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endureandplay · 4 years

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The Last of Us 2 - Symbolism of Eyes

---MAJOR SPOILER WARNING----

I would like to talk about something that really stuck with me after playing The Last of Us 2, and which really made me think a lot. This is gonna be a loong post lol. Not sure anybody will read this.

We know that the motto of the Fireflys is "When you're lost in the darkness, look for the light." Quite obviously, the ongoing problem addressed in The Last of Us 2 is that our characters “have stopped looking for the light.” The game revolves around blind hate, revenge and retaliation. And loss as the origin of those.

Ellie’s journal entries are as dark as can be. Most of them are dedicated to Joel of course. You’ll probably have noticed that she never draws his eyes. All she does is practice drawing eyes a lot. What’s more, she keeps talking about feeling blind herself, she says she’s lost the light.

For me, it’s like she doesn’t see any hope, no joy, no future in which she can find true happiness ever again. She’s *had* this hope. She wanted to forgive Joel for what he did, start anew. They’ve wasted a lot of time because Ellie understandably couldn’t forgive him so easily for what he’s done. At the end of the game, we get to see the last conversation that happened between them, the night before Joel dies. In this conversation, Ellie tells him that she “would like to try” to forgive him. And that’s probably the moment they reconnected after years of distance, tension and resentment. Ellie speaks of this last conversation in one of her early journal entries:

I was thinking about the meaning of Ellie not being able to draw his eyes. One that came to my mind is that whenever she tries to imagine them, all she can see is his disfigured face right before he dies.

Ellie looked him in the eyes and begged for him to get up. It was the last time they really looked each other in the eyes, had this connection, maybe saw all the things they went through together flash before them right before it was taken away from them. We find out that she has PTSD or something very similar to it when she lives on the farm with Dina. She can’t get the images out of her head:

Despite them having other people in their lives after settling in Jackson, they complemented and gave each other what they needed the most.

Despite Ellie saying it, we know that they they could never be done with each other, because too much connects them. That’s what the first game was all about, after all.

Ellie had hurt Joel over and over again. He’s not a hero, but we love him, because we love Ellie, and because we can understand why he did what he did. And Ellie does too. Her pain and hurt is just as understandable. She met him with almost cruel resentment and rejection all the time, got angry at him for small things, even when he meant well (like after she kissed Dina).

It’s this fight they had that she remembers right before deciding to finish what she’s started, to find Abby and kill her. When she couldn’t sleep on that farm, she got up, went to her room, closed the window, knocked over the guitar and thought of that night.

And I don’t think this is all about revenge. I think Ellie feels deeply guilty for having been to him that way, because she understands how much she means to him, and because she understands how deeply hurt and broken he is himself. She never wanted things to be like this between them, and she just wanted to forgive him in the end - she loves him and understands his pain better than anybody else.

But she never got to get things right. This chance was taken away from them, her forgiveness came “too late”. I think Ellie is so deeply broken herself, and I feel like she hates herself. Hates that she was the one who didn’t turn when Riley did. That her life only would have mattered if they killed her to make a cure. All these years, she was mean and cruel toward him. Now he’s dead, and part of her wants to make it up to him.

By wanting to kill Abby, she doesn’t only want to avenge Joel, she wants to redeem herself.

Notice how she can’t draw Joel’s and Abby’s eyes, but she can draw JJ’s and Jesse’s eyes?

I think that that she can’t draw their eyes has a good reason. With Joel, it’s not only that she can’t get the images out of her head. I also don’t think it’s because she can’t remember what he looked like - I think she can. All too well.

I think it’s because if she imagined his eyes before her, it’s like Joel would reflect everything she does and did. His eyes would “stare” at her, as she wrote in one journal entry, but then she replaced it with “smile”. She associates him with warmth and love, but what she does is losing herself. And he’d never want that. She does things that deeply traumatize her more and more. She tortures people, kills a pregnant woman. Looking him in the eyes would mean reflecting on her actions and on herself. Putting loved ones at risk and prioritizing revenge while neglecting her family and other relationships. Looking him in the eyes would mean for her to acknowledge that Joel would never condone that. He’s gone and nothing she does can change it. And he’d want her to be safe and stay true to herself and her values. Not be blinded by hate and grief.

Abby’s eyes represent something similar. Ellie knows that Joel crossed a lot of people. She knows he killed hundreds of people, especially Fireflys, including Marlene (although we don’t know if she knows that). She knows that he did a lot of bad shit in the past. Abby and her friends spared Ellie and Tommy, and that indicates that they aren’t universally bad people. Even when Dina asks Ellie what she thinks why they spared them, Ellie doesn’t want to talk about it and says that it doesn’t matter. But it does.

And she’s avoiding and denying this gray area. She’s dividing the world into good and bad now, disregarding everything in between. Even in the end, when she sees that Abby is just a normal human being like Ellie is, taking care of Lev, she feels obliged to kill her.

Jesse and JJ don’t represent her blind hate. They represent the love and people in her life that still make her happy and care about her. The life she could have, if she were able to “leave it all behind”. She doesn’t associate them with pain and loss.

Only when she finally has the choice to kill Abby, she remembers the last conversation she had with Joel - and it was about forgiveness. But it was not only about deciding to forgive him. It was about understanding that the world isn’t as simple as good and bad, black or white. People are more than that, just like Joel was neither a hero, nor a villain. Just like Abby is neither a hero nor a villain.

Of course, by deciding to break the cycle of revenge, which is the most obvious topic in the game, she spares Lev of going through the same pain Ellie and Abby did. But I think something deep inside her forgives Abby for what she’s done. I think Ellie understands that Abby isn’t just a bad person, just like Joel wasn’t. By stopping there, Ellie undergoes the growth not to be like Abby and kill the one who’s responsible for her loss, just like Abby grew and decided not to kill Dina despite the fact that Ellie killed Mel.

And she finally lets her mask slip. When she decides to let Abby live, she finally accepts that Joel is dead and “reconciles” with him. She decides not to turn into something she’s not and let her grief and hate get the better of her. Ellie understands what she’s done, the mistake she’s made. How she’s lost herself and how she wronged Dina.

And that’s when she can finally draw his eyes.

#the last of us #the last of us 2 #thelastouf2 #tlou2 #tlou #tlou ellie #joel and ellie #ellie x dina #ellie miller #ellie the last of us #Abby tlou #Abbyanderson #abby anderson #neildruckman #ashley johnson #troy baker #thelastofus #the last of us part two #the last of us part II

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abbysfrenchbraid · 4 years

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Little Harbor - Beach Day Part 2

Thank you all for the lovely feedback on my writing so far, it means so much to me. I’ve decided that the Beach Day Imagine needed a Part 2 and spent last night manically writing 6.6k words of fluff, angst and semi smut.

In this part, Abby and the reader finally make their trip to Little Harbor and spend the night at the cabin there. The reader finds out they don’t know everything about Abby and there are some things in her past that still weigh heavily on her mind.

TW for death/loss (Seattle plot for the Salt Lake Squad), light nudity, language and mention of suicide and mention of blood

This ist the playlist I curated for this fic. Make sure you disable shuffle and listen to the songs in order for them to fit! (It’s called Little Harbor on Spotify and has a picture of Abby in the thumbnail)

Little Harbor

The last few days had been a blur of happiness and secrecy. Stolen kisses in empty hallways, sitting next to each other in the cafeteria with your knees touching, sunsets in the watchtower staircase, and sweaty hugs whenever you picked up Abby after her morning training. It was clear to you by now that there was no going back and no stopping this. You were absolutely, hopelessly falling for the tall blonde soldier and she actually seemed to feel the same, which was still unbelievable to you.

Abby had taken up work with some of the combat and strategy trainers, educating them on the different groups she had encountered on her journey and on their territory, tactics, and relationships with each other. Lev had come in to explain more about the Seraphites, their whistle language, and their infrastructure. Even though it was unlikely that the Seraphites or WLF would come knocking at the Fireflies’ door, they still wanted to know as much as possible about the current state of the world.

The Rattlers were a different story altogether. Lev refused to speak about them and even though Abby had told the Firefly leaders about them as soon as she was conscious after her emergency surgeries, there was still much to talk about. She tried as hard as she could to remember every little detail and she got incredibly frustrated with herself when she found gaps in her memory even though that wasn’t her fault. The torture and mistreatment at the hands of these bastards had been so immensely traumatizing that her mind refused to let her remember the worst parts.

While the past few days with her had been all fun and exciting, the evenings had been more difficult and it had taken a lot of strength from both of you to get through this together. Abby was just learning to confide in you and talk about her feelings while you struggled with being there for her the right way, having never experienced anything close to the terror she must have felt. After the first day in the strategy room, Abby had knocked on your door just as you were about to go to bed and practically fallen apart in your arms. The Fireflies had decided to send a few teams back to Santa Barbara to see if there were any survivors and capture or help the people they found, depending on their previous alliance. They had offered Abby to go back with them, which she declined, and made it clear that she had to try to identify every single person they brought back.

You just hoped that the only people left there were the other prisoners who had freed themselves. It would be horrifying to know that some of the torturers could soon be sitting somewhere in this very building, practically at arm’s reach from Abby and Lev.

Although the others had advised her not to, Abby had told Lev about all the plans and tasks to come and he had agreed to help identifying people but remained silent about his thoughts on all this.

Trying your best to make Abby’s first week as an official Firefly less hard on her, you had organized a mission for you both to go to Little Harbor. You were supposed to check up on the little cabin there, throw out anything that wasn’t necessary and stock it with a few supplies in case someone in the area needed them in the future. The best thing about Little Harbor was the beautiful beach that stretched in a perfect arc and had the most beautiful sunsets you had ever seen.

You had just talked to your friend in admin and gotten the confirmation for the mission. For a second, you debated telling Abby at lunch in an hour but you simply couldn’t wait. Rolling up the note with the assignment on it and shoving it in your back pocket, you rushed toward the east wing of the base, practically jumping with every step.

As you came closer to the strategy room, you heard muffled voices. There seemed to be a heated discussion. You really didn’t want to eavesdrop, but you were already at the door and didn’t feel like you should knock and interrupt them in the middle of their conversation.

“Oh come on, Abby, what are you not telling us? You have to know more about her than that!”

“I’m telling you, I don’t know where they lived and I don’t know where she is now! I met them the first time at the WLF outpost in the middle of nowhere around Seattle and the last time I saw her she was in Santa Barbara. She’s probably dead, anyway, she was injured and all alone.”

She? Who were they talking about? Abby had never told you about a woman in Santa Barbara. Maybe another prisoner?

Someone slammed a hand on the table.

“Jesus Christ, I can’t believe we lost her again after all this time. At least we know Joel paid for what he did at Salt Lake.”

This sparked your attention. You knew Abby had grown up at the Salt Lake outpost before the massacre. Was Joel the guy who killed all the Fireflies there, including the doctors?

“What do you want with her anyway?” That was Abby again. She sounded bitter. “It’s not like we have the means to make a vaccine, Joel made sure of that. You’ll see what she did with the rattlers when you get there. Maybe you’ll find her body, too, and I can finally have some fucking peace.”

There was silence for a brief moment. Then a woman said: “Alright, let’s take a break. The teams are driving out to Santa Barbara tomorrow, then we’ll see what we find. Abby, thank you for everything you’ve told us. Take some time for yourself, I’ll call for you when the reports are in and hopefully a few survivors, too. I’ll see the rest of you after lunch.”

You could hear feet shuffling and chairs being pushed around. Quickly, you tiptoed away from the door and halfway through the corridor, then you turned around just as the door opened. Abby came out first, frowning and with her hands balled into firsts. When she saw you, her face lit up and she relaxed, taking a few big steps towards you and awkwardly coming to a halt in front of you, just a little bit too close.

“Perfect timing, huh?” She smiled at you before nodding to a few others that passed you.

You forced yourself to focus and smiled back.

“Yeah, I came to tell you that our mission is approved. We can leave as soon as possible.”

“Oh, that’s great! Martha just said I could have the day off and probably need to report back in tomorrow night earliest. Should we just pack now and get going after lunch?”

“Good idea. Say we meet in the cafeteria in 15?” you suggested.

Abby nodded. “See you there.”

As you packed your backpack, you tried to process what you had just heard. Abby knew the man who had run amok at the Firefly Hospital and apparently he was dead now. There had been another woman in Santa Barbara, and she had something to do with a possible vaccine? You knew the Fireflies had been extremely invested in the search for a vaccine after the outbreak, but they had given up on it a long time ago. Now they just tried to build safe zones without any infected in order to build communities of Fireflies, other survivors, and anyone else who wanted to join you.

Why were the others so keen on finding the other woman? What did Abby have to do with Joel and the massacre at the hospital? And why was this whole thing still affecting her so badly after all those years?

You wanted to try to talk to Abby later and find out what had gone down in Santa Barbara and at Salt Lake, but you also knew she had been waiting for this day to finally come so she could get out of here and distract herself for a while. Who were you to ruin this by forcing her to relive her trauma all over again?

Closing the zipper on your backpack and throwing it over your shoulder, you decided to just take it a step at a time. First, you had to get some food into your stomach.

Abby was excited about the trip and spent almost the whole meal asking you questions about the bay and the cabin. She told you she had spent some time in cabins up in Washington with her old WLF crew, but it had been snowing back then and the summer here was just an entirely different experience.

Lev was a bit sad he couldn’t go with you, but you promised him a beach bonfire in the next two weeks. He was way too happy about his new friends and tasks to sulk about your little duo mission. The boy was a fantastic archer and was now tasked with teaching his craft to younger trainees and older soldiers. He was delighted at being taken so seriously by adults for the first time in his life. His lessons at school were going well apparently, he enjoyed history and biology a lot.

Abby was attentively listening to him talking about crop diversification and the produce grown here during the different seasons as a group of fully-equipped soldiers came into the cafeteria. They seemed excited about their mission and were making a ton of noise, jeering and shoving each other around as they picked up their rations for the next two days from the serving counter. Abby and Lev both went quiet, poking around in their food and seeming to be holding their breaths until the squad had left.

Lev suddenly looked up at Abby with tears in his eyes.

“Do you think any of the Rattlers survived?” His voice was high pitched and he sounded like he was about to choke.

