#and I am not ready to go back to that | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

waywardstation · 2 years

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This was not intended but activity is going to be severely strained for a bit; a couple days back I found out I missed a pretty important email regarding a school project of mine (my school email loves to toss anything into spam if it came from an address that’s not part of the university’s system ;-;) and have been working to get all of that sorted.

I already know this work is going to be bleeding into my semester and I’m going to have to dedicate nearly all my free time to it. But it’s why I’ve barely posted anything these last few days, and why it might still be like that for a bit. Apologies!

#please do not let the whole school year be like this I feel like I’m working on projects 24/7 all over again ;-;#i suprised myself by staying up for over 72 hours at the end of last semester just to try and finish this project #and I am not ready to go back to that #literally three night cycles passed by and I was holed up in a lab #and let me tell you that day I learned that staying up that long will make your body electric #like you’re sitting in a masssage chair and it’s vibrating even though you’re just sitting there #that is NOT GOOD #especially as someone with preexisting heart issues #the amount of work my school requires me to get done is insane #every class treats itself like it’s the only class I have #and I have to go along with it if I want to keep my scholarshipsssss ;-;#I’ll try not to let it get that bad this year #i cannot wait to graduate haha

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toytulini · 11 months

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listen im ace and im pro kink at pride and whatever, but the way some of yall are wording your posts in response to the backlash against it is uh. really taking me back to the ace shitcourse era.

yall know theres nothing wrong with being a "virgin", right? that its not inherently shameful to have not had sex, to never have sex, even if youre not ace, even if you do want to have sex someday, like, its fine that you haven't had sex?

maybe if your problem is that theyre trying to police your behavior and shame you for expressing your sexuality, you can say that? instead of resorting to "haha stupid virgin gets no bitches" like my god. do you not hear how fucking regressive that attitude is? i know, i know, youre "joking".

get a better joke

#toy txt post #god im going to regret this post im gonna regret it so much i can feel it in my bones #let it flop..........pls #internalize my message let it sink in and understand what i am saying and then let the post flop #i say. knowing the ppl who need to see such a message are the ones who will make me regret this post and regrwt not having #1 million bajillion disclaimers #virgin is in quotes bc its a bullshit made up stupid purity culture concept anyway and quite frankly i hate even seeing the word #disclaimer: the previous sentence is not me saying that it is a slur for asexuals. it is me a single individual saying this specific word #grosses me out to read and see everywhere when its a stupid bullshit binary made up or at least historically largely used #to shame largely women and i dont know why we're still using it in 2023 #and ive just been. seeing such an uptick in this whole like. attitude? lately and like #im ace im minorly sex repulsed. mostly about anything sex at me bad. other adults sex at each other consensually? go wild #i like to think im pretty chill about it. i try to be. i think its fine ig to be like 'my meat is huge i fuck so much so good'#like okay not my thing but good for you. love that for you #but then some of yall have started turning it back around back to. 'haha your meat so small and shriveled you get no bitches'#'haha stupid incel virgin' like okay. didnt realize we all went back to fucking. middle school but okay #god im gonna run out of tine to get ready for my thing writing this stupid post UGH evil #but like idk we've kinda circled back to being like haha being a virgin still is stupid and silly and shameful #and if im quite honest. i do think the acecourse played a part in that bc i felt like we were making good progress in like #hey guys is fine to not have sex ever if you dont want to its fine to not want sex its fine #and then aphobes went fucking rabid on us and splintered and destroyed online communities all over but especially on tumblr #and so many aces went back in the closet we stopped talking about it we stopped spreading awareness and now this stupid goddamn like #and now this stupid bullshit attitude is back where its like funny to call someone a virgin as an insult but like no bro trust me its okay #its okay for me to do it bc im a hot queer person with huge meat instead of a cisstraight frat bro with huge meat #? like you know the issue was the behavior right? not the fact that it was straight dudes saying it? its bc the thing being said was shitty?#you know you can dunk on the puritan bitches trying to police your behavior at pride without getting us as collateral damage right #stop making me read that stupid ugly ass word ur not cool or funny #whatever #if you come on to this post to start shit i will not only block you but as many of your mutuals and followers as i can find. i will scroll #i will block this entire fucking website if i need to do not test me. i am exhausted and the acecourse ate up all my tolerance in 2015.

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egophiliac · 1 year

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Are you excited for Malleus to read us all his Fanfiction?

