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calliesmemes · 2 months

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ABSOLUTELY UNHINGED COMEDIC RELIEF

ASSORTED QUOTES FROM TUMBLR TEXTPOSTS, X (formerly known as twitter) POSTS, TIKTOK, MEMES, AND OTHER SOURCES AROUND THE INTERNET

CHANGE gendered words and in-universe phrases as needed.

SPECIFY muse for multimuses.

“ Currently considering becoming a bother and a nuisance, maybe even a menace or a rascal. ”

“ Hungry? Eat the government. ”

“ Yes, I wanna fuck after every argument. ”

“ Silence, you uneducated peanut! ”

“ They should invent a being alive that isn’t so difficult. ”

“ Women have to think I’m hot or none of this matters. ”

“ Due to personal reasons I will be named an enemy of the state. ”

“ Being overdressed is a myth made up by people who didn’t want you to have fun and be sexy. ”

“ What even are daddy issues? Just traumatize your father back. ”

“ I LOVE complaining! You can’t take that away from me! ”

“ I went to the silly goose convention and they all knew you. ”

“ I’m simultaneously ‘I’m tired of this grandpa’ and ‘that’s too damn bad!’ ”

“ The word ew coming out of a pretty girl’s mouth holds so much power … I think that it can tear apart nations. ”

“ Someone made fun of my shoes and the whole time I just thought of ways to push them out the window. ”

“ If you’re short, simply get taller. ”

“ I better think twice? Buddy I don’t even think once. ”

“ My off putting looks, awkward demeanor, and strange behavior have captivated you. ”

“ There’s something deeply, fundamentally wrong with you. Can we kiss? ”

“ You are a fool. When you walk, clown music plays. ”

“ I mean yeah he’s evil and all but what if I were his favorite? ”

“ I really do hate thinking. ”

“ In my defense, I simply do not vibe with the law. ”

“ I’ve done nothing wrong. Except all the atrocities. Besides that, I’m innocent. ”

“ Sorry I couldn’t hear you over my internal monologue. ”

“ Of course you have white hair and trauma. ”

“ So apparently the bad vibes I’ve been feeling are actually ‘severe psychological distress’. ”

“ Stop calling me a bad person just because I’m orchestrating your downfall! ”

“ The more lip gloss I collect the longer I live. ”

“ Sorry that I am obsessed with you in the unhealthiest way possible. As if it's my fault ”

“ The multiple failed assassination attempts against me have helped build both character and self esteem. ”

“ I could be your loser boyfriend. Do you ever think about that? ”

“ Accidentally went and got myself killed yesterday, but god wont let me die so I’m back ”

“ What do you mean napping isn't a good coping mechanism? What do you mean my problems are still here? ”

“ Academic validation is required for my sanity. ”

“ RIP to everyone killed by the gods for hubris but I’m different and better. Maybe even better than the gods. ”

“ Researching the stages of grief to see if I can get them finished in ten minutes tops. ”

“ My parents were like I’m gonna make a child that is so beyond help. ”

“ It’s not easy to admit when you’re wrong, and that’s why I won’t do it. ”

“ Why can’t this family ever have a funky good time? ”

“ How do I show people that I’m more than my unethical career choice? ”

“ I fucked my way into this mess, and I’ll fuck my way out. ”

“ You look so biteable today. ”

“ Why am I suffering? I have so many correct opinions and takes. ”

“ I AM HAUNTED BY A PAST THAT I CANNOT GO BACK TO! anyways ”

“ Challenging authority, angering gods. The family business. ”

“ Third base is me telling you about my father. ”

“ Hey girl. Plagued by terrifying visions? ”

“ Got caught giving a fuck. Embarrassing. ”

“ I didn’t ‘miss’ the red flags; I saw them and thought that they looked sexy. ”

“ Do my dark circles and deteriorating health make me look hot? ”

“ I get my news from the only reliable source, cryptic symbolism in my dreams. ”

“ Another day of being a bisexual disaster. ”

“ I’m going to let myself be a little unhinged today, as a treat. ”

“ Some of you act like murder is such a big deal. ”

“ You wanna hunt me for sport so bad that it makes you look stupid. ”

“ You’re not a girlboss unless you’ve killed someone. ”

“ It’s so weird how no one ever has correct opinions about things except for me. ”

“ Hello, my love — I mean, my rival ”

“ No one is calling me baby and it’s outrageous I can’t believe it. ”

“ No talking stage. Mutual obsession and you see god in my eyes or nothing. ”

“ I DON’T UNDERSTAND HOOKUP CULTURE DIE IN MY ARMS ”

“ Yes baby your emotional walls are high and impenetrable can we kiss now? ”

“ Affection is disgusting. Drown me in it. ”

“ I am gatekeeping my respect from you. ”

“ Well, well, well, if it isn’t the consequences of my own actions. ”

“ I am equal parts fuck around and find out and please don’t yell at me I’ll cry. ”

“ Short legs, big butt. I’m a corgi. ”

“ Fuck being the bigger person; I’m going to start biting people. ”

“ Well that wasn’t very slay of you! ”

“ May I please get a crumb of affection? ”

“ I crave power! Please don’t yell, though; I’m sensitive. ”

“ You call it a near death experience; I call it a vibe check from God. ”

“ Here are some scissors. Now cut it out. ”

“ Might commit a little tomfoolery, maybe even some shenanigans. ”

“ All these flavors, and you choose to be salty. ”

“ How can I live, laugh, love in these conditions? ”

“ What if I said ‘to be honest’ but then lied? ”

“ I'm financially at a stage where I understand why people do fraud. ”

“ Yes I may be evil and morally corrupt, but I’m also incredibly beautiful and I think that makes up for it honestly. ”

“ Debates are stupid. Why would I want to sit down and argue with someone blatantly dumber than me? ”

“ I forget but I do NOT forgive.. I'm just walking around hating bitches can't remember why ”

“ Ding dong your opinion is wrong! ”

“ I’m coming for your kneecaps. ”

“ You dropped your nose you fucking clown. ”

“ Are you a fire alarm? ‘Cause you are really fucking loud and annoying. ”

“ Call me an escalator, because I let people down. ”

“ I love me a good lesbian scandal! ”

“ If you can’t run away from your problems, you’re not running fast enough. ”

“ Everything I want to do is illegal. ”

“ Don’t make me hit your ankle with my Barbie scooter! ”

“ I tell gay jokes because I am a gay joke. ”

“ Fuck! I dropped my mental stability! ”

#askbox meme #askbox prompt #rp ask meme #ask box #roleplay sentence meme #sentence starters #roleplay prompts #roleplay sentence starters #* sentence meme

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bangchansgirlsblog · 4 months

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Hello I love your writing so much

Could I please request for 9th member reader who didn't come from the healthiest families and she's very sensitive, keeps to herself when the boys ask her about it. However once she and chan get into an argument about her coping mechanisms and in his anger he gives her the silent treatment (for about a week?) And finally she break down in front of one of the other members, telling them about how her mother would always give her the silent treatment and she was never encouraged to express herself etc... and the boys all comfort her?

Thank you so much!!

Toxic traits.

Warning: Angst, crying, panic attack, mean Chan

Summary: as requested ^

Pairing: reader x Ot8

“Y/n?” The voice sounded like it was distant. She could barely hear but how could she? The painful ring in her ear blocked out everything around her.

“Y/n? You okay?” Hyunjin asked her again trying to get her out of her trance.

“Yeah-yeah,” her voice is caught in a crack. The hot feeling of tears starts to build up. “I’m fine, where are the rest of the boys?” She cleared her throat and put her bag down.

“They went to get some coffee, I told them I would wait here for you. Are you sure you’re okay?” He asked one last time to be certain. He could sense her vibe was off but yet again it was Y/n. She was the most mysterious yet energetic person you could come across. Oh? And she’s the youngest.

“Yes I’m fine Hyun, we should head for practice. We don’t want to keep the boys waiting,” she gave him another comforting smile before grabbing her bag once again and making their way to the JYP building.

The walk was quiet. Her thoughts were currently running haywire as she tried to peace everything together but she knew today wasn’t going to be a good day. The argument she had with her father still played in her head.

“So, what do you have in your schedules today?” Hyunjin interrupted her thoughts trying to ease the tension in the air.

“I just have dance practice with you guys then I get a break and you?”

