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lackspraise · 5 years

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♙ HARRY HAD STOOD IN THE SAME SPOT FOR WHAT SEEMED LIKE HOURS. in the freezing cold of the snow it hadn’t mattered to him. he had to find a way to talk. to vent without an ear that would judge him. he had so much to voice, so much to say after so long. he’d stayed away thanks to what his life had thrown at him -- even if it was mournful and harder than he ever could fathom. hands remained in pockets of the furred coat he wore, sniffing once as he lingered.

he’d spoken about his engagement, his further messes in his drug abuse and alcohol -- how his BEST FRIEND was helping him through it. he’d spoken of his father and what he’d been up to. what DANGEROUS things he’d been doing when norman assumed it’d been behind his back. he spoke of so much before the osborn stood in silence, snow having fallen at the amount and speed that his spot had gained a few inches, burying the snow shoes he wore within the white flurries.

he remained quiet as tears welled up in eyes --- it amounted to frustration of where his life was, how TIRED he was as he wondered how different it could have been if death hadn’t been so swift. been so CRUEL in taking those who didn’t deserve it.

the heir sighs, hand coming to rest and rub against the snowed upon marble, fingers brushing along the etched inscription. silence remained til he stood up in full, looking down upon the grave - stone of his mother. ❝ 'aeyadaan saeidat , al'umu ❞ he murmurs, mother tongue that had been taught being used in her presence, even how little. he turns to leave, to meet back with his driver that had so patiently waited.

❝ 'arak lahiqana. ❞ he voices, yet quieter, snow crunching under feet as he penetrated lower layers -- leaving the sanctuary of calm to return home to unpredictable life.

#{ 1st translation ; arabic ; happy holidays mother }#{ 2nd translation ; arabic ; see you later / soon. }#{ this doesn't have a specific verse because . . this is so general }#♙ ⎛ SOLDIER BOY - VINES AND GREEN WRITINGS | drabbles ⎠

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biotic-raptorian-angel · 6 years

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Scene: Reunion

So many of you have been asking about the relationship between Fareeha and Ana and how she reacted upon finding out Ana is alive. Well...here is the heart breaking story. Enjoy my little seelen. <3

Dedicated to @play-pharah-blogish and @zeraphyrah

The staccato of shined boots settled her mind as she from the nerves of meeting with Angela today, the doctor seemed to have been crying on the phone when she called. Being out in the field on patrol duties made keeping tabs on things in HQ rather difficult, she usually found out details of daily activities second hand from Angela or Moira. So she was curious as to what Angela had to say, but worry sunk itself deep in her chest considering the blonde's shaky voice.

Bold black letters caught her attention as she was now face to face with Dr. Ziegler's personal office door. Raising her metallic hand to clank at the glass gently knocking, she now twisted at the knob and pushed the door open to find it empty. Sighing, she found herself circling the office, never having the moment to truly take in all the awards and commendations Angela had received over the years. But her caramel eyes now landed on a few manila folders across her desk, darting a glance to the open door before picking up a folder. Opening it and seeing the name Amari on the tab, her curiosity got the better of her as she skimmed through the paperwork. Seeing the age confused her, assuming the file was her own medical history. Her brown eyes went wide upon reading further into the file's contents, hands shaking now as the grip on the folder tightened to crumple it around her fingers.

'A. Amari. Previously marked as KIA has been found to have survived her wounds. Extensive damage to entire eye socket and eye itself has caused loss of sight. Commander Morrison has found location and retrieval is scheduled for 12 July. Awaiting further medical examination to be performed personally.'

Fareeha couldn't believe what she was reading, her mother had survived the ambush from Talon and never came back. Angry tears burned in her eyes as she crumpled up the file and threw it across the office. With a low growl, she turned her attention to Angela who was now standing in the doorway with a look of shock upon her soft features.

“Why didn't you tell me Ana was alive? Why did you keep this from me?”

