favorite things | pmylm drabble (jyh)
⇢ favorite things - drabble one // ft. the pmylm couple
summary: yunho's been having a rough time adjusting to the 'real world' and gets upset when he can't have the person he needs the most right away.
words: 2.8k
warnings: cussing/mature language, jealousy/insecurities, yuyu is upset and doesn't really know how to control his feelings rn cause he is just a tired boy 😭, a small lil fight, the awkward silent treatment, yuyu and yeo talk thru his feelings for a bit, kissing/making out, sorry if i missed anything i quickly whipped the rest of this in bed lol
a/n: whipped this baby up because i just felt the need to and i missed my babies!! (+ this lil IG inspo hehe) more drabbles to come 🫶🏼 love you in slow motion update this weekend annnnd i’m gonna have to push back the fallen angel hwa fic cause im all over the place 🥹 but we’ll do better!! lol stay tuned!!
Yunho has entered the real world and he is exhausted. When his mom used to joke about living and working in this so-called real world, he used to think it was just a thing to keep him on his toes, shake him up a little bit.
Nope, that shit was all real.
And he hates it.
He hates it because it's the one thing that brings another fight to the table for your relationship. Ultimately, Yunho knows all he has to do is adjust and he'll be fine in the long run. Both of you will be fine in the long run.
But today, that feels like a stretch and he is short of patience. Unusually short of patience than usual. He knows you don't mean any harm but for some odd reason, today he feels like the world is going to swallow him alive and everything is triggering.
The first thing is the fact that he has to stay a bit later than usual to finish up a project he had been working on. He was hoping to rush home and spend some time with you before you were off to practice for the evening, spending 2-3 hours with your friends and the group.
That didn't happen.
So, when he gets home and you've already texted him saying you've left with a sad, crying face, he's bummed. He gets himself comfortable anyway, heating up a cup of ramen since he's not too hungry. Maybe he'll get some food with you when you're out— it's one of his favorite things to do.
Now, the second thing that makes him a little more irked is the fact that 2-3 hours go by and you haven't texted. He knows practice can run long, but it's also a little unusual for you to not keep him updated. You finally do a bit past 8pm with a quick:
you: hi baby, sorry! practice was a bit busy, i was caught up during breaks. i'll be home soon then i'll come over after i shower, okay? wait for me (: we should go on a food run! hehe
yunho: sounds good, love. i'll be here.
It closes to 9pm and Yunho isn't hungry anymore. The cup of ramen will do since there seems to be a dim chance of getting food with you, especially when you tell him you'll be over in a quick second but you’re still nowhere to be found. Yunho charges to the door anyway and is hoping to greet you when he swings the door open. Instead, he's greeted with you laughing and giggling with Hyunjin downstairs in the lot as he hands you a bag of to-go food.
Let's set the record straight— Yunho loves your friends. He knows he can trust them, and he knows they're all genuinely good people. He's always been happy you had a good group of people around you.
It's just today, he really, really missed you. After a long ass day. And he knows you [and Hyunjin] mean no harm in your actions, but he can't help but feel a tad bit insecure [and slightly jealous] that you aren't rushing over to see him after not being with him all day. He knows he can blame this on the fact that he's exhausted and a little short on patience. God knows he really did try to keep it cool and brush it off.
He couldn't help it.
Yunho shuts the door again, leaving it unlocked for whenever you feel ready to come upstairs and hang out with him. He sits on his computer chair, irritated, and throws on a game to distract himself momentarily. Maybe it'll help ease whatever he's feeling,
But, nope.
It doesn't.
Because when you walk in, you're still yelling out to Hyunjin and whoever before you shut the door, place the food on the counter and walk into his room. You throw your arms around him from behind and Yunho lets out a small, audible sigh. That was already alarming enough for you, but you still dip your head to the side and try to grab his attention.
"Hi." You place a quick, chaste quick to his cheek, but Yunho doesn't move.
"Hey."
"What's wrong?"
"Nothing." Is all he says plainly. "I was just waiting for you."
"I know, but Hyunjin stopped by to give us food—"
"I thought we were gonna grab food together?"
"Oh." You frown because it completely slipped your mind, or else, you would've left the food at your own apartment to save it for tomorrow instead. "Fuck, I'm sorry. I didn't think he was gonna swing by with food. We all left each other earlier without any plans of—"
"It's okay." He taps your arms as a signal for you to let go of him. "You should go eat."
"We can share, there's more than enough—"
"All good." It's petty of Yunho, he knows. For him, it's the fact that you told him you wanted to go on a food run after practice. Another small, but meaningful thing you two did often. He doesn't blame Hyunjin for anything at all, no. There was no way of preventing that, and who the fuck was he to make you reject food from a friend?
He just wished he could take you to get food. Watch you order your favorites and do your happy dance in his passenger's seat. It's another one of his favorite things.
"Yunho." You slowly step aside and sit on his bed, your appetite all of a sudden gone from how distant your boyfriend is being. "I'm really sorry, I didn't mean to make you upset."
"It's fine."
"Is it really? Because something feels off and I wanna know what I did so I can fix it."
"It's nothing, Y/N." You almost flinch at the way he calls you your name instead of his cute endearing nicknames. It throws you off guard so much that you resort to a flimsy, broken:
"Okay." It's barely above a whisper. You stand to head back out to the kitchen, quietly eating a bit of Hyunjin's extra to-go thai food before setting some aside in a tupperware for Yunho and placing it in the fridge. The rest of the night goes.. like that.
In silence. With weird tension.
You hate it.
You wish you could just fix whatever you did wrong, or that Yunho would tell you no matter how 'silly' it may sound. He's always been so good with communicating, even during small disagreements, you weren't sure why he was avoiding it this time around.
You quietly get ready for bed, brushing your teeth and flossing before changing out of your sweats and hoodie to Yunho's shirt. You pad into the room, slipping yourself deep under the sheets and pull up some vlogs on Youtube that you need to catch up on.
"Tired?" Yunho asks from his computer chair, still playing his game.
"Mhm." You look at him, hoping he'd come over to kiss you, cuddle you. Shut off the computer and lay next to you, show you any kind of affection. He doesn't budge, though. You feel your bottom lip trembling, your heart slowly cracking in various places. You have to take a breath to prevent yourself from crying, and Yunho can feel it. He can feel your gaze on him, he can tell you're seconds away from crying. So, Yunho stands and shuts off his computer. But, he starts to head out to the living room and you're on the verge of breaking down. His way of avoiding the issue and getting more upset was to shut down. Deflect.
This wasn't like Yunho at all so you knew something was wrong; something was that bothersome to him.
"Baby." You call for him softly, and he just looks at you. You can tell he's conflicted between keeping this up and dropping it entirely, but it doesn't seem to be enough. It's not enough for him to drop it because his expression doesn't change. He still seems cold, distant. Tired. Unlike the Yunho you're so, so used to seeing and having.
"I'm just tired. Go to sleep."
"Where are you going?"
"The living room."
"Let me come with you."
