I'm still not over this look Raphael gives Tav after she says "I don't think he knows." while discussing the infernal script of a contract at Last Light Inn.

Raphael: Your cooking is perfect as always, Solomon. I would marry you in a instant if it meant I can have it for the rest of my life.

Solomon: Haha you flatter me, Rapha--!?

Raphael: *already pulled out a ring*

Solomon: Oh god, you're serious.

Raphael: Make me the happiest angel alive and accept my proposal please?

Solomon: I...uh...Have plans to marry MC in the future?

Raphael: I was prepared for that...

Raphael: *pulls out another ring*

Solomon: ...

Solomon: ...MC? DARLING? CAN YOU COME OVER FOR A MOMENT PLEASE??

I wonder if we’ve been interpreting what Haarlep said about Raphael being bad at sex wrong all along. Like maybe by some standards, Raphael is really good at sex.

Maybe Raphael is the most unstoppable orgasm-giving machine this side of the Mississippi but Haarlep can’t stand that it’s always accompanied by poetry and musical theater.

Maybe Raphael’s dirty talk all has to rhyme and he has to wave his arms around theatrically while he does it. Same for any excited utterances.

When Raphael orgasms, he’s not a screamer. No, that is too common for the son of Mephistopheles. Every time Raphael busts a nut, he bursts out into singing show tunes at full volume. Thats not to say he doesn’t sing through the rest of sex, but you know he’s climaxed when the song has.

That’s why he comes so quickly. Most songs don’t last longer than 5-10 minutes. He can’t wait too long and miss his cue. The timing is intentional. He’s practiced it until it was perfect.

Yeah I hate him. But I'm shameless so it doesn't stop me

Raph has no qualms about hitting anyone, but it's funny how he usually restricts the repeated onslaughts to the shells

Dee-Evolution Raph is the designated turtle caretaker. He says it's just because he's the only one in his family who actually knows how to take care of a turtle, but it's also because he's really the biggest softie of all of them and wants to make sure his very vulnerable little brother is safe... this may apply to alternate universe versions of him, apparently!

Holy cow the lost and found is so crowded: @red-rover-au, @phoebepheebsphibs, @genderfluid-envy, @peanutrat20, @xmochaccinox, @riseleon, @rattraptmnt, @nights-flying-fox, @lost-in-the-pink-mist, @littlemissartemisia, @reagi-df, and of course the star @xxlea-nardoxx! Feel free to follow up on this if you'd like! <3

@tmntaucompetition

followup to this. he's not getting away that easily

Imagine the father you hate sends you a talking sex toy

It may be born from expecting some cunning and twisted games from devils (where is the fun, otherwise?), but to merely take Raphael's and Haarlep's relationship the very way it's presented without further thought appears like signing the line without reading the words to me. What they do there clearly has layers. Raphael is smart, he has to be for those contracts, the manipulations, and his little ambitious plan. Furthermore, it's essential for him to stay careful. He, more than anyone, should know not to trust Haarlep. And he most certainly is highly aware. Imagine you want to surpass your fiendish father and he gifts you a toy incubus. What would you do with them? I, at least, know what I would not do with this gift: Order it to take the form(s) of those I most desire (or, worse, cherish to a point) or even fuck it. Now, Raphael is a devil (with a strong human side, fight me, but still a devil): of course, he fucks Haarlep anyway and maybe not to appear ungrateful too (after all, you want Daddy to think you appreciate his gift or at least paint the surface-level impression of it). But he only fucks Haarlep in quite a special way, does he not? - In the one and only way that gives nothing away about him. Or at least it gives nothing away about him that his father (and anyone, really) doesn't already know (or is supposed to know): That Raphael has a very high opinion of himself. Maybe it's even an abstract little joke. I, for my part, see some dry humor in it: His daddy sends this shapeshifting, form stealing incubus spy to get some information on how to pressure his son, should it become a necessity. But all he gets from said incubus spy is the statement that his son only ever fucks himself. "Raphael only loves Raphael." That definitely is what I would want my incubus sex toy to report back to my detested father. (If I was a devil, mind you.) Now Raphael doesn't put that much effort into the act, it seems, but that's not truly necessary after all and only serves him further: I don't think he fancies Haarlep gossiping about his actual sexual preferences with Mephistopheles either. Ah, now maybe Haarlep and Raphael despise each other or maybe they developed a fondness for each other, I can picture both, but it stays true that Raphael doesn't seem like the kind of man who would willingly allow someone to gain an advantage over him by allowing personal information to spread to those he's determined to outsmart. Of course, I guess, it's also a possibility that this 1000+-years-old cambion truly only ever lazily bottoms for his father's incubus toy and only ever while it looks (more or less) like himself because that's all he wants in this regard. Maybe devils are immune to boredom. I, for my part, strongly assume it's a game with daddy dearest.

