERM...ERMM... YEAH... ITS AN ONLINE FRIEND.... so shintaro's mom is like omg this is THAT friend who was with him while he was all depressed in his room!!! so ratio + shintaro's mom loves takane and since she's always staying over keeps asking if they're dating and is very confused that they say no and neither is EVER flustered they're just like no we aren't 😐 also if shinaya are dating and kisaragi mom knows she probably talks to shintaro like Hey isnt this weird u have a gf and u seem to spend most of ur time with someone else. and shintaro's like UGHHHHH STOPPP ANNOYING MEEE!!! and like momo, kisaragi mom is also sorta scared of approaching shintaro in fear of scaring him away now that he's out and about. so she's like erm okay (still watches from afar)
sorry for going crazy abt shintaro & takane again. they drive me so crazies. they love each other ur honor and its so fucked up
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You and Valkyrie were at the bar drinking and laughing. You were so glad you met her because you got along great. You knew she was running from something and the same with you but at this point in your friendship it was an unspoken understanding that neither of you wanted to talk about it yet. You were cracking up at the bar when you both went to walk and sit down at a table. But, out the corner of your eye, you saw that familiar dark hair and those green eyes. Shit. It was Loki. What the fuck? Why the fuck was he here?! You quickly turned to valkyrie “um, I think I’m gonna get an early night,” you were extra viligant and restless as you tried to hide yourself as you tried to leave the bar. Valkyrie looked at you confused. You noticed Loki moving closer to where you were and you automatically gave him a quick glance, prompting Valkyrie to look over to where you had looked. She raised an eyebrow at you. “So, er, the dark haired dude..you sure you’re not hiding from him?” She chuckled with a smirk. “Can we please just get out of here?” “Fine, but you have to tell me now what the deal is.” You laughed, “yea in your dreams.”
——
“Tell me,” Valkyrie asked sitting on a chair in your room, drinking another bottle of beer. You were standing behind the counter making a very strong cocktail out of anything you could find. “Nothing to tell,” as you started to pour in the vodka. “Who is he? Why you hiding from him, huh?” You mixed the drink and poured a glass for you both and sat down too. You took a massive gulp of your drink before saying, “my ex.” “Ahhh that makes more sense,” she winked, “haven’t seen him around hear before though.” You took another gulp, “yea I really don’t know why the hell he’s here! Val, you have to find out for me or I need to get off this planet. He can’t find me. Ugh I dunno what the hell to do!” “Hold on, did this man hurt you? Because if he did then imma kill him!” “No.. he never hurt me..” “so why you running from him? Yea, it doesn’t take a genius to figure out that that’s why you’re here.” You took another big gulp and sighed, “I left him... cos.. I dunno.. I got scared?” “That’s a lousy excuse!” “It’s a lot more complicated than that...” “Do you love him?” “Yea... a lot.” “So what’s the problem?!” “I just...” Valkyrie sighed. “Fine, I’ll dig around and see what I can find out.”
——
“Thor?!” “Y/n! What on Earth are you doing here?! You just... vanished!” “I know.. I just...” Thor stopped you knowing that you didn’t want to talk about it quite yet but also knowing that he new why you’d vanished. “Er, so what the hell are you doing here?!” Explains about hela and getting lost here. “Erm y/n, there’s something I have to tell you... Loki’s here..” “I know,” you said guiltily. “I saw him the other night but I kinda just ran.. again.” “Do you know how to get off this planet? How did you end up here?!” “Well.. I’m pretty sure Heimdel’s not happy with me.. he brought me to the bifrost and then I kinda tried to teleport and then didn’t know where I was going and ended up here... But y’know, I like it here. I’ve made friends.. I’m free..” “You already have friends and they’re back home,” he said with a sad face and it made you feel even more guilty that you had left them.
Thor tells Loki you’re here. “What?” He turns around surprised and angry at the same time. “Did you just say y/n here?” “Yes... This is where she’s been all this time.” Loki didn’t know what to think of feel. “Why on earth is she here?!” Loki was secretly happy that you’d been found but he was still so bitter and angry at you (you’d left about 6 months ago now). “She.. teleported here..” Thor answered hesistanyly.” “To get away from me I guess?” Loki asked sarcastically. “I think that’s a conversation you and y/n should have.” “Listen we don’t need her help. Let’s just find a way out of here and deal with hela ourselves.” “Brother, you know just as well as I do that we can’t defeat hela alone.” Loki wouldn’t admit it but Thor was right, plus you may be the only hope of getting them out of here.
——
“So Loki knows I’m here?” “Yep,” replies Thor. “So... where is he?” You were desperate to see him but at the same time you were scared - you felt immensely guilty for leaving him especially without saying a word and you weren’t sure how he was going to react. “Ah, she lives,” Loki walked in the room with that fearless and not caring demeanour. You were taken aback by his sudden appearance and you weren’t sure what to say. “Hi..” was all you managed but he just ignored you and turned to Thor. “So what’s the plan then?” Loki said, continuing not even acknowledging your presence. Valkyrie was looking back between you both, stifling a laugh.
——
Thor and Valkyrie had left to do something leaving you and Loki in the same room. It was awkward and the silence was deafening. You cleared your throat, “would you like a drink? I make a great cocktail, it’ll get you good and drunk.” “I’m a god, it’ll take a lot more than that to get me drunk.” He still wasn’t even looking at you. He went to go and leave instead. You grabbed his arm and he turned around to shake it off of him. “Loki..” but no other words could come out of your mouth. Loki seemed so cold and like he just didn’t care but if you knew him like you thought you did, then underneath all of this, he cared deeply. He turned around again ready to leave. “Wait,” you heard yourself saying but Loki continued walking to the door so you teleported in front of him before he could go any further. “Get out of my way y/n.” “We need to talk.” “We don’t. I’m glad you left. It made me realise how much of a mistake I’d made being with someone like you.” You hadn’t expected those words to leave his mouth and you felt your heart break. He laughed, “You are nothing, just a mere human that nobody needs in there lives. I am a god and you are beneath me. I never truly loved you. Ever.” You stepped further away from him trying to stop the tears from falling. Loki’s expression didn’t change. Instead, he pinned you up against the door and displayed that “evil” smile you knew all to well. “You are NOTHING to me, understand? I can’t believe how low I’d sunk to be with someone like you.” You looked in his eyes but he didn’t falter for a moment. You teleported away.
You deserved every single word he’d said to you. Every single word. However, Loki was still in the room, trying to keep the “strong” appearance up but he felt nothing but pain and guilt. Of course he never meant a word he’d said... maybe that’s why she left, because he really was a monster. You’d hurt him, yes, but he never wanted to hurt you and he knew he just did. But Loki would be damned if anyone saw him hurting - he thought it made him weak and pathetic.
——
You’re all on the spaceship to Asgard to stop hela. Everyone woke up after you’d all passed out from going through the portal but you hadn’t woken up yet. Loki undid his seatbelt and immediately went to you. “Y/n, wake up,” but there was no movement from you. “She’ll be okay Loki, it’s just from going through the portal,” Bruce called back to him (have to work Bruce into the story.) Loki tapped you cheek with his hand, “y/n wake up.” Despite what Bruce had said, he was still worried. You slowly opened your eyes to Loki smiling at you. You sleepily smiled back but Loki realised what he was doing and suddenly moved back from you, going back to his seat. “Ah y/n, you’re awake!” Thor called back. “Yep, that was one hell of a trip! You’d think it’d be okay for me considering I can teleport,” you groaned sitting yourself back up. You looked at Loki but he was just staring ahead. Even if it was for a split second, at least you knew he still cared. “Well Prince Charming there nearly tried to give you the kiss of life, I think!” Valkyrie called back laughing. A slight smirk appeared on Loki’s face but still not looking at you. Still, it’d been a while since you saw him smile a little.
——-
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You Put My Comatose Girlfriend On Display?
Lizzie & Male Reader (x Hope?)
Genre: Crack
Request: Straight forward really. Hope and reader are in a secret relationship and when lizzie is designed as hope he finds her in private and kisses her and lizzir finds out about their relationship
You and Hope got together soon after her and Landon broke up. You two had always been close friends, so one night when she needed to talk about how guilty she felt for breaking up with him, you were there to comfort her. One thing led to another, you kissed and accidentally confessed your feelings for each other, but out of respect for Landon you decided to keep things a secret.
Lizzie needed a breather from everything that was going and had found an empty classroom. She didn’t know Hope did it all the time, being her was kind of exhausting.
You, seeing your girlfriend, quietly slipped into the room to check in on her as she was focusing on her breathing.
“Hey, how are you holding up?” you asked, coming up behind her and kissing her on the cheek.
Lizzie jumped and spun around to see you. “Y/N! What the hell was that?!”
You looked at her, confused by her reaction. After all, you were just trying to comfort her. “Sorry. There’s no one else around, I thought it was okay.”
She stared at you with wide eyes, realising that she was out of character.
“You alright?”
“...Yes,” she said, putting on a wide nervous smile. “Of course I’m fine. Everything is totally fine.”
You held your gaze, not believing a word, until she finally caved in.
“Okay, fine. It’s Lizzie,” she admitted.
“What about Lizzie?”
“No you doofus, it’s me: Lizzie.” she said but she could still see the expression on your face. She sighed and took the ring off and took off the disguise.
Out of all the things you’ve seen from your time at the school, this was definitely the weirdest. You stood there with your mouth opened but couldn’t think of anything to say.
“So I’m kinda in witness protection right now. You know, since my sister has entered her whole goth phase and tried to kill me, plus do you honestly think I’d let you guys be in charge of planning my funeral? Just look at how you’ve chosen to dress yourself. Like seriously, when I say over my dead body, I don’t even mean that. Like--”
“Wait,” you said, cutting her off as you still tried to process the information. “If you’re disguising yourself as Hope, Then where’s the real Hope?”
“In a magically induced coma. Long story.”
“Coma?!” you exclaimed despite her casual tone. “I have to see her.”
“That’s gonna be a bit of a problem, she’s acting as my body double at the moment… she’s in the casket.”
“In the casket? What the fuck? You put my comatose girlfriend on display?!”
“I mean when you put it like that-- Girlfriend?” she said, cutting herself off as she got distracted by your words. “You and Hope Dating??”
“I-- erm, we uh--” you caught stammering as you tried to come up with an explanation.
“Since when?” she pressed you. “Y/N, Spill it!”
“Er-- No, I see what you’re doing here. You can’t brush off Hope being in a coma just like that!”
“It’s not even that bad, it’s more of a deep sleep-- And if anyone is deflecting it’s you!” Lizzie jabbed your chest with her finger. “Now when did you guys get together?”
“A week after she broke up with Landon.”
“A week?! Are you serious?”
“I know it’s bad, that’s why we wanted to keep it a secret.”
“You know how shady it’s gonna look like when the squad finds out.”
“Please don’t tell anyone,” you pleaded, putting your hands together. “Hope will kill me.”
Then you heard a couple students in the halls.
“Have you seen Hope? Dr. Saltzman is looking for her.”
“Nope.”
Then you and Lizzie looked at each other.
“Fine.” she said, putting the ring back on. ”But you owe me.”
You both went to walk out the room and you gave her one final glance and cringed. “I can’t believe I almost kissed you.”
Tags: @prglitch
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I.R.L.📷1
Warnings: noncon sexual acts and rape, voyeurism/exhibitionism, slight stalking, masturbation, naughty talk.
This is dark!(camboy!)Andy Barber. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.
Summary: Your guilty pleasures becomes and all too real terror.
Note: I split this into two because it kept stretching on and on ahah. But I hope you’re ready for a creepy ass camboy.
Thank you so much for your patience! And support!!
As always, if you are so inclined, please like, reblog, and comment. <3
You could blame your break-up or the pandemic but you were just lonely. Besides, Cam left you a year ago and the quarantine was long over. It seemed the whole word had moved on except you.
You always got that fluttery feeling when you opened up the tab and typed in the address. You keyed in your username and password and that moment of shame and guilt quickly passed. Men did this all the time so what was the big deal? You had the money and time to waste on the shallow release.
You scrolled through the active rooms and found ‘SuitNTie80’. There were a few times you tried other rooms but you quickly left, always keeping to your comfort zone, not that you were ever very comfortable. There was that shadow of guilt that lingered after but you learned to live with it.
You sat up and leaned on your arm as you watched the window load and the chat popped up first on the side. You were desensitized to the image of the naked body, the large hand around the thick shaft, stroking and teasing as he issued intoxicating groans. You piled your pillows behind you and bent your legs as you watched lazily.
You were mostly quiet but you were there at least twice a week. You didn’t have much to say in the text box and the thought of a private voice chat was too intimidating for the price. You sent your donations and went on your way once you got yours.
You tickled your leg as your eyes clung to the hair along his muscled chest and stomach, his thick thighs bent and bulging as he gripped his dick firmly. He was huge, not that you were ever a size queen, but it was a nice escape, a careless fantasy. It wasn’t hurting anyone to look.
You hummed and reached for your vibe. You leaned back and teased your clit. You got wetter as he moved around and the bold yellow font popped up in the chat box. You hit ‘pay’ and bypassed the tier. The chat dwindled and the muscular body laid back so that his dick stood straight. He continued to play with himself as he pushed his head into the pillow.
You grabbed your dildo and angled it down along your folds. You poked and prodded until you slipped inside just a little. You pulled back and pushed back in until you could take most of it, the vibe still buzzing against your bud.
Another paywall popped up and again you hit the big button and confirmed. You kept the transactions on your credit card and didn’t think much until the statement showed up. Again, the audience dwindled. It was Wednesday, there weren’t as many as the weekends.
You got comfortable again and pumped the toy as you rubbed the stimulator against your clit. You bit your lip and whined, close. The deep voice stopped you.
“Looks like it's just you,” he said as he sat on the edge of the bed and kept his hand moving.
You typed a hey into the chat and sent another tip. He smiled, only the bottom half of his face visible, the trimmed beard defined his already sharp jaw. You fell back again as you tried to focus on his hand.
“You’re here a lot, honey,” he purred and rasped as he rolled his palm around his tip, “every week…”
You froze and sat up stiffly, careful not to push the toy deeper.
“You don’t have to be shy,” he cooed, “we can go into a private room.”
You didn’t know what to say. You just wanted to cum and lay down. Forget about another long day back in the office.
“No charge,” he offered, “I’d just like to hear your voice.”
Your fingers tapped noisily over the whir of the toy, ‘why?’
“You’re my most loyal customer,” he slowed his hand, “just curious.”
You just sat there, your heart pounding. You liked not being seen, just watching quietly, just being there in the audience. You were embarrassed he even noticed the frequency of your attendance. You eased the toy out of you as you leaned an arm on your leg. You hovered the cursor over the leave icon.
The invited for a private room popped up and kept you from clicking, “just a few minutes, honey, I’m almost done and I wanna help you finish.”
You bit the inside of your lip and dragged your finger down the trackpad. You hit ‘accept’ and a pop-out window buffered as it requested access to your microphone. You could mute once you were in. You confirmed and the private room loaded. You maximized it and drew your hand back sharply, already regretting the decision.
“How are you doing, honey?” he asked, “anyway you want me?”
You stared at the screen, overwhelmed by the spontaneity and your natural shyness.
“I hear your toy,” he said softly, “why don’t you tell me what you’re playing with?”
You gulped and the mattress spring squeaked as you shifted, “um, I’m okay,” you answered his first question, “how are you?”
“I’m great,” he pushed the camera back and sat so that you could see all of him, “it’s nice to hear the voice behind the name.” His teeth grazed his lip as his muscles tensed and he groaned, “so what do we got, hmm?”
“Er,” you looked down, the toy buzzing against your thigh as you’d let it slip thoughtlessly, “a vibe and... “
“And…” he coaxed, “what else, honey?”
“Um, a dildo?” you said weakly, “erm, yeah.”
“Is it inside you?” he asked.
You choked and tried to smother it. You sniffed and clicked off the toy. “Sorry, I don’t think--”
“I want it inside you, now,” he said firmly as he stroked himself, “I want you to imagine it’s me, that i’m stretching you.”
You gaped at the screen as he watched you expectantly, almost as if he could see you. You always kept your camera covered though so at least he could only hear how clueless you were.
“Turn the vibe back on and put that dick inside of you,” he snarled, “come on, honey, for me.”
“I…” you breathed, “okay…”
You shakily hit the button so it vibed again. You asked yourself what you were doing as you slipped it down against your clit and pushed the dildo into you before it could slip out completely. You squeaked and he growled as his hand sped up.
“Mmm, is it in?” he asked, “all of it?”
“Y-yeah,” you murmured, “as much as… I can.”
You cringed at your own answer and he grinned.
“Oh, you’re tight?” he teased, “sounds like you need to be broken in.” You let out a breath as you sat unmoving, filled but paralysed by the intimacy of the chat, “go on, I wanna hear you, honey. I can’t finish if I can’t hear you.”
You hesitated but laid back against the mountain of pillows. You rolled the vibe flat to your clit and moved the dildo slowly. You quivered as the ripples flowed through you and made your toes curl, your legs splayed wide around your laptop. You can hear how wet you are as instinctively you move the toy faster and moan.
“That’s it, honey,” he cooed, “listen to you, hmm? So we for me…” his voice was a series of gasps as he added lube to his length and sped up, “how close are you?”
“C-close,” you rasped.
