#barbarian greatclub
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episode 122: barbarian greatclub 🦃🍗🥓
#dnd#heroes feast#dungeonmeister#dungeonmeister cookbook#a finicky guide#a finicky guide to dungeonmeister#dnd cookbook#dnd cooking#dnd food#dnd recipes#dungeons and dragons#food comic#recipe comic#ttrpg#ttrpg recipes#chapter 2#class based creations#main course#barbarian greatclub#four dice
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Monster Spotlight: Sandman
CR 3
Neutral Evil Medium Outsider
Bestiary 2, pg. 236
These cruel elemental spirits are found most often in sun-bleached deserts, where their sandy forms are nearly impossible to differentiate from an errant dust devil or sand flow until they resolve into a humanoid form. Their lore leaves it ambiguous as to whether or not Sandmen exist at all when they're not being summoned into the Material Plane by an elemental binder, but once they've been formed, they're in no hurry to return to any sort of elemental quanta and will voluntarily remain in the plane they've been called into long after the spells binding them expire to continue wreaking havoc.
Why, exactly, Sandmen all seemingly possess a malevolence other Elementals typically lack, going out of their way to harass, terrify, and even kill other beings for amusement alone, is left unsaid. It may be that the nature of their creation instills a certain amount of misanthropy in them, or perhaps the "blueprint" for calling a Sandman into being comes with an unfortunate flaw built in. Perhaps, as their lore hints at, they're fiercely independent but malicious spirits who leap on the opportunity to gain a malleable body at the minor cost of temporary service. Whatever the case may be, Sandmen are dangerous entities to summon in despite their comparatively low CR, as no force or spell exists to bind them fully and completely to the will of the caster. Much like a bound demon, Sandmen will consistently find ways to maliciously interpret all but the most direct, thorough, and unambiguous orders, fulfilling their mission in ways which amuse and benefit them the most.
It's a pity that they're so damn handy despite the danger they present to their summoners. Their amorphous bodies and ability to shift back and forth between a strong humanoid form and a featureless mass of sand (in which they're treated as a Small Earth Elemental, becoming more fragile but gaining access to the immensely powerful Earth Glide) make them excellent spies, able to slither through the tiniest cracks or keyholes and swim effortlessly through anything but solid rock. Of course, if a summoner wanted an elemental spy, there's better choices... so Sandmen are typically used as assassins and kidnappers that are nearly impossible to keep away from their target, a task they excel at in chilling ways.
Just at base, a Sandman is far more resilient than they look. Sand isn't exactly hard to hit, but ask any child digging holes in a beachfront how easy it is to keep those holes empty when waves wash sand in from one direction and the wind blows even more in from another. The propensity for sand to flow in every direction it can get away with translates to DR 10/Bludgeoning, all but the largest of two-handed bladed weapons wielded by the burliest of Barbarians effectively useless against them (to say nothing of most ranged weapon damage at this level), but a single critical hit from a two-handed greatclub swing that passes by its 15 AC will scatter its 30 HP to the four winds... or it would, if Sandmen weren't both Elementals and Amorphous and thus immune to both Sneak Attack AND critical hits. Their shifting shapes also render them immune to being flanked, and their lack of any bodily systems makes them impervious to bleed, poison, paralysis, stunning, and sleep.
Take note of that last one.
While Sandmen are immune to being put to sleep, they're very adept at wielding sleep as a weapon for reasons unfathomable (if Golarion has equivalent tales of Sandmen putting children to sleep, they're likely far more gruesome than even the earliest tales we have on Earth). They're surrounded constantly by a cloud of soporific sand 20ft wide that causes any creature within it to fall soundly asleep if they can't succeed a DC 14 Will save; success renders the victim immune to the aura for 24 hours, but there is no 24 hour immunity clause against the Sleep effect caused by its slam attack. Being hit directly by the Sandman not only causes 1d6+3 damage, but forces another DC 14 Will save versus being put right into naptime. It, thankfully, can only attack once per round, but that's a cold comfort for the person receiving that one attack.
Any creature with a disabling aura is already one disastrous series of rolls away from ending combat the instant initiative begins, if not just forcing the party to waste their initial actions undoing the aura and ruining whatever plan they had, but the fact the Sandman can also potentially knock out anyone it encounters with a single punch means anyone who passes the initial aura save may STILL be rendered completely helpless! Its Sleep effects last for eight minutes, giving it enough time to take its pick of who to rob, who to coup de grace, and who to kidnap, putting the slumbering victims completely out of the fight unless their allies waste time slapping them awake.
