#dear evan hansen is hot garbage | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

ramblings-of-a-mad-cat · 3 years

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redemption arc this, redemption arc that, can we please just get a character who gets worse as the story goes on. seeing someone corrupt is WAY more interesting imho

You want Evan Hansen, my friend.

There is a movie that has come out, but it doesn't look very good to me and from what I'm hearing, it's actually hot garbage. Among other reasons, they cut important songs. Basically always try to find the staged version of the Dear Evan Hansen musical if you're going to check it out. And do check it out because it's an amazing story. So if you can locate any, ah...slime tutorials, definitely jump at the chance to check this out. You'll thank me later. The rest of this post is just going to be me gushing so feel free to punch out for the day.

The protagonist starts out as a shy and awkward kid with depression and no friends, who winds up in a very tricky position where he can either embarrass himself and break the heart of a mother who's just lost her son...or he can tell a lie. A lie that is basically harmless (or at least, well intended) at first. But gradually begins to grow and snowball into something far worse. It reaches the point where Evan is not lying to help this grieving family, he's doing it for personal gain, and the whole thing becomes very unhealthy by the end. He starts out innocent, having been put in a position where the right answer was difficult to gauge, and he could be forgiven for making a mistake. But overtime, he descends further into selfishness and manipulation. Helping the broken family, helping the people who were inspired by the lie, it's not about that anymore. It all becomes secondary to Evan, it comes after having his emotional needs met by the dead son's parents and sister. (Who he starts dating...so yikes.)

Y'know what, I can't be vague anymore, I've got to get into spoilers. Because I have so many thoughts about this production and all of these moments. When it reaches the point of the Murphys literally offering Connor's college fund to Evan...holy heck, was that uncomfortable. The lie had just gone way too far, and even if all of it had been true...giving Evan Connor's old tie is one thing. It's sweet. But at a certain point, they really needed to stop giving Evan Connor's old things. I know Heidi was probably just feeling hurt and jealous, but she wasn't entirely wrong. Connor's parents were using Evan as a replacement goldfish, even if they were doing it unconsciously. Hey, here's a thought. Evan was spending many nights at the Murphy's house by Act II. Where was he sleeping? I don't see them making him take the couch, and I doubt they'd let him sleep in Zoe's room...what does that leave? Yeah, Evan was totally sleeping in Connor's room. I can just imagine Cynthia waving off his stammers with a line like "Of course Connor wouldn't mind, silly!" Eesh, shivers. Seriously, Evan is the villain of this story. He is the antagonist, really.

This is why "Good For You" and "So Big, So Small" are two of the most powerful songs in the show (Though, nothing will ever top "Words Fail" like...like ever.) In the former, Evan's lie is finally stretched to it's breaking point, and the stress of maintaining it is really getting to him. He's hurt the people who actually cared about him, who always did - with no need for Evan to lie. Yes, Jared and Alannah were kind of annoying, but they were facing demons just like Evan, and we saw how "annoying" he was to people himself. They cared about Evan, they were friendly to him. Don't even get me started on Heidi. Evan has just taken everything for granted, and his line "It's not my fault that other people can." To Heidi, just...Heidi is probably my favorite character. She did not deserve that crap. I know she wasn't always there for her child emotionally, and he had mental illness so that's a pretty significant failing...but it's not like it was her fault. She was working like, what, three jobs? To keep a roof over their heads? She was doing everything she could. In the end, the Murphys don't forgive Evan (I suppose Zoe kind of does, after a while) but Heidi forgives him and I think that's kind of brilliant.

This show is just the kind of human drama that I absolutely devour. The emotions and situations that invoke them are incredible. And I can think of no finer example of a good person descending into villainy. This isn't Star Wars or Harry Potter, there's no "dark side" for them to fall into. No, this is just human beings making choices with nuance, and getting complacent with their crimes, desensitized to what they've done when they don't have to face consequences. And Evan seeing himself as he really is, having lost everything that he'd gained...especially given that he's a person with depression...fucking hell, Words Fail makes me choke up every single time. Here's a dark thought. Read the lyrics and tell me they don't sound like a suicide note. They totally do, and now you can never unsee it.

And possibly the best part is that unlike most stories that use this plot, where the shady character deceives their friends and gets caught during the climax? Evan is not forgiven. Connor's parents will have nothing to do with him. Zoe eventually seems to show understanding for why he did it, but they don't get back together. They part on peaceful, if somewhat awkward, terms. After a year, mind you. Evan doesn't get to keep the bonds that he formed - because of how he formed them. Because of his lies. That's realistic and it's good that he faced consequences, but also good that they weren't life-ending consequences. I'm so glad he got to reconcile with Heidi.

#Dear Evan Hansen #Writing #Fictional Characters #Writing Tropes #Evan Hansen #Zoe Murphy #Heidi Hansen

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gooseking · 3 years

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I wanna make a list of all the things I've hyperfixated on because I want to reminisce back to when I was happy consuming/thinking of these things:

As a kid, I hyperfixated on:

Garbage Pail Kids

Spongebob (that was my main hyperfixation)

Care Bears

Hot Wheels

Webkinz

Alvin and the Chipmunks Meet the Wolfman

Barnyard

Hannah Montana

As a preteen, I hyperfixated on:

Harry Potter

Pokémon

My Little Pony Friendship is Magic

As an early teen, I hyperfixated on:

Creepypasta

Death Note

Gravity Falls

Five Nights At Freddy's

Undertale

(I know those are mostly cringey and I was a very cringey teen but that's how I coped lmao)

As a late teen, I hyperfixated on:

Steven Universe

Critical Role

Furries

Night in the Woods

Heathers

Be More Chill

Dear Evan Hansen

Hamilton

Jekyll and Hyde

My Hero Academia

Animal Crossing

(Wow the reality of childhood coming to an end and adulthood really setting in did a number on me lmao I just bounced around with these hyperfixations most of the time; one week it would be one musical, the next would be another)

Now, I hyperfixate on:

The Owl House

Hiraeth

Other people's art

Demon Slayer

Friday Night Funkin'

Frankenstein

I might be missing some here and there, but at the top of my head, yeah I found comfort in all of these things and use(d) them as an escape from reality which may or may not have been damaging in the long run lmao I've grown out of a lot of these hyperfixations, but I'll often go back and relive them for nostalgia purposes and remember when I was comforted by them. If anyone brings any of these up, I can talk your ear off with memories I live with because of how they comforted me. This may explain why I am the way I am today xD

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fooltomery · 4 years

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i have some thoughts about the james and the giant peach musical and the matilda musical. i feel like james should have gotten what matilda got.

the matilda musical has a very talented cast of kids and adults alike but like. the only memorable song from that musical is revolting children. the rest of the musical is subpar imo. plus, trunchbull really did not need to be played in drag. i understand in the movie shes masculine in some ways and thats played for laughs which is mildly transphobic, but shes a complete caricature in the musical. idk it just really rubs me the wrong way. that said, ive never read the book. knowing roald dahls track record, the musical characterization of trunchbull is prob based off of the book. but regardless, still leaves a bad taste in my mouth.

the james and the giant peach musical however, is fantastic.

the musical heavily makes up for where the movie (which is hot garbage in a lot of ways) lacked plot-wise and song-wise.

the songs in the musical are SO good. its done by the same composers as dear evan hansen, if that isnt proof enough.

