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moonlight-prose · 5 months

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EVERGREEN WASN'T SUCH A BAD DREAM

➝ A HURT DRABBLE

a/n: this first started out as a small idea jotted down in my notebook way back in august. i was trying to write hurt and it was being put on hold cause honestly i was scared to continue it. i didn't think i'd ever write it and honestly it didn't make much sense to me given the way the fic played out. but i couldn't get over the idea that these two got a little bit of joy in their lives. it's pre-chapter six so i hope y'all enjoy! divider by the incredibly talented @saradika.

summary: in the middle of destruction nature continues to follow the same path as before. starting with the first snowfall of the season. you just happen to be there to witness it with him.

word count: 1.5k+

pairing: joel miller x f!reader

warnings: not explicit, soft joel, cold weather antics, fluff, a tad bit of romance, angst, grief, talk of the future in a hopeless world.

SERIES MASTERLIST

A blanket of white covered the world, turning everything brighter. The sun reflected off the snow, practically sparkling. You heard the crunch beneath your boots—the sound familiar and inviting. It called to the small fractured piece of joy that still remained in your body; begged you to finally let go and have some fun. Even as the world went to shit, the first snowfall never failed to make you smile.

Your breath collected in the air in front of you. Showing you just how cold it really was. Which only made you smile more—your nose practically numb with the frigid air.

“Fuck,” he muttered, slipping on the heavy gloves that he found in an old shop a few towns back. “It’s too cold.”

You shrugged, taking in a deep breath that burned on its way in. ‘Yeah but…it snowed.”

His eyes narrowed at your overjoyous smile. “It’s a pain in the ass to travel through snow.”

That was true.

Yet you couldn’t find it in yourself to be upset about such a beautiful thing. Snow has always been attuned to joy in your life. The start of fun spent outdoors with your brother. Hot drinks with friends as your university began to set up for the worst. And sure there were the annoyances and hardships that came with this weather. But you had always found that the positives far outweighed the negatives in this case.

Joel couldn’t necessarily say the same. A bitter feeling of grief began to build in his chest—Sarah’s face entering his mind. They spent holidays in the snow. Holed up in the house as they watched a movie—usually a Christmas movie with a predictable script—often inviting Tommy for the night. It was a time he’d give anything to return to.

The weight in his chest pressed down painfully—attempting to drag him down. Back into the darkness he was so used to residing in.

Except something bright broke through its walls. As if sunlight was once again shedding its light over him. Warmth consumed him; offering him hope with a soft press to the agony that splintered him half. Only when he tore himself out his mind did he realize what it was.

The sound of your laughter.

Small flakes began to fall from the sky, catching on his hair and jacket. They stung his face slightly. He couldn’t focus on that though. Not when you were smiling, your bare hands trying to catch each snowflake—your tongue sticking out. For the first time he saw a childlike wonder in your eyes. The cloud of grief he’d grown so accustomed to—now dissipated as you played in the snow.

“Havin’ fun?” he asked as his lips pulled up at one side.

You laughed again and Joel felt a bolt of lightning go through his heart. Even though it was freezing outside, that warmth spilled into his chest, spreading out to the tips of his fingers. He understood what love felt like. How it affected a person, but this…this was more. This was the missing emotion he thought he’d never see again in this lifetime.

“As a matter of fact—I am having fun.”

You stepped closer to him, letting your freezing nose press against the hollow of his throat. He jolted, eliciting another small giggle from your lips. But he refused to move. Simply shifting slightly to open his jacket in order to pull you closer until his body heat seeped into yours. He wrapped his arms around you, tugging you until your feet were pressed between his.

“Gonna get sick,” he muttered under his breath.

A puff of cold breath left you, caressing against his skin and sending a shiver down his spine. “C’mon Joel, it’s fun.”

“Boston—”

“Don’t you remember fun?”

He stiffened, hands frozen on your back. Only this time you didn’t immediately apologize for possibly saying the wrong thing. You remained silent. Gave him a chance to process the pain that was no doubt overtaking his body, a grief you would never be able to understand. Each of you carried your own demons—dragged down by the weight of them daily, and only for a brief moment did you see him allow them to lift.

“I do,” he replied, his voice thick with torment.

You shut your eyes, ran your hands up his back and let out a breath. “Tell me about it.”

Tell me about your past. Tell me about her.

Joel rarely mentioned anything when it came to his past. That continued to be a locked door you held no key to and you accepted that. You took what you could with him. But standing there in the middle of a snowy serene winter, you finally wanted to see each broken part he hid from you. You wanted to watch the sunlight glint off them like glass and catch their beauty in the palm of your hands.

You wanted to know him.

“We’d celebrate Christmas,” he said softly, lips pressed to your hair. “Nothin’ fancy. Nothin’ big. But we’d get a tree.”

He never told you who Sarah was to him, never revealed what happened to her. You were just happy to finally hear about something joyous in his life. That once upon a time…he might have smiled. Hell he might have even laughed often. You could tell by the lines around his eyes, proof that this man had experienced more than just this.

“In Texas?” you pressed, face peeking up to see his gaze already on you.

He nodded. “My brother usually joined us.”

Surprise lingered in your body, but you pushed past it. “You never told me you had a brother.”

And there it was, that small hint of a smile showing through the heartbreak on his face. “Yeah…Tommy.”

You tried to conjure up a picture of the other Miller. Did he have brown eyes like Joel? Was he older or younger? Was he still alive? Something told you with the way Joel reacted simply by saying the man’s name, that he remained okay. That somewhere on this Earth he was alive. You wanted to ask more, see if he’d let you in on a life you were never meant to be a part of. But pressing Joel to do anything—especially talking about his past—was not something that would go over easily.

“Did you play in the snow?” you asked, a smirk pulled at your lips.

He sighed, glancing up at the sky, a soft red stain flushing across his face. “We did.”

“I knew it.”

“Shut up,” he mumbled, fingers pinching at your hip. Only to feel his heart flutter at the echo of your laugh being pressed to his chest.

He swore his heart responded to the sound, twisting in a way that he didn’t know was possible. It wasn’t wracked with pain, it wasn't threatening to drown him beneath his grief. It simply just existed.

Perhaps that’s what he could do for this one moment.

Stand in the snow as a man, holding a woman he loved, and exist.

“Hey Texas.”

He ran a soothing hand up your back, fingers lightly tracing the hem of your jacket. “Hm?”

“Will you play in the snow with me?”

Something lit up his eyes, the brown suddenly a lighter gold that struck a chord in your heart. He played you like a fucking guitar and with that one look, you’d let him. Joel took a breath, mouth parting, and did the one thing you longed to see. He smiled. Nothing small or minor, but a full blown smile that made your heartbeat cease to exist. For the first time…he looked happy. As if the man from before had shoved his way forward to finally give you a proper look at who he once was.

At the man he longed to be again.

“Yeah Boston,” he said, leaning forward to brush his lips against yours. “I will.”

A laugh escaped your mouth when he shoved you back lightly, hands reaching for the freshly fallen snow on the ground. You did the same. Digging your fingers into the freezing icy ground, pulling up a small amount to make a ball. Only for Joel to throw one at you, hitting you square in the shoulder.

“I wasn’t ready!”

He chuckled, heading for you. “Move faster.”

“Ironic you’re telling me that.” He stuttered, eyes flashing dark at the memory of having you the day before, but that faded with another grin. One that taunted you with something more.

A promise of a life that could be.

His arm wrapped around your waist, the snow falling from your hands as he hauled you backwards. A yelp escaped your mouth when he fell, your body landing on top of his—snow sticking to his hair and yours. The sun still burned bright in the sky, flakes continued to rain down around you, but for this one single moment…you existed in a space that felt good.

That felt normal.

“We’ll have a tree,” you said softly, rolling over to lay beside him.

He turned to look at you, eyes tender. “A tree huh?”

You nodded. “One day.”

“Okay,” he murmured, hand cupping your cheek. “We’ll have a tree.”

#joel miller x f!reader #joel miller x reader #joel miller x you #joel miller x y/n #joel miller #joel miller fic #the last of us fic #my writing

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lavenoon · 9 months

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Kindled Spirits AU

Soulmate AU revamped with a Y/N <3

Basics: Soulmate bonds are 1) not necessarily romantic, 2) not a given and not always between just 2 people, 3) not necessarily reciprocal (rare, but happens) Basically soulmates are bonded via dreams - meeting within dreams, or dreaming of each other’s memories, anything in dreams is fair game Plays a year after the pizzaplex fire and given that I had the idea a good while ago none of the dlc is included in the premise, also bc this is based on an old self insert fic Y/N is extremely audhd because that I refuse to take out

Y/N has spent most of their life assuming they don’t have a soulmate, which is a relief because they’re plagued by nightmares/ stress dreams a lot. They got used to those, and when some other hazy dreams crop up later in life they don’t think much of it.

Then one night they dream of burning. An indoor playground, they stand in the middle of it, filled with hopelessness and self hatred they cant explain (the irony of Sun burning to death). They don’t feel alone though, and though they can’t see anyone else, they know someone else is there. It's both a comfort as well as agonizing, and the care for that other person is evident, despite the whole emotional cocktail. They go through the entire dream incapable of changing anything, and then wake up still feeling hot but also cold and clammy, phantom flames still licking at their skin. All while they cope with the idea that maybe they did have a soulmate, and that is now past tense.

For an entire year they go around thinking they witnessed their soulmate(s?) burning to death via dream, not telling anyone about it but carrying that guilt.

They move, and find a new job - the Pizzaplex is hiring! No one wants to be a security guard anymore after all that weird shit a year ago, so even though Y/N lacks the qualifications, they get hired. Rotating shifts, day (morning/ afternoon) and night. The first time they walk past the daycare, it flashes into flame - but no, that’s just coincidence. It’s the first indoor playground they’ve seen since then, it’s hazy dream memories worsened by guilt, it’s not the same.

Y/N befriends the daycare attendant, and the naptime attendant - they talk to Sun sometimes through the slide, and Moon usually bothers them on their security rounds. They do meet Sun first, after trying to be helpful throwing down some stray ballpit balls down the slide, and a curious Sun crawls up just to get a ball to the face. Y/N feels very bad about that, and given their lack of scripts for how to interact with animatronics, they just fall back on the scripts they already have. Sun doesn't seem to mind, so it's all good! Then one night they shout a belated "Good night!" down the slide, after the lights in the daycare have turned off, and barely avoid falling when suddenly Moon stands behind them, asking them just what they're doing. He makes his dislike of their flashlight promptly known, and then they have a menace of a shadow for their rounds.

That goes on for a couple weeks, until Sun asks them inside of the daycare to address a few concerns they could please relay to management?

And then the perspective is just undeniable. Y/N gets caught in the flashback, seeing it all burn again, and Sun startles them out of it. They don’t tell him. They can’t. But they realize that he’s been forced to work in a direct replica of the place where he burned to (temporary) death.

After that they keep trying to broach the topic of soulmates in general, but Sun and Moon are very much convinced that as animatronics they are not people, and they can’t dream anyway, so how would they have a soulmate? So silly!

Dreams and personhood are very connected in this AU - with dreams linking souls society just assumes that anyone without dreams is not a person. (Is this a societal issue for other humans who don't dream? Sure! People are people and will exclude others for any reason!)

Meanwhile Y/N starts having more dreams - they assume because now they live closer, actually met their soulmates, there’s less of a barrier to only have the super traumatic stuff make it into their dreams. In fact, they are kind of relieved that their usual nightmares are exchanged for extremely mundane “watching kids play in the daycare” or watching themself being bothered by Moon from his POV.

It’s a struggle trying to convince their soulmates that they are in fact people, while wondering if the bond is reciprocated because how would they tell? Sun and Moon can’t dream, there’s no confirmation that Y/N is their soulmate too! Lots of fear of rejection that’s holding them back here

But also some shenanigans at this time, like Y/N knowing that Moon follows them on their routes, and calling him out on it when he tries to stay hidden. He asks how they knew, and they bluntly reply “it came to me in a dream”. Moon laughs, then asks for the truth that they don’t know how to give after he rejects it so easily. They end up deflecting and he goes back to being a menace.

Also Y/N being somewhat anxious once they realize that Sun uses "friend" for many people (whenever they do see him interact with adults, which isn't often) and awkwardly ask for confirmation because oh no what if he's just being polite and they read too much into it? They almost regret it when he proves that Moon isn't the only menace and makes sure they know he considers them their friend after! Moon continues being a cat in his affections, so when Y/N asks him the same he ends up positively surprised, somewhat guilty (due to the secrets he keeps, and the danger he still believes he poses), but mostly ramps up the friendly annoying to the max

And then Y/N ends up impulsively telling Moon. He wants them to be joking - asks them to, even, to take it all back. When they refuse he reacts more in anger and accuses them of deluding themself, suggesting they need medical attention. They get angry then, too, because is he really telling them to go to a doctor after they confess something like this? It ends badly, with Y/N fleeing the scene and then avoiding both Moon and Sun for a good while.

Until Sun requests their presence about a “security issue” in the closed daycare, and Y/N goes even knowing he’ll want to talk. He’s concerned more than angry, but disbelieving all the same. Y/N’s patience is running thin when Sun, desperately, asks them just what they were dreaming about to be so convinced - what made them think they're linked to an animatronic like that? - so they tell him about the fire. They also tell him that they were telling the truth that one time with Moon. Sun (and Moon) get their own flashback, and Y/N ends up frantic, apologizing for bringing it up like that, while the boys are just terrified that

1) Y/N had to see that, experience it via dream

and 2) just what else could they have seen?

Moon in particular is terrified - he approaches them a bit later, asking about other dreams they might’ve had. Even says “they would have been nightmares”. He assumes that Y/N must have witnessed the virus induced murders and has no idea how to assure them that he’s not that, after he reacted in so much anger at their initial confession. His concern doesn’t really lessen, and more shifts upon being told that “I wouldn’t know, all my dreams are nightmares anyway”.

Mostly themed around growing closer after that, and working around “we don’t need to dream of you to know we like you, and we do!” as well as uncovering the past trauma Sun and Moon have gone through (and are going through, still trapped in the same building in a replica of where they burned).

