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fairlyang · 5 months

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Feelings 🕷️

miguel contemplating his feelings for you

w/c: 1.9K

pairing: grumpy!miguel o’hara x f!reader

tags: more fluff than smut, slowly opening up, miguels pov, catching feels fast, his friends notice, 18+ smut. small bit of smut at the end, his thoughts get dirtier, cums by hearing your voice

part two

miguel o'hara who didn't believe in love at first sight or soulmates until the day you clumsily bumped into him on your first day at HQ and you looked up at him

"oh god- I'm so sorry!!!" you said nervously looking up at the man who you instantly realized was the boss of this place based on the description gwen was giving you earlier.

"You're fine, don't worry about it." he said waving you off which confused gwen and hobie who were watching from afar

miguel o'hara who was never upfront about his feelings or even wanting to open up to you but you were just so sweet and didn't bug him like everyone else

"Did you eat today Miguel? Drink enough water?" You'd ask kindly, really wanting to make a good first impression on your new boss on your first week.

"Yeah- yeah I did Y/n" he'd say and let out a sigh unsure on if he should continue having small convos like these with you

miguel o'hara who didn't exactly kick you out of his office when you'd wander in often after your first month at the spider society

"Hey Miguel!" you waltzed in with your usual cheery voice and wide grin

"hey" he mumbled after checking over some reports from other spider people before turning to look at you

"I brought you some chile rojo! Pues es asado, como dice mi mamá pero es lo mismo!" you say and present him a small tupperware of the food you had made for dinner last night

he eyes the container then looks up at you, your eyes not looking like you were fucking with him. He stands up and reaches for it, you gladly pass it to him and he quickly opens it. The instant smell of seasonings and of course, the guajillo chili filling his nostrils. He lets out a chuckle and gives you a small smile, "thank you"

miguel o'hara who told peter b parker that he wasn't interested in you but then when peter asked what he'd do if he saw someone asking you out on a date he couldn't exactly hide the vein on his neck from popping out or the way his fangs appeared

"well if you weren't interested then why is your-"

"fuck off" miguel snarled making peter shake his head and shrug

"hey- not like it'd be a bad thing." peter mumbled before walking out of his office leaving miguel alone with his thoughts

miguel o'hara who was eventually letting himself laugh at your stupid jokes as well as really start to pay attention to your stories about your day

"so then our professor told him to get the fuck out before he called security to grab him and kick him out." you explained talking about another mischievous student in one of your lectures. He just scoffed and shook his head while looking at files on his screens

miguel o'hara who started asking you questions about your parents and friends back at your earth, then listening to you very attentively

"how are your parents doing?" he asked and you smiled and leaned against his desk as he looked up at you from his seat

"they're good, they just planted some new veggies in their backyard!" you say excitedly and he just chuckled and nodded before you rambled on about their garden

miguel o'hara who slowly felt himself smiling and laughing along with you when you'd be in his office when you weren't off catching anomalies, now two months after you joined

"so you mean to tell me-"

"Yes!"

"Your brother just thought he'd get his way-"

"And it's not the first time!" you say and bite your lip fighting the urge to burst out laughing

he couldn't contain himself and let out fits of laughter, his smile being very visible making you grin

miguel o'hara who had a shocked face when you told him you'd made a new and improved version of his serum, just for him, and feeling incredibly impressed with your skills in the lab

"You made this-"

"Well I had some help from lyla with a few components but i've worked in a lab before and put together a list then made it to help you out a bit." you said with a small smile and held the vial up to him, not precisely saying it was for the slight anger issues he's been having lately

he looked at it, dumbfounded at the nice act but then he took it gently from your hands and smiled, "thank you... I appreciate it." he said and felt his heart race as you gave him a smile back

miguel o'hara who couldn't help but ask lyla to help him make a new suit for you (that was like his), which made her tease him for the entire duration of the conversation. she left him a flustered and stuttering mess, saying he just wanted to return the nice favor.

lyla popped up next to his face and narrowed her eyes at him making him grumble, "you're delusional."

lyla just responded with a sassy "sureeeee."

"Just help me with this-" he groaned and rolled his eyes

"And don't tell anybody about this!" he said quickly and she mocks him before disappearing out of thin air

miguel o'hara who couldn't help his heart from nearly exploding out of his chest after seeing your reaction to your new suit

you gasped and your eyes had widened at the new suit, almost identical design as your old one, same colors and everything but it just looked so much better. "Miguel-"

you stop and walk up to it and feel the sleeve softly, almost afraid you'd break something so pretty. "I- uh- wanted to thank you. for the serum." he said standing off to the side, feeling his heart race yet again

"you didn't have to-"

"I wanted to." he cuts in and you look to the side and look up at him.

"thank you." you say looking into his eyes as you walk up wrapping your arms behind his neck, giving him a hug

he nearly froze but then once he felt your head pressed against his chest he couldn't help but hug you back. "it's no problem." he whispered shakily, as he gently wraps his arms around your small figure

miguel o'hara who was beginning to be in denial about his feelings and wanted to talk about it with someone but not wanting it to get back to you

"I just- every time I see her- no- every time she's near-" he tried to say and just sighs, sinking into the couch shaking his head in disbelief

"God I didn't think I'd feel this way towards her-" he says and lets out another sigh

he heard little giggles and felt some weight on his head, "you're probably suggesting I let her know huh?" he says as mayday climbs down from his head and onto his shoulder then plops down onto his lap

she looks up at him with a toothy grin and points to him and lets out more giggles. "yeah I probably should." he whispers and holds out his hand to her which she gladly takes and begins twiddling with his fingers

miguel o'hara who nearly slipped up when ranting to himself not knowing you walked in

"le debo de decir- no- no... it'd ruin everything-" he muttered and shook his head, unknowing that you just walked in (I should tell her)

you furrow your brows as you walk closer to his platform, wanting to hear what he was going on about. "I just can't help it-"

"help what?" you butted it and he felt his heart sink and instantly cleared his throat

"nothing don't worry about it.”

"But-"

"I said don't worry about it." he says sternly, almost sounding mad which made you jump a bit considering he's never shown you any type of hostility or raised his voice at you

"I'm sorry- I just- don't worry about it." he apologizes calmly, not meaning to startle you

you gulp and nod, sitting up on his desk and looking up at him. "You alright?"

"Y-yeah- yeah I will be don't worry." he whispers and you nod, wanting to believe him

miguel o'hara who was losing his mind and unable to get you out of his head, the younger spiders instantly noticing there was something up in his behavior

"you sure you're good?" gwen asked looking at miguel suspiciously

"yes I'm fine-"

"then how come you have googly eyes whenever you're near y/n?" hobie cuts in with a smirk on his face as miguel's eyes widen

"Ah and 'ere's all the confirmation." hobie teased making miguel groan

"don't say a word." he threatens looking at them both

"alright big man we won't." hobie says giving him a wink while gwen just laughs

miguel o'hara who really couldn't keep it together anymore and his mind was going to other places

he really didn't know when his brain made a switch to thinking of taking you out on a first date and giving you flowers or even helping you catch an anomaly one day to just thinking of him slamming into you while you were underneath him whimpering for him

how badly he wanted to slip inside you and see the face you'd make once you felt him in your entrance, and also the face you'd make when he slowly slipped inside you, knowing full well you'd be tight

he couldn't help thinking of the sweet noises that'd leave your mouth or how he'd leave you breathless and tired or even how much of a cockdrunk girl he'd leave you, knowing he'd have you begging for more

miguel o'hara who now began to lock his office door to not have you accidentally stumble upon him stroking himself

he groaned and laid his head back against the couch as he stroked himself with both hands, precum dripping down his shaft, as he imagined it were your hands stroking his cock for him

he let out a handful of moans as he thrusted into his hands, feeling his orgasm approach just when he was getting an incoming call from his watch

he bite his lip and his eyes widen as he saw it was you. he hesitantly answered and gulped down a moan, "h-hey- what's up?" he breaths out, the grip on his cock being a bit tighter as he slowed down his pace not wanting you to hear

