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#but i promise i didn't forget y'all
hazard-15 · 8 months
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To those who sent me an ask, don't worry I have it and it's been answered for the most part! I've just been busy with making up work for my classes and getting a new laptop but I promise your asks will be answered later tonight at the soonest or tomorrow the latest!
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dryedation · 8 months
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I feel like I make people excited for things I'm just not able to live up to. I make too many promises and plans for things that I think in my head should be no problem following through on, only to then not be able to even come close to reaching that seemingly simple goal and disappointing everyone I hyped up, along with myself.
This is more relevant to my activity on my main blog than here (honestly this blog feels more like an escape from the responsibilities I've made on my other blogs), but for personal reasons I don't feel comfortable enough to talk about it there. Maybe one day, but not now.
For the many of you who likely don't know... I was a part of a collaborative AU/AM known as AccidentVerse: the one with the fusions of outcodes like Vantablack (nightmare!ink) and Silence (dream!error). It was a relatively popular au at the time and I was the official artist for it.
I broke off from the team for reasons that I currently don't have it in me to go into any meaningful detail about (I'm still working through therapy to fully understand what happened to me when I was a part of that group; I'm sure it'll come with time), but one thing I'm now coming to terms with after 3 whole years... is that I constantly felt the need to justify my existence online through my work. I believe I had that issue even before I joined AV, but working for that team certainly made it much, much worse.
I was very young at the time, and I didn't have a whole lot going for me in the vast new social circle I was introduced to (like with any socially awkward 13 year old kid), so my only source of value was through the art that I made for AccidentVerse. And everyone loved it. Everyone I met was amazed at the skill I had for being at such a young age. I was valued, essentially put on a pedestal...
...as long as I was working.
Long story short, it burnt me out. This mindset still carries through to today, where I feel as though I have to maintain my prominence in the UTMV community by continuously working and pumping out new content, because... who would I be if I didn't? It was what I was good at, it was the reason I was so valued by the AV admins in the first place... because without that, I would've been nothing to them.
...
...Working on AV today, after adopting it as the sole owner... it's a struggle. I toil desperately for an ounce of motivation for a project that I just cannot seem to find. Don't get me wrong, I love AV. I love the characters dearly... but I'm starting to question if focusing on AccidentVerse is even healthy for me, with all the trauma I've gained from the people I worked under.
I just... I don't know. All I have is a half finished fic for AV that I practically have had to force myself to work on for the better part of 6 months, even if I genuinely hold some passion for the ideas in it.
I'll remind myself to not make as many promises going forward.
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readwebcomicsgdi · 1 year
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Sorry it’s been slow over here lately, still dealing with a bunch of dumb bullshit irl BUT accepting the fact that I don’t have any fucking time right this second I wanted to go ahead and post this rec I got a WHILE back suggesting a little webring of indie comics! Full disclosure I haven’t been able to look over any of them myself yet but “a bunch of smaller artists got together and made their own website goddammit” is certainly in the spirit of this blog hehe. You can find the site at https://webcomicring.org/
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Fun fact: they are taking applications from other comics that have their own dedicated website if that’s a thing that interests you!
There are around twenty comics for you to peruse right now, but Teratoaster ( @capricorndevil15​ ) is the person who reached out to recommend this to me so here is a quick rec for hers:
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Holly & Macy & Everyone Else
Holly & Macy and Everyone Else is a romance webcomic about a girl who becomes a witch, her best friend who falls in love with her, and her ex-best friend who is mad about it.
Have fun! Read more comics!!
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mountinez · 11 months
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kuiinncedes · 2 years
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me going from being bored in my house all day to bored in my apartment by myself all day wow 😍
#i have no idea where my roommate is also i still like dont know ... how to live w a roommate i guess lol like#i would like to know if ur not gonna be here at night ...... esp when it's just us two in the apartment rn but anyway#i texted her last night when i was going to sleep and i was like hey dw about turning on the light and stuff if u get back when i'm asleep#lol and then she didn't come back and she hasn't responded :P ik she's been helpign friends move in and stuff#bruh i helped my brother move in yesterday and i was kinda like so jealous that he has his group of friends here#whereas i moved in and i didn't know anyone in my building and i hadn't rly talked to the ppl from my high school in a yr#and i like kinda panicked abt being alone a little bit but he has all his friends and i'm happy for him but bitch when can that be me#but also like he and his friends are all in the same residence hall and i was thinking like i can already tellllll y'all are gonna be the#guys being loud talking in the hallways at night lmfao#anwyay#i'm gonna try to do some research work since i don't have plans until the evening lmao thank god i have shit to do tomorrow XD#i don't mind being alone at all i do kinda like it but the fact that ig i could much more easily be out doing stuff w friends or something#more easily than at home anyway idk why do i keep doing posts like this lmao#jeanne talks#ALSO I GOT A COUPLE OF THOSE RLY NICE ASKS SAYING LIKE LIST 5 THINGS YOU LOVE OR WHATEVER I WILL ANSWER THEM AT SOME POINT I PROMISE#idk things i love apparently lmfao#IN CASE I FORGET AND DON'T ANSWER THEM SOON THO ILY THANK U <3
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actual-changeling · 6 months
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i am having a time y'all, my brain is chewing on that one fucking sentence like a dog on a bone, so have some hurt/comfort with a nice dose of angst.
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They aren't talking.
It isn't impossible, even with Aziraphale back in heaven and Crowley in his lonely flat in Mayfair—nothing is impossible, not when they're together—and yet that is the problem, isn't it?
They aren't together. They aren't talking. They could.
Crowley thought about it, although there is little else he thinks about these days. Maybe if he had said more, chosen better words, kissed him earlier, run after him, pulled him back—
Maybe then he'd still be here. Maybe then he wouldn't be alone.
It is the emptiness weighing him down, the silence ringing in his ears, and how does he admit to himself that he misses his voice? His soft words, the stretch of his smile, the speeches about Hamlet and book restoration, about newly discovered cafés and ancient dishes long gone.
Aziraphale had lulled him to sleep more times than Crowley could count, a warm blanket wrapping around his curled-up body on the sofa, sprawling and moving, then calmed by his voice.
They aren't talking, and Crowley can't sleep.
He hears him in his dreams whenever he does, but it isn't his voice. It is twisted, warped, wrong, tainted by the acrid burn of bleach on his tongue, the meaning lost in the hollows where emotions should sit.
Days blur into each other, viscous and opaque, molasses trickling through an hourglass.
Sometimes he is scared he will forget how he sounds.
Sometimes he begs and pleads with his own mind to erase every memory of it, every 'I forgive you', every 'we're not friends', every endearment, every single time he said his name.
They aren't talking, and maybe that's for the better.
He said too much again, didn't he? Always talking too much, spilling the wrong secrets held tight to his chest, asking questions no one wants to answer.
So, after weeks of uninterrupted quiet, he simply stops. Crowley's mouth stays shut, his words chewed up and swallowed, and—on unpleasant occasions—thrown up. There are a myriad of things he wants to say, but there is no one left who might be willing to listen, not anymore.
Maybe there had never been someone to begin with.
They aren't talking. The world is about to end.
Aziraphale reaches for his hand, and he lets him, his fingertips cold, his pulse too quick.
"Crowley," he breathes, tender, reverent, a name said simply so it has been spoken, so it is real.
Crowley does not want to talk—not now, not yet, not when he can practically taste blood and ash on his tongue. With a gentle tug, he frees his hand from his grasp and pulls him into a hug instead.
They aren't talking, so he buries his face in the crook of his neck and breathes, holding and being held, and the haunting silence dissipates. Words are superfluous when there is the sound of his heartbeat, his trembling breaths, their clothes rustling as the embrace grows tighter and tighter.
They aren't talking, but they don't need to, not when Aziraphale cups his face and presses their foreheads together, not when Crowley slides his palm around the back of his neck and nudges their lips together just so.
They are talking—every gasp a word, every touch a phrase, every tear an apology and a promise at once.
They are talking, they aren't talking, they still love—violently, desperately—and the world does not end.
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dawndelion-winery · 4 months
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Consistency
Omg guys, tumblr user Acco not dead yet?? Shocking, isn't it? Teehee, anyways hope y'all enjoy this more than I enjoy bio.
In terms of taste, he hasn't changed at all
Ft. Childe, Itto, Wriothesley
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Childe:
He first proposed to you when you were children
A childish declaration, really, proclaiming he'd marry you one day when you're both older, and you'd giggled and pinkie promised to wait for him
You wouldn't really have thought he'd still remember that silly promise after all these years
Until he's back in Snezhnaya and declares he'll be staying for a while to settle some household affairs like his marriage
Oh, you didn't know? He's smiling at you innocently, pinching your cheek as he lightheartedly chides you for forgetting your promise
"Sorry to have kept you waiting so long, but I'm back to make good on my promise now, aren't I?"
Itto:
Itto was an easy enough opponent if you had the brains to counter his brawn
Or simply distract him
Which was absurdly easy when you were around
Even moreso when you've known him your whole life
It's not like Oni are a particularly foolish race either, Itto was a special case
Yet for all his blundering clownery, the one thing he knows with absolute clarity is just how precious you are to him
Always have been, always will be
"I wrote a rap for you, buddy! My pal, my really pretty pal. Wanna hear? Well, it's for you anyway, so of course you're gonna hear it. Lemme just...ahem!"
Wriothesley:
He liked the way you seemed so bright even without trying
Sure, the both of you had once been, but then he was faced with the cruel ruthlessness of the world
Even as he met your gentle wonder with harsh cynicism, he couldn't help but feel a tinge of warmth at your naiveté
You preferred to call it a healthy amount of faith, which was pretty important if you wanted to be happy
So quite naturally, it bothers him when you don't view things positively
You would think he finds you annoying, but he's never once pushed you away all these years
"Isn't it enough for one of us to be scarred by the horrors of this world? I'd like if you only ever had to see the good in the world. Stay with me. You've stayed this long...what's a little longer, eh?"
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Taglist: @ryuryuryuyurboat @yinyinggie @mx-kamisato @chaosinanutshell @haliyamori @irethepotato @boundedbyfate @favonius-captain @aqui-soba @tiredsleep @sadlonelybagel @mastering-procrastinating @lemeowade
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youunravelme · 8 months
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to all the girls you've loved before part six
author's note: okay......so i can explain. i know it's been like four months, but i swear it wasn't on purpose and tbh i lost track of time. so here's it is after months of waiting. i promise i didn't forget about it, i just had other projects i was working on (like the 30k words i wrote for two separate fics) that really took up most of my inspiration. there is a time jump in this, but not a huge one. but enough excuses! here's to part six (which is 9.4k words, i figured y'all deserved it)!
pairing: single dad!mat barzal x reader
summary: being a nanny for rich people was probably the worst thing that ever happened to you, until you started working for mat.
warnings: children, rich people, fear of falling in love, moving into angst city baby
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day forty-five
you woke up in an unfamiliar place. disoriented, you looked around, noting that it was still dark outside. there was a weight around your waist that was familiar in the sense that you'd felt that sensation before, but unfamiliar in that it smelled like someone new. your heart started racing at the feeling, until you recognized it for what it was: an arm.
your heart rate settled for a moment until you blinked and realized that while you were at home, you were in a different room and considering there was no crib, you could only make one leap in logic:
it was mat's room.
jason's words came back to haunt you almost immediately.
he'll get bored of you eventually. people always do.
your hands felt clammy as you slowly slid out of mat's hold. your knees were shaking. the air was too thick to breathe evenly, but you knew if you started hyperventilating in mat's room, he might wake up and freak out with you.
so you took some shaky breaths and then booked it back to your room.
you stared up at the ceiling for two hours until ella woke up. immediately, you got up, thankful for a distraction from the conflict brewing inside your chest.
when you opened your bedroom door, mat was standing across the hall in his own doorway. his hair was disheveled and his white tee shirt was askew, but it was clear he had the same thought as you.
the two of you stared at each other until one of ella's cries snapped you both back to reality.
"i'll get her," you said quickly before darting into ella's room and ignoring the feeling of his eyes on you. they burned into your back like someone was steaming the clothes hanging off your body.
in the crib, ella was kicking her legs and flapping her arms as much as her sleep sack would allow. and for a moment, you forgot the momentary discomfort at the sight of her gummy smile.
"good morning, sweet girl," you crooned. you reached into the crib and unzipped her sleep sack before picking her up and into your arms. she immediately snuggled into your chest, tucking her head under your chin.
you changed her diaper before heading out to the kitchen where mat was cooking eggs.
you wouldn't look him in the eye, just focused on getting ella into the high chair. mat walked past you, putting her plate of fruit on her high chair tray. it was the closest you'd been since that morning in his bed. and while it was technically innocent, it didn't feel innocent.
as much fun as he was, you'd forgotten that mat was still technically your boss, a friend too, but your boss nonetheless. and sleeping in his bed, regardless of how much you believed you needed it, was a mistake.
you couldn't lose this job, lose ella, lose sydney, but you didn't think you could handle losing mat. not entirely.
so you'd settle for losing the smaller moments of closeness. you'd stay professional with him if only for the sake of keeping your heart and income safe.
god, you hated thinking of him just as an income, but jason's words rang in your head like a small town church bell at noon. was he just waiting to sleep with you? was he just taking pity on you?
it was too early to get a headache.
you sat in a chair next to ella and checked your phone for any messages when a plate was placed in front of you with eggs made in the way you loved and a piece of toast.
"it was all i could manage without giving you food poisoning," mat said sheepishly.
you said a quiet thanks and turned your attention back to your phone, missing the way mat's face contorted into a frown.
"what do you have planned for today?" he asked, taking the seat across from you.
you shrugged, not feeling too keen on going out in public after what happened the night before. you weren't stupid, logically you knew new york was a large city and the odds of running into natalie or jason were slim, but you saw them last night and you weren't too eager to chance repeating the same thing.
"i think we'll just take it easy, stay home and hang out," you said. the words what about you were sitting on the tip of your tongue, but you kept your mouth shut.
mat hummed as he took a bite of his toast. "i'm gonna go work out with tito before practice, and then i think we have some interviews or media to do," he said.
you nodded but said nothing. when ella finished her breakfast, which looked like her tossing eggs onto the floor, you scooped the plate up and hurried back into the kitchen, excited to do something more than just sitting in a room with mat. you started washing the plate, not even thinking about the dishwasher three feet away.
"i can get that," he said, reaching around you and grabbing the plate straight out of your hands. he placed in in the dishwasher before grabbing the broom and sweeping up the eggs on the floor as he cooed at his daughter.
your heart lurched in your chest at the sight, at the view of him being so gentle and doting. you cleared your throat and dusted your clean hands on your pants to keep them from doing something stupid like pulling mat to you and asking him to hold you like he did last night.
"i hate to rush off," mat started as he placed the broom back in its corner and washed his hands. "but i told tito i'd actually be on time today." he got ella out of her high chair and kissed her chubby cheeks. "dada loves you ella bean," he said before approaching you.
you did your best to prepare for eye contact. but the bottom line was as soon as you met his eyes, you couldn't move, couldn't breathe.
he was the prettiest man you'd ever seen, with an even bigger heart.
you snapped out of it when ella reached for you, focusing on how her downy brown hair was growing longer, instead of how she was a complete carbon copy of her father.
for a second, you almost felt bad for her birth mother, nine months of being pregnant, all that labor, only for ella to look just like mat.
but then you remembered that same woman dropped her daughter off with him with just a note, and any lingering feelings of empathy and pity immediately vanished.
you took ella and scampered off to her room, ready to get out of mat's presence.
the two of you were playing with some of her toys when you heard mat call out a goodbye before the door shut behind him.
it wasn't until the lock clicked that you could finally breathe.
day fifty-five
"are you coming to the game tonight?" sydney asked over the phone.
you had your cellphone tucked between your shoulder and your ear as you prepped ella's lunch for the day. the baby in question was babbling to herself when she wasn't stuffing her face with the cheerios you gave her until you could give her lunch.
"uh..." you hesitated, trying to play it off like you were too focused on mashing up bananas.
"oh come on," sydney said. "i feel like i haven't seen you in forever."
"you saw me last week."
"that was seven days ago. you didn't even come to the game earlier this week. what was that about?"
the words were on the tip of your tongue, the truth dangled in front of you like low hanging fruit, but you couldn't get yourself to say it. not in his home, not when he would be getting home shortly, not in front of ella, even though she would never be able to repeat it.
sydney said your name. "are you there?"
you sighed through the receiver. "i'll be there."
"great! i'll pick you up!" she said before hanging up.
you and ella ate in silence until mat came through the front door. ella immediately squealed and threw her bananas in the air, some of which landed in her hair, other pieces ended up on the floor.
"ella bean!" mat smiled as he dropped his things on the ground.
he walked over and you shot up out of your seat to walk into the kitchen under the guise of grabbing paper towels to clean up her mess.
"how was she?" mat asked, taking over your job in supervising his daughter eating her lunch.
you shrugged even though he couldn't see you. "she's been fine. it's been a normal day."
"are you coming to the game tonight?" he asked. truthfully, he'd asked you earlier that morning, or maybe the word begged was a better word to use. you could tell he was disappointed that you hadn't gone to his game earlier that week, but he was never going to pressure you.
"yeah, we're riding with sydney."
"do you have anything to wear?" he asked.
your back was turned, so you didn't see the hopeful gleam in his eye. so when you shrugged and said "sydney said she would get me a shirt," you didn't see the way his shoulders sagged and how the corners of his mouth turned down.
when you turned back around, he was back to looking happy.
you started cleaning up the banana off the floor while mat handed ella her water cup.
"she takes a nap right after lunch, right?"
you looked up at him to find him already staring at you. his hazel eyes felt like they could see right through you, like they could tell you were pulling away and wanted to know why.
you nodded, rendered speechless by his gaze.
"i'll put her down, i've missed her." he booped her nose which made her immediately shriek and squeal. "i don't have to be at the arena for another two hours, so you're free to do whatever."
you expected as much, after his first long roadie, mat wanted to do everything concerning ella. considering he got back earlier that week before having a home game two days later, he hadn't been as present as he would like.
and the result was always a clingy mat.
"sounds good," you said.
maybe you'd text sydney to hang out at a coffee shop for the time being. or maybe you'd lock yourself in your room under the guise of napping while you stared at the ceiling and wondered how you got into this situation.
as ella finished up, the idea hit you immediately.
erin, the woman who you nannied for first.
when mat put ella down, you snuck out the front door and across the hall, praying she would be home. you knocked and waited, fully expecting to turn around and go back to mat's apartment.
you stood outside for all of five minutes before turning back around and heading back into mat's apartment.
