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spooky-all-year-round · 9 months

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Hips

NSFW! Seventh year 19!Garreth x plus size female Gryffindor 18!Reader

I know everyone swears that Garreth is a butt guy, and I'm not here to argue it! But I have a head cannon that he is obsessed with wide hips. He doesn't know why, but they make his brain go brrrr. So once he notices how big your hips have gotten, he can't help but delve into fantasies about you. Also with his family having a history/reputation of having lots of kids I imagine they produce a lot of cum. Characters are 18+!

TW: NSFW, the tiniest hint of fluff, hip fetish, breeding kink, pining, masterbation, thick thighs fetish, thighs biting (imagined), height difference, slightly possessive!Garreth, thoughts of sex, with-holding an orgasm, lots of cum, multiple positions (imagined), mating press (imagined), p in v sex (imagined), oral sex both sides receiving (imagined), deep throating (imagined), small amount of praise

Garreth had thought you were pretty since the moment he saw you. Quickly as he got to know you, you became beautiful to him. Your laugh, the way you looked at him, the way you talked about your hobbies, hell the way you walked became beautiful to him. But he realized his feelings were more intense on the day of your 18th birthday.

It wasn't like you hadn't hugged him before, you had hugged him plenty of times. But this time he noticed a few new things. Things he started paying attention to more after that hug. The hug was innocent enough, but he must have grown a few more inches over the holiday. Because he had to lower his arms to prevent from hugging around your chest, moving them so they rested around your waist. Days later, in potions class he went to grab your waist to pull you away from his couldron that was about to explode. But he over shot his hands and instead of your waist they landed on your hips, and that's when he was suddenly very aware how wide your hips had gotten. They were plush and soft under his hands.

His brain went blank. His first thought was how he could get the chance to grab them again. The thought hit him so suddenly that he frozen for a few seconds, a blush painted his face so fast it was like you threw a bucket of paint on it. He still hadn't taken his hands off your hips as sharp told him off and gave him detention. It wasn't until you patted his hands and said "I think I'm safe now Gar." You had turned your head to smile up at him. Merlin, he swears there had never been a smile as beautiful as yours.

His hands jumped away from your hips but hovered there. "Well if you were a bit quicker I wouldn't have to play the knight to your damsel in distress." He grinned and gave a nervous laugh, letting you know he was only playing. His mind was half stuck on wanting to touch your hips again. He wanted to pull you in by those soft hips and kiss you until you both couldn't breath.

You turned towards him with a grin, "Maybe if you stopped blowing up half the class I wouldn't need to be saved from you 'Sir Garreth'. You're more like the dragon in the story." You giggled and pushed his shoulder gently before returning to your couldron to inspect the damage. What you didn't know was that even though you meant Sir like a knight, he heard it as Sir like he was in charge, and that rattled around in his brain. He was thinking of all the scenarios where you could call him that in not so innocent situations. What was happening to him? Sure you had always been attractive, he's had a crush on you forever. But this was a new level of intensity that he never had before. He wandered over to his cauldron hoping that cleaning up his mess and focusing on trying not to ruin your potion again would clear his mind.

Unfortunately when he went to crouch down and clean the spill on the floor he noticed your thighs. They were so thick, and he imagined they would be so soft. Maybe he could ask to lay his head in your lap later. He could stare up at you and maybe you'd play with his hair. But his thoughts quickly switch to what it would be like between your thighs. Nibbling and sucking on them, leaving his claim all over you with hickies. The idea of you walking around with his marks on you made his head spin. He could slowly make his way up until he got to your dripping core. His blush reappeared at the thought. He wondered what you'd taste like there, he would happily drink every drop of your juices, even if you smothered him to death between your thighs. Oh Merlin, the idea of you sitting on his face while you dripped onto his chin as he ran his tongue on every part of your pussy it could reach, including inside. He'd make you cum as many times as you could take. He had to find a way to breath under water just so he wouldn't have to stop for air. No! No. He had to focus, his body was already starting to react to his thoughts and he couldn't imagine the embarrassment of being hard in class. Worse, you might think that he was hard over just touching your hips! He wouldn't be able to show his face to you again, let alone in this school.

He did good for the rest of the school day, you both didn't share every class together and the ones you two did share after potions you didn't sit next to him. The problem resurfaced when you were both in the common room. He, Natty, and Leander were all talking. He was on the couch Leander was sitting on the ground closer to the fire and Natty was in one of the armchairs. He didn't even see you walk over before you plopped on the couch next to him resting your legs across his lap. He became stock still, he wasn't even sure he was still breathing. He just kept staring into the fireplace and trying to think of anything else. But luck was not on his side today. You scooched down to get more comfy on the pillow behind you which ended up laying your soft plush thighs on his lap. He thanked everything in the universe that you wore thick stockings today because he doesn't think he could handle seeing your bare thighs.

But the current situation wasn't in his favor either. He wanted nothing more than to relax with his hand on your thigh, rubbing small circles with his thumb. He wanted to stay and joke around with you all just like he had done so many times before. But he couldn't ignore that he was starting to get aroused again. The earlier thoughts were coming back and with your thighs across his lap he was going crazy. "I think I'm going to head to bed!" He exclaimed, jumping out of his seat, your legs were unceremoniously tossed off his lap with his sudden movement. He rushed to the boys dormitories without another word, not even waiting to hear anything from you all, completely missing the confused look you all gave him and each other. He had to leave and take care of this now.

He practically threw open the door and closed it just as quick. Speed walking to his bed he threw the curtains open before promptly throwing them closed incasing him in darkness. He did a sealing charm and cast muffliato, he couldn't risk the slight chance one of you would send Leander to come check on him. It wasn't like he hadn't done this before, Leander and him had had a week long prank war more than once, so hopefully he would chalk it up to really wanting to sleep and to not be bothered.

He fumbled to get his trousers and underwear off. Quickly freeing his half hard cock. He spit on his hand a few times before starting to slowly stroke his cock. He let out a soft moan, he was so glad he left when he did. He was becoming hard very quickly. You for sure would have noticed if he had left even a few moments later. His earlier thoughts had floated back but they started morphing into new scenarios. He could imagine you kneeling down on the ground completely nude, himself on the edge of the bed as you sucked him off. Your pretty eyes looking up at him as you took as much of him as you could. You were using one hand for the rest that you couldn't fit and the other to play with his balls. Fuck, the idea was so hot, he would've needed all the strength in the world to not just shove his cock down your throat. He hoped you'd a good girl and take his load in your mouth before swallowing every last drop, or maybe he could cum down your throat and you'd do it instinctively. He didn't know which idea was more sexy.

Then he remembered your hips, so squishy and his eyes rolled at the thought of holding them as he fucked you. He started imagining every position he could think of. Missionary of course would be wonderful, being able to see your face and how you'd react, being able to kiss you, and full access to your chest. He could only imagine the cute little sounds you'd make as he sucked on/ played with your nipples. The the idea shifted to you riding him, watching you desperately bouncing on his cock with your hands on his chest. That would be the perfect reason to hold your hips. He could squeeze them all he'd like while helping you move faster or maybe he'd hold your hips still and fuck you from below.

He felt like he was going to come so he let go of his cock. Panting and whining he only wanted to keep going, but he didn't want it to end to soon. He laid there for a few minutes, panting and letting his body calm down a bit. It had been so long since he masterbated his body was extremely sensitive. Once he felt like he wasn't going to immediately cum he started back at the same pace he left off at.

This time he imagined your face pressed into the bed with your ass up. The thought of your pussy on display for him before he buried himself deep in you made him groan and work his hand faster. At this point his tip was slowly leaking precum all down his cock making it easier for his hand to glide up and down it. But in his mind it was your wet pussy dripping down his cock. His brain then went to a position he'd not heard of before. One where he had you on your back and was pressing your thighs as far back as they could go. You'd be spread out, making it easy for him to press as close as he could to you, and allowing him to get his cock as deep as possible. He'd make sure to rub your clit until you were meeting his thrusts, completely fucked out. Your brain only focused on cumming and having him fill you with cum. The idea of your moans in his ear with your head thrown back made him start thrusting into his own hand. His thoughts flickered to him growling in your ear about how he was going to breed you, how he was going to fuck you over and over again till your hole was filled to the brim with his cum. He could imagine you begging "Please Sir! Please cum in me! I need you to claim my pussy, fill me with your cum!" The idea of you begging him to claim you finally sent him over the edge. He let out a loud moan, tossing his head back as he started painting his stomach and chest with cum. Rope after rope, it felt like it would never end. But when it finally did he was practically covered in it. He bit his lip, he would have to keep from masturbating again so that he could fill you with this amount of cum.

He used scourgify to clean himself up, but he didn't pull his trousers back up. He didn't return to the common room. He just laid there, wondering if you had a crush on him. If you thought of kissing him. Then he wondered if you had ever gotten off thinking about him. The thought made him groan biting his lip again as he felt his cock start to get hard again. He was going to have to find somewhere else to do this, because it was going to be a long night.

Part two

#garreth weasley x reader #garreth x you #garreth weasley imagine #garreth weasley #garreth weasley smut #garreth smut

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valleyfthdolls · 26 days

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Honestly surprised you haven't, since there was a time I couldn't escape him no matter where I was before I knew about the game

Anyways, you asked for it, silly ghost owl facts go brrrr-

- Barnaby, despite his name, is not a barn owl. He's actually a long eared owl.

- Barnaby isn't his real name; he used to have a different one, back in his alive days. One of the drawings featuring him has him surrounded by many names starting with "B".

- Said illustration has "Who am I?" hidden among the names and words such as "Where" and "Help", hinting at something linked to his identity is torturing him.

- It's been stated that Barnaby is the way he is because of a dangerous experiment that corrupted then killed him, changing him completely as a result.

- Barnaby is asexual homoromantic, and is genderfluid: while he goes primarly by "he/him", he accepts any pronoun.

- He considers his Barnaboos as his "little pretties", and often offers help or advice if they need it; of course, his help may not be as helpful as he believes...

