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ichijager13 · 1 year

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Teach me how to be loved

Chapter VIII

Are you gonna tell me now? Are you gonna tell me later

Pairing : Eren Jäger x reader

Characters: Eren Jäger, Annie Leonhart, Pieck Finger.

Tags: Unhealthy coping mechanism, unhealthy relationships, childhood trauma, physical and verbal abuse, self-esteem and trust issues, domestic violence, implied/ referenced cheating, and a touch of sweet, lovable, and non fuckboy Eren Jäger

This fic is brought to you by Lana Del Rey’s songs

Masterlist, AO3, Playlists: Reader’s POV, Eren’s POV

A/N:Please read the content warning before starting to read my work.

Likes and reblogs are more than appreciated

Have a nice day/evening

The next morning, Eren was still asleep when your eyes fluttered open. Recalling you didn’t have dinner last night; you carried your sleepy self to the kitchen. Looking for ingredients to make breakfast, you stood in front of the fridge scanning its content when you heard footsteps rushing to the kitchen.

“Vatty”. A voice called from the hallway. “Oma hat Apfelkuchen gemacht. (Grandma made an apple pie)”. The voice sang. Confused, you closed the fridge. In front of you stood a young girl.

Frozen, you stood there, as a pair of familiar teal green stared back at you. you felt steam coming out of your ears the second you realized you were dressed in only your panties and a loose shirt that barely covered your ass.

“Sophie”. Another voice called causing your eyes to widen in horror. “Da bist du ja. Wievielmal… (There you are. How many times…)”. The middle-aged woman stopped mid-sentence when she spotted you.

Unaware of what was happening in his kitchen, Eren quickly stepped into a pair of fresh underwear before leaving his bedroom. “For a split second, I thought you ran away again”. He joked coming into the kitchen, only to be greeted by the sight of the three of you staring awkwardly at each other.

Seeing her son’s face fall, Carla had a hard time holding her laughter. “Mom, what…”. He started before he glanced at your fidgeted figure next to the fridge and then at his daughter.

“Vatty, wer ist sie? (Who is she?)”. Sophie whined wrapping her arms around Eren’s leg.

You don’t speak German but you knew what the word vatty means, this girl was his daughter, Eren was married, and you slept with a married man. A feeling of disgust overwhelmed you when the realization hit you.

“Und warum bist du nackt. (And why are you naked)”. She added nose scrunched.

The little girl had a bandage above her eyebrow. That’s why he left in a hurry the other day, you mused.

Still in shock, Eren looked down at the four-year-old brunette. “She’s… she’s a…”. He threw looks Carla’s way. With pleading eyes, he silently sought help. “She’s a friend of mine”. He stumbled over his words.

Enjoying the situation, Carla pressed her fist to her mouth in an attempt to hide the obvious smirk adorning her face.

Sophie’s gasp caught everyone’s attention. “Vatty, what happened to your back?” She asked her father suspiciously. Hearing her words, you wished the earth could swallow you right here and now.

“Sophie, mein maus. Vatty has important things to do”. Carla who decided this was enough embracement for her son, finally spoke. “How about we leave him the cake we made and come back later”. She winked at her son.

“Aber ich will bei ihm bleiben, es ist sein freier Tag. (But I wanna stay with him, it’s his day off)”. she frowned, crossing her arms upset.

“There, there Schatz”. Carla cooed holding the brunette in her arms. “Now let’s say auf wiedersehen to vatty. We will come back later, Ich verspreche. (I promise)”. Defeated, Sophie stopped squirming before throwing looks your way. “Gut gemacht. (Well done)”. Carla spoke in a hushed tone to the tall green-eyed man, laughing when his ears became redder. “Have a nice day”. She sang offering you a bright smile you failed to return.

“Sie ist schön. (She’s beautiful)”. Eren heard his daughter saying.

“Ja, ist sie. (Yes, she is)”. Carla replied.

“Aber nicht so hübsch wie ich. (But not as pretty as me)”. Eren chocked hearing her words. “richtige Oma? (Right, grandma?)”. the sound of his mother’s laughter before she closed the door behind them made him cringe.

“Good morning”. he spoke awkwardly heading your way.

“I’m leaving”. You hissed finally recovering from your state of stupor.

“Wait, what, no, wait, it’s not what you think”.

You crossed your arms giving him a side look. “She literally called you father. I don’t know what’s ambiguous about it”.

His shoulders dropped in defeat. “Yes, Sophie is my daughter”. He knew this was going to be hard but he was willing to try and explain things to you.

“And she saw a half-naked stranger in her kitchen with her half-assed-naked father”. You glanced back at him. “Naked father, I mean”.

“I’m wearing briefs”. He pointed out.

“It doesn’t matter”. You shouted. “What do you think crossed her mind when she saw this?” you pointed at yourself. “Her father with another woman in their house, a half-naked one with a bedhead, I should precise”. You slammed your hands against the countertop. “I know men are trash, but this, you… you are above all of my expectations”. You gritted. “I bet this isn’t even your main residence, that somewhere in the suburbs you have a family house with a wife waiting for her beloved husband to come home”. If eyes could kill, Eren would be six feet underground by now. “What did you tell her this time, huh? You are out of town? You didn’t leave work early so you’ll spend the night here? Or…”. He shut you up with a kiss. “Get away from me”. you shoved him.

“Then let me explain myself”. He let his arms land on the small of your back. “I’ll kiss you again if you don’t let me speak”. He threatened. “She thinks you’re beautiful but not as beautiful as her”. He baited his lips to hold back his laughter remembering his daughter’s words. “Your bedhead is cute, the “men are trash” part hurts, a lot. You’re right this isn’t the main residence and I do have a house in a residential area but”. He rose a finger stopping your unformed protests. “I don’t live there, not anymore. This is where I spend most of my days. No, I don’t have a wife waiting for me”. he followed; arms still looped around you. “She passed away four years ago while giving birth to that wonderful little thing who stormed in here half an hour ago. Now my mother, the woman you saw minutes earlier, lives there with Sophie, my daughter”. He topped the explanation with one of his stupid bright smiles that makes you want to squish his cheeks and kiss him. “Can I kiss you now?” he tilted his head.

“So, I didn’t sleep with a married man?” You whispered looking down.

“You slept with a widower”. He corrected. “May I?” He asked again, your noses were touching. After what felt like an eternity to Eren, your lips finally met.

“How come Annie never mentioned you have a kid”. You mused while cutting fruits to decorate the crepes you made.

“I guess she either assumed I have already told you or that we will never see each other again”. He winced when you slapped his hand when he stole some of the strawberries you chopped.

“And why you never told me?” you threw him a questioning look. “Do you have whipped cream?”

“You always run away and you never asked”. he pointed out opening the fridge. “Here”.

“Thanks”.

“I know nothing about you either”. He propped his head on your shoulder.

“You never asked and I always run away”. You replied. “Besides, there’s nothing interesting about me”.

He scoffed. “Is this some femme fatale technic?” He moved his lips from behind your ear to your nape, leaving soft pecks behind him.

“No, just the plain truth”. You glared at him when he attempted to steal some chocolate chunks. “How about you set the table?” your lips brushed when you turned your head.

“Ay, ay captain”. Not wanting to encourage him, you stifled your laugh. “All I know is that you work at Arlet & CO, that you’re good at drawing, and that you love reading”. He stated. “A design engineer, since you went to Wolfsburg”. He followed setting two dishes and two glasses on the kitchen table.

“Elementary, my dear Watson”. You replied, sprinkling toppings on the crepes. “What toppings do you love? I’m doing strawberries and wiped cream for myself”.

“Blueberries, please”. He handed you a box of powdered sugar. “Plus, some of this on top, please”. You took the box from him and resumed work. “You said you know Annie from six years ago, you’re not from here?”

“I moved to this town after graduation. I was born and grew up in Saint Paul, a small town in Nebraska”. You cleaned the countertop and placed Eren’s crepes in front of him. “I went to Rhode Island School of Design where I had my master's in industrial design”. You added taking place at the table. “I got there thanks to a scholarship, anything else?”

“These are delicious”. He hummed taking another bite. “Who taught you how to cook?”

“I learned by myself thanks to cookbooks”. You answered. “What about you?”

“Impressive”. He breathed. “I was born and grew up here in Newark. Mikasa, my deceased wife, and I met Armin and became friends with him when I was six. I went to MIT, majored in mechanical engineering, got married at the age of 29, and had Sophie a year later. I worked at different facilities of Volkswagen before joining the R&D department in Allendale shortly after I got married. And I have been named the head of that facility months ago”. He handed you his dish after he finished. “Can I have another one, with strawberries this time please”.

“You worked only at Volkswagen?” you asked making him another one.

“Yes, I was hired right after I graduated. Thank you”. he smiled before taking a bite. “Why industrial design?”

“Because I love drawing and I’m good at it. plus, the college offers a scholarship and the job pays well. Why mechanical engineering?”

“When we were young, Armin and I tried to build a plan”. A breathy chuckle left his chest. “And we did it, but it broke down to pieces before it even left the ground. I bawled my eyes out that night. The next morning, we promised each other to become engineers and build solid motors”. He locked gaze with you. “I got accepted in MIT and a year later he got a scholarship to Georgia Tech”.

After breakfast, you did the dishes together, got dressed, and left the apartment. Him, to see his daughter and you back to your empty, cold, and lonely house.

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sabraeal · 3 years

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In Plain Sight, Chapter 4

Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3

Written for @k-itsmaywriting‘s birthday! I hope that, despite how weird the world is right now, you have an amazing day!

Shirayuki understands how this is supposed to work. She’s seem movies after all-- Witness, of course; Sister Act 1 & 2, if only because Opa thought Whoopie Goldberg was a national treasure and Oma thought she was too young to be watching Ghost; and Our Lips Are Sealed about eight times on video cassette, since she’s old enough (and Opa resisted DVD long enough) have both VCRs and wholesome Olsen twins content as a part of her childhood.

(Her favorite formative twins were Annie and Hallie from The Parent Trap; they were red-headed, just like her, and one of them had a British accent. She’d been devastated to find out that not only were both of them American, but they were also only one girl. She’d watched Double Trouble to console herself)

In any case, she knows how this goes, at least narratively. She lays down in this amazingly comfortable bed, stares up at the ceiling in a tense yet melancholy fashion for hours, and dreams in plot-relevant flashbacks. Extra points if they reference the crime she witnessed.

The problem is: she didn’t. She’s just the unfortunate collateral to her father’s personal redemption. All the life ruining without ever being part of the A plot.

There’s an upside though: the second she hits that firm cloud of a mattress, she’s out like a light.

Absolutely nothing wakes her, but Shirayuki jolts into consciousness anyway, as unpleasant as any false start. She expects to be confused; she’s not a graceful riser to begin with, and every morning in temporary housing, she’d bounce off three walls at minimum trying to find a bathroom that didn’t exist.

(Well, the bathroom did exist, it just didn’t exist where it should, which was down the hall to the right, and was compounded by the door being in exactly the wrong place too.)

Instead, she knows exactly where she is. Knowledge which is quickly followed by the low-key, seething resentment for the man who put her here.

She groans, lifting her head from the pillow. It’s fine. She’s fine. It’s just--

7:00, her alarm clock says. Tuesday, her brain provides after a long moment.

She should be getting up, habit told her. Getting her morning fix of avocado toast and orange juice with Paul Newman’s face stamped on it.

There’s worse ways to start your day than having a fine pair of eyes smiling at you, Oma would say.

What can I say? Opa’d grumble back, flipping through the paper. It’s impossible to compete with Butch Cassidy.

Her fingers curl into the sheets. There’d be none of that today. Agent Jiang-- Obi’s assistant had gotten her Simply Orange instead. A small mercy. It’s hard enough to be someone else when there’s still so much her clinging to the edges.

It’s tempting to linger in bed; she’s always been a morning person, up with the birds, but maybe Claire isn’t. Maybe Claire likes to stay up late and sleep in, sleeping past the three alarms she sets for herself. Maybe she likes to have waffles for breakfast, straight from a box, and drinks pomegranate juice. Maybe she doesn’t bike into the lab at eight because--

She groans. Because Claire doesn’t have a job. A thing that will have to change soon, since Claire has to pay for this house.

There’s a great deal of compromise that happens between bedside and bathroom; habit insists she needs to be fully dressed, ready to greet the day, but everything else--

Well, she’s not going anywhere is she? There’s no reason she couldn’t wallow in her pj’s all day

Standards, habit insists. But those belonged to Shirayuki, not Claire. Claire has no job, no friends, and nothing to do on a Tuesday morning besides--

Oh no, the recycling.

The bin is nearly two-thirds her height, but with only one day under her belt, it’s already overflowing. Good thing she’d looked at that brochure when it slipped out from between the takeout menus.

She shrugs her hoodie a little tighter, pulling it down over her leggings-- habit and hedonism settled on exercise wear as a happy medium-- and grips the handle, tugging it out the opening garage door, right into the fresh Texas morning--

And promptly throws her hoodie back into the garage. She might need that with the downright frosty temperature the house is set to, but oh, she was not going to cover her skin out here any more than necessary. Even now, she’s starting to sweat in impossible places beneath her leggings.

Hooking her palm back around the handle, she tugs the bin down the drive. Her gaze fixes to the pavement-- the last thing she needs is to trip right over herself on her own driveway taking out the trash-- and she doesn’t look up until she hits the sidewalk. It’s a struggle to get it to sit right-- these are proper curbs, white poured cement with squared edges meant to puncture cheeky tires; one of the wheels catches in a gap and refuses to budge until she hip checks it out onto the next slab.

She’s damp at this point, skin dewing with giant drops of sweat she’s tempted to shake off like a dog, but--

But Martha Kino has an arm slung along their fence, holding a tall glass of iced tea that makes her mouth water just to look at.

“Oh, um, good morning!” she calls out with a weak wave. “I didn’t, um, see you there.”

It’s only when Martha slides her gaze to her that she realizes her neighbor hadn’t been looking at her at all. Her mouth curves into a knowing smile at the sight of her. “Good morning, honey. You here for the show?”

Shirayuki blinks. “The show?”

“Mm-hm.” Martha takes a long drag from her straw, ice clinking against the glass. “Here it comes now.”

Shirayuki tracks her line of sight right across the cul-de-sac, squinting at half acre of immaculately trimmed, completely invasive Bermuda grass. Their front garden is well-kept, as well; thickly mulched with giant hibiscus blooming blood red against pristine stone facade.

Oh, and there’s a man as well. That’s probably what Mrs Kino is looking at.

He’s tall. No, tall is an understatement; he’s a giant, six foot four at least with shoulders to match. He’s trimmed with the same military precision as his lawn, clean shaven with an undercut that could scratch glass. Heavy brows draw sharply over his nose, forehead rumpling as he tears a box right down the fold--

Ah, well, all right. It’s not doing much of anything for her, but the Vitruvian man’s more ideal cousin ripping up boxes definitely counts as a show. Halfway through, he grabs the hem of his shirt, mopping his brow, and ah, hm, he could definitely have made money as an anatomical model. His rectus abdominis are, ah...very defined.

“Is he--” Shirayuki searches for the words-- “from around here?”

“Oh, him?” Martha’s gaze doesn’t stray for a second, not even as she sips at her tea. “That’s Scott. Aspen’s husband. They just moved in a few weeks ago.”

Shirayuki glances around the neighborhood. Seems like more than a few of her neighbors hope they’ll never leave either.

“Quite the pair, those two,” Martha hums. “She’ll be at the luncheon. I know you two will just get on like houses.”

More like houses on fire if she mentions she’s seen her husband’s floor show. “Oh, right. The um, luncheon.”

Mrs Kino grins as Scott hops back inside, out of this heat, just like she’s dying to do. “By the way, he mows the lawn on Sunday, just before lunch.”

“Oh, um, great.” She’ll be sure to miss it. “Can’t wait.”

It’s too early to bake cookies.

There’s not a baked good on earth that tastes as good two days later as it does fresh out of the oven; Shirayuki knows that down to her toes and bones, but still--

Stress baking. It’s a thing. And she doesn’t have to make anything right now. She could get all the ingredients together, just to make sure she has them. And then...just not do anything.

She can. Definitely. Absolutely. She’s Claire now. Claire probably doesn’t even like chocolate chip cookies.

Oh gosh, who is she kidding? Only monsters don’t like chocolate chip cookies. What next, Claire doesn’t like brownies? Apple pie? Snickerdoodles?

It’s a slippery slope, not liking things. Best to just keep it simple and eat everything, that’s what Opa always said at the church potluck.

The morsels and brown sugar already sit out on the counter when her phone lets out a piercing ting. She’s half tempted to ignore it; she’s having a contentious battle with the ten pounds of King Arthur flour that’s tucked away in her cabinet-- what was she thinking?-- and she refuses to show any fear in the face of baking supplies but--

Ting. No one knows her number. Well, no one except the government.She settles back on her heels with a sneeze. The government probably doesn’t take kindly to being left on read.

Her hands clap against her thighs, flour misting into the air as she leaves two partial prints right over the helical print. She frowns, plucking at the fabric, nose wrinkling as more powder burst into the air. Ting.

“I’m coming,” she mutters, stumbling over to the island. “I’m coming.”

Sugar Daddy i got just what u need pumpkin check ur email

The corners of her mouth dig furrows into her cheeks as she clicks on the notification. It’s the only message in her inbox, aside from the ubiquitous Welcome to Gmail spam and a few coupons for Banana Republic and a couple of other retailers. They’d taught her about this at orientation; they couldn’t do much about an empty inbox, but everyone had at least a few mailing lists they’d either forgotten to opt out of or regularly used.

Still...what about her said Banana Republic? She glances down at her spandex-clad legs. If they were going to go for a too-expensive clothing line, they could have at least sprung for Lululemon.

Ah, but that wasn’t the point. Marshal Jiang-- Obi hadn’t texted all...that...to show off some spam. Sitting at the very top of her inbox is a Cornell email address-- Cornell-- with an attachment.

Dear Claire, the message reads, We’re so sorry to see you go, but I’m glad we’re able to keep in touch. Of course we kept the copy of your old CV. Good luck to you in all your endeavors.

It’s signed by some professor; not high profile enough for her to have heard of, but she doesn’t doubt that he’s real, someone a curious party could look up on Cornell’s directory. Well, at least for the next six months.

The Columbia alumna inside her writhes in agony. Cornell. She doubts it’s a coincidence.

Me Aren’t you supposed to be taking care of me?

Not that she’s very, um, up on the specifics of such a relationship, but she’d been under the impression that sugar...children?...were supposed to be fully reliant on their sugar parent. Her mouth pulls thin. Already she’s thinking about this far more than she’d ever hope to.

Sugar Daddy a good daddy makes sure his baby can take care of herself ;)

This declaration is followed by a stream of emojis, ending with an eggplant and a peach, and she just-- doesn’t need to know. She wipes away the sweat that beads at her hairline-- from embarrassment, of course-- and downloads the attachment.

Me I’ll take a look. Thank you.

She sets the phone back on the island, face down, and glares. He can’t possibly be like this to everyone. People would complain. They wouldn’t just let him insinuate that he-- that they--

Ting.

Sugar Daddy good girl

All right. Maybe they would.

Shirayuki doesn't get homesick.

She’d been the first brownie to leap out of her car at summer camp; Opa barely had time to lurch into park before she was traipsing across the field, backpack slung over her shoulder and duffel bag dragging on the grass. Freshman year, she moved into the dorm by herself, pressing kisses to wrinkled cheeks as she lugged her suitcases onto the train; she’d almost forgotten to wave from the window.

But as soon as she lays down in bed, the lights snuffed out and the world still, it hits her. Just a soft roll of her stomach at first, the barest itch on her skin, like wearing a wool sweater on a spring afternoon. It’s fine; too much to ignore but nothing that would keep her up too long.

It doesn’t stay that way.

Her stomach clenches, tears pricking at her eyes, and it’s everything she can do to just roll onto her side, letting the chills wrack through her body. She shivers so hard her teeth chatter, and this-- this isn’t the gentle ache of nostalgia her books prepared her for. This is an illness, plain and simple, like when she caught norovirus in eighth grade can could hardly do anything but lay on the bathroom floor and wait for the next wave to begin.

This isn’t her, she isn’t like this, she doesn’t get like this, but-- but--

Before she always knew her home was waiting for her; she could leave but Oma and Opa would always keep the front lamp on, waiting for weary travelers and last minute bookings.

It’s different now that there’s no home to come back to.

7:00, her alarm clock says. She watches it tick over, like she has for every hour before it.

She must have slept at some point; it’s impossible that she’s lain awake, staring at the clock for eight hours. But that doesn’t make her any less tired, and so when her alarm starts up, beeps cutting through the quiet white noise of the air conditioner, she reaches out and slaps it off.

Shirayuki may not sleep in, but Claire is certainly warming to the idea.

Her notebook sits open on the island; neat, looping script stretches across the page, straining the boundaries of the blue lines that contains it. She’d done her homework yesterday, combing through job sites to find the most likely candidates. There’s five on her list right now, ranked according to preference, and oh, is Shirayuki glad she had the gumption to do this before, because this morning she feels like roadkill being scraped off the blacktop.

Still, she worries at her lip as her laptop boots up, peering over her list. In the cold light of the morning, five seems too few, but...desperation hasn’t set in yet. She’s allowed to still have standards.

Wrapping her hands around her mug, she glances at the next page: another list. No, a set of instructions. Edit CV. Write cover letters.

Shirayuki groans. Even with the bullet points she left for herself, composing cover letters is a circle of hell all its own. With only three hours of solid sleep under her belt, it’s an insurmountable hurdle to getting hired.

“Right,” she murmurs, hooking an ankle around a stool and pulling it under her. “Editing it is.”

She clicks on the pdf Obi sent her, scrolling down and--

“Oh no.” She rears back from the screen, heart pounding. “No, no. There’s got to be a mistake...”

“Hey, baby,” Obi’s voice rumbles through her speaker. It’s thick and warm and would be utterly distracting if she were in any less of a crisis. “A little early for a b--?”

“What happened to my papers?”

“Uh.” All the suggestion in his tone evaporates. “What?”

“My papers.” Her hand grips the phone so tight it creaks. “They’re gone.”

His end goes silent. Silent enough to make that weird click, like the line’s cut out, and she pulls back to check--

“Someone stole your passport?” He laughs, incredulous. “Some sort of luck you have, Miss. Barely had it for a day and already you’ve gotten your identity stolen.”

She blinks into the barren air of her kitchen. “What?”

“You know,” he hums, too amused, “I picked out a cute house in the suburbs for safety, and here you are, getting robbed. Did you leave them in your car? Or did you just go out--”

“N-no!” She’s honestly half tempted to say what car, until she remembers the tasteful mid-sized SUV in the driveway, the one she’s still been calling the girlfriend car in her head, and realizes-- it’s hers. She’s the girlfriend.

Except she’s not. At all. Which is fine! She doesn’t even want that! If she’s still thinking about what his mouth feels like as he wraps them around his words, then--

She really can’t be thinking about this right now. “I mean my papers! I just looked at my CV and it’s a page!”

He hesitates, though not enough for the line to click again. “Isn’t that long enough?”

“CVs aren’t resumes,” she informs him patiently, pen twisting between her fingers. “They’re dick measuring contests--”

Her teeth snap around the words, but oh, it’s too late. They’re already out there in the aether, and he’s laughing.

“Now there’s something I didn’t think I’d hear out of you, Miss.” He doesn’t need to sound so pleased about it.

“It’s something my old PI used to say,” she mutters. Oh, Garak would be so proud of herself if she knew. “It’s not very polite, but she’s not, um, wrong.”

“I’m sorry the US government made you under endowed.” His words practically rattle as he says them. “It’s not the size that matters, Miss, but how you use it.”

“Obi,” she huffs. “All the work I’ve done for the past ten years of my life now is attributed to my birth name and my birth name only! According to this CV I have the same level of experience, but less papers than an undergrad! And you can’t tell me that any of these are searchable on PubMed.”

And none of them are first authors, is what she doesn’t say. It’s a petty thing to worry about when her entire academic career is functionally extinct.

“Hm.” His fingers drum quickly on a table. Desk? It’s strange not knowing anything about the man who is her only lifeline. “I’ll look into it.”

“I don’t want to be, um, alarmist, but I can’t get a job with this.” Her hand shakes as she scrolls down her screen. “No one is going to hire a post-doc with a one page CV.”

“Don’t worry, Miss. There’s a plan for this, somewhere.” She can feel his grin when he says, “You can’t be the first academic who’s had to go into hiding.”

She smiles, despite herself. “Considering some of the conferences I’ve been to, I can believe it.”

“Besides, you could always apply to pharmaceuticals.” The very word is like a donkey kick to her gut. “The pay’s supposed to be better--”

“I can’t work for Big Pharma.”

He hesitates. “You...can’t?”

“Obi, they make little old grandmas pay eight hundred dollars for insulin!” She presses a hand to her chest. “Banting and Best didn’t sell the patent for one dollar so that people could get gouged by--”

“I get it, I get it,” he assured her. “Preaching to the choir. But as a safety, I’m sure you could find one that isn’t stealing candy from babies.”

She huffs. “I doubt it.”

He rasps out a laugh. “I’ll see what I can do. As I said, can’t be the first PhD on the lam.”

Her mouth twitches. “Just yours?”

“You are certainly some kind of education, Miss.” He hums. “Give me a day. See what I can turn up.”

“You have two,” she informs him magnanimously. “I have the luncheon tomorrow.”

“Oh, right.” She doesn’t need to see him to know he’s lounging, smug like a cat post-canary. “Looking forward to joining the neighborhood’s Ladies’ Committee?”

“Ha ha,” she drawls flatly. “Very funny.”

He is unnervingly silent on the other end.

“You’re kidding, right?” Her voice certainly does not fill with a nervous quaver. “You guys don’t have things like that around here.”

Obi hums, humoring her.

“W-what would they even do?” She picks nervously at the sticker on her laptop, prying up part of NVIDIA. “Plan potlucks? Organize the Neighborhood Watch? Cotillions?”

She doesn’t know how he makes his grin so palpable over 4G. “Looking forward to your debut, Miss?”

Shirayuki scowls down at her screen. “I think I’m firmly up on the shelf, thank you. Now if you don’t mind, I have cookies to make.”

#obiyuki #akagami no shirayukihime #snow white with the red hair #my fic #witness protection au #ans #i wanted SO BADLY to get to the ladies lunch this chapter #but a lot of the lead up in here got too long #and in the interest in cutting it at a place that made sense #it all got moved one chapter over #BUT it is almost to where the true conceit of this fic arrives #always a nice place to be

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graveyarddirtseries · 3 years

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Graveyard Dirt & Salt

Chapter Nine

From out of the tall, un-managed grass of the laid waste cotton field they were riding in, a ghost, a sort of shadow rose up, then another and another. Three of them, blood on their faces from a fresh kill, eyes wide at the approach of another meal.

“You're gonna grow roots sitting there.”

For six days Annie had seated herself right in front of the wrought iron gate and stubbornly refused to move. For six days she screamed whenever someone would try to move her. Sure she came to eat when food was ready and certainly she made a trip to the hastily constructed privy when she had to and she slept in her bed, or rather laid there all night until her rage wore her out and she fell asleep.

But when she wasn't eating, shitting or sleeping, she was sitting in the same ass groove worn into the grass and sullenly staring out at the world beyond the gate.

Easing down beside her, the Lieutenant peered down the same worn cattle trail she was peering down and sighed.

“You know where Halloween pumpkins come from?” He asked the girl.

She seemed to ignore him.

“They used to be turnips, you know. Was a fellow named Stingy Jack, you know him?”

Again Annie seemed to ignore him.

“Well, anyways this man was a rotten sort, used to play all kinds of tricks and schemes, loved to drink. Anyways, one night Jack is at the bar, drinking and he runs out of money. Well, old Jack he wasn't ready to turn in, but at that moment the Devil comes by, checking up on the sinners at the bar and old Jack says to him 'I'd sell my soul for one last drink'.

The Devil thinks this is an easy one and turns himself into a sixpence – do you know what a sixpence is?”

Annie shrugged.

“It's like money from England...well, I think this story is Irish, but...do you know where Ireland is?”

Annie was still.

“Well, anyways, the Devil turns himself into a coin for Jack to buy his last drink with, but old Jack is a wily sort of old bugger, so he buys his drink and then steals back the Devil coin and shoves it into his wallet next to a silver cross he had been carrying, trapping the Devil in his wallet.

The Devil cried out 'let me out, let me out!' And Jack said he would if the Devil promised not to return to claim his soul for ten years.

Well, ten years pass and Jack is out walking on a dirt road one night and the Devil comes up to collect what's owed.

And old Jack says, 'I'll go, but first you have to get me an apple from that there tree'.

The Devil huffed and stomped his hoof, but figured it was easier that fighting old Jack, so he hops up into the tree to get Jack an apple.

As soon as the Devil is in that tree, Jack takes out his pocketknife and carves crosses all around the trunk of the tree, once more trapping the Devil.

'Let me down, let me down!' Shouts the Devil.

'I will, but you got to promise that you won't take my soul from me until I die of old age', says Jack.

The Devil, getting irritated at this point, huffs and agrees.

