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Ris!!!!! I've been catching up on the priest au thirst and i thought of eren from priest au and a drunk clingy mikasa stumbling into his office part of him would find it cute how she was clinging onto the point he couldn't even move giggling and asking him silly little questions like 'would you love me if i was a worm' with the cutest pout on her face her trying to kiss him and stuff but I also feel like he would get jealous cause no one except him alone gets to corrupt his sweet mikasa but he let it go for that night cause he has to take care of his baby but little does she know what he has planned for her the next day
omg drunk mikasa is so sweet. giddy after one glass too many of leftover homemade wine from a donation drive, cheeks warm and pink, a toothy grin on her face. it makes eren realise she doesn’t smile as much as she deserves, and it brings a pang of regret in his chest. if he hadn’t brought her to this town, if he hadn’t ever met her, would her life have turned out differently? would she have smiled more?
in his office, she’s on her knees because he’s asked her to be. or rather he’d only said it once, a small slip of tongue and honesty, when he’d admitted: you look nice like that, pretty on your knees. if he’d been looser lipped he would’ve also said: … with your small mouth wet and pink like a little kitten. but he hadn’t, and she hadn’t known just how depraved it really got inside his dark place, so he kept coming back, kept kneeling by his side, kept saying ‘father’ in that soft, raspy voice of hers that haunted him at night. today she is less restrained, and rests her cheek on his thigh, right above her knee, more intimate than he ever allows, more affectionate than she thinks she is probably allowed to be with her priest.
“i didn’t know you had to do so much paperwork as a priest.” her voice sounds dreamy, the slightest slur around the edge. eren suppresses the urge to pinch her cheek. “what exactly did you think a priest had to do,” he asks, a fond smile on his lips.
she lets out a long hum. “i don’t know. help people. talk to them. tell them how to be good. teach them how to be loved by god. look pretty in your priest dress, i guess.”
eren’s pen stills, ink blotting against paper. his throat suddenly feels dry. licking his lower lip, he says slowly. “everyone is loved by ymir, mikasa. you know that.” and then, as if the words are too heavy to speak, almost stumbling, he asks, “so you think i’m pretty?”
she giggles, sounding so beautifully childish, for a second he doesn’t know what to do with himself. “father eren is the prettiest priest, in his pretty priest dress. all the girls think so.” the edges of her voice turn bitter, and it hangs in the air until she covers her mouth with her hand with a little slap, suddenly realising what she’s saying. she turns to look at him with puppy eyes and wine flushed cheeks. “but they must have told you already, haven’t they? all the things they think about you. i’m not the only one.”
he wonders then what goes on in her little head. if she thinks he talks to other girls the way he does to her, if she thinks people confess things the way she does to him. if he “teaches” them how to repent in the way he does to her. even though he is barely touching her know, it makes him feel full to the brim with guilt and something worse: a cagey, fledgling beast made of anger that wonders why she has so easily accepted that he has any kind of relationship with others, a calm knowledge that if she had even a hint of anything with anyone else he would destroy it, a sick urge to hold her face in one hand and taste her wine-slick tongue. maybe he could chastise her for drinking too much, stroke her cheek softly and tell her that if there really was a god out there, there’s no way she wouldn’t love her. how could anyone not love her. on most days he feels utterly defeated by the impossibility of it.
“think only of yourself, mikasa,” he says, hating himself for it as soon as he says it. he could’ve said anything— that there really is nobody else, no one talks to him the way she does, nobody trusts him the way she does, even if they did, he wouldn’t abuse their trust the way he does to her. “ultimately, there are no secrets between you and god. everything that goes on in here...,” he taps a finger on her head and strokes it down to her cheek, fighting desperately not to bend down and kiss her. (he could do it, he thinks. she might not even remember. why suddenly is her inebriation a moral cock blocker when his position of power never managed to have that same effect?) his voice feels hoarse as she looks up at him, chin tilting upwards in the sweetest gesture of obedience. no one has ever touched her like this, he thinks. not in the innocent way it might have seemed just now, and definitely not in the terrible ways he has touched her when he made her confess every brief fantasy she might have entertained, only to enact something ten times more depraved. it makes him feel like a bad man, but at the same time, this is probably the closest to god he has ever felt in his life.
eren has drifted off into thoughts filled with guilt and longing but mikasa is still looking at him with reverence, hanging on to his unfinished sentence like it is something holy. her eyes are cloudy grey and not as transparent as he would like. he likes it better when she is sober, when her thoughts are not the slightest bit fuzzy, but full of him and tinged with shame- shame for the desire she feels for him. he lets the edge of his index finger brush against her lip, lets himself bend and whisper over the shell of her ear. "everything little thought you have is ultimately naked in front of ymir."
