#daniel is fucking hilarious please let him live
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mamma mia! - part three
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mia tate do you think i would go to german jail for punching a reporter in the face?
daniel ricciardo please tell me you haven't already done that.
mia tate no.
mia tate but hypothetically speaking, if i did, it was because he asked me a really gross question and he was annoying.
max verstappen oh my god. this is hilarious. please tell me you did.
charles leclerc she did. it's on twitter.
daniel ricciardo is this why fernando was cackling earlier??
mia tate yes, and he also pulled me away from the reporter before he could punch me. hypothetically speaking
max verstappen alright, i'm settling this the only way daniel has taught me
max verstappen added two people
mia tate well you got one thing right, you are motorsports biggest headache.
max verstappen i didn't add you so i could be bullied. i added you so that someone could fucking explain what happened earlier. christian is glaring at me and i had nothing to do with this
lando norris oh she rocked the shit out of that reporter.
alex albon who taught you to punch and can they teach me?
mia tate my ex boyfriend
george russell well that took a turn
mia tate AND NOT IN THE WAY YOU GUYS THINK!! I LIVE IN NEW YORK! ONE WRONG MOVE AND THEY'LL MUG ME!
abigail tate you idiot.
fernando alonso oh it was great maxie, the reporter said some things i will not be repeating, it went on for ages and mia took it like a champ until finally he asked a really gross question and she punched him. i think abigail almost bit him, or that's what twitter is saying.
fernando alonso being the driver closest to them i stepped in when he looked like he was going to hurt mia and abigail. sebastian vettel, being the great guy he is, called security on the guy before you could show up and go all mad-max on him.
max verstappen i would not have done that.
daniel ricciardo oh my god
lance stroll oh this just made my day so much better.
sebastian vettel lance, not the time
lance stroll i feel like i should be honest. they should know the mess they're getting into.
pierre gasly how is this whole thing going to work? like is mia moving to monaco or are the three stooges moving to new york?
charles leclerc she just said we could get mugged! i am not moving to new york
max verstappen what? your pretty face can't take a hit?
charles leclerc are you flirting with me?
abigail tate how have you two not fucked? matter of fact how has max not fucked daniel or charles?
lando norris THAT'S WHAT I'VE BEEN SAYING!! JUST FUCK EACH OTHER AND GET RID OF THE SEXUAL TENSION!
mia tate why would i move to monaco??
daniel ricciardo because that's where we live? you could bring your emotional support
mia tate bunch of tax evaders you people are. a french, an aussie, and a dutch, who would've thought?
charles leclerc I'M MONEGASQUE!!
mia tate TAX EVADER!!
charles leclerc I WAS BORN THERE!! MAX AND DANIEL ARE THE TAX EVADERS!!
max verstappen AND YOU'RE JUST AN INCHIDENT BITCH!
sebastian vettel can you stop acting like children?
esteban ocon i'm not even religious but i pray for that child's sanity
charles leclerc sorry seb
max verstappen sorry seb
mia tate for the record, i'm not sorry
daniel ricciardo i, for once, did nothing wrong
mick schumacher can i be godfather?
max verstappen you're a child?? how are you supposed to look after another child
mia tate but he's so adorable? how can i say no to him??
charles leclerc by saying no??
mick schumacher haters. let me have this one thing
carlos sainz let me be godfather. i'm charles teammate.
daniel ricciardo we are not having this conversation right now. max has been silently plotting how to murder a reporter. can everyone please focus?
max verstappen yes, like what was his name?
sebastian vettel NO MURDER!
mia tate wow, you really are a dad.
sebastian vettel someone has to be the responsible one here and it's not fernando, kimi, or lewis.
kimi raikkonen 👍
kimi raikkonen 🤰🏼?
lewis hamilton yes kimi, the girl is pregnant
kimi raikkonen 🦥 🦡 🏎️?
lewis hamilton yes, no one knows who that dad is yet. it's either max, daniel, or charles.
kimi raikkonen 😂
abigail tate how did you get that from a few emojis?
lando norris max is the sloth because he's sid from ice age
max verstappen fuck you norris
george russell daniel is the badger because people call him honey badger
alex albon and charles is the car because of this
mick schumacher does that make mia, sally?
abigail tate OH MY GOD THIS IS GREAT!
mia tate CODE DAD ABBY! CODE DAD!
lance stroll what the fuck is code dad? is she going into labour?
lando norris don't be ridiculous, she's only a month pregnant. their dad is probably here.
lando norris OH SHIT! EVERYONE RUN FOR COVER!
mia tate don't be so dramatic. he's not an asshole, he never abused us. he just had bigger dreams for us and when we failed to do what he wanted he disowned us.
sebastian vettel that's still not good mia. he left you two when you needed him. you're children.
kimi raikkonen 🤬
esteban ocon even kimi agrees, which is a first
esteban ocon uh oh sebastian has adopted two more kids. mia and abigail, welcome to the family
lance stroll he’s only known them 2 hours??
esteban ocon the girl is pregnant because of his former teammate and the mini versions of him. he’s attached lance.
mia tate he was a single dad raising three kids under the age of 8. he tried his best sebastian. it may not have been the best but i turned out alright, jury's still out on abby.
daniel ricciardo do you two need anything? like do you need us to keep him away from you two?
abigail tate we'll be okay danny, besides, i think sebastian and fernando have made it their mission to be our personal bodyguards. like mia said, he was never a bad father, he just made some mistakes.
robert tate why did i just get asked around the paddock if i was excited to be a grandfather? who got someone pregnant or who's pregnant?
abigail tate i forgot we let the idiot name this chat.
marc tate take that fucking back! i am a stressed medical student in his final year of school, let me fucking be.
robert tate AM I GOING TO BE A GRANDFATHER?? YES OR NO??
marc tate do you think i have time to date?? much less sleep around? wasn't me.
abigail tate kids are icky.
robert tate mia?? is it you??
mia tate mia can't come to the phone right now. please leave a message after the beep. love, the war criminal.
marc tate war criminal?? what the hell have you two been up too.
mia tate mia is unavailable - seb
mia tate 🖕- 7️⃣
abigail tate her phone's been hijacked by three world champions.
marc tate YOU GUYS ARE AT SPA??
marc tate THE ONE WEEKEND I CHOSE NOT TO GO WITH DAD??
abigail tate what the fuck happened to 'i'm a medical student, i have no life?'
marc tate school does not matter when it comes to f1.
mia tate DAD! I FUCKED UP! I WENT TO GREECE, SLEPT WITH A FEW PEOPLE AND NOW I'M PREGNANT! - MIA
mia tate SHE'S LYING - WAR CRIMINAL
robert tate abby?
abigail tate oh, she's not lying. CONGRATS YOU'RE GOING TO BE A GRANDFATHER!!
marc tate oh my god she's the girl that f1 twitter is losing it's mind over?
abigail tate congrats your grandchild is either half honey badger, half mad-max, or half il predestinato. we're not quite sure who the dad is.
marc tate HOW DOES IT FEEL TO LIVE MY DREAM MIA!!
robert tate abby, is she okay? our problems aside, for once, how is she?
abigail tate she's fine or at least as well as anyone who is faced with this current situation is. ignoring the sexist and misogynistic comments people seem to throw at her. she punched a reporter today, i almost bit his ankles (in theory).
robert tate can we talk? all three of us?
mia tate if you want to talk to mia, you're going to have to apologize for your actions and choices against her and abby. - seb
mia tate MAN UP AND APOLOGIZE TO YOUR DAUGHTERS! - WAR CRIMINAL
mia tate mia will talk to you but i will be present. there is no excuse for what you did to your children. - seb
abigail tate so that's why they call him paddock dad
mia tate heyyyy - charles
mia tate pleasure to meet you two! hi abby! - daniel
mia tate why does charles get to be called il predestinato but i get stuck with mad max? it's not fair! - max
mia tate i swear to god if one more driver steals my phone i will be committing crimes against them.
robert tate okay. i made choices i'm not proud of and i will take responsibility for my actions. i have been going to therapy now. i can see where i made mistakes.
mia tate wow. it's almost like mom leaving didn't just affect us and it affected you too. WHICH IS WHAT I'VE BEEN FUCKING SAYING FOR YEARS!
marc tate oh that she has been saying. therapist also said that dad was afraid of you and abby leaving so he pushed you two away. it's not an excuse btw, that's what dad's told me. look at that maybe we should all go to therapy.
abigail tate maybe max can join us!
mia tate fuck you - max
abigail tate wow is that any way to talk to your sister-in-law verstappen??
mia tate MIA'S MOVING TO MONACO! - CHARLES
robert tate what the fuck?
mia tate I HAVEN'T EVEN THOUGHT ABOUT IT! THE ANSWER IS NO!
mia tate FOR NOW! - CHARLES
marc tate well, this family has a lot of issues to solve.
taglist: @six-call @barcelonaloverf1life @janeholt3 @queen-aria-things @camdensreg @mycenterfold @woozarts @vellicora @nichmeddar @thisismereading @inloveallthetime @baw-sixteen @floxly @dear-fifi @chiliwhore @ilove-tswizzle
strikethrough means i couldn't tag you
¡leclerc-s speaks!
listen i needed someone who was a motorsports fan and had played a doctor and i could only think of one person, patrick dempsey. (i've never seen an episode of grey's anatomy in my life) i was also going to make him an asshole but i do that too much, so i gave him a redemption (sort of). is it a redemption? i also know nothing about therapy because i've never gone, feel free to correct me if i get anything wrong in that aspect.
¡disclaimer!
this is in no way making assumptions about the people involved in this story, this is all fake. it is a fanfiction please don't take any of what is said seriously. this is all for entertainment purposes and as a creative outlet for me. enjoy!
#leclerc-s#f1 fic#f1 instagram au#formula 1 fic#f1 smau#f1 social media au#formula 1#f1#formula one#mamma mia series#fanfic#fanfiction#daniel ricciardo x female oc#max verstappen x female oc#charles leclerc x female oc#f1 x mamma mia crossover
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- come out and play.
┈⋆⭒ daniel ricciardo x fem!reader [3.1k]
┈⋆⭒ part 2 !
.𖥔 ݁ ˖ ⎯ find all parts here !
.𖥔 ݁ ˖ ⎯ contains: none.
.𖥔 ݁ ˖ ⎯ a/n: giggling.
your head was pounding like one of those toy monkey with the cymbals and getting out of bed was a task meant for stronger soldiers. you swayed and flailed on the way to the bathroom. just in time to empty the contents of what looked like the past 3 days of food. terrific. after that endeavour you wandered into the overly silent living room, putting the kettle on. one thing you loved about England, the tea and the tea culture. chugging just shy of a litre of water with a side of ibuprofen and planting yourself on the couch where you reviewed your photos from the previous night (or morning). this was your favourite part of a night out, the quiet, looking back on the chaos that was undoubtedly the night before. it was hilarious, the ultimately blurred and nearly unrecognisable faces in all the photos was incredibly comedic. a selfie with lando was especially funny, you thought he'd been trying to take one of you and grace and it'd been his face and he was oblivious. forehead poking out of the bottom of the screen, eyebrows knitted together, and as you scrolled along the photos, he must have released and the photos became blurrier as he burst out laughing and the phone inevitably moved away from his face with a blur.
you select the photos you'd just been viewing and draft a text to lando.
10:56am
💬 attached (3) images:
💬 you should post these
putting your phone down and walking over back to the whistling kettle before deciding on popping down quickly to the bakery down the road for your admittedly pathetically triweekly double loaf of bread. you guess you could pull the " I work there " card so its not as embarrassing and you had a significant discount so why not?
you get the bread and come home, smelling your toast nearly makes you drool after the smell of harsh vodka on your breath this morning. you check your phone again.
unknown:
💬 no I think these are better
💬 attached (1) image
god you're readying yourself for the image about to be displayed. its hideous. its you and max, clearly having a somewhat heated conversation lando has managed to catch a sort of reaction photo from you, head pushed forward, eyebrows together, hands thrown up. you look outraged, and you're holding it drink rather precariously in the arm thats outstreched. definitely interesting.
💬 please ask max what he was saying here
your toast pops up and you (like a child) have one piece with peanut butter and the other with butter and vegemite. you might call it the perfect combo, others (grace) disagrees. before you can enjoy it though, lando calls you? calls you? thats a very rare occasion, you couldn't remember the last time a man called you, apart from your dad when you were 14 years old. you pick up and he's mid laugh before he feigns shock at your answering and greets you. unsure to what he actually wants to talk about you just let him ramble. he eventually gets to the point of " do you wanna come over this afternoon " and something else about having a small party before the start of the season. you weigh the idea in your hand, but when you cant find any outstanding cons you tell him yes and "what time?" to which he responds "any time around 3"
you'd said yes on a whim, knowing he was the only other person outside of grace whom you'd met in London and whom you'd became friends with. you told yourself repeatedly not to drink, or at least not to drink nearly as much as you did last night. because when tomorrow came and you had to wake up at 4am and go to work until 3pm it wouldn't be very calming or soothing to feel like what you felt three hours ago. you spend the rest of the day before landos recovering and lazing about and then ultimately at 2;30 rushing to get ready and overthinking the idea of whether or not to bring food? or a gift? was it that type of party? fuck sake. you'd decide you'd might as well bake, the idea that you'd show up to a mans house who'd you only met the night before to meet all his (probably famous) friends. yes you definitely needed to bake. so you did, something that wasn't really party related as such, bread and cookies. things you knew inside and out, something to eat the next day. bread definitely isn't "yay cocktail party" esque. in fact you hadn't really taken that into account so much as a side thought, so on you way to the party, sadly and anxiously without grace, (she was still with Jane from last night). you went past a place that did nice, fancy, albeit cheaper side salads and bought a big one that you liked. much more formula one driver guest drunk DJ esque. pulling up to lando's (and you'd recently learned also max's house) was arguably the most stressful thing you'd done in your life, and you'd been through a Melbourne private school and done half of the 2 most stressful degrees there are, oh and you broke up with your ex in a restaurant. so there's that. but this, the driving INTO his house, the steep driveway, with the gate at the top that you had to buzz into. as you'd expected the door was wide open and you could already hear the music coming from inside.
sending grace one last "pls afterwards come to landos, I don't know how I'm gonna do this without you" sounding admittedly desperate.
you walked in and upon seeing the first face of a clear stranger, turned immediately into a seperate part of the house, a conveniently placed hallway with abousltely no clues as to what was where. you get your phone out to feign some kind of importance as you remained walking forward, hoping to at least find lando and get him to introduce you or just be in front of him while you think of an excuse to go home because this was easily your most stupid decision thus far. god. you had begun to think that all hope was lost until you hear the familiar voice from behind you. you turn around.
"DYyyyyLLLAaaaNNNN" his voice wavers and he walks towards you, giving you a soft hug. a friendly hug. you converse for a few minutes where you tell him the story of the salad and make many faux apologies for anything you'd said last night. he laughs you off and brings you out to the big group of people you'd purposefully avoided just moments before. fucking great. saying big group it was only 14 people, but that was enough. sitting around a low table, couches and chairs and cushions, people were splayed out everyone. he basically took you around the circle introducing you to everyone. most people didn't look familiar, and looked more like what you'd vaguely remembered as landos "YouTube friends", that was until the end.the figure who you noticed ever since lando had walked you around the mass of people. broad and tanned and sharp, wearing a loose coloured shirt his back was turned and you couldn't see his face because his eyes were trained on the people behind him. you notice the muscles taut with the twisting motion. a strong tangible feeling in the air of familiarity.