Also Sun and Moon struggling to accept their personhood because if they’re people, then they are traumatized and were (and are being) mistreated for a long time, and that’s also hard to come to terms with. Some thoughts towards animatronic emancipation though I never got that far in the fic, so mostly comfort and slice of life as they work around the little bump in the road of their soulmate bond. Y/N opening up about their own dreams, and why it's so difficult to say they had any nightmares based on Sun and Moon's experience before the literal death experience not just breaking the ice but rather melting it at record speed

Would remain platonic/ ambiguous because it was very important to me that soulmates aren't necessarily romantic, and they all have bigger fish to fry than whether or not they'd like to go on dates - given that that's hardly an option while Sun and Moon cannot leave the Plex. The reassurance and relationship beyond the bond actually is the most important part, with Y/N admitting to both Sun and Moon and also themself that they enjoy having them as soulmates, of course! But they'd be friends with or without those dreams, given that Y/N initially approached them both before they even realized. Which is also a relief, because Sun and Moon do feel bad over not being able to confirm that it's reciprocated - they feel like it is, they want it to be (and isn't that the most important part?)! But they don't know. And that's okay - because they found each other, dreams or not, and they won't lose that <3

This is as much as I have right now, and as much as it'll stay for the time being! Enjoy <3

#post let luce #dcamv #kindled spirits #lmao have fun reading this whole thing is 1.7K words #and i mean. the doodles #speaking of.#my art #you can see the aroace (?) jumped out when I tried to make a soulmate AU I could stomach #needed to doodle something yesterday and just. kept thinking abt my year old abandoned self insert fic hfjdks #from before i even joined the public fandom too #felt like it'd be fun though #soulmate aus *are* fun but I also like looking at complications in them #so I made them hurt (:#a little. bc its me. so we get comfort #anyways yes #new au! enjoy! <3

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ultraintrovertedgryffindor · 1 year

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𝐀𝐭𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭 - Aemond Targaryen

third and last part to this mini series. i didn't think i'd make a part two but it came to me in a dream and i couldn't ignore my dreams, also peer pressure but that doesn't matter haha...anyway *cough* also, this last part came to me at like 3 am so

Warnings: SMUT (MINORS DNI), (TW) suicide attempt, attempted sexual assault, Stockholm syndrome, heavy angst, kinda Dark!Aemond (he gets better tho cause i couldn't help myself), incest, mild dubcon, oral (f!receiving), romantic-ish love making, fluff ughhh (this fic makes a complete 180 i'm sorry)

word count | 6k🤙🏻😅

part one | part two

You had never felt more hopeless in your entire life.

You had been pretty resilient throughout your time at King’s Landing, but it slowly dwindled the longer you were forced to stay.

The Greens chipped away at your strength piece by piece until there was barely anything left. You had been forced to stay in your designated chambers, no one allowed in or out besides the maids and guards. You couldn’t count how long it had been since you had seen a friendly face. You were completely alone. You hadn’t even seen your uncle since that night he forced himself on you, you wondered if he got punished for it. Probably not. You hated that you started to actually miss him.

You just wanted to talk to somebody, anybody. You couldn’t just keep staying at the walls all day every day. You even started to wonder how badly it would hurt to throw yourself off your balcony. Would you die before you even hit the ground? Or worse, would you survive the fall?

You had woken up from a nightmare in a cold sweat one morning, shivering and aching all over. You didn’t get out of bed until your mouth started flooding with saliva, a sinking feeling washing over you as you felt your stomach lurch. You barely made it to your chamber pot before emptying the contents of your stomach, bile burning the back of your throat and tears streaming down your face. Spots blurred your vision as you slumped against the wall, leaning your head back as you closed your eye. You tried not to wince as your abdomen tensed painfully, another wave of nausea washing over you. You felt like you had been hit by a dragon, aches and pains all over your body including your empty eye socket. Perhaps the Stranger was finally coming to take you away? Would you be okay with that? Is death really better than being imprisoned?

Unfortunately, you weren’t able to find out. One of the maids that made your baths came in as you started to fall unconscious, but that darkness never took you as she slashed some cold water on your face, making you gasp awake. “You are burning up, my Lady.” The maid spoke softly. “Oh dear, you’ve vomited.”

“Clearly.” You mumbled incoherently.

“How long since you’ve last bled, my Lady?”

Your heart threatened to beat out of your chest for a moment, the thought immediately making you panic. But it hadn’t been that long ago. Sure, it was before Aemond had taken your virginity, but that didn’t automatically mean his seed had taken. “Almost two weeks ago.”

“I shall call for the maester.” The maid helped you to your bed, propping you up onto your pillows and leaving promptly.

No, you weren’t pregnant. You would know, wouldn’t you? Surely, women have a sort of sixth sense about that kind of stuff, right? You could only wait for the maester to tell you. But what would happen if you actually were? Would Alicent marry you and Aemond? The thought sent a shiver down your spine.

A gentle breeze blew in from the balcony. You often kept the doors open as the cool night air helped you fall asleep faster. The idea of escaping this life got more and more appealing as you kept thinking about what would happen if you were carrying a babe. A life such as this is no place to raise a baby, especially not with an enemy of your mother. You made your decision.

You cried out as you stood up from your bed, limping your way to your balcony with wobbly feet. You accidentally hit the wall on your left side, still having great difficulty adjusting to your new eyesight. But it would not matter soon enough. With shaking hands, you held onto the railing of your balcony, looking down on all your mother’s subjects. The sun was barely peeking out from the horizon, casting the kingdom in a light orange glow. King’s Landing was beautiful, truly. It would’ve made a nice home had your mother’s crown hadn’t been stolen. You could imagine your family’s dragons flying freely over the rooftops and towers of the Red Keep, your brothers smiling and laughing with each other, your parents ruling peacefully. Yeah, it would’ve been amazing.

You let out a sob as you heard your dragon’s roars pierce through the air, feeling your sorrow and despair like it was their own. You hoped nothing bad would happen to your dragon. Perhaps they’d get a new rider after you were gone. Maybe the Greens would set them free, let the creature grieve in peace away from the war. Doubtful. The thought almost made you back away from the rail, but you couldn’t handle it anymore. All your life you had been selfless, this one moment would be one of the only times you could allow yourself to be selfish. It would make things easier for your mother. Without the threat of you being killed by the Greens, she could finally torch everyone inside the Red Keep with her dragons.

You struggled to make it up on the railing, but you managed it. You breathed heavily as you looked down, the people below looking as small as ants. You would be okay, you decided. It was a long way down, you would be dead on impact. You smiled weakly as you thought it might feel like you were flying one last time. If not a dragonrider’s death, this would have to do.

You took one final deep breath before stepping off the ledge, expecting to feel the weightlessness of freefall, only it never came.

You were suddenly pulled back violently, falling to the floor of the balcony, your back hitting something hard, but it wasn’t the concrete. You struggled against whoever thwarted your attempt to take your own life, until you saw the briefest flash of long white hair, grazing past your face lightly. “Let me go!” You growled.

“I meant it when I said I’d never let you go.” Aemond spoke quietly, holding you in his arms as tightly as he could without hurting you. “Or did you not remember?” Oh, you remembered alright, how could you not? “I must say, I am quite disappointed that you’d try to leave like this. To kill yourself and possibly our unborn child?” He clicked his tongue in disapproval, but there was an undertone in his voice that made it seem like he was actually upset.

“I’m not pregnant.” You snapped as sharply as you could, feeling your body begging you to give up and give out.

“The maester will be the judge of that. He’s on his way. I’ll make sure you stay alive until then, dear niece.”

Yet again, you were taken back to your bed, your uncle sitting in a chair next to the bed and watching you like a hawk. It was unnerving, to say the least. You kept looking up at the ceiling as sweat kept beading on your forehead, the pain in your abdomen forcing tears in your eye that cascaded down the side of your face. You’ve never missed your mother more. All you wanted was her by your side, to hear her call you her sweet girl one more time, to feel her kiss your forehead in that motherly way only she could. You whimpered as you tried to hold back a sob, curling your fingers into your palm tightly, trying to think of anything else but home.

You flinched as Aemond took your hand, unballing your fist and simply holding it gently, occasionally running his thumb over your knuckles. “Don’t worry, the maester’s due any minute now.” It was so unlike him, to be somewhat reassuring and nice. Did seeing you in utter agony finally thaw his ice cold heart?

“Please, let me go…” You whispered weakly, your voice breaking pitifully.

“No.” He answered.

“What will happen if I am with child, Aemond? I’m sure your mother won’t be too happy about that. She’ll probably kill me herself.” You winced as he squeezed your hand tightly in warning, glaring at you before sighing.

“Do you really think her to be that cruel?”

“You have to get in from somewhere, right?” You gasped as he ripped his hand from yours roughly, standing up to pace with his arms behind his back.

“Must you be so stubborn? I am here trying to be nice and you’re behaving like an ungrateful wretch.” He ranted, his voice threatening to rise but never doing so. He was always skilled at keeping his composure, but you could see how his body tensed and every minute microexpression gave way how much he desired to shout at you.

You scoffed. “I’m sorry if I’m having difficulty letting my guard down in front of my kidnapper.”

“Believe it or not, you are much safer here than you’d ever be at Dragonstone.”

“I don’t care how safe I might be here, I want to go home. I want to be with my family.”

“You are with your family.”

“You don’t treat your family with such hostility. You don’t force your family to take out their own eye. You don’t take away your family’s birthright when it wasn’t theirs to take.”

Aemond chuckled darkly. “You’re one to talk, niece. You took my eye over an insult.”

“You were going to kill my brother.”

“You know I never would have gone through with it. I was a child.”

“And so was I.”

“And then your mother wanted me tortured after you maimed me. My own sister. And don’t tell me she said I was to be sharply questioned. What do you suppose that means, hm? You know, she never once treated me like her own flesh and blood. Nor Aegon, or even Helaena. She never treated us like we were her family. We were always just Alicent’s children. That’s all. Do you think we never wanted a relationship with our own sister? All this was Rhaenyra’s doing, you’d be a fool to not see that. You hold her up on a pedestal, you think she can do no wrong.” Aemond sighed, shaking his head. “If we really were her family, this never would have happened in the first place.”

You wanted to continue the conversation, so badly, but your body simply did not allow it. You let out a soft groan as your throbbing head lolled back, hitting the soft pillows beneath you. You felt like you were going to throw up again, but nothing came up. It didn’t take but a moment until Aemond was back beside you, feeling your forehead with the back of his hand. You heard the doors to your chambers open, the sound of voices and footsteps growing distant until you blacked out.

Aemond hated how worried he was. He wanted to stop his feet from forcing him to pace back and forth outside your doors, the maester inside working to figure out what was happening to you.

You had shown symptoms of being pregnant, but what if it was something else? Would that be better or worse? Alicent had reprimanded him so harshly for bringing you to King’s Landing, Aemond didn’t even know if she would agree to marry them. So if you were with child, it would be a bastard, just like you.

Aemond growled in frustration as the maester took his sweet time in your quarters, then flinching slightly when his mother appeared in front of him. “How is she?” Alicent asked, her voice barely above a whisper, like she feared she’d distract the maester if she spoke any louder even though he was on the other side of a door.

“She was burning up, passed out as soon as the maester arrived.”

Aemond tried not to look worried, more inconvenienced, but Alicent’s motherly instincts, what little she had, could tell he was more upset that he led on. “I’m sure she’ll be alright.” She smiled reassuringly.

Aemond hummed. “Her mother wouldn’t be too pleased if she dies in our care, surely. Has she written back with an answer yet?”

Alicent shook her head. “No. But I know her. She would do anything to protect her children, so I’m hopeful.” They each turned their attention to the maester who exited your room. “What news?”

“I’m afraid the flesh around her eye is infected. We will need to cut away the infected flesh and keep her under our watch around the clock to make sure it doesn’t get infected again. I am hopeful that she will be okay, but we need to get her to surgery immediately.”

“Of course, maester. Do whatever you need to do.”

The surgery was long and tedious, but you made it out okay. The Queen mother had maids rotate out every few hours to keep watch on you, the maester visiting every several hours to check on your bandages and making sure to keep the wound clean. You were asleep all the while, constantly being given milk of the poppy to keep you under and pain free. Not that you’d ever know, but you were in the prayers of Alicent and Helaena, despite being the daughter of the enemy. Aegon couldn’t care less, he thought it was idiotic to keep you alive. But Aemond, he was never seen far from your chambers. He’d visit to see how you were fairing every so often, but he never stayed very long. It wasn’t until the third day of recovery that he stayed in your room more often.

Being addled on milk of the poppy, you had no clue what was going on around you. It was hard to care either way. But sometimes you’d wake up in the middle of the night and you would see Aemond sitting in a chair near the fireplace, reading a book and simply just staring into the flames, then you’d pass out yet again. It became a comfort of sorts to find Aemond in your room, you’d rather it be him than anyone else. Better the devil you know than the devil you don’t, but you slowly started to not see him as a devil. After that conversation you had with him before your surgery, you started to feel bad for him, despite him being the reason you only had one eye now. Although, now that you knew what it was like, it had made you understand him and his motivations a bit more.

After a couple more days, you were starting to be weaned off milk of the poppy. Your head ached and your wound throbbed, but you were glad you were conscious again. But the more conscious you became, the less you saw of Aemond. You were surprised that you actually felt sad by that. This man had kidnapped and violated you, you should’ve been happy to have some space from him. Now you just felt lonely again. You were back to only seeing your maids faces, now the maester every other day. But you were now able to get up and walk around, as long as you didn’t push yourself. You couldn’t even if you wanted to, but now your balcony doors were barred. Aemond must’ve told everyone what had happened, the thought embarrassed you more than it should have.

You were trying to unbar the balcony doors one night, not to jump this time, but you missed the breeze. But you were stopped when your doors opened loudly, causing you to jump and turn around to see… “Aegon?”

“Niece!” The usurper king grinned. “So glad to see you’re up and about, you look healthier than ever. You gave us all a fright you did.”

“You’re drunk, what a surprise.”

“Hey, you’d be drunk all the time if you had to be king too, or, er, queen.”

You rolled your eye, crossing your arms to protect your modesty. “What are you doing here, Aegon?”

“King.” He corrected.

“Not to me.” You snapped, making him frown and send a glare your way.

