Raphael: I am very cool and normal about everything actually. Look how very cool and suave I am. /beats Astarion in a tantrum five seconds later/

Raphael: I bet you didn't know a theatre arts kid could do this /puts a significant stake into a theatre so he can have his own theatre performances where he's the only one in the audience whenever he wants/

Raphael: I'm very normal about my dad. Idk why you want me to talk about him. I'm sorry? No I don't know Mephistopheles. Who is she?

Raphael: Lolololol torture

Raphael: Don't ask where all the fresh fruit comes from or how much energy or effort I put into constantly procuring it, no it's not a thing I have.

Raphael: Fhaeleb scares me and I don't know why.

Raphael: I feel like if I tortured her she'd scream with that e.e look on her face and I think that would be fun for about five seconds and then frankly somewhat annoying also she has radiant power and that gives me the heebie jeebies.

Raphael: Astarion's looking more fashionable these days. In my clothing. I am completely normal about this.

Raphael: Hey who do I remind you of *sips red wine on the House of Hope balcony* a very cool person, right? Haha. Yes.

Raphael: You know that game 'gotcha nose!' - It's that, but with your soul.

Raphael: This bitch /slaps himself/ can fit so many nursery rhymes in him.

Raphael: /reading the dictionary again/ I really should use the word tenebrous and dubiety more often.

Raphael: Did you know I can sing? Oh. Just normal things. I just sing about totally normal things.

I have had Palmarosa by @not-poignant on the brain for several months now and I may or may not have started this account for the main purpose of being able to send him some art :D

Thinking about Cassandra and Cullen. Their friendship. How Cassandra knows Cullen—knows him for his achievements, his capabilities, his leadership—and doesn't question how that slots in with the insecurity churning just below the surface. The self-loathing he confides in her, the doubt he feels in himself—how she sees this, accepts it, and then compares him to a god. Finds beauty in his duality and dubs it holy.

She doesn't coddle him. Her love isn't soft and laced with empty platitudes. She sees Cullen's struggles—empathizes with them—and confronts them with a brutal concern that offends the lack of care Cullen shows himself. Her love is raw and sharp and packs a punch.

And I think it's what Cullen needs. I think it's that direct honesty that makes it harder for Cullen to dismiss her words when she says he's worth his weight in gold.

Actually you know what

You know what

I’m not done talking about Palmarosa, it’s been slowly bouncing around the corners of my head like a screensaver logo nonstop and I am telling you again to go check it out.

This is one of those fics where it’s like, it’s not even about the fandom or the pairing or anything like that, it’s amazing literature to read just on its own, it’s making me think thoughts and feel feelings. I had to go take a little cry break halfway through reading and that’s how you just know you found something good. Here is what you’re getting:

The wonderful paradox of an older character who feels fucking tired and spent cause they’ve seen it all yet somehow they feel inexperienced and afraid at the same time

Such sharply-observed descriptions of the little stupid things one does when one is used to violence and abuse, like trying to goad someone into getting angry at you because dealing with the anger is less awful than dealing with that feeling of anticipation of what’s coming

D/s that’s interesting and good (and even gentle, for now!) and makes me wanna cry and doesn’t sound like it was written by a 20-something who has never actually done this / is desperately appealing to the purity police she says, without a trace of bitter frustrated spite in her voice no not at all

Possibly a praise kink in the works? Do you know how hard it is to find an actual praise kink and not just someone saying good boy/girl a couple times and then we move on? Why is that such a hard thing for people to write / tag properly? she says, and no it is not bitter frustration oh no not at all

An unusual pairing that I honestly never thought of before, which is good for you, you need variety in your diet, try the unusual vegetables my friends, you never know, you might find something you like

The most interesting play within a play (well, within a book?) that I’ve ever read

Baths, food, howl’s green slime

And coming up in the next chapter apparently: Mephi-fucking-stopheles

It’s 15 chapters so far and honestly feels like it’s just got started, there’s still so many wonderful things that can happen or go wrong, my goodness. It’s smart and amazing and I am telling you again to read it.

Alright here we go, thank you @feedthefandomfest for the tag! Trying to figure out how I want to organize this but we'll figure it out as we go.

Here's my Comment Fest Bingo card so far!

A fic posted in the past 3 days: A Stain That Won't Dissolve by thespectaclesofthor (ao3)/not-poignant (tumblr) Fandom: Stardew Valley Pairing: Alex/Sebastian I count the last chapter posted in the past 3 days as counting for this.

