This singular frame was all it took to undo my very extreme hatred of Adam, Vivienne Medrano how dare you make me feel sympathy for this man-

Like, Adam before this scene? A blatant misogynist and a hypocrite who unabashedly revels in sinners' suffering. A guy who has no regard for anyone else, and who pisses pretty much every viewer off with patronizing jabs like "sorry sweetie" and "try to chillax, babe." Ugh, disgusting.

As the first man, it seems like he got an easy pass into Heaven. Maybe the angels were just saving face, given that their core pair of humans both took the fruit of knowledge of good and evil willingly, ordaining Adam on the technicality that "Eve did it first." But I think we can all agree that it was not on the merit of Adam's virtue.

And then Charlie draws blood during their fight in Episode 8, and, for the first time, Adam genuinely realizes he can be hurt. Like, for the first time in the duration of the show, in his entire fucking existence, someone shows him that he is not, in fact, an all-powerful symbol of power and superiority. He's just a guy with privilege who is just as vulnerable, just as flawed, just as human as the rest of them.

But once the mask is shattered, revealing the rather unexceptional man underneath, does Adam back down? Of course not—he doubles down. There's nothing worse than a narcissist who is virtually incapable of seeing the error of their ways, even when they're clearly backed into a corner. Bruised and bloody, he bellows that he's THE man; everybody should worship him.

For me, that pretty much hit the nail in the coffin. There was no redeeming a character like Adam (ironic, since he's one of the few characters in the show not in need of redemption).

So isn't it fitting, then, that his death didn't happen in some grand display requiring all of Lucifer or Charlie's might? Isn't it fitting that Adam falls to Niffty—not Lucifer, not an overlord, but a common sinner, who sees him as nothing more than a foot soldier that needs to be eliminated, a pest as easily squashed as a roach? For someone as self-aggrandizing as Adam, this has to be one of the most humiliating ways to die. The perfect end for an insufferable antagonist.

But nooo, Vivziepop didn't end it there.

Because INSTEAD, we hear Lute's heart-wrenching screams as she realizes that Adam has just been defeated; we see the look on her tear-streaked face when it registers just how badly he's been injured. The fear in her eyes at the prospect of living in a world without the angel she idolizes, the man she serves.

She's not concerned that she's just lost her arm, or that Vaggie is standing right there. In that moment, the only person in Hell is Adam, and all she wants is for him to stay with her.

Adam could have easily dismissed her feelings entirely. He could have spent his last breath hurling one last insult at Lucifer, getting the satisfaction of having the last word before his death. He could have thrown himself a pity party and cursed his fate.

Instead, this greedy, selfish, murderous fiend has the audacity to see Lute in his field of vision and flash her one last, tender smile.

We don't know for sure what Adam was thinking in this shot, but personally, I think it was something along the lines of I lost. Proud of you, Lute. I'll miss you. Goodbye.

Whatever his final thoughts are, we can surmise from his expression alone that he's accepted his fate, and that he's grateful his last seconds alive are locking eyes with someone who's important to him. Someone he cares about.

And THAT—that was enough to crack through that thick shell of hatred I'd developed for Adam and shatter it like the mask he wore for seven and a half episodes of the show. THAT 8-second moment was enough to make me reconsider my stance on Adam as an irredeemable villain.

(CURSE YOU, VIVIENNE!!!)

Does this scene cancel out all the heinous things Adam does throughout Season 1? All the lives he destroys, all the pain he causes to thousands upon thousands of souls? Absolutely not. But it does change my perception of Adam from "obnoxious egomaniac with no self-awareness" to "obnoxious egomaniac with no self-awareness that is a product of the flawed system he perpetuates."

And, I gotta wonder, what would Adam have been like if Heaven had been different?

kuroo tetsurou - not a mama's boy, not a daddy's boy, but a third, secret thing (a grandma's boy)

he's 8 years old, just moved to tokyo. his dad is at work, and his mother is... he doesn't know where she is, really. wherever she is, his sister is too, and the house is quiet and lonely.

tetsu-kun, his grandmother calls through the empty house, and he follows her voice to the kitchen.

she peers down at him with kind eyes when he rounds the bench. she doesn't have to look far - even at his young age, he's nearly as tall as her. although, her short stature didn't make that much of an achievement.

she holds something silvery in her hands which she shows to him.

mackerel.

kuroo sits on the bench by the stove, watching as she grills it with practised skill. he's focused, intent on not missing a single step. so you can make it for yourself one day, his grandma tells him. she makes it look so easy.

the two of them sit by the window to eat, watching the odd person walk down their street. there's a slight chill to the house, courtesy of the crack under the new front door that lets in a small draught. his dad keeps promising to fix it sometime soon.

but the fish is warm, and pleasantly salty on his tongue; and his grandma sits beside him, letting him nestle into her side like he did when he was really young.

she presses a smacking kiss to his cheek that rings in his ears, and though he grumbles and wipes away the moisture it leaves behind, small chuckles escape them both that float away on the cool air.

and just like that, the house is no longer quiet, nor lonely.

Why I draw Spamton the way I do and in defense of the "Tumblr sexyman" Spamton G. Spamton. An ESSAY.

EDIT 2/3/24 - Fixed some grammatical errors, changed font colors to make them easier to read against a white background, and reframed some of my arguments, especially regarding the "Yaoi style" portion, as it came across as ignorant and spiteful.

