#The ultimate dramatic gay
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sometimes I wonder if elias breathed a sigh of relief upon hiring jon and discovering that he has finally hired an archivist who will match his level of drama.
gertrude did not fuck with that. gertrude interrupted elias' evil monologues, literally just lit shit on fire if all else failed, and ignored the eye's efforts altogether.
jon, on the other hand rapidly went from "none of this is real, you are all lying to me" to "oh god, oh fuck, oh god" to "I am undeserving of existence" in an alarmingly short period of time.
he did the monologues. he had the existential crisis. he was the ultimate dramatic disaster gay.
#the magnus archives#jonathan sims#elias bouchard#gertrude robinson#the archivist#the other significantly more dramatic archivist#don't get me wrong#I love jon#but he's a wreck
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52,54,32, and 37 on the prompt list with melissa schemmenti pls😩🙏🏼
Mommy Knows Best ~Dark!Mommy!Melissa Schemmenti xFem CollegeStudent!Reader
Summary— Reader has been best friends with Melissa’s daughter, Abigail Schemmenti, and she has always butted head with Melissa… One fateful holiday break changes it all. Anon Response— Hi hi anon!! Thank you for the request! Absolutely. This went a little dark, but also a good amount of smut. Hope you Enjoy! ♥️
Mommy… Master List
Requests & Prompt-List
#52. “Fuck… Mommy! … Oh my, I’m so sorry, it just… slipped out…?”
#54. “You can call me Mommy/Daddy if you want too…”
#32. Enemies to lovers troupe
#37. Best Friend’s Mom Troupe
Warnings: NSFW, 18+!!!, heavy smut, dark fic, fingering, strap-on riding, age gap (all legal), enemies to lovers, best friends mom, degradation, praise, smutty smut, mommy kink, degradation kink, praise kink, overstimulation, overstimulation kink, teasing, taunting, implied future smut, etc.
Enjoy (;
“Hey An’ you gonna keep that door open, right Abigail??” Your best friend’s mother shouted from the kitchen.
You rolled your eyes lightly at Melissa’s, as she insisted you call her, comment, as Abi, your bff, yelled back at her mother.
“Ughhhh Mooooooom, I’m not in high school anymore!!” Abigail yelled from her bedroom on the ground floor, “And I’m not even gay!!!”
“Doesn’t matta’!!! I am your mother, Abigail Ruth Schemmenti, and you will leave that door open!!” Melissa’s thick accent boomed through the house.
Now it was Abigail’s turn to roll her eyes, as you looked at her in apology for what she had to deal with.
“Fineeeee!!” Your best friend shrieked back, leaving the door to her bedroom ajar, before turning her attention back to you.
“It’s not like I would do anything anyway…” you grumbled in annoyance, from the edge of Abi’s childhood bed, “I don’t like you like that…”
Abigail came to sit on the edge next to, leaving against the headboard as she rolled her eyes once more.
“I know, my mom, she’s just… ughhhhh!!” Abigail groaned, squeezing her fists together dramatically in the air.
“Yea…” you chuckled, “At least you don’t have to see her much anymore… well except holidays and breaks…” you comforted her.
Abigail sighed.
“That’s true… Anyways, to you…” she said, quickly changing the topic to something more upbeat and less tension filled,
“You still banging that hot redhead…?” Abigail said in a low tone, while wiggling her eyebrows.
You looked away in awkwardness, clearly not wanting to discuss that subject. You and Abi had been friends since middle school, so she knew your cues. And Abigail immediately understood that she had touched upon a sore subject.
“No, it’s fine… It just… didn’t work out…” you muttered.
“Hey, it’s okay…” Abi comforted you, coming forward to grab your left hand on the bed, but you pulled away, so she retracted, leaning back against the headboard.
You finally looked over to your bff after a moment in sadness and embarrassment.
“Sorry…”
“Don’t be. You’re my best friend. When you’re ready to talk about it, I know you will…” She reassured you.
You gulped and then nodded. Abigail then met your gaze with a mischievous smirk, before proceeding to throw a pillow at you. The fluffy square hit you right in the face, making you yelp and look at your bff in mock shock.
“Hey!!” You exclaimed, then throwing it back, but missing terribly.
Abigail was laughing, and soon you were as well. Her laugh was always so infectious. Your best friend always knew how to make you feel better. After you had both caught your breath, you spoke,
“So, how’s college for you?” You asked.
While you she chosen to stay in Phili for college, Abigail had gone to Chicago. It was the ultimate betrayal against her mother, and you knew that Abigail needed an out. You always looked forward to holidays and breaks, because that meant that you would get to see your best friend again.
“Don’t tell my mom… but it’s so freakin’ nice…” Abigail sighed with a little giggle, leaning in close so that only you would catch her confession, “And… I met a guy…”
Your eyes widened and you smiled wide. Your eyes lit up, you were truly excited for your best friend. You smacked your best friend’s foot playfully.
“Alright!! Let’s go, Abi!!!” You exclaimed in a low whisper.
Abigail went a little red and giggled even more. She was about to delve into more detail about this new mystery man, before Melissa came into the doorway of Abigail’s room.
“Abigail, Momma needs some mozz and a couple other things for her lasagna tonight… Run to the Italian bistro that Uncle Joe runs and pick some up fresh for me?” Melissa spoke leaning against the doorframe, asking it like a question, when it really was an order.
You resisted the urge to roll your eyes. Abigail couldn’t say no to her mother, especially in person. Abigail immediately agreed, and Melissa was quick to flash a fake smile and hand her daughter a list of a dozen things that would take Abi at least and an hour and a half to acquire.
“I’ll go with…” you mumbled, as Abigail got ready to leave.
Standing up and grabbing your coat from the nearby chair, you went to walk past Melissa and follow Abigail, but Melissa grabbed your arm, halting you in place.
“Stay.” She purred, flashing another one of those sickening smiles.
Your stomache flipped upside down, and your eyes widened. Abigail was at the other end of the hall, towards the living room, grabbing her keys and turning back towards you.
“You coming?” Your best friend asked.
You gulped, looking from your bff to Melissa, then back to Abigail.
“I… Actually I think I’ll stay… Help M-Melissa with all the cooking…” you stammered.
Abigail looked at your quizzically, but Melissa was swift to turn on her heels, now facing her daughter.
“No worries right, you can handle it alone, can’t you Abigail…?” Melissa cooed, batting her eyelashes at her impressionable daughter.
Abigail stammered a yes before promptly leaving out the front door. You gulped and just stood there, a little awkward. Melissa after a second then turned back to you.
“Why don’t you help me in the kitchen, hmmm babe…?” Melissa cooed sweetly.
Shivers went through your spine and the lump in your throat became apparent at the pet name, and you just stared at the woman, frozen in the moment. Then linking her arm in yours, Melissa guided you to kitchen before you could even respond.
She let you go at the kitchen island, leaving you there as her hips swayed to the liquor cabinet. She reached up and opened the cabinet, then twisted her gaze to you, a certain glimmer in her eye.
“You drink, ‘Hun…?” Melissa coyly asked, “I assume you do by the way my liquor cabinet was always raided, and Abi is such a good girl, she would never drink unless influenced by someone like you…”
Your mouth stood open as you stood frozen once more at the kitchen island counter. Melissa chuckled, pulling you back into reality and registering the dig that your best friend’s mom had just made to you. You gritted your teeth and stared daggers into the woman as her back was turned to as while she got two classes and some red wine.
She came to the other side of the counter, popping the wine cork and beginning to pour two glasses. Your heart was racing and you were fidgeting with the hem of your shirt.
“I only drink on occasion…” you grumbled, answering Melissa’s question, “And you’d be surprised at what Abi does…”
Melissa flashed you a wicked smile and cocked her eyebrow, handing you the glass filled with the alcohol. You immediately took a sip or three to try and calm your nerves.
“Oh is that so…?” She hummed, coming around the island, wine glass in hand, and linking her free arm in yours once more,
“Why don’t you tell me all about that, and maybe I won’t bust you for being a minor consuming alcohol…” Melissa teased, as she guided you into the living room.
“S-she’s my best friend… I’m no snitch…” you breathed out, your heart pounding in your ears.
Melissa chuckled and guided you to the two person love seat in the living room, sitting down next to you, and taking a sip of her own wine. You followed suit, sipping more of the red, liquid courage. It tasted sweet and expensive.
“Touché… I knew there was something about you…” she purred.
Melissa held her glass with her left hand and placed her right on your left, exposed thigh. Your eyes widened and you looked at her hand. Sparks of electricity rushed through your entire body, all ending up in the same place, your throbbing core. You gulped, turning you attention to your glass and taking some more sips of alcohol.
“Back there I heard something about a certain redhead… Why don’t you tell me about that…?” Melissa hummed, that wicked smirk back on her face, with a tilt to her head.
Her fingers started to caress your thigh, and you weren’t sure whether you deeply regretted or thanked god that you had decided to wear a skirt today.
“I… I was seeing her… but… she cheated on me…” you stammered, looking at your wine glass as your swirled the red liquid in the glass.
“Poor Cucciolina…” Melissa purred, with an edge to her tone,
Her fingers worked their way further up your thigh, you felt your pussy clench around nothing. You felt the woman’s lips graze against your ear, making your breath hitch.
“I would never do that to you…” Melissa purred in the shell of your ear.
Your stomache was bursting with feelings, twists and butterflies and knots and rocks. Your lips parted as you let out an obviously desperate whimper. Melissa chuckled darkly in your ear. Then you felt her warm mouth on your neck. Your neck immediately craned back for her access, and you let out breathy groan as she sank her teeth into your skin.
At this point you knew you regretted nothing, the pleasure and intensity was all worth it. You knew it was probably wrong, that this was your best friend’s mom. And this woman drove you crazy… you hated how she treated your best friend. She was certainly never mom of the year.