“Oh, Lev.” The blonde put her arm around his shoulder, her hands looking huge on his small frame. “I have no idea, I’m so sorry. I’m pretty sure the other prisoners were freed and got their revenge. She also freed some of the walkers in the area. It must have been bad. We’ll just have to wait and see, but I promise they’ll never lay a hand on you ever again.”

There she was again, the mysterious woman. Now you’d at least have a valid reason to bring it up. The boy sighed, then he wiped his eyes with the back of his hand and straightened up. He waved over to a few other kids waiting at the exit.

“I need to go. Math class.” He grimaced and you and Abby both had to laugh. No one enjoyed math, but a certain basic knowledge was necessary for everyone here.

“See you tomorrow, Lev. I’ll bring her back safely,” you promised him and Abby rolled her eyes at you, but he gave you a genuinely thankful nod before tapping her shoulder as a goodbye and running over to his friends.

Abby smiled at you, her eyes lighting up as she remembered your plans for the day.

“You ready to go?” she asked, standing up and grabbing her backpack.

“Let’s get out of here.” You put on your backpack as well, took your plates and placed them in a plastic tub next to the counter.

In the empty corridor leading to the garage, Abby snuck her fingers between yours, sending sparks over your skin and making butterflies dance in your stomach. She pulled you toward her and after a quick glance left and right, she gave you a soft peck on the lips. You reacted instantly, burying your fingers in her hair and pulling her in for a second kiss, this time less innocent. Abby chuckled and grabbed your shoulder to push you away just a few inches and look you in the eyes.

You felt yourself blush and rubbed a hand over your eyes.

“Ugh, sorry, I just missed you all morning. Let’s just go.”

Grabbing her hand and pulling her with you, you entered the garage and quickly said hello to your coworkers before checking out the keys and leading Abby to your truck. Your colleagues didn’t lose a single word about the hand-holding and you were thankful for their discretion. They were your closest friends at the base and they knew you’d tell them more as soon as you were ready.

The drive out to the cabin took about an hour, one which you spent in blissful silence. You had rolled the windows down again and just like the last time, the summer air was whirling through the cabin and playing with your hair. Abby let an arm hang out of her window and took in the view of the different hills and forest patches, the beaches, and the beautiful meadows. She looked serene, completely at peace with herself and the world.

When you arrived at the cabin, it was better than you had remembered. The little wooden cottage was still in good shape, firewood was stacked up at the back and there was a small front porch with a perfect view of the bay in front of you. Two wooden chairs and a table stood on the porch, completely grown over with moss.

You fumbled with the keys for a second, then you were inside. All the curtains were drawn, bathing the dusty room in heavy yellow light before you opened them and looked around. Abby was still standing at the doorstep, uncertain of what to do.

The room was perfectly equipped with a little kitchen unit, a table with four chairs, a worn-out striped couch, and a decently sized bed, luckily covered with a big sheet to stop it from getting unbearably dusty. A narrow door in the corner seemed to lead to a bathroom. You put your hands on your hips and turned to Abby.

“Well, what do you think? Too dusty for your liking?”

The blonde snapped out of her astonishment.

“Are you kidding me? Y/N, it’s great! It looks so cozy, I think I’m gonna sleep better than I have for months.” She took a few steps toward you and wrapped her hands around your waist. “Especially when I’m sleeping next to you.”

“Oh, I thought you were gonna take the couch,” you said dryly. Abby’s eyes widened and you could tell she seriously thought she had overstepped until you wrapped your arms around her neck and snorted, immediately receiving a playful push backward that you put up with by holding on to her for dear life.

“You’re an asshole,” she laughed, “I got scared there for a second!” She planted a kiss on your lips and picked you up by your waist, making you squeal.

“I’m sorry, Abby, ahh! Please let me down!” you begged but you had to admit this was fun. The taller woman gently put you back on your feet, then she said: “Come on, let’s get settled here.”

She opened the windows while you tried the tap unsuccessfully before pulling the cover off the bed and revealing buttercup yellow sheets. Sweet. Abby used a towel to wipe the dust off the table before setting her bag on it and offering to take yours as well. She put all the supplies in the kitchen cabinet before announcing that she was going to find you some water.

“When you go outside, there should be a pump on the left side of the house. Make sure to pump for a while until you touch the water, it’s got to be disgusting,” you said as you started sweeping the floor with a broom.

“Yeah, I know how a cistern works, thanks.” She rolled her eyes at you. A minute later, you could hear the squeaking of the old metal pump and the gurgle of water seeing daylight for the first time in years. You put the broom in the corner and wiped your hands on your jeans. The bed looked inviting, but the beach called to you even louder. You could feel that this night would have a lasting impact on your life and your relationship with Abby.

After checking on the roof and the cistern, you made your way down to the beach and spent the afternoon swimming, reading, and chasing each other around. One time Abby actually tackled you too hard and you got sand everywhere - your mouth, your nose, your eyes, even under your bathing suit. Abby couldn’t stop apologizing and telling you how sorry she was and how she underestimated her own strength but you swore vengeance for later and laughed it off. In order to get rid of all the sand underneath your suit, you went into the water and took it off before whirling it around over your head and getting Abby all flustered.

You secretly wanted her to join you, but she seemed to be too timid to go that fast so you put your bathing suit back on and let yourself flop down next to her, purposely splashing water on her and making her squeal as the cold drops hit her hot skin. Following an impulse, you rolled over and on top of her, pressing your cold, wet body on her soft, warm back. This time, she forced herself to stay still and not throw you around again, instead resorting to cursing you and calling you an atrocious little eel, only making you laugh harder.

After a while, she gave up on fighting you and you rested your cheek on her warm shoulder, humming in satisfaction. This was nice. It would be even better when you’d lie next to her in bed.

The afternoon seemed to go on forever, time standing still as you two forgot all your worries and enjoyed living in this little bubble of sun, sea and happiness. Then, finally, the sun hung low over the sea, drenching the world in golden light and painting the water orange and the clouds pink. It was an explosion of light and color, the pure beauty you could only find in nature. Or in the person you loved most.

Looking over at Abby, you saw she was also watching the waves and the clouds, the soft light illuminating the tiny hairs on her face and arms and making the dried salt crystals that stuck to her skin glint like little diamonds. Her dark blonde hair was swaying in the slight breeze and her cheeks had a faint red tinge from the sun. She was mesmerizing.

You moved closer to her and drew your nose along her jawline, breathing on her neck and placing tiny kisses behind her ear and on her temple until she was humming and leaning into your touch. She slowly turned her head and grazed your open mouth with hers before running the tip of her tongue over your upper lip. She opened her eyes.

“This really is the most beautiful place I’ve ever seen. Nothing has ever made me feel like this,” she mumbled without drawing back.

“I’m glad you like it. I’ve been wanting to show it to you for a while.”

“I wish you would have shown me sooner. But I’m really happy you’re doing it now.” She turned her torso towards you and brushed her fingers over your thigh, leaving goosebumps in their wake. You could see the specks of gold in her iris, reflecting the last rays of sunlight and making her look ethereal and otherworldly. Oh god, how in the world had you found her? How had she found you? This was too good to be true, but you wanted to believe that it was, to believe that this moment could last forever.

In a desperate attempt to tell her all this, the beautiful chaos in your heart and your head that started spinning when you were with her, you leaned forward and kissed her. Hard, like you were scared this wasn’t real or it could be your last, then softer when you felt Abby tense up in surprise. She opened her mouth for you and you dragged your tongue against hers, tasting hints of salt and the fruit you had had earlier. You became more confident and placed your hand on her inner thigh which she took in with a gasp before grabbing the back of your neck and pulling you closer, her tongue now more forceful and demanding.

You couldn’t take the space between you any longer and crawled on top of her, straddling her hips as you looked down at her face, her green eyes half-closed and her mouth hanging open. The sun had said its farewells and vanished behind the horizon and the atmosphere created by the dusk suddenly hit you full force. Abby’s face was still softly lit by the pink clouds behind you while the sky behind her was a dark, heavy blue fading to black in the distance. She looked like a fucking painting.

“I’m so glad I found you,“ you whispered, running your fingers through her hair.

Abby answered by wrapping her arms around you and pulling you in. She kissed you with a burning passion, gentle but daring, sweet but hot, encasing you with her body and her mouth and pressing you so close that there wasn’t an inch left between you.

As she moved her hands down your body, pulling your hips closer and caressing your legs, she noticed the goosebumps all over your body and halted for a second.

“Are you cold, baby?”

You wanted to say no, but you had to admit you were starting to shiver under your still slightly damp swimming suit and wet hair, the evening breeze dancing around you and mocking you for getting so lost in the moment that you forgot everything around you.

“I really am,” you sighed, “maybe we could get some blankets and food and start a fire?”

Abby nodded and you struggled to your feet, feeling very naked and small all of a sudden. The blonde noticed your change of behavior and immediately got up next to you. She grabbed your books and towels and wrapped her dry one around your shoulders, rubbing up and down your arms a few times to warm you up before pulling you in for a tight hug.

“Come on, let’s get you inside and warmed up.”

Inside the cabin, Abby managed to light an oil lamp and fill the room with a wonderfully soft, yellow light. She slowly walked toward you and came to a halt right in front of you. Gently, she placed her hands on your shoulders and took the towel, placing it on a chair beside you. Then she hooked a finger under the strap of your swimsuit and slowly pulled it over your shoulder and down your arm, never breaking eye contact. Both of you were breathing heavily, the air between you felt like sirup and the world seemed to stop turning.

You laid a hand on top of Abby’s and moved with her, dragging the strap down your arm to expose a slight tan line and a hard nipple standing out into the cold air. Abby still hadn’t moved her eyes from yours, helping you pull your arm out of the strap and slowly pulling down the other one until your entire chest was bare. You could feel another rush of goosebumps chasing over your entire body while hot blood shot into your face and painted your cheeks in a deep red.

You both took a deep breath simultaneously, then you nodded at the tall woman in front of you. She lowered her eyes to your breasts and let out a shaky breath, then she raised a hand and drew her fingertips over your collarbone, down your ribs, and up between your breasts before brushing over your sensitive nipples and finally using both hands to cup your breasts. She stepped closer and bent her head to kiss you. You melted into her, her hands now all over your body, her hot skin on your cold flesh, and her mouth on yours before attacking your throat, making you throw your head back and let out an ecstatic moan.

Suddenly, Abby’s hands were on your ass and she picked you up effortlessly. You wrapped your legs around her waist and held on to her shoulders as she carried you towards the bed, sitting down on it with you in her lap. You buried your fingers in her hair and pulled on it as you ground your hips forward and kissed along her jaw.

In this moment, you felt something shift inside her. She tensed up, but not in a way that felt right in this situation. You let go of her immediately and leaned back to look at her, scared you had done something wrong or she didn’t want this after all.

“Abby, is everything okay?” you asked, your voice sounding strangely loud and panicky in the silent room.

She kept one hand on the small of your back while rubbing the back of her head with the other.

“Yeah, I’m sorry. It’s just - fuck…” You could see tears welling up in her eyes as she furrowed her brows and tried to keep it together. “You just reminded me of someone. It’s not your fault, you didn’t know. It’s just… you don’t know everything about me yet. Maybe it’s time you did so you can decide if you still want me.”

She averted her eyes and let her hands fall to your thighs. For the second time in minutes, you felt strangely exposed and out of place. You nodded, then you stood up and turned away. It felt like your heart was slowly tearing at the seams and pouring blood into your stomach. Why couldn’t this be easy? What was the secret Abby had kept from you? You couldn’t imagine not wanting her anymore. She was everything you had ever dreamed of, the only person that had ever made you truly happy and it was impossible for you to see a future without her. The thought alone felt like a knife to your stomach.

You quickly pulled a big hooded sweatshirt from your backpack and put it on before taking off the swimsuit and slipping into fresh underwear and linen pants. Out of the corner of your eye, you could see Abby getting dressed as well.

“I’m gonna get some wood from the back and start a fire on the beach,” you declared into the silence and rushed out the door without daring to look at Abby.

You piled up the wood on the sand, added some dried grass and small sticks in the middle and lit them with a match. The breeze had died down and the fire started at the first try. Abby came down from the cabin with two plaid blankets, a water bottle, and a small loaf of bread from your provisions. She spread one of the blankets on the ground and motioned for you to sit down, putting the second one around your shoulders when you had settled.

She sat down next to you and took a few gulps of water before handing the bottle to you. You were thankful for the cool liquid soothing your dry throat after the day in the sun and saltwater.

Abby took a deep breath, then she began.

She told you about her life at Salt Lake, growing up among the Fireflies, about her father, the surgeon, and the search for a vaccine. They had heard there was a girl who was immune and on her way to them, but only a few people believed it, her dad among them. When the day finally came, she had been out training with her boyfriend Owen and upon her arrival at the base, everyone was talking about the girl and the surgery her father was about to perform on her in order to try to develop a vaccine. There was an actual chance of salvation; everyone was enthusiastic.

Then the shooting had happened. Joel, the man who had brought the girl had suddenly changed his mind and abducted the girl straight from the operating table. He had shot everyone in his way. When Abby ran to find her father, it had been too late. Joel had killed him and with him the last chance of making a vaccine. Abby’s world had been destroyed in a matter of minutes.

That day, she had sworn vengeance. She had started training even harder than before and followed every tip she got to find Joel. The Fireflies had crumbled and she and a small group of friends had joined the WLF. Abby had broken up with Owen and everyone but her had given up on vengeance, but one day she had found Joel and his brother Tommy. She had brought them to the cabin where she was staying with her crew and she had killed Joel. An eye for an eye.

What she hadn’t expected was the young woman turning up at the last second to inevitably watch Joel die. They had left her and Tommy there and seen the matter as dealt with.

Then, suddenly, Abby’s friends had been killed one by one. This was at the same time she had met Lev and helped him flee from the Seraphites. In Seattle, she had come face to face with Ellie, the immune girl from way back and the woman who had watched Joel, her father figure, die at the hands of Abby. She had been the one to kill Abby’s crew trying to find her. Abby however had defeated her and Tommy once more and warned them not to come after her again.

Months after, just as they had made first contact with the Catalina Fireflies, Abby and Lev had been captured by the Rattlers and were tortured for weeks. One day, Ellie had turned up there and helped them escape before challenging Abby to one last fight to the death, threatening to kill Lev if Abby wouldn’t do it. They had fought a gruesome battle, both sustaining terrible wounds before Ellie had given up and let Abby and Lev go.