"everything okay?" mat asked when you walked back inside the apartment. he was just coming from putting ella down if having one of the baby monitors in his hand was any indication.
"yeah, i'm fine," you said. "i'm just gonna go lay down for a little while."
"oh," he replied. "thought we could watch one of those reality shows you like. felt like i haven't seen you in awhile."
you gave him a small smile. "rain check? i'm really tired."
mat smiled back, though it wasn't as confident as it usually was. if you looked hard enough, you could see the edges of it shake, like he was doing his best to keep up appearances.
but you headed back to your room before you could do something stupid like apologize for the emotional distance and ask for forgiveness.
you got got into bed and stared at the ceiling, only taking your gaze off of it to turn your baby monitor on. you weren't sure how long you were in that borderline comatose state, just repeating jason's cutting words in your head, when ella woke up.
you got up when she cried, fully expecting mat to be gone by then, considering it had been an hour and a half. but you walked into ella's room to see him pulling her out of her crib in his game day suit.
and it should've been illegal to see him snuggle and kiss her cheeks. to witness him cooing back at her as he changed her diaper. you leaned against the door frame, unable to keep your heart from soaring at the sight. just to think, a month and a half ago, he was terrified, now he was changing a diaper like he'd done it his entire life.
he didn't notice you until he turned around and nearly jumped ten feet in the air at the sight of you standing there. "jesus fucking christ," he said. "you scared me."
you couldn't help yourself. "you don't say," you quipped with a grin tugging at the corners of your lips.
mat closed the distance between the two of you and passed off ella. "i hate to run, but--"
"you don't have to explain yourself to me," you said. "we'll see you later."
he nodded and booked it out of the room, but not before pressing a kiss to the side of ella's head.
you heard the door lock behind you a beat later.
you and ella spent the rest of the afternoon lounging around before it was time to start getting ready for the game. you had her dressed in her barzal jersey and a coat while you slapped on a pair of jeans and a tank top, waiting for sydney to bring you the shirt you'd end up wearing.
it was a quarter to six when sydney knocked on the door. she had her daughters with her. winnie immediately went to see ella, who was sitting in her playpen with one of her toys in her mouth.
"you look cute," sydney commented before tossing the shirt at you. without even thinking about it, you tugged the shirt over your head and threw on the jacket you had laid out on the couch.
"so do you," you replied while slinging the diaper bag over your shoulder. you quickly scooped ella up and looked at sydney. "you ready?"
she nodded as the two of you got three kids out to her suv. you had ella in one arm, her car seat in the other, with her diaper bag weighing heavily on your shoulder.
fifteen minutes had passed by the time you got all the girls in the car and strapped in yourselves. you thought everything was normal until sydney turned the music on a little louder and looked at you from the corner of her eye.
"what's going on with you and m-a-t," she spelled out his name probably as a precaution to prevent winnie from picking up any details.
you froze, but tried to play it off. "what do you mean?"
sydney rolled her eyes. "don't play dumb. you asked me for a shirt to wear tonight instead of raiding his closet like you usually do. you didn't go to the game earlier this week under some flimsy excuse."
you sighed, knowing you had been caught.
but sydney wasn't done.
"not to mention, m-a-t asked me what happened at the bar because you'd been distant ever since and hadn't talked to him about it." sydney sighed. "i'm not mad," she said. "i just want to know what's going on with you, i thought things were going well. you two seemed..."
you looked over at the blonde. "seemed like what?"
she shrugged. "just thought you two were a good fit is all."
you groaned. "syd--"
"but we don't have to talk about it, i just think you need to have a conversation with him sooner rather than later."
whatever you had to say was cut off by winnie screaming out the lyrics of baby shark.
the five of you arrived with an hour left until the puck drop. thankfully, the wags rented a suite which meant you didn't have to contend with a huge crowd and ella didn't have to feel confined to just one seat the entire night.
grace along with the other wags greeted you and ella with grace offering to take ella from you in exchange for a margarita, an offer you couldn't turn down.
when the boys came out for warmups, you went with sydney and her daughters and ella down to the ice. ella fought the headphones on her head, she kept reaching for them but you had to pull her little hands away so she wouldn't hurt her ears.
it took a few seconds for matt martin to spot the five of you before he was skating over and waving at his daughters and wife. he smiled at you and ella, tapping the glass once before continuing his warm ups. it was seconds later when your mat showed up with a big smile on his face. ella shrieked, and though the sound was lost in the ruckus of the arena, mat looked happier.
your eyes met and the noise died down, even if it was for a brief moment.
you okay? he mouthed.
you nodded and gave him your most convincing smile. it seemed to do the trick because he was beaming back at you as he skated away backwards, eyes locked on yours.
you turned away and caught sydney staring with a smirk. and while she didn't say anything, you could almost hear her train of thought.
when the game finally started, you were all back in the suite. ella was clinging to you, refusing even the idea of being held by someone else. you couldn't blame her, it was getting close to her bedtime and she was always clingy around that time.
you did your best to pay attention to the puck, to the other players on the ice, but your eyes kept finding 13 whether he was on the bench or the ice. he kept glancing around the ice, probably following the puck like you should be, and occasionally talking to his teammates.
you turned when someone nudged you. grace was standing there with a cup of ice water in her hands. "do you wanna sit?" she asked. "i know your arm is getting tired." you smiled and nodded thankfully, following her over to a pair of seats.
she let you sit in silence for just a moment before she started talking. "are you okay? you seem lost in thought tonight."
part of you wanted to be annoyed with the constant interrogation. no one had ever asked you this many times if you were alright. but that thought alone had your heart lurching.
no one had ever checked on you this many times like sydney, grace, and mat had. it was an unusual feeling, and one that made your heart beat faster in your chest while also making your stomach turn.
"i've just got a lot on my mind," you said, hoping the answer would suffice.
grace nodded, like she could recognize when it wasn't worth the effort to keep pestering. "if you ever need someone to talk to, i'm here. i know running into an ex is never fun."
you kept a straight face even though grace hit the nail on the head.
the game continued on with the islanders winning 6-2. but you had been so out of it, if anyone asked, you wouldn't be able to tell them who the isles played against.
you made your way down to the locker rooms with ella sleeping against your shoulder and the diaper bag slung over the other shoulder. you would've put her in the car seat, but after an earlier attempt ended in her crying and screaming for ten minutes before she fell back asleep, you decided to just hold her. grace had the car seat in one hand so you wouldn't have to carry it while holding winnie's hand with her other one so sydney could carry her diaper bag and her youngest.
the three of you waited with the other wags, making small talk amongst yourselves like you had all night.
anders came out first and kissed his wife before greeting everyone else. matt came out shortly after with casey. his attention was immediately drawn to winnie who ran into his legs with zero hesitation.
you waited for ten minutes before your mat came out with his game day suit on and wet hair. it felt as familiar as your mother's homemade cooking.
he smiled when he saw you, anything anthony was telling him didn't matter anymore.
"what'd ya think?" he asked.
"you played a good game."
his gaze drifted from your eyes to your lips then to the baby on your shoulder. his brows creased in confusion. "she didn't sleep in the car seat?"
"we tried, but she screamed and wouldn't settle unless i was holding her."
he nodded before adjusting the bag in his hand so he had a free one to scoop the car seat out of grace's grip. he nodded towards the diaper bag on your shoulder. "want me to carry that?"
"you saying i'm not strong enough to carry it by myself?" honestly, you were supposed to be keeping things professional between the two of you, but you just couldn't help but quip back at him. not when he made it so much fun.
mat rolled his eyes and took the bag off your shoulder and slung it over his own. "let's go home."
day sixty-eight
with christmas approaching, you were spending all of ella's nap times, packing your bags and wrapping presents. thankfully, you had the foresight to ship your family's christmas presents to your parents' house.
it was just a matter of wrapping mat and ella's presents.
you might've gone overboard with ella's presents, spending too much money on books and a stuffed animal you thought was cute. mat's present was different.
it was always gonna be different.
originally, you weren't even sure if you were going to get him a present considering you were trying to keep things professional. but sydney let it slip that his present to you was really thoughtful, so you immediately left the apartment as soon as mat got home.
in the end, the tie felt a little impersonal, but you added a note, heartfelt enough to not be insulting, but maintaining an air of professionalism. you kept the presents in your room, knowing mat wouldn't try to guess what you got him if it was out of sight.
mat had roped you into decorating for christmas, a tradition he hadn't honored since moving out to new york, but with it being ella's first christmas, he was going all out.
with ella's first christmas approaching, mat's family made plans to fly in two days before to attend the game. you made plans to leave the city so his family didn't have to get a hotel room and you could miss the christmas eve traffic.
your bags were packed by the door while mat got ella ready.
"who's driving you to the airport?" he asked at the dinner table the other night.
"no one," you said after you'd swallowed your food. "i'm taking an uber."
mat made a noise in the back of his throat. "no you're not. i'll drive you. what time do you have to be at the airport?"
"mat, it's not that serious."
"it is to me. so again, what time do you need to leave?"
mat came walking down the hallway with ella all bundled up against the cold weather that was raging just outside the window. snow flurries were falling down at a rapid rate, something that might've concerned you had mat, a canadian, not been the one to drive you.
he handed ella off to you before scooping your bags up in one hand and opening the front door with the other.
"you don't have to carry my bags, mat."
"well, you're carrying my child, so why would i make you carry bags on top of that?"
"you could've carried ella!"
"not when i was planning on carrying your bags! now let's go, you don't want to miss your flight, now do you?"
the three of you headed out to his car and loaded it up. mat placed your bags in the trunk while you strapped ella in before you both hopped in the front and headed towards the airport.
"you excited to see your family again?"
you nodded. "it'll be good to see everyone again."
"you don't have any relatives you'd rather avoid?"
you couldn't help it, a laugh burst out of your mouth without your permission. "actually not this time around but--"
an alert on your phone cut you off.
flight BA4739 has been cancelled due to a mechanical issue.
"you've gotta be shitting me," you said.
mat glanced at you before quickly turning his eyes back to the road. his attention, though, was still on you. "what happened?"
"my flight's cancelled."
mat eased into the right lane and began the drive to the apartment. "are there any flights you can catch?"
you were a step ahead of him, checking every possible flight out of jfk and shaking your head when you came up empty handed. "it doesn't look like it." you sighed and pressed your head against the head rest. "god, i'm sorry mat. i know your family is coming in tomorrow and this puts a dent in things."
he scoffed. "it's fine, just means they'll have to get a hotel, but i can take care of that easy."
your eyes shot open. "mat, don't put them in a hotel, i can find someone to stay with."
"i'm not kicking you out of our home. that's ridiculous."
you clenched your jaw to keep it from dropping at his statement. mat said it so plainly, it was almost like it wasn't a big deal.
"mat--"
"listen, you're not going to a hotel, that's final. when we get home, we'll check for the next flight out and i'll buy the tickets."
"you don't have to--"
"consider it my christmas present to you," he said like there weren't presents under the tree with your name carefully written on them.
you rolled your eyes, but there was a smile tugging at the corners of your lips.
when the three of you got back to the apartment, you grabbed ella while mat took the bags. the second you three were settled, you were pulling out your laptop and double checking for flights. when you couldn't find anything, you sighed and resigned yourself to a white christmas in new york.
day sixty-nine
you and ella were dancing to christmas music in the living room when the barzals came in through the door.
"let me see my grandbaby!" nadia said, dropping her purse on the couch.
you handed ella over immediately, though you hung around for a second to see if she would cry. but ella just smiled and stuck a fist in her mouth.
liana came through next, hugging you briefly before turning her attention to her niece.
a man who you'd never met but knew to be mat's father walked in carrying bags of his own with mat following behind him. you fully expected to be bypassed in favor of ella, and you wouldn't even blame him. but he stopped in front of you and placed the bags on the ground at his feet. with a heavy hand he'd placed on your shoulder, mike barzal began to speak.
"thank you," he said. "thank you for taking care of my son and my grandchild. when we heard the news, my wife and i were trying to figure out what to do, but then mat called a few days later and sang your praises." he squeezed your shoulder gently. "i can't tell you how much it means to us knowing that you're here taking care of ella and helping mat."
you managed a smile, not really having the words to communicate how much having mat and ella has changed your life.
mike squeezed your shoulder one more time before walking over to where his wife and daughter stood.
mat approached you next, the bags he carried in were resting by the door.
"i can sleep on the couch, or go out and buy an air mattress and sleep in ella's room," you said. "just say the word."
mat rolled his eyes and elbowed you lightly. "quit it. this is your home too, i'm not kicking you out."
"i hope i didn't hear you offering to vacate your room," nadia turned around and faced you, quirking an eyebrow. "we're not going to make you leave."
"you wouldn't be making me do anything, i'm offering--"
"and we're denying the offer," she said matter of factly. "there's a nice hotel not too far from here."
"i don't want to split up your family for christmas!"
nadia approached and with the arm not holding ella, she reached out and squeezed your hand. "sweetheart, you've been taking care of my babies, you're family to me now."
you swallowed the lump in your throat.
"i'm sorry you don't get to spend christmas with your family," she started. "but i'm glad i get to watch you open the presents we got you in real time."
your jaw dropped. "mrs. barzal you didn't have to--"
she shook her head. "you deserve to be appreciated, sweetheart." then she directed her attention to ella. "isn't that right, baby?"
liana turned her attention to you. "are you going to the game tonight?"
you shook your head. "i'm going to grace's to help with last minute decorations for the team christmas party."
"are you taking ella?"
you shrugged. "i figured i'd leave that up to you. i can take her if you'd rather focus on the game and not a cranky baby.
nadia pressed kisses to ella's cheeks, enough that the little girl shrieked with laughter. "let's play it by ear, if she's cranky before the game, she can go with you, if that's alright."
you smiled and nodded.
as the day went on, ella stayed in pretty high spirits, even when mat left to head to the arena. she took a lengthy nap which gave nadia enough confidence to take her to the game. you ubered to grace's house, a secret that was meant to stay between you and liana, who saw you ordering the ride.
you arrived at grace's house five minutes before the puck dropped. in true hockey wife fashion, she had the game pulled up in the living room so you could watch while you worked. sydney's daughters were camped out in front of an ipad, watching bluey while their mom came in and out of the room with bags of groceries. grace's daughters, you were told, were already in bed.
"where's the baby?" winnie asked when she saw you.
you couldn't help yourself and laughed. "she's at the game."
"why aren't you with her?"
you smiled and squatted down to look her in the eye. "her grandparents are watching her, so i came over here to help."
winnie furrowed her brows, scrutinizing you. "but you're her mom, you're supposed to be with her. my mom is always with me."
"i'm not ella's mom, winnie. i'm her babysitter. like when your parents go out sometimes and they have a babysitter watch you? that's my job."
"then where's her mom?"
you opened and closed your mouth a few times before you realized the words just failed you. there was no way to say the truth other than plainly.
so you shrugged and said "i don't know."
sydney and grace rounded the corner and smiled when they saw you, greeting you with hugs.
"so it shouldn't take too long," grace started. "we're just adding a few decorations, sydney's gonna help me in the kitchen with prepping some of the food for christmas." her attention turned to you. "do you think you can handle the decorations around the house? it should just be the downstairs and the railings up to the second floor. nothing too extravagant."
you looked at the totes of decorations numbering in three total on the floor. "i can do that," you said.
grace smiled wide. "thank you, thank you, thank you!"
you smiled back and immediately got to work. it wouldn't take you long, the house was already pretty decorated, but grace had gone about and beyond and insisted on getting stockings for every player's family still in town, which was more than half the team. there was a table in the front entrance where you put the players' stockings and laid them out in neat rows.
on the stockings, there was the last name of the player with names below it being members of their family. marty's had sydney's, winnie's, and alice's name below his own. sorokin's just had his own name. but you hesitated when you pulled mat's out of the tote.
barzal was in big letters with ella's name underneath.
and then your own.
you blinked over and over, thinking maybe you were hallucinating.
"i hope i didn't overstep!" grace's voice startled you out of your stupor. "when mat told me you were staying in town for the holiday, i went ahead and added your name. do you know if his parents and sister are joining us?"
you shook your head. the plan was you'd be with the barzals christmas eve and christmas morning, but christmas night, when you went to the lee's house, nadia, mike, and liana would stay back. as far as you heard, anders had extended the invitation, but they declined it, not wanting to impose.
grace nodded. "okay, sounds good then!" she made a move to walk away but stopped when she saw the look on your face. you weren't quite sure what she was seeing from her perspective, but your mind was racing and your feet felt like lead. "are you okay? you seem in your head."
you shrugged. "just trying to figure things out."
"is everything okay with mat? you two seemed fine not too long ago."
and you were. but you hadn't told sydney or grace about how you slept in the same bed as mat the night you ran into your ex. and you weren't going to share that now. they'd both read into it, think things were different than they actually were.
"i just miss my family," you said.
it was clear she didn't believe you, but thankfully, grace let it go. she walked back to the kitchen while you continued to lay out the stockings.
you finished with the stockings shortly after, not sparing another glance to the one with your name on it.
it took another thirty minutes to finish the decorating before you joined grace and sydney in the kitchen. you took a seat at the bar and watched them prepare some of the dishes for christmas. it was mostly just chopping and putting things into pans and oven safe dishes.
you were halfway listening to the chatter happening between the wives when your phone buzzed.
liana told me you ubered to anders'?
mat.
you texted back, a small smile on your face. sydney was already here, i didn't have a ride otherwise.
could've asked me to drop you off.
two hours early? no thanks.
well, stay there until the game is over. i'm picking you up.
you rolled your eyes, but still couldn't keep yourself from smiling.
"what's mat saying now?" sydney asked.
"huh?" you asked, head snapping up to see two smirking blondes staring back at you.
"mat," grace said. "what did he say?"
"how did you--"
"you only smile like that with him," sydney explained. "certainly never smiled like that around your ex, the one time i saw him with you."
at the mention of jason, your stomach churned, but you kept up appearances.
you, grace, and sydney were chatting on the couches when the front door opened with matt, anders, and mat walking in. winnie, who was originally dozing off, popped up from laying on the couch to see her father standing there. she smiled and ran over to him.
anders walked in the living room and kissed his wife.
which just left you and mat, staring at each other across the room and not saying a word.
