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#but also for real if you're the type that would play something pitched as a 'medieval lesbian convent dating sim'. uh. watch this space.
ailinu · 8 months
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dating sim writing (potentially more interactive writing? but who's to say; this is just what i'm working on right now) is so fascinatingly mechanical.
like. there are questions that i've thought about in regards to more narrative writing and pacing---how long does it take to establish a relationship (of any kind)? what keeps it from feeling rushed?---that become entirely different questions when one of the characters that you're dealing with is at least partially determined by the reader. and here developing and exploring the relationship is the point; there's less available to reveal through external plot, and more space for conversation, but at the same time, there's a balancing act where you're trying to create the feeling that things are developing organically (not necessarily on rails!) whilst within the mechanical constraints of coding something up (there are some rails!).
But like: how many choices should a reader have in a conversation to make it feel like they have input? How many of those should mechanically matter? What's the line between feeling like you have narrative freedom and feeling like you're being asked to make a lot of choices that don't particularly matter? How do you create something that is on rails (a conversation tree about a particular topic should touch on X number of things) without it feeling on rails?
And then there's questions of overarching structure, and how things tie together; whether every conversation should advance character or relationship progression and if they don't, how one determines when things progress; whether routes are self-contained, and if they're not, how one makes interactions across routes feel natural and interesting, and so on, and so forth, and it's so interesting to think about.
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pinkyqil · 9 days
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player: Esmee Brugts
Esmee comforts reader after the game because reader got into a confrontation with an opponent on the pitch during el clasico
Conflict // esme brugts
You were never the type to starts arguing with the ref or player's.Yes you've had your moments here and there which would be rare.
but today of all day anthea decided that you would be her target.
you knew it was apart of the job but at some point she kept pushing and fouling you around like some ragdoll and you've had enough and weren't going to be pushed around any longer than enough.
It was like your teammates could read your mind around half time alexia lucy and Irene came up to you.
after esme had told them something you couldn't hear sometimes you loved your girlfriend but when she does stuff you don't know about it really gets to you.
"Whatever plan is going on in your little head don't do it just ignore athena it not worth running el classico for yourself". alexia told you which the other's agreed.
"Fine".was all you could get out.
"Don't let her get to you kid you got a brick heart so let's keeping playing like that". Lucy added.
"Thanks guys I'll try". You told them.
After the little chit chat the game had resume and it seemed liked the real madrid coach had told athena something. cause right now all she's been doing was bitching around and talking smack whenever she got close to you.
You ignored her for half the time and tried focusing on the game that would be before. Right now you had the ball as ona passed it to you with a clean pass.
which you got has you were about to kick it in the goal you spotted athena coming your way you quickly dribbled the ball around her. and as you we're kicking it into the goal it got to athena who also seemed to be flying in with the ball and obviously into net along with your goal.
You didn't know to celebrate or just stand there trying to think about how on earth you mange to pull that.
You wanted to get her ass but definitely not like that.before you knew it athena was marching past you and started yelling at you.
you both got into a very heated argument which lead to both teams having to pull there player.
The ref was thankful on your side after giving seeing the bull shit athena has been pulling.she got subbed off and you we're finally being able to enjoy the final moments of el classico.
Once the team had finished celebrating on the pitch everyone made there way to the dressing room.
"Ay amiga the trick you pulled on athena was badass". patri told you
"I wasn't even planning on doing that".
"as if we all know how bad you wanted to get a go at her".
"Yeah but not like that".
"Patri just drop it she's clearly not in the mood". esme called putting an end to patri teasing she wasn't the type to always speak out as she had a very shy persona.
"lo siento, amiga". She apologized.
"No worries you told her". es you ready to go,you called out to her.
"Yeah let's go".she said grabbing you're hand.
"Bye guys".you both told your teammates before leaving.
"Thanks for your help out there and in the changing room". You told her as you both arrived at your destination.
"No worries there isn't anything I would do for my favorite girl and what patri was right earlier theway you knocked her into the net was badass babe". She told with a bright smile on her face.
"If you say so now let's forget about it and enjoy our dinner at the restaurant".
The rest of the night was filled with a lot of love from esme she made sure to give you extra massages and kisses which made you feel better.
A/n: hope the fic reached your standards,I'm always opened to you guys sending in a player prompt and location or any type of request in general and as always feedbacks and comments are appreciated enjoy reading and hope you have a spectacular day ! 🫶🏾
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belphegorbillickin · 9 months
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Could I request b,e,o,v,x for Floyd and Jade
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Honestly, I feel like this is one of the only situations where the yandere version of the characters would actually be nicer and potentially even healthier, at least for Jade.
So consider yourself warned.
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Bargain, would they just accept a break-up? Do they mope around or try to fix things? How would they attempt to get you back?
Honestly, I could easily see Floyd going either way. He's definitely not the type to start crying and clinging onto someone as they leave, but he's also definitely not the kind of guy that just lets someone leave either. So if Floyd's getting kind of bored or if he can tell you're just trying to play mind games with him? He'll let you go with zero fanfare. Or, if he's actually annoyed, he'll start rubbing it in and use every one of your closely guarded insecurities against you to ensure your faux tears turn real. Honestly, it's your fault shrimpy, for assuming he wouldn't notice just 'cause he's a little moody. Floyd is eerily perceptive, he just rarely utilizes it for anyone else's gain. Well, besides maybe Jade and occasionally Azul, if he compensates him enough.
But if he doesn't want you to go? You don't. Period, end of story, capiche? Try to leave and suddenly everyone you've ever cared about is either under contract, got the other twin's fist wrapped around their throat, literally and figuratively, and the trio already has several lists worth of blackmail ready to send to everyone's employers and landlords. Whether it's actual evidence, falsified, or both is up to you and your loved ones. So do be sure to make a wise decision, won't you?
Trying to get the police involved means getting the family involved, and while they don't have as much influence above sea level, it's still more than enough. You're in this for life, or y'know, until they get bored of you. Which isn't all that unlikely, although chances are if neither has gotten sick of you a few years in you're probably stuck for life. But who cares about the fine print when you're living in the moment? You're having fun, aren't you? Aren't you?
Jade is a bit trickier, as his behavior can change quite a bit depending on your own. Even in a relationship, you can never be quite sure how honest he's being. Although honestly, I can't see him being the kind of person to truly chase after someone, and he's certainly not the kind to beg or plead with any kind of sincerity. Well, romantically that is, he very much loves to chase people in the literal sense. Especially when they let out those delightfully high-pitched shrieks humans are just so full of. Regardless, chances are if you want to break up it's most likely because he's already started to lose interest, otherwise he would've already prevented that. Or tried his best to, anyway. But, in the rare case that you saw something you shouldn't have or you start to want to stray for whatever inane reason, I could see Jade pulling his usual schemes to get you back.
Though, there is an extremely high chance he's only winning you back just to gouge your heart out and ruin all of your future relationships instead. You do remember what he said back in Scarabia, right? "If I were betrayed by someone the way you were, I'd lash out with a torrent of unmitigated abuse to break them mentally, then bind them and drag them beneath the waves."
In the even smaller chance that he actually wants you back… Yeah, you're still getting much of the same. If anything he's even more likely to isolate you and carefully lash out at any support systems you may have. Not because he's under any real delusion that they caused this and you're just an innocent little guppy, but because Jade believes in an eye for eye and you've left him awfully blind. Or rather, Jade believes in an eye for an entire shattered skull, at the very least. Jade is aware that he's a rather complicated man. He adores chaos and unpredictability, but delights in squashing the weak and innocent under his boots, one inch at a time, controlling every aspect of their life. But don't you feel flattered to catch his ever wandering eye? You should you know, he can count the number of people who've entertained him this long on one single, spindly hand. Do take care to keep that up now, won't you?
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Outrageous, how do they react when you get yourself into trouble? Do they bail you out or are you on your own? Do they expect you to get them out of trouble?
Honestly, both Floyd and Jade probably find it funny, or at least entertaining. So long as you're not in mortal danger of course. They'll give you the chance to get yourself out of whatever trouble you've gotten yourself into, just for the sheer joy of watching you struggle, but neither of them would pass up on the chance of getting you indebted to them. It'd be incredibly hard to get to the chance to actually save Jade, and honestly I think he'd find it very disconcerting at absolute best anyway, especially since that would typically mean neither Floyd nor Azul had been able to get there first. Jade wouldn't dare act ungrateful though. He'll immediately start paying you back, but he's putting at least twice as much effort into finding some way to gain control over you in turn.
Floyd would also be slightly uneasy at first, but mainly head over heels for his beloved shrimpy! Your spine will be shattered by his sheer adoration and excitement instead of the usual reasons. He'll still pay you back, but he's nowhere near as concerned about it as Jade is. Who still tries to get you under his control, just for his brother's sake instead of his own this time.
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Emergency, what would they do if you needed them? Do they drop everything? Do they panic? What do they do if they need you?
Floyd may not seem like it at first, but he's very protective, territorial even, when it comes to his darling shrimpy. A dog bites you, tearing out a piece of your flesh? Well, you'd better find something to bite down on yourself, because Floyd is going to be gouging it out with his own needle-like teeth soon after. Don't whine too much, alright? Azul can fix that right up. But not before Floyd bites you first, for... reasons. Eelmer reasons. You may uh, also want to keep any Mr John Wicks away from the area depending on the circumstances and how bad your injuries are. …Okay, yeah. Realistically whatever animal that attacked you is getting beaten to death in a way that'd make his usual go-to of being gutting something alive with his claws or snapping a spine in two seem merciful. The owner is likely getting their ass handed to them as well, especially if they did nothing to intervene or even blamed you, regardless of how high up they think they are.
People living under the sea, especially in the deep, dark trenches where eelmer usually live, don't have the same luxuries as those living above it. If something, whether that be another predator or simply another unknown mer, gets too comfortable around their pod, then they must be destroyed for the good of the group. Open, bleeding wounds are a one-way ticket to a feeding frenzy, and although mer may not be anywhere near as protective of their young as most of the other sapient races, they would still rather kill any predators their children have no hope of surviving. Besides, what kind of mate would he be if he allowed you to bleed out? From something he didn't even do himself at that? Humans are awfully pathetic creatures, aren't they? Good thing you have him to protect you then, like any other good eel protected their beloved shrimp. (Even if it is very a bit reminiscent of a protection racket.)
Jade, for all his efforts to appear oh so controlled, is actually not all that dissimilar once his instincts kick in. You'd never know it just listening to his voice, but get him riled up enough and it'll be shockingly easy to mistake him for Floyd with the way he's wailing on your assaulter, one broken bone at a time. Though you do have to wonder if Floyd was ever this cruel as he somehow manages to avoid knocking them out, prolonging their suffering even further. But don't worry. Once he's done with that he'll ruin them financially, if they're even still alive that is, as well as everyone else they've ever loved as well. 
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Vacation, Do they have vacation plans? Where are they taking you? For how long?
Floyd would love to take you back home! It's where he can laugh at all of your pathetic attempts to keep up with him as you beg to not be left behind. It sure does feel nice to be wanted, doesn't it? Where he could scare you by hiding in the kelp forests and dragging you into them, show you all of his favorite spots, the cute wildlife he imagined you cooing at, and show off his fighting abilities in a form even stronger than the one you're used to.  As much as Floyd loves to seek out new experiences, he does seem to be the most homesick and comfortable in his natural form out of the three of them. Besides, having you come along with him keeps things fresh and exciting! And mama's been dying to meet you! Don't be shy, she doesn't bite. Without good reason to, at least. Unlike her (two) son(s.) As for how long? Probably not too long, but as is everything with Floyd, it's rarely consistent. Even when he's already agreed to a specific date.
Jade, on the other hand, would love to bring you to the mountains with him. He's surprisingly patient with you, even if you keep stumbling and asking for breaks, so long as you're willing to let him ramble on about the wonders of nature and show at least a little excitement for him. He's maybe a little too excited, especially when you (un)knowingly bite into the love(mysterious mushroom)-packed lunch that he made just for you! But why wouldn't he be? Are you really so cruel as to accuse your poor "little" heartbroken boyfriend of having some ulterior motives? He would love to stay longer, (and see how long you could last out in the wilderness,) but alas, duty calls. Jade can rarely stay for longer than a weekend, but he'd love to leave Friday night and come back Monday morning if he could.
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X-ray, what are some of their thoughts when with you that they don’t say aloud?
It'd be easier to list the things that Jade did say aloud, in front of or about you. Honestly, I don't think Jade would be all that into romance on his own at first. He'd probably think of your relationship as more of an experiment at first, in the psych study kind of way, until he finally started getting attached. Not that he would've just done it with anyone though, that would be a colossal waste of his time and effort.  No, you were still special to him in your own way even before that. Enough for Floyd to notice his interest in you and consider interfering even. For his brother's sake of course, what kind of an eel do you take him for?
Floyd on the other hand hardly ever keeps anything to himself, regardless of how that might make you feel. He absolutely loves the cute little faces and complaints you make when he says something a bit too crass. If he thinks you should be wearing something more flattering or acting a bit smarter? He'll tell you. If he thinks you look really good in public? He'll definitely tell you with zero care of who's watching. Or especially so, if it means offending someone like Riddle. Floyd does whatever his black little heart desires at the time, regardless of (most of) the consequences. The only real exceptions are things that Jade doesn't want you to know, (Azul's usually fair game though, especially if it gets him all huffy,) and classified details about the family business. That's not to say he can't be incredibly sneaky or plan things out however. Remember Bean Day? As Floyd himself said, Morays are cowards at heart. He won't go in for the kill until everything's set up just right, even if the waiting is killing him, and he's certainly not averse to bringing Jade or Azul into his plans. You may not even notice he's planned anything at all however, as Floyd's behavior is so erratic that all of his carefully laid plans and suddenly bossy behavior as he pulls you along don't stand out at all.  Your only hope of noticing when he's going to pull you into something particularly dangerous or permanent is the excited gleam in his eyes, and how much of his undivided attention he's been giving you for hours on end. So yeah... Good luck with that.
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Honestly, I've just never really abided by the popular fanon characterizations.
I wasn't active in the fandom at all until book three had been released on the English app, and still rarely sought out anything until after book 4, so seeing them being characterized the way they are on tumblr left me feeling like I had read something completely different.
At least one member of the octatrio is always in my top 3 specifically because they were some of the only "truly evil, unrepentant villains" in TWST.
Especially because I only really got into TWST when I was feeling frustrated about OBM! losing almost all of it's edge and seeing nothing but fluff & lighthearted humor 24/7.
