I hope that when ppl view my account and talk to me online, they view me as just another person with feelings and thoughts, and acknowledge that I am no better or less than anyone else just because of things like follower count or the fact that I create art. I hope that people know that my opinions change and that I am as capable of making mistakes as anyone else and I sincerely hope that everyone takes all my advice and opinions with a grain of salt because in this vast expansion hellhole we call earth, I am just another person with no real importance and I am no one to tell you how to live your life, and you owe it to no one listen to me or like me or even care about me

hi hi hi!!! so i just recently hit 800 n i was going to save this for my 1k celebration, but genuinely i am just full of so much love for everyone that i couldn’t hold myself back from doing this so !!!! appreciation post for mutuals!!! n this is absolutely wild to me, bc ive been on tumblr for over 4 years now, n remade this blog at the end of september to both restart and because i was getting super into mcyt n wanted a blog to focus on that, and the fact that ive grown this much since then is absolutely insane to me!!!

im feeling full of love for all of my mutuals (aka people i consider my friends <3) so!!! have written messages for u all :DD i mostly wrote them for people i talk to a lot/look up to, so pls dont feel bad if i didnt write one for u!!!! pls absolutely follow everyone in this list they are all amazing people n deserve ur follow !!!! obs not a complete list bc bad memory but just. they are all so cool :]

also thought i would say this here but im moving blogs lol im @sapienap (wont let me tag bc new </3)

atlas ( @fear-epidemic ) atlas!!!!! oh my god okay so first off??? the fact that our friendship began bc of u thinking my icon was dan howell when it was mr. wilbur soot is sucha  cursed fact n i think that describes us very well <3 u r genuioely (i refuse to fix that mistake) such a nice person n uve just listened to me ramble about the weirdest shit n sat there as i watched anakin skywalker be hot n helped me with characterizations n i cant thnak u enough for that!!! ily <3

azzie ( @thediscsaga ) azzie azzie azzie!!!!!! the fact that we became friends bc u looked at me n just decided to call me ‘bestie’ n now here we r is so MINDBLOWING i love you so much!!!!! u r genuinely one of my bestest friends even tho we dont talk as much n i lov u sm ur always there to support me with whatever i do!!! ur always so supportive n i just. i lov u sm !!!! ur one of my favorite people n make this hell site so much better !!!!!! if im being honest lowkey anytime i lowkey feel panicked i just go to ur blog bc it honestly calms me sm :]

beet ( @homophobicpunz ) beet!!!!! okay okay okay the fact that the first time i saw ur main’s user n instantly was like “ohmy god i love that” n now here we r???? friends??? n i get to call YOU my friend??? amazing oh my god. and the fact that uve dragged me into so much shit that i lov now bc of u??? also amaizng. i just love the fact uve dragged me into So Much stuff (daredevil n all of those shows, punz, n more!!! like lowkey darth maul but only lowkey as i ahvent watched the show hes in yet dsjf) n uve honestly been so supportive of me throughout eveythting n just !!!!!! i cant think of much more to say other than ily :]

cam ( @camdotcom ) cam!!!! oh my god okay i jsut. honestly ur so nice ????? anytime im down u always manage to send an ask whenever im not feeling great n always send me smth funny n it always makes me feel so much better!!! ur genuinely one of the best people i know!!! ur always so great at everything n u genuienly make my tumblr experience so much better !!!! ur always such a great person :] n ily !!! im also ur little brother so <333

clay ( @its5undy ) tubs!!!!! my fellow southerner !!!!! im so so happy ive gotten to knwo u !!!! all bc of our weird ass server!!!! i lov u sm!!!! ur one of the brightest people i know n im so glad to have u be someone who forces me to go to sleep when i feel tired instead of encouraging me to stay up <3 n ur so cool !!!! u may not think it bur ur absolutely one of the coolest mfs on this dumb app <33 ur alos my older brother so u cant say anything bad about me Ever

daniel ( @rvnboo ) dan !!!! my sweet homie !!! oh mygod i do not remember how i met u at ALL bc my memory sis o bad but i am so glad i knwo u !!!! i get so happy every single time i get an ask from u !!! u r such a nice persobn n a great joy !!!! every single time i see u on my dash i go “:DDDD daniel!!!!!” anytime i see u in my notes i just go “!!! dan!!” honestly i associate ranboo with u now!!! i see u n go “! dan!!” n i just lov u sm??? i honestly think of u as my younger sibling n i just lov u sm

dream ( @enderrdream ) bad!!! omg ok honestly i dont remember how we met bc ur Old (/j) but seriously!!! ive been friends with u for So Long (even tho i lost u for some time) n now!!!! we r friends again!!!! n ive claimed u as my older brother !!!! we r the only valid sbi dynamic <33 but truly!!! i think u r one of the people i have known the longest!!! u ahve done so much for em n i can never thank u enough!!! i just lov u sm !!! im so horrible at explainging this but just. i love u sm <333

gogy ( @strawberrygogy ) berry!!! oh my god the fact that i ahvent known u that long buit we r so close??? we have a ship that can rival dreamnotfound n have matching cases we r the only bicthes on this entire site <333 people that send weird asks after me being trans have No Bitches KFDHYGGH but seriously !!! im so fucking glad i got to know u!!! the fact we became friends bc i saw ur account, n foudn out u read the serpent king???? that is WILD to me!!! we r Bestest Friends n i fuckign love that and our 420 mile separation <3333 i lov u !!!!!!