"hey I wanted to drop off a report but saw you have your door locked-"

"oh- uh yeah-" he says and bites his lips to hide a moan as he continued stroking himself, your voice helping him out a lot

"I- just leave it ou- outside the door for me please-" he said breathless and closes his eyes, feeling sweat beads form on his forehead

"alright sounds good! I'll catch ya later Miguelito." you say, oh so sweetly and hang up

he let out a loud groan and bucked his hips up, his cum shooting up to his stomach and legs. he sat there shaking his head, shocked he came just from hearing that nickname from you

miguel o'hara who was coming up with a plan with unexpected company to help him reveal his true feelings for you

"Hold on you want us to convince y/n that we're pranking you, but really it's a prank on her?" gwen repeats and he nods

"Alright say less." miles says and sets out a fake evil laugh

"You guys are gonna do this my way-"

"Yeah yeah just tell us what we need to do" gwen says and leans in as miguel quickly begins to explain his master plan

#across the spiderverse #miguel ohara imagine #miguel ohara #Miguel o’hara #Miguel ohara smut #Miguel o’hara smut

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netherworldpost · 3 months

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okay thems great grumblin' and all but it's time to get back to work

atty and Fang, via Daffy Duck and Bugs Bunny

I had a meeting with the bank yesterday to finalize all the paperwork to open the front office

I have a meeting with the printer next week (probably Thursday, possibly Friday) to review the first batch of our greeting cards.

I have a meeting with the tech crew who handle the computer bits because although I was a web designer for many years and even did some system admin work for a little while I've long given up that work because I'm Not Going to Keep Up with The Current Tech.

They want to split licenses between the back office for clients and the front office for the shop

Something something something Adobe something something something going to cost me money something something something I trust their reasons the tech crew have long proven to know what they are talking about

I am listing these points because I fondly remember the days of using licensed but out-of-current-version Adobe programs for YEARS because we are a closed-loop shop (i.e. our software was old but everyone used the same version so it didn't matter). Cough up $X-hundred dollars, gripe about it, use the same version of InDesign for, like, 7 years

Thank you all for this grumbling space.

Following launch, which is greeting card and printable download focused, I'm beginning to work on our zine projects.

Part of the zine project is a blog post "here is how we are doing our zine project, here are the costs. If you want to do a zine project, go for it!"

I'm also going to start working on the "Public Domain R&D" blog, where I talk about how to make things that we researched over the last 3 or 4 years but ended up not doing.

Like. Notebooks.

To say "you can make an entire company out of notebooks" is an understatement. I'll provide you the details and the notes from what I've found plus old notes from Evil Supply Co.'s notebooks.

We're not doing them because I'm incredibly tightly focused on greeting cards, zines, and downloads.

One of the first lines of the "Public Domain R&D" blog is going to be about picking what you want to do, can do, and will be comfortable doing, and sticking to that.

Evil Supply Co. was a giant experiment in "LETS DO EVERYTHING" and it was incredibly fun and rewarding and doing everything means you have to GET BIG as a company.

Physics forgives no one.

I'm rambling.

I've missed my several-times-a-day "I HAVE AN ZEPHYR OF A THOUGHT" and coming here to just say it.

Thank you for this space.

Back to work.

I'm making a giant batch of chili to feed the crew tomorrow.

I'm so grateful to do this work. It isn't all luck -- I've worked incredibly hard for an incredibly long period of time -- but that doesn't mean luck hasn't played a roll.

Okay.

Getting sappy.

Back to making chili then back to work.

Here is my intense rambling chili post.

Here is an opening guide to making zines. This will be expanded on this summer.

As (one of your) mythologists --

thank you.

For everything thus far.

I am so happy to been of service, and am glad to be of service going forward.

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azul1462 · 2 years

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I posted 1,934 times in 2021

242 posts created (13%)

1692 posts reblogged (87%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 7.0 posts.

I added 453 tags in 2021

#cookie run - 97 posts

#cookie run kingdom - 95 posts

#az rambles - 60 posts

#dark choco cookie - 48 posts

#headcanon talk - 33 posts

#shitpost - 28 posts

#miitopia - 26 posts

#dark cacao cookie - 23 posts

#bugsnax - 22 posts

#future reference - 21 posts

Longest Tag: 104 characters

#my parents would bug me about mentioning having kids when i'm an adult until i snapped at them about it.

My Top Posts in 2021

Some cookie run memes I made, and a joke art.

See the full post

298 notes • Posted 2021-10-06 19:01:38 GMT

Cookie Run headcanons part 3:

- Dark Choco's curse may be evil and causes murderous frenzies, but that curse has saved his ass from life or death situations several times.

- when together, the ancient cookies share a single braincell. Shenanigans quickly ensue.

- Licorice's eyes reflect light like a cat's eyes at night.

- the cookies of darkness (including Red Velvet and Strawberry Crepe) all see each other as adoptive siblings. Licorice, Red Velvet, and Dark Choco take turns babysitting Poison Mushroom and Strawberry Crepe. Pomegranate isn't trusted around kids.

- Dark Choco is definitely afraid of Pomegranate, tends to try and avoid her like the plague.

- Custard III heard the tales of Dark Choco, so when the rumors of him being in the kingdom turned out to be true Custard and his friends reacted with "HE'S REAL?!!?!?!"

- does Poison Mushroom ever blink? Yes but apparently not often. They seem to just always be staring into the distant void.

- Herb Cookie's "hair" is made out of leaves. When it all falls out around winter time it reveals his real hair underneath. Nowhere near long and elegant, just a bit of fuzzy hair.

300 notes • Posted 2021-10-18 15:03:01 GMT

Just started playing Sky: Children of the Light yesterday and this is how I chose to describe the Valley Elders.

340 notes • Posted 2021-07-23 19:16:46 GMT

Saw something on my Tumblr feed and had to draw it with these three.

Origin:

See the full post

395 notes • Posted 2021-12-13 05:56:08 GMT

More Cookie Run headcanons because yes:

- All the ancient cookies are freakishly strong. That means you could probably see Pure Vanilla Cookie lift up a boulder with ease so the younger cookies can look for bugs.

- When asked his age, Dark Choco Cookie simply says "I lost count." It brings a very slight smirk to his face hearing his fellow cookies of darkness argue over their speculations of his age. Who knows, it could be possible that he's thousands of years old, being the son of Dark Cacao Cookie, one of the ancient cookies.

- all the cookies (at least the ones that appear in kingdom's Story) need fucking therapy. Change my mind.

- Custard the III gets away with swearing around Chili Pepper Cookie, but once he's around the ancients everything changes. The reactions from the ancients range from "EXCUSE ME?!" to "Watch your language young man!" to "BITCH SHUT YOUR FUCKING MOUTH-"

- Dark Cacao Cookie is bad at forgiving, and really good at holding grudges. He can hold a grudge against someone for a very long time.

- Poison Mushroom Cookie makes squeaky toy noises, lots of squeaky toy noises.