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brisquad-unit-4402 · 1 year
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IM LOSING IT OVER YOUR RECENT IKE FIC. LIKE OH MY GOD. its so sweet and heartwrenching i felt just as nervous and anxious as reader the entire time, and when ike reciprocated my heart MELTED AHHH his freckles!!! how kind and beautiful he is, and his confusion turning into acceptance and his SQUEALSSS AAAA. i cant take it this is my fav ike and probably luxiem fic of all time. all of your hard work paid off so well, it was so well structured and emotional and everyone felt so real!! like they arent characters, theyre actual people!!
ahh, now i wish i knew ike's perspective during those stream moments and his reaction to pen and paper ship content HAHA. i imagine he swiftly bookmarks it on his private account but he keeps blushing and his hands shake whenever he sees any fanart WAAAH. maybe one time he sees pen and paper kissing and he cant properly look at the notifications from reader's chat without FLUSHING RED i love them so bad
i love whenever i'm reading a fanfic and it's so sweetly emotional that you feel your own emotions kicking in. so whenever i hear my work has that effect on someone else it's one of the nicest feelings in the world and WHAT DO YOU MEAN FAVORITE IKE AND/OR LUXIEM FIC EVER. that's super high praise thank youuuuu sobsobsob
i mean this is the kindest most /posi way possible but "they aren't charcters, they're actual people" is the scariest compliment i've ever heard. like on one hand i'm genuinely happy! i worked really hard on keeping multifaceted personalities in mind even for the minor characters! but also Oh No. I'm Writing Vtubers. We Need To Play This So Carefully And So Conscious Of The Creator/Audience Boundary Or My Ass Is GONE
real talk one of my most favorite ike things is when he squeals at something cute or because he's embarrassed ahhhh. and his speaking voice gets so high pitched and soft when he's flustered too like?? it's probably my favorite charm point of his
the ogs remember the poll i ran like a month ago about if ike should have freckles or not. shoutout to the landslide victory, if i remember correctly 97% of voters wanted ike with freckles! so glad that worked out, it works so well with the star theme and the difference between an online friendship meeting irl, and how reader loves them because it's a reminder that they have so much to learn about ike and are ready/willing, and also, freckles are just plain adorable. ike is just plain adorable. put them together and if i were richer and thirstier i'd be commissioning an artist
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
real talk tho i feel like ike goes from 1 to 100 whenever he catches himself simping over reader before the off-collab. either he's really good at acting composed, being normal, just interacting with his best friend like best friends do... or he's a stuttering, blushy mess that wavers like jell-o.
ike's the type of guy to sleepily check twitter before going to bed and whenever he sees pen and paper on his fyp it's like he snaps awake. maybe even squeaks or goes "a!" if it's especially.... you know. sometimes he can't even comprehend that people want him and reader to. well. his mouth goes dry.
and then he feels so dirty and embarrassed just because it's there, but... he's still looking at it. is it bad he's still looking at it? it definitely is but it's captivating, in a way. somehow. the artists are so talented, and somehow they nail your body language to a t, and the way your hair swoops above your eyes, and draw you with the cutest little expressions, and—
ah, who is he kidding.
in moments of weakness it triggers something in him to bury his face a little deeper in his blankets, pretend the screen's light would cool the heat pooling over his cheeks, and search the hashtag himself.
not even three pieces of fanart later, he has to throw his phone face-down on the mattress, cover his blush with a pillow, and now he's definitely squealing. it's healing and it makes him ill. it's... pretty. you're pretty. and he's pretty dumb for letting a silly crush distort itself like this.
the worst part is that some of these line up a little too well with daydreams he wanted to lock away until the end of time. he likes when he takes the lead. the stunned, puppyish expression so rare it only shows up on your face during the biggest plot twists during a stream, but coated in a darkened blush as he pecks them on the cheek, elegant and composed. calm.
ohhhh, this can't be good for his heart. especially when ike himself is so red-faced just thinking of it. calm, his foot.
still with the pillow over his flush, ike feels around for his phone and sets it on his nightstand. he chides himself. that's enough internet for the day, eveland! now quit acting like a shoujo high schooler in love and go to bed already, it's not going to happen!
he sets his face into a determined frown as he lifts the pillow and sets it aside. with any luck, he'd go the rest of the night without thinking of reader and his feelings for them.
the frown eases as he nestles into his blankets and tucks himself in. soft sheets and warm comfort greet him as he shuts his eyes, and he enters the fluffy haze of sleep as he slips into dreamland...
...is what he'd like to say, but not even ten seconds later his eyes snap open and jerks upright in bed. wait, i'm acting like i'm in love?!
he sits with the thought seeping through his brain like a corrosive acid, filing through every little moment he daydreamed about you, and when those don't paint him a picture he likes, he tries to recall the moments he shared with you instead. those are even fonder, and even worse.
he slaps his hands over his face and sighs, and when it sounds lovesick he sighs even more.
✧. ┊ masterpost ✧. ┊ kofi
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theskoomacat · 2 months
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i want to plug Pacific Drive real quick. i had a free day yesterday so i spent it in its entirety glued to the screen. i'm not proud. check out this game!!!!!!
it's kind of like a mix between STALKER and Firewatch (by vibe. in my head). (the Impact of Roadside Picnic on our society!) idk the official genre tags on the game but at its base it is a survival game with looting and crafting.
but. you're doing all that to spoil your beautiful princess (your maybe sentient cat that maybe will kill you eventually). you spend 80% of the time in your car, it's your defense against the elements and the Zone. the gameplay loop is fairly simple - you drive, you listen to scientists bicker over the radio, you loot, you lose half your car, you HAUL ASS, you get home.
the game offers a HUGE variety of stuff to explore, from anomalies to weather conditions to biomes to the weird flora/fauna to lore. there's SO much lore, idk who decided to write a blurb for every type of paint. huge game for people who love to collect stuff. and collecting stuff is sometimes a puzzle on its own because you need different tools (which are often interchangeable, thankfully, with varying efficiency).
and driving is very fun. i have a special condition called "Played Skyrim in formative years", so the mountains are a challenge to me, not a barrier. i enjoy the fact that driving being the focal point reshapes the world significantly (from the gamedev pov), because it is built to accommodate driving instead of just running around. the roads are the main focus of all the anomalies due to that, so frankly running around would be easier than dodging the roadblocks, but also you would fucking die. it's actually funny that i regularly find the roads by the concentration of anomalies instead of like. the road itself.
the game is pretty. the GIANT walls/lab megastructures blow my mind, they're so fucking huge. BUT. one problem i have is that there are too many nights. i have already toggled "Shorter nights" on, and still it feels like 60% of rounds take place at night (maybe i'm doing something wrong idk). yes, it is a challenge, but also i wish i could see the game?
the world itself is pretty fun. i have already mentioned STALKER, which is a very fair comparison since you're in a Zone filled with Anomalies. except this time the Zone is not a strictly "natural" occurence, which mixes this genre with the "fucked up mid-20th cent american science->military complex" genre. it is really interesting to see many different opinions on what the Zone is doing in the lore. and you can draw your own conclusions from interacting with it. it is as likely to harm you as help you, and most of the time it just Fucks with you (LIM shield ilu).
what hasn't i mentioned yet? the characters are fun, an old jaded scientist lady who's entombed herself within her creation, her ex-colleague and his bf/husband who stayed in the Zone to hunt cryptids, all lovely. the music is mostly good, but unfortunately there aren't too many tracks, so some get old really quick (i WISH i got tired of DOCTOR JUICE). but do check the radio from time to time, there are cool transmissions you can catch there.
idr if there was a difficulty selector anywhere, but you can make the game easier at will in the settings - keep inventory, restore the car when back home, etc. i wish i had known about these settings when i "died" at the EXACT moment i moved to another zone, because i both lost half my inventory AND was forced to continue my run due to that lmao. the game is Not easy tbh. the first time i was in the city with a hole in the center i couldn't climb out of there because it was pitch dark and my car was so so broken, it actually made me super frustrated. but when you learn all that stuff and actually plan for it and outfit your car with it mind, it all becomes manageable and enjoyable. it is decidedly not a horror game, but it Is unsettling at times. dense fog+bigfoot weather conditions made me SO paranoid, although i didn't actually see anything lol
so yeah, i totally recommend the game if you enjoy survival games. here are also some tips for people trying the game out for the first time, aka what I wish I had known:
In the beginning doing more runs (=bringing in more anchors) will be more benefitial than turning over every rock in every zone because a lot of good stuff is locked behind upgrades. One exception - quest zones with Perpetual Stability, you can explore and loot there for an hour if you want
Shorten the nights. It's not fun to stumble around blindly, especially not in the beginning while you're still learning
Hold T to teleport your car out of sticky situations and use Y to sort inventories. idk why they don't tell you that
PLAN. Look at the resources in each location has before launching and bring extra instruments/raw materials in accordance
Invest into better batteries and renewable energy, it gets more and more important as you progress. You don't really need to upgrade the gas tank until you've upgraded the engine, unless you spend 50% of the time trying to crawl up a mountain with summer tires (off-road tires are the shit)
Skip the crowbar, the impact hammer and scrapper can do everything it does
Dying is not super scary aside from losing progress, you just lose your inventory and maybe some attachments, but you will get an opportunity to find the wreckage of your car on a different run (orange tombstone? icon) and to loot it
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roguemaki · 3 months
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Hey! I hope your week is going great :)
Like everyone else, i wanted to send you a heartfelt thank you for your immense efforts and time that you take out of your day to translate and type set these interviews and videos.
It always brightens my day when i get a notification from you and i know I’m in for a treat so it’s really truly appreciated from our end 🙏🏼
I was also wondering that when the asticassia school assembly BD comes out, if you could consider uploading it somewhere so that people who can’t purchase it would be able to watch it as well? I was really looking forward to seeing the VAs performance on stage and also some of the comedic moments like Suletta rapping but unfortunately, money is a bit tight for me right now. 😞
If you could consider it that would be awesome but if you rather not do jt, that’s totally fine as well :)
I also wanted to ask for your advice regarding learning japanese. I took some classes in college but haven’t kept up with it. Do you know any resources that you felt were really helpful to you when you were learning the language? I really want to dedicate myself to it this time! I’d really appreciate any tips, thank you! :)
Hey hey~ I actually got some fantastic news at work, so my week's off to a great start. :3
And you're very welcome! Thank you for enjoying and supporting my TLs.
I pre-ordered the School Assembly BD and am planning to subtitle it in parts, similarly to how I'm doing the Ep 24 Character Commentary… but for an upload of the full thing, I have to be more circumspect: I'll post when the rip is available and give contact info so interested folks can reach out directly. Just trying to avoid getting Eye of Sauron'd by Bandai-Namco, lol.
Regarding Japanese study: we're in similar boats! I also took classes in college and got back into serious self-study after not practicing for a while.
Here are some self-study resources I find useful:
For daily Japanese practice…
Renshuu for vocabulary and grammar. WaniKani for learning kanji. Ringotan for kana and kanji writing practice.
Renshuu is a site (also available in convenient app form) for building up vocabulary and grammar with quizzes, games, and community activities. It's by-and-large free - premium provides some enhancements (like more listening/pitch tools), but isn't necessary for most of the content. WaniKani is a fantastic resource for learning kanji. They use some truly memorable mnemonics to teach radicals/vocabulary and schedule lessons/reviews in a way that promotes real retention. Give Levels 1-3 a try since they're free, and if you like the teaching method, a lifetime premium sub is reasonably affordable when it goes on sale (like on Black Friday). I use Ringotan, a free phone app, to supplement WaniKani (which is focused on reading/recognition) with writing practice.
Other resources/tools...
Install Yomitan, an in-line dictionary extension, on your browser.
Dokusho Bookclub is a site for finding reading materials targeting specific JLPT levels.
Out of the many resources available on YouTube, I want to highlight Kaname Naito's channel - he teaches in depth vocabulary and grammar used in actual conversational Japanese.
I have a routine of always doing my "dailies" and just try to read/watch/play as much Japanese media as possible... Thankfully there's so much good stuff available online nowadays. :>
Hope you find something useful for you in this list. Good luck with your studies!
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moon-catto · 2 years
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Shifting into JJK Universe!
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I had this crazy dream and decided to write it down but with a little twist sksksk 😃
Warning: none, fluff? Manga spoiler inside!
Masterlist
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I got this crazy dream when I took a nap in the afternoon. I was doing my college assignments that I ignored for weeks. Tomorrow is the deadline so I literally speedrun my essay to prevent me from failing that class.
It was like 5 pm when I finally sent my essay via email to my professor, there's nothing special that time. But somehow the air feels a bit warmer and I can smell the subtle scent of wet grass because my windows are open. I can see the red sky outside where the sun is barely setting.
And something about it moved me. I pulled my chair closer to my window and sat there for a moment. I rested my chin on the windowsill as I enjoyed the light breeze of passing wind hit me gently.
Being a seventh semester student is tiring, I keep running here and there trying to keep everything together when it's clearly falling apart. I was too busy chasing after my diploma to see the world around me.
I forgot that the world can be so… beautiful.
A smile was curved on my face. It may look like a tired smile, but it feels blissful nonetheless. This simple moment is very precious, where I can breathe easily without worrying about my assignments and grades. I can just simply… breathe.
I wasn't tired, no. I have an even more heavy assignment before. This much doesn't tire me or maybe it's because I didn't realize just how tired I am? Perhaps that's why my eyelids feel so heavy right now.
I got a night class later… a light nap won't be a problem, right?
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I'm not the type of person who dreams often. If I do, it would be an absurd type of dream, you know? Like the world is falling into a zombie outbreak and I'm the only human left. It usually ended with me running for my dear life with these left4dead zombies chasing for my ass.
Ugh, it was horrible. I don't wanna remember that dream again. Anyway the funny thing is, whenever I have these dreams I would always be able to access a side menu. Like an in-game menu where you can pause the world, resume the dream, skip the dream, or go back to the main menu a.k.a the real world. Of course, I was quick to choose to skip that dream— just to be chased by abnormal titans in another dream.
This time too, I was playing hide and seek with Huggy Wuggy from the Poppy Playtime game in Willy Wonka's Chocolate Factory (I know. It was a very wild dream). He found out where I hid, so I tried to run away but my body feels so heavy like time got slowed down but that thing— that blue furry monster walked so quickly towards me and was about to eat me.
I screamed but my voice also pitched down because I'm still stuck in the slow down mode. Thanks to my super quick reflexes, I was able to press the side menu and skip the dream/sarcastic.
So that's why now I'm stuck in this white space. I'm finally able to breathe freely and my movement becomes normal.
I was about to fall because of the sudden change in space, but luckily I was held by someone.
"Geez, that scared the hell out of me." The person who held me said, His voice is surprisingly familiar. "You appeared here out of nowhere and screamed like you're getting possessed." He had the audacity to laugh at my misery. I would be throwing hands and legs at him if only I wasn't so shocked at the current moment.
I let out a coughing fit because of the building tension earlier. My chest feels so tight, it's painful. The pain is very vivid, just like when someone punched you right on your chest. "Holy shit. Should have not watched that youtuber gameplay last night." I muttered between coughs.
