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hannahmanderr · 1 year

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DannyMay Day 17 - Temper

lol I've got so much to catch up on

Words: 1,730

Summary: Jazz has never had the ghost-fighting skills that the rest of her family has. So what's she to do when a ghost attacks and she's left defenseless? (FFN)

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temper (n.): (1) a particular state of mind or feelings; (2) habit of mind, especially with respect to irritability or patience, outbursts of anger, or the like; disposition

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Jazz grunted as she braced herself against the force of the gale being created by the newest ghost attacking her house. Around her, the curtains whipped violently, threatening to rip off of the rod, and books and papers whirled around the room, forcing her to duck occasionally. The ghost in front of her - who reminded her of a misty version of the Pilsbury doughboy - knelt in midair, sobbing loudly into its hands.

As the winds buffeted against her, she mentally cursed. Mom and Dad were out on a call. Danny was with Sam and Tucker in the Ghost Zone, checking in on Sidney Poindexter after he’d had some sort of run-in with a particularly nasty pack of ghost wolves. Her Peeler and thermos were upstairs, under her bed, and every other possible weapon or means of defense - including the house’s security system - was out of reach. In other words, she was alone and unarmed. Two things she did not want to deal with when encountering an unfamiliar ghost.

“I-it’s gone…” the ghost blubbered. “Lost it… c-can’t…”

A particularly strong gust crashed into Jazz, causing her to stagger backwards. An armchair was knocked over and pushed towards her. Barely able to open her eyes because of the winds, she didn’t see it coming, and it swept her legs out from under her. She landed on the carpet with a thud and a bolt of pain up her arm. The ghost, upon seeing this, only sobbed harder.

“What - did you lose?” she tried to shout over the noise, but she could barely hear her own voice.

By some miracle, though, the ghost noticed and looked at her with watery purple eyes. “G-gone…” it said between sobs. “I-I hurt… hurt it…”

Jazz hoped she was actually frowning. It was too difficult to tell. “Hurt what?” she managed to gasp out.

“Th-the tower! I-it’s gone!”

Her mind raced. She had no clue what tower the ghost was talking about, but it was obvious it held some importance to it. What would Danny do with this information? Well that was a silly question. A ghost like this might have put up a little bit of a fight but wouldn’t stand much of a chance against him. He’d have already captured it by now.

What about her parents? Not that they’d have the information in the first place. They wouldn’t have stopped to ask questions in the first place. Dad would probably be trying (and failing) to get a shot in. Mom would probably be doing the same (with more success), but she’d also be working out a plan to capture it for future study or something.

Sam and Tucker? She wasn’t as sure with them. Tucker might try and log in to the security system and trigger the defense system. Sam, for as much as she preached non-violence, would not be hesitating to throw herself into the fight, probably following Danny’s lead.

None of these were options for her. She didn’t have the skill sets of her friends and family. She should know this by now; experience had shown time and time again that she was not exactly cut out for field work. Sure, she’d learned to aim a thermos, and she could fire a bazooka in a pinch, but this was never her forte. She much preferred to stay behind the scenes and provide team support.

Think, Jazz! Another gust of wind blew over her, still lying on the floor, and she had to roll out of the way of the coffee table approaching her. You don’t have their skills, but you have your own! What can you do?

Her main asset was her brain. That was a given. She knew she had a knack for analyzing things and digging to get at the root of the issue. That’s why she loved psychology so much - she loved to pick at people’s brains and figure out why they did the things they did, not just what they did. She could attack a problem better if she knew the underlying reasons for the problem in the first place.

Okay. So. Analyze this situation. To her, it seemed extraordinarily obvious: the ghost was upset because this tower it referred to was ‘gone’ in whatever sense that meant. It could be easily concluded that this tower held a lot of importance to this ghost. Losing something important could lead to extreme emotional duress, especially for people with anxieties or similar disorders.

Except ghosts weren’t necessarily bound to the same rules of psychology as humans. Danny was a prime example of that. But surely, being the souls of the deceased, at least some of the same rules passed over too.

Right?

Throwing all her weight to the side, she managed to roll onto her stomach and prop herself up on her arms. “Can you tell me about it?” she asked, doing her best to ignore the sting of the wind on her face.

The ghost’s eyes faded into the fog of its body and faded back in. They still leaked purple into its form. “T-tell you… about th-the tower?” it whimpered. Its voice was also difficult to hear over the roar.

Jazz nodded. “I want to hear about it,” she hollered, wanting to make sure the ghost heard her. “I’ve never heard of it before.”

The ghost hiccuped (how that was possible for a being without a diaphragm, she didn’t know). “B-but it’s gone…” it repeated. “I broke it…”

If Jazz had ears, they would’ve perked up. Of course! The ghost had said something similar before, hadn’t it? Granted, it had phrased it as “hurt it,” but the meaning had to be the same.