A WIP: Remind Me by OctoberNight (ao3) Fandom: Stardew Valley Pairing: Sebastian/OC, Harvey/OC

A fic with lopsided kudos to comment ratio: insufferable by tatesu (ao3) Fandom: My Hero Academia Pairing: Dabi/Reader

A comment that is AT LEAST half keysmash: Don't Take the Wheel by snailmail444 (ao3, tumblr) Fandom: Stardew Valley Pairing: Sebastian/OC

Holy Trinity: kudos, comment, & bookmark: Valley Baby by head_hedgehog (ao3).headhedgehog (tumblr) Fandom: Stardew Valley Pairing: Sebastian/OC

A comment detailing emotional devestation: On Watching the Man you Love, Love Someone Else by /saturnsorbits Fandom: My Hero Academia Pairing: Sero/Reader

Tagged by @yletylyf, thank you!!

Three Ships: oh not gonna surprise anyone here, but Nikolai/Aleksander (GV), Alina/Aleksander (GV) and Alucard/Sypha/Trevor (Castlevania) for old times' sake

First Ever Ship: Eomer/Lothiriel (LOTR)

Last Song: Le Solstice by Karkwa

Last Film: Barbie? I think?

Currently Reading: going thru my A03 bookmarks because I need that very curated type of comfort reread, so I'm currently reading The Wind that Cuts the Night by thespectaclesofthor for the 10th time (at least)

Currently Watching: the bf playing Fallout 4 like we're back in 2015, but series-wise, absolutely nothing ;_;

Currently Consuming: homemade chocolate chips cookie right out of the oven

Currently Craving: green tea to balance all that sugar

Tagging @theonewiththeory, @shirayuki7, @viridessense, @shadow-of-a-thought, @inahandful-of-dust and anyone else who wanna share a tid bit of their everyday life!

I decided to read the rarepair fic because the tags promised dark problematic kink, torturing one of my favorite characters until he cries or comes, sometimes both.

Now I ship it. GODS DAMMIT.

Palmarosa by thespectaclesofthor

i need to give a shoutout to one of my favorite fics i'm reading rn, Palmarosa by thespectaclesofthor on AO3 (i know they have a tumblr too but i can't remember it; anyway the fic in its entirety is posted there, not here!)

raphael x astarion is a rare pairing iirc but i really love the dynamic in this series so far

it's .... hwuf~

also for gods' sake read the warnings, it does cross into the noncon/dubcon territory quite frequently and that may not be everyone's style (though it is treated rather masterfully in the writing, imo)

71 + 81 for the DA ask list? 👀

Thank you! 💕

71. Did you read the novels?

I’ve read The Stolen Throne and to be perfectly honest it was quite disapointing which is why I put off reading more. I’ve also bought The Calling and The Masked Empire but haven’t forced myself to get through them yet. (Though to be fair, I think I expected way too much from The Stolen Throne. But still...)

81. Favorite fanfic?

“Stuck on a puzzle” by  thespectaclesofthor - I think this is the only fandom in which I have such a quick and definitive answer but I have to say, this is one of my favorite fanfics of all time, all fandoms, etc. It’s not only so very well written but also accidentally so perfectly tailored to everything I ever wanted from a fic about Cullen. Perfection.

(There are others I like *a lot* and several I keep rereading but if I need to pick one, there’s no competition.)

Everyone please feel free to send me more asks for this ask meme. It would mean a lot to me and I’m sick and feeling poorly, so I welcome your pity. ;)

‘No, of course you’re right,’ Zagreus said, feeling like he swallowed the same mouthful of ale several times before it finally went down. ‘Of course. I’m sorry for upsetting you.’

Achilles stood too, the movement fluid and swift. He reached out like he wanted to place a hand on Zagreus’ forearm before he pulled back.

‘Please,’ Achilles said. ‘As someone who has spent too long alone before finding what I needed in this afterlife. Don’t do the same. If not me, then talk to someone. The people here care for you, lad.’