(the songs fucking slap. seriously. give them a listen.)

i just dont get why matilda went to the tonys? when james and the giant peach exists?

james should have went to broadway and the tonys. matilda really shouldnt have gotten that with what it has.

yes, jatgp had a rough start because some of the first versions were just pretty okay, but the current version improved upon those flaws greatly. it just shouldnt have died out like it did. there is so much good there that just got wasted because it wasnt given a chance.

its just sad that the only way this show is done now is by middle and high schools. i mean, i did this musical my junior year. we didnt do it justice to put it lightly. (its not an easy show, but thats because its good lol) james deserves a professional and talented cast. the voice cast for the recorded album is an exceptionally talented cast and i WISH they performed this show with that cast.

i mean shit, brian d’arcy james, christian borle, sarah stiles? and other very talented actors that have been in other successful broadway shows? the dream.

anyways tl;dr: the james and the giant peach musical deserved so much better.

#i was vaguely reminded of james today and i was reminded of all my Thoughts.#its so good.#jatgp #james and the giant peach #james and the giant peach musical #cj chatters

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nose-coffee · 6 years

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Musicals As Vines

The 25th Annual Putnam Spelling Bee: Iridocylcitis

A Chorus Line: Oh my gosh, Marlene, your speech was so good. ReAlLy CaUsE i DiDn’T eVeN lIkE iT iT wAs JuSt ImPrOv AnD i JuSt- OH MY GOD WHY CAN’T YOU JUST TAKE THE FREAKING COMPLIMEEEEEENT

The Addams Family: go ahead and pull it through *cat paw through a hole pulls a cord through*

A Gentleman’s Guide To Love and Murder: WAKE UP SLEEPY HEAD! what the fuck dude? we’re trying to sleep. *hysterical laughter*

Amélie: *A sweet saxophone solo* Hi, welcome to Chili’s

American Psycho: dETECTIVE THIS IS A CRIME SCENE. WHAT, IS THIS THE MURDER WEAPON? GET OFF MY D I C K

Anastasia: Who’s that Pokémon? IT’S PIKACHU! It’s Clefairy! F U C K!

Annie: PARENTS EXCUSE MY POTTY MOUTH, SHUT THE FUCK UP!

Avenue Q: ShAwTy I dOn’T M I N D/that Nanalan vine where she says fuck

Bandstand: *toy cat on the floor* and i DONT WANT THE WORLD TO SEE ME *cats neck extends horrifically*

The Bands Visit: GET TO DEL TACO. THEY GOT A NEW THING CALLED FRE SHA *giggles uncontrollably* FRE SHA VOC ADO

Bare; A Pop Opera: welcome to bible studies, we’RE ALL CHILDREN OF JESUS! KUMBAYAAAAAA MY LORD-/Two bros, chillin’ in a hot tub, five feet apart, ‘cause they’re not gay

Be More Chill: Hey, bro, what do you want to eat? THE SOULS OF THE INNOCENT- a bagel NO- two bagels

Billy Elliot: *That kid dancing in a far off elevator*

Bonnie and Clyde: Just put the money in the bag. Okay, do you have a bag? We had to bring our own bag? How inconvenient.

Book Of Mormon: I WANT A CHURCH GIRL WHO GO TO CHURCH, AND REEEAD HER BIIIIBLE

Bring It On: PATRICIA! Get it together sweetie, we have a show tomorrow

Cabaret: Two shots of vodka *glug glug glug glug glug*

Carrie: HoW dO yOu KnOw WhAt’S gOoD fOr Me? THAT’S MY O P I N I ON

Catch Me If You Can: *screaming* WHY RE YOU RUNNING? W H Y AREYOURUNNING?

Cats: Dress for the job you want! Oh, you want to be a vet? No, I want to be a cat.

Chess: hi, thanks for checking in, I’m still a piece of garbage!

Chicago: YOU READY TO FUCKING DIE, BITCH? NAH, I’M A BAD BITCH, YOU CAN’T KILL ME!

Come From Away: Canadian animals can be extremely dangerous, but if you respect them, they'll respect you. What the fuck - get OFF THE CAR, YOU STUPID MOOSE

Dear Evan Hansen: *Kid in a tree* Dad, I’m scared! Do you trust me, son? Yes. *Kid falls out of tree, dad turns to camera* Rule number one, never trust anyone/kEVIN, WATCH THE LIGHT, DUDE. wATCH THE LIGHT. *Kevin pauses, and then smashes his pillow into the light, breaking it*

Dogfight: Sarah? Yeah? Never fight and ugly girl; she’s got nothing to lose. Okay, grandma

Evita: *Screaming in a shopping trolley as it rolls out of control in a parking lot*

Falsettos: *Slow zoom in* *doorbell* OOOOoOOoooOOOOOO

Fiddler on the Roof: I WANT A TEMPLE GIRL, WHO GO TO TEMPLE, AND REEEEAD HER TOOOORAH

Finding Neverland: *Frantic recorder playing in a parked car*

Fun Home: Dad? Is this where you’ve been for the past ten years? *dad sinks back into blackness* DAD N O/*Just that vine of the dad talking on the phone while his kid tries to play frisbee with him and him slapping the frisbee out of the air whenever it comes near him*

Grease: baby it’s You You’Re the ONe I LoVE YOU’RE THE ONE I N E E D

Groundhog Day: It was a gopher, and it was controlling time. I had to shoot it, yeah, I did

Gypsy: Where do you want to get a healthy snack, Rebecca? I want Chipotle. I said a hEALTHY SNACK-

Hadestown: *discordant strum* I love you bitch *discordant strum* I ain't never gonna stop loving you, b I t ch

Hairspray: This land is your land. This land is my land. This land is your land. THIS LAND IS MY LAND, THIS LAND IS MY LAND

Hamilton: So, basically, what I was thinking was *slap* oH fUcK i CaN’t BeLiEvE yOu’Ve DoNe ThIs

Heathers: Don’t tell your mother. Kiss one another? DIE FOR EACH OTHER! *Falls out of chair*/*Guy walking out of 7/11, trips, spills slurpee* SHIT

In The Heights: Zach stop/so, as it turns out, I’m not going to college, I’m going to hell, I’m, uh, not excited

Into The Woods: *screams at kid coming around corner* *kid screams and then stares at the camera in a pissed off way*/oh, I would, but I've just got too much to do, tonight *cuts to him chugging beer and playing a synth on his bed*

Jesus Christ Superstar: I brought you frankincense. Thank you. And I brought you...mhyr. Thank you. MHYR-DUR! *sassy gasp* JUDAS, N O!/Don’t cross me, shout out to Jesus...what rhymes with Jesus?