- He hates cheesecake.

- He's not a fan of rootbeer neither; he will serve it in his parties, but he personally won't drink it.

- His favorite food is eye scream, and favorite Halloween treat are caramel apples.

- As for ice cream, his favorite flavor is Strawberry Shortcake.

- Speaking of food, yeah, he doesn't need to eat, nor sleep. But still likes doing it anyway.

- Barnaby is a confirmed sleepyhead. He naps a lot, but never in an ordinary position, or in his bed; he tends to sleep in various gravity bending position, especially upside down.

- Meaning, yes, when Billie comes to steal his gem, he was sleeping!

- And when he sleeps, he apparently snores and hoots.

- While hugging him would result in a kill from him, Ash confirmed Barnaby is a hugger! Hugging him would still involve him squeezing or stabbing you to death, tho'. And he'd feel both soft and slimy to the touch.

- Barnaby is around 10-11ft tall, and with his size-shifting abilities, he can be any height he wants; when he was alive tho', he's as tall as Aristotle, more or less.

- He doesn't need glasses anymore, but sometimes will wear them because they make him look smart. They also tend to follow the eyes' movements.

- Barnaby is very emotional: while it won't stop him from trying to kill you, he will cry if he sees you cry. Ironically, he would comfort you until you feel better. Then he'll kill you.

- It's been confirmed that Barnaby's biggest fear has "already come true".

- His tears are orange, just like his eyes.

- Barnaby is not one to open his heart easily, but the moment he does, there's many ways to reach it. He's quite romantic, tho' not in the usual way: if you gave him a dead rat, he'd consider it a very romantic gesture!

- It's been stated he doesn't have a partner now, but in life, "maybe".

- When it comes to children, it's been confirmed he'd be the best caregiver alongside Dutch, althought for him "it's complicated".

- He apparently had a child of his own, if the picture posted about him during "Father's Day" is any indication. What happened to the little one hasn't been revealed yet.

- Apparently he's the least judgemental character in BBU!

- If he had a TV, it'd be old timey, and he'd watch something really random. Like ducks.

- Barnaby loves small critters; Ash specifically mentions they always linked him with guinea pigs. And indeed, Barnaby had a science guinea pig co-worker once, that turned into an actual guinea pig because of a reckless experiment, and he took care of them.

- He's able to control reality; it's unclear if it's his gem's doing, or his magic power as a ghost.

- In any case, he's now the most powerful character in the game

- Back in his alive days, he was a magic researcher and scientist.

- He actually owned the gem before he turned into a ghost. He even experimented on it, and it's suggested that actually sealed his fate.

- A lot of songs from Oingo Boingo and Lemon Demon fit him: Ash specifically mentioned "Weird Science" as really "Barnabycore"

- Barnaby is autistic: he stims by hooting and flapping his wings when he's excited.

- When he's scared or nervous, he tends to cover himself with his wings.

- Katie said that, if he were a candy, he'd be a sour blueberry.

- Barnaby lives in his own dimension, with his own mansion and everything. And he can travel between realities. Although one comment from Katie suggests he's trapped in there, but it's too early to say for sure.

- According to the devs, he was inspired by Weird Al Yankovic, Lewis from Mystery Skulls and Discord from MLP.

- No, he wasn't inspired by Snatcher, since the development of BBU has lasted longer than A Hat in Time. The two of them canonically know each other tho': only problem is, Snatcher hates Barnaby's guts and finds him too clingy, while the owl adores him.

- He canonically knows Wally Darling from "Welcome Home" and Kira from "Far Fetched" too, since he can travel between realities.

- Barnaby has his guests come to his home by portals that pop just below them. He apparently has kidnapped people before, every once in a while.

- He'd get along well with Dutch.

- It's left vague whether he knows Fantoccio or not.

- He actually has never met Arthur nor Aristotle before the game.

- In any case, he'd find Aristotle really funny, and wouldn't take them seriously.

-- Barnaby is aware of the player, and can break the 4th wall. And that's why only he can use Twitter.

- Whenever he writes on Twitter, hE WRiTSE LIkE THIS!!!

- Barnaby is REALLY mischeavous, and finds no problem in cheating in games. But if YOU cheat, then he gets ticked off.

- This suggests he's also a sore loser.

- Judging by his expression in the cutscene, he doesn't like being interrupted.

- It's been confirmed he smells like meldew. :P

- He could fake glitching out, then attack the moment you come to check out what's going on with him.

- He HATES party crashers. Also scarecrows: not good for conversations. And he's not interested in their crops.

- He can play the organ: Katie even suggested that if you hear it in the background of his chapter, that's him playing it.

- He was a young prodigy, back when he was alive!

- Don't be fooled by his goofy antics: he's very smart, still loves making experiments and can speak a lot of languages.

- Ironically, he hates skulls: he finds them icky.

- He was 25-26 when he died; he's been dead for 100+ years.

- Time is very important for him: that's why there's so many clocks in his parlor. It's been suggested he sees partying as a way to keep track with time.

- Despite that, Barnaby himself in the contest video has briefly stated he tends to forget what year it is.

- There's tons of pictures in his manor: all of them depict him, suggesting he's good at painting.

- Katie has noted that Barnaby "remembers everything". When asked if there's something he'd rather forget, they stated that "what he wants and what he needs are very different things".

- His family is "infinite", apparently. Then again, one of his very early descriptions stated he's got no friends nor family to speak about...

- He's been described as "self interested"

- When asked which character had the most trauma, without giving hints about being traumatized, Katie confirmed Barnaby as the answer, even stating his story makes them the saddest, alongside Fanto's.

- His favorite color is pink!

- He can change himself into lots of animals, and can even clone himself!

- When asked if he can talk to his alive self, Katie said it's "technically possible".

- Back when he was alive, he was noted as a dork and a hardworker, so much so he'd even pull one-nighters before making speeches for his research. Katie jokingly suggested that's why he parties so much: it's to make up for lost time!

- He had a different way of speaking, back when he was alive. And his icks were probably different as well.

- When he gets overwhelmed, he has a shutdown, and goes completely silent.

- At early stages, Barnaby was supposed to be a bug.

- The moment his design as a ghost was chosen, he went through a lot of palette options, like a pale blue color like he came from "The Haunted Mansion", or all colorful like "Dia de los Muertos". Ultimately they settled for his currently shadowy look because, not only it's easier to animate, it was in line with his backstory.

- Barnaby can melt. It's still unclear what triggers such a reaction, but some pictures hint that it's tied to his psychological state.

- Barnaby has been noted that he can talk fancy, but he's not eloquent.

- His favorite dance is the charleston!

- Ash has stated that in the game he is going to be depicted doing something similiar to "singing himself to sleep".

- Apparently he still makes pellets from his mouth. Dead or not, he's still an owl.

- He often puts emphasis on words, sometimes even making his bowtie spin.

- In the latest Twitter post featuring him, when you decode the garbled message, you can read: "Barnaby lies Along in his thoughts, Resting On the floor Neglected". Not only this hints at his turmoil, it also hides the word "BARON". It's unclear if it's his name, a title he possessed, or someone or thing else entirely connected to him.

- He loves recieving scretches on his head.

- Barnaby can cook, but he'll more often than not leave that to the Barnaboos.

- He's not that interested in gardening, even tho' he owns a greenhouse.

- He'd enjoy playing "Luigi's Mansion"!

- In Super Smash Bros. he'd main Meta Knight, even relating to him.

- He'd happily accept smoochies, apparently!

- His favorite party game is "Pin the tail on the owl".

- If you are his friend, he'd consider it even more of a reason to stay in the manor and never leave!

- He has claimed that he's used to give himself self love and compliments, since no one else does it. That, and his tendency to ask others for hugs or if they need a hug to calm down, suggests he's affection starved.

- He tends to react to compliments from fans by smiling bashfully, or happily shouting that he's popular.

- Katie stated that his favorite movie would be something unexpected, like "Marnie & Me" or "Up".

- Barnaby can see everything from the eyes of the plushies that look like him. So, if you bought one... watch out...

- Among his early designs, he also looked like a completely different owl, tall and austere looking, who was the guardian of the forest. It was changed because the devs wanted a goofy boss that could stand out among the others.

- Having said that, it seems Barnaby was the last boss to be officially revealed, and initially the game only had Elaine, Dutch and Fantoccio as the main bosses.

- Barnaby LOVES puns. A good deal of the lines he says when you get defeated in his chase contain a pun.

- You try being slick by stating you want to die of old age? Too bad: Barnaby will make you age rapidly. Despite that, Katie confirmed he doesn't have time related powers...

- Katie and Ash confirmed Barnaby can fly. And such a sight is apparently really hilarious.

- Barnaby loves shiny trinkets: if he sees a sparkly thread, he'll fixate on it and will follow its movements. It's like with a cat following a laser.

- Barnaby has teeth; they're orange and sharp, and come out when he's ticked off, or especially devious.

- When he was alive, he only used he/him pronouns. He became comfortable with all pronouns after he died. He's always been interested in men.

- This goes without saying, but still: he operates on cartoon logic. He can use both his wings AND his feet as hands. Even both feet can act as hands, even when they appear off camera. How? Because it's Barnaby and he can do anything he sets his mind into!

An' BarnToccio drawn by the lead illustrator jumpscare lol-

Ok before I say anything about the actual content of this ask, I need you to know that you coming to me to infodump and wanting to involve me in the things you're passionate about absolutely makes my day, ilysm- /p

He is absolutely FASCINATING, I love the combination of like. what he was when he was alive and what has been taken from him with what he is now and the weird fucking creature that is. All of the characters in this seem so awesome fr

#onyx talks too much #modgirly #bbu #long post

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cloud-somersault · 2 months

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I think it has to do with multiple things. For Wukong by himself, he's tall because he's strong. To some, him being short would negate his strength. They also correlate it with his growth as a person. He's a better person now, so he's taller.

For Macaque, specifically, some people like to characterize as a gremlin, so he has to be short. They also use his to empathize how no one listened to him, i.e. everyone towering over him and not taking him seriously. Or they correlate it to his death and regression caused him to shrink.