“Good, good,” his knuckles turned white as he worked his hand even faster, “I want you to picture me… balls deep… fucking you until your hips hurt… until you can’t walk…”
You let out a pathetic mewl as you fucked yourself harder with the toy, to the point of pain.
“What’s you’re favourite position, honey?” he asked as he used both hands on himself.
“Oh, uh…” you shuddered as you thought, trying to keep the toys in action, “doggy… I think.”
“Mmm, wouldn’t you like me behind you, pounding into that tight little cunt,” he puffed, “I can only imagine how tight you’d squeeze me… the way you’d shake… you think you could take it? Hmm?”
“Y… y… yes,” your voice fizzled out and you let out a strained cry as you came abruptly.
You panted wildly and turned onto your side as you squeezed both toys between your legs and groaned. A grunt brought your attention back to the screen as you twitched. The man cradled his sack as he came and strings spilled from his tip as his voice rumbled from the speakers. He smeared his cum all down his length until he was a mess and let his shoulders fall as he stilled his hand.
“Was that good, honey?” he asked as he looked into the camera.
“Mhmm,” you uttered as you sat up and slid the dildo out, sending a shiver up your spine.
“Yeah, it was, wasn’t it?” he stood and came closer to the camera, bending so that you could see his face clearly, he was startlingly handsome, “can we do it again?”
“I… don’t know,” you replied as you turned off the vibe and covered yourself as if he could see you, “maybe.”
“You did really well, sweetie,” he smiled, “and I really like your voice.”
“I…” you sniffed and swallowed as you glanced around your dark bedroom. Is this what you’d come to? “I gotta go.”
You hit ‘leave’ and immediately felt awful. As much for leaving him hanging as even indulging in the chat. You rubbed your temples and bent your fingers against your skull as you gripped your head. How sad could your existence be?
📷
The disconnect icon came up and Andy sighed. He closed down the chat and logged out. He sat and cleaned himself, gently as he was overly sensitive from over an hour of stimulation. He enjoyed his little sessions and he made a decent penny, not that he really needed the money. It was more the high than the dollar sign.
He pulled on a loose pair of silk pajama pants and the fabric tickled his tip cloyingly. He closed the lid of his laptop and tidied the room, stripping the bed and putting the plain cotton sheets back on. He sat heavily to catch his breath and leaned back on the heels of his hands.
He always saw her username in the chat when she entered and tipped but she never said anything. He didn’t think much of it, she was just another regular. LacyLilac; it was a cute name. He was just bored and wanted to try something new. It was fun and thrilling and just the sound of her wet cunt made him twitch.
He kept thinking about her voice. He was disappointed she left so quickly. He would’ve liked to talk a little longer but it was just a porn chat after all. What more did they have to say to each other?
He tried to match her voice to a face in his head. She was probably cute; she sounded young. Well, lots of people were younger than him. He was probably one of the oldest cammers on the site.
She was shy though and he liked that. He’d married the outspoken one and he was over it. That turned to shit fast and look where it got him. Alone and pimping himself out for kicks. Yeah, it was fun at first, he liked being watched, it was always a game for him. He used to play with himself at his desk in his office, sometimes the interns caught him but they never said anything. They were too afraid.
That was all gone too. That life was behind him, so far it almost felt like it never happened. He wished it never had; wished he hadn’t wasted the time.
He stood and sighed. He took his laptop from the table and slipped it under his arm. He went downstairs and opened it on the counter. He let the screen saver bounce as he grabbed a beer from the fridge. He popped the cap off with the edge of the granite and watched the little wisp of mist rise from the neck.
He tapped on the pad and scrolled through his activity log. He found her name and clicked on it. Her profile was mostly empty except for the profile pic, a stock photo of lilacs. He got nothing from scrolling up and down the blank fields. Well, he knew a few tricks the cops passed onto him back in the day.
He opened another tab and quickly generated the link. He went back to her profile and clicked the little speech bubble beside her username. He took a moment before he began to type.
‘Hey, honey, I had fun. I hope to see you again on Friday <3. My schedule’s changing soon, you can see it here.’ He attached the link and hit send. He took a swig of the hoppy beer and leaned an elbow on the counter.
All she had to do was click that link, if she didn’t, he’d have to figure something else out. Or maybe just give up.
The computer chirped as a green dot appeared beside her name. She was online. He saw the little eye beside his message and the dots as she typed. She stopped and he waited. Nothing.
He clicked back to the other window and opened up the visitation log for the link. He smiled and took another deep gulp. She’d done it. She tried to use the link and now he could see everything; her IP, her location, her internet provider. It was just enough to work with.
Bing. He switched back over to the chat and finally her response hung beneath his in a bubble.
‘Thx. I’ll try. The link doesn’t work tho.’
He typed with one hand as he finished his beer in sips, ‘sorry, honey. I’ll fix that and send an updated link when I get a chance. Have a good night <3.’
‘Good night,’ she responded and the green dot disappeared.
He set aside his empty bottle and closed the laptop. He was hard again. It didn’t usually happen so soon after a session. It was why he spaced them out. But he was throbbing so violently that just standing straight made him groan.
He gripped the counter and shoved his hand down his pants. He closed his eyes and exhaled as he quaked at his own touch. He thought of her little ‘ums’ and ‘ers’ and the buzz of her toy. Such a shy little thing acting so innocent and yet she was always there, watching him.
Fuck, it wouldn’t take much more. Not as he thought of how she couldn’t even fit the whole toy in her sweet cunt. He would help her with that.
📷
The anomaly soon grew to a habit. The second meeting was just as awkward. You didn’t do private chats, it was just easier to fade into the background, but the third was easier. Despite how your nerves flurried and your hair stood on edge, he made you feel comfortable, made you relax as you neared the tipping point.
That night, you promised him you’d be in the chat but things always went to shit when you had plans. You were almost relieved as your after hours activities were starting to get in the way of your work. You found it hard to focus when he kept sending you messages that filled your burner email.
You sat before the blue-tinted hue of the monitor, your eyes watering as the colours seared into your retinas. The spreadsheet left a template in your vision and you saw the little boxes even as you leaned back and rubbed your eyes. Maybe another hour and you could go and forget about the colour-coded rectangles.
You sighed and took out your phone. You looked out at the pen of cubicles, your small office forgotten in the corner. You handled the numbers and those only mattered when someone needed a new chair or the holiday party was coming near, and those tasks were easier left to the interns.
You yawned and swiveled back and forth in your chair. The little envelope floated in the margin. You dragged down the status bar and hit the icon. Your inbox was filled with alerts to new messages on the chat site. You only had your shell email account attached to your phone and kept to incognito mode on your laptop.
Only Lucy was still around and she was having a loud phone call on speaker a few offices down. She basically lived at her desk and served as a harbinger of your future. You opened a private window and signed in. You went to your profile and checked the blinking message box.
‘Hey, starting soon.’
‘On live now!’
‘Where are you, honey?’
‘About to go private.’
The last message was a sad-looking emoji and you shook your head. This was why you needed to stop. It felt special at first to be noticed, to feel wanted even if you were just a money sign, but it was growing exhausting. You hardly even enjoyed it anymore, you were just there to get off and get it over with.
‘Srry, caught up at work. Not going to make it tn.’
You hit send and blacked out your phone. You went back to the lifeless excel columns and compared it with the garbled mess corrupted on the second monitor. You told Stuart over and over to eject it properly and didn’t understand how the file hadn’t been uploaded to the company cloud. You shuffled through your papers and shrugged it off. No use being angry, no one cared.
Your phone vibed again. You ignored it and kept typing, looking through reports by the month as you keyed in numbers. A year's worth of tracking all down the drain. Buzz, buzz, buzz. Your phone wouldn’t stop.
You opened up your phone and went back to the private window. ‘You couldn’t tell me earlier?’ ‘Hello?’ ‘What did I do, honey?’
The messages came close together and you looked over at the log. His chat had gone inactive; it was early. You were slightly addled and confused by that.
‘It’s work. I haven’t had a chance. Can’t talk. Logging off. See you Friday.’ You hit the arrow and excited the window.
You dropped your phone face down and hung your head back in exasperation. Your guilty pleasure was becoming a second job. The guy had enough viewers, he could hardly be missing your wallet that much. It was starting to get weird and you weren’t so sure you were going to tune in that Friday, you might be better off to catch up on your sleep.
📷
You kept your laptop off on Friday and opted instead to catch up the latest episodes of your favourite trash tv. The week was long enough to have you dozing off by the second episode and you woke early on Saturday, feeling more groggy than refreshed. Even so, you had two days to yourself.
Two days to catch up with your personal life. You went to the kitchen and used the last of the coffee. And the cream. Time for a shop. Well, you could still make a fun day out of it. There was a café in the same plaza as the grocery store so you could stop in and pretend like you were enjoying your time off with whatever specialty flavour they offered that day.
You didn’t get out before noon as you dragged your feet. Your mind kept drifting to your claustrophobic office and the migraine-inducing spreadsheets. You tried not to, fought your own mind as you steered into the parking lot, but you knew you had another week of bullshit awaiting you.
You grabbed a cart and made your rounds of the aisles, sighing as you waited on octogenarians to decide on a grain of bread. You hurried to check-out before you could get caught behind another dawdler and paid, piling your goods in your cart impatiently. You rolled out the lot and filled your trunk, pushing the cart back to the receptacle with the rest.
You hit the lock button on your keys and headed to the cafe. You eyed the strawberry and cream latte on the board as you stood in line. A deep voice drew your attention from the menu and your heart stuttered as you looked at the man at the till. It couldn’t be.
You got a better look at his face as he eyed the desserts in the glass case and pointed to the one he wanted. How in the fuck? The world couldn’t be that small. You tucked your chin down as your cheeks burned. You could only think about the image of him, or really his more intimate parts, and his low moans.
He swiped his card and moved along the counter. You stood frozen, not moving until the person behind you told you it was your turn. You apologized and moved up to the till. You stammered out your order and fumbled with your wallet, keeping your head down as you paid.
You kept your distance as you moved to wait in the corner until your turn at the window was called. You stared at the floor and tried to dissipate into the air as you pondered just leaving without your drink. When your name rang in your ears, you stepped up without look and collided with another.
“Oh, sorry,” the familiar voice made your eyes round, “shoot.”
You winced and pulled your shirt away from your chest as the hot coffee seeped down your front. You shook out the fabric and shook your head.
“It’s fine, I-- I wasn’t looking where I was going,” you dared to look up at him, unsurprised by your luck, “I hope I didn’t, er, spill too much.”
“I’m more worried about burning you,” he said, “you sure you’re alright?”
“Fine,” you repeated curtly and stepped around him, “really.”
You grabbed the paper cup and spilled even more hot liquid onto your fingers in your urgency. When you turned back the man was just ahead of you and he waited as he held the door for you. You ducked your head down as you passed him and thanked him with a mumble.
“No problem,” he said as he dropped the door.
You stepped off the curb and almost tripped. You didn’t look back as you rushed over to your car and searched for your keys in your pockets. You hit the button and quickly opened the door and flopped into the seat, placing your cup in the holder as more foam and espresso spilled from under the lid.
You hung your head back and sighed. You cringed and wanted to scream. You gripped the steering wheel and shook the whole car in your tantrum. As if your life couldn’t get worse. You were just one disaster after the other.
You wiped your hand on your jeans and started the car. Oh well, a forgettable slip-up. You wouldn’t remember it next week and he likely wouldn’t either. He didn’t even know who you were. Didn’t know you were one of the perverts watching him on their screen as they sat in the dark, lonely and desperate.
You pulled out of your spot and steered between the rows as you neared the exit. Fuck, you thought to yourself, you probably paid for that coffee. Ugh, why were you doing this to yourself? Making yourself feel worse and for what? He put himself on the internet, you were just supporting him.
“Just shut up,” you said to your inner voice as you turned out into traffic, “just stop.”
#andy barber#dark andy barber#dark!andy barber#andy barber x reader#camboy!andy barber#fic#dark fic#dark!fic#two shot#one shot#irl#defending jacob
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Stupid waiters
A/N: Hope you enjoy.
Summary: Tom had a special evening planned and the waiter tries to ruin his mood.
Warnings: Bit of swearing.
W/C: 2.1K
Tom was incredibly annoyed as he watched the waiter flirt with you. He’d just come back from filming and he had a special evening planned with you but this guy was ruining that plan and his mood. You hadn’t noticed or if you had you hadn’t said anything. He watched as the waiter placed your drink in front of you and flirt very obviously (in Tom’s opinion) with you and he didn’t even spare Tom a glance. He huffed as the waiter walked away.
“You okay?” You asked him as he clenched his fist under the table.
“That guy is pissing me off.” He mumbled.
“Why?” You asked with furrowed brows and he scoffed lightly.
“Y/N, he is all over you.” Tom pointed out.
“Is he?” You asked looking genuinely curious, you hadn’t noticed.
“It’s so obvious!” Tom almost raised his voice.
“Tom, calm down.” You laughed lightly. “I’m here with you and I think that’s pretty obvious. I’m not interested.” You said as you reached your hand across the table that he gladly took as you laced your fingers together. He felt his annoyance wash away, you were right and this was a special night. You were here with him and he knows you love him, there’s not a second that’s gone by where he doubts that.
“Okay, I’m sorry.” He muttered and you squeezed his hand lightly.
“It’s fine. A little jealousy is healthy, I’ve been guilty a couple of times.” You laughed.
The main course arrived and although the waiter was continuing to flirt a little Tom found himself only slightly irritated now. That was until the waiter cleared the mains and offered a desert menu.
“Can I interest the lady in a desert, I’m sure I can recommend one as sweet as you.” Tom’s blood was boiling now and he watched as you cringed at the god awful pick up line.
“I don’t know, baby do you want one?” You asked Tom as you put emphasis on the nickname. That’s right dickhead, she’s not interested, she’s mine Tom thought and instantly cringed at his internal thought. You weren’t some toy he could lay claim but he was pissed with this guy.
“Yeah, we’ll have a look.” Tom answered as he watched the waiter visibly deflate as you made it clear you were here with him. He couldn’t help his smirk as he waiter wandered off for a menu.
“Okay, fair play. He’s pretty obvious.” You laughed.
“I don’t get it, you’re clearly here with me. Why is he carrying on?” Tom groaned as you shrugged your shoulders.
“I must just be irresistible.” You teased as you brought your glass to your lips.
“You are.” Tom said in such a matter of fact manner that you snorted.
“Lighten up. It’s not like it’s gonna work.” You playfully rolled your eyes.
“That’s not the point.” Tom said as the waiter returned with the menu. He eyed your almost empty glass.
“Another drink for the lovely lady?” He asked and you politely accepted and Tom nearly swung for the guy. He’d stepped up his flirting now from when you’d first arrived. Tom clenched his jaw at the interaction and he felt you smooth your thumb over his hand that was still on the table.
“It’s Y/N by the way, if you are going to insist on calling me anything it should be by what most people that aren’t my boyfriend do.” You said in a polite but stern way. He knew you weren’t one for conflict but he appreciated that you were reminding this dickwad that you weren’t interested.
“Y/N? That’s a beautiful name.” The waiter said with a wink and Tom nearly blew his stack, face going red with anger as he clenched his jaw so hard he worried he might crack his teeth.
“Erm, thanks.” You said awkwardly. The waiter smirked and Tom swears he saw his eyes drift towards him for a second before he left.
“Tom, calm down it’s okay. Don’t let it ruin your mood.” You tried to calm him down. “I love you okay and I’m here with you. I love you.” You smiled at him and he returned a tight lipped smile as he tried to regain control of his anger. He was calming himself until the waiter returned and just seeing him made Tom’s blood boil.
“Any desert?” He asked as you gave him your order, Tom hadn’t even looked at the menu.
“We’ll take the sticky toffee pudding and two spoons.” You answered for the both of you as you watched Tom shift in his seat. The waiter glanced at Tom for a second, smirking before he spoke.
“That desert is a lovely choice. Very sweet.” He said and he put so much emphasis on the words that Tom knew now he was trying to wind him up. Your hand found his as you squeezed again in a failed attempt at calming him down.
“Are you serious?” Tom said through gritted teeth as the waiter looked at him in fake innocence and Tom could have ripped his head off there and then for ruining his mood and plan.
“Apologies I didn’t mean to offend.” He said before walking away and Tom ran his hands through his hair messing it up slightly.
“I swear if he carries on I’m gonna hit him.” Tom grumbled and you gave him a sympathetic smile.
“I’m sorry Tom. We’ll go after this.” You said and he huffed.
“No, I’m sorry. I’m letting it get the better of me. I don’t mean to.” He said, had it been any other night he’d probably have contained his anger and annoyance better.
“No Tom, he’s being inappropriate. I’d be upset if I were you.” You smiled at him. You wanted to make him feel better as you watched the waiter return with your desert and although it was slightly inappropriate in such a lovely restaurant you found yourself standing up and Tom watched you with furrowed brows. You smiled at him as you made your way round to him and sat on his knee as you turned his face to look at you and connected your lips in a sweet kiss. One of his hands instantly finding your waist and the other holding your cheek.
Tom could swear he heard the waiter scoff as he walked away and you disconnected your lips as you smiled at him.
“I love you.” You whispered against his lips and he grinned.
“I love you darling, thank you.” He watched as you made your way back to your seat and he found his anger washing away a little at the gesture you’d made. He really did love you.
