#and don’t scream at me when I call myself a fuck up RIGHT AFTER U SAID I WAS
Text
how to lose a guy in 10 days — csc
choi seungcheol x reader
genre : fluff, smut, enemies to lovers, jealousy (?), fake relationship, bets (yk how the movie goes), profanities
synopsis : you had to prove to your friends that you could easily make a guy lose interest within a week, having no interest in indulging yourself in a relationship after your past ones. all those relationships led you to narrow down a list on how to make a guy sick of you. you had all the card in your hands and seems like you don’t get to play it.
warnings : mdni, proceed with causion bc this is my first actual svt fic it might be shitty. not proofread lol, reminder that this is my take on the plot and it will not flow the exact same plots in the movie
i do not feel so confident about this bc i wrote this with mind in shambles. literally me comforting myself with svt while i'm dying from my studies rn :') pls tell me if you like it bc i would most def appreciate it <3
it was another slow day at work when you sat down at your desk and sighed. all your work mates and friends seems to confide in your reaction but your circle knew that this sigh wasn’t a “damn-im-so-stressed-and-sick-of-work-sigh” for them it was more of a “wow-life-is-hectic-its-almost-making-me-want-a-man”
and just like clockwork their brains clicked and hovered over your cubicle. poor u so startled that you almost gagged on your coffee.
“what?” you shooted
“are we gonna meet boyfriend number 13?” karina said in a sing song voice
“more like fling number 17?” sakura retorted
“maybe a first situationship since she haven’t experienced one yet” yunjin said curiously
“jesus christ i’ve had that much men and i’m not gay yet?” you said surprised
“maybe you just need a new set up?” yunjin asked
“like what doggy style?” karina questioned
“not like that you idiot” sakura glared
“maybe i’m just meant to end up in a church and dedicate my life to holiness” you huffed
“please you would burn the moment you step in a cathedral” sakura laughed
“well i just know how every relationships end, it’s almost like completing all endings for a video game, its predictable and cliche” you sighed
“let’s welcome fling number 17 then” karina announced
“i’m too tired for just fucks you know? it won’t take long before i actually get infection and i turn into a zombie and bite you all from all these stupid ideas” you rolled your eyes at your friends.
right now you just actually need to see if theres a guy out there in the world who could actually commit and actually accept a persons flaws out of love.
all too cheesy but you would like to find a partner who would find no flaws in you and probably just call them your little unique antiques that they can live with.
you were so sick on seeing tutorials or manifestation hacks on the internet because does anyone genuinely love each other anymore? all these “how to become a maneater”, “how to make them dream of you”, “how to make him fall in love using a potion” bullshit got you sick of people now.
why did god even create men to accompany themselves if they’re preferences and expectations are for the deities taste themselves.
“OH MY GOD I GOT IT!” yunjin screamed making all your peers look over to your area
“what is it?” you asked dying for a solution
“what if you meet a guy and just unfling him?” she said as if there was a light bulb above her head
“yall need to make her stop doing overtime” sakura deadpanned
“NOO, like you’re talking all these commitment things all the time then what if you find a random guy and make him not fall in love with you and see if he stays?” she said
“so like i should go out being an annoying red flag and see if he stays?” you giggle but it all went away when all your friends kind of agreed because they’re also sick of u having these guy problems already.
“i guess thats not all bad” karina suggests
“you should wear your best outfit tonight because we will find your lucky target then y/nnie” sakura winked at you before discussing the plans with yunjin and karina
it was not long until the night came as you got ready, you scoffed on how stupid this bet is because it’s like you claimed “very predictable and cliche” to lose a guy.
it was then your friends picked you up and pulled up to the bar. a few shots came by as you hustled through the crowd searching for your so called the one. but as you surf through the tables everyone fell short to your friends standards as if it was a big serious thing.
you grew tired, what was the point, you knew your fate then you should probably accept it now.
you drank your last shot for tonight planning your weekend with whole lots of tubs of ice cream until you flinched by karina grabbing your arm.
“him” she said, audible enough for the three of you to hear. you faced the guy she was referring to as all the noice fade into the background blur hearing yunjin screech and them clapping happily, your time froze.
the most goddamn, drop dead gorgeous man came to sight.
“isn’t that choi seungcheol?” sakura stating a rhetorical question
“they said no one could ever bag him up” yunjin replied
“ooh sounds like one of y/n’s guys” karina giggled.
“are you up for it then?” sakura challenged you
“please this will probably come by a breeze, so? 100 bucks each?” you winked as the three of them agrees after a total chaos.
“choi seungcheol, let the games begin” you muttered
on the other side of the bar there was a crowded group of 13 people who were mindlessly taking shot over shot as they were crowned as the most obnoxiously loud people for the night.
most of them spitting out tipsy thoughts to one another as they joined forces on pinning and choosing choi seungcheol as the victim for tonight.
“here comes the virgin joseph for tonight, choi seungcheol!” dk hooted while hoshi was giggling to any phrases the latter would make out
“isn’t it mary though?” joshua pondered drunkly on the edge of the couch munching on the nuts hoping it would make him sober as it was too early to go home.
“whatever, we still get the point. so what’s with the anti-women behavior cheol?” jeonghan grinned. his smile too wide to seem oblivious of the answer.
“i think dating is now deemed predictable to me,every woman i dated either wants my money, my body, fame, or a father figure” cheol sighed deeply
“wait you’re a dad?” dino’s brows furrowed in deep confusion as cheol stood there with utter disbelief
“i thought we we’re supposed to have a fun hangout today, and now all of you are just looking like alcoholics with all these bottles in our table” seungcheol complained
“WHO ARE YOU CALLING ALCOHOLICS?!” mingyu exclaimed looking at the opposite direction of where cheol was.
“FUCKER I DIDNT CALL YOU ANYTHING” minghao retorted to a confused mingyu facing him causing cheol to place a palm over his forehead.
“how about you start charming women for who you truly are?” vernon continuing the passed topic.
cheol didnt know if he was thankful for vernon re entering a topic, all the “seemingly” sober people joined up on the topic. they soon somehow convinced cheol to meet new people and try making them fall in love with him.
kkuma needed a mom, maybe he did too (but not in a maternal sense
“i doubt scoups can make a girl fall in love with him” dino giggled in the verge of passing out.
“i sure can ! it’s like a walk in the park” seungcheol defended.
“not even within a month” jeonghan added
“not even a week” jun stared blankly.
seungcheol always had placed his pride on a pedestal, it’s the source of his cocky behavior.
“oh please, give me 10 days it would be like she’s under a love spell” cheol snickered blanketing his bruised ego.
“deal, i bet 20 that we’ll have another meeting on the 10th day having cheol drop dead drunk at thus exact spot” jeonghan screamed only standing for the first time for the night.
it was chaos after that, but the group was almost divided equally in the process of them making bets and weighing the odds of cheol’s fate.
seungcheol wished the ground opened its jaws and buried him six feet under
even he was lying to himself with his statement, but one thing about choi seungcheol— he always wins.
“i’m gonna head home now” cheol said, he wish he didn’t.
he somehow wished that they were all too drunk to force him into the grave he dug himself. mercy will be the end of their bond, so as fate has written cheol’s fortune.
“i guess cheol is accepting his pussy title” jeonghan sighed
“i am not a pussy” cheol responded
“then i guess you’ll have to prove that” joshua sighed blankly at him
“let’s start by choosing the lucky girl who’s gonna take cheol’s v card”
“i’m not even a virgin” cheol rebutted with a frown, the liquor making him submit to his true emotions.
“please you barely lost it” dk laughed
“well i barely felt it….” cheol muttered
“let’s do her” dino pointed at the wall as he stood quickly stumbling with his head spinning
“who’s he pointing at? did he shave his eyes as well?” woozi said laughing
“shut up pink panty guy, i’m talking about the girl that has red hair and wearing a black dress” dino said laying on the floor
“ooh, she looks hot like seungcheol’s type” jun teased
if he didn’t spot your bright auburn hair he would’ve sworn to himself that these guys we’re just throwing a hate crime at him, but god, you we’re his type.
“go on mr. choi, show us your charm” mingyu pushing cheol closer to your area in the bar
you were planning on stepping up, but you had to make one thing sure, so you turned around to your friends with burgundy rushing through your cheeks with the thrill throwing you into your pit of endless thoughts.
“makeup, and outfit : perfect” yunjin started with a wide grin
“hair : gorgeous and can easily make a ponytail” karina winked as you glared at her
“teeth clean and ready for sucking” sakura smiled
jesus christ you were asking for a reality check and they just simply can’t avoid adding scandalous statements as if that’s all you do.
you were ready
were?
are?
was?
fuck.
you backed up quickly as you saw a guy charging at your direction ready to barf up on you.
quick arms catches your moving physique, as your back became dependent on the person unbeknownst to you.
two groups filled your senses with squeals, laughing and cheering waking you up from your not so cute dilemma
you turned to the person behind you seeing the man of the night
choi seungcheol.
“you okay, sweetheart?” his voiced hush, you felt warm and you swore that is was just the buzz from the liquor
quickly you went to work
“omg thankyou o-oppa” you’re voice cracked because you simply cannot believe the words that escaped your lips.
there was terror in his eyes, the moment you saw it, it went away. a pretty grin was graced upon your lips because this will be one hell of a ride
he better be sure to keep his seatbelts on because you’re gonna totally rock his world.
day 1 : the tortoise and the hare
spoiler, the hare never wins
guys hate being speedy, if they’re looking for a woman they can take home to his mom it would definitely not be the woman who wants to be dicked down after the first date.
and this wasn’t even a date
he took you to his place after your so called friends left the both of you in the landmine
he only intended you to sober up, and you only wanted him to curse you off his life. but it would be no fun if you just did it in a day, wouldn’t it?
the sound of the collision of class and marble led to both of your eyes to be met.
“thank you, really, or what else i would’ve smelled like vodka and whatever the fuck that person just ate” you sighed in relief genuinely
“no worries, you don’t smell like barf or vodka…. maybe a little of tequila but you’re good” he smiled
fuck. he’s hot and he knows it, a part of you wished that he was some sort of narcissist so you could do this thing in a easier way.
his face sculpted and graced with beauty his eyes filled with wisdom and maturity, his lips full and shaded like cherries.
you we’re definitely down to have a fling with him, but according to you, you were planning to change your ways and test the purpose and ability of men.
“mhm, i’m tired let’s watch a movie?” you smiled with your forced high-pitched voice
you love how he would hide the way his face would wince when you talk or the way his jaw slacked on your statement.
you smiled at the thought of him trying to take you out of his multi-million mansion because you were pushing boundaries he built for you
“yeah.. sure, what do you wanna watch?” he assisted you by the waist as he brought you up the stairs.
you wanted to get out, you wouldn’t think that it would go like this. fuck the boys manual maybe it doesn’t work with hot rich guys
“the notebook, i LOVE that movie” you smiled and you could see how he expected that
as you laid in his sheets, which you felt deeply sorry for actually staining his pearly and silky shits with your outside clothes, but your pride held you high. if you fell from your pride or for him then maybe then you could wash his sheets.
the room was dimly lit, the ambience warm as he intended.
he sat next to you, with distance for respect according to cheol’s brain.
you couldn’t predict him, and maybe he sends mix signals, and that made you feel less guilty because you concluded that he’s a womanizer. he knew all of these antics a little too well.
“it’s getting hot” you sighed fanning your face adjusting your dress to the right extent, you held your hair exposing your neck to him making sure he saw it.
"really? my ac is so low right now" he was surely acting oblivious.
you may be frustrated at him for not taking your hits but you guess it would make a good build up, meanwhile he was there dumbfounded from all the tricks you pulled, he was slowly getting hard but that's another story.
he was thinking if he should drop it, it seemed like you just wanted a one night stand, but speaking of the devil (angel) jeonghan sent him a text showing him how much money he would be getting if he proved them wrong.
somehow in the end all of his friends were convinced that he would stay bitchless. there was a whole chapter within their groupchat making fun of what he said earlier at the bar.
truth be told, he didn't give a fuck about the money, he wanted his dignity and pride back.
"my body is so warm because of all the shots i took though" you reasoned out quickly.
"well my body is really cool right now" he faced you slowly pulling you close but you had other plans
you quickly kissed him as if you were desperate for it.
"mmm- i think we should slow down y/n" he rushed to tell you.
you wanted to grin so bad, victory laid on your side, but you had to put a sad face asking him if he no longer likes you repeatedly as he escorted you out of his house.
you quickly twirled and skipped across the road when you were sure he was inside already. he was there though, watching through his window.
maybe he had to step up.
day 2 : the in-laws
there was not a single text on cheols phone the next morning, soon learning your phone was inside the purse you left at his house.
he wanted to scan your purse thinking of a way to sweep you off your feet today. but a gentleman doesn't mess with a ladies purse.
after the the long chat you had last night, you exchanged your details to each other which now led cheol to your apartment building with flowers and a wide smile.
"hi i got these for you-"
"wait cheollie, say hi to your mom !" you cut him off with a smile
his face quickly shifting, you what?! he was slowly shaking on the inside quickly settling down your purse, flowers on your coffee table.
"h-hi mommm" he grinned as if his mom could see him.
"seungcheol i didn't raise you to hide your partners from me like this, i really like y/n you know, so when's the wedding?" his mom ushered
"a wedding?" you gasped and started screeching as if it was real
"we'll see mom haha.." he replied deranged from the situation made just 2 minutes ago. he quickly hung up before his mom could get any more ideas.
"well that was interesting, i didn't know that you knew my mom" he restrained himself from losing himself.
"well i have to meet your parents anyways right, cheollie?" you smiled at him
"yeah, but we just met yesterday" he deadpanned
"well, you don't think we're gonna work out" you started sobbing in front of him making small obnoxious hiccups
"well that's not what i meant baby" he hushed and spent the afternoon babying you while whispering sweet nothings in your ear.
day 3 : monday flings
"i seriously cannot fathom how much patience he has to reach day 3" you genuinely lay your opinion
"i was a complete total psycho, but he must be mental" you said to yourself
"that's fucking crazy because if i had to put up with that you would never hear from me again" sakura said bluntly which bruised and praised you at the same time
"i need a break from my alter ego as well, i hope he has no plans on asking me on anything anymore at least"
the day went as if you had never met choi seungcheol at all, which made you relieved for at least having a rest day, sure it was such a short time but god how tiring it was to be somebody else
"i just really realized how to fit in somebody else's shoes" you sighed as you and your friends exited the building together ready to go home and simply pass out.
"then don't fucking wear them" karina said
"but this is the whole point, being a stereotypical woman in a relationship"
you all soon parted in your own ways as you walked through the neighborhood near yours, you realized you just walked passed by seungcheol's house and this made you walk a bit faster and try to fabricate your distinguishable looks. but guess what
"aw baby don't hide from me" he coos slowly pulling you in his embrace.
"i was just looking for you" he smiled as he rushed you into his home
you somehow wished he could just stab you right now.
he led you to his living room filled with rose petals and candles dedicating a whole playlist of his vinyl records for you. you spent the evening sharing his home cooked dinner, which was actually delicious. and he soon brought out his photo albums from when he was a kid.
"do you think our children look just like you?' your sentence made you freak out but you supressed it wanting him to be affected by your vicious visions.
"how about we go back about the marriage thing for now" he faked out a laugh.
"i want this to be our family's house too" you sighed in content while scanning the architectural structure.
"if that's what you want" he smiled and pecked your forehead, which had caught you by a surprise.
"it is" you smiled, you didn't want to admit it but something formed within you when he said that.