Even if the hostile elemental isn't out to kill the whole party, anyone who survives the initial encounter will be several minutes behind the thing as it makes off with stolen loot and lives... and given their ability to burrow or even Earth Glide when needed, you may simply not get that stuff back until you track down the Sandman's summoner and beat it out of them.
I'm actually impressed that there aren't more low-level horror stories about the Sandmen; a group of them seems almost unfair for lower-level parties, given how the party has to make saves against each aura and each Sleep slam...
You can read more about them here.
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Poll: What weapon is Chris picking for his D&D character?
This madman has chosen to play as a lawful good half-orc barbarian... ok...
Just assume they all have the right weapon proficiency... and this is a homebrew. So there.
#resident evil#resident evil poll#chris redfield#d&d#dnd#dungeons and dragons#tumblr polls#polls are fun
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Baldurs Gate 3 joins Fallout 1/2 on the list of games where you can kill children, I guess. Accidentally clicked on that one tiefling kid with my fighter's pushing strike w/ a +1 greatclub and baseballed that little fucker into the feywild. Also, as with any other corpse, you can add them to your inventory, so in theory you could roll an evil 20 strength barbarian and just murder every child you see, pick up the body, *and then throw them at enemies*
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Tabaxi Barbarian Pompadour'd Delinquent
#cat#fantasy#greatclub#d&d#tabaxi#delinquent#pompadour#lynx-point#color#inkdrawing#dungeons and dragons#d&d tabaxi#d&d character#d&d barbarian
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idk if it's "against stereotypes" but I have a Goliath wizard who dresses in hides and uses a wooden greatclub as a spellcasting focus. her second highest stat is charisma, for the purposes of deception and performance, since she survives by convincing people she's actually a dumb barbarian, which is aided by the fact that her common isn't great because it's her sixth language. she doesn't have tribal tattoos, since she's actually from a Goliath civilization as opposed to a tribe, but she does have arcane runes tattooed e v e r y w h e r e
Oh, that definitely fits, the Archetypical Wizard(tm) is either unwilling or unable to play dumb ever. They are very smart, they went to magic school and learned magic, and they need you to know that. You know those wizardly robes all the classic wizards wear? That’s so they’re recognized on sight as Very Powerful Nerds. Also they’re probably too scrawny to even lift a greatclub.
-mod meme
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I recently had to put my baby boy, Whiskey, to sleep after a debilitating spinal injury. I'm giving him a memorial spot in the DnD campaign I'm writing as a helper NPC that helps run the "Hunter's Guild" side quest chain. I've also granted him a legendary greatclub that more or less equates to a "really good stick". His name is Jack "JJ" Jameson (to make a pun of Whiskey's name.) And he's a Totem Barbarian.
#rest in peace#whiskey#pupper#doggo#best boy#dnd#dungeons and dragons#d&d#barbarian#totem warrior#pets#heartbroken#german shepherd#furry#magic items#legendary weapon
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Neanderthal
Image © Wizards of the Coast, by David Griffith. Accessed at the Frostburn Art Gallery here
[I’ve wanted to cover WoTC’s take on Neanderthals for a while. They’re pretty cool, and pretty scientifically progressive for the time period. Neanderthals had art, culture and interbred with “modern humans”, and were just another way to be a person. Honestly, the fact that they did not survive into the modern day bums me out. As such, I removed the Int penalty they got saddled with in 3.5. I also added the wrestler ability, inspired by the discovery that most Neanderthal skeletons have breakage and healing patterns that resemble rodeo riders more than other modern professions. I also used this as an opportunity to convert, and simplify, some of the original weapons in Frostburn.]
Neanderthal
CR ½ N Humanoid
Although this burly man looks human at first glance, he is slightly too broad and barrel chested. He has no chin, a forward projecting nose, and a strong brow ridge.
Neanderthals are closely related to humans—in fact, the two species can interbreed, and most human populations carry a distant trace of neanderthal bloodlines. Although they are sometimes disparagingly called “cavemen” and derided as bestial, they are intelligent and skilled at making a living on marginal lands. They make art and artifacts, bury their dead, and have complicated religious practices. Most neanderthals are animists, and they view shapeshifting creatures with respect and awe. Their material culture is focused on tools of stone, bone and wood—neanderthals spend much of their free time crafting and repairing weapons and tools.