But as her mouth wandered down your neck, you knew you needed more. Sucking, and licking, and biting, and marking all along your exposed, goose bumped skin, all logic and ideas of right and wrong were thrown out the window.
Melissa, it seemed, had already placed her glass aside on the side table, and as she sucked a bruise along your neck line, her hands followed your arms and proceeded to take the glass away from you. She pulled away momentarily, making you whimper and and try to lean into her touch, but Melissa was quick to put you back in your place.
“You take what you are given… Understand…?” Melissa purred warily, the hand on your thigh tightening and threatening to leave a mark.
You sucked in a breath, straightening your back as you swiftly nodded. The woman then eased her grip to your thigh and brought your glass up to your lips, pressing and tilting it into your mouth.
“Good. Now drink up…” She breathed out, smirking as you immediately complied.
You gulped the rest of the sweet yet tangy liquid down. Melissa then set the glass aside. As some of the excess wine dribbled down your chin and neck, Melissa leaned forward, her tongue expertly licking up all the dribbled wine from your exposed skin. Your pupils darkened and blew out at the sight, your heart faltering at how hot your best friend’s mom looked while licking up the red liquid from your skin. You shivered once more at the thought of how good her tongue would feel in other places…
Melissa read your reaction like a children’s picture book. She drank in your blown out pupils, erratic breathing, goosebumps, and much more to come… Her fingers now dipped into your inner thighs, her access stunted by your closed legs. They stopped moving, teasing, and it made you want to scream. Scream at the woman to keep going. Scream at her that she was insane. Scream that this was wrong. Scream and beg her to not stop. Scream out in many expletives how much her teasing was driving you crazy. But all that came out was a pathetic whimper.
“Awwwww… Are you conflicted, ‘hun…?” Melissa mockingly cooed, her voice dripping with taunts and lust, “Can’t decided whether you want me to hate you or fuck you…?” Her voice purred darkly and lustfully.
Jolts of pleasure and electricity erupted through your core at the woman’s tone, brashness, pet name, and use of an expletive. You bit your lip as you let out a breathy gasp. The combination of the alcohol and her teasing was making you dizzy.
You wanted… you didn’t know what… actually you did. But it was too difficult to admit it to yourself. For years, you had stuffed all your feelings down, you had reverted to others to fulfill your desires. All because it was too hard to accept your desires for your best friend’s mom.
Your desires for the redheaded woman. The desire to have an older, more experienced partner. Your want to be dominated and controlled by the woman that drove you crazy. Your want to throw logic and your best friend aside and kiss her. The woman who was overbearing and controlling to your best friend. The woman who you’d imagined late at night many times when your fingers worked skillfully in between your legs.
As if Melissa knew the exact thoughts racing through your mind, she interrupted,
“You know what I think…?” Melissa cooed wickedly, pushing your legs open slowly just enough to fit her hand in between your plush thighs,
You watched her fingers attentively, as your heart pounded in your head and beads of sweat ran down your face. Melissa proceeded to lick the bead of sweat off of your face and neck.
“I think that you try so desperately hard to hate me… I think you don’t like me because of Abigail… You think I’m a bad mother.” Melissa purred, as her fingers circled patterns deeper into your inner thigh going under your skirt,
Her other hand had put the empty wine glass aside, and was now tugging at your flimsy shirt. She tugged the sleeves down with ease, and cupped your bare breasts. Your eyes fluttered shut as you let out a breathy whimper, internally praising whatever higher power that you had decided to go braless that day.
“I think you project all of this for Abigail and for your own sanity… Because it’s easier to accept than the truth… The truth that keeps you up at night. I keep you up at night…” the older woman continued to lustfully cooe,
But your eyes shot open, your hips jolted forward, and you let out a pathetic mewl, as two of her digits finally ran up and down your clothed core, while simultaneously taking your left nipple in her mouth and twisting your bus with her teeth.
“AhhHhHhh—” you choked out in a mewl, desperate and quickly meeting Melissa’s gaze as she drank you in with a wicked smirk.
If she didn’t have you attention before, she definitely had it now…
“And the truth while you can’t stand the fact of it… is that you can’t help how your body reacts to me… craves me… needs me…” Melissa darkly chuckled, her tone low and seductive by the end.
Your head was swimming and you don’t even remember when it started, but your hips were grinding against the ghost of the woman’s fingers. You let out a shuttering breath, whimpering and moaning as the redhead’s mouth started to mark up and tease your breasts. Her dark, lust glistening eyes met your desperate gaze.
“Say it, Cucciolina… Tell me I’m right. You know I am…” Melissa breathed out, while switching from one tit to the other.
“You—You’re right…” you stammered, panting, completely out of breath.
Melissa seemed to like that, because you quickly felt her two digits back on your core, sneaking around your panties, to find your semi-wet pussy.
“Mmmmm… you aren’t dripping… I’ll fix that.” She lustfully purred, growling the last part in her seductive, low tone.
Her fingers swiftly plunging into your core, your body immediately spasmed, her walls fluttering and clenching around her digits. Your hips stuttered to keep pace with her delicious assault against your cunt.
“Holy Fuck… Mommy!!…” you shrieked, your whole body exploding with pleasure as her fingers curled deep inside you over and over again.
Your eyes widened and your face went beet red at your words. Your hands were gripping the couch tight, so tight your knuckles were white. But that wasn’t your current concern…
“Oh my, I’m so s-sorry, it it just… slipped out…?” You stuttered, not able to meet the woman’s gaze in embarrassment.
But Melissa only smirked even more. Her thrusts and curls of her digits inside your pussy only intensified, fucking you faster and deeper. You groaned, really loud, as her fingers filled, stretched, and scissored your pussy.
“No apologies… you look real pretty, accepting who you really are…” Melissa cooed wickedly, “Look at me.”
Your eyes went wide and you turned your head back to the older woman. Her tongue was swirling around your right bud, and it made you cry out in pleasure once more. This only spurred the redhead on even more.
“Say my name, baby…” she commanded wickedly.
The squelching of her fingers knuckle deep in your pussy, combined with your sinful noises made the room reek of sex and lust. When you didn’t respond, a third digit slipped inside you, the older woman’s pace never faltering one bit.
“Oh Shit MOMMY!!!” You shrieked, her fingers stretching you out even further and your hands only tightening their grip on her couch.
Melissa hummed in delight, her other hand now replacing her mouth at your tits, while her mouth went to assault your pressure point. Your hips jerked up to grind against her hand, desperately seeking friction against your clit. Babbles and string of whimpers erupted from your throat, your mind now fully gone.
“So needy…” the older woman chuckled, continuing all her administrations with lust and intention, “You can call me Mommy if you want too…”
Her words sparked even more intense pleasure throughout your entire body, and you felt your hands start to wander, but your resisted the urge, part of you not being able to understand how this could have switched on such a dime. Part of you still hated her. So your hands stayed off of the woman. But your hips and the rest of your figure told a whole different story… and your moans and whimpers was all the confirmation that Melissa needed.
“Such a slutty girl for mommy, aren’t ya’…?” Melissa cooed lustfully.
The older woman pumped her digits into you with skill, precision, and speed. She watched you with intent gaze, seeing exactly what curl and thrust pattern made you moan and jolt and scream. Melissa was a quick learner, and the closer she pushed you to the edge, the better she learned the pleasures of your body.
“Oh baby… Are you gonna cum…? Need to cum for mommy so bad…?” Melissa taunted you with a dark chuckle.
Your eyes were screwed tight shut as you nodded vigorously. Your mouth fell open in a silent scream as your orgasm crashed over you. Your hips stuttered in their rhythm of grinding into the redheads hand, but Melissa kept up her pace of fucking you through your climax. Even after you came down, the older woman didn’t stop. You squirmed in oversensitive pleasure as she didn’t relent.
“M-mommyyy please…!!” You whimpered, thrashing against her in the amount of intense pleasure you felt as she drove you to your next impending climax.
“Poor little slut… Can’t get enough of mommy…??” Melissa jeered lustfully.
Your hips stuttered as they rutted against her hand. The sounds of your pussy squelching rang in your head, pushing you only further to the edge. You felt like you were being suffocated, but in a deliciously dizzy way. Your mouth was open, your tongue out as you gasped for breaths in between each precise thrust of her digits.
Right as you were approaching your second orgasm however, Melissa pulled out of you. Your eyes flew wide open and your jaw dropped, followed by a desperate whimper. The older woman’s eyes sparkled and she had a wicked grin plastered on her face.
“Hush, baby.” Melissa purred, grabbing you and pulling you into her lap.
You gasped as you felt something in between her legs. You immediately began grinding down on her bulge, your breaths turning ragged and your hands on her shoulders for support.
“Mommy wants your next high to by on my cock…” Melissa hummed with a dark edge to her tone.
You looked up from your administrations and gulped. You nodded vigorously.
“Please” you whispered, “need it… need it so bad mommy…” while grinding roughly against the woman’s lap.
Melissa chuckled and had you undress all the way as well as helping her, so that in a couple minutes, you were back in her lap, naked and ready for mommy’s cock. Your hands came to the woman’s tits and chest, playing with her as she lined you up with her plastic dick.
With a low groan, you began to sink down onto the woman, all the way to the hilt of the strap. You let out a sinful whimper, feeling full but still unsatisfied. Melissa’s hands held your hips in a firm grip, and her back arched into your touch. She tantalizingly wiggled her hips below you, making the strap-on move slightly inside you. Another desperate whimper and then groan left your lips.
“What’s to stop mommy from just having you cockwarm my dick…?” Melissa cooed wickedly.
You quickly met the older woman’s merciless gaze, desperation and begging all over your face.