"Y/N. Please go to sleep. I told you nothing was wrong." You watch the way his jaw slightly ticks before brushing you off completely and leaving the room, shutting the door behind him. A loud sigh escapes his lips as he treads to the couch and plops onto it, leaning his head back onto the edge. He shuts his eyes, giving himself some time to sort through his feelings because what the fuck, Jeong Yunho?
He knows this is much needed, though. He needed to step away for a second to regroup. He doesn't want to unintentionally hurt you by saying or doing things that he doesn't mean. He's tired, and he's acting like a fucking baby because he just wanted you at so many points today— yet, the universe just didn't let him have you. That wasn't your fault.
None of this was your fault.
He needed to do better. Just because he was exhausted, didn't mean he had to act this way towards you.
"Yo." Yeosang walks through the door, dropping his duffle bag to the floor as he steps out of his shoes. "You good?" He furrows his brows at the sight of Yunho just resting his head back with his eyes shut close.
"Mhm."
"Where's Y/N?"
"In the room." Odd, Yeosang thinks. It's not like you two to be separated like this. It's pretty obvious Yunho is bothered by something and that you've probably gotten into a small fight over it. Yeosang isn't one to meddle much, especially when it's not his business to. But, he is concerned seeing his roommate like this. It's probably one of the rare times he ever sees Yunho upset.
"You sure everything's okay? I'm not really used to seeing you sitting out in the living room in silence like this." Yunho lets out a tiny chuckle that's barely audible, but he finally turns to Yeosang and purses his lips.
"I guess. Just exhausted lately."
"I bet. You've been working your ass off." Yeosang looks into the fridge before stepping away with a cold water bottle and heading towards Yunho. "Y/N put some food in there for you, by the way."
"Did she?"
"Yeah. It has a little sticky note on top." Of course you did, why wouldn’t you? You always thought about Yunho no matter what.
"Fuck."
"What?"'
"I've been such a dick to her tonight."
"What'd you do?"
"It's so stupid." Yunho begins to explain how his day has just been all over the place— from work, to staying late and not being able to see you before practice, no updates until 3+ hours after practice, looking forward to a food run that didn't end up happening because of Hyunjin. All Yeosang can do is laugh a bit and shake his head.
"Dude, we all have bad days. It's inevitable. You're still adjusting so don't be so hard on yourself. It's hard going from a routine you were so used to, especially with Y/N. Then, having to switch it up and play tetris with your time. It's not easy. But also, I'm sure Y/N has been feeling the same way. She's just doing what she can to support you first and foremost. She'd never hurt you intentionally, and I know she'd always choose you in the end." Yunho's head drops as he leans onto his knees and sighs again.
"Fuck, you're right. I don't know why today was so difficult. I guess it all piled on for me and I didn't know how to sort through it."
"All good. Shit happens." Yeosang shrugs. "Anyway. I'm gonna head to bed. You should probably do the same. I know she's probably waiting for you."
"Thanks." Yeo gives him a little dap before he's off to get comfy and end his day. Yunho stays on the couch for a few more minutes before he brushes his teeth and washes up for bed. He stands in the bathroom for a few more seconds before gaining the courage to finally talk to you about everything that's been going on today. When he walks in, you're still bundled under the sheets, but your phone is against the wall and a video is playing. He can hear you sniffling through the video though, and he knows you've been crying.
God dammit, Yunho.
"Baby?" You hear Yunho softly call your name as he slips into bed and wraps his arms around you.
"Mhm?" You respond, still facing away from him.
"Can we talk?" You sigh and exit the video, locking your phone before turning towards Yunho and setting your phone onto the table.
"Don't force yourself if you aren't ready to."
"I am, and I'm sorry." He looks at you with those puppy dog eyes and it instantly feels like you have your loving, incredibly sweet and attentive boyfriend back.
"What happened?"
"I don't really know. To be honest, I don't have that great of an explanation. I was just tired and I was really looking forward to seeing you before practice. I couldn't see you then because of work, so I was even more excited to see you after practice and to go on our run together. But, you came later and the whole thing with Hyunjin—" He pauses and shakes his head. "It was so stupid and childish of me. I didn't need to act that way, and I'm so sorry I was such a dick to you over that." You cup his cheek and caress the surface with your thumb.
"You should've just told me, babe."
"It's so dumb, though?" He furrows his brows, mainly at himself.
"Nothing is dumb. Whatever hurts you, hurts me. We're in this together, remember? We're on the same team. I just need you to communicate and be honest, like you always tell me. Okay? I'll do anything to fix it and make it better. I'm your safe space like you are mine."
"I know." He leans into your touch before placing a soft kiss to your palm. "I'll do better."
"We have our bad days and that's okay. It won't make me love you any less. Tell me if you need space or if you need anything from me. I want you to be happy and comfortable."
"I know."
"Okay. And I'm sorry about the food run. I promise I'll keep my end of it next time."
"Wasn't your fault, baby. Nothing could have prevented that." You give him a tiny, toothless smile before kissing the tip of his nose.
"Are we okay?" He nods.
"I'm so sorry. I didn’t mean to make you feel that way.” He repeats before leaning in to peck you on the lips. He holds the kiss before parting and looking you in the eye, brushing the hair away from your face. He dips in for another kiss— this time, it's deeper. More passionate. His hand comes down to the small of your back as he presses against you, slipping his tongue in to fight for dominance against yours. The kiss is so full of love and neediness, but there's no push or pressure to make anything out of it.
So, Yunho continues to kiss you. Pushing up against you ever so slightly while parting from your lips to leave a trail across your jaw.
Your chin.
Your neck.
Back up to your lips.
He loves the way you softly sigh in content, listening to him repeatedly whisper 'I love you' against your lips. Into your neck. Across your jaw. He loves the way you gently bite onto his bottom lip as a way of asking for more. He loves the way your fingers tug on the ends of his hair, the way you press your lips against his cheek, forehead, nose. The way you caress his cheeks and never let him go.
It's amongst the many on his list of favorite things.
He continues to coo you and praise you in between kisses throughout the night, smiling while hearing your giggles and smothering you with more kisses until you find yourself getting sleepy. He holds you close and sings a soft lullaby, playing with your hair as you drift off to sleep with the cutest smile on your face. He can’t help but admire you, fighting the exhaustion that’s been hitting him all week for a little longer. He fights it until he can’t anymore but fuck it, it’s all worth it.
Because sitting at the very top of his favorites list is you.
⇢ permanent taglist: @asjkdk @bintificreads @interweab @svintsandghosts @cheolliehugs
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.˚ 𓈒 ࣪.𝝑𝝔 Royal Rivalries !! ´ˎ˗
Luke Castellan x Fem!Zeus!Reader
Synopsis: you and Luke finally get married to one another
Tag(s): royal AU, arranged marriage, allusions to previous nsfw activities(LOL)
Word Count: 1264
A/N: sorry this took over 2 weeks, I really don't know why it did😭, actually I do know why I was to busy watching Bridgeton, does it show in my writing be honest😭🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻. anyways this ones a little shorter bc it was bothering me on how long its taken me to update this, but lemme stop yapping!!