@annluvazzel you have resurrected the brainrot!!
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Hey Buck can you tell me a joke?
#anonymous puzzler answers#anonymous puzzler art#anonymous puzzler originals#villain coded comic#man who i genuinely don't know if he knows any jokes & definitely doesn't know how to hold casual conversation with strangers
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how do you enjoy floor time? sitting, laying, etc
#answered#anonymous#sitting on the floor leaning against my perfectly good sofa like a small macaque#I think I'd greatly enjoy having tatami floors if that was an option#also big fan of conversation pits#if I had a home with a conversation pit I'd be a happy camper#get in the padded floor hole
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The livejournal kink memes were FILLED with requests for Vulpes and to this day I’ll never get it
Though that might be cause I always kill him in the first encounter but who knows
SDAKWLDKA i mean. i KIND OF get it, on one hand he's VERY confident in his ability to kill you, and it's this whole power trip thing the first time you're supposed to meet him so it's like
but on the other hand it's also like
(sorry about the similarities to @somethingaboutmint's post full disclosure i've been rotating "he doesn't even bark" in my head like a rotisserie chicken)
#fallout#fallout new vegas#fnv#vulpes inculta#courier six#shoutout and big thank you to somethingaboutmint i will forever drop 'he doesnt even bark' without context into my daily conversations#every time i meet him i always want to kill him but im underlevelled and get mowed instantly#oc: eli#doodly thingy#asks#anonymous#fallout tag
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I can't stop rewatching your clips of Xiao during the Lantern Rite, like Xiao is me during Asian family gatherings and dinner parties. I just sit quietly trying to mind my own business and not draw attention to myself but someone goes and points me out anyway to get me involved in the chatter and I'm just awkwardly sitting there like "Uhhhhh what is socializing???"
it's definitely something Hu Tao would do (and did) and everyone else has their own ways to keep him engaged in the social circle. it's part of opening himself up to the world after all!
but breaking out of the hermit habit is hard, Xiao really has not much of an idea than how he usually speaks his mind of toward others as himself rather than a guardian yaksha adeptus. or what he's thinking at the moment, putting him on the spot 100% of the time.
#he eats for the first time in three centuries to keep himself off the conversation because you do not interrupt someone who's eating#which is one of many things he learned on the spot now used and later failing thanks traveler. social cues are not his thing ever#theres a difference between not caring and not knowing how Being A Person works and xiao is failing both#qiiasks#anonymous#xiao#genshin impact#qiiarts
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Hi🌹Would you write a few Chrollo crumbs, please?
warnings for yandere themes, somewhat macabre discussions because being around chrollo makes you lose it
"If you got stabbed, would it hurt?"
"Hm? Pardon?"
"I think we've established that you don't experience pain like most people," you take a sip of your favorite specialty drink through a straw. Paper, for the turtles, naturally. Except for when it inevitably becomes soggy in ten minutes. Then the turtles have to fend for themselves, environment be damned. "I've never heard you say so much as an 'ouch'. So, I got to thinking."
Chrollo swirls his own drink — red wine, or so he claims, his paleness raises suspicion — contemplating the matter because you raised it.
"My perception of pain is still intact, it just doesn't bother me as much as it would the average person."
"That's the thing, though. Have you been stabbed?"
"You seem charmed by the idea."
"Admittedly, it is a nice idea. But, hey, no deflection," you frown. Then, you reiterate your previous inquiry, heavily emphasizing each word. "Have you been stabbed?"
"If you must know, then yes, I was stabbed once, many years ago."
"And? Did it hurt?"
"It wasn't pleasant."