“I have a photo shoot later after practice, kinda cliché themed.” Y/n giggle at this. Hyunjin gave himself a pat on the back for making her laugh.

“Well, I hope stay don’t make fun of you because that’ll be more memes coming out,”

“Yeah, yeah, as long as I rock the outfit no one can bring me down,” he flexed his biceps earning a gag sound from the manknae.

“Hyunjin that’s gross,” she rolled her eyes as they both entered the studio to find the boys stretching. They all said their “hello’s” and started their practice off.

“Y/n get your head in the game,” Leeknow scolded her. She had been messing up a lot today and now that they were halfway through, she hadn’t gotten anything done causing the whole group to get lost.

“I’m trying okay?” She snapped back at him. Han’s neck snapped in their direction as he looked at her in disbelief.

“Don’t snap at him like that, his older than you,” Han joined in the scolding. Y/n was tired and frustrated now. She couldn’t deal with them hopping on her back.

“Okay whatever,” she walked away from the both of them and sat on the floor by her bag trying to look for her water bottle. The boys were looking at her from a far trying to figure what was bothering her today.

“Hey Y/n?” I.N finally gave in and sat besides her to check in.

“Yes I.N?” She replied in her soft tone.

“You okay? You’ve been messing up all day-“

That was all she needed. That little push to throw her off the edge. Her eyebrows furrowed in annoyance and she stood up still facing I.N. Her anger was at a 10 and she couldn’t hold it back anymore.

“I’m fine okay?! What is wrong with all of you?! Don’t you see I’m trying?! Can’t you leave me alone for once?! Why does it seem like whatever I do is a problem-“

“Y/n. Out. Now.” Chan’s loud voice shook the room quite literally. She stormed off to stand outside by the door. Trying to keep her cool but she couldn’t.

“Don’t you see this is a waste of time? You’re a girl! You won’t survive in this industry!”

“But dad I- the boys got me. We’re making it-“

“Those boys will soon leave you just like your mum did. You’re pathetic and a waste of space. You don’t even bring anything to the table!” Her father’s voice was loud through the phone.

“Why won’t you let me to what I want for once?” She begged.

“Because! I spent my whole life working my butt off to provide for you and now look at you? You’ve basically become a stripper”

“Dad don’t say that-“

“Well it’s the truth.”

Her father’s words echoed in her ears. She felt helpless. She felt useless. She felt disgusted by herself.

“What was that?” Chan storms out the room. He was angry. It was obvious.

“Nothing-“

“What is wrong with you? What’s your problem? You’ve been so moody all day and whenever we ask you what’s wrong cause we know damn well we didn’t do anything wrong, you start acting bratty,”

“Chan I was just trying to-“

“No, I don’t want to hear it. You will go in there and apologize. Understood?”

“Chan! You never listen to me. Your always taking their side,” she snapped at him.

“I know damn well you aren’t taking to me like that. I’ve given you time and time again to come talk to me but you crush it off and decide to be a bitch to everyone. So don’t even say I don’t listen to you-“

“I’m not being a bitch, I just want to be alone,”

“Okay then be alone. Stop bringing everyone down just cause you can’t deal with you problems, you better go apologize to everyone and you can head home,” the tears in her eyes started to fall once he left.

Maybe she indeed was the problem. Maybe she needed to learn a way to cope with her feelings. Maybe she just needed to shut up.

She slowly took steps back into the studio and everyone turned to look at her.

“I’m sorry if I snapped at any of you, I won’t do it again,” her sobs were heard. They were so painful to hear that even Chan was so close to stopping her and pulling her into a hug. He felt so bad but he knew he had to stand on business.

At first Chan thought that maybe her silent treatment would last a day or two but it dragged and it continued to drag till it was the 1 week stamp.

He grew worried because he wasn’t not just talking to him but she wasn’t talking at all. She would only say hello and then continue with her day. Not even talking to managers or staff.

She would just nod or say small” thanks you’s” or “goodbyes”. It was almost like the fight he had with her shut her up completely and this was eating him up.

The stress of the VMA’s performance coming up and having to deal with his members made everything 10x harder to cope with.

“She hasn’t been eating,” Changbin informs Chan who lets out a frustrated sigh. “Should I just talk to her? Maybe that’ll fix things,”

“She’s so mad, she won’t talk to anyone. Even I.N,” this caused Han and Changbin to gasp.

“They’re like bestfriends, it’s like they were never separated at birth. What do you mean he won’t talk to her?” Han asked.

“He came to me in tears yesterday because he attempted to get her to talk but she shut him down immediately,”

“Then you’re going to have to fix this Chan. She needs you even though she hasn’t said it. Maybe it’s something deeper than your fight,”

“I know that for certain Hyunjin but how can I talk to her when she keeps avoiding me and walking away,”

“Just go to the gardens,” Felix suggested.

Chan hadn’t thought about it and quickly gave a hug to Felix who he praised for a bit and run to the gardens.

There she was. Sat feeding ducklings. She had a soft smile on her face. Her cheekbones were becoming visible because of the lack of food and the stress of the shows coming up.

“Y/n?” He said while making his way to her. She remained still and quiet. Continuing to feed the ducks.

“Can we talk please?” Silence. “Look I’m sorry. I’m getting worried and you not being able to talk to me means that there’s something deeper going on. Can you talk to me please? I’ll shut up and listen.”

“My dad,” she sat up and looked over to him. Chan in disbelief after hearing her voice after so long. “My dad wants me to go back home,”

“What? What? He can’t do that. We’re a team. We’re your family,”

“I never told you about him because of how toxic he is Chan, he won’t leave me alone until I’m home. Where he can control me.”

“But your legal and you’re on a contract-“

“He doesn’t care Chan,” she looked up at him. The tears in her eyes started to pour like rain. Chan’s eyes soften as he grabbed her and pulled her into his arms.

“I won’t let him take you. Over my dead body.” Was all he said as she continued to sob.

“I’m so scared. I’m so sorry I didn’t tell you Oppa,”

“Shhhh. It’s okay my love. It’s fine. You did now.”

He continued to comfort her until she could calm down. A constant apology left her mouth. Chan didn’t want an apology he just wanted to protect her and he knew the only way he could talk to her was if she had calmed down.

“Have you eaten?” He asked her knowing the answer. He just didn’t want to make it seem like he was tracking her consumption.

“I’m not hungry,” her face was squashed against his chest making the words come out a little muffled.

“You are. You’ve lost so much weight. Let’s go buy you some ramen and we can talk okay? How does that sound?”

“That’s okay Chan. I’m ready to talk.”

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walpu · 8 days

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walp walp hear me out

remember that trailblazer scene with firefly and how she just just gets stabby stabbed by the creature (memory zone meme i think)

and + Aventurine having access to the 'real' dreamscape, combine that with bodyguard! reader who will go through hell and back to make sure Aventurine will. Live.

reader follows aven during the entirety of the Penacony quest, including when Black Swan teleports the both of them to the real memory zone. (also, does anyone else feel like bodyguard! reader and Trailblazer would be besties... no, just me?)

now, keep in mind, Aven and reader have a... complicated bond. IPC workers here and there say their dating, the Trailblazer has straightup asked if they would just get a room (you get their vibe, you can go along with the secret assassin! bodyguard! reader req i sent in)

a little bit more insight on their dynamic (again, going with the assassin reader thing, its already known between the two atp, so this can be set after that period), Aven wants to love reader, wants to hold them close, and wants their affection, but dammit, he just cant bring himself to. Not when he's sure he'll just hurt everyone that comes close to him (his sister, cough cough)

and reader has the same mindset, they love Aven, as a boss, as that annoying but endearing friend, and perhaps as more. But they have blood, the lives of people that they've unlawfully taken, not to mention, they are 100% sure Aven would never love a person who killed just for monetary income.

now, here's where the real show starts. There's also another assassin (seriously, Duke Inferno should save his manpower) following reader and Aven. Safe to say, only one is making it out alive. How the assassin followed the two of them? No fucking clue, but somehow it does.

After i assume beating the living shit out of hordes of memory zone monsters, the assassin appears, and just when Aventurine's unsuspecting?? Boom, goes in for the kill.

Yeah, too bad. Aven's not dying. But reader is! Yeah, in a act of (cliche) protection, reader allowed themselves to be the one to suffer from the attack. (Bonus if they get decapitated, or just stabbed like how Trailblazer was by Cocolia). Aven will never forget the way that he just- watched reader's body fall, the light just gone from their eyes.