╰➤ MASTERLIST pt4
It was the day, the day you'd been... dreading? Waiting for? You didn't know anymore. Currently you were laying in your bed in a silk robe with rollers in your hair, relaxing whilst getting all nice and pretty for your big day. While you were thinking about how your wedding would play out, your door opens and your siblings enter the room.
"Happy wedding day," Jason and Thalia cheered.
"Hey guys," you smiled and sat up.
"How you feeling," Jason asked as he sat at the end of your unreasonably large bed.
"I'm about to be a wife, I don't know its kind of weird."
"Are you saying you're not ready to commit to your wifely duties," Thalia joked, the sub context not lost on you. Suddenly you're regretting telling your dear sister all of your business. Ehh not really she kinda funny with it.
"What constitutes as 'wifely duties?'" Thankfully, Jason was oblivious.
"Oh, you knoww-"
"Enough," you shut your eyes.
"Well, we have a gift for you," Thalia said as Jason handed you a box.
"I bought it by myself and Thalia slapped her name on it."
"I don't think the logistics matter."
"Shall we see this gift," you did the grabby hands and opened the box. It was a polaroid camera.
"To document the honeymoon," your sister beamed.
"Yeah!"
"Guys... I don't think I get a honeymoon," they looked at you dumbfounded.
"What."
"To be fair, us getting married was an apology for slapping Luke, so I don't think I get a, um, prize."
"I think somebody already got part of her wedding night prize anyways," Thalia muttered under her breathe, causing you to smack her shoulder.
"What?"
"Ignore our foolish sister Jason."
"Yes, ignore me and my foolish thoughts."
You and your siblings stayed in your room and hung out for a while before your servants came in to help you finish getting ready. They were ushered outside as you were zipped, plucked, and pampered. You were gorgeous, but moving on..
﹒º. ౨ৎ
The wedding was to be held at your estate, per Zeus' orders most definitely. The ceremony was to start at any moment, and once again you were sat away waiting in a room with your siblings.
"I'm still upset we couldn't throw you a bachelorette party by the way," Thalia complained as she ran her fingers through her basket of rose petals.
"And what would we have even done with fathers eye never leaving our sides?"
"I could accomplish anything with nothing but a dream," the three of you chuckled, then began to turn your heads to the sound of the bells, indicating the start of the ceremony.
"Are you ready," Jason extended his hand.
"Never," you chirped, gladly interlocking arms. "But is my flower girl ready?"
"I was born ready," Thalia smiled as she pushed through the doors, littering your path with rose petals.
"Deep breathes little brother, deep breathes," you whispered, not knowing if you were truly talking to the little brother by your side, or yourself.
One thing you were nervous about is not the actually getting married itself, but who would be outside when you opened the doors. You had little, if not absolutely no say in the matter. You didn't know the people sitting in the crowd, the flowers hung around the room, or even the color scheme the room has taken. Though of course knowing your father, it would be white and gold, very Greek.
You were knocked out of your daydreams by a nudge to your side. "It's time."
You nodded as he opened up the door, introducing the two of your... future. Your life, as dull as the statement may seem, was dulled down to a single moment. The moment you were handed off to another man. One you didn't want to marry, but right now, it didn't seem to bother you as much as it did before. Obviously you weren't going to tell that to Luke, no need to inflate his already large ego.
You finished your walk, and Luke is standing right in front of you, taking your hand from Jason as you hugged him off. The wedding went smoothly, though you mostly zoned out as the priest began his speech, only zoning in into Luke's big brown eyes. Ever since the past week together, the tension has gotten thick and even after the day you were trying on wedding dresses, why it has only gotten worse.
You didn't know you craved the feeling of being skin to skin until that moment. You knew doing such actions before wedlock have just as much ruined you, and you know you should care, but you just wanted more. You wanted cake, and now you had it, and you were most definitely going to eat it, too.
"I, Luke, take you Y/N, to be my wife, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part."
"I, Y/N, take you Luke, to be my husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part."
"I do."
"I do."
"You may now kiss the bride."
The two of you moved together with the speed of magnets, how much you oddly missed the feeling. This kiss was different, more tender, less hurried and hungry than the last. You liked it, very much indeed. The two of you parted, breathless, and turned to the cheering crowd (ignoring Thalia's eyes, her knowing eyes, that this was not in fact, the first kiss between the two of you).
Luke held out his arm, to which you interlocked with, and walked down the aisle together. "Told you I knew what would be your dress," he whispered.
"I'm soo smacking you when we pass through those doors," you gritted out through your smile. As you scanned through the crowd, curious on who was witnessing such a moment, you saw many familiar famous except one, the Aphrodite princess Luke went around floundering about with. It made you chuckled, just a little, that your father seems to have lost her invitation.
Now the two of you were behind closed doors, away from the cheering crowd. Only for a short time of course, for there'll be a party later in the evening. "Wonderful acting, it almost seemed like you liked me."
"Oh shut it," you knocked his chest with your bouquet. "Your teasing isn't very husband material."
"And what, prey tell, would be considered husband material?"
"Hmmm.." you pretended to ponder as you brushed your imaginary beard while looking between Luke's eyes. "I shall give it some thought."
He hummed in response as he softly grabbed your hand from your chin, holding it in his. "You're smiling."
You didn't even realize you were, "So are you."
"Why of course, I've just married the most beautiful woman I've ever set my sights on."
You rolled your eyes with your smile still evident on your face. "Why must you insist on poking fun?"
"What makes you thinking I'm jesting," Luke leaned down, close enough for his nose to touch yours. You didn't bother answering before slowly leaning in again. It was a slow and affectionate kiss as he slide his hands down to your waist, pulling you close. You both pulled away, still standing close to one another.
"Shall we make it to the party?"
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SYNASTRY OBSERVATIONS🔥❤️
I just want to give a heads up that I am no professional astrologer.. although it's funny cuz you see most users saying this here and their predictions seem pretty professional in the end no? Lol. Anyways, as I was saying, please don't plagiarise my content..but wait, no, I don't really have a problem actually cause astrology is astrology and if you wanna use it for your posts, fine...feel free to...I have no issue so please widen your knowledge and share it with others. Okay, I think it's best i begin now.
Also, I'll be talking about stuff that are meant only for adult eyes lol😂 so dear minor watching, i understand how curiosity fuels your engine but please don't interact with this, otherwise curiosity will also begin to kill minors along with cats.😂😂
If something here does not relate with your experience, please keep in mind that astrology is an insanely vast but such a beautiful topic so this varies based on other aspects and placements too.
☀️Sun in the 8th house🏠 -
•The sun person makes the house persons insecurities and past wounds exposed due the sun persons brightness, because of this it seems like the sun person hurts the house person unintentionally.
•The house person gets triggered a lot with certain actions of the sun person but keep in mind, the sun person has no intention of triggering the house person.
•These are the triggers that's developed because of the house persons past and it gets exposed to the sun's light.
•No matter how much the house person tries to stop those triggers, it won't stop in the beginning of the connection.
•The sun person might want to explore the house persons deepest parts that they hide from the world and as the dynamic gets closer to eachother in the connection, the sun persons heat either worsens the wounds or helps heal the house person heal them.