I follow the #spamton tag here, and I hate to say it, but it's full of artists jabbing at other artists who so happen to draw Spamton handsome. I see comments like, "No, he's a middle-aged sleazeball who is grungy and dirty." Often, these depictions show him with graying hair, ratty clothes, and covered in filth and grime. While there is nothing inherently wrong about drawing him this way, I find it disingenuous that the same people who draw him this way criticize people who draw him more handsome and or clean-cut because this depiction is even less based on his canon appearance than someone simply drawing him more realistically proportioned and with a pleasing visage (the definition of what this is varies by artist, but they're all often reduced to just "tumblr sexyman.") I see similar comments by people who draw him in what they may describe as "disgusting" or a "dirty scammer."

If Toby intended for Spamton to look dirty and gross, he would have simply gone with a similar design route to this character as an NPC in Undertale.

Toby or other official arts never depict him with the following, even though I see it in fan art all the time:

Ball-jointed hands. Some artists draw them properly and make them look super cool. Simple lines aren't how they look in reality, but I get why people do that. Either way, it's not canon.

Dirty with tattered clothes. Spamton is only ever shown with a black blazer. It's debatable if he wears pants, but Toby has also drawn him with a collared shirt and tie.

Graying hair. Should be obvious. He's only ever seen with jet-black hair.

Overweight/Fat. While some fan depictions of this are cute, it's not canon. Spamton is always drawn thin but not necessarily in shape.

Buff. Same as the above. It looks really good in some fanart but is also not canon.

Tail. It can look really, really cute, but not canon for him or any of the Addisons.

Feathers. Only Swatch and the Swatchlings are depicted with feathers in Cyber World.

"40+ years old" - There is zero evidence of this in-game or in official merchandise or media. This assumption apparently comes from people assuming that his birthday would be the same as the first "spam email," which (at the time of this writing) was 46 years ago. This is a false equivalency since there is no indication that Spamton has any associations with our real-world history of spam emails. It should also be noted that this was not a true spam email. The only thing closest to Spamton in association with real spam email history may be his favorite year, 1997, in which spam marketing emails became frequent nuisances. However, actions to stop spam mail started in 1996, and it was by the 2000s that they became a serious concern because technology had since advanced. If he were truly born in 1978, he would only be 19 by 1997. While not impossible, it's not how most people see him in his Big Shot years of barely just entering adulthood. Also, as someone who has lived through most of the 90s, I can attest to a lot of this. Spam stuff existed, but news reports only heavily got into it by the 2000s.

100% Inorganic or Robot. While a cool idea, there is more evidence against this, like his ability to eat, sleep, and genuinely feel pain.

Boobs. I get most people who do this are doing it for fun, but it's not canon to his design, lol.

Tall. The most obvious one. Spamton is below average height, as made evident by his nearly 1:1 scale with Kris, a teenager.

Toddler-sized. Same as above. I won't lie that it can be drawn super cute, though. Haha!

With all that being said, why is it such a contention among his fans to depict him as handsome?

There is evidence to support that Spamton is at least, to some degree, good-looking but unconventionally attractive based on several sources. It should be noted that people often use his shop sprite as the best representation of his head, but this isn't accurate, either. In Undertale and Deltarune, because of its cartoonish sprites, it shouldn't surprise anyone that Spamton's are the most inaccurate and change frequently. Another user posted an entire comparison of all his sprites and how drastically inconsistent they are. I tried searching through my likes for this, but I can't find it. If anyone finds this, please link or reblog it to this post. Anyway, the intent of the post was to show artists that there are numerous different ways you can interpret Spamton's design with what's provided in the game, alone.

Stuff people often miss that is canon:

Lips. Believe it or not, this bastard's got kissable lips. Toby's recent art and his Neo attack are proof of this.

Eyes under the glasses. Seen in his sprite of going "BIG SHOT" the first time with Kris. It also hints at heterochromia because they contrast in color with yellow pupils under the pink and pink under the yellow.

NEO has no visible jaw hinge line. Only puppet Spamton does. Big Shot Spamton doesn't have one, either.

NEO's glasses' colors are reversed, and they are pince-nez style.

Androgynous sense of fashion. This is the least missed one, but it's worth mentioning. Spamton has no issues wearing pink, a color nowadays associated with women, and the NEO body has fabulous heels in addition to mostly being a magenta pink. The dress on the mannequin that greatly resembles him (and may hint at him being a white Addison before) shows a pretty dress that mirrors the one Mettaton wore in Undertale.

So then, WHY is he being depicted as handsome or unconventionally good-looking a BAD thing?

There really shouldn't be an issue with it at all. It's less offensive and technically more canon than many of the supposed depictions of him being a sleazebag who looks like he hasn't showered in a century and is hooked up on drugs or booze. You don't become a media darling without a charming personality. Mettaton only got successful in Undertale before he got his EX body because there was literally nothing else the people could watch. Spamton, on the other hand, was competing against many, so he had to stand out and look good even with the help of Mike (and possibly Tenna).

I often see people make this very reductive argument that it's a "yaoi style." This is by far one of the stupidest arguments I've ever seen. Drawing good-looking men is NOT equivalent to liking Yaoi. There are plenty of other genres of Asian-origin or Anime-styled media that feature pretty boys that have nothing to do with Boy's Love. Even Shounen anime has some bishies. Drawing bishounen-style male characters is a design choice and does not indicate someone's interest in Yaoi media. I swear, I have never seen this problem with Eastern fans. It's rude to lump people with similar art styles under something most people who make this claim don't even understand. I've seen people make upset comments about other people calling their style stuff like "Cal-Arts" even if they never went to Cal-Arts or like the media produced by them. It's the same principle. Stop lumping entire artists under one umbrella.

I draw him handsome because it's simply the way I see him. I love many other depictions of him, undoubtedly, and I even have a sticker set that depicts him with the graying hair, but it looks really good anyway. My point is, the fact that people who draw him dark and handsome shouldn't be scrutinized any more than people who draw him way more off base.

My personal contentions with the assumption he is a "dirty sleazebag old man."