1131 notes • Posted 2021-10-07 17:57:56 GMT

Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →

#my 2021 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review

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rollflasher · 3 years

Note

Tbh it feels weird whenever Ian says Sonic is shonen cuz Silver fits the shonen protagonist trope better. Sonic is more of an "American/Western" cool protagonist that goes against it a little.

See, what bugs me about this issue is how Flynn seems to think that the main defining trait of a shonen protagonist is Talk No Jutsu levels of compassion.

I'm talking purely out of my experience since I mostly watch old-school anime, but for me a shonen protagonist is a character who lives by their own word, has a youthful and energetic personality, is pretty passionate about what they do, strives for self improvement and most importantly, has a fiery fighting spirit and Sonic fits this criteria.

I made a post talking in detail about this, but Sonic has at least some level of the classic shonen hero (he clearly loves a challenge, Amy is in love with him in part because of his fighting spirit, Sonic has an incredible passion for running, he constantly improves his skills, has an energetic personality, shows signs of being a big eater courtesy of chili dogs, etc), you could say that Sonic has his own spin on the archetype but I think he definitely fits more there than with the american hero archetype, compare him to Spider-Man for example.

But I'm rambling here, my point is that apparently Flynn doesn't understand the shonen hero archetype or why protagonists who rely too much on Talk No Jutsu in modern shonen are getting so critisized, and he seems to disregard completely how this clashes with Sonic's character and how his character operates within the archetype.

#sonic the hedgehog #opinion

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elevatorsnot-worthy · 5 years

Text

Just A Little Chaotic (Chapter 4)

CHAPTER 4 - FLASHBACK, FORGET IT.

Description: Alison, a singer-songwriter and an actress, finds herself in a middle of a chaotic set up with two of her cast mates. One’s a new face and one’s an old friend.

Pairings: Chris Evans x OFC x Sebastian Stan

Just A Little Chaotic (All Chapters)

Author’s Note: There’s more of Sebastian in this chapter. ;)

2004. I’m in my second year of college and I was on the verge of breaking down. I was so stressed with college, and I was always reminded that I was not enough. The voice of my professor telling me that I will never reach anything kept replaying back on my head. I sat on the window sill as I watched the view of New York and its busy people. I was alone in my room, or that’s what I thought.

“Hey, wanna grab some food?” Sebastian swung my bedroom door open. He looked like he had a bad day. His hair was extremely messy, his shirt was a little wrinkled, and his face got and extra pout. Sebastian has been living with us for 8 months now and ever since he moved in, he and I became closer. Even though he was friend with my brother, initially.

“You okay?” I hugged my legs to my chest and Sebastian walked in. He was shaking his head as he sat beside me.

“I’m just tired,” He just facepalmed himself and sighed. “Anyway, it seems like you’re not in a good mood too. So, let’s go get some food.” Seb stood up and reached out to me.

“But I don’t wanna go out,” I said softly. Sebastian looked at me and took a deep breath. He placed his hands on my cheeks and kissed my forehead.

“Alright, I’ll buy some food and some beer,” he offered. “Then we’ll watch some Star Wars, sounds good?”

Halfway through the movie, both Seb and I were tipsy and full of Chinese food. I rested my head on the throw pillow that was propped on Sebastian’s lap. Watching movies in the living room has been a regular occurrence every time one of us had a bad day.

“You’re a good guy, Sebastian.” I randomly said to him. “Thanks for all of this.” I gestured to the empty bottles of beer filled the floor and Chinese take out boxes filled the coffee table in front of us.

“I just don’t want to see you sad, Ali.” Sebastian’s response threw me off. I don’t know if it was the alcohol or it was really my emotions. “Anything for you.” My heart skipped a beat at his voice. This can’t be, Sebastian’s my friend. Sebastian’s just my friend. I felt drawn to him all of a sudden and I sat up. Sebastian’s gaze was fixed to the TV, but his cheeks were red.

“Hey,” I whispered at him and he slowly turned to me. I can’t even recall how it started but I remembered how it felt. Sebastian’s lips found mine and he was on top of me. It felt wrong, but I can’t help it. What the fuck am I doing? My heart was melting with his kisses. Sebastian breathes heavily as he kisses me more. As soon as we heard the main door open, Sebastian leaped up and I quickly sat up.

“Everything alright?” It was my twin brother, Adam. It seems like he didn’t see me and Sebastian practically eating each other’s faces a few seconds ago.

“Yeah, we thought there was a bug.” I muttered my stupid excuse, but Adam looked like he believed it though. “We’ll never talk about that ever again.” I hissed at Sebastian.

“Don’t worry, it’s nothing.” He said with his hands up.

“Correct, it’s nothing.” I assured. To this day, Sebastian and I never mentioned that moment, but I know we both remember it.

I was on the way to the airport to kickstart my tour in San Francisco. It has been two and a half weeks since my date with Chris and I can’t wait for the next one. Chris called me earlier to say good luck, but he had to go since he was also on his way to shoot his new movie. I was about to take a nap but my phone rang again. It was Sebastian.

“Hey, why are you ignoring me?” Sebastian’s tone was filled with concern. Oh shit, I totally forgot to reply to him.

“Hey Seb, I’m sorry. I was busy. Right after Avengers, I went back straight to rehearsals.” I told him.

“It’s okay, Ali. I understand.” Sebastian sounded a little sad then he cleared his throat and continued to talk. “Anyway, I want to just say good luck and I am so proud of you. I bought tickets to your San Diego show, and I can’t wait to see you.” Sebastian’s voice was filled with enthusiasm. A wave of energy hits my body.

“Wait, what?” I muttered in disbelief. “But I thought you’re back in New York?”

“Yeah, I’ll fly to San Diego to see you.” He said matter-of-factly. “I was supposed to see you on your first show, but I had to go back in New York for work – come on Al, it’s like I haven’t done outrageous things for you.” I rolled my eyes in response.

“Alright, alright! We better get drinks right after, okay?” I said before I get to remember the shenanigans we did before.

“Of course! I gotta go now, I’m gonna be late. I’ll see you in a few days, Ali-bear!” He chimed.

“See you, Sebby-boy.” I said, and he ended the call. My brother, who was sitting beside me, turned to me with a face of disgust.

“You’re still using those disgusting nicknames?” he uttered sourly.

“It’s none of your business, Adam.” I rolled my eyes at him.

***

I sang the last note for the show and as soon the set finishes, I went backstage and received a lot of congratulatory cheers from my crew. After giving everyone thanks and hugs, I immediately went back to my dressing room. I changed to a new pair of clothes, a pair of ripped jeans and a vintage Star Wars t-shirt since Sebastian and I agreed that he’ll come to me after the show. I plopped down the leather couch, as I waited for Sebastian to come here. Joelle approached me and handed me my phone that was buzzing. It was Chris.

“Hey, you called right on time.” I smiled into the phone as I answered the call.

“I got lucky,” Chris chuckled. “How was the show?”

“It was great! I almost forgot my lyrics, but I had fun.” I joked, and he laughed in response. “How about you? How was your day?”

“I was really distracted earlier, I can’t get my lines right,” He said.

“I’m guessing you have a cute leading lady?” I teased at him and he giggled.

“No, no!” His laughter got louder. “I don’t know – nevermind, it’s embarrassing.” He said.

“Come on! Tell me, please!” I pleaded like a kid asking for candy from his mom.

“Fine, fine. I’ll tell you…” Chris voice was soft. He muttered some words that I was unable to understand. He took a deep breath and continued talking. “I kept imagining that she was you and you make me nervous so, I don’t know – it’s sounds so stupid so please act like I didn’t say anything. I sound ridiculous,” as I listened to Chris rambled on, a knock on the door distracted me. I walked towards the door and slowly opened it.