•The sun person pays a lot of attention to the house persons deepest wounds and desires.
•They notice every little detail of the house persons insecurities but you'll be happy to know that the sun person usually finds brightness in all your darkest parts.
•The house person will be someone who provides them a shadey place to relax from their own ego and shine. A place for them to dig deeper than surface level.
•The house person gets obsessed completely with their entire soul towards the sun person. It's usually possible that the house person felt an instant pull to the sun person on their first meeting.
•Here, usually along with the above points, manifests in such a way where the sun person wants the house person to be as open and comfortable with them as possible but the house person is too afraid to expose their sensitive hidden parts to the sun person.
8th house synastry -
•i feel, according to my studies and observations that whatever planet sits in the 8th house becomes like a two sided coin or a opposite sort of thinking here most of the time.
•Usually the planet person thinks and feels some way about the house person but the house person feels like the planet person thinks the complete opposite of what the planet person actually thinks (lol I hope it made sense) and vice versa.
•It's like both the house person and the planet person may have similar feelings about eachother (planets depend as it can change this) but they both think that the other doesn't feel the same way about them.
• EX: VENUS in the 8th house - both of them (planet person and house person) love eachothers beauty and insecurities of eachother but they are insecure that the other person does not like it or will not like it sooner or later.
ANOTHER EX: SUN in the 8th house - both of them (planet person and house person) wants the other to open up to them but they think the other person does not want to or will not support them or understand them. Both of them want to open up abt their insecurities but they both are afraid and hence take a long time to open up but in the beginning are closed off.
Btw, I'll be making a list of Eros in the houses and signs in synastry soon.
Eros (433) in 3rd house : Firstly, Eros is your turn ons. The Eros person is turned on / finds the house person voice very attractive. Also the house persons hands, how the house person speaks and their mind.
Eros (433) in 7th house : The Eros person is turned on / finds the house persons feminity attractive. Even the house persons ass lol. If the house person is a woman, then the Eros person finds her feminine body very beautiful.
Kiss (8267) in the 4rth house :
•the house person can be comforted easily by the kisses of the kiss person.
•the kiss person's kisses feels like home for the house person.
•soft loving kisses.
•slow comforting kisses.
•The kiss person can love to kiss the house person's chest.
Kiss (8267) in the 9th house :
• the house person gets very hyped up and excited when the kiss person kisses them.
•the house person feels protected and safe everytime the kiss person kisses them.
•since this is Jupiter's house, the house person may want more and more of the kiss person's kisses. They may also get a lot of kisses from the kiss person. The kiss person may have the urge to kiss the house person whenever they're around around them since Jupiter expands whatever he touches. This holds true if the house person's Jupiter is in conjunct with the kiss persons kiss Asteroid.
•the kiss person can give the house person kisses out of nowhere too.
Vesta (4) is an asteroid that indicates what our soul is most devoted towards, where you're most dedicated, where you invest a lot of your energy. The conjunctions can make this asteroid very prominent in synastry.
= If you want to know if you are going to invest a lot of energy in a connection, check if Vesta conjuncts any of your inner planets, especially big 3 (ascendant, sun, moon) and ESPECIALLY JUPITER.
= Which planet Vesta conjuncts indicates the kind of dedication or the areas in which you or the other person is dedicated towards in the connection.
= EXAMPLE 1 :
•Vesta conjunct Jupiter = Vesta person is dedication to guide and protect the Jupiter person.
•This conjunction makes the Vesta person extremely, I mean superly duperly extremely excessively devote all the energy they have in them towards the Jupiter person.
•The Vesta person surrenders and devotes themselves to Jupiter person as if the Jupiter person were a god.
= EXAMPLE 2 :
•Vesta conjunct Venus = the Vesta person has a romantic dedication towards the Venus person.
•The Vesta person is very much dedicated to showing the Venus person their love.
•This is a 100% loyalty placement in any romantic relationship. Other aspects matter too though but this tops the loyalty placement among many other.
• The Vesta person is usually the one very loyal in this connection but the Venus person loves the dedication that the Vesta person has towards them and this becomes the Venus person's fuel for loving the vesta person in return.
•The Vesta person is devoted romantically towards the Venus person.
= EXAMPLE 3 :
• Vesta conjunct Sun = the Vesta person has an overall dedication towards the sun person.
• This literally means that the Vesta person is dedicated to the sun persons soul.
= EXAMPLE 4 :
This time I'll give an example of Vesta seated in _______ house.
• Vesta seated in the 8th house = The Vesta person has such a deep leveled soul digging devotion towards the house person, especially if Vesta conjuncts any planet here (esp. big 3).
Yay! Special asteroid mention time!!
Vesta ☌ child (4580) -
The Asteroid Child is youthfulness, where your inner child never dies, where you feel a little lost, where you feel like a child.
•The Vesta persons devotion is aimed at making the child person feel like a child.
•The Vesta person invests HUGE amounts of their energy just to make the child person laugh like a child, smile like a child and feel like a child.
•The Vesta person is also devoted to make the child person's inner child never die, to keep their inner child alive.
•The child person can make the Vesta person feel lost at times.
•The child person is lost when it comes to the Vesta persons devotion towards them, especially if Vesta is also ☌ (conjunct) Sun/Jupiter.
•The child person wonders why the Vesta person is so devoted towards them.
That's all for today my dear readers with amazingly curious minds. I hope you all enjoyed reading this post today and I hope I made somebody smile! Let me know in the comments if anything resonated and if you'd like me to cover anything in astrology!! Love you all so much ! Bye bye for now! Take care, be happy and healthy!😊❤️
Asteroids mentioned above : 433,8267,4,4580
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What If - Part 4
Summary: Mandalore approached and you cannot help but feel like something is about to go terribly wrong.
Pairing: alpha!Paz Vizsla x omega!fem!Reader
Wordcount: 6.2k | Rating: E (18+ only!)
Warnings: A/B/O dynamics, explicit sexual content, size kink (Paz is big-big), (semi-)public sex, oral sex (m receiving), unprotected sex, creampies, knotting, cockwarming, dirty talk, praise kink, Angst with a capital A, fluffy fluf
As we say in German “Was lange wärht, wird endlich gut” which is what I am using as my excuse for why this took so long. The truth is: depression is a bitch, real life is a bitch and creativity and time for writing are like the same side of two magnets that do not want to even go near each other. Anyway, we made it!!!
There are a few people I gotta thank for this. First and foremost the iconic, the brilliant @mostly-megan who not only suffers through all the random AU ideas I have (and there are a LOT of them) but also brainstorms with me. The Ragnar Scene and also a very (very!) lovely scene towards the end of this part would not exist without her and for that, I am very grateful. Then, of course, the ever-present, ever-lurking genius that is the Boba Tea Anon who is in the Paz trenches right there with me and encourages me in everything I do (even if it is just a – I promise one day I will do a Lord Huron Paz piece!). Also, a very special shout out to Neyo (@galacticgraffiti) who gave the Mando kids their names, suffers through The Horn Knee with me and is always there to cheer me on. And then, of course, all you Paz girlies (gn) who make me feel like a sane person while I ramble about a faceless man who appeared for a total of 23 minutes (if that) and is – canonically – dead anyway. You make sharing my writing worthwhile in the first place and I will be forever grateful for getting to share my writing with you.