Joseph and His Amazing Technicolour Coat: *Shovelling snow and slips and falls for six seconds before recovering, miraculously*

Kinky Boots: *Crashing noises* *Door opens* I got new shoes

Legally Blonde: Girl, you’re thicker than a bowl of oatmeal.

Les Miserables: wElL wHeN lIfE gIvEs YoU lEmOnS *fun jingle*

The Lion King: Be nice to the babies *cat pushes one kitten off the dresser* NO

Little Shop of Horrors: Put that candy back, I’m not buying you all that mess. OOP, TRY ME BITCH

Matilda: What’s the one thing worse than a rapist? BOOM. A cHiLd. N O-

Mean Girls: *scoffs* you can’t sit here! Actually, Megan, I can’t sit ANYWHERE, I have hemorrhoids

Miss Saigon: daddy? DO I LOOK LIKE-

Natasha, Pierre, and the Great Comet of 1812: What have you got for me, today, Mr Postman? Just this LETTER! JOhn I don’t love you

Newsies: BACK AT IT AGAIN AT KRISPY KREME *flips*/what does it say? Hot boy. HOT BOY HOT BOY HOTBOYHOTBOY

Next to Normal: Dad, look, it’s the good kush! This is the dollar store, how good can it be?/THAT’S IT, GET ON TOP OF THE FRIDGE, GET UP THERE! THIS HOUSE IS A FUCKING N I G H T M A R E!

Once On This Island: We all die, you either kill yourself or get killed. WATCHA GONNA DO? WATCHA GONNA DO?

Phantom of the Opera: Dad, I found my new favourite song. *Opening chords of Phantom of the Opera* *dad looks disappointed and vaguely uncomfortable*

Pippin: I wish I could fly away and never come back! Your wish is granted. I miss my xbox

Rent: *All the soft drinks into one cup* Fuck you/*Completely Giving Up, starring Me*

Rocky Horror Picture Show: Wait a minute. Who ARE you?

Singin' In The Rain: *just that guy skipping down the street to that Lady Gaga song*

Sound Of Music: *class full of students singing along to a piano* AW SKEET SKEET MOTHERFUCKER, AW SKEET SKEET, GODDAMN

Spongebob Squarepants: What if my nose was *gasps* Hello i’m squidward haHahA *Begins to cry*/SQUIDWARD! *Squidward dabs* *fans scream*

Spring Awakening: What happened while I was gone? Yo Jessica had three kids. What? I was gone for a day! She been fucking./When we gonna churn butter and chill? EZEKIEL! After my chores

Sweeney Todd; the Demon Barber of Fleet Street: WHEN WILL YOU LEARN? WHEN WILL YOU LEARN THAT YOUR ACTIONS HAVE CONSEQUENCES? *screams*

Urinetown: *Kermit sitting on a log* 3 2 1! *water gets poured on him, cuts to him falling off a building*/*kid with a mullet bottle flips a wine glass and dabs, with Mad World playing in the background*

Waitress: I can’t give you the display bagel; it’s not real. TASTY. N O

Wicked: And they were roommates. Oh My GoD tHeY wErE rOoMaTeS

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you-and-i-for-forever · 7 years

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10 Things I Hate About You AU Chapter 4 (Part A)

Fandom: Be More Chill, Dear Evan Hansen

Ships: Boyf riends, treebros, richjake, Zolana, Pinkberry

Word count: 3.7k

Feel free the read this on my ao3 instead!

Read chapter 1 here, 2 here, 3 here if you’ve missed them!

“Are you lost?” Jake asked eyebrow raised.

Jared looked like a fucking idiot. He had tried his best to seem cool and confident as he swaggered across the lunchroom, towards the large group of popular assholes.

Fuck! Why were they all so tall and good looking? Jared had made his way past a few of them to sit down in a chair next to Jake. Jake had slowly looked up from his phone, with a face that asked what the actual fuck?

“No, actually, I just came by to chat,” Jared said, smearing a smirk onto his face.

“Uuuuh…we don't chat,” Jake deadpanned, wiggling his hand at him in a dismissive manner. A few of Jake’s friends snickered.

Jared forced his mouth into a smile, trying to seem nice, but really wanting to knock Jake’s phone out of his hand and walk away. God, what a complete douchebag.

He was doing this for Michael and he was not going to screw this up. “Well, actually, I thought that I'd run an idea by you. Just to see if you're interested.” Jared was gonna try and schmooze the hell out of this guy.

Jake blinked at him a few times before giving a disinterested “I’m not, thanks,” and turned back to his phone.

Jared held out his hands in front of him, almost like he was trying to calm a wild animal rather than trying to keep this idiots attention. “Well, hear me out. Now...you want to date Jeremy Heere, right?”

“Who?” Jake asked

Was he fucking serious?

“The uh…the new kid.”

“Oh yeah,” Jake said, having the decency to almost look just the slightest bit embarrassed.

“Okay, but he can't go out with you because his parents have a rule that he can’t date until his older stepbrother, Evan, dates, but no one will go out with him because he’s sad and weird, right?” Jared said, feeling like he was talking to a brick wall.

Jake rested his head on his hand, looking entirely done with what Jared had to say. “Does this conversation have a purpose?”

Jared didn't think he could roll his eyes hard enough.

“What I think you need to do is hire someone who'll go out with Evan. Someone who’s just as lame and invisible as he is so he doesn’t feel that way anymore and you can go out with Jeremy.” Jared said

“Why not just date the loser yourself then?” A guy from across the table snorted.

Jared smiled and flipped him off.

“Look I already figured out the perfect person,” Jared explained, pointing towards the windows on the adjacent wall. Connor was currently sitting alone on the far side of the courtyard, smoking weed. Jake squinted at him before his eyes became huge.