It all made sense! If this tower held such a special place in the ghost’s heart - er, core - and it had inadvertently destroyed it, then no wonder it was having such a difficult time. She wondered if the ghost even realized it was setting off the tornado-strength winds. It seemed horribly distracted by its distress.

So, distract? That could work temporarily, but not necessarily long term, and then they’d both be stuck in this same boat. Try and rationalize with it? Also a possibility, but it did not seem to be keen on listening to reason at the moment.

It needed something else to focus on, but it needed to be constructive. It needed to be something that could serve as a more permanent fix. A coping mechanism, but maybe one that could be used in future situations as well. Perhaps something that utilized its wind abilities, since they seemed to be so closely tied to the ghost.

The idea hit her as strong as the winds.

“Did something happen for you to break it?” she asked. She couldn’t tell if she was breathless because she was excited or because the gale stole her breath away.

It hiccuped again. “I-I didn’t want to,” it said. “I pointed… a-and it broke! I-I hurt it!”

Jazz nodded again. “It’s okay!” she shouted. “Sometimes we make mistakes. I make them too, and I break things I like too!” She absently wondered if this ghost was newer and not yet in control of its powers. The notion that it didn’t realize it was causing the wind was gaining validity.

“Y-you break?” the ghost asked. Was that an actual dip in the wind speed, or was she just imagining it?

Focus on the patient at hand. A psychologist can’t have her attention divided. “Yes! I break things sometimes!” She put her hand over her chest, but she made sure to position it where Danny had shown her a ghost’s core was (at least she hoped she was remembering right). Meet the patient where it’s at. “And it makes me break in here too!”

That caught the ghost’s attention. This time, the dip in the winds was noticeable. She took advantage of the opportunity to push herself up further.

“I-it broke…” the ghost whimpered. “A-and I broke…”

“I know,” Jazz said gently, still taking care to make sure her voice carried. “It’s okay. It’s okay for things to break. And it’s okay if we break, too.”

The ghost’s eyes faded in and out of its body again (possibly its method of blinking?), and the winds died down a little more. “But breaking… it’s bad!”

“No, breaking isn’t bad on its own. But we can’t just leave things broken, right?”

It shook its amorphous head. “N-no…” it said. “That’s bad…”

The books and papers slowly drifted down to the ground, and the curtains slowed to a flutter. “Not bad, just… incomplete,” Jazz reassured, offering a kind smile as she staggered to her feet. In the back of her head, she lamented about how tangled her long hair probably was after the whole ordeal. “It’s okay. We can make it right, but first, I need you to help me. Then I’ll be able to help you fix things, okay? We’ll fix you.” That last sentence wasn’t a phrase she was normally okay with using - all of her books told her that telling patients they needed “fixed” only made things worse - but this ghost seemed to have a limited vocabulary to some degree.

“Fix the tower?”

She hesitated. “How about we start with something smaller first?” she asked, trying to reach a compromise. She still didn’t know what this tower even was; she had no clue if it could even be fixed in the first place. She didn’t want to make a promise she couldn’t keep.

The ghost’s eyes shone from the reflection of its ectoplasmic tears and the slightest glimmer of hope. “We’ll go fix it?”

“Absolutely. And I’ll be with you the whole time.” She chanced taking a few cautious steps towards the ghost. Her hands were folded behind her back; she was pretty sure she remembered Danny mentioning something about the motion being a universal sign of submission and peaceful intention for ghosts, especially since many of the more offensive powers needed use of the hands to work. “Do you want to see?”

It eyed her warily. She could practically see the gears turning in its head as it processed what she said.

Finally, as the last of the winds died down, it extended a foggy hand towards her. “Take me?” it asked as if it were a small child and she was its mother.

Smiling, she took the ghost’s hand.

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temper (v.): (1) to moderate or mitigate; (2) to soften or tone down

#danny phantom #dannymay #dannymay2023 #dannymay 2023 #danny phantom jazz #jazz fenton #danny phantom fanfic #hannah writes

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flokali · 1 year

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seen ur hsr charas and there's only one thing in my mind....

h-how u got all of the mats?? 🗿🗿

(i mean yea, there's "ways")

oooohhhhh but prob just good management of the trailblaze power/fuels or r they just leveled up? (i meant the others,,, (⁠*⁠´⁠ω⁠｀⁠*⁠) ) like genuinely curious fufu

Hello, hello~

To be completely honest, the main reason I’ve been able to advance in the game so fast is because I’ve been sick and resting - so no class nor work for me - which means I’ve had a lot of time to do nothing other than playing. It’s partially why I’ve been able to reach lvl 36 in under a week, compared to Genshin where it took me almost twice the time to do so;;

When it comes to mats, I’ve set up a bit of a system for myself!

UTC because it got… really, really long - I did not think this game would have me this excited, alas here we are - almost 760 words of me just rambling about it…

I try getting exactly what I need rather than grinding and hoarding as many mats for the future; if I need, let’s say, 3 character ascension materials then I’ll set the rewards to get me exactly 3 mats!