I find this absolutely hilarious because this is a genuine stereotype and stock character of people similar to him. The douchebag salesman is a trope that's been around for a long time, but people don't seem to realize that this is a caricature and not representative of real salespeople.

Go to any @$%^ing department store or even an electronics one. Do you ever see anyone selling you stuff looking like they crawled out of the trash? Most are lower-class people who can't find any other job, meaning they are stuck with sales. It takes skill to be a good salesman, and I hate to brag, but I can probably sell you a #@$%ing soap bar and convince you that the extra $10 you're spending on it over a drugstore brand is better for your hands by deeply moisturizing them through herbal extracts and only "naturally" derived cleansing agents. Your hands are dry from the cold, drawing moisture out of them, so the investment would be worth it for the health of your skin during this harsh winter season. Why risk a drugstore brand that will only make your hands feel even rougher, flakier, and cracked? Stuff like this requires you to look someone in the eyes and observe who they are—their body language, way of carrying themselves, and the cadence of how they respond to your words. Does it always work? No. However, do you think anyone would $%^&ing buy ANY LEGAL PRODUCT if a salesperson looked like they were a shady crack dealer who was suspicious as %^&( to deal with? NO. It's a stereotype caricature for a REASON. It's meant to demean the reality of the salesperson who is forced to peddle a stupid product for a living. It's hard, and if anything, GET MAD at the people who are the ones making the crappy product! Yeah, some salesmen are bad at their jobs, but do you really believe that Cyber City's #1 RATED SALESMAN got there from being mediocre?! He may have gotten outside help for something that Toby never made clear, but he definitely does NOT lack the personality to make a great salesman. And believe it or not, there is plenty of evidence to prove he WASN'T bad at it! The other NPCs sell stuff that was once his goods but with his labels removed, and based on his statement of wanting to "make his own deals," this heavily implies he was NOT selling products he wanted to sell before he became a Big Shot. He has a strong sense of pride in the way he sees and presents himself, and I think this may be overlooked by people who make him look as ratty as possible.

I will also CLEARLY state this but this depiction overall does several of the following, which I KNOW many people will say is bad:

Ageism. Why do so many people, mostly Zoomers, assume that a man in his 40s is washed-up, gross, or even considered old? I've seen hotter men in their 40s than some young men in their early 20s.

Downplays his mental health struggles. One of the best things about Spamton is how he DOESN'T play into just the "sleazebag" stereotype. Once we go into his shop, we see that he is truly just a very broken man. His theme song is a FARCE to try and convince you that he's tougher than he really is.

Classist/Poor-Shaming. The assumption that a homeless person has to have no sense of cleanliness. Please, for the love of all that is good, meet actual homeless people. Not all of them are like this. Spamton clearly keeps himself rather clean for someone who dumpster dives. He is trying to stay true to himself, and his sense of self is one of pride. There is no dialogue or description to imply he smells or lacks proper hygiene.

Again, while there is nothing inherently wrong with drawing him this way, I just want people to be more aware of why they draw him this way. Think of it like a thought experiment to reflect on why you see him the way you do. How I draw Spamton comes from a place of deep empathy, love, and life experiences I've had in sales in addition to ALWAYS being customer-facing, meaning I know what works and what doesn't for over a DECADE. It's rather bizarre to me that people who claim to be big fans of him draw him in such a demeaning way that goes beyond the canon depiction and lowers him to absolute dirt, almost like beating this character with the ugly stick just because it's "funny." Is he a tragic character to you? Or is he simply a clown to laugh at for his failures and hardships? How we depict and see people is utterly fascinating because it reflects in real life, too.

You can take the exact same person and show them to different groups of people, and they will all see the same person differently. They don't have to be artists, but they tend to vary if you ask their opinions. For example, I think the actor Mads Mikkelsen is very attractive, but I know many who wouldn't understand why. A guy I've had a crush on for years is one of the hottest men ever to me, but a friend of mine called him "just a guy."

I fully understand that some people find the way I draw him stupid. It is what it is. I can't force you to like it.

I'm simply trying to point out my reasonings for why I draw him this way, and I would like others to think about their methods, too, and NOT to bash other people outright or go "ewww Yaoi tumblr sexyman" just because someone doesn't depict him with stereotypical traits or as "100% canon style" (which is mostly just copying the game's sprite style.)

The Observants lack depth perception. They're estranged from human emotion and are partially responsible for overseeing the continuation of the time stream. They view everything as being very black-and-white, whereas Clockwork sees all the different shades of grey.

CW never actually foresaw Danny or his accident.

Ghostly Obsessions are tied to a ghost's soul/core and CW is an extension of the universe. He's always had this sense of anticipation that was always there but only become aware of it as time went on. He kinda had to shield the other Ancients and their conceptions but he never had to actually hide them like he did with Danny. He had to completely turn his face and focus his gaze elsewhere, and as the time of Danny's accident came closer he started to sense things rather than see them - kinda like a spider sitting in the middle of its web. While CW can see the future and all these possibilities and realities, he's literally a chunk of the universe and his powers aren't limited to just his sight. CW's feelings of protectiveness could be attributed to his Obsession or the fact that he's a sentient piece of the universe - the universe that brought about Danny's half-dead existence in the first place.

The matter of CW's free will is a little messy. He's sentient and has his own feeling and thoughts and can make his own decisions, but he's ruled by his Obsession and by extension the universe itself. His Obsession has more influence over him when compared to other ghosts, but that could also be because CW is way more aware of his Obsession and how it affects him. It's hard to tell where his Obsession ends and where it begins cause he's pretty much a reflection of the universe. He doesn't really follow the same rules as the other ghosts cause he isn't even a ghost to begin with - he's essentially whatever the universe needs him to be. Which he is very much at peace with.