In combat, neanderthals are not terribly subtle, favoring overwhelming force and teamwork. Typically, one neanderthal warrior will grab an enemy and wrestle them into submission, while their allies assist by attacking the grappled opponent. Most neanderthals have multiple broken and healed bones by the time they reach adulthood. They tend to be clumsy with ranged weapons, and do not trust bows or crossbows unless trained in their use by other peoples.
Neanderthals as Characters
Neanderthals do not have racial hit dice, and advance by character level. They favor martial classes such as fighter, barbarian and brawler. Spellcasters are mostly druids and sorcerers. A neanderthal character has the following racial traits
+2 Str, +2 Con, -2 Dex Neanderthals are hearty and strong, but thickset and lacking in hand-eye coordination
Humanoid (human) Neanderthals are humanoids with the human subtype
Normal Speed A neanderthal moves at a speed of 30 ft.
Endurance as a bonus feat
Hunter A neanderthal gains a +2 racial bonus to Stealth and Survival checks
Resourceful A neanderthal gains a +1 racial bonus to attack and damage rolls made with broken weapons, and ignore 1 point of Armor Check Penalty when using broken armor or shields.
Weapon Familiarity A neanderthal treats a iuak, ritiik, suglin and tigerskull club as martial weapons
Wrestler A neanderthal gains a +2 racial bonus to its CMB to grapple an opponent, and a +2 racial bonus to its CMD against grapple attempts.
Illiteracy A neanderthal cannot read or write. A neanderthal can learn to read and write a language by spending 3 skill ranks in Linguistics
Languages A neanderthal begins play speaking Thal. A neanderthal with an Intelligence bonus may select from the following languages: Common, Orc, Pilt, Sylvan
”Frostburn Weapons” © Wizards of the Coast, by David Griffith. Accessed at the Frostburn Art Gallery here
Neanderthal Weapons
Neanderthals have developed weapons from bone and stone. Neanderthals have weapon familiarity with the following exotic weapons
Iuak One Handed Exotic Weapon
Price 12 gp; Damage 1d4 (S); 1d6 (M); Critical 19-20x3; Weight 4 lbs; Damage Type slashing; Qualities fragile
An iuak is a flint blade weighted towards the end, which can strike like a hatchet or axe. An iuak is especially useful for chopping—attacks made with an iuak ignore the first 3 points of an object’s hardness.
Ritiik Two Handed Exotic Weapon
Price 5 gp; Damage 1d8 (S); 1d10 (M); Critical x3; Weight 6 lbs; Damage Type piercing; Qualities fragile, grapple, trip
A ritiik is a short polearm like a spear, except that it has a sharp hook at the base of the blade that can be used to grapple or trip opponents.
Suglin Two Handed Exotic Weapon
Price 35 gp; Damage 2d6 (S); 2d8 (M); Critical x2; Weight 20 lbs; Damage Type slashing; Qualities fragile, performance, reach
A suglin is an oversized polearm crafted with sharpened antlers. Although it deals massive damage and is intimidating, it is difficult to use. A suglin imposes a -2 penalty on all attack rolls by a proficient user, and a user without proficiency suffers a -6 penalty.
Tigerskull Club One Handed Exotic Weapon
Price 16 gp; Damage 1d6 (S); 1d8 (M); Critical x4; Weight 8 lbs; Damage Type bludgeoning and piercing; Qualities disarm, fragile
A tigerskull club is made from the lacquered skull of a great beast, typically a smilodon. The teeth can be used to wrestle away a weapon as easily as to punch holes in an opponent.
