Summary of art 2023!!!! (Template by ArielDrawsDragons) In which I have fudged the dates even more then I did last year to get the shit I wanted on here! But! Who cares ghghg-

Anyway, yeah! I did a lot, LOT of traditional stuff this year… basically completely shifted to only traditional art w some Digital Touch ups. Cuz my brain decided I hate dealing w my laptop ghgh, I wanna try and get back into digital art more in 2024 but! Either way! I think this year went very good art wise! I’m happy w it!

don’t think I’ve put any of my zosan doodles on here before bc im shy but it’s mostly a lot of the same

people acting like twitter's new post count is gonna cause a mass exodus to tumblr.... this website's demographic has not changed in 865578 years and it sure as hell won't now. this is the site for people who were weird and unhappy in middle school. everyone on here has either been around since they were weird unhappy 13-year-olds or joined when they were weird unhappy 13-year-olds, left because they thought they were normal for a while, then came crawling back again when they realized deep down they were still weird unhappy 13-year-olds. what does this site possibly have to offer you if you grew up happy well-adjusted and unaware of homestuck

ND-5 & tags

sharing a single halo

🎶

office au nonsense aka i can’t believe this was the first time i drew legato LMAO

i think my style is shifting these days away from what ppl usually recognize it for but that’s ok with me

a lot of the habits i picked up that looked nice aesthetically were rlly hard to replicate bc my foundations wereeee SUPER WEAK (ie faces… ppl compliment them but i promise u i used to only post the ones that turn out nice and that’d be like. 10% of the time. and it’d take hours)

i’ll b a lot happier being able to consistently draw Nice faces quickly and repeatedly rather than one WOWWWW face every 3 years, yk

ok. so.

vista

fearne: *is an Animal* imogen: *Gives Scritches*

some thoughts about astarion because i'm tired of the internet reducing him to one thing

when bg3 came out in early access, astarion was always seen as the extremely flirty, confident guy who enjoyed sex (or so we thought) and spoke about it like it was his favourite thing. he was also kinda marketed as the “sexy vampire”, so you can understand why many people saw him that way based on the little amount of content we had. even while playing act 1 and act 2, many players still might think of him like that because he does have a very charismatic personality and he asks to sleep with you very early on, so it just automatically makes you think he’s genuinely happy doing that and being totally serious.

BUT!!!!!!! we end up finding out later on that’s NOT the case and it was all part of a plan to seduce us in order for him to gain protection. he opens up about his past and his trauma and how he was forced to use his body to lure people back to cazador. he struggles with intimacy and relationships in general because of this. that’s why i really hope that people stop reducing him to “hot sexy vampire that loves flirting and having sex with everyone” when that is not who he is, he’s literally traumatised because of sex due to being forced into it and he’s slowly trying to heal. he’s also so much more than just “the hot vampire”, ya know? if you actually put in the effort to get to know him, you will see who he truly is underneath and he has many loveable traits to appreciate.

you may not see the “soft” side of him very often because he hides it, but it’s there!! one thing i noticed that really stood out to me was that when i gave food to an orphan in act 3 and he approved. back when you first met him, he probably would’ve done the opposite or had no reaction at all. i also saw a clip of someone trying to romance karlach and astarion and he literally told tav to choose karlach over him because he can see that karlach loves her. he said normally an arrangement would work for him but after everything karlach has been through, he doesn’t want to get in the way or see her hurt. letting tav go is also hard for him as well but he still thought about someone else. he could’ve whined or been possessive or jealous but he didn’t do that at all. where are all those people who reduce astarion to “the guy that flirts and sleeps with everyone” now? seriously. that’s not what he does, and when he was forced into it by cazador, he was trying to survive, he didn’t do it for his own pleasure. it’s not a “hot” personality trait of his, it’s literally trauma. and because he did it so much, he got used to it, and that resulted in him disassociating and feeling empty.

apparently if you ask him to join you and sleep with the drows at the brothel (something i will never make him do in my playthroughs), he only says yes because he struggles to say no. but he disassociates. and if you’re in a high approval relationship with him and he loves you, he will feel safe enough to express his feelings and say he’s not comfortable. this happens before you fight cazador. i’m not sure if he gives the same response after, but either way, if he joins in, he will always disassociate and it’s not something he wants to do despite what he may say.

that being said, it’s obviously still okay to appreciate his beauty and attractiveness, because he is very beautiful. he appreciates it and even likes being called beautiful. calling him “hot” and “sexy” isn’t a bad thing either, we know he can be and i'm sure he knows it too! it’s just annoying when people act like that’s ALL he is and they don’t even mention anything else about his character. the love scenes are beautifully done too (i personally prefer the second one after you’ve stopped him from doing the ritual, because that’s the one where he decided he truly wanted it and felt safe and comfortable because he genuinely loves you), and i actually would’ve been fine if they didn’t have any scenes like that at all because it’s totally understandable and valid if he didn’t feel comfortable, but i just hope that people don’t take things too far and over-sexualise him just because of how he appeared to be in the first half of the game and the way he’s often marketed on social media. and yes i know he’s fictional and nothing on the internet is going to hurt his feelings!!!! it’s more about the fact that he canonically has sexual trauma and many people still say really disturbing stuff even AFTER they find out about that, and it just makes me uncomfortable to think that people are okay with treating someone like a sexual object especially when they've said they're traumatised and it makes them uncomfortable. idk if this makes sense 😭

but yeah he doesn't want to flirt and sleep with everyone as i've seen people claim. and if in an alternate universe he did, and he did it on his OWN terms, and the other people he had relationships with enjoyed it too, then good for them! absolutely nothing wrong with that if there's consent, respect and honesty. however, that's not the case with what happened with astarion, because 1. he was forced into using his body WHEN HE DID NOT WANT TO and 2. he misled people and lured them to a miserable fate. it's so horrible and devastating for everyone involved. sex was never something fun for him, and it certainly isn't a "personality trait" of his. it was a survival tactic. he was forced to. he didn’t want to.

obviously when he becomes more comfortable, then it's totally understandable to get excited when he flirts and shows physical affection. he can be so charming, funny, sweet and romantic and i love that. it’s so beautiful to see him heal, genuinely find comfort in someone for the first time and experience intimacy that he feels ready and comfortable for. he deserves to love and be loved on his own terms instead of being forced. but again, he is so much more than the guy we were introduced to at the beginning. the internet just sees one thing and sticks with it but i really hope people start to actually appreciate him for who he is and the complexity of his character.

aaaaand i just had to leave this here <3

idk how experimental you can say this really is for me but it's a new reshade and skin details so this counts <3 anyway yesterday i wrote down an idea for a short story and it's one bullet point and it says "a rockstar picks up a homeless hitchhiker in the 70s. something homosexual happens" and that's the whole thing. the rockstar 👨‍🎤

arasol is just bouba x kiki

day 14

yea

Odile patting Molly Epithet Erased on the head, you know why

have two bc i care them