"Hey, you're okay? You look a bit pale there." He pushed my chin with his thumb to see my face. I squinted my eyes shut, in fear that he had a disfigured face or something. I don't really think I can handle another jumpscare right now.
Sensing my fear, his voice got softer.
"It's okay. You're okay. Nothing is going to happen to you."
I clearly remember the owner of this voice. Is it really him? Can I open my eyes? What if it's not him? I can count the occasions where I fall for this kind of sweet trap in other dreams, it doesn't end well to say the least.
"I promise."
Oh, wow. He sounds very reliable. Why do I feel like crying?
"Aw, look at you." He ruffled my hair. "You're crying. You were that scared?" I can hear him chuckle lightly. "What kind of monster did you see to make you this scared, huh…" Maybe he took pity on my pathetic self, that's why he's pulling me closer to him.
A bump. Is this… his chest? For your information, yes it was hard. Also, boii, you're going to kill me right here.
"Now you're laughing. Aren't you a weird girl." He hummed, he sounded amused even. Figures, he must've never seen such a weirdo in his life.
But No, you don't understand mister. This is the most delightful dream I ever had in my life. Like for real? I don't wanna this to end.
Get a grip. I immediately slapped myself to stop my concerning train of thoughts. Geez, in all of the people I could have met, I have to embarrass myself in front of him.
Ah, now I wish to disappear.
"Quiet now, aren't we?" I can feel his hands trying to remove my hands that covered my face. "Come on, that's not fair. I let you cry on my chest earlier."
After a bit of pulling and tugging, I finally gave up. He's just that irresistible and also very stubborn.
"Now we're talking!" I opened my eyes and was met with his blue ones. "You're feeling better?"
"... Dear lord."
"Ah? Wah! Why are you falling all of a sudden?!"
"I must've saved a nation from a disaster in my previous life…" I was limp in his arms. My body gave up just like that, there's no ounce of power left. My knees shook like a jelly and my vision is getting blurry because of the rush of serotonin in my veins.
"What are you talking about?" He's enjoying this weird situation. He's pulling my noodle arms and twisting my body as if I'm a kind of a marionette. "You're really weird." He says but he's laughing at my pathetic state. Guess being a clown for my whole life can be advantageous sometimes.
"Thank you." He finally let me sit on the white ground. Currently breathing heavily and in denial.
"Hmmmmmmmm…." He leaned closer. I should've known this man doesn't know the concept of personal space. "I've never seen you before." He then clapped his hand in an excited manner. "Then how about introducing ourselves?"
".... Okay."
"Me first! I'm Gojo Satoru! I'm 28 years old and I'm a teacher!" He extended his hand and I accepted it hesitantly, because I was in awe at the size difference of our hands.
"... I'm Y/N…"
"... And?"
"... I'm 21 years old…"
"Uh-huh."
"And uh, I'm a college student."
"Ah, what semester are you in right now?"
"Seventh semester."
"I see, then you will be graduating soon!" He shook my hand vigorously and my whole body also shook following his movement. "Congrats!"
"I haven't graduated yet, why are you congratulating me?" I smiled.
"Because that means I will be the first to congratulate you!"
"Ah, that makes sense."
"So, you're not asking about what major I studied?" He asked with a wiggle on his eyebrows.
"Why should I?"
"Well because I'm a teacher. Isn't it natural to ask what major I studied?"
"Well, yeah." I nodded. "But then, a sorcerer doesn't have to go to college in order to be a Jujutsu teacher, right?"
He made a big surprised O. His expression is very cute, I can't hold back my laugh. "Are you a psychic?!"
"You can say that." I grinned.
"Oh, a sorcerer and a psychic. That would be a dope story." He smiled, his smile could light up the whole continent.
"I bet." I smiled back.
We spent like hours talking about various things. Mostly about our worlds, he's beyond surprised to hear that curses doesn't exist in my world.
"... That would be a perfect place to live." He told me in a rather solemn voice.
"Maybe."
He raised his eyebrows in question.
"Because in my world, some people have to live with something worse than a curse." I smiled bitterly at the thought. "You can say that we're cursed in one way or another."
"...True," he said. I thought he's a nosy person who invades others' personal space as he likes, but he doesn't push further after that.
"Hey, Gojo."
"What?"
"..." I'm hesitating to say this. I know that our time will be over soon and I don't know if I will be able to meet him again. But I always want to say this to him if I can. This is maybe just a dream, but my heart says otherwise— that's why I need to tell him this.
"... What are you going to say?"
"——————."
His eyes widened after hearing my words.
"Be careful." I told him with a sad smile. His surprised face somehow made me feeling hurt. "I don't want you to hurt even more."
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Satoru woke up in a cold sweat.
"... Just a dream." It's supposed to be a dream. But why is his heart racing and filled with such uneasiness?
The words from the stranger in his dream keeps haunting his mind even with his hardest effort to forget it.
"Fuck." He bit his lips as the memory of his dream comes back again.
"Suguru Getou is alive but his body is taken over by Noritoshi Kamo."
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Masterlist
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salaciousslut · 4 months
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I love hearing what other ppl like so please do!! I also like R&B a lot i just forgot to mention it when i was talking abt genres i like earlier bc i was too focused on rap 🤭 and im the same way tbh! Unless im a real big fan of an artist i'll wait a while, but sometimes like with Paramore's After Laughter i couldnt stand to accept the sound change so i waited a year to listen to it 🫣
I'm going out in an hour or two and im probably not gonna drink till i get back home late. Im always DD since i live the furthest. I wish you could come out with me and my friends i feel like you'd have fun with us. But my friends usually get crossfaded with me bc i always bring some weed. im ok to drive when its worn off a bit im safe i promise 🫣 but i drop everyone off so im used to getting home late a lot. I wish i could hear you giggling i bet you have a cute laugh sweetheart<3 i bet youre really fun to be around when you're drunk<3
I do the same but im trying to get back into better habits like journaling, like sometimes i just cant cry because ive bottled everything up for so long. So i very much urge ppl to cry when they can because its not a great feeling not being able to cry when you need to cry. Like even if its small, cry about it its fine. Its human to feel the full spectrum of emotion.
I forgot what voice i used for my character but i think it was some generic dude voice, i have been a little out of practice with my deeper voices though. But my voice is usually pretty deep anyway, i pitch my voice up a bit when im at work bc i dont want to scare the old timers too much. I hate to admit that my favorite voices to try to do are meatwad from aqua teen hunger force and stitch, theyre like the same voice to me 🤭 i do it for funsies, but in my teen years i did it a lot bc my friends gave me approval for it 🤭
Soo maybe i might budget to get my hands on those perfumes ☺️ i'd like to know what your favorite perfumes smelled like on first hand bases. This is a second best, best would be smelling it on your neck<3 theres a certain cologne i fell in love with years go that ive been trying to get my hands on, its polo red by ralph lauren it had smelled so wonderful to me.
Candles are a lot to take care of so i get it. I just have two main rules i follow for the life of my candle and the safety of my cats. Im the type of person where if i see soot in your candles i try to clean that out to lessen fire risk bc they can be dangerous, its something ppl never notice but thats ok i just want them to be safe. I used to play with the wax like that too!! It low key led to me trying to experiment a little with wax play which was interesting to say the least.
You really are an adorable little puppy<3 its nice to know i was right about thinking you were shorter than me<3 i like short girls, tall girls are nice but short girls are better<3 esp when theyre a little older than me🤭 also ironically i dont own anything royal purple but maybe one day!
oooh i love r&b!! one of my close friends loves it too and will always rec me songs!! and honestly thats sooo fair about waiting to listen to paramore i was the same way!
im always dd too!! just bc i wanna make sure my friends are safe!! bc we all live in the same apartment complex but i know what u mean! i also just like taking care of my friends as u know! im very much rather drink at home bc its my lil safe space! but if im with people i trust, then i like to let loose. plus i wanna lose my inhibitions with you! ill be such a cute lap pet while u and ur friends are drinking and having fun!!
omg i have trouble crying too!! i call it my emotional constipation so ill put on a sad movie to try and cry!! but yes, heres to us trying to me more in tune with our emotions!!
hehe cute cute cute i wanna hear now!! i think i also have a pretty deep voice so i bet we would sound amazing together!! also hehe stitch i love it!! i bet u sound sooo cute
oh trust me, i plan going to bbw soon and smelling you 🫣🥰 and omg i love polo red!! it smells sooo yummy
i started using a candle warmer rather than lighting my candles bc i got scared of the soot, and i know ur not suppose to keep candles lit for a long time but i love the smell so much!! and yes i love wax play. this is kinda embarrassing but i was doing wax play for someone and he had the audacity to get made at me bc i was moaning and enjoying it rather than in pain. smh just let me enjoy the warm feeling on my skin ya know?
i loveeeee being just a lil shorter, tall people kinda intimidate me at first but ur the perfect height!! hehe lets cuddle bc im sooo touch starved and lazy and in a cuddly mood rn. and omg how old are u??
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fossadeileonixv · 2 years
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Minor Mercato Overreactions
What exactly is going on?
Ok, lots of people are losing their heads over the lack of, well, much of anything. If you're asking yourself, "why are people doing this?", or even if you're doing this yourself, let me remind you at the Fossa, here, #IMIT & #IPIT!
Also...
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Let's take a trip down memory lane, shall we?...because it really feels like we've been here before
SUMMER 2021 MERCATO
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SUMMER 2022 MERCATO
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I could've posted more but wasn't really feeling invested in looking for dumb negative tweets. The point is that every summer people start losing their god damn minds as early as June 2nd if some FIFA-video game-esque transfer hasn't taken place. As long as Maldini is here Milan will not be going back to their old reckless ways so it's time to adjust expectations.
Milan and Maldini want players who fit the profile (usually young, modest wages) but who WANT to be there. Think Theo, Tonali, Tomori, Maignan, even Diaz. He’s basically put the ball in CDK’s court to force the move like the others just mentioned. Plus, I think these types of players are far less likely (but not impossible) to pull a Donnarumma/Hakan/Kessie and hold Milan hostage with their wage demands or leaving on a free because they respect the club and Maldini. This type of philosophy can be frustrating for fans but it doesn't mean Milan won't be able to compete domestically or in Europe, it means they have to be better at their jobs then all those free-spending clubs out there, and I'm ok with that.
Moreover, what's happening in European football is nearing a crescendo when it comes to unsustainability. Even if those big-spending teams want to keep spending, at some point in the very near future there are going to be luxury taxes or something similar to help level the playing field. Those of us who follow other American sports and have for awhile will know that the NBA and MLB had leagues in similar situations in the 1990s and were forced to adjust. Many of you here have heard me sing the praise of the NFL for how that league is structured, which a firm salary cap and shared revenue (like a bunch of commie b*stards) has led to a league that boasts more than half of the top 50 most valuable sports franchises on the planet and provides a structure that any team with excellent scouting, management, and coaching can turn it around in 2-3 years. Milan's current philosophy will have them well-positioned and ahead of much of Europe when, not if, these changes come.
One of our fellow commentators shared an article in the last post discussing Barcelona's current financial situation and I highly suggest you read it. If you have time find the Twitter thread from Swiss Ramble that it's largely sourced from. Basically Barcelona are continuing to play with fire as evidenced by this last tweet in the thread:
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Here's the link (and thank you @rizaariefianto):
FINAL THOUGHTS
I understand everyone wants to see Milan spend at least a little something especially after winning the Scudetto. I do too. But, BUT I know I would rather have this be deliberate, a locked-in effort to find young talent AND pieces that will fit the project. Not every player is going to be a sign, use, then sell for big profit type of player because times-are-a-changin'.
Finally, Milan are returning every starter except Kessie, and while some depth would be nice, Tonali and Bennacer are more than capable to dominate that area of the pitch. What Milan needs are smart acquisitions, not a d**k measuring contest with EPL teams or PSG or Real.
RANDOM THINGS
Milan have another friendly this Wednesday vs NOT Bundesliga Wolfsberger and it will be on ESPN+. It also looks like the friendly against Marseille will be on ESPN+ as well this Saturday. We'll try to find other carriers for the match day post.
I found out about this app that apparently shows all of the Milan friendlies as well as replays and highlights (I only have the Apple link but I would guess there's an Android version as well):
Season starts in about 3 weeks. Can't believe it's almost time to defend AND CHASE the Scudetto.
Current roster (thanks Mike!):
KEEPERS Maignan Tatarasanu Mirante
DEFENDERS Theo Ballo-toure Calabria Florenzi; Tomori Kjaer Kalulu Gabbia
MIDS Tonali, Bennacer, Bakayoko, Pobega, Krunic, Adli, Diaz
ATTACKERS Messias, Saelemaekers, Origi, Giroud, Zlatan, Lazetic, Leao, Rebic
I’ve seen Adli play in these two friendlies and while I haven’t been blown away he does look like he has some skill. What I’ve also noticed and have seen people here and on Twitter say is they can’t believe how slow he is, which for me is a giant red flag. The current squad is largely premised on speed in nearly every position and unless he’s Modric passing the ball I’m a bit worried about him running the #10 spot and killing Milan’s counter-attacking game…which as Mike likes to point out was the best in the league last season. Milan needs production from this position but what it doesn’t need is another Suso on the pitch.
Daniel Maldini is on the move with a loan to Spezia. There is no option to buy is seems, which was always kind of a weird rumor. I mean, I just don't see Maldini selling his son while he's in charge unless his kid asks for it.
That's about it. Drop us a note or share some of your thoughts on Milan or really, about anything. I'm really in need of a new chicken or pork marinade recipe...
Forza Milan
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boxedforyourdemise · 2 years
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I've decided I will utilize my "definitely 18+" tag a lot more I'm this account considering how big a role sex and drugs (both medical and recreational) play in my life. If you're a minor following me please filter this tag specifically as these posts will be nsfw and involve explicit language or extremely adult topics. I am a grown half-woman (lol I don't think I've ever really explained my personal identity or anything like that since reviving this blog) and I honestly just want to be able to be honest and as open as I can be while still maintaining my privacy and safety. I have a thriving sex life and a unique perspective on a lot of things and I regularly use and discuss the use (and abuse) of substances and I believe wholeheartedly in minors being safe, but I also believe in letting teenagers who are in high school and already have exposure to sexual topics or are already having sex/exploring sexuality, themselves, judge for themselves whether or not something is safe to view or triggering for them. I believe teenagers are often mocked and dismissed as being ignorant and "thinking they know everything when they know nothing" and hormonal. Teenagers are often kept from knowledge because nobody really listens when they speak on mature topics. And generally I believe minors should hold off on exploring BDSM until they are adults, but I don't believe in keeping knowledge from people, even teens, no matter the context. I think if you're old enough to learn about sex or to feel arousal and understand it, you're old enough to learn about more extreme things you can explore once you reach maturity and gain an understanding of the laws, nuances, etiquette, and general rules or misconceptions around sex and sexuality and kink. There's a lack of supportive sex ed for teens (especially teens who aren't necessarily into vanilla things) and I have always believed in education and sharing of knowledge. If you ever have a question about anything I post about, feel free to pitch it no matter your age, but please keep things strictly to education on the topics. It's not appropriate for me to talk about my sex life with a minor as I would an adult. It's not appropriate to expose a minor to sex before they explore the topic themselves or experience it or have questions about it based on learning.