Neanderthal barbarian 1 CR ½
XP 200
N Medium humanoid (human)
Init +0; Senses Perception +5
Defense
AC 12, touch 8, flat-footed 12 (+4 armor, -2 rage)
hp 17 (1d12+5)
Fort +7, Ref +0, Will +3
Offense
Speed 30 ft. (40 ft. unarmored)
Melee greatclub +6 (1d10+7/x3) or dagger +6 (1d4+5/19-20x2)
Ranged spear +0 (1d8+5/x3)
Special Attacks rage (7 rounds/day)
Base Statistics
when not raging, the neanderthal barbarian’s statistics are as follows:
AC 14, touch 10, flat-footed 12; hp 15; Fort +5; Will +1; Melee greatclub +4 (1d10+4/x3); Ranged spear +0 (1d8+3/x3); CMB +4 (+6 grapple); CMD 14 (16 vs. grapple) Skills Climb +6, Swim +6
Statistics
Str 21, Dex 11, Con 20, Int 10, Wis 12, Cha 8
Base Atk +1; CMB +6 (+6 grapple); CMD 16 (18 vs. grapple)
Feats Athletic, Endurance (B)
Skills Acrobatics +1, Climb +8, Perception +6, Stealth +3, Survival +3, Swim +8; Racial Modifiers +2 Stealth, +2 Survival
Languages Thal
SQ fast movement, illiteracy, resourceful, wrestler
Ecology
Environment any land
Organization solitary, pair, band (3-6), party (2-8 plus 1 3rd level elite) or tribe (4-40 plus 1 3rd level elite per 5 individuals, 1 5th level shaman and 1 5th level chief, plus 100% noncombatants)
Treasure NPC gear (hide armor, greatclub, 2 stone spears, stone dagger, other treasure)
Special Abilities
Resourceful (Ex) A neanderthal gains a +1 racial bonus to attack and damage rolls made with broken weapons, and ignore 1 point of Armor Check Penalty when using broken armor or shields.
Wrestler (Ex) A neanderthal gains a +2 racial bonus to its CMB to grapple an opponent, and a +2 racial bonus to its CMD against grapple attempts.
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-Concept-Art-House
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i want there to be a d&d class called “absolutely off the shits” where you just channel primal unsettling terror to make your enemies shit themselves in fear and by channel I mean rush at enemies screaming at an unnatural pitch as your eyes roll back in your head and maul them with your bare nails. you just get possessed by feral batshit insanity. no not a barbarian just a rabid bastard who’s insensitive to pain and currently using their face as a greatclub. no weapons no proficiencies in weapons except weapons of convenience. infinite HP while in battle but if they go below a certain amount they just die after the battle’s over. they get advantage on attack rolls because everyone instinctively wants to run like hell upon seeing them foam at the mouth and shriek like a demon
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Lineage: Orkish (Or-Kish)
Note: I was inspired by the recent change in focus by WoTC in switching to utilizing lineages rather than races to represent characters and their diversity. So I began to ponder more variable lineages for our base races rather than those seen in the Gothic Unearthed Arcana.
Greenskins, tuskers, orcs, savages, and barbarians. All words that have been used to name the hardy survivor and typically warrior peoples that are found across just as many worlds as humanity and their elven counterparts. If Dwarves are to Elves than the Orks are to Humans, for while the Elder races of Dwarf and Elf are rigid in their ways, few can claim to be more diverse than humanity and its counterpart the Orks.
To be of Orkkish lineage is to be born of strength be it physically as is most common or mentally, for it has been seen numerous times that Orks have proven their strength to stand in the way of death and challenge when no others will. While they rarely have little hand in the ways of shaping their worlds it is often the Orkish heroes who live and die that change the very world around them.
Like humanity, they can be of great good and great evil, but always the Orks are foolishly brave and strong no matter where they can be found.
Creature Type: You are Humanoid.
Size: You are Medium.
Speed: You have a speed of 30 ft.
Ability Score Increase: You increase one ability score of your choice by 2 and another by 1.
Languages: You begin speaking, reading, and writing Orkkish. As well as one other language of your choice, typically common.
Relentless Endurance: When you are reduced to 0 Hit Points but not killed outright, you can drop to 1 hit point instead. You can’t use this feature again until you finish a Long Rest.
Variable Traits: Select two abilities of your choice at creation from the options below.
Natural Warrior: As a bonus action, you can move up to your speed toward an enemy of your choice that you can see or hear. You must end this move closer to the enemy than you started. In addition, your attacks are more brutal whenever you score a critical hit with a weapon attack, you can roll one of the weapons damage dice one additional time and add it to the extra damage of the critical hit.
Wrath’s Charm: Your natural strength is both intimidating and useful for life’s many burdens. You gain proficiency in the Intimidation skill and you count as one size larger when determining your carrying capacity and the weight you can push, drag, or lift.
Burden of the Horde: Used to acting as a single drop in a flood, you have proficiency in two of the following skills of your choice: Animal Handling, Insight, Intimidation, Medicine, Nature, Perception, and Survival. In addition, you have advantage on an attack roll against a creature if at least one of your allies is within 5 feet of the creature and the ally isn’t incapacitated.
Child of the Dark: Born among Orks dwelling deep beneath the lands of light, you have Darkvision out to 60 feet, you see in darkness as if it was dim light and dim light as if it was bright light. Also you gain a climb speed equal to your movement speed.