Malleus making a perfect dreamworld for all of us to live in like

#art #twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland spoilers #twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers #twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers #it's SO CLOSE i can TASTE IT #tastes like delicious angst >:)#and this probably isn't even the RESOLUTION it's just going to end on another MASSIVE CLIFFHANGER and MURDER MY SOUL #i am not ready. i'm not.#on the other hand i am SO READY to meet ortho's puppies!#they have names now! KB-RS01 & 02!#and you can have them in your guest room?! what?! i need to get back into doing that

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spicyspell · 11 months

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Like a sleeper agent, I have awoken.

(Ps: my commissions are open :)

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betweenblackberrybranches · 9 months

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My personal au titled "take me home au"

I have many pages of this written and drawn out in ballpen from last december and i decided to finally remake it digitally to get back into drawing.

This is more of an self insert than a Y/N but i still use y/n because its more comfortable for me.

Moon is just a prickly guy there is no virus

#fnaf sun #fnaf moon #sundrop #moondrop #dca #daycare attendant x y/n #dcamv #my art #new au tag yay #tmh au #i miss drawing so here i am back at it again at krispy kreme #there are like 11 arcs #and then its open ended #soooo be ready for some self indulhent stuff #if i dont drop off the face of the earth again for weeks at a time #but ho boy stuff was happening #also i had just kinda lost sight of the blorbos for a bit but after working on this i am back babyyy #also i gotta say that “im going to sonic the hedgehog this” is a legit thing i say and my gf hates it

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the-lonelybarricade · 1 month

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I have such big feelings right now about how this fandom treats artists. This is the one hill I am willing to die on: all fandom artists deserve respect regardless of what ships they create art for.

Listen to me. Traditional fandom is dying. AI art is cropping up everywhere in fandom spaces, stealing work from real artists while getting twice as much recognition.

Meanwhile, the artists who are clawing and fighting to stay in these spaces are subject to constant criticism and harassment. They are taking hours to work on pieces that they share with us for free only to be bombarded with ungrateful comments. And on top of that, their work is constantly being stolen and reposted on other platforms without proper credit.

Fandom artists are fighting for their lives right now and the least that we can do is pay them the basic decency of shutting our mouths if we don't have anything nice to say.

If you are not paying the artist, then you are not entitled to art of your favorite ship.

If you are not paying the artist, then you are not entitled to art that fits into your specific interpretion of a ship.

If you want fandom artists to keep creating content that they share with us for free out of the kindness of their hearts, then you better learn to start supporting them.

Fandom artists are part of our community, and they SEE YOU making these negative comments. You may think that you're only putting down one specific artist, but they all see you. And they feel discouraged, and they feel angry, and they feel unwelcome, and many of them leave.

If you wonder why so many artists are putting their work behind patreon and withdrawing from fandom spaces, it's because of the way we treat them. Do better.

#I am ready to ride to WAR of behalf of our fandom artists #I am livid at the way I've seen some of you treat artists just because they make content for a ship you don't like #Ask yourself what you're actually contributing with your negativity #What results are you looking for??#Some of you need to go back to kindergaren i swear to god

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its-your-mind · 10 days

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JUST FOR THE RECORD.

the way Madam E talks is in fact Incredibly Extra (alex said somewhere that yeah duh that was the point) but also.

as a person who sits in a pretty diverse classroom of 12-14 year olds all day.

some of the Kids These Days do in fact talk like that. All the time. To everyone. No matter what. Front-facing camera not required.

The other day one of the individual-units-of-chaos-for-whom-I-am-responsible-for-8-hours-each-weekday asked if I had done anything fun over the weekend and I said "oh I just went for a short hike in the national park" and he straight up did this:

like. LIKE. madam E's tone. her inflection. her little trill on the end of words... some of the slang was a tad dated (though that does sort of make sense, if Madam E is ~5-10 years older than my gremlins-disguised-as-preteens) but I literally got whiplash every three minutes because all I could visualize for Madam E was a rotating cast of the like. Seven of my kiddos who talk EXACTLY like that.

which I WILL SAY. did make the horror hit home Just A Bit More Than Usual.

