#ayesha r u watching this
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Roommates - E.N
(this takes place BEFORE he becomes the riddler. I wanted to write what I thought he would have been like before, so here ya go. metal head, introverted, smoker, emo Edward. lmao. also, I watched Little Miss Sunshine and fucking loved it, highly recommend. ALSO, i realize that it's very unrealistic for a small apartment to have two bedrooms EACH with their own bathrooms, but SHUT UP I DIDN'T THINK ABOUT THAT <3 so pls ignore that in this fic)
Summary: Edward Nashton: a quiet, reserved, heavy metal loving introvert. Y/n: a friendly, outgoing, hyper extrovert. Very different personalities. Though, opposites do attract.
Word Count: 10,797 (guys, what is happening to my fanfics, they are getting so long...is this a good thing?)
Content Warning: Smut, explicit language, hinting of r*pe, hinting of drugging a drink, knife, penetration, corruption kink, virgin!reader, daddy kink (brief), kind of stupid!Reader (that's mean to say but true), dom!Edward, Edward being a HUGE 'simp' for y/n, sub!Reader, praising, ed guides y/n through sex, gentle sex that turns rough later on, fingering, oral fem receiving, aftercare. (There might be grammar mistakes cuz I'm reading this over at 1:30 am, so please cut me some slack I have class in the morning lol. Hopefully the errors aren't too bad. If so, I'm sorry pookies <3 I promise the fic is still good!)
Songs For Inspo:
Kunst - KMFDM
Custer - Slipknot
Sweating Bullets - Megadeth (my FAVORITE metal band, Dave Mustaine ik ur like over 60 but we can figure something out, please u were so hot in the 80's and u still are plssssss...)
Bounce! - System Of A Down (love them sm)
Revenga - System Of A Down (one of my fav songs by them)
Freak On a Leash - Korn (yoNatooRADatEDotRAndat - John Davis in his songs)
Chop Chop Slide - Insane Clown Posse (edward would SO listen to them, not listening to any other opinions. also this song is so funny like its the cupid shuffle but violent.)
Heavy Metal Lover - Lady Gaga
Eddie My Love - The Chordettes
Vacation Bible School - Ayesha Erotica
Daddy AF - Slayyyter (Edward is so daddy AF guys, i don't think u understand fr like i want this man to *censored*)
(picturing Edward Nashton as a metalhead is hot to me and I feel like it is EXTREMELY accurate for his character. Like, he's an introverted lunatic...he definitely loves metal. This is now a personal headcanon of mine.)
~Read Below Cut~
~
"Oh, you precious thing..." Edward cooed, reaching down and stroking her hair.
Y/n looked up at him, eyes wide and mouth slightly agape. He chuckled, trailing his hand away from her hair and down to her chin. Gently, he pulled at y/n's bottom lip with his thumb. Y/n squeezed her thighs together.
"Do you want me to fuck you?" He asked sweetly, a hint of desire lacing his tone.
Y/n whimpered, breathing heavily. She didn't even know how to respond to his question. It was so bold and blunt, something that he was able to be with ease. But y/n had a hard time with that, unable to get her thoughts out fully. She nodded, lips forming a pitiful pout as she looked up at him. Edward bent back down to her level, grabbing her leg gently and lifting it up. Slowly, he trailed kisses up her shin, over her knee, and up to the bottom of her thigh. Y/n shivered at the feeling of his lips against her skin.
"Yeah? You want me to fuck you, angel? I need to hear you say it."
"Y-Yes, Eddie, please..." She whined.
He smiled, looking up into her eyes as he planted another kiss on her knee. Edward's eyes were glazed with adoration and love, lust only a small part of the glint. He desired y/n, yes, that was a fact. But, he didn't want her in an animalistic way, no not at all. He so badly wanted to pop her cherry gently, showing her how much he loved her with his body. There was plenty of time for more rough and kinky acts in the future, but you didn't get another chance at your first time. And Edward wanted y/n's first time to be loving, caring, fun, meaningful, and passionate.
"I'll give it to you angel, I promise. I'm going to show you what sex is, what it means, and I'll show you how much I love you through it."
~
-3 months before-
~
Edward heard a knock at the door just barely through the music he had playing. Groaning, he got up from his desk in his bedroom, walking out into the living room. His hair was a mess, black streaks scattered throughout his hair due to a crappy dye job he did. A lit cigarette hung from in between his lips as he opened the door. Grabbing the cig, he held it between his pointer and middle finger. Before him was a young girl, maybe a year younger than him, with a bunch of boxes and a single suitcase. He raised an eyebrow at her.
"Hi! I'm your new roommate! Y/n L/n! We talked over the phone, remember!?" She exclaimed, reaching out and shaking his hand rapidly.
Edward instantly grimaced.
"Oh, how could I forget..." He mumbled.
"These are all my things, is it ok if I come in?" She asked politely, a bright smile on her face.
"Um, yeah. Do you want help carrying your stuff in?" He begrudgingly asked, putting out his cigarette on the ashtray near the door.
"Oh, that would be so nice! Thank you!" Y/n beamed.
Edward started to bring in some boxes, moving them to the spare bedroom. Y/n grabbed a box as well, looking around the apartment. She didn't like that he smoked inside, but she felt better when she noticed he had a window open. She really appreciated that. With a bounce in her step, y/n brought back boxes to her new room. The metal music that Edward was listening to was still playing in the back, fairly loudly.
"You have the same music taste as my dad!" She commented, smiling.
Edward froze in place, box in hand as he looked at her. His face was blank, only a look of confusion in his eyes. Y/n felt herself blush and quickly got back to moving things to her room. Edward rolled his eyes as he placed the last box on her bed. He shoved his hands in his pockets, looking at the contents scattered all over the floor.
"You've got a lot of clothes..." He stated.
"They aren't all clothes!" She laughed, finding it amusing that he thought that.
"Then what the hell do you have in these boxes?" He asked, regretting it instantly, because he truthfully did not care.
Y/n looked around for something to open up a cardboard box with. She looked at the desk in her room, smiling when she saw a pencil. Grabbing it, she stabbed it through the tape and Edward flinched, taking a step back. Y/n ripped the tape away with help from the hole she punched in it. She picked it up and angled it slightly so Edward could see the contents. He opened it up, looking inside and raising an eyebrow, glancing back up at y/n. Pulling out a picture, he looked at it and laughed.
"A bunch of cartoon horses?" He asked.
"It's the Mane 6 from My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, thank you very much!" She huffed.
"Alright then, well I'm going to leave. Have fun unpacking the things you stole from an 8 year old." He commented before leaving her room.
"That's so rude!"
~
The two of them instantly recognized how different their personalities were. It was a little jarring at first, living with someone who was the complete opposite of them. But, Edward tried to keep to himself a lot. However, y/n found herself becoming more and more interest in Edward. She definitely had a type...
Tall.
Metalhead.
Slightly scary/intimidating.
Looks a little bit homeless.
He checked off all the requirements on y/n's list....
~
-2 weeks after moving in-
~
Y/n's room was fully decorated and furnished. The bed that was already in the room now had pink and white bedsheets with lace on the ends. A bunch of fairly lights were strung about the room and she had all her posters hung up. Shelves were lined with stuffed animals, figurines, and candles. Y/n's room smelled like fruit punch and flowers, if that made any sense. Her room was so cozy and homey, just how she wanted it. Though, most people would say it was too cheery and bubbly for a bedroom. And, those people were dead wrong in y/n's opinion. Y/n was currently listening to music and dancing in her room on top of the fluffy pastel pink rug she had. She was wearing a pair of black leggings that flared at the bottom and a hot pink spaghetti strap tank top. Underneath that she was wearing a white lacy bra. Edward was at work today, so she wasn't worried about the music being too loud.
"Sometimes I wonder if you still wanna fuck me..." She giggled to the lyrics, spinning out of her room.
The white socks she wore caused her to slid across the tiled floor of the kitchen. She swayed her hips back and forth, dancing to the fairly erotic song that was playing. Opening the pantry door, she grabbed a box of cheez-its. Y/n took a bowl from one of the cabinets and poured some of the crackers in. She put the box away and started to snack on the cheez-its. The sound of the front door opening was drowned out by the loud music. Y/n was dancing away, oblivious to the fact that Edward was watching her dance as he put away his keys and coat.
'Well, it's fine because I'm a whore'
'And I sleep with guys just for fun and drugs'
Y/n was still swaying her hips around, jumping up and down slightly. Edward chuckled, stuffing his hands into his pockets, one of which had a chain dangling next to it. Y/n turned around eyes closed as she sang the lyrics, opening slightly at the end.
"Vacation Bible Schoooo..." She froze, hands in the air.
"Hey." He said, eyes heavy and tired.
The music continued playing in the background, causing Edward to smile slightly. Y/n let her hands fall to her sides, a blush on her face. She cleared her throat, grabbing a cheez-it.
"Hello Edward, nice day outside, right?" She asked, placing the cheez-it in her mouth.
"Yeah, really good day to listen to bimbo music in my kitchen." He commented.
"Shut up."
~
The two roommates had grown tolerable of the other after some time. Y/n was still absolutely obsessed with Edward, finding his mysterious and intimidating nature addicting. Every time he was near her or talked to her, she felt her stomach do backflips. And, Edward was no idiot. He knew how she felt. He was a genius, for sure, but it didn't take a genius to know how y/n felt about him. He didn't want to act on it just yet, even though he felt himself getting feelings for her as well. But, he did enjoy purposefully teasing her. It was a fun little game for him.
~
-1 month after moving in-
~
It was around 10 in the morning and y/n sat on the couch, bundled up in blankets. She was as snug as a bug in a rug. It was her day off from work, and she didn't really have much planned. Because of this, she decided that she would watch a bunch of Pixar movies, starting with Cars. Cars was one of those movies that y/n could watch over and over and never get tired of.
"Where is it...?" Edward mumbled.
Y/n realized that she forgot to tell Edward that she had the day off. It aligned well with his work schedule, as he didn't work today either. She wanted to ask him if he wanted to watch Pixar movies with her. Though, she figured that he would say no, in classic Edward fashion. Y/n looked to her right, ready to ask Edward, but her face flushed instantly. Edward stood in the living room, looking around with a towel wrapped around his waist. He was completely naked, other than the towel of course. His hair was slightly dry, though still damp in most places. Y/n couldn't see his eyes that well because his hair hung in his face, covering most of his face up. Edward looked up, not really reacting when he saw y/n.
"Oh, hey y/n. Aren't you supposed to be at work?" He asked, hand gripping his towel.
"U-Um, today is m-my day off. I meant t-to tell you, but I fo-forgot..." She stuttered.
Edward took in her flustered appearance, knowing the affect he had over her. Sighing, he ran a hand through his hair, getting it out of his face. Y/n watched with her eyes wide as he continued to walk around the living room.
"Have you seen my shirt? The uh...the...oh the Slayer shirt." He asked.
Edward looked towards y/n, mouth forming an 'o' as he saw the shirt resting on the top of the couch behind her. He walked over, leaning down slowly, making sure to get as close to y/n as possible. Based on how stiff she became, Edward could tell that he was definitely doing a good job at teasing her.
"Here it is. Oh, are you watching Cars? That's a good move. Mind if I watch it with you?" He asked, voice coarse from smoking a cigarette earlier.
"Oh, u-um, sure yeah. I was g-gonna ask you that actually." She mumbled.
"Alright, well I'm going to get changed. I'll be back."
~
Over the next few months, y/n and Edward's attraction to each other grew stronger. Y/n would follow Edward around like a dog after it's owner, and it was extremely apparent to him. One night, y/n decided she would go out to a party with her friends from work. Not wanting to be alone, even though she knew most of the people, she invites Edward.
~
-2 months after moving in-
~
Y/n knocked on Edward's bedroom door, a System Of A Down song playing loudly on his speakers. Shuffling was heard from behind the door, and then the music was turned down, but not too much. The door swung open to reveal Edward, who leaned against the doorframe. He had a very slightly cropped black tank top on with the skull from Megadeth on it, a few small holes ripped in it. His jeans were washed out and a chain dangled from one of his pockets. Y/n could see his happy trail above his belt, and she felt her breath hitch. Edward pushed his glasses up, crossing his arms over his chest.
"Yeah?" He asked.
"Oh, um...I'm going to a a work friend's party tonight. Just a few drinks and music, stuff like that. I was wondering if you uh, if you might wanna go with me?" She asked, fidgeting with her hands as she looked at the floor.
Edward smirked, noticing how shy y/n was at the moment. It was clear that she desperately wanted him to go with her. He usually didn't like parties, but he couldn't say no to her face. Not when she looked so small in front of him, so needy for his presence at all times. It fed his ego for sure, but it was also nice to be wanted.
"Is there a dress code or some shit?" He asked.
"N-No, I don't think so? If there is then she never mentioned it."
"Ok, then this is what I'm wearing." He said.
"So, does that mean you're coming?" Y/n asked, excitement lacing her voice.
"Sure. I don't have any other plans."
"Yay! I'm going to go get ready right now! We need to leave in 30 minutes!" Y/n squealed, running to her room.
Edward watched her, closing the door to his bedroom a few seconds after. He turned the music off, knowing that they would be leaving soon. Opening his closet, he looked for a jacket to wear over his tank top. Grunting, he grabbed the first one he saw, which was denim. He had patches sewn on it, each from different bands he listened to. He also sewed a bunch of green question marks into it. Shrugging, he slid the jacket on and grabbed a pack of smokes from off his nightstand. His lighter was already in his pocket, so he grabbed his pocket knife and put it in his back pocket. You could never be too safe in Gotham. Even he knew that. As he walked out of his bedroom and closed the door behind him, he wondered about what he just agreed to. If y/n's friends were anything like her, then he would have a headache within the first 5 minutes. Sighing, he grabbed his wallet from off of the table next to the front door and put it in his other front pocket. He could hear music from y/n's room as the shower cut off. A couple seconds later he could hear the hairdryer. Y/n usually liked to take her time getting ready, but if there was a time limit then she could get ready extremely fast. She always liked to be early to everything, which was a good thing. Edward was the same way.
"Can't even drink while I'm there..." He mumbled, realizing that should be prepared to be the designated driver.
After about 10 minutes, y/n came out of her bedroom. She had on a lacy spaghetti strap tank top, it was a soft purple in color. Her pants were ripped denim shorts, which was a good choice since it was summer in Gotham. Y/n's hair was let down, wavy in some places and curly in others, chaotic but cute, just like her. Underneath her hair was a white ribbon that tied into a quaint bow on the top of her head, off-centered on purpose so it wasn't so symmetrical. Blush adorned her cheeks and the tip of her nose. Her eyelashes were accentuated with mascara, a glittery eyeshadow with no color covered her eyelids. Y/n's lips were plumped up with a shiny pink lip-gloss. Edward felt heat rush to his face, and he quickly looked away.
"Ok! I'm done! Just gotta get shoes on!" Y/n cheered, rushing to the door.
Edward stood up, watching her as she bent over and slid on light blue converse. The shoes had tiny gems on the edges, and stickers on the top of it. He remembered when she customized them. He walked in the living room one night to see her hunched over them, it was really amusing. Clearing his throat, he slid his combat boots on. Y/n grabbed her purse and Edward grabbed his car keys.
"You're gonna have to tell me the directions." He said.
"Oh, are you driving?"
"I was hoping we could take my car."
"Aw, but I wanna take my car..." Y/n pouted.
He grunted, closing his eyes shut. Mumbling under his breath he pinched the bridge of his nose. Edward let out a sigh and placed his keys back on the table.
"Ffffine."
"Yay!"
-
Edward was slumped in the passenger seat of y/n's soft pink mini cooper. The interior was light brown leather, and it smelled just like her room, like fruit punch. Tiny little stuffed animals, beanie babies, and squishmallows were in her backseat. One beanie baby, which was a unicorn, was in the corner of her dashboard, in front of Edward. Y/n giggled, turning into the driveway of her friends house. She got out of the car quickly, shutting the door behind her. Edward got out too, hitting his head on the roof of the inside of the car. Wincing, he cursed under his breath. Once he was out he closed the door, hearing y/n lock the door shortly after.
"Your car makes me stick out like a sore thumb." He said.
"Yep! I know! Now, let's go!" Y/n said, skipping to the front door.
Edward shoved his hands in his pockets, following y/n slowly. The only reason he agreed to coming was to make sure y/n was safe. He hated going to parties, and he didn't even know the people, so it was even worse. But, it's hard to say no when y/n gives him puppy dog eyes. Stepping up on the front porch, y/n knocked rapidly on the door, ringing the doorbell twice after. Edward chuckled softly, standing behind her. When the door opened, y/n was practically bouncing in place.
"Oh, y/n! Hey! I was worried you weren't coming!" Her friend said.
"Sorry, Emily, we got stuck in traffic." Y/n said, gesturing to Edward.
Emily looked behind y/n, looking Edward up and down. He looked ominous towering over behind y/n. His eyes were tired and he smelled like leather and pine.
"Oh, you'll have to introduce everyone to him. Me included. But, please, come in! It's really hot outside. We've got AC in here." Emily said, moving aside so they could walk in.
"Thanks Emmy!" Y/n walked inside, Edward following close behind.
With how close Edward was following y/n, you'd think that he'd be scared to leave her side. But, he wasn't. Not even close. He didn't look like a lost puppy, he looked like a rabid attack dog that would maul someone if they breathed a little too hard. He was like a bodyguard following y/n around. Everyone looked towards y/n, smiling when they saw her. At work, y/n was considered the nicest and friendliest person. But, that also led to people taking advantage of her. Asking her to cover shifts, stay late, and even do other peoples jobs. Edward knew about all of this, because y/n would tell him about it. It was sad that she didn't realize it was manipulation. This was partially another reason that Edward came: to make sure that y/n wasn't coerced into doing something for someone. He didn't want to see her come home 3 hours past when her shift ended for the 3rd time this week.
"Hey girl! Oh, who's Mr. Tall, scary, and hostile?" A girl asked.
Edward looked at her, his face emotionless and dull. The girl looked away quickly, feeling uncomfortable under his gaze. Y/n smiled as everyone gathered around, it wasn't that many people, maybe 10 people. That was without including her and Edward. Emily was there as well. Placing her hands on Edward's shoulder, y/n shook him lightly, not getting a reaction from him. A few people chuckled, causing Edward to grunt lightly.
"This is my roommate, Edward! I'd be living on the streets without him!"
"Oh, THAT Edward! Y/n talks about you all the time at work!" One guy said, taking a sip of his drink.
Edward smirked slightly, letting it fall as quickly as it appeared. Y/n awkwardly laughed, brushing the comment off.
"Uh, where's the drinks at? I'm parched!" She asked.
"In the kitchen, and outside we have music playing, we have a pool too. Though, I forgot to mention that to everyone. So, only go for a swim if you're ok with not having a change of clothes." Emily laughed.
"I already know someone is going to get so drunk they jump in. And, it won't be me. Maybe." Y/n smiled.
Emily turned to Edward.
"Do you want a drink, Edward?" She asked.
"I'll take a Coke." Was all he said.
"I'll get it for ya!" Y/n smiled, going to the kitchen.
Some people in the house made their way outside, other's sat on the couch in the living room and talked. Edward leaned against the wall that connected to the banister of the staircase. He crossed his arms over his chest as he watched y/n in the kitchen, ignoring basically everyone around him.
"So, what's it like living with y/n?" Emily asked.
Edward raised an eyebrow, breaking eye contact with y/n to look at the fairly tall woman. He shrugged, sighing as he looked up at the ceiling.
"It was jarring at first, she's pretty hyper. But, I'm getting used to it." He replied simply.
"Well, Adam was right earlier. She does talk about you a lot. Don't tell her I said that though." She laughed.
"Uh huh." He mumbled.
Emily took this as a sign to walk away, which Edward greatly appreciated. He was not one for socializing. Hence, why he doesn't like parties. Shortly after, y/n came back from the kitchen. She gave Edward a can of Coke, and took a sip of the drink she got.
"What did you get?" He asked.
"Margarita. Well, a poorly made one. But, a margarita nonetheless." She replied, giggling.
"Alright."
"You wanna go outside?" Y/n asked.
"Sure, I need a smoke anyways." He grunted.
The two of them walked outside, Edward glaring at some of her coworkers as they did so. His glasses caught the reflection of the moon, and he leaned against the outside of the house. Placing his coke down on the porch banister, he pulled out a cigarette. With it between his lips, he lit the end of it and took a drag. He blew smoke to his left, making sure it was going away from the backdoor, not wanting to get smoke inside the host's house. Watching y/n, he noticed her talking to a few people, coworkers no doubt. The sound of crickets and frogs in the summer night comforted Edward and made him feel relaxed. Taking another drag, he blew it to his side again. Y/n had already drank her entire margarita. She came back to the patio and looked at Edward, pointing at her drink.
"Gonna get another!" She said.
He nodded curtly, confused as to why she told him. He wasn't in charge of her. She could do what she wanted. He took another puff from his cigarette. The two guys that y/n was talking to approached him. He raised an eyebrow, looking up at them from his hunched over posture.
"Yeah?" He asked, voice hoarse.
"You're y/n's roommate?" One guy asked.
"Last time I checked." He answered.
"Can you do us a solid?" The other one asked.
Edward didn't answer, only looked at them. The guy on the left elbowed the guy on the right softly, chuckling. Ed took another drag from his cigarette.
"Is she a good fuck?" One of them asked.
"Yeah, she seems like she'd open her legs for a good price." The other commented.
Edward's eyes narrowed as he finished his drag, blowing the smoke directly at them. He mumbled under his breath, something about how gross they were. The two men coughed, trying to wave away the smoke. Edward straightened his posture, fixing his glasses that were slightly crooked.
"What the fuck, man?" One guy asked.
"That was a dick move!" The other said.
Edward put his cigarette out on the bottom of his boots. He glanced to his left and saw an ashtray on the banister. He dropped the cigarette in there. Noticing he had a few ashes on the tips of his fingers, he brushed them off on the shirts of the two guys.
"Mhm." He grunted, walking away from them and going inside.
Edward didn't bother saying anything to the two men, it would be a waste of his breath. But, he did know that he didn't want y/n to be anywhere near those cretins. He went to the kitchen, seeing y/n pour herself another margarita. Walking up to her, Edward tapped her on the shoulder. She turned around, take a huge gulp of her drink, smiling wide at him after.
"Hi Eddie!" She giggled.
"How many drinks have you had?"
"Well...th-this is my 4th one..." She hiccupped.
"I see. Well, I think it's getting late. We should head back home." He said.
Just as he said that, one of y/n's coworkers walked up to the kitchen counter. She leaned over, propping her elbows up and letting her cleavage show. Edward looked at her and rolled his eyes, looking back at y/n.
"Hey girly~ tell me about your friend here. He seems interesting." She winked at him.
"Oh! W-Well-"
"I'm not interested." He replied curtly.
The girl scoffed, standing up. She mumbled under her breath.
'Prick.'
Edward looked back at y/n, seeing that she was absolutely wasted. He sighed, wrapping an arm around her shoulder. The two men from early walked in and Edward glared at them. Leading y/n to the living room, he whispered down in her ear discreetly.
"We need to leave, ok? I'll tell you why when we get in your car."
She nodded, unsure of why Edward wanted to leave so bad. But, after living with him for a little over 2 months, she trusted him. Y/n glanced over her shoulder and saw two guys staring at her. She looked back at Edward and he nodded subtly. Y/n took this as a signal to say bye to her coworkers.
"H-Hey guysss, it's g-getting late. I think weee're gonna go hooome." She said, smiling drunkenly.
"Aw, already? It's only been an hour since you got here! Stay longer, you're always the life of the party!" One girl with a braid said.
Edward squeezed her shoulder reassuringly, knowing how easily she was influenced by her coworkers. She fidgeted with the hem of her tank top, drinking the rest of her margarita. She shook her head.
"N-No, sorry..."
"Ok, well, before you leave, do you think you can cover a shift for me this weekend? I know you don't work weekends, but I have a concert to go to and I really don't want to miss it." A guy said.
"Well, I-I sup-pose..."
Y/n looked up at Edward, seeing that he was watching the two guys in the kitchen. They were eyeing up y/n, and y/n finally noticed that. She shook her head.
"No, I can't. We-We're leaving nowww, bye everyone." She slurred.
Before anyone could say anything, Edward made sure y/n had her purse on her and they left the living room. He guided her to the front door, watching the two guys as he opened up the door for her. He quickly followed her, closing the door and helping her go down the steps. Edward opened up the passenger door for her, making sure she buckled herself in. He groaned before getting in the driver seat of the pastel pink mini cooper. He felt like a giant in the vehicle.
"Who were those two guys?" He asked, buckling up and backing out of the driveway.
"J-Josh and Aaron..." She stuttered.
"Don't ever talk to them at work. Don't ever accept anything from them and do your best to not work a shift alone with them." He demanded, his tone serious and instructive.
Y/n nodded.
"W-Why?" She asked.
Edward sighed, gripping the steering wheel as he put the blinker on. He turned left and glanced quickly at y/n.
"They asked me a very disgusting question about you. And then they made a gross comment on you." He said.
"Like w-what?" She asked.
Edward scoffed, stopping at a red light.
"Well, one of them asked me if you were a good fuck. And then the other one said that you seemed like you'd open your legs up for a good price." He said through gritted teeth.
Y/n went quiet, giggling drunkenly. Edward didn't understand why she found it amusing. But, he assumed that she was just drunk and laughing it off. Deep down, it probably made her very uncomfortable.
"I've n-never even fucked anyone bef-fore." She hiccupped.
Edward found this comment surprising. He figured a beautiful girl like her would have had plenty of sexual encounters. But, here he was, being proved wrong. Still, he shrugged and turned onto their block.
"Don't let them know that. Knowing how creepy they are, they'll probably find a way to twist that and sexualize you in ways no one ever should. They seem like the kind of people to fantasize about...taking advantage of you..." He said, shuddering at the thought, the words feeling like poison on his tongue.
Y/n mumbled to herself, staring out the window. Edward sighed, pulling into the parking garage of their apartment building. Parking the car, he got out and closed his door. Walking around the car, he opened up y/n's door and helped her get out. She groaned, the salt from the rim of her margarita cup stuck to the corners of her lips. Edward huffed, letting y/n hold onto his arm for stability. She was absolutely hammered. It was clear that she could not hold her drink well. Locking the car, Edward put the keys in his pocket and helped y/n up the stairs. When they reached their apartment, Edward unlocked the door and opened it up. Y/n went straight for the bathroom and Edward heard her gag over the toilet. Sliding off his boots, he hung his denim jacket up and picked up y/n's shoes that she removed when running to the bathroom. He walked to the kitchen, grabbing a sticky note from off the counter and picked up the pen next to it. Scribbling something down, he slapped the note onto the door of the fridge.
'Josh/Aaron=shit'
He grinned, proud of the little reminder he posted up. When the two of them needed to remember something, or communicate with the other, they would leave post-it notes on the fridge. It was usually used to let the other know if there was no milk left, or if a certain food was theirs. But, this worked good too. Edward walked to the bathroom, knocking on the door. Y/n didn't respond, but he heard a flush. The faucet of the sink ran for a little while, and then the door opened up. Y/n's mascara ran down her face slightly.