"oi danny" a forced horrendous Australian accent coats his word and you cringe and punch his arm, glaring at him.
"christ that was fucking awful."
a different voice pipes up.
"it wasn't all bad"
him, his voice, you turn to look at him and lift your head slightly meeting his eyes. you knew exactly who he was. Australia's very own pride and joy.
"are you gonna introduce us mr Norris?" feigning the exact cluelessness you held towards lando last night
hes not breaking your gaze and its nearly painful, this unspoken thing that your both tied together by.
"alright, pipe down Danny, this is Dylan, she's a Dj" he nudges your shoulder on the last part.
oh this sick fuck.
he seems to be shocked and maybe even impressed.
"a Dj really? hi Dylan I'm Daniel"
"hes all sick and twisted, I'm definitely NOT a Dj" you turn and stare at him for that part. he just beams at you.
"but hi-yeah I'm Dylan." you do a kind of noble handshake before you both do the.
"wait you-"
"where are you from"
"Perth"
"Melbourne"
"oh the wrong side of the tracks"
"oh ha ha, lando told me last night he knew one other Australian, good to meet you, british people are driving me crazy" you look towards lando at the last part and he puts a hand on his chest.
"ohhh landos told me all about your Dj endeavours last night"
"no he hasn't" you stare at him
Daniel lets out a massive laugh, throwing his head back.
"no. he hasn't"
"do you want to though?"
"heh yeah absolutely not, maybe next time."
you all sit down on the couch together, you on the edge next to lando, Daniel leaning out so he talk to both of you. they talk about all sorts of things, mainly driving and travelling, but you don't mind. you enjoy listening and seeing kind of what people are like. you watch everyone else around you as well. you could tell the people who had been in the limelight their whole life the people who hadn't, those who would lean into the conversation, into people and those who would lean outwards into the wider space. people were interesting, they always were and with the light fading outside you couldn't face the sight that was Daniels face being illuminated by the setting sun just above the eyebrow. shining. you couldn't bear to look because you'd never be able to pull yourself away, and lando would never let you live it down.
you felt somebodys hand touch your arm, you turn to lando.
"u okay?" he asks
you realise you must look like you're in a daze or something,
"oh yeah sorry I'm fine" you snap out of it, catching Daniels eyes downcast on landos arm around your arm. you stare at him for a little longer while lando talks to you, his hand still on you arm. you only break the stare when Daniel himself snaps out of whatever daze he was in and excuses himself. before he got up you didn't notice the slight scowl he held or the biting of his cheek he enacted as he walked away. when Daniel is gone max comes over and sits on the other side of you, and his friend, who he'd introduced as clement. who surprise was a f2 driver but one who'd you thought came across as a bit dicky. yeah, no, you didn't really like him so much. the night was beuatoufl though, you couldn't ignore it, and landos backyard was about as big as a whole floor of your apartment complex. you spotted Daniel leaning against a far wall, you only saw the back of him, illuminated by the light coming from inside. you were suddenly drawn to go over to him. you excused yourself for some bullshit reason and try to discreetly make your way over to where Daniel had his head thrown back against the wall. smoking.....pot. you slide in next to him, nudging him slightly. inhaling the sense of his cologne. sandalwood? and pot.
"hi"
he looks at you.
"do you-do you want some?" he gestures his hand towards you holding the joint.
you smile and nod and he hands it over to your, your fingers grazes his as you take it from his between his fingers. you're looking at his face the whole time, scanning it, his nose, his brow bone. just about every inch is touched by your gaze. you bring it to your mouth and inhale and fight the urge to cough, you hadn't smoked since- well. a long time you guessed. you'd only taken a few hits. but then it hit you, and the warmth washed over you and you couldn't help but just grin. your eyes droopy and your smile wide as you turn you head towards him and blow the smoke into his face. giggling at his squinted eyes and screwed up nose. the giggling sound turned to a full guttural laugh and you struggled to hold it in, struggling to breath. you were gripping onto each other now, laughing and heaving holding onto his shirt pushing your face into his shoulder trying not to reveal your hiding place.
"shhhhhhh" god you're trying so hard to smother the giggles that keep leaving you, but its basically impossible when you just keep seeing his face with a shit-eating, massive grin on it. you honestly think he might be sympathetically laughing with you, you literally have to cover his face with your hands to stop yourself from laugh. hands pressed on his face, your head dug just below his chin. stifling laughter. after its all dissipated you pull away from him, grin still planted on both your faces.
"thought you were going to break my nose" he says.
"thought I was going to burst a lung"
"are you hungry?"
"yes"
you both make your way through the house, following Daniel tightly because obviously you didn't know where the kitchen was. you run into lando on the way and he stops you.
"everything alright"
"yeah sorry I left like that"
"no all good, I could see clement was making you uncomfortable"
Daniel looks at the side of your face then eyebrows drawn together, awaiting your response.
"he kept looking down my fucking shirt. dickhead"
"sorry I know hes your friend"
"max's friend" lando says
"cunt" Daniel says
" cunt" you grin at Daniel
"sorry max" you say towards lando.
"do you have any cereal lando?"
"yes children I have cereal, come on"
Daniel looks at you and smiles. you both follow lando to the kitchen, where he dramatically opens the cupboard for the cereal and you nearly jump for joy, moving your way over to where lando pointed the bowls were and grabbing 3 out while Daniel pours generous servings of dry cereal into all your bowls and lando is calling out the types of milks he has. you thank god he has oat. otherwise your cereal would've been unbearably dry. your hunched over your bowl, legs dangling off the bench, lando and Daniel sitting on opposite sides as you talk about the weird shapes the cereal is making, passing bowls around and comparing uniqueness. you had a rhino with a third horn, Daniel had a cat and lando had a weird Picasso copy. coming to the end of your bowl, you were suddenly hit by the fact you had work the next day and you still had to drive yourself home. you finish your bowl of serious and then announce this.
"okay i have work tomorrow at 4am so um I should definitely get going"
you hop off the bench, putting your bowl in the sink, and approaching lando hug him.
"thanks for coming Dylan, sorry about you know who"
" so I've got tits but yeah hes a cunt, you're not though, thanks for having me"
"bye Daniel, it was really good to meet you"
you approach him and lean into his ear.
"thanks for the pot" he beams at you at that comment. pulling back and seeing the smile on your face.
"ill walk you out to your car"
sure enough he does, you're talking mindlessly going back to his car, you mention that you work at a bakery that's why the early hours and hes actually interested. you arrive at your car door and he mentions catching up again. you say yes, but you might get busier with uni. he brings up the idea of coming to the first race of the season, insisting you couldn't pass this up and mclaren would pay for everything. you laugh him off slightly, saying it wasn't really your scene but your debating it in your head.
"it was really nice to meet you Daniel Ricciardo"
his eyes widen at the comment. you knew who he was.
"you knew who I was?"
"of course I did, im from australia too don’t forget”
“ooh but don't worry I won't tell everyone that you smoke pot and called an f2 driver a cunt"
"hey he was rightfully a cunt and i only occasionally smoke pot"
"don't I fucking know"
you climb into the drivers seat,
"bye dan"
you close and door and the whole drive home you think of him. almost dangerously, the sound of his voice, his nose, his hands, his tattoos. the way he spoke, the way he carried himself. christ it was eating you alive. but surely he wasn't thinking the same and surely he had a girlfriend. you made it home safely and appropriately at 11:35pm, securing yourself a solid 4 and a half hours of sleep before you had to be at work the next day. excited for the routine mundanity of the pastries and the doughs. no Daniel Ricciardo or lando norris' or shitty Dj's or f2 drivers. just pastries and bread. lovely.
#daniel ricciardo#daniel ricciardo angst#daniel ricciardo fic#daniel ricciardo smut#f1#f1 fic#lando norris#lando norris fic#max fewtrell#daniel ricciardo imagine#daniel riccardo x reader#daniel ricciardo series
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♡ Hospital AU Lestat and Armand 🏥💕
*DYING at you picking an AU that technically does not exist yet lmao I'm obsessed! I really did love the back-and-forth tweet fic style thing with DA + everyone else who contributed because this one is just really fun and kinky and I've missed them!!
So for the sake of headcanons, let's say they're at the point in their relationship where they just started dating. Armand and therapist!Lestat are still engaging in unethical BDSM activities in the workplace (Armand is still seeing cute anesthesiologist!Daniel on the side; he doesn't ask about Lestat's extracurriculars).
Hospital AU tag for anyone who wants to know what exactly is going on here... you'll miss some stuff if you have the default 'Mature' content filters on, go check that if you follow me please. 🥹
NSFW below the cut.
Who is the most affectionate?
It's a weird transition from "Armand bending over Lestat's lap, spreading himself open and waiting for an insertion of some sort — in a purely professional capacity, of course" to "Hey, want me to pick you up after your shift? It'll be 3am..."
At first Lestat's somewhat hesitant to cuddle Armand because Armand just looks so standoffish and disinterested sometimes (hilarious considering Lestat's already had Armand panting and rutting against his jeans while Lestat fucks him with a silicone impression of his dick right there on his therapy couch).
But he gets over it by their second sleepover and just grabs Armand in this massive bear cuddle and pins him to his chest. Armand's startled at first but then he reaches up to grip Lestat's forearms and doesn't let go. Hard to envision a world where Lestat isn't the golden retriever boyfriend, and he is definitely still the most affectionate of the two, but Armand's much more open now that Lestat's ripped that Band-Aid off for them (so to speak).
Armand showing affection looks more like kissing Lestat's temple before leaving his office after one of their "therapy sessions", sore and hazy but grateful. Wrapping his arms around Lestat's back and pressing his cheek to his middle while he's trying to cook in Armand's kitchen (the first time that apartment has seen honest to goodness food). Touching Lestat's arm when they pass each other in the hallway, Armand pretending he hadn't just gotten rug-burn 10 minutes ago while he was busy choking on Lestat's dick and squirming on cheap carpet two rooms down (jk his gag reflex is excellent).
Who initiates the handholding?
Armand's not one for PDA so it's a Big Deal when he does reach for Lestat's hand to ground himself after a particularly rough shift if they're still in public/the hospital parking lot/running errands.
He does everything he can for his patients and his job is his whole identity, so he takes it very hard when something does go wrong.
He's a long way from ever even thinking about admitting it but sometimes Lestat's large, blazingly warm hands feel like the only thing keeping him tethered to reality.
Who worries more for the other?
Lestat worries about Armand a lot because he has the unhealthiest stereotypical baby surgeon habits—thinks he's invincible and can survive on Monster energy drinks and vending machine honeybuns and a combined six hours of sleep over a three-day period. He's seen a lot of young doctors crash and burn in the couple years he's been practicing at Trinity General.
Who is more likely to ask for help?
Lestat makes his living reminding people 'there's no shame in asking for help, we're all human', but it's always easier to preach rather to practice.
I'd say they both equally suck at this for very similar reasons: ego, pride, and trauma. Imagine a psychotherapist and a cardiothoracic surgeon asking for help.
Who is the one always losing the keys?
Armand can't remember when he ate his last "meal" or the last time he slept. It's Armand. At this point he more or less lives in Lestat's townhouse out of necessity (at least until he can find time to call the super and get another key and he will Not Be Doing That).
Who leaves little love notes for the other?
Since they're in the awkward, unofficial 'I know what your face looks like when you're having a god-tier orgasm but not your favorite food or color" stage, love notes look more like Lestat texting Armand "Did you eat today? I'll Uber you something to the hospital."
Or Armand simply asking him, "Text me when you're going to bed?" (which really means "Text me when you're staying put for the night so I know you're safe wherever you are.")
Comes more naturally to Lestat though for sure.
Who can’t sleep unless the other is there?
Lestat is finding more and more lately that he sleeps the best when Armand's ass is pressed up against his stomach. Or when somehow their positions switch up during the night and he wakes up from a dream to find his head over Armand's chest and Armand's hand in his hair.
Who is more likely to propose to the other?
ashsjksksgd don't mention that word right now, they'll both run for the hills.
(Lestat. He lowkey wanted to marry Armand ever since Armand took a stethoscope to his heart right in the middle of bouncing on his cock and came hard to the sound of Lestat's heart beating right out of his chest... it's exactly the kind of freakish behavior that captured Lestat's attention permanently and also his dick. It's... unusual, make no mistake, but also pretty fucking hot.)
Who introduced the other to their family first?
It's extremely unfortunate that Lestat's mother works at the same hospital in which he fucks his coworker on the regular. She knows, because Gabrielle knows all. She is unimpressed.
We'll say Lestat, even though he wishes very much that were not the case.
Who is more likely to play with the other’s hair?
Armand's getting better and better with showing affection (he's never had to do this before, he's never been in a situationship that wasn't based purely on sex). He's learning that Lestat really responds some kind of way to Armand dragging his nails through his hair and rubbing his scalp. And by some kind of way, I mean he makes the most pathetic whining sound and looks like he's in physical pain.
Who makes sure the other has meals/stays hydrated?
See 'love notes.'
It must be noted that Lestat is not above having Armand eat from his hand like a dog while he already has him pliant over his lap and laying in his own cum in the office, too blissed out and sweet to be snarky and dismissive.
(Also, this is Lestat. He's not completely selfless, don't get the wrong idea — at least 50% of this is rooted his own desire to not only be wanted but also needed).
Who is more likely to stand up to anyone for the other?
They're both feral, it's a tie.
Who is the most likely to prepare a surprise for the other?
Armand is not a fan of surprises, thank you very much. He experiences enough shocks in his day-to-day rummaging around people's chests.
Lestat on the other hand loves a good surprise; he's always exclaiming and gasping over stuff in a very childish and endearing way. Armand picks up on this early on in their dates and tries to surprise him throughout the week with little gifts (some of the adult and provocative nature).
Who makes the other pinky promise not to do certain things?
Lestat once dared say to Armand, "Pinky promise me you won't sleep in the on-call room for the fourth night in a row because you're that stressed out about your patient?"
Armand laughed in his face.
Who puts a blanket over the other when they fall asleep on the couch?
Both of them.
Lestat hunts down Armand during his lunch breaks (super casually, if he bumps into him it's purely coincidental) and sometimes he finds him asleep in the doctor's lounge or an empty patient's room, so he'll grab a blanket from the supply closet and tuck him in.
Lestat does actually work as well, and there have been times where Armand showed up for his "appointment" to find Lestat sound asleep on a pile of paperwork. Armand still privately thinks that what he does is more important (because he's a surgeon with a God complex), but he can't deny that Lestat's job also takes a very real toll on him. Armand raids the supply closet (different one) and even manages to slip a thin hospital pillow under Lestat's head while he frowns and sighs in his sleep.
It's one of those moments where things suddenly seem a little too real for Armand, and his own heart aches in a way he's not ready to acknowledge.
#i've been dying ever since i saw this one lol i'm always drowning in I/a thoughts canon AU or otherwise my life's a mess i love them so much#hope these hit the spot <3#(hope you like these too DA thank you for playing with me and helping me build this fun little world)#you get like a co-writer's credit when i do eventually write this thing <3333#armand/lestat#fic: hospital au#ship headcanons ask meme#you ask and hekate answers
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Ideas for a ‘SAGA’ TV Show Pt.1(1/3): Voice Cast
1. Lizzy Caplan as Alana
(KNOWN ROLES: Regan Ridley from Inside Job)
REASONING:
GREAT at comedic timing and delivery!