"i'll be having a boys night tomorrow so i might not respond quickly to your texts"
"is it strictly 'boys only' ?" you asked forming an idea and swallowing these funny feelings that have bloomed within you.
"well it had always been"
day 4 : poker night
if fate was inevitable, they should you hit you up then.
you were in a cab with your hands filled with cheol's place in mind.
"cheol having a 4 day record is worth celebrating" jeonghan teased
"it's been that long?" mingyu asked actually impressed
"i've been in a lot of relationships since college, stop making it seem like im a loser" he sighed
"probably just in college" minghao retorted
"it's probably going well, maybe next year she could meet his parents" seungkwan noted
"please, she met them the second day we met" cheol answered scoffing at the thought
"now i know why girls are driven away from you" jun cringed at cheol
"she called them herself the day we met, she even said that our children will live here, and she tried to sleep with me the first day we met !" cheol finally shared his experience the past few days
"ooh feisty and a woman with a plan, that's so horanghae coded" hoshi smiled reaching his palms out and curling the ends of her fingers.
"you're going delusional again hamster" minghao smacked the back of hoshi's head causing the latter to relieve it by rubbing his head.
"maybe cheol could get laid now with her bold behavior, someone who can tame mr. pride-over-pants-down-choi-seungcheol over here" joshua said
"she's just a bet-"
the violent reactions that flashed through the faces of his group-mainly cheol when you came in the door in the middle of the game.
the guys quickly recovered teasing cheol for being so attached already calling her over for a boys night.
"hi guys!!" you said excitingly trying on your best cute expression you could muster up while hoshi replied to you with the horanghae pose as you quickly reciprocated it.
"i just thought i could put some of my stuff here so you could always remember me cheollie" your eyes twitching the moment your face was parallel with the wall
cheol was in awe with the first few vases you put out, until there were at lest 13 in his living room only. his house looking like he was out there selling urns
you were going around his place disrupting them, even changing their ambient music into some of britney spear's playlist
and even making very concerning screams around the kitchen just behind the living room.
"cheollie, can you get me some water" you whined when you heard them telling cheol it was his turn
he caught you reaching out unto the cupboards for a glass, he quickly got you what you requested and leaving you there
you were quick to grab onto his arm and grab the cigarette out of his mouth.
"you need to stop smoking" you tell him genuinely, his demeanor sensing your honesty his brows rested as he gave you a smile.
"i need to keep my lungs healthy for our children huh?" he teased you with a knowing smile
day 5 : ghosting
after his game with the boys, you two spent so much time together after.
he was being sulky after receiving his first losing game last night from all your disruptions last night.
but he never mentioned you being a nuisance, and just maybe because it was stored somewhere deep his chest the frustrations he held
but you stayed clingy to him filling him up with your presence even when you already went home flooding his texts until it was dawn
today you decided to stay low, you were lying in wait in this part of the plan
by doing so much the past few days today you decided to give ghosting a shot
"god i just wanna die if i need to go through this just to find a decent human being" you sighed frustrated at yourself
you wish you could stop now, there was 150 bucks on the line
or this is what you thought that hindered from you from stopping, you stared longingly on your laptop
quickly dialing his number you grinned at the sound of his voice
day 6 : a large iced diet coke and a kiss to go
today you planned on watching a knicks game with cheol, it was both your favorite thing to watch.
the stadium filled with cheers as you were shaking with thrill watching the tight game among your favorite team handling each other by the neck
most of the game went well according to cheol
during the break the venue managers continued to do the kiss cam.
you were interested looking at random people sharing affection through this stupid camera. but you didn't know it would face you.
you saw your face light up with surprise as the other guy next to you exposed on the kiss cam
you were looking at him
"i'm-" the guy was cut off when seungcheol grabbed you by the nape sealing your lips with his plush ones, the camera then panning to the both of you instead of you and the other guy.
"you weren't in the kiss cam" you said smiling- wait no don't.
"well i was just now" he said cockily
"i'm not gonna let you kiss him when i'm here" he said and that lit a fire within you
the final part of the game resumed as you both were cheering wildly through the crowds
it was time.
you asked cheol to bring you coke since you were extremely famished according to your words.
cheol quickly glanced at you, the bottom of the stadium, on the scoreboard, and back to your eyes.
he quickly ran getting you the drink that you wanted.
"i cant drink too much sugar though i need the diet one" his face turning into a distressed one jogging back up the long steep flights of stairs as he huffed to the vendor that you wanted the coke one, being only available to watch the game through the small monitor by the ceiling
there was about 3 minutes left, your team still having time to win over
he rushed back to you quickly handing you your coke, but there was another thing-
"i need ice cheollie" you whined at him, he groaned but still went over to do it
only a few moments left before the game ends the vendor still working on you precious drink, seungcheol staring at the monitor.
you felt bad, like actually. but you had to keep this up
you were enjoying the game until you were drowned in your thoughts on how you were ever gonna ask for his forgiveness after all this
you were a bitch and get over your act.
the crowd calling out through your ears realizing your favored team won, you had to force a smile especially a lovely one at cheol to make him think you were being a menace
maybe if you pushed him enough you could end this sooner, you can't admit that he was charming, handsome, and his behavior is no less than how a gentleman should act.
sorry coups.
the game ended, you were exiting the venue with cheol as his arm around your shoulder quickly calling you a cab home.
"thank you for this babe" you smiled passing him the cup, hoping you were rude enough for him to not call you up anymore
"no problem, you gave me your other ticket to watch with you anyway" he smiled pecking you before you left.
he crumpled the cup and threw it away.
day 7 : the revelation
you and cheol spent this day with a quick breakfast by the small cafe nearby, chatting through the busy streets of your city, he asked you to come to his event tomorrow which you accepted. after breakfast there were barely any interactions coming between the two of you.
why stay through this conditions?
well we bring you to the day 1
you were troubled writing your new article on the magazine company you were working for.
your boss expecting so much from you, you simply cannot write anything too political or anything controversial at all, so you stuck on to writing these stupid "how to" to articles which was a huge success for your company.
you were stuck, nothing to write, drafts filled with calling out peace for all countries experiencing genocide and territorial invasions or calling out to politicians who were legitimately caught only on scandalous events but never the seat of any meetings.
you were a writer a "how to girl", you swore you did it all and wrote them, how to talk your way out of a ticket, how to feng shui your apartment and even having those little tests you wrote printed by the magazine.
seungcheol was a lawyer, he stayed in his grandfathers law firm, his grandfather desperate for him to get wed and have a family who will take care of the firm and would take care of him as well.
seungcheol's grandfather knew his luck in love, so he prayed that even when he passes, his grandson will still have someone to be with.
day 8 : pride over love
cheol came over to your place at dusk seeing you with your flattering yellow dress with a backless cut on the back.
he was stunned by your beauty, his hand leading to his chest.
"my god" he whispered to himself as he paced closer to you
"you're gorgeous" he smiled as he kissed your temple
"you don't look to bad yourself" you grinned at him
you decided to stay in your apartment for a while as you settled a few of your stuff before you leave
he glanced over your record player and fidget over your albums then he finally sat down digesting the whole essence of your place, it was hard for him to stay still thinking that you were some dumb bet but he knew you were more than that, he knew you we're attractive but the breeze tonight was only revealing your true selves to each other.
you came in the room with your purse settling it by the coffee table as your favorite song came by, you couldn't help but singing along to it
and other girls dreamed that they'd be cheol's partner
they'd be cheol's partner and
you're so vain
you probably think this song is about you
and then you both exploded in to giggles proceeding to do silly dances before heading out.
you both arrive at an immaculately decorated building, you could already hear all the people chattering inside the building making a light buzz on your ears
"cheol, you should come meet our new stockholder" his coworker ushered him as he looked at you with slight worry
"i'll be fine you should go" you pushed him lightly and he just nodded at you making a phone call sign telling u to call him if anything happens
it was a while when you were just sitting by the bar drinking your nth drink for the night, it wasn't your intention to do so, but that was the only thing that can occupy you. you didn't want to bother cheol on his night so you stayed lowkey.
you weren't drunk but you rethink because you didn't know why seungcheol's grandfather ushering you to talk to him.
"so i heard that you have been seeing my grandson" he started
"oh yeah i am" you politely answered, guilt wrapping you up when you realized that you were only feigning everything.
"i'm glad that he told me about a girl he goes out with, he barely tells me anymore because they don't last long" he giggled
"oh really? i would expect him to be married by now actually" you joked with him
you felt comfortable around him, his friends, his relatives, and even his co workers, they really provided you with a nice environment.
"i'm happy that you stayed with him even after knowing that you just started as a bet-"
"excuse me?" you were violated.
"i mean please excuse me i need to get some fresh air"
there was regret in mr.choi's face but it also held worry, was it true? you were a bet? what did he win for you? for this? what did he mean that you started as a bet?
you were furious, you knew you were also doing him wrong, but you felt bad for all of it.
it wasn't helping that you had to admit to yourself that you did like him. even through the fucked up situations you had this week, it was all messed up, fake.
but even in all that chaos, he was consistent, he was there.
now you're doubting if that was his acting as well
because now you were burning everywhere, because you knew you crossed the fine line along the feigned adoration over real devotion.
you adore choi seungcheol.
but now that meant nothing.
quick and heavy foot steps were heard behind you
"y/n!" cheol managed out with huffed breaths
you faced him with disdain painting your face.
“wow, you’re gonna run away after you defy me?” he laughed sarcastically, his face sullen his eyes filled with fury
“defy you? what about you making me a bet?” it dawned on him realizing that you knew about his faults too.
it was true, you did defy him, not that it was your choice, you had to do it for your job, you wrote about him, one of your how-to blog and magazine experiments.
how to lose a guy in 10 days
this was your last project being a part of this magazine line. you swore you couldn’t keep on using people for an article, you planned on being a journalist after quitting, after making him your last.
because after all, you love him.
your article could also be called “how to stupidly fall in love and find a man in 10 days”
“it was a bet at first, then i fell, but you just played me” he looked at you as if you just stabbed him straight to the chest
“what?” you said confused
“leave. i don’t ever wanna see you anymore” he warned
“didn’t know you could stoop so low, and don’t worry i will”
“how to lose a guy in 10 days huh?” he started “lucky you y/n because you just lost him” he uttered walking away.
the night turned completely upside down, both of your chests swelled with guilt, shame and anger.
your heart dropped, but you just swallowed you pride and left.
day 9 : drive me out of town
quickly packing your things to leave, you won’t do any good here now that everything is tainted by the man you met just a little more than a week ago.
you spent your whole day just wallowing the sadness from your love life leaving your friends, your apartment.
you published that article about choi seungcheol to have income before you left your low life and start as a struggling journalist to do what you always wanted, to write about more important things
conventional, innovative, a cry of the oppressed.
but people seemed to worry if blondes were more fun than brunettes.
you truly regret using him, but you both did the wrong things to the write people, only fate knew that.
you rode your cab ready to leave this damned city to move to another identical one.
the familiar streets slowly blurred into the abyss of the distance as you called your friends and relatives one by one just catching up and telling them little life updates.
you were sad, but you knew that seungcheol is probably feeling a lot more than you were.
the darkness of the sky basked you a sense of comfort, there’s always a new day.
you wished him peace.
it was a fault writing about him and confessing about you felt at the same time, but he deserved the last bit if honesty left to your fake situationship.
a raging motorcycle suddenly honks at your vehicle endlessly. your cab giving way but it seemed like it wasn’t what the motor rider meant
“OH MY GOD PLEASE STOP” you told the cab driver when you realized it was cheol’s bike.
was he planning to run you over?
you got out displaying yourself in front of the man you loved.
“y/n, it was all true” he said taking his helmet off he huffed tiredly but not slowing down his pace to get close to you
“what are you saying?”
“i liked you that’s why i agreed with the bet, hoping you would like me back, even though your personality was hard to work with” he laughed to himself
“why are you saying this? why now?”
“maybe i flipped the page too quick not seeing that you loved me as well”
“love”
“what?”
“i still love you” you whispered
“you won your bet a little too well mr.choi seungcheol”
“i love you too, and i don’t care if you pull your annoying your girl antics i still love you”
“that wasn’t me” you laughed
“well there was a part of you who did it, and i love all of you” he smiled showing his gummy grin.
you couldn’t help but feel free, you weren’t stuck in that annoying girl’s body forcing the guy you love to hate you.
“kiss me, cheol” you teared up
he didn’t need to be told twice as he rushed to close the distance between the two of you, his lips crashing to yours savoring every inch of it. your head shifting in sync as you both connected not wanting to let go.
today’s day 1. the first day of making it real.
day 10 : my heart, it lies within yours.
passed 12 am
i guess you did actually lose your bet now with your friends. at day 10 choi seungcheol was plush against your skin his lips in yours, and your hands in his hair.
“i hate that you have me wrapped around your finger” he groaned onto your lips
“i hate that you actually won your stupid bet” you sighed
“i always win, and this feels so much better than winning” he said lifting you
your bags left on the floor the moment you reached his home, he told you to call it yours as well, from now on.
your silence didn’t last long when the both of you were longing for each other leading you up to this moment.
“hm so cocky huh?” you teased him as you started kissing down on his neck as he laid you on his bed.
you pulled down on his tie realizing he was so busy at work all day.
you kissed him once more and switching the positions that you were previously on as you climbed onto his lap and continued making out
your hands wandering on his hair and his hands on your ass.
your tongue interacting as he let you do whatever you want, his hands started wandering on your body leaving your skin burning for more.
your kiss being more needy as you started to grind on his hard on. he groaned onto your lips leaving you to grind harder.
you started to unbutton his clothes as he followed suit, removing yours as well.
he was pulling on his tie
“no” you stopped him
“keep it on love” you commanded
he could throw you and turn this around, but he didn’t. he enjoyed this a little too much, loving the feeling of being taken care of.
you both were left on your under garments except him having his tie on
he looked so hot having his tie rest on his smooth and hard muscles, his abs and pecs shining from the moonlight.
you continued grinding on him until he held your hips to stop.
“let me have you first please” he sighed as he laid you down on the bed as he knelt on the ground facing your crotch.
he looked at you as if he was asking if he could remove it and you nodded back at him.
his blonde hair a bit messy as you caressed it and tugging while he was removing your underwear
his face getting closer to your heat as he started kissing on your thighs slowly.
his lips then met with your clit as he sucked slowly then proceeding to lap on your entrance already making it soaking than it already was.
his tongue bending slightly when met with the entrance teasing it and slowly stretching it.
his right hand caressing around your waist as the left one kept it on your thigh refraining it from moving.
his fingers slowly worked his mouth as he slowly dipped one into your hole.
his finger was thick, 2 of your fingers were your frequently used ones, but his reached so much deeper, felt so fuller.
he hummed against your clit as vibrations flooded through your veins. he added another finger making you writhe and pull on his hair more.
you pulled him up kissing his plump lips before making him lay down on the bed.
you held his hands as you put it above his head, you weren’t intending to restrain them at all.
his biceps protruding so well when you raised it keeping it there as you licked and sucked on his neck slowly removing his boxers.
you wanted to cum with him tonight.
his eyes went dark seeing his large dick lining up to your entrance, he wanted you to ride him, he wanted to stare at your beautiful body while you felt pleasure because of him.
"no condom?" he asked heavily, he wanted it, he wanted this, but he also wants to make sure that you're doing what you desire, not wanting to make regrets again.
"i don't care, fill me up, make me pregnant" you said in a daze, but even without the lust you had right now, you still would say yes.