The same way no one will ever be able to truly understand the state of the universe or the universe itself - CW is very much vast and unknowable.

As for Danny being an Ancient - what he represents is very complicated and hard to put into words (which is why CW and he are so much alike).

First off - all the other Ancients became Ancients after they died (not counting Life and Death, who - before Danny - were the beings most similar to CW and his existence). Danny died but is also still very much alive - which confuses the heck out of everyone who isn't CW. In a way, he is, but also isn't, an Ancient - much like CW. Danny (the ancient) was created from the portal - AKA the tear between life and death. An Ancient is created from the creation of a concept/idea/something important, and their creation essentially solidifies whatever concept they represent, in the universe. An Ancient brings about the creation of their concept - but the creation of their concept also beckons them - the Ancient - into being. It's kinda like a - which came first; the chicken or the egg? - kinda situation.

Everyone across the realms of the dead heard him scream - which is why so many powerful ghosts keep hanging around near the portal since a lot of the weaker ghosts got scared off and the stronger ones wanted to check it out. A Ghostly Wail is the last scream of a person before they die and only spirits that had truly horrifying deaths/lives have one. So it's safe to say that if someone's scream was loud enough to reach all corners of the realms (and they aren't even dead yet) then that means that something truly history-changing just happened.

Danny was created in order to stabilise the portal - which is the simplest most fundamental/naive way to explain it. Life and Death aren't meant to have a middle ground but Danny has created/become that middle ground as consequence of the tear between worlds. The portal didn't open up with Danny inside it - the portal opened up inside of Danny. It split his soul almost in two (his two halves are kinda holding onto each other by a few threads) and stabilised the bridge between the two realms. Danny is the middle ground.

He's also a lot more than that. He also encompasses the after-effects of the portal being created. Image what would happen IRL if ghosts, spirits and 'life after death' was confirmed. How many religions and beliefs would be reinforced or disproven? How many new fears and hopes would be born from it? He isn't necessarily the Ancient of balance - he is way more than that. He encompasses the shift and change that is required for balance to exist in the first place. Balance is hella fragile and can never truly be achieved and that is what Danny represents. Yes, he does try to keep the balance and the peace between the two realms - but he was born from that need for balance - those fleeting sensations that you can never quite hold onto before they disappear. But the thing is - all Ancients are created to keep the balance.

He's the Ancient of the not-quite-small things and the not-quite-big things. He's the dichotomy of everything and nothing and his existence is too vast to be truly put into words. He represents the clashing of two things that aren't meant to be. Which makes him the only being in existence that could truly be compared to CW.

CW encompasses the universe and everything that ties into the timelines - while Danny encompasses everything that exists within the timelines and everything that ties into the universe.

Rinne is clingy.

“Rinne suddenly realizes she loves Houtaro! There’s no buildup!” seems like the main reason a lot of people dislike the current arc of Gotchard.

Okay, but take it back a second. Rinne is established to be an outsider amongst her peers. She focused on school and alchemy, and nothing else. Her relationship with her father became strained when he was revealed to have “betrayed” the alchemists’ union (thanks Gereyon). She can’t say anything, because she’s just a child against the masked whoevers in charge of the union. Rinne is the child of a traitor, and now she feels personally betrayed by her father. Because she can’t speak against the union, she bottles up her feelings, and thus, she becomes very cynical and aloof.

Rinne cannot let herself trust anyone, else she might get betrayed again.

Even in the alchemist academy, where she has Sabimaru and Renge (and Spanner, I guess), she doesn’t make a connection with them. She does her own business, they do theirs.

Then enters Houtaro. He quickly becomes a recurring presence in her life after joining the alchemist academy, and slowly manages to break down her barriers. He flips everything she’s perceived about friends and relationships on her head. Suddenly, she’s made a connection. Through Houtaro, she makes connections to the rest of the academy. Rinne becomes friends with Renge and Sabimaru, and the Chemies as well. She goes out to eat with Renge. She becomes comfortable enough with Houtaro (and Kajiki?) to show off her love of spooky things, a side that the old her would have likely hidden. She’s growing up. She may get annoyed with them, but they’re the first friends she’s made in a while, if ever. And Houtaro is the one who helped her build those bridges, supporting her, and she supports him right back. Rinne is happier than she’s ever been, now with friends and purpose in her life.

Aside from her father, Houtaro is her greatest connection and her best friend.

At the same time, however, Rinne is subconsciously relying on Houtaro to be an emotional support for herself. Even if she believes in him, she doesn’t fully believe in herself, even after gaining the power to become Majade. Rinne looks to Houtaro to reaffirm his belief in her and support for her; if he doesn’t do that, she doubts herself. And with Tsukumo suddenly taking up all of Houtaro’s attention, she’s not receiving that affirmation. Her first/best friend and largest connection is being cut off by someone else, and seems to have replaced her.

Subconsciously, Rinne is clingy. Mostly towards Houtaro, but also towards the rest of the squad. She feels like she, and socially awkward introvert, belongs with a group of friends.

She’s maybe a bit jealous, but now, she’s anxious that her connection to Houtaro is diminishing because of his childhood friend who literally came out of nowhere and inserted herself back into his life. And now that subconscious clinginess has become more prominent.

And now she’s doubting herself again.

If Rinne can’t be supported by Houtaro, or if she can’t support Houtaro, does her presence matter with Tsukumo around? Everyone, from Kajiki to Tamami, seems to gel well with Tsukumo hovering around Houtaro, trying to grab his attention with her big ol’ doe eyes. Suddenly she’s become the outsider again. Rinne isn’t questioning if she loves Houtaro, she’s questioning herself and her self-worth.