weird jumbled kid gort thoughts…

something deeply funny about this hyper intelligent kid who probably only ever has called his parents by their first names since he could talk. imagining him doing most of the important bureaucratic paperwork as a fucking. 10 year old because he just thinks his parents are too incompetent for this task. scariest 10 year old on the planet saves his parents’ business/whatever the fuck from bankruptcy not even because he cares about it or something he just REALLY hates being associated with any sort of failure lol.

also. love that gort (20 int) is so much smarter than a literal devil (raph 14 int) lol

what if they where T4T?! What then?

for the raphael girlies ❤️‍🔥😈❤️‍🔥

[from the blossoming romance prompt series - it was supposed to be fluff idk what happened]

read on ao3

...

Gortash's coronation was an ostentatious, vulgar display of power, and she hated every minute of it. She held back with her companions, loathe that they were expected to be at this ball. Spending time in fancy dress when there were far more pressing matters at hand.

Not that she didn't appreciate her fancy dress, she wore a gown in a deep burgundy that shimmered like a thousand stars. It draped over her body like liquid, she might have been hesitant to wear something that showed so much, but she had to admit she had never felt this beautiful. Her and her companions' clothing for the evening had been dropped off at their camp, she assumed from Gortash, couldn’t have them showing up in armor and ruining this evening.

Alas, a world of expectations, alliances, and a million other things she didn't care about demanded their presence and attention.

What was stopping her from slitting his throat right here, she wondered. Now that would be a display of power.

She leaned against the stone wall and nursed her glass of wine. She hated the stuff, but what she had wasn't half bad. She surveyed the crowd, casually considering how many purses she could lighten if the mood struck.

As she continued to scan the room her eyes fell on a set that was peering right back at her.

Raphael.

She let his eyes sink into her soul as she brought her glass to her lips, taking a long drink and noting the way his eyes fell to her lips as she pulled the glass away.

“I'll be back.” She said to no one in particular, setting her glass aside and pushed off the wall.

She strode across the room, purposely taking her time. She knows that being attracted to a devil is a terrible decision, but right now she didn't care. She looked good, she felt good, and a little bit of flirting never hurt anyone.

“Something catch your eye, little mouse?” He takes one last sip of his wine before setting the glass aside.

“You were staring, I thought I'd come indulge you.” Her voice was casual, a contrast to the warmth building within her.

He just gave a casual hmph, his silence proving her right.

“Speaking of indulging, I see you're enjoying the dress I had delivered.” His eyes roamed her body, taking in how the shimmery fabric coated every curve.

“It was you?” She allowed herself to show some surprise, knowing he'd enjoy the small win. “I should have known the little lord would never have this good of taste.” She ran her hands down her body, enjoying how he couldn't stop his eyes from following her hands.

“Thank you, darling. I'd like to think there a great many things I can do better than him.” He stared into her soul, a challenge and a promise behind his gaze.

So he knew, she thought to herself, about just how favorable she had been with the tyrant.

He let his hand drift to her lower back, pulling her ever so slightly into him, and she made no effort to resist. She let the silence linger as she took in his scent, cherries were her favorite.

She leaned further into him, resting her hand on his chest, while her eyes flitted between his own and his lips, her thoughts venturing somewhere unholy.

“Tell me, Raphael…” His name flowing from her tongue while her body was pressed to his awoken something within him. “Do you think he's seen us?” His arm instinctively pulls her flush to him, the slightest surprised gasp coming from her as he wraps around her. “Do you think he'll be angry? Jealous? Do you think he's watching now?” His jaw tightens at this, a possessiveness she knew was lurking making its appearance. She reaches out and glides a finger along his jaw, grasping his chin and turning it towards her, his lips mere inches from hers. “Raphael? Indulge me further, please.” Her voice was quiet, a hint of neediness to it that he was now clinging to.