"fuck" he groaned hearing your words
his length standing tall, he was already so girthy, his tip leaking red.
he wanted to feel pleasure with you, not just sitting there like some fuck doll.
you lined the tip with your entrance as you slowly sunk down already feeling an enormous stretch.
"god your cock is so big" you moaned as you rested your head by his neck sucking there to distract yourself from the slight pain.
his hands went down to your waist as he pushed you further, taking him all in.
he was sent to paradise with your walls crashing to his length, engulfing it in its warmth
"your pussy was made just for me, love" he groaned as his hands guided your waist to ride him.
you were releasing moans as you rode him, it's as if he was still getting bigger inside you.
you then leaned back to your position staring at him with his tie, he looked so hot with his abs clenching every time you squeeze his dick, and how his sweat made it look like he was glowing.
he was laying back with the most drunk in lust face he got as he bit his lower lip just staring at you bouncing at him.
every curve of him filled you even more hitting the right spots that led you to your high in a few more moments.
you both released at the same time, but cheol was far from over with you
he flipped you around entering you in a missionary position, he was truly strong as he pumped himself in you with a new found energy hitting even deeper than before.
he caressed the bump his dick made deep on your stomach.
he made a guttural moan just by the thought of you being able to carry his children by the very belly he's fucking oblivion to.
you pulled onto his tie causing it to tighten a bit that he moaned. you kissed him sloppily as your saliva mixed and dripped to the side of your chin.
he went down leaving marks on your delicate skin, already having red marks on your neck, he made sure to give your tits some love.
he sucked onto your left one and massaged the one on your right, continuously flicking it. his other hand made its way to massage your clit, which made your back arch and scream his name.
"fuck seungcheol" you moaned
"seungcheol? i thought you called me cheollie" he smiled at you with a shit eating grin
you could barely even give a response, you were simply brain dead from all the pleasure you had.
his pace going faster and faster as massaged your clit to a higher intensity, you both were sent over the edge for the second time tonight.
he slowly removed his length, as your hole felt the emptiness you groaned. your mixed arousal slipping out of your pussy as cheol just stared at it.
he inserted two fingers fucking the cum back into her, you moaned at overstimulation, he continued fucking you with his fingers.
"aren't you doing too much mr. choi?" you glared at seungcheol.
"gonna make sure you keep all of it" he said as she shakes his head giggling.
you pulled him down onto the bed as you sat up stuffing your underwear in his mouth making him moan out loud.
"your turn?" you grinned.
i felt like i could do better :") im sorry if this is bad.
taglist <3
@luchiet @sebongmochi @yawnseu @christinewithluv @musingsofananxiouspotato @raggedypansexual @90s-belladonna @nerdycheol @xcynthiaaa @inexistent-bluemind @jenoxygen @i-dont-give-a-fok @nmosyne @sleepzyy @justanarchiveforfics @springdaybreaks @k07-1313 @dunixxd
#seventeen x reader#seventeen#seventeen oneshot#seventeen imagines#seventeen x you#seventeen fic#choi seungcheol#seungcheol#seungcheol svt#seungcheol x reader#seventeen smut#seventeen fluff#seungcheol smut#scoups x reader#scoups fluff#scoups scenarios#scoups#svt scoups#scoups smut#svt x reader#svt imagines#svt smut#svt fluff#svt#svthub#svt fanfic
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w1sh u were here
Pairings: Hobie Brown x Reader
Word Count: 809 words
Kink: Sexting
Warnings: NSFW, sexting, sending nudes, technically pornography?, swearing, dirty texting...
A/N: I lied, I am posting today bc I managed to pull something out of my ass. I hope you enjoyed this short fic bc the hardest thing about this was making all of Hobie's texts. I am a firm believer in Hobie being a terrible texter bc he doesn't commit to one style, and I hate him for it. Enjoy this fluffy smut. <3
hobes: I can’t stop thinking about you, luv.
you: oh yeah? what are you thinking about?
hobes: jus wonderin wut ur wearin 😘
you: your hoodie
hobes: and?
you: nothing.
You sent an image.
hobes: fuck…
hobes: You look fuckin amazing in my clothes babe
you: thx bby
hobes: you’d look even better without em tho. Just sayin
you: you tryna get me to send nudes, perv?
hobes: Maybe…😉
hobie: w1sh u were here rn
you: me too
you: what would you do if i was?
hobes: i’d kiss you. a lot. i’d never stop kissing you luv
hobes: And, after that, I’d play with your nipples and listen to you start to moan. I’d be so hard for you, sweetheart…
you: yeah?
hobes: yea. id suck on ur tits and feel how wet u were for me.
you: how would you touch me?
hobes: Id put my fingers in your tight pussy, feel you up nice and good, rub at your little clit.
hobes: You’d be fucking soaking, I know it. I’d eat you up, darling.
hobes: tell me wut u want me to do to u luv
you: everything you said. want you to kiss me, want you to touch me, want your tongue on my tits and your fingers in me.
hobes: want me to eat you up?
you: yes
hobes: I’d make you feel so good. You’d be moaning so loud for me.
you: i wanna ride your face, hobie
hobes: i want you to ride my face
you: guess what?
hobes: wut?
you: i’m touching myself.
hobes: fuck. for me?
you: all for you.
You sent a video.
“Fuck, Hobie. Wish you were here…”
hobes: chr1st u sound so pretty when u rub ur cl1t l1ke that
hobes sent a video.
“I need your pretty little pussy over here, sweetheart. See what you do to me?”
you: fuck, you’re so hard
you: you know what i wanna do?
hobes: Tell me.
you: wanna get on my knees and suck you off.
hobes: yeah?
you: yeah. i wanna feel your hands in my hair when i suck your cock. want you to call me your good girl.
hobes: u r my good girl, babes. ur my best fukn girl.
you: fuck, i’m so wet for you, hobie. wish you were here to touch me. my fingers don’t work as well as yours do…
hobes: Can’t get em far enough? You need my fingers to stretch you out nice and wide?
you: yeah.
you: want you to pin me to a wall and fuck me
hobes: fuck youd love that wouldnt you?
hobes: I’d pin your hands above your head and kiss you, turn you around and hold onto your beautiful fucking hips. You’d be squirming when I put my cock in you.
hobes: Youd be beggin me to fuck you darling and youd be moanin like fuckin crazy for me, Id hold your tits and keep you still while I fucked you from behind and you would scream when you came on my cock. Id just keep fuckin you too
hobes: still with me luv?
you: hard to type with one hand
hobes: gonna fucken take you to bed and put your legs on my shoulders. fold you in half while i fucked you babes. you’d be all messy for me.
you: i’m messy for you right now
You sent an image.
“Mmm. Ah, I need you, baby. Fuck, m-yeah…”
you: this pussy’s missing you, baby
hobes: this dick’s missing you
hobes: I’m gonna cum, sweetheart.
you: me too
you: hobie i’m so close.
hobes: will you send me another pic baby?
You sent a video.
“Hobie! Hobie, I’m cumming! Fuck, I miss you so much. Ahhh, fuck!”
hobes sent a video.
“Fuck. Mm-mmh, fuck. Yeah. Oh, fuck, yeah! Oh, sweetheart.”
hobes sent an image.
you: fuck, hobie
hobes sent a voice message.
“I love you, sweetheart. Wish you were here so I could show you how much. You make me so happy and you get me so hard, and I can’t wait to see you soon so I can kiss that pretty face you’ve got. Love you so much, darling.”
You sent a voice message.
“I love you, too, baby. I can’t wait to see you either because, when I do, I’m kissing you so hard, you’ll pass out.”
You sent a voice message.
“Get some sleep… I know you have to go to 928 tomorrow, and you’ll come see me after. I’ll be waiting for me. I love you.”
hobes: i luv u 2 bby
you: your typing is atrocious.
hobes: Thank you.
you: goodnight, bayb
hobes: “bayb”
you: shut the fuck up.
hobes: make me 😍
you: you make me sick.
hobes: I love you, too. Night.
you: night. go to sleep now.
hobes: no <3
You changed “hobes” to “hobo”.
hobo: :(
Tag yourself here...
#hobie brown#hobie brown x reader#hobie brown x reader smut#hobie brown smut#hobie brown x you#hobie brown fanfic#hobie brown fanfiction#across the spiderverse#across the spiderverse fanfiction#reader insert#female reader#fanfic#fanficiton#kinktober
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A REQUEST FOR LIP PLEASEEE!! him getting hammered in a party then he calls you to rescue him or smth then you gotta drag him and drive him back home. he asks you sleep over and you stayed! thats basically my idea u can develop it however u like <333 can be fluff alone or added w a bit of spice🤭 but we’ll enjoy it nevertheless
Drunk Mind, Sober Heart
Pairing: Lip Gallagher x fem! Reader
Warnings: mentions of alcohol, angst (nothing happens bc Lip is drunk), dirty talk, language
Summary: *in req*
Word Count: 2.5k
An ear splitting noise startled me awake. I shot up, my eyes flinging open, only to discover that my bedroom was completely dark.
Was that my alarm?
No, there is no way in hell it was eight in the morning already.
I groaned in frustration and reached for my bedside table. As my eyes adjusted, I ran my palm along the smooth wood, my bedroom gradually coming into view. Unfortunately, my vision was not properly adjusted to perceive the small black box. My hand pushed a mysterious object, and a soft thud echoed.
“Shit!”
I exclaimed. I threw my torso off the bed and inspected the carpeted floor for my phone.
Whoever was calling me at this hour was gonna get it.
When I realized I didn't have much time before the call went to voicemail, I quickened my pace, grunting from the unexpected effort.
“Yes!”
The artificial glow burned into my retinas as I flipped the phone over to expose the screen. I was forced to squint so I could see who had the audacity to call me at such an inconvenient hour.
I rolled my eyes.
Of fucking course.
With a sour attitude, I accepted the call. I was miffed at Lip for ruining my perfect night of restful sleep.
“What? This better be good Lip, or I’m gonna be really pissed.”
I flopped onto the bed and fixed my gaze on the boring ceiling. On the other end of the line, there was a cacophony of voices and screams. It was so loud that it resembled a roar. To prevent going deaf, I moved the phone a few inches from my ear.
“Heyyyyyy Y/N. How are ya?”
Every syllable lacked clarity. Oh, come on, why did I have to be the one getting booty called tonight? I disregarded his inquiry and instead put forth my own.
“Lip, what time is it?”
I inquired in part to gauge his level of inebriation and in part because I was too sluggish to remove my phone from my ear to check the time.
“Uhhhh- that’s a great question.”
There was rustling from the other end of the line.
“It’s 9 oh 3.”
I cocked a brow.
“You sure about that?”
“Uh-hold on. Gimmie a sec.”
Rustling.
“Do you read from left to right or right to left?”
I couldn’t help but laugh. At the very least, this would make a good story in a few days after I recovered from my extreme sleep deprivation.
“Left to right, at least in English.”
“Okay, thanks. You’re so smart.”
Rustling.
“Okay, it’s 3 oh 9. Well… 3:10 now.”
I tried to shake the sleep from my brain by closing my eyes and gently kneading my soft eyelids.
“That’s just perfect. You do remember me saying I had an 8 am class today, right?”
“Yes I do. I just-I lost my phone, and yours is the-the only phone number I remember.”
He had never been this drunk before. Lip had a very high tolerance for alcohol. The number of drinks he must have consumed to get to this point is beyond my comprehension. His speech was becoming more slurred by the second, almost as if he were nodding off.
I completely ignored the fact that he used his phone to call me. He was comprehending very little at this moment.
“How many drinks have you had, Lip?”
Silence.
“Uh-that’s another great question…”
His voice trailed off. I sure hope he didn't doze off on me.
“Alright Lip, don’t fall asleep.”
I threw myself into a sitting position and switched on the bedside table lamp. The room instantly filled with bright light. My eyes watered. I squinted to accommodate the abrupt change.
“Where are you? I’ll come pick you up.”
I tucked the phone between my shoulder and ear as I reached down to put on my slippers.
“Uh-I don’t know the address.”
I rolled my eyes.
“Alright, well, can you give me any information that could help me find you?”
I stood, the phone pressed to my ear. I threw a light jacket over my shoulders to hide the fact that I wasn't wearing a bra.
“Uh-it’s down the street from an old gas station.”
I knew exactly where he was. There was only one party host who lived next to an old gas station.
“Are you at Christian’s house?”
“No. Well, actually, I don’t know.”
I walked to my front door, shaking my head in disbelief. I plucked my car keys from the wood tray by the door, twirling them between my fingers. The silence that engulfed my apartment complex was deafening compared to the soft jingle.
“I’ll come and get ya’. Just give me ten minutes. Don’t move a muscle.”
“Okay. I’ll be waitin’ for ya on the front lawn.”
“Perfect.”
I drove slowly, not in a hurry to arrive at Christian's house. Lip could handle himself when he was drunk. Sure, he said stupid shit at times, but if I truly believed he was a danger to himself, I would increase my urgency.
Not even a meek flicker of light could be seen in the windows of nearby houses. My car was engulfed in darkness. Everything was pitch black save for a few street lamps that did little to penetrate the gloom. The world was still and silent.
It reminded me of the twilight zone. I was imprisoned in an environment where time did not exist. I was alone. There were no people who could guide me. I was trapped.
That was the impression I had up until I arrived at Christian's house. The street was lined with parked cars. There were sober individuals mixed in with those who were stumbling drunk. Christian’s house was bursting at the seams. People could be seen congregating on the lawn, in the upper windows, shoving their way inside, and shoving their way out. I stopped my car in front of the grass. Sure enough, Lip was standing on the front lawn, gazing at the street with a blank stare.
I giggled. He looked lost.
I opened my car window and protruded my head outside.
“Lip Gallagher! Your chauffeur is here!”
I shouted sarcastically. My joke elicited a few giggles from various partygoers. A stupidly uneven smile appeared on Lip’s face as he awoke from his stupor.
“Oh hi, Y/N! I didn’t even know you were coming!”
“Get in Lip. I’m gonna take you home.”
Lip walked over, nearly tripping ten times in the short distance he had to cover. I laughed at his erratic behavior.
“You're gonna sit in the back, Lip?”
I caught a glimpse of him in the rearview mirror. His head was leaning against the headrest, and his eyes were closed. He looked serene. Lip jerked awake. His half lidded eyes hurriedly scanned the back of my car as if expecting company.
“Uh-no. I’ll sit in the front.”
I anticipated that he would exit the vehicle and move to the front seat. Instead, he launched himself over the center console.
“Jesus Lip!”
I exclaimed, a flurry of limbs obstructing my view. His body relaxed as he sank into the passenger seat.
“That’s better. It’s much more comfortable up here.”
I scoffed and decided not to participate in this pointless conversation.
Lip didn't speak once during the entire drive back to his apartment, which surprised me. His breathing evened out. I could only assume that he had dozed off. His head would softly crash into the window when I crossed a bump in the road. Although the position didn't appear to be comfortable, Lip was too far gone to bother.
I parked in front of Lip’s dorm complex.
“Lip.”
The mere mention of his name caused Lip to instantly become alert, his hands fumbling all over my car.
“Yes?”
I grinned.
“Do you need help walking or can you manage?”
“I got it.”
Lip stumbled out of the vehicle and looked up at his run-down dorm building. Thank God he was at a dorm and not in his chaotic home. Only occasionally have I had to pick up Lip from a party. Yet, I always seem to run into one of Fiona's conquests who is using the cover of night to elude detection.
“This isn’t my house.”
“Yes it is.”