Abby didn’t know where she was now and if she had survived, and she didn’t care. She knew why Ellie had pursued her and she knew Ellie understood her reasons, too. Still, the loss they had suffered at the hands of the other was unbearable. Abby had lost everyone she had ever trusted or shared good memories with to horrific deaths and there would never be justice. She would never get them back and she would never understand why all this had to happen.

By the end of her story, Abby was sobbing. You had wrapped your blanket around the both of you and your hand lay on her thigh, but you didn’t dare to make closer contact. You didn’t know what to think of all this. What a waste. What a terrible, devastating tragedy. How horrible to suffer this much and have no one to blame, nothing to do with all the pain and grief.

Abby wiped her eyes with the corner of the blanket.

“I think, if I hadn’t found Lev, I wouldn’t have made it. I would have let her kill me. What was there to live for after everything that had happened?”

The thought of Abby dying was the final pull that ripped your heart to shreds. You pressed both of your hands to your chest to assure yourself you were okay, panting heavily as you tried to find something to say. There was nothing you could offer that would make this hell better for her. The realization was crushing.

You both sat in silence for a few minutes while Abby tried to calm her breathing and you tried to calm your thoughts. Finally, you broke the silence.

“I’ve loved Lev from the minute I met him and I’m so thankful he’s here.”

What you wanted to say, wanted to scream into the flames, was that you had loved Abby since the second you saw her, that she had your heart, that this was fucking confusing but didn’t change your feelings for her and that you would never give up on trying to be with her.

“That little boy has the biggest heart I’ve ever seen. He’s been through so much and he had to grow up in the span of a few months, but when I see him smile or hear him laugh or talk about fucking sustainable agriculture” - she had to laugh through a veil of tears - “I know it was all worth it. Every fight, every day in that godforsaken cell, every bullet. He’s my reason.”

Fuck it. It was better to tell her right now than to suffer the uncertainty any longer.

“Abby, I honestly don’t know what to say. I can’t even begin to perceive the horrors you’ve been through and I’m not going to act like I even remotely understand how you feel. What I do know is this: there is no one to blame in this whole terrible web of tragedy. What matters is that it’s over and that you now have the chance to live a life without constant danger and death and disaster. And I’m going to be at your side every day, no matter how long it takes for you to accept safety and peace and maybe even happiness into your life, even if it takes you forever. I have never felt the way I feel with you, I didn’t even know it was possible to love someone this deeply. I understand that you’re far away sometimes and I know there is still a lot of distance between us and you don’t have to reciprocate any of this, but I just want you to know . Know you are loved, know you have a place here, and know I will do everything in my power to help you through this.”

Abby’s eyes had gone wide at your monologue and she seemed completely blindsided by your confession. How had she not seen this coming? Did she seriously think she was just some fling to you? A little summer fun? What was she thinking?

The blonde stared into the fire, contemplating and kneading her fingers.

“Today was the first time I didn’t think of them for several hours. Ever since we arrived, I just tucked it all away in a corner of my mind and decided I could be sad tomorrow because today, with you, I would be happy.”

You held your breath and waited for her to continue, not daring to move or say a word.

“And I really was. Happy, you know? And you’re different, too. Owen was there for me so I was there for him. It just turned out I didn’t care for him as much as he did for me. And that really, really fucking sucks to know now that he’s gone. But I can’t change it. All I know is that I’ve never cared for anyone as much as I care for you. You’re constantly on my mind and I get irritated and impatient when I haven’t seen you for too long, usually meaning only a couple hours, which is a little pathetic if I gotta be honest.”

She looked at you and it felt like she was staring right into your soul. You were frozen, in disbelief at what she was telling you. She held out her hand and you took it, your fingers naturally slipping between hers and closing around her palm. How could two bodies fit each other that perfectly? Abby took a deep breath and turned her gaze to the fire again.

“I still have a long way to go with all this and the next few days are going to absolutely fucking horrible. I have no idea how I’m going to survive that. But with you by my side, I want to try. For you, for Lev, and for all the people I’ve lost. I owe it to them to make the best of the life I still have.”

She lifted your hands to her face and kissed the back of your hand.

“You, Y/N, have stirred something inside me I haven’t felt in years. It feels warm and hopeful and eager to see what the next day brings. And because I know tomorrow will bring a lot of pain, at the moment I just want to see what the next hour brings.”

You let your head fall on her shoulder and she put an arm around you. It had gone completely dark and the fire was slowly dying down, but you were warm and comfortable. The night was singing a bittersweet song for those gone too soon, the trees humming their wonderful tenor as the waves joined in with a whisper, the bats over your heads drumming their fleeting rhythm, and an owl completing the symphony with her wailing cries.

Abby started talking again and telling you stories about her time with the Fireflies while ripping off little pieces of bread for you both. One day, her and Owen had helped her dad free a zebra that had gotten caught in some wire. Her first kiss had been Nora, her closest friend and a brilliant doctor. Leah and Jordan had been the power couple at the WLF, brilliant together but also extremely annoying whenever they started wildly making out at parties or fucking in the bathroom thinking the others wouldn’t hear. Then there was Mel, part of the group but in a difficult triangle with Abby and Owen. She had been pregnant with Owen’s child when Ellie killed her. And Yara, what a wonderful young woman. Lev’s sister had stood by him and defended him when he had gotten in trouble with the Seraphites and she had done everything she could to protect him until the day she died. From that day on, Abby had taken that responsibility.

She also told you about her fear of heights and the trip through the sky with Lev, now laughing as she admitted how bizarre it all seemed looking back. It was nice to hear her laugh again and to finally really get to know her.

When the fire was nothing more than a few smoldering coals, Abby suggested going back to the cabin. You packed up your things and carried them back inside. Abby lit the lamp again while you folded the sandy blankets and put them to the side. Then you locked the door.

As you turned around, you could see Abby standing next to the bed, looking at you. Her features were only lit from the side, golden light flickering over her cheekbones and jaw. Her head was slightly cocked and her hands were restless again, searching for something to hold on to and finding only each other.

“Come here,” she said in a low voice. You felt yourself drawn to her by an invisible string, moving faster with every step until you clashed into her, hands and arms entangling, hot mouths pressed together. She let herself fall back onto the bed and pulled you down with her.

You couldn’t tell if the rushing in your ears was the sea or your own blood, but it didn’t matter. Abby’s calloused hands were exploring your back under the sweatshirt, her thigh was pressed between yours and her heavy breathing joined the harmony in your head.

You paused for a minute, staring down at the beautiful face beneath you, her eyes promising that she was all yours.

“You're so fucking beautiful,” you whispered, then you kissed her again and dragged her down with you into an ocean of pleasure.

Author’s note: After receiving amazing feedback from you guys and a demand for more, I’m currently in the process of writing a Part 3 for this! Thank you for your patience 💌 if you’d like, you can support me by buying me a coffee 💛

#abby anderson #abby anderson x reader #abby x reader #abby tlou2 #the last of us 2 #abby anderson fic #fanfiction #smut #fluff #angst

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twistnet · 4 years

Text

the last of us masterlist

✶ = smut/sexual themes. ᰔ = author fav. § = read warnings.

ELLIE WILLIAMS

✰ IMAGINES

forsaken — after being thrown onto another world with the hopes of surviving, you forsake your armor and try to live among the people of this new world you’ve come to live on. but what happens when someone you love finds out about your past? ꒰ ✶ ꒱

companion — ellie is pretty convinced that your dog doesn’t like her, and she has no clue why or how to fix it

sneaking out — somehow, you were able to coax ellie out of her room to join you on a small adventure -- not that she’s complaining one bit

one locked door — ellie sneaks off with you during the town dance for a little bit of fun ꒰ ✶ ꒱

impatient — you were supposed to meet up with your friends minutes ago, but your shower comes as a priority and ellie isn’t happy

slow dance confessions — sometimes, things just slip out when you’re so in love with the other person ꒰ ᰔ ꒱

touch that lingers — ellie’s touch is always lingering on you ; in more ways than one ꒰ ✶ ꒱

rain against the window — taking shelter from the seattle rain, confessions are made after a quick brush of death ꒰ ✶ ᰔ ꒱

glistening in the light — while a rare slight to see ellie drunk and having a good time at one of the annual dances, it was an even better sight to see her ring glistening in the light

tranquility — after months of getting into a routine, you decide to surprise ellie with a little something special as a thank you for everything she’s done ꒰ ✶ ꒱

amazement — it’s been almost six months, and ellie still can’t seem to grasp onto the idea that you even said ‘ i do ‘

coming home — just because it’s christmas morning, doesn’t mean the work around jackson stops for the holiday -- now all you’re waiting for is for ellie to come home so the two of you can spend the morning together

✰ HEADCANONS/CONCEPTS

dating would include

being the older sister of lev & yara

nsfw alphabet ꒰ ✶ ꒱

JOEL MILLER

✰ IMAGINES

surprise — it’s joel’s birthday, and for once, that man just needs to relax ꒰ part one ∗ part two ꒱ ꒰ ✶ ꒱

warmth — cold weather sets in across jackson county earlier than expected. warm jackets, a steaming cup of coffee, and joel’s warmth are the only things you really need

worthy — after a talk about worth, you and joel confess your feelings to each other ; seeing the worth in each other

ghosts — old ghosts have a way of appearing when you least expect them to

✰ HEADCANONS/CONCEPTS

dating would include

nsfw alphabet ꒰ ✶ ꒱

ABBY ANDERSON

✰ IMAGINES

touch — abby always has to be touching you in someway, regardless of where you are at or who’s around

akrasia — the overwhelming fear that develops in the pit of abby’s stomach as she looks on you in panic, causes her to lose her self control ꒰ ᰔ § ꒱

sanctuary — after making it to catalina island, you and abby finally find some alone time ꒰ ✶ ꒱

stockings — you surprise abby with a decorated living room in an old cafe, complete with her own custom stocking

✰ HEADCANONS/CONCEPTS

dating would include

TOMMY MILLER

✰ HEADCANONS/CONCEPTS

dating would include

DINA

✰ HEADCANONS/CONCEPTS

dating would include

#🌸#twistnet :: masterlists #masterlist :: the last of us

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thegeminisage · 3 years

Note

Wait hold up… would you be willing to deposit some of the tlou 2 shit talking onto the blog? Apologies if you’ve already posted about this before and I just missed it

this will inevitably show up in the tlou2 tag where i do not want it to so strangers please know i do NNNOT want to debate about it with tlou2 defenders i am simply answering an ask if you try to argue with me or engage me on my post i'm just gonna block you and delete your reply if you send me an ask that gets deleted too. don't waste your time or mine thank you <3

ok i have posts here here and here that i made as i went thru the game but to add to those (cut for length + spoilers + discussion of upsetting content - racism, violence, etc):

i think the bait and switch they were going for (that initially you side with ellie and feels what she does is justified and halfway through the game you flip and side with abby and begin to see ellie as a monster) was DOOMED to fail because of three reasons: primarily, that people love joel and ellie so much that some of them were never going to side with abby; secondly, that abby took a long time to grow on most of the audience because most of the empathy for her comes from her scenes with lev and the rest of her group is kind of flat and boring; thirdly, because based on Values different people are going to have very different reactions to ellie torturing and executing a black woman and getting lovingly comforted afterwards by her brown girlfriend in a game and i cannot stress this enough that was released on juneteenth - and i don't even think they released it on juneteenth on purpose, i think that happened to be the friday before father's day and that they weren't thinking about black people or black issues at all, which is pretty par for the course as far as these games go

i think druckmann thought people would kind of eagerly execute nora the first go round because they hated her for her part in joel's death and then later realize that was monstrous and ellie is a monster and Oh God I Executed Her Too I'm Complicit! but like because of the protests happening around that time it just comes off as...extremely tone deaf. and the game literally doesn't give you a choice, other than to turn it off and quit. to get to the end of this thing you paid $60 for you have to do it. so like ??? who's the one who's complicit here? i didn't write that game, druckmann did

I also think the game could have had ellie learn the lesson it was trying to teach maybe ten hours sooner??? like, she let abby go in the end, but the ending of her coming home to nothing would have almost been more powerful if she had killed her. like congratulations you shithead you got what you wanted how does it feel! i think maybe they didn't have ellie kill abby because they didn't want her to be completely irredeemable but the way it's written invariably huge swathes of the audience will have already found her to be a monster a third of the way thru the game or will never decide she's a monster no matter what. they could have had that same fight in seattle on day 3 but instead we have to have abby and lev kept as slaves first and then beaten and starved and literally left for the crows to eat. if the game had ended with the shocking horror of that leading to either ellie either killing abby (partially out of mercy) or saving her and letting her go i could have dealt with it - it might have been especially effective if that was your only real choice in the game - but it just would not stop and would not end. and like lol of course we're gonna include slavery in this game and release it on again juneteenth like...buddy...

i could have even dealt with like, abby meets up with lev and they attempt to rescue abby from the slavers together but they find her like that and lev begs for her life, putting abby in the position that joel was in at the beginning of the game, and putting ellie in the position that abby was, and lev in the position that ellie was. like and THEN she chooses to do it different, you know?

but instead it's 75% misery porn, it's not very well paced, and almost all of the character interactions fall flat, and the ones that DON'T we don't see nearly enough of. tlou1 was one of the best games ever written, it was perfectly paced, and even for all the bleak misery and hopelessness the setting offered there was always something to fight for and some joy in the characters being there together. tlou2 was almost completely joyless, and it just feels like druckmann got all that money and manpower to work through something* he could have done with an essay or some therapy sessions or whatever

* reportedly this game was partially inspired by druckmann's reaction to a lynching and the extremely normal justifiable and appropriate reaction he had to it, which was that he wanted to hurt the people doing the lynching. instead of being like "yeah lynching is bad fuck those guys i hope they die" he became uncomfortable with that feeling of wishing violence on someone and made tlou2 to tell us about why wishing violence on people is bad, even if they appear to be bad people. which like. ok. you took all those years to waste all that goodwill and untold manpower and money with one of the worst and most miserable development periods to tell us that? really??

anyway, it was always going to be a polarizing experience because he chose to kill joel and the audience's feelings on joel were polarized by the end of tlou1 but from what i can tell "polarizing" here means half the people who hate it hate it for one reason and half the people who hate it hate it for the other reason - and unfortunately not as many folks fall in the middle, but somehow it still won awards? god ok i'm done now i'm literally never talking about tlou on this blog again if anybody else asks i can link them to this post

#liz answers asks #anonymous #///#////#/////#tlou2 #i don't have...a tlou2 liveblogging tag #i should #but i don't. so.#anyway don't debate me on this leave me in peace

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yourwatchisbroken · 4 years

Text

okay its kind of breaking my heart to see all of the negativity surrounding the last of us part 2, a game which is also breaking my heart right now... i have a lot to argue in favour of this game

i am not trying to change people’s opinions, but i feel like there’s so much people aren’t seeing

(HEAVY SPOILERS AHEAD)

The first thing that people are upset about is of course Joel’s death. Before I start defending this, I need to say: I already knew that Joel was going to die because I saw the leaks. When I found out that this was the story we were getting, I was angry and I wanted to cancel the game. Over the next few weeks, I came to terms with the fact that this was the route the story was going to take, and I simply hoped that it would be worth it. By the time I actually played the game, I was able to accept it for what it was. It still absolutely crippled me to see it, and I cried a hell of a lot, but I wasn’t angry about it anymore. I was able to see it with a clearer mind, and realise that he died for a brilliant story. And no, it’s not a revenge story. (I explain why later on.)