Tools of War: You were trained in the tools of war from an early age and are proficient in Battleaxes, Greatclubs, Greataxes, Mauls, and Shields. In addition, you are proficient with Medium Armour.
Changelog
3/04/21 - Posted
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Urban Bloodrager (Bloodrager Archetype)
Since we’ve come back to the letter U, it was inevitable that we would see another string of “urban” versions of classes that are normally associated with the wilds and uncivilized lands (not to mention other archetypes with urban in the name). Hard to believe I’ve been doing this blog long enough to nearly loop the alphabet twice!
In any case, just as there are urban barbarians, it only makes sense there would be urban bloodragers. Like their non-magical kin, these ragers have learned to temper and direct their bloodlust to strike down foes while minimalizing collateral damage, which is especially important given their spellcasting and other magical abilities.
Like urban barbarians, they might belong to tribes that have been subsumed into civilization for one reason or another, but they might have also arisen spontaneously, particularly in settings where being a bloodrager is a separate mutation from sorcery, rather than being the same magical power focused through the lens of rage.
Though hardly a fantastical ability, these mystical warriors are more familiar with different skills associated with civilization than other bloodragers.
Their bloodrage, however, is more focused, letting them focus on strength, agility, and endurance as they need to. As they grow in might, the benefits grow, and they gain more power to distribute between their physical aspects.
Rather than be warded against the spells of allies, they instead project that ward onto others, protecting them from the worst of their own magic.
Given their contact with other arcane spellcasting traditions, these bloodragers can learn a limited number of spells from the bardic and magus traditions in addition to those they already know.
If you like a more modular rage buff and avoiding damaging your allies with area effect spells, this archetype might appeal to you. The ability to ward allies from your own spells is very useful for those packing area-effect spells in spades and who are not constantly on the front lines, so there is that as well. The archetype also suggests a handful of more “civilized” bloodlines to match up with this archetype, but they are hardly required. Build as you see fit.
Thinking about magical characters that bridge the gap between “civilization” and so-called “savage cultures” gets me thinking about how magic might be used as bigoted “evidence” of an immigrating culture’s other-ness. It’s a touchy subject, but it definitely falls under the purview of things that might be interesting to explore if everyone is alright with it.
When they lived in Kurain Forest, the Kurain elves mastered all forms of horticulture, some even gaining a measure of plantlike power themselves. However, they were unable to stop the Black Blight which turned their home into a hostile, polluted place. Now refugees, they find their new neighbors unnerved by their strange plant-based magic and medicine, including the cultivation of suture vines to treat bleeding wounds.
On the red sandy world of Sunac, more and more exiles from the lands of the shobhab and turned up in other cultures, some even sporting the strange rage magic they are known for. While this does represent a rare opportunity to learn from the insular race, one has to wonder what is going on in shobhab territory for this to be happening.
Thusela wandered into town one day from the north. Though she is foreign, she is a hard worker, doing many different tasks around the town for coin. Once, when a group of goblin raiders came calling, she strode out against them with her greatclub, sprouting the white scales of a dragon, and drove them off with cold and claw.
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Barbarian 5e (Review)
This is a review of Dungeons and Dragons fifth edition Barbarian class. The class features provided for Player characters will be judged on their mechanic role (martial, magic, utility, etc.) and their roleplaying effect (how it feels to the players and story.)
Barbarian's Role
RAGE RAGE RAGE RRRRRAAAAAAGGGGEEE!!!!
This is a barbarian's signature quirk along with other features that make you very tanky and great as a martial class. Full level investment in this class demands high Constitution ability score
Essentially you will be roleplaying as a tough, angry character. Think of the hulk or wolverine.
Hit Points
This is your first taste of the tankiness that Barb's exude. You get d12 Hit Die, which no other class gets as good. For comparison, fighters, paladins, and rangers get d10 Hit Die, and this is already considered good. Barbs get the special treatment with a d12.
Let's do calculations for the mathletes
The average roll for a 1d12 is 6.5
If you get to level 20 that's an average of 130 hit points. If you reach the max potential of 24 Constitution ability score at level 20, that's an ability modifier of +7. That's another 140 hit points to add to the first 130, an average of 270. This is extremely tanky for a PC. If you want to be even more ridiculous by pick up the Tough feat, then you can have average 310 hit points.
Some Comparisons:
A CR20 Ancient White Dragon has an average of 333 hit points!