“No, it’s not.”
“Lip, you moved. You live in a dorm now.”
Lip squinted, still not convinced.
“Oh!”
His eyes widened as his face relaxed.
“Yeah, I remember now.”
We moved slowly as we ascended the stairs. Lip kept stumbling forward, tripping, falling, then shooting back up. The cycle was then repeated ten steps later. Eventually I caved and slung his arm over my shoulder to quicken the process.
“Are your roommates home?”
I wanted to ignite a casual conversation because I could feel Lip growing heavier. I was struggling under his weight and quickly ran out of breath.
“Yes. Actually, no. I don’t think so. I think they left town.”
“Where did they go?”
“They went… to- somewhere.”
Thank God. I could throw Lip on his bed, tuck him in, and leave without any awkward encounters.
I threw Lip’s dorm room open and reached for the lightswitch.
“Noooooo. Don’t turn on the lights.”
I reconciled.
“Alright. Whatever you say.”
It was the home stretch. Lip’s bed was in sight.
I threw him onto it. Under his weight, the springs groaned loudly, disturbing the peace.
“Alright Lip, looks like my work here is done.”
I couldn't help but smile as I turned to leave. Even though I adored Lip and knew this would make a great story, I was eager to crawl into bed.
“Wait…”
He said meekly.
I turned, exhaling an exasperated sigh.
“What now?”
In the ten seconds that I was looking elsewhere, he had somehow gotten himself into a seated position.
“Come here.”
With the most threatening voice his inebriated mind could conjure, he demanded. I rolled my eyes as I approached him.
His expression was sluggish. He seemed to be in a drug-induced coma. Lip’s eyes were half lidded and the corners of his mouth were slightly upturned in a silly manner.
I came to a halt about a foot and a half in front of him.
“Come closer.”
I scoffed, crossing my arms over my chest and taking a step forward.
“Closerrrrrr.”
He was undoubtably fucking with me. But whatever, I’ll play his stupid game. I took another step forward, our knees brushing.
A slight smirk appeared on his lips as he glanced at me through his thick lashes.
Shit.
What have I gotten myself into?
Lip encircled my thighs with his large hands, tugging me forward until the waistband of my shorts was level with his nose.
The air hitched in my throat.
“Lip!”
I exclaimed.
Lip began pressing tender kisses to the tops of my bare thighs, maintaining intense eye contact.
“Come on Y/N, live a little.”
I chuckled, my face flushed with embarrassment, despite the fact that Lip was completely unaware of his actions.
“Lip you really are drunk out of your mind.”
Lip chuckled against my skin.
“Maybe.”
He mumbled.
“No, not maybe, definitely.”
His voice was remarkably crisp and clear. Lip was in his element. He was truly demonstrating his ability to woo any woman, even when his mind was under the influence of alcohol.
“Okay, I’m a little drunk.”
I couldn’t deny that he looked unbelievably sexy with his hot mouth trailing along my thighs.
“But I bet you’re already wet just thinking about me inside you.”
His tone was sultry.
How did he manage to flirt drunk better than I could flirt stone cold sober?
Smug bastard.
“I-“
I couldn't refute his accusation because he was completely correct. I could already feel the wetness pooling in my panties and all he had done was kiss my thighs.
“Come on Y/N, just let me fuck you.”
He pushed the hem of my shirt upwards, exposing a thin strip of my stomach. Lip’s fiery touch ignited an expanse of goosebumps along my soft skin.
He pressed several hot, open mouthed kisses to my lower abdomen.
I shuddered.
My knees began to shake.
Jesus.
I placed my hands on his shoulders and meekly pushed him away. Lip resisted, his mouth remaining pressed against my body.
“You’re so tense all the fuckin’ time.”
I gulped, squeezing my eyes shut. If I continued to maintain eye contact, I would never have the strength to put an end to this.
“You need to relax… and I can make you relax. I can eat you out and make you cum all over my face- I can fuck you real slow- make you feel really good-“
His warm mouth was hovering just above my waistband.
“Lip, we’re friends-“
“Friends fuck. Friends fuck all the time.”
He moved a hand forward, rubbing soft circles into my clothed clit.
Jesus, he was touching me through two layers of clothing and I was still getting insanely hot and bothered.
No.
Hell no.
“Sure, but sober friends don’t fuck drunk friends.”
I was more assertive in my actions. I pushed him away from me. Lip's mouth disconnected from my stomach with a soft pop. His hands landed in his lap.
“No?”
He asked with a sarcastic pout.
“Maybe another time.”
I said despite knowing Lip wouldn’t remember this tomorrow.
“Okay. But I got ya thinkin’ about it, didn’t I?”
He asked smugly.
“Yes, you did.”
Lip fell to one side, his head hitting the pillow.
“Will you stay with me?”
I chuckled.
“What are you, seven?”
Lip groaned, his eyes shut.
“No-I’m at least 10.”
Despite my jokes, I wanted to be with Lip. I'd possessed a small crush on him for the many years we'd been friends, but I wasn't sure if it was something I should pursue. It was always a minor nagging thought in the back of my mind, never something to take seriously.
Until tonight.
“Well, you’re not wrong.”
I crawled into bed with him, slinging an arm around his waist.
“Love ya Y/N.”
His voice was slurred to the point where his words could barely be understood. But I recognized what he was saying. When it was time to say goodbye, he always told me he loved me (platonically, of course). I'm grateful that drunk him still clung to our traditions.
“Love you too Lip.”
Lip smelled like stale tobacco and cheap alcohol. It wafted into my nose in waves, lulling me to sleep.
#fanfic#imagine#imagines#x yn#x you smut#x fem!reader#x y/n#x female reader#smut imagine#x reader#lip gallagher x you#lip gallagher fluff#lip gallagher x reader#lip gallagher fanfic#lip gallagher smut#shameless fanfiction#shameless fic#shameless#jeremy allen white x reader#jeremy allen white#lip gallagher gifs#lip gallagher imagine#lip gallagher one shot
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Blinded by Lust
Pairing: Chris Evans x Blind!Reader
Warnings: Cheating (on Chris' part), car accident
summary: Y/n feels it’s her fault her own boyfriend looks for an outlet elsewhere ‼️Major Angst‼️
(Sorry I hate writing angst, esp cheating it hurts😭)
- Requests are open!
Likes, Comments and Re-blogs are appreciated♥️
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(Y/n's P.O.V)
Chris was out with his friends tonight, leaving me to try and finish up the housework. After that car accident from a few months ago, I had lost vision in my left eye, and my left leg was still adjusting back to normal. I’m glad Chris was able to get out of the house after all the press he had been doing, things had been tense since he gotten home so i’m happy he’s enjoying himself out there.
Hearing the door slam shut, I limped over to the top of the staircase awaiting to see my boyfriend of 4 years. Only to see he wasn’t alone, nor was he in the right state of mind, neither of them were.
“O-oh” Is all I could make out of my mouth, watching as his hands dragged all over the random woman’s body, their mouths in a dirty battle.
Who could blame him though? I was half blind, couldn’t walk properly and as a result neglected his needs. Swallowing thickly I decided to just leave back to the guest room I was cleaning in, the sobs coming out once I closed door.
Hearing them stumble on the stairs into our shared bedroom I heard him complimenting her with shit like “sexy” calling her the names he used ro call me.
Within minutes I heard the headboard banging against the wall, the sounds of their echoed moans bouncing between the walls, my sobs now stifling to sniffles.
I felt numb. Unloved. Worthless. Helpless.
“God I missed this, you feel so fucking good” O heard him shout all of a sudden, before silence ensued. Minutes went by, until the woman said something,
“That’ll be 200 dollars baby” Her sultry voice said, her heels clicking out in the hallway, the whole situation felt like it had lasted seconds when it reality was about an hour or two. Absolute hell.
“U-uh alright, can we uh, keep this secret” I heard him by the door, his voice now sounding worried.
“Mhm customer confidentiality”
Seconds went by, the front door had opened and closed, Chris now heading back into the bedroom clearly still drunk as I heard things being knocked over.
*Brrr*
My phone started ringing loudly on the guest room table, sitting weakly on the floor I felt numbness overcome my whole body. Hearing hid heavy footfalls approaching the room and pushing the door open; my arms going around to hug myself for support.
“B-babe”
“You don’t get to call me that Chris” He winced, his name coming out harshly, my sadness now turning into complete anger.
“Did you hear all that?”
“Did I fucking hear all that? I fucking saw the start of it too. Seems like you were enjoyin yourself enough anyway, good for you Chris”
I snarked back, trying to stand up when he came over to try and help me up before I pushed him off.
“Don’t touch me”
“It was a mistake, I was drunk and i’m still drunk”
“Well your mistake is fucking shitty, I hope the quick fuck was worth it” Grabbing my phone from the table I attempted to leave the room, his towering stature blocking my way out and holding me by the arms.
“Don’t do this babe, I-I really didn’t mean it. I regretted it straight after I swear. I love you, only you”
“Not enough to keep your dick in your pants clearly” I whispered, my throat closing up again, stopping myself from looking up at him. “I hate that I did this to you, hit me, scream at me, do something”
“No. I’m better than that. Better than you, I don’t need revenge to feel better”
“S-so what’s your plan”
“What any conscious person would do, I’m leaving”
“Wait no, can’t we work past this or something?”
“No we’re clearly not as compatible as we thought we were Chris. This is it over. I can’t bear it. It’s not fair on you or me” Walking successfully past him, I took off the promise ring he had given me and put it into the palm of his hand, he didn’t even try to stop me leaving.
——
Taglist Tags (Form for taglist is up there ^^) : @pandaxnienke @patzammit @seren-a-ity @thereisa8ella @mrspeacem1nusone
#romance#chris evans imagine#chris evans x reader#chris evans fanfiction#chris evans#chris evans oneshot
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My collage roommate (part 2)
!!YJW!!
Summary:u entered collage everything was going amazing u had your bsf with u but there was one problem ur collage roommate… (also there is a plot twist about heeseung and jungwon there not as close as u think)
Warnings:cursing kissing (WILL EVENTUALLY BE A SMUT IN THE NEXT CHAPTER JUST GIVE ME SOME TIME -also tell me if I missed any this
RECAP:
“Yeah that’s right just walk away that’s why yuji never wanted to be with just walk away from all your problems that’s probly why she wouldn’t even have sex with u!”
He stoped and let go of your hand and the next thing u know he’s punching heeseung
OMG JUNGWON
//BACK TO SCENE \\
“OMG JUNGWON!!”
You were completely shocked not knowing what to do but people obviously heard you screaming so people started to gather around but Jake and sunoo pushed thrue the crowd to see
“YO wtf are you guys doing “
Jake tried to pull jungwon off of heeseung after they both got each others punched jungwon wouldn’t stop pushing jake to the ground and leaving everyone shocked screaming yelling recording egging it on
“STOP SUNOO SUNGHOON DO DOMETHING”
At this point sunoo had gotten upset cause it was his party they decided to fight at jake was pissed everything was going wrong here sunoo grabbed jungwon and pushed him off sunghoon and Jake grabbing heeseung
“WTH DO YOU GUYS THINK YOUR DOOING “
“Maybe ask jungwon hes being a little bitch”
“Call me a bitch agian I just kicked your ass!!”
“Oh y-
“STOP IT I don’t know why tf you guys are fighting but I wanna go home you guys can be pricks later “
“Jake can you please take me home “
“Uh Sure”
“Wait y/n I was gonna take u-
“You’ve done enough for tonight you two should stay and help sunoo clean up you guys fucked up his party “
Jake took you to his car everyone eles left the comotion im almost positive heeseung went home pissed off sunoo obviously upset at the boys but wasn’t to upset cause the night still continued after you were in jakes car silent until he spoke to you
“Y/n”
You turned your head to face him
“You know whatever they said back there don’t pay attention to it”
“Yk I was trying to but everything was so outta pocket it’s messing with me “
“Ik you and jungwon just barley are getting to know eachother but he really dose like you “
“Can I ask you somthing “
Jake nodded as a response
“Who’s yuji and why did she break up with jungwon”
“Ah I really shouldn’t be the one to tell you this “
“Please jake”
“Ugh Fine Yuji we’ll she was um something she cheated on jungwon a lot and jungwon was done with it after he found out heeseung and her got drunk and accidentally slept Together “
“What that’s crazy heeseung dosent seem like that type of guy”
“Weel he was drunk but that’s what happened and after they broke up she spread lies cause she didn’t want people to know she was a cheater so she said things like Jungwons bad in bed he’s a virgin things like that”
“Damn I thought you guys were all best freinds he even said so himself “
“Well he’s not the type of person to hold a grudge so he forgave him but heeseung can be an ass about it sometimes “
“Ah I see “
The whole car ride to your dorm was more quiet after that convo you guys had you had no idea that happened to jungwon and well that girl you saw I Gusse he really did have a reason to be angry at her you were more confused as to why heeseung felt the need to be an ass still if jungwon had already forgave him maybe he was the one still caught up?
//when jungwon got home\\
You wanted to stay up and ask jungwon what happend so as soon as you heard him open the door to the dorm u marched to him just as he was walking thrue the hallway part to take his shoes off
“Wth was that yang”
“What’s it to you “
“Idk maybe the fact my name was brought up so many times”
“So many times are you talking about how heeseung said I wanted to fuck you “
“I-
“If that what you thought I’m sorry but I’m just tryna make sure your not a pon in his game “
“I can take care of myself if your so worried and what if I did huh What’s It To YOU”
“Yk what I couldn’t give a fuck less what you do”
You just nodded at him and picked at your lip and grabed you phone and wallet and a jacket and put on your shoes as fast as you could
“What are u Doing “
“Dw about it you couldn’t give a fuck less what I do right “
He grabbed your wrist getting you to stay you looked at him and threw your hand off of him
“Scince you couldn’t give a fuck less I’m going to heeseung s Place “
He pushed u back inside locked the door and pinned you to the wall
“What makes you think your going over there princess”
……….
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TW
1. was he abusive originally?
No, he was not. We would yell at each other, and he might throw things and call me names, but never got physically abusive. I smashed a Frappuccino in his face and abandoned him at gas stations or his friends house when he was a jerk.
2. What was the attraction?
He was tall and good looking and very funny and charismatic. He always had the fastest cars, and would buy me whatever I wanted. He owned a successful business, but I found out he was a drug dealer as well, later in the relationship. He was very persistent with me and wouldn’t give up. He was known for being a player, but he seemed to be obsessed with me and would tell anyone that’d listen he was gonna marry me someday. Lots of chicks were jealous, and I was immature so I felt special.
3. How did you shoot? What he do?
I shot him with a pump action shot gun, one time in the left shoulder with bird shot. It took most of his shoulder off and there was a piece of him on the stairs that looked like hamburger meat kind of. He screamed and ran around and said his little speech before lying down and bleeding out.
4. Police?
I had called the police and put it on speaker so he could hear it in an effort to get him to leave. When he still came at me, I picked up the gun and pointed it at him. He said “if you don’t put down that gun, I’m going to beat you to death with it.” The police operator said, I had the right to protect myself if he attacks me. He attacked me and I shot him. The police arrived in like 2 minutes after I shot him and the ambulance was like 1 minute later. They had me go put the gun in the gun safe, after I shot him. I thought it was an odd thing to tell me to do, but I learned death by cop, is very common in these situations where people point the gun at police and get shot
5. His car and cops cars?
He was in a large Chevy suv and they were in ford explorers
6. Baby mamas? Family?
His oldest son and his mom contacted me. I gave him the truck that he had driven to my house since the police didn’t take it or care what happened to it. His other baby mama never contacted me, but her parents did to thank me for putting him down and told me how he’d beaten her up before they broke up, and beat up her dad too
His dad called me and apologized for his sons actions. His sister called and screamed at me. His mother was the fucking coroner so I thought I was going to jail for sure but she never called me
Thank u for being so kind to reply to the anon's questions. I really hope that talking about it helps u in the best way possible 💛!