There’s also the criticism of how early in the game he dies. It surprised me at how early on it was too, but when you consider that Ellie and Joel’s final few conversations are some of the very last scenes that we see, it makes sense that we didn’t get to see much of him at the beginning. Several hints were made about their relationship at the time Joel died, but at this point, the player doesn’t even know that Ellie knows about the fireflies. We have no idea what is going on between them. Even if they had waited until later in the game to kill him, they wouldn’t have been able to show him with Ellie, because an important part of the game is when the player finds out that Ellie knows about the fireflies, and then in the very last scene where the player sees that Ellie was willing to try and forgive Joel for what he did. If they had shown a bunch of Ellie and Joel early on in the game, those key moments wouldn’t have been possible.

The second criticism I’m seeing so much about is the fact that Ellie didn’t kill Abby in the end. I can understand people wanting Ellie to finally finish her revenge mission after everything, but by the end of the game, this is no longer a story about vengeance. Everything that happened in Seattle was over a year ago, and Ellie has long since abandoned her hunt for Abby. When she leaves the farm to go and find her one last time, it isn’t out of hate. She doesn’t want to go, but she’s traumatised and desperate. She can’t eat or sleep. Tommy comes along and adds guilt to the list. Joel’s death messed her up so incredibly much and this story is so much more than a revenge story. It’s a story about grief, and how much it can affect you when you lose someone you care for so very very much. In some ways, it’s a symbol of Ellie and Joel’s relationship, and how much they loved each other, despite everything. Ellie doesn’t kill Abby in the end because this isn’t a story about hate and revenge.

Naughty Dog marketed this game as a hate story, which I think was a huge mistake. There is love in this story, especially in the ending. But when you’ve been sold this dark story of vengeance, of course you’re going to want Abby to pay for killing Joel. What she did was awful, and she took pleasure in getting revenge for her father’s death, killing Joel slowly and painfully while his loved one watched. Ellie isn’t like that. She chose to let go and walk away, tired and broken and with nothing left. When she pictures Joel playing his guitar, she realises that all she wants is him. Killing Abby wouldn’t have brought Joel back. Nothing would change, except that Lev would be left with nobody. He would’ve lost a parental figure just like Abby and Ellie lost theirs, and the cycle would continue. No matter how much Abby deserved to die, it wasn’t the answer. Ellie didn’t want to enact revenge in the same way that Abby did. She scared herself with her own behaviour in Seattle. She was shaken knowing what she was capable of, unlike Abby, who seemed to enjoy torturing Joel. Ellie is more than that. She is so much more than a hateful revenge story. It frustrates me that the game was marketed that way, because it blinds people to the love that is such a powerful force in this story. Ellie loved Joel, even after learning that he stopped her from doing the one thing she was so desperate to do with her life. She still loved him so incredibly much, and that’s the message I’m taking from this story.

The negative comments are breaking my heart honestly, because I get that people are upset, but if they looked underneath the surface of hate and revenge, they would see a lot of love and a lot of grief, and then maybe they would see that this was the meaningful Joel/Ellie story we wanted. It’s not a happy game, absolutely not. But I do think it adds on everything we loved so much about the first game.

Of course there’s also a lot of criticism about having to play as Abby and sympathise with her. I agree with this to some extent, and I wish that she didn’t have such a huge section in the game. I feel neutral about her. Don’t hate her or love her. She’s alright. But in comparison to Ellie, she’s absolutely nothing. Maybe if Naughty Dog hadn’t kept her so hush hush, we would have had time to warm to her, develop a connection to her, and then her section of the game wouldn’t feel so lacking. I’m on my second playthrough now, and to be honest, I already like her more than I did the first time around. Her part already feels more meaningful, and I do think that her side of the story adds a very interesting angle that is worth exploring.

Finally, there’s the criticism about the homophobia and transphobia in the game. It’s awful stuff, it really is. Seeing Lev be treated so terribly is heartbreaking, but I think his story adds something worthwhile. I think as long as it is never implied that this behaviour is justifiable in any way, it should be allowed in a story. Of course these things aren’t nice for anyone to see, but there’s a lot of not so nice things to see in this game, and as long as they’re done well, they can really add something. When bigotry is included in media, it need to be handled very carefully, and I don’t think this game did a bad job. If the seraphites were given a chance to defend their behaviour, or made out to be anything other than an evil, oppressive cult, I would have had a problem. Seth is given a scene where he apologises and tries to justify his behaviour but it’s still very clear that he’s a huge dick, so I don’t have a problem with that either. I don’t think the developers at Naughty Dog had any bad intentions with these things, and I think these characters and their stories are important.

#if you are someone who is upset by the writing decisions in tlou2 then please read this it might make you feel better #writing this made me feel better honestly #this game is a lot but there's a lot of good to be found in it #tammy rambles #the last of us spoiler #tlou spoilers

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daniclaytons · 3 years

Note

thoughts on tlou :)

Overall, I love the two games and the potential they have for more stories. I’m wary about the TV adaptation because the first game was already good and doesn’t really need more to make it a fulfilling story.

I truly do love Ellie and getting to follow her journey as a young girl to an adult. I love how Joel finds purpose again because of this girl he never expected to love like a daughter. It’s the found family that draws me to their dynamic. And while I love Ellie as a character herself, I think that Joel as a character falls flat without Ellie. Without her, he’s more or less another edgy white man with a beard protagonist. This might be why I accepted his death so easily in Part 2. His past and the secrets he kept from Ellie caught up with him in a world where violence was a norm. And I think that a lot of the anger towards Part 2 came from people believing the series was about Joel and Ellie when really it’s always been about Ellie. Ellie’s relationship with Joel was just one piece of her life.

I don’t think Part 2 was a perfect game. It had its issues with pacing and I do think that maybe establishing Abby and Lev’s first interactions and such before going to Ellie’s story (or at least before Ellie’s Seattle levels) would have made it easier for the audience to accept Abby’s story. The narrative put too much time into making you hate Abby before showing you that she still has some goodness in her heart (similar to Joel in the first game). And I think the fandom overall had issues with Ellie going to the same extremes as Joel would go for her because they viewed it as her somehow being a “villain” in a world where honestly the only people that are morally shitty are the ones like David and the slavers. And why the fuck did we need slavers/traffickers in Part 2 anyways???

Also my unpopular opinion is that I really do like Abby. I think a lot of the hate comes from the fact that the story waited too long to make her a character you can feel for and realize she’s not that different from Ellie. I feel like Abby was able to learn from Lev and finally heal. And I never wanted to see Ellie kill Abby because they’re both people that have been through so much at a young age and grew up in a literal apocalypse.

Maybe it’s my own religious trauma shining, but I’m invested in Lev’s story. I know some other trans people had concerns with Lev’s story with the Seraphites, but his actor did have a say in things and is a cult survivor so I think it was an informed performance. But I also think that Naughty Dog should have put appropriate content warnings for the transphobia and related religious trauma for the safety of players.

If we get a Part 3, I really want it to be the last game. Honestly, I was fine with how Part 2 ended because it was hopeful for Abby, Lev, and Ellie. They have possibilities in front of them in life now that they’ve broken the cycle that linked them together. I don’t know if Ellie’s future includes Dina (because Dina was rightfully angry at Ellie), but I don’t believe that Ellie ended the game alone. I think she ended the game being able to put the past behind her, grieve, and finally look towards the future. And I think Abby and Lev were able to do the same. I would really love for Part 3 to be focused on Lev and Abby with the Fireflies while tying up the loose ends of Ellie’s ending, but that probably won’t happen. I do wish that we got more of Dina though. Writing her out of the main story when she was really Ellie’s anchor was disappointing. But I guess that it’s better than when 95% of the fandom believed that she was going to be the death that sparked Ellie’s need for revenge. And Jesse deserved so much better than he got. Actually, besides Lev, I honestly can’t think of a person of color in the series really surviving.

Maybe the show can fix the issues with how white the surviving cast is because…. yeah. Having two games where you have to kill a black woman to advance the plot? Gross that it happened twice and painted the black women as evil for just trying to survive. Oh, and then making the leader of the WLF a black man… when the notes in Ellie’s section and Abby’s story show how militarization and authoritarianism is wrong… and then he just dies. I know that Jeffrey Wright was probably wanted for the role because he’s worked with one of the game’s narrative writers on Westworld but it felt like a waste of his talent.

Also the amount of transmisogyny, antisemitism, and homophobia that existed prior to the game’s release and the first few weeks afterwards was draining. And it didn’t help at all that the writers and Troy Baker were egging on the trolls, which just made the trolls say MORE hateful shit. Oh, and fuck Naughty Dog’s crunch. And we don’t need a PS5 remake of the first game. The ps4 remaster is enough!!!!!

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finished-ink · 4 years

Text

The Last of Us Part II RANT

I’m normally a “moblie user only” person myself, but Part II took the fattest, nastiest shit on me I’ve ever had the displeasure and feeling through game, that I had to hop on my computer and type this. But before I get in to all the bad, let me start off with the little good in the game.

PROS: The Sound Design, the Animation and Graphics, and the Voice Work

Sound Design: The songs and music in this game were extremely well done. It had me moved to tears to sitting on the edge of my seat anxious about what was going to happen next.

Animation and Graphics: The animation truly seemed like a TON of time, energy, and love went into designing the characters and their surroundings.The graphics were just as awesome and truly made you feel immersed in the world of tlou.

Voice Work: Great work done my all voice actors involved. They, along with the graphics, made the characters really come to life.

OK, now done with the good, time for the fucking bullshit. I am mostly going to focus an the story and the characters. Because holy fuck, I know GOT season 8 was like a milestone in bad storytelling, but the goal wasn’t to do worse than that shitty ass season.

The Shitty Story: I think the first thing that set this story up to be the fuck up that it is, was this lesson of “Violence isn’t the answer”. I think if the lesson was, “Your actions and choices have consequences” would have been a better theme to go along with this story. So, lets begin with Joel’s death.

I was honestly not surprised at all when I got to Abby at the beginning and someone was there to kill Joel. To think he would be able to evade the effects of what he did to the Fireflies would have been a bit ridiculous. I was even semi-fine with the torture of Joel, because I could see how that decision would force the player to really want to get back at Abby. Was it needed? Absolutely not because just killing Joel would of accomplished this. But if the torture of Joel was something Naught Dog really wanted to include then OK fine. We then come to the next extremely shitty part in the story, killing members of WLF and the game making the player feel guilty for it.

Now I know this is kinda a game play issue, but the issue being solved with a simple change in the game play would effect the story. And that is allowing the players to choose what the fuck they want to do. Do you want to just going in and slaughter everybody while their friends scream about their friends dying. That’s completely your choice. Do you want to quietly and tactically knock them out and leave them to live? Let that also be a choice. The could of even done it to where the more people you kill the more ammo and weapons you could collect, but it’ll be harder to travel because WLF will be sending out more brutes and harder enemies in an attempt to stop you. On the flip side, the more people you knock out, the less ammo and weapons you have, but the less WLFs there are to try and hunt you down because you’re not a bigger threat than the Scars. Then they could use dialogue said by the npcs to give the player an idea of how much of a threat they are to WLF. In a game where its trying to teach this lesson of “Violence isn’t the answer”, it sure forces you to resort to violence at every opportunity. You can even keep the intended message because in the game, violence isn’t always truly the answer. Bouncing off of this is my next change to the story, having the players make the choice about whether or not they want to kill Nora, Mel, and Owen.

Let’s get one thing straight, Ellie beating the shit out of Nora was not needed. An alternative to getting the info about where Abby was staying at could of been done through a series of little puzzle quests to give Ellie clues on where Abby was. This would be longer, but would not of had the same effect on Ellie’s mental state as beating the fuck out of Nora did. However, they could of kept the original scene as it played out. You get the info fast and you don’t lose out on anything major. Maybe some ammo and some pills but not enough to where it feels like you’ve lost out. But the choice now falls on the players to decide what they should do. The same applies with Mel and Owen. When you arrive at the aquarium, the player can decide to shot Owen to get Mel to talk, kill Mel to get Owen to talk, or grab Mel to threaten Owen to talk. The two kill options would be semi-bad because what played out originally with Abby would happen. But if the player decided to threaten Mel, Owen would talk, Ellie would release Mel but still holding them at gun point, and leave. However this would happen after another choice I think should of been implemented in the game. The choice to travel with Jesse to go and find Tommy.

When this happened even I wanted Ellie to just go with Jesse. It seemed like a great point to give the players a chance to decide what they wanted Ellie to do. Here’s how I would of wanted it to go: The player can either make Ellie continue to the aquarium, and the story would follow along as normal, or the player makes Ellie go with Jesse to find Tommy and leave. They leave and find Tommy after his encounter with Abby. You could even make another choice here where Tommy wants to try and go back to hunt down Abby, or go back to Dina with Jesse after he argues that they need to leave. If you go back with Jesse, Tommy follows with you, upset she gets to live, but moves on. From this they return to the theater, grab Dina and travel back to Jackson. This can then branch off to the future we see with Ellie and Dina, but there’s a scene where they travel to Jackson with J.J to see Jesse and his family. While there, Tommy approaches Ellie and says that he found Abby, and the player can decide what to do here as well. Go after Abby or stay. If the player goes after Abby, Ellie does find her and kills her, but it leaves Ellie feeling a bit conflicted because she doesn’t feel the fulfillment she thought she would feel. Cut to her traveling back to Jackson, visiting Joel’s grave and cue heart wrenching scene of her playing the guitar at his grave.