"how was the game?" sydney asked.
all three of the hockey players shrugged in unision. "fine," anders said before collapsing on the couch next to his wife. "how was your night?"
grace looked at you and sydney before smiling and turning to her husband. "i'd say it was productive and fun." you and sydney hummed in response.
matt came and sat next to his wife and a sleeping alice who was in sydney's arms. which just left an empty spot next to you and mat who was still standing in the doorway.
"barzy, you gonna come sit or stand there awkwardly?" anders chirped.
almost like he was snapped out of a daze, mat walked over and took the seat next to you, leaving about four inches between your hips and his. almost immediately, he threw his arm over the back of the couch behind your head.
you turned and looked at him for a moment, forgetting about the other people in the room. "ella with your parents?"
he nodded. "i offered to take her, but my mom insisted on putting her down."
"did you score at all tonight?"
he grinned and nodded yet again, but it was marty who cut him off.
"should've seen him! two goals, one assist."
your jaw dropped as you looked back at mat. "that's insane!" he immediately beamed at your reaction. your eye contact was broken up when his phone vibrated. mat's face twisted into a frown before he stood up and offered you a hand.
"hate to rush off, but my mom just said ella keeps crying and won't go to sleep, so we gotta go."
marty and sydney stood to their feet, each carrying a child. "we should also be heading out," matt said. anders and grace stood up a beat later, offering to walk all of you to the door.
matt and sydney exited first, with you and mat trailing behind them. mat's hand rested lightly on your lower back, something that had your knees trembling.
grace and anders hugged all of you goodbye and promised to see you in two days. they stood on the front porch and watched as all of you got into your respective cars.
mat didn't say anything until he was pulling out of the neighborhood. unlike the times before, the silence wasn't tense or awkward, it was just calm.
"did you have fun?" he asked.
"yeah, it was nice seeing them outside of hockey games and bar meet ups." you yawned.
"missed you at the game, it wasn't quite the same without you there."
"you scored twice and assisted on one goal, i'd say you did fine without me."
"could've gotten a hat trick if you were there."
you furrowed your brows, but there was a small smile playing at the edges of your lips. this felt normal, like nothing had changed, just you and mat. "how do you figure?"
he shrugged. "i always play better when you're there."
you almost did it. you almost asked him why. but you were scared of the answer, scared of what it would change.
scared that it wouldn't change a thing.
he's not gonna fall in love with you.
it was only a matter of minutes before you were back at your apartment. the two of you took the elevator to get to your floor.
you could hear ella's cries through the front door as mat hastened to unlock it. the second the door was open, every head turned towards the two of you. mat shut the door while you walked over to where liana was holding a crying ella.
ella immediately reached out for you, rubbing at her eyes when she finally settled on your hip. "sorry," you apologized to mat's family.
"what're you apologizing for, sweetheart?" nadia asked. she squeezed your arm before ushering her family to the front door. "we need to get to our hotel and get some rest. we'll see you three tomorrow."
"bye mom," mat kissed his mother's cheek and hugged liana and mike before walking them to the door and locking it behind them.
you stared at him, even as he turned around and made eye contact with you. you finally noticed a line on his forehead that you missed earlier.
you gestured to your own forehead. "you have a line right here..." you trailed off.
mat reached up a hand and felt for it before rolling his eyes. "it's from my helmet, dumbass."
you gasped and covered the one ear of ella's that wasn't pressed against your collarbone. "in front of the baby?"
"you said worse two days ago when you hit your hip on the kitchen counter."
you rolled your eyes, which seemed to be a recurring theme between the two of you that night. "i'm gonna try to take the queen to bed, wish me luck."
"i can put her down if you want," he said but you were already walking down the hallway and waving him off.
it took twenty minutes to settle ella down enough to go to sleep, and by the time you hit your mattress, you were out like a light.
day seventy-one
you woke up when the sunlight peeked through the blinds. your heart immediately shot to your throat when you realized you couldn't hear ella's sound machine through the baby monitor. the panic didn't settle when you turned over and realized it was off.
you jumped out of bed, barely remembering to throw on a sweatshirt over your tank top, and threw the door open.
you were immediately greeted with the sound of christmas music coming from the kitchen. it wasn't until you rounded the corner and saw mat making eggs with ella on his hip that you finally relaxed.
mat turned around at the sound of your heavy panicked breathing. his brows were furrowed and he moved the pan off the stove when he saw you were winded. "are you okay?"
"the monitor was off, i'm so sorry i thought i turned it on last night but i forgot--"
"i turned it off this morning," mat said. "figured you deserved a chance to sleep in."
ella smiled at seeing you and reached for you. mat didn't hesitate to walk her over, probably to make it easier to cook breakfast. you took ella and cherished the snuggles she gave you.
"when is your family coming over?"
mat tapped his phone, presumably to check the time or his texts. "fifteen minutes or so?"
you spared a glance outside. "will they be okay in the snow?"
"uh oh, mama bear's coming out," he teased. "we're literally from canada, my family will be fine."
you nodded, feeling heat crawl up your neck at the slight overreaction and concern.
the three of you sat at the table, eating the eggs and sausage mat made. normally, when you were with your family, you'd eat homemade cinnamon rolls, but maybe this year was about changing traditions and embracing them.
you picked up your phone and called your mom, waiting for her to answer. when she didn't pick up, you just shot her a quick "merry christmas" text and telling her to call you back when she gets the chance, that you couldn't wait to see her tomorrow.
by the time the three of you finished breakfast, his family was knocking at the door, greeting the three of you with an excited "merry christmas" when mat opened the door. while they got settled, you took ella out of the high chair and carried her into the living room.
you sat on the floor in front of the recliner and plopped ella in your lap while mike and nadia brought their wrapped presents in. mat and liana were the ones to pass them all out while their parents got situated on one end of the couch.
you were surprised to see some presents for you written in handwriting you knew did not belong to mat, part of you fully expecting nadia to have been bluffing two days ago.
when the presents were passed out, mat took the seat behind you in the recliner, even going as far as to let you lean against his shin for support.
"now, i don't know how you do it in your family, but in the barzal family, we going youngest to oldest, and we record everything," mike said, holding his phone up. "our sweet ella, though, is the first person to take away liana's long standing reign over opening presents first."
mat got out of the recliner, choosing to sit on the floor on your left, seemingly to help ella open her presents. you scooted back to use the recliner as back support now that mat was sitting next to you.
you heard a beep, presumably of mike's camera starting to record.
"let's open this one, ella bean," mat said to his daughter. he started ripping it at the edge, carefully placing the present in front of her and waiting to see if she did anything with it.
ella stared at it, but otherwise seemed uninterested
"look ella," you said, reaching around her and tugging the paper a little more.
she was uninterested until she heard the distinct sound of ripping. then she tried it for herself, laughing and clapping her hands when it made the noise she liked.
her first present was a puzzle made up of the letters of her name from liana. her next present was from nadia and mike, a box of playpen balls. you couldn't wait to open them, to get her settled in her playpen with them and watch her entertain herself.
mat helped her open the books everyone had bought her. he must've told his family she'd gotten into reading lately, because you weren't the only one contributing to her library.
mat's present to ella was a walker. she'd started crawling a few weeks ago, and mat was determined to get her to start walking before the end of the year.
your last present was the last one for her to open. it was just in a gift bag, and ella thoroughly enjoyed taking the tissue paper out once she got a hang of it. but nothing could've prepared you for the shriek that left her mouth when she saw the stuffed hippo.
you didn't think you'd ever seen her smile that big.
she reached for it with grabby hands, bringing it to her chest when she got it.
"guess we know her favorite gift," mat chuckled.
the rest of the morning was filled with the other presents being opened. you ended the morning with cute sweaters and a barzal jersey.
"so you can stop wearing mat's," liana had said. "figured you'd at least want something clean to wear to games."
mat had mumbled something under his breath, but when you asked him to repeat himself, he just pressed a kiss to the top of ella's head and kept his mouth shut.
when it was mat's turn to open gifts, you could feel yourself flush with embarrassment when he opened your gift. you didn't know the platonic way of saying "i got this because it would bring out your eyes," so you settled with "i thought you'd like it."
and he did, he swore it would be the tie he'd wear in the first game of the new year when you got back in town.
nadia made a wonderful christmas lunch. it was light because she knew you were going to the lee's in a matter of hours, but still better than anything mat could've cooked up.
it wasn't long before the three of you were saying your goodbyes with mike, nadia, and liana all promising to come see you soon, and to thank you for taking care of their newest addition.
just like any other time the three of you left the apartment, you carried ella while mat grabbed the diaper bag.
ella sat in her car seat, snuggling her hippo while mat drove.
"you must be pretty proud of yourself for that hippo gift," he said.
you smiled at him, reveling in the way he'd occasionally take his eyes off the road to look at you. "i am. i have an extra one in my closet just in case this one gets messed up."
his jaw dropped. "you're a fucking genius."
you weren't the last ones to get to anders' and grace's house, but you surely weren't the first. there was a line of cars parked on the street, none of which you recognized.
"are we taking the car seat inside?" you asked when mat put the car in park.
his hand paused over the door handle. "do you think we should?"
you shrugged. "we could always come back out and get it if we need it. but i'm willing to bet that she's gonna be passed around like a hot potato tonight."
mat rolled his eyes but sighed anyway. "as long as dobson doesn't hold her, it'll be fine." with that, he got out of the car and opened the back door to grab the bag.
"wait why?" you asked, getting out and unbuckling ella. "what's wrong with dobson?"
"he's like 23!"
you blinked. "am i missing something? why is that a problem?"
"he's too young to hold her, he'd do something dumb like drop her."
you rolled your eyes as you picked ella up, but said nothing.
the three of you were immediately accosted by christmas music and food smells when you walked through the front door of the lee house.
"you made it!" grace exclaimed, coming out of the living room to greet you. "grab your stocking and head to the couches, i think my husband is gonna do a toast and then we'll get started on dinner."
you nodded along and turned to look at mat who hadn't said anything. your heart dropped straight to your toes when you saw him pick up the stocking that made your mind go blank the other night. his fingers traced over his last name, then ella's name, then yours. he hesitated on yours though, fingers running over it like it was something delicate.
it felt weird to watch that moment, like you were intruding on something private, but before you could look away, he looked up at you. "did you see this?" he asked.
you nodded. "saw it the other night. are you mad?"
he quickly shook his head. "nope. just caught off guard." he glanced back down at the stocking before looking up at you and smiling. "let's get on with this, shall we?"
the night started with anders toasting to the team, but more importantly the wives and girlfriends and support behind each member who'd played a large role whether they realized it or not.
mat nudged you at that moment, which earned him an elbow in the side and a wink from anthony who stood next to him.
when they broke off for dinner, mat offered to take ella so you could get your plate first, but you declined, saying you could wait a few more minutes.
while he was gone, sydney approached. "so, how was this morning? get caught up under any mistletoe?" she nudged you. "get any sentimental gifts?"
when you thought about it, you didn't really. the gifts you got, while amazing, weren't tear jerking, which was surprising considering sydney had said mat's gift to you was thoughtful.
but what was thoughtful about a spa gift card and some bath bombs?
"nope, just the typical gifts, you know?"
sydney's face twisted a little before it righted itself when mat came back with a plate of food.
"got you what i thought you'd like," he said, handing the plate to you.
your brows furrowed. "i thought we agreed you'd eat first."
but he smirked. "no, you did."
"mathew. go eat!"
he shook his head. "not before you. now, let's trade, i'll take my child and you take the plate and go eat with sydney and the other wives if you want." mat handed the plate to sydney before taking ella and walking away before you could say anything.
you watched him walk away for a moment before turning to your friend, only to find her already looking at you. "what?"
she had a smirk for reasons you weren't sure you wanted to know about. "oh nothing."
the night continued on without much fanfare, with you and mat leaving around the same time as the martins again because of the children all three of you brought.
you'd made it back home before midnight. mat this time, wanted to put ella to bed, making sure to leave the hippo out of her crib.
you were in your room packing the last bit of your things so you could leave tomorrow and fly home. you were in the zone until you heard a throat being cleared. when you turned around, mat was leaning up against the doorway with a box in his hand.
"i know you're probably tired, but i have one last present for you."
"mat--"
"i didn't want to give it to you in front of my parents and liana, just seemed too personal." he offered no other explanation and just handed you the box.
you took it carefully, going to your bed and sitting down on the edge to open the present. when you pulled the lid off the box, you were staring at tissue paper until you pulled it away to reveal a photo album.
oh god.
it was the thoughtful present sydney had talked about.
you immediately pulled it out of the box and started flipping through it. the photos were some you'd never seen before, but they were all of you and ella. until you got further in, the photos went from just you and ella to you, mat, and ella.
you looked like a proper family.
sydney or grace must've had a hand in it, because half the photos you didn't remember being taken and they were all candids.
you could feel your eyes water, you noticed the pressure. but you kept wiping at your face to prevent them from falling onto the album itself.
you looked up at mat who looked the most unsure of himself since that first night he had ella. "i hope it wasn't over stepped, i just figured you would like to see how important you are to me, to us, me and ella." he gestured at the book. "some of the photos i took, others i got from grace and syd. i hope it's not weird or anything--"
but you were already up and crossing the room towards him.
a beat later you grabbed him by the back of the neck and pulled his lips to yours.
he responded not even a split second later, his mouth moving against yours. mat's arms came around your waist while your hands made a home in his hair.
was kissing always supposed to be this charged? to feel this right?
you had no idea how long you stood there, kissing mat, before you both pulled away to breathe. your eyes opened slowly, only to meet his hazel irises almost immediately.
and then reality hit you.
jason's words haunting you at just the right time.
he's not gonna fall in love with you. you're a no good bitch who didn't know what she had when she had it.
you pulled away instantly and stumbled back into your room, dodging mat's hold when he tried to reach out for you.
"what's going on?" he asked. "what just happened?"
you shook your head and grabbed your bag, moving past him without making contact. "this was a mistake," you said. "i have to go."
god you felt sick to your stomach.
mat was calling your name, but you kept walking, out the front door, down the stairs, and onto the street where you hailed a taxi.
it wasn't until you got in that you exhaled.
what the fuck had you done?
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lavi-gs · 9 months
Text
Today, q!Missa:
When Roier said Philza's name, he yelled in front of everyone at . "Long live! I love you!"
Missa said he didn't like alcohol, and he threw away all the alcohol they gave his, except the one Philza gave his and that was the only one he drank.
He guided Philza on the dance floor, making them both dance in sync.
Although Missa was so confused and scared by all the information, when Philza said that he would not rest until he found their children, Missa replied "I will be with you, we will find them."
When Mouse called Philza smart, he added whispers "Yeah he is… and handsome"
When everyone is running in the dark, not sure where to go, he ran in the opposite direction to everyone, and said "I'm gonna follow Philza I don't know about y'all take care but I'm going with Philza".
I fight alongside him despite his lack of experience. "I'm not even scared when philza is here!"
When Phil was gonna go off on his own, Missa clung to him. "Where will you go? No, no, I want to go with you. Forget it guys, I'm on a date."
He got angry at himself for becoming clumsy around Phil. "With that I endure life- I endure for life. 'Missa! Speak well! You make me nervous Philza-'."
When he was infected with the virus and thought he might die, he shouted "No, I'm going to die, I have to do everything I want to do before I die… Philza, give me a hug!"
For the first time in a long time, Missa said goodbye properly and promised to return.
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And he did it!
But-
1K notes · View notes
lonely-cowboy · 6 months
Text
without you
pairing: connor (rk800) x gn!reader
summary: it's been almost three days since you last saw connor. with the ongoing revolution, you're concerned about his whereabouts. and if you'll ever see him again.
word count: 1.9k
warnings: occasional cursing but that's it
author's note: let me paint a little picture for y'all. it's currently 1am and i'm sitting on the couch in the dark sobbing like a baby bc i just finished my very first playthrough of dbh and didn't even realize i was near the end and i hate that it's over (i'm just gonna play again). anyway! my solution to stop (worsen) my sad lonely thoughts was to write this! yippee! healthy coping!
masterlist ⟡ requests
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You were never a fan of staying home all day and lounging around in your pajamas doing absolutely nothing. You felt unproductive, like you were wasting time. And if there was one thing you hated more than anything, it was wasting time.
But– like anything– there were some exceptions. The most common exceptions were the days after an intense investigation, mostly those involving considerable physical exertion (which really just meant any form of running). Those days, your body was so unbelievably sore that it was almost necessary for you to stay in bed and do nothing all day. Besides that, the only other exception was the occasional rainy day. 
And now. Now was an exception too.
It was nearing three days since you had last seen Connor. Usually, that wouldn’t have bothered you. Three days was nothing. It was always possible that the two of you were just far too overwhelmed with work to see each other. But with the rising android revolution that threatened Connor’s life– and that of any android– you immediately assumed the worst.
Huddled on your couch, you stared blankly at the muted television as it flashed between news stations. You weren’t really paying attention anymore, too consumed by thoughts of Connor. You pulled your blanket tighter around your shoulders, eyebrows furrowing with concern.
Truthfully, you hadn’t known Connor that long. Sure, you worked with him frequently to investigate the sudden rise in deviants, but in the grand scheme of things, it felt like you had just met him. Of course, that didn’t stop Connor from burrowing his way into your heart with those soft doe eyes and that gentle, slightly confused smile. You had a soft spot for him now, so it was perfectly reasonable that you couldn’t help but worry for his safety. 
You released a heavy sigh as you turned off the television, trying to shake away any negative thoughts. With narrowed eyes, you glanced at the other end of the couch where Hank had been sitting almost three hours ago. He had been checking in on you frequently the last few days to make sure you were– at the very least– living, though he would never admit it. Whenever he did stop by, it was always because he “forgot his jacket” or “couldn’t watch the Detroit Gears game at home.” Whatever lame excuse he came up with, it was always intended to ensure you were okay. 
Today’s lame excuse was that he ran out of beer and didn’t want to go to the store during such a “crazy fucking time.” That ended with the two of you sitting in silence on your couch, watching the television for any sign that Connor might be okay. In your book, that just meant he wasn’t dead.
But eventually, Hank had been pulled away to the precinct for whatever reason. He promised he’d make it short. He was reluctant to go anyway, so he wouldn’t be gone long. Three hours felt pretty fucking long to you.
You pursed your lips worriedly, forgetting Connor for a moment as your mind was now focused on Hank’s safety. What if he somehow got himself tangled up in this revolution? What if he managed to get caught in some wild crossfire with no means of telling you?