The young doctor clutched her hands together as Fareeha raised her voice in anger, an absolutely normal response considering the situation. All she wanted to do was envelope her in her arms and try to calm her down, but she knew the solider needed space or things would only get worse.

“Jack and I thought it best for her to contact you. I only just found out a few days ago myself.”

Fareeha growled at the words, her teeth gritting as her voice was now deep with anger and tears stream down her cheeks.

“Where is she?”

The blonde hesitated before answering, stepping from the doorway and into the hall knowing full well she was going to hunt her down.

“She is in the Commander's office.”

And with that, her strong legs were off at a blinding speed as she bolted in the direction of that office.

Standing for a few moments at the Commander's door, her entire body shook as an unsteady hand raised itself to knock at the heavy wooden door. Upon hearing the Commander's acknowledgment, she twisted the knob and pushed at the heavy door. Seeing a woman in a long blue uniform coat sitting with her back to the door and Commander Morrison behind his desk, Fareeha raised a hand to salute and stand at attention.

“At ease Amari. I'm surprised to see you in my...”

Before he could finish his sentence, the woman stood and turned to face Fareeha. She had a long all white braid of hair wrapped over her shoulder and tucked into the collar of her coat. An eye patch covered her right eyes, but the signature tattoo under her left gave away exactly who she was. Fareeha's brown eyes went wide with shock, tears returning as she looked on at the ghost of a woman standing before her.

“Al'umu alhakima?”

The woman stepped closer and raised a gloved hand towards the soldier, who flinched as her brow furrowed in anger. Without warning, Fareeha's left hand flew through the space between them and met Ana's right cheek with a hard smack. Ana didn't react aside from a slight gasp and a turning of her head, she knew exactly how Fareeha was feeling and she didn't blame her for reacting like this.

“'Ayuha alsaghir , 'ana asif jiddaan li'anani dhahabat klu hdha alwaqt. I had no choice at first. But by the time it was safe to return, I had gotten word of you joining Overwatch I thought it best to not drag myself into your life. However, recent events with Talon have forced my hand and Jack contacted me directly for a position among the ranks of Overwatch once more.”

Ever word seemed muffled once she switched to English, the stinging on her fingertips and palm still present and distracting enough to keep her grounded. Her eyes shifted to the commander then back to her mother.

“You were gone for nearly twenty years. I thought you were dead. I built you a memorial in Cairo...I visit it every time I have leave from duties. How could you...just leave me like that?”

Her heart found itself in her throat as she fought back the strong urge to crumple to the floor and cry. Before Ana could respond, Fareeha turned on her heel and left the office to rush past Angela standing out in the hallway. Seeing the soldier crying like she was broke the young doctor's heart, but she understood her pain and blue eyes shifted to now glare at Ana inside the office.

“She mourned you this entire time. She blamed herself for not being strong enough to protect you. She became the strong woman she is today to make sure she never loses anyone else she loves. And now you have truly broken her worse than if you would've stayed dead to her.”

Ana's gaze fell to the floor, no sign of regret or sadness in those time worn features as she nodded to Jack and stepped from the office.

“I can only hope that she forgives me some day. I had to see her though. I had to see my little Horus grown up.”

With those words, the old soldier set off down the hallway in the opposite direction with her head hung low.

#fareeha #ana #pharah #ana amari #overwatch #rp scenes #this seriously made me cry as I wrote it #angela #mercy #pharmercy

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iwriteficsnottragediesladies · 7 years

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Soldier Girl pt 8

A/N: Okay, here’s the next chapter. So, what really is the reader’s story and what happened to her overseas? I cried multiple times while writing this because it is so real to me. I have ptsd and although my trauma was different than the reader’s, her struggle and feelings are truly my experience as well. I wrote this from the heart, so I hope that’s okay.

@multifandom-slytherin

@toystorytwowasokay

@beeboatthedxsco

@melonandtheirfictionalcharacters

tw: talking about ptsd, explaining trauma, happy ending

It was a day off. You were just sitting around in the hotel room with Brendon, cuddling and watching the marathon of Law and Order playing on tv. Suddenly, Brendon speaks quietly.