And with that – on to the last part (and the new canon for me lol). Please let me know what you thought in a comment or a reblog!
masterlist | crossposted on AO3
There was a certain impatience to him you had not expected at the last meal. When the announcement came that you were approaching Mandalore, Paz – who had spent the dinner between you and Ragnar – had pulled you into his lap, his arms like iron around your body. Ragnar had wandered off to the front with all the other foundlings, expectantly looking up at the clan leaders.
You had turned your face into Paz’s neck, trying to get his scent on you. You could not believe how you had only known this man for a few days – a week, at most! – and yet his scent was the only thing that seemed to calm you down. And it was no different for him.
The alpha’s hand immediately found your scent gland and you shivered as the soft leather brushed over your skin. It did not take long until he pulled his gloves off, settling them into your lap, before resuming his motions.
The nervous energy in the room was palpable but it was practically radiating off him and it inevitably affected you as well. Where you had been excited, if a bit reluctant, a few weeks ago at the prospect of reclaiming Mandalore, now there was only a strange sense of dread in your stomach. One that even the alpha could not dissolve.
“When you wake up tomorrow, some of us will set foot on our homeland for the first time in too many years,” Briggs announced, his serious gaze roaming over the packed hall, “I cannot promise you it will be easy. I cannot promise we will all wake up to the sight of Mandalore. But we will die trying.”
You could see Ragnar looking back at his father who tilted his head. A gesture meant to be reassuring but only resulted in you questioning whether Paz would be one of those dying. You shifted nervously, causing Paz to tighten his hold on your waist.
“Calm down, love,” he rumbled quietly behind you, “It will be alright.”
Forcing yourself to nod, you gripped his large hand tightly, trying to burn into your brain what it was like to touch him,
“Rest well and rest assured that tomorrow will mark the start of a brand new era,” Briggs raised his glass, “And let us toast to our home!”
“To our home!”
Everyone lifted their glasses and the conversations resumed, a constant background roar that reminded you of the countless fates that were tied to the success of this mission. A strange feeling started in your chest, and not the kind that Paz’s presence usually caused.
You shifted again, watching as the crowd dissipated and the foundlings were walked off to bed. Their excited chatter moved down the hall and something cold clenched your heart when you watched Ragnar wave at his father.
Immediately everything quieted down. With everyone returning to their own conversations and the hall being considerably more empty now, Paz did not waste any time. His hands landed on your thighs and you managed a wobbly smile.
“What is going on in your pretty head?” he asked you, his fingers skimming over your thighs, “You’ve been squirmy all evening.”
“Who says something is on my mind?”, you popped a berry into your mouth, grimacing at the sudden sour taste.
“True,” he laughed, “You might have just spent dinner thinking about when you can finally sit on my cock again.”
“Paz!” you gasped, “you cannot – I mean – what if –“ You glanced around with flushed cheeks, relieved to see that no one had seemed to hear his indecent theory.
He laughed again and the sound made your heart and body melt. “I will never tire of making you flustered,” he murmured, his big hands pulling you closer, “Though I actually would not mind having you cockwarm me tonight, sweet omega,” his fingers brushed the underside of your breasts and you shivered, “I would be lying if I said I could ever get enough of you.”
“I actually had something similar in mind,” you admitted shyly, slipping off his lap and enjoying the way his hands followed you and his body leant into you. As if he wanted to keep touching you, as if he never wanted to let you go. Your heart skipped a beat and you smiled.
“I … would like to try something?”
He leant back, his legs spreading with the movement and your teeth dug into your bottom lip at the sight of the obvious bulge in his pants. “Oh yeah, omega, and what would that be?”
You made a few steps away, making sure that your robe (a dark blue, just like his armour) swished around your form as enticingly as possible. Paz’s head turned to follow your movement from your place in front of him to a chair in a dark alcove, dressed in shadows where you knelt down right in front of it.
The big alapha hummed, rising to his feet, knowing exactly what it was you had in mind. “I think I can get behind that idea.”
From the other sounds that were floating through the cantina, you knew that illicit things were already well underway. Most of them likely more graphic and adventurous than what you had in mind. Still, you felt a little nervous at the prospect of sucking Paz Vizsla’s cock.
But for some reason, this was exactly what you needed. You wanted to bring him pleasure, so much pleasure.
You watched as he pulled off his cape, folding it expertly before motioning for you to stand. He dropped it on the floor, his hand steadying your elbow as you sunk down on the soft fabric. “Don’t want you uncomfortable,” he announced, before sitting down in the chair.
He looked big like this, bigger than usual. And oh so confident it already made your panties wet. His knees spread, the trunks he called thigh caging you in and you watched with bated breath as his fingers undid his codpiece, expertly freeing his cock.
He was already hard and dripping precome, the knot at the base slightly inflated and you squeezed your thighs. It was not like you had never seen his cock before and it certainly was not as if he had not fucked you before. Yet, the sheer size of him and the thought of taking him in your mouth overwhelmed you a little.
Where were you supposed to start?
But when one big rough hand closed around his shaft and Paz started to jerk off right in front of you, you could not help but to simply … dive in.
Opening your mouth as far as it would go, you closed your lips around his tip, one hand struggling to fit around him. The grunt he let out, paired with a twitch of his hips, had you smiling around him.
“Stars above,” he cursed, “Warn a man next time, won’t you, love?”
You looked up at him, teary-eyed, while your tongue licked the underside of him. Or at least the part you could reach. He was heavy in your mouth, heavy and big and he tasted of something that made you want more. Slowly, you moved forward trying to take more of him but soon enough, he bumped something at the back of your throat and you sputtered.
Before you could panic about breathing, Paz had pulled out of you, his large hand cupping your cheek while the other was still wrapped around the base of his cock. “Deep breaths, omega,” he soothed you, his hand leisurely stroking himself, “You are doing so good for, trying to take it all.”
“You’re so big,” you marvelled, wrapping your hands around him, “I want it all, alpha, I – Paz, I really want it all.”
“Want my help?” he asked, “Might have to be a little rougher, though, sweet omega, and I can smell how much that turns you on but I need you to tell me – Are you sure?”
You nodded eagerly, darting your tongue out to lick at him. “I am sure, alpha,” you murmured, pressing a kiss to the tip, “I promise.”
“If it is too much, tap my thigh three times, understood?”
You nodded again, shifting on your makeshift pillowed. Your thighs were already drenched at this point and you wondered whether you could come just from sucking him off. It seemed like you would be able to do a lot of things when it came to Paz.
His grip on your face loosened just the tiniest bit. “Open up for me,” he ordered, pulling your face towards him, “There we fucking go. Gorgeous.”
“I will never tire of this sight,” he groaned, “You struggling to take my size, trying to be so good for me,” he shifted, his hips surging forward and you smiled with pride when you did not gag this time, “Can I go deeper, love? Is that okay?”