You ate your desert and it was actually very sweet as the waiter had said and you both enjoyed it. When he cleared the plate, looking much more deflated than previously you asked for the bill. When he brought it back, Tom got his card out to pay and the waiter made the grave mistake of bringing up one of Tom’s insecurities.
“At least he pays, I suppose it makes up for all those nights he leaves you alone.” The waiter said to you in a jokey manner and you visibly gulped. Of course this man knew who Tom was, he’d booked it under his name and who didn’t know who spiderman was? You watched as Tom snapped his head towards the waiter and his face was red with anger.
“Pardon?” Tom spat.
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to offend you but I assume when you film all these movies you leave her alone. I’m just reminding her that not all men would do that, you know, some men would be there all the time.” He fired back as he crossed his arms over his chest. Was this guy trying to lose his job?
It didn’t matter what you said, Tom always worried that he was neglecting you when he had to leave. Of course, you didn’t see it this way and told him so all the time, he didn’t have to be with you physically to be there for you and he proved that all the time. This guy had no idea what he was talking about. You felt your jaw drop at his rudeness and complete brazenness. He would not be coming back here to work ever again. You made you way over to Tom as you grabbed his tense bicep in your hands.
“Tom, leave it. It doesn’t matter what he thinks, he doesn’t know what you do for me or a single thing about our relationship. He’s not worth it.” You said as you tried to get him to calm down, that wasn’t happening.
“I have watched you throw yourself at my girlfriend in an embarrassing manner tonight. She made it clear she wasn’t interested and you persisted, which by the way, is wrong whether she is in a relationship or not. I will be reporting you to the manager of this place for your rudeness. Thank you for ruining my fucking evening!” Tom shouted at him as he made his way towards the exit.
You were dumbfounded for a second as you heard him shout. Sure, Tom had put people in their places before but this must have really bothered him, it took a lot to make him shout. You scrambled after him and had to almost run to catch up.
“Tom. Tom!” You shouted as you tried to get him to slow down. When he turned around you could see his bloodshot eyes and as you reached him you saw the tears brimming them. You placed your hands on his face and made him look you in the eyes. “Tom, forget what he said. You are there for me all the time. I know you go away to film but that’s okay, I’m happy for you to pursue your career, you deserve it, you’re so talented. Tom, I don’t know how many times I have to tell you that you don’t have to be there physically to be there for me. I love you and I don’t want anyone else.” You said and he sighed, looking down.
“It’s not just that. He ruined everything. I had this whole evening planned and I was gonna ask you to marry me and then he reminded me that you deserve better.” Tom rambled through his tears and you felt the breath get knocked out of you. He was what?
“You were- Tom what- you were gonna what?” You stammered out as you felt your heart rate increase. Tom must have realised what he’d said and he snapped his eyes to yours.
“Shit. I wasn’t meant to say that. I’m sorry.” He stuttered out before he took a deep breath. “Look I was gonna ask you to marry me tonight and he just-“
“Yes.” You interrupted him and he looked at you for a second, eyes wide.
“What?”
“Yes, I’ll marry you.” You said as tears made there way down your face, all happy, and he grinned.
“Really?” He asked as he fished around in his jacket pocket.
“Tom, I love you, you get me on a level no one, not even my family, ever has before. Of course I’ll marry you. No stupid waiter who doesn’t know what he’s talking about is gonna change that.” You laughed as he grinned and took the small box from a pocket in his jacket.
“At least let me do it properly.” He said as he got down on one knee, taking your hand in his. “Y/N. I know I’m not always here physically but I will always be there for you, wherever I am in the world. You make me a better person and I couldn’t be more thankful for you. You always push me to do better and you are my rock and I hope I can always be that for you. I promise I will always try and reciprocate the insane amount of love you give. I love you. So, Y/N L/N, will you marry me?” He asked and tears of happiness where finding their way down both of your cheeks.
“Yes, I love you so much.” You cried as you lunged yourself at him, almost catching him off guard as he only just caught you in a hug. You loved Tom and he was everything you wanted, needed and more.
#tom holland#tom holland imagine#tom holland one shot#tom holland x reader#tom holland fluff#tom holland angst#tom holland x y/n
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complicated one for the blurb thing: 🚪 🗣💦
can’t wait to see what you do with this mwah
🚪 showing up at the other's door, begging for comfort
🗣 having an argument
💦 sleeping together for the first time
The door slams in her face, though truly, she wasn’t expecting much more. But fuck if Peter isn’t the only person she trusts. The only person she knows will help her... eventually. The only person she’s desperate to see.
“Peter,” she whispers, her forehead resting against his door. “Please.”
It hurts to be here. To be so close to everything that makes her feel safe and worthy - and to be on the other side of it all. To feel the hatred she always knew she deserved, to see the cold side of the door Peter always should have shown her but he didn’t.
He trusted her and he let her in and she betrayed him. The heartbroken look on his face as he realised she was just a pawn for Kingpin haunts her at night.
“Just go away, Michelle.”
“Just - five minutes, please, Peter.”
The door swings open and he’s fuming and he’s so utterly beautiful she almost whimpers but she stops herself.
“Five minutes to what? Worm your heart into my heart just so you can tear it out again?”
“That’s not what -”
“Or maybe you’re here because I was kind to you. Because I was the only person that ever wanted you for anything other than your body or your fucking face.”
“Peter -” she tries. She knows he's hurt. She also knows he knows she didn't have a choice. Not that that means anything right now.
“It’s not my fault your worthless, Michelle,” he spits out. His voice is venomous even as his face betrays him and shows her exactly how he immediately regrets his words. The words she shared with him when they were drunk and she was stupid enough to trust him.
She sucks in a breath by accident, her ribs aching as she does.
“MJ,” he whispers, his eyes wide with unshed tears. She knows he’ll feel guilty for his words forever even if she deserves them. “I’m sorry - I didn’t -”
“You did,” she replies. She doesn’t want him to see how his words affect her. And she never really wants to see him again now anyway so showing him she was injured wasn’t her best move. He’ll probably still let her go if she fights him on it - but she’s so tired. “It’s fine, it’s true anyway.”
“It’s not,” he begs, then, “are you hurt?”
“It’ll heal.”
“Please, I’m sorry, just - let me help.” She owes him that at least.
---
Peter’s hands are light against her shoulder, though the last stitch pulls anyway. She hides the pain pretty well, but he catches it.
“Sorry,” he mumbles. MJ forgot how well he could hear, how well he knew when she was hiding.
“It’s okay,” she whispers. God, she’s so tired. Life was good for a while. Even with the debt to the crime lords, she should never have owed, the fact she has no desirable qualifications besides the ability to steal, the fact that no one has ever loved her. She had Peter. And he was the calm in the storm.
And then she lost him.
“Is this why you came here?” he asks, his touch heavenly as he brushes the bandage to her laceration.
“Yes and no,” she sighs.
“Will you tell me?”
She knows he deserves the truth. She also knows he won't force her. He’s probably the only person she’s ever known that wouldn’t.
“Erm, Kingpin is dead... and I’m leaving town.”
“What?” he asks, his voice totally broken. “You’re leaving?”
“That’s what you’re focused on?” she laughs, though she feels anything but happy. Peter tilts her face, his fingers under her chin.
“Why are you going?”
“Come on,” she whispers, then, “don’t make me say it.”
“If he’s - if King is dead... why can’t you stay?”
“I have nothing,” she cracks out. Her face crumples as he holds her in his palms. “Nothing and no one and I just - I need to go. I need to go somewhere where no one knows who I am. Where no one hates me.”
“Em -”
“Please don’t, Peter. Don’t tell me you don’t hate me when I know that’s not true.”
“I could never hate you,” he replies, his thumbs rubbing against her cheeks. “I just - I was so hurt, MJ. I thought you - I thought you really liked me and I - I trusted you and you were just trying to get to Spider-Man. And I know now, I know you didn’t have a choice... that he made you. But I could have helped you. You could have trusted me.”
“I know you’re Spider-Man,” she whispers and he drops his hands.
“What?”
“I’ve known for ages,” she shrugs, her shoulder screaming at her as she does. She always wondered if he’d figured it out - or if he thought she was still trying to be nice to him to work out who the masked vigilante was. Either way, he doesn’t try to deny it.
“You knew?” he asks, his eyes flicking over her face as he clearly tries to figure out why she didn’t kill him if she had so many opportunities. Why she didn’t tell him that she knew when he found out she was sent to lure him into friendship. Why she never told Kingpin.
“Mhmm.”
“Since when?”
“The second week I knew you.”
“What - why didn’t you - why didn’t you tell me?”
“I thought you’d go after Kingpin and I knew he had too much firepower for you to take him down.” She doesn't tell him there's a deeply selfish part of her that didn't want him to leave her - to push her away when he knew she was nothing but trouble.
“Then why didn’t you tell him you knew who I was?” Peter asks and she can feel his eyes all over her as she watches her tears dampen his sofa cushion.
“Because I was in love with you.”
It’s his turn to be caught off guard. He probably won’t believe her either way. Everything about their friendship has been shrouded in betrayal and manipulation. Even if the way his smile made her day better and the way she was always aching to touch him were true. Even if the way she’d willingly die for him was etched into her heart from the moment she met him.
“Did you kill him?” he asks.
“Yes.”
“For me?”
“For me,” she replies, looking up at him once before she looks back at her hands. He’s going to be so disappointed in her. But what’s one more on the list. “And a little bit for you.”
His arms go around her then, his hand heavy against the back of her head as he moves her around. She lets him because the feel of him wrapped around her makes her feel safe for the first time in months.
“You should have told me,” he says, the pain evident in his voice.
“You wouldn’t have been able to save him.”
“I don’t care about him. I should have saved you.”
“Peter,” she cracks out, her fingers tight against his t shirt.
“I should have saved you,” he repeats, his hands flexing in her hair. “I just left - I just left you.”
“You didn’t know,” she sniffs, burying her face in the crook of his neck. “I didn’t tell you.”
“I should have saved you.”
“That’s not your job.”
“You’re not work, Michelle,” he promises, pulling back so he can look at her. “You’re not work. Not to me.”
“I’m sorry,” she whispers. “I’m so sorry.”
“I know, I know, me too.”
---
“How was the shower?” Peter asks, his voice soft as she finishes towel drying her hair.
“Good, thanks,” she replies, her limbs feeling like lead but she’s dressed in Peter’s sweats and she’s not sure she’s ever been comfier. MJ knows she has to walk home but she’s trying to resist the urge to just lay down for a second.
“I can drop the clothes back tomo -” she starts but she’s cut off by Peter’s lips on hers, his hands cradling her face as she all but melts against him.
“Just stay here,” he whispers, pulling her closer. “Just stay here with me.”
“Okay.”
“Just stay with me.”
“Okay,” she repeats.
Peter is close for the rest of the night. Making sure the duvet is right and making sure she’s not cold and that his hand is always somewhere on her body. It’s probably the most cared for she’s ever felt.
It’s a little overwhelming.
“Sorry,” he stutters when she flinches as he goes to move her hair. “I’m sorry.”
“It’s not your fault,” she whispers. “I’m just not used to sleeping with people.”
“Oh, that’s okay,” he says, his feet shuffling against the sheets. “I can keep my hands over here.”
“I like it when you touch me. I just - people usually only want me for - they just want me to do something for them so -”
“You’re not worthless,” he blurts out. “Sorry I didn’t mean to interrupt you - but I shouldn’t - I didn’t mean what I said -”
“It’s okay.”
“It’s not,” he whispers, edging closer slowly but she just pulls him the rest of the way with her hand fisted in his t shirt. “It’s not - you trusted me with that and I shouldn’t have - I shouldn’t have spoken to you like that.”
“I had just turned up after three months, Peter,” she huffs, her nose brushing his with how close she is. “I think I can forgive some harsh words.”
“I’ll make you believe it,” he promises, his lips against hers lightly. She feels giddy with the way he believes his words so clearly. With how she knows he’ll do whatever he can to make her feel loved.
He shows her in the way he checks her cuts every hour. In the way he twists her curls around his fingers. In the way he put paracetamol and water on the bedside table for her. In the way he’s letting her into his bed.
“MJ?” he asks, a little while later. She thought he was asleep but she likes that he’s still awake. Maybe because his voice is a little raspy.
“Yeah?” she replies, rubbing her feet against his.
“Do you think there would be a time where you loved me again?”
"Yes.” She doesn’t tell him she still loves him. That she never stopped and she’s not sure that she could even if she tried. She doesn’t ask him back because she wouldn’t deserve his love even if he did want to give it to her.
“Okay,” he laughs, the smile evident in his tone even if he’s pulled her so close to his body she can’t see it. “Okay.”
“Stop being a loser,” she giggles as he presses kisses to the top of her head, her cheeks, her lips.
“Never,” he says, kissing her hard. “I’d do anything to make you smile.”
#spideychelle#petermj#this got away from me#also copping out again w the sleeping w but they just need the comfort okay????#ask
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ATEEZ FINAL PART : when they said something to hurt you.
I'm glad you've liked the previous part (part 1 and 2 here if you haven't read it yet), so here is a final to all this angsty reactions (if it is a reaction). Sorry if there are a lot of grammar errors, English not being my mother tongue -
Gosh this is going to be LONG please, bear with me ugh.
Hongjoong:
After this stormy episode of him totally lashing his stress out on you, he spent some time alone to think and reflect upon his trashy behaviour. He was genuinely aware of the massive efforts you were doing for his ass. Literally be patient and taking everything on you so he didn't have to feel more stressed. But today was different. He obviously went too far, saying those words horribly. Furthermore, he knew how hurt you've been because of him and now he didn't really know how to be forgiven. He always have been busy, always considering his work first and thought you were in an equal part of this, but seems he considered you taken for granted. The leader sighed heavily, rubbing his eyes not seeing any solutions at the moment. It's at this moment that Seonghwa entered the place. "Erm...Joong ?" he didn't answer, only Seonghwa could see how much his leader was in distress. "I heard from Y/N, mh I mean she told San who told me but anyway-" began the oldest before Hongjoong asked simply: "Have you come to scold me ?" A silence then. "No, I came to check on you." Seonghwa was always worried about his leader, since he knew the best how hardworking and diligent Hongjoong was, but today he felt like he was wrong. "You've acted like a real idiot this time" Hongjoong let a sarcastic laugh be heard as he slowly turned to face his friend. "Yeah, I know. Do you think she will forgive me ?" "Probably not easily." he answered honestly before continuing. "She told San she was tired of this, always being a shadow to you, erm...and nowadays she's been really stressed at work" A shadow ? Is this how you were seeing yourself as ? And on top of that, he was completely unaware of your work, how life has been going for you. This made the leader felt more guilty as he bite his lips. "So...What should I do ? Kneeling and beg her for forgiveness ?" Seonghwa sighed and put a comforting hand on the leader shoulder. "Sometimes actions are better than words".
And he left the studio, putting Hongjoong in a more difficult situation than he was already. What did he mean ? He thought about it again and again, watching without really watching his screen before it tilted inside his head. "THE SONG !!" he yelled at himself, feeling now very dumb. He had almost forgotten this track, a very secret one he composed for a long time. This song was special for him, it was a song which were written for you, and was conveying all of his feelings. He had to make you listen to this. A glance at his phone indicated it was already 3am in the morning, but sleep could wait. He spent the rest of the night finishing this track, or actually checking it before he saved a copy and directly sent it to you, praying you'd see it in the morning.
You'd spent the most horrible night of your life. Crying and turning under your blanket as you felt useless, no one. San proposed to come with Yunho, but you insisted to be alone, so they let you be, though they were worried. You only found sleep around two in the morning, tired for having crying most of the night. You woke up at six, your eyes hurting, puffy and red as fuck. Anyone could tell you've cried your eyeballs out. First you went to the bathroom to clean your face with cold water, your stuffy nose not helping in the process. After a while you returned to your bedroom and took your phone, not expecting to see a message from your boyfriend, or was he still yours ? At first you hesitated to open it, but finally did. No text, just an audio file. What was this ? Taking your headphone, you put them into your ear before clicking on the file, closing your eyes. At first, you were confused. You've never heard any melody like this one, so...calm, bubbly and soft. Soon Hongjoong's voice appeared with lyrics he surely had written and...you broke in tears again. This time not from sadness, but ...it was like a dream. You could heard his feelings, how much he loved you. You were ready to forgive him, but...it wasn't easy. Reconciliations were always difficult for both of you. Brushing this instantly aside, you rushed out from your apartment for going directly to Hongjoong's studio, in home wear, messy hair and "after crying faced" only to find him asleep on the couch. Panting, you rushed to jump on your boyfriend, sobbing again . This caused Hongjoong to wake up in surprise, confused. "Y-Y/N ?" why ? Why were you crying again ? After a while of you crying heavily on his shirt, he realised you probably came after hearing his song. His arms softly hooked around your tiny waist as one hand rubbed your back. "Shh...don't cry" he said, heartbroken to see you like this. "You dummy !" you yelled between two sobs. "I know." "I - I love you" "Me too, I'm sorry for being a huge dummy" he said with a gentle smile, holding your face to wipe your tears.