“You know,” Brendon started, “We’ve never really talked about it.” You look to him.

“What?” You asked, but you were pretty sure where he was going.

“Every time you have nightmares, it’s the same dream, isn’t it?” He asked somberly. You swallow uncomfortably.

“Yeah,” you whisper, “It is.”

“Have you ever told anyone what it’s about?” He asked concerned, wondering if you had ever really processed it.

“No,” You whisper even more quietly.

“You know you can tell me anything, right?” He asks sweetly. You pause and look down at the sheets.

“Bren,” You say and slowly shake your head, “You… You wouldn’t…”

“I wouldn’t what, baby? I wouldn’t understand?” He softly urges you to continue.

“No. You wouldn’t…” You try so hard to get the words out and tears were filling your eyes. “You wouldn’t want to be with me anymore,” You say your worst fear out loud so quietly that you wonder if you had truly made a sound at all. Brendon exhales in response, so you know that he did in fact hear you.

“Y/n, I want to be with you,” Brendon says with certainty, “There’s nothing you could say to change that.”

“But what if it did?” You reply with tears ready to flow. You thought over the risk of telling him again and shook your head. “Brendon, I can’t lose you,” You say desperately.

“You are not going to lose me,” Brendon stated, “We are here. In this hotel room. We got here in a series of events so crazy… We found each other, and we did not get this far to lose each other, Y/n.”

“Brendon,” You said, ready to give in. You need to talk about it. You needed to get it off your chest. You can’t take it anymore.

“Y/n, you don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to,” Brendon prefaced softly, “But just know–I never want to lose you. No matter what.”

You pause for a few seconds.

“We were out in the field, doing community outreach,” You begin.

Brendon realizes you’re sharing your story. He listens closely.

“Handing out food, water, to the locals. There was this little girl, about eight. A lot of times, people wouldn’t want to accept our help. They were in a dangerous situation–becoming friendly with us could put a target on their backs. But this little girl–” You pause with a small chuckle, remembering her electric smile. “This little girl stepped out of the crowd and ran over to me. She wrapped her arms around my legs in a hug.”

“The rest of the locals decided to take a chance on us too, and took our help. She looked up and said ‘tabdu waka'anaha ‘umiy‘. I don’t know a lot of Arabic, but one of the villagers who was beside me picking up a supply pack told me ‘she said you remind her of her mother. She died not too long ago.’”

Tears started to stream down your face as the pain of the memory floats back to you.

“I thought maybe, just maybe, I was making a difference in the world. That all the long days of training and sacrifice were finally making my life worthwhile. Then there was an explosion. It wasn’t big, but it was close. Everyone ran in different directions. Shooters came out of nowhere. It was enough to drive our troop back to the helicopter. I heard the blades firing up, but then I heard a noise, a small little cry next to me. The little girl.”

“S-she was laying on the ground, hit. I tried–” You cut off, your voice cracking and tears streaming. “I put pressure on the wound. I thought maybe… Maybe we could get her to the infirmary or… But one of my guys was pulling me off of her, screaming that we needed to go.”

“I didn’t want to leave her, but he wasn’t going to leave me there to die either. I heard the little girl as he dragged me away. She screamed ‘al'umu‘”

“Mommy.”

“She was screaming for me. She thought that I was her mother, leaving her in her last moments, Brendon,” You lose control of your tears and you’re not calm enough to have some composure at all. “I can’t stop thinking about her, dreaming about her,” you sob, “I killed her.”

You had finally said everything out loud. You’re completely lost in your pain and panic, barely even coherent anymore.

“Y/n,” Brendon tries to stop you.

“I killed her,” You repeat, interrupting. You feel like you can’t breathe. It feels like the walls are closing in on you.

Brendon just pulls you closer and holds you. You whimper and try to get out of his grip but Brendon won’t let you go.

