Let me guess: You're "self-diagnosed"?

Lemme guess, you "Tell it like it is"?

Why are you even trying to act like this line of interrogation will change the course on how you view us? Just tell us what you think you know about us better than our therapist, say that psychology is a lie, and bounce.

☄️🏌‍♂️

To everyone else, I could post a nice official-looking doc to have the own on Random Harasser #91. Buuuuut the fact is that the process of getting diagnosed costs hella money and having it on your record can fuck you up on judgments and custody battles and such, and people like this will still treat you the same. Nothing I say, from posting documented proof, to having my therapist call them and sing my dx's to the tune of Old McDonald is going to stop this person from harassing people living their lives with mental illness.

If you're thinking about putting yourself through that just to stop being fakeclaimed, don't. People see us a few steps above being institutionalized and think they've been bamboozled lmaoooo

-Sparrow 🧷

[ cw: death mention / family death mention / ]

Mhmm I sure love thinking of the reality where we did get more time to really know Karai and her dynamics with the bros. Losing her hit hard in the finale, but it would’ve hit much, much harder had we known Karai longer and really saw her relationships develop with everyone.

I especially would have been interested in her dynamic with Leo, as past iterations often have the two of them clash in ideals and the like while still sharing many characteristics. Two sides of the same coin, and all that. Her specifically being the bros’ Gram-Gram also adds a whole new dynamic as well.

Imagine how interesting it would be, to have Karai start off on Leo’s side for once, showing wholly just how alike the two are at their cores and bonding as family without the worry of betrayal or animosity that other iterations suffer through, only to have Karai die anyway. Their parting hug and the desperate look of horror Leo wears later on would have hit that much harder, I feel.

don’t get me wrong I think the general interpretation of Leo being like “I put up a cocky front but deep down I don’t actually think I’m that great and that’s why I have something to prove” is good. It’s cool, plenty of drama/angst potential and probably what the creators were going for, I’m here for it.

But there is a distinct appeal to me of the slightly-to-the-left interpretation of Leo being like “it’s not a front, I know I’m that good/smart/skilled, but I also know I’m seen by others as just the goofball face man and that’s why I have something to prove.”

I know we collectively agree that Hiccup isn’t romantically inclined, and his getting married and having kids didn’t make sense in the epilogue, but consider: Hiccup getting married for political reasons.

It’s a marriage of alliance, which is recognized both by him and his partner, and they enter it without expectations of romantic involvement. Since they’re now married, they live in the same castle, spend time together, and Hiccup finds he really likes his spouse. They’re funny, get along with his friends, and has the same interests and values. They both probably speak multiple languages. She understands why Hiccup is so dedicated to making the Wilderwest better, and holds similar views. She’s a good politician (her job after all, was to be an ambassador). Hiccup likes spending time with them, and the feeling is mutual. They’re not in love, they have their own lives, but they’re dedicated to each other and eventually decide to raise children. They teach their kids how to train hawks and hunt with dragons, riding, history, the Languages, and all the necessary skills of their world. They’re not in love and they’re happy together.

I’m wondering (and not sure if this has been talked about yet in a post I simply missed) about how Abram copes with Andrew’s physical affections (or lack thereof) in your lovely royal AU. With the history behind ‘pretty’ that you described for Abram in that last post, I feel like there is so much potential of him expecting to be touched, even before they are courting (but especially during/after), and wondering why Andrew doesn’t—especially once it’s established that he thinks of Abram as ‘pretty’. They are of different station so it would be so easy for Andrew to act entitled to Abram’s body like so many before, especially with Abram in a position where he’s basically serving him in some way. I wonder if it makes him relieved (due to professionalism/personal comfort at the very beginning) or anxious (due to having no ability to tell what is coming for him/later due to doubting if he is really wanted that way if Andrew doesn’t act the same as his point of reference) or a little bit of both for different reasons.

I imagine Andrew to be both a very tactile person and not necessarily so because he is so very aware of boundaries and only crosses them with invitation or purpose. I wonder how that translates here and how his touch plays into how Abram perceives him (and honestly there’s the whole part too where it’s something they have in common, trampled boundaries and bad associations and bone-deep understanding of such) or if they would ever have a conversation about that where Abram wonders about the curtesy of distance and space he is being given.