Anyways, he doesn't even get to hold their body. You just- poof into bubbles like Firefly did. The last thing he has left of his beloved bodyguard? Just a simple red earring, matching the one he wore. Nothing left.

Okay, im also going to cope here that the whole shitshow with Aven and Acheron did not happen, he returns to the room that reader had, and he just... stands there. He takes in the way that half of the room was messy, half of it was untouched. So much like them, unpredictable and just had a touch of the weirdness he loved so damn much.

(Bonus if you want a happy scenario, reader's alive and well, afterall, dying in the dreamscape doesn't kill anyone. Reader is probably smiling very awkwardly while they stare at a teary eyed Aventurine, then they make out /hj)

yay another rant, i had this idea for days, the decapitation part may or may not have been plaguing me (should i be concerned), anyways, thanks for listening to my word vomit, stay safe and stay healthy <33

feel like falling on my knees and begging to forgive me for taking so long this spring doesn't let me breath istg. I've got this request before 2.1 and only got to it now that's why Aven is ghosting me.

bodyguard!reader "dying" in the dreamscape to protect Aventurine

sort of a sequel to this but can be read as a separate work as well, the main thing you need to know is that reader was originally an assassin sent by Duke Inferno but they've changed their mind and stayed by Aven's side

notes - gn!reader, angst, unestablished relationship, no beta

You both knew the trip to Penacony would be difficult. You, in particular, knew that something big and very sinister is coming, judging by the way Aventurine danced around the subject, not giving you full information.

You may not know all the details of Aventurine's plan but you know him well enough to realize that he's planning on doing something extremely reckless and dangerous.

So you do your best to protect him. To shiels him from any possible danger, to keep him within your reach.

Of course Aventirune notices. How can he not notice when he already keeps his eye on you most of the time anyway. And just as you're trying to look out for him, he wants to looks out for you.

This mission already could be considered suicidal and he doesn't want you to be caught in this. Better to keep you in the dark, away from it.

Yet he can't help but selfishly enjoy your attention, your tenderness. You go out of your ways to make sure he's fine and he feels so undeserving of it. How can you be so kind when he's keeping so much from you?

You've seen him at his worst and you've stayed. You've proven so many times that you care for him not because it's just your job, not because of his money or status but because it's him.

He still struggles to believe in it sometimes. When he feels doubtful , he rubs his cheek against your shoulder in a playful cat-like manner and watches your reaction. Amusement you're trying to hide. Adoration you can't hide.

How can he doubt you? You're the one who should be doubting him.

He wants to melt into you, to be even closer than the two of you already are, but how can he love you without putting you in danger? Without draining your luck, without cursing you?

Sometimes he sees the same struggles in your eyes. When you carefully trace his face with the tips of your gloved fingers, your gaze sometimes lowers and you pull your hand away, as if you're ashamed.

But of what, of what? The blood on your hands? He has it too!

He wants to tell you this, to hold you tight, to never ever let go. The wish is so primal that everyone else can see. The memokeeper giving him a knowing smile as soon as she sees you two together, the masked fool taunting him about the only one willing to listen to him being his loyal dog ("though, judging by the way you look at them, little peacock, you're the one on the leash here~" she says. It feels like even a lower blow than the comments about his past. At least he expected those, but being taunted about his obvious feelings for is new), mx. Stellaron asking you two to get a room with a deadpun expression.

The worst one is the doctor though. Asking Aventurine to focus on the mission, then, in a softer tone, suggesting to tell you more about the plan. "It's foolish to keep it from your most trusted person, gambler. In the end, it may hurt them even more than your obsessive concerns".

If Ratio of all people gives you relationship advice you're doing soooo bad.

Yet Aventurine can't bring himself to listen to his words. He wants you safe and well, and he's sure (he's not sure) he's doing the right thing.

And yet he's wrong. He can't shield you, he can't. One of the richest people in the IPC, one of the Ten Stonehearts, the blessed one, yet he can't protect the one he loves no matter how much he tries. He's cursed, doomed, isn't he?

Damned Duke Inferno. He's dead, annihilated, and yet, somehow, one of his wretched dogs, his sneaky little assassin, finds you two in the depths of the memory zone. Such dedication to the cause!

There are two gunshots. Inferno's little rat and you strike at the same time. Them, aiming at Aventurine, and you, aiming at them. Only one bullet reaches it's target though.

It all happens so fast. You react immediately, covering Aventurine with your body. You move instinctively at the same second you shoot.

When their bullet hits you, you don't even feel it. Maybe because it's still a dreamland? The pain just won't come even though your back feels like it's on fire. You don't understand it yet but your body already starts disappearing.

All you can focus on is Aventurine's wide shocked eyes. His beautiful, beautiful eyes.

You smile weakly at him. That's all he can see before you're gone. He doesn't even have time to reach out to you, to hold you. As if he ever had the privilege of holding his loved ones in their final moments.

You just poof into the blue bubbles.

He rushes into the real world, in your room, praying to any deity that may here for you to be alive and well. It was a dream, not a real world. You can't die in a dream, not really. You weren't even killed by the memory zone meme, surely you're fine!

Yet you're not. You're not here, not anywhere in the hotel. You're truly gone.

He feels everything and nothing at the same time.

Of course, of course, of course he wasn't able to protect you!

How lucky he is, he has avoided death once again! His beloved died to protect him but he has survived! He's so blessed, truly, so blessed!

He finds himself on his knees, on the verge of hysterical laughter. The only thing you left behind is a small red earring he has gifted. And he clatches it so tightly his hand bleeds. Perhaps the pain is the only thing keeping him sane at this moment.

It feels like a cruel joke. It doesn't feel real, it shouldn't be real.

Wait... That's it! It isn't real. It's impossible to die in a dream! It was his theory all along, after all. It must be true. You just can't be dead, you can't, not you too.

His plan hasn't changed, he tells Ratio when he comes to check on Aventurine. He just needs to reach the real Penacony. To reach it and to find you there. You're strong and brave and so wonderful. You're out there somewhere, he just needs to help you to get back to the real world.

He holds into that idea like a madman. It doesn't matter how dangerous it is. It never did, to be honest. But now it's like he can't focus on anything else.

He hasn't feel so despaired in years. He just needs to find you, everything else is meaningless.

So when it's time for the final act, he gets on stage, fears not and doesn't look back.

He still holds his hand behind his back though. Clutching your earrings for dear life.

#i forgot if the bodies of those who died in the memory zone disappear #if not let's pretend the hounds took it for investigation #hsr #aventurine #reader insert #aventurine x reader #honkai star rail #hsr aventurine #walp's writing #no beta we die like sunday

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laniemae · 5 months

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John’s self destructive tendencies and coping mechanisms: theory

TW for sh, suicide mention

So I was thinking about this for a while and I want to talk about Mikoto’s tattered clothes in trial 2.

So basically in trial 2 we can see how the guilty prisoners uniforms have changed, with them having more restraints coinciding with Jackalope’s mention of phases of restraints. But Mikoto’s in interesting in this case because unlike the others his clothes are all tattered, and technically have less restraints than in trial 1. Initially I thought that this was remnants of Kotoko’s attack but looking at it more that doesn’t seem to be the case.

Just look at this these are bite marks. And obviously Kotoko wouldn’t have been biting him during the fight so it’s obviously self inflicted, and looking at the rest the straitjacket is ripped this definitely makes sense. Heck, it’s even said to be happening in trial 1 by this minigram.

It’s confirmed that all of the minigrams happen during trial 1, so we know about this already. And Mikoto mentions that he doesn’t know how it ended up like this, so it was probably John’s doing. And likely during his breakdowns at night time especially since Amane mentioned it right before. And since Mikoto was offered a replacement it’s probably a cycle of John destroying the clothes, and Mikoto getting a replacement so it’s probably happening a lot. And I mean, in the art for Double we literally see John tugging at the straitjacket.

(Also I noticed this now, but again in one of the minigrams one of the noises coming from his room is the sound of ripping)

But then the question is, why? First I thought that maybe John just wanted to get out as much as possible by ripping the straitjacket off. But I thought about it a while and that wouldn’t really make sense. As the straitjacket itself currently doesn’t have its restraints as much to really impair movement, and he never has expressed desire to leave but at the same time, it’s John, he basically hides everything about himself.