If you see something in porn and want to ask if that's real or accurate or whatever ill happily inform you but I will not be personal with you.
Anyway, that little tangent and offer for help out of the way... Onto instructions!
If you don't know how to filter tags so they don't show up or so that posts with the tag are censored/warn about said tag: the option can be found in your general blog settings for your main blog. It will be labeled as "filtering".
On mobile it looks like this:
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And on desktop it looks like this:
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To get to this page from the action bar you go into the tab labeled "Account" under "Settings". Then just type the tag you specifically want to filter and voila! You will now see less posts with the tag and all posts involving it will warn you that the post has a filtered tag attached. For ease, the tag to filter is
Definitely 18+
And if you're super worried or in middle school also filter the tag
Maybe 18+??
As those posts are for the YA audience from like 16 to 18+ and are generally just my stoner posts or innuendos tbh. Basically anything I'm not comfortable tagging as definitely 18+ but also that I'm no comfortable leaving untagged lol
I also do have an nsfw blog but I got really paranoid and insecure one day and kind of shut it down for a while lol
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kiridarling · 3 years
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𝐐𝐔𝐄𝐄𝐍 𝐎𝐅 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐍𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓.
request | Can I have royalty au (soon to be king bakugou) (and soon to be queen reader) , katsuki and reader are supposed to be getting married (not to eachother) but they end up sneaking around and doing IT with eachother so top!kats , exhibition , begging , dumbification and spanking THANK YOU💞💞
this lovely request was submitted for the kissing booth event (the rest of the drabbles come out soon, ahem :)) so, if this was your request, um...hAHA whoops.
katsuki bakugou | f!reader, royalty!au, infidelity, nondescript!fiancés, angst (gasp), fingering, exhibitionism, dumbification + more! minors dni!
— 3.7k words
“C'mon, princess...can I make you feel good once last time?
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You're getting married.
No more ignorance is bliss, no more I didn't know any better—this is when you put all your childish antics to the side and fucking woman up, now in charge of the safety of your kingdom and its inhabitants and whatnot. So yes, you must snuff all your adolescent tendencies, and that includes sleeping with the Crowned Prince of the neighboring kingdom behind your fiancé's backs.
But, boys are stubborn. And stupid.
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Ding ding ding!
"Excuse me, Everyone!" Your fiancé announces to the crowd in your dining room as he stumbles to his feet, spoon clinking against his glass. He nearly trips, but no one sees except yourself. "I would like to make a toast."
You frown. This wasn't a part of the rehearsal dinner.
"First of all, I would like to thank you all for being able to be with us tonight," he says, shoving the glass higher in the air. As red wine splashes over the rim, you think to remind him that isn't a toast, it's the beginning of a speech, but your comments have rarely deterred the man in the past. "As you’re all aware, this marriage is vital. Not only for our kingdom, but for the neighboring kingdom as well."
Your fiancé regards the Bakugou’s with a lift of his chalice. In the coming weeks, two arranged marriages will melt the four most influential kingdoms into two, and your fiancé and his family had the genius to throw a massive Gala to celebrate it. You wouldn’t be surprised if they got off to the idea of stretching themselves so thin their hair falls out at age thirty; they won’t even allow you to choose the type of dress for your wedding.
"I would also like to thank my lovely, lovely wife, for just being so... lovely.” Your fiancé chuckles, accompanied by an uncomfortable massage to your shoulder. The guests find amusement in how whipped he is as he gazes your way expectantly, conceivably wishing to see you swoon at the compliment. All you give him is a blank face. His elation falters.
"You know, when I first met this woman, I knew she was going to be the love of my life," your fiancé shakes your glare off. You purposely block out the rest of his story in favor of folding and unfolding your napkin again, puffing under your breath at the cheesy comment.
"Sap," you grunt to yourself, obviously. You don't expect anyone to hear, but there's a snort to your right. Your eyes lift from your lap—and straight into Katsuki's smug blood red ones. He winks at you from across the table and your eyes roll at that, though there's a small smile playing on your face that's impossible to hide.
"Isn't that right [Y/N]!...[Y/N]?"
You blink yourself back to life, eyes reluctantly leaving Katuski's hypnotic ones for the pair that make you nauseous, "Oh—u-um, yep!"
The place bursts in laughter and there's even a little smile dancing on Katsuki's face. He catches you staring so your eyes divert to your lap, but his remain a physical force against you for the rest of the night.
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*selene — the greek goddess of the moon
The balcony is much nicer than the ballroom.
For one, it's the farthest place you could have gone from the commotion, all the way on the opposite side of the castle. It's a solid five-minute walk when you aren't in heels and a heavy petticoat, but it provides a lovely view of your front yard, subjecting you to watch the early-sleepers leave in their carriages to call it a night. Meanwhile, *Selene watches you from her telescope the moon with a sigh and a sad smile, because she's the only one who knows how completely and utterly alone you will be.
You glare at her—the goddess doesn't waver.
Bitch.
It's no secret that Gala’s like these get overwhelming—especially when you're the center of attention. You see Lord Shinsou (Earl) stuff the eager Lord Kaminari (Baron) into his silver-plated carriage before looking around to ensure no one saw, and blanche upon seeing your figure stood on the balcony. You salute so he knows his secret is safe with you, and relief washes over his face before he too hops into the carriage. What a scandal, you giggle.
Plenty of couples resign home after that; it makes you uneasy. You're unsure as to why, but you have the ever-increasing urge to nip at your fingernails until you don't have them anymore, and jamming the sharpest point of your heel into the concrete seems like the only proper way to release enough kinetic energy before you explode.
"He loves me."
He does, embarrassingly so—so what's the issue?
There isn't an issue; there shouldn't be. He reminds you how pretty you are and you compliment his influence. Neither of you are marrying down. You look good together. The kingdom's future power couple if you will, where you two supposedly mold the great future in your peculiarly young hands. There isn't an issue. You're the one for him, and he's the one for you.
The balcony door whines open. You don't turn around, praying whoever it is will see that it's occupied and turn the other cheek. Yet, the stomp of whoever's boots only grow louder until you’re adjacent to a shadow of a being, his chin lifted towards the stars. You catch a glimpse of blond hair, though dyed a pale white by the silver moon, and you two stand in a strangely comfortable silence, watching carriages roll out of your driveway.
The silence doesn’t last for long, though. It never does.
"D’ya always go disappearing like that?"
You frown. "What?"
"I don't fuckin' know," Katsuki grumbles—he has yet to look at you. Seems like Selene captures more than one person's attention tonight. "Blinked and you were gone."
Your frown only deepens, and you return your attention to the courtyard. "I didn't know you were paying attention."
The ash-blond presses his forearms against the railing for support. "I wasn't. He was."
Oh.
"Said he wants you to come back, so," Katsuki clicks his tongue, carmine red eyes finally flicking your way through the darkness. You don’t dare look at him. “You run off often, or what?"
"Tell him I'll come back in a second," you sigh, balancing your face in your hand. Katsuki says nothing, but he doesn't leave, and you hate that you don't mind.
Until he points towards a couple crossing the lawn and says, "Oi, that's the Duke from my fiancé's kingdom. Fucker tried to poison my dad for the throne—straightened him out real quick.”
"Why are you talking to me?" You snap like a cornered animal. Katsuki lifts an eyebrow.
"What? I can't have a goddamn conversation?"
"I—" your chest rises and falls with a reason to why he can't, but you can only come up with one—and you don't want to think about it.
"Listen. I don't like these things either, alright?" He huffs defensively, so defensively that you have to take a step back. "If I have the opportunity to get some fresh air, I'm gonna fuckin' take it."
You shrug, supposing it makes you one and the same. The wind blows, not harsh, but harsh enough to ruffle your gown, and make the gold jewelry decorating Katsuki's tunic jingle.
“So. I guess this is it, ain’t it?”
You sigh, “Katsuki, you know we—“
"Yeah yeah, that's all you fuckin' say," he growls bitterly, and you blink in a poor attempt to find where the animosity came from. His face twists in an ugly way as he sits his hands on his hips, nose scrunched to mockingly pitch his voice that doesn't sound like yours at all. "We can't, we shouldn't—"
"Because we shouldn't!" You nearly shout, and Katsuki jumps from how quickly you raise your voice. "Because—because if we get caught, we're fucked. And I can't go to sleep terrified that I'll wake up to an exposé tomorrow morning and get beheaded by the afternoon. So...please. Just stop."
Katsuki clicks his tongue.
"You don't love that asshole."
Your throat feels tight—much too tight to be comfortable, and your chest rises and falls with disbelief as you search for the words before you can talk again, eyes never dropping from the stars. You've had this conversation, fuck, you have it too often; often enough to know that he would say those exact words, and enough to know precisely what you'll say in response.
"I love him, Katsuki."
"No, no you fuckin' don't," the ash-blond chucks a laugh and it's nothing short of acrid, his words eating away at your skin more than you'd like them to. You sigh, resting your forearms on the railing too.
"I'm not having this conversation with you."
"Always gotta be so goddamn emotionally unavailable, huh?" He growls, glare set on the mountains presented in front of you. You feel his suit jacket hit your freezing shoulders, unaware of the cool temperatures until you feel the cloth brush against goosebumps. It’s your turn to laugh bitterly.
“Careful. People might think we’re getting married to each other.”
“One day you’ll let me fuckin’ live,” he grunts, and your eyes meet for the first time. His usual red is dyed a deep purple by the moonlight, their usual hardness traded for something much softer. “Can’t even give you a jacket when you’re shivering like a goddamn leaf in the wind.”
You give him a look of utter exhaustion because you’re tired—tired of all this running around and hiding, the secrecy. It eats at your insides like a caterpillar does a leaf, knowing that you go to sleep every night to a man who’ll barely touch you, but at the same time, feeling guilty that you don’t need nor want him to.
“Why are you here?”
Katsuki clicks his tongue. His warm body settles behind yours, close enough to feel the warmth but not close enough to feel him. “You looked lonely.”
“I thought my fiancé told you to get me?” You ask, raising a suspicious eyebrow. Katsuki rolls his eyes, his arms settling on both sides of yours.
“He did. But I didn’t refuse the damn request either.”
“You saw my loneliness all the way from the ballroom. What an eyesight,” you scoff. Katsuki’s eyes narrow, but it’s clear he’s fighting a grin because you’re a little shit who loves giving him a hard time. The ash-blond’s chest rises and falls, and he bites the inside of his cheek.
“You know what I mean.”
You snort, tilting your head to the right. You suppose you do.
“And I’m marrying a bitch,” he adds to his list of grievances, his hands finding yours to gently play with your fingers. You nod in agreement. A bitch she is.
“And...I’m really going to fuckin’ miss you.”
It might as well pass for nothing but a breath, eyes trained on your held hands. His chest suspends like he has more to say, but his teeth tear at the inside of his cheek before he can. “I—fuck, I get it, okay? I’m a selfish asshole—“
“This doesn’t have to do wit—“
“And I really, really need to get my fuckin’ priorities straight. I mean, they are, just not in the way they should be.”
“Hey,” you chastise, shaking his hands for his attention. “You can’t control who you love, okay?"
Katsuki grumbles at that but you refuse, turning around to look him in the eyes.
"And neither can I.”
You let go of his hands in favor of pulling him down via his cheeks and giving him a big fat kiss on the lips. It’s peckish and brief, but it’s sweet and gets your point across. It's comfortable.
“The hell was that for?” Katsuki asks once you pull away. Though you see him struggle to hide a grin, eyes squinting more than they should.
“Easy,” you say, stepping forwards (as if there’s any space for that), “You looked lonely.”
Katsuki snorts, dropping his head, “Bastard.”
“And I’m being married off to an asshole,” you lament, pulling his face so close to the point you’re sure the strain on his back has got to be anything but sexy. He accommodates anyways—Katsuki always has; and night seems to suspend along with his baited breath as he waits for the next line, eyes shining with a painful hope you’re about to confirm.
“And I’m really, really going to miss you,” you say, shaking your head at how utterly true that statement is. Fuck.
The vulnerability slowly fades from his eyes at that, and Katsuki hums, clammy hands finding their rightful place around your hips.
“You shouldn’t call him an asshole, you know,” he says, face inching so close you can smell the champagne on his breath. “He means well.”
“I didn’t know you cared,” you quip back, raising an eyebrow. Katsuki shrugs, and you don’t realize he’s backing you up until your back kisses the cool railing.
“Well. I can’t help but feel a little bad,” he says cheekily as he inches closer, “‘Cause I make you feel so good, don’t I, Princess? Last time I checked, better than he ever could.”
You scoff at his audacity though it’s all good-natured, eyes preferring the moon over his heated gaze as he turns you around to face the courtyard.
“Ah, ah,” he tuts, redirecting your attention using a finger on your jaw, “Eyes on me, Princess. You look really fuckin’ pretty under the stars, y’know.”
You snort at the compliment, rolling your eyes.
“‘M serious. A fuckin’ goddess,” he growls, leaving wet kisses up the column of your neck. Your breath hitches as he reaches your sweet spot and sucks, and you’re swatting him away before he can leave a mark.
“I sai—“
“One last time, Princess,” he bargains lowly as his hot hands slide their way from your waist to your breasts, taking their sweet time. Katsuki hooks his chin on your shoulder. “Lemme—Can I make you feel good one last time?”
You’re nodding with a whimper before you can berate yourself for being so fucking easy, the thought of not being able to indulge yourself with this, with him, any longer tosses any and all resistance out the window.
“Good,” Katsuki hums, tweaking your nipples through the bodice. “‘M gonna pay you back for being so good to me, yeah? For puttin' up with all my shit."
You scoff, mouth dropping to tell him you weren't putting up with his shit, but then a warm hand lands on your thigh—somehow, he's found a way under your dress. The hand slides up inner thigh and you feel Katsuki's chest shudder against your back as he finally reaches where you need him most.
"K-Kats—"
"Shhh, you don't want them to hear us, do you?" He grunts, pulling your panties to the side. You shiver from the change in temperature, watching another Duke and Duchess of half-drunkenly stumble into their carriages for the night, before there's a crack of a whip and hooves beat towards the exit. It's only a reminder of how painfully exposed you two are—one glance towards the balcony and any onlooker would know exactly what's happening. You hate it.
You hate that you don't.