And Tsukumo, if unintentional, feeds into that doubt. Her declaration to be able to go after Houtaro without any worries feeds Rinne’s self-doubt.

And Atropos is really, really, REALLY, good at fueling that doubt even further.

What if Houtaro starts doubting her? What if her entire friend group suddenly doubts her? Suddenly she’s in her father’s shoes. Is she going to be branded a traitor as well?

(Okay, maybe that’s a stretch)

Houtaro is pure of heart and dumb of ass, so it’s unlikely he’ll turn on her. He’s able to recognize that she was hurting in episode 14, can see the good in humans and Chemies alike, and also seems to be better at socializing… save for recognizing when Tsukumo is flirting with him.

But the worry is still planted. Maybe that’s why Minato tells her to fight as herself in the preview? So she can believe in herself? Rinne has relied on Houtaro to help her believe in herself, but the what-if of if he doesn’t has been provoked.

The main writer of Gotchard is Hasegawa, who graciously gifted us with Yomogi and Yume from SSSS.DYNAZENON, a show that also featured a relationship between two high schoolers. The buildup between Yomogi and Yume versus Houtaro and Rinne is similar: two teenagers learning to support one another. What differs is that Yomogi and Yume are both emotionally scarred by their past, and they learn how to heal and bond as a result, while Rinne is relying of Houtaro to support her as she heals. Houtaro doesn’t seem to carry any kind of emotional baggage going into forming a connection with Rinne, aside from a missing father, so he’s not needing reassurance of himself. He needs reassurance from everyone equally to bring out Gotchard’s full strength. It’s doubtful he would recognize that he’s been christened as Rinne’s emotional support extrovert.

Something about the Fates serving both as themselves and as every active force against Orpheus and Eurydice (Eurydice especially). They are the wind. They are the storm. They are the rocks, stone and beasts that stand in the way. The judging eye and the - literal active controllers of fate and life.

Again one of my absolute favorite moments is when Eurydice is fighting the storm and they just pluck everything out of her hands with a smile. It’s both wonderful as a ‘wind so strong it feels someone grabbed it away from you’ and it feels personal. They’ve been following her her entire life and right as she gets a good thing it’s taken from her/the hope to stay is beaten out of her.

It makes me wonder if at some point, in a retelling or perhaps the first time, one of them must have done something and the Fates have taken it personally ever since. No matter how many times it happens they ensure it ends the same. They are the voice in Hades ear, they are Orpheus’s doubt, Eurydice’s worry. Hermes just narrates but from the very beginning the fates manipulate and weave what they want to happen. In some versions they fell slighted because Orpheus actually gets them to cry, maybe that was it. Or maybe Eurydice turned against her path one to many times and fell in love over and over despite how they try to get her to move on. Who knows? But I love it.

A reminder that Reiner's main goal to be a hero was not to save the world necessarily, but to be accepted by his parents. It's just... if saving the world is what it took to be accepted, he'll gladly undertake hell or high water just to be the hero that he felt would grant him the love, acknowledgement, and acceptance of the people meant everything to him.

So, you know, as I rewatch his scene with Eren during the start of W. Tybur's speech, I can't help but think about this. And how this could have added why he mentioned that he was a bad person. That it wasn't about the environment he grew up in... but that he was just a bad person. Because, if I factor in his desire, I can feel that at the back of his mind... his own selfishness was the reason why they are where they are now. Why so many was killed, why so many innocent people had to die.

It's not just about being brainwashed.

Because remember, he tell Eren that he just wanted to be a hero, he wanted to be respected. Which is true. And while he didn't say it out loud, making it seem like he wanted to be seen as a hero and respected by the majority, he does want the to be a hero to earn the respect of his mother.

Who never once (at this point at least because it was never shown, and based from her personality, probably never did) told him that she was proud of him for any reason. For coming back, for winning the war, for surviving, etc. The most that Reiner probably had in terms of acknowledgment from Karina would be two things: Him becoming a warrior candidate, and him being chosen as a Warrior.

When I think about how Reiner would have felt during his first meeting with his mom after being extracted from Paradis, I feel like crying. (My tears are very shallow for this man. He gets hurt in any way, I cry.) Because if you look at how he was acting when he told Karina he no longer has the Armored Titan... he looked so scared, even apprehensive about telling her, looked so expectant of rejection, looked so expectant of his mom's disappointment... that he couldn't even look her in the eye. This literally screamed to me that during the time he returned to Marley, his mother could have given him a look of disappointment or a lecture on how they had achieved nothing in those six years, threw him a bit of slack because they at least managed to bring back the Jaw. How horrified she must have looked when Reiner mentions that he might be stripped of the Armor. And despite how, she would not lash out at him, she would give him a look that reflects disappointment.

I still remember that scene where they come back from Liberio and Reiner's looking on at how happy his uncle and auntie were when Gabi came home safe, expressed how proud of her they were.

I feel like... during his entire stay in Marley after the extraction from Paradis, he has never been hugged by his mother.

Which is why, as much as majority of the fanbase dislike Karina (god, even TV Tropes had nothing good to say about her), I'm glad she made it out alive. Because it's her acceptance that truly cements Reiner's happiness. It's the one goal he worked so hard to achieve. IF she had died, Reiner will eventually learn to be happy, but there's always going to be a gap there that no one would ever be able to fill.