Really good at playing tough cookies that mean well but are VERY emotionally awkward.
Memorable voice.
Hilarious when fangirling
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oFryZwddvUg (good example for why honestly)
2. Daniel Henney as Marko
(KNOWN ROLES: Tadashi Hamada from Big Hero Six)
REASONING:
Tadashi Hamada is a sweetheart, and so is Marko.
Can play supportive elder figure very well (For Hiro it was Tadashi, and for Hazel it was Marko).
Marko has a sarcastic side to him, which Daniel Henney plays can play very well.
Marko and Tadashi are supportive AF
3. Chris Diamantopoulos as Prince Robot IV
(KNOWN ROLES: Robotus from Inside Job, Mickey Mouse, Aquaman/Arthur Curry from Harley Quinn, and Green Arrow)
REASONING:
Has an AMAZING intimidating voice when playing Robotus
Great at playing characters who are easily annoyed...alot...
Intimidating
Super charming and a delight to work with behind the scenes
Needs more credit than he gets (damn you Three Stooges Movies)!!!!
Sir Robot and Robotus are both cyborgs (I think...) who know how powerful they are (yet are stopped surprisingly easily).
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZNIKhv9bbkQ&t=322s is a good example.
4. Awkwafina as Izabel
(Known Roles: Ms. Tarantula form The Bad Guys, and Sisu from Raya and the Last Dragon)
REASONING:
Super chill and super funny
Good with comedic timing
Perfect for Izabel’s laid back, ‘ride or die’ type of attitude.
Our live action sarcastic queen playing Saga’s sarcastic queen!
While her voice is great for Izabel’s savage moments, it would also be great for Izabel’s comforting/reassuring moments
5. Shoreh Aghdashloo as Petrichor
(Known Roles: Grayon from Arcane, and Avasarala from The Expanse)
REASONING:
Unique and memorable voice
Made for savage moments, which Petrichor is the living definition of.
Underrated actress for an underrated character.
Shoreh’s voice was made for badass moments that Petrichor brings to the table, no questions asked!
I wanna hear Shoreh yell ‘Please. Give me someone to fuck.’ REALLY badly!
6. Nicholas Cage as The Will
(Known Roles: Spidey-Noire from Spiderverse and an infinite number of memes).
REASONING:
It’s Nicholas Cage
Actually, a really good with emotional and/or laid-back moments.
The Will goes crazy and Nic Cage is...well...Nic Cage...
I just like Nic Cage-LET ME HAVE THIS!
We need fanart of The Will saying, ‘We don’t choice the ballroom, we just dance!’ BADLY!
7. Aisha Tyler as Gwendolyn (Gwen)
(Known Roles: Lana Kane from Archer)
REASONING:
Lana Kane is the reasonable one in the relationship who’s tires with their lover’s insanity...Which is Gwen in a nutshell (Except she also has a lust/kink for violence and murder).
Gwen needs the voice of a determined women who’s seen/survived a lot.
#saga#saga comic#Image comics saga#Alana#Lizzy Caplan#reagan ridley#saga alana#Marko#daniel henney#tadashi hamada#Saga marko#Prince robot IV#chris diamantopoulos#Robotus#Inside job#Izabel#awkwafina#Saga Izabel#Petrichor#shohreh aghdashloo#arcane grayson#Arcane Grayon#nicholas cage#spideynoir#The Will#Saga the will#Aisha Tyler#Gwendolyn#Gwen#Saga Gwendolyn
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its me 🥄 im still around im like.. on tumblr to an embarrassing degree because i have. well, problems i suppose. so rest assured i am, more often than not, seeing and enjoying the posts- i really do like all the fun stuff you find and the things you scan and the photos and gifs you post/make! also btw i just got done listening to that mount kimbie/king krule song you posted and i absolutely loved that. sorry i dont reach out much or come off anon ever its the. aforementioned problems. fun fact i live in united states central timezone (spoon technically qualifies as a semi local band to me) and have for all this time! i just dont ever sleep right haha. due to, circumstances. things sure suck and are weird huh! in a general sense. i think you can probably relate. 🫂 <- this is us if you want.
anywayyy sorry this got weird and sad lmaooo please keep listening to good music, including spoon, and posting about it so i can see!! i need to keep learning about how genuinely odd (affectionate <3) britt daniel is. something to be said for how ethereal and feylike he can come off while simultaneously being the most literally just some gen x guy ever. sir why are you willowy.. why are your features so delicate. why is your hair so downy. WHY are you wearing the lamest fit ive ever seen. and so forth, you know what i mean. i also like learning from you about what an adorable babygirlifiable dork alex fischel is which i had been sorely overlooking
obligatory ↑
but yes spoon anon i missed you so much. you are so loved. please feel free to literally say anything any time. cutting this cuz i'm gonna yap.
that description of britt is so... accurate. like nail on the head 100% truth, words taken straight from my mouth, etc. he can genuinely be so beautiful – it's actually stunning. sometimes he can look like an evil goblin lol. it's astounding. seeing it irl is kind of blinding, hypnotic in a way? he moves so fluidly and perfectly. like 100% control and command of the space he's in – he knows what he's doing. like he could just be like any other performer and just stay stood in one place barely moving – let alone interacting with any other members, which is very lovely to witness – all interaction between them is so heartwarming, like you just know they all actually love doing what they're doing and enjoy performing. they goof off sometimes, don't give a fuck when they do. it's just lovely.
and yes alex is literally the babiest girl to have ever existed imo. only one other man is that good to me but i'm not mentioning (not shameful, just don't think anybody cares. it's sebastian vettel.) that aside he is also so... bizarre? which is something even i overlooked for an extremely long time until i was like Okay what is up w this guy what is his lore. he has a deeply attention deficit riddled childlike quirkiness that i have to resonate with. his tweets on the spoon twt are really unhinged. even his personal tweets are unhinged. he says some of the most random shit sometimes in interviews. he somehow manages to look so fucking beautiful when he's bored as fuck in interviews. i made a heap of gifs from one bts video from their twms era acl performance (need to track down the full thing and make more) and he's so fucking drunk it's endearing – he's just vibing the fuck out in his own little world the entire time. in the post-show interview he's looks utterly hammered sipping from a bottomless solo cup, not saying anything.
^ literally girls when they're drunk and have no idea what anybody is saying.
it is impossible to hate him. he's genuinely hilarious and all second hand descriptions of him being an instigator and a wild man are extremely accurate. and he's also obviously extremely talented. it's so jhghd to see how -.- he kind of gets whenever britt complements him on that. i'd have to dig around but there was a lots era pod they did and britt complemented him on his ability to play guitar which is a more recent-ish thing for him and said he's better than he is and alex was like Ummm okay? that's not true -__- and it's like ohgh man.... like the first (noisy) solo on satellite is alex btw and it's good?? he even bashes himself for not being able to sing too which is such a lie he sounds like an angel whenever he does live backup... but alas. he is so loved. we love him. everyone loves him. we all know britt loves him. he is the entire universe.
also yes i will forever be posting my garbicth music need not worry... nothing will ever stop me from posting spotify links here or anywhere else. i have a massive general diary playlist of everything i listen to on a near daily basis and it's updated constantly. it's just one huge log of everything i've enjoyed since i was 16 lol. only becomes truly curated after mid 2017, though. also i apologize for the vast amount of greyed out local file tracks in that playlist but i swear a lot of them are worth tracking down if you're really interested.
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Where's My Baby? - Tommy Shelby X Reader
Requested by : Anon
Summary: Reader and Tommy Shelby have a young baby boy and one day, Tommy takes the baby out to the Garrison, only to end up forgetting the baby there and later, the reader is all worried and in tears and Tommy is angry at himself? They end up finding the baby in the end.
Warnings: Tommy being a lousy father | Garrison is still there | John never died | Grace and Charlie never happened |
Thank you to the creators for their lovely GIFs. These aren't mine. ❤️
"We are going to be fine, love. You need to go see your father." Tommy's index finger was tracing circles over the side of your neckline, his warm palm resting on your other shoulder squeezing it for support as he towered over you from your back, your body perched on a chair in the dining room with your eleven months old son, Daniel sleeping soundlessly on your chest.
Being a mother for the first time, you had your apprehensions leaving your baby alone with the household help, although you knew that Tommy was going to take good care of him. At first, you'd thought you would take Daniel with you to London but taking a small baby in a train, bringing him out to the world, was not something you wanted so early. There were all sorts of sicknesses going around outside and you felt that Daniel was the safest in the warmth of the Arrowe House.
"I don't know, Tom, I don't know if I can leave Daniel alone, what if he doesn't want to be fed ? Even the nanny called in sick today. What if he just doesn't stop crying? What if –"
"Love, calm down." Tommy walked up to your front and he knelt down in front of you, placing his palms on either of your knees, looking up into your moist eyes. "Daniel's going to be fine, I promise, I've asked Polly to come over for the day and she will take care of him."
You nodded, the corner of your lips ghosting into a frail yet reluctant smile. You knew he was right, there was no one other than Polly Gray who could take care of Daniel for you, and maybe, even better than you because she was much more experienced than you were. But parting with your baby was like pulling your heart out and handing it to someone else, even if it was for twenty four hours.
Also, there was the fact that you didn't have a choice. Your father, even though you were not on talking terms with him, ever since you had decided you wanted to get married to a Birmingham gangster– he was on his deathbed and he deserved to be given all the love he could from all of his family, at least when he was breathing his last, all past forgotten. You were already dressed and your tiny bag was already packed with a fresh set of clothes because you were only going to go for a day and be back tomorrow, the first train in the morning.
You let out a weak sigh when you saw Mary enter the dining room and clear her throat faintly.
"Mrs Shelby, I have packed your bag for you, is there anything else I can do? I can take the baby if you wish to?"
You shook your head at her, giving her a polite smile and sensing your reluctance, she gave you a brief curtsy and walked out. You finally stood up and carefully, placed your sleeping child in his father's arms, not failing to notice the way he beamed when he was holding his son.
"Tommy, love, make sure to lock the windows of his nursery at night."
"I know, and I will make sure I check his nappies otherwise he might develop a rash." He chuckled playfully, still looking down at the beautiful baby boy you two had created, together.
"Don't tease me." You muttered dryly, almost rolling your eyes at him as you leaned forward and gave your husband a soft kiss. "And please Tommy–" You pulled away, licking your lips, tasting the aftermath of Tommy's lips on you, "– Can you please not come home late tonight? For once, the work can be stalled. I don't want all the work to land on your poor aunt's shoulders. I'm already embarassed as it is. What the fuck must she be thinking? That's not even her child."
"Come on now, stop overthinking things, you know Pol loves the lad like her own."
That she did.
Daniel, ever since he was born, eleven months back, was the light of Polly's life – more so because she had never thought she would see the human side of Tommy Shelby. It awed her that day when she saw tears stream down her nephew's eyes when he heard his cries from the room upstairs for the first time.
"Well, I think I should stop stalling now." You sighed and finally took a step away, forcing yourself to look away. The more you would look at the angel in his arms, the more you will weaken in your resolve.
"I love you both." You whispered as you finally walked down the front steps of the Arrowe House towards the motorcar that was waiting at the doorstep to drop you to the station.
• ───━━━━─ ● ─━━━━─── •
"What do you mean you have to leave? Come on, Pol, you can't fucking do this to me, not today. I have a potential business partner coming in to meet me at the Garrison in two hours."
Tommy shot a helpless Polly a glare of his own, his uncontrollable pacing all over the living room not coming to a halt, his hands fixed to his hips. No, this couldn't be happening to him, he had fuckin' worked hard to get this potential client to meet him for this business meeting.
"Tommy, I'm sorry, Esme needs me. She's in pain, what the fuck do you want me to do?" Polly snapped.
"Ask her to call for a fucking doctor maybe?"
"Fuck off, Thomas Shelby. You should cancel this business meeting that you have and for once, stay home and look after your own spawn." Polly spat out the words, flinching instantly at the harshness of her own words because that is now how she had meant to take out her anger.
"Fine, get out."
Polly shook her head at the stubbornness of his nephew. When was he going to learn?
"Thomas, you have to stop with this attitude. You're a father now –"
"Aren't you getting late now? I thought John's wife needed you." Tommy cut Polly off, his fingers toying with the box of cigarettes as he pulled one out and flicked it to his lips, his fingers now shuffling through his pocket to pull out the matchbox.
"You will never learn."
Shaking her head at her nephew, she grabbed her purse, swinging it over hurriedly over her shoulder, rushing out through the front door. The door slammed shut and the sound of Tommy's match lighting echoed through the air, smoke coiling around him as he stood like a stone statue in the living room, staring into the air, smoking.
It was just a business meeting, he thought to himself, and that too at the Garrison. He could always take Daniel along with him, also, the presence of a baby might even melt the old woman's heart and she might even get distracted enough to agree in doing business with him.
"Mary?" Tommy's voice rang through the halls and the housekeeper dropped the dusting she was doing at the voice of her employer and rushed out.
"Yes, Mr. Shelby?"
"Can you get Daniel ready and make sure he's dressed warm enough? I'm taking the baby out."
"Sure, Mr. Shelby." Mary kept standing there, watching Thomas leave the living room, his heavy footsteps moving away, towards his study. She frowned slightly as she made her way to the baby's nursery. Once Daniel was dressed up in something warm, she filled up his baby bag with a bottle of milk, some cloth nappies and a rattle that the baby loved playing with.
Just then, there was a knock on the door and Tommy was leaning by the doorframe, watching Mary as she zipped up the baby bag.
"Mr. Shelby, I'm sorry to ask but do you want me to come with you, to help with the baby since the Missus is not home?"
The idea appealed to Tommy. It would have been a lie to say he didn't require help with the baby. Had Daniel's nanny been here, he would have gladly accepted but he couldn't take Mary with him. For two reasons. One, he needed someone to take care of the house. Two, and the more important reason, he didn't need unwanted ears prying over his business deal. Besides, Daniel was a good baby, all he needed was to be fed once and then he fell asleep. Or, he would just play on with the rattle if he was awake.
"No thank you, Mary. You may go and resume your work."
• ───━━━━─ ● ─━━━━─── •
If anyone was to see this hilarious sight, any gangster or any of Thomas Shelby's enemy, he would have rolled over the floor, laughing. It wasn't a daily sight that the leader of the Peaky Blinders walked into the Garrison with a stroller, the mindless babbles of a child echoing all through the quiet pub, all eyes on him. If he did feel embarassed, or flustered, he didn't show it.
The minute he entered, he pushed the stroller straight into the private room, the door banging shut. The business deal took over an hour and once done, the door opened once again and a woman with almost greying hair, her eyes like a Mohawk, stepped out, scanning the crowd with her eyes.
With the way Tommy's eyes were relaxed, his hand moving mechanically from his lips back down, a lit cigarette in his hand, it was pretty clear that the business deal had gone in his favour. He walked out with the woman to where her horse was, watching her as she left, galloping down the street like the wind, until she was nowhere in sight.
Maybe it was the stress that work actually caused him, because what followed after was something Tommy would regret for a long time.
Tommy Shelby forgot about his son and instead of going back to the private room to get the sleeping child, he mumbled something incoherent under his breath and walked out of the Garrison, smoking his cigarette. He slid into the motorcar, taking off his cap for a split second to run his hands through his matted hair, before fixing the cap back on. Turning the engine on, he slowly pulled the car onto the road and started driving back towards the Arrowe House, his baby completely forgotten.