“That guy?” Jake asked, alarmed, “I heard he ate a live duck once.”

Jared nodded, he had heard that too. “Everything but the beak and feet. He’s a loser, Evan’s a loser; clearly, he’s a solid investment.”

Jake continued to stare at Connor, eyebrows furrowed. Jared could almost feel the wheels in this Neanderthals head start to turn.

“What's in it for you?” Jake finally asked, turning back towards Jared.

“Hey. I’m walkin’ down the hall and say hello to you. You say hello to me,” Jared smiled, quick on his feet to come up with a reason. It was probably pathetic, but he really wouldn’t mind if Jake actually did that.

“Yeah yeah. I get it. You’re cool by association.” Jake paused for a moment, before shrugging. “I’ll think about it.”

“Nice,” Jared said usual smirk returning to his mouth, relieved his plan seemed like it was working.

“We’re done now,” Jake said, raising an eyebrow.

Jared had overstayed his welcome at the table of beautiful, untouchable gods. Now to return to the world of the mortals.

“Yeah.” Jared nodded and got up and crossed the cafeteria back over to where he had left a very upset looking Michael.

“What are you doing getting him involved?” Michael asked, standing up to meet him, clearly upset. To be fair, Jared had just sort of just gotten up from the table randomly and walked over to Jake with no explanation of Michael. Thankfully Jeremy wasn't around today to see Michael's head almost explode.

“Relax. We let him pretend he’s calling the shots. While he’s setting things up, you have time with Jeremy,” Jared said sitting down at the table and grabbed for Michael’s Flaming Hot Cheetos. He began to chow down. Michael sank down next to him and opened and shut his mouth a few times.

“That is a good idea,” Michael replied, with the same tone and express as before.

Jared laughed and patted his back, “Yeah, I know.”

God Connor hated all of this. He had been able to force himself to get to every day of school so far but it was all a fucking horrible. All the whispers and the glances and the laughing. Someone had stuffed garbage into his bag when he wasn’t looking and had slipped a note into his locker telling him to kill himself.

He had tried to convince his mom to let him do online classes or homeschool but she had said that he needed to be around people his age, interact with others, try and make friends. She had no clue what this school was like though, how no one was ever going to want to be his friend, let alone talk to him.

He sat in the courtyard, blunt hanging off his lip, flipping through a history textbook. So fucking boring, but Connor really, really, needed his parents off his back so he was willing to do some homework to get that to happen.

Connor rubbed at his eyes, every part of his feeling tired and rundown but suddenly felt a presence and eyes on him. He jolted his head to look up.

It was some guy Connor didn’t know, he felt caught off guard.

What the fuck did this guy want? Connor tried to keep his anger from flaring up, but it was just his gut reaction.

“Hey, how ya doin’?” The guy asked him with a smile that was half nervous-half charismatic. Weird, Connor usually only got the full nervous smiles.

Connor glared at him then looked away, trying to ignore him. He really hoped he wasn’t going to get food thrown at him or something shitty like that.

“I had some great duck last night...” He said.

“Do I know you?” Connor finally spoke, looking back at him. God, he was annoying.

“I’m Jake Dillinger,” He said like Connor was supposed to know who he was.

“Cool, bye,” Connor said, standing up and starting to pack his stuff up. Better get out of here before this idiot made Connor do something that would wind him up in the principal’s office, or worse, that freaky guidance counselor’s office.

“Hey, wait! Uh, you see that guy?” Jake said, pointing out a familiar looking guy, making his way through across the crowded courtyard. It was the kid from the bathroom a while ago. From what he could see, he still had the cast wrapped around his arm.

“Yeah,” Connor replied, just the slightest bit curious.

“That’s Evan Hansen. I want you to go out with him.” Jake said

Connor’s expression twisted and he felt like ripping this asshole's face off. Connor shoved him hard instead, hoping he would fall to the ground. Jake barely lost his balance from the action, pissing Connor off more.

“Look. I can’t take out his brother until Evan starts dating. Apparently, his parents got this rule where they-” Jared said

Connor interrupted, “Touching story. Not my problem,” He pulled the strap of his bag over his head and started walking away, flipping Jake off.

“Would you be willing to make it your problem if I provide generous compensation?” Jake called, a certain tone in his voice.

Connor paused, mid getaway.

“You’re going to pay me to take out some guy?” Connor asked over his shoulder, not wanting to turn around and look the creep in the eye.

“Mmm hmm,” Jake said.

Connor’s eyes locked onto the Evan kid, still walking around. He looked awkward and sad and desperate and nervous.

“How much?” Connor asked

“20 bucks.” Jake offered

He watched as Evan bumped into someone, his face turned bright red and he seemed to stammer through a few sentences at the person he bumped into before he ran off.

“Fine. 30.” Jake said, quickly revising.

“75 bucks.” Connor threw back, finally turning back towards Jake. His parents cut off his funds a while ago and he was in desperate shape for pot money.

“This isn’t a negotiation. Take it or leave it, freak.” Jake said, looking Connor up and down.

“50 bucks and we’ve got a deal,” Connor snapped back, crossing his arms, scowling.

Jake shrugged and reached into his wallet, pulling out a 50 dollar bill. He handed Connor the money.

Stupid rich fuck

Connor allowed himself for a second to forget that his family was probably wealthier than this guy’s.

“I’ll be back for an update,” Jake said then turned and walked away.

Connor stared down at the easiest 50 bucks he ever made. He pocketed the money and rolled his eyes. If that moron seriously thought that he was actually going to do this, he truly was a moron. Connor snorted, he was just going to blow this whole thing off and that Jake guy could just kiss his ass.

Connor stuffed the money into his pocket then started to walk off. His eyes glanced over to where the girl Evan had bumped into stood, noisily gossiping about “the weirdo that just ran into her.” He frowned.

…Connor was going to need more money for weed pretty soon. 50 bucks really wasn’t going to last him long…plus he was going to need gas money to get to his dealer's house…

Fuck.

Evan kept chanting in his head that the day was almost done and he could leave school soon. Things had gone…alright, today. Nothing too horrible. He was happy to not have to lie to Dr. Sherman about it at therapy tomorrow.

Evan put his Spanish and calculus textbooks into his locker. He stuffed his binder and a few notebooks into his backpack then shut the door, pushing hard to make sure it closed all the way. He turned around and saw someone right behind him. Evan jolted back in surprise, hitting the lockers. Evan felt his face heat up in embarrassment. His eyes slowly slid up from the black combat boots all the way up to Connor Murphy’s face.