No, that was crazy. You were being irrational. Surely he just decided to brave going to the store to get some more beer once he left the precinct, right? That made so much sense. Obviously, he was outside your apartment building right now struggling to get in because he didn’t have a key and was too preoccupied carrying his mountains of beer. Obviously…
Without thinking, you scurried into your closet and pulled on your warmest clothes. You threw your thickest jacket over your pajamas, not bothering to hide your snowflake pajama pants. You pulled on your shoes and a beanie, ignoring the way it matted your hair. Then, you were out the door and rushing downstairs with the belief that you could miraculously manifest Hank’s presence.
There was no other explanation. You were blessed with some magical powers that you were yet to understand because as you marched into the snow, Hank suddenly appeared. You didn’t stop until you were jabbing a finger into his chest, glaring up at his towering figure.
“What is wrong with you?” you seethed. “You can’t just leave like that!”
Hank sighed with what sounded like irritation, though you knew he could never be irritated with you. He raised his hands in mock surrender as he grumbled, “Sorry, kid, I–”
“Oh, no, no, no! I’m not done!” you growled, choosing to ignore that maybe you were being a little overdramatic. What’s life without a little drama anyway? “You had me fucking worried, Hank! I’m already worried sick about Connor, I don’t have the energy to worry about both of you!”
Hank said your name in an attempt to stop you, but it was no use. Now that you had an outlet to channel your jumble of emotions, you were going to let them all out.
“I mean, you’ve seen me, Hank! I can barely get out of bed because of that goddamn android!” you shouted. “His safety is the only thing on my–”
Hank rolled his eyes as he grumbled something about how he was “tired of this shit” that didn’t involve him. That only seemed to fuel your fire, the crease between your brows deepening with anger and worry. You opened your mouth again to yell at Hank as he stepped aside, but you quickly shut it once you noticed the figure standing bashfully behind him.  
Connor stood a few feet away having clearly been told to stay put once Hank saw your angry self storming out of the apartment building. His hands were clasped neatly behind his back, standing tall against the harsh winter winds. His eyes were already on you, watching you with a warm glint. When you met his gaze, the corners of his lips turned upwards into a small, unsure smile. 
Compared to him, you were sure you looked absolutely stupid. No, no matter what you looked completely stupid. You stared at Connor with absurdly wide eyes, mouth opening and closing like a confused fish. You were so baffled by his appearance that you couldn’t even move, no wonder the poor man was confused. All this while wearing your stupid fucking snowflake pajamas.
Neither of you made any effort to close the uncomfortable distance between the two of you. You were thankful that Hank managed to find his way back into your apartment building because you would be a doubly flustered mess if he saw how awkward the two of you were. At least Connor made some effort to communicate. He raised a hand in an awkward wave, his soft voice barely heard over the din of the wind. 
“Hello.”
Your feet were moving before your brain could catch up. You sprinted towards Connor– though it was more of a fast waddle if anything– and pulled him into a tight hug. A heavy sigh of relief left your lips as you felt his firm body against you, inhaling his scent slowly. He was real.
You squeezed him a little tighter, burying your head into his chest. It was as if you didn’t want to let him go, and truthfully, you didn’t. You couldn’t bear the thought of never seeing him again.
Connor’s arms wrapped lightly around your body. He leaned into your touch, relaxing in your arms with a comforted grin. Until you, he had no idea what it was like to be cared for. Perhaps the greatest gift of consciousness was your affection.
Connor murmured your name in a quiet rasp, his lips moving against your hair. He reared back to catch your eyes, but you refused to let him. You just held him closer and allowed yourself to calm in his presence. When you finally did pull away, you glanced at him with a confusing look of joy, sadness, and anger.
“I didn’t think you were ever coming back,” you mumbled, letting the words spill out. “I was so scared… Connor, I… God, I missed you…”
There was a beat of silence as Connor’s LED spiraled yellow, his head tilted to the slightest degree. It seemed as if he was struggling to find the right words out.
“I…,” Connor started hoarsely. “I think… I missed you too.”
Despite the whirlwind of emotions you felt, you couldn’t help but laugh at Connor’s words. A small smile traced your lips as you studied him with furrowed brows.
“You think?” you repeated with another quiet laugh, your breath pluming in the cold air.
Connor paused again, his LED flashing yellow once more. He opened his mouth to speak but closed it as he considered his words a moment longer. He was looking into the distance, but when he glanced back down to you it was as if all the right words suddenly came to him.
“I don’t know what it feels like to miss someone,” he explained softly. “But I think… I think this is what it would feel like. I felt… I don’t know… there was a tightness inside of me when I thought I would never see you again. Is that what it’s like to miss someone?”
Your grin widened as Connor spoke. A tinge of pink coated your cheeks, and you were sure it wasn’t just from the cold.
“Maybe I’m biased, but yeah, I think so,” you answered sweetly.
“Oh,” Connor muttered as he took a moment to process that information. “Then, yes. It appears I did miss you.”
Your chest felt light from the joy of having Connor back. You were so giddy, in fact, that you didn’t even think before you were leaning forward and pressing a delicate kiss to Connor’s cheek. It was only when you pulled away that you realized what you had done, your face heating with embarrassment.
You glanced at Connor worriedly and noticed the faint blue coloring along his cheeks. It almost made you laugh seeing such a confident android turned into such a poor, flustered mess. Well, you took his silence to mean his was flustered, but his silence lasted so long that you weren’t so sure anymore.
“Connor?” you asked. “You okay?”
“Yes,” Connor replied immediately. “I was searching my database for the best way to greet someone you missed.”
It was your turn to be flustered again, eyes going wide with surprise as you murmured, “Oh. And… what did you find?”
Connor’s gaze finally focused back on you, his expression neutral aside from his fading blush. The corner of his lip quirked up slightly as his eyes searched your face like he was memorizing every little detail.
“I found that the best way to convey you missed someone is by kissing them, as you’ve done to me,” he answered in his typical matter-of-fact tone. “However, whereas you kissed my cheek, I noticed that most people kiss on the lips. I’d like to do the same if that’s alright with you.”
Your stunned silence must’ve been enough of an answer for Connor because he leaned forward with a grin. His warm hands moved to hold your cheeks, fighting off the evening chill. Your hands immediately moved to rest over top his, seeking out his warmth while his soft lips moved against yours. He pulled away far too soon for your liking, but he rested his forehead against yours as he whispered sweet words against your skin. 
“I missed you too.”
───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────
author's note: i hope you enjoyed! this is my very first post ever, so i'm a little nervous! if you have any constructive (and kind) criticism, please lmk! and if you have any requests i'd love to hear those too :)
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brodieland · 3 months
Text
.˚ 𓈒 ࣪.𝝑𝝔 Can we finally call a Truce? ´ˎ˗
Percy Jackson x Fem!Hades!Reader Synopsis: After the years of hating each other (secretly pining), you're finally together !! Now how does your dad take the news..? Warning(s): some swearing Word Count: 2342
╰➤ MASTERLIST pt5
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2 weeks later
[11:39] AM
˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ 𝜗𝜚
@seaweedbrain • 10 min
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Liked by Styxgirl and more.. @seaweedbrain: embarrassing the way me and my girl eat all y'all up🤦🤦 View comments..
@StyxGirl: ughh who is that girl and why is she so finee😭 →@seaweedbrain: @StyxGirl she not allat fr (im horrendously down bad) →@deathboynico: @seaweedbrain take it to the dms😬👋 →@seaweedbrain: @deathboynicoo I will spam about my gf as much as I dam well pls !!
@wisegirl: we did itt🙄 @BeaurengardOnTop →@BeaurengardOnTop: @wisegirl only took like five years brooo 😭👋 →@seaweedbrain: @BeaurengardOnTop better late than neva‼️ →@StyxGirl: @BeaurengardOnTop mb im a little stubborn😛 →@seaweednbrain: @StyxGirl make up for it by coming over !
˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ 𝜗𝜚
And there you were, on your way to meet up with your boyfriend. Yes, boyfriend. Percy Jackson was now your boyfriend. When you told your beloved friends Silena and Annabeth, they weren't as shocked about it as you thought they would be.
"Finally."
"It's not like we weren't expecting it."
Maybe at least pretend. Let's all hold hands in a circle and jump up and down and chant of happiness. Okay maybe that's too much, you had just thought that after all the screaming at you to get it together, they'd have more of a reaction for when you finally got it together. Whatever, moving on. Finally you made it to Percy's, aw he left the door open this time. Now what if you just scared him a little.
You slowly walked through the door to be sure not to make any noise. After you did that you tip-toed your way to his room and ran through the door, the loud sound of it combined with your screaming scared the shit out of him.
He threw his phone in the air and sat there like the soul left his body. "Did I scare you?"
"I think I saw the stars" you started laughing at Percy as you walked toward him. "No like never do that again please."
"Hey," you sat on your legs in front of him on his bed. "No promises" you smiled as you leaned forward and kissed him, which he happily did back. You pushed back into him, laying down on top of him. After a few minutes your phone started ringing from your back pocket. You went to reach for it when Percy grabbed your hand.
"Come on just ignore it" and went back to kissing you. You ignored the phone till it stopped ringing. You went and continued on with what you were previously doing, at least that's what you wanted to do. Right after it stopped ringing it started again. You leaned up from Percy and let out an exasperated and dramatic sigh as you got up and answered the phone.
"Hello" you said harshly.
"Sorry to interrupted you" Nico said. "Jeez."
"Nico did you need something" you said trying to get him to talk quickly.
"Did you forget what day it is" Nico asked.
"Enough with your little riddles what is it?" SPIT IT OUT.
"Its parents day" Nico stated.
"So what, our moms are dead, who cares." Percy almost laughed at your bluntness but he didn't know if it was the time for that.
"Not those parents, godly parents. Dads here." You almost dropped the phone out your hand when he said that.
"Dads there" you asked, voice sounding a little high-pitched.
"Yup, so you might wanna hurry up. Bye." Shit. See the thing is, you weren't necessarily scared of your dad. Maybe a little, he has anger issues. Despite him being Hades, him being your father made him less scary, but you guys still weren't the closest. The only problem is Percy, your boyfriend, and guy you are currently sitting on. He has a hatred for Percy one would not understand and you don't want to know how he would react to him now dating his daughter.
"My dad's here" you said once more. You looked down at Percy who looked a little nervous. "Why are you suddenly nervous about Hades' presence?"
"Because he hates me and I'm sleeping with his daughter."
"Haha. Well, I gotta run, literally. Bye" you said as you quickly pecked him and ran back to your dorms. Not even noticing Poseidon chillin the couch relaxing, and knowing of your presence. It only took 6 minutes to make it back home, that may have been record time. You summed through the door and opened it to see your dad and Nico sitting on opposite sides of each other in the living room.
Nico and your father never had the greatest relationship and it really showed. Ever since his his real sister Bianca died, their relationship was strained. You wondered if she never passed, would your father had liked him more? All you knew was that it was better for everyone if you were around, less awkward. Kind of.
"Hey guys" you said as you slide in the seat next to Nico. He looked kind of nervous, expected when your sitting in front of the god of death, even if he is your father.
"Hello Y/N, me and Nico were just.. talking." It was silent when you walked in.
"Really? About what?" You played into it. You turned and saw Nico suppressing a small smile.
"you know, the usual" Nico said. Code for nothing by the way. You wanted to laugh a little but you didn't let that show.
"I didn't realize my kids were little jokesters" Hades said seriously. "Y/N, did you forget the date today?"
"Um, no" you lied.
"Then why is it you weren't here. What was more important that seeing your father? Hmm?" Your father questioned you. It felt like he knew, but its not like you or anyone you know would've told him. They know his feelings about Percy. And there's actually no way Hades uses instagram. As you were in thought, you may or may not have been quiet a little too long.
"Did you know Aphrodite hasn't shut up about this little love show of hers? Do you know how it felt to find out she was speaking of my daughter and Percy Jackson of all people? And the pictures online on that weird app she showed me? Despicable." Your father rambled while shaking his head. You turned to Nico in shock while you watch him try not to laugh at your possible despair.
"Um, surprise? I guess.." you said unenthusiastically and nervous.
"I'd kill that boy, but it'd be a whole thing with my brother. I'm not in the mood for that family drama." Hades rolled his eyes while speaking. "You have a rather ill choice with men in my opinion. You must hope I don't have a run-in with that boy. And lastly, if he even dares step foot in my realm once more, just remember I don't care if he's your.. boyfriend." He didn't elaborate on what would happen if Percy stepped foot in the underworld again, he didn't need to say another word for you to get the picture of what would happen to him. You were sure he didn't even want to go back in the first place. Unless maybe his mom got kidnapped again, but you know, fat chance.
"Yeah.. gotcha." You said simply. That actually went easier than you thought it would.
"Always, nice to see you both, but I must head out" Hades said as he stood up from his seat.
"Bye dad" you and Nico said at the same time. You both sat in silence as you watched your father walk out the room and disappear back to the underworld. You let out a sigh as you lifted your feet on the couch and leaned over on Nico's shoulder. He leaned his head on yours.
"Next time I'll remember the date and not leave you too alone again, I know its awkward" you said.
"At least he was just focused on you" Nico sighed.
"Yeah, blame Aphrodite for that I guess." You sat up. "And why didn't you get grilled about Will" you said jokingly annoyed.
"Well for starters, maybe because Will isn't like, his mortal enemy." Oh okay.
"Alright bro, no need to get snappy with me."
"Sorry Y/N, just stating facts here" Nico shrugged. "Anyways I was in fact planning to hangout with Will so.." Aww, wait..
"Are you kicking me out again?"
"Sorry, he has to many siblings" Nico said.
"Whatever, I was gonna head back to hang out with Percy anyways" you said as you got up headed it out. Nico shouted a bye from the couch and you shouted it back as you shut the door and made your way to Percy's.
Finally your back. You are currently standing at the door pounding on it like there's no tomorrow. Fifteen seconds later Percy opened the door looking at you wide-eyed.
"How'd it go with your dad" he asked quickly making you laugh. He moved to the side letting you in.
"Oh it went fine, just make sure to stay out of his way and the underworld or, you know" you said knowing you didn't need to continue speaking.
"Sounds just like my brother" you stopped in your tracks. Poseidon, Percy's dad, is currently sitting on the couch.
"Oh, um... hello." You said. Percy chuckled at your awkwardness.
"Don't worry, just cause your dad would like to blast me to bits doesn't mean my dad feels the same about you." you rolled your eyes as Percy said this. Poseidon just laughed at the two.
"I would've said hello to you earlier but you were running out quite fast" what was he.. oh.
"Oh, you were here?" You were just thinking about what if Nico never called you getting to to go home. Now THAT would've been more awkward than having a conversation with your own dad. And for the record, its very awkward.
"Yes I was. Aphrodite would've had a field day" Poseidon joked. You and Percy got a little warm in the face. "Anyways I must be off now, things to do and kingdoms to run, you know how it is." Poseidon walked up to Percy to hug him, he pulled away and ruffled his hair before walking out the door.
"I wish Hades was friendlier like Poseidon."
"Me too."
"Wanna have a movie night" you asked.
"Oh my gods let's go. I'll go make popcorn" Percy said excitedly.
"We're having a Harry Potter movie marathon" you stated as you went to get the first movie ready.
"Yo low-key I could take him in a fight. He's not all that." Percy said as the microwaved beeped letting us know that the popcorn finished.
"That's really interesting Percy"
"You know I could why are you the way you are" Percy was sitting down next to you on the couch, moving close under the blanket.
"You mean why am I so amazing and cool and sexy and hot" you joked.
"I think we should just click play"
You guys stopped paying attention after the first movie.
˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ 𝜗𝜚
@StyxGirl • 5 min
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Liked by deathboynicoo and others... @StyxGirl: someone tell me why Aphrodite is showing my dad my instagram💀💀 @seaweedbrain View comments...
@BeaurengardOnTop: bc we knew Hades was on instagram💀 →@seaweedbrain: @BeaurengardOnTop are you trying to get me killed?? →@BeaurengardOnTop: @seaweedbrain perchance. →@wisegirl: @BeaurengardOnTop YOU CANT JUST SAY PERCHANCE??
@deathboynicoo: she almost got ur boyfriend killed🤦 →@StyxGirl: @deathboynicoo ur boyfriend could be next if u don't watch out🤷‍♀️
˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ 𝜗𝜚
[10:35] AM
When you woke up you were now alone on the couch. You sat up and looked around for Percy when you smelled waffles. The delicious smell gravitated you toward the kitchen.
"Good morning" you greeted Percy. You walked over behind him while he stood at the stove as you wrapped your arms around his waist.
"Good morning sleepyhead" Percy said. You kissed him on his back and jumped on the counter next to the stove.
"What a gentleman, cooking me breakfast." He looked at you confused, making you confused. "What?"
"What makes you think this is for you, I was the hungry one who took initiative" he looked at you like it was obvious.
"You're saying" you swung your arms around "all of this food is for you? You dam near big as hell you know that?"
"Oh I've heard" he winked. You just looked up at the ceiling and sighed, wondering how you got yourself here. "I'm just messing with you, obviously this is for the both of us."
"Thank gods, I was so hungry I wasn't even going to mention the blue waffles." you said as you just picked one up and stuffed it in your mouth.
"Okay, last time I checked we weren't barbarians. Grab a plate" Percy said.
"Ugh what are you my dad" you joked.
"Erm no. I think your dad would actually start a war if he heard you were comparing us" you both just started laughing. After you composed yourself you went and grabbed a plate for your waffle, you proceeded to drown it in syrup, earning a glare from Percy.
"Hey Y/N, don't freak out when I say this but I think there's a waffle hiding in your syrup."
"Oh my god thanks for telling me, I had no idea" you said sarcastically. "Gods forbid I eat the way I like."
"Your allowed to do what you want as long as its not.. never mind. I just forget your so.. special" he paused before he said special, clearly not calling you special the way you would've like. These men.
"Sorry you don't enjoy cuisine the way I do" You rolled eyes as Percy finished getting food and you both sat at the kitchen island to eat. The waffles were really good and didn't need all that syrup by the way. You just liked bothering Percy. You also just liked Percy himself but you didn't need to inflate his ego more (ur dating its okay to say you like him).
..............................................................................................................................