"You ok?" He asked.
"Y-Yeah...just wanna go to bed..." She mumbled, tears forming in her eyes.
Edward watched as she went to her bedroom, about to turn around to go to his own. Her meek voice caused him to stop, looking back towards her.
"Th-thank you for getting me out of there. I d-don't know why I hang out with those people..." She sniffled.
"Don't thank me, y/n. That's the whole reason I went."
"What reason?"
Edward grinned, pulling out the pocket knife he had in his back pocket. Y/n's eyes widened slightly and she blushed subtly. She felt butterflies in her stomach at the sight.
"To make sure you were safe."
~
After that incident, y/n felt safer with Edward than she had ever felt with anyone else in her life. Her fascination with Edward turned into full love. Edward felt love towards y/n as well, feeling the urge to protect her at all times. What started off as two roommates finding each other annoying, had evolved into love and adoration. One night, Edward notices how shy y/n is around him. She tells him that she has feelings for him, and he listens to every word of it.
~
-3 months after moving in-
~
Y/n sighed, a pen and paper on her desk as she sketched away. She couldn't get his eyes out of her head. His dark, tired, mysterious eyes that hid behind his messy bangs. She giggled as she remembered seeing him in only a towel, recalling how it made her stomach do backflips. A knock at her door snapped her out of her thoughts, causing her to turn down the music that played from her speaker. It was her playlist she listened to when she was in a really happy mood, so basically, it was music that Edward wouldn't listen to. She looked in the mirror, making sure her hair was cute. She was wearing a peachy color oversized t-shirt that she got from a thrift store. It ended just in the middle of her thighs, hiding the cream colored panties she was wearing. Opening the door, she looked up at Edward who stood before her. A dark olive green tank top covered his chest, his arms on display, and a pair of flannel pants hid his legs away. The black socks he wore contrasted heavily against her pink ones.
"Hey, Eddie. D-Do you need something? Is my music too loud?" She asked, feeling sheepish.
"Huh? Oh, no it's not. Uh, I was wondering if you had anything to eat yet? I haven't had something to eat, so I figured I'd just order some pizza or some shit." He said, stretching his arms upwards, revealing his happy trail.
Y/n's eyes trailed down slightly, but quickly flicked back up to his own. She shook her head, clearing her throat. Edward tilted his head to the side slightly.
"Uh, no. I haven't had anything to eat yet. P-Pizza sounds good." She stuttered, trying to hide the notebook that she was drawing by blocking it from his vision.
Edward noticed how awkward she was being, and decided to make it worse, just for fun. He pulled his phone out of his pocket and walked in y/n's room. Sitting down on her bed, he was careful not to sit on any stuffed animals. Last time he did that she nearly ripped his face off. Y/n shyly sat back at her desk, trying to ignore the fact that he was ordering food in her room. However, she took advantage of this and took occasional glances at his eyes, using them as references to get a more accurate drawing of his eyes. Edward watched as she scribbled away, placing the order over the phone. Once it was placed, he hung up and slid the phone back into his pocket. Getting up from the bed, he walked over and looked over y/n's shoulder.
"They said it'll be at least 15 minutes." He briefly explained.
Y/n flinched when she realized he was behind her. Frozen in place, she watched in terror as Edward picked up the notebook, looking at the sketches of his eyes. He chuckled, placing the notebook back down.
"Those are pretty good, you really captured how tired I look all the time." He said, being serious about his compliment.
"Th-Thank you..." She stuttered.
Her heart felt like it was about to burst with him standing behind her. Slowly, she turned around in the chair and stood up. Edward watched as she walked to her bed, picking up a hello kitty plush and fidgeting with it. She looked nervous, and Edward had a good idea as to why. Y/n sat on the edge of her bed, watching as Edward leaned against the wall that was directly in front of her.
"Um, E-Edward?" She asked.
"Uh huh?"
"There's something I need to tell you..."
He nodded, grabbing y/n's chair from her desk. Pulling it towards him, he sat in it, getting close to her. She felt her heart race, the moment feeling intimate with him being in front of her. Letting out a shaky breath, y/n fidgeted with the plush in her lap.
"W-When I first moved in with you...I was really skeptical..." She started.
He listened intently, spreading his legs slightly as he leaned back into the chair. Y/n swallowed, her throat suddenly feeling dry. His presence was enough to make y/n feel anxious.
"But, I c-couldn't help but notice that I had f-feelings...for you..." She mumbled.
"Oh really?" He asked, not surprised at all.
"Y-Yeah...I think I...I think I love you...Edward..."
He nodded, his glasses glinting from the fairy lights that were hung in y/n's room. She anxiously awaited his response. Her eyes stayed on him as he stood up, pushing the chair back to where he got it from. Taking a few steps, he stood directly in front of y/n. Sighing, he knelt down, looking up at her as he gently held her hands in his.
"I know you love me, y/n. I've known for a while. I've felt the same." He said, rubbing over her knuckles with his thumbs.
Y/n's eyes widened and she felt heat rush to her cheeks. She was stunned by his gentle demeanor, not used to it. He was usually gruff and blunt. Sure, he could be nice and caring every now and then, but this time he was being vulnerable.
"You mean..."
"Yes, y/n. I love you, too." He reassured, kissing her hand.
Y/n gasped softly, unable to comprehend what was happening before her. She watched as he reached his hand up slowly, cupping the side of her face in his palm. He hummed to himself, the music that played softly in the background providing a nice ambience, even if it was y/n's hyperpop music.
"I don't know how else to ask you, y/n, so I'll just say it." He said, sitting up, meeting her eye line.
"Will you be my girlfriend? I probably made that sound like we're in middle school, but whatever." He chuckled.
Y/n nodded frantically.
Edward smiled, looking down at her lips. Brushing his thumb over them, he sighed. Y/n looked at his as well, wondering how they would feel against hers.
"May I kiss you?" He asked.
"Yes, please."
Leaning in, he tilted his head slightly. His lips met with y/n's in a soft embrace. His hand held the sides of her face gently as y/n's slithered around his neck. She sighed in delight as he pulled away, completely enamored with his entire being.
"You're so heavenly, y/n. My angel on earth." He cooed, dimples showing as he smiled.
"Oh, Edward..." Y/n giggled.
"Why don't you and I go watch a movie while we wait for the pizza, hm?" He asked.
"That sounds good. What movie?" Y/n asked, grabbing Edward's hand as he helped her up.
Y/n tossed the hello kitty plush back on the bed. Turning off the music that was playing, she followed her boyfriend out of the room. Edward thought for a moment, running a hand through his hair. As they walked, y/n caught whiff of his scent and nearly melted. She hated the smell of smoke, but when it came from Edward mixed with pine, leather, and green tea, she couldn't resist.
"Let's watch a horror movie, is that ok with you?"
Y/n nodded.
"I love horror movies, I had a huge crush on Stu Macher for a long time. Still kinda do..."
"Oh, you're one of those girls." He winked.
Y/n blushed, sticking her tongue out at him. The two of them sat down on the couch, the only light in the room coming from the fairy lights that y/n convinced Edward to hang on the wall behind the T.V. Y/n snuggled against his chest, feeling him sigh under her touch. He rested his hand on her thigh as he wrapped his around around her. Y/n watched as Edward put on Friday The 13th. As the movie played, y/n giggled, the feeling vibrating through Edward's chest.
"What's so funny, squirt?" He asked.
"Nothing, I just can't believe we're dating now. I'm just super happy!"
"I'm happy too, angel." He cooed, kissing the top of her head.
A knock on the door made them both look away from the T.V. Edward got up, letting y/n stay on the couch. He smiled as he saw her watching the movie from the corner of his eye as he opened the door. Flipping through his wallet, he pulled out 15 dollars, 10 dollars for the pizza and 5 as a tip. He always tipped people who worked in customer service. Edward was a really friendly person, but he looked like he could rip your throat out. So, the pizza delivery guy was quick to leave. He looked at y/n and faked a surprised face as he showed her the pizza, y/n giggled and got up from the couch. Edward placed the box on the kitchen table.
"Go ahead and start eating, I'm gonna get some water. Do you want some?" He asked.
"Oh, yes please!"
Edward poured two glasses of water, bringing them back to the table and placing them down. He looked at the T.V and chuckled, looking at y/n as she took a bite of pizza.
"Honestly, if I was a killer and I saw a naked woman in the woods, I'd run away. Do you know how awkward that would be? Like, 'Hey, I know you're basically naked but I kinda wanna kill you...so...you ok with that?' Like, how do you handle that?" He asked.
"Yeah, you're right! That's so weird. I don't care who you are, if you see a naked person in the woods, you're gonna be a little thrown off." She agreed.
The two of them continued to watch the movie, eating their pizza as they did so. Edward stole occasional glances at y/n, smiling every time she laughed or reacted to the movie. Every thing she did made his heart swell. Once he finished eating and y/n finished eating, Edward cleaned up their mess, even though y/n offered to do it. The movie came to an end as Edward finished cleaning up, and y/n gave him a kiss on the cheek. He repeated the gesture, saying good night before he walked to his room. Y/n grabbed his hand, frowning as she looked at him. He chuckled and tilted his head to the side.
"What's wrong, angel?"
"Where are you going?" She asked.
"To bed...?"
"Well, um, can you sleep with me tonight?" She mumbled sheepishly.
Edward smirked, nodding as he embraced her in a hug. Y/n smiled and pulled away, running to her room quickly. Humming to himself, Edward turned off all the lights that were still on, turning the T.V off as well. He did a double check of all the windows of the apartment and the front door, making sure they were closed and locked up.
"Eddie, come on! I moved my stuffed animals for you!" She called.
"I'm coming angel, just double checking things." He said, walking to y/n's room.
Stepping inside, he saw that y/n moved all of the stuffed animals on the bed to the corner of her room, all in a pile. However, she did leave a worn out rabbit on the bed, something from her childhood. Edward had to admit, her bed looked extremely cozy with all the fluffy blankets and plump pillows she had. Y/n went into her bathroom, brushing her teeth. Edward forgot about that, and quickly went to his bathroom to do the same. Once he came back, he saw that y/n laid flat across the bed, head hanging off the other side. She was stretching her back out in a comical way. Smirking to himself, Edward crouched down and attacked her thighs with kisses. Y/n shrieked and shot up instantly. Edward looked up at her from his position on the ground, watching her face turn red. The subtle muscles in his arms were flexed from how his arms were propped up. Y/n couldn't help but stare at them, squeezing her thighs together at the sight. Edward noticed and raised an eyebrow, finding the movement to be curious. Testing it, he pushed himself up with his hands, making sure to flex his arms as he did so, and lo and behold, y/n couldn't look away. Chuckling, Edward looked down at her thighs and hummed at how gently she rubbed them together.
"What are you doing there, hun?" He asked.
Y/n looked away, blushing. Firmly, yet softly, Edward moved her chin to force her to look at him. His eyes were soft as he looked into hers, seeing how nervous she was.
"You just...you make me feel hot. And I get..." She trailed.
Edward placed his hands on her thighs, looking up at her for approval. She nodded, breath hitching as he spread her legs slightly. His expression was understanding, knowing that y/n never did anything sexual with someone before. He wasn't sure if she had done anything to herself, she obviously knew about being turned on, so most likely she has.
"...wet?" He finished smoothly.
Y/n nodded, face beet red as she watched him massage her thighs. He planted a kiss on her inner thigh, feeling goosebumps rise on her skin. Edward could feel her shiver under his touch and it drove him wild. Standing up slowly, he looked down at her. Her little bambi eyes gazed up in his baggy eyes. He brought his hand down and stroked her hair.
"You make me so...hot and bothered, Eddie. I just...please..." She sighed desperately.
"Oh, you precious thing..." Edward cooed, reaching down and stroking her hair.
Y/n's eyes were wide and her mouth was slightly agape. He chuckled, trailing his hand away from her hair and down to her chin. Gently, he pulled at y/n's bottom lip with his thumb. Y/n squeezed her thighs together once again.
"Do you want me to fuck you?" He asked sweetly, a hint of desire lacing his tone.
Y/n whimpered, breathing heavily. She didn't even know how to respond to his question. It was so bold and blunt, something that he was able to be with ease. But y/n had a hard time with that, unable to get her thoughts out fully. She nodded, lips forming a pitiful pout. Edward bent back down to her level, grabbing her leg gently and lifting it up. Slowly, he trailed kisses up her shin, over her knee, and up to the bottom of her thigh. Y/n shivered at the feeling of his lips against her skin.
"Yeah? You want me to fuck you, angel? I need to hear you say it."
"Y-Yes, Eddie, please..." She whined.
He smiled, looking up into her eyes as he planted another kiss on her knee. Edward's eyes were glazed with adoration and love, lust only a small part of the glint. He desired y/n, yes, that was a fact. But, he didn't want her in an animalistic way, no not at all. He so badly wanted to pop her cherry gently, showing her how much he loved her with his body. There was plenty of time for more rough and kinky acts in the future, but you didn't get another chance at your first time. And Edward wanted y/n's first time to be loving, caring, fun, meaningful, and passionate.
"I'll give it to you angel, I promise. I'm going to show you what sex is, what it means, and I'll show you how much I love you through it."
Y/n breathed heavily, watching as he stood back up. Glancing out of y/ns room, he looked back at her.
"I need to get something, hun. I'll be right back." He said.
Y/n watched as he left the room, hearing him opening drawers in his own. She took this as an opportunity to catch her breath, even though she figured she'd lose it again within a few minutes. As Edward came back in the room, y/n saw that he had a condom in his hand.
"If I'm going to take your virginity, I'm going to be safe about it." He said.
Y/n smiled at him, appreciating how thoughtful and responsible he was being. She would be lying if she said she wasn't nervous. But, knowing that Edward would be the one popping her cherry, she felt comfortable. Safe. In the right hands.
"Are you sure you want to do this, angel? If it's something you don't want, then I won't do it. I don't need sex from you, I'm happy just being in love with you." He said.
"Y-Yes, Ed. I'm sure. I want this. I want to do this with you." She reassured.
Edward nodded as he placed the condom on the nightstand. In one fluid motion, he removed his tank top, his bare chest on display. Y/n shivered as he let his pants fall to the ground as well. The bulge in his boxers was evident, and it caused her eyes to widen. Sitting down next to her, he patted his lap. Y/n took the invitation gladly, straddling his lap. Edward brushed a piece of hair out of her face, looking deep into her eyes.
"You're so beautiful, you know that?"
Y/n blushed, about to say something before being cut off by Edward's lips. She melted into the kiss, hooking her arms around his neck. His hands trailed down from her shoulders to her lower back. Sliding his hand under her shirt, he rubbed circles into her skin.
"Have you ever been given oral, angel? It's ok if you haven't." He said.
Y/n shook her head.
"Do you want it?"
She nodded quickly, the idea of Edward's lips over her pussy making her whimper softly. He smiled, kissing her forehead before gently flipping her over on her back. Letting her legs hang over the edge of the bed, Edward closed her legs, hooking his thumbs under the fabric of her panties. Y/n sat up, holding his hands in place. Looking up at her, he cooed.
"Honey, I'm not going to judge you. You're perfect just the way you are."
Y/n nodded, releasing her grip on Edward's hands. Propping herself up on her elbows, he watched as Edward pulled her panties off, placing them beside her on the bed. With his palms, he spread open her legs, looking at her center. He let out a shaky breath, kissing her thighs.
"Just like I figured. Perfect." He said.
Leaning forward, Edward let his breath fan against her soaked core. She shivered, hips bucking simply from his breath. Slowly, he let his tongue roll out of his mouth, placing it against her. Y/n moaned and gripped the sheets. Letting her get used to the feeling, he massaged her hips. After a few moments, he licked a stripe in between her folds. When she bucked her hips again, he held her legs down firmly. Edward began to suck at her clit, tongue flicking over it occasionally. He was fluid with his movements, making sure it wasn't too overwhelming for her. Y/n reached down and tugged at Edward's hair, signaling for him to stop. Groaning at the sensation, he pulled away from her legs. His lips glistened with her arousal, wiping it off with his thumb before licking it off. Y/n was panting heavily, face flushed.
"You did so good, angel. How did that feel?" He asked, rubbing her thighs softly.
"S-So good..." She gasped.
"I'm glad, darling. Are you ready for more?" He asked.
Swallowing a lump in her throat, she nodded. Her thighs were coated in her slick and Edward's saliva. It served as a lubrication for Edward as he gently slid his finger between her folds, letting it coat his finger with the wetness.
"Ok, I'll be slow. You'll probably feel a small stretch, ok? I'm just going to use one finger." He explained.
"Ok, Eddie. I trust you."
Just like he said, he slowly pushed his pointer finger inside of her. Wanting her to slowly adjust, he only went down to his first knuckle. Y/n whimpered, the sensation a new feeling to her. Edward pushed in to his second knuckle, causing y/n to gasp. After a few more seconds, he slid his entire finger inside her. Y/n's back arched.
"How's that feel? Does it hurt, baby?" He checked.
"N-No, just pressure...so good...m-more?" She asked.
"You want more, are you sure?"
"Yes!" She cried.
Obliging, Edward slid his middle finger inside of her. Y/n yelped, panting as he slowly pumped in and out of her. The pace was slow enough that she could handle it but not too fast to where it hurt. It was perfect, almost like he knew her body inside and out. He smirked.
"Can I do something?" He asked.
Y/n nodded.
Edward stretched his fingers out in a scissoring motion, watching y/n squeal and arch her back. He reveled in the sight of her pleasure, slowly repeating the motion as he pumped inside of her. After she got used to it, he pulled out, laughing at her whines. She grabbed his hand, putting it back between her legs. He pulled it away, shaking his head.
"Angel, don't you want me? Or, are you still not ready for it?" He asked, lifting her shirt up slightly and placing a kiss on her tummy.
"N-No, I want it! 'M just nervous..." She mumbled.
"Aw, pretty girl. I told you I'd be gentle with you. I'm going to take good care of you, I promise you. You just need to trust me, angel."
Y/n nodded.
"Ok, but if I say stop you'll stop right?" She asked.
"Of course, sweetheart."
She smiled, feeling better about what was to come. Edward gently picked her up, placing her head down on her pillow. Reaching over to his side, he grabbed the condom off the nightstand. Y/n grabbed the hem of her shirt, looking up at Edward.
"Only if you want to, y/n." He said.
She nodded, slowly lifting it up over her head. Y/n tossed it to the side. Edward looked down at her as he straddled her lap. His eyes scanned her chest, leaning down and placing kisses over it.
"You're so beautiful, y/n. I mean that." He said, in awe of the woman below him.
Y/n leaned forward, grabbing onto the waistband of Edward's boxers. He smiled at her eagerness. Nodding, he let her pull them down. Her eyes widened as his dick popped out, causing her breath to hitch. She swallowed a lump in her throat. Leaning forward, she opened her mouth. Laughing, Edward pushed her back gently. Sliding his boxers off completely, he dropped them on the ground.
"No, not tonight y/n. Tonight is about you. You're all I care about tonight." He hummed.
She nodded, watching as he opened up the wrapper for the condom. Placing the trash on the night stand, Edward rolled the condom over his dick. He hissed at the contact, twitching in his hand. Y/n shuddered at the thought of it inside of her. But, it also exhilarated her.
"Are you ready, angel? If you've changed your mind, that's perfectly fine."
"Eddie, please, I need you..." She whined.
Shivering, he nodded and lined himself up with her. He propped himself up on his right arm, cupping y/n's face with his left hand. He counted down from 3, making sure y/n wasn't caught off guard. Groaning, he slowly slid inside of her, only pushing the tip inside. Y/n moaned, reaching up and hooking her fingers in his hair.
"Oh, fuck. Angel, you're so tight. A-Are you ok...?" He asked.
Y/n nodded, taking deep breaths.
"Y-Yeah, I'm ok. Keep going, j-just slow. I want it all..."
Edward nodded, doing as she said. Slowly, his dick pushed inside her, inch by inch. The feeling of her walls stretching around him made him roll his eyes back, burying his face into the crook of her neck. He whimpered in her ear, lifting y/n up slightly so he could wrap his arms around her. Y/n whined as she felt him twitch inside of her.
"L-Let me know when you want me to move, baby." He panted.
Edward stilled inside of her, kissing her neck delicately. His heart fluttered as he felt her pulse around him. He had had sex with people before, but it never felt meaningful. So, right now, in this moment, Edward felt absolutely enamored with the girl below him. His girlfriend. He wanted to show her how much he loved her, and he wanted it to be exactly what she wanted it to be. He wasn't the type to listen to anyone, but he would do anything y/n asked. He would do anything for his angel.
"E-Eddie...I'm ready, please." She panted.
Edward nodded, slowly pulling back and pushing inside of her. Each thrust was gentle and loving, not wanting to be too harsh with her. Y/n moaned underneath him, tightening around him as he kept a steady pace. Scratching at his back, y/n groaned.
"I want it faster, please!" She pleaded.
Edward knew he was going slow, but he was worried about hurting her. Moaning, he picked up his pace, hips slapping against hers. Y/n continued to moan underneath him, begging and crying for more. She wanted it faster and harder. Propping himself up on both of his hands, he hovered over her.
"Are you sure, angel? I don't want to hurt you."
"Eddie, I'm sure. Please, I wanna cum! Please! I need you so bad, Eddie please..." She whined, her voice desperate and pitiful.
He let out a guttural groan as he reared back and rutted up into her. Edward watched as her eyes rolled back, scratching at his shoulder blades. His mouth opened slightly as he maintained his harsh pace, whimpering at the sound of her moans and whines.
"Oh f-f-fuck!" Y/n cried out.
"Y-You like this? Does it f-feel good, angel?"
"Oh, fuck, yes d-daddy!"
Edward's eyes widened, a pathetic moan leaving his lips. That name sounded so sinful leaving her mouth. It was laced with a sweet honey that Edward couldn't get enough of. Moaning, he grabbed her hips and quickened his pace.
"I-I'm g-gonna...I think I'm..." She gasped.
"That's good, angel. I'll get you there. H-How do you wanna cum, baby?" He asked in between sloppy thrusts.
"M-Mouth..." Was all she said.
Edward pulled out of her, dropping to his knees off the bed. He pulled her close to him, cupping his mouth over her pussy. Lapping hungrily at her core, he buried his tongue inside of her. Y/n moaned, arching her back as she gripped at his hair. Pulling away, Edward put a finger inside of her, curling it inside of her.
"That's it, cum for me baby. You've got it..." He cooed.
As if on command, y/n let out a loud and erotic moan as her orgasm washed over her. She whimpered as Edward swallowed every bit of her climax, not wanting to waste a single drop. It smeared over his face as he buried his face between her thighs. He acted like he hadn't eaten food in weeks, and her arousal was the only sustenance he could get. It went down his throat like a sweet honey and he wanted more and more. But when there was no more, he pulled away, a string of saliva from her pussy attached to his bottom lip. It broke as he stood up and looked down at y/n. The sight of her naked and run through was enough to bring him to his own orgasm. He groaned, bending over and gripping onto the sheets for stability as he pumped his hot load into the condom. Panting, he let it ride out, a shiver running down his spine when it went away. Pulling the condom off, he tied it and tossed it in the waste bin near y/n's night stand. His glasses were fogged up and he was breathing heavily. Using his fingers, he cleared his glasses and leaned down, kissing the top of y/n's head.
"Ok, I'm gonna pick you up now. Is that ok?" He asked.
She nodded, holding out her arms so it was easier for him. Y/n wasn't the only one who was utterly exhausted from the events that played out. Grunting, Edward placed y/n on the counter top in her bathroom. Grabbing a wash cloth, he dampened it and gently wiped away her climax off his face. After that, he cleaned off the arousal and spit that was smeared over her thighs. Once that was done, he left washed his hands. While he did this, he yawned.
"Make sure you go to the bathroom, ok?"
"M'kay, Eddie."
"I'm gonna get you a new pair of underwear. I'll wait in bed for you, angel. I just want to make sure you're taken care of first." He said.
Leaving the bathroom, Edward closed the door behind him. Grabbing his boxers, he put them back on. Yawning, he didn't even bother with trying to find his tank top as he went to y/n's dresser. Opening different drawers, he looked until he found the one with y/n's underwear. He was surprised to see she had lacey panties, but he didn't pick one of those. Looking through, found one pair that looked like it would be the most comfortable. He grabbed y/'s shirt from off the floor and placed them on the bed. He groaned, realizing that he needed to brush his teeth.
"Hey angel, I'm going to brush my teeth again ok?"
"Wow, did I taste that bad?" She joked.
"Haha." He mumbled to himself as he went to his bedroom.
He was quick with brushing his teeth, wanting to get under the covers with y/n. Rinsing his mouth out of the toothpaste, he left his room and came back to y/n's. He was happy to see that she put on the clothes he laid out and got in bed. He closed the bedroom door behind him.
"Do you sleep with those lights on?" He asked, gesturing to the fairy lights that hung around her room.
She nodded. Edward smiled and turned off the main bedroom light, leaving the fairy lights on. Feeling cold, he was quick to get in bed behind y/n, drawing her close to his chest. She turned around, nuzzling into his chest.
"That was amazing, Edward." Y/n smiled.
"I'm really glad I could do that for you, y/n. I wanted it your first time to be special."
"Well, it was. You made me feel so comfortable. You talked me through the whole thing, I really appreciated that. I was super nervous."
"Of course I guided you through it, I wasn't going to leave you in the dark."
"You're so sweet..."
"By the way, no, you did not taste bad. Quite the opposite actually." He hummed.
"Yeah, you were acting like it was a four course meal." She giggled.
"Uh, cause it was. Speaking of, I didn't get any desert. Can I snack on a couple of your fingers? I'll leave you your pinkies." He joked, opening his mouth, about to put her fingers in his mouth.
"What?! No! You weirdo!" She laughed, snatching her hand away from him.
He scoffed, rolling on his back and staring at the ceiling. Crossing his arms over his chest, he mumbled to himself, pretending to be mad. Y/n rolled her eyes, resting her head on his bare chest. Humming, he stroked her hair.
"Fine. I won't eat your fingers. Yet..."
"Mmm, well give me a heads up when you're about to, ok? I'd like to say good bye to them." He said.
"Are you really that attached to your fingers?" He asked.
"Yeah, why wouldn't I? They let me grab things."
"True. That's a good point. Well, how about I just give a you a kiss. I think that'll be a good desert."
"Hmm, I guess that's ok." She giggled.
Edward rolled his eyes as he kissed her gently. Humming to himself, he held her close to him, rubbing her back. She sighed, warmth flooding her body as he embraced her. Both of their eyes grew heavy as they felt comfort in each other's presence.
"I love you, Eddie."
"I love you too, y/n."
~
#writers#fanfic writer#writers of tumblr#fanfic#the riddler#dc universe#paul dano#dano riddler#danonation#paul dano riddler#edward nashton#batman 2022
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𝜗𝜚 .𖥔 ݁ ˖ 𝐀𝐁𝐎𝐔𝐓 𝐌𝐄 !