I also might have finished 1/3 Ballister references…

miwip wednesday except it’s actually Saturday bc I was oh so busy this week </3

“kuroo tetsurou, son of zeus” “kuroo tetsurou, son of athena” SHUSH ✋✋✋

kuroo tetsurou, son of hermes.

hermes, god of travellers and crossroads; and his son, who guides his peers through their own journeys. a conduit for tsukishima, for kenma, for lev and shibayama to recognise for themselves their potential. hermes’ son, who makes it his life’s mission to inspire and lead as many people to volleyball as he can, enticing them down the path until they realise it’s not just the club they thought it was.

hermes, god of messengers and connection; and his son, captain of a nationally-ranked volleyball team that prides itself on a rock-solid defence based in communication. whose central principle is to be blood, and circulate oxygen so that their brain may function at his best. a team whose maxim is to connect.

smart, quick-thinking hermes, god of wit and cunning and trickery; and his smart, quick-thinking son, who can watch someone for two minutes and know just which buttons to press to rile them up. who can exchange banter with an easy, feline grin that, if you were to study for a bit too long, starts to look like bared teeth that could eat you alive if their owner so pleased. whose hazel eyes constantly flicker with mischief, and you wonder if what you’re really seeing is a flicker of his father.

kuroo tetsurou, son of hermes.

another thing that never fails to amuse me is how offended Lance gets when anyone hits him with the typical demonic possession lore like I'm sorry you're going through this and that this thing took so many things from u and is possessing u and is taking ur choice awa... And he's just immediately like

Excuse u, that was my choice, I quite literally asked it to squat and protect my ass and ackschually it chose me, m'kay. We chose each other, m'kay??????

Nevermind the fact that he had to make that choice while starving, completely isolated after being kidnapped, and while like a second away from quite literally getting stabbed to death. But sure buddy, you definitely made that choice for shits and giggles and it totally chose you because it just wants to be your friend, no one's exploiting you at all or anything, no sir. You're just besties and this one's totally different just because it lets you steer the boat 80 per cent of the time. Never mind the 20 per cent where it doesn't let you steer the boat. Nah, that's just for your protection and to keep saving your life, sure sure.

Gotchard and love languages

Watching Gotchard (and being probably one of the very few fans of the show) got me in the mood to do some more character insight and character study. I really enjoy watching how the characters interact with one another, which is easily one of the main strengths of the main writer, Hasegawa. In particular, the smaller moments and scenes stand out to me more than the bigger plot points, though more so for the students than the adults.

Crap, I sound like Kyuun.

Renge

Let’s start with the Osaka alchemist, Renge. Renge initially sticks out as a receiving gifts kind of person. She’s very upfront about possessions, seeming very comfortable with asking Houtaro to trade two of her on hand Chemies (Energyl and Sasukemaru, the bois!). When Minato moves to mind wipe his students, Renge’s immediate action after escaping is to start discarding her prized alchemy equipment, as Sabimaru points out. Renge felt happy receiving her alchemist tools, because it meant that she could start making an effort to help her family’s financial situation. But now those tools become a reminder of the state of the academy under Geryon’s control.

Around the time everyone resolves to keep collecting (and saving) the Chemies, Renge’s love language shifts to quality time. Some part of her has realized that she’s happier spending time with Sabimaru, Houtaro, and Rinne, more so than when she was all in on learning how to be a big-shot alchemist. Really, all four members of the Kitchen ICHINOSE Alliance seem to gravitate more towards quality time after they meet Daybreak Houtaro. Beyond that, however, Renge’s character moments become more focused on her bond with the others: how she and Sabimaru planned out extracting and transmuting Zukyunpire’s essence as a counter against the Abyssalis sisters as a way of supporting their Kamen Rider junior students. The Ninetail arc in her grandmother’s hometown really sells how Renge is focusing on spending time with her loved ones. Even when the Kyūbi Malgam unearths the hot springs, Renge focuses on how her grandmother’s town is safe, and that she’s still going to be able to visit her, rather than be like, “My Nana’s hometown can make money!”

Sabimaru

In contrast to Renge, Sabimaru starts out as a quality time kind of guy. Given that he’s poor at communication without the help of Isaac, it’s a bit surprising to see that just being around his new junior, Houtaro, is enough to get him excited about Chemy hunting. It’s not about hunting for the Chemies that gets to him, it’s more about how he can now spend time with others who share his interests. And that extends to the Chemies as well. Aside from Houtaro, Sabimaru is easily the next best friend to the Chemies, with how he’s seen playing with them while Houtaro and Rinne are away on their school trip. When he’s invited to the Ichinose Christmas celebration, he bonds with Kajiki about the idea that Santa is an alien. Now he has another friend outside of the academy that he can share interests in.

His brief stint as Dread also further reinforces his need for quality time. The way Sabimaru acts while captured by the Sisters, and his reluctance to fight, despite being strong armed to do so (so much so he breaks his arm trying to resist), it’s clear he misses his classmates. His friends. And when Houtaro saves him with the power of UFO-X, a Chemy he’s been fascinated with, he’s elated. He’s home, he’s back with his friends, he can spend time with them again, he’s not going to die as a pawn of the Sisters. Sabimaru is definitely going to double down on quality time with his friends.

Spanner

Spanner is a bit difficult to pin down, mainly because he’s a jackass so elusive. Despite that, it feels like Spanner responds more to physical touch, which is ironic, since he keeps everyone at arm’s length. Obviously, he doesn’t make many moves to get to know the rest of the gang, especially Houtaro, but it’s more telling when the only one he really lets in is his mother Kyoka. Kyoka is the only one who is shown to be allowed to invade Spanner’s personal space. When Houtaro offers him a handshake, he brushes him off. When he and Houtaro are duking it out over possession of the Gotchardriver, he’s keeping Houtaro at a distance, only striking him with the bokuto. When he takes over Houtaro’s call to Sabimaru, he basically rips Sabi’s phone from his hands (rude). Even Rinne, who we see he’s making an effort to be cordial to, he avoids contact with. When Bolt has her dangling in the air, Spanner ignores her and goes straight for him.