Well, some years later, old Stingy Jack dies and he gets to the gates of Heaven and Saint Peter says, 'no, can't come in, Jack. You were mean and drunk, and you cheated and you tricked people. You can't come in.'

So old Jack goes down to Hell to see if he can get in there. It's cold and lonely wandering the earth as a spirit and Hell is very warm.

Well, the Devil himself comes to the gates of Hell and he says 'no. I don't want you here, Jack. You're mean and spiteful and too tricky for even Hell.'

Old Stingy Jack considers this and finally asks the Devil, 'well, what do I do then?'

And the Devil says, 'you go back where you came from and you walk the earth'. And he throws an eternally burning ember from the fires of hell at Stingy Jack.

And old Jack he puts that ember in a hollowed out turnip he had in his pocket and he walked the earth. They say to this day old Jack is out there, tricky and sly, wandering the earth with his Jack O'Lantern.”

Annie sniffed to hide a small grin that was threatening to break on her face.

“Benny's like Jack,” she whispered.

“He sure is and he will always trick the Devil.”

Annie gazed back out at the cattle trail, her big, dark eyes taking in the world beyond the gate like a raven perched on the branch of a tree.

“When will this all be over?” She asked him.

The Lieutenant was startled. He thought maybe Annie knew that this was how things were now, but then again she was just a wee thing. Small and young.

“Oh, sweet pea, this is how things are now. There is no over.”

She was quiet, soaking in this information, before she said, “I just want to go home.”

“Where's home?” He asked.

Annie frowned, her face still.

Somewhere outside the wall a bobwhite warbled it's funny little shriek.

The child beside him stood up and took a small step towards the gate.

“I'd stay away from the gate, sweet pea,” the Lieutenant warned her, also getting to his feet.

Again the bobwhite shrieked and Annie hurried to the wrought iron, pressing herself against it to peer out. She tweeted back, a sweet little trill that the Lieutenant couldn't place.

From out of the bush lining the cattle trail, Benny emerged, still dressed in the cassock and grinning, hands up so Sister Dymphna on the wall wouldn't shoot him.

“Good morning,” he greeted casually.

“No shame in coming back defeated,” the Lieutenant teased cautiously, mildly panicked that the man had returned so quickly. Had he been forced to give up their position? Was he compromised?

“Hey, Cordelia,” Benny greeted the child at the gate, reaching through to tickle her cheek.

She pulled away quickly, angry at him for leaving her.

Catching Sister Dymphna who was descending from the wall to open the gate, the Lieutenant held her off from her task for a moment.

“Why are you back?” He asked the shorter man.

“Well, I scrubbed the mission, but...I brought gifts.” Benny explained.

“Guns?” The Lieutenant asked.

Benny grinned. “Sort of. Just...take it easy, okay?”

“Alright.”

“Okay, it's clear, come out!” Benny shouted over his shoulder.

The Lieutenant dropped his shoulder enough so he could slide his rifle off if he needed, as out of the woods came nine people, all of them with their hands up. He still instinctively dropped his shoulder further, preparing for trouble.

“Who are these people?” He hissed at Benny.

“They're friends.”

“You brought people back to the convent?!” The Lieutenant snarled. “You compro-”

“Calm down,” Benny said. “I wouldn't endanger Cordy. She's the only one I like. These people and us have one thing in common. We want this woman stealing group dead. Now let us in.”

The Lieutenant held Dymphna back again, putting her behind him, where Annie was being shoved too.

“I ran across them in the middle of gunning down a group of these men who were trying to steal a couple of their women,” Benny explained. “Let us in. Please? We need to talk.”

“They leave their weapons outside the gate.” The Lieutenant bartered.

“Sorry, but no.” One of them said. He had a voice like the thick black smoke of a forest fire, the kind with embers and a danger.

Studying his marine gear, the Lieutenant asked, “are you a fan or a real marine?”

“Corporal Angel Delgado, I was posted at HQ, I know of you, Lieutenant Vancoughnett.”

“Delgado?” The Lieutenant racked his brain, there were enough marines at HQ that he could only catch the taste at the tip of his tongue on who the man was.

“Hey, Cajun,” Benny said firmly. “Look at me.”

The Lieutenant looked over at the fancy man.

“Trust me, okay? You want these people inside.”

“It's not my convent,” he finally said.

“I'll get Mother Mena,” Dymphna offered, she tried to take Annie with her, but the girl collapsed on the ground in non-violent protest, becoming dead weight.

Benny chuckled. “I taught her that.”

The Lieutenant remained quiet, taking in everything he could of the group of people behind Benny. Delgado was a marine, so he assumed the woman to his right was as well. There three other women, four men. They didn't look very threatening, they looked tired and hungry and two of them had instruments strapped to their backs.

Mena sidled up beside him, as quiet as a kitty cat and eyed them for a moment, before saying, “welcome. You can come on in. But this is a place of peace, please be mindful of that. Dymphna, please get the gate.”

As the gate was opened, Benny strode inside, the others following him slowly. As they passed the Lieutenant, one of them, a young man with dark hair sort of puffed up his chest at him with a smug grin and kept walking. The two with the instruments brought up the rear, both of them tipping their hats to him politely.

The Lieutenant made sure the gate was locked and secured, and Dymphna was back on the wall, before he followed the group, heading for the church Annie sullenly walking beside him.

Inside the church, he took a seat in the back with Annie, feeling like it wasn't his rodeo anymore. The convent was Mena's, the group was Benny's, he was just muscle, he supposed.

Benny, ascending the pulpit, grinned down at the others. “Good morning,” he said like a priest preparing to begin his sermon, and as he was dressed, the Lieutenant almost could forget the purpose of them being there. “Alright, let's get into it. Abbess, I missed you. You look cute in that yellow blouse, did the Lieutenant find it for you?”

“The point, please, Mr. Malone?” She insisted.

“Long story short, these people are in need of shelter, a home. In return they've agreed to help us find these men who have been stealing women. And they've already given us a peace offering.”

“Which is?” The Lieutenant asked.

“We have a prisoner, tied up in an upstairs closet in the farmhouse nearby, he can give us what we need to get these men. The position of their camp.”

“Are you seriously having a fucking meeting without me?” Grayson burst into the church, along with several of the nuns.

“That was faster than I hoped,” Benny murmured. “Hey, Grayson, I see you're still alive.”

“Fuck you, Benny!” Grayson shouted, storming down the aisle.

As he passed by the young, dark haired man from the new group, the other young man reached out and grabbed Grayson by the back of his shirt, yanking him down hard and holding him there.

“Shut your face, you're in a church, dipshit,” the dark haired man ordered. “Go on, Father.”

Not quite liking this man pushing around Grayson, the Lieutenant stood up and moved to rescue the boy, taking him back to sit at his side.

“Go on, Benny,” he said.

“Well, that's pretty much it. We have a good chance to get back Haley, Laila, maybe any other woman who've been taken by these men and in exchange, the nuns get some company here at the convent. More guns, more people.”

“Less food,” Mena added calmly. When everyone turned to look at her, she stood up almost meekly and made her way to the pulpit, crossing herself quickly before Jesus, before moving to stand beside Benny. “Less space. I certainly hope your friends are willing to work.”

“We won't freeload,” Delgado assured her. “These walls look nice enough to keep us invested in the place.”

“I'm saying,” Mena continued, “we of course will provide shelter and aid, but if we want to winter in contentment, we'll need to bring back more food to supplement our garden and our coop.”

“If one of the new group can help me hunt,” the Lieutenant began, “we can dry some meat for the winter months.”

“Yo!” The dark haired young man said.

“You can't hunt, Kane!” The young man with the glasses who sat beside him said.

“Can you, Auggie? No? Then shut the fuck up.” Kane said.

“Greene and I can help hunt,” Delgado said.

“Well, protein is a good start, but we'll need vegetables, fruit. Our peach tree does what it can, but it won't see us all through the winter.”

“We can find farms that have trees and visit them come harvest time,” the Lieutenant offered. “And any canned food we come across will be brought back to the convent.”

“You sound like you're in, Cajun,” Benny said.

“I have to admit, I'm attracted to the idea of more capable guns around here, but...no offence, I know nothing of these new folk.”

“We know nothing of you either, Lieutenant,” Delgado said.

“Whatever happened to jarhead brotherhood?” Benny asked.

“Well,” Mena broke in. “If we can all manage to get along, then I have no problems with newcomers. But I have a few rules we need to keep to here. This is Holy Ground, my nuns won't be assaulted or have vulgar language or actions taken upon them. I won't expect you all to tend to mass, but you're welcome if you want. Please respect that this is a convent first and foremost.”

“Jesus,” one of the woman from the new group murmured.

“Guess that'll put a stop to your weekend catting, huh Saph?” Kane teased.

“Keep your head straight,” the woman named Saph warned him archly.

Mena waited for them to calm down, before saying, “well, if we can oblige each other's rules, then I don't see why we can't provide sanctuary. We'll celebrate our union tonight with a meet and greet of sorts.”

“A meet and greet?” Delgado asked, his tone was a little more accusatory. These new people were decidedly rougher around the edges than the Lieutenant and the nuns were, it was clear.

Mena sort of shifted nervously under his dark eyed gaze. “Uh...well, I don't...I'm not sure what to call it in the end of days. I'm sorry.”

“No, I – I wasn't being mocking, I'm sorry...we've been in a completely different land than you. It'll take a while to get civilized again.” Delgado said hurriedly, sounding almost embarrassed. “I think a small...thing might be good to mingle our group with yours. Get everyone accustomed to each other.”

Mena nodded. “Alright, then. Now, do any of you need medical treatment or...I see you're pregnant, darling. Do you need prenatal care?”

“I've got my vitamins,” the pregnant woman said. “Thank you.”

“Our people are in good shape, Medicine Man Jack keeps us running,” Delgado said. “We just need some sleep somewhere safe. And food would be wonderful. But don't think we're planning on just sitting around, we will work for that food. We'll chip in on chores.”

“You have a doctor among you?” Mena asked.

“Forensic Pathologist, actually, Jack was in the army as a surgeon too, so he's good at wear and tear fixes. Nothing major, so I hope no one needs brain surgery or open heart.”

“Maybe he wouldn't mind working with our Sisters Mary Monica and Mary Claire, they both have some nursing and hospice training, I'm sure they could benefit from more training.”

The man with the wide brimmed, black hat nodded his agreement. He wouldn't have been the one the Lieutenant would have guessed to be the doctor among the group. Especially with the banjo on his back and the almost Amish fashion he wore on his slender frame.

“Why don't you introduce yourselves, Corporal? So we know who we're bringing in to our flock?”

“Pfft,” Kane – the dark haired young man exhaled.

“We...uh...have pressing matters, another time maybe,” Benny interrupted, motioning to the Lieutenant to join them as he hopped down from the pulpit, heading for the door.

“I will not be blown off, Mr. Malone,” Mena argued, following him down the aisle, everyone, literally the entire two groups, following as well.

In the rush of the crowd, the Lieutenant scooped up Annie, who was still sulking, but allowed herself to be carried instead of getting crushed. He didn't like how fast it was all moving, not that he wasn't used to fast paced, only that he was still a little shaky on his trust with these new people.

Grabbing hold of Dymphna just outside, he eased Annie down and whispered, “keep your eye on these people while we're gone, yeah?”

She nodded.

“And tell the others to keep their weapons on them, they don't have to be menacing, just...cautious.”

Again she nodded. “Will we be okay?”

“I'm eighty percent.”

“Eighty percent yes or no?” She called after him as he hurried to catch up with Benny and Delgado at the gate.

He side eyed a few of Delgado's people, who were milling around awkwardly nearby, as he passed.

Mena joined them just as the Lieutenant did and the four of them stood for a moment at the gate.

“Where are you going?” Benny asked her.

“With you.”

“Not outside the walls, Sister.”

“It's Abbess, please? And I have just as much right to be in on all of this as you, since you decided to start playing fast and loose with our convent supplies. No offence,” she added to Delgado sweetly.

“A little taken, but I get the frustration.” He replied.

“No.” Benny insisted.

“I'm not even going to talk to you anymore,” Mena stated, frustrated.

“Get your weapon, yeah?” The Lieutenant told her. “We'll wait.”

Mena narrowed her eyes at him.

“I promise. We'll wait,” he assured her, grabbing Benny by the hem of his cassock.

As Mena scurried off, Benny yanked his cassock hem back and said, “she can't come. Absolutely not.”

“Why?”

“Because I promised to let this asshole go if he told us everything, so we're going to just let him walk then shoot him dead.”

The Lieutenant glanced in Mena's direction. “Well, shit. We can't leave without her now, she'll kick us all out.”

“Why does she want to come anyways? Have you been letting these nuns loose?” Benny demanded.

“They're free to come and go as they like and...yeah a few of them have been coming with me on hunts and such, I thought it would be best to get them used to the outside world.” The Lieutenant said. “And what the fuck does it matter to you? They need to toughen up.”

Benny nodded angrily, agreeing with him, but clearly not liking it. “Fuck...shit. Yeah they do.”

“What do we do then?” Delgado asked.

The Lieutenant exhaled, he didn't know. This was Benny's fucking mess.

“Okay, we get the information from him, I walk off with him into the woods and strangle the fucker.” Benny said, removing his cassock, possibly to prevent anyone from catching him by the hem again.

“Or,” Delgado added calmly, “we just interrogate him in a room away from her. Shoot him and say he lunged us.”

“That's easier. That'll work.” Benny said, suddenly snapping at the Lieutenant. “Why are you looking at me with a face like a slapped ass?!”

“I'm not,” he argued lightly.

He was, but he wanted to argue a bit. It was an entirely different plan set in motion now. Not a bad plan, just an entirely different one. And, yeah, maybe he hated that it wasn't his plan. Maybe he was a little pissed that it was the fancy man who saved the day for once.

Instead, he turned to Delgado, who was gazing at him with calm, almost thoughtful brown eyes.

“Are your people gonna be okay here on their own?” He asked.

The Corporal nodded. “They're adults.”

“That pregnant one looks young,” the Lieutenant said.

“Hazel, yeah she's our youngest, sixteen. She's a good kid though, quiet and doesn't complain.”

“Who's the father?” The Lieutenant went on with his interrogation dressed up as concern.

Delgado eyed him calmly, before saying, “no one in our group, if that's what you're thinking.”

Mena returned, her giant kitchen knife in hand, empty rucksack on her back. “Ready,” she said.

“Stick close,” the Lieutenant said to her. “Remember what I told you.”

She nodded.

“It's kind of neat, we have three horses stashed in the barn to take back to the convent and everything,” Benny said as they entered a bedroom at the top of the stairs in the farmhouse.

“These men have hor-” The Lieutenant stopped short as a moan came from the closet.

All four of them stopped in their tracks and just stared at the white door.

The moan came again and it wasn't human. Still the four of them just sort of stared in disbelief at the door.

“Hey, dipshit!” Benny finally shouted at the door, kicking it lightly.

The door shuddered in response as the man on the other side threw himself at it, letting loose another familiar moan.

“Shit,” Benny swore, stepping back, circling in a quick pacing motion, before stopping.

Delgado placed his hand on his hip. “He's dead.”

“Fuck!” Benny swore louder.

The door rattled again.

“I knew we should have gotten the information out of him last night!” Benny yelled. “But you wanted to wait!” He pointed at Delgado. “Now that asshole is fucking undead from a stomach wound and we just lost our lead!”

The Corporal blinked at him. “You asked me to offer up my people to fight for you. I wasn't going to do so on blind faith. Sorry, Abbess,” he added kindly to Mena.

She reached out and touched his forearm warmly.

Kicking in the door, slamming it into the uggie on the other side, Benny leapt on top of it and beat it with his fist for a good long time, before pulling out his pistol and shooting him until the clip clicked empty.

Everyone was quiet, their ears ringing in the small room from the shots.

Mena, who had covered her ears at the sight of the gun, lower her hands and looked panicked at the Lieutenant.

“I'm sorry,” Benny apologized, standing up, much calmer than he had been, running a hand through his hair and putting the greasy strands back in place. “That was unfair of me to blame you, Corporal.”

“It's fine,” Delgado said. “But we'd better get moving, those shots will have gotten us some attention.”

“Let's the horses and get the fuck back,” Benny said softly, almost as though he were ashamed of himself or the situation.

The Lieutenant actually felt bad for the man. He was just after these men because they posed a threat to the survivors of the area, namely his nuns, but Benny had lost someone to them. Benny didn't seem the type to make honest-to-god connections with people, so it seemed like when he did, he was attached for life.

He clapped Benny on the back as they left the room, trying to comfort the poor man.

Benny was quiet, but didn't shove his comforting gesture away, just sort of slumped his way down the hall.

“Ever been on a horse, Abbess?” Delgado asked as they saddled the creatures as quickly as they could.

Mena shook her head. “No.”

“Me neither,” he said. “Guess we'll both learn something new today.”

“Cajun?” Benny asked. “You ride?”

“Never.”

“Fucking Cajuns,” Benny replied, swinging up onto his horse easily. “Just like riding a bike.”

“These bikes bite, don't they?” The Lieutenant asked, eyeing his horse warily.

Benny's horse whinnied and side stepped in agitation at the new, unfamiliar rider and Benny almost fell off.

Laughing, the Lieutenant attempted to copy Benny's movements up and into the saddle, adjusting himself down below to a comfortable position, before turning to offer a hand to Mena.

She was already being hefted onto Delgado's horse by the Corporal, sitting in front of him, holding the horn nervously. So he instead pulled Marie off his shoulder and holstered her into the fancy rifle holster attached to the saddlebag.

“Alright, little kick to get them going,” Benny instructed. “Pull this way to go this way, pull this way to go that way, pull both back to stop. If your horse gets spooked, it's probably because of a snake or the undead, hold on like hell and they'll get you away to safety, but they may buck and if that happens? Eight seconds.” He added with a grin at his own joke. “Yup!” He nudged his horse into a trot, out of the barn.

“Fucking Texian,” the Lieutenant cursed, nudging his own horse to follow.

“You know I used to be better at this,” Benny murmured as they rode, keeping to the woods, not deep enough to wear the horses out with rough terrain, but deep enough to avoid the living.

“Riding?” The Lieutenant asked.

“No, tactics. You retire from the army, you get fucking twenty pounds fatter, you sit at home, you watch daytime television, your mind rots and then this happens and you fucking fail at the only thing you were ever good at.”

“We all grow older, Mr. Malone,” Mena said softly. “You did what you could.”

Benny was sullen on his beautiful black and white paint.

“I don't know you well, Father,” Delgado said. “But...I wouldn't have done anything different from what you did.”

“Thanks strange marine,” Benny said almost sarcastically.

“Hey, Texian,” the Lieutenant offered, hoping to cheer up the poor little fancy man. “You got yourself a horse and...isn't that all a cowboy needs?”

“Fuck you, Cajun,” Benny murmured. It was without feeling and quite unlike him. “I'm out of bullets, I'm out of ideas. I don't know. Maybe it's time to die.”

It was a joke, but a dark one and no one else was laughing.

“How about one yeehaw while you're on that horse?” The Lieutenant kept pressing, knowing he was getting somewhere with the teasing.

Benny's eyes shone a little in amusement, though he still looked disappointed.

“Just a soft one? For me?” The Lieutenant went on.

“I'll give you a fucking yeehaw,” Benny grumbled. Turning to Mena, he said, “I have to admit, Abbess, I'm shocked at you. I thought you'd jump up my ass and stay there about that man back there.”

“About how you allowed him to die?” She inquired archly.

“So you are mad?” Benny asked with a small, almost proud smile.

“Mr. Malone,” she began in that way that the Lieutenant knew was her gearing up to scold. Both Benny and the Lieutenant also geared up, bracing for the blow, and even though he was new to their dynamic, even Delgado seemed to steel himself in preparation.

But she didn't follow it up with anything.

Abbess of the Veil of Tears of the Sacred Virgin Convent, Mother Mena, petite and polite, just sat on the horse in front of Delgado and gazed long and hard at the horizon before them.

The Lieutenant was peering at her from his own horse, and Benny dropped over his own saddle horn to peer past the Lieutenant to join in on the staring.

Both men exchanged a curious look at each other, before Benny prodded, “Abbess?”

“There's so much death and dying in this new land,” she began softly, all fire gone from her tone. “I can't bring myself to care much.”

There was a second, only a beat really, before Benny said, “well, now, that sounds like the tone of someone who's defeated!” His loud, overly friendly, almost mocking voice rang off of the surrounding hills and hit back at them hard. It was too plastic, too fake. Just like the Lieutenant, Benny didn't like to hear Mena sound so...apathetic and it must have chased his own defeated attitude off.

Yelling, scolding, even a sermon, was better than this apathy from Mena.

“Dead,” Delgado warned, just as his horse nickered uncomfortably, prancing closer to the Lieutenant's.

The smell was in the air, something rotten, something that wasn't just an old stump in the woods.

Slipping down from his horse, the Lieutenant tossed his reins at Benny and said, “get the others back to the convent. We need to protect the horses.”

Mena struggled against Delgado's arms, and hopped down too to join him.

He didn't have time to tell her to get back on the horse, just pulled her behind him.

She welded her knife though and while she obeyed his wordless order to get behind him, she peeked out from around him to keep an eye on the rapidly approaching dead.

Benny and Delgado were long gone and it was fine, the Lieutenant was used to this new land, but he didn't care for the fact that Mena had to hop down with him. She would be one distraction he didn't need.

But she was here and today seemed as good a day as any for her to learn the hard way about the dead.

Kicking the first one to reach them square in the chest, he sent it back into the others hard, the one at the back collapsing.

Among the snarls and almost hisses of the dead, he heard Mena gasp and chanced only a quick glance over his shoulder, to find the grass rustling to their right as well. More dead.

“Run,” he commanded her, killing one of the uggies that lunged at them with his own knife, before shoving her hard in the direction the grass wasn't rustling in.

She screamed as another of the dead came out of the grass, toppling her and sending them both into the grass to disappear.

With no option, as the uggies were at his heels, he swept into the area the two had tumbled and stomped hard on the uggie's head as it struggled to get to its feet beside Mena who was laying on the ground.

She leapt up and joined him in running towards the woods, but not before punching at one of the dead that had caught up with them. It sent it off course, but didn't topple it. They were so close to the trees, but he knew they wouldn't make it, the dead were already grasping at the backs of their shirts. Grabbing Mena by the upper arm hard, he shoved her ahead of him and stopped, allowing the five dead to topple him, letting his feast be the distraction she would need to escape.

He kicked and punched hard at the group, stuffing his marine issued boot into the mouth of one that was at his legs, preventing it from biting, trying to avoid being bitten by the others using his knife to block any mouth that was thrown at him. It was a battle he was losing fast, there were too many. One of the uggies dropped to the ground heavily beside him, then rapid gunfire and the rest were dropping fast. Scrambling back and away from the pile of dead, he looked himself over for a bite, the action happening too fast for him to notice anything.

Mena was at his side, helping him up, her knife black with the dead's blood.

“Come on,” she urged him, yanking him towards the woods.

Just inside the tree line Delgado had stationed himself up in a tree and was holding his hand down to them to help them up into the old oak. He was so fucking welcome into the group at that moment, hand held down to them, rifle in his other.

Mena first, the Lieutenant ensured that, pushing her up, before following.

“Did they get you?” Delgado asked.

Still looking over his arms, in the safety of the tree as more dead emerged from the grass to gather below, he shook his head. “I don't think so.” He checked and rechecked for a bite, hands shaking. It was close, too close. He had been so damned careful, but that was...it was too close.

“You're lucky you were heading for me,” Delgado murmured, between taking shots at the uggies. “You would have been dead.”

“Thanks,” the Lieutenant breathed. He assumed the man had jumped off his horse as well, sending Benny on to the convent. And he was fucking grateful for the other marine.

Sitting on a branch above them, Mena was quiet.

Reaching up, the Lieutenant tweaked at her booted foot, trying to put her at ease, comforting her the best he could.

“You okay?” He asked her between shots.

She nodded, wide eyes on the dead below them.

“It's okay,” he said. “There can't be that many, Delgado has the ammo to put them all down.” Unless there's more out there and they're all coming to the sound of the shots, he thought, but kept that to himself. It was only then that he realized he didn't have Marie on his back and remembered putting her on the fucking horse in the rifle holster.

Great place for her, you fucking couyon.

There was only five or so left, so he turned to Mena.

“Once these uggies are put down, we have to climb down and run like hell,” he ordered, feeling like the CO he was once more. “There could be more headed this way, we stay close together, we don't stop running until we hit the convent or some kind of shelter. Do you understand?”

She nodded.

“Yes?” He urged needing an auditory agreement that she understood his orders.

“Yes.”

Three more left and the Lieutenant tried hard to ignore the way his branch was cracking under his weight, only three more. It gave out at two left and despite him trying to grab another branch, he fell straight down with the branch, collapsing on one of the uggies below hard. So hard he heard the poor uggies ribs crunch. Delgado shot the last one as he stabbed the poor dead woman in the eye and put her out of her misery, before getting to his feet shakily. He was getting too old to fall out of fucking trees that was for damned sure, but he was grateful for the uggie that broke his fall.

Jumping down, Delgado gave them cover as the Lieutenant reached up and helped Mena down. Then the three of them ran as a unit, into the woods, away from the tree and the tall grass.

Keeping Mena in front of them always, the Lieutenant found Delgado keeping pace with her, hand holding her upper arm. The man had flawlessly moved into the proper position for protecting a civilian from gunfire and for a moment the Lieutenant was a marine again. It was nice to have that trained companion who knew how protocols worked.

They moved through the woods as fast and as carefully as they could, before they stumbled into the clearing where the lagoon for the convent was. They weren't far, but coming up the ass end.

At the sight of the wall, the Lieutenant actually exhaled the breath he had been holding and with Delgado's help, they boosted Mena up onto the wall first, before the Lieutenant stooped down for the other man.

Once all three were on the wall, they sat down and just took a moment.

He looked himself over once more, paranoid a little now that he had been bitten, but he saw nothing but scratches from the branches of the tree and a few dings from the fall. His ankle hurt a bit, but he would be back to one hundred percent in a few days.

“Any battle you can walk away from, huh?” He asked Delgado.

The other marine looked at him with his serious, dark eyes, before a small, almost bashful, dimpled smile spread over his face.

Giving one last, dramatic exhale, the Lieutenant hopped gingerly down from the wall and held his arms out for Mena, but again, Delgado had beaten him to her, easing her down, his hands holding hers, before he hopped down himself.

“You alright?” The Lieutenant asked Mena as they walked around the church.

She nodded, pale and drawn, but seemingly alright.

Grasping hold of his hand before they could emerge from the five foot space between the church and the east wall, she pulled him back into the shadows and peered up at him sombrely.

“Thank you,” she said sincerely, brown eyes so wide and so sweet as they gazed up at him. They were so dark and eternal in the shadows of the church that he swore he could see stars sparkling in them. “I'll never forget how you were prepared to die for me.”

Delgado, sensing he wasn't supposed to be there, just sort of slunk off, leaving them alone.

The Lieutenant didn't know why she was thanking him. He never understood the gratitude. He was trained to save lives, to protect, it wasn't just killing and war, though those were the unsavoury aspects of it. He was a marine, he joined to save lives. His life didn't matter, he wasn't a family man, he didn't have any reason to be alive other than protecting this convent and its people.

Mena, he supposed, more than any other. She was more important around here than him. She had nuns that needed her leadership.

Not good with serious talk, with real emotions, he chucked her playfully on the chin and said, “you did good out there, kid.”

“Lieutenant,” she began, but he was already heading out from behind the church.

Benny came up to them, smiling at first, before calming himself and saying, “gotta play hero, huh? That's gonna get you killed someday.”

“It was almost this day,” Mena stated.

“How's my horse, fancy man?” The Lieutenant inquired with a grin.

As they rounded the church, standing in front, heading for the gate, the Lieutenant noticed Delgado standing with his people in a tight circle, the survivors from his group having hardly moved from where they had been left.

Making a straight line for the new group, the Lieutenant found some nuns also heading in that direction, knowing they would get filled in there.

“So are we being asked to leave then?” One of Delgado's people asked.

“No,” Mena answered for the marine. “We aren't making anyone go anywhere. We still have the agreement than you'd help us in dealing with these men and to be honest I would never turn away anyone who needed shelter and safety here. I just ask that you pitch in with chores. Have you been offered tea or water?” She asked.

They nodded.

“Have you been fed?”

They shook their heads.

Mena frowned, but only offered the nuns with them a small, withering glare, before saying, “well, then let's go inside the cloister and get you something to eat. We can have an early lunch.”

“I'll have to skip hunting today,” the Lieutenant said. “Until the area is calmed down, somewhat. All the shooting and commotion probably scared away the game anyways.”

“Good,” she said. “You can work on digging us another privy hole.”

“Latrine duty, huh?” He asked with a small grin. “For saving your life?”

“For being reckless,” she replied coolly.

He nodded, properly stripped down. “Alright.”

“I can help with that,” Delgado said. “Jack, Billy? Let's get you working with the nursing nuns.”

“That would be Sisters Mary Monica and Mary Claire, they're in that building over there. It's the infirmary, but first your people eat.”