“No no mommy please…!! Need it, need it so bad… mmm give it to me mommy uhhhhhh…!!” You cried out, your grip on the redhead’s shoulder and chest tightening.
In response, Melissa rolled your and her hips together, pushing her dick up and into you in one fluid motion, before pulling it partially out as her hips came back down. Your mouth opened in a silent plea, as your body convulsed in pleasure, the ridges of the toy overstimulating your tight cunt.
“Like that, pretty whore…? What mommy to give you slow, hard thrusts until you’re destroyed…?” Melissa taunted you darkly and full of lustful intent.
Melissa then continued these extremely slow yet brutal thrusts, pumping the toy in and out of your aching pussy. You wanted to cry. You wanted to cum. Every thrust was just not enough stimulation for you to cum, the woman knew exactly what she was doing. You tried to beg, babbles of pleading erupting from your lips already after the second thrust and every one after that, begging her to go faster, to fuck you rough. But Melissa didn’t listen.
“You need to learn that we do things mommy’s way, little slut… If you’re good, I’ll let you cum… eventually…” Melissa reassured you, after the eleventh tortuously slow pump in and out of your cunt.
You’d lost any and all composure. All your babbling was incoherent now, and you had tears streaming down your face. But anytime Melissa asked you if it was too much or if you wanted to stop, you begged her to keep going, pleaded with the woman to not let you off easy. Melissa’s face washed over with pride every time you cried to her that you wanted desperately for her to continue.
“What do you want, baby…? You want mommy to make you cum right…?” Melissa wickedly purred into your ear, while continuing to fuck you dumb at a brutally slow pace.
You nodded lazily, too cock drunk to say anything but slurred words.
“Pleaseeeeeee mmmommmyy…” you whined.
“Cum for mommy, honey, I know you want to… know you need it…” Melissa purred lustfully.
With one finally thrust into your sobbing pussy, the tight coil wrapped around your entire body suddenly snapped. The most intense waves of euphoria you’d ever experienced crashed over you, and you rocked back and forth in Melissa’s lap, as the woman guided you to ride her dick faster as you came.
“That’s it, such a pretty whore for mommy…” the older woman breathed out.
After a few minutes, you’d fallen limp in the woman’s lap, her cock still buried deep inside you. Melissa chuckled at how you put up a whiny fight as she took you off her cock. You didn’t like the sudden emptiness she now left you with, you wanted to feel her all over you again. Wanted to feel full and owned again.
But Melissa stood up, walking into the kitchen to clean her strap-on, and when she eventually called you into the kitchen, she promptly cleaned you up, before going back to her cooking and acting as if nothing had happened.
~~~
Melissa Schemmenti Masterlist
#melissa schemmenti#melissa schemmenti x reader#melissa schemmenti x you#Melissa Schemmenti x reader smut#Melissa Schemmenti smut#enemies to lovers#enemies to lovers trope#best friends mom#best friend mom#abbott elementary#abott elementary#abbot elementary#abbott elementary fanfiction#abbott elementary fic#Abbott elementary smut#abbott elementary x reader#abbott elementary season 3#lisa ann walter#cissyenthusiast010155 answers#degrading k1nk#degredation kink#praise and degredation#praise#praise k!nk#mommy#mommy k!nk#mommy k1nk#sugar mommy#mommy knows best#mommy issues
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Propaganda
Lena Horne (Cabin in the Sky, Stormy Weather)— Incredibly talented biracial actress, singer, dancer, and activist (she did so much work towards integrating audiences). Because of the racism of the era, she rarely got to be the lead actress but filmmakers loved her so much that they would often create stand alone segments within a film to highlight her beautiful singing, knowing that these segments would ultimately be cut from the film by censors in areas that forbid films with Black performers. Also, she's just so wonderful in Cabin in the Sky as a gold-digger villain who is not the least bit subtle about her intentions. I would highly recommend checking out her work.
Jane Fonda (Barbarella, Sunday in New York, Barefoot in the Park)—Feminist icon, LGBTQ+ rights activist since the 70s, Civil Rights and Native American rights advocate, environmentalist… she really is THE woman ever
This is round 4 of the tournament. All other polls in this bracket can be found here. Please reblog with further support of your beloved hot sexy vintage woman.
[additional propaganda submitted under the cut.]
Lena Horne:
Black American powerhouse singer and actor who faced all the usual bullshit that any BIPOC faced in vintage Hollywood and achieved legendary status anyway. Also a Civil Rights movement icon.
She was a gem
She was so beautiful and those dimples are amazing! Truly depressing how badly Hollywood treated her because she was black. I would love to have seen what she really could have been if they didn’t cast her in so many yikes roles. She’s got gorgeous eyes and that body! Her joyful smile makes happiness sexy!
youtube
Civil rights actress, singer, dancer, actress, she's got the whole package
Lena Horne was a wonderful singer and actress who largely starred in black cast musicals. While she had a lot of main stream success, she ultimately lost the lead role in showboat (a role she had played on the stage) to a white actress due to hollywood's prejudices. She was also blacklisted during the HUAC hearings, but she still managed to be hot be hot as fuck and have a career spanning decades, working with more well-known stars like Judy Garland in musicals, and working on stage and releasing albums when her hollywood career began to suffer.
Miss Horne became famous during a period of time when Hollywood had very few meaningful roles for people of color. Although she is more so known as a performer, she starred in two successful all black productions (Cabin in the Sky & Stormy Weather). If that wasn't enough, she also guest starred on the Muppets (Season 1, Episode 11)
Jane Fonda:
" I assume she's already been submitted but I gotta make sure. I think there's an element to movies like Barbarella or her segment of Spirit of the Dead of those having been directed by her husband, who famously made movies about her being hot, and the incredible costume design also helped, but good lord. Look at her"
"She was so pretty, dear lord! She was and still us stunning. She’s great at comedy and drama."
"Shes so hot im so gay for me i will let her hit me with hers car"
"Gorgeous and also still getting arrested at climate protests, which is sexy behavior"
"Watching her in Barefoot in the Park seriously made me, a straight woman, question things"
"PLEASE I LOVE HER SO MUCH"
"Her vibes in these movies are so interesting because she, the daughter of an Old Hollywood star, went on to make both poignant dramatic movies and the some of the silliest things you've ever seen but even in the silly space adventures and sexploitations there's always this undeniable gravitas to her. It's like she's able not to take herself very seriously but at the same time never stops having this grace and elegance and makes it all work together. And she's always been very politically active which is also sexy. Her famous mugshot is from 1970 so right at the cutoff mark but come on"
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Would you be interested in doing a one shot with jealous/possessive Elle Greenaway and Jennifer Jareau fighting over f!reader? They compete over her and eventually f!reader just gets fed up and is like, both is good :)
PUSH AND PULL
Jennifer Jareau x fem!reader x Elle Greenaway
CW: Jealousy, smut, threesome, gay confusion (from about everyone except Elle), face sitting, strap-ons, slight praise & a little bit of fluff.
WC: 3315
~
“Tilt your head up,” JJ instructed, cupping your chin. You closed your eyes as she painted a black stripe of eyeliner across your eyelid. You were sitting on the floor of her living room with makeup sprawled across the entirety of her coffee table after she requested that you let her do your makeup before going out tonight.
The rest of the team would be coming as well, but all of them knew that you and JJ had been more closely connected than the rest of them. Shortly after you transferred to the BAU, JJ became your best friend. The two of you were inseparable. She had invited you over early to hang out at her place before you met everyone else at the restaurant. Tonight held more anticipation than most team gatherings: There would be another guest joining you for dinner, a returning agent.
According to JJ, Elle had been an agent quite a few years ago. She was talented, but cases happened and got to her, ultimately ending in her resignation. JJ had seemed somewhat close to her, even with the short amount of time they had spent together. She thought Elle might’ve gone on to be a lawyer, but she wasn’t positive. They hadn’t spoken in a while. From the team's stories, the woman sounded incredibly fascinating, and you were eager to meet her.
The two of you arrived just on time to find Hotch with Rossi already at a table and Penelope and Emily right behind you. Morgan had offered to pick Elle up from the hotel she was staying at while in town. A waitress appeared with waters just as they walked in. Cheers and greetings rose around the table. Morgan raised his ends dramatically, as if the excitement were directed at him and not the stunning woman to his left.
She was still in a red button-down and blazer. The click of her heeled boots turned the heads of their table in her direction as she entered. Her hair was a rosewood brown, resting in waves on her shoulders. Her deep brown eyes and sharp cheekbones that sloped down to her pursed lips produced an air of intimidation. Her face broke out into a smile, and she circled the table with hugs and greetings. You, Rossi, and Emily were the three unfamiliar to her, but she greeted you warmly. She brushed her hand along her shoulder before choosing the seat directly across from you, sending Morgan to the opposite end.
Crossing her arms, JJ leaned on the table in Elle’s direction. "So, what have you been up to? I told y/n I vaguely remember plans for law school, but we haven’t heard from you in forever.”
Elle nodded, swirling the ice in her drink. "I did! I graduated five years ago and then joined a firm started by another ex-FBI agent. It's been rewarding. I miss you guys, but this is a better fit for me.” Her demeanor was admirably confident as she elaborated on a few of her most memorable cases, including the case that returned her to near Quantico
JJ kept asking the questions, but Elle’s eyes kept darting over to land on you. Eventually, once JJ had finished the typical catch-up small talk, Elle turned her attention to you. "Sorry, I came in a bit of a flurry, and you never got to introduce yourself. I know Emily took my place, so how’d you end up at the BAU?"Her questions were simple, but the way her attention was directly and entirely on you made your face flush for some unknown reason. Her chin was in her palm, leaning her elbow on the table as she hung on to your every word.