Now circling back, if the player decided to travel with Tommy to hunt Abby down in Seattle, Jesse reluctantly agrees, but tells them if they don’t find her by tomorrow afternoon, they all leave. This would then lead to the player finding Abby and Lev (because in my head Lev does run off but the boat he takes in the aquarium isn’t there and heard talk about the other boats the WLF’s use and takes off there, but Abby catches him in time to stop him from traveling to the island. This would happen after her encounter with Tommy) and Abby would tell Lev to run back to the aquarium with Yara. So its Ellie, Jesse, and Tommy holding Abby at gun point. Knowing a 3v1 isn’t winnable, she lays down her weapons and thus, another decision is allowed for the player. Kill Abby or let her live. Killing Abby has an effect on Ellie’s mental state and that can effect the game at the end. Not too bad that it ruins the ending, but bad enough that maybe there’s a cut scene of her having nightmares about killing her. If the player decides to not kill her, Ellie lets her go, she runs off, Tommy and her argue and Jesse tells them to drop it and get back to the theater. They do and cue to the ending I talked about earlier with everyone going back to Jackson. Now this leads me to my leads final story issue I would change about the game, Abby’s portion would be significantly cut down.

While the player would still play as Abby, the only flash back that would be included is the one about her and her father. Narratively, I don’t hate it. It allows for the player to understand why Abby wanted to kill Joel and drive home the new theme of “Your choices and actions have consequences”. However playing as Abby for, what, 12 hours of the game wasn’t needed. If the excuse was to pad for time, everything I said above would not have only extended the time, but would of allowed for players to want to replay the game. The player would still play as Abby with Lev and Yara so it can set up the players for how all the characters got to where they are by the time the player is given the choice to Kill or Let Abby Go. I’m on the fence about if the player would still be Abby and the theater scene would play as normal if you kill Mel or Owen. Kinda up in the air but what can you do. Anyways, while this would humanize the character to extent, it wouldn’t try to wash down her deeds like Naught Dogs tried to do. In my creation of this story, what happened in Santa Barbara would not take place at all.

All in all, there was some much they could of done with this story that could of made it worth playing. I have no more words for this grotesque torture p*rn game Neil and Naught Dogs decided to create. I wish I could fucking wipe my brain and get back to two days I wasted on this game. Fuck them and I hope Naughty Dogs fucking falls apart. I will finish my little essay with asking y’all to please not harass or go after the voice actors and the people who tried to make this game. Go after Neil , because ultimately this falls on him.

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unstoppablezombie · 4 years

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The Last of Us Part II thoughts and opinions

I finished my second playthrough last night. I think I’m ready to finally share what I thought was amazing, my issues with it, and the concerns I have for the future. This post will be lengthy, I understand if you won’t read all of it, but I’m going to try my best to break it up and organize it so if there’s a part you’d want to know if you’d relate to, you can jump to that. But I think it’ll be worth the read, and if you want to discuss how your thoughts are the same or if they differ, I’m open to have a civil discussion about it. These are all 100% my opinions. I highly recommend playing the game start to finish first to form your own opinions as well. There will be spoilers. This is your warning.

What I loved:

Ellie

She deserves her own category. Since the first game I loved her character and my love for her only grew in part II. She is the probably the best and most relatable female protagonist anyone could ask for. At least for me she is. I enjoyed every second I got to play as her. Especially during the birthday flashback and barn scene with Dina and JJ.

New characters

To be honest, the only new character I truly cared for was Dina. I wish we got to have her as a companion longer and got to know more about her. From what we picked up along the way, she was perfect match for Ellie. Lev was cool (or cold as he likes to say), but I didn’t grow attached to him like others.

Representation

Although I wish we saw more of them, I think Ellie and Dina’s relationship was absolutely beautiful and heartwarming (besides the ending, which I will talk about later). I truly think this is a step in the right direction for representation in video games for any LGBTQ relationships, and I truly hope there will be a part III or DLC to showcase Ellie and Dina more positive outcome (even though Neil Druckman went on record saying there’s no plans for DLC or a Part III, but I don’t believe him)

Gameplay

The combat and animation system was S tier. The “feel” of it is smooth and weapons feel powerful. Once I got the hang of dodge and going prone, I was obsessed with staying in stealth mode (I prefer Ellie’s stealth kill animation over Abby’s). There’s also this awesome new animation where if you hurt the last enemy but they’re not dead yet, you can slowly walk up to them and do this brutal melee finisher move. Felt like a badass everytime.

I also loved how the increase in creepy/dark/eerie areas. Stalkers are a lot scarier than the first game and the rat king boss fight was like it was out of a resident evil game.

The Little Things

I fell in love with the little details: the lighting in every scene, pull an arrow out of your shoulder, safe puzzles and weapon bench animations, how Ellie/Abby looks when opening a door, flashlight, THE MUSIC! The score and music choices along the way (future days and take me on)

What I didn’t like

Abby

Not going to lie to you folks, even after 2 playthroughs, I hated every second playing as Abby. The only scenes I didn’t mind was the “afraid of heights” segment with Lev and the rat king fight. Although ND attempted to have me sympathize with her as a character, it never stuck. I will be fair, I see the humanity in her, especially when she’s with Lev and the fact Lev basically told her to save Dina and Ellie, but without Lev, I don’t care for her.

Any of the characters that had to do with Abby’s story

I don’t think it’s possible for me to care anymore less for her relationship with Owen or any of her friends. Pretty much any time that was taken away from me playing as Ellie or anything to do with Ellie’s story line, I felt it was wasting time.

We needed more heartwarming moments

We got the birthday flashback, the barn house scene, when you find out Joel tried to get into Ellie’s favorite comic book, and some other little moments in between. I truly believe the reason why a lot of us love TLOU is because of the love between Ellie and Joel, the things that made our hearts a bit warmer, and even the ending of the first game, we had something to hold in our hearts, we knew Joel and Ellie were together. In Part II, we end with Ellie walking away with her loss of everything. She lost Dina, JJ, and the ability to play guitar. Basically, everything she loved was lost. (I will circle back to this at the end).

The ending

This can go up for debate, but I think the ending was left way too much for interpretation. I think ND could’ve given some direction on where Ellie is headed. If she’s going to Jackson, going out on her own. I mean, especially since ND is being very abrasive about if there’s going to be another game or not. I think the ending was cruel, especially those of us (which I think is a lot, probably 90% of TLOU community) that holds Ellie in our hearts dearly and always will.

Post Edit: I forgot to mention that I don’t think it’s talked about enough that Ellie saved Abby. If Ellie never went back for her final attempt for revenge, Abby would’ve never made it.

My concerns for the future

Neil has gone on record multiple times there’s no plans on a DLC or a part III (he says the next best idea will be the one they go with, whether that’s a new IP or TLOU). However, the way they set up Part II, introducing new characters and the way the menu changes to Catalina island (indicating to us Abby and Lev made it). I’m afraid that IF there is a DLC or Part III, Ellie won’t be the main protagonist. Which, would 1000% break my heart if that’s the case, and honestly, I probably will not play it if Ellie isn’t apart of it.

In the recent Kinda Funny Games gamescast, Neil was oddly quiet when asked where Abby and Lev end up besides alluding that menu once completing the game is Catalina island. But when asking about where Ellie ends up, he openly says he doesn’t know and no one really has thought about it.

There are a lot of people saying they prefer Abby storyline over Ellie (I respect your opinion if you think that, but if that’s what you truly believe, I think you’re wrong and I don’t trust you) and I truly am concerned that this game is the last we will see from Ellie. That’s the last thing I want. I will feel a lot better if ND will publicly state if this was the end or not, but regardless, we deserve closure. Whether it be a better ending for Ellie or just telling the fans if there’s no hope.

I think at the very least, we should get a DLC, showing Ellie’s quest to find Dina or give her an ending that’s more justified for the fans that care about her.

Final thoughts

I think the game was beautifully crafted, it made me feel things I didn’t think was possible for a game to do. I think we can all agree that the game was gorgeous, the actors did a PHENOMENAL job (whether you love or hate their characters), and the story is one that will be talked about for a while. In the end, naughty dog made the game and it’s done. No matter how many of us share our opinions or thoughts, nothings going to change what was given to us.

There are people who are hating on the game without playing it and giving the models and actors grief and hate about the game. Which is dumb and counterproductive. Hate the character, not the model and/or actor. I plan on playing the game again to get the platinum trophy (just missing the artifacts and collectibles), after that, I plan on taking a break and clearing my head. Part II was a very heavy game. When I was done with the first clear, I had to not play it for a day or two cause I was feeling ill and anxious.

Some can say she lost everything because of vengeance and her ego for revenge, but I think a major point the game tried to point out is Ellie is at peace with her loss and she can move onto what will give her life meaning. In previous paragraph I mentioned how her and Joel love is one of the major reasons we adore TLOU, but I think even with Joel dead, I think love can still be the main incentive to keep moving forward. The words that keep coming back in my mind is what Joel says to her at the end of the first game “no matter what, you keep finding something to fight for” and I hope we will be able to experience her next motivation.

Overall, despite the issues I had, I still love the game. It’s still my favorite form of media. I still love the fact we have such a beautiful, badass, lesbian protagonist in a video game. I try to voice that to Neil and Naughty Dog whenever I can and I hope he can see the importance in keeping Ellie as a character for more iterations. I’m remaining cautiously optimistic we will see more of Ellie.

I’m sure there are other things that I forgot to include, but those are the major things that stuck out to me.

#TLOU #The Last Of Us Part II #TLOUPII Spoilers #the last of us #my thoughts and opinions

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thebiggestmenace · 9 months

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Are there any moments not in the game you’re hoping they add in the forthcoming seasons? I really hope we get more info on her chemical burn!! They barley mention it in the game. I want to know how she even came up with that

there are! again, trying not to hold my breath so as to not be disappointed if they don't include them, but yes!

I would also love to see more on the chemical burn and the tattoo!! what was the thought process? well, we can assume the thought process, but what made her go for chemicals? did cat help her design the tattoo? what was joel's reaction? would love to see more there

would also love to see what happened in the theater after abby and lev left. like, everyone was down for the count, but then they're all relatively fine in the epilogue. (fine as in they're alive, minus jesse. I miss jesse) like, was dina the one to get everyone wrangled up and then saw jesse? or was it ellie, and she did it all with a broken arm? did she move jesse or make a makeshift sled, like she did for joel in the dlc? we know it wasn't tommy, but no one was in a good condition to take care of the others, if that makes sense. so I would love to see what happened afterwards

also the aftermath of the golfing. there's so much concept art, and I can't explain it, but I do kind of want to see that? it's gonna fucking destroy us, but idk it could also help a little bit? instead of jumping to him already being buried, but I think it would be fine if they didn't include any and did it how they did in the game

cat! I want to see cat! what was she like? did joel ever pick up that they were together? I just want to see her. maybe in the slow fall of her and ellie and then them together or in the giving of the tattoo. I just want to meet her haha

also did ellie ever come out to joel? or was that final scene him saying he knew?

part of me also wants to see more of pregnant dina? like, did it get any better once they got back to jackson? or did it get worse because of the amount of loss? how quickly did she and ellie move out of jackson completely? did she do it all while pregnant, and if she did, was she that far along? or was it pretty quickly after getting back to jackson that the two of them moved out? wait. they might've because of the amount of loss. the community still would've been mourning joel, and then to add jesse? a child? (I know he wasn't a child, but also, technically, he was. especially compared to joel) and did ellie get the wrath of maria because of the state of tommy? or was she understanding and that just added to her grief? this one's long, sorry, there's just so many possibilities

I kinda also want there to be more explanation of ellie and joel's estrangement, if they keep it in. I imagine they would, so I'd love to see how it affected ellie. cause they didn't show that in the game at all

I'd also just love to see more domestic jackson living. if you're keeping the golfing, give us more happy memories. please. make up for it

I'm not sure if there's any for abby? I thought there was at least one, but I can't remember it currently. mmm maybe was she in the hospital when the shooting happened? people pointed out there was someone running around who had a pretty long braid in that final episode. was it her? there was also an extra nurse that people thought was her. so I guess just was she at the hospital or was she out when All That happened?

I'm sure there's more, but this is all I can think of currently! I might reblog this if more come to mind :) thank you for asking, anon!

#sorry this isnt even in order #i typed as they came to mind #i do believe there's one more #specifically for abby #i just cant remember it >:(#but i think just the aftermath of the theater and them getting back to jackson is a big one for me #but we didnt get the aftermath of ep8 so im not holding my breath #do want to see more of the burn and the tattoo though!#did tommy help her?#or was he also in the dark for that?#theres so many things eheh #the last of us #tlou #tlou2 spoilers #cw death #rambling menace #ouchie revelation #menace answers

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earthnashes · 4 years

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LAST OF UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!

I started playing the very second it was made available to play and just finished it last night at like 4 in the morning. And of course it destroyed me. I love this series man so much man. ;w;

SO! I don’t usually do this but I’m like, fuckin’ dyin’ to talk about it a lil bit so if ya have plans to play it, SPOILERS BELOW THE CUT. <:

-Aight so lemme just say right off the bat that this game is fucking. Gorgeous. The environments, lighting, visual design, the level design, everything was spot on. And don’t get me started on the CHARACTER MODELS. AND ANIMATION. Like bro that shit was lifelike in not just appearance, the characters emoted and carried themselves with so much life they felt legitimately real. They were all so unique too; characters had unique special ticks to just them (Like Ellie pinching her fingers when nervous or upset, or Joel standing taller and squaring himself when talking about hard subjects like he’s bracing himself for it, or Jesse giving his stunted headtilt when he talks) and expressed in a way that was just. Bruh. Aight I’mma stop but fuckin hell what they pull off with the characters in specific in LoU (both part 1 and 2) is just somethin’ outta this world.