I’m like two seconds from passing out bc it’s pretty late here so idk how much sense this ask really makes but I’m having thoughts. I love your AU and your work and hope you have a wonderful day <3

YOU GUYS ALWAYS FIND THE MOST INTRIGUING THINGS TO EXPLORE I LOVE YOU (and your comments/etc, apostrophe-philosophy, are always a joy to read hehe)

(First: find the royal au writing masterpost here 💕)

I’ve been working on/thinking about this ask long enough that I’ve straight up forgotten if this was a thought I had when writing that first post (here) or if you brought it fully to my attention but we can safely assume it’s the latter so thank youuuuu for that truly. I love exploring Abram’s slow inch (and Andrew’s, but he’s had more time to get adjusted) towards finding a healthy relationship with touch 🥲 and oh my GOD don’t let me forget to tell all of you about Abram and gloves

I wrote a scene/lil collection of scenes about Andrew clearing things up here too because I’ve been wanting to explore Abram’s POV for a while 👀 there are references to canon abuse, so take care. As always, sparknotes version and additions below

I LOVE your points about Andrew, I totally agree that once it’s established and he’s allowed, he’s very much a tactile person, he just needs to get there first 💕

We all know for obvious reasons that it never once crosses the prince’s mind for Abram to be anything more than a professional bodyguard, even if he does find him attractive. He’s very good at courtesy and polite distance. How I imagine this goes down in the timeline is this:

1) Nathaniel shows up at Palmetto and he’s never allowed close to important people. Certainly never allowed close enough to touch. Totally safe there. It doesn’t take him long to understand Day really won’t take advantage of him since he never did in Evermore either, so that’s safe. There’s not much else to worry about for that long stretch of time.

2) Nathaniel/Abram becomes the prince’s guard. There’s probably a little anxiety just because there’s plenty of opportunities for the prince to try something, but as time goes on and Andrew keeps the previously mentioned distance, even acting apathetic (as he does), Abram starts to assume that the prince is straight/doesn’t care. It wasn’t as if every single person in Evermore was trying to get at him. Just the ones that wanted to. Obviously, the prince doesn’t want to. It gets to the point that Abram feels comfortable and doesn’t try to constantly watch his own back when he’s on duty.

Then the prince, perhaps feeling a little bold or hopeful or just wanting to say something so he doesn’t keep feeling like he’ll explode, makes a single comment on Abram’s “pretty face”. Even something that could be brushed off as friendly jest, if he really wanted. But Abram completely freezes up. Andrew, of course, notices. He doesn’t try to ask about it then, but he definitely notices. But he assumes that Abram took it as the genuine compliment it was, and that Abram is entirely uninterested or even wary of those advances. So he makes no more comments, he leaves the entire concept as far away as he can get it.

Now that Abram knows the prince finds him pretty, he’s just waiting for Andrew to be the same as everyone else. He didn’t even directly answer to the nobles in Evermore and they were still so bold - but he’s Andrew’s servant in the most direct way, and Andrew is a prince. Surely the prince is even more entitled to him than they were. (When he realizes this is what’s happening, Andrew tells Abram in no unclear terms exactly what is and isn’t expected of him. It takes longer than that for Abram to shake the anxiety he grew up with, but at least after that he can start repeating the prince’s words to himself when he needs to.)

3) that’s cleared up well enough, but then (much, much later) the prince wants to court him. At first Abram can’t think much beyond “there’s no way this is real” but then the more he thinks about it, the more nervous he gets again. He doesn’t know Palmetto courting traditions, what if he’s expected to do something he isn’t ready for. What if now that he’s accepted the courtship he can’t tell Andrew no anymore. It wouldn’t be fair of him to, he thinks, he shouldn’t have agreed so quickly.

But there’s a time they’re out doing whatever courtship things (maybe another horse ride for funsies idk), Abram’s getting nervous about it again, and when Andrew asks for a kiss or to hold his hand, Abram doesn’t answer. He’s also a little confused when Andrew doesn’t just do it anyway, because he hadn’t said no, but Andrew is watching him in the way that usually means Abram is acting too much like he’s at Evermore again. He tells Abram, “Nothing’s changed. You can say no.” And Abram does immediately - not because he doesn’t want whatever he was offered but because he scared himself. Andrew’s still watching him. “Don’t forget that again,” he says. Abram takes a shaky breath. “Yes, prince.”

But as soon as Abram’s past that anxiety for the second and probably final time? Andrew is still as tactile a person as before and gods know Abram is touch starved to hell and back, he’ll take any kind words or touches he can possibly get and he craves them. Specifically from the prince. Who loves to give them.

I’d love to come back and make a fluff post specifically about that point in the timeline if we can collectively come up with enough ideas for said fluff 🥰 for now thanks again for the ask, swear to GOD we’re gonna get these idiots a happy ending, but I’m having way too much fun in the meantime 😂

.

What are your thoughts on nettles

NETTLES!!!!!!!! I LOVE nettles she was one of my favorite parts of fire and blood for real. I think it’s so special that she was able to become a dragonrider with only the love in her heart and the sheep in her flock. like she befriended the dragon instead of claiming it!!!!! Best dragonrider ever, my favorite (alleged) targaryen, one of the only smallfolk mains we ever see i love that. When she shows up on hotd we will all be yelling and cheering

You have to have water fic titles because you're drowning in wips, huh?

:0

(On one hand i personally found this very funny and I did do a little huff huff of genuine laughter—)

(On the other hand I did do a little quick calculation, and over the 2 years I’ve been writing in this niche of a fandom, I’ve published 60 fanfictions on ao3 and of that 60, 48 have been completed, which leaves me with 12 work in progress fics on ao3—OUT OF 60!!!!!! 12 fics out of 60 that are works in progress !!!!!