hari ( @netheritedream ) hari hari hari !!!!! heblo heblo!!!! god the fact that we’re in different timezones n never get to talk is so homophobic i cant believe time /j but seriously!!!! i cannot believe we never get to talk we r platonic soulmates n i can barely count the amount of times we have talked the last week </3 and the factt hat u joined n saw ME n thoguht “ah, yes. friend.” n now??? we r platonic soulmates !!!! n uve helped me make so many new friends n have even closer friendships !!! n im just. i love you so much im so glad to have you as my friend <3

jannat ( @technosoot ) maya !! my memory is so bad i cannot remember how we met at all but !!! i am so fucking happy i became friends with u !!! u r genuinely such a bright part of my life !!!! i see u n go “:DDDDDD JANNAT !!!!!!!!!” u r such a great person n i will alwayts be here for u !!!! i love u so much !!!! my brain has stopped workin but i just lov u so much omg !!!!!

may ( @notfoundgeorge ) may !!!!! omg okay honestly i look up to u so mjch!!!!!! ur one of my favorite gifmakers on this entire app!!! genuinely ur such a nice person???? n if im being honest???? i got So Happy when u followed me back !!!! bc im like. ur so cool n i was like “wow SHE followed ME??” n just!!!! i lov u !!!

rain ( @theartofmining ) rain !!!! oh my god okay ur one of the few people that have seen my fucking. chaotic side which id ont truly think many people have seen so im glad u have that honor <3333 but seriously i lov u sm shfhgfhg u were tehre as i. hitpost limit and ask limit in the span of less than a hour n u rlly encouraged me when i freaked ouytndjfghgj u ahve been there for me for So Long and i just !!!! lov u sm

roni ( @youngjustices ) roni !!! ive known u for so long n even tho i truly havent gotten to talk to u much, i lov u so much !!!! uve been so kind to me n have helped me with so much n i just. i love you so much !!!! ur such a great person n deserve everything in the world n even tho u r taking a break from mcytblr, im just !!! ok lov u sm

sakshi ( @prettyboydream ) smiley !!!!! ok first off: i wish u were getting cuddles. okay next i cannot beleieve that we r friends !!!! i ddint spell that right but ANYWAYS u r so mf cooler than me!!!! one of the coolest people on this entire fucking app !!!! i do not know how i became ur friend but im so fucking happy i am friends with u !!! ur so great and i just. i love u sm

sam ( @dogboyurahara ) league !!!! i am. god im so glad i became friends with u !!!! u walways come n say some of the weirdest shit but that is literally. the highlight of my day i just love you SO MUCH uve always been so kind to me and i just !!!!! i lov u so mcuh !!!!! ever since becoming friends with u ive rlly discovered myself n i love that fact kdhjgfghggh ur always so nice n just. i lov u sorry i say that so much

techno ( @karda ) TECHIE!!!!!!! TECHIE OH MY GOD IDK HOW I TRICKED U INTO BEING MY FRIEND BC UR GENUIENLYT!!!!!! SO COOL!!!! UR SO TALENTED!!!!! n now!!!! im friends with u!!!!!!! im ur little brother !!!!! n ur my older brother !!!!!!! n just !!!!!!!!!! i love u so mich !!!!!!! ur always so supportive of any and everything that i do !!!!! u always offer to do thinsg for em n just !!!!!! i lov u so mcuh!!!!! u always make me so happy bc i see u n im like “:DD thats techie !!! thats my brother !!” n i just. lov u sm

theseus ( @clownspartys ) tommy !!!!!!!!! tommy oh my god i ahvent known u that long but???? we r best bros??? we r the coolest mother fuckers???? we jsut!!! clicked !!! n its so easy talking to u!!!! we just go n YELL at each other in discord n i think that is very valid of us!!! u truly are one of my favorite people on here !!! anytime i see u im so happy to see u n im just !!!!!! i lov u sm !!!!

wilbur ( @pigstepmp3 ) fundy !!!! oh my god okay genuienly. i love you. ur so supportive of me n anytijme im always down ur there to call me bubba n pull me right back up !!!! anytime anythign happens ur always there like “u absolute buffoon, i lov u sm” n i just!!!! i lov u !!!! ur my older brother n have helped me so much i just love you so much <3333

n then for some other cool people you all should follow :]

@pvnz / @gogyapologist / @fruitbur / @technoblaed / @dreamsclock / @dreamnap / @wooteena / @timedeo / @dreamsmp / @sootwilbur / @wilbysoot / @nickwilding / @jschlatts / @helenspirals / @darkmttrcat / @dreamwastakenalt / @hearty-an0n / @lesbiangogy / @imgns / @dogboykarljacobs / @berenstein / @tommylnnits / @dreamslikeshoney / @enderanboo / @veel556 / @raining-acid / @stick3rzzz / @moo-moo-meadows / @dreampfp / @eret

Simply unexpected prt.28

At around 5pm Julie comes in to prep for night shift. Her and her husband take over on weekdays whereas me and william typically run night shifts on busy or weekend nights. She walks in her mixed silver and purple hair pulled back into a ponytail. “MOM!” William squealed from the back running forward tackling her with an obnoxious hug. She brushes him off and looks around the building “What did you do?” she questions him grabbing her apron from behind the bar. He sits on the bar table, and she turns to me giving me a soft warm hug, “oh Mabel I am so glad you handle him in the morings.” she laughs releasing her grip than looking up and over at the table Grace is typing away at. “Is that the drunkie from the other night?” she looks at me. “No, that's Mable’s lady friend.” William pitches in from the background. She squints,pushing her lips, her tone in question, “no.. I think that's the same girl.” I laugh, “She.. She was having a rough day, she's actually really cool.” Julie’s eyes narrow down and stare into my soul, my nerves jump. “So you guys are friends now?” My cheeks feel warm, “yeah.” Looking over Grace is obviously working.