Connor gave an awkward, thin-lipped smile, “Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you.”

“No, n-no that's okay- it’s-it's okay,” Evan said, try to calm down his racing heartbeat.

Connor didn't move or say or do anything. They stood there for a second before Evan got uncomfortable and reached over to pick at his cast.

“Hey, you still got my name,” Connor said, pointing towards Evan’s arm. Evan glanced down then back up at Connor for half a second. His hand started to trace the lines of Connor’s name scrawled on his cast.

“Uh, yeah. I don’t- I don't get the, uh, cast off for a few more weeks or maybe even another month, the doctors haven't told me yet when it's gonna be yet but I'm sure I'll find out soon, hopefully pretty soon, and its sharpie so uh yeah...can't really take it off.” Evan said a mile a minute.

He couldn’t tell if Connor’s expression was annoyance, amusement, or both, “I was just kidding.” He offered.

“Oh huh…yeah, ye-yeah I knew that,” Evan said, hands pulling at the hem of his shirt, trying to laugh it off. He looked down at the ground, feeling stupid.

He chanced a glance back up at Connor. Why was he still standing there? This was so uncomfortable, he didn’t know what to say or do or think. He rubbed at his face.

“So, um, do you want to hang out sometime?” Connor asked, eyes glancing around the hallway.

Evan stiffened up and slowly tilted his head to eye at Connor.

He let out a small, uncomfortable laugh, in a very Evan fashion, “Um uh um, n-no thanks. It’s because um- it’s not because of any reason or anything. I’m-I’m-I’m just really busy right now and I need to um help my mom after school and do homework so I can't do that.” Evan lied a mile a minute, worrying his shirt again, avoiding eye contact.

There was another awkward pause. “Okay, well see you around,” Connor said with a shrug and a wave.

Evan watched him leave, staring him down in confusion. That was bizarre, to say the least. Evan had spent most of the school years trying to avoid Connor, and now in less than a month had interacted with him twice.

Connor was definitely different that sophomore year. Evan just couldn’t put his finger on why.

“We’re screwed,” Michael said, exasperated.

He and Jared had been trailing Connor the whole day, seeing when he was going to make his move on Evan. The interaction between Evan and Connor had gone about as well as expected. Why the hell did Michael think this was going to work? Everyone was terrified of angry Connor Murphy and all the vicious rumors, whether truthful or lies, that trailed after him.

“Hey, no, hey. I don’t want to hear that defeatist attitude.” Jared turned to him, putting his hands on his shoulders and shaking him “I want to hear you upbeat.”

“We’re screwed!” Michael said with mock enthusiasm.

“There you go!" Jared said, stooping to his level of sarcasm. "Just give him time. Evan just has to realize that Connor isn’t going to give up and he’ll eventually just go out with him to make him stop asking since it makes him uncomfortable or something like that.” Michael felt like Jared was trying to explain this to him like he was a small child that had no clue what was happening.

“I hope you’re right, man.” Michael sighed and quickly made their way to their separate classes when the bell rang.

Jeremy was walking down a hallway in the school, finally feeling like he was getting a handle on his schedule and the school layout. He was glancing down at his phone, shooting Michael a quick message about hanging out this weekend and happened to glance up as he rounded a corner.

There was Jake. Handsome as hell Jake. No one should be allowed to be that absolutely perfect looking and- Jake was looking at him. Jake was looking at him! Jeremy’s heart immediately leapt to his throat. Jake gave him a charming smile and sauntered across the hallway to him. Jeremy thought his legs might give out from under him.

“Hi,” Jake said, stopping right in front of him.

“Hey,” Jeremy said, feeling giddy as hell, but trying to be cool.

“Jeremy, right?” He asked.

“Uh yeah.” Jeremy nearly chocked out. Jake knew his name!

“You’re the new kid, right?” Jake asked, taking a step closer so Jeremy had to tilt his head up to continue to look at his gorgeous face.

“Yeah,” Jeremy said, brain not being able to come up with a more interesting response.

“Wow, that must kind of suck. I’m Jake by the way.” Jake flashed him another dashing smile.

Jeremy said, looking down at his shoes, “I…know.”

“Cool…Can I say something stupid? I heard that my friend Rich said something to you in the hallway to you the other day and I just wanted to say I’m sorry about that.”

Oh, my god, he was literally so nice, who just did that? Apologize for a friend? Just so attractive and nice? “That’s…not stupid at all.” Jeremy said with what he hoped was a coy smile.

Jake leaned against the wall and bit his lip. Jeremy wanted to scream.

“Cool. Hey, I was wondering if you wanted to go out sometime. Like to the mall or out to eat? I figured we could get to know each other. Alone. I could take you to my friend Rich and I’s favorite spot in the universe, Sbarro!” Jake laughed with a wink.

No one had ever asked Jeremy out before, certainly not someone like Jake Dillinger. He was about to start nodding rapidly but then his dad's rule came rushing back to him. Jeremy wanted to scream when he remembered.

“I, um, actually can’t.” Jeremy said, feeling like an idiot, “My older brother-”

“I know about your whole dating problem and have a guy working on it as we speak.” Jake raised his eyebrow and flashed a beautiful grin.

“Oh.” Jeremy was shocked. Jake must honestly, truly want to go out with him if he was willing to find someone to date Evan.

Jake reached out and ran a hand down Jeremy’s shoulder to his hand, holding it after. Jeremy's shuttered and goosebumps popped up all over his skin.

Jake looked down at their conjoined hands then back up at Jeremy through his lashes, “So how about it?”

“Sure, okay.” Jeremy managed to get out.

“Alright,” Jake said and handed Jeremy a slip of paper with his phone number on it. He winked and continued his stroll down the hallway.

Jeremy shuttered out a breath, feeling like he might explode, and watched Jake go.

Evan was curled up in his bed, just finished with all his homework for the night, scrolling through his phone. This was simultaneously the best and worst part of the whole day. School was over and Evan had the rest of the day to do whatever he wanted…the only problem was there was nothing for him to do.

He usually just went in an endless cycle of refreshing Twitter, Facebook, and Instagram for hours.

Jared was usually the person who posted the most on all on social media. Game stats and scores, complaining about teachers and dragging classmates, stuff like that. Zoe posted pictures of her and Alana or videos of her jazz band playing. Alana liked to have friendly debates on threads and write all about her extracurriculars and studying. Chloe and Brooke put up selfies, vague-posted about everyone at the school, and reposted makeup tutorials, he wasn’t quite sure why he followed them, or the other popular people at his school. Probably just to fill time and space on his accounts.