For when shadowpeach together, it mostly has to do with their dynamic. Some people like the dumb and tall with the suave and short dynamic. Others like what it says about their their relationship. Wukong looking down on Macaque with Macaque having to look up to Wukong. There's also the top and bottom stuff.

And sometimes it just makes the brain go brrrr... ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

(For me personally, most of these are reasons for their heights to be inversed. Being taller does not correlate with being a better person. That's just me though)

I think connecting physical traits to personality and characteristics is a big no-no for multiple reasons....and that's how we get into dangerous territory when it comes to common stereotypes/archetypes/etc. that could be harmful, even if it's unintentional....

And it's also just not realistic or based in reality...there are plenty of strong short people...there are plenty of lean tall people...

Also, we don't need to use physical characteristics to convey something about someone. "Macaque's short to signify how everyone looked down on him" you could do that with certain framing in an art piece or the tone in a piece of writing. You could use introspection to make Macaque and the reader feel that oppression and disrespect, and then it's not connected to his height. Because, what? If he's tall, then that feeling goes away? If he's tall, does he feel like he's being listened to? No! it has nothing to do with his height; it has everything to do with his character and personality.

Azure and Peng don't give two fucks if Macaque is four feet or six feet tall -- they are not listening to that mans!!!

The only two I can understand are the dynamics which also goes with making the brain go brrrr, and I like to give others the benefit of the doubt when it comes to things, so I'm gonna go with it being brain worms. I just get suspicious when I see so much of the same thing in a fandom, like there's almost always a reason for that.

And it probably is linked to top/bottom discourse, but if that's the case? Then people have no idea how sex works. BDSM and sexual positions are different things. I don't have time to go into this and I can't on this blog because it's not NSFW, but connecting position to height is................not the move, needless to say.

I think I'm gonna chalk it up to "It's personal preference!! And the majority of the fandom agrees with this preference and there's nothing else going on"

and i'll just sit in my "weird takes/strange opinions and headcanons" corner and play with my little dolls because. Yeah.

#ask #anon #not even gonna talk about how in jttw wukong's a scrawny little thing but anyway #have fun tall wukong enjoyers #thanks for listing out reasons i just find it a bit odd but anyway! moving on!

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sinistermaximalism · 1 year

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a beautiful monster - Crimson Peak (2015)

shall we have the argument about whether or not Crimson Peak is a horror movie? Guillermo del Toro says it's not, that it's a Gothic romance, and yes okay maybe he knows best, but also all movies are horror movies, QED.

right, now we've got that sorted, let's talk about Allerdale Hall. The titular Crimson Peak, named for the blood-red clay of the ground the house sits on (and which made the family their fortune), is a beautiful nightmare. by design. as well as, you know, all the ghosts, del Toro intended for the house itself to be a monster. it's a character in its own right; it shifts, it screams, it bleeds.

the actual set was fully constructed, for real, save the hole in the roof that light (and snow) falls through, which means someone had to physically create all of those details you're looking at. go on, open up the photo and take a proper look. the shot up at the top of the post, a low angle on the entrance hall, makes Allerdale Hall a hulking monster; as a viewer, you're dwarfed by it.

partly that's the angle, looking up, but partly it's the triple (quadruple?) height ceiling. each floor has a high ceiling, but here, in the hall, you're looking all the way up, up the staircases that line the walls, all the way to the roof. for a house with secrets, that entrance hall feels wide open. like a mouth. or a maw.

you can get a better look at some of the details here. what a difference lighting makes, eh? here, you can see that the house is full of colour, glowing gold and jade, reflecting the colours of the then-happy couple. (Edith's always in gold, she always glows.) colour is deeply significant in this film, as del Toro basically colour-codes everything, and it doesn't take a lot of analysis to see the difference between how grand and beautiful the house looks here vs how it looks in the dark.

considering the height of this room, there are very few windows. actually, that hole in the roof might be serving a useful purpose - otherwise, the only natural light is coming from that one window at the top, which really only serves to enhance the feeling that you're being engulfed by something. even when you can see the gold, you're still in the belly of the beast.

architecture-wise, we're talking Gothic Gothic Gothic. all those arches! all those sharp points! this house has teeth. it's incredibly ornate, and incredibly sinister. (was this house the inspiration for my blog name? you got me.)

it's opulent, Victorian, even fussy, but crucially, it's also ruined. you don't notice it so much in the light like this, but as Edith explores, she finds out just how much of a mess everything really is. and I mean, imagine how much dust would build up in all of those nooks and crannies. everything in this house looks like it's designed to keep an army of servants busy, except that the Sharpes, by the time we meet them, have run out of money, and everything's falling apart.

here's another look, from a slightly different angle, of how those staircases wind around and around one another. you'd get lost in this house, wouldn't you? Crimson Peak deliberately draws on Gothic literature, and in those stories, unsuspecting women were often imprisoned and undone by big houses. this one has devoured more than its fair share. but then, it's a big beast. imagine the second Mrs de Winter trying to take charge of a house like this! brrrr.

so, features worth taking another look at: the carved bannisters; the twisted columns; the uncanny angles of the staircase; the grandfather clock that almost disappears into the wall; that tapestry, gold and green again, a signal about where the story's going. steps, steps, and more steps. this is a house designed on the scale of a cathedral (check out the painted saints on the walls of the second floor!) except that in those spaces, the Gothic arches and huge stained glass windows are designed to direct your eyes and your mind upwards to heaven. Crimson Peak is sinking into the ground, and it'll take you down with it if you give it a chance.

fwiw I would definitely use that gold and green colour scheme in my own home. it's something I've been genuinely considering - rich jade green walls with antique gold highlights - for a little while, and only when pulling together pictures for this post did I consider the subconscious inspiration.

probably gonna skip all the spiky bits, though.

#Crimson Peak #Guillermo del Toro #interior design #horror interiors #gothic #gothic romance #sinister maximalism

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jinn-mori · 2 years

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Aight for the WIP ask thing, I wanna ask about Hello My Old Heart (because I love that song, lol) and the Sanrouge Book Cover (because I love book covers too). Go on and talk about your babies :D

Aight, let's do this!

Okay, so Hello My Old Heart is a One Piece fanfic that's one part Dofuwani (Doflamingo x Crocodile; wani is Japanese for crocodile. Also just love Doffy being 110% down bad for Crocodile and jshaskdhaks the height difference just makes my brain go brrrr), one part Dadodile (An AU where Crocodile is Luffy's dad. This AU spawned from the OP fandom theory of Crocodile being Luffy's mom, which you can look into on your own) and Doffy getting a lot of therapy in the form of trying to be a good husband and parental figure to the kid versions of Luffy, Ace, and Sabo.

Also might give Doffy a good outfit cuz contrary to popular belief (and I will die on this hill)... DOFFY DOESN'T HAVE DRIP! Istg what was Oda thinking with that design?! Then again, Oda is the same guy who made an ability of the Brachiosaurus Devil Fruit be that the user *wheeze* CAN SHOOT THEIR TAIL, NECK, AND HEAD OUT THE BODY LIKE A WORM SHOOTING ITSELF OUT OF AN APPLE!

But to get to the stuff about Sanrouge, the idea of how to do the book cover came to me with a most bizzare muse... I was listening to Bloody Stream from JJBA Part 2 which my brain initially categorized as a Natane and Mars song but now it's one of the songs that I associate with Sanrouge as a whole, along with Demon Kitty Rag by Katzenjammer and Hand Me My Shovel, I'm Going In by Will Wood. Other sources of inspiration include the manga volume covers of FT along with the idea of it being kinda like a movie poster. Natane, Soleil, and Mars are at the front with the title on top and a little 'Starring:' thing near the top too.

Book covers are fun.

And a tip for storywriting: If you think something is too outlandish, look at JJBA and One Piece. They're peak absurdity.

#asks #ask game #sanrouge #fairy tail #one piece

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touyasdoll · 3 years

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Almost went full on OwO but cringed myself outta it at the last second of this message. Anyways! Still mulling ‘bout the Todoroki’s Snow Bunny stuff, BUT…..

Heard someone talkin’ ‘bout Miruko, saw ya also liked the woman who could could easily have me at her mercy (*cough* ain’t hard *cough*), therefore I will provide a bit for y’all! 😉😏😏

- Invisible Ribbitch

🐇 ❤️‍🔥 NSFW AHEAD ❤️‍🔥🐇

“B-babe…”, you started with a definite whimper in your voice as you were boxed in against the wall by your very tall, very powerful, very sexy girlfriend: the Rabbit Heroine Miruko, or as you knew her, Rumi.

“Are you tryin’ to back out now, babe?” Rumi smirked, her words a tease and a challenge all in a one as she presses you against the wall. Her knee had parted your thighs just right and at the height difference any movement was essentially you grinding down on her. You tried to maintain yourself, to hold firm, but your buff bunny girlfriend has chosen her words well, making sure you felt how overpowered you were by her without her even laying hands on you yet.

You tried to get ahold of yourself & shifted slightly to do so. This was the start of your undoing. Both you & your girlfriend were bare leaving the action to be skin on skin, making you all the more flustered.

You moaned as you inadvertently ground against her, leaving her knee & leg wet as you did so, your pussy sliding smoother as she hitched her knee upwards, causing you to shriek. You slid forward, just about eye level with Rumi now & whined loudly at the loss of friction as she moved her arms. Her arms that were like steel beams, wrapping around you, holding your hips in place.

“Aww,”she practically purred, her rabbit ears flicking in pleasure. Smug pleasure. “Someone is a needy thing today, ain’tcha?”

“Rumi-chan!” You whined again, making her cackle loudly as she moved you back up her slicked leg by your hips & let you fall, sliding down to meet her again. The friction of the action had you moaning & then whining again as you came to a stop and were held tight. You were stimulated in ways a vibrator or dildo could never. You wanted to be stubborn, to fight it, to stop all your little noises your girlfriend always managed to pull out of you…but you couldn’t. Not when you were straddling her leg just so, toes unable to reach the ground, held up by the strength of her amazing thighs alone, for fuck’s sake!