As Mena led the new people away, the Lieutenant watched their retreating backs, the gears in his mind already turning.

“Why's she's pissed at you?” Benny asked, coming to stand with him.

“I don't know,” he lied.

“Well, enjoy the doghouse, dipshit,” the shorter man scoffed, heading after the others.

“Why are you mad now?” He called out after him.

Benny turned in his tracks, walking backwards. “Because you didn't need to jump down from your fucking horse. We could have outrun the dead. You have a hero complex or a death wish. And you need to fix your shit!”

“So what? You wanted us to run the horses here and lead the dead to our door? Was that your plan?”

Benny turned around and scowled darkly, folding his arms. “Is this about me bringing these people here?”

“Look,” the Lieutenant began diplomatically. “We both fucked up today. Let's call it a scratch match.”

“We need to get our shit together,” Benny agreed.

Exhaling a sigh, the Lieutenant knew Benny might be right.

#graveyard dirt & salt series #novel #sorry it took me so long to update #thought no one was reading this anymore #shout out to #gothamsgaygirlgang

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kathyprior4200 · 4 years

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Alastor Playlist and Soundtrack

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SVGNjWPGVbA&list=PLWFYZb-mcJq3iLDvWh9xpnBNBVkDhXh-w

So many people have wondered what Alastor’s human life could’ve been like. There have been fan art, stories and several animations of Alastor when he was a radio host and serial killer. But surely there could be more clues as to what also occurred.

In fact there are, and they could very well be right in front of your eyes…or should I say, your ears.

Behold an official Alastor playlist.

Yes, Vivziepop herself made a playlist for Alastor a while back.

AlBirdVampPrince on YouTube thankfully provided it before it was lost to the web. When I listened to the cheery old time jazz intermingled with the catchy beats, I was instantly teleported into another time. For several moments, I was immersed in Alastor’s world, watching him dance with flapper ladies, exploring the woods, playing a variety of instruments, and yes, his radio show and murders as well. I couldn’t help but grin from ear to ear listening to the songs.

These songs shed a brand new light on a beloved popular character in Hazbin Hotel. Music is a central theme for the show and the personalities of the characters. Just look at Charlie and Alastor. Sometimes, all it takes is music and a song to delve into a character’s head.

Here is a list of sixteen songs that were shown on the list.

1 “Annie: You’re Never Fully Dressed Without A Smile”

Ah yes, the all-too familiar song from the classic Annie musical in 1982. The song is by Peter Marshall. The song was played during the Iodent toothpaste commercial scene. Mr. Warbucks goes on the radio and offers 50,000 dollars to anyone who claimed to be Annie’s parents. The orphan girls later sing it as they listen to the radio. The meaning of the song: no matter how you dress or what social class you come from, happiness is what makes people stand out. The song has been used in many remakes of Annie such as the 1999 and 2014 versions.

This song would be Alastor’s favorite. He even quoted it in the show, saying to Vaggie, “Smile my dear! You know you’re never fully dressed without one!” It is evident that Vivziepop enjoys Annie and many other musicals, hence all the references in the show and her art.

Ever since then, lyrics and music have been used in dozens of fan art and projects. Gabriel C. Brown, the singing voice of Alastor, even did a cover of the song on YouTube. Often times, the lyrics are displayed whenever Alastor’s mother is drawn. A popular theory suggests that Alastor’s mother told him that he was never fully dressed without a smile, as a way of cheering him up during tough times.

In Kathy Prior 42’s Human Alastor backstory, this song would be played as the intro song as fans immediately associate this song with Alastor. Alastor plays this song after every broadcast, the song that keeps him going every day. It would also appear in the ending credits. Alastor’s Creole mother Antoinette Moreau encourages a young Alastor to smile and stand tall when she sings this to him. For Alastor, it’s not just a fun song…it’s something that helps remind him of his mother and what his purpose is.

Lyrics:

(spoken) This is Bert Healy saying…

(singing)

Hey, Hobo Man

Hey Dapper Dan

You’ve both got your style

But brother

You’re never fully dressed

Without a smile

Your clothes may be Beau Brummelly

They stand out a mile

But brother

You’re never fully dressed

Without a smile

Who cares what they’re wearing

On Main Street

Or Saville Row

It’s what you wear from ear to ear

And not from head to toe

That matters

So, Senator

So, Janitor

So long for a while

Remember,

You’re never fully dressed

Without a smile

(Boylan sister)

Ready or not, here he goes

Listen to Bert

Tap his smilin’ toes

(Healy)

(spoken) Ah the lovely Boylan Sisters

(Boylan Sisters)

Doo doodle-oo doo

Doo doo doo doo

Your clothes may be Beau Brummelly

They stand out a mile

But brother

You’re never fully dressed without an

(Connie): S

(Bonnie): M

(Ronnie): I

(Connie): L

(All three): E. Smile darn ya smile.

2 “Smile”

Here we have another song about smiling, but this one has a different tone than the previous one. This song was originally sung by Nat King Cole, charted in 1954, composed by Charlie Chaplin. “Smile’ was used as a soundtrack in the 1936 movie “Modern Times.”

Lyrics of this song are shown on old Alastor Zoophobia art by Vivziepop. The art shows an old version of Alastor wearing a black suit doing a magic trick and singing the first few lines of the song.

In Kathy Prior 42’s Human Alastor backstory, Alastor’s mother sings this song to him after he deals with both bullying from his classmates and the constant abuse from his father. It is a song to remind him that smiling is a sign of strength to get through the hard times. Alastor is stunned to find that his mother smiles through the hits and bruises that his father gives her. Even daily discrimination at work doesn’t stop her from doing it. Alastor takes this lesson to heart and makes it into a life-long habit...even after death. Though he smiles all the time, the burden of hiding his feelings inside is only evident to him. In addition, Alastor sings a lament of this song after his mother’s death via the Spanish Flu and Mimzy’s accidental death by poisoning. The song gives out mixed messages: for while it helped Alastor remain confident throughout his life and afterlife, it also conforms to the masculinity message of “boys and men don’t cry.” Sadness is a natural human emotion and there are times when it cannot be repressed.

Lyrics:

Smile, through your heart is aching

Smile, even though it’s breaking

When there are clouds in the sky

You’ll get by…

If you smile

Through your fear and sorrow

Smile and maybe tomorrow

You’ll see the sun come shining through for you

Light up your face with gladness

Hide every trace of sadness

Although a tear may ever be so near

That’s the time you must keep on trying

Smile, what’s the use of crying

You’ll find that life is worthwhile

If you just smile

That’s the time you must keep on trying

Smile, what’s the use of crying

You’ll find that life is worthwhile

If you just smile

3 “Let’s Misbehave”

Anyone else notice the title on one of the Hazbin Hotel thumbnails of Alastor in static? Yes, it is an actual song. The song was written by Cole Porter in 1927. It was a 1928 hit for Irving Aaronson and his Commanders and has been used in several films.

In “Smiling Man” by MuseValentine, a human Alastor says “Let’s misbehave” to a human Charlie before they make love behind Lucifer’s back.

In Kathy Prior 42’s Alastor Human backstory, Alastor was born in 1896, thus in 1928, he is in his early thirties. Alastor and Mimzy get into trouble, they cuddle in a hotel room and almost have sex. Alastor holds back because he doesn’t want to get intimate with anyone, much to her disbelief and sadness. This was before her death. Alastor berates himself for being so careless and begins to question his own sexuality, (which is perceived as abnormal by society and everyone else).

Lyrics:

We’re all alone

No chaperone

Can get our number

The world’s in slumber

Let’s misbehave

There’s something wild

About you, child

That’s so contagious

Let’s be outrageous

Let’s misbehave

When Adam won Eve’s hand

He wouldn’t stand

For teasin’

He didn’t care about

Those apples out of season

They say the spring

Means just one thing

To little lovebirds

We’re not above birds

Let’s misbehave

If you’d be just so sweet

And only meet

Your fate, dear

‘Twould be the great

Event of nineteen twenty eight

Dear!

Let’s misbehave

Let’s misbehave!

4 “You Rascal You”

This song was sung by Cab Calloway in 1931, published in 1929. The lyrics take the form of threats leveled against a man who runs off with the singer’s wife, after the singer was kind to him.

Alastor’s Human backstory has a couple scenes for this song. The first scene is when Alastor finds out that his father had been sleeping with other women behind his mother’s back. Alastor had tried to reason with his father, but he eventually snapped. Alastor has angry thoughts about killing his father, which he eventually does.

The second scene is less prominent. Although Alastor was not in love with Mimzy, he got possessive when other men tried to flirt with her. One racist horny man goes off with Mimzy leaving Alastor by himself. His good friend had been taken from him, after Alastor had been kind to both of them. So what does he do? Hunts down the man and kills him, of course.

Lyrics:

You sure is a rascal

I’ll be glad when you dead, you rascal you!

When you dead in your grave

No more women will you crave

I’ll be glad when you dead, you rascal you!

I trust you in my home, you rascal you

I trust you in my home

You wouldn’t leave my wife alone

I’ll be glad when you dead, you rascal you!

I fed you since last fall, you rascal you

I fed you since last fall

Then you got your ashes hauled

I’ll be glad when you dead, you rascal you!

You asked my wife to wash your clothes, you rascal you

You asked my wife to wash your clothes

And something else I suppose

I’ll be glad when you dead, you rascal you!

You know you done me wrong, you rascal you

You know you done me wrong

You done stole my wife and gone

I’ll be glad when you dead, you rascal you!

You asked my wife for a meal, you rascal you

You asked my wife for a meal

And something else you tried to steal

I’ll be glad when you dead, you rascal you!

Please don’t let me find you, rascal you

Please don’t let me find you

‘Cause you’ll leave this world behind you

I’ll be glad when you dead, you rascal you!

Ain’t no use to run, you rascal you

Aint no use to run

I done bought a Gatling gun

And you’re still having your fun, you rascal you!

I’m gonna kill you just for fun, you rascal you!

I’m gonna kill you just for fun

The buzzards gonna have you when I’m done

I’ll be glad when you dead, you rascal you!

You done messed with my wife, you rascal you

You done messed with my wife

And I’m gonna take your life

I’ll be glad when you dead, you rascal you!

5 “I ain’t gonna tell nobody”

This song was made in 1923 by Richard M. Jones. King Oliver and his Creole Jazz band recorded it in 1923…it was likely one of the many songs that Alastor heard and enjoyed. One of the songs that inspired him to be a jazz band leader.

6 “The Charleston”

Ah the Charleston, the popular dance style from the 1920s. The dance used in so many fanfictions and art with Alastor and Charlie in it. And the inspiration for the “Charlastor” shipping name for Alastor and Charlie in the fandom. “The Charleston” was by James P. Johnson and it was in the 1923 Broadway show Runnin’ Wild. A melody of it was made by Arthur Gibbs.

In Alastor’s human backstory, Alastor dances the Charleston with Mimzy in 1923 during the Roaring 20s at the peak of his life and career. He later dances with Charlie at the Hazbin Hotel in Hell.

Lyrics:

Carolina, Carolina, at last they’ve got you on the map,

With a new tune, funny blue tune, with a peculiar snap!

You may not be able to buck or wing

Foxtrot, two-step, or even sing

If you’ve not got religion in your feet

You can do this prance and do it neat

Charleston! Charleston! Made in Carolina!

Some dance, some prance,

I’ll say there’s nothing finer than the

Charleston, Charleston, gee how you can shuffle

Every step you do leads to something new

Man, I’m telling you, it’s a lapazoo!

Buck dance, wing dance will be a back number,

But the Charleston, the new Charleston,

That dance is surely a corner

Sometime, you’ll dance it one time,

That dance called Charleston,

Made in South Caroline!

7 “Runnin’ Wild”

The song is by Duke Ellington, and was made in 1922.

In Alastor’s human backstory, this song that Alastor sings describes the fun care-free moments that Alastor had in his youth. The events included feeding alligators in the bayou, exploring the woods, seeing animals and being outside.

The second scene with this song is in 1922 when Alastor gets tired of Mimzy being clingy. Alastor doesn’t love anyone in a romantic way…he had lost the one person he loved many years ago. Due to past trauma, he puts on a persona but doesn’t trust people enough to let them in fully into his life. Not wanting to meet her expectations of being a perfect man, Alastor longs to be himself and be free again. Alastor and Mimzy try to reconcile at a bar, only for her to die later on. Alastor kills people to vent his frustrations. The song is a reflection of Alastor becoming a villain.

Lyrics:

My gal and I, we had a fight

And I’m all by myself

I guess she thinks now that she’s gone

I’ll lay right on the shelf

I’m gonna show her she’s all wrong

No lonesome stuff for me

I won’t sit home, all alone

She’ll soon find that I’m

Runnin’ wild, lost control

Runnin’ wild, mighty bold

Feelin’ gay, reckless too

Care free mind all the time, never blue

Always goin’ don’t know where

Always showin’ I don’t care

Don’t love nobody, it’s not worth while

All alone, runnin’ wild. Runnin’ wild.

When I first met that gal of mine

It seemed just like a dream

But when she thought she had me right

She started acting mean

Like Mary led her little lamb

She led me all the time

Until the worm had to turn

That’s the reason I’m

Runnin’ wild, lost control

Runnin’ wild, mighty bold

Feelin’ gay, reckless too

Care free mind all the time, never blue

Always goin’ don’t know where

Always showin’ I don’t care

Don’t love nobody, it’s not worth while

All alone, runnin’ wild. Runnin’ wild.

No gal will ever make a fool of me

No gal! I mean just what I say

I ain’t the simpleton I used to be

Wonder how I got that way

Once I was full of sentiment, it’s true

But now I got a cruel heart

With all that other foolishness, I’m through

Gonna play the villain part

Runnin’ wild, lost control

Runnin’ wild, mighty bold

Feelin’ gay, reckless too

Care free mind all the time, never blue

Always goin’ don’t know where

Always showin’ I don’t care

Don’t love nobody, it’s not worth while

All alone, runnin’ wild. Runnin’ wild.

8 “I’m Sitting on Top of the World”

A song by Al Jonson in 1928. Alastor would sing this song as he talks about his new rich life as a radio host. He likes the money but he also likes Mimzy and other women.

Lyrics:

I'm sitting on top of the world, I'm rolling along, I'm rolling along. I'm quitting the blues of the world, Just singing a song, Just singing a song. Glory hallelujah, i just phoned the parson, Hey, par, get ready to call.' Just like humpty dumpty, I'm going to fall. I'm sitting on top of the world, Just rolling along, Just rolling along.' Some people have diamonds And beautiful pearls, While others have children, Just kiddies with curls. Keep all of your fortunes, Keep all of your fame, I just found a sweetie Who's changing her name. : I'm sitting on top of the world, Just rolling along, Just rolling along. I'm quitting the blues of the world, Just singing a song, Just singing a song. Glory hallelujah, i just phoned the parson, Hey, par, get ready to call.' Just like humpty dumpty, I'm going to fall. I'm sitting on top of the world, Just rolling along, Just rolling along.' Don't want any millions, I'm getting my share. I've only got one suit, That's all i can wear. A bundle of money won't make you feel gay. A sweet little honey is making me say: I'm sitting on top of the world, Just rolling along, Just rolling along. I'm quitting the blues of the world, Just singing a song, Just singing a song. Glory hallelujah, i just phoned the parson, Hey, par, get ready to call.' Just like humpty dumpty, I'm going to fall. I'm sitting on top of the world, Just rolling along, Just rolling along.

9 “Criminal” (American Horror Story)

This song might reference Alastor’s general life as a criminal...or perhaps Mimzy’s dark thoughts regarding her feelings for Alastor.

Lyrics:

I've been a bad, bad girl I've been careless with a delicate man And its a sad, sad world When a girl will break a boy Just because she can Oh, help me But don't tell me to deny it I've got to cleanse myself of all these lies 'Till I'm good enough for him I got a lot to lose, and I'm bettin' high So I'm beggin' you: Before it ends, just tell me where to begin Ooh, What I need is a good defense 'Cause I'm feelin' like a criminal And I need to redeemed To the one I've sinned against Because he's all I ever knew of love Yeah, What I need is a good defense 'Cause I'm feelin' like a criminal And I need to redeemed To the one I've sinned against Because he's all I ever knew of love

10 “Blood” (My Chemical Romance)

Yes. Vivziepop adores My Chemical Romance. It is obvious from the many MCR songs that she provides to her characters. (“Sing” for Charlie, “Na Na Na” for Cherri Bomb, “Mama” for Angel Dust, etc.) This one called “Blood” undeniably relates to Alastor’s murder and cannibalism activities. (Let’s face it, Vivzie loves musicals so much, Hazbin Hotel is one giant musical, with nearly every character knowing how to sing and play a variety of instruments! Hazbin Logic.)

Lyrics:

Well they encourage your complete cooperation Send you roses when they think you need to smile I can't control myself because I don't know how, And they love me for it honestly, I'll be here for a while

So give them blood, blood, gallons of the stuff Give them all that they can drink and it will never be enough So give them blood, blood, blood Grab a glass because there's going to be a flood

A celebrated man amongst the gurneys They can fix me proper with a bit of luck The doctors and the nurses they adore me so, But it's really quite alarming cause I'm such an awful fuck (oh thank you)

I gave you blood, blood, gallons of the stuff, I gave you all that you can drink and it has never been enough I gave you blood, blood, blood, I'm the kind of human wreckage that you love

11 “Doctor Jazz”

“Doctor Jazz” was made written by Joe King Oliver in 1926 and recorded by Jelly Roll Morton.

This is one of many songs that Alastor sings in his backstory. This song plays when Alastor loses himself in the blissful moments playing trumpets, saxophones and singing onstage. Music and jazz helped Alastor out during hard times of discrimination and him witnessing police brutality against African Americans and disadvantaged individuals. In music, Alastor felt safe, confident, invincible.

Lyrics:

Everybody gets the blues now and then, and don’t know what to do

I’ve had it happen many times to me before and so have you

But those days have gone and past, I found out what to do at last

When I feel down and out, you will hear me shout:

Hello central, give me Doctor Jazz

He’s got what I need, I’ll say he has

When the world goes wrong and I’ve got the blues

He’s the guy who makes me put on both my dancin’ shoes

The more I get, the more I want it soon

I see Doctor Jazz in all my dreams

When I’m in trouble, bounds are mixed

He’s the guy who gets me fixed

Hello central, give me Doctor Jazz

12 “Main Title and Anatomy of a Murder”

The song comes from a 1959 courtroom drama film by Duke Ellington. This song gives off a “sneaky, spy” like vibe, a tension of “who done it,” in the music. This track would play during the mention of the mysterious “Louisiana Lunatic” in the newspapers, plus Alastor’s broadcasts of all the deaths he caused.

13 “God Moves On The Water”

This song is by Billie Willie Johnson in 1929. This song describes the sinking of the Titanic in 1912 (the year of Baxter’s death). It was an event that Alastor wasn’t involved in, but presumably found entertaining like the 1929 Stock Market Crash.

This song could relate to the many hurricane disasters that went on in Alastor’s life in Louisiana but was lucky enough to survive in. The song could also reference the distress and helplessness that people of color, women and other minority groups felt in the clutches of a dominant white society.

Lyrics:

Ah, Lord, ah, Lord Year of nineteen hundred and twelve, April the fourteenth day Great Titanic struck an iceberg, people had to run and pray God moves, moves, God moves, ah, and the people had to run and pray The guards who had been a-watching, asleep 'cause they were tired When they heard the great excitement, then a gunshot was fired God moves, moves, God moves, ah, and the people had to run and pray

Captain Smith gave orders, women and children first Many of the lifeboats piled right up, many were liable to crush God moves on, God moves, God moves, ah, and the people had to run and pray

So many had to leave their happy home, all that they possess Lord Jesus, will you hear us now, help us in our distress God moves, God moves, God moves, ah, people had to run and pray Women had to leave their loving ones, see 'bout their safety When they heard the liner was doomed, hearts did almost break God moves, God moves, God moves, ah, and the people had to run and pray A.G. Smith, mighty man, built a boat that he couldn't understand Named it a name of God in a tin, without a "c", Lord, he pulled it in God moves, ah, God moves, God moves, ah, and the people had to run and pray Well Ah, ah, Lord

14 “Minnie the Moocher”

“Minnie the Moocher” by Cao Calloway is a vocalizing catchy song about a beautiful woman named Minnie. This song could possibly relate to rumors about Mimzy and her famous wealthy life.

Lyrics:

Folks, here's a story 'bout Minnie the Moocher She was a red-hot hoochie-coocher She was the roughest, toughest frail But Minnie had a heart as big as a whale

Hi-dee hi-dee hi-dee hi (hi-dee hi-dee hi-dee hi) Whoa-a-a-a-ah (whoa-a-a-a-ah) Hee-dee-hee-dee-hee-dee-hee (hee-dee-hee-dee-hee-dee-hee) He-e-e-e-e-e-e-y (he-e-e-e-e-e-e-y)

She messed around with a bloke named Smokey She loved him though was cokey He took her down to Chinatown And he showed her how to kick the gong around

Hi-dee hi-dee hi-dee hi (hi-dee hi-dee hi-dee hi) Whoa-a-a-a-ah (whoa-a-a-a-ah) He-e-e-e-e-e-e-y (he-e-e-e-e-e-e-y) Oh-oh-oh-oh (oh-oh-oh-oh)

She had a dream about the King of Sweden He gave her things that she was needin' He gave her a home built of gold and steel A diamond car with a p-la-ti-num wheel

Hi-dee hi-dee hi-dee hi (hi-dee hi-dee hi-dee hi) Ho-dee-ho-dee-ho-dee ho (ho-dee-ho-dee-ho-dee ho) Skip-de-diddly-skip-de-diddly-diddly-oh (skip-de-diddly-skip-de-diddly-diddly-oh) Bour'rrigy-bour'rrigy-bour'rrigy-oh (bour'rrigy-bour'rrigy-bour'rrigy-oh)

He gave her his townhouse and his racing horses Each meal she ate was a dozen courses She had a million dollars worth of nickels and dimes She sat around and counted them all a million times

Hi-dee hi-dee hi-dee hi (hi-dee hi-dee hi-dee hi) Whoa-a-a-a-ah (whoa-a-a-a-ah) He-e-e-e-e-e-e-y (he-e-e-e-e-e-e-y) Whoa-a-a-a-ah (whoa-a-a-a-ah)

Poor Min, poor Min, poor Min

15 “Crazy Rhythm”

This song was made by Whispering Jack Smith in 1928.

Perhaps this song is a reference to Alastor having to put aside his free music playing time at the cost of being a famous radio host. Although, Alastor had risen to fame, his former innocence had been lost.

Lyrics:

I feel like the Emperor Nero when Rome was a very hot town

Father Knickerbocker, forgive me, I play while your city burns down

Through all its night I fiddle away

It’s not the right life but think of the pay

Someday I will bid it goodbye, I’ll put my fiddle away and I’ll say

Crazy rhythm here’s the doorway

I’ll go my way, you’ll go your way

Crazy rhythm from now on we’re through

Here is where we have a showdown

I’m too high-hat, you’re too low-down

Crazy rhythm here’s goodbye to you

They say that when a high-brow meets a low-brow walking along Broadway

Soon the high-brow has no brow

Ain’t it a shame, and you’re to blame

What’s the use of Prohibition (banning alcohol)

You produce the same condition

Crazy rhythm I’ve gone crazy too

Every Greek and each Latin, the Russians and Prussians as well

When they seek the lure of

Manhattan, are sure to come under your spell

Their native folksongs they soon throw away

Those harlem smoke songs they soon learn to play

Can’t you fall for Carnegie Hall

Oh Danny, call it a day and we’ll say

Crazy rhythm here’s the doorway

I’ll go my way, you’ll go your way

Crazy rhythm from now on we’re through

Here is where we have a showdown

I’m too high-hat, you’re too low-down

Crazy rhythm here’s goodbye to you

They say that when a high-brow meets a low-brow walking along Broadway

Soon the high-brow has no brow

Ain’t it a shame, and you’re to blame

What’s the use of Prohibition (banning alcohol)

You produce the same condition

Crazy rhythm I’ve gone crazy too

16 “My Shiny Teeth and Me”

Another smile song, by Nate Wants To Battle, this one about how a guy admires his shiny teeth. A reference to Alastor’s self-centered ego. In sheer irony, Alastor has yellow teeth in Hell. Deer man needs to brush his teeth!

Lyrics:

When I'm feelin' lonely - sad as I can be.. All by my self in an uncharted island in an endless sea.. What makes me happy, fills me up with glee: Those bones in my jaw that don't have a flaw. My shiny teeth and me. My shiny teeth that twinkle just like the stars in space, My shiny teeth that sparkle addin' beauty to my face, My shiny teeth that glisten just like a Christmas tree. You know they'll walk a mile just to see me smile... Woo! My shiny teeth and me! Yes they're all so perfect; so white and pearly. Brush, gargle, rinse - A couple breath mints... My shiny teeth and me! My shiny teeth so awesome, just like your favorite song. My shiny teeth I floss em' so they grow to be real strong. My shiny teeth I love them and they all love me, Why should I talk to you when I got 32! Woo! My shiny teeth and me, My shiny teeth and me! My shiny teeth that twinkle just like the stars in space, My shiny teeth that sparkle addin' beauty to my face, My shiny teeth that glisten just like a Christmas tree. You know they'll walk a mile just to see me smile... Woo! My shiny teeth and me. My shiny teeth and me. My shiny teeth and me!

17 “The Radio Demon”

An official soundtrack in the pilot episode. The circus music that turns dark with organs playing. It plays when Vaggie tells of how Alastor got into power. This song plays after Alastor’s death and during the ending credits in the backstory. It serves as a transition to Alastor arriving in Hell, the next act in the character arc.

#alastor #hazbinhotel #vivziepop

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marunalu · 4 years

Text

Disney Movies List

Ok first of all I want to make clear that english is not my first language. I therefore apologize in advance for any grammar or spelling mistakes. Please don't be too strict with me =D

I recently bought Disney+ and I plan now to watch and review every movie, Disney has ever produced or participated in it. And I tell you, this will be a hell of a trip, because my list now contains no fewer than 701 movies. That means if I watch at least one movie every day, it will take me about 2 years to see all of them. And since I will most likely not watch a movie every day, I will definitely need at least twice as long....

For the films on my list, which I marked with a cross at the end, it means that I have seen them already. However, since I last saw most of these movies in my childhood or teenage years (so at least 15 years ago), it will be interesting for me to rewatch them after such a long time. I have probably already forgotten most of the plots.

I also plan to watch them in chronological order and rank them. The movies that I don't find on Disney+ I will watch somewhere else.

Here is the list: (The films follow the chronological order in which they were published. However, it is quite possible that I accidentally swapped a few. But I think most of it is accurate).

