#bvs verse (irons)
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{FROM HERE} @dontcxckitup
Gareth is definitely not happy. Alfred throws the bag full of clothes and washroom stuff into the backseat of the car and slides into the driver's side attaching the phone to the hands-free and pulling up directions to the hospital.
"Alright, I'm on my way, we'll deal with that when we come to it, I just need to know one last thing, I know you don't like them so do you want me to get you out of the hospital today, I just need a yes or no I can explain more when I get to you?"
It had been a long time since Alfred had seen the inside of St Thomas, he hoped the entrance to A&E was still the same.
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Bruce: DON'T DO SOMETHING ILLEGAL...
Jason: Your no fun...then what am I supposed to do huh?
Alfred: It's only illegal if you don't make it legal before doing something that was illegal...
Jason: Huh...never thought about that
Bruce: ALF YOUR NOT HELPING!
Alfred: Who said I wanted to help...I'm your Butler my job is to be of service and I was simply answering Master Jason's question
Bruce: By telling him to make something that is illegal, legal, in order to do it?
Alfred: Yes and note I'm not telling him how he can make such a thing that is illegal actually legal to do, I'm just saying there is always the possibility of doing so...
Bruce: But wouldn't it be illegal to make something that is illegal, legal?
Alfred: Not if you make it legal to make something that is illegal...legal...
Jason: My head hurts
#mr007pennyworth#bvs verse (irons)#ooc; cackling at myself#batman family#Alfred Pennyworth#Bruce Wayne#Jason Todd
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☠️🤣🤣🤣
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Alfred: "You are aware, the 20 mcNugget box is supposed to feed four people?"
Bruce: "So? I'm batman, I'm better than four people"
*shoves another whole nugget in his mouth*
Alfred: "You ordered four boxes?"
Bruce: "And?"
Alfred: "That's the calorie serving for sixteen people?!"
Bruce: Alf?
Alfred: "What?"
Bruce: "Do I look like-*eats another nugget* -care?"
Alfred: *sighs* "No"
Bruce: "Then shut up"
#mr007pennyworth#bvs verse (irons)#batman incorrect quotes#batman#alfred pennyworth#ooc; this just happened between a teen and his dad and all i could think of was alf & bruce lol#ooc; man ate two full boxes and took the other two home
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@thedickgraysonrp , starter call meme, 🌷 (soft starter)
[starter] @thedickgraysonrp
Alfred had been watching some rather dull documentary on fishing in his pyjamas when he heard a knock on his bedroom door.
He glances at his watch before looking at the door. 1am.
"it should be open..." he calls. He'd get up to open it but he'd already got in bed and taken off the prosthetic leg.
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The new lights on Wayne Enterprises have given Gotham a very aesthetic look this morning. It's 9:30am. The weather is so bad today it's making it look like it's 9:30pm already.
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Rare Sunday Gareth, working from home on a weekend because we have dinner reservations for Tuesday night and he knows I'll pop his balls if he cancels on a date night that had a two month waiting list. @dontcxckitup
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At least once a week while in squads:
Alfred: Gareth, No.
Gareth: *does something stupid*
Alfred: *sighs and grabs a medical kit*
At least once a month (30 years later):
Gareth: Alfred, No.
Alfred: "I'm perfectly fine"
Gareth: *has to dial 999*
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Mid morning walk before I start cleaning the house after Christmas
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🍻
Alfred had been looking for Gareth for over half an hour, finding him drunk he approached slowly with a bit of concern, they'd been together most of the night until he wandered off.
"On a scale of one to ten, how drunk are you right now?"
@dontcxckitup
#mr007pennyworth#bvs verse (irons)#dontcxckitup#[v; give me one more night to ruin my life again army days]
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"You are my home, Gareth"
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Husbands ❤️ A & G. @dontcxckitup
#mr007pennyworth#bvs verse (irons)#dontcxckitup#ship; alf x gareth#queued and dangerous#(edit is mine; actors are not sadly lol)
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