“Disrespectful cunt.” He mumbled, stumbling towards a chair and taking a seat rather ungracefully.

You probably should’ve been extra cautious around Aegon, even more so since he was drunk, but you had a hard time being afraid when he looked so pitiful. You stepped towards him, kneeling down beside him with the most condescending expression you could muster. “Maybe I’d have more respect if you weren’t a drunken entitled man child that steals his own sister’s throne. You will be a worse king than Maegor the Cruel.”

Despite Aegon being completely wasted, he grabbed a hold of your neck like he was sober, standing up and forcing you up with him, the tightness around your neck making your head spin. “How dare you speak to your king that way?” He spat, his other hand slapping your face and squishing your jaw. “You wish to know true cruelty? Perhaps I shall bring you to my chambers tonight? One night with me and you’ll be on your knees praying that the Stranger comes and takes you away. Or would you enjoy that? Your mother is a whore, maybe the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree? I’ve always wondered what you’d feel like around my cock. I’ve talked to my brother about it, I thought he’d be man enough to come take your maidenhead. But you’re quivering like a leaf right now, maybe I was wrong. I guess my brother is still that little boy who couldn’t stand up for himself. No matter. Your king will take you. You should be honored.”

You quickly bit Aegon’s hand as hard as you could, hearing him let out a satisfying yelp, feeling his harsh grip on you release enough so that you could push him away. “You’re vile!” You yelled, keeping a chair in between you and the drunken man.

Aegon laughed, running his hands through his greasy hair. “Don’t worry, I won’t hurt you…much. Hey, how about this, I’ll forgive your treachery and let you live if you let me take your virginity?”

“Aemond already took it, you fool.” You scowled.

“Oh!” He grinned darkly. “How about that? Guess I don’t have to be gentle with you after all.”

“No, no!” You screamed as Aegon kicked the chair away from you, grabbing you and dragging you to your bed, although with a bit of a struggle due to his drunken state. “Let me go, you lecherous perv!”

Aegon’s mischievous smile quickly dropped as he felt cool steel be placed at the juncture of his neck, the metal already lightly scraping his skin and forcing blood to trickle down his skin. “You heard her. Let her go.” You let out a quiet sigh of relief as Aemond came into view, his dark eye burning into the back of Aegon’s head.

“Brother, you know I could have your head for this?” Aegon growled.

“Not much a king can do if he’s dead.” He said as he pressed the dagger against his skin with more pressure, causing Aegon to hiss in pain as his skin sliced open easily. He rolled his eyes as he let you go, pushing you off of him and onto the bed, Aemond quickly pulling his brother to him.

“I heard you took her maidenhead. I didn’t think you had it in you, brother.” Aegon smirked, even with the dagger to his throat.

“I will only say this once so you would do well to listen, brother. She is mine. Not yours, not anyone else’s. Mine, and only mine. Understand?” Aemond spoke lowly, his eye seemingly staring into Aegon’s soul.

Aegon frowned in annoyance as he held up his hands in surrender. “Fine. She’s all yours.” But Aemond kept his blade out and pointed at his brother until he was completely out the door, only sheathing it when the doors closed.

“Are you alright?” Aemond spoke, his back facing you.

You resisted the urge to ask why he suddenly cared. “Yes…thank you.”

He hummed. “I’ll be right outside your door tonight. Just in case he comes back.”

“You…” You hesitated, completely sure that this was a bad idea, but you couldn’t stop yourself. “You don’t have to. You can stay in here…if you’d like.” You cringed at how awkward you must’ve sounded, but if you did Aemond didn’t notice or care.

“How’s your eye?” He asked as he took a seat in one of your chairs, crossing his legs and making himself comfortable.

“Fine, it doesn't hurt anymore thankfully.” He nodded. The silence was deafening, and you didn’t know if you could handle it all night. But you didn’t know if that’s what he preferred. “Did I worry you much?” You joked, although it came out more serious than you intended. He didn’t look amused. You looked down to hide your frown, picking at your nails with a sigh. “Has there been any word from my mother?”

“No.” He responded curtly.

“What you told me the other night…I didn’t know any of that, how my mother treated you. I knew she didn’t have the best relationships with you all, or any at all. But I never thought she disliked any of you. She never spoke ill of you, she rarely spoke of you at all, so I guess I just assumed that nothing was wrong.” You shrugged. “She’s always been so loving, not just to me and my brothers, but everyone I’ve seen her interact with. You were right…I put her on a pedestal. I couldn’t see her faults. I’m…I’m sorry she treated you all that way. Siblings are supposed to look out for each other.”

Aemond’s expression was unreadable, like it often was. You looked away before you could embarrass yourself further.

“You shouldn’t apologize for the sins of your mother. Like I said before, it was her own doing. But now, she has the opportunity to make things right.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” But Aemond only shook his head. You decided not to push him further. “Did you hope that I’d get pregnant?”

Aemond seemed shocked by your blunt question, but shrugged with a frown. “It would’ve made things easier perhaps. It would’ve forced my mother to marry us, and give Rhaenyra more incentive to bend the knee.”

You chuckled bitterly, shaking your head. “Do you want to marry me that badly?” You joked.

“Would it be so terrible?” He asked seriously, forcing you to actually think about it. “Or do you truly want your mother to kill us all? Do you want this war to happen?”

“No…of course not. I never wanted this to happen.” You exhaled shakily, finding it hard to relax under Aemond’s intense gaze. “If there’s even a chance anything could stop this war without bloodshed, I would do it.”

“Truly anything?”

You had a feeling where he was leading with that question, but you took the bait anyway. “Yes. Anything.” You tensed as Aemond lifted himself off his chair, taking a seat on the bed right beside you, his body heat radiating off of him and enveloping you. Goosebumps rose all over your body as he caressed the side of your face with the back of his hand, his eye gazing into yours. “Aemond-”

“Marry me.” He cupped your jaw, keeping you facing him. “You said you’d do anything. Your mother might give up if you agree. So, marry me, be my wife.”

“And if she doesn’t bend the knee?” You whispered.

“She will if she truly cares for you. Will you risk it?”

You took a deep breath, leaning forward to seal your fate with a kiss. “Yes. I’ll marry you…”

Aemond grinned before capturing your lips in another kiss, feeling his neediness and longing through him. You felt like a traitor yourself as you gave in to him, allowing yourself to want and need. Your mother would be so disappointed in you, but you truly thought it would be best for the kingdom and your family. You wondered if she’d actually bend the knee, or would she call you a traitor as well? You tried not to dwell on it. All you wanted right now was Aemond, to feel him all over your body, to feel him at the apex of your thighs that was already throbbing with desire.

You didn’t realize you were crying until Aemond pulled away with furrowed brows, wiping away your fallen tears with his thumb. “It’ll be okay.” He whispered, turning you on your back, settling himself in between your legs, keeping one arm propped up so he wouldn’t crush you. But that’s exactly what you wanted.

Aemond let out a noise of surprise when you pulled him down on you, his body completely covering you. Your heavy breaths mixed with each other, your kisses getting sloppy and rough. It wasn’t enough. Even when you had removed each other’s clothes, you still didn’t feel close enough.

You pushed Aemond’s head down your body, sighing heavily as he trailed kisses down your torso until he reached your pelvis, looking up at you hungrily through a heavy lidded eye. “Shall I taste you, princess?” He teased with a smile, spreading your legs as far as they could go and planting sloppy kisses on your inner thighs.

“Please, my prince.”

You whined as Aemond licked up your folds, gathering the wetness that had already pooled at your entrance. He took his time, slowly running his tongue through your slit over and over until you huffed with desperation. “You taste divine. I should’ve done this before. What a fool I was.” You moaned as he whirled the tip of his tongue in circles around your clit, gripping your hips to keep you from bucking against his mouth.

“Seven hells…” You gasped as he closed his lips around your sensitive nub to suckle on it while slowly pushing one of his fingers inside you, curling the digit rhythmically. “Aemond, fuck!” What a fucking traitor you were, delighting in the feeling of the enemy. But you couldn’t help it, the way he so expertly pleased you, being a traitor never felt so good.

Soon enough, Aemond added another finger, stretching you out preemptively, the lewd squelching sound coming from your cunt making your cheeks heat up like you had just stuck your face in an oven. But it was so erotic, even Aemond moaned at the sound, the vibration from his lips making you squeal softly. Though, it ended far too early in your opinion. You watched with parted lips as he came up for air, licking his slick coated lips with a smirk, crawling back up to kiss you hungrily.

You could feel his heavy cock poke at your entrance, making you clench in anticipation. Aemond didn’t even have to guide himself, he just slowly sank into you, both of you letting out loud gasps. He kept eye contact with you as he pushed in inch by inch, kissing all over your face whenever you winced or let out a soft cry, shushing you and trying to get you to relax around him. Even with foreplay, you didn’t know if you would ever get used to his size. But you were thankful he helped you adjust unlike last time. This time, he was sweet and attentive. You wondered where that side of him came from.

“Fuck…” Aemond groaned, finally bottoming out and stilling inside you. “You feel just as heavenly as the first time we lay together, beautiful.” You whimpered as the praise went straight to your core, making him hiss as you pulsed around him. “You can’t do that to me, princess. I want to take my time with you tonight.”

You let out a silent gasp as Aemond thrusted a couple times shallowly, trying to maintain his composure and be as gentle as possible until he settled into a slow but deep pace. You felt so full, his intense eye contact sending a shiver down your spine while the tip of his cock brushed up against that sweet spot inside you. He forced his arms underneath you, pulling you as close to him as possible, holding your back and pressing his chest against yours, like a horizontal hug. You wrapped your legs around his waist as he buried his head in the crook of your neck, pulling him deeper as he placed soft kisses on your skin, then turning his head to face you and kissing your cheek.

Feeling his breaths fanning across the side of your face, you turned your head to look at him, unable to restrain yourself from kissing him. You moaned wantonly as he sped up his thrusts slightly, angling his hips so he could hit that spot inside you over and over again. It was so intimate, the close proximity and sensuality of it all. Too much and not enough, but you gave all control over to Aemond. You didn’t trust him, it would take a long time for you to be able to trust him, but something told you he wouldn’t hurt you, not again.

You felt your orgasm build up gradually, each thrust of Aemond’s hips bringing you closer and closer to the edge, but you both didn’t rush, he wasn’t allowing that. But it almost made it better. You weren’t foolish enough to call it romantic, nothing about you and Aemond’s relationship was romantic, not yet at least; but in different circumstances, you could say this was romantic love making. The way he was looking at you made butterflies swirl in your stomach, like you were the only woman in King’s Landing. You hated how special it made you feel.

Your heavy panting echoed throughout the room as Aemond lifted himself up to reach down between the two of you to rub your clit slowly, kissing you languidly and swallowing every single one of your moans. “That’s it…” He moaned. “Come for me, princess.” It didn’t take any more encouragement, you were already so close, able to obey him immediately. Your orgasm wasn’t overpowering; it was slow and gentle much like Aemond’s thrusts and fingers, but it still raised goosebumps all over your body and hardened your nipples as it washed over you, a soft whimper escaping your lips.

Aemond kept up that slow and deep pace, sucking and biting each of your nipples, eliciting an overstimulated whine from you. “My pretty girl…my beautiful girl.” He whispered, kissing your forehead as he sped up his thrusts, grabbing your wrists and pinning them beside your head. “Mine…mine.” You let out a cry as he rutted against you faster and faster, jolting your body with each thrust, but he silenced you by kissing you, keeping his lips pressed against yours until his thrusts become sloppy and erratic. Aemond let out a low groan as he stilled inside you, his eye rolled to the back of his head as he coated your walls with his cum. He collapsed on top of you with heavy panting breaths, kissing along your collarbone as he came down from his high. “Are you okay?” He asked softly.

“Yes, Aemond. That was…lovely.” You smiled in exhaustion, quietly giggling to yourself as he rolled off you and laid down against the bed dramatically. “Will you stay this time?”

“If you wish.”

“I do.”

“Then here I’ll remain.”

It was hard to keep you and Aemond apart after that night. He was more gentle and protective over you. It took some time getting used to his affection, but there came a point when you didn’t think about how you had to be with him out of duty, like you were just a pawn in this war game. You started to enjoy his company. It didn’t take much convincing to get Alicent to agree to marry you to Aemond, seeing his infatuation for you and how it might turn the tide in their favor.

You had to send a letter to your mother about your betrothal to your uncle, which terrified you. The word traitor echoing in your mind over and over again. You knew Daemon would not take it well, knowing him. But you prayed to the Seven that your mother would call off the war, for the sake of your family and the whole kingdom.

You almost couldn’t believe it when Aemond came to you with a huge grin on his face, informing you that your mother had bent the knee for the sake of the realm, accepting Aegon’s terms if only she could attend your wedding. She did not want to rule over ash and bone, she wouldn’t be a good ruler if she went to war, knowing there would be a limitless amount of casualties if she went through with going to war. She just wanted to see her daughter again.

A wave of relief washed over the entire Red Keep at the news, Alicent seeming even more overjoyed than you were.

The wedding would take place in a few days. You were excited for more than a few reasons. You would see your family again, Alicent having them come over by ship. And when you were a little girl, you always dreamed of having one of those fairytale weddings like most. It would be drastically different, but it excited you nonetheless. Aemond seemed to feel the same, relieved and overjoyed, but he only showed it when he was alone with you.

You finally felt at ease, like everything was going to work out.

Then came the night before the wedding, you felt the nerves flowing through your body. It had just now hit you that you were going to be marrying Aemond, in front of hundreds of people including your family. You weren’t one to get stage fright, but Seven Hells, you were frightened.

A knock on your door cut your thoughts short, calling out for whoever to enter your chambers. You relaxed when it was only Aemond, silently entering your room with a small smile. “I thought the groom wasn’t supposed to see the bride the night before the wedding.” You teased.

“I’m not superstitious.”

“No, you wouldn’t be. But, why have you come?”

“I have a gift for you. A wedding present.”

“Before the actual wedding?”

“Yes.” He chuckled, motioning for you to take a seat on the end of your bed. You waited with bated breath as he pulled out a small box, handing it to you tentatively. “Go on, open it.”