1930:

Academy Award Review of Walt Disney Cartoons (X)

Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs (X)

1940:

Pinocchio (X)

Fantasia (X)

The Reluctant Dragon ( )

Dumbo (X)

Bambi (X)

Saludos Amigos ( )

Victory Through Air Power ( )

The Three Caballores ( )

Make Mine Music ( )

Song of the South ( )

Fun and Fancy Free (X)

Melody Time ( )

Seal Island ( )

So Dear to my Heart ( )

The Adventures of Ichabod and Mr. Toad (X)

1950:

Cinderella (X)

Treasure Island ( )

In Beaver Valley ( )

Alice in Wonderland (X)

Nature's Half Acre ( )

The Story of Robin Hood and His Merrie Men ( )

The Olympic Elk ( )

Water Birds ( )

Peter Pan (X)

The Sword and the Rose ( )

The Living Desert (X)

Bear Country ( )

The Alaskan Eskimo ( )

Prowlers of the Everglades ( )

Rob Roy, the Highland Rogue ( )

The Vanishing Prairie ( )

20,000 Leagues Under the Sea ( )

Siam ( )

Davy Crockett, King of the Wild Frontier ( )

Lady and the Tramp (X)

The African Lion ( )

The Littlest Outlaw ( )

Men Against The Arctic ( )

The Great Locomotive Chase ( )

Davy Crockett and the River Pirates ( )

Secrets of Life ( )

Westward Ho the Wagons! ( )

Johnny Tremain ( )

Perri ( )

Old Yeller ( )

Navajo Adventure ( )

The Light in the Forest ( )

Tonka ( )

Grand Canyon ( )

Sleeping Beauty (X)

The Shaggy Dog ( )

Darby O'Gill and the Little People ( )

Zorro the Avenger ( )

Third Man on the Mountain ( )

Mysteries of the Deep ( )

1960:

Toby Tyler: Or, ten Weeks with a Circus ( )

Kidnapped ( )

Pollyanna ( )

The Sign of Zorro ( )

Jungle Cat ( )

Ten Who Dared ( )

Swiss Family Robinson ( )

Island of the Sea ( )

One Hundred and One Dalmatians (X)

The Absent-Minded Professsor ( )

Parent Trap ( )

Nikki, Wild Dog of the North ( )

Greyfriars Bobby: The True Story of a Dog ( )

Babes in Toyland ( )

Wonders of the Water Worlds ( )

Moon Pilot ( )

Bon Voyage! ( )

Big Red ( )

Almost Angels ( )

The Legend of Lobo ( )

In Search of the Castaways ( )

The Prince and the Pauper ( )

Son of Flubber ( )

Miracle of the White Stallions ( )

Savage Sam ( )

Summer Magic ( )

The Incredible Journey ( )

The Sword in the Stone (X)

A Tiger Walks ( )

The Misadventures of Merlin Jones ( )

The Three Lives of Thomasina ( )

The Moon-Spinners ( )

Mary Poppins ( )

Emil and the Detectives ( )

Those Calloways ( )

The Monkey's Uncle ( )

That Darn Cat! ( )

The Ugly Dachshund ( )

Lt. Robin Crusoe, U.S.N. ( )

The Fighting Prince of Donegal ( )

Follow Me, Boys! ( )

Monkeys, Go Home! ( )

The Adventures of Bullwhip Griffin ( )

The Gnome-Mobile ( )

The Jungle Book (X)

Charlie, the Lonesome Cougar ( )

The Happiest Millionaire ( )

Blackbeard's Ghost ( )

The One and Only, Genuine, Original Family Band ( )

Never a Dull Moment ( )

The Horse in the Grey Flannel Suit ( )

Guns in the Heather ( )

The Love Bug ( )

Smith! ( )

Rascal ( )

The Computer Whore Tennis Shoes ( )

My Dog, the Thief ( )

Ride a Northbound Horse ( )

1970:

King of the Grizzlies ( )

The Boatniks ( )

The Wild Country ( )

Smoke ( )

The Aristocats (X)

The Barefoot Executive ( )

Scandalous John ( )

The Million-Dollar-Duck ( )

Bedknobs and Broomsticks (X)

The Biscuit Eater ( )

Now You See Him, Now You Don't ( )

Napoleon and Samantha ( )

Run, Cougar, run ( )

Snowball Express ( )

Chandar, the Black Leopard of Ceylon ( )

The World's Greatest Athlete ( )

Charley and the Angel ( )

One Little Indian ( )

Robin Hood (X)

Mustang! ( )

Superdad ( )

Herbie Rides Again ( )

The Bears and I ( )

The Castaway Cowboy ( )

The Island at the Top of the World ( )

The Strongest Man in the World ( )

Escape to Witch Mountain ( )

The Apple Dumpling Gang ( )

One Of Our Dinosaurs Is Missing ( )

The Best of Walt Disney's True-Life Adventures ( )

Ride a Wild Pony ( )

The Boy Who Talked to Badgers ( )

No Deposit, No Return ( )

Treasure of Matecumbe ( )

Gus ( )

The Shaggy D.A. ( )

Freaky Friyday ( )

The Littlest Horse Thieves ( )

The Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh (X)

A Tale of Two Critters ( )

The Rescuers (X)

Herbie Goes to Monte Carlo ( )

Pete's Dragon ( )

Candleshoe ( )

Return form Witch Mountain ( )

The Cat from Outer Space ( )

Hot Lead and Cold Feet ( )

Child of Glass ( )

The North Avenue Irregulars ( )

The Apple Dumpling Gang Rides Again ( )

Unidentified Flying Oddball ( )

The Black Hole ( )

The Muppet Movie ( )

The London Connection ( )

1980:

Midnight Madness ( )

The Watcher in the Woods ( )

Herbie Goes Bananas ( )

The Last Flight of Noah's Ark ( )

Popeye ( )

The Devil and Max Devlin ( )

Amy ( )

Dragonslayer ( )

The Fox and the Hound (X)

Condorman ( )

The Great Muppet Caper ( )

Night Crossing ( )

Tron ( )

Tex ( )

Trenchcoat ( )

Something Wicked This Way Comes ( )

Tiger Town ( )

Never Cry Wolf ( )

Love Leads the Way (X)

Where the Toys Come From ( )

Return to Oz ( )

The Black Cauldron (X)

The Journey of Natty Gann ( )

One Magic Christmas ( )

Teen Academy ( )

The Great Mouse Detective (X)

Flight of the Navigator ( )

Disneys Fluppy Dogs ( )

The Parent Trap ( )

The Christmas Star ( )

Benji the Hunted ( )

Return of the Shaggy Dog ( )

Mr. Boogedy ( )

Return to Snowy River ( )

Oliver & Company (X)

Who Framed Roger Rabbit ( )

Honey, I Shrunk the Kids (X)

Cheetah ( )

The Little Mermaid (X)

Bride of Boogedy ( )

1990:

DuckTales: The Movie – Treasure of the Lost Lamp ( )

The Rescuers Down Under (X)

White Fang (X)

Shipwrecked ( )

Wild Hearts Can't be Broken ( )

The Rocketeer ( )

Beauty and the Beast (X)

Newsies ( )

Honey, I Blew Up the Kid ( )

The Mighty Ducks ( )

Aladdin (X)

The Muppet Christmas Carol ( )

Day-O ( )

Homeward Bound: The Incredible Journey (X)

A Far Off Place ( )

The Adventures of Huck Finn ( )

Hocus Pocus ( )

Cool Runnings ( )

The Nightmare Before Christmas ( )

The Three Musketeers ( )

Iron Will ( )

Blank Check ( )

D2: The Mighty Ducks ( )

White Fang 2: Myth of the White Wolf ( )

The Lion King (X)

Angels in the Outfield ( )

Squanto: A Warrior's Tale ( )

The Santa Clause (X)

The Jungle Book (X)

The Return of Jafar (X)

Heavyweights ( )

Man of the House ( )

Tall Tale ( )

A Goofy Movie ( )

Pocahontas (X)

Operation Dumbo Drop ( )

A Kid in King Arthur's Court ( )

The Big Green ( )

Frank and Ollie ( )

Toy Story (X)

Tom and Huck ( )

Gargoyles – The Movie ( )

Muppet Treasure Island ( )

Homeward Bound: Lost in San Francisco (X)

James and the Giant Peach ( )

The Hunchback of Notre Dame (X)

First Kid ( )

D3 The Mighty Ducks ( )

101 Dalmatians (X)

Aladdin and the King of Thieves (X)

Wish Upon a Star ( )

Susie Q ( )

The Darn Cat ( )

Jungle 2 Jungle (X)

George of the Jungle (X)

Air Bud (X)

RocketMan ( )

Flubber (X)

Mr. Magoo ( )

Tower of Terror ( )

Beauty and the Beast: The Enchanted Christmas ( )

Under Wraps ( )

Northern Lights ( )

Angels in the Endzone ( )

Mighty Ducks the Movie: The First Faceoff ( )

Pooh's Great Adventure: The Search for Christoper Robin ( )

Honey, We Shrunk Ourselves ( )

The Love Bug ( )

Rodgers & Hammerstein's Cinderella ( )

Oliver Twist ( )

Meet the Deedles ( )

Mulan (X)

The Parent Trap (X)

Air Bud: Golden Receiver ( )

I'll Be Home for Christmas ( )

A Bug's Life (X)

Mighty Joe Young ( )

You Lucky Dog ( )

Halloweentown ( )

Brink! ( )

Whoopi – A Knight in Camelot (X)

The Wonderful Ice Cream Suit ( )

Pocahontas 2: Journey to a New World ( )

The Lion King 2: Simbas Pride (X)

Belle's Magical World ( )

Armageddon ( )

Don't Look Under the Bed (X)

Genius ( )

The Thirteenth Year ( )

Johnny Tsunami ( )

Can of Worms ( )

Zenon: Girl of the 21st Century ( )

Horse Sense ( )

Smart House ( )

My Favorite Martian ( )

Doug – The 1. Movie ( )

Endurance ( )

Tarzan (X)

Inspector Gadget ( )

The Straight Story ( )

Toy Story 2 (X)

H.E. – Double Hockey Sticks ( )

Mickey's Once Upon a Christmas ( )

Winnie the Pooh: Seasons of Giving ( )

Annie ( )

2000:

Fantasia 2000 ( )

The Ultimative Christmas Present ( )

Phantom of the Megaplex ( )

Mom's Got a Date with a Vampire ( )

The Other Me ( )

Quints ( )

Ready to Run ( )

Stepsister from Planet Weird ( )

Miracle in Lane 2 ( )

Rip Girls ( )

Alley Cats Strike ( )

The Color of Friendship ( )

Up, Up and Away ( )

Angels in the Infield ( )

Air Bud 3 ( )

Mail to the Chief ( )

Geppetto ( )

The Tigger Movie ( )

Dinosaur (X)

Disney's The Kid ( )

Remember the Titans ( )

102 Dalmatians (X)

The Emperor's New Groove (X)

An Extremly Goofy Movie ( )

Whispers: An Elephant Tale ( )

The Little Mermaid 2: Return to the Sea (X)

Buzz Lightyear of Star Command ( )

Life-Size ( )

The Miracle Worker ( )

Bounce ( )

Jett Jackson: The Movie ( )

The Other Side of Heaven ( )

`Twas the Night ( )

Halloweentown 2: Kalabar's Revenge ( )

The Poof Point ( )

Jumping Ship ( )

Jennie ( )

Hounded ( )

Luck of the Irish ( )

Zenon: The Zequel ( )

Mickey's Magical Christmas: Snowed in at the House of Mouse ( )

Motocrossed ( )

Recess: School's Out ( )

Lady and the Tramp 2 – Scamp's Adventure (X)

Atlantis: The Lost Empire (X)

The Princess Diaries ( )

Max Keebles Big Move ( )

Monsters, Inc (X)

Princess of Thieves ( )

Air Bud 4 ( )

The Scream Team ( )

A Ring of Endless Light ( )

Gotta Kick It Up! ( )

Get a Clue ( )

Tru>> confessions ( )

Cadet Kelly ( )

Double Teamed ( )

Snow Dogs (X)

Return to Neverland (X)

The Rookie ( )

Cinderella 2: Dreams Come True (X)

Lilo & Stitch (X)

The Country Bears ( )

Tuck Everlasting ( )

The Santa Clause 2 ( )

Treasure Planet (X)

Winnie the Pooh: A Very Merry Pooh Year ( )

The Hunchback of Notre Dame 2 ( )

Tarzan & Jane ( )

Mickey's House of Villains ( )

Kim Possible: A Sitch in Time ( )

Air Bud 5 ( )

Full Court Miracle ( )

The Cheetah Girls ( )

Eddies Million Dollar Cook-Off ( )

The Even Stevens Movie ( )

Right on Track ( )

You Wish! ( )

101 Dalmatians 2: Patch's London Adventure ( )

The Jungle Book 2 (X)

Inspector Gadget 2 ( )

Piglet's Big Movie ( )

Ghosts of the Abyss ( )

Holes ( )

Atlantis: Milo's Return (X)

The Lizzie McGuire Movie ( )

Finding Nemo (X)

Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl (X)

Freaky Friday ( )

Brother Bear (X)

George of the Jungle 2 ( )

The Haunted Mansion (X)

The Young Black Stallion ( )

Stitch! The Movie ( )

Recess ( )

Recess: All Growed Down ( )

Going to the Mat ( )

Pixel Perfect ( )

Zenon Z3 ( )

Halloweentown High ( )

Tiger Cruise ( )

Stuck in the Suburbs ( )

Teacher's Pet ( )

Miracle ( )

March of the Penguins ( )

Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen ( )

Ghost in the Shell 2 – Innocence ( )

Home on the Range (X)

Sacred Planet ( )

Springtime with Roo ( )

Around the World in 80 Days (X)

America's Heart and Soul ( )

The Princess Diaries 2: Royal Engagement ( )

Mulan 2 (X)

The Incredibles (X)

Mickey's Twice Upon a Christmas (X)

The Lion King 1½ (X)

National Treasure ( )

Mickey, Donald and Goofy: The Three Musketeers (X)

Aliens of the Deep ( )

The Three Musketeers ( )

Kronk's New Groove ( )

Once Upon a Mattress ( )

Kim Possible Movie – So the Drama ( )

Go Figure ( )

Life is Ruff ( )

The Proud Family Movie ( )

Twitches ( )

Lilo & Stitch 2: Stitch Has a Glitch (X)

Pooh's Heffalump Movie ( )

The Pacifier ( )

Ice Princess ( )

Herbie: Fully Loaded ( )

Sky High ( )

Valiant ( )

The Greatest Game Ever Played ( )

Pooh's Heffalump Halloween Movie ( )

Now You See It ( )

Buffalo Dreams ( )

Chicken Little ( )

The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe (X)

Tarzan 2 (X)

The Muppet's Wizard of Oz ( )

Air Buddies ( )

Read It and Weep ( )

Wendy Wu – Homecoming Warrior ( )

Cow Belles ( )

The Cheetah Girls 2 ( )

Return to Halloweentown ( )

High School Musical ( )

Brother Bear 2 ( )

Glory Road ( )

Roving Mars ( )

Bambi 2 (X)

Eight Below (X)

The Shaggy Dog ( )

The Wild ( )

Cars ( )

Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest (X)

Leroy & Stitch ( )

Invincible ( )

The Santa Clause 3: The Escape Clause ( )

Bridge to Terabithia ( )

Johnny Kapahala – Back on Board ( )

Jump In! ( )

Meet the Robinsons ( )

Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End ( )

Ratatouille ( )

Underdog ( )

The Pixar Story ( )

The Game Plan ( )

Le Premier Cri ( )

Enchanted ( )

The Fox and the Hound 2 (X)

The Secret of the Magic Gourd ( )

Pooh's Super Sleuth Christmas Movie ( )

Twitches Too ( )

High School Musical 2 ( )

Cinderella 3: A Twist in Time (X)

National Treasure: Book of Secrets ( )

Hannah Montana and Miley Cyrus: Best of Both Worlds Concert ( )

Snow Buddies ( )

The Cheetah Girls 3: One World ( )

The Little Mermaid – Ariel's Beginning (X)

Tinkerbell (X)

Camp Rock ( )

Minutemen ( )

College Road Trip ( )

The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian ( )

Dasavathaaram ( )

WALL-E ( )

Beverly Hills Chihuahu ( )

Morning Light ( )

High School Musical 3: Senior Year ( )

Bolt (X)

Bedtime Stories ( )

Jonas Brothers: The 3D Concert Experience ( )

Iron Man ( )

Race to Witch Mountain ( )

Hannah Montana: The Movie ( )

Earth ( )

The Incredible Hulk ( )

Trail of the Panda ( )

Up ( )

Lilly the Witch: The Dragon and the Magic Book ( )

G-Force ( )

Walt & El Grupo ( )

The Book of Masters ( )

Wizards of Waverly Place: The Movie ( )

Santa Buddies Here Comes Santa Paws ( )

Disney's A Christmas Carol ( )

Tinkerbell and the Lost Treasure (X)

Old Dogs ( )

Princess Protection Program ( )

The Princess and the Frog ( )

Tigger & Pooh and a Musical Too ( )

Hatching Pete ( )

Dadnapped ( )

Space Buddies ( )

2010:

Alice in Wonderland (X)

Waking Sleeping Beauty ( )

Oceans ( )

Santa Paws ( )

Avalon High ( )

Den Brother ( )

Camp Rock 2: The Final Jam ( )

Tinkerbell and the Great Fairy Rescue (X)

StarStruck ( )

Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time ( )

Toy Story 3 ( )

You Again ( )

The Sorcerer's Apprentice ( )

The Crimson Wing: Mystery of the Flamingos ( )

Secretariat ( )

Do Dooni Chaar ( )

Tangled ( )

The Boys: The Sherman Brothers' Story ( )

Tron: Legacy ( )

Iron Man 2 ( )

Geek Charming ( )

Good Luck Charlie, It's Christmas! ( )

Phineas & Ferb – The Movie ( )

Spooky Buddies ( )

Anaganaga O Dheerudu ( )

The Suite Life Movie ( )

Sharpay's Fabulous Adventure ( )

Lemonade Mouth ( )

Beverly Hills Chihuahua 2 ( )

Thor ( )

Lilly the Witch: The Journey to Mandolan ( )

Mars Needs Moms ( )

Zokkomon ( )

African Cats ( )

Prom ( )

Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides ( )

Cars 2 ( )

Winnie the Pooh ( )

Pixie Hollow Games (X)

The Muppets ( )

Girl vs. Monster ( )

Santa Paws 2 ( )

Sofia the First: Once Upon a Princess ( )

Radio Rebel ( )

Beverly Hills Chihuahua 3 ( )

Treasure Buddies ( )

FRenemies ( )

John Carter ( )

Chimpanzee ( )

Arjun: The Warrior Prince ( )

Brave ( )

The Odd Life of Timothy Green ( )

Frankenweenie ( )

Let It Shine ( )

Secret of the Wings (X)

The Advengers ( )

Wreck-It Ralph ( )

Teen Beach Movie ( )

Super Buddies

Oz the Great and Powerful ( )

Wings of Life ( )

Monsters University ( )

The Lone Ranger ( )

Planes ( )

Frozen ( )

Saving Mr. Banks ( )

Iron Man 3 ( )

Thor: The Dark World ( )

How to Build a Better Boy ( )

Zapped ( )

Cloud 9 ( )

The Pirate Fairy (X)

Muppets Most Wanted ( )

Bears ( )

Million Dollar Arm ( )

Maleficent ( )

Planes: Fire & Rescue ( )

Khoobsurat ( )

Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day ()

Captain America: The Winter Soldier ( )

Guardians of the Galaxy ( )

Big Hero 6 (X)

Into the Woods ( )

McFarland USA ( )

Cinderella ( )

Monkey Kingdom ( )

Tomorrowland ( )

Inside Out ( )

ABCD 2 ( )

Ant-Man ( )

The Good Dinosaur ( )

Star Wars: The Force Awakens (X)

Teen Beach 2 ( )

Tinkerbell and the Legend of the NeverBeast (X)

Bad Hair Day ( )

Descendants ( )

Avengers: Age of Ultron ( )

The Finest Hours ( )

Zootopia (X)

The Jungle Book ( )

Tini: The Movie ( )

Alice Through the Looking Glass ( )

Finding Dory ( )

BFG ( )

Pete's Dragon ( )

Queen of Katwe ( )

Moana (X)

Captain America: Civil War ( )

Doctor Strange ( )

Rogue One. A Star Wars Story (X)

Growing Up Wild ( )

Dangal ( )

L'Empereur – March of the Penguins 2: The Next Step ( )

Beauty and the Beast ( )

Born in China ( )

Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales ( )

Cars 3 ( )

Ghost of the Mountains ( )

Jagga Jasoos ( )

Coco ( )

Lillys Bewitched Christmas ( )

Descendants 2 ( )

Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 ( )

Spider Man: Homecoming ( )

Thor: Ragnarok ( )

Star Wars: The Last Jedi (X)

Expedition China ( )

A Wrinkle in Time ( )

The Incredibles 2 ( )

Christoper Robin ( )

The Nutcracker and the Four Realms ( )

Ralph Breaks the Internet ( )

Mary Poppins Returns ( )

Zombies ( )

Black Panther ( )

Avengers: Infinity War ( )

Solo: A Star Wars Story ( )

Ant-Man and the Wasp ( )

Dumbo ( )

Penguins ( )

Aladdin ( )

Toy Stor 4 ( )

The Lion King ( )

Maleficent: Mistress of Evil ( )

Lady and the Tramp ( )

Noelle ( )

Frozen 2 ( )

Descendants 3 ( )

Captain Marvel ( )

Avengers: End Game ( )

Spider-Man: Far From Home ( )

Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker ( )

One Day at Disney ( )

Togo ( )

2020:

Timmy Failure: Mistakes Were Made ( )

Onward ( )

Stargirl ( )

Dolphin Reef ( )

Elephant ( )

Artemis Fowl ( )

Hamilton ( )

Mulan ( )

The One and Only Ivan ( )

The Beatles: Get Back ( )

Soul ( )

Secret Society of Second-Born Royals ( )

Magic Camp ( )

Howard ( )

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theasstour · 5 years

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0104. Allegro di molto.

Tuesday, 4 November 2014

FIC PAGE | CHAPTER SYMPHONY | WORD COUNT: 7.1k

NB: explicit language, the doctor lol

VOTE FOR SOY HERE💞

Becky groaned. “Someone stole some of my butter again.” She looked down into the open carton, a disgusted expression on her face. “There’s crumbs in it.”

“Bloody Ian again, I tell you.” Tiana said from her position by the kitchen table, eating her bowl of cereal.

“Minging.” Becky threw her butter away, taking her phone out to message the groupchat to complain, something Y/N thought Becky was rather good at. All the girls sat in the kitchen eating breakfast together, none in much of a hurry. Y/N was sitting by the window, watching a cat walk over the grass between house three and house five, chewing on a slice of toast with pâté, a glass of apple juice beside her. Annie – who was sitting next to Y/N – was done eating, and Tiana – sitting opposite Y/N – was still eating her cereal. It was quiet, no music blaring from Ian’s room and Finn, who seemed to have mates over, weren’t being as loud as he usually was. Calm, Y/N thought, leaning her head against the wall and taking another bite of her bread.

“By the way,” Becky said, crossing her arms and sighing dramatically. “Did you guys hear Harry Styles got lucky last Friday?”

Tiana gasped, face turning into an instant and interested grin. She loved gossip.

“Yea,” Becky nodded, looking almost offended. “He was snogging someone in the kitchen Molly said.”

“Molly who?”

“Jones, she’s a course mate of mine.” Becky explained. “Anyway, she saw him snogging someone in the kitchen, looking all fit in all black. She didn’t see her face.”

Tiana poked her bottom lip out, clearly sorry for Becky. For some reason, Y/N didn’t really know what to make of this. Harry had obviously been very drunk last Friday, and she wasn’t one to judge people, but she could not for the life of her understand why Becky would want to shag Harry when he was so plainly legless. Through all of this conversation, Y/N brought her glass up to take a sip of her apple juice, ignoring the tinge of curiosity inside her that screamed at her to find out who Harry had been making out with.

“Heard he shagged someone in the bathroom as well.” Tiana mumbled, making Becky groan.

“Why are men pigs?” She asked no one in particular, stomping her foot. “I mean,” she rolled her eyes. “Good for him, I guess, I just wish it had been me.”

“And so do we, babes, but your time will come and he’ll not be able to keep his hands off you.” Tiana reassured Becky, making her giggle. “How are you all liking your course so far, by the way?” Tiana asked, drinking the remainder of milk left in her bowl.

“Good.” Becky said, getting some apple juice from the fridge. “Thought some of the modules on Psychology sounded boring at first, but now it’s really fun. I love it.”

“That’s so nice!” Tiana smiled. “I’m really enjoying uni so far. It’s weird, I never pictured myself going to uni, but now I’m here and I’m really enjoying it. It feels like I just know what to do with my life now.” Tiana twirled a lock of hair around her index finger. “Which is very nice.”

Y/N, putting her glass down after having taken a sip, cleared her throat when Tiana looked at her. “It’s okay. I’m stressed out all the time, but I think that’s a part of it.”

“Oh, me too!” Becky groaned. “We have this essay due next week,” Becky gestured at Annie who was taking the same course, though Annie seemed to be somewhere else entirely. “And just choosing an essay question is stressing me out. I don’t even know how to choose one or how to research.”

“That’ll come naturally, like we’ll write so many essays our time here so when it comes to your dissertation your final year, you’ll know what to do.” Tiana reassured Becky, getting up and walking to the sink to clean her bowl. “I handed in my second essay yesterday, and just thinking about it makes me want to literally be sick.”

“An it’s such a big uni as well, so the lecturers aren’t as familiar with you or helpful as the were in Sixth Form.” Becky sighed. “I’m just scared I’m going to fuck it up.”

“You won’t.” Tiana said.

The two girls continued to talk while Y/N’s eyes landed on Annie, who hadn’t said a word. Not really knowing what to do in a situation like this one, Y/N only stared at her flatmate, unsure of what were the right words to say and scared of uttering the wrong ones. She took another bite of her toast, racking her brain for something to say to Annie, for something to get an easy conversation going between the two. But Y/N was lost of ideas this early in the morning, empty of anything resembling social skills. So, swallowing her toast, she looked down at her plate, noting how many crumbs hand landed on and around it. Suddenly, the sound of the kitchen door opening sounded, and Becky and Tiana’s conversation were brought to an abrupt stop. Y/N knew it would be one of the boys, most likely Ian who were late for yet another lecture. Y/N wondered how it was possible for someone to be that lazy, so unorganised that it was hard to show up on time for anything. Grabbing her glass, she took a long sip until she had emptied it, then put it back on the table.

“Which cupboard is Finn’s?”

Y/N’s eyes shot up. Heart racing, she saw the one and only Harry Styles standing by the door into their kitchen, letting the door fall shut behind him. He was wearing his glasses, hair as tousled as usual, a tight fitted white tee shirt on along with some beige trousers that were hooked to some brown suspenders. Trousers rolled up, his ankles showed, and a pair of taupe grey lace-ups covered his feet, making everything about him seem relaxed but very classy at the same time. Y/N had not imagined Harry to show up, and did not for the life of her know how to react. Were they friends? Should she give him a smile? Or was that too much? Should she ignore him and whip her phone out? Or would that be rude? Y/N was suddenly a little too aware of everything about herself. From the cream roll neck boxy jumper, to the black and yellow grid check trousers and white panelled curved sole trainers. For some reason, she drew a hand through her hair, hopefully looking a little more refreshed. She hadn’t even had the time to do her make-up yet. Why did he have to show up now? Of all times, now?

“That one.” Becky said, pointing to the one closest to the kitchen table and where Y/N and Annie were sitting.

“Cheers.” Harry started walking over to the cupboard, a slow smile stretching out across his lips as his eyes fell on Y/N. Biting her bottom lip, she watched as he walked closer, noticing the sway of his hips and the effortless beauty of him. She hated that she noticed these things about him because… well, he was annoying. So, for him to be unbelievably peng and at the same time make her want to drag all her fingernails out in frustration, to say she hated him for it would be to put it almost mildly.

Y/N drew her eyes away from him to see Becky’s mouth wide open and Tiana smile at her. Fanning herself, Becky made Tiana laugh and the two girls mouthed words to each other that Y/N could barely make out. Though she could read ‘fucking hell’ and ‘sexy’ when she saw it. As her eyes met Harry’s again, she saw he was already staring at her from the cupboard, the door open and yet to reach in and take a glass. Amusement reached his eyes and the tips of his lips as they twitched into an involuntary smile. Y/N noticed then, on the inside of his right arm, down from the inside of his elbow and down to his wrist, were a list of numbers. In a typewriter font, the list was long, some numbers with dots between them, and others standing alone. Y/N couldn’t help but wonder what the numbers stood for, what the meaning behind his tattoos was. His skin was bare besides those numbers, which meant, at least in Y/N’s head, that they had to be of some type of value to him. Only when Y/N looked at him did he get the glass he needed, closing the cupboard before he walked over to Becky and Tiana by the sink. His back was muscular, you could see his shoulder blades stretch against the fabric of the shirt, his shoulder so broad Y/N was wondering how often he worked out to maintain the build he had.

“Sorry, ladies.” Harry said, filling the glass with cold water before he walked over to lean against one of the fridges. Their eyes met again, and Harry smiled that lopsided beam of his, making Y/N blush. God, she hated him. He made her all… all… blushy. The door opened again, and this time Finn walked in with two other friends following him.

“Ahh, see you found me cupboard.” Finn said, giving Harry’s shoulder a slap before he opened on of the fridges and got a yogurt out. “Everybody,” he announced as he turned around from the fridge, looking at the girls of his flat. “You’ve already met Wade,” Finn gestured at the familiar face, and Y/N gave him a little smile when their eyes met. “And this is Sai, he’s one of Harry’s course mates, and he’s absolutely bloody insane.”

“I am.” Sai agreed, nodding his head. He was of Indian descent, Y/N noted, with dark hair, a slight beard and tall figure. Sai was the tallest of the gang, an easy grace about him that the others lacked. He was very charismatic, very charming, and it was hard to take your eyes off of him once you had recognised his beauty. Just like Harry, Y/N thought to herself. What?! No! Stop that! Jesus Christ! She ran a hand through her hair, eyes falling to Harry who was already looking at her, holding his glass of water to his chest. A curl had fallen in front of his glasses and he whipped it out of the way, chin tipped upward as that smug smile formed across his face, clearly liking when Y/N was looking at him. She looked away and at Finn.

Finn walked over to the table to sit down beside Annie, the rest of his gang following. Instant panic rose in Y/N’s chest as Harry walked to her side and sat down, putting his glass down on the table beside hers. His knee was just barely not touching hers, his elbow so close to her that she didn’t properly know how to breathe without coughing. Y/N didn’t hear a word of what Finn was saying, but it must’ve been something funny as all the boys laughed and so did Becky and Tiana who was standing beside the table. Y/N felt a little out of place, the whole situation overwhelming her as the only thing she could focus on was how the presence of Harry’s knee so close to hers sent a shiver of something up her spine. All she could think about was their last interaction at the Halloween party last Friday. How Harry’s pink lips had formed out the words she had chosen not to utter her whole life for a reason unknown to her. How good it sounded leaving his lips. How low the octave of his voice had been as he let his front teeth part from his bottom lip long enough to take her breath away. Y/N stared straight ahead as Annie who stared back at her, raising her eyebrows in question.