Rumi huffed for a moment. You were close, but obviously hadn’t given in — though you hadn’t backed out of the dare, either. She peered down at you in annoyance, causing you to want to straighten your spine & stare (Pout, Rumi would say, It was always a pout, never a glare or sulk. Just a cute bunny pout.) straight back at her, as well as just plain back down in easy submission. Only she had ever make you feel like that.

With a more mischievous smirk than before, she moved her leg a bit. You squeaked. She did it again and you whimpered. Soon, Rumi had begun to jiggle her leg up & down, quick as a rabbit thumps, providing even more sensations that were driving you wild. You cried out wantonly, your breath coming out in hot, equally lewd pants, “Oh, oh! OH! Rumiiiii! Please!”

“Hmm? Please what? Gonna hafta speak up, Princess~”

“Nnng,”the sound you made was a growl & whine all rolled into one & only served to make her grin at you wider.

You took a deep breath & suddenly she changed her rhythm, bucking you up harder, but not as quick. It knocked the breath and fight out of you. “Ohhhh… ah! Fine, fine! Rumi, I’ll wear it just please let me cum first, please!”

“Oh? You’ll wear a copy of my costume?”, she asked, eyes gleaming at the prospect of you doing such and at your submission. Whoever said rabbits were weak, easy, soft prey animals were cowards with tiny dicks, you thought with a brief sort of savage air that would make your girlfriend proud if she could of heard it.

“Yes!”

“All day? While working in the office with me?”

“Ye-EHH-s!”

“And let me bend you over my desk, taking you with the new strap on I just bought, at any point of the day & so many other places in the office, too?”

“Yes!!! Yes, Rumi, fucking ye— wait. What was that last part?”

“Too late!” She cackled, stopping with the leg movements and sweeping you into her arms that had to be made of some sort of metal, you didn’t care what the doctors said that kind of strength was just too… You shook your head as she turned the corner quickly, speeding into your room & throwing you onto the bed like beads in a parade.

“A deal’s a deal, babe,” she sent you a saucy wink, one that made you want to flip her off (because goddammit, Rumi), before climbing onto the bed after you. She surveyed your sweaty, shining body & licked her lips, liking what she saw. “Now, come to Mama…!”

— fin.

Ahhh size kink makin’ my brain go brrrr over this 😩

#invisible ribbitch #miruko smut #miruko thirst #minors dni #just thirsting

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strawberry-jellicle · 3 years

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This is your open invitation to infodump about an opinion you've been wanting to share. Go off, friend 💙

I wanted to talk about this for a while on this hellsite.

THE RUM TUM TUGGER ISN'T AN ABUSIVE DUMBASS

Let me explain.

First off, y'all need to stop applying ye ol yaoi ship tropes to anything mlm that has a height difference so jot that down. (Y'all know who y'all are).

Second, y'all need to stop treating sex positive characters like they're just mindless sex machines. Tugger is sex positive character but he's got more personality than just "hehe bisexual cat has sex with everyone and goes brrrr"!

Third, call it the projection but literally people misinterpret him. Tugger isn't a dumb asshole. Like yeah he's rambunctious, loves attention, and is a party animal, but he's also clearly shown to have deep respect and love for those around him. Tugger's like that 21 year old dude who is here for the laffs and has that good ol ADHD. He's a little shit but he's not malicious or out to get anybody.

Fourth, his song calls him a "curious cat" and "artful and knowing". He's clearly a smart cat that, yes gets stuck in things, but he's always exploring and learning things. He is possibly one of the smartest cats in the junkyard. He's curious! He's gonna go explore and obtain knowledge from his shenanigans!

Fifth, even though he does get up to funny stuff, he still clearly knows when to back off and pay respects. During Old Deuteronomy, Tugger sings about Deuteronomy alongside Munkustrap with the utmost respect and awe. And after Deuteronomy is settled in, Tugger does go to check up on him multiple times during the ball (in the 98 film at least).

Sixth, he clearly loves hyping up those around him and isn't an airheaded asshole. Ship it or not, but Tugger showed a lot of character development when singing for/with Mistoffelees near the end of the musical. He spends 5+ minutes doing nothing but singing about a cat other than himself and showing them off to the tribe! And after Deut is brought back, instead of taking the credit for himself he turns Deut towards Misto and is like "hey! This is the guy who did it! Not me!" Which, again, big character depth for a cat who thrives off the spotlight!

Tugger's just a silly kitty with ADHD/Autism who is here for a good time and loves those around him. He's a complex character that I hold so close to me and I hate when bisexual coded sex positive characters get misrepresented! You can headcanon him how you want, but don't take away the fact that he's a good character.

#jellicle ask #cats musical #cats 1998 #rum tum tugger #mister mistoffelees #old deuteronomy #lina speaks

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mellow-is-liveblogging · 3 years

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I am foaming at the mouth. Kakyouin/Pucci headcanon post time I am starved of content

I would like to put a read more cut but I'm on mobile and idk how to do that >:'((( sorry @ any of my followers who have to scroll past this and don't want to read it

🐍🍒

- They met in Dio's mansion and had the time to get pretty close, initially through geeking out about mutual interests and then by simply vibing together.

- Pucci has some degree of separation anxiety and sticks to Kakyouin probably more than necessary, most of his time is spent either with him or with Dio. Gotta make sure the emotional support vampire and the weird kid he likes are both doing alright.

- They both like art, but Kakyouin prefers painting and is skilled with acrylics, gouache and such, while Pucci prefers sketching with graphite and charcoals. They like watching each other draw.

- Pucci has sketched portraits of Kakyouin and if asked about them, he can just say he makes portraits of everyone at the mansion- which is true, but also he draws Kakyouin just a bit more than he does everyone else.

- Neither of them enjoys feelings talk so their main displays of affection are physical contact and mutual infodumping.

- They're pretty liberal when it comes to physical contact like cuddling, hand-holding or cheek kisses, even as just a platonic thing since Pucci is used to being touchy with his family and Dio. He initiates most of it. Before they even realized they had feelings for each other they probably spent most of their time tangled together anyways.

- They're a good influence on each other, sort of. Dio is a good friend to Pucci but he's an adult and the kid would probably do better with other kids around as well, so Kak is also convenient.

- Friendships hit different when it's someone your age who shares the same things that isolated you from your peers.

- Kakyouin (5'10 at 17) holds the height and age difference over Pucci's (5'7 at 16) head almost constantly even if it's just a year and three inches.

- They both have cold hands usually, so it's just them mutually shoving their hands under each other's shirt for warmth.

- Ideal date: breaking into a museum together in the dead of night

- Or going out in town at the local open air market

- Pucci has a sweet tooth and is pretty jealous of his food. Kakyouin has made it a point to steal it whenever he can.

- POV you're Dio and you hear Pucci screaming at Kakyouin to "give back his fucking cookies before he turns him into a detox smoothie" from downstairs. This is the fourth time in a month that it happens.

- Stand Shenanigans entail: Whitesnake biting the green part of Hierophant's arm out of curiosity. (History repeats when Star Platinum bites Hierophant as well later on). ok from here on out ig its just misc stand headcanons seasoned with homosexuality.

- My Whitesnake design has an actual snake tail because canon-divergent designs go brrrr and everyone uses it as a pillow. It's. A very rude and very stinky pillow due to its acid powers but pillow nonetheless.

- It wraps around the people it likes and whenever Kakyouin is around while it's out, chances are it's gonna be all over him in seconds.

- Same goes with Green. If it's around Enrico, it's probably gonna have a tendril around his arm.

- Green is very touchy with Kakyouin as well but it doesn't speak- rather communicating in chirps and beeps. Whitesnake hates touching strangers, but it has no problem with it if it's someone it likes. It's pretty vocal and brutally honest, despite its speech being slow and slurred. It often can't form a complete sentence but it has no trouble bullying people.

#mellow.txt #puccikak #kakpucci #norico #jjba #jojo's bizarre adventure #stardust crusaders #enrico pucci #noriyaki kakyouin #noriaki kakyoin #jjba whitesnake #hierophant green

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sweetaspiesammy · 3 years

Note

Supernatural omegaverse but do a trope subversion were alphas are the ones that get the shit end of the stick.

"Everyone knows alphas can't control themselves. It's better to hand them over to the state early so they're calmer as adults."

"I can't believe some people are against collaring alphas. We have to keep them under control somehow."

"They're just so agressive. I'd never let my dear omega child near an alpha one."

But also everyone still goes with "Omegas are weak/dainty/need help". At least when Alphas are involved.

Sam goes to Stanford but he brings Dean with him because he knows two alphas living alone under one roof is just asking for trouble (from a legal standpoint; Dean and John get along swimmingly). He never really gets close to anyone because they either assume he's an alpha (curse his height) or they go overnboard telling him how "brave" he's being with "dealing with" his brother.

idk man ideas go brrrr

Oh that’s actually interesting, very different from normal ABO AUs for sure

#asks

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kazoo-lord · 4 years

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17 questions 17 people

Thank you for the tag @hanhan156 💖

1. Nickname: I don't have one. Well, I sort of had one in my softball team, but it would be too long to explain in English and nobody calls me like that anymore.

2. Zodiac: Gemini

3. Height: 160 cm

4. Hogwarts House: I don't quite remember the specifics... Ravenclaw, maybe?

5. Last Thing I Googled: Underwhelming. I never know where to place the h.

6. Song Stuck in My Head: It usually is something from Ghost. Right now it happens to be Square Hammer.

7. Number of Followers: 861.

8. Amount of Sleep: I NEED a minimum of 8 and a half hours. If I can get 9 I'm good too.

9. Lucky Number: No idea.

10. Dream Job: Fire Ghoul Wildlife filmmaker

11. Wearing: A lime-green & white polo shirt and beige shorts.

12. Favorite Song: Square Hammer...

13. Aesthetic: Minimalist.

14. Favorite Author: If manga authors count, Hirohiko Araki. He is so hecking weird!!! The inside of his head must be amazing! Jojo's Bizarre Adventure is so random, yet so captivating. How does he do that?? He's been drawing and writing it for 34 years and it's still so entertaining! He can create main characters very different from each other and yet all of them are great protagonists! What kind of magic is this?? Also, his music taste is top notch.