"Well, JJ was on a case overseas. I took her place. Eventually she returned when Emily returned, but I ended up sticking around anyway. I guess I made a good enough impression.” You shrugged your shoulders, sharing a brief smile with JJ.
"Nobody wanted to get rid of her,” she teased, leaning in toward the table as she whispered.
Elle laughed softly with the two of you. "I can see why,’ she said smoothly. Your lips parted in soft surprise from the sudden and effortless compliment. Elle’s lips just curled into a quick smirk before she began twisting the silver rings decorating her hands.
JJ noticed your frozen stare and brought her hand down on top of your knee, rubbing it lightly. Morgan and Emily became rowdy as usual, attracting the attention of everyone at the table. Laughter filled the booth in the corner as compliments and jabs were thrown out of mouths all in one statement. Things settled down, only slightly, when the food arrived. A few nonchalant conversations continued, but it was mostly the scrape of forks against plates. Everybody was starving. The drinks kept coming throughout the night, and everybody’s inhibitions fell to the floor. Penelope had dragged an extra chair around to sit by Morgan and Emily. Rossi and Hotch had completely left the table, engaged in a conversation with the band, who were currently taking a break. With empty space in the booth, Elle took the opportunity to slide in next to you.
Both Elle and JJ were leaning forward slightly. "So, Elle, is there anyone new, a boyfriend or girlfriend?”
Elle’s eyes darted to you for the briefest moment. Clasping her hands in her lap, she answered the question pointedly before twisting the conversation back to JJ. "No, nothing at the moment, but if I’m interested in someone, I let them know. I think it’s silly to waste your chance with someone out of fear. And what about you? Did anything ever come from that thing with-” she froze, trying to retrieve his name. "Oh, Will!”
JJ’s cheek hollowed in with distaste from old memories, and having to admit that things hadn’t worked out. "No, that ended a while ago; it just wasn’t a good match."
The fuse of a growing tension had been lit, but you had yet to notice the tight lips and slight eyerolls exchanged between them. You hadn’t been looking for tension from them in the first place; JJ had mentioned she loved Elle when she was at the BAU and had missed her.
Elle frequently sought you out through the night, constantly starting conversations. "Oh, hang on, your necklace is twisted.” She leaned toward you, her hands brushed against your neck as you adjusted the thin gold chains hanging from your neck. You froze as her hand lingered lightly against your skin, and you could smell hints of her deep cherry perfume from your close proximity.
She only pulled away when JJ’s hand clamped down on your shoulder. "Hey, run to the restroom with me?” You were up and out of your seat with the tug of her hand before you nodded. Leaning on the sink, you frowned, watching JJ become obsessive over every inch of her appearance, something she only did when she was nervous.
"Are you okay? You seem a little on edge tonight."
Her face cracked into a small smile. "Yeah, I’m okay, just feeling a bit off. You notice everything.” Her smile turned into a real one, and she wrapped an arm around your waist, pulling you in for a quick kiss on the cheek. "Thank you for checking in on me.”
Elle slid back against the seat so you could slide back into the booth when you returned to the table. As you squeeze by with your hands braced on the table, you feel Elle’s hands drift up to your lower back, sending a flurry of butterflies up in your stomach. Her hands fell back into her lap as you sat down, but you caught a small smirk on her face.
Eventually the waiter started to linger around the table. You got the hint and started passing around the bills. The team walked out in a huddle, shielded from the cold, dropping everyone off at the cars. Once you reached Emily’s car, you were left alone with JJ and Elle. Morgan and Penelope had gotten distracted, lingering in the entryway. "Here, we can take you home,” you suggested without hesitation. Pulling open the door, you stepped back, allowing Elle to climb into the back seat.
"Thanks, love,” she said, squeezing your arm that she was still clinging to.
JJ became excessively touchy for the rest of the car ride. Her hand rested on your thigh permanently, and you slowly rubbed her hand up and down your leg at every stoplight. Elle seemed perfectly content in the back, focused on her text messages, while JJ started talking about what the two of you might do this weekend or breezily joining a conversation when she found a smooth opening. The fact that she wasn’t as quick to fall into JJ’s jealous state was irritating your best friend. She knew you could be quickly defensive at times, even when it was silly, but her head just wouldn't let it go when it came to you. She had always held your dating partners to higher standards than her other friends, even though very few of them ever became serious. Contrary to when she first joined the BAU as the teams communications liaison, she enjoyed time spent with you individually much more than team gatherings.
As you approached the hotel, Elle leaned forward by your shoulder, guiding you toward the parking lot of the building she was staying in. While gathering up her stuff, she stopped with her hand on the handle. "Do you guys want to come in for a moment? The best I can offer you is coffee and vending machine snacks, but I’d like to get to know you more in a quiet setting.”
“Sure!”
“ Actual-” JJ stopped when she heard the excitement in your voice and decided to remain quiet with difficulty. She took a deep breath, got out, and jogged to catch up to you and Elle, who was waiting with the door held open.
The elevator ride up was awkward to say the least. Nobody talked or barely breathed, which actually made it twice as unbearable. You were stuck between wanting to spend time with your best friend and comforting newcomers and also feeling stuck between the tension that had followed the three of you around all night but not being able to figure out its cause.
"The coffee station is down the hall if anybody wants some." Elle trailed off as she dug through her purse for the hotel’s key card.
"I can go grab three,”you offered.
"Thank you so much; it’s three rooms down on the right."
You shuffled down the mall to pour up cups for the three of you while Elle let JJ inside. Quickly pressing on three lids, you cautiously headed back down the hall. Elle’s door was still cracked open a bit, and you could hear their voices from inside.
You were ready to walk right in, but something about their tone stopped you. The jealousy and tight-lipped questions from the rest of the night seemed to have disappeared, and they were talking softly like old friends again.
"How long have you known?"
You recognized Elle’s voice as the slightly lower one and felt bad for eavesdropping, but your curiosity got the better of you. Known what? JJ told you everything, or at least that’s what you assumed.
You heard JJ sigh, and she took a moment to reply. You imagined her resting her head against her hand, like she did whenever she anxiously planned out her answer. "I honestly didn’t know until tonight. I thought I just liked her as a friend, but when the possibility of her being with someone else came up, I realized that I wanted her.”
You heard Elle release a heavy breath. Her voice became quieter, as if she had moved farther away from the door. "You have to tell her, Jay. You’ve been the closest of friends for, like, 8 years now?”
“I hate those kinds of conversations. They’re also so awkward, and I’m not good at expressing my feelings. And how would I even know if we have the attraction and chemistry aspect, not just a romantic connection?
Elle chuckled. "Sex, JJ, that would be the answer.
"Ugh, but sex with someone who I called a friend all of ten minutes before has always been awkward. It always seems restrained or calculated. I would just want to see if we could... Have fun, you know? I can’t believe I’m telling you all of this. You still have that effect on people.
"What, the one that makes people want to confess to a crush on their best friend and sex life? I think that’s just you babes.” High-pitched laughter from both of them blended together.
"If you want something new and exciting, then initiate something new and exciting. I think it would be a terrible mistake to pass up the possibility of something working out between you. I mean, have you seen her?
There was a long silence and then an exchange of gasps between them that made you think they might be having a conversation with their eyes.
“No, are you serious?”
You began to only be able to hear clips of the conversation. The rest was only in barely audible whispers that you were unable to discern.
"I mean, only if you’re interested. No strings, of course; I’ll be leaving. I do happen to be great at loosening people up, and I’m not saying I wouldn’t enjoy it. I also completely understand if your answer is no, jealousy is complicated."
Someone began approaching you from the other end of the hotel hallway, and you didn’t want to be caught seemingly eavesdropping on a hotel guest's conversation. Slipping inside, you shut the door behind you loud enough to announce your return.
"Hey darling, you can just set them on the counter over there.” Elle called out from her spot, sprawled out on the corner of her couch. JJ sat on the other end. Neither of their faces hid the effects of their conversation well, but while Elle’s was a deepening sense of confidence, JJ’s was a spreading blush and eyes darting back and forth. "Was the machine slow again? You took a minute."
You shifted your weight back and forth on the heels of your feet as you debated telling them you had overheard. Your eyes darted to the hotel door that had been propped open, possibly purposefully. Maybe you were reading into it, but you had seen the caution and paranoia that takes over FBI agents even in their personal lives. Elle should be no exception, and wouldn’t live hotel doors in the center of the city propped open. “ I um overheard snippets of your conversation and it sounded serious, so I decided I’d wait outside until you were finished.
Elle smiled softly, glancing at JJ to watch her expression just as you were. She went through every emotion in about twenty seconds. Her face grew pale with the natural instinct of being overheard, but then she almost looked more relieved. Possibly one less awkward conversation out of the way, she didn’t have to hide it like a secret from you any longer, and the ball was now in your court.
"We've been friends for years JJ. I think you already know what my response will be. I’m open to it, all of it.” The words rolled off your tongue as you tilted your head, and both women straightened up with attention.
"God,” Elle chuckled under her breath, sipping at the drink you handed her.
You smirked, tilting your head toward the bedroom a few steps away, and reveled at the way JJ’s eyes darkened with desire. Both women were silently up and behind you with soft footsteps as you climbed on the bed. They stood on the edge while you kneeled into the mattress.
Elle pulled off JJ's jacket, letting it fall to the floor. Goosebumps rose along the back of the blonde’s neck. You reached forward and tugged her closer to you by her belt, causing her breath to hiccup. You undid her belt painfully slowly while she tangled her hands in your hair. Elle was slightly turned away, undressing in front of the nightstand. Your heartbeat fluttered at the sight of a harness hanging from her hips. JJ tugged on your hair, sending sparks through your scalp. "Let me eat you out baby,” you begged, dragging your nails down her thighs with a cheshire grin.