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Skwistok short story:
Summary: kinda fucked up one shot about Toki beating up Skwisgaar after an argument but Skwisgaar likes it.
Rating: Mature
TW: violence, sexual mentions, PTSD, blood, age regression and past trauma/abuse
(Also I do not sexualize age regression and I myself have it as a coping mechanism. The mentions in this story are brief, but implied that Toki is age regressing on and off due to flashbacks and isn’t sure how to handle his adult feelings as they come and go and overall he just wants comfort).
“Skwisgaar?”
There was a knock at his closed bedroom door and then it was pushed open before Skwisgaar could even answer. Skwisgaar sighed at hearing Toki’s voice. Toki was always barging into his room unwelcome, and it was one of Skwisgaar’s biggest pet peeves. All of the guys did it, but Toki was the most frequent. He valued his space and solitude that Toki was always infringing on.
Toki stood in the doorway, hugging his deddybear in one arm, rubbing his eyes tiredly. He headed towards the bed, where Skwisgaar was sitting hunched over, fiddling with his guitar, because what else is there to do at midnight? Sleep? Fuck that.
“Cans I comes into yous room?” Toki asked, sitting on the foot of the bed.
Skwisgaar wasn’t even phased by this anymore because Toki never waited for the okay to come in.
“Oh ja, makes yous’selfs at homes I guess, whys not just moves in at this point, ehh? Since yous ams alreadys t’inks this ams you’s room too.” Skwisgaar huffed, sarcastically, squinting his eyes at Toki as in irritation.
Toki lacked the ability to understand sarcasm most times and his eyes widened in surprise, “oh, wowee, so I’s can sleeps in here now?”
Skwisgaar flicked an eyebrow up, crossing his arms, “no, Tokis! You’s ams snores too loud and punches me in yous sleep! And dats ams…kind of gay for you’s to sleeps with me.”
Toki frowned, hugging his deddybear tighter to his chest, watching intently as Skwisgaar strummed his guitar. “But you’s said I moves in!”
“I ams being sar-caskics, Toki! You’s ams such an idiots! You nevers understands de perfactly clear anglish I says to you.”
Toki looked like he might sock Skwisgaar in the mouth or start crying but Skwisgaar just stared at him, pausing his guitar session for a split second before turning his attention back to plucking the strings.
“But I has a nightmares!”
“Bigs deals! You ams making mes lives nightmares right now and I’s not even asleep!!”
“Please, Skwisgaar! I nots asks you for anything else ever again, please!”
Toki’s tendency to raise his voice and whine the more distressed he became was also another one of Skwisgaar’s pet peeves, he needed to make a list of them. They were both such polar opposites when it came down to it and it was to some a mystery how they were such close friends.
“Eugh! Fines! Just shuts you’s mouths already!
Toki instantly stopped screaming and went back to watching Skwisgaar play the guitar. He was always pleased with himself when his tantrums got him what he wanted. They didn’t always work on Skwisgaar but when they did, he felt a sense of power. Toki waited a few minutes before jumping up from the bed, ignoring the irritated glare from the older man.
“I be’s right back, don’t’s goes to sleep!” Toki pleaded, and the blond just rolled his eyes.
“Ugh, nots likes I cans now, you ams gives me what’s am called a migraine.”
Toki smiled and left the room. Skwisgaar prayed to the gods that Toki would get distracted and not return so he could keep practicing guitar, but within seconds he was back again, with an armful of stuffed animals and the blue comforter from his bed.
“What ams all this shit you brings into mines room, Toki?”
“I cants leaves dem in mines room they ams scared!”
“They ams not evens real…”
Toki scowled and dumped the pile of stuffed animals onto Skwisgaar’s bed, then climbed in beside them.
“Yes they is real and theys gonna sleeps with us.”
Skwisgaar frowned. “Dat ams so gay.”
“No it’s not! This ams metal!”
Skwisgaar couldn’t hold in his laughter, and it only seemed to make Toki angrier. Before he knew it, Skwisgaar was on the floor and in a daze as Toki glared down at him, deddy bear in hand.
“Toki dids you reallys just hits me with that stupid toys for babies?”
“Stops makings fun of me I hates when you does this!”
Skwisgaar rolled his eyes again, “I stops makings fun of you when yous stops beings a baby.”
Again Skwisgaar found himself being whacked in the face, fucking backhanded by the younger man, and it knocked him back down, flat on his back like a little bitch. It was alarming how quickly Toki could go from sweet and calm to a raging beast. Skwisgaar was usually never too phased by this either, he could handle himself and usually had the upper hand, being taller and older, the one in control; taunting Toki and making him angrier, reveling in the power he felt whenever he could get on Toki’s nerves. Toki was so easy going that sometimes Skwisgaar enjoyed seeing the younger man explode in anger or frustration while at the mercy of his hands. But this time was different and though Toki’s face was hot and red and he was breathing hard and heavy through gritted teeth, something in his eyes didn’t match his actions. It made Skwisgaar feel…bad. Fuck. He never felt guilty for being a dick before.
“Tokis…” Skwisgaar began, but Toki just shoved him when the blond tried to regain a sitting position.
“No! Fucks you! You always makes fun of me and calls me names and I’s sick of it! I thoughts we’s friends what’s cares about each other!”
Usually Skwisgaar would smirk or say ‘so what’s?’ but underneath the surface of anger, there was hurt and Toki almost looked close to tears the way he was contorting his face and clenching his jaw. Before either of them knew it, Toki was on top of the older man, hands around his throat like he wanted to squeeze the life out of him. He could if he wanted to. Killing Skwisgaar would be like snapping a twig. Toki kept his hands clasped firmly, hearing the other struggle to breathe as the air was choked out of him, and it made Toki want to keep squeezing Skwisgaar’s wind pipe until the man was almost dead. There was something so satisfying to Toki about seeing the famous lead guitarist try to fight and claw his way out of his grip, being in complete control for once. Having this much power where he was usually so powerless. The strained whimpering noises coming from the blond only made Toki want to slam Skwisgaar’s head against the floor to show him who’s boss, and maybe he wanted to make Skwisgaar cry, because everyone always made Toki cry and he was so fed up with being treated like dumb kid, but honestly he still felt like one: a clueless useless kid no one loved. Toki wanted to hurt the other man for making him feel this way. Break his bones and make him feel ashamed. Make him feel less than shit. He wished he hated him so he could destroy him. But Toki couldn’t do it, he wasn’t that evil, just feeling betrayed and belittled, having a flashback, he soon realized, of a time he was tortured by his father. Maybe he didn’t feel this rage towards Skwisgaar, and was just taking it out on him.
When Toki felt Skwisgaar’s body begin to go limp, he released his hands from around his throat and tossed him on his back, but spit in his face for one final act of disrespect.
The two of them laid beside each other, panting and in shock, Skwisgaar more so than Toki; the blond was lucky to be alive and survive with only some bruises and bloody nose. He felt sick from the adrenaline rush, and sexually aroused. He wasn’t one who liked to be dominated, especially by Toki, but he was hard. His boner was only a short lived distraction from the pain he was in after being thrown around. Toki probably wasn’t aware of Skwisgaar’s weird kinks like being choked until passing out, so Skwisgaar just kept quiet for a few more minutes, wiping blood and saliva from his face, lying perfectly still as to not set Toki off again.
Why the fuck did he like that? And why the fuck was he hoping Toki would beat him up again? Skwisgaar wasn’t sure what to think or say but then he noticed Toki sitting up, grabbing for his bear again and clinging to it like a life preserver.
“Ams you crying?” Skwisgaar asked, trying to say this is as delicately as possible and not like a dick, but he’s too blunt for his own good.
“No’s! Ams not crying just sits here…”
“Uh…Ja, Tokis, that ams crying, what’s whens de tears in yours eye.”
“Shuts up!”
Skwisgaar tried to tell Toki to shut up, but gasped instead, his hand flying up to hold his face and rub at the stinging sensation on his cheek. He looked just as surprised and taken aback as Toki did after slapping him. The red mark on Skwisgaar’s cheek looked painful to the touch and Toki couldn’t express any of his frustration or feelings at the moment. He was so angry and so hurt, why did Skwisgaar always say mean things to him? Why was he so cold to him some days and others was so fond of him? Why did he love Skwisgaar despite all of this? It was so fucking gross and too overwhelming and it didn’t make any sense.
Toki set his bear down and yanked Skwisgaar into a rough and messy kiss, their spit and Skwisgaar’s blood making for a sloppy and painful make out session, Skwisgaar wincing and moaning in discomfort whenever his nose was bumped or his face was touched. It only bled worse the more Toki kissed him, but the blood didn’t bother him and he just wanted Skwisgaar to know he was sorry. Toki hated that he couldn’t control his temper but it was more than just that. He didn’t know how to deal with his childhood. It always followed him wherever he went, hovering like a dark cloud in the background of every situation and conversation he was a part of. No one else really understood it either. Toki did recognize, after he began to recollect his thoughts, that maybe it was triggering to him whenever people, even if they claimed to be joking, made fun of him or mocked him, pushed his buttons purposefully, didn’t respect him. Anytime it happened he was a little kid again being abused and verbally degraded. He lost all control in those moments and now Skwisgaar’s face and neck were bruised and bloodied and Toki frowned in shame. Being the stronger of the two, Toki pulled Skwisgaar closer to him, both now laying on the hard floor of the bedroom, neither saying a word. The brunette mumbled an apology, kissing the back of Skwisgaar’s head and his bruised neck as he held him, his deddybear somehow making its way back into Toki’s arms, wedged in between with Skwisgaar.
“dette er så homofil, Toki…”
“faen deg, Skwisgaar…you’s gay…”
Skwisgaar chuckled quietly, turning onto his side to face Toki, wincing from the beating he’d just received but dismissed it.
“…maybes…but onlys for you.”
Toki cocked his head to the side slightly, searching for any signs Skwisgaar was fucking with him to get revenge for nearly snapping his neck moments earlier, but there was only sincerity in the other man’s eyes, and Toki could feel his own welling up with tears again just from the way Skwisgaar was looking at him. He’d never looked at him like this before. Like he loved him.
“Skwis…ams…”
“Shh. I knows Toki. I knows.”
Skwisgaar wrapped an arm around the younger man, helping him to sit up, leaning him against the bed.
“You knows…if you’s wants to sleeps in here tonight’s…or any other nights…I maybes don’t mind…just keeps the punchings and beatings to a minimums, ja?”
Toki sniffled, nodding, shamefully peering up from where he sat on the floor, curled up in a ball with his deddybear. So helpless and exhausted, feeling lost in his own body and mind. He felt too young to be this fucked up.
“I would likes that…Ja, I promiskes no more beatings you up…”
Skwisgaar helped the younger man into bed, grabbing a tissue for his nose bleed, hoping it wasn’t broken because fuck, he liked his nose, and sat down beside Toki, who was already snuggling into the warmth of the comforter.
“And Tokis…”
“Ja..?”
“I didn’t says you cants chokes me or beats me, just…nots all de time, heuh?”
For once Toki felt he understood what Skwisgaar was hinting at, and it made him feel only slightly less terrible for losing his temper like that. He and Skwisgaar fought all the time, he’d just never beat him up like this before. It felt wrong and what if it made him just like his dad? His dad beat him up all the time. Toki hoped it didn’t mean he was like his dad… He needed to sleep.
“Gets some rest, huh? You needs it for tomorrows when you does you’s crappy guitars playing.”
“Oh fucks you my playing ams good!”
“Ah…we cans debates about dat…laters…”
Skwisgaar was too exhausted to argue and really didn’t think his body could withstand being a punching bag again, even though it did get him horny, but he wasn’t saying that a second time tonight.
Instead of insulting him further, Skwisgaar took it as his chance to regain some dominance and pulled the younger to his chest, letting him rest his head there while he tried to get comfortable. This was too gay for words so Skwisgaar wasn’t going to say anything, and tomorrow they’d probably both pretend this hadn’t happened. Or maybe they wouldn’t. Who knows. But it felt good to be together and the empty lonely feeling that Skwisgaar usually felt at this time of night was gone and he was at peace with himself and with Toki in his arms.
“I hates you Skwisgaar…”
“Ja. I hates you too, Toki.”
#toki wartooth#skwisgaar skwigelf#dethklok#metalocalypse#skwistok#angst and feels#angst with a happy ending#writing dump#Skwistok fic#dethklok fanfic#ptsd#childhood trauma#tw#fanfic#my fic#our Toki alter influences these fics#sorry not sorry#osdd fictive
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yo if your comfortable can I request headcannons/ scenario (whatever is easier for you to write) about one piece boys (zoro law and sanji) would react to y/n using their safeword. Like how they would calm them down and aftercare. Ty💕
after care headcanons
Featuring: Zoro, Law, and Sanji
post type: headcanons
bear note: when I saw this I was blushing hard as a tomate. like AHAHHAHAHAHEHEHEBE! I was squealing! This made my night. So I got you :) im going to link @spideyyeet they made an amazing masterpiece. About using a safe word! I love it! Go check it out! I read that shit back to back!! I still read that shit back to back
@3strapstyle helped me with this one so THANK YOU RUMMIEEE
Zoro
- first off! this man don’t know what after care is unless you tell him
-“STOP ZORO THAT FUCKING HURTS!” You’ll scream the minute he pounds you from behind
- zoro loves anal so I can imagine him being rough with his fat dick in u making u say the safe word
-“GREEN!”
- once you tell him he starts to feel so bad.
-“My bad babe.” he stops now, feeling awkward
-you have to tell him what to do. He’s a slow boy (not too slow though)
-“okay so now what.”
-“do you want to be alone?.”
-“no. I want you to hold me.” you’ll pout at him and look away,
- He’ll let you cuddle on his chest, and kiss you gently,
-“did I go too rough on you.”
-“way too rough, my butt hurts” you’ll sigh
-after a few minutes of cuddling he’ll give you a proper apology “I’m sorry…I’ll try my best to not get too carried away.”
-than try to rub your ass to make it “feel better.”
Law
-this man is into s&m
-he wants to call u all sorts of names, spit in ur mouth, mark u up
- loves IT ROUGH AND MESSY
-“purple!!” If You’ve been too overstimulated, or lost conscious. He’ll understand what you’re trying to say and will ask
-“do you want to stop or take a break?”
- regardless when u say the safe word he stops instantly
-can make you overstimulated within 45 seconds (it’s because his size he’s long and thick)
- “I’m sorry baby, does it hurt right here?” He’ll try to figure it out where it hurts and massage your sore spots
-“you did amazing baby, I’m so sorry for going too rough on you” he’s doing his job as a doctor and as your partner to praise how amazing you are, treat you well
-will immediately give you pain killers, and make you something to eat.
-draws you a bath to help with sore muscles. very sweet of him
- literally does whatever you want
-"don't worry about me not cumming. ill consider this my punishment. I like to edge myself anyway"
-spoils you and of course will give you a snack, y’all will probably just stay in y’all’s shared room, and go to sleep
Sanji
> tears were starting to flow through your eyes. all it was blurry… “blue!!” you screamed out crying, unintentionally hitting his shoulder a few times.