Since I’m at Equilibrium lvl 2 and only have until lvl 3 to set, I know I’ll be getting 2-3 drops per round, so I’ll set it to use exactly the needed amount of Trailblaze Powder so as to not waste it.

I’ve also used up a lot, and I mean a lot, of the Trailblaze Fuel, which means I haven’t had to wait as much time to have the Trailblaze Powder filled up again.

Then there’s the local shops for each location, you have them in Herta’s Space Station, Jarilo-IV, and the Xianzhou Luofu! They use unique world currency that you have to get via quests and progressing through the story, but they have a lot of materials for both Light Cones and Character Ascension! There’s also the rewards you get from spending a certain amount in each shop where they give you Stellar Jade, Wrap Tickets, and other materials.

Another pretty good way to level up your characters fast is to claim the Level up rewards Pom-Pom gives, some of the drops are Trailblaze Fuel, Travel Guide, Adventure Logs, Refined Aether, Condensed Aether, Wrap Tickets, etc.

Then there’s the classic Embers Exchange (the little blue things you get from the Wraps), where you’ll get Trace and Light Cone ascension materials from 4-12 Embers, this resets each month so you have plenty of time to get them!

Other than that, I tend to work on all the characters at once when it comes to leveling them up and ascending them; I don’t prioritize my main team from the others, though I tend to treat my favorite characters a little better, I don’t know if that has helped me much but I thought I might add it? I do tend to try and always have all my characters at a certain ATK and ascension level - mostly because the game relies a lot on having different characters with different paths and elements. I kind of, just click add and see if I have enough for them to reach the next level, lol.

I do tend to neglect Relics a lot, mostly since I can’t really get the five star sets yet and I’d rather wait until I can get my hands on the good stuff than waste my resources on something that I’ll be replacing, so I can’t give much advice for them (T^T);; I tend to mostly use the ones I get from chests and completing quests/missions but it’s worked quite well so far!

These are all my tips and reminders for material compiled into a list:

1) Don’t hoard yet! Try getting only what you need, that way you’ll save Trailblaze Powder and grind for different materials.

2) World Shops are your best friends, they’re a quick way to get your hands on materials and give you rewards the more you spend on them.

3) Don’t be too afraid of using your Trailblaze Fuel, it’s there for you to use!

4) Some characters are easier to grind for, some are harder - some use the same materials as others, some will be the only character that needs a certain material: make a mental (or physical) list of characters that have similar materials and choose who to level up first and if you’ll grind for both of them or not.

5) Learn to prioritize what talents/cones/characters you want, even with all of what I’ve said; there will be times a character will be slightly behind, that’s okay - just focus on having fun and on the ones you’ll use the most.

6) Do both the Simulated Universe and Hall of Echos, if I had to pick one I’d recommend Herta’s SU since it gives weekly rewards for points and hands out EXP and materials as well, it also doesn’t use Trailblaze Power so you’re free to do it as many times as you wish.

7) The game is incredibly generous, it’s not afraid to give you materials the more you progress in the story and levels.

Hope this helps;; it’s kind of (very) long but I racked my brain to give as many tips as possible!

#๋࣭. priestess preaches #๋࣭. hidden devotee #๋࣭. tips!#i… realized i trailed off and started rambling about god knows what but hopefully this helped?#i play mostly on instinct - i don’t really plan out much other than just having fun in the moment - which leads to me either having:#a) really good characters or b) whatever the fuck my genshin main team is

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ahiddenpath · 1 year

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Life Update

Life chatter beneath the cut.

You know, I'm not really sure what to say, lol!

I've been at my job for about 6 months now, but it continues to be a huge adjustment. I'm still learning stuff every day. Recently, my boss took me off 100% new stuff to have me do cloning- you know, that skill I have 10 years' experience with. I asked my husband, "Do you think I failed? They said I didn't do the other project fast enough, but I have to keep begging people I don't know to train me when they are just as busy as I am." He said that they failed me and are finally correcting their mistake. I think he's probably right, but it's hard to convince my anxiety brain. But yeah- I need to beg protocols and training and supplies, etc. Of course it's taking me longer???

Meanwhile, my company has hired more people than we can fit. We have to share bench space, and we're constantly waiting for access to the instruments we need. I've started logging whenever I lose time to this, so I have something to point to when I'm told I'm not doing things fast enough. There isn't enough parking. There aren't enough desks to work at. I suggested a policy of everyone working from home at least one day per week, so that hopefully on average, there are 20% fewer people onsite each day. I... do not think this will be implemented, lmao, but like...

I don't know what we're supposed to do? It's the most unreasonable thing I've ever seen, as far as work environments go.