“Fuck.”

Y/N shoved away from the table, pushing the chair in and taking her plate and glass. Sai was talking and didn’t stop as Y/N walked over to the sink, pushing her sleeves up her arms before running water over her used kitchenware. It was hard not to look to her right and over at the table, see if Harry had even noticed her leaving, to see his reaction. But she bit her tongue and let herself focus on the task at hand, not letting the thought of Harry bloody Styles make her give in to stupid actions. Once she was done, she dried her plate and glass and put them both back in her cupboard, pushing the sleeved of her cream jumper down. Looking back at the table Y/N saw Becky sit down in her seat, giving Harry a smile as she did so. He returned it, and before he got to engage in the discussion about which café in Clapham they’d go chill at today, Becky was taking to him. She made him smile and Y/N bit her lip, not really knowing what she expected. Crossing her arms, she gave Tiana who was staring at her a smile, and then she walked to her room, being careful not to let the door slam behind her as she went.

“Try it again.” Teresa urged, giving Y/N an encouraging smile. The two were in one of the study rooms in the Arts building, rehearsing for their exam in exactly one month. Goddard had sent everyone off to go rehearse on their own, him sitting in their classroom if anyone needed help with anything. Y/N and Teresa had quickly ran off to find a study room where they could practise in peace and quiet. Y/N had listened to Teresa sing first, a beautiful cover of Hand of God by Jon Bellion that took Y/N’s breath away. And now it was Y/N’s turn. She had messed it up a few times already, the sheer nervousness of someone listening to her play taking over. Caprice No. 24 stood on a music sheet in front of Y/N, and she already regretted picking this piece. Niccolo Paganini was known for his Caprices, creating some of the hardest solo violin pieces to play. But Y/N wanted to impress her tutor. And to make herself proud.

Slowly, Y/N brought the violin up, resting it to her chin, and closing her eyes before bringing the bow up as she straightened her back. She started playing the piece, eyes shut, and heart filled with determination. She wanted – needed – to get it right, to know that she was capable to playing such a complicated and beautiful solo. Only opening her eyes to glue them to the music sheet before her, Y/N tried to forget where she was, what she was doing, and why she was doing it. Playing the violin usually calmed her; brought her to an instant state of belonging that she didn’t feel anyplace, anytime, anywhere but when she played the violin. It was weird how this simple action of playing music could bring her to a place so peaceful and euphoric, how the sound of the violin was her home. Her fingers glided over the strings, holding onto the neck so hard it started hurting her fingers.

And as quickly as she had disappeared off to the place of concentration and peace, Y/N lost it. She failed to hit a note, and once she started being slow and not hitting them, the rest followed. Groaning, Y/N lowered her violin and let her head slump against her chest, feeling so disappointed in herself that it was hard not to cry. Teresa didn’t say a word, just looked at Y/N as she tried to calm herself down, already knowing that there was no way she could comfort her new friend without accidentally making it worse. She just had to practise, day and night for another month, and she would know Caprice No. 24 inside and out. And that was really as she could do, because if she wanted to impress Goddard and get a first on this assignment and module, then she would have to nail it December 9th.

Teresa got up from her chair, putting her book into her rucksack. “Seminar is over in 5, wanna head out?”

Y/N nodded, putting her violin away in its case. She draped her navy puffer jacket on, a dark grey scarf around her neck, hauled the violin case onto her back and through both her arms like a rucksack, and put her natural cotton carrier with all her books and notebooks on her shoulder before the two walked out. Y/N excused herself to the loo and Teresa promised she’d text Y/N her library plans this weekend so they could head in together. The two friends parted ways and Y/N walked to the loo, dragging both her hands frustratingly through her hair. It was one thing to mess up a solo by yourself in your room, but doing it multiple times in front of someone else? Friends or not, Y/N was embarrassed Teresa had witnessed it, though she knew Teresa would never hold it against her or think her untalented, she still felt mad at herself. Once she was done in the loo, Y/N looked at herself in the mirror, staring herself down. A feeling of not belonging flooded her, like maybe she wasn’t doing the right course. Maybe she had done wrong applying and going to university, because she was clearly not good enough to play a single solo in front of one single friend. If she ever had hopes of playing in an orchestra, she would have to finish uni, but how would she do that when she could barely get through her first semester?

Tightening her scarf so it would shelter her from the harsh autumn winds outside, Y/N got her leather gloves out, putting them on before she exited the toilet. She walked through the corridor of seminar and lectures rooms, looking in through some of them while hooking her thumb through the straps of her violin case. She felt distant from everything, like maybe she should be home on Picot Farm tending to the Christmas trees her father would ship out to different parts of Hampshire and London soon. Maybe this wasn’t the place for her after all. Maybe she had been wrong.

“Y/N.”

She stopped in her tracks halfway through the huge foyer of the Antonin Artaud Building at the sound of a very familiar voice she had last heard this morning. Leaning by the wall leading into the corridor she had just walked out of, the same corridor she had her seminar every Tuesday, Harry stood. He wasn’t waring his glasses anymore, and the black Borg lined denim jacket with a brown cardigan underneath looked very cosy and comfortable. His suspenders and white tee shirt were visible, making Y/N instantly think back to this morning and how utterly at loss for words she had been at seeing him in her flat. Hands in the pockets of his jacket, Harry pushed away from the wall and walked over to her, the left side of his mouth tipping upward.

“Harry.” Y/N said, a little out of breath. “What are you doing here? Did you come with Finn?”

Harry let out a short chuckle, eyes falling to the ground between them before he looked up at her through his dark eyelashes. “No.”

“No?”

“Finn, Wade and Sai are still in Clapham. Came back because I know where you have your seminar on Tuesdays.”

Y/N blinked. “You… know where I have my seminars on Tuesdays?”

“Only on Tuesdays because that’s when I’ve seen you walk out of the same room Finn walks into.” Harry explained further, giving Y/N another smile. “You seem shocked. Are you creeped out by me yet?”

“I don’t know.” Y/N admitted, narrowing her eyes. “You’re so confusing to me.”

Harry raised his eyebrows, smile growing wider. “Am I now?”

“Yea, so confusing.” Y/N faced him head on. “One second you’re all quiet and don’t really care about anyone or anything. The next you show up in my kitchen early in the morning not even saying a single word to me. And then you show up outside the room I have my seminar ‘because that’s where you’ve seen me walk out of the same room Finn walks into’.”

“So, what you’re saying is you don’t get me?”

“Not at all.”

“Maybe you would start to if you gave me your number?”

Y/N was so dumfounded she found herself taking a step back. Never had anyone ever been this blunt and straight-forward with her before, and she wasn’t sure if she really liked it or wanted to ask what was wrong with him. But Harry just smiled at her, a dimple in his left cheek increasing in visibility as the silence stretched on between them. People were milling about, a quiet hum of voices rose around them, but Y/N couldn’t make out what any of them were saying or trying to get across because all she could think about was Harry before her. Harry; who she could not get a good grip of. Harry; who seemed cold one minute, but the next would turn around and give you one of those dimpled smiles. Y/N couldn’t pin point him, couldn’t point to one specific stereotype of men or characteristic and say that was Harry. Because everything about him kept surprising her.

“You’re thinking long and hard about this.” Harry said, chuckling. “Like to keep a lad waiting, ey?”

“Why do you want my number?”

Harry shrugged his shoulders. “It’s fine if you don’t want to give it to me. Might break my heart a little, but it’s your choice, darling.”

“I’ll give it to you on one condition.” Y/N said, taking her gloves off to type her number into Harry’s phone. He smiled, getting his phone out of his jacket pocket.

“Anything.”

“Please don’t spam my phones with texts.”

Harry laughed, giving her his iPhone and watched as she punched her number into it.

“Fine,” Harry said. “Only if you please, for the love of God, don’t send me nudes.”

Y/N huffed, handing him his phone before taking her gloves back on.

“I know it’s going to be hard to resist, but please-“

“-Don’t you worry.” Y/N gave him a smile. “I won’t. I’m just scared you’re actually going to start texting me now. Like we’re friends.”

“You fucking wish.” Harry said, snickering.

“Wish you’d text me? No thanks, don’t want to talk to you more than absolutely necessary.” Y/N bit her lip, crossing her arms as she watched him write her name out as the contact name and then put his phone away in his pocket. Staring up at her, Harry looked so smug, like he had won again, and Y/N supposed he had. She had given in and given hi her number, hadn’t she?

“Heard you got lucky last Friday.”

It came out of Y/N before she was even registering what she was saying. Biting her lips together, she looked at Harry with her heart beating in her ears and mortification swimming along every veins of her body. You idiot. You absolute headless-

“What?” Harry frowned, sounding genuinely confused.

“You-“ Y/N stopped herself, clearing her throat as she found herself very uncomfortable talking about this. “You got some.”

“I did?” Harry put his hands on his hips, exhaling loudly. “If I did then I don’t remember much of it, which is a bloody shame, innit?”

Y/N frowned. “Becky said Molly told her she saw you snogging a girl in the kitchen and then heard you have a round in the bathroom.”

Harry laughed, throwing his head back and looking so confused and giddy Y/N couldn’t help but smile through her disoriented state. “The only girl I was with in the kitchen last Friday was you.” He said joyfully, eyes hidden behind his high cheekbones as he obviously found this all very funny. “And as for a round in the bathroom… I pissed in the back garden once and deeply regret it. Not something a Law student should be doing, is it?”

Y/N shifted her weight from one foot to the other, scratching at her jaw like she usually did when she didn’t really know what to say.

“And that was the only time I really went to the loo during that house party, am I afraid.” He explained, looking disgustingly satisfied with himself. “Seems like you’re my mystery girl, but don’t worry, I won’t tell anyone.”

“You study Law?” Y/N bit her lips together again, not knowing where all these questions were coming from and why she was so good at finding the most awkward way to ask them. He just told you all of this, and that’s what you end up wondering about? You absolute puff, Y/N thought to herself, hoping he didn’t find her too weird for changing the subject. Though he probably does, he most likely thinks I’m weird. Oh God, oh God.

Harry let out a single chuckle. “European Legal Studies.”

“And you didn’t shag someone last Friday?”

Harry shook his head. “Complete tosh. Was with me mates and on one occasion I talked to a mystery girl dressed as a vampire in the kitchen, but that’s about it, really.”

Y/N couldn’t help her smile, and it seemed at the sight of it, Harry started smiling a little wider as well. “Hope you find that mystery girl of yours. Sounds like you have a Cinderella situation on your hands.”

Harry’s teeth showed and he chuckled. “Believe me, no one hopes I find her more than I do.”

Y/N looked down at the time on her phone, having planned a FaceTime date with Edward for when she got home from her seminar. She hated to keep him waiting.

“Say… if I asked the mystery girl out for a coffee at the Costa across campus next Friday at 5, do you think she would be up for it?”

Y/N looked up at Harry so fast she felt a pull in her neck. He was smiling at her still, seemingly knowing the exact effect he had on her, which made her wish he didn’t have said effect because it would make everything so much easier. Raising his eyebrows, Harry urged her to answer, to tell her if she was free or not. Y/N opened her mouth, then closed it again. Opened it; closed it. Was he asking her out on a date? Or was this making plans with a friend? She simply could not tell. No one had ever asked her out before. Not like this at least, and she felt her heart quicken a little too quickly at the thought.

“Yes.” Y/N said, voice low.

“Wicked.” Harry smiled, shoving his hands into his jacket pockets. “Sick. Can’t wait to meet her again.”

Y/N smiled back, not wanting for Harry to see just how much she was looking forward to it as well, so she turned around and started walking away. Mouthing an oh my God to herself on her way to the exit, Y/N fisted her hands into balls to contain herself until she at least was out of sight of Harry.

“Y/N!”

She stopped, looked over her shoulder at him.

He motioned at the violin case on her back. “Will I ever hear you play?”

She smiled. “In your dreams.”

“But you’re already there,” he said, grinning. “Playing the violin.”

Y/N huffed, rolling her eyes at him. “God, I hope not.”

But she really did. And she couldn’t help but smile a little too wide as she walked off, hearing Harry laugh behind her.

Edward never took long to pick up his phone, that was just a fact of life. Whenever someone called him, they could expect him to answer within the first three rings. He loved talking, loved being around people and having everyone’s eyes on him, which was so different to Y/N’s character who hated beyond anything to have people pay attention to her. She rarely answered her phone unless it was someone she knew very well, and the only person she ever really called was Eddie. She was laid in her bed now, having changed into lounge wear, and snuggled under a blanket, phone in hand. Edward answered the FaceTime call rather quickly, beaming at his phone when he saw Y/N’s face.

“Goose!”

“Hi, Maverick, you alright?”

“Mum’s making tikka masala for dinner, I’m splendid.” Edward said, putting his phone on his lap as he rolled himself away from the kitchen and into the living room where he wouldn’t be disturbed by all the noises their mum were creating making dinner. “How was the seminar?”

“Medium. We got to rehearse for the exam, but I suck at my Caprice so far.”

“Doubt that. Why would you say you suck?”

“Because I pissed it, Eddie. I always mess it up when I play it.” Y/N looked away from the phone, feeling ashamed to admit that she was having trouble, but at the same time relieved to put words to it and tell someone. Besides, Edward always listened, knowing her better than she knew herself and he always found the right words to say to calm her down.

Edward gave the phone a smile a she picked it back up again. “When’s the exam?”

“December 9th.”

“Then you got plenty of time, Y/N. Don’t fret too much, you’ll find a way to play it flawlessly and your lecturer will be blown away, I promise.”

Y/N smiled, nodding at her brother. “How was the doctor?”

When Y/N lived at home, she would accompany Edward to a hospital in Oxford where he went once a month to check up on his back. Because of his serious condition of spina bifida, the doctors wanted to check on his spine every month to make sure he didn’t have any infections because if he did, then everything would turn bad very quick. An infection in his spine would be fatal and so dangerous that he would have to live at the hospital until said infection was gone. He could die if he had an infection. And so, Y/N had always come with him because if her brother was going to be told he had an infection in his spine, then she wanted to be there to ask the doctors all kinds of questions about further treatment and so forth. But she hadn’t come with him in October, and neither had she in November, though she was really hoping she could tag along when she went home for Christmas in a month.

“Okay.” Eddie answered, shrugging. “Not as fun as when you come with, though.”

“Obviously.”

Edward giggled.

“Did you wear the necklace?”

Edward nodded, showing Y/N the silver necklace around his neck. When he was 10 and Y/N 12, the two had gone to the monthly check up, their dad tagging along, of course. And ever since Y/N could remember, this one woman had helped Edward out and been his doctor. Her name had been Claudia Parr, a blonde woman with the warmest smile Y/N had ever seen and a way with Edward that was incredible. Treating him like porcelain and with respect, Claudia had always made Edward and Y/N’s trips to Oxford amazing. But there had been this one time when Edward’s back had hurt him more than usual, and he had been so terrified of having an infection that his 10-year-old self started crying on the check-up table. Claudia had unhooked that necklace from around her neck and given it to Edward, told him that it had always brought her luck and now it would do the same for him. He didn’t have an infection. Edward got to keep it, and whenever he saw her after he offered to give it back, but Claudia told him to hold onto it just in case. And some months later Edward got a new doctor for some weird reason that neither him nor Y/N ever got a valid explanation for. After a year, their father told them Claudia had moved to Scotland, and thought both had been devastated, she had left her source of luck behind for Edward to keep, and for that they were forever grateful.

“Yea.” Edward said. “I wore it. Of course I did.”

“Good.” Y/N sighed, sinking into her mountain of pillows. “Now, tell me what the house smells like. I need to remember mum’s tikka.”

Friday, 14 November 2014

Y/N looked at herself in her dodgy mirror for what must have been the 99th time. She wasn’t wearing anything special, just some checked trousers and her navy puffer Y/Net, some make-up on her face and nothing particular done to her hair. Harry had told her not to be a second too late in that one text message he had sent her an hour ago, and now it was 3pm and she was all ready to go to Costa. Two hours before they were actually supposed to meet him. God, she groaned at herself, she was being so unbelievably pathetic. They were just going to chill at Costa like two normal friends usually did. There was nothing special about it. No need to freak out. But in the nature of who she was as a person, Y/N was freaking out. Big time.

She sat down by her desk, urging herself to not see too much into all of this as she would only be let down. And though she was telling herself that, she knew she would look too much into all of this and probably have her heart slightly broken when she found out he only wanted to be friends. She wasn’t even sure she knew what she was feeling for him yet, everything about Harry confused her. About to take her puffer Y/Net off and bring her laptop out and find something to do on there, a knock sounded from Y/N’s door. Opening it, Tiana stood on the other side, wide eyed and hands folded before her.

“I need you to come with me.”

Y/N stared at her for a bit. “Come… with you? Where?”

“To the doctor, I booked an appointment yesterday for today at 5pm.”

“The doctor?” Y/N took a step toward Tiana, panic prickling her fingertips. “What- W-Why? What’s going on?”

“I think I might be pregnant.”

Y/N’s mouth fell open, eyes blinking as she let the shock of it all sink in. “You…” She couldn’t say it, because where she was from, in tiny Hawkley, no one got pregnant until they were at least 30, married and financially stable. This whole situation was so weird to her that Y/N felt a little faint. “Is… is the doctor even open that late on a Friday?”

“This one is.” Tiana said, walking toward her room to get ready to leave. “Can we go there now? I cannot be inside this flat anymore.”

And so they went. Tiana’s arm linked with Y/N’s and silence wrapped around them like a suffocating blanket. Time went by fast and very slow at the same time. The waiting room was too bright, hurting Y/N’s eyes a little, and she tried not to let her eyes wander too much. Tiana was breathing very fast beside her, holding onto Y/N for dear life, and Y/N let her, not really knowing what else she could do for her flatmate besides be there for her. Not really knowing how to manage a situation like this one without handling it the wrong way, making Tiana cry, or just making everyone in the waiting room hate her.

After a long while, Y/N asked Tiana who she thought the father was, to which Tiana huffed very loudly and told her that of course it was Danny’s. And no, she had not told him she was at the doctor’s to check of her two pregnancy tests were indeed telling the truth. Tiana sighed heavily, looking at Y/N.

“Do you think this is stupid? Am I overreacting?”

Y/N could sense it in her voice that she was genuinely scared either were true, that Y/N thought she was these things. So, Y/N shook her head, which was an honest answer.

“You’re not.” Y/N assured her. “You’re scared which is very understandable in a situation like this one. You don’t know what’s going on.”

“Very true.” Tiana agreed. “Maybe a little too true. I have no idea what’s going on, what I’m doing, why I’m doing it, if this is even the right decision, why I haven’t told Danny yet, what if I am pregnant-“

“-Ti.” Y/N took her hand, squeezing it lightly. “Tiana, it’s going to be fine, yea? You’re going to be fine.”

Tiana inhaled slowly, then exhaled. Tears started forming in her eyes, and cocking her head at Y/N, her bottom lip started wobbling. “What am I going to do if I’m pregnant, Y/N? I haven’t even finished my first semester at uni yet, and I’m bloody up the duff.”

“Don’t think about any of that now, okay? Let’s hear what the doctor has to say first, and then you can think about what to do. There is no reason planning a future that might never happen, especially now.” Y/N squeezed Tiana’s hand again. “Especially that one.”

Tiana nodded, knowing full well that her friend was right. “Yea. I need to calm down.”

“Basically.”

“But it’s so hard.”

“Think about something else.” Y/N suggested. “How uni is going. You said it yourself a week ago that you were really enjoying it.”

Tiana started talking about uni, and Y/N knew once she got her chatting, she would not stop. So, nodding every once in a while, and asking follow-up questions, Y/N kept Tiana entertained for at least an hour. Her mind drifted off as Tiana talked as it usually did because she could only focus in on a conversation for so long. There was something so incredibly comforting about being the first person Tiana went to about this problem. She had much more in common with Becky, had hung out more with her over the last few months and Y/N knew she had made loads of course mates, but she had still come knocking on Y/N’s door. Still asked Y/N to come with her. And here they were, holding hands, Y/N comforting her like she knew Tiana would comfort her if there ever was something. For some reason, both girls had a bit of an understanding that they were better friends than their different personalities might tell them. And Y/N felt very special, despite the circumstances, because Tiana wanted her here. As all of this rushed through Y/N’s mind, she gave Tiana’s hand a little squeeze, and her friend returned it with a smile, talking about something Y/N didn’t really know the context of.

The doctor called Tiana in after a little while and the two walked in together, Y/N following Tiana. Y/N zoned out for most of it, knowing that despite Tiana being her friend, this was not her place and she wasn’t about to disrespect her in any way. Tiana walked to the bathroom to do the urine test, coming back a few minutes later and handing the small cylinder to the doctor. As the doctor started talking, Y/N felt her phone vibrate. Getting it out of her pocket, she saw a name she had completely forgotten about in the midst of all of this.

Harry You far away, Miss Winning-at-life?

Oh God. Y/N swallowed thickly, looking up at Tiana as she started talking to the doctor. They were talking about the test results and how they showed Tiana wasn’t pregnant after all. The doctor started asking all kinds of follow-up questions about what made her believe she was pregnant and if she had been having unprotected sex. Y/N’s phone vibrated again.

Harry Y/N?

She couldn’t just storm out, couldn’t tell Tiana she had to leave because whether her friend was pregnant or not, Tiana needed her here. And she might need her later. If it was one thing Y/N was not, then it was disloyal to her friends. Even when she had made plans with Harry a week prior. Tiana needed her, and she wasn’t going to leave her side tonight. So, sighing heavily Y/N started typing out a message to Harry.

Y/N Find myself in a bit of an emergency kind of situation. Another time?

Tiana was thanking the doctor, shaking her hand before taking her coat back on. The appointment was clearly over, Tiana ready to get out of here and back to the flat.

Harry What’s up? You good?

Y/N Yea, something just came up. I’m sorry.

“Jesus fuck.” Tiana groaned as they walked out into the cold London air, buttoning her coat. “I could fly off to heaven now, I’m so relieved.”

Harry But you are good? You’re okay?

“I kind of blocked everything out because it’s your business now mine-“

“-Rubbish, my business is your business, Y/N.” Tiana smiled. “Can we order Domino’s and watch Friends, please? I feel like chilling.”

Y/N smiled, nodding her head. It sounded like a perfect Friday night. Tiana squealed and clapped her hands, groaning once again in relief.

Y/N I’m okay.

“Who are you texting? Saw you on your phone the whole time.” Tiana asked, no accusation in her voice, just curiosity.

“Mum.” Y/N said, watching her breath turn white as it left her mouth.

“Better have had something bloody interesting to say.” Tiana grinned, winking at Y/N who only giggled. “Chuffed to devour a large Domino’s pizza and cookies now. It’s what I deserve.”

While Tiana clicked on the button for the green man to show and them to be able to cross the busy road, Y/N’s phone vibrated for the last time that night.

Harry Then that’s all that matters.

TAGLIST

@swayingnoodlelove @littlestyles @showk1ndness @sydneysuit @hallwayharry @emotionally-imbruised @fuckyeahimahobbit @beksjewels @harryisadogperson @harryrocksagoodsuit @ifiwereaboy2323 @tiostyles @maroonmolly @harrysroguecurl @awomanindeniall @justsaying20 @ot4narrie @miss-nxvxcaine @sunflowersandrockstars @hard-on-harry @emma070900 @shitibitmytonge @my--heroine @rainbowbutterflyboy @shegotthesalt @harrytreatspeoplewithkindnesss @mleestiles @bloodcastle30155 @harryskiwi2 @brielyse11 @for-fucks-sake-h @treat-harry-with-love @permanentllyharry

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#harry styles #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles one shot #harry styles fluff #harry styles fanfic #harry styles smut #harry styles imagine #harry #styles #harry styles angst #harry styles fic #harry styles imagines #het fic #harry styles one shots #PLS DO COME TALK TO ME :DDDDDDD

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tiny-winter-cupcake · 5 years

Text

I long to hear you sing (beneath the clear blue skies)

Summary: “Don’t.”

Phil lowered his hand almost automatically, the voice like melted honey, soft and smooth. He had never heard anything like it, a voice that made him want to fall to his knees and grovel. Phil wanted to worship this creature, worship its voice. It spoke again.

“Come.”

There it was again. That sweet voice. And who was Phil to deny such a sweet request.

Word Count: 7k

Rating: Teen (theres like a bit of unspecified voilence and like, thats it?)

A/N:My @phandombigbang fic, FINALLY. listen i’m super proud of this, and i never thought that I would be able to do this whole thing! a huge shout out to my lovely beta @phinalphantasy7 for putting up all my shit, and to @luisaloveshoney who did the wonderful art HERE. the title is from Marc Anthony’s You Sang To Me. and as always please like and reblog! thank y’all so much!!

Philip Lester, the youngest water witch of the Lester clan, had been living with his family for his whole 31 years of life, and frankly, their old familial home in South Manchester was far too crowded. So naturally, he decided to move out. His family owned a rather nice summer home in Dorset, in a little town called Seaport, named for the large number of water witches that ended up there in the summertime. Much like Phil’s family, all who possessed the kind of abilities associated with the water. Phil could remember taking many family holidays down there, stopping after he went to Uni. Since then, the house had sat unused, and rather than let it go to waste, or worse, be sold, Phil was following his water witch instincts and moving out there. It was strange to leave his parents, but he found that he was oddly happy to move out.

The car ride down to the cottage was long, and by the time Phil reached there, it was well past dinner time, despite leaving after an early brunch. He pulled into the driveway of the cottage and looked at it. Even though it had sat unused for the better part of ten years, the walls were still as white as Phil could remember. The inside, though dusty and filled with cobweb-covered corners, still had its beachy, summer home feel that had made younger Phil and his family feel at ease. It was just as he remembered. He smiled, putting his suitcase down and flopping down into the couch. Looking over at the wood burner, Phil pointed and whispered, “Ignis.” And just like that, a fire started, warming the room almost immediately. Magical fires did that. Phil settled down, before remembering that there were beds upstairs, ones that were probably much more comfortable than this couch. What a pity. The couch seemed heaven compared to the car seat he had been in for the last six hours. The supposed four and a half hours to Seaport took an hour and a half longer than expected, which meant an extra hour and a half in the stupid car more than he had planned for. Phil sighed and closed his eyes. He was just about to drift off when his stomach made an appearance, startling him awake with the echo it made. With a grumble, he got up and trudged to the kitchen.

Thankfully there was no stale food in the kitchen, his family having enough sense to throw away all the perishable foods. There wasn’t much he could eat though, so getting food became his number one priority for tomorrow. For now, Phil would have to settle for the slightly soggy half eaten sandwich he’d gotten at a stop about three hours ago. It tasted like disappointment, but nevertheless, Phil ate it before he went upstairs. He was about to go into his old room when he stopped. He was living here now. He could sleep in what used to be his parents’ room, with their ensuite and all. Phil decided that he wanted to sleep in a big bed, and made his way down the hall to the bedroom. It looked the same as he remembered, with different bedding. He sat down on it with a smile as the memories of sleeping in here when there was a thunderstorm, or when he had watched a scary movie with Martyn, came flooding back. Phil bit his lip, and got up to use the bathroom. Once showered, he made his way over to unpack his suitcase, and fell into bed, utterly exhausted. Needless to say, he slept very well that night.

-------------------

The next morning, Phil was reminded of why his family came here for centuries. The sun streamed in through the windows, golden sunshine that lit up the rooms. It made the bedroom warm, and Phil almost didn’t want to get up. But the rumble in his stomach made him. Yawning, he got out of bed and smiled. For once, he was awoken by his own natural needs instead of people shouting or the neighbors’ babies crying through the walls of the house. Phil got out of bed, stretching as he walked into his bathroom. (He had to keep reminding himself it was his and not his family’s. It was his house now.) A quick shower later, and Phil pulled on a pair of shorts and a teal button up shirt. Perfect. He slipped a pair of shoes on, grabbed his phone and his keys, and headed out.

Standing in the light of day, Phil could really appreciate the house. Thatched roof and all. It was really pretty in the daytime, just around the corner from the high street and right on the beach. A nice village, that had grown a little in Phil’s absence. Small, but pretty. Latching the gate, he tucked his keys into his pocket and walked down the high street.

The village was mostly still familiar. There was the diner, Andersons American, that did the best American style pancakes in the whole of England. Some of the elder residents sat outside, sipping cold waters under the shade of the umbrellas. Across the street, the grocer was outside setting up his fresh produce in the sun. The peacefulness of the main street was disturbed only by the occasional car driving past and the laughter of children floating by as they rushed to the beaches. Police station next to the fire station and the officers gave Phil a nod as he strolled by. There was a kid selling lemonade on the corner of the high street and Beach Road, something Phil remembered doing with his friends so they could buy an ice cream later. Of course, Phil bought a glass, the drink refreshing, cutting the edge off the warm summer air.

There were a few restaurants further down Beach Road, a seafood place Phil remembered from his childhood. As he walked closer to the center of the village, he saw the farmers market surrounded the fountain in the shape of a fish spitting water. People tossed pennies into the fountain, making wishes. There had to be some kind of magic behind it because every wish Phil made in his youth came true. He had had his first kiss on the edge of the fountain, with a local girl named Annie. Annie and her brother, PJ, along with a few other locals and summertime regulars, made up Phil’s friend group during most of his childhood summers.