#tmagp #the magnus protocol #tmagp spoilers #madam e #magp 16 #like listen like madam e i too am an ink5oul stan #but NOT if they are gonna mess with one of my KIDS #idk if this is just because I am a teacher in the US #and so day 1 I had to accept the fact that I might have to put my own life in danger to protect my kiddos #and that coming into work every day was always a risk factor #and like. every time we have a lock down or an evacuation drill #(or a real lock down or shelter in place - I’ve never been part of a real evac thank god)#I am always in the back of my head thinking #‘I am absolutely 100% ready to flying tackle a shooter and/or lead my children in a stanley-water-bottle-projectile assault’#anyway ty jonny and alex for triggering my inner mama bear tendencies and then ripping out my heart with them #also Ink5oul can continue to go off as long as they do Not fuck with anyone who is like my kiddos ty for coming to my Ted talk

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fiberc · 4 months

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warmups n doodles between comms

#i am NOT tagging those pixel guys. m not ready to go back yet #art #original #rhythm heaven #sth #shadow the hedgehog #shadow #sonic the hedgehog #sonic #dj blue #dj yellow #i gues #classic sonic #dj school

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alloutshirt · 1 year

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they fell in love to that song

#oh styles what have you done #i am nowhere emotionally ready for this #larry #x #how do i go back and protect them

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mrsdulac · 1 month

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who else feeling inconsolable about claudia?

#i know it’s not just me #i am not and never will be ready #claudia i will avenge you #she didn’t deserve literally ANYTHING that happened to her #i can’t wait to go back to delulu land where she and mads have a happy ending #interview with the vampire #claudia #iwtv s2

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maeo-png · 9 months

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obsessed with tom kenny’s acting in simons episode, his slightly different tone 100% gives much more human vibes to simon and it’s like you can hear the difference between him and the ice king tone. it’s insane i love it

#i am READY to be destroyed by whatever ‘most emotional thing he’s ever recorded’ means!! (no i’m not)#adventure time #fiona and cake #fiona and cake spoilers #like #you can tell there’s a difference. go back and watch the original simon reveal clip on yt

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jasperyourmutt · 14 days

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hi everyone <3

I have a bit of a life update. To make a long story short, last week I was diagnosed with PTSD. I have been having a... very hard time coming to terms with that. For most of my life I believed I just had a bad anxiety disorder, but I am now realizing that is unfortunately not the case. The past couple months I have been in a near constant state of fight or flight, fear, panic, whatever you want to call it- without really realizing it. and man. it has been exhausting, mentally, physically, spiritually. I just thought it was normal to feel like this all the time. i assumed everyone felt like this. my therapist has helped me realize I am in a lot of pain right now and it is not normal. so. the good news is that there is an intensive trauma therapy that I will be doing for the next couple months that is going to really help me recover. i love and trust my therapist with my whole heart. there is a light at the end of the tunnel. i am finally getting the help i need. so. unfortunately I am going to step away from tumblr for a bit. i dont really want to do this, i love being on here. i love interacting with all the friends i've made here. kink has become a very important and healing part of my life. but it is just a little too much for me at the moment. I'm not sure when I will return, could be a couple weeks, a couple months. I'll return when I feel right. I feel like this may be a little odd to share here, but it's important to me to acknowledge and share that I have been having a really hard time. i tend to downplay when i'm in pain. i feel like people usually don't care about me (i know this is very very much not the case. im trying to convince my brain of that too.) its really hard for me to tell people when i am struggling, especially in my real life. so i am taking baby steps and starting here. so, until I return- chase your tails for me, roll in the grass, bark at the squirrels. take care of yourselves. if you are struggling, know youre loved. get the help you need. i will be curling up in my dog bed and taking a nap in the sun. ruff ruff. wag wag. much love to all of you.

#agh personal posts. i know this is mainly a dogboy kink blog and some people will not care. but this is my blog and i will share what i want #i am safe and okay. i am just.. struggling to accept that i am very very sick right now. i was raised to just push that shit way down.#im done doing that. i am going to have to feel all the pain to heal it. nervous but excited. ready but hesitant.#anyways. hi. i love what this blog has done for me. for what this community has done for me. i will be back. you cant get rid of me!#will be keeping an eye out for messages for the next couple days. but this post is mainly to give myself permission to take a step back.#its weird. i feel obligated to post here and am feeling guilty for putting myself first. but thats the trauma i guess!#anyways anyways anyways. if youve read all of this i love you. thank you for listening. see you soon.#jasperbarks

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alchemania · 7 months

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“Don't you hate her?”

Furina turned, eyebrows raised in confusion. “Huh?”

“Your creator. Don't you hate her?”