Seonghwa:
How rude he's been with you. It's only after hearing your answer that he realised you didn't deserve this. He wanted to chase after you, saying he was sorry, but too late, you slammed the door. Hongjoong came to their shared room before leaning at the door's frame, arching a brow at the oldest. "Can you explain to me what did just happen ?" he asked calmly before Seonghwa bite his lower tier. "I've been a jerk with her" he mumbled, not proud of himself this time. "Yeah, we saw this. You know, she only wanted to cheer you up. We all know you're having bad times because of vocal things, but you didn't have to lash out on her." His leader wasn't wrong, only himself was. "Hwa, go after her. It's not too late" said Hongjoong. "Now ?" Hongjoong sighed. "Yes now, not tomorrow or later" Seonghwa blinked, overthinking before his own body stood up and carried him outside the dorm, chasing after you desperately. He shouldn't have had been this way, he should have been thankful to have you by his side, always being cheerful and bright although sometimes you were hiding your own demons. But being a couple meant for the good and the worst right ? After running for a while, he stopped, panting his lungs on fire. He started to think. Where could you be now ? He remembered when you were sad or stressed, you used to go to Starbucks and get a drink full of sugar and whipped cream, that's how he thought you'd at the nearest one. Not minding people watching him when he opened the door, he eyed the room quickly before seeing you at the table across the entrance. He stepped inside and directly went to your seat as you were still sniffing with tears, your drink between your hands. Not expecting to see your boyfriend, you gasped when you finally realised he was standing here without saying anything. "Y/N.." You tried to gain composure, not wanting to appear fragile in front of him. "What are you doing here ? I thought you didn't want to see me" you croaked, looking away coldly. You heard him sitting before you and took your cold hands. "Y/N I'm sorry. I've been a jerk, you didn't deserve this- I know my work isn't an excuse for acting this way, I understand if you don't want to talk to me or-" "Shut up..." you mumbled, suddenly feeling embarrassed as more people were staring at you two. "I will do everything for you to forgive me, really." he said seriously, not quitting your face from his gaze. Some people were whispering and gossiping, and the more they did, the more you felt ridiculous. You stood up quickly and went straight to the exit with your double cold latte with whipped cream, your boyfriend following you closely. "Are you crazy Park Seonghwa ??? Did you forget you're an idole ? Huh ?? What are you going to do if they recognise you ?" You began to yell but Seonghwa stopped you by taking your free hand and said clearly. "Then I will just say you're my girlfriend and that I don't care, cause you deserve way more than this. Beside being an idole I'm a man, and I love you, there's nothing wrong with this, and if they don't like it, screw them !" you were shocked by his fearless answer, and you felt your heart melt again. You were definitely madly in love with him.
Yeosang:
He was aware of his jerk attitude, and as much as he felt guilty, he didn't know how to ask for your forgiveness. The members already scolded him for what he had said earlier but he knew better than anyone that you weren't ready to talk with. You were the type to be angry for a while, not letting space for any peaceful conversation until you'd calm down. He overthought for a while, thinking you'd probably dump him now and he wouldn't see you ever again, or you'd be so mad at him you'd just beat his ass. Tormented, Yunho looked at his friend before saying, not really sure to mingle in his friend's love problems: "Yeosang, I'm not sure about her being mad, I think she's ...sad ?" he said cautiously, nervous about Yeosang's answer. Sad ? He was really dumb. Of course you'd not be mad, or at least not as much as sad. After all he saw you crying when you left, and his motto was all ruined at this moment. "You're right...I should go see her." he said flatly, feeling really bad. "Huh, yeah I don't even understand why you're still here to be honest" said Yunho with a smile. Thanks to him, Yeosang found the courage to go to your apartment, with your favorite pastry from the bakery you both liked to go, and...flowers. Yeosang wasn't the type to make such lovey dovey stuffs, but this time it was important. Inhaling deeply in front of your door, he knocked once, shyly, not sure if you'd hear it. Then he knocked more frankly before hearing footsteps from behind the door and before he knew it, you were standing in front of him as much surprised as he was. "...What are you doing here ?" you asked, rather coldly. He cleared his throat before handling you shyly the flowers. "I...I came to apologise. I've been a real jerk to you earlier...I even promised myself I'd never make you cry, but I failed miserably" he said in a go, probably too embarrassed to say it confidently. There is a silence, as you fix your eyes on your shy boyfriend. Suddenly you wanted to laugh. How laughable it was to see Yeosang acts like he never did before. You can't bear it anymore and just burst out of laugh, laughing so much that you have to hold your hurting belly. Visibly confused, Yeosang frowned a bit. Why were you laughing ? "Oh my god...You're really something else" you said, calming down slowly before taking the flowers. He suddenly lifted his head in hope. "Does it mean you're forgiving me ?" You faked you're still thinking about it, humming in an exaggerate way. "Well, only if you let me eat this" you nudged your chin to the box he was carrying and which you spotted immediately before he gave you the flower. He smiled and shook his head. "Alright, it's all for you then"
San:
He had definitely crossed a line he shouldn't had. After you slammed the door at his nose, he tried to make you open it for a while, but you never opened it again. So he left, defeated. It was supposed to be a romantic moment for both of you since a while, and yet he ruined everything with his mouth. Sometimes he wished he just could rewind and change every thing. Even if he didn't like the dress, he could have accepted it since you were happy, but his selfishness and jealousy got over it and now he was alone, in his car without you. He took his phone, sending you texts. "Babe, I'm sorry, please, you know I didn't really mean it right ?" or "Please answer me, I'm really sorry." etc, but you didn't even open them since they were still on sent. Instead of going back to his dorm, he tried to call you this time. On the fifth time, he let a voice mail, taking a long breath before the beep. "Y/N, I'm really sorry, I didn't want to ruin our date like this, or just ruin it at all. The truth is...you were so pretty in this dress, so sexy that I don't want other men to see you in this, I wanted to be the only one to see you with. You're not a whore, you're not any of this. I'm selfish I know, but please, it's been so long since we went on a date...If you still want to see me...I'll be waiting in front of your building." And he locked his phone, leaning his head on the top of the steering wheel. He didn't know how long he waiting again but he suddenly heard the door of the passenger side opening, making him look at the person who opened it. It was you. With the same dress. He felt his heart stopped as you sat next to him, putting your seatbelt without a word. "Y/N ?" You looked straightforward you, and said simply. "Let's go, I guess the restaurant is still open" you muffled. He couldn't help but smiled happily as he turned the engine on, taking your hand in his before driving and said. "Thank you Y/N, thank you" and kissed the back of your delicate hand.
Yunho:
Since the incident at the practice room, Yunho didn't hear from you for a while. Hongjoong particularly scolded him about how rude he's been on you while you just wanted to wish them good luck for their performance. He knew it right, but at the moment he couldn't have helped but get angry at you. He knew as well it wasn't so like him to get carried away for nothing, so that's why he didn't really know what to do to make amend for you. He made his mind he would apologise right after their stage for Kingdom even if they boys thought it would be better to do it before. He knew you'd definitely watch them, root for them so he put all of his mind and body in this performance, hoping it would bring him luck. And it did since they snitched 1st place although they started low in the classement. When the MC asked Yunho how he felt about their win, the giant boy just shyly smiled before saying with a trembling voice. "I...It meant a lot for us, and to be able to be first is huge honour. We always want to show our best to our fans, Atiny. But today I...wanted to surpass myself for a certain person." Others groups were chatting among themselves, surprised by Yunho's declaration. Changmin, though he was as surprised as the others still asked professionally. "Oh, who would it be ?" Yunho smiled brightly and said confidently. "Y/N, my girlfriend." Some screams and gasps from shock could be heard in the giant room after Yunho pursued: "She's always been by my side and supports me with the best way she can, but lately...I've not been a good boyfriend to her, that's why I wanted to win, for her, and saying that I love her."
Right after the diffusion of this week episode which you've been watching with your friends, you sobbed like a little girl. How proud you were for your boyfriend, and the only thing you wanted now was to take him in your arms, feeling his arms around you. With shaking hands you took your phone to try to call Yunho, but he wasn't answering your call. That's at this very moment you heard the bell of your door and went for it, not expecting to see your boyfriend at your door. "H-hi" he said shyly. You dropped your phone and jumped directly in his arms, crying again. "You're an idiot Jung Yunho...But I love you". He nuzzled the top of your head as he hugged you back tightly. "I love you too, little one."
Wooyoung:
wede Wooyoung always said honestly what he was thinking, and everyone's used to it, so he thought his remarks about your skill about cooking would pass easily, but he was wrong. At first he didn't understand your reaction, why you left like this as he was only joking, or he thought so. Seonghwa nagged at him after you left, saying how rude he's been and at least he could shut his mouth. He felt really guilty. He was the one who made you loose confidence about you, when he knew you're always trying your best. And this time, he really screwed things up. Worst than this, when he ate the cake you'd made, he realised it was really good, and his unfounded claims were really mean. Gathering his courage, he showed up at your workplace, waiting for you at the exit. At first, you didn't want to see him, you haven't digested yet what he'd said to you. But with an expressionless face, you finally appeared in front of him. "Y/N- listen, I'm really sorry, I shouldn't have said those horrible jokes. No, I mean, I didn't mean what I said, the cake was really good." he tried to say quickly, afraid you'd just brush him away. After listening to his words, you just sighed and said "You're really a jerk sometimes you know that ? Maybe I'm not good at some things, but it doesn't give you the right to bash me out like this in front of everyone. Do you understand Wooyoung ?" he looked down at his feet and nodded, muttering "I'm sorry". "Fine, if you're really sorry, you better cook something too" you smirked, a sign from you that you're half forgiving him. "What ? Wait-" he looked at you astonished. "I don't know what to cook" "Huh, well not my problem" you sticked your tongue out to him and caught his arm in yours.
Mingi:
Mingi's been aware that his words probably upset you. But he needed to find himself again, to get right on tracks by himself even if he was thankful towards you, taking care of him for so long and everything. But he felt like it was his duty to make his comeback to the team his, from A to Z. He hoped you would understand, but after you left him alone, he felt guilty to suddenly reject you. The first day of his comeback into the team, Mingi felt really nervous. He wished he could call you and talk to you as he used to, but since that day he didn't dare to contact you. Instead he sent you a long message, saying how much he missed you and felt really nervous. That he was sorry for what he's said and how much you counted for him. He knew deep inside his mind that you had understood his reasons to act this way, and he was right. After reading his text, you couldn't help but fall in love all over again for Mingi. He was so sweet and pure that you couldn't hold grudges against him. You texted back saying "Everything's gonna be alright. Fighting ! I love you" which reassured the rapper.
Jongho:
Although Jongho was the youngest from the team, he was really mature and hated childish behaviour when it comes for his relationship. The fact you got jealous and as a result, acted this way got him angry. For him, the fact he was dating you was a proof of his choice, and love. Things weren't bad with his ex, so he didn't see why he would cut the rope from her, and he expected you to understand his point of view. After calming down on his own, he also realised his reaction must not have been mature as well. He took more time to think about how he was going to reconcile with you, but things shouldn't stay this way. He expected you to be at your place, and directly knocked at the door, feeling nervous. "Y/N ?" he called out for you. It took a moment before you opened the door, clearly still furious about what happened earlier. "What ? Aren't you with Mina yet ?" you spatted out, maybe too agressive than you wished. Jongho took on himself not to react to this again, instead sighing softly. "Baby, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have reacted this way." he began, trying to be the most sincere he was. "You're the only one for me, you know it right ? But you see, Mina is indeed my ex, but it doesn't mean I'm on bad terms with her, and it also means that nothing will happen with her anymore. Because I love you so much and no one else"
#ateez angst#ateez fluff#ateez smut#ateez reactions#ateez imagines#hongjoong#seonghwa#yunho#yeosang#mingi#Wooyoung#Jongho#san
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The Rebel (Cillian X OC OneShot)
Warning - smut - and this IS only a one shot, I can't cope writing another series at the minute 😂
Request? Yep!
Taglist @queenshelby @margoo0 @being-worthy @peakyscillian @janelongxox @elenavampire21 @noctvrnalmoth @ysmmsy @cloudofdisney @lauren-raines-x @namelesslosers @misscarolineshelby @screemqueen @cilleveryone @darlingjaye
"The fuck does she get off?" Cillian cried, throwing his bag across the trailer he shared with Paul Anderson.
"Someone's a fan of my new love interest!" Paul laughed watching Cillian fume as he paced the small trailer over and over again.
"I knew casting her was a mistake, she's fucking delusional!!!"
"What's she done now..."
"Literally THREW her coffee cup at her PA because she put milk in it... THREW IT!!! At her PA!!! Poor girl was fucking terrified man!"
"She's hot though, ain't she?'
"What? Fuck sake Paul you ever NOT think with your dick?" Paul smirked, raising his eyebrows at Cillian knowingly. "Yes okay, she's a good looking girl, but that doesn't mean she can get away with trampling over people to get her own way does it?"
"Maybe she just needs a good, solid man to ground her a little, bring her back to earth a bit?" Paul smirked.
"Go for it man, good luck to you. Last fella she had probably still needs therapy."
"Oh I wasn't talking about me mate." Cillian looked at him suspiciously.
"What?"
"Oh for fucks sake Cillian, when was your last eye test? Can you not see what's clear as daylight, right in front of you??" Cillian's eyes widened, not understanding a word coming out of Paul's mouth.
"You've lost me."
"Wonder if she's part Irish. Or wants to be...." Cillian's face contorted.
"Don't use that line it's fucking cheesy... Never works either. What's your point?"
"Mate if you don't get in there quick, she's gonna lose interest and Finn will be at it like a shot!"
"You're having a laugh aren't you? I'm not even remotely interested!"
"Uh huh. Okay. Just don't say I didn't warn you eh?" Paul put his baseball cap on and headed out the door, still with a smirk on his face. Cillian took a seat on the sofa and ran his fingers through what was left of his hair, rolling his eyes. Yes, Natalie was fucking hot... But my god was she challenging.
Throwing that cup today was one thing. Telling the director she didn't like her character was another. Her original character was supposed to be Tommy's new 'plaything' behind Lizzie's back, but Natalie had apparently requested a change of direction - she wanted to be Arthur's new love interest, nothing to do with Tommy at all. That confused Cillian, and he'd had to think back to see if he'd ever worked with her in the past, obviously he'd pissed her off at some stage, why else would being his onscreen love interest be so repulsive to her that she demanded an entire script change?
Heading into the bathroom, he glanced at himself in the mirror. He wasn't exactly repulsive, surely? Yes he had a few more wrinkles now that he did in series one, but he was nearly 45 now...
He shook his head quickly - why did it even bother him whether she found him attractive or not?? She was 32, not that much younger than him but still way out of his league, and to top it off she was a fucking nightmare!
But those legs... Her eyes... Her lips... He couldn't help himself imagining those lips wrapped around his cock when he lay in bed in his Manchester apartment alone at night... Without thinking he found himself palming the growing erection under his jeans, feeling that familiar stirring in his groin. Shaking his head quickly, he splashed his face with cold water and rearranged himself in his jeans, calming himself down before he embarrassed himself. Once his erection had gone down, he headed back out of the trailer and over to his hire car, the driver ready and waiting to take him back to the apartment block.
Natalie opened her apartment door and crashed onto the sofa, exhausted. A full week of intense filming, she was more than ready for a soak in the bath and a glass of Shiraz. Opening the cupboard in the kitchen area she groaned - no wine. She also remembered the bubble bath she'd bought, and subsequently left in her trailer back on set...
She fished around in her bag for her room key again, and bit her lip. She knew exactly who would have a bottle of bubble bath... She groaned to herself, having successfully avoided him up until now but her aching limbs were crying out for some Radox. She left her apartment and knocked on the door across the hall.
Cillian answered a few minutes later with just a towel wrapped around his waist and his hair wet.
"Erm... Hey?" He asked, not opening the door fully, more hiding himself behind it.
"Okay um, this is random I know, but I was just wondering if maybe you had any bubble bath going spare? Please?"
"Really?" He laughed.
"Is it so surprising to you that a girl likes a bath now and again?"
"No actually, what's surprising is that you actually have manners."
"I beg your pardon?"
"You said 'please'. Didn't think you had it in you."
"Listen, you either have bubble bath spare, or you don't, it's a simple fucking question Cillian."
"Those tactics won't work with me love." Cillian
"Forget it, for fucks sake..." She turned to leave, rolling her eyes.
"Wait.. yes I have spare. Come in, I'll grab it for you." He pushed the door open so Natalie could walk inside, before heading into the bathroom. Coming back out with his jeans on, she couldn't help but be drawn to his toned chest and biceps, his upper body still damp from his own bath moments before she'd disturbed him.
Cillian caught her checking him out and smirked a little, handing over the bottle of Radox. She took it, smiling a touch herself.
"You smile too." She lowered her eyes and tried to hide the grin on her face. "You're not as hard faced as you try and make out, are you?" His arms were folded across his chest now, leaning against the kitchen counter.
Her eyes suddenly watered, and she bit her lip. Cillian frowned watching her well up and instinctively moved closer, taking her shoulders into his hands.
"Hey now... I didn't mean to upset you..."
"No... No I deserved it. God I'm so sick of this!"
"Sick of what?"
"I have this reputation of being a diva... With my career... I just like things to be perfect and when they're not I can lose my temper so quickly and it's fucking horrible and I make people hate me!" She choked back a sob, and Cillian pulled her into his arms, holding her as her shoulders shook.
"We all like things to be perfect Nat, but life doesn't work out like a fairytale, things just go wrong and that's okay?"