With your position between his legs, your jaw wide open around him, you could not really nod. But Paz seemed to recognize the excited twinkle in your eye because you could hear the grin in his voice when he muttered a “Stars, you’re perfect.”
You took great care to keep your breathing even and through your nose, experimentally swirling your tongue around him every time he pulled out of your mouth. His thrusts grew heavier, his hold on you tighter and you swore you were this close to coming just from the sheer sight of his shaft covered in the sheen of you.
It was not long before he came in thick spurts on your tongue. You struggled to swallow it all, your throat working overtime as you did your best to swallow around him. “Good girl,” he praised you, “My good fucking girl.”
Your heart jumped in your chest as you licked him clean, not quite ready to let go of this intimacy.
His hand came to your chin, gently scooping up some of the come that had spilt from your lips. “Here you go,” he offered his coated thumb and you sucked the digit into your mouth without hesitation. You could never get enough of his taste.
“Let’s retire for the night, love,” he suggested, “We have a long day ahead of us.”
*
By the time you got settled in your bunk, you knew it was only a few hours before everything would start. Before you had to say goodbye.
Paz had excused himself, leaving you to get ready for bed alone before he appeared by your side, dressed completely in his armour.
“Are you okay?”
“Said goodbye to Ragnar,” he explained, sitting down on the little cot, hunching his shoulders over so he would not hit his head.
“Oh.”
Somewhere behind the curtains, someone snored.
Paz grunted when he laid down, his giant arm reaching out and pulling your back to his front.
“Is this okay?” you asked quietly, “It’s a tight fit.”
“It’ll be okay,” he murmured, grunting when he pulled the curtain closed, “I will not spend my last night without my calmer.”
“Aren't you uncomfortable?” you asked, your voice small, “With – with the armours and me and all the …”
“I will not spend my last night without my calmer,” he repeated, leaving no room for doubt. It took a bit of shuffling to turn you around but when you finally were facing him, you already felt much better. You tucked your face into his neck, breathing in his scent as he wrapped both arms around you.
Your heart was squeezing so hard in your chest that the emotional pain became physical.
What if this was his last night? What if you would never see him again?
And what if you did? Would it ever be like this again? Would he want to keep you as his calmer (or more?) when Mandalore was finally reclaimed?
Paz shifted, his large hands running over your back until one settled at the back of your neck.
“I got you,” he rumbled, “You’ll be safe, omega, I promise.”
You swallowed away the need to tell him that it wasn’t your safety you were worried about.
*
The next morning was worse. It barely qualified as morning and you were sure you had not found any sleep. You had just been shifting all night from side to side, desperately burying your nose in his neck to soak up every little bit of his scent that he could give you.
You were not sure if Paz had slept either but when the alarms sounded in the room at the same time, it took him a minute to get up. Everyone was shuffling around the packed room silently, most of them already dressed and armoured. Ready to descend to the surface of Mandalore.
Despair was clawing at your insides. You felt like you were watching something from the outside that you knew would fail. That you knew would destroy everything you held close to your heart.
And yet, you watched helplessly as they lined up, preparing to board the ship that would take them into the atmosphere.
It was silent – eerie – as if everyone knew something big was about to happen. And you couldn’t move from his side. You couldn’t even if you wanted to. You needed to be here with him.
You watched as Paz double-checked his weapons and your mouth quirked up as you remembered how the man had seemed like a weapon on his own the very first time you had seen him. And how true it was, now that you saw guns and rifles packed to every piece of his armour that could carry it.
Your smile fell just as quickly as it had appeared. Would this be the last time you got to see him?
You had been scared a lot of times in your life. Like when your parents had taught you how to swim and you had been convinced you would sink to the bottom of the sea. Or when you had taken a bad fall in one of the hiding places and scuffed your knee. But that childish fear of creatures and heights was nothing compared to the existential dread that settled in your stomach.
It wasn’t fear that something could go wrong it was fear that you knew something was going to go wrong.
And could you really risk this?
“You, uh, you will come back, right?” you whispered, already hating how needy you sounded. But you needed to hear him say it. You needed Paz Vizsla’s words to be the ones to tie you to the hope of a future together.
“Someone already scared for me?” Paz tilted his head and while you knew this was supposed to be a joke, his voice did not sound very light. Like he knew it too. That feeling.
“Well, I mean you have Ragnar,” you shrugged, pulling the cloak closer around you, “And I mean your tribe needs you, you are a great warrior and –“
“Exactly,” he interrupted you gently. You watched as he approached you, his steps heavy and measured and you swallowed. “I am a great warrior,” he repeated with his fingers under your chin, tilting your head up to look at him, “Which is why I will come back to you.”
“But –“
“Listen to me,” he whispered, his hand cupping the side of your neck, scenting you so gently your eyes fluttered close, “I vow to the stars, I will come back to you, love.”
That was the last thing he said to you before he boarded the ship.
*
If somebody asked you what happened during the time you were waiting, you would not be able to tell them. As soon as Paz embarked on the with the scouting group, it felt like time stood still. You barely knew what you were doing. You were pacing the entire length of the ship it seemed, Ragnar keeping you company for a few of those pacing trips before he distracted himself by playing with the other foundlings.
You tried to approach your feelings rationally. You had spent a lot of your time these past few days in close proximity with Paz. He was an alpha, you were an omega, obviously there were some biological components that could have contributed to your feelings for him.
But that was exactly it. Your feelings …
At the thought of Paz not coming back, it felt like your heart ripped into two. You could not fathom a world without him in it and, more importantly perhaps, you could not fathom your life without him in it. You wanted him to come back and when all the tribes settled in their parts of Mandalore, you wanted to be as close to him as now. You wanted to spend your evening with him and Ragnar and you wanted to know what his days were like, what his role was in his clan.
Whether he wanted to keep you in his life as well.
Waiting was pure torture. Communications were cut and all that remained was the cold silence of the ship. You avoided the cockpit and strategy meetings, Briggs (thankfully) seemed to understand your reluctance and did not press you on the matter. Until Axe Woves came to warn the ship of the Imperial that had settled on the planet and the fight that had broken loose.
That was the meeting you had insisted on attending, hoping that – in whatever capacity – the stoic alpha might drop some comments about the people on the surface.
“Is,” you swallowed, “Is he well?”
The beskar-clad man, much to your frustration, said nothing at all.
Which was not very helpful.
The fight continued and troops were dispatched and you stayed, keeping the foundlings safe and quiet. In fitful dreams, you heard yourself confessing your love to him just before he disappeared never to return again. You woke up with cold sweats until you crawled into his bunk, pressing your nose into his pillow and willing yourself to think of a future in which he came back to you unharmed.
Sometimes, you could hear Sluice and Chants converse about what to do if it all failed. Whether to settle back in Nevarro was another possibility or if the tribes should stick together to find a new home.
All you could think was that you would not leave Paz on this planet.
You could not leave him.
It was morning when the announcement came. You had buried yourself in his cot, his sheets pressed to your nose as you took trembling breaths when the PA system stuttered to life, the mechanical voice echoing through the empty hallways.