No clue if there's going to be a pt.6, but if have ideas for it lmk🫡
Taglist: @damdemigodishness @katiepotatie @loony-loser @mxtokko <3
329 notes · View notes
tigertales9 · 8 months
Text
Hard Reset III
Pairing: Joe Burrow x Reader
Warnings: 18+ / Smut
Description: This fic covers the week 4 loss to the Titans.
Time/Place: Sunday, Oct. 1, 2023 / Cincinnati, Ohio
A/N: This is the third fic in the Hard Reset series. It's also a shameless sex-fest. I promise there will be more actual plot (and sex!) in the next fic.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Sunday, 10/1/23 (after the week 4 loss to the Titans)
You check your watch as you pace around the kitchen, your mind grasping at what to say to Joe when he gets home. You roll your shoulders to relieve some tension as you think back to the game.
~ ~ ~
The 27-3 loss to the Titans felt like a huge step back after the Monday Night Football win against the Rams. The entire game was a disappointment to put it mildly. Every single phase -- offense, defense, special teams, play calling -- was lackluster as hell. The only positive was Joe's calf injury didn't seem to get re-tweaked, but you never know how it will react from one day to the next. Joe had once again requested you and his parents not greet him if the Bengals lost, so y'all were already in the car heading for the exit when the clock ticked down to 0:00. You beat the team charter flight back by a couple hours, and Joe's parents decided to head home since they knew he wouldn't want company.
~ ~ ~
The sound of the garage door opening pulls you back to the present, your pulse picking up when Joe walks in and locks eyes with you. "Hey," you greet, quickly walking forward to give him a hug. "Hey," he mutters, dropping his bag before wrapping his arms around you. "Sorry you traveled all that way just to see a shitshow," he continues, giving you a look that's half grin/half grimace when you pull back and look up at his face.
"It wasn't a shit …"
"Yes it was," he interrupts, heaving a tired sigh. "Don't sugar-coat it."
"Yes, sir," you mumble. "How do you feel?"
He runs a hand through his hair before answering. "Physically, not too bad. Mentally, like total shit."
You swallow hard and give a quick nod, a little disconcerted that he seems to be looking right through you; before you can think of something to say he speaks up again.
"Listen, Sam's gonna pick me up in a few minutes. We're having a team meeting at his house tonight."
"The whole team?" you ask.
"No, just the Captains and a few other guys." He picks his bag up and heads for the stairs before continuing. "We've gotta figure some shit out, make sure we're on the same page then put it to bed." He pauses halfway up the stairs and finally makes good eye contact with you. "The entire season is on the line; somebody has to light a fire under our asses and …"
"You're just the man to do it," you interject, giving him what you hope looks like an encouraging smile.
"Exactly," he states, before disappearing upstairs.
He reappears a few minutes later wearing sweatpants and a t-shirt, quickly checking his phone when it chimes with a new text. "Sam's here," he says, dropping a kiss on your forehead before heading for the door. "I may be late getting home. Don't wait up."
Your eyebrows head for your hairline as he breezes out the door. "Love you, too," you grumble under your breath after the door closes behind him. You try not to take his abrupt departure personally, but you're feeling a little sorry for yourself when the door slings open and he walks back in. "Did you forget something?" you ask.
"Yeah," he answers, striding up to you. He leans down and gives you a lingering kiss before pulling back. "Love you," he states. "Love you, too," you answer, giving him a big grin as he hurries back out the door. "Telepathic ass," you chuckle once he's gone. "I swear that man can read my mind."
~ ~ ~
A couple hours later you wake up abruptly and sit straight up in bed, your heart pounding for several seconds until you realize the noise that woke you is just Joe in the bathroom brushing his teeth. He eventually walks into the bedroom giving you a sheepish grin when he sees you. "Sorry, didn't mean to wake you up," he mutters, crawling into bed and basically faceplanting into his pillow.
"It's okay," you soothe, turning onto your side to face him; you run your fingernails up and down his bare back, smiling at his muffled groans. "That feels good," he mumbles into his pillow, a shiver running down his spine when you slide your hand into his hair to lightly scratch his scalp.
"Did y'all figure some things out?" you ask, admiring his tall frame which is clad only in a pair of black boxer briefs.
"Mmm-hmm. Mainly that I sucked today and we won't win shit until I get better."
"The whole team sucked today, not just you."
"Thanks for admitting I sucked."
You roll your eyes and give his ample ass a loud smack before rubbing it.
"Don't get me started," he warns.
"Meaning?"
"Meaning I know where this is headed, but I don't feel like having sex tonight."
You withdraw your hand and scoot away from him. "Sorry," you whisper. "I just thought … nevermind."
"Listen," he sighs, flopping over onto his back to stare at the ceiling. "I don't want pity sex, and there's no way you're turned on after how awful I played today."
You narrow your eyes at the slight slur in his speech. "Have you been drinking?"
"A little."
"Then I won't tear your ass up about projecting until you sober up."
"What do you mean projecting?"
"You know exactly what I mean." You take a deep breath before continuing. "We've had this conversation before."
"Refresh my memory."
"Should probably wait until tomorrow. I'm in no mood to sugar-coat it tonight."
"Fuck sugar-coating," he snorts, "tell me what you're thinking."
"Fine." You push up into a sitting position and look down at him, the hallway light providing just enough illumination to make out his petulant expression. "When you lose a game you get really down on yourself, and you project that feeling onto me. But -- like I've said several times before -- the way I feel about you is not determined by whether or not you win fucking football games, okay? If you lose every single game for the rest of your NFL career, I'll still want you more than anything. Why is that so hard to understand?"
"I just …"
"I'm not finished," you interrupt. "I'm starting to think you're the one who doesn't want sex after the team loses, which is fine, but you need to quit blaming it on me." You slide out of bed as you finish your mini tirade. "I'm not sleepy anymore," you state as you head for the door. "I'm gonna go get some work done."
You walk down the hallway to your office, shutting the door behind you before dropping into your desk chair with an annoyed sigh; you click your desk lamp on and run a hand through your hair. "Way to overreact, dumbass," you grumble under your breath, immediately feeling guilty. "You know he always needs extra affirmation after a loss and instead you chewed him out. Better go apologize."
You stand up and head for the door, stopping in your tracks when you hear a soft knock. "Come in," you call, biting your lip as he walks into the room. "I'm sorry," you blurt before he can say anything, quickly closing the distance to wrap your arms around him. "I overreacted."
He returns your hug for several heartbeats before leaning back to lock eyes with you. "You don't need to apologize. I need to stop being an insecure brat every time I lose a damn game."
"You don't really think I lose attraction to you after a loss, right? I used to think you were just teasing, but I seriously can't tell anymore."
He shrugs his broad shoulders, the action causing his forehead curls to bounce. "I'm mostly teasing, but I've been feeling pretty bad about myself lately so I guess I've been fishing for compliments more than usual." He gives you a sheepish smile. "And I was def hoping to have sex tonight. I guess I laid the pity party on a little too thick, though."
"So -- to be clear -- when you said you didn't feel like having pity sex …"
"I really meant I wanted you to seduce me. To show me you still want me even though I played like shit."
"Okay, that's good to know. I mean, that's what I normally do when you get in this mood, but it's starting to feel like I might be boundary stomping."
"You're not boundary stomping." He slides his hands down your back and cups your ass before easily lifting you up, smiling when you wrap your legs around his waist. "If I really didn't want sex I'd let you know, but don't count on that happening anytime soon," he states, punctuating his words with a throaty chuckle that sets off a steady throb of arousal in all the right places.
He walks to your desk chair and drops into it with you straddling his lap, his lips immediately on your neck after he pulls your t-shirt off and drops it on the floor. You lean your head to the side to give him better access, moaning at the feel of his mouth on your neck and his hands on your breasts, his agile fingers teasing you with barely-there touches before pinching and tugging your sensitive nipples just hard enough to make you gasp his name. "You like that?" he whispers against your ear, his hot breath causing a gush of wetness in your core. "Yeah," you whimper, grinding your crotch against his obvious erection as he continues to tease you.
He eventually drops a hand down and rubs your clit through your panties before slipping his fingers inside to play with your wet folds, his deep voice in your ear sending shock waves of pleasure down your spine as he slides a long finger inside you, adding a second finger when you beg for more. "So wet for me," he growls, making a feral noise deep in his throat when you start riding his fingers, slow at first then faster, your breathless whimpers leveling up to louder moans when he latches his pretty lips onto a nipple, his cheeks hollowing out as he sucks on the hardened peak.
"Don't stop!" you urge, biting your lip when he pulls off one nipple and moves to the other, giving it a gentle nip with his teeth before sucking it into his hot mouth. "I'm so close," you whine as he grinds his thumb against your clit while pumping his fingers inside you, a steady stream of whimpers spilling from your lips as your climax hits. You bury your face in his fragrant neck and gasp for breath, feeling lightheaded by the intensity of the orgasm, existing in a state of total bliss for several minutes until your dainty desk chair gives an ominous-sounding creak.
"Uh-oh," you pant, leaning back to lock eyes with him. "I think both of us in this chair is too much."
The chair makes another, even louder creak and Joe raises his eyebrows. "Why do you have such a flimsy-ass desk chair?"
"Because it's cute and comfy. Plus it's perfectly fine when it's just me sitting in it."
"You calling me fat?" he asks playfully, sticking his bottom lip out in an exaggerated pout.
"No, you goober," you giggle, easing yourself off of his lap to settle on your knees on the floor between his manspread thighs. "You're tall and muscular and big," you state. "Deliciously big," you continue, ghosting your fingers over his impressive erection while licking your lips. "Let's lose these," you whisper, pulling his undies off and tossing them to the side.
You take your time enjoying the view before dropping open-mouthed kisses up the long length of his thick thighs, his soft, blonde leg hair tickling your lips as you work your way up to his crotch; he sucks your essence off of his fingers as he watches you through heavy-lidded eyes, the look on his face making you want to do deliciously naughty things to him.
"You're gorgeous," you whisper, sliding your hands over his abs, smiling when his muscles tighten under your touch. The heat radiating off of his big, hard body makes you more than a little lightheaded, and his scent -- a purely masculine musk -- literally makes your mouth water. You decide to let him know. "You make my mouth water," you groan, continuing to drop kisses near, but not quite on, his hard cock.
"No I don't," he scoffs, color rushing into his cheeks at the compliment.
It always amazes you when he gets shy about his good looks; in his mind he's still a nerdy guy, and he's not quite comfortable with the fact that he grew up to be a total sex god. You give him a sultry grin as you double down.
"You 100 percent make my mouth water. Want me to show you?"
He studies your face for a bit before responding. "Yeah … show me."
"Okay." You take your time gathering the excess saliva on your tongue before opening your mouth, letting the spit drizzle down on his shaft while holding eye contact with him. "So fucking hot," he hisses, his cock twitching as you lean down and flatten your tongue against it, licking base to tip before lapping at the precum on the plump, velvety head. The sensual, uniquely masculine taste has another flood of saliva pouring into your mouth; you lean back and lock eyes with him as you gather the moisture again, this time spitting it in your hand before wrapping your fist around his thick shaft, jacking him with smooth, steady strokes for a minute before dropping your head back down to tease him with your lips and tongue, slowly replacing your hand with your mouth as you take him deep, your gag reflex firing a few times before you hit just the right angle to deep throat him.
He buries his hands in your hair as you pleasure him, the words of praise spilling from his lips interspersed with soft grunts and groans that go straight to your core. Tears roll down your cheeks, and he brushes them away then lifts his fingers to his mouth, licking the salty liquid before hissing in pleasure as you lightly scratch your fingernails over his balls.
"Shit, babe, hold up a sec," he grits out. "I don't wanna cum yet." You pull off of his erection with an audible pop, wiping a hand over the spit and precum coating your chin while panting to catch your breath. "Just let me know what you need," you offer, your pulse picking up at the feral look on his face. He loudly sucks his plump bottom lip into his mouth, the action and noise so suggestive that you feel your core throbbing in unison with your racing heartbeat.
"I need to taste you," he purrs, his voice husky with desire. "Then I need to fuck you."
The throbbing in your core escalates, and you cup a hand over your soaked panties to try and ease the almost-painful ache; his gaze flicks down to your crotch before returning to your face, the carnal promise in his smile making your pleasure points hum with anticipation.
"How sturdy is your desk?" he asks, eyeing it as if sizing it up for a naughty, vigorous romp.
"Not sturdy," you mutter, gasping in surprise when he quickly stands up and reaches down, wrapping his hands around your waist and picking you up before striding for the door; you wrap your legs around him and bury your face in his neck as he walks to the bedroom.
He sits you on the edge of the bed and slides your panties off in one smooth motion, dropping to his knees on the floor between your spread thighs; you lean back on your elbows and watch as he lowers his head and flutters his tongue over your clit before plunging his tongue inside you, the noise you make causing him to lock eyes with you as he repeats the action. "I'm gonna cum in ten seconds if you keep that up," you whimper, biting your lip when he lifts your legs over his broad shoulders. "Then let's slow it down," he purrs against your most sensitive flesh, the vibrations from his deep voice causing a shiver of pleasure to shoot through you. "I'm gonna take my time," he continues, dropping delicate kisses and licks on your aching folds while avoiding your clit.
After what seems like an eternity on the edge, you decide to take matters into your own hands; you slide a hand in his messy curls and give a tug, using the leverage to grind your pussy against his face in a way you know he loves. "You drive me fucking crazy," he growls once you let him come up for air, his eyes dark with lust when he raises his head to look at you. "I'm seriously about to cum," he grits out, his breath catching in his throat when you quickly lift your legs off of his shoulders and slide off the bed, straddling him and reaching a hand down to line his cock up with your slick entrance before taking him balls deep.
He makes a noise that's half groan/half growl and 100% primal when your core clenches his thick length; you dig your fingers into his muscular shoulders and start riding him hard, whimpering on every down stroke at the feel of him bottoming out. He leans you back until your back is pressed against the edge of the bed, the new angle causing him to hit your sweet spot on every stroke. "Just like that!" you pant, moaning when he drops a hand down to tease your clit. "Fuck, baby," he hisses as his climax hits, the hot spurts coating your core as he pinches your clit with just the right amount of pressure to pull your trigger.
The sound of your mutual heavy breathing is the only noise you hear for several minutes; when you finally open your eyes and look at him, you have to smile at how totally fucked out he looks. "I think I passed out for a sec," you pant. "Me too," he chuckles.
~ ~ ~
Thirty minutes later -- after a shared shower where both of you laughingly complained about your shaky legs -- y'all are lying in bed, trading yawns and agreeing to sleep late the next morning.
You're just on the edge of sleep when he speaks up. "Babe? You still awake?"
"Yeah."
"Can I ask you something?"
"Sure."
The silence stretches out for a minute before he speaks up again. "It's kind of stupid, I guess. Maybe I'll keep it to myself."
"What is it?" you ask, sitting up so you can look down at him.
He scrunches his perfect nose up. "We have two games left before the bye week."
"Yeah, Cardinals and Seahawks."
"If I play really awful like I did today, and we lose both of those games, will you still secretly marry me during the bye?"
You give a snort of laughter before you realize he's not laughing with you. "Are you serious?"
"A little, yeah."
You take a deep breath before responding. "Remember that convo we had earlier tonight when I said if you lose every single game for the rest of your NFL career, I'll still want you more than anything?"
"Yes, ma'am," he mumbles.
"Well, let me drive that point home a little harder." You brush his curls off of his forehead and give him a smile before continuing. "If you play like total dogshit in both games, throw twenty picks, lose fifty to nothing, and cut a huge fart in the post-game pressers, I'll still want you more than anything. I can't wait to secretly -- and eventually not-so-secretly -- marry you. Does that answer your question?"
"Yeah," he laughs along with you for a minute before quieting down. "Sorry I'm being such a needy baby lately."
"You're being human instead of a robot," you soothe, leaning down to press a kiss on his lips. "It's a nice change," you say cheekily, giggling when he flips you over and lands a loud smack on your ass. "Don't get me started," you echo his words from earlier.
He rolls you back over and pushes up on an elbow, looking down at you in the dim lighting. "Meaning?"
"Meaning I know where this is headed," you purr, licking your lips just before his mouth captures yours.
510 notes · View notes
constantmourning · 7 months
Text
Funny Business
[Buggy x Fem!Reader]
Summary: You take care of Buggy while he's just a head, he returns the favor.
Word Count: 5.4k
Warnings: NSFT, 18+, biting, unprotected sex, inappropriate use of devil fruit (lol), sex in the woods, oral (f receiving) (Let me know if I forgot any!)
A/N: I saw @ah-finally make a post that gave me this idea! I will link it once i find it again. I started writing this over a month ago I think? The pacing isn't my favorite (pacing isn't ever my favorite), but i love this fic with my whole being, i hope y'all do too!
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"Stay still!" You hissed, trying to stay quiet. Buggy did not want to listen. "I don't want to drown you!"
Buggy scoffed, "It doesn't seem like it right now!" Buggy hissed back, his voice low.
You pulled Buggy back from the water and furrowed your brows at him. "I'm being serious. Buggy, I wanna wash your hair, I really don't want to harm you… Do you trust me?"
Buggy snorted, "I have no reason to."
You gasped in shock. "I offered to take care of you when everyone wants nothing to do with you–"
"You didn't have to do that."
"I know!" You almost yelled. "Buggy…" you pinched the bridge of your nose. "I just want you to be comfortable. Greasy hair isn't always comfortable. And, anyway, this is a bonding experience."
Buggy's eyes narrowed. "Do you realize who you're talking to? You are a Straw Hat and I'm Buggy." When you only nodded and smiled Buggy groaned. "You can wash my hair, under one condition." You perked up. "Do not put my damn head under that faucet."
"Of course!" You were excited. "May I?" You questioned him, motioning towards his bandana. When he nodded you slowly undid it and took it off of him. Buggy watched you closely as you wet your hands and then wet his hair. You were so gentle. Buggy couldn't recall the last time someone was that gentle. At least, he didn't want to anyway. You softly hummed as you rubbed shampoo into his hair.
"We don't have showers on board, but I do like to keep hygiene products with me. I wash my hair like this a lot." Your eyes focused on Buggy's hair and all the spots that needed scrubbing.
"You take a whore's bath?" He laughed.
You froze before massaging the shampoo deep into his scalp. "Yeah, I guess? If you want to call it that…"
It was silent between the two of you. Not too awkward. At least not for you. You were focused on cleaning him up and hoping having clean hair would make him less angry. You stood up to get the back of Buggy's head, and forgetting you could walk around him and get it that way, you leaned over him and contorted into an uncomfortable position, but scrubbed away regardless.