I don't see a future at this company, but I need to stay there for a year- otherwise, I need to pay back my sign on bonus, which of course was taxed on upon receipt (so I would owe them like 40% that I never actually received). The good news is that I am voraciously learning, and I am improving and feeling less lost and overwhelmed. I also have great coworkers across the board, I'm so impressed by that. Everyone is so smart, although I have no clue who keeps pushing to hire far more people than the building can support.

I'd comment on my personal life, but as I've mentioned before, I feel like I don't really have one anymore. I get home around 6 PM and have about 2 hours of "still able to think and function" before my brain shuts down, and I do that over and over. I struggle to emotionally regulate when things are particularly unreasonable at work (spend the whole day unable to use the instrument I was counting on, don't have a desk or lab bench, etc). I recently pushed myself to start exercising again, but that's... It's really difficult to stick with. I've also been trying to get out more, but then I end up feeling like I'm losing all of my creative time. But if all I ever do is work, I have less to tap into, creatively, so my creative time is less productive/fulfilling.

Basically, I'm struggling to find that balance spot, as so many Americans do. I'm keeping it together, though, more or less. ("Don't worry, I'm not having a breakdown, I promise," doesn't feel very encouraging, does it, lmao?! And yet, it's kind of the default American situation, unless in fact you ARE having a breakdown).

So like- I feel like this sounds gloomy, and I apologize for that. I haven't been as active on Tumblr, and this would be why. I hope you're all hanging in there, though, and I'm wishing the best for you. Big kiss!

#hidden's life

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wilchur · 6 months

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*slides into you inbox* why hello there. I come bearing Tav qotd questions for the lovely Ezra <3

2 + 3 + 4 + 9 + 11

(xx - @zoneofsmites)

questions from Tav QOTD

wowza you gave me a lot to work with ily. this is going to be SO long agdjdkdk

2. What would their blood taste like to vampires?

So my headcanon is that because Ezra is a quasi-deity in his own right and just doesn't know it, his blood hits like chugging down pure ethanol. Maybe it doesn't necessarily burn a vampire's throat, but that shit is strong. Has less taste more pure, raw energy.

3. How would they kiss their LI?

Which one 😂 Because the answer differs. With Shadowheart he keeps things gentle, innocent because she gives him the worst Urge-induced intrusive thoughts and he's worried about losing control of himself and hurting her if things get too heated. Astarion he pretty much only ever kissed during the time when they were still sleeping together (they have a convoluted queerplatonic relationship past act 2 that is too complicated to explain here lol) and it was all bloodied lips and hunger back then. He was not that worried about hurting him because he believes Astarion to be able to go toe to toe with him pretty well and it's hard to worry about being a danger to someone who has their fangs in the vicinity of your throat. There's also Gortash, but with him things were different because he understood the nature of the Urge in a way no one post-tadpole has been able to wrap their heads around. They've known each other for a decade before Ezra got shanked by Orin and both of them knew how far they could push things back then. I think its safe to say there were sparsely ways in which they haven't kissed, but if he remembered it Ezra would probably say (in his head, never aloud) that the soft, most guilt-heavy kisses stolen whenever the opportunity for a peck on the lips presented itself, were his favourite.

4. How do they sleep with their LI (what position, does one steal the blankets, is one too hot/cold, etc)?

Ezra rarely ever sleeps during the events of the game for obvious reasons and when he does it's usually a case of him passing out the moment he sits down somewhat comfortably. You would often find him seated on the ground, Shadowheart on a log above him with her hand in his hair, while he naps slumped against her legs because he had fallen asleep while listening to the party talk. It's the only time he'd dare to close his eyes around her. However post-game, more or less free of the fear that kept him awake, I see him as a massive cuddler. Big spoon with no need to hoard the blankets because he is the blanket and Shadowheart's personal heater. With Astarion I don't think he's even aware they've ever shared a bedroll because that was something Astarion kept to himself, Ezra most of the time passed out from bloodloss because again, weird situationship. But post-game whenever they're on an adventure or share a bed back home, the deal is the same as with Shadowheart -- big spoon and heater. As for Gortash... I really don't think Ezra's overwhelming sense of guilt ever let him stay underneath his silk sheets after sex. He might've lingered a few times when explicitly told to or by accident, but there was no cuddling involved and unless he passed out, he wouldn't have slept a wink the entire night.

9. If they had to be put in a “get along shirt” with a companion, who would it be?

Ughh he's such a people-pleaser this question is honestly really hard to answer. But if he had to, I think it would be Lae'zel. Especially in act 2 and 3 when he seems to be straying further towards losing himself and that costs him a great chunk of her respect. But that's still more her being put into the shirt with him, not the other way around. He cares a lot about them all and any animosity is more likely to come from the opposite side.

11. What are their thoughts on clowns?

He thinks other people's strange and very strong dislike of clowns is the only funny thing about them, finds them stupid and unamusing himself, but considers a clown performance less about the performer and more about the company you bring to it. He enjoys going to the circus with people he can make fun of the entire thing with a great deal.