> Sanji immediately stoppped and hugged you.. “shhh…it’s okay..honey... im..sorry…did I go too far on you…” He’s wiping your tears.
>If You were too overstimulated to explain yourself, he’ll be holding you and continued comforting you until your breathing was back to normal.
> When you had enough energy to talk about why you stopped him, you’ll explain to him on why you just wanted to please him since he always pleases you. you thought you were going to return the favor and it’s okay.
> Yes giving both partners the same amount of pleasure is needed, but communication is most necessary, that’s what Sanji was trying to tell you.
“Darling look at me. You’re okay.. im glad you told me. if we kept going..you could’ve been jelly on toast.”
- kissing the top of your head, before taking another hit of his cigarette. you giggled a bit which indeed made you feel a bit better. rubbing your back, and tracing your stretch marks, holding your hands. Kissing you everywhere. He just is an aftercare king.
“Let me to draw you a bath, and hold you okay..a princess like you should be treated with the best care as possible.” he carried you in bridal style into the bath. he washed your hair, you body and everything.
> MANS EVEN DID YOUR HAIR ROUTINE FOR YOU!! OMFG! So you didn’t have to do it.
“You use this one right princess?”
- He was so gentle and kind with you.
> The way applied the oil in your hair, scrunched your curls,and gently brushed your hair kissing your hands.
> You instructed him step by step on what to do and he does it flawlessly. 😩❤️
> when it came to you getting hungry, he made you your food from childhood. admiring how you’d eat it.
Whether it was something small or something big to fill you up. it’d be something to help soothe you. Because sanji loves you and will do anything to please the love of his life.
#one piece imagines#one piece x reader#law x y/n#law x reader#sanji x reader#zoro x reader#one piece x afab reader#sanji x fem reader#pirate hunter zoro#sanji fluff#trafalgardwaterlaw#trafalgar d law x reader
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I’m not safe
Here’s a full recount of the events that happened earlier after I got home that led me to cry for somewhere around 15-30 minutes
1. My mother comes into the living room, where I’m watching a YouTube video on my phone, headphones in
2. She tries to play with me (she was bullying me)
3. She yanks my earbud out of my ear then runs off (I should remind u she’s like 51-ish)
4. I go to look for her
5. I find her in the kitchen a minute or two later
6. I tell her to give me my earbud back
7. She takes it OUT OF HER FUCKING EAR! AND HANDS IT TO ME!
8. I find my drink under the living room table
9. I can’t find my phone (seconds after the drink)
10. I go back to her, telling her to give me my phone back
11. She runs off
12. I chase her, and grab the back of her shirt to keep a hold of her
13. I let go for two (2) seconds
14. She tries to run off again
15. I chase after and grab her shirt again
16. I get my phone back
17. I look for my headphone case
18. I go to the kitchen to tell her to give it back
19. She tries to gaslight me
20. I tell her, multiple times, to give it back
21. She goes to the bathroom
22. I go to the living room
23. She comes in, headphone case in her hand
24. I tell her to give it to me
25. She says no
26. I walk up to her, getting in her face (as close as I can bc I’m shorter than her)
27. She puts her other hand up, and I push it down
28. She slaps my hand
29. This repeats x2 more times
30. I have to give her a hug to get my headphone case back
31. I do it, and i get my headphone case
32. She thinks it’s funny to squish me and I try to twist away bc she’s choking me
33. I sit down after she leaves the living room, calling my best friend
34. I start talking to her
35. My mom says “awww, are you tattling on me to my mommy?” (Mocking me, bc that’s who I used to call before I learned she couldn’t keep her mouth shut)
36. I tell her I’m taking to my bestie (I’ll call her Madison for this)
37. (Remember I’ve got my earbuds in, on a call w/ Madison)
38. My mom starts going ballistic, accusing me of hiding her phones (1 personal, 1 work)
39. I tell her I didn't
40. We go back and forth before I mute myself on the call bc I’m starting to cry bc that’s what happens when I’m angry, and I hate it
41. She starts going through my backpack, and I tell Madison I’ll call her right back before hanging up
42. My moms screaming at me, saying that I hid her phones bc she took my stuff
43. (Spoiler! I didnt!)
44. Guess where they were?
45. Guess
46.
47. WOW!
48. They were right behind her, not even 10 feet from where she remembered putting them!
49. I DIDNT EVEN KNOW WHERE THEY WERE
50. SO IM LIKE
51. “WOW! THERE THEY ARE!”
52. (She found them before I saw them btw)
53. She’s mad at me, I’m angry and crying
54. I tell her that she’s bullying me, her LITERAL CHILD!
55. Her response?
56. Somewhat along the lines of
57. “If you think I’m bullying you, you’ve got a fucked up sense of reality”
58. And she’s cursing me out (all while I’m still crying)
59. I tell her she’s being a jerk
60. She flips me off and leaves the kitchen, where we had gravitated, which is where her phones and my backpack were
61. She goes outside, I get my food out the oven
62. I call Madison back
63. And I’m talking to her, still upset, crying, and interrupted every few seconds as I sniffle and take a breath and try to catch my breath and cry
64. I’m barely forming coherent sentences bc of all this
65. I talk to my bestie, Madison, while I try to eat
66. I find out my food wasn’t even cooked all the way thru
67. So I’m sat there, from 4:46 to 5:12 (24 minutes) talking to her
68. I eventually move to my room after throwing the food away bc I’d lost my appetite
69. I continue the rest of the call (I don’t know how long I was in there)
70. (Dining room portions of the call + my bedroom part of the call = 24 ish minutes)
71. While I’m still on the phone w/ Madison, I look up my therapist’s office
72. I hang up soon after, and start typing this on notes so I have an easily accessible copy for Tuesday, when I go to my therapy appointment (that’s where I am rn)
73. I’m going to copy and paste this then publish
74. I’m then going to try to get in contact with my therapist (going into the future now)
75. Please wish me luck, I don’t feel safe here
76. These events are getting more often, leading me to calling Madison in tears more often)
#i’m not kidding#i’m not even joking#i’m not okay#i’m not ok rn#i’m scared#I’m scared for my life rn#I’m not safe
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Love Somebody Like You (2/5)
Jon wanted to ask Martin out for months, but after too many dates that ended the exact moment he came out, he hasn’t managed to scrape together the courage just yet. Meanwhile, Martin desperately wants to ask Jon on a date as well, but he isn’t quite sure what to make of all the mixed signals Jon sends his way. And then there’s Jon’s flatmate Tim, who accidentally finds himself in the middle of all this after meeting Martin on a night out…
In the end, it might just take a supernatural encounter and a desperate rescue mission to sort out all this mess.
Jon/Martin with a good dash of Jon&Tim friendship, rated T, ~2500 words for this chapter. Read on AO3!
Fuck.
Martin just barely resists the urge to scream as soon as Jon turns on his heels and practically runs out of the library. He does not, however, resist the urge to collapse onto the desk and bury his face in his hands.
That’s how Basira finds him just a moment later. Martin can feel her gaze on him even before she speaks up, boring into the back of his skull.
“You okay?” she finally asks, a bit reluctantly. Martin pushes himself upright with a long sigh.
“Just great,” he spits out, with more venom than intended. Basira only raises a sceptical eyebrow at him, with no other emotion flashing across her face. No pity, no judgement, and somehow that is enough to break Martin.
“Jon was here a moment ago,” he blurts out before he can stop himself. “And I made an idiot of myself.”
“Somehow I doubt that.”
“I did. I- I asked him out. And he said no.”
At that, Basira’s other eyebrow shoots up. “Really? I thought he was all over you.”
Heat rushes to Martin’s cheeks. “I’m, well, he- he didn’t say no per se, but just… stared at me in horror and then said he couldn’t. And-”
Martin bites his tongue before the next part slips out. And when I touched him earlier he froze, and his heart was racing, as if in… panic, maybe? Basira doesn’t need to know that part. Martin isn’t sure he would survive the humiliation.
“And… that’s basically a ‘no, not interested’, I suppose,” Martin finishes, sounding utterly miserable.
Basira lets out a long sigh that probably means something like ‘I’m not getting paid enough to deal with the pining of my coworkers’. “Right,” she says, a determined look entering her eyes. “Grab your stuff, we’re closing early and going for a drink.”
“I- what?”
Basira shrugs. “Looks like you need it. No one comes to the library at this time of the day anyway. Except for Jon, apparently.”
Martin hesitates for a moment, but then he nods. At least he won’t have to be alone with his thoughts. “Okay. Let’s go.”
~~~
Drinks with Basira is… fine. They very carefully don’t talk about anything personal or - God forbid - emotional, and instead make smalltalk over the books they’ve read recently and argue over the new filing system they’re implementing in the library. It surely isn’t Martin’s favourite way to spend an evening, but it’s a welcome distraction. It ends abruptly around ten when Basira gets a call from someone and has to leave, while Martin stays a little longer to finish his last beer.
Unfortunately, that is enough for his thoughts to return to Jon. Martin runs a hand down his face with a groan. For just a moment, after Jon asked him to join on the trip to Kent, Martin had been so sure he was interested. That he’d say yes to a date in a heartbeat. Christ, he asked Martin to share his hotel room, and then he still turned him down. Martin isn’t sure the signals could be any more mixed. But maybe he finally has to admit to himself that Jon sees nothing but a working relationship between them.
“Hey,” someone suddenly says beside him, and Martin looks up to find a man smiling down at him. He’s handsome - dark hair that flops down his forehead, broad shoulders in a patterned button-up, a blinding smile. And, Martin notices with a hitch of his breath, a bi pride pin stuck to his collar.
“Um. H-hi,” he manages to get out.
“I’ve got a drink for you if you want it,” the man says, holding up two glasses filled with a pink cocktail. It matches the bright purple of his nails. “But no pressure if you’d rather be left alone.”
Martin blinks. He’s not used to getting hit on like this, and he suddenly doesn't quite know what to do with it. “Um. Uh- no, I’d like some company,” he finally stutters, and the man’s grin widens.
“Great,” he says as he sits down, sliding a glass over to Martin. “I’m Tim.”
“Martin.”
Tim tilts his head. “Martin, huh? You’re not a researcher by any chance, are you?”
“Uh, no. I work in a library. Why?”
“Oh, my flatmate works in research and talks about a coworker called Martin a lot. Would’ve been a funny coincidence.”
Martin hesitates for a second. Does Jon have a flatmate? He actually doesn’t know. But he isn’t sure why Jon would talk about him outside of work. “Uh, it’s a common name, I guess?” Martin finally says with a chuckle.
“Sure is.” Tim grins, and launches into a story about the Martin at his office who, after two months of increasingly confusing conversations, turned out to be two separate people with the same name.
Over the next hour, Martin learns that Tim is smart and funny and - most importantly - genuinely interested in what Martin has to say. It makes him easy to talk to. It makes Martin, when Tim starts flirting with him, with an easy smile on his lips and a sparkle in his eyes, actually flirt back. They’re just about to order a second drink when Tim suddenly bites his lip, looking a little bit shy for the first time that night, and lays a hand over Martin’s. His skin is warm where they touch.
“Do you want to come home with me?” Tim asks, and Martin nearly chokes on the last sip of his drink.
He takes a moment to catch his breath. With the way Tim looks at him, it’s clear even to Martin what he’s implying. Right, he thinks, feeling a bit lightheaded. People do that sort of thing. Pick someone up from a bar to take them to bed. Sometimes he forgets.
“Uh-” Martin starts dumbly.
Tim lets out a nervous laugh and pulls his hand away. “Sorry, was that too forward?”
“Um, no, it’s just…” Martin takes a breath and grimaces. “Sorry. I’m just… really badly in love with my coworker.”
“Oh!” Tim’s eyebrows shoot up. “Okay.”
Martin groans and runs a hand down his face. “We’re not- I mean, we’re not together, and I really don’t think he likes me like that, but, um… that’s not fair to you, is it?”
Tim shrugs. “I mean, I'm up for casual. No strings attached. It’s just sex, so I really don’t mind if you’re into someone else.”
Martin’s breath catches in his throat. He’s never really tried casual sex. He likes sex, sure, but it’s not something that crosses his mind all too often. It just never came up when he wasn’t in a relationship. But he likes Tim. And the thought of being wanted like this, of spending the night in someone else’s arms, of getting to touch them and being touched in return, nearly brings tears to his eyes.
“Okay,” Martin blurts out. What else can he say, lonely and touch-starved as he is?
Tim smiles, but still looks a little doubtful. “Are you sure?” he asks softly. “We can just get another drink if you’d prefer?”
Martin reaches for Tim’s hand, entangling their fingers. “I’m sure,” he says, voice surprisingly steady.
Tim’s smile splits into a grin. “Okay. Okay, great.”
~~~
Half an hour later, Martin lets Tim push him down onto his bed. As soon as he’s lying down Tim is on top of him, knees on either side of his hips. Martin links his hand behind Tim’s neck to pull him down for another kiss, and Tim eagerly sinks into it.
He gets lost in the sensations for a while, the glorious heat and pressure and softness of it all. Tim’s lips warm against his own, his body firm above him, a hand slipping beneath his shirt, caressing and exploring. Martin’s head swims as he kisses back, tugs Tim a little closer, runs a hand down Tim’s back that’s making him shiver in Martin’s arms.
It’s nice. It’s more than that, even. It’s dizzying and exciting and comforting all at once. And yet.
As Tim whimpers against Martin’s lips, he can’t help but wonder if Jon would make a similar sound. If he would enjoy the nip of teeth and the rake of fingernails down his back as well, or if he would prefer a gentler approach. Soft kisses against his cheek, gentle fingertips caressing the back of his neck, quiet whispers of adoration until he’s melting in Martin’s arms. He would look so lovely like this, cheeks flushed and hair spread out on Martin’s pillow and-
Tim lets out a moan above him, and the sound roughly pulls Martin out of his fantasy. Shame burns through him, dread settling in his stomach cold as ice, and he lets out a distressed sound from the back of his throat. Tim immediately pushes himself upright, looking down at him in concern.
Martin rolls to the side to put some distance between them and buries his face in his hands. “Sorry. I’m sorry. I can’t do this.”
“Hey, it’s alright,” Tim says. “I’m sorry. Did I do something wrong?”
“No, no, it’s just… it’s just me. I’m sorry.”
Tim shifts beside him, sheets rustling, and when Martin chances a peak between his fingers he’s sitting with his back against the headboard, looking down at him with a furrow between his brows. “Don’t apologise. You’re allowed to change your mind.”
Martin lets out a shuddering breath. He pushes himself upright as well and sits beside Tim, wrapping his arms around his knees. “It’s just- I can’t stop thinking about…”
“Your coworker?” Tim asks gently.
“Yeah. And- I know you said you don’t mind if I’m into someone else, but I just… I can’t do this while thinking about someone else. That just feels awful.”
For some reason, Tim still doesn’t look upset, even though his hair is still mused and his lips are still shining and red. He just smiles, and says, “He must be a pretty great guy.”
Martin can’t help but smile back. “He is.”
“Do you want to talk about him?”
“I- no.” Martin groans and runs a hand down his face. “God, Tim, I already feel like such a dick for bringing this up while I’m in your bed.”
Tim laughs. “It’s fine.”
“It really isn’t.” Martin sighs, and swings his legs over the edge of the bed. “I’m sorry. I should leave.”
Tim doesn’t answer at first. When Martin turns to look at him, he’s watching him closely. “I mean… you don’t have to?” Tim finally says with a shrug.
Martin blinks. “What?”