He walked through the market, seeing some people he used to know and smiling to himself. He had changed quite a lot since he had last been here. But it meant he could more or less fade into the background. He purchased some cheese, bread, and a few different jams from some of the stalls before continuing up the street.

Phil smiled at the memories as they came to him as he passed the church, with the pub (ironically) attached. He had spent many happy hours hanging out upstairs at that pub in the kids’ space with its sofas, pool table, and tv with games consoles. He turned around at the end of the street to walk back down to Beach Road, all the way to the beach itself which was just as pretty as the pictures Phil had kept. The view of the English Channel was stunning, its green-blue waters lapping gently against the shore, leaving smooth pebbles and seashells in its wake.

Phil stood for a moment and admired the long expanse of golden sand before heading back to the grocers to buy food. He walked out fifty pounds poorer, and fifty pounds heavier, it seemed. Thankfully the walk back home was short.

Once in the house, putting things away was quick, and Phil also made quick work of cleaning the house (using magic of course: a simple cleaning spell go rid of the dust and cobwebs and made everything so much nicer) and putting his clothes away. He had a quick bit of toast for breakfast, although it was nearer to lunch now anyway, before he was heading back out to get milk and juice. The shop owner seemed a little surprised to see Phil again, and he smiled sheepishly as he explained he had just moved back to town in his family's house and he needed food and drink quite desperately. The man smiled, saying something about how he remembered that family, and he seemed to recognize Phil, but didn’t say anything if he did. On his way out, however, Phil ran into an old face. Quite literally. The two full-on smacked into each other, causing both to let out a few choice words that made the old lady walking by tut.

“Oh fuck, mate, I’m so sorry,” Phil apologized, rubbing his chin where it had hit the other person’s face. He looked down at the man he had collided with, before asking, “PJ?” PJ was more than startled.

“How do yo-Phil? Phil Lester?” PJ’s face cracked into a smile, and he pulled his old friend into a hug, which was hard on Phil’s end to reciprocate since he was holding a gallon jug of milk and a bag with apple and orange juice cartons inside. PJ didn’t seem to care, he instantly grabbed the milk from Phil and started walking towards his house. Phil laughed, and shook his head, following him.

“What are you doing back here, Phil?” PJ asked once they were settled on Phil’s deck, glasses of apple juice between them. He hadn’t changed much, still tall and lanky. His hair was shorter now, a mop of curls that fell over his kind green eyes. He was still as kind as ever.

“I moved. The family home was getting too crowded, and I wanted a change of scenery. You know my family, loud and rambunctious as ever,” Phil smiled, taking a sip. He really did love his family, but now that his aunt was living with them after her husband’s death, and Martyn was engaged to his girlfriend Cornelia as of last month, not to mention the twins his sister was having, the house was simply too crowded. And that was saying a lot because the family home in Manchester was a seven bedroom, seven and a half bathroom building. But Phil had a few older siblings, and one younger sister, all of whom seemed to be moving back in, rather than leaving like most children did. And Phil just couldn’t stay anymore, not because he didn’t love his family, but because he did need his own space, and it was bad enough he had to give Martyn his room because his fiancee was moving in and Phil’s room was bigger. Here, he was free, and he had his own reputation to make, now that he was all grown up.

“Oh, yeah, I get that. I saw Martyn got engaged, you’ll have to tell him congrats from me and Annie. She got married a few months ago, to Chris of all people. No one saw them falling in love ever happening. They wanted to invite you, but we couldn't find your address. Say, I’ll tell her you’re back, and we can get dinner, get the old gang back together!” PJ grinned, a smile so infectious that Phil started to smile too. He nodded.

“Alright, sounds like a plan. Wish I’d made the move earlier, if it meant coming to the wedding. But I’m glad they put the past behind them,” Phil smiled, and PJ was showing him pictures of the wedding. Of course, he was best man. Chris was like Phil, in more than one way. One, he was a summertime regular, and Phil assumed Chris and Annie were living in his family’s summer house on the other side of town. Two, Chris was a witch, an earthy type, like his mum. As PJ showed Phil the pictures, Phil smiled at how happy they looked, his two childhood best friends. Annie was very much like PJ, long, curly brown hair, an infectious smile, and a glint in those Liguori green eyes. She looked really pretty in the pictures, Phil had to admit. And Chris looked good too, very much in love with his wife. Phil could remember how he teased her, pulled her hair and stuff that little boys did because they were idiots. As they grew up, Chris stopped being such an ass, and one could see the beginnings of a crush when he looked at Annie.

They talked for what seemed like hours, and soon enough PJ was heading out. He was going out to dinner with his family, but promised to text Phil with a date and time for a dinner. Phil smiled, waving him off with a smile. Once gone, he sighed, looking at the dirty cups. With a flick of his wrist, the water turned on and the dishes started to wash themselves. It was honestly his favorite spell, and one that he had learned quite early on to make his chores easier. The dishes even put themselves away, a modification that Phil had added himself. With everything put away, including his clothes, Phil put his shoes back on, and decided to walk to the beach and get dinner, maybe even an ice cream.

After a comforting dinner of fish and chips, Phil walked down the beach with an ice cream in hand, humming softly to himself. He had walked so far down that he was by the caves, an old childhood haunt of his. He was almost done with his ice cream when he heard something. It was faint, and carried a melodic tune. Someone was singing, he realised after a moment. Someone was in the caves, singing. Singing beautifully. Phil felt like he was under some spell, as he got closer. The song was sad, almost eerily so. But Phil kept walking toward it, unable to stop even if he wanted too. He had to find who was singing this song. He was near the entrance of the caves when he was tackled to the ground by something large and very wet. He opened his eyes, having closed them when he was falling, feeling fur under his hands. A dog, a large sheepdog to be specific, was licking at his face. Phil laughed, trying to push him off. At that moment, a wave crashed into them, saltwater going in Phil's mouth and up his nose, making him cough and splutter. Someone pulled the dog off him, and Phil scrambled to his feet, wiping his eyes. He groaned, spitting on the ground as the dog's owner apologised profusely. He waved them off, smiling a little. He needed to change, and wash these clothes before they got stiff. Phil glanced back to the caves, and he swore he saw something move in the darkness. Something ducked behind a rock, and if he hadn’t been covered in grimy, salty water he would have gone to explore, to find out if this was the same person who had been singing.

-------------------

Phil couldn’t sleep that night, his mind thinking about the song, and how beautiful it was. Who, or what, was singing it? And why were they in the caves? There were so many questions he needed answers to, and he resolved to find out in the morning. That thought helped to lull him to a semi-comatose state, half asleep, half awake, for the rest of the night. He ended up not going back to the beach that day, sleeping and shopping for most of the day instead. In fact, he didn’t end up back at the beach for another few days. After all, the boxes weren’t going to unpack themselves. (Actually they were but they wouldn’t be put away by themselves. That unfortunately was a job that Phil had to do by hand, by himself. It almost made him pack up and leave. Almost, but not quite.)

It was raining by the time Phil did end up back at the beach, this time determined to find out what it was that had been singing such a haunting, beautiful song. After speaking to the locals, all who proved to be little to no help, apart from one old lady at the cafe this very morning, Phil decided it would be better to just go explore for himself. The lady this morning had told him that the thing in the caves was territorial, and a savage. But apart from that, she didn't have any answers to what it was. With this in mind, Phil was walking towards where he had seen something move that first time. As he got closer, the song started to form in his ears, quieter but still just as powerful. Phil felt his heart clench, and he once again felt under a spell. He couldn’t stop walking even if he wanted. It was like his legs were locked, forcing him forward towards the mouth of the cave. The song got louder, and Phil realized that he didn’t actually understand it, although he thought he recognized the language. It was an ancient language, one that he probably should have learned from his parents. As the song carried him into the cave, he saw a fire in the distance, and a figure huddled behind it. A very human-like figure. Phil stopped himself just before the fire, the song dying in his ears as the...creature looked up at him, the fire illuminating round, rather brown eyes. The reflection of the fire in them made them seem almost golden. Or maybe Phil was just seeing things, because how could eyes be golden? The rest of the figure was shrouded in shadows; Phil could only see human-like arms hugging human-like legs that were pulled into a chest. He couldn’t see the face, or anything for that matter. He raised his hand to cast a spell to light the cavern they were in, when the person (?) spoke.

“Don’t.”

“Come.”

There it was again. That sweet voice. And who was Phil to deny such a sweet request. His legs carried him across the room. He fell to his knees in front of this creature, having never felt so calm in his life. The creature reached out and touched Phil's cheek with a surprisingly warm hand. A human hand. Phil leaned his head into its palm, smiling a little.

“Will you help me?” The voice was tentative, and Phil nodded slowly. The creature moved its hand, and the room seemed to get brighter, like millions of tiny candles had been lit. And Phil couldn’t contain his gasp as finally, he saw what was in front of him. His hand came up to cover his mouth, and he scrambled backward.

Sitting in front of Phil was arguably the most gorgeous creature that he had ever seen with his two eyes. The creature had long, slender legs, which were pulled up into its chest. Its skin was a light copper, and its eyes were golden brown. It had brown hair, curls that tumbled down to the base of its neck, and Phil had an urge to bury his face in them. Gold feather tattoos covered its legs from mid-calf to foot, and the same on its arms, ending just below the elbow. But what was even more spectacular than the rather heavenly creature in front of him were the wings of gold and black feathers spread out behind this being. Phil was stunned. He had never seen such a beautiful being. A siren, his mind supplied helpfully. The creature in front of him was a siren. The most feared sea creature, luring sailors and pirates alike to their watery graves. Phil was speechless, so much so that he almost didn’t notice the problem. A wing was broken. No wonder the siren was singing so sadly, it was lonely, and hurt.

“Help me,” the siren whispered, in that sweet voice that made Phil melt. He nodded, dumbfounded, and shuffled closer to the siren, who tensed up, then relaxed when it realised Phil meant no harm. Carefully, Phil raised a hand, and set to work fixing the siren.

The whole process took about two hours. Phil had to take regular breaks, and he was still exhausted by the time the siren took off into the air of the cavern with joy. Phil smiled, leaning back on the rocks of the cave, watching. He started to think of what he knew about sirens. Vicious, generally travelled in packs, or flocks. Very territorial. Cast magic with their voices, manipulating others to do what they wanted. They--wait, what? Phil’s smile fell, eyes widening as he realized what this siren was doing. It was using Phil! He looked up at it, chirping happily as it flew around the cavern. Phil scooted towards the exit. Just as he thought he was going to be able to escape, the siren called out.

“Please don’t leave me.”

Phil froze, stopping of his own free will. “Please,” he whispered, begged even. “Please don’t eat me.” He braced himself for the siren to somehow kill him. That didn’t happen, and the siren reached out to him, placing a hand on Phil’s cheek. “I won’t….Just please don’t leave me…” Phil found himself nodding meekly. This wasn’t how he wanted to go out, death by siren was hardly respectable. The siren chirped, and Phil looked up at it. The large wings were gone, instead replaced by a tattoo spanning the entirety of its back. For the first time, Phil took in what the siren was wearing. A short tunic, in an olive green, tied in place by a gold rope. As the siren turned, Phil saw its back, the large tattoo of its wings, the open back of its tunic. He bit his lip.

Phil couldn’t do much else than follow the siren to what he presumed was a nest of sorts. It was filled with shiny objects, and plush blankets that had quite obviously been stolen. It wasn’t small, by any means. Sirens attracted mates with large nests filled with shiny, soft objects. Phil remembered from a book he had read that sirens mated for life, and were extremely possessive of their mates. They also never let anyone else in their nests but said mates. The nest in which Phil was currently sitting, letting the siren play with his hair. He frowned at that. Maybe this siren’s mate didn’t mind. But if this siren had a mate, where was it?

“Daniel.” The siren had chirped with a smile as they sat down. At first, Phil thought he was calling to his mate, maybe that he had found them dinner, but he eventually realized that the siren was telling him his name. Daniel. It suited the creature. Phil smiled a bit, and leaned back into the siren-Dan’s hands combing through his hair. If he was going to be a prisoner, at least he could be one in semi-comfort. He smiled a little. “Where’s your mate?” He asked softly, but regretted it as he felt sharp claws dig into his scalp. “Ow! What the hell!” He scrambled away from Dan, turning to look at him with a glare.

“Don’t mention them.” Dan growled, his eyes dark, murderous even. Murder Birds, Phil’s mind supplied. Sirens had that nickname for a reason. Either way, any protests had died in Phil’s throat as soon as they’d started. It was so strange, how a siren could have that much of an effect on him. Wasn’t he supposed to be some great and powerful witch? Regardless, Dan seemed to settle down, preening himself lightly as he did so. Phil bit his lip, staying on his side of the nest. No thank you, Phil did not want to get on Dan’s side and be ruthlessly murdered. He stayed on his side, holding his knees to his chest and sighing, letting his eyes slip closed.

-------------------

Phil looked so peaceful sleeping. It would almost be a pity to kill him. Almost, Dan decided. Besides, he needed to eat one way or another, and he really didn’t want to have to steal another dog when such a beautiful treat had wandered right in. Dan had wanted to eat him as soon as his wing had been fixed, so he could take him and go and find his mate again. But the way in which Phil had begged for his life had been so cute, Dan had decided to play with him a little. Now, he was unguarded. And he looked delicious. Dan licked his lips, settling closer to Phil and preparing for the blow to kill the human, when Phil sneezed. Dan frowned, tilting his head curiously. That was strange. He’d never seen a human do that before. Was it broken? Dan was about to look up Phils nose when it happened again, and he scrambled back, having been sprayed with something clear and wet. Ew. He sat cross legged and observed the human. He’d never seen one this up close before, never regarded them with much thought. To him, humans were simply stupid creatures, who didn’t deserve to be alive. Dan bit his lip, taking a blanket and covering the human. He was strange, and kind. But scared. Dan could sense the fear that came off this man, and he didn’t like it. He looked towards the cave entrance, remembering how Phil had tried to leave. He was selfish keeping this human here with him. He had to let Phil go, despite his appetite-now-turned-curiosity. Phil would forget about him, anyway.

-------------------

When Phil woke up, his first thought was wondering where on Earth he was. Then he remembered. The siren. Dan. He got up, looking around for any sign of the creature, then slowly made his way to the exit. He expected to be pounced on as soon as he was at the exit, some sick joke of cat and mouse. But no, Phil made it to the exit and outside relatively unscathed. He hurried home, desperately in need of a shower, and a nap. He was somehow convinced that most of this was a dream. After all, why would there be a siren in Seaport? They were native to warmer waters. However, Phil couldn’t seem to get the beautiful face out of his mind. It plagued him when he closed his eyes, the honey-sweet voice singing softly in his ears. Fuck. Phil was trapped under a siren’s spell. And he loved it. It was intoxicating. Realistically Phil knew that he shouldn’t be head over heels with a creature that basically gets off on killing humans, but it was hard not to be. This ethereal creature was the center of his fantasies.

That night, PJ invited him over for dinner, with Chris and Annie. The house was the same as he remembered, and Phil smiled a little when he saw his friends. Annie was practically radiating when she saw Phil, giving him the biggest hug he’d ever had from her. Chris hugged him, too, which was comforting because Chris rarely gave out hugs. “What brings you down here?” Chris asked as he poured Phil a glass of wine, while PJ and Annie were out on the back porch, setting the table.

“The house was getting a little small, and there’s, like, three babies on the way. I wanted to live by myself for a little,” Phil explained, taking the offered glass and sipping.

“Well, it’s good to have another one of our kind around,” Chris smiled. “Oh, and Annie and PJ know I’m one, so you don’t have to hide it. I know you really came down here because you want to be by water. It’s only natural for a water kind to be drawn down here.” Phil smiled at that.

“You got me.” He laughed, holding his hands up in mock defense. “Say, you wouldn’t happen to know about a siren being here, would you?”

“A siren? In Seaport? Well if there is, I should think it must be crazy. I wouldn’t imagine why it would be here. Unless it was abandoned by its family on a migration?” Chris smiled a little. “I have a book on sirens you might find useful. If you want it?” Phil nodded, and Chris went to get it. It wasn’t huge, and Phil thanked Chris as he put the book in his coat pocket.

Dinner was fabulous. Annie made pasta with some kind of amazing seafood sauce, and Phil practically melted when he tried it, begging her for the recipe. Dan would like it, he thought to himself. Surprisingly, even though Phil had left, he wanted to go back to Dan, to help him. If Chris was right, he had lost his family, or his family had left him. Either way, his heart felt for the siren. Phil helped with the dishes, and the four friends sat on the porch and talked.

“Do you miss your family, Phil? I know your brother just got married, and isn’t your sister expecting? Aren’t you lonely?” Annie asked while Chris and PJ went to refill the drinks. Phil smiled.

“I suppose. But I knew that I was going to be at least a little alone when I came here. I’m not really that alone, y’know? I’ve got you guys, and I’m starting to enjoy just relaxing. Maybe I’ll get a proper job. Or I could just keep leeching off my parents. Who knows?” He laughed, and poked her in the side. “Maybe I could babysit, once you and Chris start your little family.”

“That would be lovely Phil. Thank you,” Annie said softly, looking over at him. “You seem off, if you don’t mind. Almost like you’ve met someone.” Phil laughed a little at that.

Chris and PJ came back out with the drinks, and Annie smiled, touching his arm gently. That same featherlight tough that Dan had touched him with while he had painfully worked to fix his wing. He blinked, the look of sheer joy on his siren’s face making him smile. His siren? Oh god. Abruptly, Phil stood up. “Listen, this has been wonderful, really. But I have to go. I’m sorry. I’ll explain everything later!” He smiled as he rushed out of the house, stopping only to make sure he had the book from Chris. Phil could only hope, as he sprinted towards the same cave he had been glad to see the back of earlier, that Dan was still in there. He burst in, startling the siren as he was chewing on something-oh god was that sheep?-and causing his feathers to shoot out of his arms and legs, as he jumped into attack mode, honey golden eyes flashing red.

“Dan!” Phil panted, hands on his knees. “Dan, I’m not leaving you.”

The siren frowned, before lunging at Phil and silently pinning him against a wall, finger flying frantically across Phil’s chest. It took Phil a minute to understand that Dan was drawing letters to make words. He caught some phrases, like “What are you doing?” and “How do you remember me?” It was strange, trying to piece together the messily written words, but eventually he grabbed Dan’s flying finger and held it in his hands. “Slow down, slow down. It’s okay, I have plenty of time. Just, slow down.” Dan led him back into the nest, sitting down across from Phil, knees touching, with Phil’s palm facing up.

‘How can you remember me?’ Dan traced onto Phil’s palm. Phil smiled.

“I’m a water witch. Surprise…!” He smiled a little nervously. Dan had to assume that Phil was a witch, otherwise how did Phil fix his wing? But the look on Dan’s face was adorable when he realized that water witches weren’t affected by most water creature spells. And sirens were inherently water creatures. Dan placed his finger on Phil’s palm again.

‘Why are you here?’

“Because I want to be.”

‘Go away.’

“No.” Phil laughed softly, shaking his head fondly. They sat like that for a while while Dan asked questions, and Phil dutifully answered them. It didn’t occur to Phil until later, while he gently combed through Dan's hair, the siren fast asleep with his head in Phil’s lap, that he hadn’t asked Dan any questions about his past, yet had somehow agreed to let Dan stay in his house. This would certainly be odd. Good thing he had that book.

-------------------

Phil didn’t think his life could really get any weirder, then he tried smuggling an angry siren into his house. Dan was not only grumpy because he was awake early, but Phil had forced him into a coat, something that irritated his wings. Apparently he could still feel them, even though they weren’t there, something Dan had written onto his palm as Phil had struggled him into the coat. In retaliation for wearing something so irritating, he nipped at Phils bare skin all the way home. To say Dan was uncooperative was an understatement. Thankfully, no one seemed to notice the pair as Phil was unceremoniously shoving Dan into his house. Dan practically tore Phil’s coat in half to get out of it, and as soon as the garment was on the floor he was spreading his wings and preening himself. Phil was still amazed by those beautiful wings. Black and gold feathers, lush and full, spread out before Phil. Without thinking, Phil reached out to touch, gently stroking the softness before him. Dan looked mildly annoyed, but that soon melted away and he was grinning and making a noise almost like purring as he let Phil run his hands through his feathers.

Adjusting to life with this creature was odd. Firstly, Dan didn’t talk, he mainly wrote his replies or scribbled them into Phil’s skin. Dan didn’t want to trap Phil back under his spell, and Phil almost thought Dan might be growing fond of him. And secondly, Dan had taken over Phil’s bed, piling it high with pillows and soft covers, as well as hiding some of Phil’s shiny trinkets in amongst the softness. It was like his nest back in his lonely cave, and he insisted that Phil sleep in the nest with him. And finally, Dan was used to eating raw fish, or whatever other raw meats that he could find. It took Phil a while to condition him into eating cooked meat, even if it was only just barely cooked. Despite all this, Phil still couldn’t think of anything else apart from his Dan. His siren. It was odd, really, that he could be…in love with such a creature, yet here he was, silently smitten with Dan.

The next few months passed by, with no surprises. Phil became extremely well educated on sirens. However, it was too perfect, for too long, and his little bubble of bliss was broken one stormy day. They had been out on the cliff-top at Dan’s insistence for fresh air when all of a sudden he froze, as if sensing something. He motioned for Phil to stop, and walked a little further. He stopped, and for the first time in months, Phil heard his siren singing again. Well, not literally singing. But he was talking. And that alone was enough to make Phils knees buckle, and he fell to the ground. Because another voice had joined the mix. Another silky smooth, buttery sweet voice, adding to the harmony.

“I’ve been looking for you, and this is where I find you? In a human village, with a human. Daniel, you should know better.” At another thought, the second voice wasn’t like Dan’s at all. It was sickly sweet and unkind, where Dan’s was soft and kind. It was mocking, and left a bitter taste in Phils mouth.

“Go away. You know I left for a reason. I will not go back with you!” Dan’s voice cut through the air, followed by laughter, condescending laughter.

“You and I both know that’s not true, Daniel. You’re my mate. We’re meant to be together. It’s how it works.” Phil gasped at that, biting his lip. Dan’s mate. He was here. But why? Phil always assumed that Dan’s mate was dead, and he was merely seeking comfort with Phil. Never did he think that Dan would be with him instead of his mate. That thought was absurd, because after all, why would a siren pick a human as a mate? Phil shook his head, looking back over at Dan, where he stood, a whole head shorter than his mate. Phil got to his feet, dusting himself off and rubbing his eyes. It was hard to make out the conversation over the whirling of the wind, but Dan stood tall, and Phil smiled at that. Dan had courage, and Phil felt something in his stomach, a gut feeling to do something.

“Dan!” he yelled, starling both sirens out of their stances.

“No! Phil, stay where you are, it isn’t safe!” Dan yelled back, and for once, the command given didn’t seem to hold any meaning. His mind stayed remarkably clear, while his body remained frozen. He frowned, shaking his head to clear it and ran to Dan, grabbing his face and kissing him squarely on the lips. At that point, the heavens seemed to open and Phil had to pull away to laugh at the irony. A water creature, and a water witch, kissing in the rain.

“I thought I told you to stay?” Dan asked, smiling just as wide, leaning back in when all of a sudden Phil was shoved away, and oh shit a very angry siren was marching towards him. Dan’s mate was tall, and his wings were fully spread, and the teal feathers on his arms and legs were at full attention. Phil had never seen a siren like this, his eyes flashing a deep red, readying to attack and oh god this was it, and Phil hadn’t even told his mum that he loved her. He hadn’t even told Dan that he was loved. But that final blow that he was waiting for never came. Instead, there came a squawking, and Phil opened his eyes.

Dan was fighting. He was attacking his mate, using claws, teeth, feathers, everything. And his mate was fighting back, but clearly caught off guard by Dan’s sudden attack. And while physically his mate may have been stronger, Dan fought with a passion that Phil had never seen before. Almost like he wanted to protect Phil. They ended up in the air, a skirmish of feathers and growls. Phil heard something snap, followed by a screech and he prayed that it wasn’t Dan. But Dan was flying back to Phil, bruised and bloodied, scooping him up into the air and kissing him again, while Phil clung on for dear life.

“I told you to stay put!” Dan scolded lightly, swooping lower with Phil and making him scream. He laughed and held onto Dan tight, his legs wrapped around his waist and arms clinging around Dan’s shoulders.

“Water witches are immune to water creatures spells, goof,” Phil smiled, shaking his head. “I didn’t want to tell you but you could’ve been talking this whole time.”

“I hate you.”

“I love you too.”

-------------------

Halfway between Tunisia and Sicily, there is a little island called Pantelleria, part of the Italian province of Trapani. Along the coast, away from the small towns that dot the island, there is a house only accessible by a dirt driveway, so inconspicuous that you would never notice it at a first glance. Down this driveway is a modest villa that has housed many great witch families over the years. Now, it belongs to an older witch, in his fifties. Sometimes people see him on his beach while sailing by, and more often than not, they are invited to have some wine and a light snack. If you get close enough, you hear his accent, British. If you have the chance to ask him why he is here, he will simply say “I followed my heart and it led me here”. People believe that he lost his wife, others simply say he is an artist. But often, you will see him glance up to the sunny sky, and if you are lucky, you will see a shape pass over the sun. A great winged creature, soaring high. No one knows what this creature is. All people know is that sometimes this strange man is seen sitting on the cliffs next to another man, who is clad in a tunic. Many locals say he is an angel, for they claim that he has giant gold wings that transform into a tattoo impression on his back. But you can tell this man these rumors, and he will simply shrug, and walk back up to his house. For how are the people to know whether a siren chose a human as a mate, all those years ago? Sometimes fate makes pairs in the sky that are simply meant to be. Sometimes a siren’s order simply cannot hold back the tide of love. And sometimes, just sometimes, it all turns out to be just right.

#ppb2018 #phanfiction #dan and phil #siren!dan au #witch!phil au #my fic #7k #phan #daniel howell #phil lester

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historybehindassassinscreed · 6 years

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In Game:

Bartolomeo d'Alviano was a member of the Italian Brotherhood of Assassins, and the leader of Venetian and Roman mercenaries. Being a skilled and loyal fighter, as well as commanding a fair amount of mercenaries, Bartolomeo was an important asset to his Brotherhood.

Bartolomeo, as a member of the Assassin Brotherhood, based himself in the Castello District of Venice. He resided in the district, and led the mercenaries in the city. By 1486, the Templar Silvio Barbarigo had taken control of the Castello District, capturing Bartolomeo and most of his men in the process. However, Ezio Auditore, the son of the late Assassin Giovanni Auditore, came to Bartolomeo's rescue and the two fought their way back to Bartolomeo's headquarters.

Once there, Bartolomeo and Ezio killed Silvio's remaining men and retook his quarters. Locating his longtime weapon "Bianca", Bartolomeo asked Ezio to rescue some of his men who had been captured by Silvio's thugs. After rescuing each of the captured mercenaries, Ezio returned to Bartolomeo, who then instructed him to position several of the mercenaries throughout the district to stir up enough trouble to regain it.

Aiding the mercenaries, Ezio helped by eliminating the district guards to substitute the mercenaries in their place. Upon posting the last of the men, Ezio scaled the largest tower in the district and launched a flare to signal the mercenaries to begin their attack.

From the tower, Ezio caught sight of Bartolomeo engaged in a losing battle against Dante Moro and Silvio's men. Rushing to aid him, Ezio helped Bartolomeo kill most of Silvio's men, and as Ezio was about to defeat Dante, the latter abandoned the fight and fled to L'Arsenale.

In response, Bartolomeo called for Ezio to follow the fleeing man, as he would likely lead him straight to Silvio. Sure enough, as Silvio and Dante fled for their ship destined for Cyprus, they were both caught and assassinated by Ezio. Afterwards, Bartolomeo thanked and congratulated Ezio on liberating the Castello District from Silvio's oppression, and the two parted ways.

Two years later, Bartolomeo joined with several other Assassins to acquire the Apple of Eden from Rodrigo Borgia, the Grand Master of the Templars. However, when they reached Rodrigo, they found Ezio already combating Rodrigo and his guards.

Bartolomeo and the other Assassins hurried to Ezio's side, and upon killing all the guards and causing Rodrigo to flee without the Apple, the group revealed themselves to be Assassins, a fact previously unknown by Ezio. They then inducted Ezio into the Order atop a tall tower, before the group each performed a Leap of Faith from its side.

In 1496, Bartolomeo joined the Orsini in a battle against the Borgia, who were attempting to seize Orsini territory. Bartolomeo's resources were cut down to three fortresses by the Borgia, but his fighting spirit kept him going. Cesare Borgia completely cut off his supplies when he thought victory was near, but Carlo Orsini arrived just in time to support Bartolomeo, even wounding Cesare in the face.

Later, in 1499, Bartolomeo and his forces created diversions throughout Rome, distracting a large portion of the Papal Guard and allowing Ezio a chance to infiltrate the Vatican and confront Rodrigo.