#bg3 #the dark urge #bg3 oc #bg3:ezra #tav qotd

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stormblessed95 · 2 years

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Hey Stormy! Random question incoming: I have always wondered about the back end of Tumblr since I don’t post or accept asks. 1.)When you block an anon, are you blocking their account, their device or their IP address? If it’s the IP address you’re blocking then wouldn’t they be able to just change locations (like leave their home) and be able to see your posts again? 2.)Do you have stats like Twitter where you can see the impressions of your posts? 3.)Do you get more options unlocked when you reach a certain number of followers kinda like instagram influencer accounts? 4.)How are some seemingly big accounts limited to a certain number of images per post while for others it seems like they can post unlimited images/videos on one post? 5.)What’s a feature(s) that you would love tumblr to implement to make your experience 10 times better? What’s an existing tumblr feature(s) that you want abolished for better user experience? Just breaking up the recent annoying jkkr anon asks with some random tumblr questions lol.

Hi! 1) Blocking a tumblr regularly means you block their account. Blocking from anon in your inbox means you block their IP address. So yes, in BOTH cases, the person blocked could get around the blocking by going somewhere else. Logging into a different account or see my posts simply by googling me and not logging in at all. Lol but it adds a major level of inconvenience for them to do so and then I can just block again if they send anything else. This is what the anon options look like in my inbox other than just "answer."

2) Nope!

3) also no

4) I think @wingzie or someone tried to explain this to me a while ago. But I got confused. It has something to do with settings somewhere I think? Idk lol tumblr still confuses me sometimes and I work mostly off the mobile app which probably makes it harder lol

5) Let me embed more links, images and videos. Give me more color font options. Formatting things easier would be nice. Give me a better search function and a way to search through my posts to find things easier PLEASE

6) I have no idea! The limits put on posts would be nice going away i guess, similar to my answer for 5. Lol

Thanks for the asks!! ❤️❤️❤️

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cocogrrrl · 10 months

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HI IM BACJ SORRY

It was such a weird dream omg so it happened after I woke up randomly at like 10am and went back to sleep til 11am (it was a weekend LOL) but I was in a dream going to sleep and so in dream 1 I felt my body like leaving my body while falling into dream 2??? It was wild. And then I flew n stuff HAHA but then I woke up again in dream 1 which was insane

I’m still not able to lucid dream regularly yet unfortunately :( but tips would be to do a dream journal where u log all the dreams + wake up while ur in REM sleep (so like 5-6+ hrs after u fall asleep) and walk around then go back to bed thinking ur gonna lucid dream

THE KYLE DESIGN IN THE KYMAN COMIC NEEDS ITS OWN AWARD LIKE I WANT IT FRAMEDDDDDDDDD also u can be honest if u like kyman………… if u were reading the fic that much to know……. /jokes xoxo

HEHEHEHEHEHE EEEEEEEE ME TOO THATS ME WHENEVER I SEE U UPDATE!!!!!!!! I am suddenly Megurine Luka.

-💫 anon

I THINK I GET THAT... like ur body sudden feels like its falling n all???AND YOURE JUST LIKE "WHATS HAPPNENING..." 😭 but that's crazy!! like u went to one dream to another then back to the original one????

i hope u master lucid dreaming!! id love to hear the stuff u get urself into :D ALSO THANKIE 4 THE TIPS i will follow them . soon

what eef the kyman shippers were the friends we made along the way........... /j

LITERALLY U BTW

#cocogrrrl talks!#💫 anon #sweetumssszzz!!!

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nottoonedin · 2 years

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Idea 1: Vanessa quits her job

This idea is based on my interpretation that the Vanessa we see in Security Breach isn't really her; it's Vanny controlling her. Vanessa's consciousness is there, but all that she can do is just watch, like viewing your own life through an old television.

So after the 3-star ending, Vanessa would be left with a job that requires skills that "she" technically never had. She can't just pull up Vannys memories (which i have her being able to do because extra pain :D) because there are no memories of how to do that job, a final "f*ck you :D" to Vanessa from Vanny before she left.

(I feel this needs a bit more of an explanation. Vanny had an instinctive knowledge of how to use any electronic device, courtesy of Glitchtrap/Afton. This meant that she never had to read any instructions for any of the surveilance equipment that she used on the job. She also never looked down at keyboards when she typed the passwords needed to access the security computers sinceVanny had all the passwords to herself. All this means is that when Vanessa looks back at these memories, they are effectively useless.)

So now all Vanessa has left are her own memories of watching herself push random buttons that do random things. It would be like trying to learn how to fly a plane solely by watching someone else do it.

Vanessa also realizes that she'd have to still assist lost children after hours, a thought that truly scares her. It's not because she doesn't like children, no. In fact, I believe Vanessa used to work really well with children due to her former position as a video game tester/coder. This might not make much sense, but is elaborated upon in idea 2.