"Oh, please, you don't have anything to prove here," you roll your eyes. He's got to be acting obtuse on purpose.
"My memory of it isn't the best, I was a child," he explains. There's an odd gleam to his eyes when you stiffen, like a cat waiting to pounce on an object that's been taunting it. "You're very sweet, dear, worrying like that for my younger self's sake. Don't let it distract you, finish your point."
"It's not called being sweet, it's called having basic empathy."
"I'll have to take your word on that. Go on, then. I'm curious to know where you were going with this."
"A hypothesis. Let me stab you and tell me if it hurts."
He raises an eyebrow. "Do you think you're capable of committing such an act of violence?"
"Do you think I could?"
"... In a situation that induces fight-or-flight, maybe," he muses. What a strange thing to fondly muse over. "Though, speaking from experience, you're more inclined to freeze than follow through with the other two options."
You utilize all your willpower not to say some very unkind words. "Hence the experiment. If you're so confident, then let's put it to the test."
Chrollo hums, as if actually considering your idea. "It's an interesting pitch, but I'm afraid I'll have to decline. This is such a nice shirt and bloodstains are a pain to get out."
"That's the best excuse you have? Just take it off and—"
The self-satisfied expression he gives is enough to make your tongue freeze.
"And...? Oh? There's more? I like this dominant side of you, don't stop on account of me. Keep listing your demands."
Your paper straw starts crumpling over, as does your posture. "You... you ruined it. You somehow twisted a nice idea into a revolting one."
"Twisted, you say," he murmurs, a hand on his chin. "Like a knife?"
"Ugh, forget it! I don't want to think about it anymore."
#chrollo and his darling have very interesting conversations#yandere chrollo x reader#chrollo brainrot#answered#Anonymous
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To me, reading classics is less about checking off some specific to do list and more just participating in a conversation that's been going on for as long as humans have been telling stories. And I don't necessarily love every classic, but I do love a lot of things that reference them and it's wonderful to be able to follow your favorite author's line of thinking, or understand the allusions in other media (music, film, etc.). Like Paradise Lost is misogynistic slog half the time, but it formed a lot of our modern conceptions of the devil and you can see it running through a lot of Neil Gaiman's work (and many others). Or a happier example I got to enjoy both Sophocles' plays as well as all the references to Oedipus Rex in The Unbearable Lightness of Being, doubling the enjoyment of both. Some people might similarly enjoy starting from their favorite authors and reading the works that influenced them, and following the long threads of conversation back as far as they please, if they're considering reading more classics.
This is exactly how I feel too, anon, you encapsulated it perfectly! I think the less dogmatic we are about the fixed boundaries (or fixed presumptions) of some genres the better and the more open and freeing our reading becomes!
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i just wanted to scream here for no reason... or have a meaningful conversation about existential dread
ah I can definitely provide a place for you to scream for no reason
for the meaningful conversation about existential dread you’ll have to go to my brother tho.
he’s the one who wrote a song called “god is dead, I am dead, and so are you”, not me lmao
#an unreleased song so i’m not exposing myself lmao#but yeah i’m not the person for such conversations#i’m of the mindset of ‘I just don’t think about it’ lol#ask#the hellsite answers#anonymous#hellsite hall of fame curator’s bullshit#hellsite hall of fame curators bullshit
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🍄🍄🍄 :3
⇢ share a head canon for one of your favourite ships or pairings
both Pete and Vegas have separation anxiety. for Vegas it's about the anxiety that Pete is going to leave and not come back and he gets really frustrated with himself about it because it's a problem and he needs to be chill about Pete going off to do other things that aren't just about him (tall order).
meanwhile, for Pete it's about Vegas dying when he's not looking. after all, he's already almost failed to keep him alive once and it would be too easy for him to actually fail at it a second time. if he's not looking at Vegas then Vegas is a little bit Schrodinger's Vegas.
anyway this means they're both very weird about it when they're not in the same place and get substantially more comfortable when they are. Vegas thinks that this is a problem more than Pete does; as far as Pete is concerned Vegas thinks a lot of things are a problem that don't have to be, but that's also Pete's coping mechanism and he'll be damned if anyone gets to take it away from him.