But then I thought, this is very likely happening during his breakdowns at night, so he’s lashing out at the environment and also lashing out at himself by ripping apart his clothes. And then I realised, John likely has self-destructive tendencies, but is harming the jacket instead of himself because he knows that’d hurt Mikoto.

I think this is probably what’s happening here, as it explains a lot for the tattered clothes and how it’s very likely a stress reaction. And also I’ve seen theories that the blood in the bathtub from MeMe was his own blood from an attempted suicide/self harming, and him collapsing in the shower was due to blood loss. This would also fit with the line sung in that scene “Maybe it's ok to try to keep on living,

Split in half, Make that heart beat”. But probably knowing that Mikoto would be suffering because of that, who he wants to protect so much. He lashes out in a different way by destroying the environment around him and ripping apart his clothes. Which good for John for finding alternatives I guess…

But this is really interesting to think about. As if it is true it gives alot of insight into John’s character. It’s very likely he’s heavily self loathing as expressed through Neoplasm and Double. And we know he’s constantly stressed and likely in mental agony. So how he deals with his stress as lashes inward, but doesn’t want to hurt Mikoto in the process is really interesting and sad. Like he’s willing to completely destroy his own life in order to protect Mikoto’s, but he’s already passed the breaking point and can’t control his stress and agony…

#milgram #Milgram theory #John kayano #john milgram #mikoto kayano #tw sh #with every analysis I’ve made of John I just want to hug him even more #LanieMae’s theories

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web-spinning · 2 years

Note

merc reactions to getting a new recruit but finding out they’re only in their mid-teens ? gender neutral please-

A / N - Ay, it's here. Somehow I managed to finish this faster than I expected. Hope you like it, dear anon!

Also, half of the photos are kind of meme-y, but you know what? It works...Please tell me if it works, I am losing my mind trying to find a good quality comic cut out, but only find those.

Mercs with a recruit in their mid-teens

TW. Ask to tag.

Scout

- he's not much excited, in fact he's a bit scared you might take his place,

- but after he finds out you're younger than him...he's so happy!

- he will teach you so many things,

- how to play basketball, how to get along with the older men, even how to deal with your first crush,

- since he is barely a few years older than you, he feels like as an young adult it's his priority to make sure you know all this stuff,

- he's got seven older brothers, all the lessons are probably from them,

- he really feels like you're just his younger sibling,

Soldier

- Jane thinks it's his duty to make sure you know the rules of war,

- he will show you how to use weapons, maybe even let you touch his own weapons,

- " But only for a few seconds, I don't want your young, inexperienced civil hands to spoil them! ",

- he will sit you down in the meeting room of the base, and tell you stories,

- half of those stories aren't real, but you don't want to make him sad, so you just listen,

- on the battlefield, he will follow you around to make sure you don't hurt yourself...or use your weapons incorrectly,

- also..." You do know basic history of your beloved country, don't you, hippie? ",

Pyro

- this Phoenix adores you,

- will invite you to tea parties,

- you will also get a plushie or two from their collection,

- you're the only person other than Engineer who takes them seriously, that's why they like you so much,

- their childish personality helps you cope with the fact you've been sorted out as a mercenary at such a young age,

- always there when you're feeling down,

Demoman

- in all honesty, he has mixed feelings about you,

- he can't invite you to the drinking nights with the other guys, you're just always left behind,

- in recompense, he tries to teach you how to use the sword in the meantime,

- you might never use that skill in the battlefield, but at least you have a thing that takes your mind off of the gravel wars,

- when you're down, you both watch soap operas together, because he's the only one in the whole team who likes them,

Heavy

- Misha just avoids you,

- at first, you think he's just a big, tough guy who dislikes teenagers to look more " deranged ",

- but finally, one of the men, possibly Medic, explains to you why he dislikes being around you so much,

- you remind him of his younger self and his sisters. The way he had to fight to protect them, the awful place they lived in for a while...everything comes back to him when he sees young face,

- you try approaching him about it, but he still remains silent,

- deep inside, on every mission he keeps a close eye on you, making sure you're safe,

Engineer

- Dell is now your step-dad, that's how it works,

- he needs a few energetic bones to help him with his projects, so you will often stand around and hand him tools when he asks for them,

- while he's working, he will tell you different stories about the other mercenaries,

- you ask him to adjust your weapon's, because they're a bit too big for you to handle freely,

- on warm days, he will take you out for a short walk to make sure you won't go insane,

- he assures you that you can tell him about anything, and he will help,

- he does in fact help, especially when it goes with your emotions,

- he's always there to cheer you up when you're sad, or share a smile with you when you're happy,

Medic

- he's so happy with you! I mean, such a fresh canvas to test on,

- every week he asks you to replace your heart with an Uber-handling one, and every week you refuse,

- but when he's not in his mad scientist mood, he's always ready to help you with some of the downsides of growing up,

- he's also very helpful when you're feeling insecure about your body ( all teenagers do that, right? Not only me, right? ),

- " Oh, don't vorry, zhis vill go away. Zhe average of healthy patients your age look zhe same as you ",

Sniper

- you never knew his first reaction, because he's rather quiet about it,

- but after a bit, you learn that he's actually very trustworthy, and big hearted,

- when you're down or one of the other mercenaries, you go to his camper,

- you both play board games there,

- he will most likely take you out fishing or camping during long weekends,

- you like listening to him talk about his adventures from the bush, but he will leave out the gorey details out,

- at some point, he just feels like an older, wiser, quiet brother to you,

Spy

- he's mad. Not at you, at the Administrator for even thinking about hiring you at this age,

- he doesn't see the reason why there must be a new mercenary, so he mostly avoids you,

- until during one of the missions, you save him for getting headshoot point blank,

- he does acknowledge you a bit more after that,

- you're not allowed in his room though, it smells too much like cigarettes in there,

- maybe he seems cold on the outside, but when he sees you struggling with your work, he will always help,

- helping you however makes him remember he couldn’t see this stage of his son’s life…that makes him feel miserable.

#team fortress 2 #tf2 #tf2 headcanons #tf2 mercs #tf2 x reader #tf2 x reader platonic #tf2 scout x reader #tf2 soldier x reader #tf2 pyro x reader #tf2 demoman x reader #tf2 heavy x reader #tf2 engineer x reader #tf2 engineer is dad #tf2 medic x reader #tf2 sniper x reader #tf2 spy x reader

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alfiely-art · 6 months

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Welcome to my Big Mikoto Kayano Analysis

Basically, I fully believe that Mikoto is the murderer. Not John, not an alter. Mikoto himself. I'll be presenting evidence and such below the cut, but I would like to preface this all with a disclaimer: I'm pretty sure I don't have DID, and while I've researched it quite a bit, sometimes research is wrong or the research isn't enough. If I get something wrong about it, please let me know! I will try my best not to be, but I'm only human. However, this analysis won't focus a whole lot on his DID? If that makes sense. Now, onto the post.

After examining Undercover, Mikoto's trial 1 & 2 voice dramas, MeMe, and Double, I'm fairly confident that Mikoto is the one who killed.

First off, in Undercover:

In Mikoto's main section of the song, the shots that linger have Mikoto looking unsure of himself, and deep in thought as he sings about how he's done nothing wrong. In the beginning of his first Voice Drama, too, he's quietly questioning why he's been brought here- if Es hadn't interrupted, I think he would've been trying to convince himself that he didn't do anything. Sort of like a few lines in MeMe.

Probably. Probably. Probably.

Mikoto isn't sure. The chorus asks Es, and us viewers, to really look at him- to look at him, fully, and to try to see that he's a good person, that he doesn't belong in Milgram. He asks Es to do this in his first Voice Drama, as well.

Mikoto wants confirmation that he didn't do anything wrong. Es mentions that it's possible Mikoto forgot the memory of him killing someone as a way to cope with the stress of it. As someone who suffers quite a bit from that, it can feel as though there's something just under the surface that you can't see. You know that something happened, but you can't figure out what. You can't remember. Maybe you don't want to remember.

I think Mikoto is suffering from that, as well.

Now, in the Trial 2 Voice Drama, John has stated that he's the murderer, not Mikoto. Quite a few times. He also asks us to look at Mikoto fairly, just like Mikoto himself did back in Trial 1.