The girl pondered a moment, looking unsure. “I..don't know.”

“You should,” he asserted. “All this time you had to suffer alone, for what?? People who didn't even care about the real you?? People who were ungrateful and selfish and only cared about themselves, at the end of the day??”

“Not everyone is like that,” Furina protested, shaking her head slowly. “I ..did suffer, but it all worked out in the end. Besides, I wouldn't be here if it wasn't for her-”

“The same could be said for my mother,” Wanderer interrupted, eyes flashing. “I came into being because of her, but that doesn't make her a good person, or a good parent. She hurt me. These two facts can coexist. Focalors created you, yes, but she also subjected you to 500 years of suffering where you couldn't confide in ANYONE or risk losing everything. Wasn't that awful?? Wasn't it a horrible time? You were all alone living on a hope and a prayer, and if it went wrong, it would have been all for nothing. You were a means to an end, and what do you have to show for it? Sure, everybody was saved and all was well, but now you're just - a person, and people hate you for what you did, people hate you for what you DIDN'T do. Was it worth it?? Are you satisfied?”

“I am,” she nodded, after a beat. “Because, this is what I was created to do. And, I'm free now. I don't know what I'm going to do, but at least my life is mine. I can do whatever I want. I can live.” Wanderer's jaw clenched, and Furina frowned, nervously. “..why are you so angry?”

“Because SOMEONE has to be!” he shouted, voice cracking. “I mean- I heard about the trial, they were gonna kill you- they lured you there because you wouldn't talk, right? And then after everything, did anyone apologize to you or- praise you, for all the hell you went through? Anything??”

“.. Neuvillette is taking care of me.”

The pain on Wanderer's face was almost palpable, at that.

“..anything else?”

“.. it's fine," she tried to appease. "It's not like I serve any purpose anymore. Like I said, I did what I was created to, so I'm not of any use and-”

“Stop.”

“..what?”

“STOP- talking like that,” Wanderer snapped, eyes suspiciously glossy. She sounded so much like him, who he used to be, and it hurt so badly.

A blank sheet of paper has infinite potential, but it is nothing as long as it is empty, he'd said, a good while ago. He'd been wrong about himself, and Furina was wrong now.

“You're not just - what you were made for. You don't - what happened to you is wrong. You're not DISPOSABLE now that everything is over.”

“It- it was for everyone's sake, compared to my suffering, it's obvious what's more important! I had to save them! It’s what I was born for! It doesn't matter -”

“It DOES,” he yelled, eyes glowing an almost neon icy blue, and she startled. “Stop acting like your suffering was something that was necessary. Stop acting like it was just for the greater good. That doesn't matter! The fact of the matter is that you suffered, and you were hurt, and you're STILL hurting! And- barely anybody is there for you..your creator, she should have been there for you, she should have protected you, but she didn't. She didn't. And you - you have every right to be angry with her, for not being there for you. For you being unable to live, until now. It was wrong, even if it was, as she claimed, for the greater good. Don't defend her.”

"She loved me-"

"And she left you, so not enough."

Just like my mother ..

“...Wanderer,” Furina ventured, worry all over her face.

“What?”

“You're crying…”

..oh. He hadn't even noticed, but his cheeks WERE wet, and he put a hand to one with a start, quickly scrubbing at his face. “Ah-” and he pulled his hat over his face, to hide it.

“..it was a lot. I often wondered when everything would end. I wanted, to tell someone so badly what was going on,” Furina admitted, and Wanderer looked up, eyes red from weeping. “There were a lot of times I didn't think I was going to make it, but. But I did, and, and everything was okay.”

“But are you?”

There was a long pause, and the two of them stared at each other until Furina slowly shook her head no, hot tears streaming down her cheeks.

“See? You're - we're both so messed up, from everything, and no one was there,” Wanderer almost whispered, looking out the window. "No one was there to help. ..You're strong as hell, I'll give you that. If I was in your shoes, I don't know if I would have made it. It seems people are stronger than I've given them credit for..”

It was something that surprised him, again and again.

“I just don't understand why you care..”

“.. I don't know why I do,” he shrugged. “Maybe because you remind me of myself, and. It hurts, looking at you and feeling like I'm looking in the mirror. But someone has to be in your corner and -”

“And you want to do that?”

A pause.

“..Well, if you don't stand up for you, no telling who will.”