#conversating#anonymous#vegaspete#vegas theerapanyakul#pete saengtham#kinnporsche the series#aggressively headcanons#lise memes
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What’s do u think of friends with benefits EreMika? They both think the other wants no strings attached and keep denying their feelings despite the chemistry and jealousy (and poor Armin is just there like… Besties please just be hOnest)
I wonder if armin would be devious enough to try something to rile them up 😈😈 like ask Mikasa out as a plus one to one of his phd social events. Maybe drop some vague comments to Eren, like, “well I’d always wanted someone like her to accompany me to these events. You know, someone smart.”
“You’ve thought of about taking her out before?”
“I mean,” Armin shrugs, “I’ve always thought she was pretty.”
All the while knowing perfectly well how crazy this makes Eren. 🤭 Mikasa has no idea, she thinks she’s just going with him as a friend (which is true). Makes fun of him when he stares at the small blonde girl in his undergraduate class a bit too long.
Mikasa probably goes home to Eren, anyway, thinking they could probably have a good fuck before bed, but Eren’s agitated as shit and a little bit drunk, throwing one too many mean comments her way.
“Did you have a good time, Mikasa?”
“Well the food was quite average. There was ice cream though. You know how I feel about ice cream.”
“Right, of course. That’s why you went. For the ice cream.”
She looks at him, confused. “No that’s not why I went to this. Obviously I went for Armin. I wouldn’t spend an hour getting ready just for kwality walls ice cream.” She’s taking her clothes off already. “It would have to be Häagen-Dazs at minimum.”
He’s distracted the entire time he fucks her, agitated and upset about something she can’t tell what, but it’s hard to think about when he slings his leg over her shoulder and fucks her so hard she can’t really think about anything at all. After he’s made her cum twice, and he’s still fired up, eyes wild with something she doesn’t understand, he says, “Clung to his arm all evening, but still came back to me didn’tcha? He doesn’t make you feel like this.” He reaches down to rub at her overstimulated clit, pulling out a choked sob from her lips. “He never will.”
The words feel distant as he pants it against her neck, breath wet and hot against her skin. But after he pulls out and spills all over her back, the words linger, seeping into her stream of consciousness slowly.
Eren pulls at some tissues, wiping her back gingerly, strangely quiet. “Sorry if I was too rough with you,” he says thickly.
As he’s about to turn and head to the bathroom to wash up, she pulls on his wrist, turning him back to face her. “What’s going on?”
“Nothing.”
“Eren,” she says, trying to be gentle. “You’re always rough with me. And you never apologise for it.”
“Well here’s your damn apology, sorry if it’s a few months too late.”
Mikasa is unprepared for the anger that clouds his features. “I don’t need an apology, Eren. I like it. You like it. I thought we knew that already.”
He turns away, irritated. “What’s going on with you?”
“What’s going on with me?”
“Yes! Why are you behaving like a fucking asshole literally two minutes after being inside of me?? And you know what, while we’re at it, what the fuck were you saying back there? Who doesn’t make me feel like this?”
“Forget it, Mikasa—“
“No, I won’t. You know I’m not sleeping with else. That’s what we agreed—“
“You went to a fucking gala with him, for fuck’s sake. As his date—“
“As a plus one—“
“You never go anywhere with me. Just sneak into my room after midnight and into my bed. Guess that’s all I’m good for, huh?”
Mikasa’s eyes widen. The room is deadly silent. “Are you using me, Mikasa? Is that it?”
Shaking, she murmurs. “Are you hearing yourself, Eren—“
“Answer the question.”
Mikasa scrambles for her clothes, sick of this entire scene. She’d stomped over her own heart for months, telling herself it didn’t matter if her own feelings got caught up in this, Eren wasn’t looking for anything serious. This was a nice thing. She didn’t want to ruin it.
And now here he is accusing her of using him??
“And now you’re leaving. Classic—“
“You never ASK ME TO GO ANYWHERE! He did! And as a friend, if you ever bothered to ask for the details.”
“Right.” He sneers. “And you would come with me if I asked you—“
“I WOULD,” she yells. “And I know it’s shocking because you’re a dick, but I would go anywhere you ask me to, if you’d just fucking ask. But you never do.”