He finished rewatching all the Snapchat stories, feeling a little bored.

It was kind of a weird feeling. Evan really wanted to be a part of what was going on, at all the parties he saw and all the events people posted about and hanging out with all the people he was friends with online. But at the same time, he didn’t feel like it would work out that well. He’d be too anxious to have a good time and everyone would think he was weird and it just wouldn’t end well.

He just liked to pretend that maybe it could.

For once.

Go well.

Evan got up out of bed and left his room to use the bathroom. He stared down at his phone as he went. He finally looked up once he reached one of the porcelain sinks.

He brushed his teeth and contemplated a shower. He’d have to wrap his arm up and tape it and that really didn’t sound that fun right now, so maybe just a shower tomorrow. Evan turned away from the sink and jumped in surprise. Jeremy was standing in the doorway.

“He-Hey Jeremy,” Evan said, trying to play off the fact that he had been scared.

“Hey,” Jeremy said with a nod.

Evan grabbed a washcloth from the counter and ran it under warm water. Jeremy moved up to the other sink, applying acne cream to his face.

They stood there in a silence. It probably wasn’t that awkward but Evan couldn’t feel a silence any other way.

“How was-” Evan started but stopped to wipe his face with the damp washcloth. “How was school?” He eventually got out.

“Classes were fine. Jake Dillinger talked to me today.” Jeremy said, trying to sound calm and casual but coming across as anything but.

“Cool. That’s-That’s nice.” Evan said, then rubbed the cloth in circles on his mouth so he didn’t have to say anything else.

More silence.

Jeremy finished up his routine with brushing his teeth and flossing before he turned to leave. He stopped and eyed Evan up and down.

“Have you ever tried something that wasn’t khakis and polos, Evan?”

Evan’s face was already bright red from scrubbing it for so long, Jeremy probably couldn’t see his embarrassment.

“Not…not really. I like…blue polos.”

“People at school would probably think you’re cooler if you did,” Jeremy said like it was a fact.

This was…bizarre. Why did Jeremy care if people thought he was cool? Was he really so embarrassing to be tethered to as a stepbrother that Jeremy wanted him to wear different clothes?

“I-I-I don’t- I don’t care what those people-people think,” Evan said, voice breaking a little.

Jeremy scrunched his eyebrows together, “Well maybe you should.” Jeremy walked out of the bathroom. Evan stood there, taken back by how random this was. Maybe someone had said something to Jeremy at school. Maybe Jake had said something to him. Maybe he was getting bullied by other people because of Evan. He suddenly felt really guilty. He hadn’t meant for that to happen.

Evan threw his washcloth in the laundry hamper and hung his head as he made his way back to his bedroom. He laid back down on his bed and pulled up Twitter again. He didn’t scroll. Who could be bullying Jeremy? There weren’t a ton of actual bullies at school, just people who were gossiping jerks. Evan stared at his phone screen until it timed out and the screen went dark. He told himself to just try and focus on something else.

School?

No…that’s where the jerks were.

Summer?

Not the best memories from that time.

Zoe Murphy?

Probably best to stay away from that for a while…

…Connor Murphy?

Wait! No! Wondering mind was a bad idea. Evan rolled over and pulled the blankets over his head.

Today at school, when Connor had asked him to hang out. That had to have been some kind of joke. Maybe Connor was trying to mess with him and get everyone to see that he was just a bigger loser than everyone already thought. Evan’s stomach filled with dread. That was probably it.

There’s no way Connor would – that anyone would – want to hang out with him.

#be more chill #dear evan hansen #boyf riends #tree bros #richjake #pinkberry #zolana #galaxy gals #deh #bmc #AU fanfiction #fanfic

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sickofyourfandombullshit · 7 years

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Heathers 2018

So when I saw @princess-has-a-pen post about the new Heathers remake I had to look it up for two reasons:

1. I’m a huge fan of the Movie and Musical and 2. I had to see the fucking horror show that Spike TV was no doubt going to turn it into.

Now Princess asked in their tags the exact same thing I asked myself when I saw the post:

“Why?”

Well friends, strap yourselves in cuz I’m about to take you for a fucking ride.

Why remake Heathers? A movie that has solidified itself as a cult classic for it’s gritty, fucked up story and characters that took pretty much every kid who went to high school in the 80′s (or any time really) life and amped it up to 11?

Cuz the original Heathers is full of 'problematic' things and they can now remake it to be more 'progressive' while snagging a new audiance of younglings who know about Heathers because of the musical.

Now my friends, as I stated before, I love both the movie and the Musical, but as a mature, rational fan over the age of 30, I can look at something I love and point out it’s flaws and believe me, when it comes to the source material, Heathers the Musical is stuffed full of flaws and that creates some problems.

I am pretty sure all the Tumblrinas who idolize ‘Heathers’ have only seen the musical because honestly, the ‘date’ scene where Heather McNamara gets raped in the background would be enough to make them REEEEEE all the way to the fucking bank.

Like legit, she is literally struggling under her date (and not in a fun way) to make him stop and Veronica just fucking leaves her there. We don’t see her get away or anything, so you can only assume that that whole thing didn’t end well, especially given how miserable McNamara is in the movie to begin with.

The Muscial made light of a lot of the grim parts the movie worked to highlight, specifically bullying and suicide and the dangers of giving into pressure and just being a fucking terrible human being. Not to mention it twisted things in a way that actually reinforced some harmful tropes. Specifically with the two main characters JD and Heather.

JD in the movie is a completely sociopath who physically and mentally abuses Veronica for almost the entire thing and in the Musical they gave him the stereotypical ‘troubled boy who wanted to make the world better but it just got out of hand’ treatment. Like “Oh yeah, he murders three people and tries to blow up a school but his dad’s a jerk and his mommy committed suicide so you can’t blame him! Deep down he’s just a tortured soul who really loves Veronica!”. Spoilers! He doesn’t love Veronica, at least not in any way that should be even entertained as any sort of ‘love’. He and Veronica’s relationship coupled with his ‘sacrifice’ at the end of the play made me cringe extra hard because it felt like it was romanticizing abusive relationships and in all honesty it was. A specific scene from the Musical where I thought they were actually going to address the toxicity of their ‘relationship’ (at the end of the ‘Our Love is God’ musical number where Veronica seems to have a mental break down as she screams ‘Our Love is God’ over and over again as if to drown out the fact that she just assisted in the murder of two people), was brushed under the rug the next scene and seemingly forgotten about till something ELSE big happens and then it’s fucking Ground Hogs Day apparently.