“Hey, Ali-bear.” Sebastian greeted me with a wide tooth grin. I stared blankly to Sebastian’s face then to the brown teddy bear in his arms. Chris’ voice faded as I stood frozen at the door. The teddy bear was as long as Sebastian’s torso and it has a small guitar hanging from its body.

“You probably hated what I said,” Chris’ voice snapped me back to reality.

“No, I don’t. It’s actually sweet and funny,” I said softly on the phone. Sebastian’s face faded and his eyebrows furrow. “Hey, I gotta go, I’ll call you back when I get back in the hotel.” I said, and I ended the call.

“Who was that?” Sebastian asked.

“It – it was Chris,” I didn’t know why but it felt hard to answer that simple question to Sebastian.

“Oh,” Sebastian stepped back and shook his head. “Anyway, I got this for you.” Sebastian handed me the teddy bear. My lips formed in to a bright smile as I held the teddy bear in my hands. I leaped into Sebastian’s arms and gave him a hug.

“Thank you so much, Seb!” He lifted me from the ground and held me tightly.

“You were amazing, Ali. I’m so proud of you.” He whispered in to my ear as he spun me around. Sebastian gently put me back to my feet and his wide grin was back. “So, let’s go get some drinks?” he offered.

“Yeah, let’s wait for Adam,” I said.

“Oh, no. Adam’s not coming. He has a date with Eloise.” He said.

“Okay, so I guess it’s just you and me then? Just like old times?” I smiled at him.

“Just like old times.” He nodded.

We went to the nearest bar we would find. We were seated on a booth in the corner of the bar and ordered beer, chili fries, and nachos. I listened to Sebastian as he told stories of the projects he did. It was the first time we saw each other since I started filming for Avengers. It was always a joy to see Sebastian talk about his work because it shows how passionate he is in everything he does.

“What about you? How was Avengers?” he asked me then took a piece of nachos.

“It was great, I had to do some fight scenes which was very new to me, but it was hella fun!” I beamed at him.

“Did you make friends?” Sebastian asked as he took a gulp from his beer.

“Yes, dad. I made friends,” I answered him sarcastically. I lit up as Chris’ face flashed in my brain. I automatically started talking about him. “Everyone was nice. Chris was really sweet—”

“Oh, Chris Evans? Is he the guy you were talking to earlier?” Sebastian teased. He smirked at me as he ate some fries.

“Yeah, we actually went on a date.” I answered, and Sebastian started coughing. “Are you okay?” Sebastian just nodded and chugged down his beer.

“I’m okay.” He said as he heaved for his breath. “You went on a date with him?”

“Yeah, Peter’s dating the girl he cheated on me with, so I think it’s just okay for me to date other people, right?” I shrugged and ate some fries.

“Yeah – no, no. You’re right, there’s nothing wrong with that.” He said softly.

“You worked with Chris, so you know that he’s a nice guy.” I told him as I watch his shoulders slowly fall.

“Yeah, he is.” Sebastian said bitterly and looked at his drink.

“Well it’s not like he’s my boyfriend already, we’re just seeing how things go since I’m still on tour.” I said, and Sebastian did not respond. “Are you okay, Seb?”

Sebastian cleared his throat and said, “Yeah, I’m okay. I just remembered that you probably have an early morning tomorrow. I probably have to bring you back to the hotel.” His voice was monotone. I didn’t understand his sudden change of mood. I used to talk to him about the guys I dated before, and he would listen. This time his reaction was different, he used to make fun of the guys I dated. Sebastian offered to walk me back to the car that was waiting outside, and I said yes, ending the night immediately. After I paid for the bill, Sebastian walked behind me. I can feel the immediate drop in him, but I can understand why.

Sebastian’s POV

I felt like a dumbass as I walked behind Alison. Why does it have to be Chris? I flew all the way from New York to San Diego just to see her. I wanted to hate at her, but I can’t. It’s Alison. My heart is too weak to even feel the slightest annoyance towards her. When we reached her car, I opened the door for her. I watched her as she climbed in. Her long brown curly hair bounced with every move she made. She looked at me with a slight frown on her face.

“Do you want a ride?” she asked me. Her brown eyes made my heart soft. It always did.

“No, I’m staying at a different hotel, it’s out of your way.” I lied.

“Okay. Take care, Seb.” She said softly.

“Take care, Alison.” I said and then I closed the car door. I watch as the car drove away from me.

I never thought I would be falling for her. She’s my best friend’s sister, for God’s sake. I tried to fight it for years, but I can never forget how my whole world stopped the moment I first laid eyes on her. Even though I dated other girls, I always find myself at her feet. I went back to the bar and ordered something stronger. Even though she said Chris was not her boyfriend, I saw how much her eyes lit up when she mentioned his name. She was like that when she was with Peter, before everything they had went to shit.

“Hey, you alright?” a blonde woman sat beside me. “You’ve been staring at your drink for a while now.”

I shook my head and responded to her, “I flew all the way from New York to tell this girl that I like her for a long time.” My words just came out due to the alcohol getting the best of me.

“I’ll guess, she already has a boyfriend?” she asked. I shook my head still not looking at the woman beside me.

“She’s talking to this guy, and I know by the end of the year he’ll be her boyfriend.” I said and took a shot of my drink. I just realized that I’ve done 6 shots. My God.

“Aren’t you going to convince her?” she asked.

“Nope, I promised myself to never get in the way.” I said. I gave her some space after her breakup with Peter. I also did not want to take advantage of her vulnerability. “You know what, forget about it. I think we’re just better off as friends.” I muttered but I never meant a single word I said. I faced the woman beside me and introduced myself. “I’m Sebastian,” I reached out my hand to her.

“Heather,” she said as she shook my hand softly. She leaned into my ear and whispered, “Come on, I’ll show you a good time.”

Tag list: @everything-is-awesomesauce @supernatural-girl97

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ravenwolfie97 · 5 years

Text

hey, can i ramble about how awesome pkmn black/white is? cool

specifically i wanna talk about the gym leaders, because they’re one of my favorite details in the games. for the first few generations, gym leaders were just a means to an end, people designed to fight you with specific types of pokemon. they existed entirely to be gym leaders and nothing else. yeah they had design quirks that gave them a vague sense of a life and personality besides gym leading, but they were never actually expanded upon. gens 1 and 4 were good examples of gym leaders with backstory. however, they just never. Did anything with them beyond gym leading, save for a couple short cutscene bits or literally having to track them down to fight them

now gen 5 REALLY amped up gym leaders and the elite four as well, and i love it. each of them is extremely involved in their jobs and hobbies outside of their gym leader status, and they’re reflected in their gym locations. i’m gonna bulletpoint this list of people because it’s an easy-to-digest format

1. Cilan, Chili, and Cress: Grass/Fire/Water leaders from Striaton City They’re restaurant owners and chefs! Their gym is literally within their restaurant, and their waiters challenge you along the way, so it’s dinner and a show! (also all of their names are based on herbs/spices)

2. Lenora: Normal leader from Nacrene City She’s an archaeologist and the curator of the city’s museum along with her husband Hawes. Yeah, this woman’s married! Don’t think that’s been an explicit thing before! She’s also super well-read, with a huge library in the back of the museum, and her gym is hidden underneath the shelves! That’s wild.

3. Burgh: Bug leader from Castelia City He’s an artist and possibly a fashion designer as well! His first gym was an art gallery with honey walls, but his updated gym from BW2 was filled with bug-spun silk and his final floor was flooded with rainbow paint. I don’t know if he’s actually into fashion as well, but I remember he was in a Nuzlocke comic I read, and I could see that fitting for him as well with all the silk.