But John doesn't remember the details of the murder, either. He says it's fuzzy. He can't even tell us how many, or their identities. Of course, he also adds that he had just split from Mikoto, but... why? What caused it? Neither Mikoto nor John have been able to point to what caused the split- John says he was born to protect Mikoto, but from what?

Well, you may have seen the theory going around that Mikoto was being stalked. And honestly? I agree.

From all of the tv-recording imagery in MeMe, the countless eyes in Double (there was so many I don't even think it's necessary to screenshot), how his first assumption was that Milgram was a TV show and he was being monitored... being watched without consent is definitely something Mikoto is worried about. Being stalked is extremely stressful. Plus, Mikoto most likely works at a company that overworks him.

This is from Undercover. And, in Double, there's a person called "Chief" texting generally dismissive and rude things to Mikoto before he calls. So, I think it's safe to say that the stalking theory and the bad workplace theory are correct- or, if it isn't stalking, it could also be symbolic of how society is always watching, and how you have to act properly or you'll get in trouble. Which, of course, is stressful too. However, I think it's moreso supposed to hint at stalking. Now, I have to wonder if both of these things are further connected. Maybe a coworker/superior was stalking him. That could make sense, though I won't claim its definite- we don't really have any evidence.

Despite John saying that Mikoto would have reached his limit if he hadn't been born, I think Mikoto DID reach his limit, and THATS why John was born. Mikoto killed, and John was born to help him get through it. Honestly, I don't think John killed anyone at all. Yes, John is aggressive in plenty of cases, but I think he simply feels it's the best way to protect Mikoto.

Now, I have run out of space for more images, so I will continue this post in a reblog in just a moment. I'd like to go more into proof that Mikoto is the culprit, John's characterization, and also how this all is affecting my voting.

#milgram #analysis #mikoto kayano #john kayano #project milgram #mikoto #john #kayano #theory #milgram analysis #milgram theory #orekoto #bokukoto #bokuto

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gaycrimesagainstmutants · 1 year

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Hello! Could I please have some general Casey Jr x ftm!reader headcanons?

General FtM S/O Dating Headcanons

Genre: Fluff

A/N: Ye ask, and ye shall receive!

Okay, let's get one thing out of the way.

This man. This man right here? *slams table* TRANS MAN.

So, this guy gets it. On a spiritual level, GETS IT.

You two are the "I can't believe we're both gay and trans" meme.

Baby boy helps you in ANY way he can.

You struggling to put on your binder? He's got you in under 10 seconds.

Don't like taking testosterone shots because you don't like the needle/the pain/shots in general? He's counting down from three and doing it for you.

Disphoryoa got you in a mess? He's learned 10 different coping skills over the years, which one you wanna try today babes?

Calls you stuff like "babes," "hun," "my paradise." He's a sappy little romantic, got that from Leo.

Yeah, Leo is probably you guys #1 supporter. He stalked you two on your first date, giving Casey thumbs-ups and excited grins from a bush that totally was there before, trust him.

This boy loves you more than the moon loves the stars, I'm telling you.

Showers you in compliments day in, day out.

Takes you out to dates whenever he can, because he finally lives in a world where he can. Gets so excited to do the classic couple things Master Leonardo told him about like going to the movies or walking along the beach or going on a roadtrip to nowhere.

Tells you all about the crazy adventures he had in the future, and you hang on to his every word cause he's such a good storyteller.

Holds you close and lets you cry when things get to much. He's the type to listen and then proceed to do everything in his power to make you feel better. Peppers kisses all over your face while calling you his pretty boy, sings you your favorite songs (and lowkey has a pretty good singing voice like holy crap), anything to make you smile again.

He tried to find you guys matching couple stuff, but got really sad when everything was girlfriend-boyfriend. So he just bought a relationship-ambiguous friendship necklace from Hot Topic and played it off as a couple thing.

"Case, why does the tag say 'best friend necklace set'?" "Uh...no reason, my love! I'm sure it's nothing to worry about."

#rottmnt x male reader #rottmnt x reader #casey jones jr x male reader #casey jones x male reader #casey jones jr x reader #casey jones x reader #casey jones x ftm reader #casey jones jr x ftm reader

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dexabite · 1 year

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because i'm bored: here's what i think about the characters of ride the cyclone!

ocean o'connell rosenberg:

definitely was a huge snob. in my language, we call those kind of people "maldita" HAHAHAH

she sounds so much like a high school bully that it's hilarious... but also, i feel like she was bullied in elem and was consequently also mean in highschool? idk she gives me that energy

DEFINITELY the kind of person to love legally blonde and mean girls and just projected it onto her persona LMAOO

though she's probably really very much a big softie once she developed at the end of the musical, but still hides it behind her bitchy and rude exterior

she looks like she would take someone's phone and squint whenever someone shows her a meme, like the way a mother would

noel gruber:

mean gay. that's it.

it's canon that whenever he's nervous or uncomfortable, he picks on his nail polish! and i love that! he's just like me fr!

i think the thing he really wanted was just a life outside of his simple one when he was alive... and i think monique gibeau was his drag persona

that said: NOEL DRAG QUEEN AAHHHH

feels like he would be more reserved because he's trying to look normal because of his mom yk, so he probably didn't have many friends outside of the choir (who weren't very close to begin with, judging from the way they talk in the beginning of the musical)

but besides that, he wants to be FLAMBOYANT and FEMININE and i love him

mischa bachinski:

iconic. stole boxes of communion wine for his eight year old cousin because of birthday. im in love with him.

sorry to noel, but he's the REAL most romantic boy in town. nothing compares to the way he sings about talia as if he couldn't live without her. get yourself a man like mischa.

probably loves ridiculous memes. would laugh at them for so long and show everyone in the choir

i think he doesn't actually watch horror movies but watches analysis videos on youtube about them like i do.

when he actually watches horror movies, he squirms around and does all of these weird movements and noises to cope with the fear 😭 not outright scream though, he's too emasculated /j

ricky potts:

he is an oc writer just like me. i love him for that.

was most likely into warrior cats as a kid, obviously marvel comics and star trek too. no way he wasn't.

he mooost likely didn't want to be in the choir in the first place but ocean forced him in it, based off his reaction to ocean trying to get people to like her again after singing about social darwinism 😭

that said, he's just like me fr... using escapism as a coping mechanism for his lonelines... i love you ricky and and your sexy cat ladies from zolar

and actually, i think he's one of the most underrated characters apart from constance which is such a SHAME...

he's so nerdy and JUST LIKE ME FR!!!

i think that before his hands degenerated, he was an artist. not a good one, but enough for people to recognize it!

jane doe:

CREEPYPASTA ENJOYER I CAN SMELL IT OFF OF HER.

creepy... i love her...

and i think that she's really good at crocheting, to add onto the whole doll aesthetic. makes tiny sweaters for ricky's cats, probably made a phone case for constance made out of wool... no matter how inconvenient it was

i think that noel would've painted her nails black too because she deserves it!!!

anyway, her and ricky are the "the bad bitch i got thanks to my autism" meme definitely. going both ways

anyway her actor's voice always sounds like an opera singers it's so impressive! that's why i believe that she can actually sing opera if they ask her to

definitely knows obscure facts about medieval torture and lions... just because!

FOORNICATION UNDER CONSENT OF THE KING!!!!

constance blackwood:

HER SONGS MAKE ME FEEL SO MANY THINGS IT'S CRAZY

the unique lesson of "there's no shame in loving my small town" ...my god you never hear that in musicals EVER

it's always "GET ME OUT OF HERE PLEASE!!!!" not the lesson that's in sugar cloud

that said, god... the fact that she doesn't like being called nice because it means that no one truly got close enough to her to know her for her goofiness... her weird thoughts, and her silly mannerisms and she had no one to vent to </3

hell, even her so called BEST FRIEND is mean to her!!!

but i feel like they'd still be close, despite that yk? best friends always stick together and as ocean develops more i think that they'd get closer until they're literally the only two who knows the other better than themselves

OH and i think that constance would've loved writing fanfic... she just has that kinda energy yk? she and noel would bond over writing and they'd talk about what they write and constance would hesitate because she doesn't want to admit that she writes gay fanfiction on ao3 😭🙏

#rtc #ride the cyclone #rtc musical #ride the cyclone musical #rtc jane doe #rtc constance #rtc mischa #rtc noel #rtc ocean #rtc ricky #i love this musical with all my heart and soul.#rtc hcs #ride the cyclone headcanons #ride the cyclone hcs #rtc headcanons

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p8567899754nhu · 7 months

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Haruno Sakura and misogynistic ass fandom

sakura haruno is one of the most hated chareters in naruto with her hate being so comically massive that it surprised the creator himself... but why ? what went wrong with sakura ?