It had been three hours since you had reached London. You had already met your father, having had a good one hour discussion with him. You were now sitting at your old home, the place where you had grown up, staring blankly at the ceiling. Your heart was getting restless, you had no idea what was going on back home and whether Tommy and Daniel were doing okay.
Finally, you stood up and huffing in frustration, you grabbed your bag, swinging it over your shoulder and rushed out of the room, running into your mother.
"Where on earth are you off to, lassie?"
"I'm going back home."
You bit your lip, your fingers toying nervously with each other. You were waiting for your mother to begin lecturing you on how you had visiting after years and now you were just going to leave but the words that exited her mouth left you in awe.
"T's okay love, I'm your mother too. I know what it feels like being miles away from your flesh and blood."
Thus, by the time Thomas Shelby was done with the business meeting at the Garrison and was driving back home, you had already stepped off the train at the Birmingham station. You pitched a ride with one of your friend's husbands who you knew worked at the station. It was a fifteen minute ride and he dropped you off at the gate.
Excited, you walked at a fast pace, towards the front door when you saw Mary dusting over a ceramic statue by the entrance. She saw you and almost gasped, not having expected for you to show up after the dark the same day you had left.
"Mrs. Shelby? Is everything alright? I thought you weren't going to back until tomorrow noon."
"I know, I know Mary, I just couldn't rest easy without Daniel. You know it's the first time I went somewhere without him–" Still talking to her, you stepped quietly into your home, the woman following you as she helped you take off your heavy coat.
"I suppose Polly must be inside eh? The house is so quiet." You looked at Mary, squinting your eyes with slight confusion.
"Mrs. Shelby, Ms. Gray had to leave early today. She had some work." Mary lowered her eyes for a split second and your eyes almost widened.
"Oh, I see. Thomas must be upstairs then? With Daniel?"
"About that, Mrs–"
You saw the woman look up at you with nervous eyes, her fingers toying with her white apron and you instantly knew something was wrong.
"Mary? Where is my husband? Is he with another woman? Oh my god, there's another woman up there, isn't it–"
You were already on your heels, storming through the hallway towards the bedrooms, the pleas of Mary falling on deaf ears.
"Mrs. Shelby, No. There's no woman. Mr. Shelby isn't home. He had a business deal to make so he took the baby along."
You stopped walking, your eyes narrowed as you turned towards her. You were furious, more so because you had thought you would find Tommy in bed with some other woman, but this revelation did not do anything to pacify you.
You clenched your eyes shut to calm yourself– it was alright, wasn't it? Of course Tommy would not have taken the baby with him if he was going somewhere that wasn't safe. You trusted your husband that much.
You had almost relaxed now and were climbing up the stairs on your way to your room when you heard the motorcar come to a halt. Tommy stepped out, shutting the door, his steps slow and dragged towards the front entrance. He placed the hand on the doorknob, twisting it until he heard a click and the door swung open.
He took of his coat, hanging it on the coat hanger by the entrance and was about to head straight to his study where he could sit and get some files sorted. You quietly made your way back downstairs only to come face to face with your husband on his way to the study. His eyes widened with surprise as he had not expected to see you.
"Love? You are back early."
You smiled softly, placing your hand on the railing as you gracefully stepped off the last stair and rushed into your husband's embrace.
"It's all fine, Papa isn't angry anymore. You tell me, where's Daniel?" You had by now wrapped your hands around his neck, but your eyes were scanning for the stroller.
It suddenly hit him.
Fuck.
Tommy's hand flew to his head, abruptly pushing you away in the act, his cap falling off, his hand grabbing a hold of his matted hair, almost tugging down on them. You kept looking at him, a horror sweeping over your face when you suddenly realized that Daniel was not with him.
"Where is my baby?!! Where's Daniel Tommy?!!"
It felt as though you didn't know who this man was – standing in front of you, his head almost hung low, his eyes clenched shut. Before you could ask him again, he had already turned on his tail and was speed walking towards the car.
"Thomas Shelby, wait! Will you fucking tell me what's going on?!" You ran along with him, trying to do anything you could to get him to answer you, grabbing his arm or blocking his way until he finally yelled at you.
"I FUCKING LEFT DANIEL AT THE GARRISON ALRIGHT? FOR FUCKS SAKE, WILL YOU MOVE OUT OF MY BLOODY WAY?"
Of course, he had left his baby at the Garrison. What kind of a father was he? You kept standing there, too numb to even react, almost leaning over the hedgerow, your eyes moist and cloudy with worry. What if something happened to Daniel? What would you do? How will you face Thomas Shelby without hating him for it? For fucks sake, you shouldn't have left. You shouldn't have gone to London. You cursed yourself.
Twenty minutes.
You kept walking around the lawn, waiting for a glimpse of your baby, to hear him babble mindlessly in your ears again when you saw the headlights of the car almost flash on your face before coming to a halt with a screech. Your husband stepped out, holding Daniel in his arm, talking to him.
"Will you forgive your daddy, love? Will you forgive me for being the bad, reckless father I have been?"
You walked up to him, your anger still pretty evident on your face and giving you one look, Tommy handed you the baby, not wanting to get into an argument he knew he couldn't win this time. You took Daniel and planted a kiss over his cheek, your tears finally spilling out.
"Mummy's sorry she left you, love. I never should have left. I should have known–" Your angry eyes shot towards your husband and he parted his lips, letting out a weak exhale.
"Love, I'm sorry, I–"
"You can sleep in any other room tonight, but you are not welcome in the bedroom. Not until you realize how you put our son in danger." You turned on your tail and cooing slightly to your son who was now playing with loose strands of your hair, tugging at them and giggling playfully, you walked into your bedroom and closed the door behind you, laying Daniel in Tommy's side of the bed.
Tommy wasn't a bad father, he had never let you feel that away ever but you didn't want him to do anything like this ever again and you knew you had to make sure he didn't. You were eventually going to forgive him, but that day wasn't today.
(I don't have a permanent tag list at the moment but I'm thinking of having one. If you want to be added, please send me message or an ask please.)
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I am curious: what are your favorite scenes from your main ships (date, dair, derena...)?
scenes involving milo don't count, sorry!
for me, it's really not just scenes, but body language & just in general, how they are with each other, you know? dan and serena grin at each other and hug SO much, you can tell that being around each other in s1 made them both so happy, and even after that glow fades the way they look for comfort in each other... top level stuff. the way blair looks at dan... we never see her as radiant at any other point. she was not looking at anyone else like this. and gosh, dan and nate. they're both so comfortable around each other that there's absolutely nothing weird about like. discussing that one ex girlfriend whom they both share AND both were in love with. there is literally no other duo who trusts/enjoys each other's company so much that they're comfortable in a love triangle. (probably because they're more in love with each other than with the girl, but that is not the point. or is it?)
anyway, more specific answers. under the cut. this is one of the longest answers i've ever written on this blog possibly but you KNEW that would happen when you sent this ask, didn't you? (affectionate)
derena: i tagged one of my ds reblogs as 'the grumpy one is soft for the sunshine one' and like. look at them! this hug from 1x10 kills me in the best way. they are both the literal embodiment of :D when they see each other! i love 1x10 as a whole moment, their entire thing at cotillion is so sweet and they're both so happy. the fact that he is talking about his chemistry teacher during this kiss in 1x07. that bit at the end of 1x05 when they talk about their siblings (being there for their sibling because of fallible parents being a derena parallel makes me simultaneously really sad and really soft, tbh). 1x05 gives me SO MUCH SECONDHAND EMBARRASSMENT but the way they walk off together arms around each other does something to me - these are two people who are still getting to know each other but who really like what they see, and who trust each other and. are just having a good time together! back when derena was my OTP, the 1x11 "your story's about me?" was absolutely a fave, too, and i still adore it, albeit in a different, more nostalgic way. i like a dan who writes cute stories about serena. no empty shell sabrina van skoneker bullshit. she is so much like you, daniel! you'd be shattered if she did this to you. don't do this to her. tbh, most derena moments from s1 are just A+ romance. the bit in 2x02 in the jitney is so funny, they're SO bad at being exes. the bit in... 3x03 i think?? i don't remember... on the contrary. when they're talking about dan's fling w/ georgina and serena's relationship with carter, the ease with which they talk and how happy/supportive they are of each other's new relationships... yeah. love to see it.
i also really like any instance of them having honest/open conversations. 1x13, talking about how serena is concerned about blair. 1x08, serena talking to dan about feeling jealous of vanessa. this bit from the touch of eva or whatever that episode is. 4x04 i think. this is the conversation everyone is trying to get dan to have and he's avoiding EVERYONE else. derena interactions in 3x21 (can't find a gif right now) - the fact that dan is with serena when her dad abandons them, the fact that he goes all the way there with her. 2x07, "i'm really glad you're nate's friend. he really needs someone like you right now" (though i'm cheating, that's technically a d/n moment too klhdflkgf). there's a bit in s4 where he's advising her against having an affair w/ colin, i don't remember the ep number, but the way he takes her side so easily and naturally and puts due blame/responsibility solely on her professor... yeah. 4x10 i think this ep is?? idk. but like my tags say, im sentimental about this moment because while what dan was doing was irresponsible, sneaking her out of the ostroff, he was the only person in this episode who was actually talking to her and listening to her and taking her seriously. nobody else was doing that!!
i probably have more moments i'm not remembering, but we're only 1/3 into this answer and LOOK AT THE WORDS, good lord, i'm sorry.
dair: my favourite dair episode is hands down despicable b (5x21) which i have heard is an uncommon answer. i just love the conflict resolution of it all, okay!!! 1x04 & 2x08 are like. standard answers any dair shipper will give, and i'm no different. i love dan being able to give blair advice and blair actually taking his advice even though they're not friends yet!!! be right back, yelling at the intimacy of it all!! 5x16, with their getting together (this little kiss and dan being so startled by it), blair admitting a flaw she genuinely does have and dan saying it's not awful because it's her, which is just. romance at its finest. those vows, good lord. 5x18.... they're having fun! blair showing up at the loft in lingerie for dan... the delight on her face.... (i know this moment blows up in their face but when she's there she looks so happy and proud of herself and this was like THE moment when i was like. oh. dair is really the heart of this garbage show huh).
i think for me, the thing that really sells dan & blair together is the serena of it all. both of them love serena more fiercely than anyone else, and that is what brings them together. (fwiw i definitely think nate loved serena this much and this deeply, too; the writers just wanted to pop the serenate balloon, which even i think was extremely unnecessary and ooc.) but (& i have so much meta about this) their relationship grows beyond serena. their entire s4 arc is SO good. i love how comfortable around each other they are, in such an adult way, in the sense of like. they both bring so much stability to each other? morgan tagged this edit "the marrieds" and like. yeah. b offers to help him shave. they're having breakfast & reading the paper together.
all the love declarations we got that weren't a simple 'i love you.' be your charming wonderful self (how could she not love you/ tell me what would make you happy, dan) i told chuck he doesn't have my heart anymore (you spent your life earning the keys to set you free when you were free all along!!!!) dan's pep talk to blair in 5x21 (already linked a gifset earlier, here's another one if you want i guess). there's definitely more... but honestly, the way the dair arc was executed was so good - while i do have my complaints, i also think keeping those aside, it was SO close to perfect. i love dan & blair's banter and gradually becoming closer and closer and closer. it felt very organic and real and GOSH. the way penn & leighton looked at each other while playing dan and blair...... it's just SO MUCH.
date: this is the hardest, because it's. *screams*. maybe you saw me losing my mind over those 2 seconds of nate handing dan a waffle? i love almost every scene with these two, even the hellish s6 breakup scene. my favourite episode for d/n (& also favourite gg episode in general) is 2x06 - i love the homoerotic subtext of it all. nate pretending to be dan because dan's name is the first name that came to his head. dan flirting w/ nate while tied to that thing, in his underwear. them becoming friends. and 2x07 as a follow-up to that! dan getting nate to live in the loft with the humphreys for a while. i am so soft.
4x09 is a terrible episode in general, especially for serena my beloved, but the d/n moments in that one? off the CHARTS. this weird overly macho flirting, in some ways THE most iconic d/n line. this entire finish each other's sentences nonsense. someone (i think it was ana but im not sure?) compared the energy of those scenes i just linked to the book blairenate love triangle resolution, blairena choosing each other over nate in the books, date choosing each other over serena in the show (if only! RIP.) after the saints & sinners ball, this cute little moment of 'youre the only one who understands me. please tell me they went home together. i mean. how could they not have.
3x07, them watching vampire porn together. a tag i used on ao3 (& also on here, once) is 'nate brings out the himbo in dan'. here is a prime example. 'is she levitating?' i don't fucking know, dan, what do you think?? (i was telling my partner that that's what i love abt dair vs date. around blair dan is an intellectual, a librarian, an art historian, a museum curator. around nate it's like dan is competing to be #1 himbo on the show. can my girlfriend actually fly? i don't know, dan. i can't believe you're seriously asking such a question.)
3x12 pep talk. (sorry about the shitty quality!) essentially nate telling dan that he (dan) is hot and that he shouldn't talk himself down so much.
dan making nate gay in his book. you know. his book from which blair found out he was in love with her. nads (who i will not tag in this billion word long gushy meta, because i value her sanity) once called inside "wish fulfilment' and. i mean. yeah
nate checking dan out at the derena wedding continues to be hilarious. hilarious in the same way as dan sexually fantasising about nate. canon really went 'let's give ivy some special easter eggs' and i appreciate them a lot!
i love the way they are around each other - so quietly attuned to each other. i showed my sister my date!husbands gifset, and she was like. yeah they're so married. and it's just stuff like how dan looks for nate over his shoulder, it's not even an active action, it's as easy and natural and intuitive as breathing, checking to see if nate is still there.
oh, that wasn't as hard as it could've been! okay. cool. im SURE there's more things i could scream about, because it's DN, the fact that they're non-canon makes me THAT much fiercer about them than dair/derena, to be honest. so many dots to connect!! anyway.
#meta#derena#dair#date#anon#this is SUCH a gushy essay but like. what did you expect#how else could i have answered this#this took. an embarrassingly long amount of time#but i had SO much fun so#citations for my ships#don't mind me *whistles under my breath*
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track 001. quien es el?
─── ❝ y ¿quién es él? ❞ ───
masterlist // next
esteban ocon can i be the first to say that i had no idea any of this was happening? fernando and i knew he was leaving, we just didn’t know where. i was not expecting otmar to react the way he did.
daniel ricciardo i think this may be the most dramatic exit and entrance in the current years of f1
mae jones the only thing to top this would be if ferrari’s golden boy announced he was leaving to redbull
charles leclerc stop spreading the rumor that i’m leaving ferrari!
mae jones never, it's hilarious watching the tifosi lose their shit on twitter whenever the rumor starts back up again
mick schumacher not to mention seb’s retirement
lance stroll STOP! IF WE DON'T TALK ABOUT IT THEN THAT DOESNT MAKE IT REAL!
charles leclerc DON’T TALK ABOUT IT! SEB ISN'T RETIRING! LET US LIVE IN DELUSION!
isabella perez can’t believe paddock dad is leaving us to fend for ourselves. don’t bring it up again mick
freya vettel at least you still have nando and lewis?
george russell realistically, we’re all gonna die then.
lance stroll we get it, he’s your dad, you’re going to see him more than us now
lewis hamilton okay, forget you guys and seeing roscoe
penelope trevino don’t you dare take away our roscoe privileges
sebastian vettel nice to know you all love me
charles leclerc is it enough to keep you from retiring?
sebastian vettel no
lando norris i’m supposed to be the responsible one now?
daphne jones added two new people
daphne jones i'm begging you heathens please be nice to the new rookies and do not question how i got their numbers
max verstappen it’s because you are daphne jones
bailey winters anyone remember when she did this same thing with me? just randomly put me in a groupchat with a bunch of strangers?