You had retaken Mandalore. The air was breathable and you could safely land on the surface to meet the victorious troops.
The joy and excitement that spread through your entire body could not be described. Nothing could happen to wipe the smile off your face as you frantically searched for the one good dress you wanted to wear when you saw Paz again. You wanted to please him and kiss him and tell him you loved him. And maybe, if you were very lucky, he loved you too.
Stars, how you hoped he would.
But that elation stopped short when you set foot onto Mandalore. You could not even look at the surrounding landscapes, the fallen home of your ancestors – when you spotted the group but no Paz. A quick glance around did not reveal him either and suddenly the feeling of dread was back again.
Briggs was standing there too, and you knew the man long enough that when you saw his eyes getting glassy at your sight, he did not need to say anything anymore for the tears to fall.
This was it then.
You always wondered what it would feel like to live with a broken heart. Now you knew.
The pain in your heart was unbearable and you suddenly wished that you had never left the bunk this morning. That you were still curled up in his scent and his blankets without the knowledge that the alpha you wanted to spend your life with was dead.
“Where is my buir?” Ragnar asked somewhere behind you and you could hear it in his voice. How he tried to sound strong but he was just a child. A child without his father.
He made his way to the front and stopped by your side. You put your hands on his shoulder.
“I am sure he will be fine,” you assured him, not believing your own words, “He – he must have … another mission somewhere, right?” you looked to Axe Woves who avoided your gaze, “Right?”
Ragnar grabbed your hand. “Bu said if he is late, I need to distract you.”
“What? Why?”
“Because we're family,” he said it so effortlessly, “and because I know he will come back but you might worry and you shouldn’t worry.”
You were not sure what happened first: the stopping of your heart or the break in your breath. Paz told him you were his family? Ragnar considered you … his family?
“Do you wanna play a board game?” the boy asked and the breath rushed back into your lungs, “Bu taught me a few games for when I wait for him to come back.”
“He did?” you asked, your voice faint as you followed him back to where someone had set up a small open-air cantina at the ramp of the ship. You ignored the looks Briggs and Chants gave you. Ignored the way that Bo Katan bowed her head as if to pay respect to you as if you had something to mourn.
Not now, you told yourself as your heart cracked in your chest. Maybe tomorrow you could bury yourself in Paz’s bunk, breathing in his scent until there was nothing left but your own grief.
Tomorrow, you promised yourself, Tomorrow I will know he is dead.
*
The sun was setting over the mountains and Ragnar made no sign of stopping the game anytime soon. He had patiently explained the elaborate card game to you before dealing the cards. And then he had continued to play with you the entire day. Sometimes, people joined you for a round or two. The first had been Din Djarin – the man with the green baby. He had not said anything but you could feel the sadness coming off him in waves.
Then there had been The Armourer who had stayed for only one round, occasionally speaking to Ragnar about his helmet ceremony (the first having been interrupted only a few weeks prior). She was followed by Sluice, Bo Katan and finally, Briggs.
“Mind if I join?” the older man had asked, only sitting down when you nodded.
“Not at all,” Ragnar spoke up, relieving you of the to find the energy, “Do you know the rules?”
Briggs had left after two rounds, his warm hand on your shoulder the only indication of what he had come here to say. My condolences for your loss.
The tears had burned hot in your eyes but you forced yourself to keep playing. Ragnar won most rounds and the one he did not, you were fairly sure he lost on purpose. “No worries,” he assured you with childish wisdom, “Sometimes it takes a little longer to get the rules.”
“That is okay,” you forced yourself to smile, “How about we take a break for some food?”
“Good idea!” the boy jumped up, “I will get some of the berries and you stay here and watch the cards!”
Before you could protest, he had raced to the small buffet table.
You both welcomed and feared the moment of solitude this afforded you. It allowed you to take a deep breath, to let your shoulders and your guard fall. Maybe even a few tears if you were quick about it. You did not want Ragner to see you like this. He seemed to be determined that his father was alive and well – that he would return – that you could not bear to be the one to break his heart.
“Bu!” Ragnar shouted and you whipped around immediately. It took you a moment to find Ragnar but when you did, he had his arms wrapped around the legs of a large man. A man dressed in dark blue armour.
“Paz,” you sighed, feeling tons lighter. Ragnar threw himself at his father who caught him though you did not fail to notice the way his legs almost buckled.
Stars he was hurt.
A new wave of panic washed over you and you did not realise you had stood up until the stoll toppled behind you. Several pairs of eyes were on you but you only cared about one.
Paz set Ragnar down and whispered something to him. You watched as the boy nodded, skipping off to Din and the Armourer. And then Paz walked towards you. Though walk seemed too weak a word for the way his heavy steps came closer and closer, his looming figure soon right in front of you.
Paz was right in front of you.
“You,” he growled, taking your hand without slowing his stride, “Come with me.”
“Paz, what happened?” you asked, trying to look him over, “Are you hurt? Did – Were those Imperials we spotted on the radar? Axe Woves and Briggs and – oh stars, we need to get you checked out and wait – are you bleeding? Where does it hurt maybe I can –“
A door swished open and you glanced around in confusion. This was not the infirmary. This was not even a proper room if the cleaning supplies on the shelves were anything to go by.
“Paz, you need – oh!” your hands gripped his shoulders tightly when he lifted you onto a surface. Was it a table? A counter? Stars, you could not bring yourself to care. Not when he was standing in front of you, panting like he had the fight of his life behind him.
Which he probably did.
Your heart clenched again, from fear or joy you could not tell.
His large hand fiddled with your dress and with a rip, your entire front piece was hanging off you in tatters.
“Alpha,” you cried, moving your hands from his shoulders to his chest, “Alpha, are you all right? I was so worried.”
The big man stepped between your open legs and you took a deep breath. The smell of adrenaline burned your nose but you could not help but notice the arousal that was in the air as well. He was angry and determined and the way he did not even look at his hands when he tugged on his belt made you glad you were already sitting down.
“Keep calling me that and I will be,” he grunted, opening the snaps of his armour and finally his fly.
Your eyes were fixated on his hand around his cock. “Pull down your dress,” he instructed instead, “I want to see your tits.”
You hurried to do so, almost ripping the fabric entirely in the process but you could not care less. Not when you had your dream of an alpha standing between your open legs, getting ready to fuck you. The ruined fabric pooled around your hips and the cool air made your nipple pebble. But then Paz was right there, the bulk of his body between yours and you could feel his cock against the inside of your thigh.
He pushed the tip of his cock against your folds, slowly circling your clit and you whimpered. Why did everything he did feel so good? “Ready?” he asked, spreading your wetness around and you found yourself wishing that you could see. That you could see how big he was against you, how his hand gripped himself, how his brows might furrow in determination and the set of his lips as he pushed inside you.
But you could not have everything in life. And for this moment, the feeling of his cock stretching your walls was enough. He was here, he was alive and he made you feel so stars forsaken good.
“Fuck,” you sighed, “Paz …”
“That’s good, huh?” he grumbled, slowly pulling out before pushing back in. You could feel your walls ease around him, your juices covering his shaft and the gland on your neck pulsed with the need to have him scent you.