I, in particular ,am not a fan of the way kishimoto wrote women in the manga or how shonen in general potrays female charechters. But the thing with sakura and misogyny is that it has more to do with the fandom than the author ,and if you ask me ,compared to how demented the fandom is ,kishimoto practically looks like a feminist icon . character criticisms dont bother me, but in the curious case of sakura alot of this “criticism” spirals down to very abbhorent misogyny.

starting right of the bat we have the dude-bros and self-projecting psycho's of the fandom, who hate her cause she's a shallow bitch(their main male charecter-onto whom they project- is a serial attention seeker btw , with being popular his main incentive in life) who likes the popular , good-looking guy and doesnt pay heed to the nice guy's advances dattebayo , no kidding -

i found it difficult to wrap my head around how this utterly gross misogynistic nonsense is so fucking common , it seems that sakura might have triggered their deep down incel by daring to want sasuke -and this also happens to be the reason why hinata is so popular amongst that particular crowd -because unlike that shallow bitch who rejected our nice guy, hinata worshiped his tiny err.."naru-chan"

these wankers' try to paint hinata as the submissive waifu prototype (erasing even her little canon qualitites we get to see to fulfil there deraged fantasies) and just to cope with the fact that sakura rejected naruto , but err he got the plastic doll waifu , so all is well. they dont end it here though , they go on to elaborate how miserable and sad sakura's life and is that this is what she deserves for "choosing the emo" over the nice guy , while naruto apparently had a better ending for himself by "scoring" hinata .

it reminds me of this apallingly misogynistic meme-

you'll hope these deraged psychos end here , but they dont.

the next slandering is surprise! surprise! -sakura's looks

because y'know naruto just had some dirt in his eye when he calls sakura cute. or even when making a remark on how incredibly beautiful haku is, sakura is the objective female beauty standard he compares him to, and the true hidden beauty in the series is hinata imao(the one whose been called weird, plain and crumpy throughout canon) or the inferiority at sakura's rejection and sasuke's obvious superiority to naruto is curbed by hyping up naruto's own looks saying (based on anime filler nonsense) that naruto "gets princess" and sasuke gets normal girls , while throughout the manga the only girl that shows any sort of romantic/sexual interest in naruto -is hinata (and the reason why she likes naruto has little to do w looks) , thats it , even when he becomes the messiah of the hidden village by making pain revive everyone-no girl is interested in him (I adore Kishimoto for doing this and not sticking to the sexist bs of these shallow bitches like our underdog nice guy only when he become popular GRR..GRR.., except for princess byakugan ofc- thennnn lo and behold ,studio peirriot uses this misogynist ass trope in "naruto:the last" , there is only a limit to keep rejecting you deranged fanbase i guess, sometimes one must comply for money)

these petty dumbsos dont even stop here, you though misogyny was enough? what about misogyny+sexualisation(of an UNDERAGE character) +body shaming ?

since sakura has commited the blashphemy of daring to reject naruto's advances (did you hear the recent news of a black woman getting hospitalized after she rejected a dude, becasue that turd was so pissed at her audacity that he threw a brick on her face or that gory case of junko furuta,may her soul be in peace,which is so sick i dont even want to delve into it), , dude-bros have to , no, NEED TO find ways to get back at her , uh? u rejected naruto? HAHAAH bish u flat

psychos , female charechters exist for girls to feel represented and not to serve as cumdumps for your repulsive incel mastrubatory fetishes.

sakura's own fandom has failed her in this regard with the net being bomabarded with sakura wankers' trying to prove their queen isnt flat, sizing her bosom from multiple angels across multiple panels so that she can finally fulfil her long impending destiny of actualizing the incel cumdump fetish

what is also curious is kishimoto doesnt comment anything on sakura's chest throughout the manga -he does add a panel of naruto's smol pp,and how naruto is insecure about it -NO one in canon says anything about anyone's bosom (excpet that creep jiraiya, but even he spares underage girls) and sakura almost never mentions any insecurity related to her boob size , she is insecure that she has big forehead, she is (perhaps) insecure about her weight that is why she skips her meal. heck even sai the roaster toaster with awfullly bad social boundries doesnt comment on it, but guess what? the fandom and SP does infact SP made a fucking full filler episode which is just sakura wanting big boobs and the comparisons of boobs from various koinichi's ranging from Tsunade, to tenten and ino, to shizune!)

why is this "boob measuring" so unique to sakura(and hinata -ill perhaps make a post on this sometime) why is no other female charecter subjected to this gross misogyny weird boob measuring contest,despite sakura not being the only girl who is flat chested- Tenten , Mikoto Uchiha and Shizune? well for one none of them has outright any interactions on level with naruto , second they dont irk anyone is any way - mikoto is also reduced to the trad sub wife prototype(she is what you'd say harmless, unlike the boisterous sakura, she is soft spoken , tends for the males areound her and doesn't err stand out), tenten and shizune are not even present in the narrative often and when they are , their words wrt to naruto are "safe" - they dont insult the main character , dont reject him dont make him look inferior so their boobs and body are spared

OH! just found another gem

incase you are unable to read it properly

-Rin is confessing to kakashi

-and half crushed obito is saying "wow bitch"

Yeah Rin !! how tf can you do that! imagine a 12 y/o confessing to her crush before she commits suicide for the "greater good" of her village , OMG !! you're such a bitch how dare you like else someone when my self-projection has a crush on you !!!! the gal!! the the audacity !!my virgin tradwife hinata so much better fr fr

#naruto #pro sakura #anti naruto #anti naruto fandom #tw: sexism

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starseneyes · 1 year

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Chenford REWIND - Lucy Chen / Tim Bradford - The Rookie - Season 3 Eps 7 & 8

I had a request for Episode 8, but that would mean 7 was living in a bubble without a real anchor. So, I decided to pair these two together for a two-fer.

I also realized that by getting these two written up, I'll have finished an entire season. Huzzah!

SPOILER ALERT: Standard warning applies. Please don't click the "Keep Reading" and expect not to get spoiled. I'm going to spoil these episodes (and everything that came before) to pieces. I do try to write these without foreknowledge, just so you're aware.

Kosher? Cool. Let's dive in.

"True Crime" AKA Grumpy/Sunshine Meme Activated

Lucy and Tim's First Interview

It strikes me that even as Tim is sitting down, he's turned in and looking at Lucy. At this point, Lucy is comfortable to Tim. What they're about to do isn't.

Tim hates this, but he's gonna do it. I don't know if it was a direct order from Grey, or he wanted to make sure it was done right so he was going to do it, damnit, but he's here and he's not happy about it.

Lucy, on the other hand, is thrilled. Her True Crime loving heart is filled to bursting and no doubt she's researched every person who was going to be there so she could fangirl all the more. It's adorable.

Also, these two make for good television. I mean, we already knew that, but the pretend producers happening onto this had me rolling. I bet the True Crime fans call them "Chenford" and perhaps that's the way the term might make it into the show someday.

"I'm sorry, I cut you off. I'm sorry."

She's so damn excited! And they haven't quite gotten their back-and-forth rhythm down that they will later display with gusto. It's close once she calms down, but girlfriend is thrilled right now, and Tim's "this is bullshit" meter is rising with every passing second.

"This is fun."

Tim looks at Lucy like she's grown a second head. And I'm trying to pick myself up from the floor where I've been rolling with laughter.

Look, the Grumpy/Sunshine trope is beloved for a reason, and we always knew Tim and Lucy had it in them. We've seen glimpses of it before. But sitting them down in an interview situation for an hour? This is pure gold!

I wasn't a fan at the time of airing, so I can only imaging how many memes were born out of these moments. It's amazing.

"Holy crap." "What is it?" "It's a, it's a-" "A what?" "A mummy. In a suit." "What?!"

Because, what else would a Mummy under a bed wear, right?

Eric Winter has this really wonderfully exasperated way of saying, "What!?" where you can really hear both the exclamation point and the question mark.

It reminds me of David Tenant during his run on Doctor Who. There was an entire scene in the TARDIS where he said "What!?" several times, and that was pretty much all he had to say on his first meeting of Donna.