She lets that hang in the air, cheeks hot with her confession, eyes filled with unshed angry tears.
Eren’s gaze softens, his brows furrow, he looks at her confused. “You would?”
She nods, half dressed, half insane because she didn’t know why this even came up. But the way he looked at her right now made her feel something fuzzy in her chest, something like hope.
“Im an idiot,” Eren murmurs, sounding a little bit awestruck.
“You are,” Mikasa confirms, sounding mostly relieved that they aren’t yelling at each other anymore.
He looks at her sheepishly. “Don’t put your clothes on, Mikasa. Please.”
“Are you fucking for real, Eren?”
“I want to hear you say that again. That you’ll go anywhere I ask you to.” He crowds her against the wall, his nose nudging hers playfully. “But when you’re not angry with me.”
“Maybe if you ask me out properly I might consider it.”
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whats the point of the porn bots] all they do is follow me then never respond when i message hi :(
Maybe they just don't like you, I've had conversations with bots before
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About the accents: if someone has a very "proper" Italian they are either foreigners or politicians/dignitaries/etc. So that fits perfectly for Machete, but I think it would be so funny if he sometimes slipped up and used a Nepalese word bc he forgot one in "proper" Italian lol
(Funny to me cause Naples has its own language in addition to accent, and most people don't actually know those words)
.
#ah that's good to hear!#glad it fits him#there's no way he gets it perfect every time#especially in the absence of widely used standardized Italian in the original canon era#there's bound to be a mix up every now and then#I don't know how likely it would be that he absorbed much Venetian at the time he lived there#I remember reading that lectures in medieval and early premodern universities were held in Latin but I could be wrong#even though his original native language is Sicilian I think he has probably lost a lot if not most of it due to lack of use#but it would be kind of funny if the Neapolitan and/or Sicilian influences resurfaced occasionally in private casual conversations#and Vasco who to my knowledge has never been to the south would be left guessing what he was even trying to say#I'm taking the easy way out and lowering their language barriers a bit out of convenience bear with me#I'm not competent enough to deal with all the different languages and dialects and the communication issues that would come with them#answered#anonymous#sorry to point out an obvious typo but I think you must've gotten Neapolitan/Napolese autocorrected to Nepalese by accident or something#unless Machete has secret ties to Nepali that I'm not aware of#which would be quite a twist
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What are some of smunker’s favorite fits? :-)
im gonna add a few more after i eat dinner but here's what i have so far, of clothes in My Actual current rotation !
#skunk mail#Anonymous#a doodley#no sir not getting out of this [big comfy black pants]#the white shoes are actually cheap knock offs i found so i dont use em if im gonna actually walk a lot#bc they hurt me...#its either white shoes or black converse or these retro rainbow converse i have ^_^#or the white and rainbow pride vans but those hurt my heels a lot even with protection#im trying to save up to buy another pair of shoece ^_^
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holds out my hands.... bitty latte and bitty ink
its literally only you and me that ship them
we are the captains
IT'S THEM!!!!!! OH MY GODDD ahem ahem im normal @monster-kind
#robanilla-arts#my art#i love them your honor#rob answers#anonymous#ink sans#latte (ccino sans)#latte x ink#magic bitty bits (tm)#bitty bones#latte is not canon to mbbtm BUT we got to chatting and I have. so. many. thoughts about bitty latte......#latte has a huge memory spike and Ink purposefully doesn't help him#ink also distracts Classic (Latte's main ally) which is a very round about way of allowing Latte to remember more#Latte confronts Ink about this and Ink is unapologetic. he essentially says “oh heyyyy wait- you make way more sense now!”#“You're monster-kind's boy aintcha? I know you! hahah.....” and then infodumps on latte and they have a whole chat#that brings them closer than ever#(ink forgets most of this conversation and Latte was never meant to remember any of it because it was off-script from the beginning)#heheheh. uhm. mbbtm lore i guess. look man I'll get to it 😭😭 I have full intentions of finishing this story#i can't stop fuckin THINKING OF IT
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Consider: Arthur keeping his word about making peace with the Druids (*side-eyes BBC*) and the next time they come across one of those small shrines, he's a lil uncomfy still but is doing his best like, "what's this one for? Should we go around or...?" Because this one isn't as subtly creepy as the last one, there are no "def haunted" vibes, it's just a kind of rough cairn of stacked stone and branches, and it's got flowers all over it, candle stubs and incense sticks, little jars of honeycomb, sweetmeats, preserves, etc.