“Sit on her face,” Elle challenged as she orchestrated your positions all while climbing up in between your legs.
JJ seemed hesitant to have her weight balanced above your mouth and gripped the headboard harshly. With gentle reassurance, you guide her downwards until she gasped at the contact of your lips brushing against her cunt. Elle spurred you on, dragging her red faux cock along your slick folds. Your hands grabbed at JJ’s ass, enjoying the soft pants that fell from her lips as your tongue explored her. Flicking her clit sent quivers through her thighs, and she moved her hands down to your chest, kneading your breasts.
It didn’t take you long to realize Elle was reacting along with you. Every time your lips closed around JJ’s clit, stimulating the sensitive bundle of nerves, Elle thrust into you with a bruising grip on your hips. Each of your movements drew JJ and consequently, yourself closer to an orgasm.
Elle’s pace suddenly quickened, causing you to moan. JJ cried out from the vibrations, digging red crescents into your skin. "Fuck,” she panted. "You're doing so good baby,” she praised, wiping the mix of juices from the corner of your mouth. Bringing her fingers to her mouth, she hollowed out her cheeks as she sucked them clean. Returning your mouth to her cunt with fresh motivation, you ran your tongue along her slit, and her thighs clenched over your ears. All sound became muted by the sound of blood rushing in your head and JJ’s murmuring off soft praises as she ran her fingers over all of your body that she could reach.
You felt your legs stretch as Elle rested your heels on her shoulders. The new angle allowed her to pound in with you at a breathtaking new angle. Just as the rough movement of her hips rocking against yours was about to transform into pain, a smooth, ecstatic feeling left your lungs traveling through your limbs with a hazy sensation.
JJ elicited a combination of moans and satisfied whimpers as her body tensed and her cum coated your lips with a trembling orgasm. Her toned thighs relaxed from alongside your head and she ran her thumbs down your flushed cheeks. When she leaned backwards, Elle supported her easily, rubbing her hands up and down JJ’s legs from behind her.
Untangling yourselves, the three of you collapsed into the sheets with heartbeats pounding out of your chests and the quick rise and fall of your lungs. After a moment, JJ rolled over, tucking her arm around your waist. Lifting her head, she peered over your head to Elle, who was smiling at JJ’s soft act of affection from across the bed.
Your eyes were fluttering in and out, not focused enough to read their lips as they mouthed back and forth to each other. Elle, on the other hand, smirked at JJ’s exaggerated mouth shapes to convey an "Oh my god.”
Elle tipped her head with her everlasting confidence, responding with a silent, "You're welcome, that was…” She was unable to string her words together for the first time all night. JJ grinned adoringly as she rested her head on the pillow beside yours, curling her chin into your neck. Your eyelids finally sank completely closed upon the touch of her warm embrace.
#jennifer jareau x reader#wlw smut#elle greenaway#elle greenaway x reader#jennifer jareau#criminal minds
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Ultimate Incest Tournament - Round 1
Propaganda under the cut:
Cersei/Jaime:
they're literally womb-to-tomb lovers. they feel that the rest of the world is beneath them and they're the only ones that matter. the fact that they're twins is fundamental to their attraction to each other
they’re blonde they’re evil they crossdress they’re fucked-up mirrors of one another they serve cunt they’re both bisexual probably and they’re TWINS who FUCK. who said that.
"if I were a woman, I'd be Cersei."
"I'll kill [...] the whole bloody lot of them until you and I are the only people left in this world."
"I am sick of being careful. The Targaryens wed brother to sister, why shouldn't we do the same? Marry me, Cersei. Stand up before the realm and say it's me you want."
"'Do you have a little wife, ser?'" No, I have a sister."
Bruce/Dick:
Adopted son Dick Grayson boywife Dick Grayson boywife
Was YOUR pairing mentioned in a 397 page callout post that changed the entire comic book industry forever? I thought so.
before John/Dean entered the scene they were doing up the militant-freudian-father/child-soldier-motherofhisotherchildren-son incestuationship in 1940!! in fact they were so flagrantly intimate that they spawned the first ever 'video games are bad for children' discourse in the form of 'comics are bad because they'll make your children yearn for the gay incest mines' i.e. seduction of the innocent by fredric wertham. and y'know maybe they were right after all *gestures to the incest poll tournament*
SO many delicious aspects of their dynamic honestly. the fact that dick made batman a father and the latter loved it (and him) so much that he sought to replace him forever and ever again and again rebecca daphne du maurier style. word on the streets (lost canon timeline) is bruce made the first replacement— jason todd— dye his hair from red to black so that he'd resemble dick, inspiring generation spanning lust for and yearning of approval from both daddy bats and first son/greatest love of aforementioned daddy bats
How many other incest pairings are so strong that they generated like at least 5 other incestuationships? the family tree branches are CRUMBLING. not to mention their dramatic breakup did give us beloved 2000's animated series teen titans.
there are so many interpretations writers like to impose on the characters. they're father/son, frankenstein and creature, brothers, husband and wife. when batman has his own biological son but then promptly "dies", dick, the first son, comes in as a father to his father's first son (whilst donning the cape and cowl/body of his partnerfather). MANY say that dick was a better parent to damian wayne than even bruce. it literally can't get more incestuous than this, sorry
#tumblr polls#tournament polls#incest poll#cersei/jamie#lannicest#game of thrones#a song of ice and fire#bruce/dick#batcest#batman#tw incest#round 1
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She finds out about it a few weeks after her classes start. It happens by chance, and almost seems too good to be true.
But it's not.
The University of Illinois does actually have its own newspaper for gays and lesbians. It exists, made explicitly for them, by them.
And Robin needs it.
It requires some snooping, though it's basically nothing after everything she did at Starcourt. Soon enough, she is $8.50 ($7.50 for a yearly subscription and $0.5 each for the two previous issues) poorer in dollars and infinitely richer in happiness.
People Like Us: News, opinions, and features for the C-U gay and lesbian community it says on the front page. Issues 2 and 3 are both 8 pages long while the first issue is slightly shorter. They have everything. News about marches in Chicago and local gay-friendly businesses. Opinion pieces on places to meet up and homophobia. Roommate ads, reviews, and personal stories. News about AIDS. And, in the very back, a blurb proclaiming LESBIAN CONTRIBUTORS WANTED.
Maybe that'll be her one day. She's no Nancy, but she can write. For now, though, she's content with reading. It's almost overwhelming to hold the papers, knowing that it's made by people like her. That someone like her might be reading the same words at the same time. Less lonely, in a way.
No one else on campus knows about her. Ellen, her dorm mate, seems fine so far, but Robin won't take her chances just yet. She struck gold with Steve, Eddie, and the kids, but someday her luck will run out. So she hides the issues in a hard folder under her mattress whenever she isn't reading.
Then she gets the October issue in her hand and nearly dies of excitement. On the front page, the news section is announcing that "two highly acclaimed gay/lesbian films are set to appear on campus this month". The groundbreaking Desert Hearts and Parting Glances will be screened four times each, one week apart from each other, at the end of the month.
At her first opportunity, she calls and tells Steve about it.
"You have to come and see them with me!" she says. "I can't go alone!"
So he does, and he barely complains about the 3-hour drive.
On Sunday, October 19, he shows up at 7 in front of her building. They catch up while having a bite to eat before the film. It's mostly her talking, blabbing about classes and professors and new people and Illinois and the college experience while he chews his half of the pizza, staring at her with big eyes that scream I missed you, I missed you, I missed you!
She takes every chance she gets to knock their feet together under the table and clutches his arm on their way to the film. Just in case her own eyes don't scream it back loud enough.
By the time Desert Hearts starts, she's giddy. She knows only what the newspaper told her: that it's about a soon-to-be-divorced college professor meeting a lesbian country girl in Reno in the 50s, and that it includes a 'climactic lovemaking scene'. Both facts have her squirming with excitement, her seat squeaking beneath her.
The lights go out and the movie starts. It's slow-paced and atmospheric, using the Nevada scenery to its advantage. Parts of it are actually really slow, but she doesn't mind, especially not as it builds and builds toward Vivian ultimately accepting her attraction to Cay.
Steve is with her from beginning to end, scoffing at the antagonistic stepmother, squeezing her hand when the lovers are separated, and squeezing some more when they're reunited. When they reach the intimate scene, he gasps loudly. Then both of them succumb to a giggle fit and must stifle themselves lest they be thrown out. The newspaper was right – it is pretty hot stuff.
There's no dramatic declaration of love at the end, no the ending is as slow and quiet as the rest of it. Still, it hits hard. A sledgehammer to the chest, shattering her ribs and smearing her heart all over. Because these women look each other in the eyes and say 'I love you'. They say 'I want you'. They say 'she just reached in and put a string of lights around my heart', and they say it like it's normal. Which, Robin knows it is. But her world is small and their world is the silver screen and they say it like it's normal.
Steve turns to her when the credits roll and the lights come back on, saying it was good. But when she looks at him, his face falls. Arms wrapping around her, he pulls her into his lap and guides her face into the crook of his neck. Fingers cramping where they clutch his shirt, she buries herself deep and cries, cries, cries. She thinks she hears someone ask if she's okay, but Steve shoos them off, so it doesn't matter.
He walks her home in comfortable silence. As they stop outside her building he tucks her hair behind her ear and offers to stay with her. But she tells him no – he has work in the morning, so she'll have to make do without him.
The responsible thing to do after waving him off is go to bed, wake up early for class. Instead, she steers her step to the nearest payphone and punches in a California number. Minutes later she's got Vickie on the line, wondering if she's okay and if she's been crying. Robin reassures her, then recounts the evening. Soon Vickie's bell of a laughter envelops her; they discuss who's the Cay to whose Vivian until Robin runs out of coins.