15. Favorite Instrument: Electric guitar (or "normal" guitar, as my hero Tobias Forge calls it 😆) and keyboards.

16. Favorite Animal Noise: My grandma had a pet bird that would sing all day. He had like 4 different tunes and sometimes he would do a remix (his transitions were hecking smooth, I kid you not). Once the remix was done, he always ended by a little "brrrr". That is the most adorable animal noise ever.

17. Random: My current middle-term goal is to take a nature photograph so good that BBC Earth will feature it in its Insta account.

I don't think I'm going to tag 17 people, but I'd like to read @hyacinth-meadow @mochibat and @goldenjoestars if it's okay for you. Also, those who wanna do this can consider themselves tagged by me!

#tag game

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xoruffitup · 5 years

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The Report & Marriage Story: Adam Driver at TIFF

(If you just want to skip down to one/both of the film recaps, scroll on down to The Report and Marriage Story bolded headings. :)) There are some pics and vids down there too!)

So my friend Sarah and I spent just over 24 hours in Toronto, and it’s no exaggeration to say that during those 24 hours Adam made us feel the entire spectrum of every single possible human emotion. The Report was a nerve-wracking, intelligent, quick-witted political drama set at a break-neck pace of horrific headline after shuddering truth after sickening revelation. Marriage Story was nothing short of a masterpiece - delivering laughs, heartbreak, emotional turmoil, tears, and aching poignancy. I’m not usually one for romantic or real-life dramas like Marriage Story, but damn if that film wasn’t literally one of the most moving and powerful pieces of cinema I’ve seen in recent memory. The Report rises to the same standards, but for completely different reasons.

The films themselves are so incredibly well made in terms of writing and production, but seeing Adam in two major leading roles back to back that couldn’t have been more utterly different in tone or persona was nothing short of flooring. I know this, and of course most of you reading this also know, but GOD it isn’t even possible to fully describe the breadth and sheer force of Adam’s talent. The performances were light years apart, and yet both seared with completely unique energy that just radiated off the screen. I’ve watched almost everything Adam has appeared in, I know he’s the best actor of his generation, and yet he still manages to completely stun me with his seemingly never-ending ability to reveal an entirely different way of being in a new role. Beyond simply an accent or posture, Adam has this unparalleled ability to not only embody a completely novel persona each time, but to then completely naturally reveal that persona’s deepest, truest essence with the smallest facial twitch, turn of his head, or break in his voice. Watching him in a fresh role is literally like discovering a new facet of the human experience.

Watching these superb films in a setting like this massive film festival, where the audience was riveted and excited to engage with the content, elevated both of the viewing experiences to monumental heights. THEN, there was the fact that before and after each screening, Adam and the rest of the main cast members would come on stage with the director to speak about the film and answer questions. This of course meant – being me – that even the slightest glimpse of him would send me into silent fits of glee and awe. So combine being in Adam’s presence repeatedly and for rather long stretches of time with the emotional hurricane powerhouse of not just one but two film epics, ANNND yup it was a recipe for Biggest Emotional Rollercoaster Trainwreck Ever Known To Man. :’)

I did (somehow) manage to keep myself together! Enough so that I asked Adam a question during the Marriage Story Q&A! ;_____; (Sarah was trying to film covertly so needed a second to achieve that zoom action!)

vimeo

I couldn’t even tell you how it’s possible to string two coherent words together while speaking to 6’2” of well-dressed Talented Babe who’s fucking radiant in person, because it’s literally like an out-of-body experience where some alter ego screaming ‘TALK! TO! HIM!’ just takes over my body while the rest of me is floating off into the stratosphere!!!! (Skip on down to the Marriage Story movie analysis for more info on what I was asking about.)

Okay so let me back up and go through the day chronologically so I have SOME organization for my fangirl thoughts!

I got into Toronto from a 14-hour bus ride at 8:30 AM; Sarah got in on a flight at 9:30. We met up at our hotel and went straight to the theatre where the premium screenings would be taking place. We were able to get front barrier spots along the street and who soon arrived but none other than….!

Our lord and savior Rian Johnson, all hail! He directed the movie Knives Out that was playing at 11 AM in the same theatre. We took turns grabbing coffees because brrrr the Toronto morning was a bit nippy. The Report screening was scheduled to start at 1:45, but none of the cast had shown up yet as of 1:00. Shortly after, big cars started to pull up and Annette Bening and Jon Hamm arrived! We started nail-biting a bit at this point, because we needed to get into the theater 15 minutes before the movie started otherwise they might give our tickets away to people in the Rush Ticket line, but Adam hadn’t arrived yet and there was a chance he would sign for the barricade when he did. But once it started ticking below 15 minutes and still no sign of Adam (tension was real – the whole crowd would go quiet every time a car pulled up, then all sigh in disappointment when someone other than Adam got out), we called it and went to join the Ticketholder line to enter theatre.

WELL, good thing we did! Turns out Adam arrived late and had to rush inside right away, and we had the very serendipitous timing of walking past the secret elevator entrance up into the theater RIGHT when the elevator doors opened and Adam appeared, walking out and into the theater auditorium!! My heart slapped me in the face a bit (a lot) when we caught that glimpse of him so close up. I know there are plenty of pics now but he looked sO striking and sleek in that understated, classic blue suit. He’s SO taLL and still so massive when he’s a few feet away, don’t worry guys he looked plenty healthy even if without the Kylo Ren bulk <333 IT WAS GREAT. I COULD CRY ABOUT JUST THAT MOMENT. God help me with everything that would follow :’’’’’)

Before The Report started, Director Scott Z Burns came on stage to give a brief introduction. This was the first time the film was screening outside of the US and he was very much looking forward to the response and a wider dialogue about the issues raised in the film. He introduced the cast, and was joined on stage by the producer, Jon Hamm (who came on stage in a very silly fashion – see vid below), Annette Bening, and then Adam. And damn if that man didn’t look even MORE drop dead beautiful up there in stage lights. Be still, my heart.

…fat chance of that happening, because my heart was about to rev up into breakneck pace for the following 2.5 hours of the film.

The Report (We’re about to get very spoilery, fair warning!)

Movies are often called “important.” This one is more than that; it is imperative. The tragedy that will plague this film is that much like the staffers of the Senate and CIA that bicker back and forth throughout the decade chronicled in this movie; unproductive bickering will continue between those who appreciate a difficult truth-seeking film like this, and those that will disparage it knowing only the bare minimum of its premise. The latter will do so because of their unswerving understanding of American Patriotism to mean that America comes first, that there’s no justification more ironclad and unquestionable than national security, and America wins no matter the cost.

But. If by some miracle, the people of that latter group could be corralled into watching this film, it just might change their minds.

This movie is difficult. It is horrifying, at times nauseating. It challenges you as the investigations and counter-investigations build over each other, as the conflicting characterizations of the Enhanced Interrogation Techniques (EIT) program multiply, and yet even for all that, its takeaway hits you with clarity that is both sobering and impartial.

“National security” rationales were a chimera for barbarisms that achieved nothing. The US government tortured, degraded, and murdered prisoners at its mercy for no demonstrable reason or result. One of the most on-the-nose scenes where all the many moving parts of this complex, dirty history come together is when Dan meets with a New York Times journalist in his car towards the end, as he debates giving his report to the press to release when he fears government red tape will never let it see the light of day. The reporter asks him something like, “Why did the CIA keep doing it, if it wasn’t working?”

After two head-spinning, sickening, revelatory two hours, Dan compresses it all down to something like: “After 9/11 everyone was scared, and the CIA used that fear to act with impunity. They resorted to illegal means to try to keep some control of the situation. They knew it was wrong, and they knew it wasn’t working, so they became more desperate for results to justify it. And it was easy, because the detainees looked different than us. They spoke a different language than us, with different values.”

And so it spiraled to darker and darker depths, in which one failure to produce information by dubious means was taken to justify the next escalation in interrogation techniques.

This is where I need to warn everyone that this is not easy viewing. This film doesn’t let you shy away from what these interrogation techniques really meant. It doesn’t sanitize. You will see waterboarding happening. You will see people naked and chained in cells. You will see glimpses of even worse depravities. And then you will see the psychologist contractors who came to the black sites and claimed with utterly clueless, infuriating impunity that no, they’d never interrogated a terrorist before; no, they didn’t know anything about international law or the rights to trial and legal counsel. (“You think he’s getting a trial?” one said skeptically when his techniques were questioned.) But what they did know was the human brain and how to break it down. Then, you will see the CIA top brass back in DC who never saw with their own eyes even an instant of the abuses they were blithely and sanctimoniously sanctioning.

This film poses the question of how one defines American Patriotism. Chances are, you’re not going to be much moved by the CIA staff’s understanding - who say in defense of their tactics, “It’s only illegal if it doesn’t work.” Then when it doesn’t work, who go on to baselessly credit their EIT program with the intelligence that led to Bin Laden’s capture.

Then, we have Dan Jones/Adam. Dan Jones, who spent literally five years of his life in a basement bunker researching and scraping details together about a program the CIA did everything they could to keep under lock and key. He persevered when the CIA refused to provide any documents, communications, or witnesses; when the CIA denied that they themselves internally questioned the effectiveness of the program; even when they accused him of stealing the documents he finally managed to get his hands on. When the real Dan Jones was brought on stage after the film ended, he received a minutes-long standing ovation that couldn’t have been more deserved.