You carefully opened the little box, gasping at the contents inside. “Aemond…” You whispered, you looked at him in shock. It was a beautiful sapphire, very much resembling the one that replaced his own eye.

“The maesters said that your wound has healed enough that it could hold a gem comfortably. I chose the sapphire, but if you prefer something else, I can-”

“Aemond.” You interrupted him tearfully. “It’s beautiful. Perfect. I love it.”

“Only the best for you, my love.”

You never thought your life would end up this way. You never thought the situation you found yourself in would end happily, you thought it would end painfully and messy, but it didn’t. You were about to be married to someone you had grown to deeply care about. You were reunited with your family who supported you and loved you just the same as they had before. You finally felt that motherly love you had been craving these past couple months.

As the wedding finally started, everyone in the audience whispered amongst themselves as you walked in, your long flowing white dress dragging along the floor, and a bright blue sapphire in your empty eye socket. You and Aemond stood in front of each other with big smiles on your faces, looking at each other like you two were the only people in the room. You looked at your family, seeing their smiles of approval, making you feel at peace more than you ever have in your life.

After saying your vows, swearing to honor and cherish each other before the Seven, you both sealed the engagement with a passionate kiss. You pulled away as everyone clapped and cheered, each other’s sapphire’s shimmering in the light and reflecting off each other.

The two of you truly looked like you were made for each other.

I"M SUCH A SUCKER FOR A HAPPY ENDING I"M SORRY I COULDN"T HELP MYSELF

tag list: @drawing-kitty1, @candypurplebutterfly, @siriusdumblittlepuppy, @chromesunbeams

#house of the dragon #aemond targaryen #aemond targaryen x f!reader #aemond targaryen imagine #aemond targaryen x reader #aemond targaryen smut #aemond targaryen x targaryen!reader #aemond targaryen x female reader #aemond targaryen x fem!reader

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nunya7394 · 11 months

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Pedro Pascal Fic Recommendations

Or… all the fics I’ve been reading.

(Joel Miller TLOU) Burning in A Hopeless Dream by @tightjeansjavi 16/??

(Frankie Morales/TLOU Crossover)The Pilot and his Girl by @avastrasposts 15/??

(Joel Miller TLOU) Lavender by @justagalwhowrites 40/???

(Joel Miller TLOU) A Stranger’s Heart Without a Home by @morning-star-joy 20/20. Complete

(Joel Miller TLOU) Someone’s Wife in the boat of someone’s husband by @netherfeildren 6/???

(Joel Miller TLOU) Apothecary by @atinylittlepain 9/??

(Joel Miller TLOU) Last Chance by @keeshya6 5/???

(Joel Miller TLOU) texas sun by @from-the-clouds 14/14 complete

(Frankie Morales) Through the scope series by @ssuperficialspacecadett 10/???

(Joel Miller TLOU) strawberry wine by @pedrito-friskito 27/??

(Javier Pena Narcos) just dumb enough to try by @whatsnewalycat 26/26 complete

(Joel Miller TLOU) just friends by @guess-my-next-obsession 2/??

(Frankie Morales) shared breaths by @frenchiereading 12/??

(Joel Miller TLOU) In the Woods Somewhere by @eupheme 5/5 complete

(Joel Miller TLOU) Broken Without You by @sourwolf-sterek32 13/??

(Joel Miller TLOU) Come Home by @imtryingmybeskar 23/??

Thank you to all the amazing writers who are keeping me entertained with your beautiful storytelling.

Also, how many is too many fics to be reading at once?

#joel the last of us #joel miller x reader #masterlist #the last of us #javier peña #javier pena x reader #frankie morales #series masterlist #rec list

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thecampjuicebox · 6 months

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To have and to hold Pt. 1

A couple of weeks before Tav and Gale's wedding night, Tav is having second thoughts. Seeking out a past lover before the big night, turns her world upside-down.

Pairing: Tav(f) x Gale x Astarion

POV: 2nd person (Reader is Tav)

Trying my hand at a multi-part fic. Let me know what you think! This idea was suggested to me and I couldn't NOT do it. This is gonna be a long one. Buckle up!

Dress fittings, picking out decorations, venue tours, flowers, food choices, invitations and exchanging kisses with family and friends you've neglected to speak to since the Nether Brain had fallen - all aspects of a wedding you didn't seem to take into account when accepting Gale's proposal. You love him, yes. Unconditionally. With every fiber of your being, and those floating through the weave. And yet.. Regret bubbles up in your gut while staring at yourself in the mirror, hands smoothing the bone white lace on the bodice of your wedding dress. You fumble with the top of your corset, shifting uncomfortably at the stiff boning. Shadowheart stands behind you, one hand placed gently on your shoulder and she leans in to whisper to you, your pointed ears perking up.

"There's still time to turn back, you know."

Your heart thumps audibly in your chest and you sigh, picking at your fingernails. You didn't want to admit how frightened you are. You've never considered forever. Especially not with someone like Gale. Charming, handsome, intelligence unmatched. He was the perfect candidate. The man your late mother always dreamed you'd bring home to the family, Selune bless her. You choke back tears at the thought of her. How she won't be there for the big moment anyways, so why does it matter who you wed? You'd also never been to Waterdeep. You and Gale decided to stay in Baldur's Gate briefly while you made the preparations. It was easier that way. Gale had traveled back to Waterdeep for short bursts of time, mostly to see that Tara, his tressym and trusted friend, was well taken care of. You decided to stay back every time, much to Gale's dismay. Something about making the trek to your soon to be forever home made you uneasy any time he'd ask. You've traveled all over Faerun and back. Hells, you'd even plunged into Avernus more times than you'd be willing to admit. The idea of spending your days in a tower with a tressym, a husband, and an endless supply of books was not how you thought you'd end your travels, though. Mrs. Dekarios. You'd take his last name, obviously. Wear it as a badge of honor. Meet his family, bare his children. Gods.. Children. The idea makes you nauseous, hot bile threatening to fight its way up your throat. Shaking your head, you tune back in to the sounds of the quaint Baldurian dress shop. You were no stranger to Figaro's. You came to enjoy the lavish clothing he offers. Textures your fingers never felt before the cult of the Absolute forced it's way into your life. You were reborn, newly cultured, and so very exhausted by all of it. Karlach stands, making her way over to the small platform you stand on and she meets your eyes in the mirror.

"Everything okay, Soldier?"

You chuckle at the nickname. Soldier.. You feel like anything but a soldier right now. Her warm hand reaches down to capture yours and she gives it a reassuring squeeze. Tears well up in your large brown eyes and you lower your head once more to ease the burning in your tear ducts. You feel so hopeless. Surrounded by the people you love most, but so entirely and devastatingly alone. Your thoughts swirl in your brain, engulfing the area the tadpole once lived. How could you be so ready to give up on Gale? You know he loves you just as much as you love him. If not more. Definitely more. A quiet sob escapes you and you crumble onto the platform, startling Shadowheart and Karlach. In confusion, the two kneel beside you, each one grabbing a hand.

"Gods, Tav.. What has gotten into you?"

Karlach's voice is stern and low, her fingers tightening around yours to ground you in the moment. Shadowheart sighs and shakes her head. She knows. She understands. Small cries rattle your ribcage as a never-ending stream of tears streaks your flushed cheeks. Embarrassment burns in your throat and you quickly stand again, both hands yanking away from your companions. You want nothing more to be free of this dress and the agonizingly tight corset holding all of you in. You reach back and tug at the laces of the corset in frustration, failing to loosen anything before throwing your hands down at your sides once more.

"I'd like to be free of this death trap, please."

You mumble quietly. Shadowheart giggles and begins unlacing the corset while Karlach moves to the front of you, both hands now resting on the tops of your trembling shoulders.

"It's going to be alright. Everyone gets nervous before their wedding. Hells, I'd be fucking batshit if I were in your position. Especially with someone as grand as Gale."

You allow a giggle to pass your frown and sigh heavily in relief when Shadowheart finally frees you from the corset, the pale leather folding neatly in her gentle hands.

"Looks like you need a hefty meal and a nap, Soldier. Let's get going. Your dress fits you just fine."

Figaro scoffs in the corner and collects the corset from Shadowheart, placing it down on a velvet bench before extending his hand to you and helping you down from the platform. He leads you to a small room so you can change back into your normal clothing, quickly shutting the curtain behind him as he steps out. You sigh and quickly shimmy out of your dress, carefully folding the fancy fabric and leaving it on the small stool in the room.

...

"Where are you headed off to? How was your dress fitting? I assume you've gotten all of the details figured out with Figaro by now?"

Gale's eyes lift from the dusty tome lying open on his desk. He scans your form, taking inventory of the cloak you've draped over your shoulders. You wiggle your toes in your boots and shrug off his concerned tone.

"I uh.. Derryth needs help collecting noblestock. Baelen is ill. The fitting went.. About as well as expected. Karlach cried, Shadowheart told me I should get the dress in black, Figaro was disgusted by that idea."

Your fingers drum against your thighs and you turn to look at him, attempting the most sincere look you can muster in the moment. The wizard's eyes narrow on you and he nods slowly, placing his palms flat on his desk to help lift him from his stool. His fingers graze the page on the tome before he begins his trek across the room to you. Gale pulls you into a tight hug, one hand grasping your waist while the other smooths your dark hair against the back of your head.

"Ah yes, Figaro and his.. Closed-minded fashion sense. Well, I'm glad the shop at least didn't go up in flames. The Underdark, hmm? Be safe, my love. Send word when you're on your way back, yes?"

You nod at his words and rest your head against his chest, the gentle thumping of his heart calming the nervous fizz in your brain for a moment. The soft velvet of his robe tickles your cheek and you nuzzle against it in the same fashion Tara would, but with much less purring. Gale chuckles and pecks the top of your head, mumbling a soft "I love you" against your scalp before he releases you, his hand reaching for yours to quickly caress the finger with your engagement ring on it. A soft smile thins his lips and he motions for you to make your exit. You smile nervously up at him, pulling your hand away gently and you turn to leave, your hands coming to your front to slowly slide your ring off of your finger and into your thigh pouch, your teeth catching your bottom lip. You slip into the night, tugging your cloak hood up to further shroud you in darkness.

...

You missed the glowing alure of the Underdark. The Myconid Colony serving as a beacon of calming light. You let out a quiet sigh at the familiar surroundings and cross your arms over your heaving chest, taking a moment to drink in the atmosphere and catch your breath. You weren't here to collect noblestock, and quite honestly, you're proud of yourself for the excuse you had come up with on the spot. You're in search of something much more valuable to you. A vampire spawn. The very one you'd shared so many sleepless nights with while infected with the tadpoles. Astarion. His name sends a shudder through your entire body. After your group took down Cazador in his crypt, Astarion made the impossible decision to kill the vampire lord and stop the Black Mass, freeing his fellow spawn to live in the shadows for eternity. Unfortunately, he was doomed to the same fate once the Nether Brain was defeated. You blink tears away from your eyes, rubbing your palms into the sockets to ease the slight burning. The thought of him cowering at the sun just after the final fight, running off never to be seen again, it makes your heart ache in a way you didn't think possible. And it has been exactly that long since you've laid eyes on the spawn. But you remember him so vividly. His pearlescent skin. His crimson eyes. His silvery hair that always rested in perfect curls, even after the roughest of battles with goblins.

Continuing your walk through the Underdark, your eyes fall on more familiar territory. The Duergar camp, nestled just on the edge of the black water you fondly remember sailing to Grymforge. However, the camp is... Inhabited. Rebuilt. Much more beautiful than you remember, large purple crystals growing in tall pillars around the quaint wooden houses peppered around the area. Long rope bridges connect the homes and buildings on the higher cliffs, chasm creeper and mushrooms speckled about on the rock. Your tired legs seem to will you towards the new found civilization, the promise of sleep fogging your brain. Taking a step into the camp, your eyes scan the surroundings, a few faces seeming oddly familiar to you. A tall, long haired vampire spawn with the scarring of runes scattered about his face approaches you, his crimson eyes cutting through the dark gloom. The purple glow of the crystal pillars around you grants you just enough light to make out his facial features.

"Tav..?"

"Sebastian?!"

Your eyes widen at the sudden realization. Sebastian is one of the Spawn your group freed from Cazador's crypt. A bright smile adorns your tired face and you sprint towards him, quickly embracing him in a tight hug. You nearly knock him off of his feet, your hands gripping the soft fabric of the back of his coat. The spawn chuckles and catches your short frame, gently lifting you from the dirt and giving you a playful twirl, earning a giggle. You inhale deeply, the scent of lavender and deep earth filling your nostrils.

"It's lovely to see you. Astarion hasn't stopped talking about his adventures by your side. I do believe he's around here somewhere. But what are you doing here, Dear? "

Your breath catches in your throat at the mention of his name. He's here. He's really here. You traveled all the way beneath the ground on an inkling that he might have followed the other spawn to the Underdark to seek refuge from the burning sun. Your heart thumps in your chest and Sebastian inhales your excitement deeply. He places you back onto your feet and takes a step back, smoothing his coat down before motioning for you to follow him. You nod and make haste, trying your best to keep up with his quick strides as he leads you in, what you assume to be, the direction of the spawn you initially traveled here to see. Sebastian stops in front of a large wooden door, tapping a few knocks onto the surface with the knuckle of his index finger. He holds his free hand out to you, motioning for you to wait outside once he hears a quiet "Enter" from the dark room behind the door. He carefully opens the door and steps inside, blocking the being within the walls from seeing you.

"Pardon me, Astarion. You have a visitor."

"A visitor? I thought I told that wretch that it was a one time thing! Gods, these deep gnomes are needy. Very well, send him in."

Sebastian stifles a chuckle and steps aside, revealing your presence to the the vampire. You step forward into the dim candlelight of his home, bottom lip caught nervously between your teeth, biting impressively hard on the sensitive flesh. Astarion looks even more beautiful than you remember. His hair a touch longer than before, but still arranged in that intoxicating mess of curls. A sparkling silver chalice rests between his pale, slender fingers and he swirls the contents in it with finesse. A familiar metallic tang lingers in the air along with the soft scent of bergamot and rosemary. A scent you grew very fond of when you were traveling alongside the spawn. One you often find yourself craving back home. Astarion is lying on a small velvet love seat, one leg outstretched and the other bent with his foot resting firmly in the plush cushion beneath him. Piles of dusty books and candles speckle the tables and floors around him, the room still tidy, but certainly lived in. His back rests against the armrest and he stretches for a moment before his eyes drift towards the front door. As he slowly turns his attention to the new intruder, he takes another sip from the chalice and he chokes suddenly, sputtering the red liquid. You stand in the doorway, hands clasped behind your back and you watch his reaction, a light smirk building on your lips. Astarion hurries to his feet, setting the chalice down with care to not spill any more of its contents before moving towards you swiftly.