"I know, and I always feel so fucking guilty afterwards.. I can't stop now - my reputation is the only thing keeping me in the press, keeping me relevant..."
"You're kidding, right? So all this bitchiness, the demanding ways - it's an act?"
"Some of my best work has been off camera Cill." He couldn't help but laugh. He opened the cupboard and pulled out two small glasses, followed by a bottle of Irish Whiskey. Offering Nat one, she nodded, and they both moved into the lounge area.
They talked for a while - comparing stories of Hollywood, other actors they'd worked with, before Cillian cleared his throat. He needed to know the truth about her changing the script to be Arthur's love interest rather than Tommy's, and now she'd sank a few whiskeys, she was probably loose enough to tell him straight.
She hung her head, embarrassed. She knew he'd probably find out eventually, being one of the producers, but she hoped if she avoided him long enough she'd never need to reveal the truth to him.
"I also turned down Inception. And they offered me Thandie Newton's role in The Retreat."
"Okay..."
"I turned them all down when I found out you were in them."
"Ouch!" He chuckled nervously, "I don't think I want to ask why!"
"Because.. and this is awkward so don't laugh yeah?" He nodded as a promise not to, but his eyes widened when she revealed the truth. "Because I've had a crush on you since I was a teenager... And I didn't wanna make it awkward but I guess I just kinda did.."
Cillian was stunned into silence for a minute, or five. His silence made her nervous, and she pulled herself off the sofa to head out, realising how much of a fool she'd made herself. Making a mental note to blame the whiskey in the morning, she stood up, only to feel his hands suddenly on her waist as he stood up next to her.
"So that's why you didn't want to play Tommy's love interest, huh?" He held her in front of him, his hands squeezing her hips as he pulled her closer.
"Would've been too awkward.. for me at least.." closer still, their faces now inches apart.
"Does this feel awkward?" Their bodies met, her heart pounding in her chest. She could feel how aroused he was, pressed up against her, making her breathing heavier.
"No..." He leaned down, pressing his lips gently against hers, just ghosting over them.
"And this?" He whispered, his hands moving up, not quite over her breasts, just underneath them and round her lower ribs. She couldn't speak, just shook her head. Her breath hitching in her throat as a hand snaked back down, under her leggings and underwear, softly caressing her inner thigh and mound. Cillian glanced at her, her eyes closed and breathing deepening as his fingers traced her core, pushing a finger inside her to feel how much she was throbbing for him.
"Want me to help you with that?" She nodded again, and felt his fingers probe her, moving up slightly to brush against her clit making her hips grind against him and her fingers press into his biceps. His fingers moved slowly, circling the small bud.
"That feels good...." She panted, rocking her hips to ride his fingers, needing more.
He responded by moving his fingers quicker, pushing the small button harder. Her head fell against his chest and she groaned, her orgasm coming quickly.
"Gonna make a mess on my fingers, Nat?" He whispered in her ear, her breath coming in short bursts now. His other hand moved to her hair, pulling the bobble from it and letting it fall down her back, running his fingers through and tugging it to pull her head back. His lips on her neck, biting and sucking at the skin. Her hand resting on his arm, keeping him in place as he fingered her.
"Don't stop... Don't stop... Faster..." She gasped, and he happily complied. Rubbing her clit hard now under her clothing.
"Make a mess on me, cum for me..." She came with a force she'd never felt before, gripping onto his arms and holding his arm steady, riding her hips against his hand as her orgasm began to subside. He gave her a few minutes to catch her breath before pulling his hand away, bringing his fingers to his lips to taste her, groaning at the sweetness and pressing his lips against hers.
Bringing her close again, he backed her up until her calves hit the sofa, before laying her against the cushions and pulling her leggings down, her underwear with them. She spread her legs, biting her lip as his mouth kissed up her thighs.
"You want me to fuck you, Nat?" He lifted her t shirt over her head, her body completely bare now as she nodded.
Her fingers pulled at his jeans, and he unfastened them, easing his erection out before allowing them to fall to the floor, kicking them across the room. Natalie pushed him onto the sofa, sitting up against the cushions before straddling him, his hard cock now pressed against her soaked core.
"I'm gonna fuck you, that okay?" She smiled, her forehead pressed against his as she sunk down on his length, gasping at the sensation of being completely filled by the man she had fantasised about for years. His hands moved to her hips, before she moved them, putting them behind his head, taking full control. He smirked, before his mouth fell open - her hips riding him felt incredible. Pulling her body up, keeping the tip inside, she bounced gently, teasing him. Sinking down on him again, only to repeat the process. His legs were shaking from the sensations.
"Don't tease me, ride me." His blue eyes were like ice, and Nat sunk down so he was fully sheathed before moving her hips back and forth. She released his hands and gripped onto his shoulders for leverage, arching her body backwards slightly so his cock hit against her g spot deep inside her. One of his hands moved to her ass cheek, the other to one of her breasts, both of them squeezing and kneading at the flesh as her body grinded against him.
The hand on her ass moved round to circle her still sensitive clit, making her hips jerk faster.
"Cillian.... Cillian...." Her breathy moans of his name, the way her pussy clamped him, claiming him completely, the feel of her firm breast in his hand, the way her eyes fluttered closed as her orgasm approached... She was intoxicating.
"Baby.. I'm close..." He groaned, feeling that burning coil in his abdomen.
"Me too... I'm on the pill..." He grinned and held her hips still, pounding his hips up hard from underneath her. He had to cover her mouth to silence her loud screams, careful not to alert Paul in the next apartment. That only seemed to turn her on more, and she took two of his fingers into her mouth, sucking them, still tasting herself on them from earlier. The hand on her ass slapped it and squeezed it hard in response, making her cry out.
"That's it... Good girl... Fuck, I'm gonna cum..." Her orgasm flowed from her at his words, and she felt him shoot several streams of hot cum deep inside her as her walls clenched around him, milking him for all he had to give her.
Their foreheads pressed together again, both panting as they rode out the waves of pleasure.
"Does that live up to your fantasy?" He chuckled, groaning a little as she gave him a final clench of her walls.
"More than... Fuck that was incredible..." She gasped, gently rocking against him, not wanting him to leave her body just yet. She could feel him hardening again, in fact she wasn't sure he even softened.
"Don't stop, keep moving... Nice and slow.. Just like that..." He helped her hips move slowly, riding him gently.
"You're insatiable, aren't you..." She groaned.
"You feel too good wrapped around me, full of my cum deep inside you... You gonna let me fill you up again yeah?" She didn't answer, instead just allowed him to move her against him. He brought her hand down to rub her clit, needing to feel her cum again. She circled the bud gently at first, then feeling his cock start to twitch inside her she picked up the pace. He suddenly moved them so she was underneath him, his hips pistoning into her as he bent his head down to watch her fingers pleasuring herself.
"I'm gonna cum, Cillian...."
"I'm right there with you, come on..." A deep groan from both of them as they came together, him filling her up for the second time.
His body fell against hers as she held his shoulders, his face buried in her neck lightly caressing the skin with the tip of his nose.
"Fuck... Natalie... I haven't been able to do that for years," he laughed, hissing slightly pulling his sensitive cock out of her. Their mixed juices flowing from her onto the sofa cushion.
"I only came over for bubble bath.." she chuckled, her head laid back against the arm of the sofa as she caught her breath.
"My bath's probably still warm, might as well jump in with me?" He offered.
"No funny business in there, I think I need a breather..."
"Better make it a quick bath then. You're not leaving this apartment tonight. Or this weekend, in fact."
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𝐓𝐢𝐭𝐥𝐞: 𝘜𝘯𝘦𝘹𝘱𝘦𝘤𝘵𝘦𝘥.
𝐃𝐞𝐬𝐜𝐫𝐢𝐩𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧: [Name] and Jean lose themselves in an unexpectedly tender moment, right in the heat of summer...
𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐂𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 3.9k
𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: Praise kink, Sex, Soft Sex, Injured Jean, Creampie.
"Owwww fuck [name]!" You gasp in horror as you see a dark red shadow bleeding through the arm on Jeans shirt, blood dripping from his upper arm. From the pressure of you falling clumsily down of the tree, via your ODM, you've sliced all up his arm in your path.
"Fuck Jean I'm so so so so sorry! Does it hurt?!"
"Ahh of course." he says pretending to be mad for a moment.
"But it's fine idiot, you better be the one to patch me back up when we get back though. You know all things considered..."
You felt super guilty, he was wincing slightly and it looked painful to, you lean against him and wrap your arms around his torso, muttering a string of sorrys, his eyes soften as he looks down at you and sees how worried you are, but of course he has to tease you some more.
"She's a menace Captain!" he yells over to Captain Levi, who sighs and shakes his head at you both, while Hange laughs.
"I'm sorry." you say again for the umpteenth time.
"And I promise I will take full care of you when we get back....princess." you laugh, leaning up and flicking his forehead playfully.
"Are they?-" asks Levi to Hange, watching this display, as Eren, Armin, Mikasa, Connie and Sasha watch and laugh at the two of you.
"Nah it's just, them." chuckles Eren.
"I don't think it's anything romantic, but I know you've been giving them our good pencils Moblit!" says Hange they all laugh as he shakes his head and smiles.
"But they both enjoy drawing together, it's sweet."
"You done scowling now Horseface?" you nudge, still leaning against his chest.
"You're going to make it up to me...so yes." he leans down and whispers sexily in your ear, the base of his voice causing a throb between your legs to emerge, his hand tracing down to the small of your back, teasingly close your ass.
"Erm y-yeah I said I would." you say back nervously, in all honesty, were you attracted to Jean? Yes. We're you a little in love with him? Spending hours sketching together until sunset...sketching each other, talking, laughing, sharing secrets.
Yes.
But is he really saying what you think he is?
"No I mean..." He leans and whispers into your ear once more, you chomp your teeth down onto your bottom lip, crossing your thighs together, gripping his torso tighter, he looks down and smirks slightly seeing you flustered.
"Gimme one of your pencils and I'll really forgive you.”
"You asshole." you laugh pulling away from him and pushing him slightly, your cheeks blushing bright red from what you thought he was implying. He grabs his arm and whimpers out an exaggerated ouch-
"Ugh fine I'll think about it." you sigh, as you both walk over to your horses.
*****************
When you get back you both go straight to Jeans room.
"Fucking hell it's hot in here." you moan as he pushes open the door and you enter. The room is so full of his scent though, so it makes up for it.
"Ahhh I know right, it's the worst in the summer."
"Mmm I can imagine." you agree, going over to his desk and hovering your hands over his drawings.
"So...you gonna patch me up then-bully."
"Well I dragged your whiny ass here didn't I? Sit down over there then."
He sits crossed legged on his floor and you join him, setting down the first aid supplies you'd grabbed from the infirmary.
"Well take your shirt off." You feel yourself blushing, but try to shake it off. He looks at your shirt as he removes his, it's covered in blood and lightly damp from the summer heat, it looks uncomfortable and tight.
"Little help?" You swallow the lump in your throat and lean over and help him pull it off his slightly injured arm, he winces as you do it until you finally tug it off, your eyes casting over his frame and latching onto his perfect muscly form.
Fuck.
His chest -perfectly toned, his skin golden, soft,and silky and glistening-
"[Name], it is hot as fuck in here, you should take yours off to, if you want to." he says gently, but with a slight smirk.
Huhhhh?
"Ahh piss off I know I look sweaty okay. But ahhh Jean it's because your so hot." you laugh sarcastically, earning a chuckle from him, you both often joke like this, but the sexual tension in the room is growing shamelessly thick, and fast.
She looks hot.
"Well I'm not gonna be the only one this vulnerable [name]." he chuckles punching your shoulder with his good arm playfully.
He senses your stalling, "But of course if you don't want to I won't force you or anything stupid." He says softly, changing his tone.
"Ahh don't be silly." you say, your heart melting at him, what was the harm you are seriously hot, you remove your white shirt and reveal your skin under it, you watch as his jaw clenches. His eyes try to discreetly scan you but fail, his eyes plastered to your breasts in your rosy coloured bra, your skin looks so soft he wants to kiss it-explore it-
"Gawp much horse boy!" you tease, setting out the supplies and starting your first aid.
"Not every day I get a half-naked nurse what can I say." he winks grinning.
"You dick." you giggle, cleaning the cut and now beginning to sew it up.
"This is going to hurt but you're already doing so well okay." you soothe. He blushes as his eyes can't help but fixate on your half naked body, you look so good right now and he wants to take your bra of so bad.
"You're good at this." he gulps, feeling half of his dick beginning to harden, praying you won't notice it. You lean closer as you work, your boobs brushing his arm, making him let out a soft gasp.
"Ahh who knew you could be so nice." he blurts out, trying to distract himself from how turned on he's getting. You look up and glare at him and continue, he smiles looking at you, truthfully Jean had been in love with you for a while.
“All done." You smile, patting his leg gently, he almost looks disappointed?
"Ahh wait you're hairs a fucking mess. Ahh-" you say noticing his hairbrush on his drawers.
"Can I brush it?"
"Mmm.”
"Well I did tell you I was going to give you full princess treatment ay." you giggle, earning a sheepish smile from Jean.
He's being quiet for once?
You grab his hairbrush and sit kneeling in front of him, awkwardly leaning forwards to brush his hair, steadying yourself by resting a hand on his shoulder as your boobs bounce with every brush stroke, making his mind fill with dirty thoughts.
Fuck where do I look right now?
Did I just almost see her nipple? Fuck I'm too hard
"Hmm wait." He's sitting crossed legged so you get on his lap and straddle his thighs, you sit your crotch on top of his and feel his dick beneath you but ignore it, even as you rock back and forth against it as your body moves with every pass through his tawny brown locks. His teeth were fully gritted now, he was finding this really hard, feeling your warmth rub against him especially. And plus your boobs are literally in his face. Fuck fuck fuck.
He thought it couldn't get any worse you might definitely notice until-
"Oh my god [name] please not there.", he sighs,frowning and clamping his eyelids shut, like he was in pain. You'd placed your free hand on his inner inner thigh to steady yourself while you brushed through a particularly stubborn knot at the back of his hair.
"What? I'm just brushing your hair silly, hey I got knots to-" you say innocently before.
"Ohhhh." you both laugh, you could feel a huge boner under you now, poking against you, you rest your face against his chest, he looks so good right now, and you can feel the ripples and definition of his chest and stomach against yours and it's making you shiver. He reaches his hand out and strokes your hair as your breathing hitches against him, you wrap your arms around his torso and start to lightly stroke his back as you feel his soft breaths grazing your scalp as his chin rests in your hair.
"[Name]?”
"Mm?" you mumble pulling away and looking up at him, your cheeks are surely completely blushed right now, and you really didn't want him to see.
"You're so cute." he whispers, lightly lifting your face to his by your chin with a light pull of his finger.
"Don't mock me-" Your words are cut off when he reaches down and greets your lips, his lips are soft and make every part of your body tingle and ignite. He moves his face slowly with yours, allowing your tongues to knead together, his hand stroking tenderly at your cheek, as your lips said what your words couldn't.
You reach down and begin eagerly undoing his trousers.
'Mm wait." he pants, pulling away from the kiss, he reaches a hand around to your back and unclasps your bra, letting it fall down your torso before ripping the troublesome garment of both of your arms, and throwing it across the room triumphantly. He marvels at the sight before him,
"You're beautiful."
"Jean-"
His lips race to explore your pretty breasts-quieting you, your heart races as he kisses every part of skin on your chest, fondling your breasts, swirling his tongue around your nipples, sucking and kissing them. You let out soft little whimpers as he explores you, feeling his smirk against your chest.Your straddling thighs weaken and he gently pushes you down onto the floor, so his body is now towering above yours.
He follows down your torso with kisses, his hands grabbing on to your breasts, before pulling your trousers and underwear down and off.
He starts kissing upwards on your thighs, getting closer and closer, you feel a little self conscious and clamp your legs together, covering your face.
"No [name] let me make you feel good. Oh but I want to see you when i do though." he says sexily coming back up to your face and pinning your arms down and away your face, before kissing you again.
"Don't hide your face."
He follows back down and grabs on to your hips, wasting no time he runs a flattened tongue over your pussy.
"Damn." he groans, his eyes rolling back as he pulls away and sees a string of your clear slick wetness coming from your walls through his half lidded eyes.
"You're so sweet."
"Jean f-fuck." you moan.
"Yes that's it, moan for me." He dives his face back in between your legs, sucking at your clit powerfully grinning at your arching back, and your clenched fists finding refuge in his hair. He gets two of his fingers and massages them over your clit and opening while his tongue joins.
"Do you want me to put these in?" he grunts sexily.
"Yes-please." you pant back, he begins thrusting his fingers into you, they're so long and flexible and reach so far in they find your spot instantly. He uses them just right, the most perfect come hither motions stroking inside of you gently, while his mouth slurps and slips on your clit.
"Is this- feeling good for you?" he asks looking up at you, making you whimper seeing his face between your legs like this, his honey brown eyes looking up into yours.
"So good Jean- please don't stop."
"Oh I won't." he groans, lapping up more of your wetness with his tongue as he focuses on your clit and his fingers to bring you closer and closer to climax , until you clamp your thighs around him, your walls tightening around his fingers as you explode, feeling a rush of your warm cum melting down his fingers. You lay there breathless, your body lightly shaking from the intensity. He removes his fingers and sucks them clean, making you throb at the sight while he let out little mewls of satisfaction to your taste.