"Atta girl," Katsuki purrs, groaning as he inserts a finger. You shiver, the weight of his being practically trapping you against the railing. "Always so fuckin' tight. I swear that asshole never fucks you right."
Katsuki's never been an impatient man and fills you with a second finger awfully fast, chuckling when you bite into the meat of your palm to hold back a whimper. His hips start to grind against the puff of your dress and he groans as quietly as he can, carelessly shoving down the sleeve of his suit jacket to bite into your shoulder.
You let out a broken moan much too loud for this time of night and it prompts Katsuki's free hand to stuff an equal amount of fingers into your mouth. "Y'know, something tells me you wanna get caught. You want the whole world to know how much you fuckin' hate that bastard, huh?"
You choke as Katsuki slides in a third digit next to the second, the slap of his palm against your pussy becoming nothing but obscene as your slick accentuates the sound. His hips speed up against your ass and that's enough friction to have the ash-blond groaning, along with the spit that drips down his forearm.
"So dirty for me, Princess," his hips stutter when you push back, tongue laving over the bite mark you'll probably have to conceal in the morning. Asshole. "You wanna cum like this, don't you? You're gonna cum all over my fingers in front of the entire royal court. Dumb little girl, can't even keep her mouth shut to keep us from gettin' caught."
You jam your heel into the balcony concrete so hard you positive it cracks before you're coming all over Katsuki's fingers, nearly choking on the ones in your mouth as you release the loudest broken moan you have that night. Katsuki's hips stutter against you and you're positive he's filling his boxers from the airy moan that follows, and his hand goes limp in your mouth before it slides out completely.
Your chests balloon in unison, his body draped over yours, and as you two catch your breath under the moonlight, you can’t help but think how much you’re going to miss this.
"Run away with me."
"I—" he does this. He always does this. He makes you feel on top of the world, acting like everything's fine, and then he pulls this shit on you. You look everywhere but him, nearly scoffing in disbelief. "Katsuki—"
"C'mon, Princess," Katsuki scrambles to flip you by the waist until your back is flush against the railing again and he’s cradling both your hands in his semi-damp ones. There’s a look in his eyes you don’t like, and it makes your chest burn. "Across the sea, people are movin’ over there and I—I know someone there, okay? Someone we could stay with, maybe help us get back on our feet an-and I found a fuckin’ ferry guy to take us across, and I can even pay him a little extra, o-or you, or—"
"Katsuki," you give him a sad smile, squeezing his hands tight. There's hope, too much hope in his eyes and it's fucking blinding. "Running away? I—this is—we have an obligation, we can't jus—"
"It'll be fine," he insists, stepping forwards and squeezing you back twice as hard. You sigh."I—the two kingdoms can merge or whatever the fuck they wanna do and then we'll be—"
"Katsuki."
"I—fuck Princess, I don't beg but goddammit, I'll do whatever you fuckin' want, get on my knees, I ca—"
"You really want to know what I want?"
Katsuki freezes. It's the first time you've ever seen some semblance of emotion in him that isn't anger or lust, with carmine red irises swimming in unshed tears—and fuck, you hate the sight. You want to shoot yourself in the fucking foot for what you’re about to do, but it’s for the best. It always is.
"Love her."
Katsuki looks at you, and his face drops, chest shuddering.
"I can't."
You drop his hands in favor of holding his face, thumbing at the hot tears running as they fall. God, Katsuki’s pretty—too pretty for his own good and he doesn’t even know it. His unsteady hands find themselves massaging your ribs and your foreheads knock together. "You need to try. Love her as much as you love me, yeah?"
"'S fuckin' impossible," Katsuki says with a wet snort, shaking his head with eyebrows raised. You giggle, throat impossibly tight.
"Almost, then? For me."
Katsuki’s red eyes stare at you through the darkness. You have half a mind to look the other way, but you figure you owe him this if nothing else, and as he lovingly absorbs your being under the moonlight for the last time, you really wish you could take your words back.
"I'll...fuck. Fine. I'll try." Katsuki resigns with a shrug, shaking his head. You two sniffle in unison and you suppress the strange urge to pinch him. "'M not gonna try to get over you, though. Sorry, not sorry."
You roll your eyes at that but it's all good-natured, followed by a choke you struggle to hide as his arms coil around your waist, "Then I won't either."
A genuine grin spreads across his face, and it’s borderline giddy—and a stark contrast against the waterworks. "She finally fuckin' admits it."
"Figured it was about time," you give him a wobbly smile before your eyes flicker to his, red blurring from being so close. Selene looks upon both of you with a reminiscent sigh.
"I love you, Katsuki Bakugou."
Katsuki sniffs before he laughs; it's wet, and near bitter, and he pulls you so close your face nearly shoves into his chest. "Fuck. Fuck, you're an asshole, you know that?"
"This is when you say it back," you bargain, squishing his cheeks. Katsuki presses his forehead deeper into yours.
"I love you too, Asshole."
He speaks with a softness you've never heard and it's like a gunshot to the heart, and as his lips inch closer to yours as your hands slide to thumb at his ears. One last kiss wouldn't hurt, would it?
Until there's a whistle and the click of footsteps. You and Katsuki jump a mile apart.
"Oh, [Y/N]! You're still out here in the cold?" Your fiancé asks with a raised eyebrow, but it seems like that's only an afterthought as he turns to Katsuki to say, "Your wife’s found the alcohol."
"Great," the ash-blond groans, understanding the translation—your fiancé is piss drunk in the ballroom.
"I do recommend you take her home. She's making quite a mess of the eclairs. And her face."
Katsuki heads inside without giving you a second glance, and your fiancé gives him a solid pat on the way in before turning to you halfway through the doorway, "Are you coming inside, Darling?"
"In a moment," you say with a smile. Your hand never leaves the railing. "Just getting some fresh air."
"Alrighty, then. I'll be in the bedroom. Waiting~" he winks, and with that, he's spinning on his heel, and you're alone with the moon again.
You watch Katsuki guide his inebriated fiancé into the carriage lovingly, with a smile on his face that isn't quite the one he wears with you but close enough, whispering whatever pleases her at the time with a chaste kiss on the cheek. You feel comfort in knowing that he has someone to love and someone to be loved by. He doesn't look your way—not once.
It's not until they drive away that you realize you still have his suit jacket draped over your shoulders. You don't doubt he did that on purpose, either.
Asshole.
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i-need-air · 3 years
Text
"Dude" — Bakugou Katsuki x Reader.
Summary: Your former bully, Midori, has confessed her undying love for one of the most famous guys at U.A.; you're just venting gossiping about it with Mei, not knowing Bakugou Katsuki is right around the corner, listening;
Warnings: None. Well, Bakugou Katsuki having various anger induced strokes > the normal > no warnings; light crackfic? subtle ending;
Word count: 4.5k;
[ Part 2 ];
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"She confessed to him." You grinned, throwing a bunch of fries into your mouth like the absolute animal you were.
Mei on the other hand continued her work on whatever in the world her new prototype, or "baby", was. Still, you had the honor of having half of her attention, which was a compliment to say at least.
She just smiled, shaking her head, leading you to continue, not knowing a blond was quite literally behind the corner, just outside the door leading to the support department, frown on his face.
"She came to class giggling like an idiot saying she's got a plan." You made a face into the distance, remembering your classmate's obnoxious squeal. "Ugh, she started telling the Divas how she's gonna have The Bakugou Katsuki in the bag." An ugly snort left your body, which earned an amused chuckle from Mei.
Both of you were pretty well known to be very good friends, and as much as you hated to admit it, you were both quite the social pariahs too. She was a little bit strange or weird, as some called her, but not for a single second she cared, which was the reason you admired the girl so much in the first place. Meanwhile you've taken the role of the bitch of the whole school by far. Sadly, you were placed in the same class as your archenemy, only increasing your chances of being called said endearing term.
Middle-school was a nightmare to say at least, getting bullied for your looks, the way you spoke or dressed, anything really as long as you were the one being mocked. And who was the one doing the bullying? Midori. Stunning, graceful, baby-faced Midori. Petite yet elegant, a devil in disguise. Whoever crossed her path suffered her malice unless she had something to gain from them.
And now, sweet Midori was in the U.A.'s General Studies, coinciding with you in the majority but not all classes. It had to do with the tragedy that your quirk was so rare that the principal Nezu had to adjust a new schedule just for you. Just kidding, it was amazing. The actual tragedy was seeing her face every day.
Back to your heartbreaking backstory and origin; time made you tough, comments made you build a wall so tall and thick nobody could crumble it. Backstab after backstab made you learn that not everyone has good intentions, but in your loneliness you found Hatsume Mei. So honest and dedicated, so raw and passionate. A good person. The type of person your parents promised you'd someway cross paths with and gain such a strong friendship that nothing could tear it apart.
Becoming friends with her was easy, kinda. It took snapping back at Midori when she started her normal bullying routine on Mei, which ignored it without a care. You stepped in and the rest is history. It did feel good though, calling her a pathetic bitch before turning to the stranger with a cool gadget in her hands to compliment it. And, since she's a sucker for her babies, you had to deal with an hour of sparkly eyes and monologues about her plans and prototypes.
Funny girl, Mei. You remember thinking but the following day you passed by her usual spot to fill your curiosity, asking if she did solve the problem she was complaining about.
"He was the one she was planning to ask out?" She screamed at you, head inside a giant metal gauntlet and the reason you two started talking about said man in particular. News were extra-fresh anyway.
"Oh, yeah!" You shook your head, ashamed to exist in the same general proximity as a person like your former bully. "He's gonna be so rich and famous!" A high pitched squeal left your mouth as you tried to copy her voice. "Poor fucking guy, if only he knew."
"But people know she's a bitch!" She screamed again, repairing or adjusting something with almost all of her body inside the gauntlet. A smile, genuine and soft this time, formed on your face. The pink-haired girl wasn't one to talk bad about others or even care, but it was clear she wasn't particularly fond with Midori either, although the conversation was more for you to vent rather than gossip. Sure it was.
"Like the people from the Hero Department even care about us, the commoners." With a roll of the eyes, you followed. "If he's smart, he'll run away. If he's an asshole, he could use her too."
"What do you mean?" Pink flocks of hair suddently submerged from the gadget, eyes curious zooming on you. That probably got more than 50% of her attention and it was a new personal goal while she was at the workshop.
With shrugged shoulders, your answer came nonchalant. "He could date her and dump her like she's nothing. Would serve her right for all the shit she's talking about him." But the only response you got was a short quizzical look, followed by your exagerated sigh. "She's talking shit about him constantly, but then says he's hot and that his personality doesn't matter anyway. Money, fame, looks. She has a whole fucking life-plan! Then calls him a rabid dog!"
"Woah—" that surprised her.
"Woah indeed! Insane. It's insane. I don't know the guy but no one deserves that shit." When you got no response, you continued your speech, munching in the food with passionate hunger, words coming out almost indistinguishable. "Doubt he'd play her though. He looks like a smart guy. I've seen the Sports Festival—" you picked up your burger, giving it heart eyes. "—and I've seen the news. He's probably a good guy too, the issue is people don't see that and... Well, I understand what's it to be judged... Not many have what it takes to be a real hero but he does. Hope he finds happiness in life." Much talk for someone that doesn't know shit about the guy in particular, but even so faint, your gut instinct was trained well enough to spot malice and he lacked that. "And a therapist." And there's the little shit in you that had to drop a cheeky comment.
Mei's gaze turned downwards and even if you could see her brain do mental gymnastics to solve whatever problem she had in front of her super-eyes, she also contemplated your words with great care.
"He comes here from time to time—" she grins, smacking the grenade looking gauntlet with her weird utensil. "I noticed you two are similar." Your face twisted, eyes wide towards the girl.
Similar how? He was loud, bold with a foul mouth, definitely needed a therapist for those unresolved anger issues... But he was also bright as in whenever he went, people looked in his direction, like he shined; obviously strong, also from what you've heard smart, popular, lucky to be surrounded by kind people. Example being that very nice pink girl that had a joyous conversation with you the very first day of school and, much to your surprise, continued greeting and having sweet small talks with you every single time you saw each other. Or the blond haired guy that showed off a little bit too much and made dumb flirty comments with no bad intentions, the same blond that waved at you with enthusiasm when you'd cross paths. There was the red-head, Kirishima, that was an absolute gentleman, opening doors for you even if you had two functioning hands and smiled so bright it made your corneas burn, or also the dark haired guy, Sero, that you've seen helping literally anyone in need around the school campus with an easy going attitude and gentle grins. Bakugou Katsuki was surrounded by good people, good heroes just as amazing as him and if they liked him, he must've definitely had some good in him, right? Another point appeared in your mental presentation about the brash hero in the making was that he was way too attractive but the wise burried deep inside of you made that particular point dissappear. No need to think about that. Overall you weren't even remotely similar. Not even close. Two completely different human beings from two completely different worlds that would never collide. With that being said, there was the small chance that Mei hinted for you to get a therapist too, who knows.
"How even—"
"I mean!" She screwed something in place. "I mean in your— determination?"
"I wouldn't know that." You muttered.
"He screams I'm gonna be the best every time he's here—"
"Cute..." You vomit that endearment without thinking, but thankfully it got ignored.
"—and it always reminds me of you." A small chuckle left your mouth.
"Don't make fun of me."
"You say it too~"
"I just heal, Mei, it's not the same." Principal Nezu's speech, the speech he gave your parents months into the first year as they found themselves aware of your power made you hold your words. You had it in you. The potential. If incredible people like your teachers, like Shuzenji Chiyo or Principal Nezu twisted things around for your quirk, for how rare and powerful it is, you'd accept it.
"But you're gonna be the best healer ever, aren't you?" She taunted.
"Of course. Which reminds me—!"
"Hmm?" Her attention faded away slightly, but it wasn't a problem.
She cheered, both at you and at her finished masterpiece and proceeded to eat too, passing through the lunch hour without interruption.
"Recovery Girl is putting me on active duty at the infirmary from now on. Finally!"
Innocent pale purple eyes stared into deep crimson ones, furrowed brows covering them.
Bakugou Katsuki wasn't one to enjoy being annoyed or surprised and this extra managed to make him feel both things in a short notice.
Everyone around him froze in fear or wonder, awaiting his response without breathing or moving an inch. Meanwhile Whoever-she-was held a pink envelope in front of him, a perfume too sweet coming from it making him want to literally gag in the spot.
Another thing the boy did not appreciate was to have someone bullshit him. His senses were telling him to back off, alarms ringing in his head and those purple eyes held hidden intentions; he wasn't having any of it.
"Fuck off." He snapped, yet his stance was casual as he refused to move out of her way since she was the one that had the audacity to run into him.
Some gasps, even coming from his so-called idiotic friends, could be heard and an indignant Bakubro behind him as he got slapped in the shoulder but he did not care. Not until her lips started to tremble as she retreated her confession letter towards her chest dramatically. His eyebrow started to twitch at the sight.