Julie's face went from questioning to a devilish smile, “ Oh really? well, she has good taste in art. I’ll give her that.” Confused, I raise my finger weakly in question, “huh?” Julie points to the back wall I had painted my first few years of being here. “She came in Gawking over your wall. I told her it was you and looks like she snuffed you out quick.” I pause looking over at her watching her write. I hadn’t noticed but she placed herself directly facing my painting. I look back at Julie who is giving me a side eye. “She liked my art? You told her I did it?” Julie nods, “of course kiddo! I tell everyone that's your art and you should have seen her. She choked when I told her it was you I had no Idea you guys were friends.” Embarrassment and slight anxiety filtered in my stomach. For some reason I craved her approval and knowing that she's seen my art and knows it's mine… makes me feel vulnerable, I’m now open to her judgment. It wouldn't be so bad if Julie didn't say “EVERYONE” even those who didn’t, liked my art. Something so dumb to worry about, but suddenly I felt naked.

I snap out of my thoughts to a small thump on the bar top, “ Hey!” I turn and Grace stands there, eyes glittering with a bright smile. “I don’t mean to bother you guys, but..” She paused looking down at Julie's chest searching for a name tag. “Uh- Julie?.. I just wanted to say I’m sorry for the other night and I thank you for helping Mable get me home.” Julie nodded with a smile, “No problem!” she waves her hand loosely. “I assume you and our “sweeeet Mable syrup are acquainted?” She asks, giving pouty lips, pinching my cheeks with her fingers. She acts like a second hand mom attempting to embarrass me. Grace nods hoisting herself up onto the bar stool, “Oh yeah! I wouldn’t say she's sweet though,” She smirks giving me a quick wink then bursting out to a small chuckle looking back at Julie.

It’s clear she's picked up on the dynamic me and my boss share. “Ahh, I see she's given you some of her attitude too. Yeah she can definitely be an ass when she needs to be.” Grace laughs, “tell me about it, I’ve only known her for a few days and she’s already given me hell.” I shake my hand forward, making myself a part of their conversation. “Hold on you deserved it! I wouldn’t just give you hell for no reason.” Grace laughs leaning forward on the table, her shoulders press forward shedding exposure to her cleavage. My eyes drift down spotting small bits of glitter that sparkle tastefully among her fair sink and three white gems pierced into her skin. I panic and quickly shoot my gaze to the ceiling. “I never said it was for no reason, I also never said I didn’t appreciate it. I thank you for being exactly who you are.” Her eyes lay softly in my direction, she looked up at me with an admiral smile, she made it seem like there was no one else around to even distract her from me. She made it clear that she was looking at who I was; even though she barely knew me.

No one had ever looked at me like that before. I Nod, “well, I can’t be anyone else. “ a nervous laugh falls through my lips as she stands from the stool hoisting herself off with a little jump. “Well It was nice seeing you guys and thank all of you for letting me be here.” She pauses and looks around, gripping her laptop and Jacket to her chest. “Is it okay if I come back here to write again during the week?” This was clearly a question for Julie but I answered first before even thinking. “Yes!” She makes a small dancing wiggle and jumps in excitement, “thank you!” and walks out the door. Immediately I can feel eyes drilling to the back of my head. I had some explaining to do.

Simply unexpected prt. 28

The bell dings letting us know someone has left the building. And I turn to a crossed arm Julie and a cockheaded William. They have the same green eyes and both penetrate my soul. Sweat dripped down my neck. “What was that?” Julie raised an eyebrow. Laughter breaks from Will, “You think that was a trip, you should have seen her all morning! This bitch didn’t yell at me once! And she broke the cup. Not me.” Julie begins to laugh, clapping her hand on my shoulder, “our Mable baby finally has a crush!” I step back, placing my hand over hers. “ Jules,” I take a deep breath, “it’s not that serious. She’s cool, she’s cute… but. She’s… a friend.” The words scrape my throat like glass as they slip from my lips, friend. Will jumps off the counter. “ Mable you beautiful dumbass, that… is a crush. Mom has it right, she may be a friend now but, play your cards right and there’s potential.” He winks, “do it fast or I’ll take her.” Without a second of hesitation I shove his arm. “ Hell no!” Embarrassed, I pull back. The thought of her and William made my heart cringe. “No she’s gay, and besides you have Dom.” His emerald eyes roll to the back of his head and his posture drops. “Dom… is crazy, I love her but she tried to buy another damn cat! I said no, it was this whole big deal and now we're not talking… AGAIN!”

The shift of heat made me relax. “ cats are cool though. You know next week you guys are gonna be all over one another again.” Julie shakes her head in agreement and we spend the rest of our shift talking about nonsense town gossip. As we talk Graces eyes stay firmly planted in my head. Not just her eyes but the way she looked at me in that moment. Something about seeing her relaxed, interacting with more than just me drew me to her even further. She was a light I wanted to be surrounded in. I was a sunflower craving her rays of warm sunshine. It drove me crazy, yeah you see a cute girl you shoot your shot. But this, this was more than a shot fired this was a connection something I felt so suddenly. I can see she’s wrapped in personal history and written with stories that I wanted to read, I just want to know her.

My thoughts wander until the end of my shift and I hit the minimart before heading home, I used up the last of my chicken at Grace‘s house. It doesn't take long before I’m greeted by frantic waving hands to my face. “Mable!” My name yelled and elongated with exaggeration. I place my hand to the center of doms forehead as she leans forward into my palm pretending to march forward and fight me. Rolling my eyes I laugh, “what has gotten you riled up?” She drops her arms her posture following, “you didn’t tell ANNNYYYTHING!” dropping my hand I step back, “huh? What do you mean?” She crosses her arm offended, “the girl! You better thank me for saying yes by the way.” Confusion drew itself all over my face, “What are you talking about?” She frowns her brows and looks down, now confused as well. “She came in today and asked me yes or no to going to see you at work! Did that not happen? Is she just a creepy stalker and I fucked up?” She begins to panic. Finally I realize what she is talking about, “Oh… I assume you ran into Grace?”