Buggy, not saying anything, stared and stared. He was eye level with your chest and couldn't help but look at your cleavage while you washed his hair. Your shirt dipped down, revealing cleavage anyway, but with your position in that moment, it was way more visible and quite literally the only thing Buggy could look at it. Your humming resumed and Buggy sighed. He couldn't lie, he was content at that moment. The feeling of your fingers gently getting into his scalp, your soft humming, and your boobs right in his face. What more could someone need?
You leaned back and sat back down in the chair you had pulled up to the sink. Buggy's eyes quickly cut from your chest back to your eyes. You, ignoring that, turned the water back on. "I'm going to need to rinse your hair now." You look at Buggy with a curious expression, "Can I at least lean you back into the faucet? I promise I'll be careful!" Before Buggy could protest you hit him with, "You can look at my boobs while I do it."
Buggy was contemplating, before finally saying, "Okay."
You smiled at him and stood back up again. You gently grabbed him, placing your hands at his jawline, and you paused. A knock came from the door. Your eyes widened and you looked at Buggy, watching as he opened his mouth to talk. Immediately, you covered his mouth with one hand.
"Yeah?" You asked loudly, voice slightly shaking.
"Hm?" A groggy Zoro's voice alerted you. He would launch you off the boat along with Buggy if he knew you were being so nice to the man that had tried to kill him. "Are you okay?"
Your eyes never left Buggy's. "Yes! I'm fine. Just washing up!" You didn't say what you were washing though. "Y'know, just my regular whore's bath."
Buggy smiled under your hand. You could feel it. Zoro grumbled. "Whatever, just no funny business." He walked off.
You sighed and uncovered Buggy's mouth. You continued as if nothing had happened. Buggy did not want to leave it alone though. He thought it was too fun to do that. "Regular whore's bath eh?”
You do not answer him. Instead, you slowly, and ever so gently, leaned his head back in the water. You held him steady with one hand, while you rinsed his hair with the other. You leaned over him and felt his stare burning onto your skin. You occupied yourself with more humming and finished faster than you thought you would. You pulled his head from the faucet and grabbed a towel.
“Care if I dry your hair a little bit? I don’t want you to get my covers wet.”
“Your covers?”
“Yeah, you’re coming to my bed with me, aren’t you? I figure I could tuck you away in my room and then grab some food. I’m sure you’re hungry.”
Buggy lit up before narrowing his eyes, “You’re being awfully nice.”
“I know, it’s weird being treated like a person, huh?” You quipped back at him, smiling. “Now, can I dry your hair?”
Buggy sighed and mumbled, "Yeah." You smiled at him and tenderly placed the towel to his hair and dried it as much as possible. At least it wasn't dripping wet anymore. You threw the towel aside and picked up Buggy's head. You warned him to be quiet as you exited the bathroom. You walked to your room and closed your door. You placed Buggy on your bed and smiled at him.
"Sanji's a great cook, you're going to love his food! I'm gonna go grab whatever leftovers there are. I'll be right back!"
You didn't give Buggy any time to respond. You quickly left your room, shutting the door behind you. You walked towards the kitchen and looked for any leftovers. As you were grabbing a plate you were stopped.
"You're up late. What are you doing?" Sanji startled you.
You turned to him and inhaled sharply. "I'm still hungry! Just grabbing some extra food. You know how it is." You patted your stomach and gave him a toothy grin. "Your food is to die for."
Sanji narrowed his eyes, "Why do you have two forks?"
"Because I don't like mixing the foods and flavors. I need one fork for fish and one for the sides." You spoke matter of fact. As if he should have known that. "Duh."
You did not let Sanji ask any other questions. You bolted back to your room and opened the door. You shut it quietly and locked it. Just in case. You didn't need any 'funny business' unfolding. Not if you could help it. Buggy was sitting where you left him. You approached him with the plate and sat beside him.
"Two forks?" Buggy questioned you.
"One for you, one for me. Duh." You playfully rolled your eyes and pulled your legs up to you, crossing them and placing the plate on them. "Now, I don't want this to be awkward-"
"You just washed my hair, and I'm just a head. This is already awkward, I'm afraid."
"You're right!" You agreed enthusiastically. "It probably can't get more awkward." You picked the fork up and stabbed at the fish. "Open wide, I promise I won't gag you with this eating utensil."
"Oh, that's very suspicious." Buggy rolled his eyes. "If you gag me with that fork I'm going to-"
"What? Bite me?" You scoffed. "Actually, that'd be kind of–" You stopped yourself. That caught Buggy's attention though.
"Kind of what?" He raised his brow.
"Shut up and let me feed you."
Buggy did not protest. He was starving. You placed the fork in his mouth and pulled it back slowly. Buggy's eyes were focused on you. And your eyes were focused on the food at hand. You took a bite yourself, on a different fork, and then grabbed Buggy's fork and fed him some more. Buggy's eyes never left you. It was honestly making it way more awkward when you thought it couldn't get more awkward…
"May I help you?" You questioned him, feeling uneasy all the sudden.
"You could keep feeding me." He gave you a sweet smile. You melted, almost immediately. Buggy took note of that, also immediately. "You know…" Buggy started, keeping you from feeding him further. "You don't have to be this nice."
"You know," you mimicked his tone, "I can't feed you when you're talking." You grabbed the plate and set it beside you, uncrossing your legs and staring at Buggy as you found a comfortable position.
"You could–" Buggy snorted, "it wouldn't be pleasant though."
"I think that would really get me bitten."
"You must have a thing for that." Buggy started, nonchalantly. "Someone biting you."
You could feel yourself heating up. "Why would you even–" You stopped yourself. "I can see why actually. So what? It's not the worst thing one could do to me? I mean, in a weird way. Not a violent way–"
"No need to explain yourself, Straw Hat."
"Don't call me that." You huffed.
"But that's what you are. You're part of Luffy's crew, right?"
You pouted at Buggy. "Yes, but that's not the point. You keep saying it in a condescending tone. Like I'm not good enough because I'm a Straw Hat."
Buggy didn't say anything else. You finished eating and feeding him. You set the plate down beside your bed and looked back at Buggy. Who was looking dead at you. You leaned back against the bed frame and watched Buggy. You noticed his face makeup was smeared from all the stuff going on and you stood up.
"What?" Buggy questioned you. "What are you doing now?"
"Can I do something?" You pulled out your red lipstick and smiled at him widely. "I wanna fix–"
Buggy groaned. "You keep asking to do these things as if I could do anything other than bite you, which it seems like you would enjoy, so why do you keep asking?"
"Consent is nice, y'know." You shrugged at his questions. "I don't know, I don't wanna overstep any boundaries."
Buggy sighed again, "You can fix whatever you wanted to fix. No complaints here."
"Yes!" You exclaimed excitedly. You rushed back to the bed and Buggy looked at you with wide eyes. You weren't about to be any less gentle though. You grabbed your pillow and propped his head up on it, before grabbing your lipstick and getting as close to him as humanly possible. You, once again, were laser focused on Buggy. His eyes watched you as you bit down on and stuck out your tongue. You grabbed the nape of his neck and put the lipstick on his lips very carefully.
"Do you just kinda–" You paused and narrowed your eyes, and then motioned as if you were smearing lipstick on your own face.
Buggy laughed. "If that's what you think will give it that effect, knock yourself out."
Your lips pursed and eyes narrowed even more, you slowly nodded. You were thinking hard. Harder than ever. Buggy's bright eyes watched yours and when he licked his lips you furrowed your brows. "What?" You asked, pulling back from him.
"You look nice, y'know?" Buggy swallowed hard, his Adam's apple bobbing. Your eyes widened in shock.
"Me? A Straw Hat?" You gasped, placing a hand on your chest. You were hiding nervousness with humor.
"I'm serious. It's hot when get so focused on something, and don't even get me started on how attentive–"
You almost jumped when you realized he was being completely serious. "Stop." Your eyes were wide and full of something Buggy couldn't read. "Let me finish your look before you go saying anything like that."
Buggy didn't want to shut up, but he also didn't like that you were suddenly so… upset. He couldn't help but think you were off put by him suddenly. You had been doing all of this for him, and what if he blew it?
You were positively burning up. You were sure your hands were shaking at that point and you could not think straight. You were so close to Buggy and you were realizing more and more just how kissable he was. You wanted to scream. But that would alert everyone and you didn't want someone to bust in on you in that position. You stopped, your eyes locking with Buggy's and you said the first thing popped into your head.
"Buggy?" You were terrified. But as soon as Buggy hummed in response (you did not register he seemed agitated), the words fell from your mouth "Can I kiss you?"
Buggy was shocked. "What?"
You immediately pulled all the way back from him and stared at him with a shocked look. You swallowed hard and let out a nervous laugh. "I'm just– Sorry, I may have misread–"
"No you didn't." Buggy wanted you close to him again. "You can kiss me."
Your heart jumped into your throat. You could feel it beating against your ribcage and butterflies were circling in your stomach. You were sure you were about to catch fire. You leaned down and grabbed a hold of his jawline. Buggy was getting antsy. You were not moving fast enough and he could not do anything about it. But as soon as you leaned down to him and pressed your lips to his… you were both like starved animals.
His fresh makeup was smearing all over your face and you had no cares. His tongue traced your bottom lip and you, without hesitation, parted your lips letting him in your mouth. Buggy wanted to grab you, hold you in his arms, know it was real… and you? You were absolutely content with just his head. You were unaware he needed to know that.
When you pulled away, you were gasping for air. Your chest was tight and your head was spinning. You were conflicted. You were anxious and you looked at Buggy with confusion.
"Uh, did I…?"
You shook your head, "No! That was… I haven't been kissed like that in a while. I just– I hadn't expected this to turn out this way… Buggy, I like you a lot."
"But?" He groaned, expecting it to go down hill.
"But what? There is no but. I genuinely like doing this stuff for you. Luffy saved my life, and I feel like I owe him. But, you? God, Buggy, I think I'd leave that for you." You whispered the words as if someone could hear you.
Buggy was wide eyed. "Oh?" He smiled. "Well, I was thinking, I could give you another reason to leave." When finished the sentence your brow cocked. "I wanna repay you. You have been exceptionally nice and very gentle, delicate. I haven't felt that in… a while. It's the least I can do."
You cocked your head. "How?" You were genuinely oblivious. Buggy's eyes dropped from yours, to your legs and it still didn't seem to click.
"Let's just say," Buggy smiled, "I want to figure out if I like you better than that chef's food."
Your eyes were wide once again when it clicked. "Oh!" You blinked a couple times, absolutely no thoughts in your head for a moment. You had malfunctioned, it had seemed, and your silence was loud. You spoke up before Buggy could misread the silence. "Okay."
"Okay?" Buggy questioned you.
"I mean, yeah?" You were questioning yourself mostly. "Yeah!" You grew more enthusiastic. "You really wanna, y'know… go down on me when you're just… a head?"
"I see no better opportunity, baby." Buggy winked at you. Your stomach flipped.
"When Luffy saved me, I never imagined this happening, I'll be honest." You stood up from Buggy and began to take your pants off.
"What?" Buggy snorted, "A head giving you head?"
You wanted to say 'duh', but you refrained. You kicked your pants across the room and pulled at your shirt. Buggy sat (almost) patiently, waiting for you to come back to bed. You sucked in air and fidgeted.
"Shirt off?" You asked, as if it was even a question.
"Duh." Buggy mocked your earlier duh, from when you were feeding him. "Unless you aren't comfortable." Buggy knew what it was like to be self conscious.
"Let me get settled first." Your voice was soft, a whisper. You slid your panties off and stepped out of them. You inhaled sharply and made your way back to bed. You lied on the bed and grabbed Buggy's head, placing him on your stomach.
"C'mon, I'm dying for dessert, baby."
You let out a laugh and pushed yourself up the headboard. You spread your legs slightly and placed Buggy between them. As soon as he was down there you pulled your shirt off. Buggy's eyes were on your chest immediately. Your face prickled with more heat and you refrained from covering yourself.
"When I get my body back…" Buggy's eyes were full of lust.
Your hands gripped at the sheets and your eyes averted his gaze. Buggy, while you were distracted, dove in head first. His tongue began to lap at you. You gasped, not expecting him at that moment. Buggy smiled against you. You, before getting too foggy, decided to help him. He didn't have any hands at the time, so you slid your hand down your stomach and used your index and pointer finger to part your lips for him. Buggy immediately went to town.
Your hips gently rocked forward and your free hand went to your mouth. Buggy's tongue swirled around your clit and your jaw clenched. Your hips jutted upwards slightly and stayed there, giving Buggy a better angle. He was being just as attentive as you were earlier. His nose hit your clit and you were unraveling already. Your hand gripped your mouth as you moaned for him. Your hand moved from your mouth briefly, you needed him to know how he made you feel.
"Buggy–" You tried to stay as quiet as possible. "Fuck," you were breathless. "I'm gonna–" Everything was tense and hot and bubbling over. You bucked your hips one last time and came undone from his tongue. You covered your mouth one last time and bit into your palm. Buggy continued to lap at you through your high. His movements slowed but he still kept going.
Your hips fell onto the bed and you lied there, Buggy finally stopped and you caught your breath. You were sprawled out on the bed, Buggy's head still between your legs. Your eyes locked with his and you could tell he was smiling. You sighed and leaned forward, picking him up and resting him on your abdomen. Your breathing was slow and ragged. Buggy was pleased with himself. You shut your eyes for a moment and collected yourself. Buggy watched you, waiting for your next move. He was curious to know what you were thinking. If you were willing to really leave with him…
"Buggy…?" Your brows furrowed. He hummed (this time not agitated), and you continued, "If I somehow survive Arlong… I promise you–"
"Hold on." Buggy interrupted you. "I don't want you to say something you don't mean because you just orgasmed."
"No, no," you opened your eyes to look at him, hoping he'd take you more seriously with eye contact. "Buggy, I'm going to live and I'm going to leave with you." Buggy took it all in. “You don’t have to say anything right now…” You smiled at him. “I need sleep and you do too.” You moved Buggy beside you and placed him on your pillow, and you rolled over onto your side, staring at him. “Goodnight.”
“Goodnight.” Buggy whispered as you closed your eyes.
Sleep was much needed. Unknown to you, Buggy stayed up for a little while longer, watching you. He wanted nothing more than to hold you so close and know it was all real. He wondered briefly what he had done to deserve someone like you… So nice, caring, and gentle. He didn’t think about it too long; he decided to sleep as well.
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Buggy’s head was on Sanji’s hip. You had tried to get them to let you hold him, but Zoro seemed to be onto something, so you did not protest when Sanji told you he had it.
When you had made it to Arlong Park fear and anxiety was at an all time high. You were capable of fighting, but you had never fought anyone like the Fishmen. Not by a long shot. The smoke bombs began to go off inside and Luffy busted open the gates of the park. You were beside Usopp when hell broke loose. You watched as he reared back and shot something, hitting one of the fishmen in the face effortlessly. Your eyes widened, Usopp grabbed you when the fishman began to chase him.
“Usopp!” You started to run as well, “I need to stay back– I have to help!” Usopp did not listen. You were both running through the woods at that point, you could not turn around and be collateral damage.
“Run!” Was the only thing Usopp responded with. “Split up! He’s after me, not you! I’ll find you later, I promise.”
You did not hesitate to take off running away from Usopp. You wanted to try to find your way back, to get Buggy, but you did not know your way around. You reached a good, healthy distance from the fishman chasing Usopp and froze. You turned a circle and realized how lost you were. You groaned.
“How the fuck do I find Buggy now?” You threw your head back.
Your legs ached, your lungs burned. You huffed and crossed your arms. You started to walk in an unknown direction, and hoped it was leading you somewhere. You heard a crunch of leaves from ahead of you and you froze again. This time from fear. Your entire body tensed and you kept from calling out, just in case it was someone wanting to kill you.
It could be Usopp, you thought to yourself. Something touched your back and your jaw clenched. You turned around slowly and a disembodied, gloved hand waved at you. You immediately lit up. The hand moved from around you and you looked over your shoulder, following its movements. It disappeared behind some trees. You heard a ‘pop’ and footsteps again. You turned to face the steps and Buggy walked out from behind a tree.
“Buggy!” You were running for him instantly. You leaped onto him and wrapped your arms around him. “Buggy…” You buried your face in his neck and Buggy relaxed against you. You felt it. “I tried to stay back, Usopp dragged me out, I don’t think he wanted me getting hurt. I didn’t know how to get back, I wanted to get back–”
“Whoa!” Buggy’s arms wrapped around you, holding you tightly. He did not want to let you go. Not yet. Not ever. "We're here now." His hand grabbed your shirt. It was your turn to relax against him.
"I didn't want you to think I was running away from you," You pulled away and looked at him.
Buggy could have sworn his heart fluttered. He inhaled sharply and looked down at you. Thoughts from the night you two had before came flooding back. Buggy had promised when he got his body back–
"I know, uh," You pulled away, fidgeting slightly, "we're in the middle of nowhere in these woods, and Usopp is most definitely looking for me, but all I can think about is the other night and you…"
Buggy was smirking immediately. "You aren't thinking about fucking in these woods are you, Straw Hat?"
Your face prickled with heat. "I'm just thinking about fucking." You nervously laughed. "So if you happen to know a place–"
Buggy did not let you finish. He was on you in an instant. He cupped your face and kissed you, ravenously. He held you as close as possible, hands pulling you as close to him as possible. Your arms wrapped around him and you held him just as tight. As soon as Buggy pulled away you gasped, looking at him wide eyed.
“I'm going to be honest, I've probably been hard since I gave you head.” Buggy looked at you as if you were everything to him. “We could find-”
“We could fuck here.” You were breathless. “Just, uh, maybe lay your jacket down?” You wanted nothing more than to be railed. You needed it. You didn't care if Usopp happened to find you or not. You didn't care about anything other than Buggy.
Buggy was quick to remove his jacket and throw it down. He motioned towards it, as if to show it off and you giggled. You launched yourself back into Buggy’s arms and kissed him again. His tongue darted into your mouth and you groaned.
Before you knew it you were laid down on his jacket, Buggy’s thigh between your legs and his arms caging you in. Then, your hands were cupping his face, and the both of you were as close as close could be. You pulled back from kissing him and pressed your forehead to his.