— hii ! if you haven’t caught on . . . i go by covielle, n i’m an ‘05 liner from the uk who does very, very self indulgent writing in her free time ! which is barely any time . so consider it a miracle if i post once a week . . . i’m vv spontaneous .
if we’re moots , or close friends , u can call me elle !
tbf, i’ve wanted to start a blog for a while but i got rlly lazy and couldn’t be bothered to make a theme . . . then i remembered mafuyu existed !! her cards r so pretty omfff
your local , probably unhealthily obsessed scaramouche stan . i have read his multiple wiki pages back to front to soak in all of his lore , alongside religiously watching depressive edits of kabukimono which made me wallow in sadness.
also a girl who literally spends all her money on vapes , alcohol ( i highly recommend dragon soop after a long week ) , and kpop albums . n YES ! i know vaping is bad but take one good look at my ass and conclude if i give a fuck.
in general , i’m a super shy ( wink wink ) person , once you get to know me i’m the largest yapper you’ll ever see . . but at first i physically cannot hold a conversation.
i’m a stay, engene, moa, bunny, MY, onedoor and villain . . my top songs from them are side effects - stray kids , drunk-dazed - enhypen , opening sequence - txt , gods - nwjns , ænergy - aespa , one and only - boynextdoor and zzz.. - xdinary heroes !
i’m severely hyperfixated on dottore’s segments, fatui harbingers, yakshas n the dragon sovereigns . ask me about them and i will ramble for days .
absolute, pure, ayesha erotica whore , finding her in 2016 was the best time of my life . . . probably not suitable for an 11 year old at the time , though . . .
random trivia ⨾
my alias covielle is quite obviously not my real name . . i got it from the commedia dell’arte ! the fact that the commedia coviello can supposedly play the mandarin is so ironic ‘cause my uncle tried to teach me the mandarin when i was like 10 n i remember failing so hard . . .
teehee i also named my very self insert genshin oc after covielle/coviello from commedia . . hhhsgsh i love the fatui !
i spent over 1000 quid on one of my genshin accounts ONLY TO forget the login once i changed my pc.
i struggle to read mangas . . or anything really . i finished watching jjk , and i’ve been trying to read the manga for a good 3 months . . . chat i’m only on chapter 12 vol 2 . i don’t have the attention span and i cannot FOR THE LIFE OF ME read the panels correctly.
i’m in the 2% of genshin players who have genuinely explored the desert . . . i have it maxxed . i swear i’m sane .
i luve love luvvv the idea of dottore’s segments being named after the greek alphabet . . . theta is webttore canon
#〃┆— me me me ! ༉‧₊˚.#the gorgeous girl @ the top is hanni from newjeans ! not me#i’ll finish this later im genuinely dying
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the way i have so many Opinions on deathnote: romance edition but REFUSE to post them bc I'm too soft to get ripped apart by tumblr dot com, so they'll just live in me & crista's chat instead 😔
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“Your eyes are so pretty,” DemonAnkh~
G U R L!!
Any time I can write about these two being disgustingly cute I will do it!! =D
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Even after months had gone by, Demon still wasn’t accustomed to turning over and seeing the face of his beautiful husband resting peacefully beside him. He smiled and gently stroked Vinneketh’s cheek, watching intently as those emerald eyes opened and focused on him. “Mm..good morning, my Beloved~”
“Good morning, my Treasure~ How wonderful it still is to wake up to those pretty eyes of yours gazing at me~”
“How sweet you are~ Is Ayesha awake yet?”
“I don’t think so. I don’t hear her.”
“Good~” He placed his hands on Demon’s shoulders and pulled himself closer. “How long has it been since we spent the morning making love~?”
“Couple of weeks, I think~”
“Much too long~”
“Mmmm..I agree~
Vinneketh sighed, feeling his husband’s rumbling purrs against his throat. “Gods..how..I love you so..”
“And I love you~”
~END~
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wowow than-q dawy bb @itoldsunset for the tag! i love doing these 🥺🥺🥺(also ur right rina did deserve a grammy nom but they h8 woc wbk😤)
1. What is the color of your hairbrush? black.
2. Name a food you never eat. i mean i pretty much eat all kinds of food but there’s a lot of things i don’t eat often. if i’m being really picky i’d say i never eat soups but i literally love pho and seaweed soup so idk 🤷♀️
3. Are you typically too warm or too cold? too coooold 🥶
4. What were you doing 45 minutes ago? crying @ work.
5. What’s your favorite candy bar? kit-kat and aero bars were my shit as a kid but i also love any chocolate bar with hazelnuts.
6. Have you ever been to a professional sports game? uhhhh does figure skating count?
7. What is the last thing you said out loud? i yelled to myself in my room because i work remotely & work was being a lil bitch today.
8. What is your favourite ice cream? mint choco chip or the chocolate covered almond vanilla häagen-dazs 👌🏼
9. What was the last thing you had to drink? water.
10. Do you like your wallet? actually no!!! my fave wallet broke years ago but i was still using it even though it didn’t zip up and i was always dropping coins. and then my brother got me an expensive wallet when i moved back to van but it’s literally so ugly and i only use it because i h8 being wasteful 😤😩
11. What is the last thing you ate? cereal for lunch. i was lazy :(((
12. Did you buy any new clothes last weekend? no. i haven’t really left my house at all much the last few months, only for grocery shopping.
13. What’s the last sporting event you watched? again, figure skating?
14. What is your favorite flavor of popcorn? i always ask for the cheddar or salt and vinegar seasoning.
15. Who is the last person you sent a text message to? the gc on kakao.
16. Ever been camping? like a handful of times in my life. as expected, i do not do well in the outdoors lol.
17. Do you take vitamins? i mean i should probably be taking them :((( she deficient lmao.
18. Do you regularly attend a place of worship? nope.
19. Do you have a tan? she pale af rn because of quarantine 😔
20. Do you prefer chinese or pizza? omg....... this is....... the hardest thing i’ve ever had to answer dkjfnkdjnfdk
21. Do you drink your soda through a straw? only if i’m given one.
22. What color socks do you usually wear? black.
23. Do you ever drive above the speed limit? when i do drive, yeah. i’m scared of going too fast 😩
24. What terrifies you? this is too deep, fam.
25. Look to your left, what do you see? my empty cereal bowl from lunch lol.
26. What chore do you hate most? floors!!! i’m weird i hate the simple tasks like i LOVE bleaching shit i will bleach my life away.
27. What do you think of when you hear an Australian accent? not as triggering as the british accent lmaooo australians r turnt.
28. What’s your favorite soda? i’m gonna sound so bougie but those italian san pellegrino sodas the aranciata (orange) is a classic but the aranciata rossa (blood orange) is soooooo goOd.
29. Do you go in a fast food place or just hit the drive thru? if i’m in a car i like to avoid ppl lol.
30. What’s your favorite number? i don’t have one.
31. Who’s the last person you talked to? my roommate when i came out of my room for lunch.
32. Favorite meat? like i love beef but go absolutely fERAL for a good pork belly (@dawy a woman of taste)
33. Last song you listened to? my wife’s new song (meg thee stallion - body)
34. Last book you read? i’m bi i don’t read 💩
35. Favorite day of the week? at the moment? none lmao.
36. Can you say the alphabet backwards? no.
37. How do you like your coffee? i don’t 😌
38. Favorite pair of shoes? i have these like white/green reebok aztreks and they’re srsly so comfy i wear them with everything.
39. Time you normally get up? i wake up at 8 for work. on the other two days i’m at school, i try to wake up early but that never happens and i always miss my first lecture and wake up at 1 lmao 😗✌🏼
40. What do you prefer, sunrise or sunsets? sunsets because i can’t wake up early but also i prefer night time to morning.
41. How many blankets on your bed? gotta have my sheet, my comforter, and since it’s winter i pulled out the ethnic blanket for extra toasty~
42. Describe your kitchen plates. random. they’re my roommate’s.
43. Describe your kitchen at the moment. there is absolutely NO counter space but also that’s probably because we have 2 rice cookers & i wouldn’t change it for anything RICE IS LYFE✌🏼
44. Do you have a favorite alcoholic drink? i’m basic so my go-to is gin and tonic. with lemon AND lime 😩👌🏼
45. Do you play cards? not like poker or anything but i play a mean speed and go fish lmao.
46. What color is your car? lol
47. Can you change a tire? wtf lol no don’t @ me i don’t have my full license yet u don’t need to drive in the city when the train is so much faster!!!
48. Your favorite state or province? west coast best coast 🤪
49. Favorite job you’ve had? tawan’s trophy wife. kidding. that’s not a job i do it for free ayeee 😌💅 uhhhhhh i literally h8 capitalism so UHM my inner socialist is telling me none but i miss my comrades co-workers at my old starbs job 😔✊🏼
tagging!🌈💕✨: jay @metawin, ayesha @gremlinmetawin, cass @wavelovespang, doreen @gunsatthaphan, rae @zaintseeme, dez @thehuns-bubble-tea, emily @seekingstarlightinthecity, cata @gigiesarocha, sam @khaotungthanawat, orthy @teepakornaekaranwong & anyone else who wants to can tag me!! (im starting to forget everyone’s @s because y’all change too damn much— nvm that i literally just changed mine lmao)
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Ayesha Liveblogs Cardcaptor Sakura S2-S3
“If you had called me, I would have fixed it for you” Get u a man who wants to fix ur bike’s flat tires
“I wonder which teacher will be in charge of us this year” I’m going to hazard a guess that it’s the one that you keep having prophetic dreams about battling in the moonlight
“Ms. Mizuki is kind, is pretty and she makes me all dreamy” lmao @ this criteria for justifying whether ur sensei is up to no good
U know, Sakura melting like 10 feet of snow bc she lost a present from her crush is exactly the type of emotions I expect from these preteens
Syaoran liking Sakura is also very funny because she’s very observant of other people so it’s like [Syaoran blushing and glancing at Sakura] [Sakura glancing back in befuddlement]
“But when you do, it means you’ll see him as well” WILL U STOP THIS OMINOUS MOONSHADOWING
Does EVERYTHING Mizuki says have to be some kind of prophecy
Syaoran is really just becoming progressively more infatuated and embarrassed with every scene
“You’re always watching over Sakura, aren’t you?” Tomoyo doesn’t need a voice to call people out LOL
You see this is exactly my point what is the reason for having a voice card if you have a song card or vice versa what’s your logic Clow
LMAO I SHOULD’VE KNOWN:
Sakura: Why r u both here
Toya: It’s Take Your Boyfriend to Work Day
“Sakura is cheerful as usual today” “That’s all she has going for her” Very older brother kind of statement
That shot of Syaoran showing his strawberries to Yukito (and Sakura, by extension) cutting to Toya, cutting to Ms. Mizuki.... the interpersonal dynamics at play here
“You know her from before, right?” THAT’S ONE WAY TO PUT IT
**Go to jail Mizuki
“I’ll tell you in a little while” Toya is not prepared to have discussion about his Relationship History at this time
I mean I’m not an expert but isn’t Sakura’s main magical item a key wouldn’t that help with this Lock situation
YFDHSKHFKJSHFK Mizuki could you be more threatening
I assume the wind will cover up the noise of this loud magical chant
“Don’t tell dad I have a fever” 😭😭😭😭😭 Sakura you’re so little someone needs to take care of you
“If I do [stay home], I’ll trouble everyone else” SAKURAAAA 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
“It was about Sakura” TOYA’S BIG BROTHER MODE ACTIVATED
LOL TOYA’S SUSPICIOUS GLANCES ARE EVERYTHING JHDJKHFKJ HE CAN SENSE THE “GHOST” IN KERO
Well if the living plush toy didn’t give it away, the fact that Toya has already met and identified Mirror as a ghost will
Ddfhjkdhfkj Toya didn’t even pause he was just like [Sigh] ‘Guess I’m gonna feed a ghost now’
“I have a vague idea of what she’s up to” OH MY GOD TOYAAAAAA
Awww Meilin holding Sakura up to capture the Clow Card you know what that is? Growth
This kind of domestic shopping nonsense is the shenanigans I NEED
Syaoran is physically winded from running away from his feelings
OMG STOP THESE PRE-TEEN DREAMS ARE SO CORNY AND GREAT LMAO @ SYAORAN FANTASIZING ABOUT HIM AND SAKURA BEING THE LEADS IN A MOVIE TOGETHER WITH HIM GIVING THE CLOW CARDS AS A SUBSTITUTE FOR A WEDDING RING
Gljlgkdjlkgjlkf I still cannot believe they let 11-year-olds roam this freely they don’t need an adult to BOARD A TRAIN??
“They’re foretelling dreams” So if we believe this, here are the future facts:
1. Sakura’s gonna do a fashion show for Tomoyo
2. Syaoran is going to give Sakura all the Clow Cards and maybe propose
3. Yukito and Toya will definitely know Kero is a living creature and they’re gonna be chill with it
4. Normal battle prophecy stuff
“Seeing Ms. Mizuki... it makes me all dreamy”
*Sakura really only crushes on people that her older brother had feelings for first this is like when I was into Yugioh and Beyblade bc my brother was into them first
**Go to jail Mizuki
“I don’t want to be the prince” Will u want to if it’s u and Sakura tho
This was pointed foreshadowing I could not have predicted
[Chanting] ALL DRAG FAIRSTYLES ALWAYS
“I just woke up” u LIAR Toya you wanted to make your baby sister breakfast
SYAORAN WHERE WERE YOU EVEN KEEPING THAT BIG OLE MAGICAL SWORD TASSLE
YESSSSSSSSSSSSSS TEAMWORK COMBO ATTACK WE LOVE A PARTNERSHIP OF POWERS
“Isn’t that a guy playing the Queen” are you in any place to make a judgment Toya
“Please, seal us together” Light and Dark confirmed as Lesbian Icons
“The final decision rests with Yue, but please do your best” LMAO IS THE REASON THAT YUKITO IS ALWAYS CHILL HANGING OUT WITH HIS FIFTH GRADE BEST FRIENDS IS THAT HE IS SCOUTING THEM OUT FOR YUKITO’S NEXT DRAG SUPERHERO
U know if I did not have very hazy memories of who Yue is I could be tricked into thinking it was Mizuki lol (but then again TSUKIshiro soooooo maybe it’s obvious always lol)
“That bath sponge” “Kero is at Tomoyo’s house” ‘BATHSPONGE’ MEILIN PLS
AW rescuing lost birds turns out Syaoran has always been a sweetheart
Meilin finally gets to use her martial arts skills and help again!! Good for her
“I’m your fiancee until you find the girl you like the most” Not to put a damper on ur cousin marriage dream (stop) but that ship has sailed twice over Meilin
“There’s another person” WELL WELL WELL HOW THE TURN TABLES MOON MAN
“Being with you is rather useful when capturing Clow Cards” is Syaoran’s way of saying “<3 <3 <3″
Syaoran is really conflicted bc he likes Yukito and he likes Sakura but when Sakura likes Yukito he wants her to like him instead this is truly a broad range of emotions for Fifth Grade Romance
Ddfjhdskfhk Kero looks so serious scouting out the intentions of the Toya’s Magical Exes Club but his face is like “>:[”
“You’re the one that uses the powers of the moon” What does this MEAN that’s supposed to be Yukito???? I am confused
“There’s no such thing as a coincidence...” “...There’s only inevitability” So now Toya’s joining the prophecy game? This is A Lot
Omg I do love the big lion version of Kero I forgot what he looked like
OHHHHHHHHHHHHHH BIIIIIIIIIIIITCCCCHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
“Too lenient as always” “And your personality is as bad as always” I don’t think I care for Magical Yukito he’s being a little harsh
“He completely cuts all ties between his disguise and his consciousness, so that the candidate doesn’t sense him until the Last Judgment” so his subconscious just happened to feel like being a 17-year-old boy who wanted to date Sakura’s brother LOL
DON’T BE A BITCH YUE YOU’RE FIGHTING AN ELEVEN-YEAR-OLD WHO PERCEIVES YOU AS SOMEONE SHE CARES ABOUT
Oh my god NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO I DON’T WANT ANYONE TO FORGET WHO THEY LOVE
This is so fucked up kjhgkfhdg Sakura’s family forgetting her mother, Sakura and Toya forgetting Yukito, Tomoyo forgetting about caring about Sakura, Syaoran forgetting about caring about Sakura ahhhhhhhhhhh
WELL WELL WELL MS. MIZUKI CAME THRU THANKS WEIRDO
**Still jail tho
OH SHIT NEW MAGICAL STAFF I LOVE THIS AHHHHHHHHH
“I want you to be friends with me, nothing like Masters or stuff like that” SAKURAAAAAA
“You knew that Mr. Tsukishiro wasn’t a human” “Yeah” TOYA WHAT!!!
The fact that Yukito doesn’t know his other half is kind of a bitch has very Yami Bakura energy I can’t believe what I needed in my life was Yugioh but less Heterosexual
iii
“If you leave that early, Yuki won’t be there yet” So... is Toya just chill with the fact his boyfriend is the moon
I don’t want Syaoran to leave!!! He is a sweetheart and I love him
“He seems like a nice boy” is thiiis the rude boy I remember from watching this when I was a kid bc ngl I was confused when Syaoran was nice bc I remember someone being a little shit
“I didn’t mean to surprise you” said Eriol, after popping out suddenly from behind a tree
Syaoran said ‘I will only share Sakura’s affection with one (1) boy and that is Yukito’
“I’m not going back. I’ll be here for a while.” I can’t tell if this is a New Magical Person thing or a ‘I love my friends and don’t want them to forget me’ thing
DHJKGHKJHG this random girl just clinging to Toya’s back and eyeing Yukito like “WHATCHA GONNA DO ABOUT IT MISTER”
I guess since Meilin’s gone Nakuru’s going to fulfill the role of Unrequited Crush Gal Who Cannot Read The Emotional Room
Clow Reed really appearing to just throw Sakura’s entire life in disarray
“This is the first chance to film you in a while!” Tomoyo you have filmed Sakura going strawberry-picking and playing whack-a-mole since when do u need an excuse lmao
“I don’t think we made plans like that” again Toya since when do u and Yukito need plans aren’t you together like 22/7
Syaoran refuses to show Sakura that he’s feeling anything beyond blushing and yet he gets mad when other people are more forthright with their emotions and honestly what a teen mood
“I.. you” rude I can’t tell if Nakuru interrupted a love confession or a I Know You’re the Moon confession but either way rude
“You don’t know? Then I’ll take him” WHAT DO U MEAANNN THAT’S NOT HOW IT WORKS
“Eriol is a kind person” [Thor meme voice] Is he though?
As much as the jury is still out on Yue I really do love these magical girl transformations
These group meet ups have gotten even less subtle you might be able to hide some cosplay and a plush toy but a full grown man and a lion with wings??? Gjkghkjdhgk how did they get to Penguin Park with no one noticing
There is some satisfaction in there finally being an adult (or at least a kind-of-18-year-old) on their team
Oh my god??? OH MY GOD? WHAT A POWER-UP I LOVE IT SAKURA GETTING HER OWN CHANTS AND CARDS GOOD FOR HERRRR
Poor Toya it’s worrisome when ur baby sis is a magical superhero
It’s interesting and hilarious that Yukito’s appetite is proportional to his alter ego’s use of magic
“Because she’s like you” Toya IS trying to tell Yuki that he’s a moon person awwwwwwww
If we’ve learned anything from Tomoyo’s choir recitals it’s just that perhaps singing is more dangerous than any of these kids would prefer it to be
Nakuru aside from the fact I’m pretty sure you’re a new Big Bad leave Toya alone he doesn’t want to be touched and he’s with someone already
I like that no matter how many times Yamazaki lies, Sakura always takes it in good faith
I have given up on this show having anyone have a normal relationship with their teacher (except Wei who has done nothing wrong ever in his life)
“I’m sure that the person you like is happy” shout-out to Tomoyo for being semi-well-adjusted I guess
“The kid is being controlled by something” GUESS WHO JUST BOUGHT STRINGS FOR PUPPETS IT’S SUSPICIOUS NEW KID
If I know my shojo manga tropes it seems like this Friend vs. Friend battle is going to lead to a Hug of Passionate Restraint
Psych it was a Hug of We Are Tired From Magical Force
Who are you British Bitch Boy with your Bitch Cat haven’t they been through enough
“I’m surprised you’ve held out this long without a single bite” do NOT eat TOYA
“And I’m not a human in the first place, so gender doesn’t really matter” I am so tired of anime creating non-binary characters only to make them evil and/or inhuman blah
I DON’T CARE FOR ANY OF THIS WE DON’T NEEEED AN EVIL ELEVEN-YEAR-OLD AND AN EVIL KERO AND AN EVIL YUE NOBODY ASKED
“Why did I buy this thing anyway” u know why Syaoran
LMAO YUKITO DRINKING OUT OF A FULL SIZE MILK CARTON KILLS ME
“The only times I turn red or feel like my heart will explode is when I see him” Incredible it has taken Syaoran like... 18 episodes to realize his feelings for Sakura. Bisexuality be like that sometimes
SCREAMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM DID YUE COME OUT JUST TO GIVE SYAORAN BACK HIS TEDDY BEAR
“The reason why you are confused when you see Yukito is because of the magic powers from the Moon that you feel from Yukito” did Yue just say ‘ur not bi ur just confused’ kjhkjdhdgkj Yue confirmed for biphobic
Really how many things does Eriol have to ruin before Sakura realizes he’s evil? The piano.... thread... a teddy bear
OMGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG SAKURA HAS WINGS IT’S A REAL MAGICAL GIRL TRANSFORMATION AFTER ALL
You know if Elementary School Clow is NOT evil this is a really fucked up way to be teaching a lesson
Toya come help ur boy Yukito is exhausted and he doesn’t know why :(
Ahhhhhhhh this tree leaning scene is the exact and only thing I remembered about the interactions between these two before watching this now
“I don’t want you to disappear” THE ROMANCE RETURNS
“Are you doing this on purpose” Toya has had it up to here with his confessions being interrupted
BOOO Toya was right I don’t want Yue-kito to disappear either
“There is someone suited to this, but Yukito...” KJHGKJDHGJHDKJ IS TOYA GONNA BECOME THE SOURCE OF YUE’S MAGICAL POWER I’D DIE
“You knew this would happen if you called Tomoyo” I mean... Kero’s right
I don’t know that Erase in particular was necessary for the sheep but it does make me giggle to see Sakura lift playground structures
I was gonna say I’d wager ten dollars something happens to that bike after Eriol touches it but then I remembered this episode is called “Sakura and the Panicky Bike” so it’s not really even worth betting
Of course your family members are going to worry if you suddenly develop magical narcolepsy Sakura
I LOVE that Toya’s magical powers seem to be developing more as well
I feel like not enough people are giving Sakura credit for the fact she is like 11? She hasn’t had a lot of time to work on this stuff
“I can’t let [the cards becoming ordinary] happen! I finally got to be friends with all of them” 😭😭😭😭😭 Sakura’s good heart always gets me
“What are you going to do?” SHE’S GONNA PUT HERSELF IN A MAGICAL COMA
Cell phones are a hilarious addition to the plot and I love that they are like top of the line bc it’s the 90s lmao and that Li is include in the phone tree
“If you collapse, I’ll catch you” KERO NO. 1 SAKURA STAN (tied with Tomoyo and Syaoran)
Lmao these siblings would be born on a Leap Day and April Fool’s respectively
SCREAM at least it’s on brand for Eriol to be a pathological liar (also RIP Sakura and Syaoran for their gullibility still)
TOYA PLAYING HIS MOTHER’S SONG REST IN PIECES MY HEART
Sdkhkhkjdhkd Toya failed confession count: 4 this time feat emotional piano ballad
Also also I will say it’s not like Yuki doesn’t come to your house VERY frequently Toya couldn’t you just tell him what you need to say the numerous times he is visiting or going with you to school
Oh hey! I share a birthday with Sakura’s great-grandfather that’s funny
“Nadeshiko was only 16 years old” YEAH SO WHY ARE YOU APOLOGIZING GRANDPA UR NOT THE ONE TRYING TO DATE TEENS U R TEACHING
I know Kero being seen on the TV is for giggles but the implication that magic makes you playable on VCR... incredible
I want to know what Toya’s gift was!!!
Hahaha I guess that the Alice and Wonderland size-shifting would have more of an impact on Sakura’s empathy than most people
“Two-thirds of all cats on earth right now are aliens” I mean... if we go by the cats we have met in this show.... Yamazaki’s right
“Actually, I have a rather mischievous personality” NO KIDDING ERIOL
“Where are you going” “To where the queen is” I will DIE if the Queen is Toya but I assume the Queen of Hearts will be Sakura’s mother actually since that’s the kind of anime trope that u should expect
Yue dropping Sakura like a hot potato is a little funny he can stay
What is more ridiculous Syaoran hiding the sword behind his back or the fact it worked
“Then... it’s not Yukito?” that was one whole crush ago keep up Sakura
“I am the Queen” WELL THAT’S NOT WHAT I WAS EXPECTING AT ALL KJFHGKJHGJHGJKFHG
Current list of things that Eriol has ruined: Pianos, threads, teddy bears, sheep plushies, bikes, leaves,
The transition to Eriol’s deep adult voice always trips me up
“Don’t hug me” “I’m going to hug you” Respect! Toya’s! Boundaries! Nakuru!!!!!!!!!!!