"Tav is.. Is that you?"

You nod quickly and he whisks you from the floor, his face burying into the crook of your warm neck. You shudder at the sensation of his cold nose nuzzling your skin and you snake your arms around his shoulders, hands finding a comfortable spot in his soft hair. He groans at your touch and tugs you impossibly close to his frame, inhaling every bit of your scent that his nose will allow. Sebastian excuses himself, quietly closing the heavy door behind him.

"I've missed you, little star.."

"Where the hells have you been?"

You cling to him tightly, tears threatening to spill over your cheeks at his question. You shake your head and slowly slide from his embrace. His face contorts into a look of confusion, large eyes glimmering in the candle light when he focuses on your change of posture.

"Little love.. What ever could be the matter?"

You couldn't possibly tell him here. Not now. Not in this moment. You palm at your eyes once more before lifting your head to meet his gaze. He reaches out a gentle hand and cups your burning cheek, lovingly stroking the bone there with his thumb. You tilt your head into his touch and savor the feeling of his skin on yours again, finally. You've missed the vampling so much. Your heart pounds like a goblin war drum behind your ribs. He takes a step closer to you, his free arm gently snaking around your waist. Leaning down, he presses a gentle kiss to your forehead, the salty taste of your sweat making his pupils dilate. A quiet whine slips past your lips.

"Speak to me, Tav. You're never so tongue tied, you poor thing. What has you so rattled?"

Shaking your head, your arms fly around Astarion's neck, taking him by surprise. He stumbles backwards, bumping his calves against the ornate wooden frame of the loveseat and he sits down to catch himself, a small grunt breaking the otherwise harsh silence of the room. You collapse on top of his thin but toned frame and gasp at the impact. Wet eyes meeting his, you suck your bottom lip into your mouth and bite at it, drawing blood. Astarion senses the metallic hint in the air and groans, your very familiar and intoxicating scent making his grasp on you tighten in a primal fashion. He mumbles a soft "Gods.." and reaches one hand up to grasp your chin, forcing you to look up at him. You strain your eyes in the candlelight, releasing your bottom lip, the skin there now bruised, little rivulets of your life's essence staining the skin there.

"Astarion I..."

His grasp on you loosens and his gaze softens. He flashes you a gentle smile and cocks his head to the side. He knows exactly what he's doing to you, and though he revels in the idea that he can still fluster you this way, you feel his intentions have changed. The way his hands rest respectfully on your lower back now, the gentle drumming of his fingers against your spine. He's hungry, but he's doing so well restraining himself. The Astarion you met after the Nautiloid crash and the Astarion seated beneath you now are so incredibly different. It only makes you want to explore him more, to learn his new ways. And it feels so, incredibly wrong.

"Yes?"

"H-Have you eaten? Lately, I mean. I can't imagine there's much to feast on in the Underdark.."

Your question makes his eyebrows knit together for a moment, his expression twisting at the thought of just how hungry he is. Sure, he's eaten. Feasted upon a deep gnome here and there, their blood burning the inside of his mouth as he drinks. He hasn't, however, had anything nearly as delicious as your blood since the death of the Nether Brain. You were the last of your kind that he fed on, and he missed the taste all the same.

"I have eaten, yes. But, you know I am a man of.. Tremendous appetite."

His velvet words send a shiver down your spine and you press to him tightly now, closing the small gap that was left between your torsos while you straddle one of his legs. His knee presses into your mound and you try your best to block to feeling out of your mind. His eyes meet yours, full of lust. Full of hunger. Tinted with the gentle flicker of.. Love. You were his first mortal, after all. And he would be a liar if he told you that all of those nights of honeyed words and sweet nothings weren't how he truly felt about you. You offered yourself to him in a way no one ever has. Not with the intent to sleep with him. Just with the intent to make sure he was taken care of. A debt he, to this day, has no idea how to repay. His thought process is halted when you lean in close, bloodied lips grazing the length of his earlobe and you mutter quietly.

"I-If you're hungry.. Feed."

You back yourself up to meet his gaze once more. His eyebrows furrow and he growls, the deep noise causing your insides to ignite. Without hesitation, Astarion leans forward and flicks his tongue out against your sensitive bottom lip, lapping at the blood that has begun to dry there. He earns a whine from you, his pointy ears perking up at the sound. He smirks, determined for more noises and he sucks your bottom lip between his own, sinking a fang into the already abused flesh. You moan quietly, tilting your head back to tug your lip away from his grasp and your hands meet his chest, fingers toying with the ruffles around the collar of his silk shirt. The vampling's breath stutters at the encounter, your hands on his chest making his hairs stand on end. You instinctively grind your hips down into his, your leathers making a quiet noise from the friction. "Please.." you stutter, hands pulling at the front of his shirt now, your begging making Astarion's head swirl. Nose first, Astarion nuzzles into the side of your neck again, this time with much more intent, tracing the length of your perfectly soft skin. Baring his fangs to the open space, he quickly drags the flat of his tongue to prime the area for the sensation of the sharp pricks. His teeth sink into the flesh there, like ice shards. The pain is delicious and dizzying. You roll your hips again, this time Astarion's hips bucking upwards to meet your already wet core. You ache for him and you hate yourself for it. He laps the now steady stream of blood he's drawn from your neck, a low groan ringing in your ear as he drinks. In the past, he would drink while you were unconscious. Now, you wished you'd have been awake every time you had offered your neck to him. The little noises he makes, the way he gently cradles the back of your head while he feeds.. It's intoxicating. You're drunk off of the pain and the pleasure. Drunk off of Astarion. His lips leave your skin, tongue tracing the new pierce marks he's left in the crook of your neck. His hands remain where they are, one cradling the back of your head, the other tightly gripping the back of your shirt. He sighs to himself, tilting his head back as he cleans the crimson fluid from his lips.

"By the Nine Hells, you're just as delicious as I remember. I need more of you.."

His hands both slide to meet the tie of your cloak, making quick work of undoing it, the dark fabric sliding to the floor at his feet. Your body trembles beneath every movement, every feather-light touch from his fingers. As much as you love him, this was a feeling Gale has never been able to give to you. You love him.. Differently. You love his intellect. You love how much he adores Tara. You love his affinity for books and the way he talks about the weave. But your love for Astarion.. That was leaps and bounds deeper than anything you've ever felt. His touch sets your skin on fire. Your name sounds like a lyric on his tongue, soft and melodious. You crave him. His presence. His existence. You crave all of it. Tears threaten your eyes again and Astarion notices immediately. His hands quickly cup your cheeks and his soft lips crash to yours, your entire body falling limp against him. Arousal boils your blood, bubbling up into your throat, escaping as a soft moan against the vampire's lips. You're unraveling right there in his arms. He kisses you in a way you never in your life have been kissed, teeth knocking, tongues wrestling for dominance, the slight copper taste of blood lingering in his mouth from his meal. Your hips find a steady rhythm, rocking back and forth against his lap, the two of you moaning in tandem at the fiery friction building between your bodies. His right hand snaps upwards to grab your throat, thumb and fingers pressing harshly into the sides of your neck, your breath labored by the force of his palm against your trachea. Hungry red eyes meet your gaze and Astarion's lips slowly form the words that will be your undoing.

"Your body keeps no secrets, my love. This is what you want, isn't it? To lose yourself in me?"

You moan at his words, jaw falling slack. His hand moves upwards to press his thumb into your mouth, a quiet "Suck." commanding your lips to close around the digit, tongue lapping at his fingerprint. He watches you, pupils blown out with desire, hair disheveled from your previous kiss. You continue to suck on his thumb, his free fingers tapping rhythmically against your cheek bone and he purrs in delight. Your bones vibrate, your core aches, walls fluttering around nothing. He slips his thumb from between your lips with a gentle "pop" and replaces it with his middle and index finger. You obediently take the new fingers just as you did the thumb, moistening them with your saliva. He presses down on the flat of your tongue and you stick it out, allowing him to swipe his fingers around in your spittle. A devilish grin thins his lips as he watches you.

"So good.. Let's put this to good use, shall we?"

He slides his wet fingers down towards the waistband of your leathers, using his free hand to tug them forward. You curse under your breath, unable to do anything but watch. His fingers hastily meet your core, swiping teasingly slow between your think folds and you collapse against him, shaky little moans ringing in his ears. He groans at how wet you are, wasting no time to dip two digits into your aching cunt, finally granting you the pleasure you've been seeking. His thumb presses tightly to your clit and he moves it in agonizingly slow circles, first clockwise, then counter clockwise, and suddenly, in no particular pattern. You writhe against his hand, gasping and whining.

"That's it. Such a mess."

He pumps his fingers in and out of you slowly, relishing in the beautiful noises he earns in return. You're at the precipice now. You grind into his hand feverishly and throw your head back, whining into the open air, his name coming out in little yelps and moans. However, he keeps the slow pace. Taking his sweet, sweet time with you. It's been so long since he's touched you. Made you moan like this. Made you drop all defenses and absolutely lose yourself in him. He loves every second of it, his own pleasure coming solely from pleasuring you. He wants nothing more than to deliver you the ecstasy you so greatly deserve. It's the only way he knows how to repay you for the kindness, love, and support you've shown him in this lifetime. You'd never be up front about asking him for sex, let alone to touch you like this. You're the only person he's ever known to respect how he feels, what he wants, what he needs. For this, he has grown to love you with every ounce he's able to give. The time apart from you was agonizing and he spent many nights, eyes wide open, staring at the ceiling, praying to whatever gods would hear him that you would return to him. That you'd crawl into his bed once more so he could hold you and drink in your warmth. However, he knew you were somewhere else, with someone else. He didn't have the heart to approach you about it in this moment. All he wanted was to be here, with you. To enjoy you for as long as he possibly could before you slipped away, more unknown amounts of time passing before he'd be able to lay eyes on you again. To take in your sweet scent, one he has tried for months to recreate in a perfume. Vanilla, sandalwood, and woodsmoke. A tantalizing combination that leaves his brain all fuzzy and warm. He snaps back to reality, focusing harder now on your moans and the wiggle of your hips. The knot in your belly tightens with each stroke of his fingers against that heavenly spot within your walls, your arousal soaking his entire hand and the leathers that separate your skin from the cold air. His free hand grasps your hip, stilling your desperate grinding.

"Come for me, pet."

The movement of his fingers keeps a slow, steady pace. His thumb continues to rub into your clit, pressing a little harder now to throw you over the edge. You tighten around him, the knot in your core finally snapping, ecstasy making your eyes roll into your buzzing skull. The loud moan you let out surprises even you as you come undone against his hand. He grins proudly, working you through your climax, whispering sweet affirmations of how well you're doing during your comedown. Carefully sliding his fingers from your leathers, he pops one into his mouth, savoring your warm slick. His lids flutter in enjoyment and you watch him closely.

"You are.. Filthy.."

You giggle and wrap your arms sleepily around his shoulders, burying your face into the crook of his neck. He wraps his arms around your waist and pulls you up to straddle him now, hands cupping the supple meat of your ass. You close your eyes tightly, the reality of tonight's events creating a pit in your stomach. You fight with yourself internally. Should you tell Astarion? Should you tell Gale? Should you even go home? A quiet sigh leaves you and your breath coasts along Astarion's pale flesh, making him tremble momentarily. He rests his chin on your shoulder and mumbles quietly. His next words make your stomach drop, your eyes shooting open suddenly.

"Well, this should be fun to explain to Gale.."

#baulders gate 3 #bg3 #gale of waterdeep #gale dekarios #astarion #bg3 fanfic #astarion smut

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thelastofusff · 1 year

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Welcome to my recommendations! Below, please find fics sorted by main characters in The Last of Us including Joel Miller, Ellie Williams, Tommy Miller, Tess Servopoulos and more…

For each character, fics will be sorted by NSFW/SFW content, then series/one-shots. All will be tagged as pre/post outbreak. Newly added fics are always marked with an '✨' - they will be removed between list updates to make way for new content!

PLEASE NOTE: There will be NO NSFW content featuring Ellie as a minor.

All NSFW content is 18+ ONLY. 🔞

Don't see your fav fics? SUBMIT THEM HERE.

NSFW

A Future Together by kteague (pre/post outbreak) [multi] Breaking the Rules by theywhowriteandknowthings (pre-outbreak) [multi] ✨ Burn for Me by @psychedelic-ink (post outbreak) [one-shot] Burning in a Hopeless Dream by tightjeansjavi (post outbreak) [multi] Crave by @allfoolsinluv (no outbreak) [multi] Exile by psychedelic-ink (post-outbreak) [one-shot] ✨ Feral by @ohraicodoll (post-outbreak) [multi] Lost in the Darkness by softlyspector (no outbreak) [one-shot] ✨ Moment’s Silence by @nexusnyx (post-outbreak) [multi] Punisher by beskarandblasters (pre/post-outbreak) [multi] ✨ September by @wheresarizona (post-outbreak) [multi] Stay In Bed by @psychedelic-ink (pre-outbreak) [multi] Strawberry Wine by @pedrito-friskito (pre + post outbreak) [multi] Take Care of You by theidiotwhowritesthings (pre-outbreak) [multi] ✨ Text Me, Texas by @alt-vera (pre-outbreak) [one-shot] Twenty Years Later by @yelena-bellova (post-outbreak) [multi]

SFW

Domesticity Looks Good on You by @girlscull (post-outbreak) [one-shot]

NSFW

Don’t You Dare Fall in Love by @ohcaptains (no outbreak) [one-shot]

SFW

Domesticity Looks Good on You by @girlscull (post-outbreak) [one-shot]

NSFW

Backseat of his Brother’s Car by @soulofapatrick (pre-outbreak) [one-shot] I’ll Have Another by @wyn-n-tonic (pre-outbreak) [one-shot] Stay In Bed by @psychedelic-ink (pre-outbreak) [multi]

SFW

NSFW Crave by @allfoolsinluv (no outbreak) [multi] Long, Long Time by @devnmon (post-outbreak) [one-shot]

SFW

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yournaothings · 3 months

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Shattered

((Ahem. A short story of human being saved by what they assumed was an angel; only to witness that this so called "angel" was anything but that. *No warnings, I don't think. Talk about Oc's universe/home being destroyed. Hopelessness, feeling of loss, comfort, then betrayal.