Veronica in the movie joined the Heathers before the movie even began because she wanted to be popular and due to her skill in forgery is pretty much made their pet project. She’s not as much of a cunt as Chandler or Duke but she's still pretty fucking bad. She kills Kurt herself, blows off her actual best friend in exchange for shallow popularity, laughs over Heather Chandler dying and only turns on JD when the suicide note she writes for Heather Chandler backfires and causes people to glorify Chandler as a saint. This as well leads her to realize that it’s pointless to kill people because someone else just takes their place as “The Mythic Bitch” ala Heather Duke’s transformation (also because JD straight up slaps her in the face for trying to back out on him). She only ever does anything semi sweet at the VERY end after JD gets blown up. In the Musical she is portrayed as a sweet innocent little buttercup who is super besties with Martha and sticks up for the little guy and never meant to hurt anyone and was just dragged into everything bad by bad people. She feels constantly guilty for it and seems unable to make any actual choices herself outside of breaking into JD’s house to fuck him. She’s totally innocent guys. Totes.

And before you say “C’moooon it’s a fuckin’ Muscial!” you need to go watch you some Dear Evan Hansen or Les Miserables because those two Musicals are heavy as fuck and had no problem in showing how fucked up serious shit like war and suicide was through flawed characters.

Now with this new series coming out it seems destined to fail. It has only been releasing Instagram videos to promote the show and already it’s hitting all the same old PC points while being SO EDGY at the same time. It’s Riverdale all fucking over again.

“The terrible trio is more like a set of outcasts who have taken over Westerberg High School.” -EW article

Like really? Fuckin’ really? The Heathers were all popular girls due to their wealth (McNamara), beauty (Duke) and over all exuding of confidence and attitude backed up by all of the previously stated assets (Chandler). They weren’t a bunch of outcasts. They took pride in how they looked and how people saw them. I don’t understand this fucking need to make every kid nowadays an ‘outcast’ in an effort to make them ‘relatable’. They did it to every kid in the Power Rangers remake and MJ in Spider-Man: Homecoming and it’s starting to get fucking annoying. Oh well, gotta get them kids with all that EDGE!

So let’s look at the ‘Heathers’ (I can’t bring myself to not put that in quotation marks when talking about these piles of hot garbage):

Heather Chandler is a plus-sized, Skrillex haired edge lord who looks like every Tumblr Feminist/Suicide Girls reject and literally gives off no aura of power or fear at all. She just comes off as some fat bitch who found the HAAS RadFem movement on Twitter and used it to fill herself with enough undeserved self importance to justify being a cunt to everyone. Yes, where the original Heather Chandler got her power and reputation through sheer intimidation and personality, this Heather Chandler looks like the type of girl who will physically assault you in the bathroom and threaten to sit on you till you die.

Gee golly, I see Heather Duke is a sassy gay male now (and a white one at that). Wow, it’s not like that hasn’t been done a billion fucking times. Funny that he’s a white dude whose character in the movie and play turns out to capitalize on Heather Chandler’s death to raise their own status to the ‘queen bitch’ of the school. That’ll do GREAT for gay stereotypes I’m sure.

Aaaaand Heather McNamara, our possibly Asian possibly Latinx butprobably just party bag of mixed race token character who is the literal punching bag of the group. At least that seems to have not changed but I am sure it’ll help add shallow sympathy since now it’s not a bunch of white kids beating up on a little white girl, it’s a bunch of white kids beating up on a little minority girl. Goodie goodie.

The rest:

JD literally gets nothing to show from his video except one speaking line where he is telling Veronica that she’s “Not like Heather Chandler” she’s “better” while quick cutting a bunch of random shots from the show that mostly seem pointless and just confusing with one flash of him apparently running the flat of a knife on his palm behind his back? So we get nothing from our poor, tortured sociopath. I can just hear the producers of this show now: “We can’t show him being too soft or the old fans might not watch it and can’t show him being a psychotic asshole or the Musical fans won’t watch it, so make it just as cluster fucking and confusing as possible so no one will ask questions and just be drawn in with all the cheap visual click bait!”

For Veronica we again get nothing. One line of “Dear Diary, I hate my friends but that doesn’t mean I want them DEAD!” followed by more random cuts of shots from the show, many of bloody scenes and hints of violence but a lot more of just weird confusing scenes that make no sense. It’s kind of funny for the sheer reason that they seem to be banking on people just already knowing who these characters are ala the original movie but at the same time are trying to pull in new audience members with all the vague quick cutting which they seem to have mistaken for ‘mystery’.

And last but not least, we have Betty Finn. What’s that? “Who if Betty Finn?” all you fans of the Musical ask? Well you wouldn’t know who Betty is unless you watched the MOVIE cuz Betty is who Martha Dump Truck replaced in the Musical because Betty wasn’t fucking sad sacky enough and they didn’t want to clutter the script with such a minor character. Betty was smart and an actual good person, the only good person in the movie honestly, who was Veronica’s friend since they were in diapers. She didn’t have a huge part in the movie outside of providing some blackmail material for JD to use against Heather Duke and trying to get Veronica to stop being such a moron (which failed). Now she’s appears to be the stereotypical side character that will be prominent in the show, probably as a comic relief character or plot device to be used against Veronica at some point.

Now, there is a huge question you have to ask:

Where is Martha? Will Martha even be in the series? Alright, it’s two questions but you get the point.

I have two guesses;

1. Possibly

but more than likely

2. No. Absolutely not.

Why do you ask? Because Martha’s character served as a plot device in both the Movie and the Musical to show how awful the Heathers really were and how their bullying was actually dangerous. Martha was a fat, slow, ugly dump of a girl. Problem is, you can’t make fun of that anymore. It’s not ‘progressive’ to make fun of people with those flaws. As well it wouldn’t make sense, Heather Chandler is fat in this remake. Unless they’re going to go full retard with some kind of ‘internalized fatphobia’ shit it wouldn’t make sense to make fun of Martha for that. Heather McNamara is the stereotypical ditzy airhead which doesn’t seem to have changed in this remake so to make fun of someone being ‘slow’ while laughing at an Air-Head-of-Color would just be super duper mean!

If they DO put Martha in, she will either have to still be dumpy, slow and fat and end up being the most popular character in the end for ‘not giving into societies beauty standards’ or some shit, OR she will have to actually flat out die from her suicide attempt to push the EDGE and drive plot.

Either way this whole thing is going to be a train wreck that will either take off at the idiotic rate in which Teen Wolf and Riverdale did or be an utter failure.