12 !!!!! Out of!!!!! 60!!!!!!!!!!)

I gave her the trans armor, if you even care.

my visceral disgust/hatred towards men and my childhood desire to be ‘chosen’ by one are going to fight to the death later if anyone wants to come

I’ve always felt like my relationship with romantic love was so different from everyone else’s, in some ways I feel the same as when I was a teenager because it’s never felt like it could be fully real to me. I genuinely believe I have qualities of a loveable person but that I will never find someone compatible with me, like all the minimum conditions will never be met. And honestly the barrier of anxiety has always been higher than the reward of going on apps and dates after a month or so.

When I was in my one and only relationship years ago I really hoarded and treasured every little moment and nice thing because I thought I would never experience it again (and so far I’ve been right). Even though I don’t even miss that person and it was short, I’m happy that I treasured that little opportunity to experience what I feel like will never be real for the adult me. I want that kind of love but I never expect it to become real for me specifically.

what are the odds that the two most well known musical artists in the country would both release highly anticipated albums around april 2024 and i would listen to them both and go “good! but i thought i’d like them more” both times. and for some godforsaken reason post malone is there too

If you could relive any of your memories, which would it be?

Okay I really had to think about this and I’m a bit torn, but I’ve settled for one of the two memories that have been contending for first place. I’ll tell you both of them anyway.

The one that has NOT won first place is from 2021, me playing skribbl.in with my discord friends late in the night. I think this will always be one of my most cherished memories because I love skribbl.io, and I’m not allowed to stay up late and I had done it anyway (by sneaking), and my parents are constantly paranoid that I’ll end up talking to someone on the internet (I’m not allowed to speak to people on the internet. Which I do anyway. That’s the only way I can network as an artist who rarely goes out in public.) and getting whisked away and kidnapped and sold for body parts, so I was basically breaking a lot of rules that I didn’t agree with AND I was having a wonderful time with people that cared about me and listened to me and it’s yeah honestly such a cherished memory.

The memory that WON FIRST PLACE tho, is not so glamorous. It was in 2018, I think, and I was in India. I had twisted my ankle a few weeks prior to this memory, and it was raining as I was walking out from school to the bus. I was limping and I had an umbrella with flowers on it. These three guys (from school) behind me poked my umbrella and at first I thought it had been an accident so I ignored them, but then I heard them laughing at me. And making fun of my limp. I ignored them because I was limping and I couldn’t really do much if they all decided to get physical. But they actually followed me quite a ways and eventually they also started making fun of my British accent, and I was getting REALLY fucking worked up. I don’t actually remember what the trigger was, but suddenly I just turned around, limped over to the three guys, and just straight up punched them. They were just standing there while I limped over to them. The one that was in my class turned on his heel and ran in the opposite direction the moment I started limping towards them because he’s seen me in action but the other two guys just stood there like Tf is this little girl gonna do. So I went over, and punched them good. And the look on their faces? I want to see that look again. That day was the day I incited fear in guys from all across my year-group because until then it was only within my class. After that day no one bothered me again, everyone was respectful to me. I really really want to see that look again because the memory of their expressions has all but faded and I really want to just cement that into my brain to cheer me up with I’m feeling low and useless. Btw after I punched them and saw the look on their faces I just turned right around and headed for my bus and they didn’t follow. That adrenaline was coursing through my blood vessels and my heart was thrumming. I only processed what I’d done when I was sitting in the bus. It was a great feeling.

So yeah you’re welcome for the enormous answer.

So for some reason, I thought I would not have to do specialty-specific research to match pulm/crit, and that I could get away with exclusively having medical education scholarly projects. This was probably dumb of me, but I am nevertheless really unhappy to find out I was wrong. I just hate research man. I love science, I love digging into the literature and coming up with good questions and synthesizing information, but I hate performing analysis myself. I especially hate churning out shitty chart reviews and case reports just to pack my resume, and the thought of having to keep doing that during residency makes me wanna throw up. The vast majority of research done by physicians is utter trash (we do not have the time or training to complete meaningful research on our own most of the time!), it doesn’t improve physicians’ scientific literacy, it is just chasing prestige. I hate it. Please please let me work on a project that is actually meaningful.

Speaking of Shiina parents, do you think they'd have another kid? Like they come home one day and now Niki's a big bro

ill admit its not something ive thought about, ill say no because the thought of them having their own little family while they left niki alone depresses me shskdhsksg

it also reminds me of a character from like fire force i think where a kids parents go into debt so they make up that they’re going off to save the world and ditch their son….but then it turns out they were just in hiding and had like 3 other kids while this character thought they were off fighting evil and idolized them for it AND IDK IT JUST MAKES ME SAD? L

niki would probably laugh it off and be an amazing big brother but man it’s one of those moments where hes probably thinking oh i was a bother so that’s why they left me and had another son… :(