It was a spectacle for anyone surrounding him.
"What's going on?" Shushes and whispers.
"Bakugou Katsuki just got a confession!" Gossip.
"What!? Who?!" Confusion.
"You said Bakugou Katsuki?!" Shock.
"Oh, she's pretty!" Awe.
"He told her to Fuck off! What an asshole!" Outrage.
"Is that Midori?" Surprise.
"The nerve—" Anger.
"Midori from—" Disbelief.
"Oh, my God, she's really doing it~!" Giggles.
He frowned deeper. If people were to talk about him, they should be talking about all the crap he's been doing and all the lives he saved, not because of a fake bimbo decided to cross his path.
Bakugou wasn't stupid either. With time he knew these things would eventually come in his direction, stuff he'd have to deal with in the future as fame would take over, but not now. He did not have time to entertain this show anyway.
There was only one destination in his mind and she was keeping him in the middle of the whole school cafeteria with prying eyes on them both.
"Bakugou, do something, she's about to cry!" Dunce Face harshly whispered, but turned towards the white haired girl that looked devastated in front of them. "Ignore him! Ask me out, I would never make you cry!"
He rolled his eyes so back in his head it almost hurt. With a need to hurl the food he just ate, he made a step to leave the scene but small hands with claw-like fingernails gripped his arm and he looked at her in utter disgust.
"No, I would never! He—" she sniffled but had no tears in her eyes. He gave her a scowl, trying to take his arm out of her grip but she scratched him in place with her tiny rat hands. "You're the one I love! I—" her bangs covered her face as she continued her show.
"Bakugou! Dude! Do something!" Shitty Hair said, his dumb and blind trust in people buying the act. A vein almost popped on Bakugou's forehead.
"I fucking said—" he pulled his arm so hard she fell on her knees by his side. "Fuck. Off."
Another set of gasps filled the room.
"Bakugou!"
One thing he did not want, even if he could tell it was a foul theater, was to hurt somebody. His asshole act ended at that but his pride stopped him from saying anything.
Glancing to see if she's hurt, Pink Idiot was by her side, helping her up and asking way too many fucking questions.
"No, I'm fine..." she said with such a meek voice he scoffed, also hearing all the shit everyone around him was talking.
"He's such a brute."
"What a mean guy—"
"She's crying!"
"Fucking asshole."
He gritted his teeth.
After the disaster with the League of Villains in the first year, people started to respect him for who he was yet one single, minuscule shit like this and they were all at his jugular.
"I took Bakugou-san by surprise." She excused his behavior to Ashido, which then suggested they should eat lunch together sometimes to make up for the trouble after apologizing in his behalf.
"Yeah, we'd love to have you around! Isn't that right, Bakugou?" The apologetic and almost pleading voice of his blond friend, if he ever was going to call him that anymore, just made him bare his teeth. If they wanted to get played like fools it was their problem, not his.
And that's how he found himself eavesdropping on the weirdo and an extra.
And with a single "Whatever." he left the cafeteria, going to check if his gauntlets were ready, annoyance oozing off him, making the sea of people part from his path. Except he didn't notice you rushing away a little bit in front of him, holding a bag of food, all amused.
Why the fuck was everyone talking about him? Can't they fucking keep his pretty name outta their mouths? With time and without finding a reason why the hell he was glued in place, he listened attentively, his suspicions confirmed and his ego hurt, but whoever was talking about him calmed his nerves a lot. He just needed to put a face to that voice. Just to see who's gossiping about him, nothing else.
With a full belly and a whole afternoon to study by Recovery Girl's side, you marched towards the infirmary after you bid your farewell to Mei. There was still time to walk around, grab something sweet for later and save any poor soul that Midori decided to sink her teeth in. It was common at this point, you getting in between her and her victims and taking the hit, yet somehow also being called a bitch by everyone. That's how high-school worked. She did have friends and they spread any word she spat. Vultures.
It was fine though. Hero [Y/N] is there to save the day no matter what. You scoffed at your own stupidity, turning the corner just to step on a leg that was sprawled on the floor.
He clicked his tongue, getting up with no worry in the world, but made no action to leave, settling for observing and analyzing you way too intensely.
"Watch where the fuck you're going, idiot." The man of the hour, the guy you've defended in front of your friend just screamed at you as he dusted off the imprint of your shoe left on his pants. Meanwhile you just paled in place before regaining your composture.
"Why are you sitting on the floor?" You said, tilting your head with a frown, already knowing you will not apologize.
Unimpressed by what was going on, even if you truly couldn't point out what really was going on, you made an attempt to move past him towards the vending machines not far behind, but he caught your arm in a firm grip.
You blinked stupidly at the skin contact.
"Heard you were talkin' shit."
Your stomach dropped. Legs almost gave up too if it weren't for his iron grip holding you still. In the silence and at the satisfaction of the reaction you let out, he smirked and raised his chin, only Mei's singing voice coming from her workshop could be heard. Realization hit you. Hit you? Bitchslapped you in the face and left a mark for sure, because your cheeks started feeling heated, tingly.
He dragged you away, maybe to have the privacy to murder you in peace, but your common sense kicked in and you came back from the land of the mortified.
Much like he did before, action you saw with your two own eyes and repeated, you pulled out of his strong grip and stared as he turned towards you, mouth already opened to probably eat you alive.
"I wasn't talking shit about you, dude." You quickly spoke first.
"You don't fucking know me." He growled back, taking a step towards you but like hell you'd back down.
"Don't need to be besties to say what I said." Without understanding why he was so agitated, the only thing left to do after this beautiful turn of events was to defend the honor remaining in you, so you raised your chin to be at par with him. The action clearly took him by surprise, making him glare more, if even possible.
"I don't fucking appreciate when extras talk about me behind my back!"
"I don't give a shit what you appreciate, dude." Your laugh was the complete opposite of his menacing loud voice, like ying and yang.
"Bakugou, the name's fucking Bakugou, you extra!" Bakugou recovered quickly at your snappy self, getting more bothered as you talked.
"Okay, dude." His hands fisted, shaking in place as he stared you down but did not continue.
Silence; the hallway was now filled with silence as he boiled in his own anger and as you raised your brows in confusion. Now what? Was it time to leave? You've never met anyone like him, this was peculiar—
"NOW IT'S WHEN YOU FUCKING TELL ME YOUR SHITTY NAME, YOU FUCKING DUMBASS!"
A second passes; two; at the third you're wheezing your lungs out, laughing at the ridiculousness of the scenario.
"What the fuck are you LAUGHING AT?!" His voice got louder just to top your howling. You did not expect that.
Through a sigh, regaining your breath, you say "It's [L/N] [Y/N].", seeing him retreat in his form and cross his arms. He was still seizing you up.
"If you have shit to say to me, say it to my fucking face, understood?"
"I—... Say what now?"
"I—." He copied in a mock, getting an incredulous look from you. "You stupid or what?" Your upper lip lifted, ready to cuss him to infinity and beyond but he continued. "Like about that bitch from before and shit—" even if he still was loud, he placed his hands in his pockets and looked more interested in the way the tiles on the wall were placed instead of your person. "An' like you told the weirdo—"
No time to be shocked at the implied; his last word enraged you, making your body shake with rage. "Don't fucking dare to call her a weirdo ever again."
Like a challenge, he snapped his face back at you, ready to take it.
"Or what?"
"Listen here, fucker—" now that was a nice surprised face he was pulling. "Just because I gave you a pat on the back in there doesn't mean you can disrespect people just because you think you're the shit. You're not. Now get out of my fucking way." With a final push to his shoulder, your mind was focused on going to the infirmary, steam almost coming out of your nostrils.
"Hey, extra!"
Ignore him, ignore him, ignore him. went through your mind, marching away without a glance back. Not until—
"[L/N]! You're a healer, hah?" That's interesting. He stood where you left him, watching.
"What's it to you?"
Someone sane would've left at your tone but this guy walked towards you then showed you his arms, recently scratched. Images came back to you about the cafeteria incident but did not underst—... did he want to get healed?
You scoffed.
"They're scratches, dude."
"They annoy me. Now heal." All the energy you had left in your body was channeled towards the slow blink you threw at him, at which he scoffed. But they did look nasty— and Midori did them. It was a curse by itself to look down at your own arms and remember that face, so the guardian angel in you decided to take control and be the better person.
Gentle fingers barely tapped his muscular arm. Smile crept up on your lips, feeling absolutely delighted at his obvious stiffness at the skin contact and the clear interest in his eyes, specially when the scratches started disappearing into nothing, leaving smooth silk skin under.
"Hey— Wha— Where the fuck do you think you're going?!" raspy voice got lost in the distance and one thought in your head.
"Want a lollipop for being a good patient too?" You mock and his face explodes in all shapes of red. It would've been great to mock him more, enthralled by his reactions, but with that you turned and left, ignoring the tingling under your fingers that should not be there and your stomping heart.
Did he wait all the lunchbreak to talk to you?
A long queue was ahead of you, earning the longest sigh out of your lungs. Life was pain sometimes. Mei couldn't hang out, food was too far away, the delicious croissants Lunch Rush made ran out as far as you could see. Pain. Just pure pain.
And disappointment. When you walked away with your food in a bag, maybe to sit under a tree and enjoy some peace and quiet, you saw her. Midori sitting at a table you did not expect. At the same table where Ashido Mina, Denki Kaminari, Kirishima Eijirou and Hanta Sero sat at. Good people. Honest, good people about to get bitten by a snake. If she was there, then Bakugou decided—
"You. Sit."
Thinking about the boy somehow summoned him behind you. Food in hand and bored expression on his face, he passed you not without giving you a stink eye. Indeed, disappointment.
You shrugged, trying not to pay much attention to the pang in your heart as you moved forward, but a voice— his voice stopped you in your tracks.
"You. Get the fuck out of my face." His growl made everyone around him turn to watch, you being one of them. There was no excuse to what came next, no way to run away past it and dissappear. He nodded his head at you out of all people and pointed at the seat still occupied by Midori; her purple eyes big, shocked, running between your frame and the blond's.
Do you know what it felt to be put in the spotlight without warning? Well, congratulations because that was your life now.
"Ba—Bakugou-san?" Her voice, now highed up and meek followed, then a small scream as Bakugou slammed his food on the table. His friends sat there, wide-eyed, but made no attempt to interrupt.
"Did I fucking stutter, bitch? Or want me to turn into a rabid dog for fucking real?"
You choked on your own spit, bag of goodies about to drop on the floor once you saw her horrified face. She knew that he knew. And when her pale eyes, filled with sudden malice, act dropped, turned to you it's when you realized she figured out where he found out from.
Not like you cared, really, but the little shit that always had to poke out every time she was in the same room as you decided to finally show up, making you wave and send her a wink.
"I said MOVE!" now— that growl, raspy and filled with anger startled her. The orange juice in her hands spilled all over her uniform and woke her up from whatever delusion she was in. With zero time to reconsider, every belonging of hers was picked up with trembling hands and she ran away to her group of cockroaches.
A smile was already settled on your face; your brain was storing that whole interaction deep within, ready to bring it back up whenever you needed a good laugh.
Life was pain and disappointment, you say? No. Life was great. Or more importantly, Bakugou was. Not like he needed to know. But he was a decent guy as he proved—
"THE FUCK YOU STANDING THERE LIKE A DUMBASS?! I SAID SIT!" —to be a pain in the fucking ass and the bane of your existence.
You gave him a face then turned to walk away, even rushing more when you heard his chair screeching on the floor. The exit was so close, so near, freedom never felt this great, the sunlight kissing your skin giving you a new hope to live. But not for long because he grabbed your hand and started dragging you towards his table.
Your hand was in his hand and he was dragging you—
Your hand— his big, warm, a little bit sweaty hand—
How could you ruin such a beautiful moment? Eyes on you two, shocked, silence, his adorable red ears being the only thing you could see as he was completely in front of you, still dragging you towards his friends...
"Did you wait all lunchbreak yesterday to talk to me?" You collided into him as you finished the sentence, his way taller form stiffened so much you felt you single-handedly broke Bakugou Katsuki for good.
But when he turned... Oh, when he turned. Biggest deer-caught-in-the-headlights eyes you've ever seen on anyone, cheeks painted so red you almost melted in the spot, lips trembling as his head worked a thousand miles per second just to find a retort. And you prepared yourself for—
"NO, I FUCKING DIDN'T! WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT, YOU FUCKING EXTRA? I'D NEVER WAIT FOR SOMEONE LIKE YO— ARE YOU EVEN LISTENING TO ME!" Mina's waving hand caught your attention and smiled at her. Your hand was still in his, gripped harshly as he still hasn't noticed it's still there.
"Hey! [L/N], long time no see!" She cheered, ignoring the living shit out of her screaming friend, like she's used to it.
"FUCKING LOOK AT ME WHEN I TALK TO YOU—"
"Hey, chill, dude. Now let go of my hand, I wanna talk to Ashido." You smiled sweetly, making extra effort to wave your linked hands arond until he finally noticed. He zapped his hand away so fast, like he's been bitten by a wild animal. Maybe even a rabid dog, if you will.
You couldn't ignore your own flustered state as you walked past him, giving him a one up, adding the absolute scandalized face he had into the back of your mind for safekeeping.
"Come sit with us!" The pinkette offered.
"Oh, hey, I know you! You're by Hatsume's workshop all the time!" Kirishima intervened with a surprised face that broke into a grin. "Nice to officially meet—"
"I fucking said." he appeared, sitting in front of you. "My name's Bakugou."
"Ok, dude, but I'm talking to someon—"
"BAKUGOU KATSUKI!" Could be heard from the stratosphere.
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Note: I just realized Midori means Green [ fucking duh ] but I'm not gonna change the name or her description. I think her parents fucking up her name was the start of many accidents leading into the Midori we all know and hate. Also, I know you understand. We all know a Midori in our lives. Much love.
Note 2: I keep editing it but tumblr dot com slash Install App on Phone fucks my editing and switches paragraphs all around! If you find any PLEASE tell me, I'd really appreciate it!!!
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mybrainproblems · 2 years
Text
I doubt this is going to gain any traction but it's highly likely that the CW choosing to hitch their star to Walker is what fucked them over and while what happened with Supernatural is really shitty, the schadenfreude is so good.
Wild speculation below; not 100% sure how coherent it is because it is A Lot.
Say you're the CW; you have old IP (cash cow that it is, it's aging and you want something fresh to maybe get your finances into the black) and decide that you're going to end it after a lengthy run and use it as a springboard for your new show. Because that new show is gonna star one of the actors from your older IP show and it's based off of a piece of nostalgia IP that is already owned by one of the joint owners of the CW (CBS owns W,TR). So there's no real acquiring any rights or paying for it, it's just sitting there ready to get a nostalgia reboot. You get the younger fans of spn and the older nostalgia fans. Instant hit, right?