It is also stated in the game in one of the logs that you can find that she was not recommended for a position as a security guard, so it just makes sense for her to leave afer being freed.

So she would put in her 2 weeks notice, but not before working out some special deal with the plex that allows her and Greg the gremlin of chaos to visit the pizzaplex whenever they want and for any length of time.

As for what job she would try to go back to? It would be her old job of beta testing and coding. She was evidently very good at it based on those cut AR emails. It might sound like tempting fate, but I think that Vanessa would be a heck of a lot more careful this time if she was put back on the VR project. That assumes that the project is still even active.

That way she can make sure that what happened to her, never happens to anyone again.

Ooo this is super interesting!! I'm kinda tired so idk if I'm reading it properly but I like the idea that Vanny and Vanessa kinda have separate but same mind and that they share memories (even if it's kinda hard to lol)

Can't wait to read the other ideas!

#ask #answered ask #thanks for the ask!#fnaf

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luciusspriggss · 1 year

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i am writing this because i lit dont feel comfortable with talking to anyone with what is going on with me right now, so this is just a vent post to get off my chest

I just wrote like 10 paragraphs detailing the last year with, and ultimate reasons why my ex, Jes, and I broke up two days ago. It was a lot. Nobody needs to hear that shit. Yeah, Jes was awful to me, (unintentionally) gaslit me for a year (it wasn't their fault), neglected me, was mean to me while they were drunk, and overall a shitty selfish person for the past couple months, but I get it. I know why. Doesnt excuse their behavior. I told them what they were doing and who they were becoming so it wouldn't happen again. I just, don't want to deal with that right now.

We have grown since getting together 3 1/2 years ago. Jes is now able to trust people, process their emotions, and be there for people (except for me lol). Jes has finally discovered who they are, what they want, and how they want to continue growing. We still love each other, but neither of us are the people we fell in love with.

I am unmasking and realizing just how much I mask and put other peoples needs above mine. I still want to be a good person and do good. I am realizing though that I keep ending up in relationships (romantic, platonic, whatever) where people get mad at me for things I can't control. I am willing to do things I am uncomfortable with, given I have enough time to mentally prepare. But I also deserve to have someone who wants to do things I want to do too.

I like staying at home. I like doing my own thing. I like to binge watch tv/movies/media, read, create, relax, and have a routine. I also like to occasionally go out to the woods to make sure I can still properly identify trees, go to bookstores, craft stores, go out to fuck off no where and try to identify as many flowers as I can using my Jepson, and if able (which i am not right now) do yardwork. I love cutting logs with an axe and then splitting the wood for firewood/kindling. I love creating/rehabilitating existing trails. I love weed-eating. I love ensuring a property is wildfire safe by making proper buffers and removing ladder fuels. I don't need someone to do all those things with me (I actually kind of prefer to do yard work alone but am open to help), but it would be nice to meet someone who is down to do SOMETHING with me that I enjoy.

I need to figure out what I want and allow myself to do those things without caring what people think of me. The only place I am truly myself is on Tumblr, and that makes me very sad. I mean, I am happy for tumblr. I hate that I chose to focus on a relationship instead of doing something that actually makes me feel better.

I'm so happy now that there is no pressure me to do things that are an actual nightmare for me (like going out to bars all the time). I felt so frustrated because I would TRY. I put so much energy into being able to not have a meltdown, and tried my best to be as social as I could, and it wasn't enough. When I would try to do what I wanted to do in a bar (sit in a corner and people watch or play pool) I would still get told that I make them "uncomfortable" because they know "I don't actually want to be there". I am trying 😭. It was a no-win for me. I stay home and I am "unsocial and not doing the things they want to do". I do go and try to have fun and am told "you dont really want to be here. you arent social enough. i am uncomfortable when I am around you. I don't want to have to worry if you are okay or not when I am not around you". ))))): I don't understand. The worst is when I am told "you were more fun when you would get drunk before". I was EXACTLY the same way, they just couldn't read me before. I was quiet then and I am quiet now (unless a fun interesting conversation comes up I feel I can take part of). They even agreed to let me leave if I started getting over stimulated. If Jes and my roommate were having a party or bbq, I was told that I could go to my room when my battery was out. They told me they were happy I was trying to hang out with them. And then later get mad at me for not being social enough.

Okay this is turning into a rant, I'm sorry. Point is, I want to be with someone who actually is okay with me being the person I am. Stop trying to change me all the time. I need to figure out how to put my foot down and ensure my needs and desires are not neglected (i suppose i sort of did when Jes and I broke up).