In 1500, Bartolomeo and his new wife Pantasilea Baglioni moved to Rome, using the Caserma di Alviano as their new barracks. Alongside the other Assassins, Bartolomeo sought to liberate the city from the Borgia oppression, and thus focused his mercenaries on the French army led by the Baron Octavian de Valois.

However, Bartolomeo soon found himself attacked on two fronts: Borgia on one side, and French on the other. That same year, Bartolomeo met again with Ezio Auditore, who helped Bartolomeo liberate the surrounding region from Borgia control. In exchange, Ezio requested that Bartolomeo find the whereabouts of Rodrigo and Cesare Borgia; after locating Rodrigo and Cesare, Bartolomeo met with the others at Tiber Island to discuss the Assassins' plans.

Three years later, Bartolomeo was still at war with the Baron de Valois. When Ezio met with Bartolomeo again to discuss plans to take out the French commander, their conversation was cut short by a mercenary who alerted Bartolomeo to a surprise assault by French troops.

Fighting alongside Ezio and his mercenaries, Bartolomeo successfully defended the barracks from the attack, after which they gathered at the main gate. There, the pair spotted the Baron signaling for their attention from the field.

Octavian called out to request Bartolomeo's surrender in exchange for his wife, whom he had kidnapped. Enraged, Bartolomeo shouted insults to the commander, and eventually tore after him on horseback as the French army withdrew.

As he and Ezio arrived at the French camp, the Castra Praetoria, they concluded that it was impenetrable. Distraught, Bartolomeo resignedly decided to surrender, and enter the enemy base bearing gifts, out of hope that they would spare his wife.

However, Ezio came up with an alternative, and upon returning to the barracks, he suggested that they disguise Bartolomeo's mercenaries as French soldiers, and have them pretend to deliver a captured Bartolomeo.

After Bartolomeo offered his enthusiastic approval, Ezio retrieved some suits of armor by stealthily killing several French guards. Upon regrouping with Bartolomeo, Ezio, posing as a French captain, cleared the way for the disguised battalion all the way to the French camp, which they entered with ease.

As they faced Octavian, Bartolomeo started to openly threaten him, demanding that Pantasilea be released. However, the Baron only remarked that "savages never learn", and raised his firearm to kill Pantasilea.

Acting swiftly, Ezio fired his Hidden Gun as a sign to Bartolomeo's mercenaries, breaking their cover and causing confusion among the French guards. In the skirmish that followed, Octavian fled deeper into the camp with Pantasilea in tow. Ezio followed and assassinated him, freeing Pantasilea. As Bartolomeo hugged his wife, she thanked him, calling him her prince. Afterwards, the three and the mercenaries returned to the barracks.

Later that year, Bartolomeo met with the other Assassins to fight the remnants of Cesare Borgia's followers at the gates of Rome. After the final supporters were killed, they witnessed Cesare being arrested by Bartolomeo's cousin, Fabio Orsini, and later returned to their respective bases.

In 1509, Bartolomeo fought in the Battle of Agnadello to protect the Shroud of Eden, which was located there. He allegedly attacked the enemy without the authorization of the Orsini, the commander-in-chief at the time. He was greatly wounded as a result, but managed to recover and rally his troops. He won the hearts of the citizens of Agnadello, and they in turn helped Bartolomeo and his men in gathering resources. He also recruited several of the villagers, and his men received weapons from the local blacksmiths. Despite his efforts, the French soon overran his troops, and Bartolomeo was captured.

In 1510, Bartolomeo was visited by Ezio in Ostia, who requested his assistance in traveling to Bari to begin his journey to Masyaf in Syria, in hopes of finding the library of Altaïr Ibn-La'Ahad. Bartolomeo, happy to see Ezio get back into action, accompanied his friend to Bari, from where they parted ways.

In Real Life:

Bartolomeo d'Alviano was born in 1455 to Francesco d'Alviano and Isabella degli Atti.

Bartolomeo fought very early in his life in Central Italy, serving in the Papal States and, in 1496, the Orsini family against Pope Alexander VI and the Colonna.

In 1503, hired by Ferdinand II of Spain, he was determinant in the victory at the Battle of Garigliano over the French army, which started the Spanish domination over southern Italy. At the beginning of 1505 he was employed by the Venetians and was granted a cavalry captaincy by the Senate with an annual pay of 150 gold pounds. In 1507, together with Nicolò Orsini, Bartolomeo was hired by the Republic of Venice. The following year he defeated the Imperial Army of Maximilian I, Holy Roman Emperor in Cadore, at Mauria and Pontebba, conquering Gorizia and Trieste. In the same year Pordenone also fell and the Serenissima assigned its signory to d'Alviano himself (the town will be ruled by d'Alviano family until 1539).

In 1509 (the year he began the construction of new city walls at Padua), however, he was crushingly defeated at the Battle of Agnadello, being also wounded in the fray. D'Alviano was charged of the result, as he allegedly attacked the enemy without the authorisation of Orsini, then commander-in-chief. Captured by the French, he remained a prisoner until 1513. In 1513, after the alliance between France and Venice against the Duchy of Milan, he was freed, and later fought under the French commander Louis de la Trémoille. He was defeated at the Battle of Vicenza by the Spanish Viceroy of Naples Ramón de Cardona.

(Image source)

Later d'Alviano again conquered, and sacked, Pordenone, which in the meantime had fallen again to the House of Habsburg. He was subsequently a protagonist of the French victory at Marignano (September 1515), in which he attacked the Swiss mercenaries with a corps of only 300 knights. Later he managed to conquer also Bergamo, but died in October of the same year during the siege of Brescia.

He was buried in the church of Santo Stefano in Venice.

Sources:

http://www.italiamedievale.org/portale/eventi-per-i-500-anni-dalla-morte-di-bartolomeo-dalviano/

http://www.comune.alviano.tr.it/hh/index.php

http://www.hup.harvard.edu/catalog.php?isbn=9780674022843&content=toc

#Assassin's Creed #Multi-Game #AC 2 #AC B #People

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find-a-way-2-my-heart · 6 years

Text

Farmers' Market Challenge

Disclaimer: I own nothing but my overactive imagination

A/N: This was written in 2011 for a challenge in a LJ group of JM Fanfic I was part of.

Pairing: John Mayer x OC/Carl Mayer x OC

Word count: 2084

Warnings: N/A

"Maybe I should call her?" Carl whined from the living room and John held in the thousand curses that crossed his mind at that very moment. His girlfriend of almost eighteen months had broken up with him the week before, and he had been moping around at John's house ever since. Eating all his food, drinking all of his beer and soon making an everlasting dent in his couch, since he hardly moved from there. John walked up to the living room and wasn't surprised to see Carl sitting on the same spot, beer bottle in hand, and the same sweatpants he had worn for the past couple of days. His hair a mess and his eyes red both from the lack of sleep as well as the abuse of alcohol. At the rate he was going, he probably wouldn't have a fully functioning liver by the end of the month. Deciding that it was time to do something instead of just watching him wither away, even though it had been fun for the first couple of days, John reached out and grabbed the beer from Carl's hands. "Enough of this. Get up and go take a shower, we're going out!" John bellowed and almost laughed when Carl literally jumped on his seat. "What are you talking about? I'm not going anywhere, I just need peace to go through this," Carl said, using that whining tone that no one would ever believe it was coming from a thirty-four year old. "Carl William Mayer, I'm telling you, raise that lousy ass from this couch right now and get on the shower, or I'll be flying Mom in and you know that she won't have half the patience I'm having with you right now. Now GO!" John commanded again and the mention of Margaret seemed to take the desired effect, as he stood up and dragged himself to the bathroom, cursing all the way until he closed the door and John couldn't listen to him anymore. *** "Come on Amy! I can't believe that you'll spend the little time we'll have together crying over a failed relationship, it wasn't you that ended things in the first place?" Annie said, sliding into her sister bed and hugging her tightly. She was in town to spend her vacation with her sister and wouldn't certainly allow a break-up to spoil it. She had met Carl a couple of times and had thought him to be a thorough nice guy. She didn't know why Amy had broken up with him in the first place, as her sister didn't get into any specifics, but she was sure that she hadn't meant it, or else she wouldn't be that miserable. "I did, but I miss him..." she confessed, and Annie realized that there'd be another bout of crying if she didn't act quickly. "Okay, Amy, that's it... Let's get out from this bed and do something fun, at least to take your mind off of it for a while, what do you say?" Annie said animatedly, pulling her sister by the hand to get her out of bed, glad to see her giggling in response. "All right, just let me take a shower and we'll go," Amy promised and headed to the bathroom, as Annie headed out to the guest bedroom and did the same. *** "Farmers' Market? Honestly?" Carl grunted as John parked the car. "What's the matter? There's sun, there's people and there's food. Real food, not that junk you've been munching on for the past week," John said, smiling brightly as they left the car and headed towards the stands, being assaulted by all of the noises and smells. "Yeah, whatever..." Carl shrugged and followed John, looking every inch as a kid that had just been chastised. They wandered around and John was happy to see Carl loosening up a little, and even making friends with a lady that was selling cakes, exchanging a few tips and recipes. He even caught Carl smiling a little and was happy with his accomplishment. "Think I might bake something today," Carl said, after he had parted his conversation with the old lady. "That's nice, what are you thinking on baking?" John asked as they approached the fruit stands. "I don't know, maybe an apple pie, but the recipe for the banana cake that lady gave to me seems delicious, what do you think?" He asked John, who was playing with an apple from one of the stands. Carl's question startled him and he ended up letting the apple fall on the floor, what earned him a stern look from the guy responsible for the stand. "Sorry!" He apologized hastily and bended to pick the apple up from the floor. It had a moss on the side it had fallen. "You dropped it, you pay for it," the guy said and John sighed, getting a bill from his pocket and handing it to the guy, throwing the apple away in the nearest trashcan. Raising his head, he didn't see Carl. "Carl?" He called and soon saw his brother crouched a few feet ahead, talking to a little girl. He walked up to them and saw her hand him a banana. "It's the most delicious banana in the world, it has magic powers," the little girl was saying and John couldn't help but to chuckle. "Really?" Carl asked, accepting the fruit from the little girl's hands. "Yes, my mom says it makes you grow. Although I think you are tall enough already," the little girl said and Carl laughed. John felt good upon listening to it. Getting out of the house was definitely helping. After talking some more with the girl and walking around buying a variety of fruits and vegetables, some John hadn't even heard about before, they walked up to a charming coffee shop to sit down for a bit. They ordered coffee and muffins, and were waiting for their orders to arrive when John felt Carl stiffening in his seat. "What is it, Carl?" John asked, touching his arm. He didn't seem to have acknowledged the touch, though, as his eyes seemed fixed somewhere else. John cursed under his breath when he realized to where, or better saying, to whom he was staring. Amelia Louis, the girl responsible for Carl's broken heart, was standing just a few feet away, eating on a scone and talking animatedly to another girl. John let go of Carl's arm when his eyes laid on Amy's companionship. She had long curly dirty blonde hair, that hung loose down her back, tamed only by a black bandana that was tied to like a tiara, to keep her hair from falling over her face. She had a bright smile, and curves that made John's pants tighten. While he was busy checking out Amy's friend, he let go of Carl's arm, and didn't realize that he had stood up and headed to where Amy was until he entered his field of vision. "Oh shit!" He muttered and stood up quickly, way too quickly, as he failed to notice the waitress coming in his direction with their order, and stumbled into her straight on, splashing coffee all over her uniform and a little over his shirt. "Oh my God, I'm so sorry," he apologized and helped her gather everything from the floor and paying the bill, leaving a generous tip, before finally heading to where Carl was standing. "Hi Amy," he said quietly, as he reached the trio. It was clear that it was an uncomfortable situation, with Amy and Carl just staring at each other in an uncomfortable silence. "Hi, I'm John," he said, offering his hand to Amy's friend, who seemed to be as uncomfortable as he was. "Hi, I'm Anastasia Louis, but everyone calls me Annie. Nice shirt, by the way," she chuckled while shaking his hand, and just now John looked down to his yellow shirt and realized the damage that the coffee had done. A stain right in the middle of his chest. “Oh fuck!” he cursed. “It gives it a whole other charm, like tie dye,” Annie chuckled as she observed John as he assessed the damage in his shirt. “Well, since I don’t have another shirt to wear, I’ll stick to the tie dye thing, it makes me feel less the three year old that can’t hold a cup,” John smiled and Annie smiled back, making him stare at her. But soon his attention was diverted again to his brother, who had started speaking. “I just wanted to know why…” Carl said and John went to stand beside him, like he was offering moral support. “I…” Amy said, but was interrupted by Annie. “Not even he knows why, Amy? What happened? What are you hiding?” Annie asked softly, even though John was able to sense a hint of urgency in her voice. “I found the ring, Carl,” Amy whispered. John and Annie looked at each other confused, but Carl seemed to know exactly of what she was talking about. “How did you do it? I had it hidden in a pretty safe place, because I intended it to be a surprise.” “I broke my glasses while I was writing, it was a Sunday evening, so I went to look for some duct tape to repair it temporarily until I was able to go to the store, you know that I can’t write without my glasses or I get those nasty headaches,” Amy explained and Carl just nodded knowingly. “So I panicked, all right? I’m not that sure if I am ready for a step that big.” “Then you decided that it would be easier to break-up with me and go on with your life. You didn’t love me enough to not even consider talking to me about it?” “Carl, please… This was the hardest decision of my life, I love you, I am miserable without you, but I panicked!” Amy declared and as if it was rehearsed, both of them started to walk towards each other, closing the distance. “Amy, I love you, you are the best thing that has ever happened to me and yes, I do want to marry you, but if you don’t feel comfortable to do it soon, I can wait, I can be patient, just don’t make me live without you,” Carl said and his hand reached out to touch Amy’s cheek who, in turn, closed her eyes and molded her face to his hand. John and Annie looked at each other and smiled. “I don’t want to live without you either. This week has been hell to me, a little sample of how hard my life would be without you by my side,” Amy said, opening her eyes and holding Carl’s hand between her own. “You don’t need to feel like that anymore, baby,” and then Carl leaned in and kissed her. John and Annie kept on smiling and high-fived. As the kiss went on, Annie and John looked at each other and started walking away from the couple, allowing them the alone time they most certainly needed. “So, can I buy you a cup of coffee?” John asked as they walked aimlessly. “Are you sure? Or are you planning on adding one more stain to your shirt?” Annie laughed and John felt goose bumps. “You are a smartass, I like it. And no, no plans to add any more stains,” he smiled and noticed that she was blushing a little. “Okay, I guess I can probably fit it in on my busy schedule,” Annie laughed and linked her arm on John’s. And he couldn’t remember the last time he had felt more comfortable. As they parted the kiss, Carl and Amy looked at each other and smiled. As they looked around, both of them were confused not seeing their siblings around. Quickly scanning their surroundings, Carl located John and Annie, arms linked and laughing. He pointed them to Amy, who smiled. “Do you think we should join them?” Amy asked, as they watched the couple sit at the same coffee shop John and Carl had been just a few moments before, seemingly deeply engrossed in conversation. “Nah… I don’t think they want company right now. Besides, I bet we have more interesting things to do,” Carl declared and Amy laughed as he passed an arm over her shoulder and she snuggled on to him and they started walking on the opposite direction of the coffee shop.

#John Mayer #jhnmyr #John Mayer Fanfic #JM Fanfic #John x OC #Fan Fiction #FanFic #FanFiction #RPF

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uniquequotesonlife · 4 years

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10 Best Movies of 2019 (So Far)

With the summer movie season winding down, we look back at the top 10 films cinema has had to offer this far into 2019.

The summer movie season of 2019 is over. While the heat continues to swelter, and school by and large remains out, the final weekend of new Hollywood blockbuster extravaganzas has sped off the scene like a getaway car. And given the box office receipts for most of the studio tentpoles this year, we imagine the whole industry is ready to put the summer behind them. Be that as it may, cinema remains strong, hence why we think is the perfect time to look back on the year so far. While many others like to take stock of the movie calendar at the literal halfway mark that occurs at the end of June, we prefer letting the biggest moviegoing season to wrap up and only start reflecting during the deep breath before film festivals like TIFF and Telluride kick off the awards season. Indeed, you’ll see below that this July and August have been unusually fruitful. Looking back at the first seven-plus months of 2019 reveals that, for whatever box office hand-wringing, it’s already been a promising time for new voices making an impact and legendary auteurs communicating with the changing filmmaking landscape. So without further ado, please join us in celebrating the top 10 movies of 2019. So far.

10. The Peanut Butter Falcon

Tall tales and the myths they build can be stronger than any river current in the American South. Many of the best works of fiction from that part of the country embrace such grandiosity, and The Peanut Butter Falcon is no exception. An infinitely sweet film populated with outsized personalities, directors Tyler Nilson and Mike Schwartz’s transcendentalist adventure was one of the biggest surprises out of SXSW earlier this year, and months later it still radiates an authentic breezy charm. Very much a modern day Huckleberry Finn for those labeled as disabled or special needs, the film crafts its own legend around Zak (Zack Gottsagen), a young man with Down Syndrome that society wishes to forget. Save for Eleanor (Dakota Johnson), his concerned doctor at the retirement home the state abandoned him in, no one really cares when Zak escapes to chase his dream of becoming a professional wrestler. Yet a dispiriting prologue gives way to the loveliest journey as Zak befriends Tyler (Shia LaBeouf) and hitches a ride with the good ol’ boy on a raft floating down the North Carolina Outer Banks. It’s a movie happily supplied with homespun love and wonderfully textured characters, including all three leads, among whom LaBeouf proves nigh unrecognizable as the reluctant Good Samaritan by way of Mark Twain’s St. Petersburg.

9. Luce

The best movies provoke discussion, and few this year will be as challenging as the conversations borne by director Julius Onah and screenwriter J.C. Lee’s Luce. A film based on Lee’s own play, the movie interrogates the idea of the American Dream and wonders if even when it comes true, how much of that is a manipulation by those who espouse skepticism of it. The film is about a star athlete and valedictorian named Luce (Kelvin Harrison Jr.). Actually, Luce was just what his parents (Naomi Watts and Tim Roth) made up after they adopted him from a war-torn African nation, unable to pronounce his birth name. Even so, he very much is their son and not only the apple of their eye, but that of his whole school. Perhaps this is why his teacher, Ms. Harriet Wilson (Octavia Spencer), holds him to a different standard than his other African American peers. It’s a story about a school-sized tinderbox of good intentions that threatens to ignite after Harriet finds illegal fireworks in Luce’s locker, all of which bubbles with the tension of a thriller even as it plays like a truth-searching drama. Luce is a Rorschach Test for both the characters and audiences to examine their own racial biases, and the hypocrisy of expectations. Nevertheless, the film exceeds ours.

8. Avengers: Endgame

It would be easy in more cynical circles to shrug off Avengers: Endgame as the ultimate fan service movie, and in fact it is. But after 11 years of world-building, and the even more impressive franchise-building occurring outside of its continuity, Marvel Studios’ 22nd installment is the grandest of commercial and long-form narrative achievements. By making a series finale to all the movies that came before it, including the cliffhanger in Avengers: Infinity War, Marvel Studios President Kevin Feige and his legion of collaborators, most notably directors Joe and Anthony Russo, and Iron Man star Robert Downey Jr., find the rare quality that most eludes traditional television storytellers: a fully satisfying ending. At three hours, Avengers: Endgame rises above almost anything else Marvel has ever produced and acts as a pseudo-manifesto for the studio. While many of the parts are lesser than the whole, the tight storytelling and tonal consistency over nearly two dozen films pays off with the kind of multi-tiered catharsis and spectacle that drives global moviegoers into theaters by the tens of millions. Not since the days of Cecil B. DeMille has there been an epic so brimming with familiar faces, but unlike the overstuffed Infinity War, this showmanship is wrapped in a bow of gracefulness. This is the ultimate Marvel Studios movie. With a renewal of the charisma and humanity Downey first brought to this enterprise, there is a creative spark shining bright here… and that leaves open the question of how Marvel can possibly repeat this high-note, both in terms of heart and gross, ever again.

7. Toy Story 4

Toy Story 4 didn't need to be made. The ending of 2010’s Toy Story 3 was the perfect conclusion to a saga that began the day a child named Andy first played with a cowboy doll called Woody. Yet we’re so glad that Toy Story 4 exists, as Pixar discovered a soulful epilogue to the characters who first made the studio the preeminent animation house of the 21st century. Essentially a coda to an already finished yarn, Pixar’s elegant solution to being required to return to the childhood daydream of Woody and Buzz Lightyear is to permanently wrap-up their shared journey in the most adult of ways. On the surface, this is another story about Woody (Tom Hanks) trying to teach a wayward toy its purpose, in this case a do-it-yourself Frankenstein’s Monster named Forky (Tony Hale). But Toy Story 4 raises a much more interesting question about what would make Woody want to move on with his life as a lost toy? Experiencing something akin to a midlife crisis when he crosses paths with old flame Bo Peep (Annie Potts), Woody is asked to change his perspective of what life is meant to be after reaching a certain age, just as a post-John Lasseter Pixar discovers a new and hopefully more inclusive identity. This movie does, after all, finally give Bo Peep depth and a humanity as heart-rending as anything to do with the cowboy that has a snake in his boot. Not bad for characters made of cloth and porcelain.

6. Midsommar

If you ever wanted a movie to burn down your toxic relationship, Midsommar is gasoline that comes with already lit flames. As Ari Aster’s heartfelt explanation of why some people do not belong together, this Swedish set film turns cult-based horror on its head and reverses everything you might expect from the director of Hereditary. Bringing horror out into the sunshine, Midsommar presents a world that is as shadowless as it is pitiless. Taking place almost entirely during the July rituals of an obscure (and fictional) Pagan commune, the film provides a set of antagonists who might kill you with kindness while displaying an egalitarian empathy as foreign to modern (and selfish) American traditions as their deadlier customs. This creates a striking backdrop to a potent allegory about why Florence Pugh’s Dani and Jack Reynor’s Christian really should have broken up long ago. Pugh is especially haunting as a young woman who’s in a state of perpetual trauma after hanging on to a worn-out band aid in need of tearing for six months. Her harrowing epiphany adds an insidious persuasiveness to cruel machinations that turn cooing Millennial intellectuals into horror’s new dumb American red meat. And the fumes produced by their roasting are quite beautiful, indeed.

5. The Farewell

Another film about the shock incurred by contrasting cultures, The Farewell is also a gorgeously realized portrait of a woman who feels drawn yet alienated by both sides of her identity. But whatever confusion she might experience is supplanted by an absolute love for her grandmother and the connection that elder represents to an ever-fading past. Writer-director Lulu Wang’s incredibly personal drama is equal parts hilarious and heartbreaking, all while never once making a single false step in its unusual path through grief—one that must be made in total silence. The Farewell centers on Awkwafina’s Billi, a 30-year-old New Yorker who was born in China and was only six when her parents moved to the States, leaving a vague impression of an idyllic childhood with her grandmother Nai Nai (Shuzhen Zhou). However, what exactly this feeling of severed identity means to Billi comes to the surface when Nai Nai is diagnosed with lung cancer… something that her family will not tell her of because in China, it is the family’s emotional burden to carry the knowledge of a seeming death sentence. Believing she only is suffering from a cold, Nai Nai is thrilled that her adult children from America and Japan are returning home for a wedding that is in reality a pretense for everyone to say goodbye—although not Billi. Her parents think she’ll crack and admit this pantomime. Thus she must crash her grandmother’s own living wake. Billi’s saddened homecoming is constantly juxtaposed by her grandmother’s glowing delight to have a full house again. Occupying the space between tragedy and joy, Billi’s Western apprehension to Chinese custom and her longing to reconnect with it, Wang finds a canvas to paint every shade of anguish and exhilaration offered by nostalgia and an unfamiliar heritage. Awkwafina also confirms she is a star on the rise by carrying this intimate tragi-comedy with a role that requires her to speak in English, in Chinese, and most impressively not at all, while still saying everything.

4. Us

Jordan Peele follows up his directorial debut with another horror movie that will be dissected and debated for a long time to come. More ambitious than Get Out, and arguably the most vividly photographed chiller in ages, Us is bigger but still razor-focused on its subject. A massive allegory about class warfare turning storybook supernatural, Peele imagines a conflict between the haves and have-nots in American society while noting that, at the heart of the matter, they’re the same exact type of people. With a deft touch and sense of humor that is as refreshing as it was in Get Out, Peele introduces audiences to the Wilson family, who have seemingly everything but are still envious of keeping up with the proverbial (white) Joneses. For patriarch Gabe (Winston Duke), this can be accepted as a point of obliviousness, but Lupita Nyong’o’s Adelaide cannot feign such innocence as she has seen the face of want and hunger—it was her own—and she left it to rot. Yet it rises for her again when “Red,” her doppelganger she once spied in a funhouse mirror, comes home with equally twisted doubles of her family. It is a tour de force showcase for Nyong’o, who gives an Oscar-worthy turn as both Adelaide and Red. Us provides a juicy parable as rich as the best Twilight Zone storytelling by Rod Serling that inspired it. The end might overreach, but the breadth of its vision and arm remains an inspiration.

3. The Last Black Man in San Francisco

You cannot hate a place unless you love it. This is a paradox that Joe Talbot and Jimmie Fails’ The Last Black Man in San Francisco posits with illuminating insight. An epic poem for the modern age of gentrification, this is a movie that focuses on a Bay City whose skyrocketing real estate has pushed the faces and hands that built its skyline to the fringes. It’s a fact of life encapsulated by an opening image of a young black girl going to school by the edge of saltwater so poisonous that city employees will only venture there in hazmat suits. Pushed literally to the edge of society, Jimmie Fails—a character played by the man who has lived this life and wrote the story down—dreams of reclaiming what was once his family’s birthright: a Victorian home in the Golden Gate area that his grandfather claims to have built with his own hands. It is now owned by a privileged middle aged white couple, yet when they enter into an inheritance dispute with relatives, an opportunity opens up for Jimmie and his best friend Montgomery (Jonathan Majors) to move in as squatters. This is a lyrical love letter to cities that no longer exist, and landscapes that once allowed dignity for those who toiled in them. Obviously it is Jimmie’s personal life story, but it is the insights of Montgomery, Emile Mosseri’s mournful score, and Adam Newport-Berra’s surreal camera setups that elevate Last Man’s song and verse into a celestial elegy. One which provides as much hope as it does despair.

2. Once Upon a Time in Hollywood

The arrival of a new Quentin Tarantino movie always comes with debate and some degree of controversy. But when the smoke clears, Once Upon a Time… in Hollywood will be remembered as one of his very best. A film that demands multiple viewings, Once Upon a Time is the rare major studio movie that requires you to meet it on its own terms, a sad fact Tarantino is aware of and deconstructs with a surprising degree of wistful melancholy. An obvious love letter to the long-gone Hollywood of the 1960s, which by ’69 saw the studio system in its death throes, the movie is also a commentary of our own cultural moment where auteurs pursuing massive original ideas, like Tarantino, and movie stars not defined by what cape they’ve worn on screen, like Leonardo DiCaprio and Brad Pitt, are almost a thing of the past. Tarantino’s elegiac meditation is as much about his and movie stars’ own setting sun as it is the Hollywood movies he grew up on, but it is also an unimaginably ambitious and celebratory film that dismisses plot and audience expectations that have been flattened by a decade of formula. Here is a film that revels in just chilling out with morally ambiguous characters while also offering a vessel that connects the past and present via giddy historical revisionist madness. Starring DiCaprio and Pitt as fading TV star Rick Dalton and his stuntman Cliff Booth, the film champions the intangible alchemy between charisma and cinema, providing both with their best material in years. Pitt may, in fact, have never been better than as the smiling cowboy whose high noon is with a counterculture that is burying his and Rick’s livelihoods. Their journeys, meanwhile, are paralleled by the rise of a new star named Sharon Tate (Margot Robbie) and the youthful change she represents. The importance of Sharon, and her subtly interconnected world, is determined by how much you know of her going in. For those who do, she is more than just the idol of her age; she is the soul of Tarantino’s sweetest movie, both in terms of its ‘60s setting and its desire to divorce a lifetime of light from the specter of Charles Manson’s half-century of darkness. Unlike Tarantino’s last three pictures, this isn’t about revenge; it’s a bedtime yarn dreaming of salvation for Hollywood, for culture, and for a legacy that can live on past 26 years.

1. Booksmart

Despite her celebrity, Olivia Wilde has always seemed a little underrated as an actor. That should change going forward as Wilde also announces herself as a major directorial talent with Booksmart. A pitch-perfect comedy that writes a teen anthem for the next generation, Booksmart proves that the cinematic R-rated comedy is not dead, and further it can only get better as it invites new diverse voices to reconfigure the form. Among those voices accompanying Wilde are screenwriters like Susanna Fogel and Katie Silberman, and a fresh-faced cast that is more than game to refocus the coming-of-age narrative on the type of nerdy young women who previously might’ve been lucky to be in the fuzzy background, if included at all. Kaitlyn Dever and Beanie Feldstein make a banquet out of protagonists Amy and Molly, two Type A’s who are Ivy League-bound and think the perfect night before graduation is watching Ken Burns documentaries. But upon realizing that all the supposed flakes they wrote off in their senior class are also headed toward bright futures after four years of partying, Molly will make up for missing out by dragging Amy on an odyssey toward the perfect Gen-Z high school party. So there you have it, the 10 best movies of the year so far. Agree? Disagree? Did we leave something off? Let us know in the comment section below! Sourcehttps://www.denofgeek.com/us/movies/282640/best-movies-2019 Read the full article

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luckyinmoonlight-blog · 7 years

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CHAPTER ONE

My face had to be bright red at this point. I could feel the heat radiating off of my cheeks. It didn't matter at this point in time how much foundation, concealer, bronzer, and blush was applied to my face by the cosmetic team because I was sure to have it run off before I even made it to the stage.