Her hand shot up pointing her finger at me. “That's her name!” she paused, “long black hair, kinda scary but in a good way?” I nod my head and laugh, “yeah, that’s Grace. She’s interesting, that's for sure.” Dom sighs and walks with me down the issal to the frozen chicken. “Mable… that’s it? ‘She's interesting?” come on, there has to be more than that.” she waves her hands as she talks and I look down at my choice of dismembered chicken carcass. I make my selection, “there is. There's actually a lot, she's more than just interesting. She’s complex there's layers that are bare and open for everyone to see but impossible to peel back. She’s… stressful.. And I like it.” Dom steps behind the counter scanning my chicken. “I feel like stress isn’t the word you are looking for.” She hands me my receipt and I lean onto the counter. “No, it’s the right word, I can’t ‘not’ think about someone I barely know.” I cup my head into my hands, “It’s dumb, It’s a dumb crush thats going to be over in a week, i’m boring and shes… chaotic, I mean you’ve seen her. Shes probably only interested because im the only other lesbian for miles.” Dom wraps her blond hair into a large messy bun,” Orrrrrr, you just over think. This is the first time I've EVER seen you try for anyones attention. Most of the time you try not to be seen or when you are noticed, you... kinda lightly slam them into the floor with a blank stare up and down and a ‘no thanks’. She laughs, “it’s kind of savage i’m not gonna lie.”

Heh, “I guess you’re right. I’ll text you when I get home alright.” She rolls her eyes, “fine. Don't over think! Love you!” I walk out the store and get in my car, how was I not supposed to over think? Ding! My phone buzzed and I looked down and the light up notification.

** Simply unexpected episode 29 UP!**

“Damn. She writes fast

The Shoulder Touch

Peaky Blinders

Isaiah Jesus x female! reader

Warning: none 

Specifics: romance, comedy, fluff, one-shot, race neutral reader, based on a movie, gifs

People: isaiah jesus, tommy shelby, arthur shelby, michael shelby, john shelby, finn shelby, bar woman (oc)

Words: 2,399

Summary: isaiah jesus meeting you for the first time since you moved to small heath, he does the hey from spider man into the spider verse.

Authors Note: hey...so this is not an au its just like based, gave me inspiration for this fic. this is my first peaky fic so im sorry if i get some things wrong or somethings just sound stupid ur girl far from perfect. isaiah is actually one of my fav characters and miles i love him with all my heart and soul. if u havent watched spider man into the spider verse pls do urself a favor and do that rn. if you want to be tagged or request anything peaky blinders pls do loves. also this was not requested. 

(not my gif! do not own!) 

You were from London. Your whole life was rooted there, family, friends, every thing you’ve ever known. When you became of age to make decisions for yourself you moved to Small Heath. Every one you knew thought of you as crazy, insane to make a move to number one some where you didn’t quite know and number two  (hEhheEHEehEHe im immature) some where unfortunately was more poor than you were accustomed to. You wanted to move there to find your independence. You wanted to find a simple job and live a simple life with just you yourself. All your life you were shielded away from almost everything, just once you wanted to see what the world had to offer. 

But who knew it would be this hard!

“I did not realize it was going to be this bad looking.” You complained to well a goat. You were currently making your way on a boat to Birmingham. Seated with yes some passengers and also some animals you could see the shore nearby. “Well its now or never thats what I always say. Thank you for keeping me company friend.” You stood up and patted your skirt. Anticipation easing within you as you glance at the unknown. 

You got off the boat and set to your new life. Yes there were some characteristics different from London but you learned to look past them. You peered down at the letter your boss had sent you. You were to start work the next day. You were a journalist, writing was your passion and seeing as this area was not so big as London than maybe you could gain popularity here. 

“Its a good dream to have y/n,” you said to yourself as you headed to your apartment. 

The whole day was about putting your little items you had and sticking them into your small apartment. Then since you needed food to you know live you set on going to the market not far from your living space. The day was set then with buying new outfits for your job. You did want to look spiffy! (girl thats me i wanna be spiffy naw no sticky cuz im thicccc like skippy) 

Towards the end of the day you already had your dinner and decided since it was your first night here to have some fun. You made you way to a pub nearby called The Garrison. As you made your way inside you saw the majority of the people in there were...bad. You were not used to seeing these types of people. Deciding to just try to enjoy your time here you make you way to the bar. 

You scanned around as you sat on a stool. Every one was mingling and you were the only odd ball. You crossed your legs all primp and proper and awaited service. A unknown woman came beside you to order her drink, “whiskey.” You admired how she looked, you could tell she knew her stuff. She seemed from around here. Her dress showed cleavage and as you peered down at your dress you thought that for this setting you needed to be a bit more out there. You examined her outfit and then yours and compared to hers yours looked like a little girls dress. You tried not to make it so obvious that you were copying her. You opened up a few buttons and awaited for her to leave to order. Your accent seemed even different from every one else’s. “Yes can I please have a whiskey as well.” You were clueless! You had never drank in your life so this was new, you just imitated what the other woman did. As you got your drink you took one tiny sip and almost spit it all out. The taste was very strong, you tried not to choke so as not to make a show. As you just endured the time there you could feel eyes behind your back. 

You secretly wanted to see so you tried to look back quickly but you were too quick about it, you didn’t even get a glimpse. You could see from the corner of your eye them still staring. “What in god’s name?” You cursed under your breath as you stumbled off the stool, not knowing it was that high from the ground. Proudly got your drink and strutted to the group of men looking at you. 