I LIKE believing in more fantastical things, having a positive outlook, seeing the good in people, having fun, being the person I actually am. I'm tired of people giving me "reality checks". If I want to learn about werewolves, vampires, and pirates, let me! It's fun! Stop telling me it is all bullshit and there is no point in trying to learn about it 😭. I love the idea that people can find true love with others (any kind of love for any kind of relationship) and people constantly keep telling me there is no point, people are people, "true love" doesnt exist. I think it exists! Stop making me feel bad because we don't see things the same way. I don't care if others view something differently from me! Life is joyous and I want to know how other people think and function. I think it is fascinating. There is nothing wrong with me seeing the world the way I do ):

It is going to be tough mourning the relationship, that was the most healthy relationship I have ever had, but I am excited and hopeful. I get to find out who I truly am now. Unmasked. I am grateful for that. And I am talking to my therapist later today so I get to do some serious processing and reflecting (:

Life is good (I mean it is god awful, i hate myself and i am struggling in almost every aspect of my life). But it IS good. I WILL be okay.

#😤

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sonasnowdrop · 2 years

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Idea 1: Vanessa quits her job

It is also stated in the game in one of the logs that you can find that she was not recommended for a position as a security guard, so it just makes sense for her to leave afer being freed.

That way she can make sure that what happened to her, never happens to anyone again.

OOOO!! This is really good I love it, especially the ending part!! Sorry if this took me a while to read and respond to lol

#ask #fav #sonasks #ideas

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sharpmarble76 · 2 years

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Idea 1: Vanessa quits her job

It is also stated in the game in one of the logs that you can find that she was not recommended for a position as a security guard, so it just makes sense for her to leave afer being freed.

That way she can make sure that what happened to her, never happens to anyone again.

This is so well thought out! I'm really impressed!

Vanny knowing all of the passwords and being efficient with technology makes sense since she is basically a living murder-glitch-thing.

Being able to see all of Vanny's memories since they are technically also hers makes sense as well because as you said, she is basically just a backseat rider.

Even if she did have the skills needed to be a security guard, I'm sure she would quit as it would be really traumatic to watch yourself murder children. And having Vanessa really enjoy being around kids would just add to the trauma.

I like that she pulled strings for her and Gregory too, that way they can visit Freddy. (I'm guessing they had him get repaired so he's not just a head lol)

Having Vanessa got back to beta testing is not something I would have guessed because of everything that happened with Vanny but it makes sense as well. Vanessa doing it so no one else will have to is really heroic. And she also has experience with the whole possession thing so she probably knows the signs now.

With luck, the VR project is inactive but knowing Fazbear, they don't care how many murders there are as long as the money keeps rolling in. Maybe she can make a request to not do vr if they want her to do it again.

I can't wait to get through the rest of your head cannons/theories! Like I said at the beginning, this is so well thought out and everything makes sense. Thanks for asking!!

#asks #fnaf

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gooeyslime · 2 years

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Idea 1: Vanessa quits her job

It is also stated in the game in one of the logs that you can find that she was not recommended for a position as a security guard, so it just makes sense for her to leave afer being freed.

That way she can make sure that what happened to her, never happens to anyone again.

Oh yeah, I agree that she would quit since she's not qualified for it but also just for the horrible memories she would have from her time under Afton's influence... Also the idea of her being conscious during her time as Vanny while being unable to control her own body is absolutely terrifying, like her realising what Afton's plan is but being unable to stop herself from killing no matter what she does...

Her going back to the VR game to make sure nobody ends up like her or Jeremy is also a nice touch, if that game is still under development it would make sense for Afton/Glitchtrap to keep part of itself in there as a failsafe in case Vanessa messes up the plan/frees herself/etc.

Also glad Gregory gets to terrorise the animatronics whenever he wants lol

#ask #halogenrobotics #fnaf #fnaf sb #vanessa fnaf #vanny fnaf #gregory fnaf

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lavenderr-starrs · 2 years

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Idea 1: Vanessa quits her job

It is also stated in the game in one of the logs that you can find that she was not recommended for a position as a security guard, so it just makes sense for her to leave afer being freed.

That way she can make sure that what happened to her, never happens to anyone again.

Ok I like this, I always like the idea that Vanny and Vanessa are the same person, with Vanny being an Ego of Glitchtrap/afton, because afton has done stuff like this before this is technically his company so if Vanny is like an extension of afton she’d know how to handle his creations in a way + the fact his now just a bundle of code, all the modern electronics are easier for him to understand despite being an old geezer lolol

despite some of the endings like the one where vanny is pushed of the roof and we see Vanessa at the top of the burning building it never really made much sense to me lol

Also As she should honestly I like this little Vanessa redemption as she should, as she should ☺️👍

#ask thingy #fnaf #fnaf security breach #vanessa security breach #fnaf vanny

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ghostthefox1997 · 2 years

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Idea 1: Vanessa quits her job

So after the 3-star ending, Vanessa would be left with a job that requires skills that "she" technically never had. She can't just pull up Vannys memories (which i have her being able to do because extra pain :D) because the memories of how to do that job are suspiciously gone, almost as if they were taken by Vanny just before she "left" as a final "f*ck you :D" to Vanessa.