Most of the audience would probably find it difficult to identify with that understanding of patriotism that claims “It’s only illegal if it doesn’t work” and “Shouldn’t we be grateful just for the fact that we live in a country where a report like this can be written?” (claimed by Jon Hamm as Obama’s Chief of Staff, when pressed by Bening’s Diane Feinstein about releasing the report before the mid-term shift of the Senate going Republican.) What’s much more moving is Feinstein’s rejoinder that “I want to live in a country that publishes this report.” Or the coup-de-grace scene towards the film’s end that incorporates real footage of John McCain’s speech on the Senate floor against the EIT program, when he introduced the McCain-Feinstein bill that would ban the practice. When McCain called on the US to be better than its enemies, and to maintain a standard of honor worth defending.

Dan puts it painfully aptly in the full monologue teased in the trailer: “They say they saved lives but what they really did was make it impossible to prosecute a mass murderer, because if what we did to him ever comes out in a court of law, the case is over. The guy planned 9/11… (continued from memory) … but instead of spending the rest of his life in jail, we turned him into the strongest recruiting tool for our enemies.”

These moments of Dan’s desperation to make others see the truth so glaringly, shamefully obvious to him are when he delivers his most biting rejoinders. As he questions John Yoo’s legal justification in the Torture Memo of the interrogations not amounting to torture so long as they don’t cause “lasting harm”, Dan points to the detainee who died under the conditions of his confinement and demands, “So how long is he going to be dead?!”

Okay so FINALLY, here’s where I turn to Adam’s oh so stellar performance. Adam mentioned in both the Q&A after this screening and in a previous interview that he had to learn the appropriate sense of “decorum” from Dan Jones that would befit a Senate staffer. Adam nailed it. He was playing a relatively low-ranking staffer, grappling with issues of abuse and mismanagement that would have incriminated all manner of public figures miles above him. He had no real power to do anything about the horrific truths he was unearthing, and yet there were too many moments when he seemed to be the only one who truly understood or cared for the truth. Adam played this tight-knit, occasionally fraying sense of necessary professionalism with just the right amount of restraint and understatement. His performance was never boisterous nor melodramatic. And yet, the ever more desperate edge to his dedication couldn’t have been more palpable. Adam’s performance delivered every bit of impact commensurate to the towering gravity of Dan Jones’ investigation.

And yet, for every bit that Adam’s performance remained appropriately understated (it never felt like anything but a true-to-life depiction; hardly ever making you aware you’re watching a dramatization), the depth and nuance in its subtlety was nothing short of masterful. His brief but singeing moments of frustration are short-lived but strike deeply. What really struck me though were two particularly powerful #King of Microexpressions moments.

When the threat of criminal charges for hacking into CIA records is raised against him and he sees a lawyer for the first time to assess his options. After he has to face the fact that this is more complicated than his repeated assertion that “I didn’t do it. I didn’t do it.” He’s quiet for a moment, then asks in a soft, defeated voice, “How long could I go away?” The camera zooms close on Adam’s face when the lawyer responds “twenty years.” Adam’s face barely changes, and yet you can see that number settling into him with pained horror alongside incomprehension. It’s one of those moments where without saying anything, without barely even a gesture, Adam renders his character so desperately empathetic. As the viewer, you realize at that moment you’ve been building an irresistible and compelling emotional connection to him since the second you saw him the first time, and he didn’t even make you aware he was doing it.

The shot in the trailer of him sitting at a desk between the two giant stacks of his report papers. This is when the Senate Intelligence Committee is taking a vote whether to recommend the investigation for further action. I’m pretty sure Adam didn’t say a single line in this scene. Senator Feinstein called the Committee to vote, and as the voices around the table chime “aye” or “nay,” the camera does a slow pan on Dan sitting there, listening with his hands folded. You can barely trace the shifts in his expression. You can barely see anything discernible in his face, and yet simply by the way his shoulders move, the way his jaw shifts every so slightly, and the way he blinks – you’re right there on the edge of your seat with him. You can feel in your very soul his repressed, barely-controlled sense of desperation as the report that’s become his life’s work is put to a vote of either life or death.

Guys, just in case you didn’t realize this by now… Adam is a wonder and it simply defies my understanding how everyone in the whole world hasn’t come to consensus by now that he invented acting and everyone else can just go home and let him play every role ever.

Okay now the one kind of amusing bit in the film! Sadly most audience members won’t get the same kick out of this that we will, but Joanne is in the film playing a CIA staffer. She and Adam share one scene, in which she walks up to him and says, “Your face and your report are bullshit.”

INCREDIBLE. Roast your man, Joanne.

Although the movie tries to tie things up with the McCain-Feinstein anti-torture amendment that ended the EIT program and shows a quote by George Washington before the credits (in what to me seemed a bit of a forced attempt to put a comforting lid on everything) what left me feeling most helpless and frustrated was seeing how partisan politics repeatedly derailed meaningful action against the EIT program throughout the entire span of the film, and knowing full well that that’s exactly how DC still operates. There’s a scene where the timing of publishing the report is being debated. (“If we push this now, the Republicans will pull gun control. What if they pull healthcare?”) And to me, the most infuriating part is seeing the ethics by which our government runs constantly reduced to mere bargaining chips.

It seems there are no absolute lines of the permissible and impermissible. As we see, the CIA got away with torturing unarmed prisoners for years because they disguised it behind code words, wrapped it in nonsensical legal jargon to authorize it, engaged in some serious doublethink and called it a day. Constant debates that twist and manipulate the issues at stake can reduce every law to subjective application. Fallacies in logic and gruesome vengeance disguised as national security measures are defended without shame. The same modes of thinking that started the EIT program and sustained it for year upon shameful, unsuccessful year continue spinning the wheels of today’s destructive and shortsighted policies of self-interest and American exceptionalism.

OKAY, I’m off my soapbox now. Promise.

But last thing. Think about this for a crazy minute: Dan Jones’s report in full was some 7,000 pages. The only version that was ever published was heavily redacted down to a few hundred. What an incredible feat of scriptwriting that a five-year investigation that produced 7,000 pages worth of text was condensed down into a 2 hour movie.

((Also – I kept thinking at regular interviews during the film that holy shit this is giving me such strong vibes of my Presidential staffer Ben in my modern politics AU and I LOVED IT. I’m so extra inspired to press on writing!!))

End Spoilers: The Q&A afterwards! After the audience spent a few minutes giving Daniel Jones his much-deserved minutes of applause, the panel moderator started with a few questions, and here Jon Hamm and Annette Bening immediately started messing with Adam. (It’s clear they’re all buddies who love each other and I appreciate it so much :3) Whenever questions were posed generally to the cast, they would both immediately start passing the microphones down the line towards Adam, knowing full well that he wouldn’t want to talk but nudging him to do so anyway >:)) At one point he wound up with two microphones at the same time and started desperately shoving one back at Annette! For one question, before the microphones could be thrust upon him, as soon as Jon looked over towards him Adam sidestepped back behind the group and turned to start feeling the screen like he was looking for a way out. Lskdjflaskj DORK <3 Annette immediately teased him like “There’s no door, Adam!” and then on a later question that was also posed to “the cast,” Jon and Adam both started pretending to look for a door together. :’)

When responding to a question about what drew him to the role, Adam made a really interesting comment about Dan as a character who “gets the instructions for something to build, and it turns out he was building his own gallows.” (Video below!) He also spoke a bit as to the fact that he was intrigued to create a clear depiction of the internal effort to fact-find and implement accountability about such a contested, tangled issue for which a whole PR campaign existed to defend, even with misinformation.

vimeo

Have I mentioned how GOOD he looked in that suit?! Somehow he looked extra tall, I thought. And again, I know people are concerned about how thin he is right now, but he really looked fine!! His face is definitely a bit thinner, but his face shape has often changed along with his physique whenever he’s buffed up or down. He still looked plenty solid and very very damn pretty. >:3

Being the adoring fangirls we are, we’re well familiar with Adam’s ~discomfort or stiffness when he’s forced to be in public and speak at things like this. (We love one (1) awkward antisocial man.) During this panel, even though his answers had his usual introspection and self-deprecating, unconscious charm, he seemed to have an extra air of seriousness/attentiveness to him when listening to others’ comments or to audience questions. While he was giving the serious topic every bit the gravity it deserved, he also seemed to be conscious of not seeming partisan to any particular political outlook? I mean, the audience would often clap when someone on the panel said something about how the takeaways from the film are still relevant to the dysfunction and hypocrisy in today’s political climate. Adam would join in the clapping, but something I’ve always respected about him is that he never infuses his persona opinions – whatever they may be – with discussion of his work or his approach to it. I think it takes a lot of hubris and self-awareness to maintain that distinction, and resist the temptation to use a public platform to advance your own opinions. But he never seems remotely interested in any such thing. AITAF advocacy is maybe the closest, but even in that context he remains very restrained.