He looks up at you with his beautiful eyes again, you struggle to hold his gaze,
"You want more right? Cos I do." he smirks.
"Yeah I do." you blush reaching down to undo his trousers, he moves your hand away pinning it back above you.
"No no I mean, I want to do that again." he says softly, pushing you back down.
"Is that okay?" he asks glancing up at your confused and shocked expression.
"Mmhm." you nod biting down on your lip in anticipation.
"Then just sit back and relax okay." he smiles.
"But I want you to moan my name more this time please?
Can you do that?" he asks as he kisses at your inner thighs again, sucking lightly and leaving rosy flushed marks from his lips behind.
"Mmhm." you nod, rendered speechless, he grins at this and gets to work, lightly licking your clit with different motions, delighting as he pulls different sounds from you, mewls, moans, groans, pants, whimpers, cries.
"Jeannn." you whimper.
"Yes like that, good girl." he groans, running his face against your pussy, utilising his chin and his nose as well as his tongue, eating you with relish.
"Ohh and this time I want you to cum on my tongue so this might feel a little different."
These words go straight to your core, vibrating your pussy with their timbre, probably the hottest thing you never thought he'd say to you. He places two fingers on your clit and starts to rub them softly, while he fucks your opening with his tongue, sucking and stroking into your walls with his strong muscle determinedly, gasps and whimpers leaving your lips at the difference in sensation, he looks up and sees your face blown with pleasure and promptly quickens his pace.
"Ahh that feels good doesn't it?"
"Yesss." you practically shriek back.
"Then let me hear how good it feels." he moans, as he increases his pace even more, grabbing your hips tighter as he devours you.
"Jeannn."
"Louder."
"F-fuck Jean right there don't stop I'm gon-"
"Louder!”
"Jean!" you scream, as your entire body jolts with pleasure and you feel your orgasm pass through you from your toes to your ears, the sensations taking their time to scan through every part of you, from the careful build up of his motions. You'd never came like that before, you look down him, he's visibly breathless, he sticks his tongue out slightly to show you the glistening juices that cover it before he swallows them away and wipes the side of his lip with a grin of pride.
"Well I got my wish." he smirks.
He rips his trousers and boxers off, his huge cock springing out, you look at it in shock, it's the perfect size, pre cum is oozing from his tip and dribbling down tantalisingly over his veiny shaft.
Fuck.
You couldn't wait, you sit up and latch your lips on to it straight away, making his whole body lurch up in shock, his eyes widened at the sight of you kneeling in front of him as your head starts to bob up and down. You pass tight rings over him with your lips, at a strong pace, until you pop your lips over his head, stroking your thumb over his tip and offering him teasing licks to it, enhancing the little sensations for him. He groans at your every movement your name leaving his mouth in breathless fragments.
"Fuck [name]!"
"You're so good at this, this is the best I've ever-", you go just that little bit deeper, leaving him wordless.
"Don't hold back." you hum, feeling the vibrations against his tip make every nerve in his body sing.
He grabs on to your hair, as he sits up looking down at the side of your face, admiring how good you look sucking his cock as he sees it poke against your inner cheek, as you take him further and further. His hands pushing your face down to take him deeper and deeper.
You finally get over his full length and make deep deep passes, one after the other, each time hollowing your cheeks even tighter as his tip rests in your throat, groans and curses falling from his lips. The room filled with the sound of your light breaths, gags and soft moans- driving him wild.
"[Name] this is too good." he groans roughly, you smile up at him and go faster, using your hands along with your mouth, tugging at him with a perfect pressure while your mouth follows it with a mind blowing suction.
You go faster and faster his hand gripping into your hair with greater force as his hips lurch and twitch up eagerly to meet to your mouth, his hand in your hair suddenly pushes your head down hard choking you ,as he becomes dizzy and fixated on chasing his high, fucking your face and using you for his pleasure- and you love it.
You feel and hear him getting closer and closer above you, choked out groans of your name escaping his lips before-
"[Name]!" He releases his entire load into your mouth at once.
"Oh my god [name]. I'm so sorry-" he stops and watches in awe as you open up your mouth to show him the pool of cum resting on it, before swallowing it all.
"Don't worry, that's what I wanted." you grin.
"You taste good."
"You dirty girl." he smiles, snapping up and pinning you down by your arms again. Kissing and sucking all the sensitive parts of your neck, making you whimper under his lips.
"Would you like to fuck now?" he whispers in your ear slowly, making sure you heard every syllable.
"Yes." you moan, your voice raspy, making his cock twitch at such a sweet melody.
"Sit back, relax, and let me do all the work okay?" he whispers, gently yet firmly, pressing sweet kisses on your forehead and nose.
"Okay." you smile as he places a cute kiss to your brow bone.
He continues to relax your body as he kisses you, when he feels you calm beneath him, he grabs his shaft and begins to slide it up and down your pussy slowly, gathering up the slick wetness oozing out of you.
"I'm gonna start now okay?"
"Mm." you moan, feeling the head of his dick throbbing against you, dizzy with lust, he slowly pushes it up to your opening, gently pushing through and up into your walls, as he rolls his hips carefully and measuredly against you, kissing your collarbones as his length finally reaches and relaxes all the way inside you.
"How do I feel?" he groans deeply into your neck, as he lets out a deep breath that tickles your ear, making your head swim.
"Tell me."
"You feel so good Jean." you moan back dazedly, his words touching you just as much as his cock's ridges that are blessing and grazing all the right places against your throbbing walls.
"Am I good to move now?" he whispers, stroking your lip with his thumb, you nod and kiss his thumb to confirm.
And he starts to thrust deep and slow, every motion of his hips sending waves of deep pleasure through you, as his cock perfectly angles against the spongey spot inside you, with every stroke.
"Faster?" you whimper, wrapping your thighs around his torso moaning as you feel him get deeper, hooking your arms tightly around his neck to pull him closer.
"Look at me then [name]." he moans softly, placing his palm against your cheek and stroking your face as his thrusts get faster, causing you to moan his name over and over and over again and loving it. He looks down at your fluttering eyelids and your delicate face, watching your soft features fill contort with passion, as your boobs snap up and down to his rhythm,hitting against his chest, you are truly a sight to behold.
So beautiful-
"Your face...you're so sexy I can't believe I'm seeing you like this." he groans, every-time you moan out his name, he gets faster, his head now weakly dropping into the crook of your neck.
"Are you comfortable?"
"Yes, so give me more." you whisper, showering his neck with kisses, giving him the push he needed to go faster.
"This feels so good." you gasp.
He starts to buck his hips into you, latching his lips onto your shoulder and biting it softly while he drills into you, he's distributing his weight on you so perfectly, that his pelvis is rubbing and stimulating your clit with the same rhythm, the double stimulation making you claw at his back, and making him groan into you even more, your name falling from his lips in gratitude.
"[Name] you feel amazing."
You feel the pleasure building throughout your body, making your eyes roll back, he feels you tightening around him and lightly grabs your neck and starts to kiss you deeply and sloppily as you both near your end.
"You're taking it so well." he groans mid kiss.
"Jean I'm almost there." you moan into his lips.
"Don't worry, don't wait for me." he moans softly as he catches your bottom lip in his teeth and pulls it away gently, as you orgasm starts to blossom.Your walls clenching around his cock, as you start to lose it as you twitch beneath him, he watches in awe as you jolt and pant in pleasure below him, lost in complete bliss. Losing yourself in the moment and coming completely undone, he feels you release and tighten around him, bringing him even closer to his finish, as he watches in glee as you twitch in overstimulation, as he fucks you through your orgasm, prolonging your sweet pleasure.
"Ahhh beautiful." he moans into your neck as you feel him let go and cum inside you, it spills out as he slowly pulls out of you, the mixture of your juices falling from your twitching pussy and down your thighs. He rests down next to you and hooks an arm around your waist and chest and resting his chin against your nape, pulling you close into an embrace against his hot body.
"That was amazing and...unexpected." He smiles against your ear.
"It was." you reply, both of you breathless, some minutes pass by in each other's arms, and you manage to regain yourselves a bit more.
"Do only your best girls get fucked up there then?" you tease in laughter, pointing up at his bed.
"What the floor was fun, no?" he laughs back, attacking your neck with tickling kisses.
"Ahh it did the job." you giggle.
"We'll use it next time, but hey I deserve the praise! Not the floor, who just gave you the best time of your life with an injury?- ME." he smirks.
‘Next time’ you smile to yourself softly, containing your excitement-
"Yes Jean you did well." you mock, grinning at him.
"Cmon [name] say it like you mean it."
"How?"
"With your lips, like this, come here-"
MrsAckermanX 2021 ©
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The Pink Paradox
Written for the @drarrymicrofic prompt: Metamorphosis!
Rating: T
Length: 1.6k
Summary: Draco Malfoy has pink hair.
Notes: Thank you so much @fw00shy for betaing!! Also just hire me for all your graphic design needs because hot damn I am proud of myself
(i)
Draco Malfoy has pink hair.
That’s not entirely correct when one gets down to the facts. Draco Malfoy has blond hair— a light, airy blond, the color of sunlight on snow. Harry Potter knows this because he’s spent many an adolescent winter watching Malfoy walk the grounds of a frozen Hogwarts and noticing it. The fact that he’s observed Malfoy that carefully is neither here nor there, although Ron would say it’s there (there being the Janus Thickey Ward). Harry’s Malfoy-stalking tendencies occupy their own corner of his mind however, and certainly don’t apply to the here and now.
Because here and now Malfoy has pink hair, and that’s not something unique to Harry’s observations. There’s not a witch or wizard alive who wouldn’t notice that head of bubblegum bobbing between the Auror cubicles.
It’s far too early for a Monday morning (nearing noon), and while their coworkers have been diligently ridding the Wizarding World of crime, Harry and Ron are tossing Bertie Bott’s Every Flavor Beans into each other's mouths and gossiping over Lavender Brown’s pregnancy cravings. They were, that is, until Harry caught sight of Malfoy's pink hair.
“Kneazle got your tongue?” Ron asks after Harry fails to finish his sentence for the fifth time. Ron can make fun of him if he wants— his chair is facing away from Malfoy and that rosy fringe. The fact that Harry has never passed up a chance to watch Draco in all their years of training and employment (with or without pink hair) is irrelevant. The pink is distracting, and it’s more so on Malfoy.
“Malfoy,” Harry repeats to himself quietly, just to feel the familiar shape in his mouth. It’s lacking the venom and suspicion it should have on principle.
Ron turns unpleasantly green at that. “Malfoy’s got your tongue?” he asks.
“What?” Harry finally looks away from Malfoy. “No. Ew. Of course not.” He says it far too blandly, like a child denying their love of sweets, and Ron gives him a Look. Harry tries (unsuccessfully) to change the subject. “What’s he doing with the— why did he— what’s… erm.”
Ron regards him like he’s lost his mind. He seems to think Harry is confused about Malfoy’s business in the DMLE, when he’s usually with Hermione down in Mysteries. While that is out of the ordinary, it’s not nearly as pressing of an issue as Malfoy's pink hair.
“He’s consulting,” Ron explains slowly, “for the Finley case?” Then, when Harry only stares back blankly— “Harry. Can you even read?”
“Occasionally.”
“Tacky romance novels don't count.”
“Oh. Then, no, not really.”
“It was in our missive just last week. They’ve pulled in the Unspeakables. I was hoping they’d send ‘Mione, since she and the Ferret work together, but no such luck.”
“Oh.” Harry turns back to watch Malfoy shake Robards’ hand. Robards' grip is strong, and his thick fingers nearly engulf Malfoy’s delicate wrist. Harry doesn’t like that.
“Are you worried he’s going to cause trouble?” Ron asks. His voice sounds different, and when Harry glances at him again he’s got both feet slung over the armrest of his chair. Robards will skin him alive if he sees.
“No!” Harry says too quickly. He coughs. “Just wondering about the— er, how long has he had…?”
Ron doesn’t seem inclined to help him out.
“For fuck’s sake, Ron, when did he go and do—” Harry waves his hands frantically “—that?”
“Do you mean the hair, mate?”
“Yes, the bloody hair!” Harry’s had his fair share of existential crises in his life. He’s well acquainted with the feeling, and this one is going near the top of the list.
Ron, the bastard, shrugs. Shrugs! Like a pink-haired Malfoy is not only a normal occurrence, but is even expected.
“I didn’t notice it at first, to be honest,” he says, and Harry throws him a look of such vicious resentment that the potted Dragon Snap in the corner stops smoking and curls its leaves over its head. Ron just gives him a shit-eating grin in return.
Discouraged by his apparently un-threatening aura, Harry glances away in time to see Malfoy get a hearty pat on the shoulder (he doesn’t like that, either) and turn towards— towards them.
“Er, Ron?” Harry asks. “Who was assigned to the Finley case?” He knows the answer before he gets it, but still can’t look away from the cutting figure Malfoy makes as he saunters towards them in swirling black robes.
“That would be us,” Ron says cheerfully. “Buckle up and tuck in, mate. Your hard-on is showing.”
Harry is not hard, not even a little, but his panicked struggle to tug the mercilessly short Auror robes over his lap leaves him wrinkled and guilty-looking when Malfoy reaches them.
“Gentlemen,” Malfoy says cooly, and Harry thinks his cheeks must be the color of Malfoy’s hair.
“Harry’s hot for your hair,” Ron says. Harry chokes. “He’s also not read the case file, so I’ll leave you two to it. Don’t come looking for me, I’ll be taking an extended lunch. Looking forward to working with you.”
He throws them both a saucy wink and leaves with all the smugness of a man who’s done his yearly good deed. Harry’s going to murder him before the day is done.
Silence descends over their cubicle. Malfoy eyes Ron’s chair, but wisely chooses to remain standing. Harry notices belatedly that his robes are trimmed in silver, the same shade at his eyes.
“Potter.”
“Malfoy,” Harry acknowledges with a polite nod. The stillness around them is most certainly plummeting towards awkward.
“I heard you like my—”
“Have you read the—”
They both speak at the same time. Malfoy blinks, startled. When he doesn’t finish his sentence, Harry tries again.
“Have you not been debriefed on—”
“I noticed you changed your—”
They wisely decide to shut up. There’s a used staple on the corner of Harry’s desk, and he reaches over to fiddle with it just for something to do.
“Staples,” Malfoy says out of the blue. He looks like he regrets his volume, and it occurs to Harry that he probably feels just as uncomfortable. This is the first time they’ve spoken beyond polite greetings in four years, and neither is sure what to expect. It makes Harry feel better, somehow, to know that he’s not the only one feeling utterly wrongfooted.
“Yes,” Harry says. “Staples?”
Malfoy swallows. His neck is a long expanse of smooth skin, and Harry vaguely wonders what it tastes like. “We might make use of them on the case. Staples, I mean. Have you any more?”
Harry frowns, his discomfort dissipating. “Yeah, in the supply closet. But we just use Sticking Charms— don’t you?”
“Yes,” Malfoy says quickly. “We do. But we could try staples from the supply closet.”
It’s Harry’s turn to deploy the Look. Malfoy frowns at him like he doesn't get it, but Harry’s not really in the mood for deduction.
“So,” Harry says instead, “Auror work. Are you looking forward to it?”
There’s a shift in Malfoy’s stance, and his grey eyes skim over the lines of Harry’s body. “Parts of it,” he says. His tone is a little off. Husky.
“Sore throat?” Harry asks in what he hopes is a sympathetic manner.
“Sometimes,” Malfoy says cryptically. Harry’s not having the greatest time puzzling out his strange behavior and responses— they leave him floundering for something else to say.
“Are you going to tell me what’s in that fancy file or do I have to read it?” Harry finally asks, jerking his chin towards the papers tucked under Malfoy’s arm. He sincerely hopes Malfoy will volunteer to summarize for him. It’s because Harry’s glasses are giving him a headache and not at all because he likes the sound of Malfoy’s voice.
Malfoy’s cheeks flush a little. Harry wonders if he’s coming down with something, even as he struggles not to think of the color as attractive. “Protocol dictates that you read case information yourself,” Malfoy says, “but I suppose I wouldn’t mind speeding things along so we can get started. Maybe… over coffee? Or lunch?”
Harry tries not to let his dismay show on his face. “We have to work through lunch?” he asks. It sounds pathetic even to his own ears.
“Oh my fucking Merlin, he’s asking you out!” Cho shouts over the cubicle wall. Harry and Malfoy both jump.
“No, he’s not!” Harry shouts back, cheeks flaming.
“Yes, I am,” Malfoy says. Harry drops the used staple.
“You are?”
“Am I?”
“I don’t bloody know!”
“Well,” Malfoy starts, but seems to realize he doesn’t have a leg to stand on. “Well— you like my hair.”
“And that’s enough reason to ask me out for coffee?”
Harry really has no idea why he’s arguing. This is Malfoy— pink-haired, blushing Malfoy— handing himself over on a silver-trimmed platter, and he mentally slaps himself for putting up any sort of resistance.
“I like your hair,” Malfoy admits. He seems to regret saying it, and tries to make up for his embarrassment by adopting a suave position leaning against Harry’s desk. He misses and stumbles slightly before righting himself.
“Don’t worry, Malfoy,” Cho calls again. “He’s been wetting himself over you for years, he’s bound to say yes.”