LOL @ Spinel’s drunken tirades I won’t lie I love this erratic behaviour
Guess Syaoran is over his Yukito crush for real but boy cannot stop running away from his feelings for Sakura poor guy
AWWWW THIS TEDDY BEAR MONTAGE OF SYAORAN BEING AT PEACE WITH HOW HE FEELS NOW
LMAO DID ERIOL JUST TRAP THESE TWO IN AN ELEVATOR TO WORK OUT THEIR INTERPERSONAL PROBLEMS THIS SHOW IS IN SUCH A WEIRD EMOTIONAL PLACE
“I’m glad for you,” said Eriol/Clow, who has repeatedly mildly traumatized these kids but seems to be like ‘it all evens out if I do some preteen matchmaking’
“Hey, can I call you Syaoran too?” Awwwwwwwwwwww that’s cute also it’s wild that in the pacing of this show despite like probably at least thirty episodes of them being friends THIS is the first ep (Ep 57!!!) that they address each other by first name
HJGJHGDHGFHJG AMAZING HOW IS SAKURA GOING TO HIDE A FULL GROWN MAN (WHO SHARES A BODY WITH THE PERSONALITY HER BROTHER LIKES!) AND A WINGED LION IN HER BEDROOM
OHJFKJSDHFKJSHDKJFHKJHFKJHKJHDKJHF I CANNOT CONVEY THE COMEDY OF THIS MOMENT IN WORDS SO:
“So that even if [my dad] was reincarnated, he would still fall in love with [my mom]” Interesting reveal that Yue was actually in love with Clow (makes sense; he’s the ‘I’m gay I’m homophobic we exist’ meme) but the only romance I will accept for Yue is if he ends up in a Greedlingfan-esque triad with Yukito and Toya and that’s that on that
Poor Yukito he must think he’s going nuts he just appears places with no memories
Well this is hardly a fair match up Syaoran can’t be expected compete with a reincarnated ancient wizard
GOOOOOD WHY DOES ERIOL DELIVER HIS CRYPTIC MESSAGES OF ADVICE THROUGH SPORTS GAMES
“It feels more like [Eriol] is watching over someone very dear to him” Tomoyo correctly discerns that Eriol is the bearer of fucked up magic lessons
Wow Tomoyo is really here to talk Syaoran through a whole journey of emotions
“I.. you...” OH MY GOD SYAORAN AND TOYA START THEIR CONFESSIONS IN THE SAME WAY JHHJSGFDSGJH WOW
It’s okay Syaoran you did your best no one in your immediate social group can finish a confession it seems
“You were trying so hard so hard to confess your love for Sakura last night” Tomoyo really doesn’t pull any punches when it comes to her romantic pep talks huh
Awww Syaoran wants to tell Meilin how he feels about Sakura first
Uh oh post-battle Meilin has taken note of Syaoran and Sakura’s use of each other’s first names
“If something happens, please think of me” AWWW Tomoyo looking out for Meilin’s feelings that’s my girl
“What makes me even madder is that I still can’t grow to hate Ms. Kinomoto” awww Meilin
“You’re a tardy little monster” suspicious Toya is one of the best parts of this show
The fact that Sakura doesn’t think Toya knows because he’s not making fun of her... tru sibling energy
Failed confession count:
Toya: 5...6
Syaoran: 2
TOYA IS SUCH A SWEETHEART BUYING PRESENTS FOR THE CARD THAT PROTECTS SAKURA AHHHHHHHHH AND OMG HOW DOES HE KNOW WHAT MIRROR LOOKS LIKE
Sakura loves the cards and the cards love her I love one (1) Cardcaptor
“But now, he helps me out a lot” “That’s why I don’t like him” AWWW TOYA
“I will see you again in your dreams tonight” could you be a bit less creepy Eriol
OH NO CURSE OF THE DISAPPEARING BOYFRIEND TOYA YOU GOTTA HUG THE MAGIC BACK INTO YUKI
Tomoyo is an impeccable wingman for Syaoran she has had his back at every step
WE LOVE A POOL PARTY EP YEEHAW
"I don’t ever want you to disappear” Toya’s declarations are getting more passionate with each failed confession (also I see that when he grabs Yuki’s wrist he stops fading)
“If you use magic in here, you don’t know who might see you” so they’ll notice her hiding behind a half rock wall but somehow a glowing waterslide will escape their notice???
“If Sakura had used her card any later than when she did, you were going to stop your magic” I feel like that is the LEAST Eriol could do
“Do you dislike swimming now” OH HOW NICE TO CHECK IN WITH RIKA AFTER YOU ALMOST DROWN HER
“You’re just lacking experience now. I’m sure that you will be able to do it. Skiing... and other things.” “You said that before! What does that MEAN” Syaoran is tired of Eriol’s Cryptic Sports Advice too
Dghgfjdgfjhg Sakura crossing herself in preparation for hearing a scary story lmao
Current failed confession counts:
Toya: 7
Syaoran: 3
Eriol confirms he will not kill preteens in an avalanche just to teach them magic I guess they had to draw the line somewhere
“I know the truth... that in reality you are...” Does it count as a failed confession if it’s for a scene?? Also are they the leads of this student film bc if so wow
“I know what’s really going on. That you are...” Well we’re definitely up to 8 now
:(((((((((((( It really hurts Toya to see Yukito like this SAVE HIIIIIIIIM
“At this rate, Toya’s important thing will be taken away” like what his love virginity LMAO
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH IT’S HAPPENING THE FACE TOUCHING THE REVEAL HFDUHFKJHFJDHFKJHDJGHJKHGJHG
“If I don’t see you, I can’t give you what I want to give you” a kiss?? LOL
“I want you to protect Sakura, and also protect yourself” OH OH OH
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH TOYA YOU’RE SO SELF-SACRIFICING THIS IS SO SWEET U WANT TO PROTECT UR SISTER AND THE LOVE OF UR LIFE SO UR GIVING UP SOMETHING THAT’S A PART OF YOU THE MELANCHOLY THE INTIMACY I’M WEEPING
“It’s obvious that you, a child, can’t support all of it” Ahhhhhhhhhh so many reveals at once poor Sakura, Toya was only helping
In truth I did not think the power exchange would happen all at once I thought it would be like recurring boyfriend whack-a-mole:
Yukito, sleepy: I’m off to battle
Toya: K bye Yuki [intimate embrace]
Yue: [Catches sleepy Toya]
“I want Yukito to know my true feelings” I mean I’m gonna tell you right now Sakura I think he’s in love with your brother and also you’re like 11 but u do u I guess
“It doesn’t matter what you are. As long as you don’t disappear and are at my side, I don’t care about anything else” Toya ur so romantic
“I’m all right. Just a little sleepy.” Oh how the narcolepsy turntables.....
I know all I want to talk about is Toya right now but he is so PATIENT and GENTLE with his sister’s feelings god
“But the person that you like the most isn’t me, Sakura” why do both halves of Yukito feel the need to moonsplain people’s feelings to them jkhfgkjjhfjhfjkh
HAHAHAH I was wondering how Yuki was going to handle this preteen love confession and he just went ‘No. Family-zoned.’
“You realized this because you have someone you like the most as well, Yukito?” 👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀
“Is it my big brother?” “Yeah, it is” AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
“Though I think that Toya is my number one, I’m not sure of his feelings” HE GAVE UP HIS MAGICAL POWERS FOR YOU TO BE AROUND HIM FOREVER YUKITO HOW MUCH MORE REASSURANCE DO YOU NEED
Omg the vowing to yell at each other’s future boyfriends khkdhfkdhfs I love this friendship good for them
Eriol really DOES trap people in enclosed spaces to work out their interpersonal problems this reincarnated 11-year-old relationship therapist my god
“But if I cry or make a sad face, I’m sure Yukito would be troubled” poor sad Sakura but also I’m kind of glad she didn’t abide by Yukito like... telling her how she felt? It would’ve felt a little insincere to walk ALL of it back but I think she was mostly doing it so Yukito and Toya could be together in peace
“It’s all right. I’m sure you will find him” SYAORAAAAAAAAAAANNN
Awww Syaoran is so happy about this Grand Gesture scarf <33333333
“I knew that Sakura’s feelings for me weren’t completely the same as her feelings for her father... But I can’t delay her finding her true number one because of her feelings towards me” no shit Yuki but also maybe it was an okay call it gave Sakura a simple out
Toya’s gentle head touch as he gives Yukito reassurance aaaaaah
“He’s going to steal away something that I’ve been cherishing all this time” this is Toya’s weird way of saying he gives Syaoran and Sakura his blessing lol (lot of these blessing going around lately)
Toya’s love language is touching Yuki somewhere from the shoulders up
“I feel like he’s still alive and he’ll come to make fun of us at any moment” ur not wrong Kero
“But I’m still not you, Mr. Clow” U JUST BE URSELF SAKURA!!
What we have learned from this trip to the past so far is that Mr. Clow has always loved to give people cryptic messages and then disappear
I DID NOT EXPECT A MONTAGE OF BLOOMING FLOWERS TO BE WHAT MADE ME SHED A TEAR IN THIS ANIME BUT THE SYMBOLISM - CLOW’S WORDS - SAKURA UR SO GOOD THIS IS A NICE SHOW
“It’s Clow Reed’s fault,” said Clow Reed, eleven years old, about himself
“Why did he have to trouble Sakura so much?!” Kero said FRIENDSHIP ENDED WITH CLOW REED SAKURA IS MY NEW BEST FRIEND
I appreciate that Yue was like, ‘Gotta bring Toya with me to the battle I can’t just leave him in the street’
Sidenote: What made them start running in the first place was it the loss of light or was it just Yukito/Yue going ‘MY SAKURA SENSES ARE TINGLING’
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH FINAL BATTLE KERO VS. SPINNEL, YUE VS. RUBY MOON, SAKURA VS. CLOW???
OH SHIT TRANSFORMING EIGHT CARDS AT ONCE WHAT A POWER UP
Make that six cards but STILL
“Light and Dark are the first cards under our jurisdiction” I AM RIVETED 👀👀👀👀👀👀👀
SCREAM THE TEAM SUN MOON STARS GROUP HUG MY CHEST WILL BURST
OH FINAL WAND!!!!!!!!! MAGICAL FRIENDS EDITION
SYAORAN HELPING HER TRANSFORM THE CARDS TEAMWORK MAKES THE DREAMWORK
“We are friends with you, right Sakura?” KEROOOOOOOO YUEEEEEEEEE 💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖
“I like you” [Cut to classroom] Oh awkward seems like Sakura kind of verbally left Syaoran on read for that one
“Wouldn’t conversation be more pleasant when there are tasty sweets around” Sdfhkjshfkjshfkj unbelievable Eriol-Clow wants to have his final words of wisdom delivered via tea party
“There were a couple of things that happened that weren’t expected by myself or Clow Reed” LOL he means Syaoran and Sakura and also probably Yukito and Toya jhjhdfjkh fair it’s just the never-ending charisma of these siblings
Oh hey Ms. Mizuki what are you doing at this weird tea party (go to jail)
If Mizuki was in college when she met him he was what???? A baby??? How old ARE you Eriol
“You’re not going inside, Yue?” I was WONDERING why Yue wasn’t part of this ridiculous gathering lmao
“But I can talk of old memories... If it suits your fancy, I will talk whenever you want me to” Ahh Eriol trying to provide Yue some closure 😬
WOW ERIOL EXPLICITLY EXPLAINING THAT HE DID NOT EXPECT THE ROMANTIC DYNAMICS AT PLAY JDHJHFDGHKDHGKHDKFJ
Omggg Sakura created a new card for Syaoran ahhhh they’re really very cute
“That bear... Can I have it?” The way these confessions were written is really VERY GOOD
What a WEIRD SHOW but u know it did something to my heart
#ayesha talks anime#ayesha liveblog ccs#might as well post this one too#i did not watch this in a day but i did watch it in a week so what does that say#liveblogging#long post
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ay so ik im probably real late but👀 i’d like to get to know you, if you dont mind? 📺 📻 👾 👻 thanks! heheeee
YAY TY SORRY IM ANWSERING LATE I HAD TO DO THINGS SJSJJSJS
📺: I LOVE TIGER AND BUNNY!!!!!!its my most favorite and S2 is coming out like 2022?????HYPE HYPE HYPE!!!!i love kotetsu sm hes baby and barnaby is king shit😳i wanna talk abt the plot in this but i ain't gonna spoil shit😳😳😳1000000/10 its a good watch!!!!its on hulu and we used to have it on netflix but idk why not now!!!!!(and if ur talking abt show im really liking grimn its weird as shit)
📻: MY FAVORITE SONG RN.....hmmmm artic monkey r u mine(also their song 505) and mother mother hayloft HNMMMMM SHINEE SHIFT IS SO GOOD THO.......i cant decide sjsjsjo ayesha eroticas delicious is sooo good ugh miss u queen💋but all time lows a love like war and paramore decode rings in my ears all the time BUt😩 BUT THEN THERES ALL THESE GORILLAZ SONGS EYE.....DIRTY HARRY IS SO GOOD I LOVE THE RAP PART SM......... anyways i was listening to that basketball basketball shit cover that i think dxd did YEARS AGI HOLY SHIT anytime i come across it i just keep listening to it its horrible but YEAH stream cyber stockholm syndrome by rina sawayama jsjsjs
👾: not necessarily i have no proof of them existing or not existing but FUCK those history channels saying that aliens built them pyramids sjsjs no bitch poc did that stop erasing shit anyways uhm im not against it but damn aliens existing too?????sounds like alotta work sjsjjs
👻: hmmmm the supernatural.......if ur talking abt the "evil ghosts" or whatever thats probably just the shithead devil and his punk ass demon goons doing shit fuck them all anyways uhm idk if they are real or not i dont disbelieve it either cuz ive had my fair share of that typa shit happening in my fam idk how to talk abt it👀👁️👁️ shit like that runs in da family sjsjsjsj anyways if anyone believes in them ill respect it even tho its not my 'religeon' or whatever i believe in is called its just called not being an ass
TY FOR SENDING THE ASK AGAIN SRRY FOR THIS TAKING SO LONG I HAD LOTS TO DO HSHSJSJ🤪🤪🤪😳😳💓❤️💓❤️💓❤️💖💗💖💗💖😭🏃♀️🏃♀️🏃♀️
#asks#long Post#I WISH I COULD DO A CUT ON THIS ILL HAVE TO EDIT IT ON PC#HELL.....#imagine if i was able to talk about all of the crazy shit that has happened around us and infront goddamn its not the time tho#SORRY IF I TYPE WEIRD????LIKE THIS IS HOW I TALK IRL JAJSJ#I HOPE O EXPLAINED THE GHOST ONE WELL ENOUGH IVE JUST UHHH👀👀👀
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i forgot to copy andpste the rules fuckjdjh anwyay taged by @younghyuuns and @pupcats :D thank u guys for tagging me i havent done this in ages
tagging: @minhyukwithagun (just saw ur new icon ffuck) @briwoon and @tokayhk u guys dont have to tho ily all oh also @hyunghoney and @hyungkyunnie and @minhyukt suddenly im tagging everyone u guys dont have to do it either ily toohdjh
last:
drink: water hddhh im so happie to hear everyones answer is water too stay fresh
phone call: ................ oh my mum i was gonna say i dont call ppl but she called the house phone yesterday
text message: ‘what’ jhddsjhjhsh
song you listened to: beside you by 5so/s im wheesinghs falen kdhs
time you cried: really cried??? january on a thursday aka last month i broke down in school djhhsjh schools the place i cry the most i couldnt go through one month without breaking downdjhdhs every year i have 2 cry there at least once apparently jesushdjs
have you ever:
dated someone twice: i havent even dated anyone once
been cheated on: see above
kissed someone and regretted it: see above
lost someone special: immmdmfmmdkks i guess not? in terms of friends they were special but not anymore so i guess that doesnt count
been depressed: nope
been drunk and thrown up: in this house we only drink water
in the past year have you:
made a new friend: heck yeah? i made so many good pals after revamping this blog im so happie :(
fallen out of love: no lol i stopped having this crush on this person at the end of 2016 best decision of my life
laughed until you cried: one too many times but i cant remember any ;-/
met someone who changed you: falen?? but everyone has an effect on mehjd
found out who your true friends are: well . yeah
found out someone was talking about you: idk i dont rememberjhdhjhs i dont care enough
general:
how many people on tumblr do you know in real life?: only karissa and she doenst even use tumblr much ;-/
do you have any pets?: i wish i did D: but not now.. jsjd maybe when im out of this country/place
do you want to change your name?: ifjkksj not rly..??????? i just hated it for a while when i was younger bc i didnt like the nicknames that came with my namejhddh
what time did you wake up this morning: 11am fuck my life
what were you doing last night: giffing :D and then i gave up bc it started messing up so i went to bed
name something you cannot wait for: school to start bc im excited since its a whole new jhhdhsh thng? but im also terrified im learning physics theres a reason why i took biology instead man my course is called biotechnology nothhjjhhjjhsjhhf physics dont interact
have you ever talked to a person named tom?: the only tom i know is tom from tom and jerry
what’s getting on your nerves right now: the gifs
blood type: a emoji
nickname: when ging said her answer i lost my mind how many of you arent using ur real names tf... does ging stand for ginger also this question is about me hold onfjdhhhjshd uh egg and meggan i guess? nutfucker toojhdjhhjdh bc that was my ig name so irl ppl would call me that and embarrass me thanks or just nut because of that username too
relationship status: never dated thank god
zodiac sign: capricorn sun and taurus moon im the .optimum dirt call me soil hdjsh also i showed ayesha my chart and she lost her mind saying the reason why i say oh worm so much is bc im like 50% earth i couldnt stop laughing tumblr install a filter search function in chats i need to dig that up
pronouns: she/her
favorite show: haikyuu i aint gonna stop loving u bitch
college: idk what this means either im not gonna tell yall my school im gonna be doing biotechnology tho trust me i dont know what the fuck that course is about im a fool all i know is that it has to do with cells [changkyun voice] well its cells
hair color: black but i like to think its brown
do you have a crush on someone: crushes and the whole. love game is cursed
what do you like about yourself: i learn... from my mistakes i guess idk also im generally friendly . ...
firsts:
first surgery: none
first piercing: none im a [redacted]
first sport you joined: fucking. golf or swimming or tennis i used to be all about sports now i just. walk
first vacation: probably malaysia
first pair of sneakers: converse which i used to deem as clown shoes ... now all i wear are converse dkhhdshj
right now:
eating: amylase
drinking: nothing i need to drink water im thirsty hold on stay hydrated if ur reading this drink some water
i’m about to: pee i need to go,
listening to: spotify ad time hates me. ill go back to this later oh wait this isnt a spotify ad anymore scavenger by finish ticket who r they? idk either my friend recommends me songs and theyre good but by bands ive never heard of
want kids: no iwnt animals
get married: marriage ? sounds phake
career: ive been saying this since 2016 but farmer
which is better:
lips or eyes: i hate myself i read lips and thought of l** m*nhyuk ;-/ singularity’s impact! and nojhhsjjhdh idk? fucking both i guess ??????? i dont look at peoples faces often
hugs or kisses: depends on the kiss but i love huggingjdhjhd i dont think. id be able to hug certain people tho? which is weird im fine with likejhdhjsjh hugging this person (usually happens when we’re watching movies bc djdkjjs im a [redacted] again so i have to hide my eyes) but i cant imagine myself.. hugging my other friendshjhdh??? idk itd be awkward ig
shorter or taller: taller ! love me that height if ur below 165 cm dont talk to me
older or younger: older ???? or my age idk
romantic or spontaneous: spontaneous im always like this with my friendsjhfhjhdh me: hey lets walk there instead my friends: ready tof ucking kill me
sensitive or loud: a ? a mediudndjs like... an in between
hookup or relationship: preferably nothing but relationship of coursehjhd
troublemaker or hesitant: an inbetween jjdshjshd?? idk shit lads
have you ever:
kissed a stranger: nope
drank hard liquor: drank sparkling water once it counts
lost contacts/glasses: no im so blind they always have to be on my fucking face
sex on first date: sex never .
broken someone’s heart: yeah but when i was kid so it probably didnt mean much
been arrested: iddjsh i was gonna joke but i cant think of anything so no
turned someone down: jhdhhdjs yeah but mostly like hangouts?? hdjhd not like dates and shit
fallen for a friend: let me think the first girl i liked wasnt a friend but when we became friends i was like o womrie nvm but she did help me realize im Not straight as did tumblr which even tho i constantly insult it helped me a lot fjdhjhs but my two crushes after were on my friends ;-/ my first crush unfortunately on a guyddhhs wasnt my friend either tho damn now u guys know my whole backstory :D
do you believe:
in yourself: sometimes bitch has 2 get those grades man
miracles: yes you (love live) please come home........ ... ....
love at first sight: dam. was gonna talk abt anime again but hjhdhshj no ? i guess not maybe like wow ur attractive at first sight but thats it
if u read until the end thank u ur the realest have a good day!!!!!
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Alright alright alriiiiiight
cool beans lets do some late night updates
2:32am
Saturdaay march 28th of 2020
Fucking whores all aaaaaaaaaa
I feel really dizzy
My sleeo schedule is fucked
My dude didnt text mr back so im about to do the mature thing and put their notifications on mute till 10am tomorrow
It changes nothing since i will inevitably wake up at 3pm anyway
Oh well
Im severely dehydrated and exhausted and only stayed up to foolishly see if this man who i am not committed to could talk to me
Since i am a fool
I think he's had the hots for me for awhile even without my looks involved?
it couldve just been lust tho
what about me spitefully tweeting about ex boyfriends makes men so hard
"oh hell yeah I want a girl to obsess over me like she does with them" first of all, ew, second of all, u have nothing to offer, and third, shut up
i wanna do shit like bake desserts for my loved ones and watch studio ghibli movies with them naked, not angrily tweet about how much i hate them and their pretty blue eyes-- i mean, their shitty shit shithead shithole face
God hes a slut and i hate him
Literally nigga what the fuck
sorry i got distracted and had a "why" moment
Anyway
Dj
Bitch
I dont see skuts as a bad thing, its not a nice word, ssmsm
Anyway
Itchbi i newd to sleep
Rowan isnt a slut; i called patrick one abd i sfmdm dje for them.
They're not a slit. Theyre just really terrible, and i dont enjoy knowing theyre existing to this day totally unscathed to the actions theh bave done.
Whatsv
Anyway i feel like fucking hell aaaaaaaaaaaaa gang gang in this bitch
2:45am
Sluts are us
We boutta die yall knfao.
So anyway.
I think Rowan's liked me for awhile.
I really don't like getti g too attached to people, since all that happens is i get clingy due to not having anyone else
And then i get scarily standoffish as a coping mechanism to not wanting to seem too invested in them
And then someone gets scared away.
I would muuuuuch rather not have that happen.
I like Rowan, but like, i don't like when its noticeable that i like a man, you know? Men get too cocky, and they get bored.
Example: any interaction with an immature man under the age of 85, ever, getting tired of something once they can finally have it.
I like him as a friend, but the whole "not able to fuck unless i go overseas or some shit" thing is a hindrance.
I think I mainly sexted him since, 1) he's adorable, and 2) i think it was a day or so after the flop last time i saw my uglyass ex boyfriend, aaaaand i wanted *someone* to see my cute outfit for the day.
Long story short, aye.
Once it goes from "casual flirt buddy to jokingly make blush every once and awhile" to "yeah man thats how the pussy looks", is when the affection and interest goes away?
It could be in my head, but idk.
I just would rather leave first than be the one getting the short wnd of the stick.
Probably just sleeping, then waking up and listening to music would feel nice.
Nothing sad, though. No Ocean Eyes or Kane Strang. Only upbeat music. R&b classics, ayesha erotica, trina.... good stuff, that good ass self confidence music.
Aye.
2:52am. Time to desimp myself again. Peace out.
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ĐỨA CHÁU VÔ THỪA NHẬN TẬP 223 | MẸ KEYKEY ĐÚNG LÀ MỘT CON PHÙ THỦY ▶️ Xem lại full các tập phim "Đứa cháu vô thừa nhận" tại http://bit.ly/2rxYiu2 ▶️ Nhấn theo dõi kênh Youtube http://bit.ly/2rxYiu2 để không bỏ lỡ tập phim mới nhất nào nhé! ▶️ Nhấn vào link để theo dõi kênh: http://bit.ly/2rxYiu2 ▶️Xem phim "ĐỨA CHÁU VÔ THỪA NHẬN" lúc 21h trên #chíbằngvlog #Đứacháuvôthừanhậntập223 chí bằng vlog - Kênh truyền hình tổng hợp các chương trình giải trí trong và ngoài nước, phim truyện Việt Nam, Châu Á và phim điện ảnh Hollywood, Gameshow, chương trình thiếu nhi…; phát sóng liên tục 24 tiếng mỗi ngày. ✦TodayTV có mặt trên các hệ thống : phim, giải trí, thể thao, phong cách số, du lịch………. ✦ Website: http://bit.ly/2rxYiu2 “Đứa cháu vô thừa nhận” được lấy cảm hứng từ “Zakhm”- bộ phim Bollywood nổi tiếng dựa trên cuộc đời của nhà làm phim Mahesh Bhatt được sản xuất năm 1998. Bộ phim truyền hình của hãng Dhaval And Guroudev Productions Pvt. Ltd kể về hành trình tìm lại danh phận của đứa con ngoài giá thú của một vị đạo diễn nổi tiếng. Điều đau đớn là ngay khi được sinh ra, cô bé đã phải đối mặt với những bi kịch cuộc đời mà người gây ra không ai khác chính là bà nội của cô bé - 1 tín đồ Hindu giáo vốn dĩ mang niềm tin hà khắc với chính đứa con dâu của mình - 1 tín đồ Hồi giáo. Cũng vì lẽ đó mà bà chưa bao giờ nhìn nhận cháu gái cũng như đứa con dâu, người đã mang nặng đẻ đau giọt máu của gia đình mình.Là kết quả của mối tình vụng trộm giữa đạo diễn nổi tiếng Ashish Mehta và Ayesha Haider - một người phụ nữ Hồi giáo, Avni Ayesha đã sớm đối mặt với những khổ đau khi chưa bao giờ được Dayawanti Mehta - bà nội của mình nhìn nhận. Yêu vợ, thương con nhưng Ashish Mehta lại không thể chống lại mẹ, một tín đồ Hindu giáo mang đầy mâu thuẫn và quan điểm hà khắc với người Hồi giáo. Vì luôn tin rằng chính người Hồi giáo đã gây ra cái chết năm xưa của chồng nên người đàn bà góa bụa luôn tìm cách chia rẽ tình yêu của con trai. Để cắt đứt mọi quan hệ với gia đình "không chính thống" đó, Dayawanti đã quyết định cho Ashish Mehta kết hôn với Neela - con gái của một vị doanh nhân giàu có.Tình cờ biết được sự thật đằng sau cuộc hôn nhân sắp đặt, Neela đã kết thân với Avni và giúp cô bé tìm lại công bằng. Một bộ phim về cuộc đời Avni cũng được thực hiện kèm theo những thông điệp riêng với hy vọng sẽ giúp ích cho cô bé ở một khía cạnh nào đó, nhưng ngày phim ra mắt cũng là ngày Ayesha - mẹ của Avni, bị tai nạn theo đúng chủ đích của Dayawanti. Và chưa dừng lại ở đó, bà còn ra tay giết hại Ayesha vào đúng cái ngày cô hạ sinh con trai Aman rồi bắt cóc cậu bé và đổi tên thành Amol - người thừa kế của gia đình. Sau những nỗ lực, Avni đã vạch trần tội ác của bà nội, thế nhưng bằng sự gian xảo, Dayawanti đã khiến mọi người tin rằng Avni mới là kẻ giết người và đẩy cô vào tù. Nhờ sự giúp đỡ của Neela, Avni đã thoát khỏi chốn lao tù và họ cùng nhau bỏ trốn, nhưng Dayawanti đã nhanh hơn, bà hẹn gặp Avni và bất ngờ nổ súng kết liễu cuộc đời đứa cháu gái bất hạnh. Thế nhưng, đó chỉ là sự bắt đầu cho cuộc trả thù của Anvi sau khi thoát khỏi lưỡi hái tử thầnCuộc hành trình tìm lại danh phận của Avni rồi sẽ ra sao? Những khúc mắc trong quá khứ và mâu thuẫn tôn giáo trong lòng bà Dayawanti có được hóa giải? Và sau những tổn thương, Avni có tìm được hạnh phúc khi mang thân phận là một đứa con ngoài giá thú? Cô có được đoàn tụ cùng gia đình - nơi mà đúng ra cô sẽ thuộc về? Bộ phim “Đứa cháu vô thừa nhận”, tác phẩm truyền hình ấn tượng về đề tài tôn giáo sẽ lần đầu tiên được ra mắt khán giả Việt Nam trên TodayTV lúc 21h00 thứ 2-7 hàng tuần ĐỨA CHÁU VÔ THỪA NHẬN - TẬP 183 | NEIL BỊ VIRUT CHÔN SỐNG https://youtu.be/900UOPP2IR4 https://youtu.be/GtYNMwISejM https://youtu.be/9kCSFlkA1JM https://youtu.be/2Fpfsdbczx0?t=211 https://youtu.be/o1u-ZzXnJuQ https://youtu.be/c8owwu5vg9A https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x-RTjRW8glY Music provided by http://spoti.fi/NCS
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Ayesha Liveblogs Oh My Ghost (2018) Ep. 1-8
As a precursor to the mildly harrowing journey I’m about to take you on, you should know that I initially liveblogged this in a Discord chat, so what I liveblogged is purposely not emphasizing some of the stranger elements of this show. Anyway, I thought, well why not have this fever dream live on my blog too. Spoilers ahead, but as I’ve said: it’s not that I recommend this show, but I did watch the whole thing
This woman is chanting at a rooftop altar in a lightning storm so I'm guessing she's responsible for the horny ghost
Just as I was pondering the fact that this is the only piece of Thai media I have consumed in which the main characters are not, to my knowledge, mlm or wlw, the next three characters to appear on screen were all gay (I do think they're just bit roles and not important characters but it was funny timing)
Update: God this is the second show premised upon Magical Virginity set in Asia I've seen in the past few months; r u ok Thailand and Japan
In an ironic twist of fate, she can't go to the afterlife unless she has sex with someone.... as a ghost????