“Having second thoughts?” Buggy became serious.
“Never,” you pouted, wondering why he even felt you would be. “I wasn't lying, when I said I’d leave Luffy's crew for you. It's still true.”
“Then what's on your mind?”
“I owe you, don't you think I should return the favor?” You cocked your head to the side.
“Baby, as much as I’d love for you to suck my cock, I need to fuck you.”
“Fuck,” you whispered, “I need you too.” Your voice was soft and you sounded deprived. You were deprived. You wanted nothing more than for him to take you right then and there. You needed him to do that.
You saying that you needed him, that was all it took. The look of need on your face, the soft glint in your eyes, the way you bit the inside of your lip… Buggy was also ready to rip his clothes off. He did want nothing more than to take time with you, but that would have to wait. The look in his eyes was suddenly feral, rabid. The way you stared up at him from your position under him was breathtaking. He needed more of that.
“I promise,” Buggy bent down to kiss you, and began to speak in between kisses, “whenever we get back to my ship I'll take my time with you.” He pulled back and placed his forehead to yours. “But for now-”
“Please,” you began to beg, “just fuck me…”
With that, Buggy was ripping your clothes off. He was pulling at your pants while you slid your top off. You lied there beneath him, wearing nothing but panties, breathing heavily. The look in Buggy's eyes was darker and suddenly much more lustful. His fingers crept under the waistband of your panties and he began to slowly pull them down. The cool air hit the sensitive skin and you gasped.
Buggy moved his gloved hand up to his mouth, removing the glove with his teeth. He spit it out beside you and chills ran down your spine. Your breathing became even heavier. His, now bare, hand moved back towards your pussy and he slowly pushed a finger inside of you.
“I wanna test something,” he mumbled, moving closer to you, “before we get to the main event.”
His pace quickened, and another finger was pushed inside of you. But that wasn't what he wanted to test. You were becoming too hot to even think about what it could be though. Buggy kissed your neck and down to your collarbone. That's when you felt it, his teeth sinking into your skin. He nibbled and bit at your skin and your hips bucked. You began to scratch at his forearms.
“Buggy!” You helped out, loudly. His fingers sped up a little more, and between that and the biting, you were sent over the edge. You were pleading, begging at that point. Your eyes screwed shut and your nails raked down his arms. You yelled out for him again as you came undone. The pit in your stomach unraveled and your hips followed his fingers as he pulled them out. “Buggy…” Your voice was softer than before.
Buggy mocked your tone, repeating your name to you. He looked down at you lovingly though. Love and lust filled him. He was sure it was mostly lust, but he was also sure he loved the way you said his name and reacted to him. He was sure he loved you. He just wasn't sure he was ready to say anything about that. So, he did the next best thing.
“Are you ready now?” He whispered in your ear, nibbling on your earlobe. You nodded, causing Buggy to briefly remove himself from you and quickly undress himself.
He positioned himself back over you. You kissed him again and brought your knees up, spreading your legs slightly. Buggy kissed back, he kissed you like he needed you. Like you were the air he had to breathe. You were sure in that moment, you loved him. You had come to the conclusion it was a possibility, but then? You were sure.
Buggy thrusted, his hips hitting yours. One of his hands gripped your thigh and his other one held himself steady above you. You gasped and gripped his back. You leaned up and kissed his neck as he thrusted again. Buggy let out a groan. You wrapped your legs around him and you were sure you couldn't get much closer. But that didn't stop you from trying. You were tangled together and neither of you were slowing down.
Buggy mumbled your name, a mantra, in your ear. He was getting close. You were too.  Buggy's hips were rocking against yours, the sound of skin hitting skin echoing throughout the forest. If Usopp hadn't found you yet, you were sure he heard you. You couldn't bring yourself to care though.
“Buggy,” you whined, nails dragging down his back. “I need to- Fuck, I need you-”
“I'm gonna-”
You were both mumbling messes. Buggy finally said something coherent. “Where?”
“Inside.” Your eyes shut again. Your hips rocked with his and you came undone again.
As soon as your orgasm hit, you felt Buggy come inside of you. He didn't even think about arguing with you on the place he came. His thrusts slowed and became sloppier, before coming to a complete stop and both of you lying there.
Buggy let himself fall slightly. More of his weight on top of you. You were both sweaty and sticky, and you didn't care. You wanted nothing more than to be there with him. If the fear of being caught were not so real, you would have stayed there forever with him.
Your legs fell from Buggy and hit the ground. Buggy pulled out of you, and he began to stand up. “Can't really clean up here, might need to find uh-”
“Well,” you started, “Arlong’s Park isn't too far-” you tried to sound serious.
Buggy, who was pulling his pants up, froze. “Very funny, Straw Hat.”
“Oh,” you feigned hurt, beginning to get up and get dressed yourself, “I didn't think I was a Straw Hat anymore…” Buggy lit up at the realization. “What? You think I was gonna hit it and get it?” You smiled at Buggy, “You're stuck with me now, Buggy!”
Buggy smiled and picked his jacket up off the ground, and placed it over your shoulders.
“That… I think I can live with that.”
You kissed Buggy quickly before looking around and placing your hands on your hips, “Okay really, I don't know my way out of here…”
“Don't worry,” Buggy began to walk ahead of you, “I'm more than capable of getting us out of here.”
You believed him. You trusted him. So you nodded, and began to follow him. You grabbed his hand and Buggy faltered momentarily. He looked back at you and all you did was smile. Buggy smiled back and turned to face ahead of him. He was absolutely positive being ‘stuck’ with you was going to be a great thing.
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maximotts · 1 year
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i feel like cowboy wanda would be so gentle the first few times she has sex with you bc she’s worried she’ll hurt you and scare you off but eventually she loses control a bit and manhandles you into position and when she pins you down, you moan and then the most DEVILISH smile spreads across her face
Ooo okay okay it's interesting you brought this up because I've been thinking about their first encounter a bit lately! We'll ignore that this turned into a whole fic, okay? I love them sm Also this isn't really edited because it was supposed to be a short answer and now it's uhm.. not short, so forgive any typos
18+ only please . wc: 2.7k . cw: first meeting hookup, drinking, dirty talk, oral, fingering, v light spanking, lap sits, possessiveness, Wanda being smitten, the pickup truck sex a lot of y'all have been asking me about that I said was coming, morning after with Wanda because she's as proper as she is filthy
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Basically right now I have their first time more as a hookup where bunny is new to town and goes out to a bar one night to maybe make friends and see the environment, but then she meets Wanda and her group of friends who are all more than welcoming and you're having a great time hanging out with them.
But your eyes keep drifting to Wanda. Of course Wanda notices and, being the smooth talker she is, starts flirting with the new girl. She buys you as many drinks as you want which, end up being stronger than you're used to, but your nerves keep you ordering more. When she finally slips an arm around you, cornering you in the booth you'd only just plopped yourself into, you're more than ready for Wanda to kiss you— and kiss you she does.
You're shy by nature, never having made out with anyone in a bar, much less with a girl you'd only known for a few hours, but Wanda's thumb brushing over your cheek while she bites down on your bottom lip has you forgetting everything you're used to which admittedly, isn't much. Somehow she's pulled your thighs over her own, toying with the stretchy hem of the form-fitting skirt you'd decided to wear last minute. When she touches a particularly sensitive spot, you shiver and Wanda chuckles, "You cold, darlin'? Pretty as your arms are, I'll let you borrow my jacket if it'd help."
And so the night goes on with Wanda's thick denim jacket slung over your shoulders, her arm around your waist wherever the two of you walk. Normally you'd hate the presumptive way the cowgirl was handling you, as if she owned you already, but you'd be damned if you didn't admit you wanted her to stake her claim. So, in your slightly inebriated state, you took a leap, "Wands, I'm sleepy..."
Which catches her attention immediately. "Well now," Wanda pulls you close then, fingers carefully treading the line between caressing your hip and groping your ass; it would be the first time she whispers in your ear, but it'll never stop being insanely hot. "I hope you're telling me because you're going to let me take you home. I'd be real sad leaving tonight without you."
You wish your giggle of a reply didn't sound so girlish and naïve, but in hindsight, you had no idea the sheer intensity you were in for. "Only if you promise to behave yourself."
She's driven about halfway back to her house before she has to pull over; technically it was her land, pulled over to the side of the winding road and turning her truck engine off. "I know I promised to take you home, I still will, but I can't take another second not having my hands on you."
It takes you back a little; all you'd been doing was scratching over her jeans while you stared at the woman driving, but you weren't going to argue with her. "I don't really-"
"I've wanted you on my lap since I laid eyes on you. Get over here." Thankfully she doesn't have to convince you any farther, holding back a groan as you straddled her legs, skirt riding up inch by inch. It was a tight squeeze with you between her and the steering wheel, but Wanda hardly noticed once you started kissing her. This time was impossibly hotter, Wanda's tongue taking control of the kiss before moving on to shamelessly leave marks along your jaw and neck.
And Wanda is too good at getting your clothes out of the way, leaving you topless with record speed, squeezing at your breasts roughly while you struggled just to keep up with her mouth. "What if someone sees..."
The brunette only starts toying with your nipples, relishing in the way it got you rolling your hips. "It's pitch dark, silly girl. I can barely see you out here, don't worry your pretty little head."
You lost the last bit of your restraint the moment Wanda passed her fingertips over your underwear. They were thin lace, chosen by design so as not to show under your skirt, but they drove Wanda wild. She pushed them aside to slide her fingers along where you were already warm and sensitive, hips stuttering as she stroked over your clit. "O-Oh.."
"Look at you, already wet and needy. Were you like this all night? That why I caught you squeezing your thighs together so often?" You shook your head, trying to deny it, but you weren't even fooling yourself.
Wanda's had you rocking in place for hours by this point; you thought sure you'd been subtle and being called out for your behavior found your head ducking into the crook of Wanda's shoulder to avoid her knowing gaze. "Aww, it's okay! It'll be our little secret, promise..."
Wanda discovered night one what a responsive person you were, delighting in the vice grip you held on the back of her seat while she rolled your nipple in time with her other hand on your sensitive bud. You rocked against her hands as best you could, fighting to keep pace, but hopefully not finish so easily— it'd just been so long and you needed this much more than expected.
The next morning, you'd blame the alcohol. "Wanda please, I- I need.."
"What do you need, sweetheart, wanna cum? Make a mess in my truck after I barely got started with you?" You were nodding so hard your neck hurt, moaning quietly as you felt your body reach its peak; the first of many that night. Ears ringing and thoughts so pleasantly fuzzy, you couldn't recall a time you'd felt more free, in an old pickup truck or otherwise.
"Ooh, aren't you just a masterpiece..." The brunette took her time letting you down, pointer and middle fingers wandering until they just barely pushed into you: less than an inch, but unendingly torturous. "Sounds like I was able to make you feel better, least a little bit."
Tired hips tried every which way to sink onto Wanda's long fingers, the same ones you'd felt on you over your clothes back in the bar and had lists of naughty places you wanted her to put them. But each time, your lover avoids delving anywhere past shallow. "You're being mean, just fuck me."
"Mean? After I let you cum as early as you wanted? You don't know what mean looks like on me. Don't think you want to," A succession of wet slaps echoed in the truck's cabin, the silence of everything around you both amplifying the sound of Wanda lightly hitting your sensitive cunt and your resulting whimpers.
"Told you so. Now, bend over and stay still while I get a proper look like the obedient girl I know you are," Manhandling you over the length of her seats shouldn't have been as easy as it was after the long night out, but Wanda was strong and you never fought her while she pushed your arms to the passenger car door and spread your bent knees apart.
If you were begging her to fuck you out loud, you wouldn't be surprised, wishing so hard that if Wanda still refused to give you exactly what you wanted, she'd at least use her fingers, tongue, anything to fill where you currently felt so empty. "Please- I need more-"
Your thighs shake as she licks over your puffy folds, mumbling the most depraved things about you, your taste, your warmth, leaving you with the most intoxicating combination of feeling both used and adored. "You just keep dripping into my mouth, baby, it's impossible to keep you clean..."
"Can't help it, sorry," But your words aren't matching your actions, not when you kept searching out Wanda's tongue each time she flicked at your clit, pitifully rolling over the rough surface whenever she flattened it out.
You'd long since fogged up the windows, smudging the fog as your overheated cheek met the cold glass; each time you managed to open your eyes you remember exactly where you are, woods rustling in the middle of the night. "W-Wanda! 'm close again, please please...!"
"Mean girls wouldn't let you have two orgasms back to back, no matter how pretty." Wanda likes to believe she actually thought about whether or not to give you what you wanted, but in reality she knew she would leave you wanting the second you turned bratty. Sure it was a risk, not knowing how you'd react, but it was well worth the test to see if you had a chance of handling her past a quick night's distraction. "Straighten up, we're only a few minutes from home."
"That's not fair—"
But Wanda was already pushing you upright again, haphazardly fixing your dress, going so far as to buckle your seatbelt as if it'd keep you from your uncomfortable wiggling. "My car my rules! Like I said, we're not far."
Wanda expected you to pout and huff the whole way, worried in the back of her mind you wouldn't let her lay another hand on you after her denial, but she was pleasantly surprised. Somewhere shortly after she pulled back onto the road, you'd taken her hand; first just to play with her fingers, innocent fidgeting at best, but before she knew it, her digits were engulfed in sinfully wet warmth.
Her fingers in your mouth made the pair of you dizzy, hands holding her wrist as you pumped her digits in and out, tongue swirling over the tips and grinning once Wanda's neutral expression cracked, lips parting in a low groan. "Do mean girls let the good ones suck the strap they've been feeling near them all night or do they only get to play with their hands?"
"Depends on if they show them how bad they want it." Wanda could only look your way for seconds at a time, the visual of your half-lidded gaze trained on her jeans while you so obviously used your imagination to envision some other scenario, muffling your own needy sounds as you forced her fingers to the back of your throat... she'd underestimated the new girl.
Whether it was any lingering alcohol talking or whatever boldness Wanda unlocked that night, something urged you to continue goading her, making a show of spreading your legs and slipping her wet fingers to your sex before closing them once more, slowly grinding her shaking digits to sate yourself for that last tiny stretch of road to the farmhouse. "Bad enough to turn your hand into a toy for as long as you let me."
Wanda made that final turn up her driveway, parking her truck fast as she could with only one hand, "You're lucky I didn't crash just now, you little devil, can't wait to get you inside."
"Lead the way, since we're playing by your rules and all." As soon as she got her hand back, Wanda practically dragged you from her vehicle and for as many hours as you spent awake in her home, you couldn't remember a single detail of any room she brought you through that night.
When you wake up, it's to a dimly lit bedroom, curtains drawn so only a sliver of late morning sun peeked through. Your body ached, but it wasn't from the drinking, taut muscles and lethargic thoughts bringing back bits and pieces of everything you got up to the second Wanda got you past the front door.
The same Wanda whose bed you assumed you were currently sprawled out in. Doubt crept in as you realized you're alone, fretting over if you should've fallen asleep there or not. You were deciding whether it'd be more awkward to sneak out and go back to town on foot or to search out Wanda and ask if she'd mind driving you back to your place when you heard a single knock on the door. "Can I come in?"
Your brow furrowed, "It's your room, of course you can come in." Wanda cracked the door slowly, the back of her loose flannel shirt greeting you first before she turned around, a small tray in her hands. "Sorry for crashing."
"Never said you were unwelcome, I'm sorry for letting you wake up in a strange place by yourself... and for not leaving you at least a shirt, my bad." Your arms hastily bundled the blankets to cover your chest, your nakedness pointed out to you, but Wanda laughed, setting the tray down before heading for her dresser. "Don't worry, darlin, I love the view just as much in the daylight."
"What a reassuring hostess I have," Pulling the t-shirt she tossed you over your head, the delightful scents coming from the tray down the bed now catching your attention. On it was a short stack of pancakes, bacon, orange juice, strawberries... the biggest breakfast you'd seen since you'd come to town. "Did you make that?"
Wanda nodded and slid the food closer to you before sitting on the edge of her mattress, "I don't typically make this much food, but I had to get up early to make some rounds in the barn and I figured I owed you a hearty breakfast after such a nice night."
There was something so endearing to how she explained her actions, rambling on to offset her nerves, No one had even gone to such lengths to make your morning so comfortable after a single hookup, but this set the bar high for anyone else who tried. Not that you'd ever have to worry about another first night, but neither of you knew that yet.
For now Wanda scrambled to find the right way to show genuine interest in the girl she'd brought home and fucked every which way until they passed out and you amusedly ate your special pancakes while watching Wanda try, her fumbling charming you more than she'd ever imagine.
Eventually you put her out of her misery, putting down your utensils to sit up on your knees and stretch over to plant a quick kiss on her soft lips. "I really appreciate it and I'm not even a bit mad with how I woke up, but it's very sweet of you to care, Wands."
"Oh good because I'd really like to see you again sometime, if you're up for it." It would be a rare thing to see Wanda so continuously shy, but she was uncharacteristically smitten and she wanted to get to know you before the rest of the small town came for their changes too.
You hummed as you popped a strawberry into your mouth, licking your fingers in a way that painfully reminded Wanda of the previous night, "How's today?"
"Today?" The farmgirl ran a hand through her long hair, cocking her head to the side much like a lost puppy.
"Yeah, today. If you wouldn't mind me following along." With each minute that ticked past, the less you wanted to leave, much preferring a Sunday spent with Wanda than in your flat full of moving boxes.
Her eyes lit up, smile brighter than the sun, “Can’t complain about a beautiful girl all to myself all day!" Wanda was practically buzzing with everything she wanted to show you, from the chicken coops to the haylofts, but she forced herself to keep her cool.. on the surface at least. "Finish up breakfast and I'll find you some kind of pants."
"But I'm so cozy right here without them." Maneuvering over the last bits of food on your plate meant you more fell into Wanda's lap than sat on it, but she caught you nonetheless, tugging you down for the proper kiss she'd been waiting to share with you since early morning light. "Come back to bed with me?"
After the long sleep your energy was renewed, finally able to take Wanda into all your senses again, the taste of her lips, the subtle earthy smell from the work she'd already done that day, her strong hands settling confidently on your upper thighs... getting dressed was the last thing on either of your minds. "Wouldn't be much of a hostess if I didn't let my guest do as she pleased."
In the end, the pair of you might've set the world record for longest date from Sunday morning to when Wanda finally dropped a reluctant you back into town Wednesday afternoon.