“Well, he’s not saying it,” Malfoy mutters.
“Yes I am.”
“You— you are?”
“Am I?”
Malfoy stops and stares at him. Opens his mouth, frowns a little. There’s a wonderful feeling in Harry’s chest.
“I’m just fucking with you,” Harry says over a smile. “Let’s go.”
Malfoy orders a strawberry milkshake at lunch. Harry doesn’t get dessert, but he still feels very… pink.
Read on Ao3
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Hiii how are you love, enyways I wanted to see if I could request a Fred Weasley x reader where Reader has been busy or whatever and Fred feels left out or something like that and its really cute and fluffy. If you don't want to do it you don't have too, no worries. Lots of love💕
Yes of course, dear! Hope it’s okay🖤
Ambulo Aqua
Fred Weasley x Reader (female/male/gender neutral)
Content: Fluff💕
Word count: 1203 *walk on water
You felt guilty, in all honesty, for all the time you’d been missing with Fred. He hadn’t said anything to you about it directly, but every meal you were late to in the Great Hall, you could see the disappointment settled in his eyes. No one was pointing fingers but you obviously knew this was your doing even though you’d both had a stable conversation about it. He knew how much your work for justice meant to you and when Dumbledore had assigned you extra jobs for the Order of the Phoenix, Fred was the first one to encourage you. He’d even held a little midday picnic for you, followed by some energetic broom chasing and races. He was always so thoughtful, but thinking about that now made your heart sting. You knew you had to apologize for the past few weeks and knowing Fred and how sensitive he could be, you had to make it playful.
----------
“Hey Freddie,” you greeted him excitedly outside of his potions class. He seemed to be in a daze, mostly from having been in a class with Snape and seeing you waiting. It had been weeks since you’d walked together to any class like you used to do, now you had only been able to catch glimpses of a sulking Fred in the distance.
“Y/N? Wha- what are you doing here? Didn't Dumbledore send you off to Godric's Hollow?” he seemed exasperated, trying to make sense of your presence before him, making you laugh but you stopped as soon as he met your gaze with a hurtful expression. There were a few minutes of silence between you two, weird eye contact exchanged and the opening of mouths to speak sentences that were never spoken in the end.
“Sorry erm,” you stuttered, not expecting this confrontation to be as awkward as it was turning out to be, “He did but I talked to him and he’s agreed to give me a few weeks off, with the O.W.Ls coming up and everything. Anyway I was thinking that we could go out and enjoy the rest of the day together,” you suggested, reaching for his hand, knowing how he loved the way your tiny one fit in his perfectly. Fred just sighed, looking down at his shoes, scuffing them occasionally.
“I don’t know, Y/N. I haven’t really seen much of you until now and it’s all a bit sudden don’t you think?” Your heart sank when you heard him say that but you gave him the chance to explain himself. “I’ve just missed you so much and I know, I know it’s not your fault you’re away so much. And I’m happy for you, I truly am but just not seeing you has been extra shitty this time around.” He held your hand tighter as he spoke.
“Oh Freddie,” you cooed, embracing him right as the last word had left his mouth, “I’ve missed you just as much and missing all this time with you has been really eating me away. You’re my biggest supporter with everything and even though I haven’t been able to show you that recently or make time, doesn’t mean that I’ll ever stop feeling that. I love you, Fredrick,” you smiled at the way his name made him laugh.
“I love you too, Y/N, so much. I’m so immensely proud of you, you know?” he said, booping your nose, as he gazed down at you with the biggest smile. You knew all had been forgiven, finally happy to have your boyfriend/partner back to his usual self.
Fred brushed a strand of hair out of your eyes, “So, what does my little prankster have in mind for today?” he asked, raising an eyebrow playfully at you. You giggled, he knew you so well, and you knew him too well.
“Wellll….” you pulled him behind you, leading you both outside to the courtyard, finding your way to the bench where you’d both had your first few conversations and prank wars, “I snagged a few potions from Snape.” You saw his eyes widening mischievously, his lips tugging at the corners into his signature smirk.
“Fuck, I love you,” he laughed, kissing your forehead. You felt his lips against your temple as he asked you what kind of potions you’d stolen, sending a round of shivers throughout your body.
“Ambulo aqua*,” you replied, stroking his red hair, tracing your hands around his face and jaw. Fred stood up, extending his hand towards your seated figure, “What’re we waiting for then, hm? Let’s go run on some fucking water, love!”
-----------
The potion took a few minutes to take effect, in the meantime Fred had taken off your sweater, socks, and shoes, leaving you only in your dress (or jeans w top). You’d done the same to him, his striped shirt showing his muscular arms.
“I think it’s safe to go across, don’t you think?” he nudged you to face the Black Lake. You looked up and met his playful eyes, imagining Fred falling into the water for not having waited long enough.
You took his hand in yours, facing him, “Let’s do it.”
You both took a few tentative steps to the shore of the lake, not sure who was going to step first. Fred laughed, teasing you for being scared of getting wet, so you took the first step, naturally.
Your foot pressed itself against the dark water below, you gasped at how light the water below you felt, it was as if a thin layer of glass had appeared underneath you. Taking a few more steps, you took off running towards the middle of the body of water, “Catch me if you can!” you shouted at Fred who was still waiting at the water’s edge. The wind played with your hair as you ran forward, extending your arms to the sun above you, laughing as you spun around on your toes. The cool air nipped at your nose and cheeks, you were sure they were red now but you didn’t care. You saw Fred running towards you from the corner of your eye as you screamed, trying to run away from him before he caught up to you but it was too late, he had you in his arms, thrown over his shoulder in a blur of seconds.
“Fred!” you protested, slapping his back as he continued to carry you, “I want to walk!”
“Says the one who lured me in with that dare. I caught you and now you’re all mine,” he snickered, finally setting you back down on your feet, but his hands never leaving your hips, your bodies pressed against each other.
There you both stood, in the middle of the Black Lake, embracing under the dimming sun. “I’ll always be yours, Weasley,” you told him. You felt yourself falling in love all over again with him. Not a day went by that Fred hadn’t made you laugh or feel excited for the days to come with him.
“Forever,” he murmured, bringing his lips down to yours, a smile always tugging on his lips as they met yours. He was all yours, he’d always been and he’d forever be.
#ginny weasley smut#hp imagine#fred weasly x reader#fred and goerge weasley#harry potter#hp#hp smut#fred weasley fluff#hp fluff#hogwarts#luna lovegood#blaise zabini#blaise x y/n#blaise x reader#draco x y/n#fred fluff#weasley family
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love ur shinaya breakup tbh read all of it and it's honestly accurate i think the screaming match isnt necessarily ooc bc ayano has the capacity to get ANGRY and yell honestly i think it would be more like shintaro raises his voice and then ayano snaps and starts screaming and shintaro instantly is like O_O kind of just freezes bc THIS isnt the ayano he knows (the one he usually sees/i feel like he would know that this part of ayano is a real part of her but he doesnt like it bc some part of him still relies on her to be the usual "ayano" as a form of consistency in his life especially post str bc if ayano acts like ayano then that means things r okay and normal and he doesnt have to think abt the timelines where ayano died and STAYED dead and also specifically ayak) he doesnt know how to deal with that rn so after a bit of being yelled at he basically stops talking and ayano is like WHY ARENT U SAYING ANYTHING and shintaro is just like ermmm well uhmmm which pisses off ayano even more she just starts crying bc she's so overwhelmed and doesnt know what to do with herself anymore and shintaro is awkwardly standing there and then they just dont talk abt it or breaking up but they basically break up after that erm sorry for the long ask
YES YES YES YES YES YES YES god this ask made me so excited i fell off my chair no joke. bc i was reading and i was agreeing so hard i was excited. and i um fell off my chair.
IM GONNA BE HONEST I SAID "OOC" AS SORT OF A DISCLAIMER BC ITS KINDA A HOT TAKE IG.... i was like (looks around) i dont wanna be called out or something. but to me its totally in character. i mean ayano gets angry in canon. i love that its canon that she really plays the nice girl role in front of shintaro (and haruka&takane) but at home with mekatrio we see her a lot more vulnerable/able to be angry.
the way i imagine them is usually ayano ending in tears most of the time but when They Break Up like for realsies it's when ayano is just PISSED. shitshow gone too far mode. and i think it starts off from something completely stupid like always, something casual abt WHY WONT U HOLD MY HAND IN PUBLIC!! like something totally idiotic but like i said in the other ask its just all these bottled up emotions and eventually ayano just fucking explodes lmao. shintaro is totally shocked like u say but i think it's such a relief for him somehow because this is it. THIS is what he deserved all along. THIS is what he's been searching for. ayano being mad at him. ayano making him pay for everything. and he's like YEAH!! YELL AT ME MORE!! I DESERVE IT!!! I CAN FINALLY MAKE THINGS UP TO YOU IF UR ANGRY. and that pisses ayano off even more because WHAT are you talking about??? since when is this about what u deserve?? since when am i some sort of trophy wife you feel guilty for having??? i dont want that!! have you been doing this on purpose!?!?!?!? and she DUMPS HIS ASS
everytime theyve broken up before (on and off slay) it's by shintaro and ayano ends in dramatic tears while shintaro is just like angrily pacing around his room. when AYANO dumps him this time and for good, shintaro is in tears. he's such a mess. takane who's been comforting ayano each and every single time shintaro has made her cry and per her request playing this crazy relationship therapist, goes to her fully intending to do it again. like fully intending to comfort her and talk some sense into her thinking theyre just gonna get back together like always. but this time ayano isn't crying at all, she just breathes in relief and talks about the huge weight she got off her back. and takane's like ...ohhh... this time it's different.
usually, the procedure would be ayano sobbing to takane BWAA PLEASE TALK TO HIM and then takane going to yell at shintaro but this time it's SHINTARO who's like. PLEASE IM BEGGING YOU TALK TO HER.
shintaro on the other hand is such a mess. sorry to bring takane into everything💖 but having him sob in her arms is like the icing on the cake bc his thing with her is not THE problem but one of the (many) problems and shintaro REALLY doesn't learn. he is despaired over ayano and crying on takane again, just like back then. and he loves it in an insane way. because this is so comfortable. this is familiar. it is so so painful. he is so heartbroken but it is so familiar. its not more painful than having ayano by his side because ayano's company terrifies him. her survival is one in its kind in all the timelines, and it has been so terrifying to see something new after seeing the same for so long. especially because the something new is her going out with him of all things?? he has so much regret and self loathing and guilt and FEAR OF LOSING EVERYTHING BC NOW ITS NEW AND IT'S NEVER BEEN NEW AND THAT'S SO SCARY to work through that he cannot enjoy it, he's terrified of it instead and acted the way he did essentially so it'd end the way it'd end. and yeah he's whining about wanting her back and he really does but it's like... you know, the same as back then. lol.
so like ayano, he is also relieved. but in totally different ways. does that make sense. erm. hehe
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serendipity
summary: spencer cannot wait to propose, but you accidentally beat him to it (spencer reid x fem!reader)
word count: 5k
warnings: some language! some minor angst!
author’s note: this is 100% based on one of my favorite episodes of new girl (google doc name is winston bishop type shit), also this is mega self-indulgent so if u don’t like dinosaurs and/or ferns i’m sorry :/
You let out a satisfied hum. Everything was quite nearly perfect. Presently, you were sitting on a bench next to the little duck pond in the park by your apartment, and you watched as tendrils of the weeping willow grazed the surface, sending gentle ripples across the water. It seemed to glow in the dappled sunlight. An adorable duck family was nestled into some of the reeds, and your heart was happy as you watched the mother tending to her ducklings. This was your favorite spot in the entire city.
“Hey, Spence?” Your head rested on his shoulder as he read one of the Ray Bradbury novels that he loved dearly. You weren���t sure which one he was on now; he’d been determined to read his entire collection this weekend and had been flying through.
“Yes, dear?” His eyes didn’t leave the pages, but you didn’t mind.
“What do you call a group of ducks?”
“There’s a couple names actually. It can be called a raft, team, or paddling; it’s a matter of preference.” Finally, he shifted his gaze toward you, and he couldn’t help the smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. The flush of your cheeks and the wisps of your hair, he was so incredibly enamored, he loved you so much. And he was so excited to let you know so soon, but not quite yet.
“I think I like paddling.”
“Yeah, me too.” Shutting his eyes to revel in this moment, he pressed a kiss to the crown of your head.
“Hey, Spence?”
“Yes, dear?”
“Do you wanna get married?”
What.
Spencer floundered in the absolute contradiction of feelings that he found himself submerged in in that moment. Ice flooded his veins, and his face heated. His blood pressure skyrocketed, and oh God, it’s not supposed to happen like this. Yes, he loves her terribly, and yes, he absolutely wants to marry her, but he had a plan! An incredibly intricate and thoughtful twenty-two step plan that was going to take place over the course of the next month. It was all laid out in an entire binder in his desk. All he could muster in response was an extremely eloquent, “Uh—well, uh—”
Oblivious to his inner turmoil, you finally lifted your head to look at him with the biggest heart eyes he’s ever seen, and he can’t help but feel so, so guilty. “I just thought, why not, you know? Spencer, I love you a whole lot, and I’m pretty sure you love me a whole lot too. I want to spend the rest of my life with you, and I want the rest of my life to start right now.”
“No.”
Judging by the look on your face, that was clearly not the answer you were expecting. “No?”
“Uh, yeah, no.” God, stupid dumb idiot, telling the girl you want to marry that you don’t want to marry her. What’s the point of having 187 IQ points if you use exactly none of them when it actually matters?
“No, you don’t want to marry me?” Your heart dropped into your stomach and was falling further and further every passing second.
“Wait no, hold on—”
“No, I get it,” you choked out, hastily standing up from the bench. “Actually, I don’t get it, but that doesn’t really matter, I guess.” You jammed your arms into the sleeves of your jacket, so you could get out of this moment as soon as humanly possible. Holy shit, had you been blind-sided. “Um, I think I’m gonna go hang out with Penelope, might spend the night, I’m not sure. Enjoy your book.” And with that, you were speeding down the path out of the park.
“Wait, (Y/N/N)!” Spencer tried to gather his belongings to run after you, but you had a head start, and he couldn’t gather all of the books in his arms fast enough. Leave the books!!! Go after her!!! But you had already turned the corner and were out of sight.
With his books finally secure, Spencer sprinted in the direction of your shared apartment. He needed to fix this. And fast.
———
Morgan sat at his desk peacefully looking over the plans for a house he was renovating when the phone rang, and he couldn't help but internally groan at the sound. If Hotch is calling on his weekend off, so help him God, he would hang up and chuck the phone out the window.
Instead, he was met with Garcia’s voice, which was so loud he had to pull the phone away from his ear. “Whoa, whoa, whoa, mama. Let’s take it down a few notches.”
“Alright, fine, babycakes,” she hissed, and Derek was shocked at the unfamiliar venom in her tone. “Would you please be so kind as to explain to me why your dear friend Reid is the most evil, most reprehensible, most despicable—”
“Garcia, what are you talking about?”
“You mean that little rat boy hasn’t come crawling to you explaining his crimes?”
Despite his infinite patience for her antics, he sighed quietly. “I’m in the dark, baby girl, but I’m sure whatever Reid did, it can’t be that bad.”
“Oh, it can be that bad! He told (Y/N) that he didn’t want to marry her.”
“He did what?” Derek’s eyes were practically popping out of his head at the news. There’s no way that happened.
“He said that he didn’t want to marry our precious lily flower (Y/N)! I love that boy, but now, (Y/N) is here bawling her eyes out on my couch, and I don’t know what to do!”
His heart broke a little at the thought of his friend being so devastated, but he couldn’t help the roaring confusion that plagued him. Derek knew that Spencer was planning to propose to you; he’d seen the binder. He’d even been recruited to help with Steps 4, 9, 10, and 18!
Oh.
And that’s when Derek had a sneaking suspicion as to what had occurred. “Penelope, were his exact words ‘I don’t want to marry—” But his attention was drawn away from the phone by a knock on the door.
Speak of the devil….
“Garcia, I gotta go, but tell (Y/N) everything’s gonna be okay. I’m gonna have a word with our boy.”
“Oh my God, is he there with you?! That little bastard—” He hung up before her words could become any sharper, and the knocking became frantic.
“Okay, okay, I’m coming!” He jogged to go unlock the door. “You’re gonna knock the door down, kid.”
The door swung open to reveal Spencer, huffing and puffing with a red face and a binder in arm. “Morgan, I am the stupidest man to ever walk the Earth.”
“Did you run here?”
Ignoring the question, he pushed past him with an agitated step. “I am a complete idiot, a dumbass, if you will.”
Morgan shut the door and crossed his arms, walking to stand opposite Reid who had sat on the couch with his head in his hands. “Yeah, I might agree with you on that one. Garcia called me, told me (Y/N) is crying on her couch ‘cause you told her you didn’t want to marry her, which I know is not true.”
“I didn’t say that!” he cried, gesticulating wildly. “Not exactly. She asked me if I wanted to get married—”
“And what did you say?”
His hesitation was palpable. “...No.”
“Yeah, I’d say that constitutes dumbass behavior, especially because I know you only said that because you have your proposal all planned out, and you want it to be perfect.”