4. Elesa: Electric leader from Nimbasa City She’s a flippin’ supermodel! Originally her gym was at the end of the rollercoaster ride in Nimbasa’s amusement park, but in BW2 it was changed to a runway with other models challenging you as you advance.

5. Clay: Ground leader from Driftveil City He’s the operator of a mining business! It’s interesting that mining is the main export of a port city, but hey, there’s two caves nearby and his gym is literally a massive crystal-filled mine. He’s super responsible with all that to take care of!

6. Skyla: Flying leader from Mistralton City She’s a cargo plane pilot! Her gym is beside an airport runway and within a mail carrier building. She even flies the player around to certain areas, so she’s still capable of piloting planes as well as battling trainers!

7. Brycen: Ice leader from Icirrus City It’s unclear what he does in BW (he’s like vaguely a ninja/monk?), but in BW2, turns out he’s an actor! You can’t battle him in BW2 but you can find him in PokeStar Studios in his own movies! Just looked it up - he had originally been an actor and then got himself hurt in a stunt gone wrong, so he retired and went to train himself to be more mindful and knowledgeable. Then he went back to acting later on. That’s some good backstory right there.

8. Drayden/Iris: Dragon leaders from Opelucid City I wasn’t actually sure what they did either, but Drayden is the mayor of Opelucid City and Iris is just a very excited Dragon-type trainer from the Village of Dragons. Drayden had to stay in Opelucid as its mayor, while Iris trained hard and became Champion once Alder retired. Both of them had very different goals in their strength!

BUT WAIT, THERE’S MORE

9. Cheren: Normal leader from Aspertia City After the events of BW, Cheren becomes a teacher at the Pokemon School in Aspertia, and continues battling as a way to teach the kiddies! It’s a really great position for him to have taken since it aligns with both of his passions: learning about and battling with Pokemon.

10. Roxie: Poison leader from Virbank City She’s the bass guitarist and singer of her very own rock band! Her gym is within a dark and graffitied music club, and her band plays their music on the stage!

11. Marlon: Water leader from Humilau City Honestly not sure what he does, he just seems like a surfer dude who really likes swimming and being in the water n stuff. Maybe he helps out with the Marine Tube? I dunno, that seems plausible.

BUT WAIT, THERE’S STILL THE ELITE FOUR

12. Shauntal: Ghost-type user She’s a novelist! She even has a pen and notebook in her hands as she battles you, and she shares little snippets from her stories every time you challenge her. That’s so cute!

13. Grimsley: Dark-type user He’s a gambler, and really good at it, too - very fitting for a Dark-type trainer. However, he’s got more backstory than I remembered (from Bulbapedia): “He is the son of a distinguished family that fell into ruin. As a result, he developed a gambling addiction.” He eventually went to Alola and got good at Mantine Surfing but that’s not as important. He’s still good at games.

14. Caitlyn: Psychic-type user She seems narcoleptic... Like, her room is literally a giant canopy bed and she’s basically in her pajamas when she fights you. She’s like if Musharna were in human form: constantly sleepy but fueled by their psychic power. Oh! She used to be an assistant in the Battle Frontier Castle in Sinnoh! Forgot about that important bit! And she apparently is actually psychic but is kinda like Mob from MP100 where it gets out of control if she gets too emotional. Neat!

15. Marshal: Fighting-type user He was an apprentice to Alder, and is a very disciplined fighter. His Elite Four room is a big boxing ring and he wears a mouth guard and wears an outfit reminiscent of a gi, so he seems like he could be a boxer or an MMA fighter.

hhhhhhh okay i’m done now

wait, not yet. the coolest thing about all of these guys is that pretty much all of them are involved in the story outside of gym stuff, they all know each other, and at the end of BW they come together to help apprehend Ghetsis

OH AND NOT TO MENTION in BW2 all of the gyms get their own custom remixes! those all further amplify the gym leaders’ aesthetics and sidenote i so wish that’d come back it was srsly super cool

what i’m trying to say is gen 5 was fantastic and did a lot for gym leaders that hasn’t been replicated since. even for alola, that’s kind of debatable; their backstories and trial placements were greatly expanded upon in the same way, but the level of overall involvement in the story was still greatly reduced

tl;dr: BW/2 were great games and i love them ok bye

#pokemon #pokemon black and white #pokemon bw #text thing #yeah

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dickie-gayson · 7 years

Text

Shenanigans

Chapter Two: Jason's No Good, Very Bad Day

Jason's No Good, Very Bad Day

To say Jason was having a bad day was an understatement. He was having the worst day ever, and that's counting the infamous 'totally died once' day. First, he woke up because a fucking parade was going down the street. Why was there even a parade? On top of that, he caught one hell of a bug. His nose was all clogged, his throat hurt, his fucking eyeballs throbbed because of the migraine he had, and he was so nauseous that just the thought of smelling food made him want to throw up. So, he decided to take some medicine because like fuck he was going to suffer through this. Turns out, he was out of cold and flu medicine, which sucked but that was only the third shitty thing in the whole list of shitty things to follow.

Naturally, he called one of his many siblings and bitched at them to get him medicine. Dick laughed at him and imitated his sick voice, which was way off the mark. Dick sounded like some sort of asthmatic goose which Jason totally didn't sound like, thank you very little Dickface. So, Jason hung up on Dick. Tim fell asleep halfway through the call then told him to fuck off after Jason all but wailed through the phone. Then, Tim hung up on Jason. Next, was Steph. Surely she'd take pity on his poor, innocent soul. Turns out, no, she wouldn't. She was still holding a grudge against him after he stole her ice cream from the freezer two weeks ago. They hung up on each other.

At this point, his throat was so sore, he felt like crying just a little (a lot). He didn't even bother to try Damian. That little demon would probably gloat about his superior immune system or some shit. He decided to try Cass next, because at least she had to love him just a little and care enough about her sickly brother. Also, he was still pretty sure Duke was scared of him. The phone only rang once before Cass's soft voice greeted his ear. Even that sounded too loud to his pounding head.

"Jason."

If it weren't for caller id, Jason would be creeped out by the knowing way she answered his call.

"Medicine."

That was all he rasped out because he was feeling way too sore to speak anymore. Also, he knew he didn't need to ramble on to convince her to help. She was awesome like that. He considered her the best sibling. The others were jerks.

"Magic word?"

He whined, which definitely didn't sound super pathetic. Was it just him or did it sound like she just laughed at his pain? No, Cass was the nice one. A highly lethal, former assassin, but nice.

"Cass..."

At the following silence, he all but cried. For the love of God he was dying here. Still, she didn't answer. He would have thought she hung up on him, but that wasn't her style. Also, he could still hear her laughing at him. So much for being the nice one. Jason sighed, then winced at the pain that followed.

"...Please?"

It was quiet for another beat before Cass responded.

"Ten minutes."

That was it before she hung up. He dropped his phone and prepared himself for ten whole minutes of suffering. This was just unfair. He's nice. He's funny. He's devilishly handsome. He helped little old ladies across the street. Why was he the one to get sick? Why couldn't Tim get sick? He was so unhealthy! And mean. That little shit was way craftier and evil than the others realized. He should have this cold. Maybe Jason would go over and cough all over his stuff. The thought of moving made him want to vomit just a little, so he decided he'd just stay here. Also, he was pretty sure Tim had a weakened immune system and it'd be pretty shitty of Jason to do that. See? Nice.