A wizard's highest instant damaging spell is a level 9 Meteor Swarm this does 20d6 fire damage + 20d6 bludgeoning damage. An average of 140 damage. A barbarian can easily get resistance against both damage types.
That's BBEG level of tankiness!
This offers a fantastic role-playing opportunity for you take a meteor to the face and then heal most, if not all, the damage with a power nap
In short, this is great
Proficiencies
Armor class choices for barbarians is akward. Light armor and medium aren't bad, but requires investment in your Dexterity ability score. Barbarians optimize Strength better than Dexterity. Unfortunately you don't get heavy armor proficiency, but you can't rage with it anyway. Either way you'll want to ditch these when your Constitution modifier is +5 or higher because unarmored defense. If you feel you need more AC you can always take a shield.
This is solid AC options for the barbarian, but not perfect.
For weapon proficiencies, you gets all the options.
Simple weapons, and Martial weapons.
This sentence means you can add your proficiency bonus to any weapon attack roll, (ranged or melee.)
Here's a list of my suggestions:
Clubs and Greatclubs aren't ideal mechanically, but good for starting at level 1 as a simple primal warrior. You can switch to better options as you progress in your campaign.
Handaxes are all around great for Barbarians. 1d6 is meh damage but light property let's you use this for two weapon attacks. Also, you can use the thrown property to make ranged attacks. Barbarians don't get a lot of ranged attack options. As a cherry on top, you can say your axes are made of bone or stone with wood handles.
Speaking of ranged weapons; Javelins and spears combine well with a shield and you can still make ranged attacks. They also support the role-playing effect of a primal warrior with their simplicity. Bonus points if you take a trident to be a gladiator or a nautical hunter.
Any melee weapon with d8 damage die works well with a shield. The RP effect is kinda basic. This combo feels more like a Fighter class, but mechanically it's reliable.
Glaives, halberds, and pikes use d10 and they have reach, and they're compatible with Great Weapon Master feat. Nothing says primal champion like knocking someone with a tenfoot pole.
Greataxe is the biggest damage die you can use with no strings attached. That d12 stacks damage if you land a critical hit.
A longbow should probably be the only ranged weapon a barbarian uses. It doesn't need a feat to synchronize with multiacttacks.
A Barbarian gets no tool proficiencies. I think this is a wasted opportunity to give the class a signature tool. Rogues get theives' tools and Druids get herbalism kit.
Strength and Constitution saving throws aren't the best saving throws mechanically-wise. Story-wise they are true the thought dude act. Break out of restraints by flexing your muscles or spray pepper juice in your eye and not blink.
Skill proficiencies are your character's main interesting socially, or useful with tasks
Animal Handling is good to give your barbarian a hunter or wildperson kind of characterization. Also good a Wisdom based social skill, or get yourself a mount with this.
Athletics, as a martial class you should be running, jumping, and climbing without messing up.
Intimidation helps pull off your scary tough rage acts, but it is a Charisma based ability. The DMG suggests that in certain cases you can use your Strength in a show of force. Crush a goblet in your hand or flip a table maybe.
Nature is a good ability if your character is hunter or wild barbarian. Unfortunately it has the same problem as Intimidation, but Nature runs on Intelligence instead. This is worse for a barbarian, because you can't use brute strength to remember nature facts.
Perception is one of the most useful abilities in the game. Scout as hunter barbarian or use this to be a watchful sentinel. Although it isnt very theatrical compared to other abilities.
Survival is another skill that helps pull off the wild warrior or hunter that you are doing. It's also useful for foraging food, or locating targets.
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My High School D&D Group
So as I’ve been doing this long-term substituting gig, some of the kids in my 4th period class put a D&D (5E) game together, and invited me to play. I agreed, because A] I’d need to supervise something like this anyway, B] they could really use my assistance (the one who’s DMing has only played once before, the others have never played), and C] it means I get to play D&D!
We rolled stats (4d6, drop lowest one), started at level 2. The DM also let us have one special thing, either an item or racial or class feature or something. Homebrewed adventure/setting.
I made a Neutral Good female Dwarf (Mountain) Druid (Circle of Spores). She was more interested in fungi than stones or gems, and was ostracized from her family that was heavily involved in working with precious metals and gems. She lived with other fungal farmers for a time, went to deepest, oldest parts of fungal caves, and communed with the 'shrooms... and they started talking back to her. Playing her as a "Hippie Grandma" type, wearing multiple layers of moldy clothes. Her special thing is that she knows the Find Familiar spell, and has a mold-infested rat as a familiar. Well, rather, the mold itself was her familiar, inhabiting & animating the corpse of a rat.