“Morgan, you don’t get it,” he implored, the desperation evident in his eyes, and Derek finally started feeling a little bad for the kid, an inkling of sympathy squirming in his gut. “No one deserves the most perfect proposal more than (Y/N). No one. You know how she’s always felt unwanted, and she’s told me that she felt like she always has to ask for love, and I couldn’t let her feel like that with me. I had to make sure that she had a special proposal because she’s special. And I want her to know without having to ask that I want her more than anything else in this world.”
Reid looked down at the toes of his scuffed Converse, hoping that he hadn’t permanently fucked up his best chance at happiness, and Morgan’s expression softened. “I know, kid. And I’m not trying to rub salt in the wound, but you do know that this was not the best way of letting her know that she’s wanted and loved?”
“Yes, I know, Morgan,” he muttered, voice breaking around the slug in his throat. “I wasn’t thinking.”
A sigh. “No, you weren’t. But I’m gonna help you fix it.”
Reid looked up with wide eyes. “Really?”
“You both deserve to be happy...even if you make some pretty stupid choices sometimes.”
Reid didn’t think he’d ever felt so grateful for his friend, and he offered a smile in gratitude. “Thanks. But I don’t even know where to start.”
Quirking an eyebrow and returning with a grin, Morgan picked up the binder from the table where it had been set. “I’ve got a couple ideas.”
———
“How is she doing?”
“Erm, it’s not looking great,” Garcia responded.
She was openly hostile when Reid had called her (he’d never been on the receiving end of Garcia’s wrath (so few people had been), and he was sure that was something he never wanted to experience again), but she’d finally restrained herself and offered a little empathy (not a lot though, she was too loyal to (Y/N) for that) when he had explained himself. However, when she’d been informed of the plan to apologize, regain your love and trust and to maybe, just maybe, ask for your hand in marriage, she had wholeheartedly avowed her support and pledged her help despite still being a little miffed at boy genius’ idiocy.
“She’s been sitting on the floor of the bathroom for an hour listening to Landslide on repeat and crying, so I would say she’s, um…not well.”
Spencer winced at that, and he felt physically sick at the thought that you were hurting because of him. His heart clenched unbearably, and he wished so badly that he could take back his words and just say yes, but unfortunately for him, time is linear, and he was just going to have to do his best to fix things.
“I just need a couple more hours to get everything ready.”
“Well, hurry up, pretty boy! I love our girl immensely, but if I have to hear Stevie Nicks mourn the passage of time and love one more time, I will lose my mind.”
“Garcia, please, just be patient.”
She groaned. “You’re lucky I love you.” And with that, she hung up.
———
You huffed a sigh, clutching to your chest a shiny pink pillow covered in sequins and giving Garcia the biggest puppy eyes you could muster. “Please, Penny, let’s not go out to dinner. Let’s just stay in and order Cheesecake Factory; you love Cheesecake Factory!”
“You’re right I do, but I love you more, and right now, you need to get up and get some fresh air!” The almost excessive amount of peppiness in her voice and her refusal of Cheesecake Factory was slightly suspicious, but you didn’t really have time to consider it as she dragged you up off the couch and to the door.
“Okay, counterpoint: what if you went out for dinner, and I stayed in and wallowed in self-pity?”
By the look on her face, you knew your evading tactics were not going to fly. She tutted slightly and said, “You’ve got to know I can’t let you do that. I’m legally obligated to stay with you until you feel better, that’s the deal when you’re friends with me.” She grabbed your coat, holding it open for you.
Reluctantly, you sighed and slid your arms in, grumbling, “You’re too nice for your own good.”
“Well, that’s very sweet of you, but let’s get a move on!” And with that, she herded you out the door.
———
It was a nice dinner, the two of you out on the town, and for a while, you were granted the solace of distraction. Garcia took you into the city, and somehow it felt a little easier to breathe there under the streetlights amidst a bustling Saturday night crowd. You nestled together in some street corner diner, ordering an absurd amount of food and jabbering on about anything and everything. If she noticed the moments when you fell silent, eyes distant and glassy, (and she definitely did), she never said anything; she just offered a new topic and redirected you from the very sad place that was thoughts of Spencer. And you would latch on eagerly, seizing the opportunity to forget.
So, you spent the evening with late night waffles and french fries and milkshakes and the unending source of cheer that was Penelope Garcia, and by the end of it, your mind didn’t immediately redirect to that morning’s tragedy, which Garcia would define as a success. Together, you found your way back to her car, and you tumbled into the passenger seat, your eyelids immediately fluttering shut. Penelope grinned and drove off.
When you woke again, you were engulfed in bewilderment and not just the regular post-nap disorientation. “Penny, why are we at the National Mall? This is the opposite direction of your house.”
She tapped her acrylics on the steering wheel and nervously surveyed the street in front of her, trying to escape your prying gaze. “Uh—no reason!”
Too exhausted from your day of grief and distraction to be suspicious of her terrible lying, you leaned your head back against the seat, watching the glow of the streetlamps as they roved over the interior of the car.
Garcia seized this movement to set the next part of Reid’s plan in motion. “Hey! You know, what’d be fun is if we went to the Natural History museum! There’s nothing better to cheer you up than dusty old dinosaur bones.” (She didn’t necessarily understand the appeal, but she was trying her best.)
A small chuckle escaped you. “As much as I’d love that, it closed at nine, so we wouldn’t even be able to get in anyway.”
Garcia’s mind thundered furiously as she tried to come up with some way to get you in that freaking building. “Let’s just walk past! Take a peek through the windows, see what we can see!”
Something in you sensed that she wasn’t going to let this go, so you relented as she finagled some sort of street parking that was definitely illegal. You could barely get your seatbelt off before she was dragging you the stone steps, the massive corinthian columns looming. You squeaked a quick Penelope! and tried to keep up. Entirely ready to give up and head back to the car when she tried the door, your mouth fell open in shock when it gave way with ease.
“Oh, look! It’s open! Let’s go inside.”
She didn’t wait for you to respond before she was ducking in the building, and you followed, completely and utterly baffled. Stumbling into the atrium, you were met by a receptionist at the desk. She smiled warmly, “Miss (Y/L/N), I presume?”
You nodded slowly before turning to Garcia whose devious smirk was undeniable. “Penny, what is going on?”
She grabbed your hands and looked at you with tears in her eyes. (Where the hell did those come from?) “Just remember that you’re a very forgiving person, and that sometimes the smartest of us can also be the most stupid.”
Furrowing your brows at that slightly cryptic message, you went to respond when the receptionist stood and said, “If you would, miss, please follow me.”
And so you walked with this stranger through the empty halls, the click of her heels echoing. It was odd to see a space that was normally flushed with people completely empty, and you studied the walls as you walked. “Um, may I ask what’s going on?”
The receptionist grinned, “I’m sorry, but I’m under strict instructions from Dr. Reid to not reveal anything.”
Strict instructions from Dr. Reid. You gasped a little at that, and your thoughts raged with possibilities of what Spencer could possibly have planned. If this was an elaborate attempt at an apology, you were a little overwhelmed; the little dispute this morning absolutely did not necessitate a response of this degree. Sure, you were disappointed, and you needed time to deal with it away from him, but you weren’t mad at him, not really. You had talked about marriage and knew that it was something you both wanted, but you had never discussed when. If he wasn’t ready to marry you quite yet, that was fine; you’d adjust. You were pretty sure you’d wait a whole lifetime for him. Besides, you had sprung it on him quite abruptly, and you knew Spencer and that he was not always well-equipped to deal with monumental change, and how could you blame him for that? You’d wait as long as he needed.
“Here we are!”
Her words broke you from your thoughts, and you looked up to realize you were at the Hall of Fossils. (You had always been fond of the dinosaurs.) Glancing at the girl, you asked, “What do I do now?”
She laughed a little at that. “Just go inside. Take a look around.” And with that, she turned around, leaving you to wander the exhibit.
So you ambled easily through the prehistoric relics and fossilized memories of a past Earth. It was rather haunting, the eerie silence and the illuminated dinosaur skeletons. You peered down at one of the explanatory plaques and instead found a blue post-it note. COLD. A grin wormed its way onto your face, and you jogged a little to the next plaque. GREENHOUSE GASES—WARMER. Spencer was always one for a game. So you zig-zagged through, collecting post-its. GLACIAL PERIOD—COLDER. CRETACEOUS WARMING. EOCENE KIND OF HOT!
With the last note, you looked up and gasped yet again. Spencer was standing in a sea of different plants and flowers placed throughout the central clearing, and donning his signature tight-lipped smile and your favorite of his cardigans, he gave you a small wave. “Hi.”
“Hello.” Your response was breathless, and now that you had met his eyes, you couldn’t tear yours away. A weight lifted from your lungs, it was such a relief to see him, and you hadn’t realized how much you had missed him in the hours you spent apart until you could breathe properly again. “Fancy seeing you here.”
He chuckled at that, but the tension in his shoulders never released; he was clearly anxious, but for what reason, it was hard to say.
An amusing gleam in his eye, he replied, “Same to you.”
“How did you get into the museum after hours?”
He took the moment to examine the toes of his shoes, replying delicately, “I have friends in high places.”
“Ah, Dr. Reid, I always forget that you ruled the world of academia before your time fighting crime.”
He paused for a moment before continuing. “Do you remember our first date?”
You gave him a tender smile, and his racing heartbeat eased ever so slightly, you just had that kind of effect on him. “Well,” you began, “I remember you were wearing that cardigan, the one that I love, and I was so nervous I thought I was going to pass out—”
“I was definitely more nervous. I was so anxious I forgot who Carl Sagan was at one point.”
“I’d forgotten about that!” You giggled at the memory. “But I remember being in this room, and we were making stupid dinosaur puns, and I believe I told you that you are dino-mite….”
He nodded meekly with a subdued grin. “I think that was the moment I fell in love with you.” Meeting his eyes once again, you felt the wind knocked out of you. The utter honesty you found radiating from his soft golden irises hurt your heart, and it was impossible to not believe him. He fell in love on the first date, how sweet and lovely and perfectly Spencer is that?
You took a breath and began to walk closer, skimming a hand over the lush greenery around you. “You know, the last time I was here, I didn’t remember there being so much flora.”
As if he had forgotten the miniature forest that surrounded him, he surveyed the plants surrounding him. There was a sea of succulents and ferns and honeysuckle and peonies and almost every other plant under the sun. “Yes, they’re a new addition. And if I recall correctly, it seems that lots of your favorites have made an appearance.”
“It does appear that way.”
He reached out to gently lift one strand of a nearby fern. “I believe you’ve mentioned before that you would ‘take a fern over a flower any day of the week.’”
“That would explain why they seem to be taking over the windowsills of our apartment.”
“True. Did you know that in the Victorian floriography, the fern represented sincerity and humility? So maybe if somebody had made a stupid mistake and they were trying to let someone know that they were really sorry, they might give a fern to say that they know they were being an idiot and they felt really bad for what they did.”
You laughed airily, “No, I was not aware of that fact.”
He closed the gap between you, reaching to tuck an errant lock of hair behind your ear. He simultaneously managed to pull a small bouquet of purple-ish flowers from thin air, causing more laughter to bubble from you. The laughing is a good sign, he thought, grinning. Keep going! “To really drive the point home, they might also give some columbine which represents foolishness.”
You looked up at him, your expression bright. “Oh man, this guy feels really bad.”
“Yeah,” he agreed before his words took a more somber cadence. “Yeah, he does.”
Your face softened. “Spence—”
“Um, before you say anything else, (Y/N), I just need to let you know how sorry I am for this morning. I love you so, so much, and I never want you to doubt that, and—”
“Spencer, slow down. Really, it’s okay! I’m not mad.”
“Well, I’m glad you’re not angry with me, but it’s not okay because you still deserve an apology. A good apology. So,” he took a deep breath, “I am so very sorry for my actions and for letting you think for even a second that you’re not the most important thing in my life, and I’m sorry that I didn’t tell you that I want to marry you when you asked because I do. I really, really do.”
Something warm and elated simmered in your stomach, and you beamed at him. “I’m glad because I wanna marry you too.” But before you could get too caught up in the moment, you remembered your earlier thoughts. “I don’t want to push you in any way, though, or make you commit to anything before you’re ready because marriage is kind of a big deal, and I’m happy to wait. Spencer Reid, I’d wait for you forever.”
“I don’t want to wait.” He shook his head and began digging in his pocket.
Your eyes widened in shock and spluttered, “Spence, seriously, if you’re not ready—”
“I am ready.” Finally, he found it and pulled out a small velvet box, looking you dead in the eye. “(Y/N/N), I have been planning this for so long because I wanted it to be perfect for you. You deserve nothing less than the absolute best, and I wanted to give that to you.”
His admission gave you pause. “Wait, you’ve had this planned?”
“I’ve been planning this for months! This isn’t me trying to fumble around and fix my mistake. I have a binder and everything, you can ask Derek. That’s the only reason I said no!”
“You said no because you had a binder for your proposal plan?” you teased.
You both broke out into laughter at that.
Recovering his breath and trying to suppress his ever-growing grin, he said, “No, that’s not why. The only reason I said no earlier is because I needed to show you how much I wanted to say yes. You deserve the best, you deserve every star in the sky and every beautiful thing on this earth, and I wanted to make sure I gave that to you when we decided to spend the rest of our lives together because I want to be enough for you.” Trying to swallow around the slug in his throat, he continued, voice breaking slightly. “This is me giving you all the love I have to offer. You’re it for me, (Y/N). And frankly, I don’t want to spend another second without you.”
He settled on one knee and opened the box, looking up at you with the gentlest gaze and a pounding heart. The wetness of your eyes matched his, and you gave him a watery smile. “I’m saying yes now. I would really, really like to marry you, (Y/N/N), if you’ll still have me.”
“Of course, you absolute dork.” Yanking him up from the ground and grinning like a madman, you grabbed his face and pulled him in for the messiest kiss. He clutched your waist and held you as close as he could possibly manage. (His desire to never be parted seemed to be coming to fruition in the sort of melding of bodies that was occurring.) Clashing teeth and knocking noses, it was hard to settle things when neither of you could stop beaming. Overwhelmed by the complete and utter joy bubbling up in his chest, Spencer hugged you tightly before spinning you in a circle, both of you devolving into boisterous giggles.
“Wait,” he murmured. “I forgot to give you the ring, I still need to seal the deal!” To which, you responded with another peal of laughter (something he thought he would never tire of hearing), as his trembling fingers floundered for the ring.
“I’m pretty sure that’s not how it works, but I’ll take it either way.”
He finally secured, and taking your hand in his ever so gently tenderly, he slid a glimmering emerald on your finger.
“Oh, Spencer, it’s beautiful.” He let out a sigh of relief. With light confusion, you asked, “What’s the sigh for, handsome?”
“I know you wanted a special ring, but when I went ring shopping with Derek, there was nothing I thought you’d like, so I special-ordered one from this shop that was going to be your size and everything, but that ring wasn’t going to be ready for a couple weeks. So today, when I knew I had to propose tonight, I ran to that vintage store you love and came across this one, and I thought you’d like it, but I wasn’t sure it was gonna fit, and—”
“I love it,” you looked at him, trying to will him to understand the depth of your sincerity. “And it fits perfectly!”
“How serendipitous.” He thought his face was going to split in half, he was smiling so wide. He couldn’t stop looking at the ring on your finger. How could one silly little rock make tears well in his eyes? Nonetheless, the sight of it made his heart race and his stomach churn with unrepentant butterflies because looking at it, he knew the girl he loved more than anything else on the planet, his favorite person had chosen to spend the rest of her life listening to his rambles and laughing at his jokes and sitting next to him by the pond in the park. The listless dream that had seemed so hopeless and romantic finally came to fruition in that shiny green stone, so no, he would not stop staring.
“Indeed,” you mused, subtle and irresistible risibility fizzing in the silence that followed. You contemplated for a moment before asking, “What do we do now?”
A thoughtful frown graced his lips, and then he shrugged. “We have the museum until midnight. We could just wander for a bit.”
Your eyes widened to the size of dinner plates and you tugged on his sleeve, your excitement palpable. “I’ve always wanted to be in a museum when no one’s around at night! Oh my god, Spencer, it’s just like Night at the Museum!”
He quirked a brow, and a sly smirk turned up the corners of his mouth. “Does that mean I have to protect you when the dinosaur skeletons come to life?”
You scoffed, “Please, we both know that I’d be the one protecting you.”
Another devolution into giggling. It seemed to be your thing tonight.
“Fair enough.”
“Also, do we get to keep all of these plants?” His eyes remained glued to your flushed face as you peered around the room. He wasn’t ashamed to admit just how besotted he was, shamelessly beaming at his fiancée.
“I bought them for you, so yeah.”
“Sick! Our apartment’s gonna turn into a little greenhouse!”
He extended a crooked arm to you, to which you looped yours in his and proceeded to set off on your museum adventure. You learned your head on his shoulder as you walked, completely and perfectly and incandescently happy.
“Hey, Spence?”
“Yes, dear?”
“I love you very much.”
“I love you too, dear.”
#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid fluff#spencer reid fanfic#spencer reid angst#spencer reid#anyone else obsessed with winston bishop?#i'd die for him#also can anyone tell that my fav literary device is polysyndeton#bc i feel like i use it way too often :/#actually i don't care!#bc i love it#also i counted three allusions in this bad boy if u find them all u get extra credit :)#jkjkjkjk#i hope all of the three people awake rn enjoy this
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