Did I mention he looked Beautiful like a damn vision? ;____;

Okay so leaving the theatre, my and Sarah’s heads were reeling. There was SO much to process and discuss from the film, we were grabbing onto our favorite lines and moments to recall, which launched us into discussion about political affairs today, interspersed with the occasional “Can you BELIEVE Adam’s Power in that one scene?!” and basically it was my absolute favorite kind of impassioned conversation ever. <333

Time was ticking though, and just before 5 we needed to head back to the theater entrance before Marriage Story started at 5:30. Okay and here – as if we hadn’t already endured enough emotional walloping today – came two massive emotional rollercoasters right after the other! With how little time we had between the films, it was difficult for us to get into the red carpet crowd just beforehand. But as we turned the corner, we heard shouts of his name and !!!!!! there he was outside signing!! Bless his heart, he was across the street from the theatre signing for the long line of people on the other side who I hadn’t seen anyone go over to that morning. :’) Sarah and I ran over to try to join the end of the line and he almooooost got down to us, but it was a little too dicey with the line being kind of chaotic where the barrier ended. But WE WERE SO CLOSE TO HIM. HE WAS RADIANT EVEN WHILE LOOKING ADORABLY SLIGHTLY GRUMPY WHILE HE UNCOMPLAININGLY TOOK PHOTOS AND HE’S THE BEST AND MOST EXQUISITE EVER

I can just imagine in his head like halfway down that line: “oh god this was a mistake. Adam what did you do.” <3333

Emotional rollercoaster moment #2: Because Adam and ScarJo were both out signing, the sidewalk right in front of the theater had been barricaded off. This meant that we weren’t allowed to enter the theater until they both went inside, which only left us a few minutes to spare! We rushed to the entrance, but alas there was a problem with scanning our tickets, so we were told to go to the Box Office to get them reprinted. We’re already on edge, afraid we’re going to miss the beginning of the film, when the woman at the Box Office tells us she can’t reprint the tickets because the name on them doesn’t match ours. (We bought them from a resale site so of course it didn’t…)

Even after showing her every email we had documenting payment and that the tickets were transferred through an official sale site, she remained adamant it was policy that she couldn’t print the tickets. Clearly, we were kind of devastated for a moment there, thinking we’d just paid way over face value for these tickets that weren’t even going to work. But Sarah, bless her soul, had the idea to leave, then go back in through a different door with a different ticket scanner person. The tickets still didn’t scan correctly, but we told the woman scanning that we’d already ambiguously “checked” with the box office, and honestly I think she was just a very nice person and could sense our Desperation, so SHE LET US IN. Woman – wherever you are right now, know that we love you and are forever indebted to you. ;___;

By the time we got to our seats, Noah Baumbach was already on stage introducing the film. But luckily we were in our seats, we had caught our breath and clutched each other in rejoicing relief before Noah introduced the cast and brought Adam and Scarlett on stage. Queue lots of enthusiastic applause! Someone in the audience yelled, “We love you Scarlett!” There were some whoops through the theater, then someone else yelled, “And we love you too, Adam!” and he did an adorable awk wave of appreciation and have I meNtiOnED this giant of a man is the softest and most precious being to ever grace this world????? And I’m not sure if it’s come up yet or if maybe I haven’t mentioned? But I really really really love him? ;____;

Thank gosh Sarah caught it! Painfully presh video of our painfully presh man!

Marriage Story: (Again, there will be spoilers)

Oh god, okay. This one was a beast of massively epic proportions that I was not nearly prepared for. It takes you on an intense fucking ride that spans every possible angle of passion between two people, ranging from love to hatred. To be entirely honest, I had gone into the day more excited for The Report because the subject matter was of such interest to me, and because I’m not usually one to really enjoy real-life dramas all that much.

But this fucking movie was Exquisite from the very first shot. The film opens with the “What I love about Nicole / What I love about Charlie” voice overs, and within the span of mere minutes you already feel deeply for these characters. You already feel as if they’ve been your close friends all your life, and instead of just entering your awareness abruptly – they’ve lived entire lives with ups and downs, mistakes and successes for as long as you can remember.

The movie is a sweeping epic, and yet remains achingly resonant and relatable. Charlie and Nicole’s relationship is passionate, fiery, and riddled with both miscommunications and repressed resentments. You rarely see a (doomed) love study played out with such complexity and fireworks. And yet, their frustrations, desires, and victories/losses both large and small are completely credible. Relationships are messy, and this film doesn’t shy away from their absolute darkest and even cruelest corners - even while maintaining sparkling moments of human connection that somehow survive alongside even the most difficult challenges.

The film is a brilliant study of contradictions. As Charlie and Nicole move through the divorce process, their control over it and the very narrative of their own lives becomes appropriated by their respective lawyers. The beginning of the film showed us the tenderness and deep understanding that exists between these characters, so the stories the legal teams spin seem ridiculously far afield from reality. The beginning of the film brought us into a rich world between these characters that was natural and so effortlessly believable (long, uncut monologues of dialogue; characters wandering from room to room as they talk – It’s masterfully and deceptively purposeful filmmaking that completely hides all trace of itself). Then later, listening to the lawyers concoct disingenuous legal narratives to “win” rather than tell any truth of reality is a towering contrast. The lawyers seize on the smallest tiny things Nicole or Charlie did in previous scenes (Nicole finishing a bottle of wine in one night with her family; Charlie forgetting to strap in their son’s car seat once) to paint them as habitual alcoholics or neglectful, absent parents. As the divorce proceedings escalate, things become distorted past recognition – twisted into abstracted and even absurd depictions of these two characters, between which we simply can’t decide whom we feel more sympathy for.

And then, following a gloves-off divorce hearing couched in legalese where neither side gives any quarter, you have a scene that’s quiet and effortlessly heartwarming. Nicole calls Charlie because the power’s out at her house and could he try to fix the power box in the front yard? He comes over, he works on the box, they pass their sleeping son between them (“Maybe he should just sleep here?” “But it’s my night.”), and then they both have to manually pull the gate on the driveway closed from either side – Nicole inside, Charlie outside. They look at each other as they pull the gate, perfectly in sync and their gazes locked, until the gate slides closed in the inches just between their faces. The movie is littered with these tiny gorgeous moments that just tear at your heart.

Or, the moment in the middle of negotiations between their lawyers when everyone decides to pause and order lunch. Charlie is handed the menu and he simply stares at it helplessly, uncomprehending because he’s still trying to work through the shock of their new reality that was just being argued over by the lawyers with such casual cruelty. Everyone stares at him for a long minute, until Nicole gently takes the menu from his hands and says, “I’ll order for him.” She knows just what to order – a salad with a specific type of dressing – and he quietly, almost absently agrees, “Yes, I’ll have that.”

The film takes pains to be even in presenting both sides of the story, and giving Nicole and Charlie equal screen time. I spent the entirety of the movie switching my sympathies back and forth between the two of them. By the film’s end, I understood both of their positions and experiences completely, as well as how much their perspectives on all they shared had come to oppose each other. Even though it’s impossible for either us or the characters to understand how they developed such divergent perspectives on their marriage, all parties involved have to face just how irreconcilable their grievances have become and how differently they each view the fundamental shortcomings of their marriage.

Being the annoying feminist viewer that I am, I was completely absorbed by Nicole’s monologue early on, the first time she meets with her lawyer (Laura Dern). She comes clean with the whole account of how she feels no control over her own life, and the longer she spent with Charlie and living in Charlie’s world, the “smaller” she was becoming. She felt that he didn’t respect her interests or her undertakings, when they weren’t connected to his theatre company. In essence, she feels she never got to be anything other than what he made her.

With that background of her position, I absolutely wanted Nicole to build her own life apart from him and find her own sense of personhood. One where she makes her own decisions and follows her own passions. In her recounting, she keeps saying that she’s used to part of her feeling “dead inside,” in terms of not feeling truly engaged with or in control of what she’s doing with her life. Taking a television acting job in California – separate from Charlie’s theatre company where she was the star under his direction, where he called the shots and she supported “his genius” – was the first time she did something bold for herself. This was also after repeatedly expressing to Charlie that she wanted to spend more time in California (where her family live), and Charlie never seeming to seriously consider the idea. Nicole felt she didn’t really have a voice, living shrouded in Charlie’s shadow.

But also being the annoying Adam fangirl I am, I was drawn in by Charlie’s charisma, by his effortless and guileless charm. I may have “sided” with Nicole towards the beginning of the story, resenting the small ways we could see that Charlie might have unconsciously been controlling (“Did you change your hair? I like it better long.”), but as the story progresses, so does Charlie’s unraveling. His world begins to crumble and fall apart before his very eyes, and even though he tries his best, he’s unable to do a single thing to stop it. Once Nicole gets her high-powered, cutthroat lawyer involved, things escalate beyond all control at breakneck pace. Suddenly he finds himself having to hire lawyers he can’t afford just to prevent the possibility that their 8 year old son Henry might move permanently to California with Nicole and Charlie might not get any custody; or that Nicole will take most of their shared assets and he’ll have nothing left to fund his theatre company with.

Neither of them mean for the negotiations to reach some vindictive heights, but suddenly they both find themselves fighting just to be able to live the life they each think is theirs.

Charlie finds himself having to move temporarily to California and rent an apartment so he can see his son and so Nicole’s lawyers can’t try to depict him as neglectful. We know he’s anything but. The first scenes in the film showed him being so patient and good with Henry that we could just about cry at the injustice.

(There’s the most darling scene at the beginning where little Henry comes into their bedroom, pokes Charlie saying “Dad? I had a nightmare.” Charlie gets up and comes to lay down in Henry’s bed with him. When he tries to get up, Henry asks him to stay, but there’s not really enough space for both of them in the bed so Charlie shifts to sleep on the floor. Queue a shuffling sequence where Henry goes to sleep on the floor next to his dad, Charlie goes up into the bed when it’s empty, then shortly thereafter Henry climbs up on top of Charlie so they both fit in the bed and fall asleep there. Yeah, MY HEART.)

As the accusations start flying when things are on the line during the divorce proceedings, this huge element of performativity comes into play. In a way it’s fitting, since they both work in theater, but these roles of enemies they suddenly have to perform is also terribly heartbreaking. (Also going back to the contrasts I mentioned earlier between the true essence of their relationship and their easy, ceaseless intimacy; vs the cold-hearted narratives forced on them both through the divorce proceedings.)

But in some ways, they’re not just playing the roles. There are two sides to passion, and just like they once cared about and loved each other so intensely (in some ways, they still do), there is also a shadow side to emotions of that intensity. In a catharsis that is much-needed after the austere, inhumane ways their relationship problems were discussed through their lawyers and absolutely devastating to watch in its destruction, their belated attempt to “talk” escalates into all-out war. “Talking” was the route Charlie first wanted to take – no lawyers involved – but which Nicole spurned. I was frustrated with her throughout the film for never fully communicating with him her expectations regarding their separation, but upon further reflection I understand that she might have feared that if they managed it on their own, it would turn into him managing it and her voice would once again disappear. Something along these lines rushes out during this scene of purging their demons and years of budding resentments and secrets all in one near-fatal blow.