When his parents are revived, it’s one of the few times Spanner is visibly happy. Full smile and everything, not the arrogant smirk he gives the younger students (Houtaro). While he doesn’t physically interact with them, the implications of his time as Kyoka’s ward really start to sink in. Without his parents to offer him guidance, Spanner will lose himself to his black flames. The flashbacks of his adjustment to living with Kyoka show her hugging him, patting his shoulder in congratulations and encouragement, physically interacting with him. He’s not completely happy with her, but his is better than if he were to be left alone. And especially after he returns as Kamen Rider Valvarad, the first thing Kyoka does? She side-hugs him. Spanner, despite the torment and despairing realization he’ll never see his parents again, is content.

Atropos, Clotho, and Lachesis

All three of the Abyssalis sisters start as receivers of words of affirmation, especially from Geryon. Leading up to his appearance, everything is for HIS plans. They don’t really have any other purpose than to start development on the Dreadriver. However, the creation of Dread isn’t as important to them as gaining Geryon’s approval.

Clotho is the simplest of the sisters, at least at first. Receiving the belly warmer power-up to her is evident that she’s received Geryon’s approval. And that seems to be all she needs. Grabbing the Gotchardriver from Houtaro would grant him access to the Door of Darkness, and further their plans. The process of doing so would easily net her more approval, so she steps up her game to seize power. But then Geryon gets yeeted into the shadow realm disappears, leaving her without purpose. Houtaro’s questioning of her purpose, her Gotcha, makes her realize that she craves approval, but also that she wants to keep her sisters, her family, intact. She craves quality time with Lachesis and Atropos, but her pride and rivalry with Houtaro prevents her from admitting so. And with her recent power up, who would need quality time when she can easily crush her rival?

Atropos is very clear cut from the start. She’s easily Geryon’s favorite, so out the gate she’s the only one receiving praise, apologies, and validation. Her specialty in escalating the situation easily wins her most of Geryon’s approval, so she’s content with keeping the situation as uniform as possible. Unlike Clotho, who basically wallows in uncertainty after his disappearance, Atropos doubles down on the scheming and escalating the situation, imagining herself winning more of Geryon’s affection, likely as a coping mechanism. The incident with Tsukumo could also be her attempt to deprive Rinne of her love language, as revenge for the disappearance of her own parent.

Unlike her sisters, Lachesis has rarely received Geryon’s approval. She’s the only one who doubts his leadership and methods. When Clotho tries to overclock the Dreadriver to take down Gotchard at the likely cost of her own life, Lachesis is visibly scared and worried for her sister, realizing that his plans don’t account for the sisters’ well-being. Upon Geryon’s arrival, he basically HIJACKS her body to be used for the Orochi Malgam, and leaves her defeated and alone, if not for Clotho coming to retrieve her. When Geryon creates the Cerberus Malgam, he doesn’t even bat an eye when Lachesis is thrown aside and injured, and only shows concern for Atropos, leaving the youngest sister bitter and envious. And then the tipping point comes when Geryon targets Spanner. Now Lachesis, having been given the short stick multiple times, bears witness to how truly relentless and unforgiving Geryon truly is. Is she going to be tortured like Spanner? Suddenly validation doesn’t seem so enticing when she’s at the risk of being torn apart in exchange.

Now Lachesis understands the hollowness of Geryon’s approval. Why should she try to receive validation when it’s clear he never cared for her in the first place? Her misgivings are further cemented when her own sisters are ordered to eliminate her. Clotho is hesitant, but Atropos is all in. Now she’s been abandoned, so what else can she do? She flees. Joins up with the Alchemists’ Academy as a ward of Kyoka. Lachesis is not happy, and the only love language she’s ever known now seems hollower than ever.

Rinne

I won’t go much into Rinne’s analysis since I did that in my last post. But at the very least, it’s obvious that Rinne is recipient to words of affirmation, just like the sisters. Her self-esteem is lower than that of her peers, though that may be the result of her self-isolation and full focus into her studies and alchemy, so it stands to reason that just hearing encouragement from another person (Houtaro) would be enough to make her feel seen, loved, and happy. Like mentioned above, Atropos capitalizes on this with Tsukumo by creating a scenario where Rinne would be unable to receive affirmation from her greatest connection, Houtaro, though this isn’t the case, since Houtaro absolutely trusts Rinne no matter what. In #4, just hearing Houtaro say that he believes her is enough to convince Rinne to escape the labyrinth. Houtaro believes her, believes in her, and is willing to let her know that as much as he can.

A side tangent: as seen in #14, as well as outright stated by Clotho in #27, the Gotchardriver gains power through cheers, encouragement, and belief. As such, it’s probable that the Alchemis Driver works similarly, only the effect is much more noticeable. Before Minato arrives to encourage Rinne, she’s getting easily overwhelmed by the Mammoth Malgam, enough so that her transformation fails. As soon as her teacher arrives and tells her to, “Fight like yourself,” she’s able to overpower the Malagm right back. And with enough encouragement, Majade is able to synergize herself easily with Platinum Gotchard.