And it's Percival (hc he was raised in a Druid camp, even if he doesn't have magic) is like, "No, it's fine, this one is for Emrys."
Cue Arthur asking about Emrys, and Percival explaining he's supposedly the living son of the Triple Goddess, born to heal the wounds of the Old Religion (he's tactful enough to not mention who made those wounds *coughcough*kingcunt*cough*) and the offerings are made to show kindness and peace, and to aid him in his duty (sure enough, those flowers and herbs are all medicinal).
"Why's it so important to keep him happy?" It's Gwaine who asks, irreverent and curious.
And Percival tells them the story of the High Priestess Nimueh, who tried to turn her power against Emrys's through the magic of life and death. So Emrys created a great storm over the Isle of the Blessed and called down the wrath of rain and lightning to unmake her.
They're all so absorbed in storytelling that nobody notices Merlin sitting off to the side and sweating like a hooker talking to a beat cop.
-
Bonus points if Merlin sneaks over to take some of the offerings, against his better judgement bc he should not be encouraging this but he's got a killer sweet tooth and nobody in Camelot can make decent sweetmeats, apparently, and some of these herbs are pretty rare.
Double bonus if Percival or Elyan sees him do it and are like, "bro you gon be so cursed," and Merlin doesn't know how to explain that no he's not sacrilegious, these are for him, they're offerings, they were offered, and not entirely realising he's being paid the magical equivalent of ye olde protection racket.
*also side-eyes bbc* yeah...this would have been awesome to have...excuse me while i go sharpen my knives, completely unrelated to this ask i assure you
#(at bbc) hey why the FUCK did you leave an opportunity like this open??? 🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪#bbc i just wanna talk#hey i just want to have a conversation 🔪 nothing bad 🔪 i swear#your honor you can vouch for me right 🔪 ....that's what i thought#bbc merlin#i am 100% on board with this#elyan being extra vigilant with merlin bc he was possessed before and doesn't wish such a thing to befall his dear friend#merlin: emrys won't mind#elyan: emrys burned a fucking priestess to the ground for challenging him#merlin: well...she asked for it#elyan: merlin that's not helping your case!#merlin emrys#i feel like it's through percival's explanation through the shrine is when the knights learn how much of a cryptid emrys is#yeah yeah i'm going with that#sir percival#knights of the round table#Anonymous#asks#ask
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Are we ever going to see Bill talking to Iris ever again? Has he lost some significant interest in her by now?
Eventually, although I don't yet know to what extent. At bare minimum, she shows up again late, but I'd like to work her in again earlier if I can.
I've got a joke I'd like to do where she goes "hey 😘 wanna fool around," Bill goes "I really shouldn't, I can't afford to lose an eyeball. ... well, maybe if we stop at making out," he does NOT stop at making out, Bill runs to the bathroom to wash out his eye yelling at himself for giving into temptation that easily and he canNOT do that again, he's DECIDED, that was the LAST TIME, it's NEVER GONNA HAPPEN AGAIN, and he comes out of the bathroom and Iris goes "hey 😘" and he does the exact same thing all over again.
however, as i approach the part of the fic where bill actually finally gets some goddamn action, I'm still feeling out just how overt I want to be with it. "Bill let his ex-gf nut in his face. twice." might be over the line. I'll decide that once i figure out where the line is.
There's not really interest to lose? He's never seriously considered her a potential romantic partner. They had a friends with benefits arrangement. He sees her as a fun enough person to periodically hang out with and a wildly, insanely hot sexual partner. If he saw her again, he'd still consider her fun and insanely hot because she still has the same personality and the same body. If they didn't see each other for 500 years he'd still be dtf next time they meet.
#anonymous#ask#about my writing#bill goldilocks cipher#(It's amazing how this answer nearly sounds like a normal conversation about a normal pairing.)#(and not like we're talking about an eyeball with bat wings and a floating triangle with an oculolinctus kink.)
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