-For anyone interested in playing it, the game is roughly 22-30 hours long if you’re just focused on the story, and much longer still if you take the time to explore and find all the little secrets. Some secrets include unique cutscenes and dialogue that are well worth the look; I haven’t found all of ‘em yet but I’m considering trying a completionist playthrough.

-Joel’s death fucking destroyed me. I’m in no way surprised he died, but it hurt regardless, just how quickly things went south for him and Tommy there. And ELLIE. FINDING HIM AND WATCHING HIM GET REKT WAS PAIN INCARNATE. Set the tone hella hard and I’m fuckin’ here for it.

-I’m not gonna lie I fully expected to dislike Abby given she rekt Joel, even though I figured it was for a pretty good reason before it was revealed her pops was the doc Joel killed. But damn. I really enjoyed Abby, a lot actually. From a gameplay standpoint I dare say I enjoyed her section more than Ellie’s since you were BLASTING ENEMIES with those fuckin’ GUNS of hers. And by guns I mean her arms’, jesus she was shredded. As a character, she felt a lot like Ellie from a different perspective and mindset, and I really appreciated the reflection the two of them had. Two sides of the same coin, basically. Also I really, really liked how killin’ Joel brought absolutely no peace to Abby at all, and you caught her beginning to regret it. And it kinda sorta acted as the catalyst to her shift in how she viewed the world. I think that’s a good portion why she latched onto Yara and Lev so hard. Perspective is everything, and there is always more than just one side of a story.

-In the same vein I had a blast learning more about Abby’s friend group, dynamics, how she lived, who she worked for and her past and everything. Of them all I think I liked Nora the most, but Mel and Manny were both reaaaalll close seconds. O:

-Speaking of, DOGS. DOGS DOGS DOGS. So many dogs man and you got to play with and pet them! Fuck yeah. That should be a rule in gaming; if you have a cat or a dog in the game, you should have a button to pet it. Also good gorl Alice is best doggy don’t fight me on this. uwu

-Jesse and Dina were the beez knees I fuckin loved them man. They were exactly the sort of folks I can see Ellie being best friends with. ALSO, this one isn’t major, but I really appreciated that there was no love-triangle here? Dina and Jesse dated, smashed, didn’t work out but they still remained good friends. Ellie’s first reaction to seeing Jesse is to confess that she and Dina kissed, and Jesse readily accepted the fact that Dina moved on (and he had too). It’s just refreshing. No bullshit love triangle there, just three people who really understood each other. Also jesus christ, I really didn’t want Jesse to die. Goddamnit. But I’m so glad they didn’t kill Dina too like, I was fully prepared to see her get fucked up. Base rule of LoU: anyone you like has a high probability of dying. ;w;

-BRO THINKING OF JESSE, ELLIE, AND DINA MADE ME REALIZE THE PARALLEL OF THEIR RELATIONSHIP TO MEL, ABBY, AND OWEN. Ellie’s triangle was essentially non-existent; no feelings of betrayal or anger, just understanding and love, like there was a deep-seated bond here that would weather anything. If Jesse had lived, I wouldn’t doubt he, Ellie, and Dina would have lived together to raise the baby together. Meanwhile Abby’s triangle had Owen seeming to unable to let go of the past he and Abby had together, that poor bastard was still in love with her, and how that supplemented the slow deterioration of all three’s friendship. I was sad to see Mel turn on Abby the way she did but like. I mean. Dude was ready to leave Mel in the dust for Abby despite HIM GETTING MEL PREGNANT. Abby also kinda did drag everyone into this, even if it was of their own violation. Oof. Though it did feel like she was angry at both Abby and Owen equally, not just blaming Abby for everything there... or at least the romantic relationship part. Honestly probably one of the few times I actually enjoyed a love triangle in a story, or at least of this caliber.

-Isaac, the leader of the WLF? He was cool as fuck. I love how much character they packed into him without even showing him too much. Like there was a scene where Nora mentions she tried to question Isaac about Owen and she said “he gave her that fucking look and told her to drop it”. Hell, when he was talking to Abby, he isn’t that much taller than her but he felt like he outright dwarfed her with the way he carried himself and how they reacted to him. I love shit like that man. But anyway fuck Isaac. uwu

-Not gonna lie I kinda wish I got to see the leader of the Seraphites, but it was hella cool to learn that she had been dead already and how the Seraphites operated with and without her. I don’t think I found everything regarding that specific point in game, but it sounded a lot like a peaceful religious leader who’s words and teachings were twisted to suit the goals of corrupt members of the tribe. She was essentially an equivalent to Jesus, at least to the Seraphites.

-I honestly really loved all of the characters introduced but I have to admit that Lev and Yara were standouts. Yara’s one hell of a big sister, lemme tell you, and the lengths she went through to make sure Lev was safe really shooketh me. AND LEV. MY CHILD. MY SON. To those of you who are familiar with the LGBT+ controversy around the game, he and Ellie are what people are complaining about. Ellie because she’s gay, Lev because he’s trans.

Lev in particular was heartbreaking. His tribe were outright hunting him for who he was, as well as Yara because she chose to protect him. The mindset the tribe had was pretty much isolated to them though.

And jesus. That scene with him and his mother? Fuck.

-YARAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA :( BRUH that scene pissed me off, fuck you Isaac, you bastard.

-THE SCENE. WHEN YOU PLAY AS ABBY. AND YOU FIGHT ELLIE. WAS SO FUCKING COOL. AND SCARY. Ellie man, that section really showed how efficient and smart she is. She legit tricked me a few times not gonna lie, like I thought she didn’t see me but she’d pretend she wouldn’t, only to ambush me with a FUCKING MOLY. Also the fact that the game outright says “hey uhhhhh you can’t actually take her head on, she’ll fuck you up in a heartbeat bro”. Welp. A really strange mix of horror and sadness and pride there. Hm. :/

-Mom!Ellie was so fucking sweet to see. And it made me catch a glimpse of hope that Ellie actively tried to soldier through for her fam’s sake. But she clearly had demons she had to confront and I’m angry at Tommy for disrupting her and Dina’s life, but it felt necessary. Still made me sick to my stomach to watch her go after Dina fucking BEGS HER TO STAY. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

-Speaking of Tommy, it was so sad to see how much he fell after Joel’s death. It really showed just how much he was like his brother though; underneath a gentle man is someone you best not trifle with, and is very familiar with doing horrific things to reach a goal. Because fuckin hell, Tommy is legit a badass. That sniper part was SO. COOL. Aaaaand terrifying. RIP Manny. :/

-Bro, I’m very curious to see more about the Rattlers but. They were fucked up in a special kind of way. There’s no telling what they did to those people they captured and enslaved. Seeing Abby in the state she was in after seeing her throughout all the game in tip-top shape was painful. That poor girl was literally skin and bones and... just beaten down.

-ELLIE AND ABBY’S FINAL FIGHT WAS SO SAD. I HATED (but I loved) EVERY SECOND OF IT. I was so scared Ellie had fully lost herself there, when she threatens an unconscious Lev to force Abby to fight, who at that point, very clearly didn’t want to. Honestly. Ellie clearly didn’t either, far as I could tell, but it felt like it was the only way she knew how to confront everything. Fight it, until you kill it, or you die. It also felt like Abby understood that since she was in Ellie’s shoes once upon a time.

-I don’t care what anyone else says I’m so happy Ellie let Abby go. I’m so glad she chose not to go through with it. For so long Ellie has been angry and resentful about a lot of things, and she never got a choice once throughout the majority of her journey. As much as I will 100% agree with Joel sayin “fuck this supposed cure, fuck the Fireflies”, it’s not fair of him, or the Fireflies, to just outright take that choice from her, that she didn’t really have one to begin with. She was justifiably angry with Joel and the moment she chooses to try and forgive him, he dies. Another choice stolen away from her. The fact that she chose mercy despite everything, and it was prompted by a memory of Joel, the very reason she was doing this, is profound to me. Like she finally understood why he did what he did, and why he said he’d absolutely do it all over again. Hell, she probably even reached the understanding that her and Abby really aren’t that different from one another in that aspect.

-Ellie returning to an empty home, with Dina and JJ gone, was heartwrenching. I fully understand why Dina left and she honestly had every right to, but it still hurt man. :C AND ELLIE. PLAYING THE SONG JOEL MADE/SUNG FOR HER. ALWAYS KILLED ME. But this instance in particular was something else man like fuck I balled like a baby. Especially when it was followed by the fact that Ellie and Joel were on the cusp of mending their broken relationship only for it to be ripped away man. Goddamnit.

-ELLIE AND JOEL DUET NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. FUCKIN HELL I love this game.

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So, this isn’t really a review more than it is me just sharing some of my thoughts on the game, but if ya want me to give it a rating? 10/10. If not a perfect score? At least a 9/10.

The Last Of Us as a series is one that’s moved me more than any other game I can think of honestly (outside of Telltale’s The Walking Dead), and just like the first one, LoU2 left me thinking about it for hours after. It’s thought-provoking, it’s compelling, it’s fun as fuck, aaaaand it’s made me cry like a baby a good number of times. I also really appreciate the fact that, in this game, they actually show the consequences of your actions. Like, they made you consider the fact that you aren’t just killing grunts to get to the next enemy or mowing through mindless drones. You’re killing people, who have lives, and friends, and families.

We got to see Joel for who he was: a very broken man, with a very dark past, who has done very horrible things in this shitty post apocalyptic world, but he is a father, and protective, and loving and thoughtful, who will do anything, anything, to protect Ellie. Blood or not, Ellie is through and through his child. But Abby only saw a monster, and could you blame her? He killed her father, and countless others, and she never got the full story. Just that a man came in and killed the entire hospital, put an end to even the smallest possibility of finding a cure, killed her dad in cold blood, and walked away no problem. And then it cycles right back to Ellie, where Abby becomes her monster.

It’s just some grade-A storytelling as far as I’m concerned, and I’m someone who usually prefers happy endings. LoU always leaves me feeling bittersweet but goddamn do I love this series. I’m kinda hoping for a DLC, to be honest? Like LoU part one, where you found out about Ellie and Riley. I wanna see what happens to Ellie; I get the distinct feeling she returns to Jackson and hopefully scrounges out some semblance of a decent life there, after confronting Tommy and (hopefully) making peace with Dina. But we’ll see! uwu

#earthsong talks

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kaptainandy · 4 years

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My Complete In-depth TLOU 2 Thoughts:

Yeah I know, y’all have already read through countless reviews and thoughts, but I gotta get my thoughts out there. So, continue under the cut for some somewhat coherent, essay-ish style ramblings. There will be a TL;DR at the end because this is going to be long. (Spoilers ahead).

Okay so my overall perception of this game is that it’s average and I’m slightly disappointed. I’m going to start with the things I really liked and enjoyed before I get into what I didn’t like.

The visuals and gameplay were solid and enjoyable with small improvements upon the first game’s already fun and interesting, gameplay. The NPCs felt less like they were following a track in terms of their movements and felt more natural. The dialogue between enemies felt more varied than the first game, and the addition of giving everyone a name made me feel more immersed and the reaction from other characters to their fallen friends felt more believable. I feel that overall, the development of gameplay from the first to the second game felt “if it ain’t broke don’t fix it,” and I think it worked out because it’s one of the aspects I liked about the first game. The addition of craftable silencers, varied stealth takedowns, ability to go prone, tall grass to hide in, cars to hide under, larger infected (bloaters and shamblers) now being able to destroy weak walls, etc. were fun editions that helped the combat feel less repetitive. And lastly, the areas of combat that included both human enemies and infected, (and later WLF soldiers vs Seraphite soldiers) was really cool and felt more realistic for the world of the Last of Us. It was something I think the first game lacked and it was really interesting to choose who to take down first and let the enemies fight each other.

The level design was also great. I felt it gave the player a lot of options of how they wanted to traverse the area to takedown enemies and look for supplies. Everything felt huge and worth exploring. The player was rewarded appropriately for checking every nook and cranny, and the addition of going prone to fit under small spaces or breaking glass to get into locked buildings was a lot of fun. The first day in Seattle as Ellie was especially enjoyable as you got to explore the city and mark things on your map while engaging in dialogue with Dina. Every building held something new and acted as an opportunity for Dina and Ellie to banter.

The art direction was incredible and I don’t think I’ve seen a more stunning looking game. It felt like a lot of time and care went into the design of each item and every corner of every environment. My favorite environments were definitely the homesteads of the major characters/factions (Jackson, the stadium transformed into a village by the WLF, the Seraphite island, etc.) because it told the player more about what everyday life is like for these characters and how they’re similar and different. Also, the weather, time of day, lighting, and use of space (or lack there of) added tension and changed the tone in scenes and levels appropriately. I felt engaged in each moment. I think the best use of visuals and atmosphere to set tone and really immerse the player was in the lower level of the hospital during the Abby playthrough. It was claustrophobic, damp, dark, ominous, and it always felt like danger and despair were right around the corner. And the massive clicker cluster fight in the small hospital corner was one of my favorite parts in the entire game. What would have felt like a silly and dumb concept if encountered elsewhere, was actually legitimately terrifying and really cool due to the tone set from the scene. Seeing the effects of a ground zero site for infection 25 years later was really cool to see.

The music? A masterpiece. We have to stan Gustavo Santaolalla. What more can I say? He did a great job. If nothing else, give the soundtrack a listen.

The acting was incredible, as to be expected. The emotional moments were really sold and carried by the actors and the music together. Ashley Johnson, Troy Baker, Shannon Woodward, and Laura Bailey I expected to be phenomenal and they were, but I’d like to give a shoutout to the newcomers and more minor actors as well. I felt no one had a bad performance, or even an average one. Every performance felt genuine and made me more connected to the characters.

As for new characters, I felt Yara and Lev were the ones I felt the most for and were the best written. The inclusion of Lev being trans was really cool to see as a trans person, and I felt it was executed well within the story. Lev being exiled from the Seraphites for questioning their ways and attempting to transition while Yara fought to remain by his side and protect him, made them both interesting and likable characters. They had depth to their characters. Despite coming from an environment that seemed ruthless and unforgiving they both acted as voice of reasons and wanted to help others, which was their strength and their weakness in the end, adding to their complexity.