+1 954-397-5464 i would say i'm creeped out by someone managing to get my number so quickly but i'm more so impressed. who the hell is in this and why is fernado alonso the group picture?
+61 491 570 157 this is why you would be the first to die in a horror movie. hello esteban.
esteban ocon hello oscar, i'm assuming the other person is logan?
lando norris logan is such an american name. we get it you’re from america. rah, freedom, guns, and all that shit 🇺🇸🦅
logan sargeant i’m not the only american here? why am i being singled out?
max verstappen you seem like you fit the stereotype for americans
logan sargeant did i just get called basic by max verstappen?
mae jones as long as there are no forks nearby, you shouldn't worry
max verstappen oh fuck off
bailey winters oscar, does he have a tinder profile? and is there a picture of him holding a fish on there?
oscar piastri i don’t know about the tinder thing but he does have a picture of him holding a giant fish
carlos sainz what’s the saying? i rest my case?
logan sargeant i hate this already
lewis hamilton join the club mate
oscar piastri i feel like it's my job to let everyone know logan just let out the most ungodly screech i've ever heard from him. my ears will never recover. arthur is currently clutching his ears in pain
freya vettel speaking of balls, isa had some to tweet what she did about mclaren
isabella perez 🤷🏻♀️ someone had to say it and it was gonna me
isabella perez i will not tolerate any mistreatment of daniel ricciardo
pierre gasly no one was speaking of balls?
rowan todd figure of speach french fuck
daniel ricciardo talk about having a dramatic f1 entrance
lance stroll how high is this on the list from brocedes to abu dhabi 2021?
natalia ruiz i’d say right in between?
lewis hamilton can we not talk about that? thanks.
esteban ocon someone’s still heartbroken about his loss
lewis hamilton you would be too if your best friend pulled the same shit on you. matter of fact, mick get in my car, pull the same shit on him
mick schumacher please don’t involve me in this. i don’t want any part of this.
alex albon OH MY GOD! OSCAR IS DRS GUY
george russell THAT'S HIM?
oscar piastri i thought those days were behind me
isabella perez some advice for the rookies, this group never lets anything go, ever. they still bring up the smoothie inchident and that happened in 2019.
charles leclerc they still bring up the inchident and its been years
max verstappen no, it's just unfair
george russell i'm leading, he want to pass
alex albon he push me, i push him back
esteban ocon and after he push me off the track
pierre gasly it's not fair right?
lando norris thank you! thank you max!
isabella perez charles! what’s happened with max?
natalia ruiz nothing just an inchident on the race
charles leclerc i hate all of you
carlos sainz i'm going to be cupid again!
isabella perez what the hell does that mean?
daniel ricciardo i believe i told you your time would come again?
george russell what does that mean?
max verstappen sorry, you people weren't around when the original groupchat was made. you'll never know.
sebastian vettel do i get to know?
daniel ricciardo of course you do.
duckling NO ONE SAID PIASTRI WAS CUTE???? HE’S THE ENEMY!
super max we didn’t notice?
honey badger didn’t you just get out of a relationship?
duckling I’M ALLOWED TO THINK PEOPLE ARE CUTE!
super max why is oscar the enemy?
duckling he’s signed with mclaren? our biggest enemy for the way they treated danny?
honey badger oh my god isabella, please let it go. it’s for the best.
duckling unless you’re coming to every single race next year, this is not fine! what am i supposed to do without my emotional support person?
super max stick with oscar apparently.
duckling i’m going to leave you at the next gas station i see.
super max wow.
honey badger haven't you seen him around the paddock? he's been around the entire season
duckling i had a boyfriend daniel.
honey badger you could've been friends?? or was that not allowed.
duckling wow. is this what max felt earlier?
super max hurts doesn't it?
ducking oh yeah.
honey badger wait…WAS HE ONE OF THE CUTE PREMA BOYS YOU HAD A CRUSH ON?
duckling
super max oh my god…HE IS!
duckling
honey badger so oscar was one of them but who were the others? oliver? or was it just oscar?
duckling just oscar but oliver is pretty cute
daniel ricciardo carlos, it’s your time to shine. matchmaker sainz is back
¡leclerc-s speaks!
in honor of oscar winning today’s sprint, i give you the first chapter of my oscar series. these are all being posted at random and have no specific order of posting. if you're confused about the order of events, refer to the timeline posted.
¡disclaimer!
this is in no way making assumptions about the people involved in this story, this is all fake. it is a fanfiction please don't take any of what is said seriously. this is all for entertainment purposes and as a creative outlet for me. enjoy!
#leclerc-s#the honest series#oscar piastri#formula 1#oscar piastri x female oc#formula 1 fic#fanfic#fanfiction#f1#f1 smau#f1 social media au#f1 instagram au#f1 fic
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AIGHT Y’ALL I wasn’t tagged but I’m doing this anyways because f u c k i t
It's the year 2021 and you're obsessed with The Karate Kid. How are you feeling?
Deadasss weird as fuck, my dude. Like...out of all the things I could’ve predicted happening in our lord’s year 2021, it definitely was NOT getting hyperfixated on a hammy gay ship with a punk and a nerd from a goddamn karate soap opera. And yet...here we are??? I will never understand hyperfixations, my guy. But I’ve met a lot of really cool people in this fandom, so I can’t really complain.
Did you grow up with TKK or are you new to the series?
I have never seen a single Karate Kid movie in my entire life. When I was a kid, it looked kinda dumb so I never got into it XD But then I saw my roommate watching Cobra Kai on Youtube Red one day (he has every streaming service known to man) and I was hooked. And...here I am!
We gotta do the basics. Favorite character:
Literally EVERYONE except for Kreese, Yasmine, Kyler, and Tory, sorry stans
Okay but if we gotta pick, Johnny Lawrence is my Problematic Fave. Also I love my boy Daniel, he’s trying his best!!! And Amanda LaRusso, we stan a queen!!!
Among the kids, definitely Miguel, with Demetri as a close second. I also love Sam, Aisha, Moon, and Hawk (pre- and post-Bastardization Arc, anyways XD)!
Favorite ship:
Take a look at my username and take a WILD FUCKING GUESS lmao
Yes it’s Eli/Demetri because DUH, every interaction they have is so fucking gay and Eli fucking saved him!!! And came back to him!!! And betrayed the world’s most terrifying dojo with a WAR CRIMINAL SENSEI all for Demetri!!! And how Demetri was willing to forgive him for everything at the drop of a hat because he always had faith there was still good in his best friend??? That’s TRUE LOVE motherfuckers. Please let them kiss in Season 4. I will sell you all of my limbs.
Sam/Miguel is a close second because they’re cute as shit and it’s just so lovely to see two people so unapologetically smitten with each other. They are in LOVE, and I will RIOT if they break up again!!! Keep Sam and Miguel together 2k21!!!
Underrated character:
SAMANTHA LARUSSO!!! The amount of hate my girl gets for acting like a normal teenager and fucking up occasionally JUST like the rest of the cast makes me want to start punching things. She cares SO MUCH about her friends!!! And she loves the shit out of Miguel!!! She hasn’t always been the best friend but you know what??? Neither has Hawk, and we still forgave his ass!!! Also LET HER BE FEMININE but also kick utter ass, my god!!! Femininity should not be synonymous with being weak, y’all!
ALSO DEMETRI, like yes, he likes to complain and occasionally run his mouth, but guess what else he likes to do??? Never give up on the love of his life his best friend Eli Moskowitz and refuse to lose faith in him no matter how much of a little shit he’s become, and I for one think that’s very badass of him. Also the way he takes care of Eli pre-Cobra Kai in his own snarky bastard way makes me absolutely Weak and needs more appreciation. Like the dude has charisma and COULD have probably made other friends and left Eli behind if he wanted, but did he??? No, he wants the weepy loser with the lip scar in the polo shirts and dorky sweaters and will protect him as much as his wimpy ass is able!!!
Underrated ship (don’t say therapy, lol):
Among the adults, Daniel/Amanda!!! Like maybe I just don’t watch that much tv, but it seems kinda rare to me to see a happily married hetero couple, and it’s just nice to see a married couple who genuinely love each other and where there’s not like...lingering resentment or some shit. I feel like this ship gets overshadowed by Lawrusso a lot (which like--okay, fair!!! Daniel and Johnny do have a ridiculous amount of chemistry, and the gay undertones are undeniable, so I get it), and it makes me kinda sad. I do love Lawrusso, but I don’t like when Amanda has to get her heart broke for it to happen, you feel?
Among the kids, honestly YasMoon. Like I really love the idea of Yasmine trying to better herself because of Moon’s influence on her and because Moon like...inspires her to be a better person, I guess? With their pretty strong friendship, it just makes more sense to me for Yasmine to get a redemption arc through Moon than through Demetri. ALSO girls DO often pull the whole “mean girl” shtick to cover up being closeted lesbians, and Moon IS canonically bi, so it could work!!! I just think this one could be a really interesting Friends to Lovers take, and could make a really nice coming-out arc for Yas.
And MoonPiper too, honestly!!! Like they only got 5 seconds of screentime so I understand WHY it’s underrated, but I still love what we DID get and loved that there was a canon gay ship (even if only for 1 scene lmao). I’m really excited to potentially see more of them in Season 4!!! Please, I’m begging!!!
Wax On, Wax Off or Sweep the Leg?
Sweep the Leg because it will always be deeply hilarious to me how Demetri took note of the first move Eli ever used on him and spent presumably weeks perfecting it OUT OF SPITE just to get him back with it at the soccer game MONTHS later. Just goes to show how OBSESSED Demetri is with Eli and their little karate rivalry which is just NOT straight, I’m sorry
Which of Daniel’s dumb little outfits is your favorite?
There’s something so funny about this pretentious little fuck walking around in fancy suits once he becomes a #SuccessfulBusinessman, and still occasionally trying to do karate in a full-ass suit (take THAT, Tom Cole’s boba!!!) I’m also a big fan of how he looks in his gi with his little headband. Still killing that look as a 40-50-something!!!
Character from the films you most want to return, who’s not Terry Silver:
Tbh I have still never seen a single Karate Kid movie (they took them off of Netflix, RIP), so...I don’t really care if they bring anyone else back??? I’m invested in the characters we already have in the show, I don’t need some rando from the movies to make a cameo to have a good time XD The only character I really wanted them to bring back was Ali, and they already did, so like...I’m good??? That’s all I really needed, I can die in peace now XD
Scene that lives in your head rent-free:
Basically any fluffy Elimetri scene, but 5 in particular:
~Miguel first meeting Eli and Demetri at the lunch table, and Eli looking at Demetri like he hung every goddamn star in the sky
~Demetri going off at a terrifying, “unhinged” karate sensei on the first day of Cobra Kai because he made fun of Eli’s lip and Demetri is not about that shit
~ELI STEALING DEMETRI’S NACHO AND SMIRKING AT HIM, LIKE EXCUSE ME SIR PLEASE BE A LITTLE LESS HOMOSEXUAL IN FRONT OF YOUR GIRLFRIEND
~Eli yanking Demetri onstage during Valley Fest to hold a board, and Demetri being visibly like...extremely turned on when Eli breaks said board
~ELI SAVING DEMETRI DURING THE CHRISTMAS FIGHT, ELI APOLOGIZING, DEMETRI AND ELI KICKING COBRA ASS TOGETHER AKSBDCUWYVCBU
Will Anthony LaRusso ever be relevant?
I hope not! He’s kind of a funny meme character to pop up now and again but I don’t think he deserves a serious plotline when there are so many more interesting characters to follow.
You live in The Valley and are forced into the karate gang war. Which dojo do you join?
Miyagi-Do because Cobra Kai would eat me alive. Also I’d probably straight up get stuck and die in that cement mixer, if I even made it that far XD Besides, being salty that your friend who you have a crush on likes martial arts better than you and starting martial arts to impress them but also being too lazy to join anything TOO intense is a Big Mood and I am certainly not speaking from personal experience here, no sirree
What’s your training montage song?
"Shut Up and Drive” by Rihanna for a weight-training and bicep-flexing montage, “Whatever It Takes” by Imagine Dragons for a more intense punching-and-kicking-shit montage. I don’t know why this is, I just feel it in my heart.
It’s the crossover event of the century! Which TV show are you combining with Cobra Kai for an hour-long Saturday night special?
*Briefly panics because I don’t actually watch that much TV and most of the stuff I do watch is fantasy/sci fi shit that absolutely would not work for a CK crossover*
Hmmmm okay but ACTUALLY
You know what would be fucking funny as hell would be an It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia crossover. Allow me to elaborate:
~The Gang goes to LA on vacation during the height of the Karate Dojo Wars. They literally can get barely anything done without all these goddamn karate-fighting teenagers getting in the way.
~They are all very annoyed by this. Even the most obscure of tourist attractions is eventually intercepted by karate fights.
~Mac tries to join Cobra Kai because he sees all this karate fighting on, and wants to unquestionably prove both his badassery and masculinity. Both Johnny and Kreese are like “Wtf are you doing here? Aren’t you like 30?”
~Mac gets a planet-sized crush on Johnny after all of 5 minutes and endlessly gushes to the gang about him. The gang mercilessly roast him about this and about how much of a pathetic loser with his life together in no way whatsoever Johnny sounds like. They proceed to have exactly 0 self awareness about this.
~The Waitress is in town visiting family or something, and Charlie is stalking her, as per usual. However, every time he’s about to go up and talk to her, a pack of battling Miyagi-Dos and Cobra Kais throwing punches and kicks everywhere blocks his path. One times, Mac is among one of these packs and Charlie is like “???? He didn’t get kicked out of that teen karate dojo yet???”
~Seeing how much the Kids These Days seem to like fighting, Charlie drops by a local high school to try and sell Fight Milk to the kids doing karate. Only Kyler and Brucks buy into it, and subsequently get the entire West Valley High wrestling team sick. Charlie is inevitably arrested, as Counselor Blatt thinks he’s selling the kids drugs.
~Dennis makes a plan to have sex with every hot chick he can in Los Angeles. He meets Ali on a dating app post-divorce, and inevitably tries to bang her. It doesn’t work.
~Frank crashes the rental car, and inevitably the gang ends up at one of Daniel’s dealerships. Dee quickly takes a liking to Daniel and is like “Watch, assholes--Imma homewreck this guy’s marriage.” She starts frequenting the dealerships to attempt to flirt with Daniel, until one day she walks in on him having sex with Johnny in a back room and she’s like “Is that the guy from Mac’s goddamn dojo?!?!”
~Dennis, of course, tries to sleep with Amanda. Amanda is not having it, and rebukes him in the most snarky, Amanda-esque way possible. Dennis is just like “Oh not AGAIN--the women in this goddamn diva city have too high of standards!”
~Later on, the gang is at the beach and Dennis spots the blonde lady he went out on an ill-fate date with, and decides to give it another shot--that is, until he sees her go up and kiss another woman and he’s like “IS THAT THE LADY FROM THE CAR DEALERSHIP??? STUPID-KARATE-KICK-COMMERCIAL’S WIFE?!? YOU HAVE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME.”