“Is something the matter men? I have seen you all staring at me for the past hour now, care to explain?” You sassed to the group of (delicious sexy men called the peaking puffin blinders DUHHHH) men that wore nice suits. There were a couple of them, some of them wearing the flat caps. There was a man with a neat hairstyle and a mustache, another man with his cap crooked eyeing you up and down like you were the prey. Another man with the lightest blue eyes you had ever seen, a young one with broccoli looking hairstyle (im srry finn’s hair looks so stupid!), another young one that was handsome, and another young one but he looked the most different from every one. He was dark skinned, he caught your eye. All the men looked at you sexually but all you could see was the young dark man staring into your eyes. You took a gulp feeling the bashfulness creep up on you.

“Sorry you just seem you’re not from around here,” spoke the man with ice like eyes. 

“Well, you are right about that. I am not. I’m from London...actually.” You tried to sound ferocious but that just made them like you more. 

“Really, London? We just were looking at you because well love you look so alone and a beautiful girl should never be alone. Names John.” He stood up and gave you a hand shake. They all introduced themselves except the one man you actually wanted to get to know. 

“My name is y/n. Hey you, you didn’t say your name. Whats your name?” You smiled at him. You could tell that he was getting nervous and a bit bashful as well. He gulped and Michael had to nudge him to get him out of his trance with you. “Right well um, my names Isaiah.”

“Oooh Isaiah, what a beautiful name.” Isaiah thought his name sounded way more beautiful when you said it. 

They all could feel the tension and the atmosphere of you two. Arthur coughed in order to break the awkwardness. 

“May I sit?” You found the courage to ask as you stood there holding your drink. John and Arthur were about to go against you but Tommy and Isaiah both in unison stood up for you and said yes. “Why thank you.”

“So y/n, what do you do?” The raspy voice of Tommy came out. 

“I’m a journalist. I love writing about the news and really I do enjoy just writing. It is my passion.” You took a sip of your drink and almost made a face of disgust. (omg i think i made that face now lol i just put in a jolly rancher but the apple one) “Wow this is strong indeed. How can you all drink that?” You cough into your hand and Arthur and John pat your back to steady yourself. 

“You’re drinking the wrong thing love,” Tommy says as he hands you a glass of what their drinking. 

“Right.” You brace yourself and take a huge gulp of the drink. You start coughing again and you can see that Isaiah is worried about you. 

“Too strong for ya,” John laughs with the others. 

“Nope, its truly delicious.” You hide yourself under the table for a second and try not to barf, “that was truly disgusting.” You whisper only to yourself. 

Isaiah appears, his head under the table, “you good love?”

“Am I good, well that drink was surely not but I think I can manage. Thanks.” As you lift your head up you’re greeted with his face close to yours. “Oh hello there, Isaiah.”

Michael then went under, “um what are you all doing down here? Are we having a party?” You chuckled and got back up from under the table. 

After having time to talk to the men and having a good chat you stand up and stretch, “well I think this is where I should part, it was lovely meeting you men and thank you for the drink.” You put money on the table but Isaiah puts his hand out to stop you, “no need. It was on us.”

You grinned at Isaiah and made you way to the exit but as you walked outside you heard the pounding of foot steps behind you. “Wait y/n!”

You turn around to bump into Isaiah, “whoops, yes?”

Isaiah was out of breath but he stood up straight and looked around shyly. “I was wondering, would you like to meet me here tomorrow? Just me and you, no one else?” 

“Just you and me?” You pretended to give it some thought, “of course.” 

Isaiah gave you a lovesick grin but then shook it off and pretended to be this tough guy, “alright, see you then.” 

You walked out of plain sight and Michael came out, “look at you, you really like her a lot don’t you?”

Finn stepped out to greet Isaiah, “look at him. He’s already in love.” They both made fun of him and Isaiah shook his head, “you bastar*s.”

Isaiah’s P.O.V.

The date was tomorrow and Isaiah felt clueless about what to do with you. He was nervous. 

“I don’t know there’s just something about this girl Michael. She’s different and I really like her.” Isaiah explained to him while him and Michael and Finn sat in the Shelby Parlour. 

“I’ve never seen you this nervous for anything,” Finn raised his brow. 

“Look I know you’re shy, I sometimes get like that with me girls but you need to only know one thing in this life,” Michael instructed him, placing his hand on Isaiah’s shoulder. 

“I’m all ears.”

Michael chuckled, “do you know about the shoulder touch?”

“What? I mean of course I do, but um explain it to me again. I must of forgotten.”

“Right. When you see y/n tomorrow you waltz to her and with a dashing smile you put your hand on her shoulder and give her a sexual face saying, hey.” Michael did that to Isaiah and it took everything of Isaiah to not laugh at his friends face.

“Are you sure about this?”

“My friend its biology. Every girl, including y/n you do that to will fall at your feet.”

“So like this, I just go to y/n and say...hey.”

Michael shook his head, “no its like this...hey.” His voice became deeper. 

“Heyyy,” Isaiah’s turned his voice deeper imitating Michael. 

“No, hey,” Michael did it again, smooth. 

“He-ey,” Isaiah’s voice cracked as he tried to be as charming as Michael. 

(not my gif! do not own!)

“You’re ridiculous mate,” they all have a good laugh about it. “But you can do this, even though you’re a little rusty in some areas we believe in you.”

Finn gave Isaiah a freckled smile and nodded.

“Then I’m ready.”

End of Isaiah P.O.V.

As you entered the pub your eyes searched for the handsome face of Isaiah. You subconsciously pull your dress down and swash away any imaginary lint. Biting your lips in nervousness you spot Isaiah. Feeling all giddy you motion to him with a skip to your step, your giggle like music to his ears. You wave to him with a, “hello there.”

Isaiah sees you and with a shy grin he hands you some flowers, “these are for you.”