The story had it’s moments. I found myself being impacted more during light and happy moments more so than the traumatic and sad ones. I felt a lot of time was put into showing the love and care between Ellie and Dina, and I found myself smiling like a goober when they were being goofy or together or cuddling. This also ties into the LGBTQ representation, which I personally thought was well done as I briefly touched on with Lev. I understand and respect those who felt there was too much trauma forced upon the LGBTQ characters, and I agree with that when it comes to Ellie because the whole game was essentially torturing her. I’ll at least give Naughty Dog credit for avoiding the “bury your gays” trope when they very easily could’ve done that given the constant death in the world of the Last of Us. Treatment aside, as a gay trans man, the overall presentation of these characters I felt was realistic, respectful, and gave me hope for future LGBTQ representation in triple A titles. I know this is literally doing the bare minimum but we gotta start somewhere.

Now, as for things I disliked about the game, there was a lot and I felt the weight of things I disliked outweighed those that I like since the overall experience depended on them more heavily.

I’ll start with the small things that irked me, that could be somewhat excused and are more a personal preference. For starters, I felt the game was too long. After awhile it got repetitive and having nearly the entire game take place in one city (as opposed to the first game that took place across the country), the scenery got old pretty quickly. I feel like a lot of the traveling could have been cut. For example, instead of showing a cut scene where characters say “we have to get to x” and having to basically travel the entire way, it would’ve worked better had it cut to them being at or close to their destination, thus cutting back on repetitive combat. It didn’t feel super rewarding and it only sometimes resulted in something added to the story. In the end, I felt it should be exempt for a similar reason you don’t need to show a character’s entire traveling in a movie, it’s just unnecessary.

Another minor detail that bothered me was the shamblers. Not as a concept, because I thought they were really fun new enemies and added something to combat, but the fact that they felt thrown in with no explanation. Where did they come from? Are they only in the northeast of the US? What caused them? It’s mentioned briefly by one character (I forget who) that it could be a result of excessive rain, but it was just a guess and not further elaborated on.

The fact that events and characters of the first game that were influential to Ellie and Joel’s character seemed to be inappropriately forgotten about. I understand the game is meant to be enjoyed by people who haven’t played the first game as well as fans of the first one, but it could still be done in a way to cater to both audiences. It would also help people who didn’t play the first one learn and connect more to Ellie and Joel. Why was there no Riley-related dialogue for Ellie upon seeing “The Turning” arcade machine? Hell, Riley was never mentioned at all. Same with Tess. Bill was briefly mentioned, but not by name. Ellie’s mom still remained a mystery, and I don’t recall her being mentioned. Henry and Sam? Also never mentioned. Upon seeing Sam’s robot toy in Ellie’s room (which I thought was a nice touch) I would’ve thought he might’ve been brought up in discussion with Dina about past friends. I get that it could be implied Ellie has discussed her past with Dina and others before the events of the game took place, but you have an audience to think about. Essentially you have to think that if the audience didn’t see it or hear about it, it didn’t happen. I feel the omission of past characters and events was a disservice to the first game and was really disappointing.

This relates to something else I disliked: It felt like too much time was spent on characters solo traveling and being in combat and not enough on story and relationship building. I felt the time spent traveling alone as Ellie or Abby was far greater than traveling with a companion. The dialogue and interactions between Ellie and Joel in the first game was crucial to the story and relationship, and when the characters were apart, it made the player that more eager for them to be reunited. They were only ever apart when one was missing/injured or they were unintentionally separated and it made sense to the story. In terms of missed opportunity, I especially thought Jesse’s character was mishandled and wasted. Just as the player was really beginning to know his past and connect with him, he dies a seemingly (in my opinion) stupid death. Not only that, but there’s almost no mention of him or his death after it happens, and Ellie and Dina seem relatively unaffected. I felt like Dina’s character also could’ve been fleshed out better. She was one of my favorite characters, but the things we knew about her didn’t seem to impact the story or her character that much, especially the loss she’s suffered. Her thoughts about her sister’s death and Jesse’s death are barely touched on, and I just felt like I was left wanting more.

Jesse and Dina could’ve definitely been handled better, but at least I cared about them. I didn’t have those feelings towards anyone in Abby’s story (except Yara and Lev). This relates to the bigger problem with the timeline of events and the and the order they were shown in the game, but I’ll touch on this in a bit. Before beginning to know these characters, the only thing you know is that they were involved in killing Joel, and happy about doing so. Now the challenge was to get the player to like them, which the writers failed abysmally. I couldn’t even remember half of their names when they were brought back up. The most influential of Abby’s friends, aside from Owen, seems to be Manny and the only things we get to know about him is that he’s horny, likes to get drunk, and - much like the writers - tries to force other characters to like each other (i.e. Mel and Abby). He only exists to establish Mel and Abby’s relationship and to save and help Abby when they encounter Tommy trying to snipe them. Mel and Abby (who I will touch on extensively in her own paragraph because yikes) both seemed like miserable people to be around and their relationship seemed catty and to simply revolve around Owen. I’m kinda sick of having women characters’ relationships revolve around the fact that one of them used to date the guy that the other is now currently dating. It’s stupid and I couldn’t give less of a fuck if that’s the biggest roadblock in their relationship. Also Mel calling Abby a piece of shit seemed unwarranted based on what we knew. Like we knew Mel was against the brutality of Joel’s death, but the way she spoke to and of Abby seemed like there was something else that the writers forgot to tell/show the audience. Abby never did anything personal to Mel (that Mel knew of) yet Mel decides to hate her guts and be unreasonable? Nora was kind of okay and seemed like an actual decent person (aside from wanting Joel dead and them making that shitty comment to Ellie) in her relationship with Abby. She was willing to risk getting in trouble to help Abby, but we weren’t given enough time with her to make me give a shit, especially after what she said to Ellie. Owen had potential to be likable; he was charming, funny, a bit of a fuckboy, but nonetheless was optimistic and hopeful. But for some reason the writers decided to throw out any ounce of care we had for him by having him cheat on Mel with Abby in a shitty sex scene.

Now for my thoughts on Abby. My thoughts about her also relate to my thoughts on the order of events, and a few other aspects I haven’t mentioned yet, so forgive me if my thoughts are a bit all over the place. I really really tried to sympathize and like Abby, but holy shit they fucked up every possible opportunity to create some sort of likability. For starters, it boggles my mind that they had her commit the atrocity that was Joel’s death as basically the introduction to her character. Not only that, but just mere minutes beforehand Joel had saved her life and shown her nothing but kindness and she goes on to torture him and continue to do so while his surrogate daughter begs and screams for her to stop. She shows no guilt both in the moment or afterwards. It doesn’t eat her up inside at all. Every time Joel is brought up by Abby and her friends, she wastes no time expressing how elated she is that she not only killed him, but did so in such a gruesome way. You really expect fans to even WANT to like this character after she tortures and kills the only other character (besides Ellie) that fans LOVED. And I’m not upset that Joel died, because I expected he would and there were a million ways it could’ve been done appropriately to both the story and fans. But the way he died and how early he died at the hands of essentially some nobody really rubbed me the wrong way, they essentially threw him away without any honor to the experience we had with him in the first game. So, that’s our introduction to Abby and her friends. Again, the writers had the challenge of trying to make us like her, but it felt like they didn’t even try. Every attempt to make her likable fell flat either due to an action that happened right before or after. Abby’s only expression of sorrow is after the death of her father and Owen. Manny’s death is never mentioned after it happens and she seems to act like it never really happened. There is no remorse when she kills Jesse and Tommy, or anyone for that matter. She and (seemingly most of the WLF) condone and even get off on torturing Seraphites (they’re terrible people but if you’re trying to make me like a character, I don’t think you should have them condone the torturing of anyone). Abby is quick to kill Dina even after learning she’s pregnant, to which she comments, “good” and only stops because Lev is an actual decent human being and gets her to stop. And the writers have the gall to try and compare her to Ellie; trying to be like, “see she and Ellie aren’t so different uwu.” Meanwhile, Ellie is crying each time she hits Nora; she just wants Abby, she didn’t want to have to torture Nora like that. Ellie is traumatized after finding out that Mel is pregnant after killing her. Ellie is constantly shown to be grappling with the consequences and feelings of her actions. She experiences guilt and shame while Abby is shown time and time again to not regret her wrongdoings. The writers really tried to push us to like Abby by having her care for Yara and Lev, but I felt she did it out of selfishness and needing to feel good about herself not because she truly cared for these kids.

Going back to Joel’s death, the gruesomeness wasn’t even warranted based on Abby’s reasoning. Abby’s dad didn’t get murdered in front of her and he was killed because he stood in Joel’s way, holding a scalpel to Ellie. Jerry’s death was quick and painless too. And I know people will be like, “but Abby was also mad because now there’s no cure because of what Joel did!!!” However, she had no problem wanting to kill, or leave Ellie alone despite knowing she was immune. Abby was never on a quest to capture Ellie or talk her into finding the Fireflies with her (which would have made for an interesting storyline actually), she wanted her dead too. Joel’s death was the most tasteless death of a beloved character I think I’ve ever experienced.

Also the order of events was really detrimental to the story and especially Abby’s character. The way that flashbacks were thrown in throughout the story after Joel’s death fell flat and made Joel’s death feel even worse. The Joel and Ellie flashbacks were honestly the highlight of the game because we got to spend time with the only 2 fleshed out and likable characters. Had they been placed at the beginning of the game and also showed more of their relationship after Joel tells Ellie the truth about the Fireflies, I would’ve felt his death would have been more okay (still shitty, but slightly better than what they gave us) because it would feel more unexpected and it would hit better emotionally after these moments we had with Ellie and Joel. Hell, the majority of the game should have been as it was advertised (which is another issue I’m gonna touch on shortly): the rocky relationship between Joel and Ellie after Ellie learns the truth and the two of them going on a revenge quest together, as Joel tried to earn Ellie’s forgiveness. The events presented in the order in the game also made it impossible for anyone to try to like Abby. We learn she commits the biggest atrocity and we know all her friends are going to end up dead, so there’s no emotional impact when we see how they die because we’ve known the whole time they were gonna be killed by Ellie. Both Abby’s character and the story they were trying to tell could’ve have been really great and interesting but it was just so poorly executed.

The story itself seemed so amateur as well. It just boiled down to “revenge and violence are bad uwu” while giving the player no choice but to engage in said violence. They tried to create a gray area between good and evil like they did in the first game, especially with Abby’s story but they ended up doing the opposite. Also the weak use of animals and pregnancy to create emotional impact is just so easy. They couldn’t think of any other way to make us connect to the characters except “hey look they love this animal” or “this is someone who is going to have a baby under these rough circumstances” and it’s just sloppy writing especially because they use both tactics MORE THAN ONCE.

The intersecting stories, themes of “what really is good/evil,” redemption of a thought to be unlikable character, and the death of a beloved character would have been so interesting and emotionally impactful if done right, but it felt like Naughty Dog chose every terrible option and outcome, resulting in the wet fart that we got. It felt sloppy with no honoring of the previous game or characters. We all cared, but apparently the writer’s didn’t. The ending with Ellie essentially being left with what she feared most, being alone, would’ve been way more appropriate had anything prior warranted this consequence. Not only is she alone, but Ellie loses the ability to play guitar, a way in which she remembered and felt connected to Joel. Like she goes through hell, and 99% of her actions are justified, yet she gets punished.

Lastly, I want to touch on the false advertising for the game. Normally, I wouldn’t be upset because movie trailers do it all the time where there will be subtle differences or added scenes that don’t occur in the movie, but this was a whole other level of fuckery. I get trying to mislead people to think something is going to happen only to steer them in a different direction, in fact I think this is really cool and fun when done well. However, this was straight up lying and essentially selling an entirely different game. Not only were these lies perpetuated in trailers and ads, but even in events such as E3. Neil Druckmann constantly harped on the idea that the game was going to be about Ellie and Joel having a falling out after Ellie learns the truth and how they navigate their relationship through their next adventure together. Yet the game was never about that, instead it was just a story about drawing shitty parallels between a beloved character and a new character who was destined to be unlikable from the start.

In the end, I think it’s still worth playing because I’ve seen so many mixed reviews floating around so I feel it’s best to make your own opinion. And if nothing else, it’s a fun experience if you’re just looking at a fun game to play if you don’t really care too much about the series or characters as a whole. Will I return to this game? Not anytime soon likely. But just being the fan that I am of the series I think I’ll try to get most of the achievements eventually, and to experiment with photomode because the visuals are so good. Even with how much of a disservice this game is to the series, I don’t think it ruins it for me. It just makes me love and appreciate the first game even more and I think they could bounce back from this, but they’d need to put in a shit ton of work to earn their core audience back.

TL;DR: As an addition to the Last of Us as a series, the game is a huge disappointment and disservice, but as a standalone game it’s slightly above average. The gameplay, music, and visuals slap but the story, characters, and relationship building (or lack thereof) suck. Naughty Dog lied in a highly scummy way to fans via advertisements and trailers. Fuck Abby. Stan Lev and Yara.

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mechecolomar-archive · 4 years

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i replayed tlou a bit ago so im gonna share my thoughts about this 7 year old game :) it’ll be mostly criticisms (bc i clearly like the game and havent really said what i dont like about it) and what i hope nd will improve for tlou2. i’ll kinda reference footage thats already been released for tlou2, but i wont mention any spoilers

so my biggest complaint is the gameplay, controls, and maybe the layout of the weapons.

A big thing during fights that doesnt feel as good as it should be is the movement. I really dont like the forced jog throughout the entire game. I understand it when joel is hurt or the game wants to to focus on a certain thing in the environment, but other-wise it makes it really hard to explore the map naturally. Another thing when youre actively in a fight with numerous enemies surrounding u, theres almost no way to get out of it unless you shoot the enemy, theres no dodge and the L1 to sprint out of combat usually doesnt work well. This was especially frustrating with ellie who normally dies from one hit. In TLOU2 theyre adding the ability to dodge so thats something im looking forward to and hopefully crouching as a way to dodge works better bc in tlou it felt very slow and was normally used for slow stealth in tlou.

The ai of npcs often broke the immersion by outright running in front of enemies all the time, no matter what character it was. Nd didnt punish the player by having other enemies detect them, which im thankful for, but hopefully joel, jessie, dina, and lev are a bit better in TLOU2. Before Ellie became able to help me fight she often got outright stuck in the middle of me and an enemy. Ellie was unable to be harmed, but it led to these almost comical scenes where me and some hunter were just swinging pipes at each other but entirely missing due to ellie running in place between us and taking no damage from either of us.