~Dee complains to Dennis about her lack of luck getting laid, and Dennis is just like “Oh come ON, is everyone in Los Angeles gay???” Smash cut to Hawk and Demetri having sex, Moon and Piper making out, Bert and Nate holding hands, Chris and Mitch doing oral, and Amanda, Ali, and Carmen having a threesome.
~Frank tries to scam Kreese into buying cheaply-made karate equipment for his dojo. The gang ends up having to leave LA because Kreese is quite literally plotting all of their murders.
For tagging, uuuuhhhhhh @jackonthelongwalk @soe-leo @max-eagle-fang @cc-tinslebee @backawayfromthegay @asphodel-storm do the thing, if y’all haven’t yet!
#cobra kai#cobra kai season 1#cobra kai season 2#cobra kai season 3#ck#tag game#binary boyfriends#daniel larusso#johnny lawrence#it's always sunny in philadelphia#iasip
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Squids, Dancing, and Dirty thoughts... Not necessarily in that order or all at once.
Apparently people like this? I am more confused than Liam is in this chapter. Which you know, makes sense bc this character only exists in my head, but also doesn’t at all bc I have no idea what goes on in there most of the time. Anyway this is for Zayn, Oxford commas, @stanmedusa who pointed out Zayn was also an Oxford comma stan, @redyellowberry, and their anon to started this mess. Also please imagine Zayn with his current blue hair, but also with his long Aladdin hair bc that’s what I’ve been doing and oh holy gods do I need that to happen. Please. Hair gods make it happen I’m begging
Same warnings as ever its 4AM, this is much longer than planned, and I have no interest in editing, making it sound coherent, or good. No, I don’t know about the squids either.
Parts 1&2 here
Liam would like to point out while he's not a stranger to feeling confused, he's still having trouble pinpointing how exactly he got to be Dance Mistress Irina Alinova's personal bitch.
Ever since he accidentally interrupted one of the dance practises while looking for a missing prop for Director Corden, more and more of them started disappearing only to show up in the basement. No one else was interested in facing the Dance Mistresses' wrath, but Liam didn't mind the yelling. As long as Mistress Alinova didn't start throwing things, he figured he was safe enough. After all, it gave him the chance to see the blue haired ballerino again.
Zayn Malik, the god in mortal form, the prima ballerino, the prettiest man Liam had ever seen, who had no idea who Liam even was.
Liam had it bad.
Liam had it so bad.
Liam had it so bad he tripped over thin air, spilled hot coffee over himself, and walked into a door when he thought he saw him at a Costas with Louis. The man he saw wasn't Zayn, thank fuck, but the entire sequence of events did give Louis more ammunition to tease him with. Stupid pretty boys with long blue hair and piercings sent from hell just to ruin Liam's life. Yeah, he was a goner.
Louis dragged out the whole sorry story after Liam texted him about spiking his lunch and laughed himself sick knowing just how much of a mess Liam became around people he was interested in. They still didn't talk about Danielle. Which was a good thing considering the end of that relationship had Liam pretty much swearing off women for the rest of his life. No pussy was worth that mess. Dick though? Liam was willing to take that chance on Zayn, even if asking Harry didn't give him much information.
According to Harry, Zayn had been around for a few years but mostly kept to himself or the other dancers. There was something about him throwing a fit a few weeks before Liam showed up. Upset about being forced to learn the choreography for Winston's show when it was just going to fail on opening night like it always did.
Liam thought he had a point, considering. He didn't know what bananas, ballet, and really bad rapping had to do with King James VI but didn't want to voice that in front of the man playing the gay king. No one dared fire Zayn, considering he kept the whole theatre afloat, but it also didn't make many actors happy with him. Especially not Mizz Wendy Williams, who played Marie Antoinette in the play. Again, Liam had a lot of questions he didn't dare ask out loud. It's not like he was ever good at history, so it was entirely possible the two lived in the same time period. Or it was some sort of allegory that went over his head like the aristocrats wearing banana suits did.
Louis always found his stories about his placement hilarious, but even that one had him wondering if there wasn't some sort of gas leak in their apartment. It wouldn't have been the first time, or the second. Most likely, it was the theatre that was growing some sort of mold that caused insanity if breathed in. Some of the things Liam had been forced to clean in the past few weeks were unspeakable.
But even that probably couldn't explain Zayn Malik. Nothing could explain that sort of beauty and talent. Or those hands... and thighs... and fingers. Ung. Liam would love to get up close and personal with all of him.
Either way, Liam had just been cleaning the mirrors in the practice room, humming along to Brandy and Monica on the radio, wondering if Niall was actually going to come down and help him instead of hiding away like a coward. Again. By the second verse, he'd given up trying not to sing along, not expecting anyone to come by. It was late, the dancer's practise long over, and Winston left screaming over an hour ago. Liam would have done a recce and skipped out on the last half hour if one of the managers wasn't sticking around still. Piers Morgan, an absolute cunt who treated the lads on probation like hardened criminals, and he was the prison warden. Despite, you know, most of the lads on summary probation, and Liam’s arson charge being the most serious crime out of all of them.
Anyway, the last thing he's expecting is for anyone to come in while he's singing about the boy being his, rolling his body to the beat. Which is probably how he ends up tripping over himself when he notices Zayn leaning up against the open door, watching him. Watching him, in bright, tight, teal dance tights (were dance tights usually blue? They should be) that looked nice with his hair and complimented the gold tones of his skin. The skin he could see a lot of. Because he was shirtless. Because he was shirtless and had a lot more tattoos than Liam realized. Tattoos Liam wanted to bite. Not hard enough to make a mark or anything, that would be sacrilegious, but enough to make him make a sound. God, Liam hoped he was a moaner. Not that he thought he had a chance with Zayn or anything, but it would be a shame if Zayn was the type that stayed quiet during sex.
Except he wasn't being quiet now, he was talking. And Liam was staring at him, like an idiot, not paying attention. Because he was an idiot.
Oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck, why did this always happen to him?
"Er, what?" Liam asked, desperately hoping he didn't sound as stupid as he felt right then, which was pretty fucking stupid. He probably looked even stupider than he felt and ruined his chances at ever-
"I asked if you were almost done? Was planning on practising more tonight," Zayn answered him.
Zayn, Zayn Fucking Malik, answered him, and he was still staring at him like an idiot. Shit Liam say something.
"Pretty"
Not that you idiot.
"What?" Zayn asked, looking confused and adorable.
Oh god, he was precious. Was that a smile? Was he smiling at him? Liam? Oh no.
"Pretty much, I meant. Pretty much done," Liam replied, wishing the ground would swallow him whole. "Just one more mirror, and I'll be out of your way."
There, those were words, sentences even. Now all he had to do was act normal and finish cleaning. Easy.
"So, Brandy and Monica, right? You like R'n'B then?" Zayn asked him, walking into the room with a heavy dance bag, setting it off to the side.
Liam felt himself flushing as he turned back around to finish cleaning the mirror so Zayn wouldn't see. "Yeah," he answered, trying not to peek at Zayn bending over as he rifled through his belongings.
Those legs, Fuck. Liam wondered what it'd feel like to have them around his-
"I didn't expect that," Zayn said, drawing Liam out of his filthy thoughts, and making him turn back around.
"What?"
"No, I- I didn't mean it in a bad way or anything. I guess I just expected you to listen to more rock?"
Liam was pretty sure he missed half of the conversation somewhere. Was Zayn blushing? He was so pretty. Wow.
"No, I like everything," he replied dumbly. They were still talking about music, right? That would make sense. Why was Zayn talking to him again? God, Liam couldn't handle this. "Do you like it? The music, I mean."
"Yeah, grew up listening to ‘em. My older sister was obsessed with Monica. So... Who's your favourite artist?"
"Artist? Oh uh, I've been listening to a lot of Post Malone? How about you? What do you- who do you listen to?"
"Post Malone's sick, mate. I like most music I guess, but I've been listening to a lot of The Weekend."
"Have you heard his new album?"
"Yeah, it's sick! Do you-" Zayn was cut off by Niall running in out of breath. The bright orange tee that labelled him as one of the community service workers was wet and stained black. Actually.. all of him was soaked and stained black. Was that ink?
"Hey, Payno, are you done yet because we have a situation upstairs," Niall gasped out, hands on his knees, looking like he'd just seen his life flash before his eyes.
"What the hell happened to you?"
"There's a squid stick in the toilet."
"There's a what?"
"A Squid! A giant fucking squid in the toilet!"
Liam blinked in confusion, trying to wrap his head around why there would be a squid anywhere near the theatre let alone one of the toilets. Did Corden want live animals in his show now? Or Winston. It could be either of them.
"Why do you need me?" he asked. "I don't know anything about squids."
Niall sounded like he was at the end of his rope when he replied, "You know something about plumbing at least!"
"Not a lot! Enough to keep the water on at home, but I'm not a plumber."
"Doesn't matter, we need your help, Ashtons gone to find some butter," Niall said, stomping back around, leaving behind a trail of watery black ink. "We'll meet you upstairs when you're done."
"Wait, what do you need butter for?!" Liam called after him but didn't get a reply. Butter? How was butter going to help?
A muffled giggle distracted Liam from his thoughts, and he was abruptly reminded Zayn was still in the room. Zayn, might as well be a god, was in the room, and Liam was just talking about squids in toilets.
Why him?
"I guess I should go see what they need help with?" Liam tried to say without sounding... Well, he wasn't sure what the proper response was in this situation or how to react to it.
Zayn smiled at him, and oh. How was it possible he looked even more attractive now?
Liam thinks Zayn said something about the other lads needing him and it sounding urgent, but really, Liam was in a daze until he also got a face full of ink... From another squid in an entirely different toilet.
What the fuck.
Louis was never going to let him live this down.
Really? Squids???
#yeah idk#my fic#ballerino au#genuinely have questions for myself#why is it always crack#ngl I'd be interested in seeing Winstons 'historical' play and Corden's musical#if only to know what the hell my own brain is coming up with#the globus theatre is its own warning#lmao#Ziam au#Ziam fic#idiot boys with crushes#Liam is a simp
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The Next Karate Kid - A Probably Very Opinionated Commentary by Yours Truly
I really am trying to go into this with an open mind; let’s see how this goes.
Starting off with a military band? K sure, you do you sweetie, and I don’t hate it yet so that’s a positive
Aha, a military REUNION, I see. And look at Miyagi with his medal!! Sweet!
So I think if I remember from reading the plot on wikipedia that Miyagi new this guy who was married to the woman he just said hello to
Y’all they got Miyagi’s name wrong. His first name is Nariyoshi not Kesuke. That is his middle name. Although in saying that, I feel like that was more or less revealed in Cobra Kai so idk, anyway, for future reference, Miyagi’s first name is Nariyoshi
Also Louisa Pierce? I assume grandmother of Julie? That would make sense
Ooh we’re in Boston for this, and look at that big white house
Yes, Louisa is grandmother, oh and hello Julie!
Julie is unhappy, a little moody, sweetie are you okay?
Alright so Julie’s an orphan! Why does Miyagi keep picking up either somewhat or completely orphaned children?? I mean, I guess that’s good but also, why?
Ooh yay Miyagi advice about losing parents and grief!
Alright so now Louisa’s gonna fuck off to California while Miyagi takes care of the child
Said child who has now snuck into some place - OH THAT”S RIGHT THE SCHOOL AND THE BIRD
Yes I remember this from wikipedia plot
I like birdy, birdy is nice, and yes Julie talk to birdy, birdy is unjudgemental friend
Now time for the Animal Studies me to take over, that wing is NOT bandaged securly at all. Wing bandages should be wrapped around the wing and on the body, to keep the damaged wing still, thank you very much
Police have come! Julie gonna get arrested, maybe? Unless girl escapes, although that’s evading police then, and now she threw a torch, that’s attempted assault. Idk what it’s like in the USA, but in my state (Queensland, AUS) that’s a $5,500 fine and 50 days in jail (evasion), and a $5,338 - $8,007 fine and 6 - 12 months in jail (police assault, depends on severity)
Have fun in prison, Julie! Oop, nevermind she’s home again
Anyway, I wonder what Daniel’s doing at this time. Wiki says Julie was born in 1977, which is a whole ten years after Daniel, and considering she’s in high school I’d say she’s about 16/17 in this movie, which brings us to like 1993/1994. Perhaps this was around the time he met Amanda, maybe even started dating her? They got married in 1998 (I believe), so it would make sense for that to happen
Bonding moment for Louisa and Julie? No, nevermind
Miyagi’s happy! Love that! He’s going to make special birthday dinner!
Straight of the bat though like the dynamics are so different. Like the moment Daniel ever so much as raises his voice at Miyagi, the dude’s a little disheartened whereas Julie talks shit here and Miyagi’s like “haha, you’re funny, anyway, let’s talk about Japanese cuisine, yes?”
Okay but I LOVE the fucking ‘sayonara’ and dissapointed headshake like, man, Miyagi, legend
This school’s nothing compared to West Valley imo
Alos that little gang? Those coordinated outfits? Do y’all not have a personality? Feel like the Cobras get a win on being comfortable with their own skin whilst also maintaining such a well-formed group
You can see I’m biased, and I’ll probably remain biased, because, two seconds into seeing this Boston group and I’m already dissappointed by the lack of personality. Again, two seconds of Cobras and y’all know you’re in for a ride, and a good one at that
I like the little garden corner that Julie’s at it’s very nice and peaceful
Back to the group, they look like real dickheads. Also, Ned? Shit name for a ‘bad boy’. Also, please stop trying to coerce Julie
I’ve seen this fucker for, what, a minute, if that? And I absolutely hate everything about him. I also don’t like how he sorta just, enters?? Like, at least with the Cobras we knew what their intentions were right off the bat. Here, well, what does Ned want Julie for? Why does he want her with him and his friends? Like, please establish that before anything else
Also why he standing like a Roblox character
The Alpha League? Really? Y’all really tryna be cool with that aren’t ya? Do I smell some toxic masculinity? I think I do?
WHY DOES THAT HIGH SCHOOL DUDE LOOK LIKE HE’S 30 DUDE
Ew I hate that school bell
Please get out of the girl’s bathroom sir
Not the fucking wing bandage again, jesus christ. And shot in the wing?? Y’all really gotta have that shit strapped then, STOP LETTING THE BIRD MOVE HER WING THAT IS GOING TO DAMAGE IT MORE
“I’ll call Dominos Pizza and have them deliver 48 pizzas to your house in the middle of the night” ma’am that is a dream come true, first of all, and second of all, please work on your threats, thank you
Okay but is this military training or phys ed??
Miyagi looks so nice in his checkered shirt! Anyway, I swear that’s like the only thing I love about this movie, Mr Miyagi that is
Teacher just slapped a kid and choked him, alrighty then
Oop and here comes Miyagi, defending kids since 1984!!