I seriously hope for the latter. Sorry this is so long and there are probably some spelling and grammar errors. It’s literally 2:30 in the morning and the Monster I drank is starting to ware off so I’m running on fumes.

#heathers 2018 #heathers #heathers the musical

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prompt-master · 7 years

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Dear Evan Hansen Headcanons

- Jared once bought heelies because as the school funnyman it’s practically his job- but then he rolled down a ramp and crashed into a fountain

- when Connor was alive he punched a kid who made fun of his black nail polish

-Evan has both a fidget cube and spinner, but uses the cube more often. Jared used to tease him for it but then he saw how much it helped Evan and let the boy be free

-Evan has actually been handling his anxiety a lot better since the whole Connor project incident, and it makes Heidi and Jared so happy because: you’re doing great sweetie look at you go

-it took Evan a really long time to tell Jared how he actually broke his arm and when he did it was very a random very fast word vomit while they were hiking.

-Evan falling out of the tree is now the one thing Jared will not make fun of

-Jared once tried to ask Evan out and ended up screaming “YOU WANNA GO” at him and Evan instantly thought Jared wanted to fight and was Afraid

-things were incredibly awkward with Zoe for a long time. Most of the time they accidentally met in the orchard and Evan would always, without fail, start apologizing. Zoe is so used to it that whenever she sees Evan she instantly says “it’s ok.”

-Heidi takes as many days off as she can but she’s still really busy, whenever she’s home she’s making all of Evan’s favorite foods and they chill out and watch cop shows

-Heidi usually asks how Evans day went and if he’s doing ok, and Evan makes sure she’s not over exhausting herself

-One time in the middle of Evan’s routinely “I’m sorry I fucked up so bad” speeches Zoe suddenly asked “so you wrote that letter?”

-Evan didn’t go to the orchard for a week after that he was so shook

-whenever someone accidentally steps on the back of Evan’s shoes he loses his shoe, everything in his pockets, and face plants

-Jared is gonna make fun of Evan until he dies but if anyone else does Jared will personally show up to your room that night and end you

-Zoe actually helped to mend their very awkward relationship by making stupid jokes before Evan could open his mouth and after that they were able to just have a comfortable silence

-Jared is the living embodiment of “I made you a friendship bracelet” “lol that’s so stupid” “you don’t have to we-” “NO IM NEVER TAKING IT OFF”

-he may or may not have a few of Evans friendship bracelets around his ankle

-after middle school Jared actually got really afraid of being bullied, so when high school started he upped his teasing to the next tier

-Evan tries really hard to comfort Jared when he feels like shit- which is more often than you’d think- but it’s just so hard to tell when he is and he always throws it off with a dumb joke

-one time Jared teased Evan about the Connor project, and went too far, Evan didn’t speak to him for the rest of the day, Jared almost cried

- sometimes when he can tell Evan is having a rough day he invites him to places randomly- “hey so all my totally awesome friends bailed on me for the mall, and I figured you’d wanna go since you have no life or whatever”

- alternatively Evan sits by Jared and makes awkward small talk, and just gives the boy a chance to tell him what’s wrong. He’ll give him his cube if Jared seems especially anxious

-Zoe once asked Evan if anything he told her was true, and he told her about the printer story. She seemed somewhat happy that Connor cared she was in the letter.

-Zoe once stabbed Connor in the eye with mascara and still finds it one of the funniest memories of him

-Zoe is a music depression person, she sits in her room with music full blast a lot

-“wait Zoe you know that you don’t have to like forgive me and be friends with me right like that’s totally ok i know I screwed up so-” “I know, I also don’t have mourn Connor” “…so why are you at the orchard so much”

-she never explains this

-one time Jared jumped on Evans back and they both ended up in a river

-he knows Evan has the strength to hold him up and dammit he’s gonna prove it

-one of the things Evan doesn’t regret about the Connor project is his speech because he still gets messages of the video thanking him and telling him how helpful it was

-Evan really wants a hamster, like really fucking badly

-Jared constantly greets people with “sup I’m gay” or “sup Hereros”

-Jared also constantly points out hot guys in hopes that Evan will agree because he can’t tell if Evan really is bi or not he just gets bi vibes from him

-“hey can you help me find updog” “what is..updog…?”

- this happens with Bofa too

- Connor used to be the master of avoiding situations. If you tried to have a serious conversation with him he’d either distract you or you’d turn around and he’d just be gone.

- he also does this thing where he pulls his hoodie up and pulls the strings whenever he just can’t deal with how stupid this is

-Jared was the first to drive and oh god what a mistake that was, he’s terrible

-Zoe once laughed really hard and spat gum at a teacher by accident

-one time while hiking with Evan he reached over and ate a leaf and Evan can’t even look at him the same way- what is wrong with you, Jared

- operation ask Evan out part 2- Jared tried to let Evan come to him because who wouldn’t you know? Then Zoe explained that she solidified the relationship- so he took Evan to the park but ended up eating too many chili dogs and throwing up on the curve when he got nervous. He was still trying to ask him out while hurling

-Alana becomes Number One Leader, she’s great at it, she’s learned to listen to other people more often.

-she hangs out with Jared and Evan a lot, she usually organizes the hangouts

-was voted most likely to succeed in life and honestly? It was probably unanimous

- Jared and her are in the “Evan was a dick to me” club and have tshirts

- eventually they let Zoe into their club

-one time they were hanging out and invited Zoe without Evan knowing and Evan nearly jumped out a window he ran away so fast

- Alana saw Zoe’s stars on her jean cuffs and got so happy “oh my god that’s such a great idea it looks so cute!” “Oh thank you it’s just-” “do you mind if I do it too?” “Not at all but why-” “do you have a marker?”

- Evan can’t tie his shoes

- Alana ends up uploading a bunch of videos of Zoe playing songs, and they get some good attention. Zoe was shocked but Alana just explained that it was inevitable

-Jared goes through everyone’s phones and changes people’s contact names to memes

- “Evan stop apologizing so much” “I’m sorry-” “Evan no. None of that. Please” “ok ok I’m sorr-” “EVAN”

- Evan and Alana hate litter. Like a lot. Jared will never understand it but whenever the two are out they’re just picking up all the litter they find and throw it out.

-Jared once made a joke “maybe you guys should just carry around bags to carry garbage in”

-After they started doing this Jared made another joke: “why don’t you two make a recycling project”

-after Alana and Evan become save the world co-presidents Jared learned he really needs to stop joking.

-Jared cried when he graduated

#dear evan hansen #headcanons #I'm sorry this is so long I wrote this on the bus #I like to think that I'm funny and creative ahhh #I have more.

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