(I’m about to quote a few sporadic lines I remember, but I have to say watching this scene with no idea of the savagery that was coming delivered absolutely lethal power, so I kind of advise not knowing the specific lines? Plus they’re a hundred times more powerful on screen, with these top-tier actors delivering them with every bit of feeling they possess. Skip to after both sets of ///// if you don’t want to know! But quoting here for those who don’t know if/when they’ll see the film ☺ These are definitely not in order and they jump around but whew, every moment when they were screaming these lines is simply unforgettable.)

/////////////////

Charlie: “Oh you just like to play the victim. We were happy. YOU were happy. Until you decided you weren’t anymore.”

Nicole: “You are just like your father!”

Charlie: “Don’t you EVER say that! Don’t you ever compare me to my father. You’re the one just like your mother. And your sister - you’re the worst of all of them combined.”

Nicole: “You slept with Donna!”

Charlie: “One time! Because you stopped having sex with me! For a whole year you shut me out and I didn’t know what to do. And after I gave up so much for you.”

Nicole: “Oh what you gave up?!”

Charlie: “I was in my 20s! I had my first solo work, I was successful, I wanted to fuck everyone but I didn’t. Because I loved you and I didn’t want to lose you. But I- I missed out on so much.”

Nicole: “You are SO selfish, you can’t even separate anything else from your own self-interest! You can’t even see me as something separate from yourself!”

Charlie: “So you hate me! You wish you’d never married me, fine, but god this last year it’s like you hated me!”

Nicole: “And I did! I do! (Screaming helplessly) I can’t believe I have to know you for the rest of my life!!”

Charlie: (Savagely snarling) “Maybe you don’t because I hope you get sick and die. I hope you get hit by a car tomorrow!”

///////////////

This scene escalates and escalates until they’re both in these uncontrollable, violent piques of rage. Charlie punches a hole in the wall, and things simply get uglier and uglier until they are screaming at each other the most horrible things each can think of with every bit of vitriol they can possibly muster. The build up in the scene is masterful, and the performances are simply stellar. You can feel that they are pissed as all hell at each other – that this is literally years of unspoken, repressed feelings all being torn out. But you can also feel that both of them are in such awful pain. Both of them are actively bleeding as the scene progresses, but it’s because both of them still care so much. It’s because there are still feelings there, and there always will be no matter what either of them do. That’s why the emotions are so desperate and searing off the screen.

After Charlie spits the final horrific line in her face, he sinks to the floor and weeps for it. It ends with her comforting him, and him putting his arms around her knees.

And – just fuck me up completely, why don’t you – if you thought that scene was the biggest beating your heart would have to take in this movie, THINK AGAIN BUDDY.

Because. Whew. My god. Words are going to fail me in describing this scene but I’ll do my best to go for it.

Months have passed since their fight, and grab every box of tissues in existence, because here’s the rumored scene where Adam sings “Being Alive” from Company. Now, I had somehow completely forgotten about this going into the film. So when Charlie stands up in the cabaret restaurant with his theatre group back in New York and starts jokingly singing the words when the pianist starts the song, I was just like ‘oh haha he’s singing! Wow!’

Charlie moves to sit back down after the first verse, still mostly fun and games…. But then the words draw him back as the song continues. He gravitates towards the small stage and the microphone, and little by little the joking edge melts away. Emotional gravity rises behind his voice little by little, until suddenly the words are loud and ringing and gorgeous, and there is palpable heartbreak in his eyes as the words begin to take the exact shape of all he has lost.

Now, we’ve heard snippets of Adam singing in Hungry Hearts and Inside Llewyn Davis and even briefly in Burn This. But. People…. You have never heard or seen anything like this. I don’t even mean from Adam. I mean… in your life. I mean: This scene literally stirred such a profound reaction in me; I didn’t know it was possible for an actor to evoke feelings like this. And imagine, this was on-screen performance. The entire theater applauded when the song ended, and I was in tears.

The song encapsulated in truly heartbreaking beauty the revelation Charlie was having of all he once had – every part of love that is both good and bad; cherished and difficult. And in possibly the most tragic contrast of the whole film: He is singing about love making it worthwhile to be alive – of how he’s now essentially left searching for what will now make his life worth living; while across the country Nicole is finally feeling “alive” for the first time, after years of being plagued by the feeling of part of her being dead beyond reach.

Yeah. I could spend thousands of words just trying to describe the devastating power and beauty of this scene, but no matter what words I use or how I phrase it, I’m going to come up short. It’s simply beyond description. Adam is beyond description. You’d think because I literally couldn’t love him more if my life depended on it that I couldn’t be so stunned by new demonstrations of his talent??? But jesus CHRIST. This man is a force that defies comprehension. To my ear, his voice sounded strong but untrained, and that was what made it so heartrendingly magnificent. In the held notes, his voice will crest into the gentlest vibrato as his emotions build, and I couldn’t tell you whether it’s the song that Adam disappears into, or if it’s Adam purposefully weaving every single element at play here into the most moving minutes of performance you’ve ever seen. Either way: The scene will ruin you utterly, and you will love it beyond comprehension.

I know a clip of this scene will certainly hit the internet as soon as the whole film becomes available, but god I almost wish that everyone has to watch it in context with everything that’s come before it. Because knowing every bit that Charlie has suffered along the way, understanding the way his heart is continuously breaking with each of the words-…. God, it’s too much.

Next up on Adam Driver Eviscerates Your Heart And You Thank Him Profusely For It: The scenes where he cries are just as painful as you think they’d be. Probably even more so, because he’s a talented jerk like that who takes no pity on us at all.

The first major crying scene is when he and his lawyer go off into a side room during a break in the first meeting on divorce terms. It’s just dawning on Charlie that Nicole probably has no intent to bring Henry back to New York, and unless Charlie does something serious, Henry might never live there with him again. While the lawyer’s talking, Charlie silently lowers his head, and suddenly the tears just rise up over him. It’s quiet and he only shakes slightly, but god do you feel for him.

The second time is…. lord, yet another moment that’s utterly heartbreaking and yet one of the most beautiful moments of film you’ve ever seen. This is the final scene in the film, and it references back to one of the first, where Charlie and Nicole try to go to a divorce counselor, who requests that they each write down the things they love about the other and then read them aloud. These are the lists each of them voiceover in the trailer and that play at the film’s very beginning. But during this session, Nicole refused to read her list aloud, because she didn’t “like what she wrote.” So Charlie never heard her list about him.

In this final scene, Charlie hears Henry reading something aloud in his bedroom. Henry had been struggling with reading, so Charlie immediately comes in to listen and help him. Charlie sits down on the bed with him, and realizes what it is Henry’s reading. Charlie helps him with the words he can’t pronounce, and then halfway through Henry hands him the list. “You finish reading it, Dad.”

Charlie continues reading the list, and it goes on much longer than the version we heard in Nicole’s voiceover. As Charlie’s reading aloud, Nicole appears in the doorway and begins to listen without Charlie realizing. He manages to read it all relatively evenly… until he reaches the end.

“I fell in love with him…” Charlie stops suddenly, and in an instant his mouth is trembling, the tears are brimming over, and he is fighting desperately to hold back the onslaught of tears in front of his son, even as it overtakes his entire body. Finally, he is able to finish: “I fell in love with him seconds after I saw him, and I’ll always love him. Even if it doesn’t make sense.” In the door, Nicole fights off her own tears.

This film is cinema at its very best. I know this is an incredibly bold statement, but: It just might be Adam’s best role to date.

End Spoilers: Q&A!

I WAS STILL SO STUNNED BY THE SINGING SCENE THAT I ASKED ADAM ABOUT IT AND JUST TO ROUND OUT FROM THE HAND TAKEN VIDEO ABOVE THIS IS THE OFFICIAL ONE AND THAT’S ME YOU CAN JUST BARELY HEAR AT 17:45!!!!!

youtube

CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT HAPPENED??? BECAUSE I CAN’T AND I WAS THERE. BYE I think I’m having an out of body experience taking in the fact that I’m watching this vid of Adam WATCHING ME OMG HE WAS SQUINTING INTO THE AUDIENCE TO SEE ME AND LEANING FORWARD TO HEAR ME SOMEONE HOLD ME I’M WEEPING HE WAS TALKING TO MEASKDFJALKSFJ

Ahem.

From Noah’s comments throughout the panel, it was amazing to hear how much of this movie was truly a collaborative process between him and Adam. In many ways, Noah built this role and film around Adam. He said that he and Adam had focused on the scene of him performing “Being Alive” very early on, and Noah structured the script to work towards that vision. Though he already had the idea of working in themes of performance and theatre, it was Adam’s idea to make Charlie a theatre director. I absolutely love hearing that Noah essentially wanted to make a film where elements of who Adam is in real life or his interests in what he wanted to play in a character were built into the heart of the script.

Someone asked Noah why he likes dysfunctional families so much and he replied “What other kind are there?”

Most of the other things said during the Q&A had already been echoed in other interviews. Plus I sometimes have trouble processing memories while Adam’s talking/standing in front of me because slkdjflsakjfdklsf just taking in the sight of him is a fucking lot to process :’’’’’’’)

“A fucking lot to process” is actually a perfectly apt summary of the day in its entirety! When Sarah and I got back to the hotel, we discovered it had a jacuzzi on the rooftop! That was truly the best soak ever, to soothe away the emotional overload and talk through all of our many, many thoughts on the two stellar films we’d just had the privilege of seeing.

Writing through this entire massive thing was also a huge help to work through all my complex feels about these films. As you might have gathered, I can’t recommend them highly enough. And as you also might suspect – Adam is an absolute force to be reckoned with in both. Seeing two of his most powerful performances ever back to back (and then getting to hear him talk about each in person!) was truly an experience I’ll never forget.

A massive thank you to anyone who persevered through reading all that!! I love writing analyses not only to work through my emotional response to sweeping works like this, but also to remember every bit of the impact. Give it a share if you don’t mind helping a girl out? :) I’m not on twitter at all so it’d be much appreciated!

(...have I mentioned I love Adam and I’m in awe of every single thing he does? Shower this man with Oscars already?!)

#Adam Driver #TIFF #driverdaily #Toronto International Film Festival #The Report #Marriage Story #TIFF 2019

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