Next week, Steve is back and they do it all over again, except this time they eat burgers. They even snatch the same seats they had the previous screening.
Parting Glances follows a gay couple for 24 hours of their daily life. Because they're established, their intimate scene happens much earlier. Steve's muttering about how unfair it is that it's less explicit than the lesbian scene has pride burn in her chest, even as she shushes him.
All in all, it's a really good film. It doesn't hit her as hard since it's about gay men and no lesbians, but it still hits. Again, because it's presented as something normal. They're people in love, and they have jobs and problems and dreams and friends. The hardest hit of them all is Nick, who has AIDS but not in a pitiful way. He's a rockstar with a sense of humor, still cool and charismatic. Sexy, even, thanks to the oozing confidence and the intensity of his gaze.
Steve is quietly contemplative on the way out. She slips her hand into his and lets him think. It's first when they're halfway home that she breaks the silence. Spinning so she's walking backward in front of him, him holding her waist to steer her away from lampposts and curbs, she asks:
"Did you like it?"
"I did. But it left me a little sad." He shrugs. "I just hope Nick survives and gets back together with Michael."
She chews the inside of her cheek. "I don't know if… I mean, AIDS is-"
"I know, Robbie, I'm keeping myself up to date. Or I try. It's just… It's very…" Steve sighs, shaking his head. "You know."
And she does know. The fear of being targeted and the frustration of being helpless. The fury of knowing diseases are supposed to be cured, until the ones affected are people who aren't supposed to exist in the first place.
Steve says, "I think he'll be okay. Nick."
"Yeah," she says, a little choked up.
"And he and Michael will be happy."
"Yes."
"And Cay will stay on the train, or Vivian will return to Nevada, and they'll be together. For real."
"They will. And even if they don't," she reaches up to cup his cheeks, caressing his stubbled jawline, "they'll have someone else. Someone just as good. Or better."
His gaze on her is heavy and bright, boring through, seeing inside. He nods.
"Or better," he says.
With that, he grabs and swings her around (in a pretty impressive move, not that she'll admit it to him) until she's latched onto his back. Then he carries her home.
It's maybe 50 degrees out, so not freezing but enough to leave you shivering if your jacket is old and getting threadbare, like Robin's. She's not cold, though, because Steve always runs hot. His back is firm and his grip on her thighs is secure; she burrows into him, absorbing his warmth and familiar scent. Lulled, not to sleep per se, but to rest by his even strides, she dreams of all the beautiful things she wants to have, and even more vividly of the things she wants to keep.
------------------------------
People Like Us was a real newspaper. You can find the issues that helped inspire this fic here.
(Oh, and you should really watch both those films if you haven't already.)
#stranger things#stranger things fanfiction#stobin#platonic stobin#robin buckley#steve harrington#just taking a short break from november paramedic to finish this#my writing
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Who *Should* Have Died From The Konoha ~12 Instead Of The One Who Did
rules:
we’re assuming they die under the same circumstances as the other guy
each one listed would have a complete storyline and their death would further the immediate plot as well as the overall narrative
i’m not “just picking characters i don’t like”
i do not condone killing characters for the sake of shock value but am considering shock as a legitimate tool in generating impact of a character’s death
miss me with “[redacted]’s death was a tragic result of the shinobi system” because no it was not. if that were true you could sub out [redacted] for any other child soldier and get the exact same impact. we know exactly why they were chosen and it’s got an (insufficient) explanation irl and in-universe.
#3. Sai
Motivation: Friendship
First of all, imagine the shock value from killing one of THE Team Kakashi members.
Cool. Now imagine Naruto’s shock at Sai sacrificing himself for him.
Sai overanalyzes normal human interaction to the point of not understanding it. He reads books about how to befriend people. He still doesn’t understand it all the time but friendship is coming more naturally to him these days. What he does understand is that Naruto is the only chance of winning this war, and he’s down, and the enemy is aiming for him, and Hinata is trying to stop them but she’s on the ground, the spears are in the air and so is Sai, and Naruto is his friend.
He doesn’t need to think about it much deeper than that.
Now imagine Sasuke “What Does ‘Friend’ Mean To You” Uchiha witnessing this, witnessing Naruto’s reaction, and the further effects this may have on his character. After all, Sai was his replacement. If Naruto feels this strongly about losing someone who was decidedly not him but his friend and teammate nevertheless then… maybe.
#2. Rock Lee
Motivation: Youth
Regardless of *how* this one plays out, no one wants to watch the determined, precious, comedic relief die; no one who’s watched this far into the show wants Rock Lee specifically to die. Huge impact already. But we can make it super duper sad because he deserves a memorable death. I see it going one of two ways.
One: Hinata doesn’t even have the time to try to shield Naruto because Rock Lee is faster. Ten-Tails barely launches the attack and Lee’s already taken/attempted to counter the hit. Perhaps this is his eight gates moment. Similar to Sai, Rock Lee would cite the power of friendship in his dramatic death speech, but he also was just… doing his duty. Truly, if you’re in the “Neji was just another tragic child soldier” camp, Rock Lee is the prime example of what I mean when I say you could sub in any child soldier, which I know sounds paradoxical but stay with me. Rock Lee’s entire personality is training harder than anyone else to benefit a system that will ultimately result in his death. If you want to make a point about child soldiers and needless lives lost, Rock Lee is the one to kill.
Two: Rock Lee doesn’t shield Hinata. He shields Neji. But not necessarily on purpose. The scene plays out exactly as written up to the moment Neji activates his byakugan, and the next frame isn’t him falling to the ground, it’s Rock Lee. The usually-somewhat-reserved Neji is devastated, probably in tears, demanding to know why he would do something like this. Rock Lee coughs up a bit of blood. “I was faster than you.” Smile. “I finally beat you…” Serene eyes fall shut. “…rival.”
And now imagine Naruto’s reaction to losing Bushy Brow. Imagine him watching Gai be brought to his knees by a blow that didn’t physically touch him. Imagine Madara incorrectly perceiving that. The implications. The foreshadowing.
#1. Shino
Motivation: Legacy
I’m gonna be real, the writers were never gonna kill off Rock Lee like that, which is the biggest reason Shino has taken the crown as Most Worthy Of A Tragic Death in my book.
This dude has a connection to both Naruto and Hinata (making him equally as good a sacrifice as Neji if that’s the canon criteria). However, unlike most other (male) characters, Shino isn’t shown to have a particularly close friendship with Naruto. The one recurring joke around Shino is that he’s so irrelevant even Naruto can’t remember his name.
But he is good friends with Hinata. And he knows she’ll spend the rest of her life miserable if Naruto dies, and that if she dies right now she will never have gotten her life’s greatest wish.
So Shino goes out in a blaze of glory, and we’ll probably insert something about how Naruto has somehow secretly inspired him all along— or maybe something cynical about how he always wanted to be included by Naruto but never was unless Kiba or Hinata were around, so he’s sacrificed himself to maintain the livelihood of everyone else while not “losing” that friendship himself— and we of course get the touching moment with Hinata (oh just imagine the drama if Shino lay dying and told Hinata “Why did I protect you? It’s simple. The reason is… for the same reason you protected him.” and we find out that the huge secret crush of the show was not Hinata toward anyone, but Shino toward Hinata, never confessing because he knew it would be futile).
Good luck forgetting his name now, Naruto. Now no one will ever forget about Shino Aburame.
#char chats#naruto#naruto spoilers#naruto meta#naruto shippuden#naruto war arc#konoha 12#anti konoha#anti shinobi system#naruto uzumaki#hinata hyuga#shino aburame#sai#rock lee#neji hyuga#sasuke uchiha#pro neji#pro naruhina#naruhina#shinohina
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been sitting on this for awhile because its a bit controversial, but its one of the main reasons i was pushed into the frankenstein fandom space so i figured it was high time to talk about it
ive noticed that theres this general opinion, both among scholars and present in more fandom-y spaces, that victor is somehow effeminate for what are ultimately symptoms of disability (fainting spells, being bedridden, hysteria, etc) as if being physically or mentally ill is something that is inherently feminine. i have read articles published by academics that victor’s sickness is proof of his “femininity,” which is why he wants to take on the traditional part of a woman, that is, childbirth (via creature)
even in general, and not on an academic level, it emerges in jokes or memes all over the place — people poking at victor for being weak, or sick, or a gay little UWU bean sub, because aw hes fainting all the time XD and he’s sooo dramatic! as if these things were somehow both his choice, and somehow innately feminine
so, not only is there this weird link people are attempting to draw between disability and femininity, but also queerness (particularly, ive noticed, being a “bottom” or “sub” — but thats a whole separate can of worms) and femininity. as if being either of these things is inherently girly or cutesy and thus worthy of being made fun of
there comes a point (particularly when these interpretations leak into broader understandings of something via pop culture), where, for lack of a better word, it comes off as fetishizing or romanticizing queerness and/or queer relationships
and while this may seem relatively harmless on the surface and comes off as just thoughtless jokes made in bad taste, it IS serious. not just within the context of frankenstein, but the general premise of the severity that even subconscious reinforcement of detrimental and stereotypical ideas should be treated with. its a slippery slope from jokes to notions that affect you and how you see the world
this is obviously part of a broader problem with the way disability, gender, identity and etc is thought about and taught, which results in people harboring all sorts of these types of underlying prejudices. its just that victor happens to be a particularly good example, wherein he is a feminized man that is ascribed as “weak,” and the attribute “weak” is ascribed to someone who has been historically analyzed as both disabled and queer. this has been reinforced for decades, and i feel like this treatment of his character in this way is so blatantly obvious and runs rampant while it goes nearly entirely unchecked — and also in the case of frankenstein discourse, its often a quadruple whammy (ableism, misogyny, transphobia, homophobia)
and the worst part is that it is so often completely unintentional, and the bulk of this sort of content are well-meaning jokes. i genuinely don’t think people do this in bad faith or out of malice, but spreading these concepts even in formats that appear to be harmless (jokes, memes) just contribute to and continue to spread these ideas and stereotypes. its frustrating because its hard to point out and bring attention to without coming off as nitpicky or overly sensitive because this sort of thing is just so SUBTLE, and these beliefs are so gradually learned and then reinforced on a subconscious level
i could go on but for risk of sounding redundant ill digress, however to be clear this is not me saying you cant view victor as transfem, or disabled, or queer (i do!), or to view him as feminine, or etc, but that you should look at the reasons for WHY you think so, and how you or others treat the subject when talking about it.