He must have fallen asleep, because the next thing he knows, he's being shaken awake by Cass in full Black Bat regalia. He'd deny any and all claims that he screamed in fear at waking up to see that creepy mask right in his face. Tears pricked his eyes as his throat burned something fierce from the abuse. She handed him a steaming cup. He winced as he sat up and looked at the drink then at Cass in question. Thank whoever taught her how to read body language so well because he really didn't want to ask what the fuck it was.

"Theraflu."

He wanted to groan. Of all the medicines for her to bring. Theraflu was gross. At least they came out with better flavors. He carefully took the hot cup and tentatively sipped the drink. Immediately he gagged. It was original flavor. Cass must not have tastebuds, he decided. Medicine was never good when it was original flavor and Theraflu was the worst offender. Cass made a motion for him to keep going and he took a breath, ready to chug the disgusting liquid. It was a miracle he didn't vomit all over the place once he finished.

She gave him a pat on his shoulder as a sort of congratulations before taking the cup and setting it on the nightstand. Then, she pointed to his dresser, where a different bottle of medicine sat. He stared at it for a moment before looking at her with betrayal on his face. Her shoulders shook and she let out a breathy laugh. She made him drink that nasty shit when there was medicine right there. That means she knew Original Theraflu tasted like sweaty ten-week old gym socks.

"Why Cass?"

His voice still sounded really pathetic and scratchy.

"Ice cream."

He groaned and fell back against his pillow at that. Naturally, this was for something he did to Steph. Those two were damn near inseperable.

"I've never felt so betrayed in my life."

She just gave him another pat and made her exit as he bemoaned the horrible taste still tainting his mouth. That was number whatever of the unending horrors of the day, and it was only noon.

He drifted in and out of sleep for a few hours. Once the Theraflu started to fade and the pain started to return, he decided to crawl his way to his dresser for some better tasting medicine. Actually, he was going to walk, but his foot got tangled in his sheet and he face planted. For a solid minute, he contemplated on the merits of just passing out on the floor and never getting up again. Eventually, he figured two whole feet wasn't too far. While this tasted bad, it wasn't Original Theraflu bad, and he didn't need a whole cup full to feel better.

After he took it, he decided to say 'fuck it' and lay back on the floor. It was cooler than his bed and, quite frankly, he didn't want to walk all two feet back. He fell back asleep with one fever-hot cheek pressed to the cold wood flooring as he waited for the medicine to work its magic. Yet again, he was rudely awoken by a sibling. This time, however, it was Dick waking him up. And it wasn't from a shake. No, this motherfucker had to trip over Jason's sprawled out legs and fall directly on top of his prone form, illiciting cries of surprise from the both. Naturally, he'd be agile and all but impossible to trip in every situation but this.

Jason curled up on his side with a pained sound and squinted angrily at Dick.

"The fuck you want, Dickhead?"

Dick got back to his feet and stared at Jason with slight worry.

"I came to bring you medicine even though you oh so rudely hung up on me. Why are you on the floor?"

Jason just glared for another moment before deeming the action too taxing and closed his eyes again.

"Colder down here. Bed too far."

If he was looking, he'd notice Dick rolling his eyes at Jason's melodramatics.

"You are such a baby."

Instead of verbally responding, he weakly flipped the older man off. Dick sounded like he was laughing at Jason, which was totally rude and uncalled for. Why was everyone laughing at him today? Jason flailed a little at the sudden feeling of arms under his neck and knees as he was lifted, causing Dick to grunt in an effort not to drop him.

"Jesus christ, stop it. You're heavy enough as it is. How many chili dogs have you been eating?"

Jason huffed as he, once again, glared at his older brother who seemed to be carrying him to his bed.

"Shut up, gilipollas."

At the insult, Dick let out an offended noise before dropping Jason onto his bed. Yet again, he'd deny any accusations at the shriek of surprise he let out at the sudden descent. And yet again, Dick was laughing at him. What did he do to deserve such a cruel older brother? Life was unfair. Jason grabbed his blanket and rolled until he was totally cocooned in it. It was blessedly quiet and dark for a moment before Dick pulled the blanket from over his head and stared at him.

"Whatcha doing, Jay?"

Jason wiggled in an effort to punch Dick for interrupting his rest, only to be reminded he just wrapped himself up like an oversized burrito, effectively trapping his arms. Instead, Jason turned again to bury his face in his pillows.

"Hiding."

Dick snorted as he hopped onto the bed. The jarring movements caused Jason's stomach to roll again. He let out a disgruntled sound. Bright blue eyes appeared inches from his and a shit-eating grin was plastered across Dick's face. Jason wondered how Dick would like it if he projectile vomited right in that dumb smiley face of his. That'd teach him to jump on his bed and be annoying.

"Whatcha hiding from?"

This asshole was having way too much fun with Jason's misery.

"You."

He burrowed his way further into his cocoon in an effort to escape his teasing older brother. It appeared his efforts were in vain because Dick just decided to start poking him over and over like the nuisance he was.

"Why are you hiding from me?"

Jason grumbled again before speaking up, though his voice was muffled by the blanket.

"You're mean. And ugly. Ugly and mean."

There was an over the top gasp at the words and Jason could just envision Dick putting an affronted hand to his heart. Then, just because he could, he envisioned himself punching Dick in the face a few times. That cheered him up a little.

"Ouch, Little Wing. Three Hottest Man of the Year awards say otherwise."

The sing-song way Dick said it was way too happy and smug for his tastes. He'd just have to take him down a few pegs then.

"They're liars, you're ugly. And still mean."

He pretended his voice wasn't nasally and gross sounding. Also, did his nose just whistle? Ugh.

"Well, that's just hurtful."

"Your face is hurtful!"

Alright, not his best comeback, he'd admit it, but he's sick. Dick just laughed loudly, causing Jason to wince as his head throbbed.

"Wow, you're hilarious when you get sick. Hold on, I need to record this."

"Go. Away."

"And miss this prime opportunity to stock up on blackmail? Hell no."

"I. Am. Going. To. Kill. You."

"You gotta deal with Dami first."

"Asshole."

The bed shifted as Dick got up and all was quiet again. Jason sighed in contentment. Then, his fortress was disturbed by his brother again. Jason was very tempted to bite his fingers but he didn't know where they've been and he didn't need to get even sicker. He felt a cool hand on his cheek then his forehead. He grumbled as Dick turned him to look into his eyes.

"Oh, shut up Jay. I'm just checking to make sure you're fine."

"I'm not fine. I'm dying. Again. This is it, Dickie. This is the end. Tell Steph I'm not sorry about the ice cream. It was delicious and I'm glad she didn't get any."

Dick rolled his eyes at his words. Jason was notoriously dramatic when he got sick. Okay, so maybe he was notoriously dramatic all the time, but he was even worse when he was sick.

"Relax, you've just got the flu."

As if he didn't believe Dick, Jason shook his head adamantly.

"No, no. I'm definitely dying again."

"It'll pass in about a day or two."

Dick looked around and spotted the open medicine on the dresser. Looks like he got here after someone else. He was betting it was Cass. She was the nice one. His attention was drawn back to the younger man as he heaved a grand sigh.

"This is the death of Jason Todd, the Remix. I'm biting the big one again. Going to that ol' Batcave in the sky. Pushing daises. Going to sleep with the fishes. Getting a six foot bed, which is ridiculous cus I'm six-one."

It seemed they were studiously ignoring one another at this point as they both continued on.

"With that medicine you took, you should feel pretty fine in about ten minutes or so."