As you grab the bouquet your hand lightly touches Isaiah’s hand. He coughs awkwardly and you gasp in awe at the beauty he has given you, “my word Isaiah these are extremely beautiful.”

“Yeah, I got them because they remind me of you.”

You knit your brows and give a oblivious look, “oh, in what way?”

Isaiah gulped, “they are beautiful just like you.”

You laughed at his cheesy pick up lines, “Isaiah you flatter me too much, but I should say the same about you.” You come in contact with him and get as close as possible. “You handsome man.” With a leap of faith (YASSSS SPIDEY REFERENCE FOR DAYS LOSERS ITS ALL JUST A LEAP OF FAITH PEEPS) you placed your delicate hands on his chest, the fabric of his suit and his body making your cold hands warm. 

Isaiah was having a nervous break down. He was trying to find what to do next with you. “The shoulder touch!!!” He thought as he pushed you back. 

“Umm?” Was all you could mutter when he awkwardly, but you can tell he was trying to be smooth, placed his hand on your shoulder, “hey.” His voice deepened.

You sucked in your lips and tried to understand his motive, “um...hi?”

The breath that Isaiah was holding finally came out and he look defeated, “I’m sorry love. I’m trying to be this tough man but truly I’m not when I’m with you I get nervous and shy like a little school boy. Look what you did to me y/n.”

You made an evil grin and pushed Isaiah on the booth. Cautiously, you sat on his lap, the end of your dress pooling around his thighs. “So I make you nervous?”

Isaiah looked like he was well lets just say bust a nut. His heart was hammering so hard and fast, with a quick nod you got your answer.

You crossed your arms, “you’re so cute! You make me nervous and shy as well Isaiah Jesus (take the wheel) that makes me feel that you actually care.”

Isaiah sat up straighter, holding your waist against him so you wouldn’t fall. He placed your hand on his chest, “you feel that gorgeous? That’s what you make a man that ain’t scared of nothing do.”

“Funny our hearts match, its like they’re dancing.” You gave a quick peck on Isaiah’s cheek and sat beside him, holding his hand. 

Isaiah felt now more at ease with you, rubbing his calloused hand against yours, “you’re something else y/n.”

You laugh, “you too lad!” You placed your hand on his shoulder, “I just wanted to say though...hey,” you deepened your voice.

Tag list: @harrington-lover, @angelgl16, @perfectlybeautifulsuit, @hyehoney, @haven-prelude (wont let me tag), @leasly, @totally-alexa21, @creamy-pasta-boi, @multireese, @fanfictionrecommendations-com, @prentisskelley, @malereaderforkpop (wont let me tag), @guardian-of-cookies, @justafangirl-97, @teenageshitposts (wont let me tag), @andreaoreas, @dippergravity (wont let me tag), @some-booty, @fromfoolishpeopletodeadpeople, @collectiveyou, @wtfisalltherandoms, @fangirl-4-life415

wanna be tagged in my crap? comment!

Hello! Just about to sit down and read your newest fic, so excited about it! I had a question for you (you very well may have answered this already, so sorry in advance!), but do you have advice for writing? Advice in terms of getting start, plotting out stories, helping get the creative juices flowing? I have all these ideas but seem to lack the drive to get things written out. I know the best advice is to just write, but I'm having a horrible time starting. What do you do in those moments?

Hello my dear!

Sorry for taking so long to get back to you. The lord has blessed me with a head cold and ruined all my plans of productivity for the day, so I can finally answer this ask! I’ll talk a little bit about both how to get started with a story and then some little things that help me motivate myself.

I have started a tag for writing advice here: http://deniigi.tumblr.com/tagged/writing-advice

This is going to be a long post, sorry mobile users.

I am going to preface all of this with the understanding that I am technically a professional writer in terms of like, a handful of ways, but I have absolutely zero training in creative writing, so take everything I say with a grain of salt!

So, I personally find that, on the whole, that psychological hurdle of getting started comes a lot from the anticipation of the kind of response a story will get (how many hits, how many comments, how many kudos) in addition to a bit of anxiety or fear over  theloss of sustained interest in that story (by yourself and/or by your audience). I find that this can be alleviated by really, truly internalizing the understanding that you are allowed to write your work however you damn please, for whoever you damn please.

There will be work you write for others, and there will be work you write for yourself. Not all work needs to be published; sometimes, it is really nice to just write shit for yourself; it is a plus for humanity if you decide to share it with others, but you do not have to do that.

Furthermore, I would like to present you with this:

This is what my current folder for under fire looks like. And you might notice that there are almost always multiple drafts per chapter. Yes, I did in fact rewrite chapter four 5 fucking times, you bet your ass I did. And I’m not ashamed of it. I think the story is better for it. And that’s the important thing here: you do not need to produce a perfect draft the first time around. You will not produce that perfect draft. Accept this. Embrace this. Embrace it and your cat at the same time to really ingrain it as a warm, fuzzy feeling.

Liberate yourself from the pressure of needing to produce the perfect, most right draft and you may find starting the piece overall to be a much easier, more pleasant experience.

And along with this beautiful, uplifting spiritual advice, I also bring a practical thought: when it comes to getting started, a lot of times, people feel like they need to set the stage, yadda yadda yadda. Ha. No. Fuck that.

That’s a surefire way to bore the shit out of yourself. Start right in the middle of a scene that captivates you if that’s what you want to write. It’s a free platform. No one’s gonna arrest you if you stick Spiderman upside down in trash first thing. They might even applaud you actually, because you didn’t make them slog through some of that ‘It was the evening of the 25th and it was cold out in the streets” bullshit we all learned from Dickens.

Alright. Now let’s talk about actually getting started making words appear on paper.