“Shhh,” Brendon said as he held you tighter, “Y/n.”

You’re still trying to get out of his grip.

“I can’t stop these memories, Brendon,” You cry out, “Please, make it stop.”

“Easy, baby, easy.” he soothes, keeping his grip firm. He sniffles. You realize he is crying too. When had he started crying? “It’s going to be okay.” You start to get worn out and slow down a bit.

“Make it stop, make it stop,” you repeat quietly, withdrawing into yourself. You give up your fight and become limp.

He can’t stand seeing you this way. He would do anything to take away your pain.

“Just breathe baby,” Brendon replied calmly, “You’re okay.”

You do your best to follow his directions. You cough and sputter, trying to breathe through your sobs. He smooths back your hair.

“I’m a terrible p-person,” You whisper against his chest.

“Please don’t say that, Y/n,” Brendon begs you, his own voice cracking now. “It’s okay, baby,” He places a kiss on the top of your head with a sniffle.

“I’m so sorry Brendon,” You say through your tears. “What I did…” You trail off, too ashamed to finish your sentence.

You look up at his face now dripping with tears, confused that he was still even talking to you. You don’t understand. You did something unforgivable. You are disgusting. He should fire you and do away with you entirely–you don’t deserve any of what he has given you. Yet here you were, being held in his arms.

“You did what you had to do to survive,” Brendon finished for you.

“No, I could’ve… I…” You trail off again, unsure of what to say.

“There was nothing you could have done,” Brendon said quietly, shaking his head. “It’s awful. It’s war. It’s terrible. But it wasn’t your fault, Y/n.”

You had never talked about it before, so it never occurred to you that maybe it wasn’t your fault. You had always believed that you should have done more. What happened was absolutely tragic. But it’s true–you did everything you could.

It wasn’t your fault.

“Y/n,” Brendon started, looking deeply into your eyes, “Everywhere you go, you light up the room. You do so much good in this world. It’s how hard you work, the way you care about other people, even just the way you talk to fans… You share your love with the world in a way I’ve never seen,” He pauses to sniffle and then smiles through his tears, “When I look at you, I don’t see ptsd, or your past–every time I see you, I see the beautiful person you are.”

You are in shock. You search his face for uncertainty, but you find sincerity in every word he speaks. This is not what you expected. You expected him to be disgusted, to realize you are not the person he thinks you are.

“Brendon,” You look at him, speechless. He places his hand on your cheek and looks at you.

“Y/n, I love you,” he emphasizes to convince you of how he feels.

The world stops turning. You wonder if your heart has stopped or if it’s just beating too fast to feel it at all.

“You have been through things that no one should ever have to face,” He shakes his head, “But you are strong, and I’m so lucky to have you in my life, Y/n. I can’t imagine it without you anymore. And I love you.”

“I love you too,” you whispered what you had known all along. Your eyes refilled with tears of a new kind. You lip trembled. “I love you so much Brendon,” your voice now full volume as you burst into tears all over again.

You crawled into his lap completely and he latched onto you. You feel so safe in his arms.

“I love you baby,” Brendon coos, “You mean everything to me.”

“I love you too, Brendon,” You reply, feeling yourself melting into his chest.

“It’s okay, baby,” Brendon ran his hand through your hair, “I’m right here. I’m not going anywhere.”

Oxygen is finally filling your lungs. The truth is out in the open and Brendon loves you all the same. You have never felt so complete. In minutes you’re asleep against him, exhausted from your full blown panic attack.

But you can rest your head easy knowing: It wasn’t your fault, and Brendon Urie is in love with you.

A/N: I hope you liked this. I kind of put myself out there a bit, but I feel like sharing my feelings through the reader might give a window into my world for you all. Plot line suggestions are always welcome. I have one from an anon that I plan on using for the next chapter, so I love when you guys contribute.

Read the next part here: https://iwriteficsnottragediesladies.tumblr.com/post/166217033758/soldier-girl-part-9

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