The collectibles were very frustrating (due to the mobility i mentioned earlier) and the map at some points were annoying to deal with. A lot of nd’s games seem to put the hidden items in areas behind where you start, or places that are hard to get to and its really annoying when you have to jog to backtrack or even walk at some times. The underwater parts were also irritating bc of joel’s movement too. The map was usually ok, but the part where you can ride a horse was the start of naughty dog trying open world levels (for some reason??) and the first time was really annoying, especially due to ellie not having the horse follow you while you walk and you having to jog back to her. I honestly can’t see this being too much better based on what we’ve been shown. Ellie will ride a horse for at least 2 times, be in a boat, and potentially be in a car. ND also boasted that tlou2 will feature their largest area yet filled with things and thats not very comforting to me. The only thing i could see them doing to make it better is like at least having your horse follow you or letting you full on sprint, but i feel like they gave you the horse so you can traverse the area without running :/. I think nadine does follow chloe eventually in the western ghats part of tll, so it could be better in tlou2 but we’ll see.

The bricks and bottles really felt useless unless it was for a distraction. I also didnt like how they were considered as two separate items so it constantly looked like you could hold more, when it was just the opposite. I dont think you could run and throw bottles/bricks either in tlou, but i know that changes in 2. Hopefully whatever items u can throw are considered one item and it could be more than bottles/bricks.

sometimes interactions were in an area that were around enemies, so they would get ruined and i personally didnt like that. i felt like areas where you choose to sit and have a convo should be a clear indication the player is safe, this usually was the case but i had a moment ruined because some enemy heard me. you could argue that could be more natural, but i think having a clear establishment or whats going to happen where makes more sense.

I also had an issue with the detection by enemies in the game. I played on easy so its definitely the most lenient it could have been, but the detection sound seemed too short imo. I really wish the game had like a little meter like in most games? Also the detection sound seemed to blend into certain soundtracks played and was sometimes hard to discern between the two. I personally dont understand why they dont have a detection meter considering theres other hud elements on the screen but idk. Tlou2 doesnt seem to have included that and its kinda disappointing imo

The subtitles sometimes didnt show or they were different from what was actually said but this happened rarely and it wasnt that frustrating, it was just something i noticed. This goes along with the ruined interactions. Also the few times the game had a recorder instead of notes for collectibles, it would have been nice if there was a transcript of it. I’m just lazy, not deaf, but i know some people prefer text over sound.

I personally didnt like the controls on ps4, having to constantly hold L1 to move faster than a walk was annoying to me. I also wish there were more control layouts than the one provided, or that you could change it yourself. I wish just toggling/holding L3 would let you move faster, reloading could be square, R3 should be crouching, and circle should be dodging or whatever.

I also didnt like the photomode but apparently all new ps4 games had that type of photomode? Idk if its nd that likes that version, but it’d be neat if tlou2 had one similar to hzd/gow/hellblade. I think the lost legacy had the same type so it might just be the same :/

This is nitpicking, and isnt quit dealing with the base game, but i wish the unlockable skins were a bit more diverse instead of being 5 diff colored plaid shirts for joel and references to nd or their old games for ellie. The goggles seem to be the only unique item and its still a easter egg. Idk, i just think it’d be a bit cooler if they were more unique? I dont know if the outfits would work like in uncharted 4, with skins extending to other characters like dina or abby, but it’d be cool if they were more diverse.

Its late and this is all the criticism i can think of and hopefully they improve in tlou2, but yeah everything else is good.

#personal #long post #in case ur on mobile #tlou2 spoilers #if u dont want to hear any mention of it (game mechanics) i mean. not any actual spoilers #...maybe a name fhjsdjfsd #thats it!!

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entergamingxp · 4 years

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A spoiler-heavy interview with The Last of Us Part 2 director Neil Druckmann • Eurogamer.net

SPOILER WARNING: THIS ARTICLE DISCUSSES THE FULL STORYLINE OF THE LAST OF US PART 2, INCLUDING ITS ENDING.

Before The Last of Us Part 2 was released – but after we had finished playing it, and after its plot had leaked online – we had a chance to interview the game’s director Neil Druckmann. It was too good an opportunity to discuss the game’s full storyline and radical structure with its creative lead to miss. So here is the second, spoiler-heavy part of our chat – and please, only read on if you have already finished the game.

When you get to the second half of the game, it’s so sad that you’re meeting these people (and these dogs) that you’ve already killed. And it’s like… I was feeling shame. And I was feeling guilt. I’m not used to feeling those things in games. That’s an uncomfortable feeling.

You mentioned shame and guilt. Those are things that are uniquely videogame-y, right? It’s like, I just committed those acts. I am complicit in those acts. And now I get to see the consequences of those acts by empathising with these other people. You know, in marketing the game we talk about it one way, but really the game is about something different. We say it’s a game about hate, but that’s not true. It’s a game about empathy. It’s a game about forgiveness.

The whole thing was constructed in such a way as to say, in the beginning of the game, we’re going to make you feel such intense hate that you can’t wait to find these people and make them pay. And that’s the stuff you’re seeing online… You’ll have seen some of the leaks. The way that they’ve dehumanised Abby and the way that they’re talking about Abby, it’s kind of horrifying. And yet it’s completely human. It’s what we do.

We’ve seen this time and time again. We watch interviews of parents that have lost their child or someone they love to violence. They say, if I could get my hands on the person responsible, I will skin them alive. And I believe them, I believe that under the right circumstances, normal human beings are capable of that. So the exploration with this game is, like, how can we start with that state and then make you reflect on it? And then maybe, maybe… if something happens in the world outside of the game, there’s some of that is left over so you at least pause and say, OK, what is it like to be in this other perspective?

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The final fight between Ellie and Abby is so desperate and so hollow that there’s really no victory there either. I was just so angry at Ellie. I was so ready to hate Abby in the beginning, and my perspective on both of them completely shifted. Was the intent of that fight to have you without a doubt that Ellie is the villain?

For me, hero and villain is too much of a judgement for the way we approached it. It’s to say: here are a bunch of flawed characters that make flawed choices and have to deal with those choices, and say, can you come back from that?

Ellie’s story is the quest of trying to fill this hole that was left when Joel died, and thinking with each death, maybe if I can make it feel more like what they did to him… so each death gets more and more brutal and takes away more and more of her humanity. She’s hoping to fill that hole. It’s this empty pursuit – and again, this is based on real interviews we watched with someone that, let’s say, has a person that did their family wrong and then that person is executed, capital punishment, and the interviewee after is like, it didn’t solve anything. The person didn’t come back.

And then the Abby journey is one of redemption. She’s dedicated the past five years to finding and killing Joel. She’s made herself into this weapon. She’s imagining he’s this larger-than-life person, he’s like the devil in her mind, and you see that; this group is terrified of this man even after they shoot his leg off. They’re terrified of him. They’re shaking. And then it’s this kind of pathetic thing, the way he dies. It’s not satisfying in any way, it’s just sad. So then it’s exploring what her redemption is after that. Her redemption is saving these kids from a group that she’s been locked in war with and she’s killed who knows how many dozens of. And that’s where she finds purpose. That’s a positive thing.

To get to your point, with that fight, our hope – and I know there’s gonna be people that feel different ways – our hope was, you’re rooting for both characters. Ellie gets to the same point, almost like where Abby was, where she has certain expectations of what this fight is going to be, and it’s way more pathetic than that. Abby is not the person that is the person that killed Joel. It’s a person that has suffered and has found redemption. And you as a player have the full context for both characters, and you understand how futile this fight is.

Where did the idea for using the Pearl Jam song Future Days come from? It’s such a leftfield song, but it works really well.

It’s actually kind of a weird story. When we finished the first game, Geoff Keighley reached out to us – he wanted to do The Last of Us: One Night Live, where we would bring the actors on stage and they would act out scenes from the game. Now I thought, yeah, that’s kind of interesting, but maybe there’s a way to take advantage of it and just write something unique for the stage. I’m gonna have Troy and Ashley there – what if we could explore a scene after the events of the first game? I wrote this scene where Joel brings this guitar to Ellie. There’s this tension between them and there’s a song… And I am obsessed with Pearl Jam at the time and just in love with the song, and I check the timeline…

It literally comes out the month of the outbreak!

It actually hadn’t come out before the outbreak. But there were live performances on YouTube of Eddie Vedder performing the song, so it’s possible that Joel could have learned it. But once we had made that scene and put it out there, I felt – that’s the opening of the game. I know that’s the opening of The Last of Us 2.

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Lev is a wonderful character. He’s one of the few, you could say, innocent characters in the whole thing. And the simplicity with which he explains his situation – “I shaved my head” – is really poignant. Did you consult with trans people or LGBTQ+ groups over how his story is handled, via Yara and the cult?

[Editor’s note: some trans commentators – but not all – take issue with Lev’s representation. VG247 has an excellent article by Stacey Henley on the subject.]

Yes. We hired a religious consultant – like, OK, we’re gonna make a religion here. Let’s at least make sure we know the minefield we’re entering and what the things that might offend people are. Look, our thing was, you can’t make a piece of art that’s this challenging that’s not going to offend someone, but let’s at least be thoughtful and mindful, so we know we’re not accidentally making narrative choices – narrative choices are there in service of the story.

We have actually quite a few transgender people on the team that we were constantly talking with, we read a lot of books, we watched interviews, we brought a consultant in to walk us through a lot of that stuff. And then, once we had filled our mind with that stuff, it’s like OK, now we have to forget all that and just treat it like a character, like another person in the world.

It’s not diversity for the sake of it – like, OK, let’s have a trans character just so we can like check that off the box – no, that actually became a really interesting thing to explore within a religion. Here’s someone that is hunted by people that are following this religion, and he’s still religious, spiritual, he just interprets the material differently. That’s what diversity gets us, a fresh perspective. It’s a new way to look at a story.

What was your main hope for the character of Abby when you started out?

It’s kind of what I described: I wanted people to hate her immensely. Where they think they want to do horrible things to her.

When I was pretty young, around Ellie’s age, I was watching the news and I saw a lynching that was caught on camera. And it affected me at such a deep level – the violence, and there was, like, cheering within it. It really disgusted me. And in my mind, I was like, I would want to kill all these people. If I could just push a button, I would do it. If I could be in a room with one of these people that did some of the more horrific stuff, if they were tied to a chair, I think I could torture them. That’s where my mind went.

And then, years later, you reflect on that and you’re like, that’s really messed up. You know, I’ve lived a normal life, I’ve only been in a handful of fights in school, nothing major, and… how easily my mind was able to tip into that kind of state, just by watching something. And then trying to imagine, damn, what would happen if that was someone close to me. Those are strangers. I don’t even know any of those people. I don’t know the victims. I don’t know the people that perpetrated that.

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It became this interesting philosophical debate in my head that I’ve had for many years. Then I said, OK, in a game, we could probably make you feel those same feelings – and we know we have a character as beloved as Joel that people see almost as a family member, going by the reaction to the leak. We can get you to feel those feelings.

The challenge is what we said all along: if people don’t ever understand Abby, the whole game fails. It doesn’t work. If, all the way through, you just want nothing but revenge and never empathise with her, the game falls apart. And that’s where most of the effort for the game went, to make Abby… not necessarily good. The pitfall a lot of writers with this kind of story fall into is like, OK, we need people to like Abby, let’s make her perfect. She does nothing wrong. She only makes moral choices. But no, that’s not where empathy comes from. Actually, empathy comes from making mistakes and challenging and trying to correct your mistakes and overshooting and messing up. I guess our hope is that people see her as a human, as a complex human.

In the game, you want to really hurt people, but then you’re faced with the reality of it. And you feel, this is a lot harder than I thought it would be – because it should be hard, right?

I don’t know if you’ve seen Saving Private Ryan, but that movie left such an impact on me. Because, one, it’s really an entertaining film. You want to watch it all the way through, you want to follow those characters. And yet it’s disturbing and uncomfortable and challenging, and messes with what you thought about action stories. It makes them more grounded. And you see the horror of it all. And that’s our hope – not to just gross out people and make them want to turn the game off. Hopefully the story’s compelling and pushes you forward, but you feel the weight of your actions in a way that’s different from other action games.

The challenge with doing something new, at least new for us… is you don’t know what the reception’s going to be. And you’re seeing some of it now with the reaction to the leaks. I think games have trained us to have a certain expectation from sequels. It’s like, I expect to play certain characters, I expect for things to play out a certain way. And we wanted to really challenge that. I’m sure there are examples, but I have a hard time thinking of a sequel that killed off the protagonist. And then it was important for us not to kill them in a heroic way to kill them in this unceremonious, brutal, disgusting way. When we wrote that scene, it was meant to be disturbing to us, so we know it’s gonna be disturbing for fans of the first game.

On the surface, I could see fans of the first game being repelled by this. But if they dive in and see the heart of it, it’s like… Joel is throughout the whole story. You feel his presence through every beat of that story because his actions, his relationship with Ellie, permeate throughout the whole thing. And you see that in those flashbacks and in that final moment where Ellie is really reflecting about forgiveness, that final conversation that they had where she felt that he wronged her in such a way she was ready to be done with him. And yet she was able to let that go. And I think that’s Ellie’s humanity – the core that is still good within her, despite all these hard choices.

What did Troy Baker and Ashley Johnson think of the arcs for their characters?

Uh, haha. I remember the first time I pitched it to Ashley, it was right after I pitched her Left Behind, we were in a restaurant, and she was moved by that. And we’re about ready to shoot and I was like, oh, by the way, I have this other concept, this rough outline for what I think the sequel could be. And she was, like, just sobbing. But she loved it.

And I think Troy, in that same way… Look, the material was challenging even for them. I’ve seen people say online, basically, you disrespected the characters. Motherfuckers! No-one loves these characters more than we do.

Except for maybe Troy Baker. No-one loves Joel more than Troy Baker.

from EnterGamingXP https://entergamingxp.com/2020/07/a-spoiler-heavy-interview-with-the-last-of-us-part-2-director-neil-druckmann-%e2%80%a2-eurogamer-net/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=a-spoiler-heavy-interview-with-the-last-of-us-part-2-director-neil-druckmann-%25e2%2580%25a2-eurogamer-net

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