Love that. “Boy, you okay?” like just the delivery of this line it’s so neutral I love it
Ah yes, threatening a bastard with a story about a bull, the best
Honestly stan how passive-aggressive Miyagi is at any given time
Yeah okay but honestly it would be better for that bird to be taken away considering that god awful bandaging job
“It’s just a car” EXCUSE YOU JULIE, as a car person myself I take PERSONAL offence to that. That’s not just a car, that’s his child, his other half, his soulmate, his everything, thank you very much
That’s right tell her off for saying that, good lad
On a sidenote; my video quality is shit, like super shit, because I’m streaming on Netflix and there’s a few other people in the house using internet so like, :(
“For a while he was sending money and then one day he just stopped” ah yes, every child of divorced parents can relate to this statement very well
i’m sorry but the music is so cheesy
anyway, i was gonna say that this movie lacks something, and i remembered what it is, and that is love. Like with KK1, 2, and 3, you can tell a lot of love and heart and soul went into making those movies (maybe not as much with 2 and 3, but it was still there and in good amounts). Meanwhile, this just feels like a cashgrab (which it is, and a very failed one at that)
Like, when will people learn that well-crafted media will get you better reviews/more money/whatever?
I hate this fucking background music so much jesus christ please kill it
Please tell someone about the hawk i am worried for its health
The fact that Miyagi has lived with Daniel so long to a point where he’s forgotten he has to actually knock on doors (because you bet your ass Daniel was and still is the type of person who really just doesn’t give a single fuck about who sees him doing what)
This poor man tbh. So ashamed of himself
FUCKING I WAS RIGHT I LITERALLY JUST SAID THAT WHOLE SHIT ABOUT MIYAGI AND DANIEL NOT GIVING TWO SHITS ABOUT SEEING EACH OTHER DO WHATEVER AND NOW MIYAGI’S JUST OUTRIGHT CONFIRMED THAT
“Boy is easier” 100% I will agree, hence the reason I’d like sons in the future. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I’d like at least 1 daughter as well but holy hell are females complicated (and I should know because I am one)
“Don’t order me around” sweetie, he isn’t ordering you, he’s making a helpful suggestion. Please stop the Miyagi slander, my man does NOT deserve this treatment
Miyagi, love you bb, but please don’t waste your advice on Julie at the moment
Speaking of, I greatly dislike Julie, but you know why that is? Because she’s really not been fleshed out as a charater, unlike the others we see in the KKU. Like her one redeeming quality is that she looks after a bird, but even that isn’t redeeming to me because she isn’t caring for it properly, like please take it to a fucking veterinarian
I feel like I’d enjoy Julie more if she was actually fleshed out but like, no, no, she’s just a whole “I’m an orphan so I’m always angsty grr” character and I just - I’m disappointed
Same goes for the other characters; again, the only thing/person I love about this movie so far is Miyagi, and with the way it’s been in these first 25 minutes, I doubt that’ll change
Yeah no I really fucking hate Julie. “You can’t even speak English” she says, even though she has understood every single word Miyagi has said thus far
Ah yes because people can definitely jump on cars and cars can definitely go unnoticed for such a long period of time in a quiet neighbourhood
I honestly feel like giving up on this movie like it’s so bad
But I want to see more Miyagi so 😬
No offence to Hilary Swank but her line delivery could do a bit more work during the ‘emotional scen’ with her and Miyagi
And again, music, hate it
I am literally willing to turn this movie off even if it means I don’t get to see more Miyagi content
Like I can not express my displeasure for this movie enough
Yes, Miyagi, same, I hate the 12am rock concert in Julie’s bedroom to. Like please, gurl, some of us have sleep schedules
Okay so now Julie’s worried about her appearance?? Y’all just made my hatred for her character rise again. When was she ever worried about that? imo this is just put in there to make people remember that she’s still “girl uwu 😙✌”
Haha, yes, pay Miyagi with the homework that’s right
Bet he did that with Daniel after the tournament like “you do homework, I teach karate”
“Boys easier” AGAIN I AGREE SO MUCH MIYAGI
Okay so I’ve sat through 33 minutes of this bullshit and I am going to quit for today. I’m sorry to anyone that does like this movie, but like I really don’t, it sucks in so many ways. Words cannot describe the sheer amount of dissapointment I have for this. Like, it could have been good! The idea is solid and the base of the characters is somewhat okay! And yet they made this shit instead of something actually worthwhile!
I will continue tomorrow, but for now I just need a break from this before I hit something.
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April 4, 2021: The Great Dictator (1940) (Part One)
So, Charlie’s been having an...interesting few years.
His marriage to Lita Grey has resulted in children, and a BITTER-AS-FUCK divorce, with Grey alleging that Chaplin had subjected her to “sexual perversions”. Other than the whole “she was 16, he was 35″ thing, which is...bad, obviously, Chalin was also a fan of orgies, fondling, and...pies. Yeah. Pies. Warning here, the next paragraph is...uncomfortable.
Dude would allegedly audition actresses having then sit on a couch, strip naked for him, and then he’d grope them on said couch. Then, he’d have them stand up against the wall, and he’d...well, he’d throw pies at them. Yeah. Um. He, uh...yeah.
I know, Matt Mercer, I know. And Hollywood agreed, because they didn’t really see to care? This info, amongst other stuff that I can’t seem to find out more about, was enough for grounds of divorce against Chaplin, and Lita Grey was gone from his life, taking the kids and a lot of money with her.
Film fame continued for Chaplin, though, and his 1927 film The Circus was a huge hit. But now, the “talkie” had been invented, and Chaplin HATED it. He believed that it was an unartistic addition to the medium, eliminating the need for his pantomiming. And, uh...he was technically right about that last point. He chose not to give the Tramp a voice, and made the film City Lights, which came out in 1931, and is considered one of his greatest films.
But the writing was VERY MUCH on the wall at this point, and silent films were a thing of the past. Still, City Lights did really well, and was Chaplin’s favorite of his films. Then, in 1932, he met Pauline Goddard (who was 21), and she would eventually become his third wife. He made his next major (still silent) film, Modern Times, in 1936, and it didn’t do quite as well. That’s because Chaplin had started to become more politically conscious, and used the film to make commentary on the industrialization of the USA, which he disliked. And that, interestingly enough, was a sign of the end for Chaplin.
Still, the film was good, as was still popular then and now. But in the years to follow, something else would rear its head and plague Chaplin...something with the same mustache.
Hooooooo boy. Yeah, Hitler was rising to power in the 1930s, and Chaplin fuckin’ HAAAAAAAATED HIM. At the time, remember, Hitler’s fascist policies definitely weren’t universally derided, and he didn’t show his true monstrous colors in the early 1930s. But, Chapin still understandably disagreed with his politics and character, which was interesting for a few reasons. The two were bourn FOUR DAYS APART FROM EACH OTHER, had similar rags-to-riches origins, and both used that same toothbrush mustache. But Hitler was a feverish militaristic nationalist dictator, and Chaplin was...not that.
However, this would inspire Chaplin’s next ambitious film, considered to be one of his greatest films ever, and his first ever talkie film. And one that would age interestingly, considering what would come afterwards. In 1939, Chaplin began making this film, the United Kingdom declared war of Germany, and Europe became embroiled in the Second World War. And then, in 1940, Chaplin’s controversial (at the time) film, The Great Dictator was released. And...oh BOY, this will be Chaplin’s high and low point, lemme tell you.
But enough history (for now)! Let’s jump into this movie; I’m very excited! SPOILERS AHEAD!!!
Recap (1/2)
WAR!!! A world war has ended, and another is about to begun! The small (fictional) country of Tomainia is preparing for war by testing their gigantic anti-aircraft gun, Big Bertha. Helping with these efforts is a Jewish Barber (Charlie Chaplin), and YES. THAT IS HOW HE’S CREDITED. After some comedic hijinks with the gun, and with one of the large shells, enemy aircraft is sighted ahead.
The Barber gets aboard another anti-aircraft gun (which he has no control over), but soon falls off of it. He’s directed into the trenches with the others, and is given a grenade, which he has no idea to use, and Chaplin shows that his physical comedy is as funny WITH sound as it was without.
On the battlefield, the Barber encounters and rescues a downed pilot, Commander Schultz, and helps him back t his plane as the enemy approaches. They get on the plane together, only for the pilot to repeatedly faint in mid-air. In the process, they begin to fly upside down for a period, and once again, Chaplin shows that he’s just as funny speaking as he was silent.
Despite their attempts, the pair crash as the plane runs out of fuel, but both men survive. The country has lost the war at this point, and the Barber is now unconscious and brought to a hospital. 20 years pass, and he’s finally able to leave, unaware of how his country of Tomainia has changed in the process. Now, they are ruled by a ruthless dictator, Adenoid Hynkel (Charlie Chaplin).
And i case you were wondering what the phrase “on the nose” actually meant...GODDAMN, this is an on-the-nose parody of Hitler. I mean, it’s very funny, of course, but HOT DAMN is it not even a little bit subtle. Also, living in a post-Trump world...Jesus, this is eerie. Anyway, the other reason this film is great is the fake German. And yeah, honestly, this is a very funny scene, even with the dark undertone, and the knowledge of what would be to come in World War II under Hitler’s regime.
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Alongside his primary aides, Minister of War Herring (Billy Gilbert) and Secretary of the Interior (and Minister of Propaganda) Garbitsch (Henry Daniell), he makes a speech that’s clearly a parody of Hitler’s speeches. He also namedrops the Jewish population in the speech, which immediately makes them a target by his stormtroopers. This is noted by Mr. Jaeckel (Marice Mossovich), an elderly Jewish man who lives in the ghettos of Tomainia.
Mr. Jaeckel bemoans the fate of the country under Hynkel’s rule, and also notes the fate of those like his tenant, a young woman named Hannah (Paulette Goddard) who lost her parents since the last war. He also mentions the Barber, who writes every few weeks to say that he’ll be back soon. Just then, the Barber actually DOES wake up, completely unaware of what’s occurred in the last few years.
He heads to his barber shop, which has been boarded up, with the word “Jew” painted on the boards. Did I mention that this is a very on-the-nose satire? Anyway, he attempts to reopen his shop, only to be savaged by stormtroopers following Hynkel’s orders to control the ghetto. He fights back against two of them, and is saved by Hannah, who had attempted to stand up to them earlier with little success. They bond over this, and become friends.
But Hynkel’s savaged even more by a crowd of stormtroopers next, and they grab him with the intent to hang him from a lamppost, only for him to be saved by Commander Schultz, the pilot from the plane! He guarantees that he will never be attacked again, and that courtesy extends to his friends. He barber reopens his shop, and begins to fall in love with Hannah in the process.
Back to Hynkel. He’s enduring Herring’s introductions of military technology, including a bulletproof uniform and a parachute hat. Neither work, to hilarious effect. He then speaks to Garbitsch about the financial state of affairs in the country, which aren’t great. Gabitsch sugggests speaking with a banker, Epstein, to finance the money.
Garbitsch, by the way, is a massive Grima Wormtongue figure, and basically just fuels his megaloaniacal fervor, convincing him to extend his desires to the world at large, not just limit them to their small country of Tomainia. Soon, well...soon, the world will be in the hands of Emperor Hynkel; an Aryan world in the hands of a brunette dictator. And that starts YET ANOTHER of the most iconic scenes of the film. But only one of the most iconic.
It’s darkly beautiful, in and out of context. And eventually, the inflatable globe pops, which makes this even more poignant. Meanwhile, in the ghetto, the Barber is doing his best Bugs Bunny impression and cutting hair to a classical music piece (Brahms’ Hungarian Dance No. 5). Bugs did the whole Barber of Seville routine WAY after this in Rabbit of Seville in 1950. One of the best Bugs Bunny shorts ever.
Back in the palace, bad news arrives. Epstein, the banker, has refused to give Hynkel any money, as he’s Jewish, and is protesting against the persecution of his people in the ghetto. Hynkel immediately decides to double down on his attacks on the ghettos, which he calls on Schultz to perform. But he refuses, noting that the persecution of an innocent people will only serve to demoralize the entire country. Hynkel sends Schultz to a concentration camp as a result, and proceeds on his path.
In the ghetto, people have been doing OK, as the stormtroopers had been lightening up their attacks on the ghetto, to attempt to please Epstein to get more money. But no more of that. As Hannah and the Barber are about to go on a date, loudspeakers broadcast an angry speech from Hynkel, in fake German. And while it’s never translated...the reactions from the populus, Hannah, and the Barber, aren’t difficult to read. Hynkel just waged war on the ghetto and the Jews.
Well, will you look at that; a halfway point! Let’s stop here, then head into a Part Two. See you there!
#the great dictator#charlie chaplin#paulette goddard#jack oakie#henry daniell#reginald gardiner#billy gilbert#maurice mossovich#comedy april#user365#365 movie challenge#365 movies 365 days#365 Days 365 Movies#365 movies a year#365days365movies
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My First Two Loves.
First Time Love. Part 1.
A/N: I’ve read a multitude of books. And this one is becoming one that I thoroughly enjoy. So; Talley Ho! *in my Sherlock Holmes voice*
Rated: Mature. Contains sexual content, brief mention of violence and strong language. You know? The basic usual from me. 😁 | Bolded and/or italicized words are conversations and thoughts of the characters. | Characters: Isaiah Harris (LI) and Kailah Price (MC) | All Characters: names (except MC) are property of Pixelberry. | All Characters are 18+ | A/N 2: This story follows the plots of Ch. 17 and 18. There are mentions of underage drinking in both this two part story and the original MTFL. This is also a story about sexual discovery. Reader discretion is STRONGLY advised. | A/N 3: Song and Story Inspiration: Chaka Demus And Pliers-Murder She Wrote | Childish Gambino-Redbone | Lita-Ciao Ciao | PJ Morton feat. JOJO-Say So | Rihanna feat Drake-Work | Daniel Caesar feat Brandy-Love Again | Current Word Count: 2,193 words.
Weekly Challenge Prompt: “I honestly don’t know.” This one was not only easy but hella fun! 😁
It was her first time ever experiencing something so life changing.
It was her first time experiencing him.
Let’s go back, shall we?
Kailah was excited for tonight. She was going to her bestie Brandi’s big bash. Brandi’s parents were gone for the weekend, she had the house to herself so what else does an 18yrold do? She throws a giant party for all of her friends and fellow seniors! Because; what 18yrold wouldn’t do that?
After she got herself all dolled up, and after she texted Isaiah and Jaylen a photo of her outfit; Kailah was down the steps; and headed for the door. Until she ran into her dad and had the biggest argument of her life with him. Not because of her grades or anything like that. No; it was because he felt she was abandoning her commitments in favor of; spending too much time with Isaiah.
And well; she felt like he was being a hypocrite and told him so. It wasn’t until she brought up her deceased mom that it all went left; and she was effectively grounded.
Leave it to her sister MacKenzie to come up with the plan of a lifetime. She was gonna sneak out and go to the party; despite her dad grounding her. Besides; she promised Isaiah she’d be there so she had to go. She didn’t want him to be there by himself.
When she got to the party; it was already popping and Brandi was already drunk. Kailah loved her best friend more than anything; but even she thought Brandi had over done it on the booze.
“Giiiiiiiiirrrrrrrrrrrrrrllllllllllll you made it! And damn you look sexy, baby! Somebody’s trying to get fucked tonight!”, Brandi said as she wobbled up to her best friend. “Babe! How much have you had to drink?”, Kailah asks her as she tries to peel her very drunken friend off of her.
“I honestly don’t know! I started drinking before everybody got here so…”, Brandi replied with a shrug; while trying to steady herself. “Okay! Let’s get you some water babe. You need it!”, Kailah says to her as she tries to steer her best friend to the kitchen.