“He is most definitely watching.” He reaches up, cupping her cheek and pulling her closer, his lips lightly brushing hers. Every thought in her brain is consumed by the devil now, his touch lighting a fire she hadn't realized had long been extinguished.

“Let's give him a show.” Raphael says before crashing his lips into hers, his tongue teasing at the seam of her lips before he pulls away. He takes pride in her breathlessness and the way he has to support more of her weight than before the kiss. They can hear the crash of a thrown glass across the ballroom, though now it matters not. Now that they've tasted each other, that was the only thing they cared about.

“Come, dear, I would like that dress back.” He took her hand, leading them from the ballroom and into the night.

Baldur’s Gate 3 - 16/? - Palmarosa - Astarion/Raphael

Title: Palmarosa Rating: Explicit Pairing: Astarion/Raphael Tags: (Check AO3 for the full list) Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Deals with a devil, Contracted sexual slavery, Bad BDSM etiquette, PTSD, Communication issues, Flashbacks, Trauma recovery and Retraumatisation, Dark and disturbing themes, Blood consumption, Minor character death, Canon typical violence, Dominance/submission, Top Raphael, Bottom Astarion etc.

Summary: (Set post-game / end-game) The love of Astarion’s life has disappeared to go live in the daylight with the druids, and Astarion is stuck in the darkness once more, yearning for sunlight with every fibre of his being, while bitterly reflecting on all the things that were denied to him in the end - love, sunlight, the option to kill thousands of people and become a near-god…

Raphael knows Astarion’s desperate, and comes to him with not one, but two horrid contract offers that Astarion loathes and dreads in equal measure - but the prize at the end of both are too good to turn down, and he’s become too cynical to care about how much of a good idea it is to give his body to a devil for a month or two, because really, comparatively, how bad could it be?

Palmarosa (Baldur’s Gate 3) - Raphael/Astarion - 16 - Chemical Blood and Carrion Musk

In which Astarion meets Mephistopheles for the first time and goes from 'oh he's hot' to 'holy crap he's terrifying' to '...shit watching Raphael and Mephistopheles snark at each other is wonderful' to 'OH SHIT SHIT SHIT'

let's talk about the 87 turtles' shell patterns in the intro because girl what

( ・∇・)

Thinking about the “Careful. That’s my Father you’re speaking about, boy.” line now. Because like. Raphael is the one angel with the perspective of “god is dead/so far out of the picture and not coming back that he is functionally dead to all of us anyway” so you’d think that they wouldn’t care if Dean is an asshole about it. Or at least, that they’d care dean is being an asshole and flippant to them, an archangel deserving his respect, but maybe not so much a little blasphemy because well. God doesn’t care about even the important things, so what’s a little quip from dean winchester?

“That’s my Father.” it’s like. “That’s my Father.” He left home and never came back. He abandoned Heaven, and he abandoned Michael, and he abandoned Raphael. He left. No instructions and a world to run. And Dean Winchester is making jokes while he stands at the epicenter of a godless universe.

It’s more personal here, right? In the show, there’s God, that amorphous idea of something all-powerful that made the world and skipped out on it, and then God, the father who had some kids and went out to get milk and cigarettes and didn’t come home. Venn diagram with a lot of crossover, but what starts in this scene, I think, as talking about the former and only the former, very quickly shifts into being about the latter. Dean’s taking the grandiose, the “Who ran off and disappeared. Who left no instructions and a world to run.” and turning it into the mundane, “Daddy ran away and disappeared. He didn't happen to work for the post office, did he?”

I’m not sure where I’m going with this. Just that there’s a difference between an insult to God as God and an insult to God as the father to angels, and the way Raphael responds to the latter, the way Dean is able to rile them up by pushing that interpretation into the conversation, is interesting to me. Careful. That’s their Father you’re talking about. A deadbeat dad is still their dad.

You can interpret this as a stand-alone or a part 2 to the last comic b/c this is in future Leo’s perspective.

Though this a more part 2.5 since there is more I wanted to add, but I got a busy day tomorrow.

also, can you all read my handwriting or should I add captions? Anyways, enjoy and see you tomorrow, babs!