He was ruining me, and I had only known him for a month. It was the way he looked at me... longingly. It's like he needed to stare me down. Harry Styles, was running me, and I was allowing it to happen.

"Mollie, you're up!" Dan shouted from behind his large studio camera.

Deep breaths, you can do this. I can do this.

I stepped onto the raised platform as Jimmy Fallon continued to crack up at some joke Harry made nearly two minutes ago. Boy, that guy could sure laugh. But I wasn't laughing. I was sweating like a stuffed pig, apple in the mouth and all. I should be trying my hardest not to look freaking constipated, instead, I worried about what Harry would think.

My fingers were shaking but I blew out a quick breath and wiggled my fingers before gripping the guitar pick once again. Okay, smile I told myself, and then I smiled into the microphone because the camera would scan to me at any second now...

"Here she is, the girl we've been waiting for! Mollie Roark performing her brand new first single..." Jimmy eagerly belted into the microphone. I laughed a little giggle as my band started up performing the song... that I wrote... that was being performed live by myself on late night television. Shit. Don't faint.

"Not too shabby, I would say." He whispered into my ear, making the blonde hairs on my arm stand up. I was thankful that we were in my dressing room backstage alone. I didn't need any media footage leaking of the newbie singer with Harry.

"Thanks, my vocals could have been less shaky but I-"

"Oh shush. For your first time performing live on the telly, I would say you did damn bloody good!" Harry smiled as his finger traced my lower lip causing another shiver down my spine. Who taught this boy how to flirt?!

"Thanks, it means a lot."

The smile he gave back lit his eyes up. His beautiful green eyes. I had only known Harry for two months, but I think I was falling in love. Love. Such a strange concept, I have never been in love before. But I can't ever recall a time when my stomach would do nauseating flips just by someone smiling at me. The thought of Harry gave me anxiety. How could this perfect boy want anything to do with ordinary Mollie Roark?

I was your average 22-year-old girl. I grew up in Green Hills, Tennessee just outside downtown Nashville. My father Ben is an accountant, and my mother Kathryn is a middle school art teacher. I lived a normal life. I graduated from Hillsboro High School. The only interesting thing about me up until now was I grew up outside of Nashville, where my love of music flourished.

My brother Spencer is 19 and is currently a student at the University of South Carolina. I never went to college, but I visit him as well as my best friend from high school Annie Keller, who goes to East Carolina University.

Now, you could argue that I live anything but a normal life. I still reside in Green Hills with my parents. But I am more frequently traveling to New York City once a month trying to get my music to be heard. This is how I ended up on Jimmy Fallon. But more importantly, music is what brought me Harry Styles.

"I'm staying at the Gramercy Park Hotel tonight, are you?"

"Yeah right. I'm not international pop sensation Harry Styles."

He blushed a little at my comment. I think he truly forgot sometimes how famous he truly was. Crap, I offended him.

He scratched the back of his neck and bent his neck to look more towards the floor. "I- I didn't mean anything by that. I let my management team book hotels, I truly don't have a preference they just-"

"Harry stop! You don't have to explain anything to me, I was only kidding."

"I know Mollie. You're a true friend."

Shit- wait, what. A true friend? Usually, I would take this as a compliment. It is a nice thing to say. But did I really want my crush calling me "a true friend"? That was friend zone material if I've ever heard of it.

Ignoring my fallen face like a true gentleman, Harry continued on "What hotel are you staying at? Maybe I can come over, we can hang out? Only, if you want to of course."

"I'm at The Hotel at Times Square, and I would really like that. It would be nice to hang out somewhere, more relaxed for once."

"I would like that too."

My iPhone began vibrating in my bag and Harry and I finally averted our eyes from one another before I mumbled a sorry and went over to pick it up.

It read incoming FaceTime from Mom.

I answered the call and saw both my mother and father sitting on the couch in our family room.

"Hello?"

"MOLLIE! Oh my gosh, we watched the whole thing- "

Harry smiled, "I'll leave you to it, I'll text you." Before exiting my dressing room.

"Stayed up late and everything for it. You were just fabulous." My mom continued beaming.

"Good job, Molls." My dad smiled politely.

"Has Spencer or Annie texted you yet? Oh, I bet they are so thrilled to see you on the television. Isn't it wonderful, Benjamin?"

"It's something, dear."

My dad was clearly the calm one out of both of my parents.

"Thanks, mom, thanks dad. Actually, I haven't heard from Spencer or Annie. Probably at some wild college party."

"Mollie! Don't scare me like that. You know I'm constantly worried about your.... Well... not so mature brother." Her face did look really concerned. That was my mother for you. The three of us would pick on her all the time for it. I practically begged her to allow me to travel to New York by myself this time. I felt bad she was using all of her work leave to travel with me, and I was 22 years old, a legal adult.

"Oh relax Kathryn, we all know Spencer can hold his liquor."

SLAP! My mother's dainty hand hit right on my dad's shoulder. My dad just laughed at her and turned back towards the phone. "Mollie, please come home soon and rescue me from this mad woman."

"You guys will miss me when I'm gone!" my mother said flustered and frustrated.

I giggled but saw my manager Jessie walk into the dressing room, "Hey mom and dad thanks for calling, it means a lot. But, Jessie is here so I should probably go."

"Text me when you get to your hotel sweetie." My mother said sternly.

"Don't forget, Molls. Or your mom won't sleep." My dad warned, and he was dead serious.

"I won't. Love you."

"We love you too." They both answered, and then I clicked the end button.

"Hey, Jessie." I smiled as I flopped onto the loveseat and opened a bottle of Core water.

"Nice job out there Mollie. We are in the process of making you a star! Jimmy and his team thought you were fantastic!"

"I'm glad, I was nervous. But I think it went well."

"It did! I would tell you if you were bad." Jessie combed a hair through her black hair and looked around the dressing room. "Well grab your stuff, they need to start cleaning up, and we should probably check into the hotel."

There was a light knock on the hotel door letting me know he was here. I carefully got up from the king size bed I was sitting on and smoothed out the covers to make them look perfectly untouched.

I tiptoed over to the peephole, I didn't want to appear to be too eager. I looked through and there he was looking around the hallways, probably silently praying no fans would catch him wandering the halls.

I opened the door and was greeted by his bright smile.

"Hey Mollie, can I come in?"

"No, you can stay out there."

He gave me a confused look with his eyebrows raised.

"I'm kidding! Sheesh, lighten up."

He laughed and came inside my room. Now that I got him to come see me... what do we do now?

"What have you been up to on this lovely night?" He asked before plopping on the bed.

"If I told you, I'm not sure you would believe me."

"Oh really? Try me, love."

Love? He was calling me love. God, I loved the British.

"Well, I performed on Jimmy Fallon."

"What? No. You're right. I don't believe that."

"And now..." I let my voice trail off and bit my lip. Okay, how would I explain this to him? If I were talking to Annie I would say I was hanging out with a cute boy that I was majorly crushing on... Obviously, I had no intention of telling that to him.

"And now?"

"And now I have Harry Styles in my room... which honestly is pretty terrifying."

"Terrifying?"

"Mmhmm.." I sat down next to him and he turned towards me searching my face, I could see him trying to figure me out. He possibly could even see right through me that I was so into him.

"I've been called a lot of things, Mollie. But terrifying has never been one of them."

Before I knew it was even happening I burst out into a giggle fit. The kind of giggles that send tears to your eyes. Only I could fuck up a perfect moment with a perfect boy. This is why I was chronically single for the majority of my life. Luckily, and much to my surprise Harry was laughing just as hard, and I think I even heard a snort.

After a couple of minutes, we both seemed to calm down a bit. I pulled a strand of long blonde hair behind my ear and wiped the tears from my eyes.

"Shit, I'm sorry. I'm just so awkward."

"A little. But, your down to Earth. That's one of the things I like about you."

"Really?"

"I really like you, Mollie Roark." His sweet voice was almost a whisper as he edged towards me, his tall frame encompassing my body, hands cupping my face ever so lightly.

"I really like you, Harry Styles." I vocalized a mere whisper back.

With a light chuckle, his brilliant lips parted and my heart skipped several beats.

And then, Harry Styles kissed me for the first time. It wasn't my first time ever being kissed. But it was my first time feeling slightly light headed from the entire thing. It was as if life just stopped as we knew it. I could feel his lips caress mine, in a sweet and sickeningly satisfying way, like when you take your first bite into a caramel apple. The caramel sparks a sense in your teeth, letting you know this will probably give you a cavity. But then you bite into the apple and the sourness balances it out. This is what kissing Harry Styles was like. So sweet, passionate, with a hint of lust. I thought I might just die from overwhelming emotions. This was only our first kiss, and I was instantly aware that this boy would break me. He had me wrapped around his finger, and I've only known him for two months.

Harry and I spent the next hour talking about his upcoming tour, watching stupid silly TV shows like Deadliest Catch, and him asking questions that would cause me to blush and prove how awkward I was.

That night wrapped in the hotels comfiest duvet and soft blankets, I curled up and got warm and cozy. For a while, I stared at the ceiling and reflected on what all had happened in this single night. Performing on Jimmy Fallon, hearing praise from my adoring family, and getting to know the real Harry, and kissing Harry. Eventually, I was able to calm down and go to sleep.

That night I dreamed of Harry. The next morning, I decided how to get rid of Harry.

#harry styles fan fiction #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles #harry styles writing #one direction #one direction fanfiction #one direction writing #1d fanfic #1d fanfiction #harry styles fanfic #spinningfields #spinning fields #sfch1 #wattpad

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gavlickgroup · 5 years

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Here’s What’s Happening in Tucson This Weekend!

Fri 7/19 - Sun 7/21

Happy Friday everyone! And still no monsoons! I think we're all looking forward to the rapid cooling of temperatures, the scent of creosote in the air, and that happy look the plants seem to adopt during the monsoon season. Let's hope we see it arrive this coming week.

MOONFEST! 50 years ago, on July 20, 1969, astronauts of Apollo 11 landed and walked on the moon's surface. For a brief moment in time, the whole world was united as we watched the event live on television. Flandrau celebrates this amazing story during Moon Landing Week.

TUCSON SAGUAROS VS. ALPINE COWBOYS

Tonight and tomorrow night, catch the Tucson Saguaro's as they take on the Texas Alpine Cowboys at Cherry Field. You can watch professionals play baseball for less than the price of a latte and danish at Starbucks!

FRIDAY NIGHT LIVE JAZZ AT MAIN GATE SQUARE

Music to make you happy, move your hips, tap your feet, drink, dance, sweat. Plus, not only are they stewards and curators of music for the soul, but they also contribute to the tradition with Muffuletta originals. The Muffulettas. Funky vocal music for the masses.

APPLE ANNIE'S ORCHARD Sweet corn, peaches, and watermelon are all featured at Apple Annie's Orchard this weekend.

ARIZONA ZIP-LINE ADVENTURES

Grill your own steak, BYOB, Live Music, and a Zip-line adventure. They all sound like fun but when you can do them all at one spot, even better. Tomorrow at Arizona Zip-line Adventures in Oracle.

NATIONAL ICE CREAM DAY

This Sunday, for those who like to try anything new, it's beer and ice-cream day at 1912 Brewing. We’ll have three 1912 Beers paired with three flavors of Isabella’s Ice Cream!

If you're out and about in the Sabino area this weekend, stop by our open house at 6655 N Canyon Crest #6232, or 10150 N Tall Cotton Drive in Marana and say hi!

Regardless of your plans this weekend, be careful in this heat! As always, please let us know if we can be of help to you or someone you know.

Warm Regards...Ann, Ron, Corilynn, and Daria

#Apple Annie's #1912 Brewing #National Ice Cream Day #MoonFest #Moon Week #Zip Line

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deniscollins · 4 years

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At Talkspace, Start-Up Culture Collides With Mental Health Concerns

What would you do if you were a Talkspace employer and realized the anxieties and depressing thoughts in the anonymous therapy case being shared as a learning example was actually that of a current employee also in the room: (1) nothing, (2) interrupt the presentation and verify that the case employer was okay with the group knowing of his inner psychological struggles that had been initially confidentially shared, (3) something else, if so, what? Why? What are the ethics underlying your decision?

In 2016, Ricardo Lori was an avid user of Talkspace — an app that lets people text and chat with a licensed therapist throughout the day. A part-time actor in New York City, Mr. Lori struggled with depression and anxiety, and he credited the app with helping him get out of an abusive relationship. He was a believer in Talkspace’s stated mission to make “therapy available and affordable for all,” and when the start-up offered him a job in its customer support department, Mr. Lori was ecstatic.

Talkspace, which has raised more than $100 million from investors, had an office in the old Studio 54 building in Midtown Manhattan, with all the usual perks — a Ping-Pong table in the conference room and beer and wine in the company fridge, plus all the therapy employees wanted. “I felt like I was at the best place in the world,” Mr. Lori said.

After he wrote a general account of his therapy sessions on the company blog, an executive named Linda Sacco came to Mr. Lori with an intimate request. She wanted to give employees a sense of a typical user’s experience. Could she and one of the company’s co-founders, Roni Frank, read through two weeks of his therapy chat logs and then share excerpts with the staff?

Mr. Lori thought about his sessions, which included deeply personal information about his sex life and insecurities. Ms. Sacco assured Mr. Lori that they would keep him anonymous. “If I wasn’t such a true believer, I probably would have said, ‘Are you nuts?’ But I was so enamored of the place,” said Mr. Lori. He agreed.

At an all-hands meeting on a Friday afternoon in December 2016, employees gathered in a 13th-floor conference room. The Ping-Pong table was folded up so that Ms. Sacco and Ms. Frank could sit on the floor, cross-legged and back-to-back, for a dramatic reading. Ms. Sacco played the role of the therapist; Ms. Frank played a female version of Mr. Lori.

As Mr. Lori drank a tall glass of red wine and watched, he noticed that a few employees kept glancing his way. Afterward, a member of the marketing department approached and asked if he was OK. Later, Oren Frank, Ms. Frank’s husband and the chief executive, thanked him in the elevator. Somehow, word had gotten around that Mr. Lori was the client in the re-enactment.

Mr. Lori began to reconsider whether Talkspace was the dream employer he’d imagined — and whether it could be trusted to protect the privacy of its users.

“Everything was done with employee-informed consent,” said Ms. Sacco, who no longer works at Talkspace. John Reilly, a lawyer for Talkspace, said, “At the time, the employee expressed great pride over their Talkspace treatment with their therapist, and willingly told multiple co-workers that the transcript was theirs.” Mr. Lori said he did so only after it became clear that his identity was widely known.

Despite the embarrassing episode, Mr. Lori stayed with the company for two more years, until he was let go in 2018. He sued Talkspace for discrimination and wrongful termination, claiming he was told that his anxiety and depression were interfering with his work. The lawsuit settled at the beginning of 2020. Mr. Lori asked the company to take down his blog post; the company didn’t, which is part of why Mr. Lori decided to share his story with a reporter.

Mr. Lori and other former Talkspace employees, who asked not to be named for fear of being sued, describe a company with an admirable ambition to destigmatize therapy — but that they say has questionable marketing practices and regards treatment transcripts as another data resource to be mined. Their accounts suggest that the needs of a venture capital-backed start-up to grow quickly can sometimes be in conflict with the core values of professional therapy, including strict confidentiality and patient welfare.

This year, with a pandemic, a recession and an election shredding Americans’ nerves, those concerns are relevant to more people than ever before: In May, Talkspace told The Washington Post that its client base had jumped 65 percent since mid-February.

“The app-ification of mental health care has real problems,” said Hannah Zeavin, a lecturer in the English department at the University of California, Berkeley whose book about teletherapy is scheduled to be published next year by MIT Press. “These are corporate platforms first. And they offer therapy second.”

“Talkspace has democratized access to therapy and psychiatry by meeting patients where they are in their lives and making treatment more affordable,” said Neil Leibowitz, Talkspace’s chief medical officer. “The need is profound, especially now in this time of unease, and we are so proud of what our team of therapists is achieving.”

Burner phones

Signing up with Talkspace is quick. Users create an account, fill out a questionnaire, and get a choice of therapists, who work for the platform as independent contractors. Those who sign up for the “Unlimited Messaging Therapy Plus” plan, at $260 a month, can send a therapist messages at any time and are promised daily responses. Higher-priced subscription tiers offer “live sessions” of 30 minutes. While users can send messages by text, audio and video, Talkspace is known popularly as a platform for texting.

The company was founded in 2011 by Oren and Roni Frank, an Israeli couple who felt inspired after their relationship was “saved” by marriage counseling. Mr. Frank had a background in marketing, and Ms. Frank was a software developer.

Ms. Frank is the company’s head of clinical services; as of Aug. 6, her LinkedIn page said she had a master’s degree in psychoanalysis and psychotherapy from the New York Graduate School of Psychoanalysis, but she never completed the program. The degree claim was deleted after an inquiry from The Times. Mr. Reilly said Ms. Frank “studied for an M.A. but left her program before completion to launch Talkspace. Her LinkedIn profile was created while she was studying, the inadvertent error was corrected as soon as the NYT brought this to our attention.”

The app launched in 2014 to positive press but lukewarm customer reviews, with ratings of about three stars out of five on both the Google and Apple app stores, according to a Times analysis. Users complained about glitchy software and unresponsive therapists.

In 2015 and 2016, according to four former employees, the company sought to improve its ratings: It asked workers to write positive reviews. One employee said that Talkspace’s head of marketing at the time asked him to compile 100 fake reviews in a Google spreadsheet, so that employees could submit them to app stores.

Mr. Lori said that Talkspace gave employees “burner” phones to help evade the app stores’ techniques for detecting false reviews. “They said, ‘Don’t do it here. Do it at home. Give us five-star ratings because we have too many bad reviews,’” Mr. Lori said.

Mr. Reilly, the Talkspace lawyer, disputed this account, saying that employees were free to write reviews any way they liked. “We alerted employees if they were to leave a review, to do it from their personal phones — not from the Talkspace office network, as that would cause issues with the app store,” Mr. Reilly said in an emailed statement. “To be clear: We have never used fake identities or encouraged anybody to do so; there is no event involving ‘burner’ phones, and the idea in and of itself is nonsensical relative to the large number of reviews outstanding.”

Mr. Lori still has the iPhone 4 that Talkspace gave him. On the back, there is a white sticker on which someone has written “#7 App Store login,” along with a Yahoo email address and password. Two other former employees said burner phones were made available to workers.

“Fake reviews are deceptive to consumers,” said Eric Goldman, co-director of the High Tech Law Institute at Santa Clara University. If the Talkspace employees didn’t disclose their role when leaving reviews, “then the company-encouraged reviews are problematic on multiple legal fronts,” Mr. Goldman said.

Posting fake online reviews is considered a deceptive business practice and can violate laws against false advertising. The New York attorney general and the Federal Trade Commission have fined companies for posting such reviews, though consequences can also be less severe. After the F.T.C. accused the cosmetics brand Sunday Riley of posting fake reviews, it simply made the company agree not to do so again.

Google and Apple forbid developers from soliciting fraudulent reviews. Apple says violators may have their apps removed from the App Store.

Irreverence unusual to health care

Talkspace has also seized on moments of national anxiety as opportunities for promotion. On Nov. 9, 2016, the morning after the election of Donald Trump, Mr. Frank wrote on Twitter: “Long night in NYC. Woke up this morning to record sales.” The company told reporters that users were flocking to the app to help process the news. CNBC and The Washington Post published stories about Talkspace’s “7-fold spike in traffic,” and Mr. Frank shared a Fast Company link claiming a “7x spike in sales.”

According to data from two app analytics firms, App Annie and Sensor Tower, the number of Talkspace downloads declined in the months after the election. The Times analyzed more than 3,600 reviews of the Talkspace app. There was no significant increase in the number of reviews, positive or negative, following the 2016 election.

Dr. Leibowitz, Talkspace’s chief medical officer, who joined the company in 2018, said in an email: “We saw an uptick in use after the election, including, as the piece mentions, an uptick in traffic from existing clients concerned about election results. App analytics fail to capture a few elements: Much of our traffic is on the web.”

The Trump election tweets are examples of the sometimes unfiltered social media presence of Mr. Frank and Talkspace — an irreverence familiar among start-ups but unusual among organizations devoted to mental health care.

In 2016, a man named Ross complained on Twitter that the company’s subway ads “were designed to trigger you into needing their services.” Talkspace’s official Twitter account responded, “Ads for food make people hungry, right?” and added, “I get what you’re saying, Ross, but medical professionals need people to buy things.” The company later deleted the messages and blocked the man. (Ross wrote about the exchange in a Medium post; when The Times asked for comment recently, he deleted it and asked that his full name be withheld, citing personal reasons.)

From his own Twitter account, Mr. Frank called the man a “sweet bored troll” and mocked him for spending $20,000 a year on therapy, saying Talkspace could offer “a more affordable alternative.” The company declined to comment about the episode.

‘We need data. All of our data.’

Therapy sessions are incredibly sensitive by their nature — they are intended to be a sacrosanct space for people to confess their secrets and share their deepest vulnerabilities.

Talkspace’s website promises users that their conversations will be “safe and confidential,” but people may not have as much control as they might think over what happens to their data. Users can’t delete their transcripts, for example, because they are considered medical records.

Talkspace’s privacy policy states that “non-identifying and aggregate information” may be used “to better design our website” and “in research and trend analysis.” The impression left is a detached and impersonal process. But former employees and therapists told The Times that individual users’ anonymized conversations were routinely reviewed and mined for insights.

Karissa Brennan, a New York-based therapist, provided services via Talkspace from 2015 to 2017, including to Mr. Lori. She said that after she provided a client with links to therapy resources outside of Talkspace, a company representative contacted her, saying she should seek to keep her clients inside the app.

“I was like, ‘How do you know I did that?’” Ms. Brennan said. “They said it was private, but it wasn’t.”

The company says this would only happen if an algorithmic review flagged the interaction for some reason — for example, if the therapist recommended medical marijuana to a client. Ms. Brennan says that to the best of her recollection, she had sent a link to an anxiety worksheet.

Talkspace also has been analyzing transcripts in order to develop bots that monitor and augment therapists’ work. During a presentation in 2019, a Talkspace engineer specializing in machine learning said the research was important because certain cues that a client is in distress that could be caught during in-person sessions might be missed when a therapist is only communicating by text. Software might better catch those cues.

Last year, Mr. Frank wrote an opinion article for The Times encouraging people to make their health data available to researchers. “We need data. All of our data. Mine and yours,” he wrote, arguing that analysis of anonymous data sets could improve treatment.

The anonymous data Talkspace collects is not used just for medical advancements; it’s used to better sell Talkspace’s product. Two former employees said the company’s data scientists shared common phrases from clients’ transcripts with the marketing team so that it could better target potential customers.

The company disputes this. “We are a data-focused company, and data science and clinical leadership will from time to time share insights with their colleagues,” Mr. Reilly said. “This can include evaluating critical information that can help us improve best practices.”

He added: “It never has and never will be used for marketing purposes.”

‘Engagement’-based therapy

Many licensed therapists sign up with Talkspace for reasons similar to why drivers work for Uber. The company provides a steady stream of clients, takes care of administrative tasks and deals with some insurance issues.

“The beauty of text-based therapy is we are meeting clients where they are, and giving them access to something different,” said Reshawna Chapple, a Talkspace therapist whom the company made available for an interview. “It’s about convenience for me.”

“The thing that Talkspace allows me to do is to put my hands in a lot of different pots,” said Dr. Chapple, who communicates with 30 clients via Talkspace, treats 15 in person, and works as a full-time professor at the University of Central Florida. She also has a contract with Talkspace to advise other therapists.

The approximately 3,000 therapists who work on the platform are paid by “engagement,” according to the company, based on the number of words they write to users or how often they talk by video or audio, with bonuses for client retention.

According to multiple therapists, Talkspace paid special attention to their interactions with clients who worked at places like Google, Kroger and JetBlue — “enterprise partners” that provide Talkspace to employees as a perk. (The New York Times offers Talkspace to its workers as a benefit.)

A college professor who provided therapy via Talkspace for two years said the company reached out to her when it thought two clients from Google had been waiting too long for a response.

“Like all businesses, we focus on clients based on size and scope,” said Dr. Leibowitz, the chief medical officer.

Last year, Talkspace introduced a new feature: a button that users could press after sending a message that required the therapist to respond within a certain time frame. If the therapists don’t respond in time, their pay can be docked.

Some therapists on the platform were alarmed, in part because the function required them to work on demand, rather than on their own schedule. More significantly, they asked: Is it harmful to give clients with anxiety and boundary issues a button to press for immediate gratification?

“That’s a corporate model: You need to respond to the customer no matter what,” said Shara Sand, a psychologist with her own practice in New York. “Limit-setting and boundary-setting is part of the therapy. If you can’t manage not to talk to your therapist for four hours, you are very ill and need a higher level of care than a texting app.”

Pushback on clinical benefits

Talkspace is advertised to users as unlimited, “24/7” messaging therapy. “Your therapist will see your messages and respond to you throughout the day,” the company says. Therapists get a different pitch: “Set your business hours, and check in on your clients daily, five days per week.”

The company says the two messages are not in conflict. “I don’t think it’s a discrepancy in expectations,” said Rachel O’Neill, a licensed therapist at Talkspace whose title is director of clinical effectiveness. “It’s not 24/7 therapy, it’s 24/7 ability to communicate.”

Some traditional mental health professionals question the free-flowing format, saying that the benefits of therapy stem from regular, scheduled check-ins — sessions with clear beginnings and endings that help mark progress.

“It’s called the ‘frame’ in psychoanalysis. It’s the room. It’s how long the session will last. How much it will cost,” said Berkeley’s Ms. Zeavin. “Boundaries are really important to the history of therapy. If texting is equated with no boundaries, that’s a real problem.”

There has been limited study into how effective teletherapy is. Much of it either has been conducted by Talkspace itself or has involved therapy via video sessions, not just text.

“Talkspace’s No. 1 priority is quality of care for patients and driving the clinical outcomes desired by patients,” Dr. Leibowitz said. “Talkspace has conducted research in partnership with many of the top academic universities,” he said, adding that the work has yielded “10 vetted papers in peer-reviewed journals.”

Lynn Bufka, the senior director for practice transformation and quality at the American Psychological Association, or A.P.A., said the research on text-based therapy has been based on surveys of whether people find it satisfactory.

“There’s been much less research into whether there’s a clinical benefit,” Dr. Bufka said. “We would offer cautions around relying on text therapy, particularly when there is greater severity in terms of symptoms. We would urge people to seek direct care, which at this time would be by phone or video.”

In 2018, a therapists advocacy group called the Psychotherapy Action Network wrote a letter to the A.P.A. and to the Olympian Michael Phelps, who has appeared in ads for Talkspace, calling the company a “problematic treatment provider who aggressively sells an untested, risky treatment.” After receiving the letter, the A.P.A. changed its policy on therapy-tech ads and stopped letting Talkspace exhibit at conferences.

In 2019, after Talkspace signed a deal with Optum, a unit of the health care giant UnitedHealth, to provide teletherapy to its two million customers, the advocacy group wrote another letter of “alarm” to the A.P.A. Talkspace sued the group for defamation, claiming damages of $40 million. The lawsuit was dismissed for jurisdictional reasons.

“Maybe their products and services are helpful to certain people,” said Linda Michaels, a founder of the Psychotherapy Action Network. “But it’s just not therapy.”

Until 2018, the Talkspace user agreement said the same thing: “This Site Does Not Provide Therapy. It provides Therapeutic conversation with a licensed therapist.” The company has since removed the clause.

“That is very old,” Dr. Leibowitz said. “The company has evolved quite a bit.”

Mr. Lori no longer uses the Talkspace app. But he is still seeing the therapist, Ms. Brennan, whom he originally met via the platform.

“Even through this toxic company, wonderful things can happen,” he said. “It’s such a sad story in totality, of what the company could have been versus what it is.”

Susan Beachy contributed research.

#Talkspace

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celtfather · 6 years

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Rainy Day in the Celtic Nations #357

There's nothing like dancing in the rain with awesome Celtic music from Dun Aengus, Na Rosai, Gwendolyn Snowdown, Breabach, Lunasa, Spirited Lads, Ginger Ackley, Moonrakers, IONA, Jim Sharkey, Colleen Raney, The High Kings, David Pedrick, Trinity River Whalers, Runa, The Gothard Sisters. http://celticmusicpodcast.com/

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uniquequotesonlife · 4 years

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10 Best Movies of 2019 (So Far)

With the summer movie season winding down, we look back at the top 10 films cinema has had to offer this far into 2019.