I don't care for most of the chefs in this kitchen; both the sous-chef and executive chef seem to physically intimidate staff below them
In more fun news Jiw, the shy main character, seems to see all sorts of dead people, since she is currently being haunted by spectres other than Horny Ghost, who has not yet met her
Grandma's explanation for why Jiw sees ghosts is that it's hereditary
UNBELIEVABLE SOMEONE HAS REFERRED TO HER AS A HORNY GHOST ON SCREEN
I'm oddly endeared by this sudden auto-rickshaw-chasing-a-taxi shenanigan, makes me miss India a little
“The onIy thing I can’t let go now is just that” It appears that the fact her virginity is relevant not because it's part of some greater Thai ghost lore, but because she specifically really wants to have sex but died before she could. The Horny Ghost Title prevails
It has been implied that Sun the Executive Chef may somehow be one of the 1-in-ten-million-men who could withstand having sex with a ghost, I now understand the trajectory of this show
“If one day you happen to possess someone who has exactly the same frequency as you, you will never be able to leave that body” The heavy-handed exposition is great
Reasons I Do Not Trust Sun the Executive Chef:
1) He seems p harsh with his staff
2) He was rude to his mum
3) He doesn't like rice!!!! Who do u think u are!!! Gluten-intolerant???
Oh my goooood, I think Win the Handsome Restaurant Staff Who Studied Abroad (who I have been rooting for since he was introduced purely because he's handsome) might be Jiw's love interest hkjhgkjhgkhg
It might be a love square!!! Jiw and Win falling for each other while Horny Ghost tries to get with Sun the Executive Chef
“You know why I don’t like you?” SUN YOU ARE HER EMPLOYER!!!
He's right but he's rude 😔:
“A woman shouldn’t have scars on her hands” The context of this comment is that Jiw has just spilled hot soup on her hands kjhfkhfjhf sorry Sun, femininity isn't flame-retardant
Sun's tragic backstory is that he was also once a crybaby who apologized too much
Though in fairness to Jiw, if I were seeing ghosts and had this kind of work culture, I'd be stressed out too
Jury's still out on Sun; I do like Sun's sister and her husband, they both seem very nice so far
I'm confused by the fact that Jiw's landlord seems to barge into her place anytime he wants??? Also he's threatening her to evict her for her Ghost-Be-Gone-Rituals
The first actual hint of romance: Sun is commenting on Jiw's food blog, which he doesn't know belongs to her, bc he thinks her recipe and passion for cooking is nice
KUHHGDKJHGKJDHGKJHSJDKHG Horny Ghost has now possessed Jiw and has just THROWN SUN TO THE GROUND for trying to root through her purse for the storage room key
My guess is that the Horny Ghost will try to get with Sun the Executive Chef, while inhabiting Jiw’s body Greed-from-FMAB-style
Ep 2: Horny Ghost is attempting to figure out what Jiw's job is in this restaurant while still impersonating/possessing her
Barely ten minutes in and she has already challenged the sous-chef to a fight
Horny Ghost’s only priorities are fucking and fighting
God it's so hard get through this show it's too embarrassing
POOR JIWWWWWW SHE DOES NOT DESERVE TO HAVE THIS PERSON IN CHARGE OF HER BODY JGHKJHG
Jiw has been saved from further embarrassment because Sun has been taken into the police station. Bc he firmly escorted a food blogger out of his restaurant in ep 1 for yelling at his staff and now she's filing false charges against him. Whack
Why is there a shower in the back of this restaurant??? I was willing to accept the lockers for their stuff but the shower perplexes me. Was this building formerly a gym??
And yeah I don't know if I'll make it through this whole show bc I have to pause every minute or two to be embarrassed
TOOK 1 MINUTE FOR JIW TO SHOW UP IN THE SHOWER
I feel all of these emotions
Horny Ghost!Jiw is taking Handsome Study-Abroad Win on a date; I feel bad for both Jiw and Win bc I think they have a vibe going on hgkjhgjh
Executive Chef Sun is solving his B Plot problems by leaving fake positive reviews about his own restaurant
Sun is mad at his mom for settling his legal dispute bc she wasn't there when he was a Sad Little Rich Boy (Now he is simply a Mad Tall Rich Man)
I keep forgetting that the Sous Chef's name is Rain; hgkjhgkjhg I wonder if Sun hired him for the comedy of it
Oh with added context Sun and his mom had a rough go of it actually, she had him young and sent his sister to live with their aunt and kind of really did leave Sun to fend for himself
SUN MADE A FRIEND
Sun's mom and Horny Ghost's Nemesis (Auntie Pu) are hanging out bc Sun's mom is very superstitious
Also dear god these episodes are each an hour long???
An earlier sidenote: There was a scene where Auntie Pu seemed to be heckled by God for her inability to catch Horny Ghost
Executive Chef Sun is now shooting a cooking competition and Rain has been thrown out by security so I'm guessing that Sun and Horny Ghost will be ✨ live ✨ on ✨ television ✨
So the theme of the cooking competition is Mom's Home Cooking and they've mentioned like 3 times that Sun's mom never cooked anything for him
I know this is supposed to be a sad moment for Sun but I'm cracking up bc he reacted like he'd just been shot kghkjgh
Horny Ghost is helppppppppppppppppping!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Oh noooooooo the sad old man restaurant owner having a hard time with his business who they occasionally cut to is Horny Ghost's dad, it seems!!
You know, ironically even though the other Thai media I've watched has been set mostly coming of age/university stories, this is the first thing aside from Love of Siam that has put such emphasis on the parents. Most other media has been ‘1-2 parent scenes in the whole thing is enough’
HORNY GHOST HAS REGAINED SOME OF HER MEMORIES AND NOW HAS A NAME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HER DAD CALLS HER 'KAOPOON'
Awww Dad's Restaurant used to be so bustling with life when Kaopoon was still alive 💔
Kaopoon's obnoxious personality really suited her old life!!
What an unexpected turn towards sincerity and emotional depth
In more light-hearted news, Sun is still vain as hell
Also shout-out to Thailand for the adult orthodontics representation kjhkgjh I noticed this in 2gether as well, it seems a p common thing
Kaopoon has made the bold choice of hanging out of with her dad and snooping through her old room. I can only imagine this will lead to a fight with her brother, bc she has Jiw's face
OH MY GOD KAOPOON HAS BEEN STEALING FROM SUN'S RESTAURANT TO GIVE STUFF TO HER DAD'S RESTAURANT KJHFKHGK
Another ongoing subplot mildly stressing me out: Sun's sister Nam is married to a policeman and it turns out that Kaopoon used to have a crush on him when she was alive and I'm like DON'T FLIRT WITH HIM IN JIW'S BODY PLEASE DON'T NAM IS HER FRIEND
Sous Chef Rain is being a real bro to Horny Ghost Kaopoon and saying “We should all be held responsible so we don't lose our trust in each other” to which Executive Chef Sun says “that makes you a thief,” bc being rich makes u lose empathy I guess lmao
🎶 This is I why do not trust the Bourgeoisie 🎶
Executive Chef Sun is now expressing his regret for firing his Sous Chef to his dog, who, while doing nothing but eat, has stolen the scene and any of my sympathy
Whoops Horny Ghost's brother is about to reveal her Restaurant Crimes to her boss, I'm pretty sure
I hate that Horny Ghost's brother keeps insinuating that Horny Ghost/Jiw is seeking a “sugar d*ddy” or flirting like can't people just be nice jghjkg? I hope that Sun realizes now that family or not, she was being kind, not stealing for self-gain
This is so fucking funny Sun found out about Jiw/Horny Ghost's restaurant crimes, seemingly forgave her on the spot for no good reason, and hired Sous Chef Rain back only for the rest of the restaurant staff to immediately begin muttering about how much they hated Rain hahaha
I'm beginning to think Sous Chef Rain has a weird passive-aggressive crush on Executive Chef Sun. I would support it only bc I find them both exhausting and the comedy of two people named Sun and Rain falling in love is great
Rain: We have a strong bond. Stronger than friends, family or brothers. Sun, and also me: 👀🤔
“I helped you fix things with Rain,” said Horny Ghost Kaopoon, as if she had not also been one of several sources of conflict at her restaurant. (Also this dialogue is part of her drunkenly coming onto Sun.. which is quite something to watch)
Study-Aboard Win Who Probably Has Feelings for Real Jiw to the rescue
God, who has the mental strength to get through show all at once? Really and genuinely every time this show gives me a false sense of normalcy they do something embarrassing dhfjhfjk where is the pay-off? Where is the romance??
Sun's childhood friend Ida who seems to have a crush on him tried to invite him up to her apartment [Tiktok voice "I wanna ruin our friendship"] but he said nah so now he's standing in the rain thinking about their history
First of all, sir, you are 30, so I don’t see the point of trying to pretend the same actor makes sense in a school uniform. Second of all, is wearing glasses and having bangs all that it takes to make you unpopular? What kinda She's All That nonsense??
Sun's argument for denying the booty call is that they should've dated in university but now they've missed their moment
Horny Ghost has just found out her Cop Crush is married (to Sun's sister) and Sun has just rejected himself from the Friendship Booty Call, so I wonder if they're going to have Sad Sex in the Rain
Update: No one is having sex in the rain but Horny Ghost Kaopoon has just been kicked out of her apartment and is now going to sleep in the restaurant I guess, this should end well
Sun definitely has a weird crush on Horny Ghost bc he keeps letting her get away with all kinds of shit kjhgkhgkgh she has punched him, stole from him, come onto him strongly, and snuck into the restaurant at night and she's just like “~~please chef 🥺” and he's like “FINE 😤😊 you can do whatever I guess”
That said despite taking it fine he did not let her stay the night at the restaurant so I guess that's the one thing she's not allowed to do jghkhgg
Uhhhhhh it seems like the Cop Crush is reciprocated???????? Kaopoon/Jiw was like “You must love her a lot” and he was like “who” ABOUT HIS WIFE!!!
Sun has gotten caught up with Jealousy Antics towards Childhood Friend Ida and now Kaopoon is attempting to blackmail him to let her stay at the restaurant lmaooo
Okay Win his definitely in love with ONE of the two (Sun or Jiw/Kaopoon) bc Jiw/Kaopoon slept in the restaurant and everyone's like “Oooooh Chef and Jiw got lucky last night” and they had a lingering shot of Win looking longingly in their direction
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH Sun just kissed Jiw/Kaopoon bc of a fever-induced hallucination I bet u $85 that Ida is about to walk in
Kaopoon has confirmed that Sun is Ghost-fucking Proof and now she's 100% Mission Sleep with My Possessee's Boss Before I Get Turned Into an Evil Spirit in Two Months
She just straight up asked him, “Will you do it with me? Just once?”
Sun, emotionally, at this particular moment: [Donkey Kong meme]
(As an aside I really wish Kaopoon were not up in everyone's grill romantic advance-wise this is straight up worse than an anime in that sense)
Oh my god is this how they actually become friends?????? By her chasing him around asking him to fuck and him going “NO” and then physically rolling her away from him
I DON'T UNDERSTAND YOUR DYNAMIC!!!!!!!! WHY IS THIS WEIRD FUCK-PROPOSITION MONTAGE SET TO SUCH PEPPY MUSIC
I have now pivoted and I think Cop Crush may have murdered Kaopoon???????? Auntie Pu (Horny Ghost Kaopoon's Nemesis) just said his identity was death and suspicious music played
OH MY GOD FOR SOME REASON SUN UNPLUGGING HIS PHONE CHARGER HAD THE COSMIC EFFECT OF REMOVING HORNY GHOST FROM JIW'S BODY???? WHAT!! WHAT!!!!!!!!
Every time I think "that's it, I'm done with this" they keep pulling me back in!!!
DGhfjdkjk?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! They just made Cop Crush run over an unhoused man's recycling??? I guess to establish that we shouldn't trust him??? What is the writing on this show!!
Dkjhgsdkjhgkjh a Canadian character has appeared for some wonderfully stilted English dialogue:
Sun: How's Canada sir?
Canadian Ambassador: Canada was very cold, but it's good to be back
Sun: It sounds like fun anyway!
CA: It is! It's always fun!
Sun: Ok!
JIW HAS ACCIDENTALLY SET FIRE TO THE BACK OF THE RESTAURANT AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
I figure if I power through the show the psychic damage will be shorter term
Also I think Sun has accosted Real Jiw for a psychiatric evaluation bc of her reasonably erratic behaviour
To add to the layers of this show, Jiw and Sun are back to interacting via her recipe blog and he's all like “wow this internet gal is my soulmate 😍“ like the dumbass he is
Not to detract from internet relationships or anything, but they've exchanged ONE comment
They're having at least a minute long back and forth of cutting to these two staring stupidly into the distance thinking about each other
Kaopoon's father seems to have alcohol poisoning and Cop Crush just left him in the back storage closet on the ground????????????? Heavy-handed murder foreshadowing I think
Kaopoon saved her dad by possessing Jiw again; as much as I understand why she did it I really do feel bad for Jiw bc Kaopoon keeps living her life for her, you know? Seems unkind
Sun just offered to train Jiw/Kaopoon to be a chef (which Jiw really would want to do) but will Jiw be present for it? Hard to say!
SURE YOU WERE LIEUTENANT MURDER
It's been narratively established that Jiw does not remember what happens while she's been possessed so it makes the possessions that much sadder. Particularly since everyone but Win seems to like Kaopoon better
Bc this show needs at least four dramatic plots per episode, Sun has invited his childhood bullies to his restaurant to mock them passive-aggressively with his wealth
The bullies are like: Hey Sun, your childhood trauma's really harshing the vibe
Sun found out his Main Bully (Big) is really not doing well income-wise and now he feels slightly bad for mocking him with his wealth
Clearly Sun has not caught onto the Horny Ghost Situation
Oh my GOD “I spring up every time you talk horny because I’m scared of your words” Sun really said: ‘Well mark me down as a scared AND horny’
Auntie Pu whacked Horny Ghost out of Jiw on the way to their Spring Roll Not-Date so Jiw will finally get to experience some chef stuff with Sun
Sun, despite his reservations, seems to have a crush on all of Jiw's various personalities
He's playing guitar for Jiw through their shared apartment wall just bc she stopped on the street bc she saw a guitar player 🥺❤️
Real Jiw really likes him!! This is the Thai Jamie Oliver bullshit I signed up for
SCREAM he's trying to take Real Jiw on a bike ride kjhgkjhgkh what a quit pivot from his standoffishness to “I will be involved in every aspect of your life”
This biking day concluded in a way I could not have possibly predicted which was, as an interruption to their flirting, they had to high-speed foot chase a bicycle part thief, which they caught because Real Jiw BIT HIM on the leg
And Sun, because he is OUT OF HIS MIND, is just kinda like: “Love that for you babe 🥰”
OKAY SUN YOU MAY HAVE ONE (1) BOURGEOSIE PASS
The Jiw/Sun/Ida stuff finally comes to a head because Ida brought him a cake but Jiw and Sun are already sharing a cake (and restaurant-apartment building)
“Think of it as... helping a hungry policeman” EVERYTHING THIS MAN DOES IS SO FREAKING SUSPICIOUS
Somehow I don't think this is a reasonable request, Kaopoon
Things have escalated and now Auntie Pu, Kaopoon and Jiw are all on Team Sun Should Have Sex with Horny Ghost
I'm gonna power through as much of this show as I can at once so on it goes lol
I kind of understand Sun's "I'm not going to deal with this" way of approaching romance but man it sucks to be Ida who has tried to be pretty forthright with her feelings
So apparently Sun's sister Nam has not always had a wheelchair, she only had it starting three years ago, which is when Kaopoon died,,,,, did Cop Crush murder Kaopoon AND injure his wife,,,,, the stank vibes!!!
As weird as it is that Kaopoon and Jiw are working together to seduce Sun, it's exactly what I wanted and thought this show would be from the beginning
Win said all women are queens 😌❤️
Rain: Why are you protecting [Jiw as Kaopoon]? Is she your girlfriend or something?
Win: Do I need to be her boyfriend to do that? Fine, I'll be her boyfriend then
Sun purposely did not give Win the prize in their Friendly Vacation Cooking Competition because he is jealous that Jiw and Win seem to be flirting; this man said my love language is Passive Aggression
They're going on yet another couple's bike ride (this time ft. Horny Ghost Jiw, which Sun simply canonically thinks is a product of mania, which is fair I guess)
Nam's friends are talking about the person who did a hit and run to Nam getting karmic justice while Lieutenant Murder sits there, probably the one that did it
Lieutenant Murder (formerly known as Cop Crush) just keyed his wife's friend's car because they need to establish that he is not only evil, but also a run-of-the-mill dick
Gsdkdhgkhgkh Kaopoon as Jiw has been trapped inside a storage crate by a tween girl who can see ghosts and u can this is set in Thailand (or Asia generally) bc they cut to this temp gauge like 10C is a really threatening temp. Girl it's chilly but you are fine!!
Sun said, "I am in love with all sides of Jiw, Aggressive Horny Ghost I Think Is Mania included"
#ayesha says things#ayesha liveblogs oh my ghost#liveblogging#oh my ghost 2018#thai television#television#long post
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Ayesha Liveblogs Cardcaptor Sakura: Clear Card S1
Not to be someone born in the 90s but wow this is a change from the more simple animation style new anime truly likes things shiny, intensely bright and round lmao
Ah I guess the prologue is just a reanimation of the original anime finale? That’s fair it helps you reintegrate if it had been nineteen years for you
“That way, you’ll realize who you consider to be your Number One” Eriol’s advice has gotten less cryptic since he stopped lying
“The person I love the most... is you” Lmao didn’t Syaoran ALREADY do this confession in the final battle this is like in Naruto the Last where Naruto just forgot that Hinata had already said she loved him
Fdshkfjhkjdfhksjhfkjh wow Yukito appearing with a flower background and shine effect and softened face is this a style choice or is this just Toya Vision™
I think Toya’s voice IS different rest in pieces I still respect u bro
“How do I feel about Syaoran” [Pan across Syaoran in floral background] It is a style choice how very shojo manga of you
I’m really very confused by the references to Tokyo Tower bc I’m pretty sure they were battling at Tsukimine Shrine did I miss something??
No I just checked it was definitely at the shrine in the anime did THEY not check or were they like ‘hmmm not enough drama only Tokyo Tower for our battle backdrops pls’
This is the third or fourth flower backdrop in the first ten minutes jkhkdjhg the floral effect artists said ‘I WILL BE SILENT NO LONGER’:
I DO NOT understand the chronology of this the bear exchange was the last scene in the anime is this before or after the finale???? If it’s after then why is Syaoran still in town
Rjhkjhgkj is the entire point of redoing this episode so Sakura could also give Syaoran a bear
“Toya was too embarrassed, so he had me bring it over and went back to his room” Lmao @ Toya sending his boyfriend to be nice to his sister in his place
If this show does not stop the floral cutaways I will not be able to take it seriously it is Ouran High School Host Club levels of intensity jdshfkjshdfkjhsdk
“Will you wait for me?” “Yes! I’ll wait! I’ll be waiting!” I think they threw out all continuity just so they could establish that these feelings were for sure mutual for the setup of the sequel series
That, or the original series so heavily discarded manga continuity that they are trying to walk it back to something more accurate without any real explanation
Rffkghkfghkdfhgkj if they’re referencing the original anime bear scene what was the point of that stupid prologue SO WHAT IS THE TRUTH
“My name is Mike. I’m from Portland” LOL references to Americans in anime are always so funny
“Now I can stay in Tomoeda forever” did u bring ur mom and sisters orrr
Gosh I’m actually quite thrown by how quickly this romance escalated it took them 57 episodes to just use each other’s first names and now it’s taken them one (1) episode to Commit 4Ever At Age 13
HAHAHA do they have smart phones now? Always on the cutting edge
“I Am a Stuffed Animal” some of the quirky captions ARE worth it
“Make sure you tell him... even the smallest things” Yue has become more of a romantic since he got closure and a part-time boyfriend
“I never knew! Thanks for telling me!” “Never change, Li-kun” kjhgkjhdkj STILL MY GULLIBLE BOY some things don’t ever change
Is that a dragon?? They are really expanding this magical universe
It bears repeating the polar opposite levels of pacing from the two shows it’s only episode one and they’ve already established so many new rules and powers
I don’t blame them for it though bc they have to put forward some kind of plot progression
There were so many visual effects in that scene I couldn’t even tell what was happening lmao it’s like reading manga battles
“But why are these things happening in Tomoeda again?” I mean not to point fingers but Syaoran’s arrival is fairly recent
“Did Wei-san come back with you” “No, just me. But he said he’d come to check on me in a while” HE’S 13?? CHILD. WELFARE. LAWS!!!!
“I wish that I could’ve used it as a reference” “For what?” “To make something that would look wonderful on you” LMAO now that Syaoran and Sakura are a thing He is Included in the outfits
“’Great to have you’ so you can do what?” don’t bully ur sister Toya, u r both happy with your respective relationships now
WHAT ARE THE STAKES OF KERO PRETENDING TO BE A PLUSHIE TOYA IS LITERALLY DATING THE MOON
I understood “Gale” but what exactly is a “Siege” card this feels a little abstract
“We managed to keep him in the dark” did u tho? Again. Moon boyfriend
“So it happened in her room” Did u put a protection spell on that bear or something Syaoran
I genuinely do not tire of Syaoran and Sakura’s shared gullibility this couple is morosexual solidarity
How convenient that Sakura’s new key just announces whenever there’s a new clear card to collect lmao
I meant what I said about Toya’s love language being touching Yukito somewhere above the shoulders
“You’ll find out when the time comes” Dfddjhfjkdhf Toya what are you going to DO
Two cards in one episode is quite a bit for ep 3 I guess they’re trying to give her some more fighting options lol
Is the implication of the way Sakura just happens to be coming across magical phenomenon that Clow Reed didn’t make his cards but just harnessed magic that existed in nature
For no reason other than my own suspicion I think that something funky is going on with Syaoran’s powers
“That person was almost the same height as me” I mean so was Eriol
“Sakura and the Lovely Transfer Student” we know by now transfer students mean that shit’s about to get real
“And then you slept with your belly uncovered” “I did not!” Toya’s gentle bullying to distract Sakura is always weirdly sweet
“Your brother is so funny Sakura” CHIHARU’S RIGHT STAN TOYA
SHINOMOTO ARE YOU SHITTING ME JHDFGHDGDFDD WHY DOES IT RHYME
“I hope we can be friends” if I know anything about this show this means she’s going to do something very shady immediately
I wonder if this will be the season that Tomoyo’s filming of everything Sakura does finally becomes plot relevant
I do think it’s weird that Sakura trusted a new key without questioning it
“I’m changing back” LOL @ YUE TRANSFORMING INTO YUKITO JUST TO AVOID PEOPLE I’M STARTING TO REALLY LIKE HIM
DGSJGSJDGDJGSFFSJDHJS YUKITO APOLOGIZING FOR YUE LEAVING RUDELY THAT’S MY POLITE AND HANDSOME MAN WHO HAS NEVER DONE ANYTHING WRONG IN HIS LIFE
I KNEW Syaoran was being suspicious!!! Talking about Sakura with Eriol in secret phone calls
“I came here to be ready for that time, when it comes” current theory is that Syaoran has NO powers and that’s why he is not running out of his classroom for teenage battles with the Forces of Nature
“How much has Yukito-san been eating?” “Not as much as he did when you were in elementary school, but he still eats a lot for his size” This must be a strange conversation for their dad to listen to but I like how this is code for Does Yukito Have Magical Chakra Exhaustion
“Um, I just... Phone call” said Sakura, as she was forcibly moonwalked away right in front of her friends’ eyes
LOL is Tomoyo being unable to film Sakura going to be a recurring joke
“Don’t worry about it” “I have to, when it’s about you” Syaoran really going Full Boyfriend Mode huh
I’ve never questioned it in until precisely this moment but who pays Kero’s phone bill?? Is it Tomoyo? Who is the account holder for this stuffed animal did she establish Kero as a legal person
“Momo-chan, let’s be friends okay?” I feel like this has to be immediate foreshadowing for Momo being alive
[Cucumber cut incorrectly] “Gotta show Yuki” hjkfhksjdhfkjhd rude of Toya but the caption kills me
Ddjkhfkjdhfjkdhfkjh the pure juxtaposition of this energy:
Tomoyo: They have other things to do
Chiharu, thinking that it’s a romance thing: [Winks]
Syaoran and Sakura: [In the shadows while threatening music plays]
“I didn’t feel... anything” oh NO why r their magic senses NOT tingling
I feel like I have been had, they had an episode called the “Song of the Moon” and Yukito didn’t even show up?? Rude
SCREAM this magical FaceTime call is much funnier than I could’ve imagined
“Yukito is in a recitation club, which he takes very seriously” GDGJFGJGJHGDG Yue very respectful of not occupying Yukito’s time with magical shenanigans LMAO
“And we’ll make them the cutest oxygen masks you’ve ever seen” Tomoyo, like the background effects artists in this anime, will not be stopped
Well colour me inaccurate I guess Syaoran can use his powers and he can do a fancy new sword thing
I like this flying scarf it’s the first of the new cards with a personality
Poor Syaoran always so serious to being a Teenage Wizard is hard
Wow I bet there’s NOTHING weird about the fact Akiho lives in Eriol’s house it’s just pure happenstance (said no one)
“Could we um, go out together?” I think this is the first time someone has explicitly scheduled a date in all 80+ episodes
I really do enjoy Toya’s never-ending list of temp jobs lmao
“Still going on, huh?” Toya’s older brother senses are unparalleled
LMAO IS THIS A 15 YEAR OLD BUTLER
Ghgjhfjfjhfjh what is the scale for these heights why is Kaito twice the height of these 13-year-olds
Unsubtle shot of this man’s pocket watch echoing Sakura’s dream
I’ve never seen a more Rich Person Reaction than Akiho getting upset that Katio, a service worker, stated that taking care of her was his job hfkjdhfkjh
“I came to Japan because there was a book I wanted”
1. VERY Rich Person thing to say
2. Wow I wonder which of you has a MAGICAL BOOK that’s been doing weird things lately
“What language is it” “I don’t know, but I’ve learned to read it” me when I hear people speak South Asian languages LMAO
Why does everyone keep referencing the Time That’s Coming? Toya, Syaoran, Eriol... they’ve all caught Mizuki’s affliction of vague and unhelpful prophecies
*One more go to jail Mizuki for the road
I hope that these stupid FaceTime calls with Yue are in EVERY episode from now on
Does the fact that he’s listed as Yue-san in Sakura’s phone mean that there’s a phone for each personality omg
OMG I just realized the ep title (Sakura’s Thrilling Aquarium Visit) must be a throwback to “Sakura’s Heart-Racing First Date” which was not a date but took place at an aquarium. Cute!!