“You don't have to cry over me. I'm -”

“If you say you're not worth it, I am going to bodyslam you,” Wanderer growled, eyes flashing, and Furina put up her hands.

“I wasn't going to! I was going to say that I will be okay. Not now, but. Eventually. I'm healing. I promise. There's people who care, like you.”

Wanderer fell silent then, looking away, and she reached out and squeezed his hand. “Thank you. I'm still wrestling with - with what I want to do and where I'll go but. It's nice to know that I'm valued just for existing.”

“That's all you need to be valued,” he muttered, looking to the floor. “You don't have to prove the worth of your existence. It's fine to just be.”

“..are you talking to yourself, or me?”

He looked to her then, expression unreadable, and she smiled sadly, in understanding. “Both is good. It's okay to just be. We're here, and we'll be okay.”

“Yeah,” Wanderer whispered, giving a shaky breath. “..we will."

#screaming crying #i will probably go back and clean this up later but i just wanted to get it out there and start yelling #i think wanderer would be so so angry about what happened to furina and it just. weighs heavy on his heart and he's like god. GOD!!!#his heart is way squishier than he would like to admit he's ready to square up so quickly and had it not been for focalors being dead #oh BABY he'd have Some Words For Her #genshin impact #wanderer #furina #4.2 spoilers #AUGH I ALMOST FORGOT TO TAG SPOILERS SORRY SORRY #please god i am going to explode i am thinking so hard im in pain #ue ue ue ue ue #loved but left behind.....#a means to an end..you feel me...#im dyin scoob

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danwhobrowses · 20 days

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What's this? My skin, cleared? My crops, watered!? My heart, soaring!!??

Callowmoore softness, comfort and sleeping beside each other my FUCKING BELOVED!

#at the same time Zathuda motherfucker you BACK THE FUCK OFF #kill that bastard! kill him dead! or let me kill him: I'm ready I'll fucking do it!#is Fearne on 2 or 1 points of Exhaustion now? Kiki got rid of 2 but was it a long enough rest?#if 2 maybe sneak in some Ashton carrying Fearne next ep since she'll have half speed - also returning the favour from her carrying them #regardless both still need a rest to get rid of the last one before Aeor - another chance for cuddles #Essek glad you're back but you need to be very calm about the dunamancy in Ashton's head a lot is going on rn #maybe gently inform him that the hells have like 7 potions of possibility too...#damn I wish my skin was clear in real life XD but I got all the comfort I wanted from the two and more #Zathuda interruption and shadow fight with evil Fearnes though was not ordered #this is still the same night as FCG exploding let them rest Matthew!#I am not normal about them and I don't want to be normal about them I'm just AAAAAAAAAAAAA #callowmoore #fearne calloway #ashton greymoore #fearne x ashton #ashton x fearne #rockwild #ashley johnson #taliesin jaffe #critical role #cr3 spoilers #cr3e94 #bell's hells #bells hells #cr3 #cr campaign 3 #thank you tal and ashley #tag reader bonus hc: the hells all get FCG's grass logo tattooed on them

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you-got-it-capstar · 2 years

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i support womens rights AND wrongs

#disenchanted #disenchanted 2022 #disney #enchanted #giselle entering her evil stepmother arc is going to SLAY ME and I’m so ready #it’s like multiverse of madness with a dash of into the woods as a treat #side note PRINCE i mean KING EDWARD IS BACK MY BELOVED #i am a bit worried about the live action talking chipmunk especially bc he sounds different #but eh I’ll deal with it for corruption arc Giselle and fairy godmother Idina Menzel

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chryseiswriting-blog · 28 days

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Thing is, shits gonna have to get worse before it gets better. We will have to see either Jean or Jeremy get beaten to a bloody pulp before we finally see Jean snap.

I’m just glad when he does break, all those years of pent up rage will make whoever it is at fault regret the day they were born. He will rise like a hound out of hell and he will drag them, kicking and screaming, into the flames that burnt him all those times before.

He’s going to burn the house down.

I’m kind of hoping it’ll be Jeremy— king of the sunshine court, all bloody knuckles and bruised lips— who snaps but let’s not talk about that rn

#Jean is a starved dog just waiting to bite the hand that supposedly fed him.#he is ready to fight back; all he needs is a reason #all for the game #tsc #the sunshine court #He’s going to kick ass and I am HERE for it #Jean fucking Moreau ladies and gentlemen #jerejean #nora sakavic #jean moreau #aftg fandom #jeanandjeremy

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