I did my best for Shattered Dream, like I had said in a previous post, I don't know much about him. I read the fandom wiki's to kind of help me out. So, possible OOC for him. Probably ooc for him. heh...

The story was inspired by lyrics from "Unbecoming" by Starset.

You found me drifted out to sea

It's automatic

It's telepathic, you always knew me

And you laugh as I search for a harbor

As you point where your halo had been

But the light in your eyes has been squandered

There's no angel in you in the end

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Enjoy the fic!

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"I hope you find your room to your liking. Good night, my starlight."

The room? It was more than I had expected. The large bed was comfortable, covered with silk sheets and a cozy warm comforter. The amount of pillows outnumbered the ones I had on my own bed at home. The rest of the room was very spacious, lined with a wardrobe, a vanity, a body length mirror, a bench that sat at the end of my bed, and in the wall in the middle of the room was a fireplace with a fire burning bright and warm.

The castle was cold and dark when Dream led me to my room. The only light was from the burning torches that sat high up on their holders on the walls. The light from the flames gave the environment a gothic and almost creepy feel to the halls. The fireplace in my room was a comfort for sure. The light from the flames of my fireplace was perfect, as well as the candle lights that sat all around the room. Even the connected bathroom had candle lights burning.

Being here made me feel like royalty. A better feeling than what had had only hours ago when I found myself without a home-

That's right. I no longer have a home. What did Dream say? My universe was destroyed and somehow, miraculously I survived and was thrown into the anti-void? The dull room? Plains? Whatever you want to call the boring, blinding place that is the "anti-void."

I was lost. Walking for hours, I think? I couldn't keep track of time. I didn't even know if it was day or night! My body was exhausted by the time Dream found me. I was lost, and so worn down that I had thought he was a hallucination. But then, he came to me as if he were an angel sent from above! Even though he was a skeleton.

His gloved hand held out while he gave me a brilliant, calming smile. His eyes are pretty gold, as was the circlet he wears on his head. His clothing made him look like an angel of sorts, though they didn't billow like you would see in the movies. But, the yellows were so vibrant, and the green or turquoise bordered the tunic he wore. The black under armor? Or maybe it was compression wear? Whatever it was, it was the perfect look for his outfit, making him look so regal.

I hadn't realized I was on my knees when he found me, dried tears caked to my face. When did I start to cry? It had to have been while I was aimlessly walking about the empty void. With hesitation, I took his hand and he pulled me to my feet, and oh, his voice was so majestic, so imposing.

"There, there. No more crying."

He settled my nerves, my sadness, my anxiety. He told me how he watched me break free from the destruction of my home and fell here.

"I'm sorry it took me so long to find you. Now that I have you, will you allow me to help you?"

I couldn't say no. Not when I had nowhere to go and no home to go back to. Going with him was the safest for me, the only way for me to get out of here.

"My name is Dream."

"Are you a guardian angel?"

He laughed softly at my question, his free hand gently covering his teeth, as if to hide his laughter. His pretty gold eyes shifted to look at me.

"Is that what you think I am?"

I nodded; of course I thought he was an angel! He saved me! His only response was a soft pleased hum as he guided me through a strange portal.

I slept so soundly throughout the night.

I felt so safe. Not even my nightmares could get to me. It was like Dream was protecting me physically and mentally. I knew I could stay here forever, or for as long as Dream allows me to stay. Somehow, I had to repay him for his kindness.

If only I had thought better of the situation when I had met Dream.

The next few days (at least I think it's been days) went by without a hitch. Dream continued to help me out. He conjured up new clothes for me- he must have gone out and bought them! Another thing on my list of things I needed to repay Dream for. The food was very delicious, and his company was soothing. We talked. (I talked to him, Dream listened.) We got to know each other! (Dream got to know my personality, my likes, my dislikes. My comforts and my fears.) Everything seemed to be going well, and I was so happy about it!

"How would you like to live with me?"

Dream finally asked, his elbows were propped up on the dining table and with his fists clenched, his chin rested on top of them. His grin was lazy, relaxed. His eyes were unreadable, but I didn't notice. I perked up and I could feel my lips widening into a grin.

"I would love to! I really like it here!"

Dream chuckled and leaned back in his seat. "Wonderful. I must throw a welcome party for you."

I raised an eyebrow as I finished my breakfast. "A party? You don't have to do that."

"Oh, but of course!" Dream said with enthusiasm! He stood from his seat and started to walk towards the doorway leading out of the dining room and into the kitchen. I grabbed my now empty dishes and followed after him. It would be rather rude to just leave them on the table! As I walk into the kitchen, fully intending on washing my own dishes, I paused and my grin faltered.

Dream walked over to three skeletons who looked oddly similar to Dream. I paused as I looked at each of them and frowned.

"What's going on?"

Dream turned to face me as he stood in between the grinning skeletons. His hands slipped behind his back and hooked together as he stood in a perfect, regal stance. His friendly grin was gone and was replaced with something more sinister looking. As my own grin fell, the skeletons' grins widened.

"We're going to throw a party for you, remember?"

I glanced at each skeleton, then at Dream.

"These are your friends?"

"you sure did pick a stupid one, shattered!" The one skeleton with what looked like a wriggling target on his front spoke with a snarky tone.

Dream hummed with amusement as he seemed to take great joy in my discomfort.

"A naive human, yes. But, they are perfect for what I have planned."

As he spoke, Dream's body shifted into something more grotesque, terrifying so. His body leaked with what resembled black tar that continuously dripped from his body. His left eye socket was covered by his goopy tar, and the right socket remained the pretty gold color I grew to love. I choked on a gasp when from his back four tendrils protruded out and hovered and wiggled behind him.

He pointed to his head, a sickening amused grin widening as his one good eye socket widened in mirth.

"Still think I'm an angel? There was never a halo, pet."

His once majestic voice was gone and replaced with something so dark and frightening. He was a nightmare.

"You tricked me. Into doing what exactly?"

I was hurt, betrayed. I thought he was my friend. I thought he was my savior.

"Anything that I desire of you."

"But, why?"

"Why do you think, pet? A lost soul in the anti-void? You should consider yourself lucky that I found you and not Error."

"I don't know who that is." I shook my head. It was then I felt myself trembling in fear. The dishes were still held tightly in my hands.

"Oh, you'll meet him eventually; and when you do, you can thank him for destroying your home."

My eyes slowly widened as he said this.

"H-He's one of your friends?" Dream's laugh was my answer. "Dream- why?"

"hehe! they're still calling you by that name?"

"his name... is shattered."

"you should be thankful he saved you."

"Heh. I suppose I should give introductions. These will be your friends. Killer, Dust, and Horror."

Drea- Shattered gestured to each skeleton. Killer was the one with the wiggling target, the black tears streamed down his cheekbones and stained his bones. Dust was the one with the mismatched eyes. Blue was what made up the middle, while the red bordered it. I could barely make out his grin. He wore a torn scarf around his neck. And finally, Horror was the big guy with a huge crater on top of his skull. A massive head wound and just below that was one large, nightmarish eye light. His clothing, much like the other two's clothing choice, was torn and bloodied. Horror was the perfect name for him.

I moved without thinking. My dishes fell from my grasp as I turned to run. Where the hell was I going to go? I never left the castle. I didn't even know where this castle was! But, the safest place I knew of at that moment was my bedroom.

"want me to chase after them?" Killer grinned as he summoned his knife.

"i can chop... off their feet." Horror snickered.

Dust grunted in disgust. No way was he running after that human, unless Shattered asked for him to do so.

"No. Let them run. There's nowhere to go. I will always know where they are from now on."

Shattered's laughter echoed through the halls, reaching the ears of the panicked human who was now a prisoner to Shattered Dream and his team of Bad Sanses.

#undertale #sans #dream sans #shattered dream #utmv au #picture not mine #killer sans #dust sans #horror sans #bad sanses #dream x reader #reader #shattered dream x reader

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sihtricfedaraaahvicius · 8 months

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A Dead Man & his Raven

Chapter 1

Note: happy spooky season! this fic is inspired by The Crow, Sihtric being based on Eric Draven. Song lyrics mentioned: Run Away From The Sun by VV.

Warning for entire series: 18+! angst/fluff. this story deals with death, losing a loved one, depression, suicidal thoughts/attempts (no details), murder (described), violence. There is also a lot of fluff, but you have been warned.

Warnings for this chapter: mention of drugs, attempted robbery, violence, murder (described), suicidal thoughts/attempts (not described).

pairing: Modern!Sihtric x you (f)

summary: You remembered your life with Sihtric, with a smile and a whole lot of tears.

wordcount: 3,5k

Masterlist

'I'm okay as long as you are okay.'

Prologue.

Sihtric shivered in the cold and pouring rain. Barefoot and shirtless, stumbling through the dark and deserted streets. His legs gave out underneath him after every few steps he took, causing him to fall down to his knees repeatedly, bruising his hands each time he caught himself. Wet strands of his shoulder length hair stuck to his pale, emotionless face, which carried remainders of mud, as did his bare, muscular arms and his toned torso. His tattooed fingers were bleeding, and his nails were short, dirty and broken.

Clawing your way out of a coffin and digging yourself up from the dirt looks easier in the movies.

For a dead man, Sihtric felt awfully alive right now, even his warm breath was visible in the cold night’s air.

A sick grin tugged at his lips when he remembered why he came back, exactly one year after he was murdered, in the very street he now stumbled through, making his way back home.

He came back because his soul had been unable to rest ever since. He came back because Odin had granted him some more time in the land of the living, to get his revenge on those who had taken his life away from him.

To take the lives of those who had taken his life with you away from him.

He came back because he loved you, and you never got to say goodbye.

The Proposal.

You drove down the highway, going home after yet another late night shift at work. The weather was terrible. Rain slammed against your window and you could barely see ahead of you in the dark night. You hated the late shifts, but they paid more, and you desperately needed the money if you wanted to be able to pay the rent for the loft you lived in. Friends and family had advised you to move out months ago already, to find something smaller and affordable, but you could never leave that place.

The spacious loft was your home, and it had been for many years. It was the home you had lived in with your late, underground gothic rockstar fiancé, Sihtric Kjartansson. He had been fortunate enough to make a decent living out of being a musician for a few years already, by the time you wanted to move in together, and you both fell in love with the loft during your first and only viewing of the place. It had two floors, a huge roof window and a balcony. It was perfect, and Sihtric had immediately transferred the downpay after the viewing. One week later you were painting the walls black and started to move your belongings into your dream home. The loft was also where Sihtric had proposed to you, on Halloween night, which would be exactly two years ago tomorrow.

In hindsight, his proposal had been reckless and dangerous; you could've burned the entire place down within minutes, and you were still amazed that it hadn't happened.

Sihtric, the hopeless romantic, had lit dozens of candles on the stairs, making for a trail all the way up to the huge second floor, which was only occupied with a bed and a few of his guitars, leaving a sea of space, which you both loved. And Sihtric had used that space on the second floor wisely, filling it entirely with candles and red rose petals, which were scattered out over the dark, wooden floor. When you came home late afternoon that day, after work, you were confused as to why the light switch didn't work, and you quickly walked out of the narrow hallway, through the door and into the dimly lit living room. You gasped and dropped your bag and keys as you stared at the countless candles in the loft, illuminating the high ceiling with a soft, orange glow. You were speechless, and Sihtric spooked you when he quietly snuck up behind you, covering your eyes with his big, warm hands. You jumped, but then laughed when you heard Sihtric's soft chuckle in your ear as he squeezed you in his strong arms.

'My angel,' he spoke softly, with his smooth voice.

His soft, smooth voice you loved so much, which had become harder and harder to recall as the months passed by since you had last heard it. You could always hear his voice if you'd listen to his band, but you never did. It was too painful.

After Sihtric had scared you and spoke in your ear, you turned around to find him shirtless, wearing only his black sweatpants and a black leather wristband that had your name on it, spelled out in runes, which he wore religiously every day.

'Darling,' you giggled, 'what is this? What happened to the lights?'

'I switched off the electricity,' Sihtric said, with amusement in his voice as his hands slid down to your hips, 'did I scare you?'

'You did,' you smiled, tucking his wild, loose hair behind his ear as he gazed down into your eyes with his own big, mismatched, love-filled pair.

'I'm sorry, my love,' he whispered with a half smile and pecked your lips, 'I just wanted to surprise you.'

'Surprise me?' you asked, squinting your eyes at him, 'what's the occasion?'

'Hm,' Sihtric hummed and bit down on his lip, smiling, 'the occasion being you,' he took your face in his hands, 'making me the happiest man alive,' he said, then kissed your lips, 'I love you, my angel, forever and ever and ever,' he chuckled, 'and even in death I will still love you.'

Before you could speak, he already lifted you up his arms and carried you up the stairs, where you felt breathless at the beautiful sight of at least a hundred burning candles, and an insane amount of rose petals scattered out, leaving only a small clear path to the bed. And above the bed, on the large, wooden shelf, Sihtric had placed even more candles. You already felt yourself tear up at just the sight and the thought of how much effort he had put into simply wanting to surprise you. And that was before you even knew that the big surprise wasn't just the romantic decoration, it was the proposal that would follow shortly.

'It's beautiful,' you whispered, after Sihtric had put you back on your feet, 'thank you, baby boy,' you kissed his cheek and earned a shy chuckle from your boyfriend, who had the biggest weak spot for any pet name you'd call him.

Despite his intense, vampiresque look, Sihtric was a very emotional and passionate guy, with a big heart and a delicate soul. All he wanted in life was to feel loved, but only by you. And he always said that the only thing he needed to breathe was to be loved by you, and to play guitar whenever he wasn't making love to you.