He remained still for a few moments and you took a deep breath, breathing him in again and trying to get yourself to realize that he was alive. Your alpha was alive.
Paz started to move, then, and slowly pushed inside you again before building up a steady rhythm that had him deep, deep inside you. And all you could think, between bouts of pleasure, was that he was alive. Paz was alive.
“Fuck,” you whispered, your hand shaking as you gripped the edge of the table, overcome with emotion, “A-alpha, I was so scared. “
A particularly hard thrust had your hands fly around his neck. “I was protecting you,” he replied, his voice shaking, “You were never in any danger, omega, I would not allow it.”
“I wasn’t scared for me, you di’kut,” you cursed as you hastily wiped away the tears streaming down your face, “I was scared for you!”
Paz grunted at your admission, pushing inside you again and pulling you as close as he could with the armour in the way. “And I was scared of never seeing you again,” he confessed into the darkness between your faces, “That I was breaking my promise to you.”
“Wh-What,” you gasped, feeling his cock grow inside you, “Alpha, what is happening?”
“Oh fuck,” he grunted, “Sorry, ‘mega, sorry, I didn't mean to – oh shit, love, you gotta stop squeezing me.”
Easier said than done. In fact, it seemed impossible. Because as soon as you realized that it was his knot swelling inside of you, all you could think about was what it would be like to be knotted by him. Which turned you on beyond belief.
The mental image of him filling you up to the brim, the giant size of him staying inside you, made your walls flutter and your high approach so much faster. Paz’s movements did not stop and you could feel the ring at his base growing and growing, catching on your entrance with every thrust and making you yearn to keep him inside.
“Alpha, will you – Can you – oh!” he hit that spot inside you again that made your blood sing and you fell back against the wall, completely at his mercy.
And then the light went out.
Your body tensed with fright and you squeaked, thinking something had gone horribly wrong. But Paz did not seem deterred and you faintly remembered that the light switch was somewhere on his side of the room.
There was a sound you could not pinpoint, followed by a loud clatter and then his hand was at the back of your neck, pulling you to him and you squirmed at how he folded you in half, his cock still nestled deep inside you and then he was … kissing you.
You gasped, the feeling of his lips familiar against yours and everything you had dreamed of.
“Fuck it feels good to fill you up,” he murmured, the praise making your cheeks warm.
Your legs were still trembling around his hips and you tightened your hold around his neck. Your nose bumped against his scent gland. Add that to the feeling of his smile against your shoulder and even retaking Mandalore could never rival the feeling of being scented by him.
“That good, huh?” he teased you, his lips moving against your skin.
He had some stubble that tickled your sensitive skin and you gasped, the sensation opening you up even more.
And then he pushed inside you one last time as you came around him. The knot at his base swelled with no signs of stopping, locking you together as he filled you up. You shivered at the feeling of him twitching inside you, spurts of come filling you up in a way you had never experienced before, increasing the pressure inside you that made your walls clench. He continued to rut against you, causing your clit to rub against his pelvis again and again, prolonging your peak.
After what felt like an eternity, you came down from your high, relishing in the feeling of him still pulsing inside of you. It was strange, something you had never experienced before, but the closeness made you sigh contentedly against his lips.
Paz was quiet save for a few grunts, his hands grabbing your hips, keeping you as close as possible.
“I’ve never been knotted before,” you admitted between kisses.
“Really?” Paz asked, his mouth pausing on yours, “How does it feel?”
“It feels kinda nice, alpha,” you whispered, pulling his face closer to yours again.
Paz did not say anything for a moment, his laboured breath loud in the small room. Then his hands cupped your face and you could feel his eyes on you and you wondered if he was able to see you despite the darkness. Probably not, after all, it was his visor that usually enabled him to do so. But he made you feel seen with how his thumbs brushed over the apples of your cheeks, still wet with tear tracks or how his lips softly landed on yours.
“I don’t think I told you yet,��� he said against your mouth, “But you are beautiful. To me, you are the – the most stunning omega I have ever seen. When I was down there – when I … I dreamt of what it would be like to see you with my own eyes.”
A flutter started in your chest. An awful flutter of hope that had you thinking of futures beyond the next few days. He could not mean what you thought he meant, right?
“But you helmet –“ you started, trying to rationalize away the hope in your voice.
But Paz had other plans. “I want to court you,” he said, sounding as determined as ever, “Stars, I want to properly court you, love, whatever that entails for your clan but I asked Briggs and –“
“What?”
“I wanted to make sure that I did everything right,” he explained, his hand warm on your back, “So I asked him about any customs I might have to know, that last night before we left and – and for a second there it looked like I would never get to ask you. But I can, love, I can ask you now. Will you let me court you, ‘mega? Will you let me spend the rest of my life with you and Ragnar and all the other foundlings the stars let us have?”
“You – you want children, too?” you asked, feeling like the breath was stolen out of your lungs, “M-more than Rganar, I mean?”
You could feel his smile against your neck, the tip of his nose buried in the valley beneath your ear. “Course I do,” he confirmed, “Ragnar is the biggest gift of my life, I won't say no to that joy again.”
A laugh bubbled up in your chest and you could feel your walls clench around him. Paz moaned, his cock twitching inside you. “Is that a yes, then?” he asked carefully, his hand wandering up to cup the back of your neck. He moved away from you,
“Yes,” you breathed out with the biggest smile on your face, “Yes, Paz.”
The scent that surrounded you made you euphoric and you realized that it had been Paz all along. That sweet scent that made your heart beat faster and a smile appear on your lips? Paz fucking Vizsla.
“Open your eyes, mesh’la,” he asked you quietly, his breath warm on your face, “Look at me, sweetheart.”
And you did. Your eyes blinked open and it took you both an eternity and a second to get your eyes used to the seemingly blinding light of the storage room. But then your eyes met his and you saw Paz Vizsla for the first time.
He had dark eyes, just like you had daydreamed, and his hair looked just as soft as it had always felt. It was matted to his forehead in places and he looked … exhausted, like he had not slept in days. There were bruises on his cheekbones and you could see some dried blood and dirt on his jaw. But all of that was overshadowed by the brightest, biggest grin on his face.
It made the corners of his eyes crinkle and you could not help but smile back, absolutely in awe of the man in front of you. What were you supposed to say the first time you saw the face of the man you had fallen hopelessly in love with?
“You are handsome,” is what you settled on finally, carefully brushing your fingertip over his crooked nose.
He huffed out a laugh, his eyes twinkling with mirth. “Thank you, my love,” he rumbled and your heart skipped a beat at him calling you his. Because you were, truly, whether you had realised it before or not, his.
“I love you,” you blurted out, feeling oddly shy.
“I love you too,” he murmured, pressing a soft kiss to your lips, “There is no version of this life in which I do not love you.”
“You will have to tell me about your scars,” you whispered, your eyes roaming over his face, catching on one that cut through his eyebrow, “Every single one.”
“I will,” he promised, kissing you again, “We have a lifetime for it.”
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