(I chose a high-WIS character in part b/c I figured the party -- and players -- would need some guidance.)
Others students make their characters. But DM keeps us separate, we only know each other’s race & class. I know there’s a Tiefling Rogue, another Druid, a Goliath Barbarian, and a Human Monk.
Adventure starts. We wake up in an underground cell, three of the walls are interlocking gears behind glass-like sheets, last is iron bars with a door in it. We are without our weapons or spell components.
There's a skeleton chained to wall. It asks to be let down. It introduces itself as “Broccoli.” (It's a PC, homebrewed Skeleton race.)
A Tiefling is in cell with us (another PC), finds he still has his lock picks on him. Frees skeleton.
Other two PCs in cell -- a Human Monk and a Goliath Barbarian -- look out door, find a clockwork guard outside. Keyring on its hip.
Monk pees on the clockwork guard. No reaction.
Goliath tries to grab keys, does so. Clockwork Guard watches this, but does not react.
Monk takes keys from Goliath, unlocks door. Clockwork guard turns, clanks down hallway.
Goliath & Monk follow, intent on destroying it. Skeleton follows. My dwarf druid follows. We think Tiefling Rogue is following, but no, he's gone off in the opposite direction.
Groups goes down hall -- which is also made of interlocking gears behind glass panes -- which ends in pile of rubble. Locked door to side. We ask Tiefling to pick lock, and realize he's not with us.
Goliath punches door, rolls a STR check to break it. Gets a 2.
Tries again, rolls a 1.
Monk helps, now Goliath rolls with advantage. Rolls a 3 and a 12. Still not enough.
My druid point out the keyring the Monk still has.
Monk tries keys, one opens door.
Opens to a "closet" where Clockwork Guard is connected by some tubes and such. Recharging? Communicating with someone?
Roll for initiative as it stirs to life!
Monk punches it. Goliath punches it.
Guard disengages from room, punches Goliath.
Monk punches again. Rolls max damage.
Goliath pees on it. Sorry, into it: player wanted to pee into what looked like a fuel port. And rolled a nat 20 on the attempt.
Skeleton & my dwarf can't do much -- we have no weapons, and all my spells do either necrotic or poison damage, which I figure it's immune to.
Tiefling appears, throws things at us -- our weapons! And my Druid’s rat familiar, scurrying along behind him.
Goliath's weapon is a greatclub-sized stale breadstick, which he can use as a weapon & he can nom on it to regain health 3/day (and it regenerates). Monk's weapon is a shortsword that glows and can heal those it stabs. Skeleton's "weapon" is a magic bag he can pull poisons out of, though the more specific he is with what he wants, the less chance he has of getting it and instead pulling out some inert goo. My Druid also gets her quarterstaff & handaxe.
Skeleton tries to capture my “obviously sick” rat, so he can harvest its diseases, but fails.
Goliath & Monk attack clockwork guard, with their weapons.
Monk lands killing blow, stabs it in neck and pries/flips its head off. Goliath pees on remains.
Tiefling tells us he found a room with vending machines. But he set it on fire. Turns out there were two Clockwork Guards in it, between the vending machines, but they were destroyed by the fire... so he’s technically got the most kills.
Session ended.
At this point I learn that
“Broccoli” had been a (human) employee at a Blockbuster Video, but was warped into this world, becoming a skeleton in the process. He’s also a Druid (somehow), but wants to become a contagion-spreading Necromancer.
The Goliath Barbarian is named “Olive Garden.” He has an INT of 5, is Chaotic Evil, diabetic, emo, and a transgender man who will become pregnant & give birth to his next character. Also, his greatclub-sized breadstick got its powers from having been dipped into the Fountain of Youth. (And his player is a huuuge troll.)
Human Monk is “White!Blade” (as in, Wesley Snipes’ Blade, but White). He had been mind controlled by an Evil Sorcerer in the past, and forced to do Horrible Things, but broke free, and now seeks revenge.
Still don’t know Tiefling Rogue’s name, but his special item is a grappling hook device attached to his tail.
I knew they’d need some guidance, but I didn’t expect this much.