‘I know,’

Daily excerpt from today's writing, chapter 22 of Palmarosa:

‘Poor thing,’ Raphael said, smile widening further. ‘Just one cuff? You can’t even hide how it affects you, can you? Goodness gracious, little one, whatever will you do if I get you into four?’ ‘Yes, well, do I actually need to be here for the part where you gloat and make threats, or shall I just pretend you’ve said them and do away with the need?’ ‘I’m giving you what you want, darling,’ Raphael said, pulling Astarion closer as he stepped towards one of the portals. ‘We’re going on a discovery to find out what true submission means. I hope you’re in the mood for an adventure.’ ‘And what if I’m-’ Astarion’s voice was cut off by the uncomfortable experience of moving through the light blue portal, and then having his breath punched out of him by the sudden, searing cold. Raphael laughed low next to him, and leaned against his back, wrapping both arms around him, exhaling unusually warm breath against the back of his neck. Even now he kept one hand around that cuff, as Astarion stared at the rebuilt city of Luskan, and realised from the smell of the seawater and the distant sweet malodourous reek of rotting fish that they were on the Southern Bank. A few people nearby who packed crates into caravels and cogs turned to look at them, but seeing as they were pirates, they got back to their business, and left Raphael and Astarion to theirs. Astarion wondered if they were not worth robbing, looking as fancy as they did, but perhaps Raphael gave off an energy. ‘Do you like cold cities?’ ‘I like pirate cities,’ Raphael said, squeezing Astarion in his arms. From a distance, they probably looked like two lovers, one embracing the other from behind to keep him nicely warm by a freezing cold sea. ‘Ah, of course. I rather like pirate cities too,’ Astarion murmured. ‘Vagabonds are fun.’ ‘Aren’t they just?’ Raphael said, laughing. ‘Scoundrels too.’

Palmarosa chapter 3 by @not-poignant "raphael looked at him pityingly" yeah I bet he did. I would too

Hi I am just here to tell you how I fucking adore Stuck on the Puzzle. I love it so so much, it beginning to end has my whole entire heart. I love Cullen and His Issues™️, and Bull who somehow got picked as the one to sort through them. Cullen’s emotional dumbassery and Bull’s refusal to play into his bullshit is just *chef’s kiss.* This fic is everything I never knew I needed. Thank you so so much. ❤️❤️❤️❤️

This took me forever to answer because I always forget to check asks here (and I don't get email notifs for them on this account) BUT THANK YOU SO MUCH dlskajfdsafksad I'm so so glad you enjoyed it!

Fabulous fic rec here friends:

Happily ever after is great sometimes, but sometimes your heart needs something different. What if BG3 didn’t end with a happily ever after for Astarion, but instead he’s been left behind by Tav, left behind by everyone else, and in this sad state is particularly vulnerable to being talked into a strange contract with everyone’s favourite stupid bastard cambion?

This is ongoing and written by @not-poignant and it really is something else. I adore the premise, I adore the writing, the characterization is prefect, please go have a read.

After a while of standing there, aimlessly, he walked towards the back of the house, the garden that he knew waited beyond a second, more formal living room. He heard Hank get up and follow him, wondered if Hank thought he was escaping. But Hank’s footsteps were slow, and Connor ended up standing barefoot in a large circle of green grass, with a rusting swing set in one corner, circled by the new strains of roses that didn’t die of fungal rot in the face of constant rains and sticky humidity.

It wasn’t their season, but one was still gamely flowering, the blossoms cheerful and pale pink. The sky above was clear for once, and Connor looked up at it, breathing in air that still felt wet somehow. The land giving up its water as vapour.

He didn’t turn to see if Hank watched him. He stood and looked at everything alive, and almost laughed, because this was so much nicer than his apartment. It was even nicer than the house he’d grown up in. He was dizzy and sore, his knees still hurt, he couldn’t get Hank’s voice out of his head:

‘You humans are so fucking fragile.’

Maybe that was true. But Connor hadn’t gone to an organisation to get his memories wiped out of his head. Not at any point in his life. He drank too much, did stupid things, but never that. So their fragility was shared, just different.

Someone else would have better judgement about it all, but Connor wasn’t someone else, and that closed the door on it.

He startled when his phone buzzed in his pocket, and drew it out, feeling queasy at the thought that it might be Zlatko.

No. His father. The name Richard Perkins came up in his phone.

He answered, feeling abruptly shaky. He pressed the phone to his ear, and before he could speak:

‘Connor, where the fuck are you?’

Finally finished my third illustration for “Eversion” by thespectaclesofthor @ AO3. It’s inspired by the end-scene from the the 10th chapter.

I don’t know who still even is alive on tumblr, but hey, I made an Eversion playlist! @not-poignant :3