"I want to leave all my belongings to Cass. No, wait, she made me drink original Theraflu. She gets nothing. Give it all to Alfie. He'll appreciate my rifle collection."

The older vigilante couldn't help but snort at Jason. Though, he could sympathize with the Theraflu original kind was easily the worst.

"Seriously, it's not that bad. Dami just got over the flu."

"Let Bruce bury me, so he can let me down one...last...time."

At that, Dick couldn't help but let out a loud laugh. He made his way to the window, ready to leave Jason wallow.

"Alright, yep I'm just gonna let you stew in your theatrics. See ya, Jay."

"Fare-thee-well, Dicklick. Parting would be such sweet sorrow, but you're an asshole. Tis time for me to depart from this mortal coil and return to the dust from which all came."

"God, you are such a nerd."

Jason peeked out of his shelter as Dick left through his bedroom window. And the asshole left it open, of course. How inconsiderate. He got a few more blessed hours of peace before yet another sibling crawled through his window. Jason whined as he was woken up.

"Why can't you people let me die in peace?"

"So Dick wasn't exaggerating, you really are a big baby when you're sick."

Tim stared down at him, totally unimpressed, dressed in his Red Robin gear, and sipping a latte like the rich boy he was. If Jason hadn't trapped his own arms, he would slap that drink right out of Tim's hands. Bloodshot teal eyes glared with all the hatred he could muster.

"Don't you have a kryptonian to be fucking?"

The younger boy only rolled his eyes before sipping obnoxiously on his drink.

"Haven't heard that one before. B said to get your lazy ass up. Arkham breakout."

Jason huffed and definitely didn't pout. He frowned intensely, that's it.

"Tell B he can go fall off a cliff. I'm not moving."

Tim, once more, gave Jason that condescending, unimpressed look. Once Jason rolled himself out of this blanket burrito, he was going to kick that latte-drinking loser's nonexistant ass.

"Oh please, you got the light work. You're on Riddler duty."

At that, Jason gave an offended gasp. Riddler duty? That's...that's almost as bad as Humpty Dumpty duty. Sure, Riddler set up a whole matter of deadly riddle-based traps and tests and had goons to fight, but beyond that he was a snap to beat up. So long as he hasn't rigged like...a children's hospital to blow or something, he should be fairly easy to wrangle in.

"I can't believe I got Riddler duty. This is unfair."

"That's rich coming from the nerd who actually likes doing homework and reading Earnest Hemmingway."

He cursed himself once more for restraining his arms, because he would simultaneously punch Tim and cover his mouth in horror. First, everyone laughs at him. Now, everyone is calling him a nerd. Tim called him a nerd. This must be a fever dream.

"Earnest Hemmingway is a literary treasure, you uncultured swine."

"Whatever. Just get ready or I'm telling Kate who prank called her last month."

Low blow. Jason only vaguely remembered doing that. To say he had been a few drinks deep would be a lie. He had gotten fucking plastered. How everyone thought Damian was the mean one, Jason would never know. Tim was fucking ruthless. Jason would have to remember to recruit him for the annual snowball fight in the Watchtower. And by annual snowball fight, he totally means when he and Dick manage to confiscate Freeze's gun again and aim to embarrass Bruce in front of the other heroes.

"You promised not to! I was drunk, you dick."

"And? I need to go deal with Pyg. PYG I swear to god, if I have to hear him squealing and singing opera one more time I'm going to throw him into a trash compactor."

Okay, that would be fucking hilarious. Jason would totally pay to see Tim do that to the annoying villain. He'd have to thank Bruce for sending Tim after Pyg and not himself, because Jason would probably actually kill him. Then, he decided Bruce was still the supreme cockbite of the hero community and would, instead, thank Babs. He would not be able to handle any of Pyg while he's sick without it ending in murder.

"Fiiiine. I'm getting ready Tiny Tim. Have fun with the Professor."

He heard a faint 'eat a dick' as Tim leapt out of the window. Jason just stared at the ceiling for a few moments before slowly unraveling himself. He seriously hated everyone and everything today. With a long, drawn out groan, he made his way to his dresser to take more medicine. Then, he shambled like the undead corpse he really was to the secret compartment in his wall to retrieve his gear.

Getting all his gear on was more of a hassle when everything ached than he would originally expect it to be. Still, he got it done. As he stuck his domino on with spirit gum, he heard yet another person crawl through his window. He let out an aggravated groan as he turned to glare at the intruder.

"Why can't any of you assholes...use...the door...What the fuck."

Staring at him in shock and fear was none other than the Riddler himself with a sack over his shoulder. It was a decidely awkward staredown neither would forget any time soon. Leave it to the fucking Riddler to accidently climb through Red Hood's bedroom window. In the blink of an eye, they both moved. Jason had his gun trained on the green-clad criminal, right between the eyes. Riddler had a gun of his own pointed at Hood. It was a draw, literally. The vigilante narrowed his eyes in irritation. Really, how much shittier can his day get? Now he'd have to find another place to live because of this puce-colored dickhead.

"I am going to kick your ass so hard your new color scheme is going to be black and blue. Then Nightwing's going to kick your ass for taking his color scheme."

Riddler gulped at the threat but didn't lower his gun. It appeared as if he were shaking. Jason would like to think it was from fear, but he was pretty sure it was from repressing his laughter at Jason's voice. His glare intensified, not that Nygma could see it behind the white-out lenses.

"Then I'm going to kick your ass again. And then I'm going to take your stupid, lanky, noodle body, shove it into a suitcase, shove that suitcase into a car trunk. THEN I'm going to send that car off a cliff."

That got the Riddler to shudder slightly as Red Hood wasn't known for making idle threats, no matter how absurd the threat was. Or how hilariously similar to an asthmatic goose his voice sounded. Still, the Riddler was notorious for having the last word. His pride simply couldn't stand for this. Also, he couldn't keep the laughter bubbling in his throat down any longer. Really, Red Hood sounded hilarious. If he sounded like this all the time, nobody would take him seriously. Jason just mentally groaned. Even the Riddler was laughing at him today. 'Oh, how the mighty have fallen. I'll never recover from this. Ever. Please, death, just take me already.'

"How frightening indeed. I wonder, would you-"

He was cut off from his soon-to-be diatribe by Red Hood's low, almost wheezing voice.

"In a trunk. Off a cliff."

The vigilante certainly was adamant about that bit, it seemed. He also appeared to be pretty sick, which should make this easier. Then again, Riddler also should be able to take on a nine year old in a fight and win, and yet that was proven wrong time and time again, sadly.

"Yes, well, riddle me thi-'

"IN A TRUNK. OFF A CLIFF."

Riddler jumped at the sudden enraged yell as the hulking hero took a threatening step toward him. It was then and there that Riddler re-evaluated his plan.

"There's a bomb in here, bye!"

The villain tossed the bag he was once carrying at the sick man and made his timely escape out the window. Jason caught the bag with flailing hands in an effort to keep the bomb stable. Carefully, he opened the sack and peered at the contents. Well, it is a bomb. A fucking bath bomb. Jason threw the bag in irritation before he ran after the frightened villain. He made it down the fire escape in record time. Then, the vigilante caught site of Riddler shoving someone off their bike and riding away.

"I AM GOING TO KICK YOUR LEPRECHAUN LOOKING ASS, NYGMA!'

There was a high shriek as the man looked behind him to see a rather pissed off Red Hood running after him with impressive speed. He peddled all the harder to get away from the unholy ass kicking waiting for him. He was panting sooner than he'd like to admit.

"Why did I join chess club in high school? I should have went for track."

