#blart blart blart blart blart blart
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What the fuck did my wife just send me
#paul blart#mall cop#taul blart#blart mart#till death do us blart#blart#blart blart#blart blart blart#blart blart blart blart blart blart#blart blart blart blart blart blartblart blart blart blart blart blartblart blart blart blart blart blartblart blart blart blart blart blar
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Soon.
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its so funny how every till death do us blart episode starts with “hey gang? I hate this, can we stop this?” and then they don’t because they’re all binding each other in some sort of sisyphean crab bucket hellscape of mediocre film watching. like it doesn’t have to be this way but no one can pull the trigger
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The secret life players are all in different genres of show I just don't know what everyone is yet
Mumbo is obviously having his summer romance, Joel's up to some looney tunes shit, Scar's having a court drama, and BigBs in a psychological horror
#trafficblr#traffic series#traffic smp#secret life smp#joel smallishbeans#bigb#goodtimeswithscar#mumbo jumbo#i would like to emphasize that i have never watched paul blart mall cop but based on my limited knowledge of it#whatever that is is what jimmy and martyn are up to#inthelittlewood#solidaritygaming#< in the tags#my very own post
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Not today, Death
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What if you listened to the adventure zone balance all the way through except instead of listening to suffering game, you replaced it with the entirety of til death do us blart, then continued
#sierra speaks#based on justin saying something about wishing paul would suffer more#taz balance#til death do us blart#mcelroys#the adventure zone
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#sierra speaks#deathblart#death blart#til death do us blart#mcelroys#someone has def done this one before but idc
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People need to remember that your blog is... well yours. You could post sexy onceler or whatever and nopony can complain because it's your blog and you can draw sexy onceler and post it whenever you damned please. For example you could draw sexy onceler pregnant tomorrow and tell people to kick rocks.
well,
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Sexiest Podcast Character — Unscripted Bracket — Round 1
Propaganda
Pickman (Friends at the Table: Sangfielle):
She's a middle aged knight who is also a cowboy if the dragons/horses were evil and/or haunted and/or cursed trains! She went to (evil?) heaven and hated it BUT she was beloved by all the queer artsy women around. When she was a kid she got kidnapped by a train and lived on it for like 15 years before getting out and joining the people who kill trains. She has zero social skills, zero patience, zero charm, but she's SO hot and gruff and no nonsense and she Looms to be supportive
massive goat woman wearing armor made from the bones of a sentient train. kinda person to run a mcdonalds like it's the navy. went to heaven and said "fuck this, actually," invented pointillism and introduced evil fucked up trains to heaven and left. butch icon love of my life
SHE’S A GIANT BUTCH GOAT LADY WHO WEARS KNIGHT ARMOR MADE OF TRAIN PARTS AND HUNTS TRAINS THE WAY KNIGHTS HUNT DRAGONS. SHE’S ALSO A COWBOY. AND HAS A BIG GUN. SHE SPEAKS IN SENTENCES 10 WORDS LONG OR FEWER AND ROLLS HER OWN CIGARETTES.
She's butch, she's a knight, she has a big gun, she once convinced a skeleton to give her his sword
you used multiple fatt examples in your intro, so I assume you already Know
massive butch goat woman with a gun
HOT EMOTIONALLY DISTANT BUTCH GOAT TRAIN-KNIGHT
she's a goat! she's tall! she has a gun but doesn't know what a ranged weapon is! she's so autistic! AND she won my sexiest friends at the table player character tournament, she absolutely deserves to win this one too!!
Pickman is a big butch goat woman who smokes and fights supernatural trains. Self-explanatory
Have you seen her.
Giant butch goat knight who kills trains. The perfect woman.
She s so sexy shes a goat lesbian.please.
ITS PICKMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
she's a gruff muscular goat woman who hunts trains and wears train armor, she's perfect butch husband/wife material
“Ah, that sexy trains podcast character” “You mean that sexy trans podcast character?” “🐐no🚂”
The Shadow Man ('Til Death Do Us Blart):
The Shadow Man is a conjectured entity found in the gaps of the script of Paul Blart Mall Cop 2 who seemingly exists to torture Paul Blart, Kevin James, the viewer, and particularly the podcast hosts. The closest to a canonical appearance we have is the pianist during the bird fight scene, but the Shadow Man's reach surely extends to every scene and every Blart watching experience.
#Round 1#Pickman#Ernestina Pickman#The Shadow Man#Friends at the Table#Sangfielle#'Til Death Do Us Blart
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A BIG STICKY MESS
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The Permit Office Enforcers (the poepoe) here for duty!
I need a kinda workplace based comedy based on these 2 + Grian! I like to think he has weekly meetings with them about what constitutes as appropriate workplace attire before completely giving up
#hermitcraft#gtws#gtws fanart#my art#hermitcraft x#skizzleman#skizz fanart#completely and shamelessly inspired by Paul Blart mall cop
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youtube
Til Death Do Us Blart 2023
#death blart#mbmbam#mcelroys#guy montgomery#tim batt#twioat#til death do us blart#tumblr 'sclusies#Youtube
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in paul blart mall cop 2, it is revealed that the BBEG has an oatmeal allergy. it is the lynchpin in the story that allows blart and his daughter to defeat him. this is stupid and makes no fucking sense. but heres the thing. this could easily be fucking fixed and made to make sense if they just changed one detail.
it is established that paul blart needs a bowl of peanut M&Ms in his room to help him deal with his hypoglycaemia. this sets up his condition but it could also serve as a chekov's gun. just establish that the BBEG is allergic to peanuts, and has an ACTUAL ALLERGY THAT IS DEADLY instead of making up an oatmeal allergy that is triggered by,,, oatmeal face cream?? a thing that does not exist and was never addressed a single time in the movie until it was used? just have paul keep some peanut M&Ms in his pockets and then hes good. im freaking the fuck out about this how am i a better writer than the people who wrote the script for paul blart mall cop 2
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wine stream will have you when nobody else does
#look at themmm!!#this edit is so Instagrameditcore I coildnt help myself tho#reliable kings!!#til death do us blart is my thanksgiving treat#tntduo wine stream is my Christmas treat#my favorite annual nightmares#quackity#Wilbur soot#wine stream
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