Given that CW seems to be a poorly run shitshow I'm going to go out on a limb and say that their decision to go forward with Walker might have been partially based on the results of the destiel market research. This would be incredibly stupid because it's comparing apples to oranges but it sounds like they aren't the sharpest light bulbs in the drawer to begin with. I could see it happening pretty easily if the first discussions about a new show came close on the heels of the market research results.
So let's say you're the CW. You have spn creatives who want to have destiel greenlit. You (tbh sensibly) decide to do some market research knowing that you have very diverse AND divided audience demographics; you want to know how many viewers you might lose if you go forward with destiel. Results end up coming back that show it's likely going to impact your metrics poorly and so you kill the potential for canon destiel. At the same time, you're going to be looking for new shows (as you do).
We know the one fan's market research interview happened in Dec 2016, which means results of the research were likely presented to execs in early 2017. Walker was announced in late 2019. I would love to know when Walker was initially pitched and when it was decided that Jared would come onboard because that is heavily intertwined with the decision to cancel spn. (I don't believe Jared pitched Walker as a vehicle for himself, I think it must have already been on the network's radar given the nostalgia IP component. His interest might have reinvigorated the network's interest and pushed it in a certain direction.)
A new show is usually in development for 2 years from pitch to air, Walker was probably a bit less. The fact that CBS already owned the IP for the show would be a factor in that and since it was going to star Jared, it's probably why it was ordered direct to series without a pilot. He's already bankable and a proven draw, no need to hedge your bets. So while it's unlikely they made any solid decisions on Walker until 2018, they probably had the 2017 market research results in the back of their mind.
To go further out on the limb; if they have the results of the market research in the back of their mind as they're discussing a new show, maybe they decide to play it safe with a nostalgia reboot that then carries over a lead from spn who has a devoted following. They make sure the spn finale doesn't scare off the fan demographic they want to carry over to the new show and that it also definitively ends the old show. If they'd intended to have even an ambiguous destiel ending they would have been pushing a very different type of show as their follow-on. Since it takes years to go from pitch to air, this is a decision that was made before s15 was even being written.
And then they decided to give the queerbaiting one last hurrah. They use destiel to get eyes on the finale and therefore all the Walker promo marketing. But they also wildly underestimate how huge of a cultural impact Cas' confession is going to have. They have drastically miscalculated. They've now Icarused way too close to the queerbaiting sun and they have to double down on Walker... which gets crappy numbers and the CW continues to not turn a profit.
I actually don't think reciprocated destiel would have meant much for them in terms of a financial win (at best it would have been a net zero bc they'd have hemorrhaged one demographic while having to court a new one that they'd been tolerating but largely ignoring), but I do think hitching themselves to Walker was the final nail in the coffin. It's hilarious that going forward with Walker was such a risk averse decision that it ended up tanking spectacularly.
The hubris is truly delicious.
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sirthisisa-wendys · 3 years
Text
The Enforcers Part 8 (Geto Suguru x Fem!Reader)
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wc: 1.7k
tw: dark content (self-harm)
masterlist
a/n: By no means do I condone self-harm or want to glorify it in the light of this chapter. As a person who struggled with physical self-harm in her early teens, I know the destructive nature of this type of activity. However, as my characters are not perfect and complicated, I see this particular mode of action as something she would try to do in order to alleviate her pain and confusion. If you have questions or concerns, my inbox is always open to having a discussion about it.
If you so wish, you may skip this chapter altogether. There will be a recap on the next one if you choose to skip for your mental health. Take care of yourselves and see you soon. (ALSO, I know I promised smut but I gotta give y'all a raincheck this go-round. SORRY PLS DON'T KILL ME)
You're on your forty-seventh file of scandals, coverups, and secret dossiers that you finally feel it. The fabric of your identity begins to unravel right before your eyes.
Everything you've known is a lie.
The CSB has covered up so many things. So many lives lost. So many people forced to flee. So many families ripped apart--
An email makes its way over to the server, and you open it, the words across the screen coming from Suguru.
I know it's late, but send over Yu Haibara's files when you can.
You hit the reply button and begin to type out: "You mean the boy you killed?" but you stop yourself, deleting the words rapidly. Instead, you attach the files and send them over, not even bothering to look at them. You can't do it. Not another file could be stored away in the annals of your brain.
Nothing is as it seems anymore. The lies... they pile up in your mind, flooding the spaces where you used to hold what you thought was true, what you thought was real. Now, they're overflowing out of your brain and into your heart and soul, plaguing you like the nightmares that face you down night after night, more like demons that lurk in the corners of your mind than full file cabinets.
You always wake up in a tangle of sheets and sweat, one of your various enemies' faces hovering over you right before you stare down the barrel of a gun and --
You stumble out of the chair, eyes wet with tears, and go to the sink in the bathroom to wash your face. After you splash water on your skin, you look up at your reflection, anger rolling through you at the way you look. Weak.
You're fucking weak.
The voice in your head that usually told you that you were doing okay, that you had it all under control, is now turning on you, spitting nasty words that stick in between the synapses of your brain a muddy your rational thoughts.
The voices rise to a fever pitch, and you suddenly see red, the entirety of the world descending into blood-colored madness. The shattering of the glass mirror only becomes a reality when you're standing above the sink, chest heaving as your thoughts silence one by one, like shutting off lights in a house.
But only one stays behind as a shard of the mirror clinks into the sink.
Escape.
The light at the end of the tunnel.
You could get rid of the feelings here. You could get rid of the thoughts. You could escape. Why hadn't you thought about this before?
"Do it."
Your fingers grip the jagged shard of glass carefully, and before you can stop yourself, you drag it across the inside of your wrist, end to end, leaving behind a red line of blood that immediately blooms. Crimson dots drop into the sink, and you stare at the color, mesmerized by the way the blood runs down your arm and into the porcelain bowl. But there's no relief.
No sense of freedom.
Maybe you didn't do it hard enough?
Maybe you didn't--
The door to your room slams open, and you turn your head just as Suguru comes rushing into the bathroom. The shard of glass is still in your hand, as well as the blood running down your arm, and Suguru catches this immediately.
"Fuck," he breathes, and you turn to him, shard extended.
"Don't come any closer."
"Y/n," he calmly whispers. "You don't look so good."
"I wonder why that is," you reply, and Suguru stares back at you, hands raised in surrender.
"What're you doing?"
"What does it look like, Suguru?" you state in a trance. Your bullet wound begins to throb dully, but you ignore it, just like you're ignoring the blood dripping onto the tile flooring.
"Y/n, let's think about this."
"I don't want to think anymore!" The shrill scream is loud enough to make Suguru flinch, and you softly repeat, "I don't want to think anymore," over and over again as tears run down your face.
"I know," Suguru whispers. "I know. Will you let me help you?" You hiccup and drop the piece of glass to the floor, dissolving in a heap of tears and moans. You feel hands pulling you up from the floor and into strong arms, your head being cradled against a broad chest you've felt before. "Go ahead," Suguru encourages you. "Cry it out."
He carries you to another room in the building in silence, laying you on a firm bed and disappearing as you heave painful sobs into the sheets.
"Everything... hurts..." you gasp, and when Suguru reappears with a white bundle of cloth, a bandage roll, and some water, he nods.
"We're going to make it better, don't worry." He takes your injured arm and carefully wipes away the blood, examing the cut slowly. "Doesn't need stitches, thankfully." He turns to open the water bottle and hands it to you, silently telling you to drink while he bandages your wrist.
You drink the water greedily then lean back on the headboard, eyes closing down as Suguru works diligently on your wound. And then you remember the first time he did this for you and the mistake you made in your pridefulness.
"Thank you," you murmur, and Suguru looks up at your face, finally seeing some form of clarity cross your tear-streaked cheeks.
"You're welcome," he replies tenderly. "I have to keep you safe, remember? I promised you that I would." You don't answer him, but he finishes at that exact moment anyways, standing and placing the remnants of the bandage roll on the nightstand. The wound is now covered up completely, with no sign of blood seeping through the cotton and staining the white cloth dark red.
You watch as Suguru crawls into the bed beside you, sighing deeply as he runs his fingers through his locks. "Should I stay awake with you or do you want to try to sleep?"
"Sleep," you answer - albeit not confidently - and the black-eyed man obliges, pulling the thin sheet over you.
"I'll be right here," he affirms, but you reach out your uninjured arm and touch his hand. He instantly turns his palm up to let you grab his fingers, and you pull him closer to you in the king-sized bed.
"Hold me." A second passes with no movement, and Suguru whispers,
"Are you sure?" You nod, and he wordlessly scoots closer, wrapping an arm around you as you nestle into his side with your bandaged hand resting on his chest. His fingers rub a soft pattern up and down your skin, soothing you to the brink of sleep. "I've got you. We'll deal with everything else in the morning," Suguru murmurs as you slip off into a dreamless - and nightmare-less - sleep.
_____________________________________________________________
Morning comes and goes.
Midday arrives, and you awaken from your terrorless sleep still encased in Suguru's grasp. Your eyes flick up to his face, which is peaceful in the midday light streaming in from the windows. The Leader of the Fallen Sun District is asleep and dead to the world around him, but the sound of his breathing lets you know he's on the brink of waking up.
Part of you doesn't want him to. You want to lay there without any responsibilities to him, without any concern, or further harm to either one of you. Maybe if you continued to sleep, all of this would become a distant memory. All of this would go away, and you could go back to living in ignorance.
But Suguru's stirring makes you stiffen, and you feel his arms tighten around you before sliding away.
"You're awake."
"Yeah," you whisper, and he sits up, pulling his knees to his chest.
"We need to talk about last night." You sit up as well, staring at the edge of the bed blankly. "Why didn't you tell someone about your declining mental health?"
"I didn't realize it until it was too late," you admit, looking at the bandage on your wrist. "But I won't be doing that again."
"Doesn't matter," Suguru interjects, looking over at you. You choose to avoid his gaze and stare at your feet, inhaling deeply. "I have to have someone watch you now. I want you to be safe, and now I'm not sure if I can ensure that without some oversight on my part."
"No," you exhale quickly, looking over at him in fear. "I'm better now, I promise."
"I'll have someone move a few of your things over here. That way I can keep an eye on you, just in case." Suguru continues, standing from his position on the bed. "I won't bother you. But I made a promise to you, and I'm going to keep it at all costs." He turns back to you, stating, "Today we'll take a day off and go into the town. I've been wanting to show you around for a while anyway."
You conclude the argument is over when he places a kiss on your temple, then walks into his bathroom, shutting the door and leaving you on the bed alone.
_____________________________________________________________
A car picks both of you up from the building, and when you slide into the backseat, Suguru points to the expanse in the distance.
"Take us to the marketplace." The driver nods, scars running up and down his pale face and his blue eyes looking up at you in the rearview mirror. Does this man even know that he's sitting next to the leader of the Fallen Sun district? Or is Kenjaku a faceless man, hiding behind walls of ones and zeroes?
The scenes that pass by you look identical to those of the city you know and love. There are children playing on the sidewalks, people carrying groceries, life carrying on as if the majority of their names aren't on some rejected list of people who defected from their previous society. Suguru notices your awe at the way things are, and looks over at you, smiling brightly.
"You'd be surprised what you can build from ashes, y/n."
_____________________________________________________________
TAGLIST: @missbonekitty @wack0-genius @thankuary @jsqeeut @r-i-m-f-009 @sunfloweroranges @leanne-tamashi @girlruby23 @rein-icu @brownskinnedgirll @chanelmalandro @savantsoulfinder @jibe-gajima @chilledlucifer @amnxsia @kontentious @fuyuko26 @everybodylovescayrayray @flare-on @sammytamaki @meena-in-a-nutshell @falling-through-pages @naoyasdarling
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frogtanii · 3 years
Note
hi! noah anon here again, um ahaha, i may have been inspired to write a part 2 to my previous atsumu hurt/comfort drabble, i hope that's okay! ive been living for protective!y/n ever since they fought meiko for suga, so i wanted to sort of portray that!
-
from the way atsumu's breathing had evened out, you assumed he'd finally fallen asleep. exhaustion from the rough night he had taking over as he laid in your bed, wrapped up in your comforting embrace. atsumu's forehead rested in the crook of your neck and his nose pressed up against your collarbone, soft breaths tickling the sensitive skin. his arm laid across your stomach, keeping you close. for the first time since he walked into your room that night, he looked peaceful.
you on the other hand, were pissed; still stewing with rage over the events of the night. the main target of your aggression being none other than miya osamu himself. how could someone be so cold to their own twin?
the more you thought about it, the more restless you got, a pit of frustration growing and twisting uncomfortably in your gut. laying still was starting to prove a difficult task. with all of this frustrated energy you just needed to move — do something, before you went insane. so as carefully as you could, you slipped out from under atsumu, gently pushing a pillow under him for support.
shutting your door as quietly as possible you padded your way into the kitchen to grab a glass of water and an aspirin for atsumu. he'd probably need it for when he woke up, and it was the perfect excuse to get up and move around. however, as you neared the kitchen, you noticed a figure searching through the snack cabinets, grey hairs poking out into your field of vision. of course now of all times you'd run into the object of your current frustration. did you universe hate you or something?
just ignore him, you thought to yourself, no sense in getting into a conflict tonight.
as quietly as possible, you pulled a glass cup from the cabinet and filled it up with water. you had asprin in your room, so there was no need to grab any from the common area. your next objective was to exit the kitchen as quick as possible before your urge to punch osamu in the face increased any more. at this moment, his mere presence was enough to up your anger levels.
however, the second you spun on your heels to leave, osamu was also making his way out of the kitchen, causing the two of you to almost collide. luckily osamu reacted quickly, stepping back and preventing anything from being spilt.
"fucking watch it!" he spit out, expression twisting into one of contempt.
you scoffed at his outburst, ready to hit him with a few choice words, but by the time your lips parted he was already storming out of the kitchen and into the living room. a high pitched voice could be heard when he entered, sending another wave of fury coursing through your veins. "thank you 'samu, you're the best!"
"of course baby," osamu responded, "now let's start our movie."
the noise of some cheesy romance movie soon filled the living room and all surrounding areas, way too loud for this late of an hour in your opinion. it only added to your irritation, and without even thinking you were marching yourself to the living room with conviction, glass of water left behind on the kitchen island.
usually you never sought out trouble, and you weren't too fond of confrontation when it could be avoided. in the beginning of your time in the hyper house, maybe, but as time passed you soon learned nothing you said would change anything. so to save some sanity you resorted to short quips and just plain ignoring your housemates, once your contract was up none of it mattered anymore anyway. but after holding atsumu for an hour while he sobbed, and osamu's entitled attitude, something in you snapped. fuck being the bigger person.
so with your shoulders back and head held high you stormed into the living room, snatching the remote from coffee table to pause the movie playing.
that certainly grabbed their attention.