GJHGSHJGFSGH Yue is me whenever people talk about video games:
Kero: Hey, Yue, play an online game with me
Yue: [Hangs up immediately]
“I made you wait” “Nah, I got here too early. It’s still twelve minutes before our meeting time.” I think she and Yukito had this exact exchange in that early ep
“She doesn’t have magical powers, but she’s oddly perceptive” I hope that Meilin’s one and only magical power is precognition lmao
Omg every time someone in this show speaks English I am so thrown
“I wasn’t sure how I should look at him” awww Syaoran trying to re-establish himself in the family
I guess this aquarium HAS changed in that it developed a security system for when the tank breaks [youknowwhathatisgrowth.gif]
LOL I guess it’s convenient to have an invisibility cloak when ur breaking and entering I was wondering how they were going to deal with their criminal behaviour in the age of cameras
Ep 10. Sakura’s Unbelievable Juvenile Detention Centre
Weel weel weel looks like Sakura isn’t the only one with new powers nice ice Syaoran!! I missed their tag team fights
OH MY GOD IF THIS PHOTO ALBUM ACCEPTS THE CONTINUITY OF THE SECOND MOVIE THEN SAKURA AND SYAORAN HAVE ALREADY! DONE! THEIR! CONFESSIONS! WOULD YOU PICK A LANE
“You want the person you like to eat good food” Besides the fact Kaito is twice your height and therefore probably an adult... u should not make advances on people u employ - this is all very bad-vibes-no-jutsu
I am shocked that it took this long for Sakura to notice that her new cards paralleled the old cards
Syaoran is staring at Kaito like he murdered his spouse in a previous life
“So he has Moon magic too?” UHHHH WAS SYAORAN’S MAGIC ALWAYS MOON-BASED I FEEL LIKE THAT’S NOT CLEAR
Also very unclear why Eriol keeps leaving her on read if he’s talking to Syaoran what
I love how Kero has independent friendships and communications with both Yukito and Tomoyo lmao
How many times has Penguin Park been destroyed by now
“Perhaps your dream is gradually progressing” Progressing into what exactly the Battle of the Nice Thirteen-Year-Olds
Why is it that magic in this universe comes with above-average athletic ability LOL
Once again, without a body/personification, these cards seem harsh
Kaito seems like too much of a red herring a la Mizuki so I’m going to assume the other presence we see is someone we either haven’t met yet or smth really fucked up with the rest of the main cast
I’d lose my mind if it was Toya but I genuinely hope not he’s too nice
I honestly missed Meilin ever since she chilled out a bit she’s very fun
“The emoji in her message definitely looked thrilled” [Bob Dylan voice] For the times they are a-changin’.....
“I don’t know when it’ll happen, but when it does you’ll know” Toya.......
Toya’s absolutely nonplussed reaction to his Moon Boyfriend never ceases to amaze
Yukito: [Sighs and floats into the air to wrap in a wing cocoon]
Toya: [Sitting and staring unfazed]
Also am I crazy or was that transformation on purpose bc it really had the energy of ‘Fine if you won’t talk to me maybe you’ll talk to Rude Magical Me!!’
“Did I change again?” GUESS NOT LMAO
Also it’s fun how as different as Yukito and Yue are, their shared brain cell says ‘TOYA COMMUNICATE WITH MEE’
“But ever since Syaoran came back, he’s had something important on his mind” People don’t give Sakura enough credit for her emotional intelligence
Can we take a minute to appreciate Sakura’s outfit fashion ICON
What is this Furry card that makes u dress up in ears and a tail lmao
“I’ll treasure [these cookies]” “I’d rather you ate them” LOL
My Furry card prediction gets more and more accurate with each passing second (even a broken clock’s right twice a day)
Uhhhhh Syaoran what did u sell to the moon devil to be able to cut through the space-time continuum
Sakura: NO THAT’S MY EMOTIONAL SUPPORT SYAORAN
SCREAM this family and their circle of hair cutting (also if Yukito cuts Toya’s hair, does Toya cut Yukito’s? Or does it not grow bc magic jfhkfh)
“I’m pretty sure that was middle school English” Sakura hearing English is me hearing French LMAO
“Sucks, doesn’t he?” MEILIN PLS
Djhfjkdhkjfhjk Tomoyo’s immediate rage at being the centre of attention
SAKURA DOING MAGIC RIGHT IN FRONT OF OTHER PEOPLE OMG
“Surround the entire mansion” Very subtle Sakura I’m sure no one in your whole town will notice
“I hear her father specializes in archaeology, so he might have some interesting books” “Have I mentioned Sakura-san’s father to you before?” [Dramatic cut in music] WELL
Oh my GOD did Kaito just turn back time bc he regretted what he said immediately? Honestly a mood
Also: BITCH
“You’re so alike, and not just because of your names” I have to say I’ve been thinking since her first appearance that Akiho looks like Nadeshiko so if they’re not related I will be surprised
“Sometimes watching good people makes me feel sad” well damn Meilin
I’m going to guess this Teenage Robot is the equivalent of the fight card that Meilin fought upon her introduction
Aw HELL YEAH SAKURA AND MEILIN TAG TEAM FIGHT WOOOO
“Aren’t you and Syaoran doing too much for those you care about, and forgetting to care about yourselves?” WELL DAMN MEILIN U R THE NEW TEENAGE SUPERHERO THERAPIST
“Can I call you ‘Sakura’ from now on, too?” AHHH THESE KIDS
LMAO AMAZING IT TOOK 13 STRAIGHT EPISODES FOR MOMO TO EVEN TWITCH
“We are indeed progressing... toward that time” I feel THREATENED
Once again I cannot stress strongly enough how much I love physical comedy
Sakura: They don’t seem to be causing any harm
The dessert rolls:
GOD the roll cakes eating each other to form one giant monster Babushka doll roll cake jhfjkdhgkdjhgkj incredible
EXCUSE ME MA’AM WHY WAS THERE A DEMON GIRL IN THE REFLECTION OF THIS SHATTERED CARD
“Please laugh again” Akiho is v nice I really hope Kaito isn’t mean
“Once a magical contract is formed, it can’t be broken, unless something really serious happens” [Quirrel voice] Can anyone tell me what foreshadowing is?
“What do you feel” “I think it’s a card” Very observant Sakura I think they gathered that
When Sakura gets all four of the base elements is Momo going to turn into a 200 pound giant rabbit
I like that every time Toya is concerned about Sakura, Yue appears suddenly to discuss the matter seriously with him [Gay and Wondorous Life of Caleb Gallo voice] He’s in this relationship!!
“When you’re angry or upset, it shows on your face, even if you don’t say it” Yue IS in this relationship woooow
“When humans realize they’re talking to a fox, they won’t sell you mittens. In fact, they’ll catch you and put you in a cage.” UH who is the fox in this metaphor not Sakura I hope???
Years later Syaoran is still winded if Sakura makes too much eye contact khgkghkjg
The fact that Yukito reads at a children’s hospital... truly one of The Nicest Not-Humans On Earth
Well with each passing episode we have less and less reasons to trust these cards and Kaito the Young Magical Butler
Ever since Kaito reversed time, I cannot shake the persistent thought that Akiho IS Nadeshiko. That’d be weird but u know... I’ve seen this show do weirder
“Your sweets look better” “No, yours!” Grandpa witnessing this date
“Also if Sakura-chan goes to college or wants to do something else, he wants to help” TOYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
“Any further, and you won’t be able to return” NADESHIKO BE MORE SPECIFIC
“It was my robe” Wait what ur family is a magical society or smth and somehow u don’t know Akiho??? How in the whomst
Everyone in this anime is like, ‘Haha Yue looks mad’ as if Yue does not look mad every second that he’s alive
KHKJHKFJHKJFHJ GRANDPA MASAKI REALLY GONNA GIVE SAKURA A HOUSE AND TOYA NOTHING LMAO WHAT’S IT LIKE TO BE THE LEAST FAVOURITE GREAT-GRANDCHILD LOL
“Nadeshiko would talk to things that weren’t there, and try to reach an understanding with things that couldn’t talk” 91 EPISODES LATER AND MR. KINOMOTO FINALLY ACKNOWLEDGES MAGIC?? OKAY
AND HE KNEW BOTH SAKURA AND TOYA HAVE HAD MAGICAL PROBLEMS FOR 3 YEARS!!! MR. KINOMOTO WHAT KIND OF HANDS-OFF PARENTING
“I want me to tell me [about your pain] too” wow this is the CALL-OUT EPISODE
“The house they live in was once torn down and replaced with an amusement park” were the continuity errors of accepting the second movie... A PLOT POINT?!?!?!
DAMN U KAITO I REALLY WANTED THINGS TO BE OKAY FOR AKIHO
“But I’ve got a great poker face” “Yes you do. But Yue does not” JKHDKJGHKJSHGKJHDKJGHSDJGHKJH BY DIALOGUE ALONE IT’S LIKE WHENEVER ANYONE SEES YUE’S FACE TWITCH IT MEANS HE’S HAVING AN EMOTIONAL BREAKDOWN
Yue: Evil magic looming overhead is bad for your wifi signal actually
“I will obtain these new cards. So I can use the relic I took from the association to activate that magic spell” Kaito really laying out his motivations out loud in a library. Insensible. Vague and probably misleading. 1/10 villainous monologue
Sakura’s powers are WILD she can duplicate the strength of her magic
“Power that’s too strong will bring unhappiness to its owner” SYAORAN :((
I feel like the only way this can end is Toya giving Sakura magical noogie so she doesn’t have to carry all of her powers like the reverse of what he did for Yue-kito
THERE IS TOO LITTLE TIME LEFT IN THIS SHOW FOR ALL THE ANSWERS I NEED THERE’S ONLY 20 MINUTES AHHHH
THERE ARE 12 MINUTES LEFT AND STILL NO ANSWERS!!! WHAT HAPPENSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I GOT ABSOLUTELY NO ANSWERS OH MY GOD?!?!?!?!
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Ayesha Liveblogs Tiger King
“I think it would be fair to say that Carole is the Mother Teresa of cats” now there’s a sentence I never thought I’d hear
“I’d never been a person who had friends” statements like this always perplex me because surely there had to be ONE other person in however long you quantify childhood that you identified with. Like not one whole ass person? You’re not the only person who loves cats Carole
The juxtaposition between Carole Baskin’s “Animal Print for Animal Rights” and Joe Exotic’s “Tiger King underwear is our bestseller” is poetic cinema
Okay this isn’t a reflection of my opinions on this man but I Saw a Tiger is a good country ballad there I said it
“When I first met Joe, I was like a month out of high school” well that’s not good
[Joe Exotic voice] Some people have tigers to cope
Doc Antle has only been on screen for 30 seconds and already he has made himself memorable by directing the film crew
Is Bhagavan Antle Indian in some way or did he just have a really intense Eat Pray Love journey with his guru
Also is he really a doctor orrrrrrrrr
“I am out there in the forefront so known of being this guy that is in love with big cats and has them love him back” please don’t tell me this guy does anything weird to his animals
“People only care about saving what affects them”
“You can’t put a price on holding a baby tiger” but you did and apparently it’s $625
The fact that multiple tigers have had albinism is probably a sign of major inbreeding practices at these zoos
You know, even if I ate meat*, there is no way I would be able to handle any kind of early prep stage of it bc seeing these cow carcasses is A Lot
*If u r reading this I don’t care if u eat meat leave me alone
“Animals just wasn’t enough, okay? So then I started adding magic” well that took an unexpected turn
I don’t know if it’s for real fair to criticize every person who has brought a big cat out in a public venue/talk show because I know at least like Dave Sal/moni is always going “THESE ANIMALS MAKE TERRIBLE PETS”
As a sidenote from what I understand this Saff person keeps being deadnamed/misgendered throughout this documentary and I do not appreciate it
“I grew up a professional cowboy in a family of professional cowboys” every sentence on this show is a journey
WHO is letting their ONE-YEAR-OLD lay on top of a tiger cub I know you’re at a zoo but BRUH
“It’s going to be a small Waco” to say this ON THE NEWS
This 2 minute stretch of episode is all the PSA anyone ever needs to never own a gun
Well I think we can all agree that PETA is a fucking mess
God this is like battle of the people who are terrible at doing anything good for animals
“What do you carry that gun for?” “People” AHHHHHHHHHHH?!?!!!!?!?
“I sleep with an AK-47 under my mattress, loaded, ready to roll” WILL SOMEONE HELP THE U.S. OF A
I was warned about this show and yet I was still not prepared for the level of UNHINGED it would be
How in the FUCK does a place like this not have an on-site medic
“Why don’t you come back on another day” he said, after telling the public an employee had his arm taken off
“I am never gonna financially recover from this” SURE JOE THIS IS ABOUT YOU
To go back to work a WEEK after getting your arm amputated... BRUH
“Any law that you think’s unfair or unjustice, it is your obligation, it is your responsibility to stand up against that bullshit law” well Thomas Jefferson was a slaveowner so clearly the injustice thing was relative for him
Traditionally don’t drug addictions fuel people choosing extreme paths with their life rather than the other way around?
JKHGKJHGKJH this whole exchange:
Interviewer: What kind of doctor is he?
Maria: Mystical science.
Interviewer: Mystical science?
Maria, nodding: Yeah.
“How many wives does Doc Antle have?” I didn’t expect this but somehow it tracks
I’m gonna bet none of these people with subcontinental names have a single bit of South Asian heritage like okay “Moksha” and “Rajnee” did Bhagavan name you
On a more serious note: It’s really fucked up that these men keep meeting literal teenagers, making them their employees, and then also get into relationships with them. I cannot emphasize this strongly enough THIS IS NOT GOOD OR HEALTHY
It’s pretty weird that Doc Antle keeps emphasizing so frequently that one of his partners is Italian
“I’m gonna go be a yoga animal trainer” ah, white people bullshit
“Goodbye. Don’t fall in love with your boss.” Good advice, Dad
I was not expecting all this subcontinental imagery to get under my skin this badly but what’s your problem dude can’t u be normal for like a second
“You’re this garbage person, but if you listen to me, I’ll make you great” again this tracks but gross
Again, on a more serious note: if a partner ever talks to you this way please call a domestic abuse hotline
Not that India is at all in a good place right now but I personally ban Doc Antle from ever entering India. Banned. Forever. I will not be accepting constructive criticism at this time
“I didn’t really know any better” is a really good way of summarizing what all of these younger partners have been through
Wow Carole is really explaining this abuse issue succinctly
Antle’s indignation at being implied to be a cult leader despite the fact he is most definitely a cult leader
Joe’s story in his documentary is constantly “is this going to be a humanizing moment PSYCH it’s still terrible”
HOW IS THIS LEGAL PAY YOUR WORKERS A LIVING WAGE
Why is this husband-killing thing JUST A FOOTNOTE AT THE END OF THIS EPISODE OH MY GOD
We have deviated so far from the tiger thing oh my god
Why is the only man in this documentary who is faithful to his spouse the man that smuggled drugs inside of snakes
Every time I learn a new thing about a person in this documentary I have to reorient myself
This whole episode has been about this murder and I’m concerned that its title, “The Secret,” hasn’t even been revealed yet
GOD I take back what I said about I Saw Tiger, the concept of this song/music video for Here Kitty Kitty is so disturbing that this man deserves no credit whatsoever as a musician
CAROLE WHY ARE YOU GIGGLING ABOUT THE MEAT GRINDER IT’S NOT FUNNY
Well I don’t have much to say about this episode other than yikes
I guess if you’re really out to spite someone stealing their brand and posting exactly the opposite of everything they stand for is an effective if weird and petty way to do it
Do you think the whole throne footage moment was a “Frankenstein realizing what he has wrought” kind of thing for Kirkham
This is really like watching a sports game of two teams you can’t stand except the sport is murder and other miscellaneous crime
If we’re all being real with ourselves the documentary filmmakers themselves MUST have had some issues going on to be able to walk into this situation and not do anything about it
This series really seems to present a compelling case for why every major figure in this documentary has potentially committed at least one terrible crime
Ah there’s the judgment from the woman in Florida I guess it’s two crimes with one stone
God these poor animals they do not deserve anything happening to them
While obviously people are enticed by the prospect of someone they’re into having an animal JUST GET AN ALREADY DOMESTICATED ANIMAL LIKE DOMESTICATED CATS AND DOGS EXIST OH MY GOD DO NOT USE EXOTIC PETS AS DATE BAIT
It has been so long since we heard about Travis ngl I already forgot about him
Why is every single person in this show SO OFF THE WALLS I mean I know why but also WHY
This documentary is also a treatise in the flaws of the U.S. prison system and how it sets up people up to fail or re-offend upon release
Take a shot every time a middle-aged man in this show mentions that he casually bought himself a big cat as a teen
“Joe was the entertainment director.... by title” I don’t think this was meant to be a burn but what a burn
I am almost certain I WATCHED that Last Week Tonight episode during that election and if u told me that 4-5 years later I would be rewatching that clip in a documentary about this man’s journey to being convicted for murder then I cannot say I wouldn’t be surprised but I would probably believe it
Also I have to wonder what John Oliver thinks about being part of this
[“Beyonce?” voice] Shaun Majumder?
Sidenote: Until this exact moment I thought of Shaun Majumder as Ben Mulroney even though Brian Mulroney is white as hell I guess I have faceblindness but only for Canadian talkshow personalities
I have been aware of this before now but the fact you can buy a GUN at a Walmart what in the FUCK is U.S.A. doing
Man does this campaign manager really want to take ownership of anything Joe Exotic has ever done
Ngl I was wondering why someone who had at one point clearly had a lot of money seemed to have such poor dental care access but meth certainly does explain it
I mean people can be attracted to both men and women (hello) but since Joe was fuelling their drug addictions since they were teenagers attraction is at best a null factor and at worst an added layer of terrible to this whole mess
It’s hard to even respond to this in a meaningful way because this is so fucked up. Don’t own guns.
“That was a big fucking mistake,” he said, right after someone explained that he was driving large groups of people in an enclosed space in a busy city with wild animals that could maim or kill them
Padlock penls piercing really does not seem like a first date bombshell
“We went to dinner and he never went home” well if that doesn’t set you with a sense of foreboding
TWO MONTHS AFTER WHAT IN THE HELL OH MY GOD also I hope Dillon is okay
“It wasn’t about the animals anymore” you THINK
“It was sort of funny when they started but it’s gotten really dark” how meta
Of all the reasons Joe could’ve abandoned his zoo, I really didn’t think embezzlement would be what pushed him
“He won’t tell anyone where he’s at, not even me,” said Dial, with no acknowledgement of the fact that Joe is also theoretically still married and would maybe tell his husband???
Oh Dillon spotted??? Yikes get out dude
Take a shot every time a white person who really doesn’t understand where the word “karma” comes from starts talking about karma as if it is the Law of Revenge
The fact this man brings a film crew out with him while he’s on the run evading a federal investigation..... incomprehensible
“Joe just wanted to put it in somebody’s name and continue to be the tiger queen, I mean king,” really REALLY of all the reasons to object to Joe you’re going to choose homophobia wow
Is this about an attempt to have someone murdered or does something happen to Baskin it is very unclear
This documentary has an interesting format of switching focus from crime to crime to crime
“I’ve never been as proud of being married to anyone as I am being married to you” It’s weird to compliment your husband by comparing him to all your other husbands
How is the lesson for Jeff Lowe in this “let’s build another zoo” surely at that point it’s better to just cut your losses
[Garretson voice]: You should pay me for being a bro, dude
“I’m a libertarian, so technically, fuck the Feds,” I’ve never heard an intonation that better suits a conservative millennial
I mean I don’t think it was advisable but honestly why are people surprised Joe took the stand isn’t delusions of grandeur kind of his thing
Sometimes it’s just that they’ve added in other moments to break up the awful immoral crimes with just run of the mill douchebaggery like the nanny/gym thing huh
I guess the silver lining in this is that potentially these big cat zoos will shut down but like where do these animals who have been raised in captivity go??? I don’t trust anyone in this documentary to not exploit them in some way ugh
“Not a single animal benefited from this war,” correct, Saff
“I was wrapped up in having a zoo,” not really an excuse but ok
#tw: literally everything#ayesha says things#ayesha liveblogs tiger king#long post#u ever quarantine so hard u watch an entire docuseries in a night#no but seriously it would be hard to warn for everything but proceed with caution#liveblogging
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Ayesha Liveblogs Cardcaptor Sakura S1
For faithfulness reasons, I’ll forgo rewatching in English even though I’m Jared 19 and never learned how to read
I will say the original English dub had a BANGER of a theme song and I do miss that
"I’m a Fourth Grader at Tomoeda Elementary” I know I watched this like when I was age 7 or smth but SHE’S LIKE 10?? OH MY GOD who is letting this ten-year-old roam the streets
“I’m gonna stomp on him” [Lucille Bluth voice] good for her
I fully forgot Sakura had a dad I was ready to accept her Grade 11 brother raising her
Sakura’s roller blades give me visceral memories of my barbie skates
Lmao is Yuki’s ability to throw a piece of candy at a child from a moving bicycle backwards foreshadowing his superhero abilities
Okay having checked this scene in both English versions and Japanese, my opinion no one asked for: the Aminax version is bad voices on all counts, Japanese has a better voice for Toya and original English dub has a better voice for Sakura and Yukito (who they called Julian lmao) I am not accepting constructive criticism
Tomoyo and Sakura sound so similar I could not even tell that Tomoyo was speaking omg
“There isn’t anything cuter or more interesting than you Sakura-chan” Tomoyo is really honest with her feelings I guess ten-year-olds be like that sometimes
“Is someone there” home invasions are what happens when you don’t lock your front door
This is not a study lmao this is a personal library there is hardly a workspace just aisles of shelves
Oh shit The Clow WIND RAIN SHADOW WOOD SWORD POWER THUNDER SLEEP CARD CAPTORS OF THE CLOW EXPECT THE UNEXPECTED NOW
Wait if this is hanging out in her dad’s study was her dad the last Cardcaptor lmao
Or probs her mom, since she’s gone the way of all anime moms
Sakura is accepting this whole “tiny magical flying lion” thing p well
“I accidentally fell asleep” “For how long” “30 years” same
“Stand right over there” Kerberos does not ask permission before magical girl transforming you lmao
“Why are you acting so wimpy” bc she’s 10 and you’re asking her to fight a giant ghost bird???
Honestly I love a good quest-to-collect-important-items maybe Inuyasha and DBZ ruined my taste but it’s a great formula
“You’ll be a better adult if you have all sorts of experiences in your life” r u going to take career counselling advice from a tiny flying lion Sakura
I do kind of miss Kero’s slightly unhinged young man energy
I like that whenever Sakura’s brother is rude she steps on his foot or kicks him fkjhjgkh excellent little sister depiction
I was expecting more secrecy but it is very funny to see Tomoyo try to convince her friend to be a superhero
“Do a flashy one” kfhkjdhkj Kero supports the use of magic powers for showing off
“Trademark poses and skills are the basic parts of being a magical girl” oh my gooood
I mean if I walked into my school and there was a mountain of haphazard desks waiting there I too would be threatened
Sakura is the only one in this group who has a reasonable understanding of what ten-year-olds should be allowed to do
LMAO @ Tomoyo’s team of bodyguards dropping her off to break into the school ONLY TO DRIVE AWAY
Tomoyo and Kero’s friendship is killing me the SHENANIGANS
I’m not sure I accept this light logic bc you need light to cast a shadow
Sakura’s “heart-racing first date” ur TEN oh my god
I mean it’s nice that Sakura wants to save the penguin but why did it take that for her to get upset it was going to drown a whole adult woman
Did Toya just RIP APART a WHIRLPOOL with his BARE HANDS
I wonder how Toya feels that his little sister has a crush on his boyfriend lmao
This cell phone is really top of the line for 1999 lmao I love it
U know if I were a high school student and my friend asked my 10 year old sibling out to lunch instead of me I’d be confused
"They’re not even gonna hold hands? Kids these days” This is a VERY weird vibe for an episode
You know I guess if you never watch the second episode you never have context for all of these superhero outfits LMAO
None of these locations have security cameras I guess the 1990s was a lawless time
Will all of Yuki’s magical advice be delivered in the form of mysterious field trips
LMAO @ YUKITO ALWAYS TAKING SAKURA TO TOYA’S TEMP JOBS
Say what you will about the ominous influence of the other card, I think Wood is being fairly polite since it’s contorting around her house instead of destroying it lmao
“I was planning to film ‘Sakura Dances in the Jungle’ in the park today” I love Tomoyo
Every little girl in this show sounds so similar lmao this is not good for my distracted watching style
Wow Ms Maki is really unloading on these two fourth grade girls
Since Tomoyo clearly interacts with even the more spirit-like Clow Cards I really have to wonder why no one else in this town is seeing these giant ghost monsters loom around the city
Well I guess this episode is a direct response to my previous comment
“I can’t stand scary stories” says the girl who spends her nights going into isolated areas and fighting magical ghosts
Seeing Sakura activate her Fly card really gives me overwhelming nostalgia for the days I wanted nothing more than to be a Cardcaptor I used to wave around a toy broom like that magic key ahhhhhhhh
In the absence of the first English voice and with the added gentle Japanese intonation for his speaking, I am constantly forgetting that Yukito’s character is a 16-year-old boy
Toya is really casually bomb-dropping the fact that he used to see ghosts and Yuki’s just like ‘dope are there ghosts around now’
Omg Kero’s sad face as he dropped the flower in Sakura’s lap 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
“I want to see if she wants to tell me something” like maybe ‘don’t run around town at night chasing ghosts ur 10!!!’
UHHHH AGAIN TOYA REAL CASUAL ABOUT THE GHOST THING
Yukito Tsukishiro: Chronic Aid-er and Abet-er of Pre-teen Mischief
Also if I’m right his name means something like “Ice White Moon?” Very heavy-handed foreshadowing lmao
“After we left, I went to the museum again and borrowed one” TOMOYO U CASED THE JOINT KJDHFKJHF
WHY IS EVERY ELEMENTARY SCHOOL KID IN THIS TOWN ABLE TO BREAK INTO THIS MUSEUM SO EASILY
Tomoyo is eerily well-prepared for this mission it’s like she has been planning to burgle a museum all her life
They really made an executive choice to have both a Yuuki and a Yuki that was a decision that someone made
Oh hey it’s the other pre-teen supehero!!! That guy!!