'Come,' Sihtric smiled as he took your hand, carefully leading you in between the flickering flames, towards the bed.

He took your coat off and threw it on the floor, nearly catching fire. Without him having to ask, you moved up on the bed. Sihtric was quick to follow, slowly crawling over to you like a wolf. And he leaned in, lovingly trapping your body underneath his own.

'My angel,' he breathed, his lips brushing lightly over yours, 'even if I had endless time with you, I still wouldn't be able to get enough of you.'

You smiled and closed your eyes when he kissed your lips, gentle and slow, allowing his tongue to carefully taste you and explore inside your mouth as his hands tangled in your hair.

'I will always want more of you,' Sihtric whispered, 'I'm a greedy bastard like that,' you both chuckled at his words, 'and I am greedy, because I want to be the only one who could ever own your heart.'

He smiled and sat back, reached into his pocket, then leaned in again, taking your chin gently with his fingers.

'My sweetest angel,' Sihtric whispered, and held a subtle but stunning ring up to you, 'will you marry me and be mine, forever and eternally, not even allowing death to do us part?'

You had managed to say yes in between your ugly crying and soft sobs, and Sihtric was an emotional mess all the same when he saw how perfect the ring he had picked fitted your finger.

'Do you like the ring?' he asked as he wiped a tear off his cheek.

'I do,' you sniffled with a smile, 'it's perfect. You're perfect.'

'Hm,' Sihtric smiled shyly, 'no, I'm not perfect,' he said, then took the black and white painted mask that hung above the bed, and he covered his face, 'maybe now, perhaps?'

'Also now,' you smiled, 'you're always perfect to me,' you said and took the mask out of his hands, 'but nothing beats that perfect face you so love to hide. I love you, Sihtric.'

He smiled and leaned in, softly brushing the tip of his nose against yours.

'Say that again?' he whispered.

'I love you,' you giggled as he climbed on top of you.

'I love you too, pretty baby,' Sihtric said, softly, 'I'm so fucking lucky to have you,' he kissed your lips and gazed into your eyes, 'make love to me?' he breathed.

'Hm, make love?' you taunted, 'we should wait till marriage now, don't you think?'

Sihtric frowned at you, and then you both snorted.

'I'm sure I can find someone to marry us early in the morning if that's the case,' he laughed and kissed you again. 'Come on, my angel,' he whispered, smiling softly as he cupped your cheeks, 'make a little love to me?'

And you did. You made sweet, passionate and slow love under the bright full moon, who was a witness to the intimate night as she peeked through the roof window. Your fingers curled in Sihtric's long and messy hair, while he leaned his forehead against yours, slowly bucking his hips into you. He looked at you with heavy-lidded eyes, and with each thrust, soft moans spilled from his slightly parted lips, which were curled into a soft smile.

And once you had both felt that pure bliss of your own highs, you cuddled up in bed. And as Sihtric tried to throw the sheets over your bare body, it accidentally caught fire as it reached the candlelit floor. He jumped up and managed to quickly slap out the small flame while you stared at him with big eyes. When Sihtric turned back to you, you started to laugh, and he was fast to bury his face in your neck, ashamed.

'I better extinguish the candles now, huh?' he mumbled.

'How will you do that without triggering the alarm, or simply suffocating us?'

Sihtric looked up at you, then at the insane amount of candles, and he chuckled shyly.

'Fuck,' he sighed, and tried to hide his face in your neck again, but you were quick to cup his cheeks.

'My hopeless romantic, clumsy boy,' you smiled and kissed his lips, 'you never fail to amaze me, good and bad.'

'Darling,' Sihtric grinned, 'you know who you just got engaged to, right? Your entire life will consist of me not always being the brightest guy. That's why I need you.'

'Maybe not always the brightest guy,' you shrugged, 'but definitely the sweetest,' you smiled and trailed your hands up his muscular chest, 'and the sexiest.'

'I'll take that,' Sihtric laughed softly, before he wasted almost an hour to snuff out each candle, without triggering the fire alarm.

You teared up at the entire memory as you drove home, and as if you weren't hurting enough yet, the radio station you were listening to started playing the last song Sihtric's band ever released, only one week before he died. You froze at the sound of his voice and the words he had written for you, which now tore your heart open and threw salt in your wounds.

Let me hold you

And dream of a life

We belong to another world…

You had to pull over to the side of the road as you couldn't drive safely anymore. The torturous pain continued as you just couldn't get yourself to switch off Sihtric's voice.

Run away from the sun, to me

Run away from the Sun, into my arms

Disappear with me, love

Dive into the dark…

You punched your fists against the passenger seat as you screamed and cried, asking over and over again why Sihtric was taken away from you, and why you were still alive, when all you wanted was to die.

And god knows you tried, numerous times, to join him in death. But each time you had tried to end your life, you had been startled and interrupted by a huge raven, pecking violently at your window, as if in panic, causing you to lose the courage to continue your attempt.

Devil's night.

The raven started to show up a few weeks after Sihtric was murdered right in front of you.

It happened the night before your wedding day, the night before last Halloween. You walked on the street together, his arm around your neck as your arm was circled around his waist, underneath his long leather jacket. Sihtric kept pecking your cheek lovingly, and stopped walking after every few steps you took together, so he could kiss your lips, and so taking forever to get home. The streets were already quite alive, as many people celebrated Devil's Night, causing havoc and mischief on the night before All Hallow's eve.

'Sihtric,' you giggled, after he had stopped you once again, to pick you up in his arms and push you up against the wall of a random apartment building, so he could kiss you and stick his tongue down your throat.

'What?' he chuckled and bit down on his lip, completely love-drunk, 'can't I kiss my soon to be wife?'

'You can,' you smiled and nuzzled his nose, 'but preferably at home, honey. We should get off the streets as soon as we can. I don't like being out during this night.'

'I know, my angel,' Sihtric whispered and gave you another soft kiss before he put you back on your feet, 'let's go then, love,' he wrapped his arm around you again and walked you around the corner, heading into the street the loft was located at.

And just when you did, you were greeted by a group of guys, clearly drunk and high on drugs. They eyed you up within a second and liked what they saw. The men started to whistle, soon followed by their catcalling, much to Sihtric's displeasure. Sihtric was very protective of you, which you loved, but he also knew that you hated it whenever he got into a fight because of it. And the last thing he wanted was to show up to his own wedding with a black eye or something of the likes. So he tried his hardest to ignore the disgusting words that were thrown at you, and he pulled you with him across the street, away from the men.

'Hey,' one of them hissed to his friends, unbeknownst to you, 'isn't he that guitarist and singer guy? That goth dude from that one band?'

And so they figured Sihtric must have some money on him, which they desperately wanted, as they ran out of drugs fast that night. Sihtric felt the group had followed across the street, and were now stalking the two of you in the night as you made way to your home.

'Stay close, angel,' Sihtric whispered as he tightened his arm around you, pulling you with him as he gradually sped up the pace you walked in.

You suddenly felt nauseous, as if you just knew something bad was about to happen. Sihtric felt the threatening tension too and already reached into his jacket, resting his hand on the dagger he always carried with him, hoping he wouldn't need it. But when he felt a hand on his shoulder while you were suddenly pulled out of his embrace, he didn't hesitate to stab the knife into the shoulder of whichever one of the drunks had just grabbed him. You screamed at the sight of the man collapsing, but still breathing, and you kicked your feet at the guy who had taken a hold of you. Sihtric punched your attacker in his face, pulled you back towards him and he shoved you behind his back.

'Leave!' Sihtric shouted, after which one of the men immediately ran away, knowing their planned robbery had spiralled out of control.

The rest of the guys seemed to slowly back off as well, as a few went to check on their stabbed friend, who would be fine eventually. Sihtric carefully pushed you to walk while he stepped backwards, keeping his eyes on the group. And when it seemed like the sudden violence and threat was over, he turned to you and took your face in his hands.

'Are you okay, baby?' he asked, 'are you hurt, love?'

'I-I'm not hurt,' you said as you trembled, and Sihtric wrapped his arms around you.

'Oh, darling, come here,' he hushed you with a kiss, 'I'm sorry this happened.'

'It's not your fault, sweetheart,' you said, and tears took over when the adrenaline left your body, 'but are y-you okay?'

'I'm okay as long as you are okay,' Sihtric smiled softly and wiped away your tears.

'Let's just go home, Siht,' you sniffled, 'I just want to go home with you, baby.'

'We will, love, we will go home now. I will always go home with you,' Sihtric said and kissed your cheek, 'I love you, my angel, forever,' he kissed your lips softly, 'forever, and ever and ever and even in death,' Sihtric chuckled softly, 'I love you so much, angel. I can't wait to make you my wife tomorro-'

A sudden gunshot startled you, echoing through the night and scaring birds out of their trees, cutting off Sihtric's words while you felt wet, warm drops splatter across your face. Sihtric lost his grip on you as blood suddenly gushed down both sides of his head, onto his cheeks, down his neck, and he immediately fell backwards, down on the hard, concrete ground, where you saw his life leave his mismatched eyes as he instantly died.

Once you realised what had happened, you fell down to your knees. Your trembling hands moving over Sihtric's lifeless body as his blood pooled around you, soaking your clothes. You brought your hands to the fatal wounds, desperately trying to stop the bleeding, as if it could still make a difference.

'No, no,' you whispered, 'Sihtric,' you grabbed his shoulders and shook him, 'Sihtric, wake up. Please.'

You sat back when he didn't move, raking your blooded hands through your hair, pulling your locks as you felt a certain kind of madness crawl into your body, settling in your bones. With eyes painfully wide open, you stared down at the man you were supposed to marry in less than 24 hours.

'Siht,' you said softly and let out a sob as you leaned in again, 'baby, please. Please wake up,' you kept trying and took his face in your hands again. 'No, no, no,' you breathed, 'come back, love, please. I- I love you. I need you here, baby, please!'

Your tears blurred your vision and fell down on Sihtric's pale face, merging with his still warm blood, and in your slow approaching insanity, you kissed his lips and face all over, while you kept begging him to wake up.

This wasn't real. This couldn't be real. This is not what was supposed to happen.

You were supposed to grow old with him. To marry him, to travel the world with him and to eventually have kids with him. You were supposed to make love with him, for hours on end. You were supposed to laugh at his silly jokes and his clumsiness. You were supposed to smile and blush whenever he let you hear another song he wrote for you, or when he'd read you a poem he wrote for you, in which he'd always declare his undying love for you. You were supposed to go home together that night, where you had planned to get in bed and make sweet love under the clear, starry night, which you would gaze up at through the roof window afterwards, when you'd cuddle and whisper sweet nothings to each other.

But instead of all those things, you started to scream beyond your control, you didn't even know such inhuman sounds could leave your lips as you screamed at Sihtric to wake up.

'You can't leave! You're not supposed to leave me yet!' you sobbed, 'you're supposed to come home with me! Please!' you wrapped your arms around him as cops and medics came rushing in the street, which had been warned by a bypasser.

You held Sihtric's heavy, lifeless body tightly in your arms as you screamed and cried, until the medics tried to pull you away.

'No!' you cried and fought them off, 'he is supposed to go home with me! He- he said he would come home with me!'

taglist: @clairacassidy @finanmoghra @uunotheangel @hb8301 @bathedinheat @neonhairspray @anaeve @bubblyabs @travelingmypassion @sylasthegrim @bubbles-for-all-of-us @andakth @bel-bottoms @willowbrookesblog @lady-targaryens-world @skyofficialxx @diosademuerte @elle4404 @alexagirlie @sweetxime @solango @gemini-mama @cheyennep3107 @little-diable @jennifer0305 @drwstarkeyy @mrsarnasdelicious @verenahx @urmomsgirlfriend1

#sihtric x reader #sihtric x you #sihtric kjartansson #the last kingdom #sihtric #sihtric fic #the last kingdom fic #tlk #tlk x reader #tlk fanfic #sihtric kjartanson

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basilpaste · 1 month

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Stress Relief

(This fic talks a lot about death and panic attacks! Stay safe!)

this takes place directly after On Command! Read that first for context.)

You feel Loop's eyes on you the moment you're back. Burning into you like sunlight caught in a magnifying glass.

Your heart stutters in your chest as you struggle to catch your breath. That's a downside to doing things like this, then! Just because you loop doesn't mean your brain gets the memo. You force yourself to your feet, hand on your chest as you breathe deeply. You're okay! It's better than dying. Better than having to run for a tear and the sleepless dreams they bring.

Okay. Okay! You can learn to recover faster if you do it more! If you do it more! Who knows if you'll need to! But it's nice to have the option.

You still feel kind of shaken, but you'll put on a brave face. The worst of it is over.

You go through the motions, following the pattern as always. You think maybe Sif realizes something is wrong! But if they do they don't tell you. A part of you wonders if they think you'll tell them yourself. Would you have? Before this started?

… You don't think you want to answer that.

By the time you make it back to the favor tree, you're feeling a lot better! It helps that you're trained to stay calm under stress, but you also had plenty of time to cool down! So you're okay. And if you're not now, you will be! You'll be alright.

You shuffle over to your usual place on the roots and offer Loop a wave, "Hi, Elle!"

They. Don't say anything. They just look at you. None of the usual preamble. Loop just looks at you, eyes clouded over with more emotion than you've ever seen in them. They grip their arm so tight that you can see it leaving indents in their skin.

"Um." You look away from them.

"Fighter." They say after a long time. "You looped back."

"I… did, yes."

"Without a tear."

You suddenly envy Sif's ability to hide his face under a hat and cloak. You feel almost painfully exposed like this, with Loop's eyes boring into you. Their gaze stings.

"Without a tear." You agree finally.

And then they look mad. They look genuinely, aggressively, mad at you.

"What in the name of the stars do you think you're doing?!" They shout, jabbing a finger towards you accusatorially.

Despite yourself, you jerk back.

Wasn't it obvious? You kinda thought it was obvious! This was… a good thing! A way to loop without having to find tears or die!

"I figured… that if I can loop based on my emotions, it's for a reason, right?" You stare at the ground between the two of you, "If I can do that, it means I can use it!"

"So— so what, then! What! You. What did you even do, Fighter?!" They sputter.

You dig your nails into your palms, "… I mean. You saw, didn't you?"