So, from my knowledge there are generally two ways that folks write creatively. You have what I’m going to call the planners and then you what I’m going to call the monsters (I call them this entirely affectionately, I’m sure there’s a better word for these folks, but I don’t have it atm, all I have is a headcold). Planners are folks who sit down and work out their major plot points, who write outlines, and who create the scaffolding of their work before they set out on their magical journey. I think of these folks as architects.

And then you have the monsters and these are those fuckers who just sit down and write stream of consciously like the heathens all our high school teachers tried to teach us not to be.

I am both a planner and a monster. And a lot of that depends on the length of work I’m going for. I have never in my life planned a one-shot, for example. I just attack that as it is. I follow my heart, if you will. But when it comes to longer chaptered fics, I really do think that some outlining is super helpful.

You might find it useful for one-shots, though, I dunno. Maybe give it a try and see what happens?

The two main fics I’ve done proper outlines for are Inimitable and under fire and I actually find outlining to be immensely helpful in psyching me up to write the story (I go through and re-read my outlines when I start to lose interest or diverge too much from the plot outlined there in the actual writing. 9 times out of 10, re-reading gets me stupid excited to write all over again) and it also helps me keep momentum going throughout the plot.

Here’s a pic of some pages of under fire’s outline.

Physically writing the work is really important for me because it forces me to only put down key points/feelings/ideas I want to include, whereas typing gives me far too much room to get lost/distracted by extraneous detail. And since my handwriting is a teacher’s worst nightmare and I cross out shit and write huge with emotion, I’ll give you a little bit of what the middle page here says:

Miles-

there’s something thrumming

vibrating in his ears wherever he goes

-closes his eyes and somehow enters blackness- emptyness (Stranger Things style)

beat

beat

beat

“help.”

–BACK - everything is gone

closing his eyes doesn’t bring the space back

–it makes him panic. He doesn’t know why. His heart is pounding. He’s sweating He has a horrible feeling of doom.

beat

beat

beat

its gone.

he goes home anxiously. Pretends everything is normal.

his neck crawls

So basically it’s less of a formal outline and more of a collection of stream of consciousness feelings and screenplay directions which I’ll flesh out in the actual story.

Personally, I love writing these kinds of things because they get me pumped for the story I’m about to tell. I get to write out the key scenes and work through all the hard parts first, and then, while I’m writing, I work through the little fun details and banter and I have to write to figure out how we get from one scene to the next and I love the challenge of having to fit those pieces together. I very rarely stick strictly to my outline, (as anyone who is currently reading under fire can tell you right now), but I do try to stick to the main plot points in it and my writing is certainly better for it.

So yes. Outlining is very good, but it is even better when you do it to some kind of music. I listened to What’s Up Danger from the Into the Spiderverse soundtrack on repeat while I wrote this outline to kind of transfer some of the relentless pace conveyed in that song to the piece’s plot.

I highly recommend using music to set the mood of your piece while/before you write a piece of any length. It helps get you in the right headspace (excited or somber or angry) to write. You need emotion to write creatively. You can’t just make that happen sometimes; you need a little help.

A couple other things which might help:

1. Leave your house or the space you’re normally in. Go to a cafe and find a nice corner and have a think and a try in there. Sometimes moving to a different space helps you escape cyclical thinking patterns.

2. Write what you want to read. Don’t bother writing for other peoples’ interests; that’ll just bore the shit out of you all over again.

3. Find an atmospheric mood sound to listen to on Youtube or smth (I personally like Rain on a Car Windshield for slightly somber fics, but you might be into ocean storms or dripping caves or whatever).

4. Heat your feet. I don’t know why but I am entirely unproductive when my feet are cold. Maybe this one is me-specific, but whatevs. Heat the feets!

5. If you’re still having trouble just sitting down and pounding the story out, that’s okay! Maybe it’s not ready to be written yet. Maybe you’re not in the right headspace yet. Sometimes that’s just how it is. One story makes its way out in like, a hour, and the next one takes like, months to finally be written. We all work at different paces. We all write for different reasons.

It might help to figure out why you want to write a story before you write it. Like, if its for attention, it’s gonna be hard as hell. But if there’s an idea that you feel like is important or if there’s a mood you’re trying to work yourself into or out of, then that might be a little easier. For example, I wrote a piece called make it work which is about Fogs finding his motivation to be a lawyer and fight for justice when Kavanaugh was confirmed and I felt super helpless in the face of our present justice system. That story kind of wrote itself and it needed to be written, I feel, not just for me, but for others who were feeling just as helpless.

Writing is catharsis in that way. Maybe you just need to find out what you need to wring out of your soul.

Sorry that got very metaphysical. But I do want to stress that getting started and ending a story are the hardest parts of writing them, so you are definitely not alone if you feel like you’re ramming your head into a wall here.

I hope something here helps you, my dear!

I've been tagged! (85 things)