The more I think about it, the stranger the height difference between Sakura and her brother becomes bc compared to him she’s really like 2.5 feet tall they did not pick a proportion scale
U see this what I mean by gentle intonation, Syaoran somehow sounds older than Yuki simple by roughness of voice
YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH TOYA U DEFEND UR SISTER
“Here, a steamed pork bun” Yuki sure nows how to de-escalate lmao
“That is made out of an insulator as well” Tomoyo is really prepared for any and every situation
It’s not fair of Li to compare what is probably years of magical training from his family to ‘trial by fire for eight weeks with a plush toy who doesn’t explain anything important until critical moments’
I’m really not sure what’s happening with Rika and the teacher but I DON’T LIKE IT
“I just want to be with you as long as possible” [cut to floral pattern] Tomoyo is aiming to supersede Yuki as Gentle Shojo Protagonist Sakura Fixates On looool
I’m sure there’s NOTHING significant about this familiar-looking sword brooch
Kero biting Li whenever whenever he says something rude to Sakura kghkjghk direct feminist action
What IS THIS business with Li running away flustered like that are pre-teen Cardcaptors ONLY allowed to have a crush on Yukito
“I guess I’ll have to beat him up once” Toya has zero qualms about fighting a ten-year-old
Two fourth graders giving Yukito chocolate while he peacefully hangs out with his boyfriend is the funniest version of executing this weirdness that could happen
What I’m really wondering is how the hell they cut out or explained away Li’s crush in the first English anime
“You were just a fledgling teacher and you married one of your [high school] students!!” u did WHAT what the FUCK MR. KINOMOTO I’m on Sonomi’s side
“Mother got married when she was 16″ MR. KINOMOTO CANCELLED! BANNED! THE HELL IS THIS!
“It was I who was granted time with Nadeshiko from her 16th to 27th birthdays” GO 2 JAIL DO NOT PASS GO
This episode has added a lot of layers to this show none of which I like
“What kind of person was my dad” someone who should be banned from teaching
“Your father is a disgusting person” WELL
SONOMI I KNOW UR TRYING TO BE NICE BUT HE HAS AT LEAST ONE MAJOR FLAW
Lmao they’re not even giving context why Yuki is around anymore he’s just an accepted artifact of the Kinomoto household
How is that the Time card is Li’s but not Thunder since he also returned that one to its original form
“Their fastest confirmed speed is over 100km/h” Yamazaki leave Li alone he just wants to adore the sloths jhfkhgjhgkhg
Ahhhhhh Li helping Sakura get the Power card?? These motives are quite hard to read but it seems sweet
OMGGG @ TOMOYO MAKING SAKURA DEADLIFT A PLAYGROUND
“I heard a rumour that everyone who asked Kinomoto out has been denied.” Well. [x]
“It’s one of the seven strangest things at this school, that both Kinomoto and Tsukishiro don’t have girlfriends.” WELL. [x]
AWWWWW YUKI DOESN’T LEAVE THE OTHER PRE-TEEN FAN CLUB MEMBERS OUT OF HIS KIND GESTURES
[Hannibal Buress voice] I was so caught up in euphoria of festival arcs, that for like a minute I lived in a world where the rest of this anime didn’t exist
TOYA BEING THE STAR OF DRAG CINDERELLA... OP UR MIND
I have no idea what the premise of the next Clow Card is but I really hope it’s “turn u into whatever ur acting as” bc I will LOSE my mind
I have not heard Yuki once intone as passionately as he did when he thought Toya was going to fall
“You like someone else” 👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀
“I didn’t promise anyone else a dance” Can I just say I LOVE TOYA?
The moment of stillness before Yukito revealed who he was asking to dance lmao... the repressed teenage wlw inside me LIVES
Yuki and Toya tag-teaming as the Sakura Support Team my heart!!
Geolocating someone from a fax... the incredible 90sness of this act....
I seriously don’t understand this world in which you leave 5- and 10-year-olds unattended for hours where are your child welfare laws
I am really choosing to ignore how absolutely bananas the concept of Tomoyo having a hidden Sakura Movie Theatre is
Speaking of weird, are we just trusting that this old man is normal? Is everyone doing that? I’m still not ready to trust yet the Sakura’s dad situation really burned me
“Girls look their best when they smile” a sweet thought that would not fly if an old man I just met told me that lmao
I’m REALLY not trusting this old man dressing up this girl in his dead (missing?) granddaughter’s clothes and staring broodily when she mentions there is a parent with her
“My great-granddaughter seemed happy” YOUR WHAT NOW
Their school trips seem much more fun than ours were we never went to the beach or fishing or got disappeared briefly in a cave
It continues to be funny how Sakura and Li have 0% tension re: Clow Cards, 99% tension re: Yukito who is already in a committed Something or the Other with Sakura’s brother
“Why were you on the roof” “Because it’s nice out today” LOL YUKITO
There’s no rhyme or reason to these card types huh some are like “I will destroy an entire zoo for fun” and other ones are like “mood lighting :)”
Sakura really isn’t out here to teach us any lessons lol it’s really a ‘get others to do your homework if you can get away with it’ episode
Rounding out the triad of superpowered pre-teens with Meilin I suppose
“Syaoran is my fiance” I have had it up to HERE with this anime cousinfuckery I don’t CARE if it’s cool in Japan or Hong Kong or whatever STOP BEING WEIRD WITH YOUR COUSINS
Poor Syaoran he was doing so well with getting along with Sakura until Meilin got here
"It was done by a girl again?” Oh my god is Meilin beating up grown men in parks for street cred
“It seems our relationship chart has gotten rather complicated” Tomoyo probably means astrology chart but here’s my understanding so far:
Speaking of complex relationships I wonder how Meilin will react to Syaoran’s crush on Yuki
This rivalry between Sakura and Meilin could not be more one-sided
I really was wondering for a second if the card was going to split in half
I love the vibe of Sakura and Toya teaming up to help their creepy dad but even MORE SO I love that Yukito is In This Household
“The contents are already up here” This episode really doesn’t hit the same way now that cloud storage exists and also what were all those floppy disks for if not to save your work Mr. Kinomoto
I love that Tomoyo always pulls her weight in her superhero sidekick role like she is here to support and help whenever needed
Sakura using her powers to impress her crush with a ghost duet lmao these priorities
“Sakura’s Little Adventure” I see what u did there
Kero’s little shoulder pat with his paw to let Sakura know he’s there aw
Omg this Clow Card is so cute “Is it your fault I’m so small now?” [nods pleasantly]
It is very bold of Sakura to be doing magic so casually when her brother and Yuki are right downstairs
I like that this show recognizes the inherent intimacy of allowing someone to cut your hair
“Information about you has gotten around to the cards” well this is an ominous start to this funky tarot reading
Well the experience of seeing his little sister try to murder him has got to be traumatizing for Toya I hope he doesn’t remember this
UMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM DID TOYA JUST FALL OFF OF A CLIFF
“Can you give me a break... and stop looking like Sakura” EXCUSE ME
“My mom’s up there too, so say hi to her for me” OH MY GOOOOD TOYA REALLY DOES SEE GHOSTS AHHHHHHHHHHH
WAIT SO IT WAS A CLOW CARD DOES TOYA HAVE MAGICAL POWERS TOO
Omg @ Toya feeding Yuki from his bed this really is an intimate episode
I kind of appreciate the slow build of this show like it took them 25 episodes to introduce meaningful stakes
“But it might be tougher than the earth going ‘boom!’ Depending on who you are...” Well hello threatening figure in sunglasses standing outside Sakura’s house what’s up
“I’ll look the other way” Ms Mizuki is literally this meme:
I can only assume that if Toya knows Ms. Mizuki then she must be a ghost
Personally if Mizuki gives Syaoran the heebie jeebies I trust his instincts
“Um... do you like Yukito too?” Oh my goooood they’re sincerely discussing being Not Straight in middle school in this 90s anime that I watched when I was 7 I cannot believe
“And it’s been a year since you told me you loved me here” WHY DOES EVERYONE IN THIS FAMILY WANT TO DATE SOMEONE TOO OLD FOR THEM WHAT THE FUCK WERE YOU DOING DATING SOMEONE TOYA’S AGE MIZUKI
Also I have to rethink every thought I had about Toya being gay. I mean bi is great too but my thoughts..... racing...........
“Because the next time I see you, you’ll have someone else that you’ll be in love with” Yukito BF confirmed but oh my GOD this relationship chart IS complicated good lord
If there’s anything the episode “Sakura and Her Shrine of Memories” has taught me it’s that everyone in this show is bisexual and all teachers in their neighbourhood should be in jail
I understand that Meilin is a kid but poor Syaoran he is constantly being harassed
I love Yuki’s bottomless stomach lmao
Syaoran and Sakura have such a genuinely supportive relationship but it is very funny how they try simultaneously to get Yuki’s attention with the exact same words
“I’ve been thinking for a while that Mr. Terada is a lot like my dad” oh thank you Rika for someone finally being normal in this show
“Well it’s a harmless one” You see this is what I mean the dichotomy of Clow Cards is like... “I’m going trap you in a maze until you perish” or “I’m gonna give you a sugar rush :]”
I like that Sakura and Syaoran are starting to partner up as a duo on purpose like yessss I love a 1-2 finish and friendship development
Ahhh poor Syaoran he’s realizing that Yukito’s #1 in his life is the Kinomoto fam
We’re all familiar with the eternal struggle of whether using ur superpowers for school sports is cheating
AWWW SYAORAN USING HIS POWERS FOR MAGICAL PEP TALKS AFTER HE HELPED TURN REI’S PET FOX INTO A POKEMON CARD THAT’S MY BOOOOY
“I will stomp on him” it’s been 31 episodes let Sakura stomp on her brother
Oh my GOOOD does this Big card mean that Sakura WILL FINALLY STOMP ON TOYA LMAO
Ur telling me that no one else in this ENTIRE TOWN notices this altercation of a giant preteen vs a dragon
Why does the logic for how voices travel based on size apply for the Little card (when Toya was speaking) and not for the Big card (when Sakura is speaking)
Sgskdhgkhkgjh honestly body switching as a trope will never not be funny
Syaoran blushing and running away from Sakura oh how the turn tables
Every domestic scene that Yuki and Toya have adds ten years to my life we love some gay/bi teens about to be gay/bi adults
Ffskhhfkj I absolutely cannot relate to this Southern Hemisphere nonsense of finding ten degrees celsius arctic cold like BRO that is a normal spring day here
“We’re not frozen because we have magical powers” I know that cutaway was to confirm Mizuki’s magical powers again but this would’ve been a hilarious time to reveal that like Yamazaki the Compulsively Lying Classmate had powers
Awwww he likes her now that’s cute
“I got work that day” I will bet someone ten dollars that Toya is working at that quiz rally
Update from 5 minutes later: PAYPAL ME $10
Kero keeps whispering to the moon when in fact some iteration of the moon is right around the corner (literally)
GOOOOOOOOD SYAORAN REALIZING HE HAS A CRUSH ON BOTH HALVES OF THAT TEAM KILLS ME SWEET BOY
Shared Gaze of People Who Have Dated* Toya and Have Magical Powers They Haven’t Revealed Yet
*Go to jail Mizuki
I am really going crazy wondering when they’re gonna reveal stuff about Yukito like bitchhhhhhh I know you’re a moon man when will u tellll usss
How many more times will Sakura have this same threatening dream before she realizes her math teacher is probably going to try to kill her
Update from one minute later: I guess it was exactly one more time
“That’s right, Yukito’s birthday is on Christmas day” is this coming to be a coming of age where he like suddenly sprouts wings at age 17
I’ve been thinking this for a while but this show makes it seem like Japan has a much more fun approach to athletics than my school experiences
Yukito really is unflappable about hanging out with a bunch of kids half his height huh he’s like the Fourth Grader Whisperer
I KNEW IT YUKITO NEVER GOES WITH SAKURA ANYWHERE UNLESS HER BROTHER WILL ALSO BE WORKING THERE DFHKDFHKJ every time it’s just “Hey Toya :)”
“This kid...” HAHAH TOYA HAS JUST REALIZED THAT SYAORAN HAS A CRUSH ON HIS LITTLE SISTER AND HIS BOYFRIEND THE UTTER SUSPICION IN HIS TONE
“Wind become a binding chain” Whoops Sakura foiled by 4th grade knowledge of the elements
Oh shiiiit love a world-building moment now we have two card combos in play ayyyyy
Lmao @ Kero using his returned powers immediately for fireworks mood lighting is a serious Clow Card priority
“I would like to come again this year” everything in this show feels like foreshadowing for dramatic irony
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Ayesha Liveblogs One Tree Hill S1
No matter how many times I watch the pilot I consistently forget that Nathan and Peyton used to date
“Don��t bother showering tonight” is that really your come-on Peyton I will never understand sports
Lmao @ Nathan and Peyton “OTP: Distracted Driving”
“You’re despicable, you know that,” said Dan, a literal future murderer
I’m always so thrown when ppl in shows start drinking at their workplaces like what kind of bold behaviour Whitey you work at a high school
“What are you wasting your time at now?” Nathan ur a terrible boyfriend
“I say that the people who pray here are wasting their time. God doesn’t watch sports” I know Lucas is pretentious as all hell but this is my favourite line in any sports show ever
Karen is such a good mom ahhhhh like she just wants Lucas to be happy and she knows he’ll put other people’s happiness first
Dan calling Lucas ‘this kid’ like he’s not his wholeass son what a dick
It’s not lost on me that Keith telling Lucas stories about his father means that it’s Lucas’s grandfather Keith Scott is truly the only dad in this show who matters
“So why’d you just tell me all that” because he loves to monologue
“If I could [change the fact that Lucas exists], I would” Dan answer your door I need to send you a very rude telegram
I am in love with Moira Kelly and also I want Karen to punch Dan
The music of this show is really.... transcendent
Djhfkjhfkjh since Lucas is implied to have like, five friends.... is that crowd of supporters hugging him just a bunch of people who think Nathan is a dick
I admire Lucas for deciding he was gonna put up with all this bullshit to do something he loves
Omg I forgot that Brooke wasn’t in the pilot she’s such a major character
“Nice hands” “Nice legs” Emo flirting in a jock setting lmaooooo
My inner 2007 angst awakens every time I hear Gavin Degraw. He is THAT bitch
“You ever think I might want to talk” Peyton and Nathan’s relationship is truly nothing but blind horniness they have nothing in common at all in this juncture of their lives
“I didn’t invite you to come in, I just asked if you wanted to” Peyton is so weird but I kind of want to marry her. Is this what Lucas feels like
Lucas’s economic status is really part of Brooke’s romance criteria at the age of 17 they teach the bourgeois early huh
Oh my god I cannot BELIEVE Jake recommended Atlas Shrugged to Lucas jhjhgjhgjh the undertones of this basketball show really are about capitalism
HAHAHAH Nathan’s word being “revenge” calm down Sasuke Uchiha
I haven’t said so yet but Haley is so very endearing she’s great
God. Lucas turning around to reveal to Dan that he’s cast away his name. HE is that bitch
Ghjkghjkgh Keith hissing at the rude Boosters mum. Love of my life
“Maybe he’s gay” “No, I think he’s just nice” who writes this dumbass show
“Do you even care that it’s slipping away” maybe it’s because I went away for university but the idea that someone is this deeply invested in their kid’s high school basketball career is. A lot
Nathan simultaneously trying to bother Lucas and pass English while about to fall in love: I can multitask!!!
Update: He also managed to trash Lucas’s favourite basketball court somehow in all his business. He really can multitask!
“If it makes you feel any better I called some woman a bitch the other day” [giggle] I love Karen and Lucas’s relationship
Haley is such a good friend to Lucas and hoo boy Nathan when do you grow a conscience
“You’re both so broody. You could brood together” that’s it, that’s Peyton and Lucas
These emails and VCR references are really dating this show
Nathan is a straight up sociopath in these early eps my god he humiliates Lucas publicly twice at this party and just pops over to Haley like “Hey cutie :) Idk why Lucas is so mad :) I’m rlly nice :)”
Nathan really taking his girlfriend’s car to hit on another woman how much of a crapbag
As soon as I said this he (drunk?) drove her car into a streetlight my god
Deb and Karen having a nice lesbian coffee shop AU would be a pleasant turn in this show instead of literally anything that happens in either of their narratives
“Why would you even go there” “Because I loved getting dumped on” That is... accurate
“I’ll call you when you’re not so PMS” said Nathan, when his (ex) girlfriend rightfully lambasted him for crashing her car
I take it back Peyton and Nathan do have one thing in common it’s their disregard for traffic laws
HELL YEAH Keith IS your dad Lucas <3 <3 <3 <3
Whitey talks a lot of shit for someone who advised Dan to abandon Luke
I had been wondering why Lucas had the Scott name when Dan is such an ephemeral piece of shit and I guess there’s my answer thanks Karen
Does Haley ever find out about the shit Nathan pulled at the party I feel like these are relevant details in her budding affection
“Dad send you to spy on me? Poison my drink?” This is the second time in two episodes Deb has been accused of being Dan’s spy I wonder if she still considers that a red flag 17 years into marriage
“One of the boys doesn’t have a father” BUUUUURN Dan
Rhkgjhgjkh the last moment of this scene:
Keith: There is enough room in my heart for each of my brother’s mistreated sons even the rude ones Nathan
Nathan, experiencing a split second of paternal love: :O
Ghkjghkjgh the Scott bonding in hatred of Dan continues with Lucas asking Nathan if he too would like to spite Dan:
Lucas: You will be receiving your “I Hate Dan Scott” Club invitation in the mail shortly Nathan, mom, Uncle Keith and I hold meetings biweekly
Nathan: Biweekly as in every two weeks or twice a week
Lucas: Both! See you on Tuesday
“Does this mean we’re dating” yes it does the mixed CD is emo code
“Good luck with your game” “yeah, you too, Ma” hehehehe
Someone revoke this college medic’s license hoo boy
Ghjghkgh Lucas keeping his money tucked into his boxers what a doofus
I can’t believe Nathan and Lucas’s second big bonding moment is threatening dudes while in their boxers after beating on each other what a brotherly bond lmao
Okay but highkey if ur a lady and ur friends are gonna leave you alone and vulnerable at night get new friends
“I can live without my shirt” Nathan is thirteen shades of petty lmaooo
Dan is such a bad (abusive) father that Nathan literally would prefer to have none at all my god
“Can I tell you a secret? I pretended too” just get marrrried
“Thanks for cutting Lucas some slack” talk about accepting the bare minimum Haley kjhgkjhgkj
Brooke is really unbearable in this episode is it any wonder her, Lucas and Peyton’s relationship is as dysfunctional as it will soon become
Hoo boy the one (1) time Nathan doesn’t do something douchey and he gets blamed for it
LMAO @ Lucas approaching the one girl at this school with commitment issues with a bold “I wanna be here [in your heart]” hahaha
“Yeah, they can have their world,” said Lucas to Haley, about the two people they would literally go on to marry
The fact that Peyton doesn’t turn off her webcam and just covers it also really speaks to the era
This Gabe dude is really ready to assault a minor like he’s not just a r*pist he’s also a predator double KO
It is not lost upon me that it looks like one pill has been popped out before so he is also a serial r*pist big fucking yikes
“What, you got a cellphone too, dawg? Things sure have changed” also quite dated hahahaha
They really went out of the way to redeem Brooke not only did she give Nathan and Haley a very very cute date she also saved her friend from being assaulted
“So you don’t have any brothers, do you” jhgkhgkhg Brooke please
“Why are you only nice to me when we’re alone” a very legitimate question Haley
Nathan’s dating methodology: There’s nothing in life that can’t be solved with make-outs
Deb is really so nice but every time I look at her I think of her drinking a lot and sleeping with Nathan’s friends lmao
Haha that North Carolina sign explains the mild Southern accents
Aieeeeeeeeeee you kiss that man and follow your dreams Karen
Even if Nathan is still A Lot this season him and Haley are so cute:
Haley, smiling: We can’t do this here right now
Nathan, giggling: We just did
Lucas says more to Dan by constantly leaving with a look of disgust than any words ever could
“My heart’s racing too. That’s what happens when I’m around you. (And on drugs. I’m very unstable Haley.)”
Lucas and Nathan’s very intentional “pressure from your dad” and “you don’t know anything about my dad” bc Lucas will not acknowledge that Senor Crabag Sr. is anything resembling a father bless
Drunk tattoos with crush’s bff Lucas has decided to make all mistakes at once and I respect it
Poor Keith he is trying his best but Lucas just chose this week to hit his rebellious phase
YESSSSSSSSSS DEB KICK THAT ASS OUT OF THIS HOUSE
“Do you really think that Nathan would choose you over me” uh???? Are you not aware you are... the worst father in town
Brooke you were fully aware of Peyton and Lucas’s vibing and actively pursued him/interfered so you have no moral high ground to be like “:) I’d never choose a boy over my friendship”
Skillz and Mouth accurate “hoo boy don’t look” when ur friends start PDA
“Mom doesn’t want things to get back to normal, she wants them to be better” hell yeah Nathan gaining emotional intelligence
Lucas quit projecting your childhood issues onto Jake he too is a child let him decide how he wants to live Jenny’s 6 months old not like she’s gonna remember lmao
Damn Nathan LET LOOSE on Dan fuck that dude
JGFHJGFJGFJH I forgot Gavin Degraw had a cameo hahahahah
Did Luke.......... break into Jake’s house. His parents work at night how was he able to get into Jake’s coffee table
“You do not have to feel like a third wheel” The pure dumbass energy.... Peyton is literally CRYING do u really think her issue is “third wheel” you KNOW she and Lucas had a thing Brooke???????
Me watching this team form a brotherly bond over their mutual love of basketball: Mayhaps sports are... good
Hahahaha Lucas threatening Peyton’s dad with a rake is weirdly endearing
“Hey you.” “Hey you, and you,” is a good summary of this seasons Brooke/Lucas/Peyton dynamic lmao
Why is Dan’s head... shaped that away. It is like a bar of soap
“I don’t mind you playing ‘Daddy’ to one of my offspring, but leave the good one alone, will you?” Dan. Meet me in the Denny’s parking lot at midnight and we’ll have words
“The whole Nice Guy thing is wearing kind of thin” foreshadowing for all the dick moves Lucas is about to pull lmao
“He’s got you skipping school now?” “Lucas talk to me when you get your tattoo removed”
Lucas:
Lucas is such a meddler lmao how many family dynamics is he going to alter
I don’t trust Dan being nice for a minute all he wants is the upper hand with Deb in the inevitable custody battle over Nathan
Props to Nathan and Haley for somehow, some way, being the only normal couple on this show despite their incredibly dubious origins lmao
Scott family dinners are bananas I count four (4) major revelations and they haven’t even revealed that Deb and Dan are separated
Lucas and Peyton are really hitting every fictional couple trope in this ep - road trip, bed sharing, hurt/comfort, truly the YA bases
“The truth? In this house?” Props to Deb for drama lmao
Brooke saying ‘I love you’ you’ve been dating for like two episodes but okay kjhgkjhg
I can’t say I understand Nathan’s logic lmao but I guess they have to bring him back to basketball sometime
Wow Lucas zero hesitation on that second kiss lmao u r a mess
This scene is the definition of “that escalated quickly” they go straight to undressing
HAHAHAH NATHAN BEING SHIRTLESS IN HALEY’S DREAM FOR NO REASON 10/10 TEENAGE ACCURACY
“How do you explain being with me and not her?” “Because with you, I saw a future” that’s Dan code for ‘I’m a gold digger’
You’re literally macking on Peyton in the middle of the hallway while you’re dating the other most popular girl in school Lucas how are you this ridiculous and bold BREAK UP WITH BROOKE U DUMBASS
“So what are we going to do” I’ll tell you what you should do BREAK UP WITH BROOKE
Keith it is still daylight out stop bringing alcohol into this high school you have a drinking problem
“Can’t control love, you know?” THAT’S NOT ADVICE LUCAS BREAK UP WITH BROOKE
I really can’t handle watching Keith and Lucas self-destruct this episode how is Nathan the only Scott in a happy, healthy relationship
“You know that this is... wrong, so that makes it feel... deeper?” Lucas asks, as if he were not entirely in the wrong by carrying on with Peyton (who is not in a relationship) while dating Brooke
“I don’t want to hurt Brooke,” he said, about to start his third secret cheating makeout session of the week
“But then again our spouses aren’t here are they” [Deb opens door] COMEDIC TIMING
Gjjhgkjhg Nathan revealing his messed up intentions with Haley entirely by accident Scotts have no self-control whatsoever it’s their kekkei genkai
Lucas evading responsibility for his romance crimes by literally dying
Hahahah Karen’s confused vibes at Brooke are kind of the highlight of this episode
How funny would it be if Lucas woke up to Karen scolding him about his tattoo
Hahahaha for such dysfunctional partners Nathan and Peyton are excellent exes
AHHHHHHHHH LUCAS WAKING UP TO HIS BROTHER... MY HEART
Keith rlly was gonna propose after zero (0) days of dating I’m telling you no self-control is truly the Scott clan kekkei genkai
Ahhhh bless Karen’s compassion
Dan is literally blackmailing his son into staying in his custody he is in Deb’s words an “abusive son of a bitch”
Fucking finally Lucas ends this sham of a relationship with Brooke
It’s wild that Nathan is the only Scott with a happy and healthy romantic relationship
Nathan divorcing his parents is a real power move
I’m glad Haley announced Sheryl Crow’s name because let me tell you I would not have recognized her on sight
“How’s my daughter” Lucas really chooses exclusively to hook up with people who have devastating emotional consequences for his immediate friend group huh
“Funny I didn’t know you were forgiving at all” Lmao Peyton is that really the position you’re going to take after cheating with your best friend’s boyfriend
All the deodorant product placement lmao ‘this ep sponsored by Secret’
All things considered I think Lucas is handling Haley’s constant ditching p well
Bfhkghghjg Keith buying a new shirt just to go to dinner with Karen stop
OH MY GOD THE EP REALLY WAS SPONSORED BY SECRET IT’S GOT SECRET ON THE CHEER COMPETITION BANNERS AND A LITTLE GIFT BAG RANDOMLY IN ALL THE CHEERLEADER CONFRONTATIONS JKGHKJGH
The comedic timing of “hungover idiots” panning to Karen and Larry kills me
“She used to be this totally original.... Haley” what does this mean????
I don’t think Nathan and Haley are being entirely fair to Lucas bc he was only a dick once she ditched him twice (or thrice?) in one weekend
This boy toy auction as a concept is so inappropriate on so many levels
“I get Nathan for free” Fhjkfhkfjh Haley pls
God I was so very concerned about whether or not Nathan and Peyton were gonna kiss
“You’re not a mess, you’re just in love” [Ole Del Paso Girl voice] Why not both?