#rob.txt#frankenstein#frankenstein the modern prometheus#victor frankenstein#gothic lit#if this warrants any tws let me know#analysis#ish
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LET'S SPREAD SOME LOVE!!!!!
talk about your favourite mutuals and why you like them
😄
oh god this is gonna be one hell of an answer
@fairyhaos because shes the sweetest comfiest most adorably chaotic lil ball of energy + she gives the best advice like hello??? what are you??? oh god my heart goes a little off track everytime we talk i just love you so much
@wheeboo okay shes part 2 of the they-make-me-feel-the-safest trio along w yena and axe like please i stumbled across the sweetest sassiest boo stan ever ALSO UR GORGEOUS???
@blue-jisungs axeaxeaxeaxeaxe so chaotically lovely and so boomer and so fun and yoid think shes savage but no shes just soft and as harmful as a pinecone (why do u remind me of tht one joon meme of him just. sitting there. peeling potatoes. in tiny.)
@slytherinshua we kinda talked less for a while bc life happened and then caught up (kinda lol) and im so glad to see shes still as crazy and lovable as ever (im waiting for tht ppt) like talk abt impressive. impressive is her whole personality. sometimes in, uh, less than conventional ways...hehe
@eternalgyu HANNIE WHERE TF R U I MISS UUUUUUUU 😭😭😭😭🫶🏻 like yk what i imagine when i think of hannie? causing mischief. LIKE IDEK WHY OKAY i just feel like we'd be running around giggling like idiots js pulling random pranks on people and js the thought makes me smile
@yllouhannie ylli is like love. ylli is gentle and kind and sweet. shes understanding and passionate and really quite cute. oh my love you make me wanna jump off a cliff because how can someone like you exist 😭 (no srsly what is this witchcraft ilysm mwah)
@woozvc nora is like home. which is saying a lot lmao i sound dramatic but like yk when u just talk to someone and it feels just right even tho ur not rly doing much? shes older but she lets go and i can just feel how absolutely beautiful this person is *melts off a cliff*
@welcometomyoasis shu oh shu i have no words so pardon if this is a little small but. ik i say this a lot but i rly do mean it. i love you. so much. yr msgs and reblogs and asks always make a smile and they make me giddy and suddenly nothing is wrong with the world 🥺
@haecien bro is my ultimate gay bestie like what else do you need in life other than cien. what. nothing is the answer. life is complete when u hv cien and his shenanigans lolol like i dare you try to Not like him. i m p o s s i b l e.
@glosskirt AYYYYY MY ARMY SOULMATE we connected over min yoongi. we still rant over min yoongi. we shall die talking about min yoongi. like there is nothing better than having someone to fangirl with over my favs gloss you filled a hole in my life <3
@mesanthropi weiwei!!!! my little bundle of sugar spice and everything nice!! (+ chaos and a passion about the randomest shit ever how do u live why am i not this exciting) how is it always fun to talk to you and why do ur msgs excite me so much
@aaniag chaos. thats it. chaos. this woman brought with her about half a dozen more desi moots for me like how do i hug you how do i appreciate you enough i ugghhhh 😩
@thepoopdokyeomtouched im still waiting for my flirting yk? lol on a serious note, u and ur crazy streak r probably the most entertaining thing on here, and i fucking love it. i love ur chaos and the fact tht u choose to share it w me, thank you 🫶🏻
@arafilez bro rly dropped outta thin air like a fucking ghost and made my life abt a 100x more exciting where were you my entire life ara. where. why didnt the atz rants and the writing and the random asks show up sooner. why.
@nonononranghaee HAFS MY LIL CUTIE PATOOTIE WHY DO I ALWAYS WANNA SQUISH U NOMNOM U CRUSH U KSKSJEHEH u give me so much cuteness aggression oh my god...
@kkooongie sarah sarah sarah sarah sarah i live for ur writing and im always looking forward to our little chats abt books and random stuff (...when r u updating btw 😅)
@maeleelee @mxnsxngie @imagine-a-life-like-this i don't tell you guys enough how much i love and appreciate each one of you. i dont tell u enough how grateful i am whenever i think abt u bc god ik how hard it is to take in a random person in ur circle, to adjust w a kid, to make said kid feel safe and included and loved. so thank you. for all that you do for me and for loving lil ol' me <3
@cadenonlinelive where u at damn i hvnt seen u in ages
@rubywonu @idubiluv GUYS STOP HIBERNATING ITS NOT WINTER ANYMORE I MISS U
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ok trust me when i say i can’t wait for the dramatic fallout of nandor finding out guillermo’s been turned and i love the drama of the others finding out one by one and i think it’s awesome that guillermo took the power into his own hands and i can’t wait to figure out why guillermo’s transformation is taking so long but also. i do miss the alternate sequence of events in which nandor does turn guillermo as a pinnacle of their relationship and the ultimate virginity/gay sex metaphor is realized
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Dr. Jumba Jookiba & Agent Wendy Pleakley from Lilo & Stitch (2002)
Do Not Separate: Though not together by choice in their source material, the two end up bonding as time goes on and are essentially always depicted as a duo within marketing and extended canon, allowing them to be read as a couple.
Wait, You Were Joking?: Within the film, despite being referred to with masculine pronouns, Pleakley disguises himself in women’s clothing to blend in, which is intended to be comedic. This becomes a running gag in the extended canon.
VS
Emperor Kuzco from The Emperor’s New Groove (2000)
It’s Fanon: Kuzco is notably characterized by his dramatics and flamboyancy, to the degree that he was jokingly considered an honorary Disney Princess by fans.
Lack of Love Interest: In the film, he blatantly turns down potential brides for arbitrary reasons, and ultimately has no love interests outside of extended canon.
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Been writing quite a lot of WH fic in my spare time recently and I realised I've kinda accidentally created a consistent interpretation of how the neighbourhood would see Frank X Eddie (liking each other or being together but on the down-low):
To be clear these aren't my theories on what's going on in the ARG, it's like... just in the world of the WH show itself, without getting deep into the horror and mystery elements, and therefore excluding facts like that in canon there's probably going to be homophobia themes to the story iirc. This is how I imagine it'd unfold if it just happened normally without whatever scariness is going on in Home as a factor.
Also I like playing around with lots of different ideas and dynamics and interpretations; this is just a bit of fun.
Transcripts (and a bunch of extra explanations/info) under the concealment charm! ⬇️
Sally:
Has no idea, because she's not paying attention to them.
Would be like "Cool. Now about MY NEXT PLAY!" if it was pointed out to her.
Unless she could make it into something dramatic.
(Extra: like if she thought of a way to basically make a performance out of it, I can imagine she'd do that. Eddie and Frank would both think she was being very strange.)
Poppy:
K N O W S
Possibly before even Eddie does, and trying to drop him hints.
Thinks they'd be wonderful together.
(Extra: She wouldn't think it was her place to say anything outright, especially because that could risk outing either of them, but she'd be like "Frank can be very protective of you, you know..." HINT HINT.)
Howdy:
Has a vague suspicion.
Doesn't think it's really his business.
DOES think they're cute together.
(Extra: it wouldn't really interest or concern him much so he wouldn't feel a need to offer input or say anything, but he would sometimes see them talking and be like 'lmao these bitches gay! good for them, good for them,' in his head.)
Wally:
Knows Eddie & Frank 'love each other' but is unclear on how this differs from how he loves all his neighbours.
Would be very happy for them if someone explained it to him.
(Extra: he wouldn't pick up on anything particularly special about them/their relationship, he just assumes that all his neighbours love each other because, in his opinion, what's not to love. He'd also likely be one of the first people either of them would feel comfortable telling.)
(Extra 2: also no-one would ever explain it to him properly. Eddie would get into embarrassed blethering and Frank wouldn't know what to say beyond that it's "just different," Barnaby would keep giving joke answers, Poppy and Howdy would just be like 🤷not my place, and Sally and Julie would keep telling him things that only made him more confused.)
Barnaby:
Would eventually pick up on it, and take great joy in teasing either of them.
Ultimately supportive, though.
(Extra: He'd greatly enjoy irritating Frank and making Eddie flustered in ways that meant nobody else but them knew what he was hinting at lol)
Julie:
#1 Frank X Eddie shipper.
She finds out because Frank talks to her about their feelings, and she's rooting for them from then on.
(Extra: she'd try to be Frank's wingman and just end up confusing and scaring Eddie and making Frank facepalm.)
#innisthoughts#welcome home arg#welcome home#frank frankly#eddie dear#frank x eddie#ACK now I'm thinking about Eddie confiding in Wally while they do crafts together that's too cute.#I've actually finished a few fics but felt self-conscious posting#I think it's because they're quite romance heavy in general#and if I write too much ship stuff I start to feel sad like I'm a “fake aroace” or some shit lmaooo#like I'm letting myself and the aroaspec community down by not focusing on how wonderful platonic relationships are on their own#and knowing that it's dumb as hell and that I adore friendships just as much does nothing to alleviate my concerns
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My Suha - By Chahyun (9/10)
The long wait was worth it. This is a long, dramatic read that features a surprising amount of realism. If you're looking for a light rich guy/secretary story go somewhere else. The side characters are great. The villains are hateable, and there is no perfect happy ending. Life doesn't work like that.