That’s when Jaylen called out to them, “there you two are! And Brandi you don’t look so good.” “Kai was gonna get me some water! Isn’t she like the sweetest thing ever?!”, she drunkenly asked Jaylen before flinging herself across him. “Yeeeeeeah…I think I’ll get you that water. Come on.”, he tells her as he drags her to the kitchen. “Best! Boyfriend! Ever!!”, she drunkenly squeals as she follows him.
She hated to see them together so; she decided to find Isaiah. When she scanned the room she saw people; drinking, laughing, dancing and generally having a good time. But; she didn’t see Isaiah. Knowing Brandi’s house like the back of her hand; Kailah decided to check the backyard before she checked the basement. When she stepped onto the patio; she saw that the backyard was in shambles. But again; she didn’t see him.
Until he came up behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist. “You look like you lost something. Maybe I can help you find it.”, he whispered in her ear. She turned her head and smiled up at him. “Who told you to come out the house looking like a five course meal?”, he asked her; clearly letting his eyes roam over her body.
“Stop it! Are you enjoying the party?”, she asks him. “I mean if you wanna call high school cliches, cliques, loud music and spiked Jamba Juice a party then yeah; I’m having a blast!”, he says sarcastically with a shrug. She just rolled her eyes and giggled.
“But now that you’re here; I might just enjoy myself after all.”, he told her with wolfish grin.
“How’d you do on your test yesterday?”, she asks him. He raised his arms in victory and said, “nailed it!”
“Told you! Now all we gotta do is keep it up; and you’ll be pulling girls at Princeton in no time.”, she told him as she beamed with pride at him. He just shook his head at her.
“So, I was thinking about ditching this snooze fest.”, he told her. “Already?! Awwww!”, she pouted. It made him want to suck on her bottom lip. “I mean you could always come with me, ya know?”, he told her. “Ohhhh really? And where would we go; should we decide to leave?”, she asked him with eyebrow raised.
“We’d go back to my place. My mom doesn’t really have any restrictions on me having company over, plus my sister is at my cousins for a weekend sleepover thing and my brother is out with his friends for God knows how long; doing only God knows or who for that matter. So, we’d pretty much have the whole house to ourselves.”, he told her as he wrapped his arms around her again; and pulled her close so that she was flush with his chest.
“Tempting. And what would we do, alone at your place?”, she asked him in a not so innocent voice. “Whatever you want to do babe.”, he whispered in her ear. His voice was low and husky; and in sent a winding chill down her spine. Before she could answer; Jaylen popped around the corner; causing her to take a step back from Isaiah.
“Well! Well! Looks like juvie actually showed up, tonight! He’s not bothering you; is he?”, he asks her. While Isaiah rolled his eyes; she replied, “no Jay he’s not. We were just talking.”
“Are you sure? Because; you know that I can always have him thrown out of the party, right?”, he told her.
“Heyyyyy golden boy! Are you deaf? She just said that she’s fine!”, Isaiah snapped back at him; clearly agitated at this point.
“Who said I was talking to you, juvie?”, he told him. “Man! Don’t make me embarrass you in front of her!”, he replied to Jaylen. “Please do. Because; I’ve been dying for round 2 with you!”, he told him as he got up in Isaiah’s face. “I bet you have, golden boy! Especially with the way the last time went. You gotta regrow your balls somehow!”, he told him.
After remembering how the last time these two got into it turned out; Kailah stepped in between them.
“Stop it! Both of you! Jay I’m fine! I’ll be inside in a few. Go get the games started. We’ll be there shortly.”, she told him to get him to back down. Jaylen turned on his heel and went back inside.
That’s when she turned to Isaiah and said, “Isaiah please calm down! It’s not worth it!” She watched as he clenched and unclenched his fists.
But; soon he calmed down after he saw the look of concern on her face. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t let him get under my skin; but somehow he always does.”, he told her.
“It’s okay Isaiah. I know he can be aggravating at times. Trust me. Now let’s go play a couple games. And we can discuss leaving later.”, she told him as she led him back inside.
After a few rounds of truth or dare; that included Isaiah taking body shots off of Kailah and using her as a weight, Jaylen stripping down to his underwear and doing laps up and down the street and more than a few nearly embarrassing truths.
It was time for everyone’s favorite card game: Suck and Blow. The rules are simple: pass a card from person to person; by only using your mouth.
What started out innocent soon turned awkward between Kailah and Jaylen. When the card slipped from Jaylen’s lips before it reached hers. And; he inadvertently kissed her. “Oh geez! I’m so sorry, Kai! That wasn’t supposed to happen!”, he sheepishly told her. He had a look a completely embarrassed look on his face.
“It’s all good. ‘Twas an was accident. You good!”, she told him. In the very back of her mind; she wasn’t so sure that kiss was an accident or that he was sorry about it. Especially when she saw the irritated look on Isaiah’s face. But; it wasn’t her that he was irritated with. He knew that kiss wasn’t “accidental”. Or at least; he knew that it wasn’t an accidental kiss on Jaylen’s part.
After a few more crazy and hilarious rounds of Suck and Blow; the living room had dissolved into a full on dance floor. With bodies swaying to whatever random song played on Pandora; Kailah was hoping to dance with someone.
While Jaylen was dancing with a VERY drunk Brandi; Isaiah walked over and asked, “hey Kai…wanna dance?” She eagerly accepted his invitation.
Being that close to him, feeling his strong arms around her, dancing to the beat, inhaling the scent of his musky cologne. It all had changed the way she looked at him. The world just disappeared, when she was with him. It was there in that moment; where she realized how much she started to really deeply care about Isaiah.
That moment of internal bliss was interrupted by Lauren; when she swayed right into them both, spilling her drink on Kailah. “Seriously Lauren?! Look what you did!”, she snapped at her. “Whatever! Just go wash it out in the bathroom, you’ll be fine!”, Lauren snapped back.
Rather than punch Lauren in the face like she was dying to do; Kailah stormed off to guest bathroom to clean herself up. While she was in the bathroom cleaning herself up; she got a text from her dad.
Daddy-o: hey you two, they need me to work a double tonight. So I won’t be home until some time late tomorrow morning. Don’t wait up! Love you both. Goodnight.
Younger sister unit: Kk
Me: 👍🏾
That’s when there was a knock at the bathroom door.
“Hello in there! This is your friendly neighborhood chimney sweep calling!” With a giggle she replied, “you’re an idiot Isaiah! The door isn’t locked.” When he entered the bathroom behind her; she soon found herself alone with him. “Damn. Brandi’s parents must have some serious money. This is a nice ass guest bathroom!”, he said before asking her, “You okay? I came to check on you.”
“Yeah I’ll live. I just a got text from my dad. According to him, he’s working a double at the hospital; and won’t be home until some time tomorrow morning.”, she told him. He cocked an eyebrow at her with mischievous grin on his face and said, “so that means that you and I can go around town and cause mischief and mayhem!” She shook her head at him and said, “and what kind of mischief did you have in mind, Mr. Harris?”
“Well Ms. Price, the mischief I had in mind begins with us; getting the fuck outta here and going somewhere much quieter.”, he told her. “Is this your way of asking me to go with you; back to your place, Mr. Harris?”, she asked. “Not in so many words but; yeah.”, he replied as she wrapped her arms around his neck. “Hmmmm…I’d love to!”, she said. His eyes lit up like a Christmas tree.
“Perfect! There’s just one thing.”, he said. “What? What is it?”, she asked. “I’ve just been thinking about that so called kiss you shared with golden boy.”, he told her.
She grimaced as she thought back to it. “I’m sorry Isaiah. I wasn’t trying to be a jerk to you.”, she said to him. “I ain’t mad at you, Kai. It just got me to thinking. That’s all.”, he said to her. “Thinking about what?”, she asked. “It got me to thinking; why does golden boy get to have all the fun?”, he said to her. “What do you mea—“, was all she said before his lips devoured hers.
His kiss was hot, hungry, powerful and definitely horny. When their kiss was finally broken; she was out of breath and he was apologetic. “I’m sorry…I shouldn’t have done that.”, he told her. “No, you shouldn’t have!”, she said before she pulled him into another hot kiss. He effortlessly picked her up and sat her on the sinks’ marble counter.
With her legs around his waist; he leaned her back towards the bathroom mirror. They couldn’t get enough of each other. He started to trail hot kisses down her jaw and the hollow between her neck and her ear. Doing so, not only made her whole body hot but; it made her shiver. He wanted to keep going but; he stopped to whisper in a low growl, “ohhh yeah. We are definitely getting the fuck outta here, now!” She simply smirked at him and said, “Well…lead the way.”
With that; he pulled her off the counter and out of the bathroom and house they went, no goodbyes to anyone, nothing. They just left. When they got outside, he tossed her his extra helmet, she climbed on the back of his bike and they were gone. They were on their way back to his place; for a very fun end to their evening.
Stay tuned for Part 2!
😘
K.
Tag list: @txemrn @choicesficwriterscreations @choicesweeklychallenge @lucy-268
#choices#choices fanfiction#pixelberry#choices stories you play#fanfic#khoicesbyk#pb mftl#mftl#choices mftl#my first two loves
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Cobra Kai LOVE
So I finally got to watch all of Cobra Kai after loving the first two free episodes on Youtube but not affording it or having access til Netflix.
Dad and I nostalgia tripped it together and it's so good and it was also a great little family thing to do for us, since we always watched the movies as a family and are missing Mom, and I cried (there were some moments in season 2 especially hard) and laughed and we both loved it and I can't wait for season 3.
What can you say about a show that picks up 30 years after a properties heyday and kills as a tie-in! That honours the themes, and even better the cheese and feelings of the originals. Be it kick-ass karate, 80s style and music, the over the top plotting, and the profound kinda searching for inner life peace mixed with silly karate moves or metaphors and longing for Dad guidance.
I absolutely adore Johnny, who is by no means a perfect person. He's a stunted functional alcoholic who reopens his best part of his life, he tragically peaked in high-school (Christ!), for the best intentioned reasons, not realizing until committing the same mistakes how toxic it was the first go round.
Daniel. Oh you sweet fucking it up-ward man. Every movie was Miyagi having to help you pull your hot head out of your own ass because you were desperate to earn inner acceptance through outer validation and he's not around to do it anymore and you sweet pea think you've got it figured out, that you can give it to kids or protect them from the bullying toxicity of the way that high-school and a loss of place moving to California and Cobra Kai did you in, but you just keep jumping from victim to projecting and anticipating victim-hood and responding against Miyagi's first lesson, learn karate so you don't have to use it to fight.
It's sad and beautiful that these two are twinned and stuck in their pasts. Man-children in their 50s still trying to grow up (And figure out technology in Johnny's case LOL) hurting their future generation.
The teen themes are great.
Teen Breakdown of S1 & S2
The beginning popular crowd being easy and simple bullies. Morphing in Season 2 as both Cobra Kai and Demetri, Robbie and Sam trade off with Hawk and Tory on are we the bullied or the bullies all at once. Free for all high-school fight!
Aisha and Miguel represent the honesty of strength of self and confidence in finding themselves and their voice in Cobra Kai.
Hawk and Demitri, of using a newfound self to bully or staying safe to play victim.
Robbie as the growth from getting respect and guidance from Miyagi karate and Daniel, being the truest student, to the heartbreaking reality it doesn't mean you still don't crave wanting to be declared ultimate right or winner and fuck yourself over with your past issues.
As Miguel does the twin tango with him in having innate respectability and good moral guidance, even passing it to Johnny, but slipping into loss at the karate finals, mentally giving into loss of morality being violent to show his strength and losing himself and his GF, and physically when he's hurt (please be just hurt) defending the good guidance of mercy and stopping fighting.
But yeah, I could do essays on all the teens.
Then there's Sam, Daniel 's daughter. Robbie's mirror student and Aisha should be her foil but I fear based on a rumour and the way of season 2, they went with the easier and show attractive rival GF Tory. Samantha Larusso is a problem. She is marked good, to be going the way of Robbie to being the child of the former protagonist that leads into a creation of harmony among the two karate's and teachers/families/philosophies. Instead despite the show sympathizing and trying to identify with her as that role, she's straight up a cause of strife and exhibits neither the good traits of Miyagi karate, or a inner self confident bravado of Cobra Kai. She's almost the bizzaro evil version of a teen Ali, and that guy from the third movie. She thinks she's both victim and bad ass and she's just someone who needs a good dose of someone sitting her down to tell her she's owed or earned either status. And Aisha, the friend she wasted for faux status as a popular pretty girl, as well as her adult parents letting her currently skate responsibilities of teenage dramas and violence, and her suitors, whom she waffles unhealthy betwixt so that they all suffer, are the ones to do it. She doesn't need her ass kicked by Tory, who is a one note character, she needs her mindset toggled by realizing her self-wants aren't priority. Basically grow up, and outta the me mentality.
What's fabulous is the show honoring it's roots in teen drama and life so it's not like the drama is too over the top. How their world revolves around them and their perception of the importance of their wants. Romance. Party. Popularity. Identity.
Leading to the teenage version of power posturing. Bullying. (Which even the adults haven't mastered escape from.)
The high-school pettiness and importance of structure and status and coolness. The different norms of today versus the 80's that are still about wealth, the right looks (cultural or physical), and violence being the forever enforcer. Of course kids will break down along the lines of Cobra Kai and Miyagi karate. Brute correctness or passive acceptance?
Seeking strength and refusing to accept weakness of self builds confidence. Using that strength to physically fight in anything but defense brings a cycle of conflict and violence.
Neither the past nor the present generation ignore the other big life influence of the age. There you have the Daddy or parental abandonment angles.
Johnny's step dad failed him in absentee. Kreese used his position as teacher to abuse him. Johnny failed his kid in absentee. Johnny tries to uses his teacher position with Miguel to fix all these errors. Meanwhile Daniel is over there in the opposite corner with lost his father figure, and then Miyagi taught him respect and guidance and Daniel regained one and clung, and now Daniel is a lost or losing father figure to his own son and daughter, the family unit does not respect him or seek his guide. So he entwines his then teaching Sam and Robbie as a fix.
But does karate fix this shit?
So all these kids they drag in are confounded by the lessons because a step would be stop you yokels and talk or acknowledge what really happened in high-school and with All Valley and Ali and Kreese and Miyagi. And move on.
You won 30 years ago Daniel. Miyagi was a great old man and your teacher and like a Dad but you never had to be the best or have the girl to earn him. You got bullied by Kreese & co, were devalued because you weren't rich or popular in high-school. Some people were dicks. Or worse. Tell the world. You don't have to beat them now and forever to hold to knowing that. Be a happy car salesman and focus on your own kids.
Johnny, 30 years have passed my dude. You were okay with defeat when you gave Daniel that trophy and said he was all right. Cling to that guy, not the jerk with a shitty teacher/Dad, pining for a girl you were in conflict with. And stop reliving the mindset you were the loser in those things ending. You missed out on living with your losses and celebrating the moments between and after. Find a GF. Reconcile with your biological son. Admire and mentor your students of now. Take a lesson from your Miguel and be like the young man you clearly are learning from. You will never be a loser to this kid, you will always be the bad ass who defended him.
Also also, I hilariously crack-ship Daniel/Johnny as a love hate bromance. HEAD GAMES vid it!!
Also, Daniel's wife is a treasure with her snark on the childishness of this karate feud. She the MVP.
And I legit cried with my Dad and the Miyagi grave visit. At the Tommy scenes. At the Miguel voicemail. At the Mrs. Larusso Dad on my shoulder scene.
And you can't not laugh at dick billboard.
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