I got tagged by @shadowboxmind so i guess we just jump in? So rules are to answer the stuff below and tag 20 people. Idk if I know 20 people but let's do it! the last: 1. drink: water 2. phone call: uhhh probably my friend ( @esmeedanikatodd 's boy) bc I've been helping him with an attempted murder case 3. text message: texted my boyfriend to tell him goodnight even though he's out backpacking and can't see my texts for days 4. song: i... don't know? Maybe something fifth harmony...? I was on a walk and I got lost and I paid more attention to that than what I was listening to 5. time you cried: lmao when my dad basically told me he won't pay for my out of state colleges unless they're Harvard, Stanford, or yale (which means I can't go) when my therapist is literally telling me to get as far from here as possible have you ever: 6. dated someone twice: yep! Many time! Three different people! I'm an asshole and an idiot! 7. kissed someone and regretted it: sure man 8. been cheated on: nah never even worried about it for real 9. lost someone special: yeah 10. been depressed: oh yeah 11. gotten drunk and thrown up: to quote my friend who answered this before me "Can’t drink, don’t want to" favorite colors: 12. Gold. It suits my brown skin very well and carries power with it. 13. Pink! It brights up rooms and smiles and it's just generally too misunderstoood. 14. The deep green that I see in my boyfriend, it's like a forest in his aura. 15: Rose gold is a combination of my two favorite colors! 16: Blue is very nice my nails are the same shade of blue as my nose ring right now! in the last year have you: 17. laughed until you cried: yes I have and we were supposed to be working @shadowboxmind and instead we were all rolling on the ground and it's all your fault (ily) 18. found out someone was talking about you: oh yeah lmao my ex who I thought was great apparently talks shit about me that's awesome and also my parents love to brag about me 19. met someone who changed you: yes!!! All my friends!!!! I love them all and many are actually pretty new!!!! 20. found out who your friends are: I'd like to think so 21. kissed someone on your facebook list: boyfriend so yes 22. made friends: heck yeah I have 23. fallen out of love: no not really, I've just been in love with boy for a long time general: 25. what did you do for your last birthday: a chat party with a bunch of white people lmao (spicy food and more spicy food) 26. how many of your facebook friends do you know in real life: All of them but they're mostly family and classmates bc I don't really use Facebook to socialise it's mostly just for school 27. do you have any pets: MY BABY MY PUPPY MY LOVE her name is Cocoa and she is pure and good and she's a chocolate lab and I took her for a nearly 4 mile walk yesterday so she currently hates me a little bit 28. what time did you wake up: 7:30. Thats sleeping in for me. 29. what were you doing at midnight last night: sleeping jfc you kids shouldn't stay up that late 30. name something you can’t wait for: seeing my boyfriend and also getting the fuck away from my family!!! 31: what are you listening to right now: the sounds of my family starting to wake up 32: have you ever talked to a person named tom: Yeah! He was a sweet classmate one day, never spoken to me before but saw me crying the day before and made me a minion plushie and gave it to me saying "I don't know you, I don't know what you're going through, but I hope everything gets better." He's not a friend but I appreciate the guy. 33: something that’s getting on your nerves: COLLEGE APPS (and normally my family but not as much lately) 34. do you want to change your name: I mean my real name is Sanskruti but I love Sunny much more so yeah? 35. hair color: Black 36. long or short hair: short ish. I have to grow it out for prom so it's touching my shoulders again 37. piercings: Regular earring piercings and a nose piercing 38. tattoos: Soon! 39. blood type: no clue kiddo I'll donate blood today so if you REALLY wanna know, shoot me an ask later tonight 40. nicknames: Sunny, sunshine, boo, kestrel, "Bollywood Beauty" (Thats the boy), Muskan ("smile") 41. relationship status: wonderful boyfriend that I love very much and trust me this is the straightest I've ever been 42. zodiac: aquarius 43. pronouns: she/her 44. most visited website: uhhh probably google drive bc most of my life is on there 45. right or left handed: Right 46. surgeries: Wisdom teeth soon but nothing yet 47. sports: tennis, taekwondo, and chess is a sport fuck you 48. favorite tv show: Parks and Recreation but Avatar the Last Airbender is a close second 49. vacations: Summer vacations tend to be either back to India or a road trip. California, Canada, Oregon, Florida, and the next trip supposedly is to New York. 50. sneakers: uh? I have a couple? Blue running shoes and pink worn out sneakers more general: 52. eating: uhhh healthier food except when it's not? 53. fave drink: water! 54. what you’re up to: cleaning the house for dinner guests 55. waiting for: the start of school for the boyfriend to get back 56. want: cuddles? Sex? Idk. Both are good. 57. get married: until recently it was a no but (don't tell him this) I really want to spend the rest of my life with my boyfriend and yes I know it's stupid bc we're young and probably won't even go to the same fucking college but it's the first time I've ever felt this. So yes. I'd wanna get married. 58. career: prosecuting attorney, then judge, then either Supreme Court justice or attorney general which is better: 60. hugs or kisses: HUGS I AM A SLUT FOR HUGS 61. lips or eyes: eyes are prettyyyyy 62. shorter or taller: i am short. I like fellow shorts. But also? Tall people? When they hug me I feel so safe??? So Idk man i like people. 63. older or younger: uhhh for friends? Anyone? If we click and can hang Im gonna hang with you. 64. nice arms or stomach: i like squishy tummies but I'm always a slut for toned arms (see boyfriend who had BOTH) 65. hook up or relationship: relationships are nice mostly bc I've never had a hookup but like?? I get emotionally attached v easily it would not work for me. 66. troublemaker or hesitant: Hesitant have you ever: 67. kissed a stranger: nope 68. drank hard liquor: staying away from that shit so no 69. lost glasses/contacts: never had them so no 70. turned someone down: lmao yeah the first time was the best time 71. sex on the first date: I mean? It wasn't technically sex? But it sorta was? But also the second time we dated, we totally fucked on the first date so yes. 72. broken someone’s heart: Yeah... sorry 73. had your heart broken: yep. Two different people now. 74. been arrested: Nah 75. cried when someone died: well yeah 76. fallen for a friend: well I'm dating him aren't I? do you believe in: 77. yourself: LMAO 78. miracles: I? Suppose I might? 79. love at first sight: nah 80. santa claus: Nah 81. kiss on the first date: sure man I'm not one to judge 82. angels: Not really sorry friend other: 83. current best friend’s name(s): James and André 84. eye color: Brown? Black? 85. favorite movie: fuck I don't really have one. How about? Coraline? Okay and finally! I tag @esmeedanikatodd @indimitable @scarfboi @agentsof-s-h-i-e-l-d @amberarts13 @themotherlimabean @fakebirds and honestly whoever else would like to do this bc I don't have enough friends