Though he whined to himself, it seemed Red Hood's gear allowed him to hear what he was saying as just shortly after he heard the man yelling at him in response.

"NERD!"

"HEY! CHESS CLUB IS A RESPECTABLE EXTRACURRICULAR ACTIVITY!"

Even though Riddler was moderately fearing for his life at the moment, he was also feeling rather indignant about that comment. That uncouth meathead wouldn't know respectability if it bit him in his toned ass. Not that, uh, not that Riddler noticed that his ass was toned or anything. That's just absurd. There was no response to his comment, making the villain turn to look behind him. No one. It seemed he lost his tail. He let out a sigh of relief as he slowed his furious pedaling. Finally, he could catch his breath. Naturally, his luck ran out as just a few moments later, that familiar screaming picked up again.

"BOOK CLUB'S COOLER!"

He turned and did a double take. Red Hood apparently hijacked someone's moped and was now speeding after him. Riddler let out an undignified screech as he resumed his previous pace. Of course, he couldn't let the book club comment go without a retort.

"BOOK CLUB IS FOR THOSE TOO MORONIC TO FORM THEIR OWN OPINION ON MEDIOCRE LITERATURE."

"SAY THAT TO MY FACE, YOU STRING BEAN LOOKING MOTHERFUCKER."

That is something Riddler would never do unless Red Hood was safely tied up in at least twenty chains, put in an unbreakable cage, and completely paralyzed. The crook was arrogant, not insane. Well, some would disagree, but whatever. They don't know what they're talking about.

"FUCK."

At that, he chanced a glance behind him and noticed Red Hood slowing down. It seemed the moped was out of gas. What luck! He let out a victorious cackle as he peddled his way to victory. It was, however, a short lived victory.

"I'M COMING FOR YOU, BITCHWARD."

Riddler was ready to cry. Of course, he got stuck with the violently murderous and notoriously stubborn Bat. Wait, that described at least half of the Bats. Okay, the Bat that actually murdered people. That should narrow the list down a bit. When he turned around, however, he almost fell off of the stolen bike laughing. The big bad Red Hood was chasing after him on a segway. He was leaning dangerously forward in an effort to go faster. This had to be the slowest high speed chase in history. Riddler had to stare straight ahead to keep from losing it. He looked so ridiculously determined and pissed off on that segway. It was such a hilarious contrast, one could mistake it for a Monty Python skit.

"OH, YOU'VE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME."

It appeared the segway had died on the hero as well, causing Riddler to laugh even harder and almost fall off yet again. If he kept this up, he'd get caught just from the ridiculousness of this all.

Meanwhile, the civilians, who should be panicking at the site of the two, were, instead, laughing quite loudly. It was very upsetting, actually. Everyone really was laughing at Jason today. This wasn't fair. He threw the piece of shit segway down. Who even rode those anymore? He would have just grappled his way to the rooftop and cut Riddler off down the road but it turns out he forgot his grapple gun at home. And the spare. Figures. Someone upstairs sure hated him today.

He looked around frantically to find something to ride to catch up to the escaping villain. Jason couldn't run the whole way, not feeling the way he did today. Sure, the medicine helped, but he still felt like utter shit and if kept trying to keep pace with the bicycle, he'd hack up a lung from coughing. No vehicles lined the street because they had been moved due to the parade earlier. Great. Nobody kept their bikes outside anymore because they'd get stolen. Hell, he didn't even see a scooter. Then, his eyes landed on something and he let out a long, pained groan. Why? Why him? Why couldn't the sweet embrace of death just choke him out already? Resigned to his fate of being the laughing stock forever, he made his way to the only option left. He had a Lucky Charms imposter to catch and beat the shit out of.

The sound of citizens laughing drew the attention of Dick and Damian, who had been nearby and were worried it was Joker toxin. Turns out, no, it wasn't that. It was Jason being ridiculous. Dick almost fell off the roof laughing as he watched his brother chase the Riddler on every ridiculous vehicle he could get his hands on. He looked over to see Damian recording the event with a growing almost evil grin on his lips. Oh, this was so getting sent to everyone. What really made Dick lose it, however, was when Jason peddled after the villain on a kid's tricycle. Tassles and all. Dick had to sit down as he laughed. Even Dami's rockhard resolve was crumbling as he giggled lightly to himself. Jason would definitely never live this down.

Jason got the sensation that one of his siblings was making fun of him right now. He prayed none of them were seeing this, as he would never get to live it down. Still, he had to catch this asshole one way or another. There was no way in hell Jason was letting him walk, especially after he walked into Jason's apartment AND made him ride a motherfucking segway while he was sick. His bad boy image would never recover. His life was effectively over. Again.

The kid's tricycle he was on (and he felt slightly bad for the kid he took it from) shook dangerously beneath him as he picked up speed going downhill. He was closing in on the Riddler and he grinned menacingly. Okay, so he probably looked just a tad unhinged right now, but can anyone really blame him? Then, he heard a heartstopping popping sound and the tricycle literally fell apart underneath him, sending him tumbling across the asphalt. He lay amidst the scraped pink wreckage and just stared at the dark sky in defeat.

He only looked at his escaping target when Riddler started to laugh loudly only to get cut off by a 'BANG'. It seemed he was laughing so hard, he ran into a sign and knocked himself out. Fantastic. Even worse, Nightwing and Robin swooped in to handcuff the unconscious villain and give him a thumbs up, followed by Dick talking to him loudly.

"Don't worry Hood, we got him!"

Jason just sighed and stared at the sky again, refusing to move. Moments later, the figures of his two brothers stood over him. They were staring judgementally, making fun of him, he just knew it.

"Get up, Hood."

Damian was polite as ever. Still, Jason didn't move. Instead, he looked at the younger hero.

"Do me a favor, get the Batmobile."

If Jason had to take a guess, he'd say Dami just rolled his eyes at him, though it felt as if both brothers were now looking him over critically.

"Your fall, while disgraceful, did not seem too catastrophic. Are you injured?"

"No."

Robin let out an impatient noise as he looked at the growing crowd then back to his 'brother'.

"Then why do you need the Batmobile?"

Jason looked at him with a deathly serious expression.

"I want you to run me over with it."

Damian and Dick were both silent for a moment as they stared at Jason. Then, Damian gave the smallest of smirks as he responsed.

"...Gladly."

Dick whipped his head toward Damian at the affirmation.

"Robin, no! Red Hood, get up. Riddler and the other Rogues are dealt with. You can head home."

Instead of rising, as Dick instructed, Jason gave a mournful sort of shake of the head.

"Can't."

At this point, Dick was ready to just drag his dramatic ass home and toss him in his bed. They really needed to split before the police got here, but Hood didn't seem to want to move any time soon.

"And why is that?"

"Riddler knows where my apartment is."

That caught the eldest hero by surprise.

"Wait, how?"

"He climbed into my bedroom window because SOMEBODY left it open, Dickhead."

Despite the accusatory glare being sent his way, Dick laughed.

"Seriously? That's fucking hilarious."

"Shut up. He threw a bath bomb at me."

The mental image alone had him laughing again. What a jerk.

"Hey, at least it wasn't a real bomb, right?"

Any rebuttal was cut off as an explosion coming from the direction of Jason's apartment shook the ground. All three vigilantes looked toward the steadily rising smoke.

"Holy shit, it was a real bomb."

Jason just closed his eyes and gave up. The sky flashed with lightning and thundercrashed. Within the next moment, rain poured down on the forlorn hero.

"Fuck my second life."

#Shenanigans #my writing #Jason Todd #the batkids

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