“She’s nine months old, just in case you forgot” to be fair I assume Nikki gave birth so she would remember that you can’t hold that one over her
It must take Lucas some mental disconnect to assume Peyton and Nathan are cheating when he also kissed Haley
Fhjfhkjfhjfh Keith fulfilling my fave trope of ‘we are not even dating but how about we get married bc we’ve been repressed in love for years’
“You know I asked your mom to get an abortion,” said Dan, to his literal son
I really can’t figure where this pregnancy storyline is going bc I know Brooke doesn’t have a baby
Nathan and Haley really need to consider oral or smth there’s a middle ground between making out and having vaginal sex
“It all hurts just the same” Brooke really out here trying to say that cheating is in any way equivalent to faking a pregnancy (even if only for a week)
Peyton and Brooke are way more invested in each other than Lucas
“I got you a high five” Hahahhaa I love Peyton
Gary like: Wow Nathan it’s humanizing that your father is an abusive dick
“Maybe this is the one that changed him” Lucas joining Dan as the second and only non-Dan member of the Dan Scott Apologism Club
It’s wholly unreasonable that Haley expects her boyfriend not to look at p*rn lmao
I love all this Lucas and Nathan bonding but I hate that it comes at the cost of Dan being near them at all u stay away from those boys u manipulative fuck
Ah the foreshadowing about Peyton changing in front of her webcam finally pays off
I’m no legal expert but I don’t think that taking your daughter out of state will help you in the custody battle in the long term Jake - nor will dropping out of high school
“What do I get out of it” r u 4 real Keith u dont get payment for loving your family
“I’m leaving because I can’t look at you anymore without my heart breaking” I like you Keith but that sounds like a You Problem
This is a fun way to shoot this episode One Tree Hill has such good directing tbh
Nathan discarding the Scott name from his jersey just like Lucas did in ep 2:
Haley: Having sex will solve all of my problems Nathan what are you talking about
I remembered that at some point Deb and Keith have sex and I’m glad they fuck things up early bc I could not deal if it was later on
“I’ll miss you too, little brother” 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
KJKGHKJHGJHKJHGKJHKJ I CAN’T BELIEVE NATHAN AND HALEY GOT MARRIED JUST TO HAVE SEX THIS IS WHY THEY DON’T LET PEOPLE YOUNGER THAN 18 VOTE
#ayesha says things#ayesha liveblogs oth#liveblogging#long post#a very long post lmao#one tree hill#this is the kind of content i make now lol
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Ayesha Liveblogs Naruto Shippuden S21
What a tender intro omg also why is this filler so well animated
The introduction of modern technology will never not be funny to me. Kakashi on a laptop. Gaara sending emails. What has the ninja world come to
I know it’s just superfluous background motion but that angry little cat design was amazing. Takes me tf out
Hello again New English Iruka Voice time to feel slightly uncomfortable
Doesn’t Inuyasha have a monopoly on this baby with a red ball imagery
Why! Is! No one! Making sure! Naruto is fed! He’s a baby!!!!!!
Naruto and Sasuke were such adorable children my heart
SOMEONE PLEASE EXPLAIN THE FAMILY WHERE ONE OF THE CHILDREN IS JUST A FROG? WHO IS DOING THESE BACKGROUND ANIMATIONS?????
In case you thought I wasn’t being literal:
[Accompanying dialogue to this image: “Did you hear the rumours that Lord Fourth died because of him?” WHO IS THIS FROG CHILD WITH A VENDETTA AGAINST MINATO]
This ninja cowboy music seems slightly misplaced but okay
Hiruzen. U r the literal ninja president. Naruto is foraging in the forest for food bc no one is taking care of him! How r u like ‘Hahah I’m hungry too :D’
“The things that we inconsequential humans worry about are often very petty indeed” “You’re right” It’s Philosophy Hours ft. Pre-Schoolers
“Are you sure these mushrooms are safe to eat? “Won’t know ‘til we eat ‘em” HIRUZEN PICK UP THE PHONE
SCREAMS FIVE YEAR OLD NARUTO JUST JUMPED OFF THE HOKAGE MONUMENT AHHHHHH
I miss Neji :((((((((((((((((
“Please make sure that you look after Neji” show us Neji’s mum you cowards!!!
“You have to be more positive, and confident!” Nejiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii my boy
“I wish that I could switch places with you, big brother” There’s a lot to unpack here and I’m wildly concerned about all of it. This episode ought to be titled Konoha Desperately Requires Child Welfare Programs
Making an mini-episode which largely depicts Neji’s tragic backstory and centring its ending on Hinata seems like an odd angle to take
“I’m alone. I don’t have anyone, but I never cry” NARUTOOOOO
KJHFKJHG THIS NINJA BASEBALL OUTRO I LOVE IT
SASUKE USING HIS SHARINGAN TO CHEAT AT BASEBALL I WHEEZE
Also not that I don’t like Genma but why is he a central figure in this ending. Has he had more than a single conversation with Naruto in his life
Lmao @ Sasuke and Itachi’s child versions going back to having their adult voices. Pick a lane SP!!!
“Things in season are always cheap and tasty” “Oh, is that so, Sasuke? Hahaha” Sasuke learning about the ninja economy
“We’re going to visit your mother’s family” Two questions: 1) Aren’t your families the same family (eep) and 2) Don’t they all live in the same part of the village
90% of this dialogue is recycled from prior episodes except delivered more slowly and it’s a little confusing
Itachi sure knows a lot about cooking for an eleven-year-old
Sasuke being a clumsy child is such a cute character detail ahhhh I love him so much 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
“[Confused laughter] You want to be like me?” What a Mood Itachi
Sakura’s hideout in the woods is so sweet yes 2 semi-normal childhoods
Poor little Sakura already concerned about her appearance they never let girls live do they
“You’re really cute Sakura, don’t hide it” Ino and Sakura are the most adorable children in the WORLD I love their relationship 4ever
“If she’s cute like you say, then I would love to meet her” who will stop all men
“But Ino, aren’t you good friends with Sakura?” “No, not really” Okay not to project but. I have a lot of thoughts on this narrative
GASP Inner Sakura’s first appearance!!
Tiny Team 7 is all I need in the world honestly I would watch a whole show that was just those three growing up
I have only just now noticed Suigetsu as third baseman. This ninja baseball game and season in general raise so many questions
Noooo Gaara don’t cry you are gonna be so loved in the future
Rasa, can I just say, from the bottom of my heart, I’m going to yeet you into the sun
“When I look up at the sky, the pain inside my heart feels a little bit better” He’s like 4!!!!!!! >:(
“Instead of a mother, you get to have me, Lord Gaara” Yashamaru: Self-Diagnosed Mumncle
Ngl baby Gaara’s recollection of Karura is nothing like she looked like
I really don’t care for this new Iruka voice I just keep listening to him like ‘that’s not the sound of Naruto’s dad!!’
I will admit him spooking the sleeping children was cute I don’t know why I always find that so funny kjhgkjhg
“Let me buy into this fight” who taught seven-year-old Naruto to gamble
Christ alive the implication that Naruto has been doing the sexy jutsu since he was seven who will put this boy in ninja therapy
If Orochimaru had just continued to be Jiraiya’s long-suffering friend he might be half-endearing but alas he is fecal matter personified
“Come on out, I made plenty, so you might as well stay and eat” Hjgjfjgfgffg I’m not sure what’s funnier about this scene the implication that Obito and Rin both independently followed Kakashi home without noticing each other, or that Kakashi did notice and rather than question this turn of events was just like “Guess I should make more fish”
“When you’re older, do you think you’ll become a chef” I would pay to see the AU where Kakashi becomes a professional chef why couldn’t that have been his Road to Ninja persona
Ngl I spent the first half of Kakashi’s minisode wondering if Sakumo was dead or simply too depressed to take care of Kakashi and I think dead is the less upsetting outcome
“It’s no fun when you’re not around, Kakashi” Obitooooooooooooooo
I’m not saying it’s suspicious that Sakumo is given two different depictions of his grave site in the anime but Sakumo fucked an alien and I stand by that statement
All I remember from Sasuke Shinden is that a character called Sasuke “Sassy” as a nickname and if they do that in the Eng dub I won’t survive
“[Deep sigh] Alright Sakura, what is it?” Fhfjhfkjh what’s your damage Kakashi can’t your kids come to visit when people start exploding
God Sakura and Ino’s relationship is the realest.... she went to the Hokage bc her gal was worried abt her family friend and then comforted her from her loss... the looooooooove
Hinata not to devalue your work in any way but why did u collapse after poking one (1) man in the chakra point isn’t gentle fist based in taijutsu
Fhjfhkjhf I’ve seen that gif before of Kakashi knowing that Sakura was thinking about Sasuke but it’s still funny
Sasuke just hanging in the woods with kittycats what kinda redemption journey is this lmao
Ehehehe I’m still not over the fact that Sasuke recognizes Sai’s jutsu and Kakashi uses it to communicate like there are six members of team 7 and this arc PROVES IT HELL YEAH
I can’t believe I forgot the circus ninja oh my god
“There’s good money to be found for performers like us” MOVE OVER EXPLODING HUMANS WHERE’S MY EPISODE ABOUT THE NINJA CIRCUS
Everyone always commenting on the pupils and sclera of the Hyuga and Uchiha but nobody caring about Old Man Demon Eyes from the Bamboo Village:
You’d think at this point no amount of genjutsu could traumatize Sasuke
They’re leaning wholeheartedly into the ninja cowboy music
That is not how I thought they would pronounce “Sassy” this show is full of twists and turns
“What about reviving the Uchiha clan? You’re the lone survivor right?” said Chino, inquiring about when Sasuke was planning to have vaginal sex
“You really think you’re going to find him inside that seriously scary looking cave?” GASP IT’S TENZO TIME
AIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIE IT’S MY BOYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
“You’re Sasuke, right?” asked Yamato, as if Sasuke had not provided the memorable introduction of stabbing a seasoned ANBU in the shoulder as a sixteen-year-old during a dramatic reunion with his team
“It would be easier for us to keep things coordinated, if you sent us progress reports as you went...” Okay not to be that gal but I love that Tenzo and Kakashi are an “us” in this mini-lecture about how Sasuke should call his father (Kakashi) more often
P sure that’s Yamato’s last speaking role goodbye sweet man we knew ye well
“So does this mean that you trust me?” GO TO JAIL OROCHIMARU
Every time that Orochimaru touches Sasuke I want to leap through the screen you leave that boy alone!!! Go! To! Jail!
Sasuke having to explain his social life to Taka is a dynamic I never knew I needed. What more do I want from Naruto than frames like this:
"By showing everyone that Sasuke isn’t in the Hidden Leaf Village and that he’s still out journeying around the world, it reduces the possibility that the village will be harmed” “So are you saying that Sasuke has to keep travelling forever” “That might be so” I can’t believe the entirety of Taka came up with a better explanation for Sasuke staying outside Konoha than Kishimoto himself
“Compared to me, the likelihood that Kabuto will return to evil is extremely low”
He still helped kill......... 40,000 people????? Okay dude
I CAN’T BELIEVE OROCHIMARU IS ACKNOWLEDGING HE IS STILL EVIL!!!! GO TO JAIL!!
I’m gonna pretend I don’t see Tenzo following Stranger Danger and he’s on vacation on a beach where he belongs
Fhjkhfkjhfkj what’s the meaning of this Orochimaru you’ve looked the same since you were 25:
Sasuke: No. She’s older than I am
Orochimaru: [Soft gasp] What?
Man I remember vaguely Sasuke being involved in this fight based on the Tenzo novel scene later on but hoo boy I do not like this
SCREAMMMM TENZO TRYING TO PROTECT PPL IN THE AREA HE’S HELPING
“I can’t make direct contact with him, so I better go now” I hope it is because you filed a restraining order, Yamato
“To increase the rarity, what I’ve even done is, had all but one person in a clan killed” at this point En Oyashiro is just trying to bait Sasuke
God I love how righteous Sasuke is being rn like this is the kind of dismantling of oppression I wanted for him instead of sad murder times
This battle is bonkers:
Villain: Looks like you brought a sword to a dodgeball fight
Sasuke: Looks like you brought a dodgeball to a magic eyes fight!!
Well I certainly breezed past this part of Sasuke Shinden hello Fushin
I find it hard to believe that anyone but Naruto could best Sasuke rn
I keep joking that those eyes in the sky look like Tenzo but I’m right and I should say it
What a long, drawn-out and slightly suspicious backstory for Chino (looking at you, Fushin of two personality types)
“But now you’re still able to travel freely... and that is all because you have people who love and protect you” Team 7 cutaway with closeups of Sakura and Naruto, Narusasusaku game strong
“For the Leaf’s nourishment, your entire clan was absorbed by your village’s Roots” wow what a shitty time for such an excellent pun
Unbelievable kkhkjhfk and by this I mean completely believable:
Chino: Please explain your change of heart re: village corruption
Sasuke: I got a boyfriend
Unbelievable x2:
Chino: KILL ME
Sasuke: Consider this.... you have.... boy who is friend. Good enough
Chino: Wow Sasuke, you’re right
Lmao @ Kakashi proudly announcing that Sasuke is about to enter an unsanctioned jutsu fight in a bet to free enslaved people how did this letter go “Dear Hokage-dad-Kakashi, I am writing to inform you...”
Even funnier: If Tenzo wrote the letter bc Sasuke is shite at contacting people: “Dear Kakashi-senpai, Brace yourself to be worried and proud—”
“Are you Sasuke’s...” yes Chino, whatever the end of that sentence is, you’re correct
Huh I could’ve sworn at least a good chunk of these freed people go to the Leaf. I didn’t make that conversation up. I have discussed it many times!!! My poor Tenzo cut out for more logical story lines I guess
Omggggggg the Raikage is telling Sasuke about Naruto’s most vulnerable Sasuke moment..... the love!!! Is this the only reason they invited A lmao
En Oyashiro joining Rasa and Hiashi in the Bad Dad Club
I’ve said this before but Naruto and Sakura going on a date to talk about Sasuke is the most legit representation for their relationship I’ve ever seen that’s it that’s what them dating would be like
“You’re just like a one man police force” lol @ them cutting out the fact that Sakura said this bc Sakura’s not allowed to have individual connections to Sasuke and also just like....... how much Sasuke still wants to be a cop kjhgkjhgk baby stop
I’ve belatedly realized that Kakashi types to the beat of the intro music and it makes me giggle
“The adult world can be complicated” is that ur way of saying ‘nepotism’ Kakashi
“I’m startin’ to get a belly” “I don’t want to hear about all that” PLS
“You two are really the only ones who are special to me” aw Shikamaru
That slap was A Lot, Temari, surely there are better ways to tell Shikamaru you want him to be your boyfriend
“You don’t really think that Sai has—” “Well, he is very innocent.”
Kakashi about Sai: He’s the baby of the family
Sai: I’m the oldest and most experienced of all the youth???
Kakashi: I mark ur ages by when I got you xoxo ur legal age is 3
I’m not sure that that’s the intonation I expected for Hinoko but I guess that’s on me for stereotyping teen girls hahah
“That’s my ninja way” “Our ninja way” I feel like this is shinobi flirtation
The outro with Little Team 7 fading to Big Team 7... I have but one heart
Also the implication that they took a photo immediately post war jhgkjhgkj. Kakashi still has a barely healed stab wound and twenty years of trauma. Sasuke and Naruto both just lost an arm. Also who brought a camera to the battlefield. Who took this picture. (Tenzo waking up from a 224 episode coma: We gotta take a family photo)
“You might consider yourself a member of Team 7, but I wonder if they think the same of you” [Naruto voice] Believe it!!!!!!
“If we just kill the lookouts, it’ll be like easy to get past the checkpoint” okay calm down Soku
Lmao Shikamaru struggling to deal with rebellious teens jhghjkg why are the anime episodes I watch so fitting to my own life
Man not to get 2 real it’s fucked up that Soku fears peace wyd militarism
I don’t really believe that Soku is deserting the village but it’s a good tactic
[Panning to the bird scene at the beginning of this arc] We call that foreshadowing
Komori’s judgement seems to be clouded by his lowkey crush on Soku
“I’ve just been having these really bizarre dreams lately” that’s PTSD Shikamaru
“Feudal lords are always [tyrants] no matter where you go” then why.... do you have.... feudalism.......... [Tobirama screams in the afterlife]
Not to judge these guys so much but like.... ur ANBU and a veteran ninja surely you should have a disguise after faking your death??????? Kakashi, Iruka, what shinobi standards are you teaching exactly?? U didn’t even change ur hairstyles???
“Something similar happened to me as well” what are you... are you talking about when you pretended to be asleep during the Chunin exams because that’s not the same thing as sleeping under a pile of corpses Shikamaru
NOOOOOOOOOO SAI WHY ARE THEY HANGING MY ANGEL FROM A CRUCIFIX
AHHHHHHH I don’t like seeing Sai like this, Kakashi’s right he’s a baby!!
“Let’s just say I’ve found the place where I belong” Fhdjskhfksjhf this is definitely Root Code for something because Kakashi uses this line on Tenzo in his Tsukuyomi dream
“Then why didn’t Naruto come to get me? You and I have never been particularly close, so why were you the one who came here?” LMAO SAI ‘you’re not on my list of eligible rescuers Shikamaru 😒😒😒😒’
“Fret not, to me this is but a trifle” said Ro, lying prostrate on the ground in between groans of pain (same)
I mean... Gengo makes some pretty compelling arguments abt the shinobi system
“The alliance of nations that the Leaf is currently a part of... is only going to maintain a dark, tenuous peace” I mean... Gengo’s right even if he is a dick
“Lord Hokage told me everything... and I had a hell of a time getting it out of him too” “I don’t want to know what you did... I don’t even want to imagine it” JHGKJHGKJHG I WANNA SEE TEMARI INTERROGATING A FORMER ANBU, KAGE-LEVEL NINJA I LOVE IT
Wait are these last twelve outros dedicated to each of the rookie teams + Team Guy bc that would be adorable
JHGJHGGHGJHG DO WE ACTUALLY GET TO SEE TEMARI YELL AT KAKASHI
Update from 3 seconds later: We don’t but Kakashi’s “Euh?” sound as she knocks down his door is still very funny
“Friendship is useless” “If that’s true, then why are you crying right now” he’s been taking Sasuke lessons in his spare time
“Do you know of a man named ‘Zabuza Momochi’” !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
“These are my only friends” said Sai, about two giant cartoon lions
Sai’s genjutsu scene was actually much sweeter in the book bc Naruto, Sakura, Kakashi and Yamato’s chakra were all protecting him inside his own mind but I don’t mind my boy getting a hug
HAHAHAHAHA WHAT IS THIS CUTAWAY TO NARUTO BATHED IN GOLDEN LIGHT ANNOUNCING “RAMEN” LIKE IT’S A WHOLE SENTENCE OKAY STUDIO PIERROT U NEED A BREAK I GET IT
“What in the hell was that?” that was also my question Shikamaru
Shikamaru with full conviction: To be lazy.... that is my dream
Hahahaha it’s Ninja Teen Romance Hours I guess
“Oh, you don’t want to [go out on a date]?” No that’s not what I’m saying” [walks away] TEMARI PLS
“Going on a date without a strategy, would be like trying to fight a tailed beast unarmed” [Nodding] “You have zero chance of winning, that way” I suddenly understand Kakashi’s dating life a lot more
They really rely on you being aware of Naruto the Last huh gjkhgkjhgk there’s been no mention in any of this filler of Naruto and Hinata even being in a relationship to this point as far as I remember
Fhjkfhkjhfkfh poor Iruka none of the kids know he’s President of the Naruto’s Dad Society
“I know I’m supposed to be striving to get ahead in my career, but there’s also a part of me that really wants to just continue teaching kids, one on one” Irukaaaaa <3333333
Looool even as Hokage, Kakashi just drops out of nowhere to give cryptic life advice and then leaves
Smash the statue, Tsukune, don’t let the establishment tell u what to do!!
“Eating ramen everyday isn’t healthy you know” am I to believe that Kakashi, the man who told Naruto, ‘if you're going to be a ninja, you need to eat your vegetables’ is on a ramen-only diet?? Falsehoods
“And it’s all thanks to you Iruka” khjhgkjhgjhg alright.... you win this round KKIR shippers
WHO IS ANIMATING THIS SCENE IT IS BUCKWILD??? There is no character model to speak of, most of the kids don’t have noses, everyone’s upside down or spinning around, and Iruka is... hiding in a frog sign???
There is no English translation of this caption???? EXPLAIN JAPAN. TELL ME YOUR FROG SECRETS YOU KNOW I LOVE FROGS [INSERT PICTURE OF TENZO HERE]
(Update I looked it up in the sub and the caption offers no more insight. “IRUKA UMINO, AROUND 30 YEARS OLD. STEALTHILY”)
“This is for Hinata, so let’s all try our hardest” Kiba loves Hinata MOST
You know how if you pause in the middle of an animated action, you sometimes linger on an in-between image that looks goofy because it was meant to add to the motion rather than be focused on? This whole episode is animated like one of those images
It’s okay Lee the only dumbbell Naruto is fixated on is Sasuke Uchiha
I know don’t usually post so many images in these liveblogs, but I really need anyone reading this to see the Leaf Village’s semi-canonical Unofficial Mascot Konorin:
He is??? The love of my life???
“I don’t even have a boyfriend and train every day from morning til night” yes you do. His name is Neji Hyuga and he’s very alive and he’s a jonin sensei and he will buy you all the knives you want after he takes all of Hiashi’s money and redistributes it. In this essay I will—
You see what I mean??? Neji wants to be there for Tenten (and Lee)!!!
Tenten: What would Neji do if he were here now
Neji: [starts manifesting]
“It’s you since you’re a taijutsu specialist, but Naruto and Hinata aren’t” yes????? Hinata is???? She doesn’t use weapons but Gentle Fist is entirely taijutsu??? Why does everyone keep forgetting
KHKGJHKJHGKFHKJHFKJ I CAN’T GET OVER NEJI JUST. MANIFESTING ABOVE LEE’S BED TO GIVE HIM SHITTY WEDDING GIFT IDEAS
“And don’t forget: Hyuga” Neji........ what.... does this mean!!!!!!!!
Why say “Neji” like that Orochimaru and in fact why say anything at all [Konan voice] I’m the Hokage now, the entire criminal justice system is on its way you are going to jail!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I really can’t believe that the Naruto writers looked at Tenzo’s role in Naruto SD and decided “let’s do that.... but worse”
They animated?????????? A smaller Lee??????????? Into Lee’s mouth???????????? As if the animation style wasn’t enough. I need a minute
They are really going full Naruto SD huh??? Cut away skit like a ‘genjutsu’ scne. Lee and Guy playing a married couple and Tenten a baby. Neji in drag. This is a choice
“How can you misunderstand Neji so much” “Even if it’s only as a ghost, I’m sure that Neji would appear” I need. Several minutes
Fhjkhfkjfh Shikamaru’s vision of Gaara, Bee, Kakashi and Tsunade hanging out at this fancy restaurant. Is this who he thinks Kakashi’s social circle is these days (he might be right)
“Okay, I’ll hear you out!” Is this implication of this scene that Temari thinks Shikamaru’s idea of a first date is marriage... and she’s WILLING TO GO ALONG WITH THAT. TEMARI PLS
“Hey Ino, why would you go out of your way to make something I love? Bc she looooves you Sakura
“Sakura, I thought the same thing” GOD JUST GET MARRIED
“It’ll be too late once we go in, I could get all caught up in the mood or something like that” wait........ does Temari think Shikamaru wants to get married or fuck???? Or both??? OH MY GOD
Gaara: Naruto’s getting married.... without meeeeeeeeeee
God I love Gaara’s Blank Period hair it is truly careless and happy hair
“His ramen’s extravagent?” JKGHKHKJH everyone in the Leaf Village trying to convince Gaara that Naruto’s taste is incredibly obnoxious which is true but not in the way being described
Kankuro what’s your damage let Gaara buy a nice and personal present for the love of his life
Every time I think this arc can’t get more ridiculous it exceeds my expectations:
[Vaguely horrified accompanying dialogue: “The Raikage—” “—Will do the Hidden Cloud Dance?”]
“Well then, Gaara is just going to have to do the Hidden Sand Samba” Ah. Of course. The Hidden Sand Samba. Why didn’t anyone think of this plan before
Gaara is blushing because his new dream is just to samba dance with Naruto into the night
Ahhhhhhhhhhhh Teuchi giving Naruto an “all you can eat forever” coupon that’s cute our sweet boy is so loved
Gaara: My wedding gift to you, Naruto... is me :)
“I’m just disappointed that we aren’t going to get to see you dance, Gaara” you know what that’s fair Kankuro me too
Hahahaha Shino dissing Kiba’s plight for becoming Hokage to these random kids
I can’t pay attention to anything this ninja cat is saying because they’ve got Naruto’s voice and it is very distracting
There’s something to be curious about how it would be if Kiba married into a family that has a contract with the Uchiha lmao
Literally the girl who Kiba is supposed to be in love with is given Hinata’s voice #kibahinarights
“Oh, just take it. Money means nothing to me” the Beekeeper is truly one of the strangest characters in the Naruto universe just conceptually. Why are they wearing a giant bee stinger on their butt?
LMAO @ Kiba having absolutely no self-doubt whatsoever. Goals!!
Shino becoming a teacher after the war is actually one of the post-699 futures I like, good for him!
Iruka sweet man Naruto has compared you to a father like 1500 times have you not overheard him one (1) time
Kakashi is such a dumb stubborn bitch trying to find a way for Naruto to have a happy wedding... I love him
“This is my fault, I never taught him how to treat women! Not that I even really know about that kind of thing of course” Iruka Umino confirmed canonically gay
“I just have to bow my head a little” KKIR: 2; Me: 0
I love this tradition of Hokage boys bowing their heads for cooperation between villages yesssssssssssss
Outro for the whole OG Team 7.... I’m fine everything’s fine I’m good cool cool cool cool cool
The implication that they just sell Kakashi wigs in the village... amazing
I know this is about to be an emotionally poignant moment but what Naruto’s presence is reminding is that the only word he has said in the past 6 episodes is “ramen” LMAO
“I’m going to have to apologize to her for raising you as a such a thoughtless, inconsiderate man” raising you... RAISING YOU..................... TRULY PRESIDENT OF THE NARUTO’S DAD SOCIETY GOD BLESS IRUKA UMINO
LOOK AT THIS CRYBABY NINJA THIS IS WHAT I’M TALKING ABOUT ONE OF MY FAVOURITE PARTS OF KONOHA HIDEN WAS HOW IRUKA KEPT BURSTING INTO TEARS OVER NARUTO EVERY OTHER MINUTE THIS IS WHAT BONDS LOOK LIKE
God..................... the Team 7 lover in me just despairs of this final episode bc they’re all separated and also Tenzo needs justice 4 being Kakashi’s co-wedding planner it’s in the book I read it!!!!
I will set aside my feelings to recognize that Kakashi looks very handsome
Goodbye Naruto you were certainly an experience and I mean that in every possible intonation
#decided to watch the last animated season i'm truly done!!!#ayesha talks anime#ayesha liveblogs nahruto shipduden#liveblogging#naruto series#long post
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