It's. So. Funny. To have the ability to make a word funny. David Tenant and Eric Winter share that "What!?" power, and I kinda think Tim would enjoy the reference (see Season 4 to understand why).

"What's that saying? Those who can't do, teach?" *laugh*

We got a Tim laugh!? I mean, he made himself laugh, but it's still so cuuuuute. Like, rough, tough, mean-faced Tim having a chuckle is somehow so endearing. Especially at this phase, when we haven't seen him even smile much.

FAST FORWARD: There will be a day when we see smiley Tim. If you're just watching for the first time and wondering if it's coming... Tim's arc is one of the most complete (thus far) of the show. Stay tuned...

"You were literally my teacher. What are you saying?"

Ah, yes, the one indication that this episode was written in a post-"Amber" world where Lucy is no longer a Rookie.

See, the early days of COVID were a fustercluck for productions. I happen to know some people who worked through it, and there were so many different models of how to cope with it, copious amounts of hand sanitizer, masks, zones, wait periods in hotels for a week after landing, etc.

Now, there are more structured COVID protocols, but in the early days we knew so little about what was happening, and it impacted productions, ended series before they began, and delayed some seasons of shows that have now been permanently shelved.

So, Season 3's episodes aired in a very strange order compared to how it was written. Now, I'm grateful that the writers established Lucy and Tim's new dynamic early in the season so that's it's consistent, even when she's no longer his Rookie. So, I don't feel the need to call-out the air date vs production number, much.

But since the lower third provided for Tim and Lucy identified her as a Rookie, we know that this is supposed to happen during her Rookie year. But this one word lets us know something is amiss, if we're really paying attention.

And, golly, it's a word. I'm not trying to be dramatic, but trying to clarify for anyone who might not be aware of the whole Pandemic-fucked-everyone-over nature of Season 3 that makes this one word out of place.

So, if you ever wondered why Lucy used past tense instead of present tense, there's your answer.

Synchronicity

The moment they learn someone they know has been affected, they turn to one another.

And I love the synchronicity, here. Tim and Lucy have worked together a year, at this point, and they are very in sync with one another.

FAST FORWARD: Watch them undercover in 5x01 with how they sort of shift with one another, as though there's a cosmic pull between them that waves and they move with it. I feel that the evolution of their synchronicity really starts here in Season 3.

"It's LA. It's not the first time I've found a script at a crime scene." "I've only been on the job for a year and I've already found three." "Have either of you ever written one?" "God, no." *silence* "It was for a class."

Because she knows how he feels about screenwriters. If only Caleb had said "screenwriter" as his profession because then Tim would've locked him up right away.

"He was trying to cut her out—from the script, the cult, and the money."

True Crime Kink Activated. Look at how Lucy Chen is scoping out her future husband when he rattles off some Law-and-Order level soundbite. Girlfriend is surprisingly turned on at those words rolling off of his tongue. Oooh, the places that tongue could go.

*ahem* Now, Lucy's not going to jump his bones anytime soon, but there's definitely a moment there where she's finding Tim Bradford a little hotter than usual.

Who would've known the key to Lucy's heart was an oxford comma?

"Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned, right?" "Cool. Way to trivialize female anger." "Hey, I'm not trivializing. All sorts of crimes are motivated by jealous ex-partners." "And how many of those ex-partners are men?" "Most."

See!? See what I mean!? These two are hilarious. We've seen Lucy call Tim on stuff, before, but this format is allowing them to be hilarious with it.

And I love the way he gives her the side-eye before saying "most". It reminds me of the side-eye he will give Grey in a future episode when having to tell a story he'd rather keep private.

"I heard it was Office Chen who broke the case wide open." "I don't know if I'd describe it quite that way." "How would you describe it then?"

Married. This is so married. Because Lucy is giving him the "don't try me" wife face, glaring at her man on-camera for mass consumption.

The fact that he stares right back and doesn't turn to ashes is only because Lucy didn't want to commit murder on-camera. But I love the way Melissa O'Neil is playing Lucy's confidence in this episode.

"Her addiction to social media finally paid off." "That is hurtful."

I bet he's not even on Social Media. That makes it easier for whatever relationships he'll have along the way before he and Lucy finally get it together (I have faith). No need to change your relationship status online when you don't have it listed to begin with.

That said, Lucy's Mom totally has a shadow account that she uses to stalk her daughter to spy and see if she's found a stable man, yet.

The Wrong Video

I love how embarrassed Lucy is, and how Tim tries to get a look at what the heck she played before she gets it onto the right video. He looks actively concerned. Like, "Please don't tell me you're one of those 'dance challenge' girls because I was just starting to respect you."

And, look, no shade from me. But Tim Bradford likes to throw shade, and I'm betting he'd throw some on Lucy if he'd gotten a glimpse of that video.

"Okay, look, the case was definitely weird. But, I mean, come on, all this? This feels so exploitational. The low-hanging fruit of celebrity scandal and murder."

Tim is not wrong. A lot of what is on television relating to celebrity scandal is exploitative. But I love Lucy, here. Melissa O'Neil gets a lot to play with in this episode, and she does not let it go to waste.

She has nailed the withering sigh of your wife sitting beside you as she lets you rant and dig your own grave.

"You should be making serious documentaries about things that really matter." "My last film was about climate injustice in Puerto Rico. It won a BAFTA." "Oh. Well. Alright, then."

And Lucy's withering sigh has transitioned to a knowing look. Like, Tim, you need to talk to your wife about this stuff, more. She has the 411 and will keep you from getting embarrassed.

"You got, you got something in your hair." "What?" "It's kind of-." "Has it been there the whole time?" "Yeah, it's pretty big. Let's get out of here." "I would tell you if you had broccoli in your teeth, man. What the heck?"

Am I the only one who thinks there wasn't really anything there? Because, Tim is so ready to be done with this, and Lucy's high over doing the interview is totally annoying him.

"Bad Blood"

Breaking Up... In A Text

Look, this is totally the coward's way out... but when Lucy's face lit up to see his message, I might've vomited in my mouth a little.

So, seeing him break it off brought out a little cheer. Huzzah! But, oh, no, poor Lucy. But *whispers* huzzah Chenford *whispers*.

I've never had someone break up with me over text... because the only person I've dated since Text Messaging has been widely available is my husband. I remember the first time we saw people texting all the time in England and we couldn't quite get why.

But I did have a boyfriend break up with me over the phone on my 17th birthday... the week of prom... because he was cheating on me because I wouldn't sleep with my first boyfriend 2 months into dating him. Later found out the entire reason we dated was because he had a reputation as a "de-virginator" and none of our friends warned me. I don't keep in touch with most of them anymore.

So, while I'm not quite on Lucy's level of indignation, I understand the frustration to have your boo cut it off in the most cowardly way available.

And putting Tim in the middle!? Emmett, my man, what are you doing!? You already have one half of Chenford wanting to set you on fire. Piss of Tim and he'll happily help her finish the job.

"I can't believe him... breaking up with me by text? What is he, 14? He doesn't have the guts to do it in person?" "Most guys don't."

Tim looks over to Jackson on that beat. I bet Tim would never do that, but he's also only got his own limited experience. Jackson's actually dated other men, so he knows better than Tim, in this case.

"Look, just be happy he didn't ghost you." "Can we get to work now?" "Did Emmett talk to you about this?" "No. Why would he?" "Because you're friends." "We don't talk feelings. We drink and watch sports together." "That's guy for friends." "Straight guy for friends."

I think Lucy doesn't quite yet understand what Tim considers a "friend". Because, at this point Tim does have one solid friend. Angela.

And, yes, we are in the era of Tim and Lucy being friends, but I'd argue it isn't until Season 4 when they are as interwoven into each other's lives (if not moreso) than Tim and Angela.

Also to note... Lucy is holding her phone the entire scene. She quite literally can't let it go.

"Look, you want my advice-"

She does. Look at her open-mouthed, wide-eyed, hoping he'll say something to make this atrocity better. And she did tell him that she values his opinion.

Gosh, I wish I could tell her to lower her expectations right about now.

"Walk it off. Clearly he's the wrong guy for you."

As said by her future husband. What? I couldn't leave that alone! Emmett is definitely the wrong guy for Lucy. But Tim's still learning how to comfort Lucy, and this time wow did our boy get it wrong.