It is also stated in the game in one of the logs that you can find that she was not recommended for a position as a security guard, so it just makes sense for her to leave afer being freed.

That way she can make sure that what happened to her, never happens to anyone again.

Okay so a tech woman Vannessa with really good skills but now bonus trauma lol hmm wonder if she ever makes a game out of what happened in the pizzaplex

#fnaf #security breach

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cisthehuman · 2 months

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Tooth Hiatus evolved into I'm Broke Hiatus

This week, I originally planned to start streaming again. Buuuuuuut...

My work performance is kinda not great. Ever since my tooth surgery my sleep schedule has been shot and while I haven't gotten too bad at work. My brain is not where it needs to be. So, I have to be extra responsible and focus on my job for a little bit.

This pains me, as I really like streaming and I want to grow! I had a goal to possibly hit affiliate on twitch by my birthday in July and I wanted to work as hard as I can do so! I still have time, but you know....I'm eager to get started!!!!

But money has been tight after paying off my tooth surgery bills and I still have medical bills from last year/this year for my PCOS diagnosis that I need to cover...so I need to focus on work.

With that being said, I'll still work on things behind the scenes! It's time for.....CisLunar Updates!!!!!

Update 1: Music Previews!!

1A--I've got previews made for Cosmic Canary Radio (the stream music) volumes 1-3 done! Take a gander at all of them! I'm actually going to link to the previews on twitter as I'm afraid of how heavy this post is LOL

Cosmic Canary Radio Vol 1

Cosmic Canary Radio Vol 2

Cosmic Canary Radio Vol 3

1B--Artist Albums are close to coming out!

There are 4 Albums by different artists in Lunar's world that are ready to get out into the world. To world build, I thought it would be fun to make up artists and make little albums for them. Now I'm not great with music, so please have some grace lol But I'm kinda proud of them! I've held this close to my chest for a while so I'll go ahead and say the name of the artist and their corresponding album along with the genre! Also enjoy a little snippet!

Hoshi*ga*Hoshii: The Sun Glares at You

Genre: Space hop

Mori: My Forest

Genre: genuinely i'm unsure what to call this genre....experimental? Forest hop? Experimental jazz/classical?

Infinity: Inorganic in Organic

Genre: Avant pop, indie electronic, they're heavily inspired by the band Stereolab.

Siren: *Title Pending*

Genre: Alternative rock, pop rock, they're based off of Coldplay's sound

Of course, one artist, BATTY, already has 2 albums already ready for you to listen to!

BATTY!: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YByE09cEZpM

Transylvania: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rbe77vSKoyI

Update 2: Thumbnails!!

I've been loosely reading posts I find in how to gain more viewers to streams and one suggestion that I liked was making thumbnails! So I made some for the upcoming games!

Now you know what are vibes are when I come back~ Also I like that I made Lunar different sizes in each one, that's fun lolol I'm just now noticing that.

Update 3: Lunar's New Expressions!

I was able to commission the artist that made the Lunar pngtuber, marchemis, some new expressions for Lunar!! I gave a little sketch for each! Sketching this was really fun.

Finally Lunar can be mad when I am mad lolol

Update 4: Compiling Art for future DevLogs~

Today I've been mentally thinking of a list of topics for dev logs. A couple are Cis the Parasite Design process, Champs Design process, and more! Here's a couple of pictures I've been compiling for these!

There are more, but they're not saved as pngs yet and/or theyre in my sketchbook/random pieces of paper.

Update 5: New Lunar Illustration and 2nd Outfit Planning

I've been slowly tinkering away at a new illustration for Lunar in celebration of spring! I'm changing up my coloring style a bit which is why it's taking me longer than usual (and also I'm hooked on Pixel Cafe, but that's neither here nor there). Take a gander!

Lunar is also going to get a new outfit soon! And while I drew up several last year, it's actually going to look similar to this! There might be some changes but it'll be very very similar to this!

The artist I commissioned before, marchemis, had another round of commissions open, but I didn't have the funds nor an idea for a second outfit for Lunar! A goal for next time is to save enough for up for it!

Listing this out like this, I'm like actually working. I did more than I thought I have lolol The one thing I haven't worked on is the script for the kinetic story. I'll make plans to work on that in the coming weeks.

I'm actually planning on buying Spirit City! It's a coworking game! If I'm lucky and it works on my old school set up! Maybe I can just stream me working on stream stuff for a while! But I'll let you know if things work!

Anyway! Thanks for your understanding for all of the hiatuses. Things aren't tough, but they are tedious. And as this month isn't the best for me mentally, I will do my best to power through! So if you see me streaming randomly during this hiatus, come on by!

See you in the next one~

#cis rambles #black artists on tumblr #digital art #black artist #original music #oc art #small streamer #digital artist #twitch streamer #pngtuber

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