“Look, it’s late. You probably missed the last tube. I don’t mind if you stay over, even without sex. I can take the couch, if you want. Or we can share the bed, if you’re comfortable with that. No offence, but you look like you could do with a hug.”
Martin lets out a wet laugh, wiping his eyes. “I really do,” he admits.
Tim grins. “Then stay. Nothing untoward, I promise.”
Letting out a long breath, Martin relaxes back onto the bed. He can’t remember the last time he platonically shared a bed with someone, and the longing for this kind of closeness extinguishes any leftover embarrassment. He can’t bring himself to move. “Yeah,” he finally says. “Yeah, okay.”
~~~
Spending the night with the Admiral purring on his chest always does wonders for Jon’s anxiety. It’s still a quiet thrum under his skin the next morning, but it’s nothing compared to the jittery mess he was the day before. Tim was right. He got this. He can tell Martin. Maybe Jon can convince him to take his lunch box outside today, and they can find a quiet spot in a park to talk…
As Jon makes the short walk back to his flat to grab his bag for work, he’s pondering his exact words, turning the sentences around in his head over and over again. By the time he’s turning the key in the lock he’s tentatively settled on “Martin, I don’t experience sexual attraction to anyone and do not enjoy intercourse, but I do like you and if you’re still amenable I would really like to go out for dinner with you”. Yes, that might do it.
He’s still distracted and deep in thought as he makes his way into the flat. The voices from down the hall barely register, until he makes his way to the kitchen and freezes on the spot.
Standing at the counter is none other than Martin. He has his back to Jon as he pours hot water from the kettle into two mugs. It’s a motion that’s so very familiar from all the times Jon ran into him in the breakroom, and yet it’s so strange that Jon can barely wrap his head around it. Because this is Martin in his kitchen, clad in nothing but an undershirt and pyjama trousers. Oh, fuck.
Tim shouts something from the direction of his bedroom that Jon can’t make out over the rush of blood in his ears. Martin laughs, the sound ringing in Jon’s head like a bell, and turns to answer.
That is the moment when he spots Jon. He goes stock still, the colour draining from his face as his eyes widen in shock. Jon still can’t move. He tries not to stare, but it’s to no avail. This is something that could’ve been plucked out of Jon’s most domestic fantasies, except that Martin’s pyjama trousers have obviously been borrowed from Tim and Jon just can’t.
“J-Jon?” Martin stutters, his voice even higher pitched than usual.
“Martin,” Jon manages to get out. His voice sounds as faint as he feels.
Tim suddenly appears in the doorway. “What are you- oh.” Tim’s eyes go wide as he looks from Jon to Martin and back.
“What are you doing here?” Martin finally squeaks.
“I- I live here.” Jon ducks his head, trying to escape both Martin’s and Tim’s eyes on him. “Sorry, I just…”
“Oh, Christ.” Tim looks at Martin in shock. “Is Jon your coworker that you…”
Martin lets out a desperate sound from the back of his throat. He nods, and Jon isn’t sure if he’s missing context or if he just doesn’t understand what they’re talking about because his brain has turned into static. It’s hard to grasp a coherent thought. He doesn’t really have it in him to process their words. His ears are still ringing, and he can feel the panic clawing up his throat and-
“I- I need to get to work,” he blurts out. He needs to get out, right now. Without waiting for anyone to speak, Jon whirls around, grabs his bag that he dropped in the hallway the previous day, and rushes out of the flat.
The front door slams shut behind him.
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here’s the next part of my liveblog - this time, ch2′s investigation! i had a lot to say...sorry for having strong feelings about the silly anime game it will happen again.
-kiibo’s gayass scream when they threw him into the tank made me CACKLE, i love him but his suffering is always a little bit funny sorry
-”h-how...!? how...could this happen!? we...swore to each other, didn’t we? we swore we’d never let the killing game happen again. so that was all just a lie! you guys are liars! all you liars, apologize to ryoma! he believed the killing game wouldn’t happen anymore!” this is, iirc, the most extended reaction kokichi ever has to a body discovery. normally it’s just a line or two, but he goes for a whole monologue here! it makes sense - ryoma and him had a fairly friendly relationship. ryoma never calls him out for lying (just occasionally tells him not to be so loud) and once notes that kokichi, like him, seems like he doesn’t plan to survive the killing game. add that to the fact that kokichi SAW kirumi’s motive video, failed to show it to anyone, and spent a significant amount of time trying to distract her with “tag” last night, and it’s not hard to imagine one of the “liars” he’s so mad at for letting the killing game start up again is...well...himself.
-i’ve never understood why the monokuma files are physical tablets that get handed out to everyone, rather than just being files added to their monopads. seems like a waste of resources mr monokuma!!
-”i’ll take full responsibility. since you’re my sidekick, there’s nothing to worry about.” i have to admit, it’s pretty clever. it soothes shuichi’s anxieties about difficult decisions, which makes the trial go smoother, while simultaneously feeding kaito’s hero....thing.
-it’s time we talk about what the fuck shuichi’s fingers are doing in his thinking sprite. WHY DO THEY LOOK LIKE THAT.
-all of them wondering how himiko got out of the tank when there’s visible door hinges on the stairs is KILLING ME.
-”good luck, shuichi! after all, it’s gonna be you doing all the heavy lifting here!” “ah...right.” “what do you mean “right”!? are you saying i’m useless!?” KAITO A MAN IS DEAD WE DON’T HAVE TIME FOR YOUR COMPLEX
-”but, i think leaving that guy alone is just plain bad...” [tsumugi gave kokichi a meaningful glance.] “so, i’ve decided to plainly keep an eye on him.” OCs already getting away from you, tsumugi?
- “yeah...we shoulda gathered together and watched all the videos. share everybody’s motives. even if it’s something you can’t bear by yourself, it’d be possible with everyone. that’s what cooperation is, right?” “that’s...what kokichi was trying to do.” “huh?” “kokichi was trying to get us to participate in a motive video viewing party of sorts. that’s why he forced us into the same room. do you think that was his way of cooperating? do you think the same way?” “n-no...if that’s what he wanted, he coulda just asked us. that’s what a normal person woulda done, but the thing is, he’s *not* normal. maybe he did want us to cooperate, but there’s no way to know for sure. he’d never tell us.” [that’s true...it’s impossible to know what kokichi is thinking. but...i suppose he *could* have been acting in our favor for once.] IMGONNA KILL MYSELF HE SAID TO YOUR FACE, LITERALLY YESTERDAY THAT OPEN COOPERATION WOULD GET YOU MURDERED!! YOU CAN’T CRACK OPEN HIS THOUGHT PROCESS AND THEN GO “bUt He’S tHe EmBoDiMeNt Of a LiE tHo” AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA. i keep trying to write a longer analysis of this and then dissolving into incomprehensible rage. kodaka wants kokichi to be cool and unsolvable and mysterious soooo bad that he accidentally gives his genius detective short-term memory loss. i haven’t unclenched my jaw in seventeen days.
-the prison-themed bathroom is so pointedly cruel, god...and it’s not even the worst thing that monokuma does to ryoma this chapter.....
-[no! i want to live! i want to live a long life! i don’t want to die! i can’t die in a place like this! never!] U GO SHUICHI!!
-”himiko’s so suspicious, she’s gotta be a red herring, right?” I Love Tsumugi Shirogane
-”you’re thinking too hard about it...living things just gotta live. anyway, no matter what happens to us, we gotta live!” “yeah...you don’t really need a reason to live. that’s just the icing on the cake!” kaito and kokichi agreeing on something and it’s NOT about hiding important things from their friends?? i never thought i’d see the day...
-”i did not calculate that we would gather here under these circumstances again...what would kaede say if she saw us right now...?” aww, kiibo :[
-[normally, i wouldn’t mind the shaking...but i’m feeling especially sensitive to it now. each of us felt that trembling through our entire bodies as we sank further still. without sure footing, i’m positive i would have fallen as well. my breathing was becoming more ragged, my heart pounded harder and harder...just when i thought i would pass out from the nerves - the elevator came to a stop.] SHUICHI THAT’S NOT “NERVES” YOU JUST DESCRIBED AN ANXIETY ATTACK D:
-”you put a lot of elaborate detail into this courtroom. almost like it’s for show.” “for show, huh? that’s an interesting way to put it.” “is this just for show? are you showing this to the people outside and-” sorry, kirumi, but you, kokichi, and monokuma have very different ideas about “the people outside”....you’re not even having the same conversation, really.
-that’s as far as we get before the trial! see you next time!!
#so many strong feelings!! it's why v3 is my favorite game#thh and sdr2 are both Pretty Alright but v3 invokes both incredible joy and seething rage in me#dr#mem liveblogs
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all or nothing episode 5: stream of consciousness comments
-oh boy...NOT READY
-edu and the january transfer window...how we all feel lol
-that side of me that loves...legal proceedings and shit (when reading “true crime” stuff in the past my fav part was always the trial) finds this stuff about the auba dilemma really interesting
-y’all work with mikel why can’t you say his name right omg
-edu being like WARNING: talking to mikel about this issue will be Dangerous Proceed With Caution
-man this all is just. Uncomfortable to watch
-mikel arteta eyebrows queen of north london
-mikel drops his first “fucking” of the episode
-granit staring at him so Intently whenever he talks 🥺
-eddie nketiah episode??? omg fuck yes i love this for us
-oh gosh nottingham forest....here comes the dressing room....wait shit granit wasn’t even there bc of covid so we’ll never get to see how he reacted to that (in person)
-FFF I FORGOT THIS IS WHEN NUNO COMES OFF IN THE 1ST HALF
-omg “if i lose a duel i get upset”...at one point he just straight up shrieked i swear what demon lives inside of this man
-charlie patino is like what did i get myself into
-god i just wanna hug all of them....i Love them so much
-LMAO emile going to nando’s bc his mom isn’t home ajkdf;akldf
-the way every scene mikel and this tim lewis guy have together is like an evil mastermind scene...and he sucks up to mikel so much “my relationship with mikel isn’t transactional” yeah ok sure
-OMG just got a clip of mikel saying his own name that kind of thing is Important (*it sounds really cute when he says it lmao)
-wait what is this a granit episode all of a sudden?
-granit laughing happily: “i’m one of the oldest already! and i’m still 28!”
-i SWEAR when granit smiles and laughs the world is literally ok again!!! he is a GIFT!
- “people think i’m very aggressive, because of my game”
-jfc whenever i see him mouthing “fuck off” in that clip i get [redacted]
-OMG GRANIT TELLING THESE FANS HARASSING HIM TO SHUT UP JADKFLKADF;AKF god why didn’t u make me granit
-”not one of us as kids start football because of the money. you start football because you love it”
-beautiful shots of granit omg ffffff god i wish amazon let you fuckin screenshot
-ah, and this segues right into liverpool lol
-granit being mini manager in the dressing room
-let’s stop and reflect on how PERFECT xhakarteta is as a couple they were made for each other tyvm i’m having sO many emotions and Feelings
-granit sad and alone and upset in the dressing room after kicking diogo jota...oh my whole heart i love one man. i know we saw this in the trailer but y’all it’s beautiful and heartbreaking
-laca and baby gabi coming off the pitch holding hands...my HEART
-oh oh oh they show mikel going over to hug sad granit before he leaves the dressing room....hgjskgjsjsg it was G rated but it says it all
-mikel asking the staff how to pronounce “goosebumps” lmao
-his nice dressing room talks are so sweet and heartfelt
-ayo i don’t need these fans’ shitty opinions on granit...keep it to Yourselves
-kt and rob coming into the canteen all hyped up!!!!! i love them!!! i hope someone takes a video of them dancing pls
-ben white and aaron content!...omg seeing that gabon scored....sigh
-this scene of everyone teasing granit about his card....his bde in this is INSANE and it’s also kinda serving deki vibes for me god i’m having such like Envy and Feelings
-OMG WAIT ARE WE GOING TO HIS HOUSE NOW OMG
-OMG HE JUST SAID SHPIRTI IM TO AYANA I AM DYING AND SCREAMING
-his kids are so cute and happy the family life vibes are SOLID
-yo we get to hear leonita speak?!! she has a really nice voice (vanja vibes) and i like what she’s saying about granit
-THIS WAS AMAZING IT’S EVERYTHING I’M DYING AJDKF;LAKDFDF
-back to auba drama...sigh
-SIR put your fucking eyelashes AWAY sos 911
-DUBAI TIME
- “in spain they call it casa pepe...it means pepe’s house he can do whatever he fucking wants.” ...mikel there’s no way that’s a thing but can we all just start saying “casa pepe” now
-mikel praising granit :’))) whose Slutty Dubai Arms are in all their glory
-mikel Yelling at granit on the pitch omggggg...
-he’s losing his voice again and the dude goes “your voice is fucking terrible” jakd;akdlfdf drag him
-LMAO barca dicking around is anyone surprised
-they literally got the deal done ONE MINUTE before the deadline??? i’d say “that was fake for tv” but this is arsenal football club after all
-wow that episode was...wow
-the last one left to watch is going to be a WHOPPER cause it has us going to mikel’s house? it’s shorter than the others but like. do i have the ability to process that rn
-damn guys just w Ow this episode was doing the most
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how does “god’s love” lead to kicking me out in the cold?? via /r/atheism
how does “god’s love” lead to kicking me out in the cold??
sorry, i just don’t get the pipeline here. i’m 17, still a minor, living under my parents’ roof. after i had a major breakdown a few months ago and needed treatment for my mental health, my treatment team basically told my parents “you can’t keep forcing her to go to church every week unless you want her to stay like this, also she’s an atheist” and we came to the “agreement” that i would only have to watch part of a service from our church online once every 2 weeks. i say “agreement” cause its not like i could say no or ask for anything else?? i agreed to nothing !
yesterday the sermon was on a topic that pissed me off and really hit somewhere i’ve been trying to heal (abandonment) so first i was just on my phone to distract myself. my father scolded me a couple times and said through gritted teeth “put the phone down” so i kinda just had to sit there and deal. i cried. after the sermon i asked if i could leave since i was upset because i did the jesus-y part and the rest is prayers i don’t do anyway. my mom was like “oh are u upset?” (no shit???) but this set off my father.
he said “cut the crap, this is the agreement we made” and i said “yep, and i sat through the sermon like we agreed i’d do” so he said “you’re not getting a PENNY from me for college if you don’t go to church once a month.” and i said “ok, and i will. i won’t believe a word of it” and he said “look now you’re making us miss the important part, the prayers” and i said “u can still pray? i wasn’t going to anyway” and he started to yell so i stood up to go to my room, but he said “you know what, yeah, get out of here. get out of my house” and so i went for the door instead, putting on my brother’s shoes because they were on the way. i can’t remember what he was yelling but i said to myself at some point “this house is a fucking nightmare” which i’m sure he heard. the main thing i remember is right before i left he yelled “I HOPE YOU ENJOY BURNING IN HELL.” and “THAT’S WHERE YOU’RE GOING, HELL. HOPE YOU LIKE IT” to which i yelled back (for the first time in my life let me add, i have never risen my voice at either of my parents) “I WILL AS LONG AS YOU WON’T BE THERE” and i left. called my friend and asked her to pick me up after i walked for a while, it’s like 40°F here and i was in shorts and a t-shirt so i was getting cold. she took me back to her place. her mom is a cop and is close friends with mine, so after a little bit her mom made me go back with her and made sure i got inside my house okay. i told my mom i didn’t want to talk to her at the moment when she greeted me like i’d just come home from work. she didn’t say a word while her husband screamed at her daughter about how he hopes she enjoys eternal suffering, which is “what she deserves,” and didn’t argue or come after me when i was told to leave. so i was a bit too upset for a conversation.
i don’t get where in his mind this equates to love. there’s no proof that a god exists but he has a daughter in the flesh, yet he’s willing to throw her out because she asked to leave the room to… perpetuate god’s love? god must be a dick if this is how he wants his children to act.