"It's the same advice he would give me if I got hit by a pitch. What is wrong with men?"

Trust me, Lucy. Someday you'll come to appreciate his sports metaphors. And find a new appreciation for baseball!

Yes, I try to write these without foreknowledge, but c'mon! It's right there!

"Have you ever been dumped out of the blue before?" "Let me think. One time my wife left the house in the middle of the night and I didn't see her again for two years."

Yeahhh... Um. I'm not touching that. Because Tim Bradford's being flippant, and it's warranted here.

But (yes, there's a but), Tim doesn't understand all of Lucy's hangups about how she sees herself, yet. He doesn't fully understand the weight of her mother's expectations. And how she has never felt enough.

Like, she can handle romantic rejection. She doesn't like it, but she can handle it. But why wasn't she worth a real breakup? That's what's playing in her head. She need to know the why. Why wasn't she good enough for some basic decency?

"Okay, I get it, in the grand scheme of things, this isn't that bad. I just want to know why. Can you please ask?"

If she can understand it, she can process it. But we all know Tim isn't asking his drinking buddy about his feelings—unless that feeling is about how he feels about the Rams not living up to their potential.

"He must've been a seriously hardcore guy for you to obsess like that. What was his main crime?"

Because Tim would only obsess if it was something important, right? Right!?

"3EYEZ tagged your shop back when you were a Rookie?" "My TO was chasing a suspect. I was guarding a vehicle full of evidence." "A vehicle that was ten feet away from your Shop. It's right in your notes."

I love how Tim's trying to rationalize this away. He has a habit of doing that when he's called out—trying to minimize his own embarrassment by stating facts. (Trust me, he does it at the beginning of 5x01 with Angela)

But, Timmy, Lucy's got the facts in her hands. And you totally dropped the ball.

"I was ordered to keep my eyes on the car. I'd just left the Army where you follow orders to a T."

He thinks this'll get her to back down, but Lucy's long past being afraid of Tim. In fact, she's openly laughing at him. And I low-key love it because this is a form of flirtatious teasing.

Look, these two have a completely unique language. Pranks. Embarrassing photos. And even this harmless giggling.

They're comfortable around each other, and by now they know what's crossing the line with each other. So, it doesn't bother me that Lucy's teasing him, here. In fact, I think it's adorable.

"Oh, man, I can just imagine the relentless teasing. Did they give you a nickname? Please say yes." *yoinks paper* "No."

But your eyes say yes. Wow, now I sound like some of those creepy Christmas songs from the 50's. You know the ones.

"That's why you're so intent on catching this guy. It's personal."

Ding! Ding! Ding! We have a winner! Look, when Tim tried to call in the cavalry when he first saw the tag, I wondered what the hell I was missing. Lucy, apparently, was, too.

Is this tag a symbol of a gang war? Or a killing spree? What terrible, horrible thing is going to happen because of this?

Nada. Nothing. Nil. Except maybe Tim Bradford's ego getting a bit bruised.

"Even if we were to track him down for tagging our Shop, it's a misdemeanor. Is that really the best use of our time?" *yoinks another paper* "I will get us a fresh Shop."

There's something so delicious about Tim's silent protest via yoinking those papers. And Lucy knows him well enough that they're done talking.

Look, these episodes aren't about pent up sexual tension or the angst of longing. These are foundational episodes, and what we're seeing is Tim and Lucy learning to work together. They're increasingly a unit in Season 3, even though Lucy spends most of it still his Rookie.

They're learning how to communicate with one another. So, if they ever do get their acts together, they're already going to have that part down pretty well.

"Let's go. Not a word about the Shop."

He knows her well enough to know that she'll tease him. She knows him well enough that if he says he doesn't want it, she's not going to do it.

See? They're communicating!

"What? You disapprove. You think I'm just dating him to make Emmet jealous? Heck, yeah. Maybe I am. But, he deserves it. Will you say something, please?"

Lucy processes by talking it out, we know, and when Tim doesn't interject, she starts projecting. Because even she knows going out with this guy isn't purely motivated. She's hurting and lashing out, and she knows it.

Tim's simply listening. But when she asks him to speak, he realizes that's what she needs.

See? Communicating!

"Today's the first time you've talked about Emmett in weeks." "You hate it when I talk about personal stuff."

Nice excuse. Look, Tim and Lucy are mirroring each other a lot this episode. They both have personal things that they're obsessing over that are clouding their judgment and thoughts.

And they're both rationalizing. Tim rationalized missing the tagger when he was a Rookie by saying he was just following orders. Lucy is rationalizing not talking about Emmett by defaulting to Tim's dislike of personal talk in the Shop.

They're both not thinking clearly. And, of course, it takes the other to help them get through.

"And yet you still do. But in all those conversations, you haven't said one word about your boyfriend." "What are you saying?" "Look, maybe Emmett treated the relationship like it didn't matter because you treated it like it didn't matter."

The realization hits her that he's right. It's one of those rare moments where Tim's the one helping Lucy examine herself. But that's what I love about them. They help refine one another. It's a give and take, and not just one person "healing" the other.

Tim and Lucy are on their own, personal journeys to healing and self-realization. But, I'll argue, each is a vital part of that journey. But to give one or the other full credit is to ignore the individual's effort to grow.

Tim and Lucy are growing together. And I love that so much more than one patching the other up. We're not patching up holes, we're actually healing. Yes, there will always be scars. But the healing makes it all so much more bearable, and so much easier to fully live, again.

But when he sees the realization hit her, his gaze softens. Tim hates to see her in pain. But we're not quite at the point where he's going to offer her comfort, especially on the job.

After all, Lucy is still his Rookie, and he needs to keep the lines firm between them. Because, if he were honest, he'd realize they're already getting blurrier and blurrier.

"Alright. Focus up. You read the file. Do you think 3EYEZ is done for the day?"

Tim's trying to get her back on track, like he has so many times before. But, Tim knows her well enough to know that sometimes barking out orders isn't enough for Lucy.

She needs something to help her switch her brain, something else to think about. They've done her mock-plan of how to sabotage her ex's wedding, before. This time, Tim tries a different tactic—he offers a piece of himself.

"Eagle Eye."

Lucy looks at him with confusion while I shove my face into a pillow so the kids don't hear me squealing and come running in here, mistaking it for screaming.

Tim doesn't have to do this. But he wants to. He wants to let Lucy Chen in just a little more.

"What?" "The nickname I got. After the Shop got tagged right under my nose." *giggle* "But it wasn't my TO who came up with it. It was Isabel. It kind of became her pet name for me." "Aw. That's sweet."

It's still hard for him to talk about Isabel. Those wounds are still healing, even though he's tested the dating pool a little. And it's important to remember that he and Isabel did have good times. There was a time when Tim had a lot of happiness in his life.

But he opens up a little to Lucy, here. He gives her insight. He gives a little of himself. And that's huge. He's starting to talk about Isabel without tearing up, without scowling, without the same agonizing pain striking his chest.

It still hurts. To a degree, it'll always hurt. But it's starting to heal. And I love that when he's starting to get healthier, the first person who gets to see it is Lucy.

We're not to the point of them swapping saliva and dreaming of the other's taste. But, we're building a really solid friendship. Heck, Lucy giggled when Tim opened up just now.

And I've talked about it a bit in this Meta, but I think it's important to draw out that Lucy has become comfortable to him. Why is this important?

FAST FORWARD: Remember the famous double date of S4? Why did Tim invite Lucy? Because he wanted a source of comfort in this truly uncomfortable situation. So, later when Bargain Barbie remarks about his creature comforts and about how he needs to get out and do more... nobody takes into account that Lucy is one of his comforts. So, once he and Lucy start dating, they are out all the time together. Why? Because he doesn't need all the other comforts when he's with her. Lucy is his comfort.

Thank y'all for reading and going on this journey with me. I think with this Meta, I've finished my tour of Season 3! It was a short season, so that made it a bit easier to chunk out.

And sorry this one took so long. My roof's leaking and it looks like I'm emptying out my 401K to replace it. It's always something, but I remain grateful. I've faced my death a few times in my lifetime, so every day I'm given is an absolute gift.

Just gotta take it one breath at a time.

#Chenford #Lucy Chen #Tim Bradford #Melissa O'Neil #Eric Winter #The Rookie #Meta #Lucy x Tim #Tim x Lucy

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