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Monster Conversion - Trogg (Warcraft RPG to PF1e)
Last month, I released a conversion of a couple of Pathfinder 2e monsters converted to 1e. At the time I did it for the Throne of Night adventure path that sadly did not get completed, but lots of people are still running it despite that setback. Recently, I came across another adventure that could be fun to play as a side game for the AP, but I quickly learned that one of the monsters exclusive to it the scenario is not anywhere online. Instead of explaining to people how I’d change it, I thought it would be just as easy to convert it myself and show rather than tell.
By the by, the adventure is called “Unearthing Bael Moden” and it can be found in the Warcraft RPG Horde Player’s Guide on page 235. It was originally written for four level 2 PCs.
The trogg is a humanoid creature from the the Sword & Sorcery release of the Warcraft RPG. Rather than explain in detail what exactly these creatures are, I’ll just link their RPG write up instead. Way easier.
For those not looking to read all of that text, the TL;DR version would be “the first life form created by titans and are a grotesque parody of a dwarf, considered very distant cousins. Their flesh is living stone, and they have a capacity for great violence.”
What I found interesting is that there were two official stat blocks for the creature, including their own system rules. Unfortunately, Pathfinder 1e has to ignore some of those, so I combined the two stat blocks and converted it over as best as the monster creation rules would allow, while keeping the abilities as close to the original as possible. Note that Warcraft has the language Low-Common, which I switched to Undercommon.
Art is from the Warcraft RPG book.
Without further ado, the trogg’s stat block.
TROGG (CR 1; 400 XP)
CE or CN Medium humanoid (earth, trogg)
Init +1; Senses darkvision 120 ft.; Perception +3
DEFENSE
AC 15, touch 11, flat-footed 14 (+1 Dex, +4 natural)
hp 15 (2d8+6)
Fort +6, Ref +1, Will +1; +2 vs. poison
Defensive Abilities defensive training (+4 dodge AC vs. giants), ferocity
OFFENSE
Speed 30 ft.
Melee club +4 (1d6+4) or
slam +4 (1d4+3)
Special Attacks hatred (+1 atk vs. dwarves and giants), rage of the earth
STATISTICS
Str 16, Dex 13, Con 17, Int 8, Wis 12, Cha 7
Base Atk +1; CMB +4; CMD 15
Feats Alertness, EnduranceB
Skills Intimidate +3, Perception +3, Sense Motive +3, Stealth +5; Racial Modifiers +4 Intimidate
Languages Dwarven, Undercommon
SQ stonecunning, weapon familiarity (greatclub)
Gear club
SPECIAL ABILITIES
Armor Trained (Ex) A trogg is proficient with hide armor, leather armor, and light or heavy shields. A trogg can move at their normal speed while wearing hide armor.
Rage of the Earth (Ex) This ability is similar to the barbarian’s rage ability, except that it lasts a number of rounds equal to 5 + the trogg’s (newly improved) Constitution modifier. This ability stacks with barbarian levels when determining the total number of rounds a trogg can rage per day.
Stalker (Ex) Perception and Stealth are always class skills for troggs.
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Doc, Level 1
Name: Doc
Class: Barbarian
Race: Half-Orc
Race Features:
Darkvision
Proficiency in intimidation
When you are reduced to 0 HP but not killed outright, you can drop to 1 HP instead. You can’t use this feature again until you finish a long rest.
When you score a critical hit with a melee weapon attack, you can roll one of the weapon’s damage dice one additional time and add it to the extra damage of the critical hit.
Appearance: Unlike many half-orcs, Doc has a clear green tint to his skin. His time in the wilds has left him heavily scarred, especially on his right arm and along the left side of his face. This, along with his muscled form, makes him very intimidating at first glance.
Backstory: Born into a wandering tribe of orcs, Doc left his home as soon as he was self-sufficient enough to do so. He spent the rest of his childhood wandering from town to town, living off the land and doing odd jobs for any villagers that needed it. While visiting a seaside town, a fisherman introduced him to the trident as a weapon. From then on, Doc became known for his skills with the weapon as well as his uncommon appearance. At the start of our adventure, Doc is preparing to meet Ren, a druid of the Heren Forest, who will guide him through the dangerous territory on his way to his next job.
AC: 13
Max HP:14
Ability Scores:
Strength: 17
Dexterity: 13
Constitution: 15
Intelligence: 14
Wisdom: 13
Charisma: 12
Skills:
Athletics
Animal Handling
Perception
Survival
Intimidation
Equipment:
Trident
Greatclub
Javelin
Languages:
Common
Orc
Goblin
Feats: None
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