"I saw! Oh, yes, I did see!" They shoot you a glare, "I don't understand, though! So! Walk me through it, Fighter! What. Did. You. Do?"

"It's emotions, right? Um. Not always. But… sometimes. If I feel bad enough or guilty enough. Like— like I can't go on."

They know this. They know this! You had an entire theory-crafting session where you learned this! There's something in the emotions, the feeling like things are over, that can make you loop!

They know this.

They haven't said anything.

"So I figured I could. Use that, maybe? If I felt, I dunno, hopeless enough. I thought I could make myself loop back." You shrug loosely, "… and I could."

"Why." Their voice shakes with it.

"It's better than dying!" You say quickly, "Better than dying! And it can be quicker than finding a tear. Less risk of worrying everyone!!"

"Why do you care? It's not like they'll remember! You'll just be looping back anyway!" Loop's voice travels up, becoming something high and sharp.

"It matters!" You counter.

"Does it?"

"It does!" You fold your arms over your chest, "It doesn't matter if they don't remember! Because I do! I don't want to see their horrified faces as I die or fling myself into a tear! Not ever again!"

You take a deep breath. You shouldn't shout.

"… Why do you care." You ask.

It's a terrible thing for you to ask. Cruel and mean and aggressive. You're mean, Isabeau. In this moment, you're mean.

"Hah!" They spit the laugh out like venom. "That's a funny question, Fighter. Because it has the same exact answer!! BECAUSE YOU WILL REMEMBER!!!"

They. Yelled at you.

Actually yelled at you, genuinely shouted. Have they ever done that before? They've raised their voice a few times, sure, but none of it was actually yelling. They look… scared.

"It's a better option." You tell them. You believe this. You have to.

"It's not!" They argue, "It really, really, isn't!"

"Why not?"

"Because — because I don't want you to!!" Loop shouts.

And then they still. They look away from you, trying to collect themself, "I mean. Because you shouldn't have to."

"I shouldn't have to do any of this." You say quietly, "It's a bad situation, right? And I shouldn't have to do this at all. But I'm here, and I can't get out if I don't try, Elle. And that means doing new things."

"Fighter." Their voice wavers. "You… understand what this will do to you, right? If you do this to yourself? It's. Dragging yourself to your lowest just to loop, it can't possibly be good in the long run."

You do your best to smile, your teeth clack together harshly. "Well!! I'll just have to make sure I don't have to loop again, right?"

"No." They shake their head once, firm, "I need for you to tell me that you understand. Or else I will not let you do this."

"You're not really able to do much in the House." You say.

And it's mean. Of course it is. But you need to have this out! So none of your friends see you hurt! You don't want to force yourself to loop like that, but it's better.

Loop brings their hand up to their face, flashing the hand sign they taught you. Their eyes narrow on you, sharp and dangerous. Like a dagger.

[I will yell in your mind until you're too distracted to continue. I will not let you do this unless you tell me that you understand.]

You're not stupid. Not like everyone assumes you are. Of course you understand. But it doesn't matter if you feel bad! As long as you protect your friends, as long as you keep your family safe! If you ruin your own mind trying to save them from this, that's okay! And if it's not it will be!

You'll make it okay!!!

"So?" Loop asks, aloud this time.

They couldn't stop you, you don't think.

And isn't it kinda nice? To feel all those things instead of choking them down? To just freehand something instead of following all the steps? If you never feel any emotion other than good ones it's bad! Like — what was that comparison you all made — eating your favorite food all the time!

Feeling bad can. Be good. This is easier than dying.

"I understand." You say eventually, "I know what might happen to me. But. I'm going to keep it in my back pocket. Just in case."

Elle looks impossibly sad. "Sunlight…"

You don't think either of you want to continue this conversation.

"..." They breathe out, putting on a smile, "What can I do for you on this wonderful new loop?"

#in stars and time #in stars and time spoilers #isat spoilers #isat fanfic #in stars and time fanfic #isabeau isat #loop isat #of stitches in sequence #basil writes #slaps the roof of osisa. this bad boy can be. doing So Bad.#i started writing this the day after i finished on command and then i got. distracted.#but its done now!!! so!

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wttcsms · 1 year

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hopeless, breathless, burning slow, masterlist ; rin itoshi

in the middle of trying to embrace the new “real and messy model” facade your publicist keeps pushing upon you in order to get you into the good graces of the masses, you might take it a step too far. in your defense, nothing is more real than still hopelessly pining after a boy who has 1) already broken your heart more than once! and 2) definitely does not like you the way you like him. the messy side of things? he’s also your friend with benefits. except, you’re pretty sure the two of you aren’t friends, so he’s technically your ex with benefits. yeah, how’s that for “real and messy”?

COMING SOON! pairing rin itoshi x f!reader content contains/will contain timeskip/pro athlete!rin x nepo-baby/model!reader, strangers with a history, second chance (more like fourth chance) romance, almost high school sweethearts (y’all have been doing this situationship shit for years lmao), fwb to lovers, rin AND you are both ass at feelings, eventual smut, jealous&protective!rin, depictions of panic attacks, mentions of dead parent, more to be added word count tbd... (estimated to be ~50k, subject to change)

one / two / three / four

track list ! side a: honeymoon avenue, ariana grande / death by a thousand cuts, taylor swift / mirrorball, taylor swift / a lucid dream, verite / worth it for the feeling, rebecca black / if i weren’t me, katherine li / damage you still do, mikayla pasterfield / things i wish you said, sabrina carpenter / monster, lady gaga / fake smile, ariana grande / delicate, taylor swift side b: shameless, camila cabello / good looking, suki waterhouse / heartless, the weeknd / die for you, the weeknd / congratulations, mac miller / search & rescue, drake / kiss it better, rihanna / as it was, harry styles / nothing’s gonna hurt you baby, cigarettes after sex / afterglow, taylor swift / daylight, taylor swift

author’s notes

[apr. 10, 2023] hello!!! starting towards the end of the month/early may, i plan on having the final drafts of both of the first acts completed 🤭 this originally started as a one shot with the basic premise of “5 times rin itoshi breaks your heart + the 1 time he gives you his” but i had so much fun writing the one shot that it grew into a monster entirely of its own accord & i gave in and made some adjustments in order to better suit it :) now it’s a multipart fic! spoiler: rin still breaks your heart. several times. </3 but while writing the original one shot, i realized that rin’s heart had been yours/the reader’s the whole entire time!!! so, this fic explores you & him maturing + realizing how to properly communicate your feelings. i think the whole point is that it doesn’t matter if you love someone if they can’t feel it.

#rin itoshi x reader #rin itoshi x you #itoshi rin x reader #itoshi rin x you #rin itoshi smut #itoshi rin smut #bllk x reader #blue lock x reader #bllk imagines #one shot #drabble #lemon #fluff #angst #series: hopeless breathless burning slow

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atinylittlepain · 1 year

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Sunday Digest - fic recs!

it's that time again y'all - here's some writing that's pretty rad :)

@loquaciousferret has a lovely Din Djarin fic called Riduurok - it's angsty, it's sweetly sad, but mostly sweet, and it made my heart do lil flips

if you aren't reading @tightjeansjavi Burning In a Hopeless Dream fic, what the heck are you doing? such good joel miller writing, y'all, get on it

for those with a taste for dark!joel, @toxicanonymity writes some wicked good smut - defcon level one on the depravity scale, in the best way

@joelscruff has a joel fic called don't think we could help it - goddamnnnnn it's just so perfect

@theidiotwhowritesthings has an awesome Din Djarin two-parter called In a Perfect World, You Love Me - a really unique angle and so well written!

@pedgeitopascal has a joel series called A Safe Haven that is brilliant and heart breaking and lovely and I cannot wait to see where it goes

that's what i've got for this week, much love for these writers and their work!!

#fic recs

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shares-a-vest · 3 months

Text

He's Gonna Save Me, Call Me 'Baby'

wc: 1.1k | Rated: T for alcohol consumption (not excessive) | cw: post-breakup, angst with a hopeful ending

Tags: Future Fic (mid-90s), Post Stancy Breakup, Steve Harrington Angst, Angst with a Hopeful Ending, Platonic Stobin, Jeff (Stranger Things), Eddie Munson, Corroded Coffin, Implied Future Steddie (only bc the end is a little vague)

Written for the @strangerthingswritersguild Hozier Project. I chose the song, 'Jackie and Wilson'. Thank you soooo much to @subbaculture for setting up this event and making the banner!

(Read on ao3)

“Look alive, Dingus.”

Robin turns around to Steve and pats him square in the chest. He perks up, even though his best friend turns straight back to the entryway of The Hideout to wave at Jeff. He thinks it would be easier if Robin’s head were on a literal swivel with the way she has been whipping back and forth for the past hour.

Steve grumbles into his beer, pushing through the burn in his throat that still lingers years later as he laments the lack of Eddie following behind his bandmate.

He knows they had arrived too early for Corroded Coffin’s show, but Robin’s summer break from teaching came just in time – sue him for needing to spend every possible moment with his best friend.

Though he’d decided as soon as Robin announced her return to Hawkins that he wouldn’t mention the flowers he ripped up in haste in the back garden last week.

He’d done so straight after arriving home from the real estate agent, head hung in shame as he fully accepted yet another hard thunk on the head courtesy of Nancy Wheeler.

Well, it wasn’t so much a thunk this time as it was what Steve might consider, ‘divine intervention’.

He was in the backyard, tending to his small and still very much intact flower garden when a piece of guttering fell clean from the house, smashing through the window of the spare bedroom Nancy was using as her office – a room they’d falsely promised each other would be used for an entirely different reason.

But, much like his childhood home (which endured a mighty crack right through that cursed goddamn pool during Spring Break of ‘86), Steve found himself existing in a not-so-perfect house. One that grew increasingly cold as years of Upside Down dust and fog and smoke cooled Hawkins’s atmosphere.

A house that, with a broken and rusted gutter pipe, decided to remind them that shouldn’t – couldn’t – be playing house.

That’s all it really was: a pretend white picket fence dream that isn’t what Steve had meant by his vision of vacationing with a brood of Harringtons, Nancy by his side.

A dream that Nancy never wanted and got dragged into until her office window smashed in.

A dream that Steve thought was dead and buried the day Nancy rightfully picked through shards of glass for her things and left.

Buried until Eddie called him, saying that he had been talking to Robin (because of course, they kept tabs on him). He said the band would be back in town and that Steve and Robin should meet them.

And so, with a few beers warming his belly, burning his throat and sending a prickling sensation up his scar-covered sides, Steve found that nagging hope bubble up again.

He shakes his head, scoffing at his hopeless self as the sound of rhythm and blues music over the bar’s jukebox almost drowns out Jeff’s and Robin’s chattering.

Maybe he should be talking himself out of it. Finally acknowledging that years-old fleeting something between him and Eddie.

But he wants it.

And Lord knows he acts on a mere fleeting feeling.

Maybe history won’t repeat itself this time. Maybe the rusted gutter was one last divine thunk.

Maybe it won’t just be a first date. Or meaningless sex. Or bullshit.

He should have known that love with Nancy – a love long sucked down his old pool drain along with Barb Holland’s life – couldn’t prosper in the aftermath of an almost apocalypse.

They thought they were supposed to try, is the thing.

Staying in Hawkins. Keeping things at bay. Watching. Perhaps waiting for it all to come back.

But then it didn’t.

It all just lingered.

And they were left to pick up the pieces.

Right mistakes.

Move on.

They just didn’t need to do it together.

Steve pivots on his barstool, leaning an elbow on the bar top to get a better (hopefully seemingly more casual) view of the entryway.

He has seen Eddie over the years. Every Christmas at the Hendersons, sporadic visits home, a phone call here and there. The band hadn’t exactly made it big – at all, really. But they made enough to move around. Tour. Always returning to The Hideout for a one-off Tuesday Night gig as if nothing changed.

Steve looks around, thinking there might be three more drunks than the last show –

And there he is.

Eddie enters the bar with Gareth and George in tow and Steve swears a summer breeze flows in with him.

He looks good. Leather-clad as always. Pants impossibly tight. Jacket chains jangling. His hair still a river of wild curls.

But Steve sinks back on his seat as the trio makes a beeline for the stage, Eddie’s bright eyes turning into a dark frown as he orders the boys about, barely carrying a thing himself.

He probably had some theatrical excuse about his outfit, punctuated by manic hand gestures and a pout or two.

Steve watches as they dump their equipment by the one-step platform, each maneuver creating cacophonous thuds that reverberate through the bar. Jeff grimaces at the sight before shooting an apologetic glance at the manager and barkeep. The boys always did saddle him with sweet-talking the staff.

“Someone’s eager,” Robin teases, catching Steve’s smirk.

Jeff quirks a brow and stifles a smile.

“Shut up,” Steve chuckles into his glass before he downs the last of his beer.

“Eddie is really excited to see you, man,” Jeff nods, offering a nonchalant shrug just as Eddie begins making his way towards them.

Steve’s heart quickens.

There’s that something.

A something that is reflected in the glint in Eddie’s eyes as he smiles wide and waves.

Steve wiggles his fingers in greeting, shaking his head at himself almost instantly causing a lock of his hair to flop out of place.

George not-at-all subtly drags Gareth in Jeff’s direction.

“Over here, Gare,” Robin commands loudly through gritted teeth.

“Hey, Steve,” Eddie says, his voice low as he steps forward to stand just close enough that yeah, Steve decides to roll with that hope again.

He reaches up to comb a hand through his hair but Eddie gets there first.

“Sucks about Wheeler, babydoll,” Eddie continues, allowing his fingers to scrape his scalp, carefully looking him over as he does so.

Eddie always is too much.

Everything.

A lot. All at once.

Seeing him.

Steve hums and Eddie soon stops, an embarrassed set of dimples dotting his cheeks as he likely thinks better of it given their current location.

“It was... all a mistake,” Steve admits, taking Eddie’s retreating hand.

He intertwines ring-adorned fingers with his own, refusing to let go of the hope tethering them, ready to start again.

#okay so this one is really different for me and... idk how i feel about it tbh 😅#steve harrington #steve harrington angst #stancy #steddie #stranger things #lily writes a fic #stwg #steve harrington fanfic #stwghozierproject #tw alcohol

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