"the fuck is yer problem?" osamu vetted, standing to square up to you, fists clenched at his side and jaw tense. meiko followed suit, but took her position slightly behind osamu, nimble fingers gripping his bicep.
"my problem? hmm let's see, maybe my problem is the fact that i just held your brother as he cried himself to sleep while you were out here cuddled up on the couch!"
meiko snickered from behind him, and you had to stop yourself from lunging at her. how dare she laugh at his pain?
"'tsumu's fine, he'll get over it. now leave so we can watch our movie." your eyes went wide at osamu's response. did he really not care?
"he's your brother, and you hurt him." the annoyed expression on osamu's face fell slightly at your statement, but he quickly recovered, expression morphing into one that could kill.  "don't act so innocent, you were probably in there twisting his mind with your little lies. you know everything that's happened between us has been your fault? you're the one that turned him against me!" his voice was gradually increasing him volume and malice, you obviously getting under his skin.
"oh please, you're still telling yourself that?" you inched closer to the pair, chin lifting up to meet osamu's steely glare, your attempt at intimidation working only on the small woman behind him.
"'samu, shes scaring me, please make her leave," meiko whimpered. Osamu placed a protective arm around her, pulling her into his side, "don't worry baby, i won't let her near you." you rolled your eyes at meiko, her feigned fear sending your patience over the edge.
"oh shut up, meiko," you snapped, causing her to coward further into osamu.  "hey, don't talk to her like that!" he shot back at you, eyes darkening as he towered over your form, but you refused to back down.
"i'm texting iwaizumi, he can make her leave." meiko began typing furiously on her phone.
you chose to ignore her, prioritizing getting in your final words before iwaizumi could come to their resuce. "you've got your head completely up your ass if you think anyone but yourself is to blame for your broken relationship with 'tsumu!"
"you have no right to—"
"what the hell is going on here?" iwaizumi stormed into the room, large arms crossed over his chest as he placed himself between you and your victims.
"iwa, thank god! me and 'samu were trying to watch a movie when y/n just came in here and started attacking us! it was so scary, please make her leave!"
you scoffed at meiko's fabricated story, but before you could even begin to defend yourself iwa spoke, "y/n, go back to your room before im forced to take action." despite his dagger sharp gaze, you refused to shrink. you were going to get your point in regardless of any threats iwaizumi threw your way. so shooting him a quick and dismissive glare, you turned your attention back to osamu and meiko to get in one final blow.
"look, i don't know what your problem with me is, and frankly i don't care. but leave atsumu the fuck out your sick little games." the venom in your voice was enough to strike real fear into meiko, who was now completely hiding behind osamu for protection. even osamu's intimidating demeanor faltered at your protectiveness over his brother.
iwaizumi was the first to break the tension, "y/n, go—"
"yeah yeah, i got it, im leaving." your cut him short, giving osamu one last glare before exiting the living room, stopping to grab the glass of water from the kitchen before heading back to your room.
in your frustration you'd completely forgotten atsumu was asleep, accidentally shutting your door back with a little too much force. "angel?" atsumu's sleep drenched voice pulled you from your stewing thoughts, and you felt any and all anger melt away when you locked eyes with him.
"where'd you go off to?" he asked, rubbing at his eyes and sitting up. you snatched a bottle of asprin from your night stand and extended it to him along with the glass of water, "figured you'd want this when you woke up."
the corner of his mouth lifted up into a lopsided smile as he accepted your offer, downing a pill and half the water in one go, "yer too good to me, angel."
you offered up a soft smile as you took the glass and pill bottle back from him and set them on your nightstand. you took a seat on your bed next to atsumu, pushing back his disheveled hair back with one hand, prompting him to let out a content hum.
"i'm sorry for waking you," you whispered, letting your hand trail down the side of his face before coming to rest against his jaw, "how are you feeling?"
atsumu leaned into your touch, "much better, thanks to you. but, can we lay down again?"
you nodded, falling back to a laying position with atsumu following suit. however, this time he pulled you into his chest, holding you in his arms. you sunk further into him, finding it much easier to sleep this time as his warmth surrounded you and calmed your nerves.
-
i got a little carried away and this ended up a little longer than i intended, oops, oh well! i hope you like it!
— noah anon
hhhh,,, BESTIE OMFG UR SO SO SO TALENTED WTF???? do u have a blog cs if so sharty drop the @ ahaha (jk only if u feel comfy!!) i just mean WOW WOW WOW WOWIE
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butteraway · 3 years
Text
when time runs out | ii
⋆ summary:  A young girl has fallen deeply ill with an unknown disease in her, so with all her free time spent in an empty hospital room, she spends it online playing video games. That's until she meets her cousins friends, one spiking her interest with his extremely vulgare language.
pairing: bakugou katsuki x reader
word count: 2.1k
warnings: small mentions of suicide (I’ll put a star ‘⋆’ on top and below the paragraph so you can skip over it if your uncomfortable, you won’t miss anything too important so dont worry!)
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"Bro, honestly I still can't believe that you of all people made it into the elite, number one hero school in the country."
"Waahh, I'm telling you! I'm the real deal Y/N!"
"So, how's your summer been? School's gonna be starting soon, are you excited?" Denki could only smile and sigh as his character was finally killed off.
Said girl chuckled as she heard Denki's voice rise through her headphones as they continued killing zombies in front of them. She grimaced as a zombie attacked her from behind her character. Geez, I never get a break in this game.
"Well, to be honest, nothing big really happened besides me getting my acceptance letter from U.A. Just me training and hanging with the fam." He laid back in the comfort of his bed, headphones still on in order to hear his cousin.
"Aah, already training, hero boy? That's why you haven't been visiting me lately." Y/N pouted and crossed her arms as her TV screen turned black, returning her to the main page of the game.
"Man, we suck at this game!" Denki laughed out loud as he saw how long they lasted in the last round. Y/N smiled and let out a small giggle of her own as she placed down her controller.
"Yeah, how long have we had this game for? It still feels like it's our first time playing this." Denki cracked a smile, even though Y/N couldn't see him.
"Hey, sorry for not being able to come to the hospital. Getting ready for U.A. is no joke, haha." Denki rubbed the nape of his neck, eyebrows scrunching up with regret. 
"Nah nah, it's fine! I understand that you have things to do. You have big plans for the future." Y/N brushed a strand of her hair away from her face, looking down at the needles that were plunged into her arms. Her eyes were clouded with an emotion she often felt when talking with Denki. She always felt guilty whenever the feeling came around.
"Must be nice to be able to achieve your dreams." Jealousy. She hated the feeling she got every now and then, but you couldn't really blame her. She lost everything in only a couple of months. Silence passed between the two teenagers, Y/N finally realizing what she said.
"Uh s-sorry about that! I didn't mean to say that alou-" Y/N was cut off by Denki's soft voice.
"Y/N, it's... okay to feel like that. I don't understand what you have been going through, but I know that you shouldn't bring yourself down for something you can't control. You're such an amazing person and to be honest. . ." Denki paused as Y/N's eyes began to glaze over.
"I'm doing this for me and you. You always encouraged me to take any opportunity by, as you like to say, the neck. I-I wanna make you proud, y'know? I wanna make it feel like you're a part of this crazy world, even if you're not really here, walking with me through it all."
Y/N’s lips wobbled as she let out a watery laugh. She hunched over, small tears falling down her face. To someone else, this would've boosted their ego, but to Y/N, those words meant the world to her. No one had ever said that to her before. She felt like she had a purpose in this wretched life of hers. She sniffles were heard by Denki
"H-hey! It's okay, p-please don't cry!" Y/N heard shuffling coming from Denki as he reassured her to not cry.
"I mean it. I only wish you could be there though, it would be so much cooler!" Denki smiled, trying to lighten up the mood. Y/N's sniffles slowly quieted down as she let out a soft laugh that made his heart swell with joy. At least he can make her laugh.
"I'm s-sorry, but no one has ever told me t-that." Small hiccups came from the girl as she calmed down, taking deep breaths to slow her heart rate. Won't want doctors to come rushing in just to see her crying over something so small.
"I-I'm just really happy you said that." Denki's heart clenched at those words, his chin trembling every now and then. He knew that Y/N wasn't happy with where she was. She had even admitted that she had urges to rip out the needles and slowly lose her life from there. Denki spent the rest of that night talking to her after. To say he was concerned was an understatement. He was terrified when she told him.
"I think us being able to play games together is already enough!" They both laughed and talked for a couple of minutes before deciding to to hang up. 
"Y/N, I mean it when I say I want you to be happy, okay? I hope you feel better tomorrow. Buh-bye!" Y/N said her goodbye to Denki, hanging up and closing the laptop that sat on a movable table. 
Her smile slowly left her face, leaving her staring blankly at the pure white wall and mirror in front of her. When visitors were gone, her window would turn to a mirror so no one would disturb her. Y/N took a good look at herself and only sighed. Despite being as healthy as she could get, she looked a bit on the thin side, this complimenting her skin. Running a hand through her hair, she untangled the little knots that had formed there.
"Geez, what happened to you girl? You look like a zombie." Y/N looked at the zombie game and cringed.
"Literally."  Just then the door to her room opened and shut quickly, the air filter turning on when a female doctor entered. Y/N watched her carefully as she checked the IV that connected to her arm. The protective suit never made Y/N feel better about her condition.
"Are you alright, Ms. L/N?" The light, stern voice rang through her ears as she looked at the woman in front of her. Y/N gave the doctor a grin.
"Never been better."
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It had been an hour since the doctors had turned the lights off, but Y/N didn't feel the slightest bit of exhaustion. She had been sitting in the pitch black room for the time being and was really debating on turning on the TV.
"Ahh, fudge it." Instinctively reaching out for the remote, she turned on the TV and winced as the bright light hit her.
Looking back to the screen, she chose the option of going online and waited for other players to join. While waiting, a new character popped up next to her and she could only smirk at their username. Tapping on her mic, she decided to make conversation with them to see if they also had a mic.
"Now, what to play. What to play..." Y/N had settled for playing OverWatch since she didn't feel like playing any story type games. No cliffhangers tonight, Y/N thought. As the game loaded, she laid back and began thinking about cheesecake. When was the last I ate strawberry cheesecake? Great, now I want some. Thinking about eating cheesecake made her excited about the next day.
"Well hello, dear ol' '​​​​​King Explosion Murder_1.' Nice name you got there." Y/N chuckled as she said the name out loud, seeing another player enter.
"Hello 'Tape Dispenser?' What's with the wack name?" The girl’s eyes crinkled as she smiled at their name, hearing the user chuckle through her headphones. '​​​​​​King Explosion Murder' still had yet to reply, but that didn't bother her. They're either using the bathroom or don't have a mic. 
"The name was inspired by my quirk. But what's up with '_DeathGirl_', huh? You good?"  Y/N could only laugh at what he said. She should really send him a friend request.
"I’m honestly great, a little tired, but great! I just gotta make up a name, y'know? But your quirk has to do with tape? I don't know if that's wicked or useless." The boy laughed while Y/N laughed as well, losing her grip on her controller. That was until a gruff voice interrupted their laughing session.
"Shut the fuck up, your annoying ass voices are giving me a damn headache." Finally, after being silent, 'King Explosion Murder_1' spoke up.
"Aah, so you do talk. I don't know why you didn't say anything sooner Mr. Explosion Murder." The other player could only sneer at what she said, hitting his desk with his fist. Another player had joined, Y/N only noticing.
"Ah, hello 'Sleep Deprived Controller!'" Said player made their character wave, making Y/N chuckle. While they had their interaction, 'King Explosion Murder' was shouting at her, now realizing that she wasn't paying attention to what he was saying.
"Hey! Listen to me when I'm fucking talking to you, emo bitch!" Y/N’s eyes widened, soon rolling her eyes, watching the game load as they were placed into a match. What's his damn problem?
"Hey man, no need to go calling people names now." 'Tape Dispenser' nervously chuckled as he heard the other player growl. Y/N sported a shocked face as she heard this. What is he, a dog??? 
"Outta this conversation, extra!" Tape dude could only deadpan at what he was just called. Who calls people extras?? I’m not an extra, in fact I think I’m- 'Sleep Deprived Controller' listened with an annoyed expression on their face, wishing they could shut their shouting teammate up. Damn, wish I actually had a mic.
The game began as all the players separated, going their own way to kill their enemies. Everyone was in the zone, getting items and yelping every now and then if they were attacked. The first to go down was 'Tape Dispenser', then 'Sleep Deprived Controller', leaving both Y/N and 'King Explosion Murder' left on their team. Y/N smirked at their winning team, only one player was left on the other team. Just as the game was going to end, the opposing player shot down 'Explosion Murder', killing him.
"FUUUUUUUUUUUUU-" His mic cut off, causing the two players with mics in a cackling mess. Y/N calmed down, remembering she was still playing, trying to hunt down the last player. Finally, after many curses by a certain player and cheering from another, she located her enemy. 
"You better fucking win this or I'll kill you." Knowing he didn't mean that last part, she only focused on the first part. You better win this. Those words echoed through her head as she stopped aiming for the player. She hated being told what to do.
"Ah, so you're one of those people." Not knowing what she meant, they only watched with wide eyes at what she did. Y/N jumped down next to the enemy, shooting them twice with her weakest gun, signaling them that she was there. Quickly, the other player shot her character down, killing her. They lost the game.
"THE FUCK WAS THAT FOR?! WE COULD'VE FUCKING WON!" Explosion Murder wasn't taking defeat easily like the other two were. Y/N could only give a grunt of disapproval towards the loud player.
"Ha, why did you just give up right there? You could've easily killed him." Tape Dispenser was just as confused as the other two players, slightly disappointed at the loss. Y/N sighed as she rubbed her forehead.
"Sorry not sorry, but this dude really thought he could get away with telling me what to do. I'll make my move when I'm ready, sorry to disappoint you guys." She sighed as she rubbed her neck, ready to hear the disapprovals of her teammate. But what she heard and saw made her smile.
"Nah, it's fine. It can get a tiny bit annoying with Murder yelling in your ear." Tape Dispenser reassured her, with Sleep Deprived's character giving her a thumbs up. Though, the annoyed sigh caught her attention back to him. Her eyebrow twitched. What is it now?
"I'm done with this fucking sappy shit scene. I'm out." Those were Murder's last words before he disconnected, leaving them in an awkward silence before Y/N stifled a giggle.
"I have a feeling that won't be the last time I'm seeing him." Tape Dispenser chuckled while Sleep Deprived's character shook their head, making Y/N softly laugh. After sending friend requests to both people, she bid them both fair well and left.
Y/N turned off her console and tv, putting the controllers on the table near her. She laid down in the comfort of her bed, thinking about her interactions with the people she met. She smiled, closing her eyes and drifting into a dreamless slumber with only one thought in mind. 
King Explosion Murder is such a weird name.
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