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withahappyrefrain · 8 months
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Summary: After teasing and disobeying Bob, you get your well deserved punishment.
Warning: Choking (yes this is the bicep choking fic), dash of size kink, lots of sex, oral (both receiving), language, mean dom Bob bc I'm a whore
"Darlin'. Behave." His voice is low, gravely in your ear. His fingers gently squeeze the flesh on your hip. To others, it looks nothing out of the ordinary. Just Bob, whispering sweet nothings to his partner.
If only they knew.
You let out a confused hum, tilting your head up to face his. The smile on your face is innocent, unassuming. The same smile that Jake swears was the key to him figuring out that you were married to Bob, stating that y'all looked like 'you just stepped out of a movie musical from the fifties'.
You didn't wear long dresses and skirts because you felt a kinship to a particular decade.
Rather, the extra fabric made it easier to cover yourself while Bob fucked you in his truck. 
Which is exactly what you wanted to be doing right now instead of watching Jake and Bradley argue over a round of pool.
Usually wrapping his arms around your waist and pressing your back into his chest did the trick. Apparently watching two grown men argue was too distracting.
So you began to move your hips, subtly grinding your ass against his crotch. Bob simply squeezed the flesh of your hips, sending a subtle reminder back.
That just wouldn't do.
God, you had been aching for him all day. And yes, it was a bit greedy to still want him after he gave up arriving on time tonight in order to eat you out. Truly, you had hoped the act would be enough until you two returned home. 
But he just looked so good in his white T Shirt. Bob was always handsome, but you loved it when he dressed casually. The soft fabric of his shirt hugged his muscles that he didn't show very often. It seemed that people often forget that Bob had to stay physically fit for his job, that he also had to do two hundred push ups.
You never forgot.
"Just a little bit longer, then we'll go home. Kay?" Bob whispered before pressing a soft kiss to your cheek.
You nodded your head, despite being unsatisfied with his response. Stilling your body, it appeared that you understood his request.
Bob slung an arm around your shoulder, his hand near your breasts, but just out of reach. Your thighs clenched at the sight of his fingers, thinking about how earlier he had used them to make you come so hard your legs shook.
So your hips began their ministrations again. To onlookers, it looked as though you were simply swaying to the music playing from the old jukebox.
Bob knew the truth.
The grip he had on your hip tightened, his lips trailing from your forehead to your ear, "What did I just say?"
"I like this song," you stated, shrugging your shoulders. It was fun, seeing how far you could push him. Bob was pretty good at keeping up the facade, as if his cock wasn't growing erect underneath his jeans.
If things were up to you, his cock would be growing inside you while your back was pressed into the mattress.
Instead, you were still at the Hard Deck, Bob seemingly determined not to break.
"Y'know I'm gonna fuck you when we get home, right?" He whispered, pulling you closer to him, hoping the promise would be enough to satiate you. 
"I know," you said with a sweet smile. No one thought anything odd of your exchange because it looked like a normal conversation you and Bob were having. 
If only they knew. 
Your hand trailed up from his thigh to the back of his neck. His hair was soft, curling thanks to the hat he had on. That old trucker hat that he always wore when he wasn't in uniform. 
Bob let out a strangled grunt upon feeling you tug his hair. The sensation only lasted for a few seconds, your hand moving quickly back to his thigh. 
He was stunned, or so he appeared. 
His arm swiftly moved up your chest. Your eyes bulged upon feeling his bicep against your neck, restricting your airway. 
The action was brief, his bicep gone before anyone could see anything. But the sensation, how easy it was for him to choke you, how he didn't have to move his arm that much because the muscle was so big, remained in your brain, replaying over and over again, your thighs clenching. 
"That made you wet, didn't it?' He asked, chuckling. As if he just witnessed something amusing, rather than choking you in public. 
"Why don't you go check?" 
His stare burned into the back of your head. You didn't need to look, you knew his icy blue eyes were narrower, his nostrils flaring as he thought about what you just implied. 
"You heard me," you whispered, words smug. 
Bob's hand moved quickly. It wasn't a hard slap, but it made your eyes widened. Within seconds after slapping your face, that same hand was now gripping your chin, tilting it upwards so he could press a kiss to your lips. 
No one noticed. 
He had been so fast, that it looked like he was simply cupping your chin to kiss you. 
How sweet. 
No one noticed how his hand was trailing up your thighs, slipping under your skirt, moving towards the space in between your thighs. 
No one noticed how his eyes widened when his hand felt your soaked folds rather than cotton. 
“This whole night?” Bob asked. 
"Wanted to be ready for ya," was the only explanation you gave him. 
It was all you needed. 
Bob didn't let you get that far into the house. As soon as you reached the living room, your knees were on the carpet. The soft material brushed against your face as your legs were pried apart. 
"Ya think you're so big for that fucking stunt, don't you?" His hands were rough, grabbing your hips, pushing them towards his. 
A desperate moan fell from your lips upon feeling his clothed erection against your bare ass. 
"Should have fucked you right then and there. But you'd like that, wouldn't you?" You couldn't help but let out a needy whine upon hearing the sound of him unzipping his jeans.
"But you'd like that too much, wouldn’t ya?" His voice was sinful, low and gruff as he repeated himself, indicating he wanted a response. 
It took some time for Bob to be this comfortable around you. He didn't want to overstep any boundaries, and quite frankly, part of him was worried you wouldn't be into it. 
He was so wrong. 
For as much as you liked being in charge, there were times where you didn't want to make decisions, to think through every action. You wanted to be daring, to be reckless. 
Most of all, you wanted someone to reign you in, to call the shots. 
It worked out well, for Bob only had so much control in his daily life. He didn't call the shots, that was ultimately up to his pilot. He couldn't control what others did up in the air. 
But in this moment, he could control you. Could mold you to how he saw fit. He could make you cum over and over until your legs shook or edge you till tears ran down your face. 
He had options, choices. Something he reminded himself as he felt your bare cunt grinded itself against his denim covered crotch. 
His large hand found your ass, roughly grabbing your soft flesh, practically marveling at your curves. 
“Only want you Robby. Only you,” You pleaded, your voice music to Bob’s ears. 
“God, you’re so soft,” He murmured into your ear, his fingers finding their way to your soaked folds, “Want all of ya.”
You moaned as his fingers thrusted into you, finding that special spot with a precision and quickness that only Bob possessed. 
The sound of his name said in broken moans filled the air, mixing with the lewd sounds of your wetness as his fingers continued his ministrations, his thumb finding your clit. 
With anyone else, you’d be embarrassed by how desperate and loud you were. But god, his fingers were so thick and made you feel so fucking good. Bob knew your body like the back of his hand, every curve, every spot that drove you closer to the edge. 
And you’re so close, you need just a few more thrusts, a few more rough circles drawn on your clit and you would be seeing stars when you closed your eyes. 
But you didn’t deserve that. Not after what you just pulled. 
Which is why Bob responds to your tears and pleads when he pulls out with a harsh slap against your cunt. Pleasure laced pain courses through your body, your own fingers gripping the rug for purchase. 
“Don’t you dare. Turn around and show me how bad you want to come and maybe then I’ll think about it,” Bob ordered. His words caused your walls to clench around nothing. 
You maneuvered your body so that you were now looking up at him. His erection was straining against his clothes, his cock impossible to ignore. 
Quickly, your fingers found the buttons of his jeans, undoing them enough so you could easily pull down both his pants and boxers to his knees. 
Your mouth all but salivated at the sight of his cock, now resting against his abdomen. 
Bob had the prettiest cock you had ever seen. It was perfect, not too thick, curved ever so slightly, which allowed him to hit that spot with every thrust. 
You moaned as your lips touched the plush tip, tongue lapping up the precum that had formed. The vibrations sent shivers down Bob's spine, a deep grunt falling from his lips, his hands gripping your shoulders. 
He used his hands to gently guide your mouth further down his cock. Your cheeks hollowed out, trying to take in as much of him as you could. 
"Just like that sweetheart, f-fuck." Bob could maintain his composure thousands of feet up in the air, but as soon as your pretty mouth was wrapped around his cock, all bets were off. Your mouth was heaven and he loved how eager you were to show him you were able to take so much of him now. 
Drool began seeping down your chin as your head bobbed up and down, taking in as much as you comfortably could. 
His call sign never stood for baby on board. 
"Ya want me to come in your mouth? Or that pretty little pussy of yours?" His words made you want to rub your thighs together, an urge you were desperately fighting, not wanting to risk any more punishments. 
You looked up at Bob and he wished he could take a picture. Wide eyes and your mouth wrapped around his cock. You were beautiful and all his.
And boy, did Bob Floyd fucking love it. 
His fingers gripped your chin, guiding your head away from his cock, "I asked you a question darlin. You gonna give me an answer or do I need to teach you some manners again?" 
"I want you to come in my pussy. Please." 
Bob chuckled, "So polite for a dirty little girl. Turn around." 
And that was your punishment. He'll fuck you, he'll let you come, but you couldn't see him unless he let you. You couldn't kiss Bob unless he wanted to. 
He entered you swiftly, eliciting a near scream from you. 
"Robby!" 
No one had ever made you feel so good, so full before. Bob wasted no time, knowing you were prepared thanks to this afternoon. 
"Fuck, taking my cock s-so good, angel," his voice was shaky, his breath hot on your ear. Even if you were in trouble, he couldn't help but praise you. 
You tilted your head up, hoping he would act on pure instincts and kiss you. 
His lips ghosted over your face, cerulean eyes nearly all but closed as he reveled in the feeling of your warm cunt clenching around his cock. 
"S'big Robby, I-" 
"Shhh," he pressed his lips to your forehead, "You don't have to think. Just let me use that pretty little pussy of yours." 
He snaked an arm around your neck, tightening his grip so his bicep pressed against your throat. Now you had no choice but to look up at him. 
Broken, choked gasps filled your living room, swirling with the sounds of Bob's hips meeting yours. All you could do was take it, his cock repeatedly brushing against the spot that made your toes curl and your back arch in pleasure. 
Before you met Bob, you didn't think that spot even existed. 
"You gonna make a mess all over my cock? C'mon baby, you can do it," Bob flexed his bicep, further restricting your airflow. 
That one movement broke the dam. Your legs shook as white hot pleasure ran through your body. Bob, ever the doting husband, was quick to wrap an arm around your waist, holding you up while your orgasm took over your body. 
"Please don't stop," you're begging and you don't care. Every thrust prolongs your pleasure. All you can focus on, all you care about is your husband and how his cock is sending you to a pleasurable bliss. 
"S'pretty, want another one," Bob's chest was pressed against your back, his hand snaking to just above where you two connected. 
His fingers, calloused from years of work, felt heavenly on your clit. 
The pleasure was now rolling through you in waves. Each thrust, each swipe of your clit sent you reeling. If it weren't for the arm Bob and around your neck and collarbone, you weren't sure you'd be able to hold yourself up. 
"C'mon baby, so fucking pretty. Know you got another one in ya. Fuck, you feel so good. C-can't believe I get ya all to myself, love you s'much," his words were beginning to slur, as if he was drunk off of you. 
It was one of your favorite parts about having sex with Bob. When his words began to slur, when the only things he could intelligibly say were praises for you, the only thing he could focus on was you. 
Between Bob's praises and the circles his thumb was drawing on your clit, your eyes closed as pleasure took over your body again. You were screaming something, could feel your throat strain as you spoke. But what exactly it was, you couldn’t say. 
A large hand cradled the back of your head, the other maneuvering your legs so they were wrapped around a lithe waist.
When you opened your eyes, you found yourself lying on your bed, a pair of blue eyes staring back at you. 
"Hey darlin," Bob's voice was soft as his nose glided over your cheek, "Wanna keep going?" 
You weakly nodded, your hands reaching up to his hair. 
"Use your words darlin," Bob reminded, fucking his head down to press gentle kisses and nips across your neck. 
"Want," you whined, causing Bob to sink his teeth into your collarbone, "Want you to come inside me Robby! Please!" 
A low, guttural groan came from your husband, "Fuck, how did I get so lucky?" 
His mouth trailed down your body, leaving kisses all over. Your fingers flew to his shoulders when you felt his nose brush against your clit. 
"Robby, you said-" 
"I know," his breath was hot on your most intimate part, "But I just gotta taste ya first, okay?" 
Bob couldn't help it and you knew it too. Yes, he got to taste you earlier. He knew it was bad to be greedy, but your cunt was an exception. 
So he didn't feel bad when his tongue found your soaked folds, lapping up your arousal. It drove Bob wild, getting to taste you. He had to fight the urge to grind his hips against the comforter, wanting to come inside you. 
Your fingers were threading themselves in his sun kissed hair, needing something to hold onto as he groaned against your cunt. 
"S'good," Bob moaned, sending vibrations all along your body. Wanting to keep you ready for him, he thrusted a finger inside you. 
"Robby!" 
Bob simply smirked, knowing your walls could feel the cool, smooth metal of his wedding band. He continues making languid thrusts against that spongy spot, the one that he knows drives you wild, makes your legs shake. 
Besides, you were still being punished. You wanted to come so badly tonight, so Bob was going to make you come.
Over and over again. 
Your back arched as his tongue continued to lap at your clit, sensitivity surging through you. 
While your release came in a smaller wave this round, it was still intense. Your fingers gripped the soft strands of Bob's hair, hips jerking upwards in a shameless attempt to get more of Bob's mouth. 
"What's wrong? Thought ya wanted my cock darlin," Bob smirked when he pulled away. 
It was impressive how after five years he could still take you by surprise. You open your eyes, his words making you want to sit up. 
Instead, your husband's lips crashed onto yours, his large hands pushing you back down to the mattress. 
"Asked ya a question darlin. Gonna give me an answer?" 
Two could play the game. 
Your fingers gripped his hair, nails brushing against his scalp as you tugged on the locks, pulling his head back. 
"You gonna fuck me?" 
You could only place a few love bites on his neck before you were back on your knees, face against the pillow. 
"When did you get so bold?" The rural drawl laced his deep voice, his breath hot on your neck. 
"Since you stopped fucking me." That was the final straw. Bob quickly lined his cock to your entrance and thrusted in without a warning, sending you practically reeling. 
"Fuck Bob!" 
"That's what I'm trying t'do," he snarled, his hips quickly meeting yours. 
Any smartass comment died in your throat when Bob's bicep pressed against your neck. God, it was easy to forget how big and strong he was. He tried to hide it, tried to make himself small, make himself blend in by hunching over, by not taking up as much space. 
Which was why you loved it when he displayed his strength. He didn't have to flex much, if at all, to have the muscle against your throat, restricting your airway. 
"Can tell how much ya love that from the way you're clenching me so tight." 
You could only let out a strangled hum of agreement, too busy focused on how fucking full you felt every time he bottomed out. 
Bob knew you were getting close. He could tell by the way your breath quickened, your walls clenching around his cock, not wanting it to leave. 
Bob was also very close. Had been for quite a while. But he was raised to be a gentleman and you deserved to come several times before he did. 
His free hand trailed down to where you two connected. Just a little more attention to your clit and Bob would have you right where he desperately needed you. 
All you could do was take his cock, take in the scent of eucalyptus that surrounded him, mixed with the sweat that came from his hard work. 
"M'so close," you weakly groaned, fingers finding purchase in your comforter. 
"I know, just a little more. You can wait for me, I know ya can. Fuck I'm so lucky, married to ya. Ya gonna take it all too, aren't ya? Fuck, I love ya so fucking much." 
He released the grip he had on your throat, turning your head so he could capture your lips once more. 
That was what sent you reeling. That's what made you see galaxies when you closed your eyes. The only thing you could focus on was how good he felt, fucking you, coming inside of you, filling you up with everything he had. 
For what seemed like ages, you two were frozen in place, trying to catch your breath. 
"Darlin, I'm gonna pull out now, 'kay?" Bob finally said, gently pressing a handkerchief to where you two were connected. 
"Can we shower after this?" You mumbled. 
Bob pressed a kiss to your shoulder, "Course we can." 
"With the shower steamer?" 
Bob chuckled, "The rosemary one, right?" 
"Love ya Robby." 
"I love you too darlin'."
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harleehazbinfics · 4 months
Text
Have a nap and a snack, all is good!
devout series
Word Count: A/N: have y'all seen the reels about the passage from the bible about if you're having a really bad day, God said just take a snack and a nap and all is well. this is that :)
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It was Angel's day off and he promised you he'd cook with you today. That is to say that he'll be testing your cooking on how authentically Italian it was.
With hop in your step, you bounded to his room giving it a light rhythmic rap. He answers after a while letting yourself in, to find him face down the bed, lil Nuggets worriedly massaging his poor back with his hooves.
"Are you ok?" you couldn't help but ask.
"Yeah, no, I'm fine. Just had another rough day with Val. Come on, I promised you I'd taste your cooking, didn't I?" Angi tried to smile sitting up from his bed.
Angel really got attached to you at one point after you celebrated his birthday with things and food that he might have shared in passing that you remembered and prepared for him that touched him very much, after such a long time being in hell that it just goes over your head that times passed. He enjoys your company; your bright and fluttering energy makes him forget how disgusted he was with himself. Being around you makes it feel lighter.
"Why don't you rest for a while instead I'll just ask-"
"No no, it's fine! I'm fine. And uh, I was kinda excited for today," he says bashfully.
You smile at him and nod, holding one of his hands while you walked towards the kitchen. No one really uses the kitchen aside from you and the Morningstar family. So, you could easily spot your utensils because they clean up after themselves, surprisingly for Lucifer.
By the time you finished cooking Angel folded over the counter snoring. You smile and wipe your hands dry on your apron before combing through his hair.
It was probably the smell of food that woke him up dazed, paired with your gentle movements it made him feel safe that he subconsciously made a purring sound.
"You hungry?" you ask pushing his hair out of his forehead which he nodded to happily half awake.
You placed two servings of Ragu pasta and Caprese salad in front of you both to enjoy, his eyes light up in recognition to the dishes. He eats them heartily giving you 4 thumbs ups making you giggle.
After eating the meal, he insisted on cleaning the dishes while you sat at the counter watching him happily, satisfied that you did well on cooking and making Angi's day better.
"Hey, (y/n)," he starts, "Thanks for today. I really needed that."
You couldn't help but grin ear to ear when you heard that and clapped your hands. Responding with a warm welcome. While the both of you were engrossed in the conversation, you failed to notice the black cat peering by the door way with a smile on his face pass by.
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