Houtaro

The Gotcha boy himself. Houtaro is definitely one of the happier characters on the show, always surrounded by his friends and loved ones, whether they be Chemy or human. So it would stand to reason he’d be the happiest receiving words of affirmation or spending quality time with others. Yes, that’s true, but Houtaro seems to be at his brightest whenever he’s engaging in acts of service. For him, the simple act of helping someone is enough to make him happy. Receiving affirmation and quality time is also important, but to him, they’re more like smaller goals that help him reach the overall larger picture goal. Fighting against Malgams and freeing the Chemies will definitely make the Chemies happy that they are understood and have someone who is so willing to just be their friend, instead of seeing them as tools or freaks of nature. And if there’s someone who’s connected to the Chemy incident of the week? Houtaro makes it his goal to help them as well. Think of Mr. Asahi, who gave up on pro wrestling, only to be able to live his dream again thanks to Houtaro’s intervention. What about Riku, the boy with an overbearing parent? If eliminating the malice in his father’s heart can help resolving things and bring a happy end to all parties, then Houtaro is all for it. A classmate who wants to revive the drama club? Houtaro is willing to take part in the play just to get more students to join. Who cares if they find his acting hokey, or if Rinne s l a p s him in the middle of the show? As long as Mikuriya’s satisfied, then that’s great! Even at the cost of his well-being (fighting monsters) or striving for his Gotcha, Houtaro aims to make people happy.

Because isn’t that what Kamen Riders do?

His cooking skills also point to him favoring acts of service as a love language. Here, he is expressing his appreciation, his acknowledgment, what have you, of the recipient. Of course, since his choice of ingredients is… unique, the response of disgust and/or dismissal (or insults, in Spanner’s case) would be seen as a refusal or a downplay of his act of service. Rinne’s comment of “Something’s off,” followed by his outburst of “No Gotcha!” shows that he’s upset the other person didn’t understand his feelings. Of course, being Houtaro, it’s not enough to make him give up, and instead, he resolves to better next time. And the next time. So on and so forth. Until his feelings are properly conveyed.

TLDR, I love the character interactions in this show, and I’ve spent so much time thinking about it.

Ruby, from Laini Taylor's duology Strange the Dreamer

Okay.

So, one of the things that I see the community agree on is that Reiner would make a great father; will be excited about the prospects of fatherhood; would be very doting to his children and children to be.

I totally agree with this. And I think he'd be really happy to establish a family of his own that's technically the epitome of an accepting and loving home.

Although at the back of my mind, I think it's a prospect that also scares him. No doubt he can make it happen, but not without some difficulties… as with all things.

When I begin to consider the kind of parents that he had… I feel like parenthood is a can of worms that he has but is kept unopened.

He's always going to strive to make sure that his children will feel accepted, will make sure to always remind them how proud he is of them… but at the back of his mind, I feel like he'll wonder if he's cut out to be a father. Can he do it? Does he have what it takes? How does he know that he's doing the right thing?

But most importantly, will he be loved by his children… considering that his own father wanted nothing to do with him.

For as far as he can remember, he's never had anyone who he could call a father. He has a mother who he loves dearly, but has has not been around her all that much to get a good idea on how to actually raise children of his own. I don't think Reiner thinks much about Karina's dismissive attitude towards his well being at times because it's natural to have someone inherit the Armored; especially if it's by another person in the family. It makes her proud, so he doesn't mind it much. He has his brotherly traits too; but would that be enough to raise a family either… especially when he may feel like he developed those in order to replace Marcel.

What if he doesn't realize that he himself is enough? He's always going to be thankful for his significant other but sometimes, even with that support, he may find it hard to believe in himself… to see himself in the way that they do. Especially since he knows himself the best.

I just think that it's going to take a lot of conditioning on his part, a lot of encouragement, and a lot of affirmation that he's going to be a good dad, and that he deserves to be one regardless of what his own thought of him in the past.

And that he wont be abandoned somewhere along the way; much like his mother was when she was carrying him in her belly.

⁺₊ ﹙ㅤ𝟑-𝟓 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐌𝐔𝐒𝐄 𝐂𝐀𝐍 𝐄𝐀𝐒𝐈𝐋𝐘 𝐁𝐄 𝐈𝐃𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐈𝐅𝐈𝐄𝐃 𝐁𝐘 .ㅤ﹚

𝐂𝐎𝐋𝐎𝐑𝐒 :ㅤvermillion , like the gleam in his eyes . lapis lazuli , amber , and emerald green of the jewellery he puts on .

𝐒𝐂𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐒 :ㅤit’s hard to say . some say he smells of honey and ripe fruit , like figs , with a faint, almost heady sweetness . some find his scent clean , grounding , unlike the scene he’s often found in . the very rare few who are not under his spell , say a particular metallic smell , however slight , forever lingers on him . it strikes their gut feeling a slight , wrong way .

𝐅𝐀𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐎𝐍 :ㅤflowy shirts , with a cinched waist . dangling earrings . sharp nails .

𝐎𝐁𝐉𝐄𝐂𝐓𝐒 :ㅤan old , yet still sharp as ever , dagger with its hilt encrusted in gold and ruby , he has to be careful not to hurt himself on it . a necklace with fangs belonging to ... some creature , that’s for sure , he made it himself ! his small perfume collection , in case his charm starts wearing off before they get to the main dish ( his date ) .

𝐁𝐎𝐃𝐘 𝐋𝐀𝐍𝐆𝐔𝐀𝐆𝐄 :ㅤa killer smile ! carries himself with buoyancy and flair almost theatrical at times . serpentine in his fluid movements , rarely standing straight or still , likes leaning against his person of interest . eye contact is what sets his spell in motion , what becomes hard to pull away from .

𝐀𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐓𝐈𝐂𝐒 :ㅤred , red , red . definitely inhuman . you cannot look away . whispers of passionate promises and fervent worship tumbling out one after another . sharp teeth sinking deep , marks an unfortunate prey's last throes .

tagged by :ㅤ@hopeharmed ( ♡ ! ) tagging :ㅤ@villain-he , @asinusxdomi , @starpoacher , @fangier , @killerhubby , @intcritus , @heincus , @strawbelina , @nezumivc103221 , & if you haven't done it / want to do it c:

Art study of the muses of theater .

Based on the photo by Retlaw Snellac Photography on flickr the golden faced muses of Drama, Tragedy, and Comedy.