Submitted April 24, 2023 at 12:22PM by well-yes-but-no
(From Reddit https://ift.tt/DBn7Vh3)
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It’s.. it’s been a long time since i wrote something on here.
2022, well, it was different. But im gonna walk you through it - put you on the loop.
I spent january this year chasing my then-boyfriend. Don’t know who it is? Of course not, but you believe me if i told you. It’s the dude i liked my entire junior high. Thats right. I dated my crush. Shit was way different than i had imagined - but its done. Anyways, he often hurt my feelings bc he was a very tactless person. He was ugly too. The cum face was unbearable. Sorry to that man. I ended up leaving him, only realizing i wanted him back. I chased after him for some reason. Spent the last of my money on his expensive ass medicine. Went around looking for a specific kind of drink he wanted. Did all that only for him to tell me “what’s not clicking?” Like the fucking asshole he is. That was when i realized i didnt want to do anything with him. I wanted him gone from my life. And he is gone, finally.
Then the next few months happened. I got assaulted twice in the same year. The first time, i realized it only after a few months. I had hooked up with my senior high school crush then. I told my friend dexter about it and he said “why are you so grossed out by xx but you’re so happy about yy”. Then i realized why i slipped into a lot of self-loathing of xx. Its because i didnt consent to it. I didnt want it. I didnt enjoy it. It was fucking traumatizing. I fucking hate every moment that memory crosses my mind. I wish i never had to go through it. The second time it was also with a friend who i trusted naively. Idk why the fuck i decided to go with him. It was the wrong fucking choice. I only realized it wasn’t okay when i drunkenly called my ex-bestie about it, and he told me it wasn’t okay. The trauma for this one was so bad because every time a room would be completely dark, i’d be scared shitless and i’d teleport back into that fucking bedroom. I fucking hate it so much. I don’t know why i had let that night happen.
Despite it all, i was able to date someone. We lived in together, he let me drive his car, i bought him an expensive ass wallet, a lot. Shit ended ugly tho. He ended up man handling me. We would often get into screaming matches.
I hate myself when im angry. When i have to raise my voice in certain situations. I really fucking hate it. To realize that he brought out that version of me makes me fucking sick. Makes me hate the person i allowed myself to become just because of him.
Dont get me wrong. I didnt want a relationship. I wasnt ready for a relationship. Which made me wonder, why the fuck did i ever force anything to develop between the two of us? Even when i got an ick on the first date? If i could turn back time, i honestly would. Because fuck that situationship for real. Makes me so fucking upset he brought out the worst in me. Making me feel all fucking worthless. Like im always the bad guy. He stole my friends from me too. What kind of fucking person does that? He’s so fucking greedy. He doesn’t give a fuck that my friends no longer hang out with me as long as he gets to hang out with them.
I fucking hate the fact i ever dated him. It was the worst fucking emotional and mental turmoil i ever had to fucking go through. Beat my relationship with gg on a whole mile. Yawa jd kaayo gyud. Ngano man kong nipatol adto niya?
The amount of emotional labour i had to do. Even when he knew my mental state. He’s such a selfish fucking person emotionally. He’s so fucking greedy in the name of “love”. Like what the fuck kind of person makes u feel guilty about leaving them? About wanting some time for yourself? What a stupid fucking situationship. He accuses me of not knowing him when he has this narrative of me being the worst fucking person. Fuck that man for real. I wish all my exes bad luck. I dont care. I know I’ll get guilty once the karma hits them - but shit doesnt happen just because karma wants to. Shit happens to people because they deserve it. The universe thinks they deserve it so its gonna hand it to them.
If im getting my karma. Thats fine. Im the type of person who knows i dont make a lot of great decisions so if karma goes my way, ill let it happen as it should.
I dont know how im gonna move forward from all of this. Ive been feeling so fucking lonely ever since he fucking stole my friends from me. I dont know what to fucking do but i hope i bounce back better when i get back to duma.
I wanna stay optimistic. I wanna have something to look forward to. And yet all ive done since the break up is be so self destructive. I kissed pp, and have him reject me weeks later. Then i hooked up with bb and nn. Then i had kk pick me up and we made out for a bit. He confessed on new year’s but idk i really dont want to deal with anything. I didnt want to do anything with nn because i didnt like his build, his personality is too fucking kind its actually the fucking worst 😭 made me reminiscent of the dude i dated this year. Its always the fucking nice guys who give the most emotional labor so im avoiding nice guys. Or guys in general.
Im in a man-hater phase rn. Fucking pp is crushing on a girl who tried to set me up with him. Yawa. Worst fucking feeling ever. Yawa jd kaayo. It made me see how much of a fucking asshole he is. And i dont wanna deal with him na jd because of how awful he is. Yawa. Pero i might give him cookies still when i get back? Im not sure. I probably will.
I dont know. Im just not bothered to entertain anyone but i am still talking to bb for some fucking reason. It’s probably gonna die out soon. Or probably not. Being with him is fun. But i hope it wont cross to the relationship level. Ill probably just decrease the amount of texting we do. Shits too risky. 2022/3 marga would know why. Hahahahahaha. If something bad happens out of this, you know im gonna either edit this post or make a separate post.
I still dont fucking know if 2023 is gonna be good. Its just making me anxious. Im writing this long ass post knowing i havent finished my plates yet. I havent done anything remotely productive. I dont know why im so fucking depressed. And normally, when i write, i feel a bit better. But only my mood changed. Im not as fucking depressed as i was a few minutes ago but my fucking soul still feels like it has weights on it. Shits so fucking heavy.
I think im still not over the fact that i had to go through months of whatever he put me through shit was so fucking tiring. I did not have to go through that. I did not have to go through every single thing he put me through during and after the relationship. I think my biggest takeaway from all of this is the fact i can feel And see the change that happened in me and it wasnt for the better. I lost so much of my light and life because of him. This is the only relationship i could ever completely say i wish i got back the person i was before him. Yawa jd kaayo. Ambot makalagot nga ing ani na akong state karon. Unta mabalik akong gana sa tanan. Kay sa tinuod lang, nawala gyud. Maka disappoint jd kaayo ang outcome bwiset.
Yawa huhuhuhuhu unta madayon akong mga gi look forward sa 2023.
1. New hair color and hair cut
2. Motor pls
3. cookies for all my friends
4. Mental stability
5. Reclaiming my old self
I really just want to bring the person i was before him. I just want peace. I just want to feel better. I just want to be productive again. I just want to be better.
Ive been rambling for the past few paragraphs as u can see but im just typing as much as i can until i finally lose the dreadful feeling weighing down on me because honestly i still feel like shit. Yawa huhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhu
I wanna buy a new vape but i think that also contributes to why i feel like shit so i might quit. Im gonna try hard and quit this year because my nicotine addiction is unexpected and unwelcome and i want to be better about it. So i might actually stop vaping. Please God make me stop vaping 😭
Im also so fucking upset because i looked forward to writing something on tumblr hoping it would make me feel better but the dread isnt going away. I want to feel better but i really cant im so fucking sad and upset and i hope its just the estrogen jud but like this has been going on for months and i honestly just need to meditate and be more accepting of my fate and have to look forward to things because theres so much to unfold for 2023 and i really really really hope my looking forward doesnt go in vain. I love you world. Please dont let me down.
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my emotions have kind of, exploded recently. they’ve hit the metamorphic, top, the peak, the ceiling. etc. thruout the past week alone it’s been - or, i’ve been, a tantrum-y, volatile mess.
i don’t think i’ve had the... capacity, to go, “i think we need sleep apart, tonight,” ever. in the course of our entire relationship. for the greater good, yeah, and we talked abt it the morning after and it was like... Yeah OK that was, the right call, to make. BPD rage is not fun to experience, for either party... and it was a constructive talk, bettered our relationship and all.
really the extremeness, of it all, is annoying. exhausting. it can’t be described easily, err, like... “it’s a firework, short but intense,” because - not always! intense and long! or long and mild, but SO SO VERY LONG... etc. and it’s unreliable. some days i can handle a mountainous weight of troubles and groan little. whereas the day before or its tomorrow - total nuclear meltdown from something trivial. minor, to the point it can’t be given example.
i’m justtt.t...tt... (rubs at face) Tired. of this. he is Patient (the most, saintlike, etc, yada yada cooing) and coddles me and comforts regardless. but i feel .. bad... despite knowing that i can’t. help, it. and the episodes themselves aren’t as frequent NOR as severe. which doesn’t feel true, but it is, we both know this.
smth smth... Wish i was normal, for his sake. really. (dry laugh) fuck off everyone else, you can deal with my neurosis, whatever. BUT MY BOY SHOULDN’T... LET ME BE NEUROTYPICAL AND TRAUMA-FREE, IF JUST FOR HIM.
@@;; He is special and oh boy. is that unfortunate. my brain has conjured up one whole empathy for him. i remember the feeling, of the first time, of... “i’ve hurt him and i feel... bad...” awful, stomach-twisting, akin to a hot knife’s stab. and when i later relayed this agony to him, he was just. yeah, you. uh. you care about me, to the point of... you’ve empathetic
and it’s just
(me grabbing at my heart, trying to pull the emotional valve out) AUGH!! BUT I DON’T!!! WANT TO!!!!!!!! EMPATHY IS STUPID!!!!!!!! but i just wallow in remorse. head-first in my watery sobs and pooling blood, lol.
cut to him at the side, all blushy. o-oh wow, i really am special... he ONLY feels empathy for ME... i made him feel regret... u///u
prior to our relationship i detested. complications or arguments due to their... longevity and strain. very few reward for an overwrought and annoying affair.
while that’s... still true, in some regard, ofc. now it’s flavored with, “if i hurt him, i’ll be hurting myself :(. i’ll feel bad, remorseful, and guilty” and the. well. ASPD part of my brain screams “NO! NO!!!!!!!!!!!!” thrashing and screaming. i am a void incapable of ‘affection’ beyond material, self-interested gain, i do not have an ingrained morality - YOU CAN’T MAKE ME, FEEL. FOR OTHERS, TO THE EXTEND THAT I FEEL WHAT THEY FEEL. PAIN, PLEASURE... i cannot ‘relate’ to anyone! if i make someone cry, i’m not gonna feel bad!!!!!!!!!!! fuck you!!!!!!!
alas. ice queen defrosted. i..... care... and thus being a webbed experience of. Near Daily pain, with a background of near 2 decades’ of nonstop trauma... which has culminated in, an underdeveloped adult with the mentality & emotional regulation of a child. and better we acknowledge the borderline and psychotic spice, too
i feel. BAD. for him, because of him, for me, because of me. fuck this (tries, yet again, to carve heart out. unsuccessfully)
the explanation of it, the culprit being, “winter,” SOUNDS - awful! usually i don’t get into these terrible dips until mid-late nov, it’s barely autumn, the temperature hasn’t even dipped yet... but even if by some shred it makes sense. longer nights and fluxing cold. i fear the actual wintry time, if this is the precursor.
nov-march (or, ah, even april, in fairness) months have always been the. Always the Testy Months. make or break. this particular year we are hoping he is coming to visit, but it’s still a tentative thing, and it’s give or take a week, a four week drop-in. it’s exciting and nervewracking, the... face-to-face, sleeping in the same bed, TRAPPED WITHIN MY SHITTY STUDIO... altho like we’ve had, numerous convos abt this. discussed the possibility. “if we’re not compatible, in the flesh - you are still the most important person in my life” etc. so...
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me being called FUNNY? BY YOU???!!! 😳😳 can the day get any better 😌😚 no but the real question is was i joking or actually flirting w you 😏🤭
ono :( I'm rlly sorry about the concert scene love :( are the postponed dates out yet?!
take hugs (╥﹏╥)
༼ つ ◕‿◕ ༽つ
༼ つ ◕‿◕ ༽つ
i hope you get to see them SOOOOON 🥺💕🤞🏻
albeit i have almost (¿) no chance in any near future to see any of my fav bands/artists kpop or not, i love seeing all you people's concert vids & pics 😭😭❤️
i have been pretty busy w etc etc so i have just been catching up on all the (my ult groups' XD) concert content here & thereee ( also lemme know who are your ult groups&solos hehe <3 I'll let u know in our next convo huhu !! )
my jagi 💘 writing texts as low-key a coping mechanism
🤝
me (& the rest of us ofc) reading it as a coping mechanism
AS WE SHOULD MAKE YOU FEEL???!!!!! 😎😎💕
i hope you are feeling better after coming on tumblr today
:( 🫂 right here if u wanna talk more about anything & everything 🥺
ILY2 my 자기야 😌😌😌💘🍯
also I'd like to know your pronouns if u are comfortable sharing it !! mine is she/her hehe :D
mwahhh byeee nowwwww
sorry this is the last lmao, just popped in my brain rn
have you come across/listened to this song called GLIMPSE OF US ?! 🤧 if yessss, do you listen to joji?! if no, pls pls listen to it BUT NOT TODAY( i don't want you to be more sadder) ;-; we can scream in detail abt it later lmaoo😭🤯😓
the concert date has yet to be announced, i know three members got covid and dear god poor lino got covid twice in the span of what??? 4 months??? bye 😭😭😭 i’m on a similar boat where we almost never get concerts where i am (canada 💀) which is why my friend and i had the spontaneous idea to fly out and let me tell you 💀 nothing seems to be going as planned for me lately so idk what i was expecting 😭 ofc i hope for their speedy recovery and i definitely want them to put their health first!
oh dear god you do NOT want to make me go on a ramble about my ult groups!!!! because i’m about to and you’re gonna regret it! 
i consider myself a really oldddd kpop stan (ie i started stanning when i was suuuuuper young in 2013ish-2014)
nowadays, i’m really into skz (they’re on a time out rn tho for obvious reasons), tbz (what’s new LMAO) and i listen to stayc and le sserafim a lot these days 🫶
but oof, i’ve stanned a lot of groups in my day. (i’m saying as if i’m in my 50’s 💀) *cracks knuckles* groups ive had HUGE phases for were bts, exo, day6, the boyz, and txt! (please keep in mind that these are me being overly obsessed and not just casually listening to their music but also tuning in to their variety shows and purchasing a lot of their albums )
and i’m pretty sure you can name a good chunk of the kpop industry and i’ve either heard a couple songs from them or actually know them well enough to know their names and stuff!
i’m one of the very few people who stanned bts since debut too! and to this day it’s my biggest flex 😌 i can confidently say that i feel the most connected to them for sure, they influenced a BIG chunk of my life and as you can see, my username has not changed and i never plan to change it. jimin had been my ultimate of ultimate biases for a long ass time and he’s the only idol i can say brings me an immense load of comfort (i actually named my cat after him 🤭🤭🤭) i’m soooo proud of them and i can’t describe into words how much they deserve every bit of success they’ve gotten.
also, YES IVE HEARD A GLIMPSE OF US AND 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 i think it’s the fact that i’ve been pathetically single my whole life and i’m scared i’ll never be someone’s first love 💀 but i also embrace my singleness and don’t really give a fuck about men cus they’re musty. 💀 i don’t think i’ve listened to any other joji song tho, are there any that you recommend? 🤭🫶
omg i just realized i’ve never formally introduced myself and i should really do that….. i’ll make a post about it soon 🤭
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