Suha is kind of a slut. He's 32 and he isn't into commitment. He has a favorite gay bar. He's got a great job as a corporate secretary, because he's got great connections. The owner of the company is basically his grandmother, so he was able to get opportunities that would otherwise not be possible. His father died, so grandma CEO took his whole family in. It's kind of implied that he was an important employee, and grandma owed him alot of favors. How sweet...
Not.
Suha is basically a modern indentured servant. CEO Grandma is the ultimate villain, who always believes she is right. Question everything. Alot of the people in Suha's past have used him.
Suha used to care for grannies not-so-beloved grandson, Jiwoon, when he was still a child. Jiwoon was "slow". He is the black sheep of the family. His parents abandoned him. His father left the family because, shocker, Granny was so controlling that she tried to force him to get a divorce. Apparently, his wife wasn't good enough. That's a sane and nice thing to say. His father ran off with his wife, but he left his son behind. He believed that his son should benefit from the family fortune. His father wasn't confident enough. He thought Jiwoon would resent him one day, if he took away the boy's chance to be rich and privileged.
Jiwoon, of course, quickly developed abandonment issues and his health got bad. Grandma favors her other grandson, from her more obedient son. Jiwoon dealt with near constant emotional abuse and neglect. In a gold cage, with five star food.
Suha was his only light, and Suha has no clue.
Suha becomes Jiwoon's secretary. It's a coincidence. Jiwoon is really, really repressed. He is also bisexual. He's had a crush on Suha for uh...about 15 years??? He wanted to get over it, but he couldn't. He's really, really good at repressing his emotions. Grandma and Suha don't even know he's interested in men.
He starts to snap slowly.
This is Ms. Choi. We love Ms. Choi. We love all the side characters that aren't villains. She's a potential wife for Jiwoon, but she notices he's crazy first. She knows he's dead serious about being with Suha forever. Suha sure doesn't. He doesn't figure it out for ages. Ms. Choi's sharp instincts are our first real hint.
Something Is Very Wrong With Him.
Suha and Jiwoon start hooking up.
Suha thinks it's not serious. Jiwoon plays along. He tells white lies, but he does want to date.
Small problem.
Suha "dated" his extremely abusive and spoiled brother. You know, the grandson granny prefers???
Do-hyeok is a monster. He only thinks about using the people around him for cash or pleasure. He's also into men, and women. He's a lecherous and merciless person. Suha has always been an attractive man. He took advantage of Suha's youth, and his grateful debt to granny, to drag him into a casual relationship.
Suha genuinely loved him. Do-hyeok pressured him into group play, and it basically got to the point where he was Suha's pimp. What happened in their relationship is...detailed and awful, and it explains why Suha is so afraid of commitment.
He thinks love doesn't last.
Jiwoon really does love Suha. He lays it on thick. He waits for Suha to get more comfortable. They go to the gym in matching clothes. Jiwoon sometimes follows him around. Jiwoon sometimes uses Suha's sister to track his location, daily life, and habits. Jiwoon knows what he likes in bed. Jiwoon hates his whole family and the company that currently makes him rich.
He has no friends.
He is the same antisocial boy he was.
He's just better at hiding it.
Do-hyeok attacks Suha. It's an amazing and dramatic arc. Suha bites his tongue and he ends up saving Jiwoon in the end too. It's great. Love wins. The evil is defeated.
....Jiwoon starts to get more controlling after Suha is injured.
He steals Suha's phone.
He tells Suha to quit his job, and somehow things still keep escalating.
We reach a breaking point where Suha is constantly reassuring his boyfriend. Jiwoon begs Suha to stay. He says he's everything, but that's too much. After a whole month of bring imprisoned with lies Suha snaps.
After the Do-hyeok situation Suha was put on leave to recover. Jiwoon extended this leave, and he started isolating Suha. Suha has friends and a loving family. All of them start looking for him. Jiwoon goes off the deep end, believing that Suha will delete everyone and wait at home for him forever.
It's all for his sake.
Jiwoon takes Do-hyeok down, while Suha is locked up in a safe luxury apartment. His fraudulent spending is exposed thanks to Suha's amazing friends and Jiwoon's obsessive desire for vengeance. Justice comes, but when it does Suha wants to go back to work.
Jiwoon doesn't want him to go back to work.
Suha leaves the prison of love, and he says he needs a break.
After a break Jiwoon tells Suha to come back to work. He does. Jiwoon has become his old self. The shell of perfection with no particular feelings for anyone. The perfect businessman, but his clothes are even nicer. He looks great. Suha thinks that he may have moved on, but Jiwoon is trying to be normal so he can be the right partner for Suha.
Suha says he loves Jiwoon. He doesn't have to be perfect and polite all the time....but uhhhh hiding his phone, using his sister, and trying to eliminate all of his friends...wasn't good.
Suha and Jiwoon go visit Jiwoon's parents, so the healing process can begin. It turns out that Jiwoon has two adult siblings he will never know. His parents had them after they abandoned him. He decides that he can't forgive them, but he wishes them well.
He moves on to a better chapter of his life, with Suha.
I would have made this review longer, but this story really is worth reading. It's dramatic, but the characters feel real and rough and sad. They're adults in their thirties struggling with being queer and lonely and emotional baggage. Jiwoon is also an enjoyable yandere, who does deserve his bittersweet happy ending.
#yandere#male yandere#yandere male#yandere boy#recommendations#recs#rec#recommended#webtoon#yaoi#my suha
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the thing is that riverdale is both the ultimate culmination of generations of network genre tv (crazy, campy, gay, unafraid to be unserious about being serious) & also feels like an end of at least a kind of genre tv. feels like there’s been a shift towards more serious, prestige genre tv, which can be fine & good, but doesn’t leave as much room for something in the vein of xena or buffy etc etc. maybe i’m just being sad & dramatic but it feels like the end of an era.
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'When the companies behind Ira Sachs’ new drama about the shifting currents of intimacy in a troubled love triangle submitted Passages to the Motion Picture Association ratings board, they probably anticipated an R.
But the MPA came back with an NC-17 rating, forcing the distributor to release the film (which premiered at Sundance earlier this year) unrated rather than risk commercial marginalization or impose cuts that would diminish its intensity...
Let’s be clear: Passages — which Mubi opened Aug. 4 in Los Angeles and New York before expanding to other cities in the weeks to come — is a movie with a generous amount of sex, both gay and straight. But it’s neither particularly explicit nor remotely gratuitous, even if it’s frequently quite hot.
The sex is, above all, integral to the movie’s emotional texture, to the way the characters navigate their volatile relationships, the way they express their feelings and explore their connections through their bodies as they come together and pull apart. In other words, the film’s candor in depicting sex and nudity nudges it closer to European cinema than American.
The ratings controversy around Sachs’ movie comes just as Oppenheimer has been generating talk on social media and in the press about being the first Christopher Nolan movie to feature sex scenes. The trysts between Cillian Murphy as scientist J. Robert Oppenheimer and Florence Pugh as his lover both before and during the former’s marriage earned the release an R rating, which is standard given the glimpses of sweaty flesh on view.
But the fact that people are talking about it at all — and no one has been talking about it louder than Nolan himself — just underlines how squeamish American movies are about sex and sensuality.
The sex scenes in both those movies serve a clear narrative purpose. In Nolan’s film, they convey the magnetism of Oppenheimer and its ultimately devastating effect on a woman who, while not really on screen long enough to acquire much complexity, is defined by her intellectual curiosity, political radicalism and carnal desire.
The actual intercourse — once during the affair and once years later, as a haunting specter conjured in a security hearing — is brief and somewhat mechanical, while a long post-coital discussion has Murphy and Pugh sitting naked in armchairs on opposite sides of a room, carefully positioned and framed to keep crotches out of sight. The scene looks like an interview for an admin job at a nudist colony. It’s anything but erotic.
The scene in the Paris-set Passages that evidently had the MPA clutching their pearls, by contrast, is erotically and emotionally charged, raunchy and tender. It takes place after narcissistic German filmmaker Tomas (Franz Rogowski) has strayed outside his marriage to English print-maker Martin (Ben Whishaw) with Agathe (Adèle Exarchapoulos), a French schoolteacher he met at the wrap party for his latest feature.
Back in bed with Martin again, Tomas more or less offers himself up, resulting in sex that could be a bid for forgiveness, a reconciliation, a sad acknowledgment of enduring feelings or a manipulative attempt by Tomas to keep a hold on his husband while continuing to explore a new relationship. Or it could be all of those things.
Like the movie’s other sex scenes, it’s dramatically loaded, and although it’s shot in a single take with no artful draping of the sheets, it’s hardly graphic...
The prim attitude toward sex in American movies goes beyond MPA rulings to Hollywood itself. Sex and unapologetic sensuality have been all but banished from the mainstream since the heyday of erotic thrillers in the 1980s and early ‘90s — films like Dressed to Kill, American Gigolo, Body Heat, Basic Instinct, 9½ Weeks, The Last Seduction, Color of Night and Sliver. People onscreen were getting laid and loving it back then.
What happened to make American movies so desexualized? As the holdover artistic spirit of the emancipated ‘70s faded further into the distance, studios became increasingly corporate and less creative in their thinking. In order to be profitable, movies had to play not only across the U.S. — including conservative Red states and Bible Belt regions — but internationally, where many countries have rigidly imposed codes concerning sex and nudity.
The ascendance of the superhero movie has been another nail in the coffin of sensuality. In the Superman films of the late ‘70s and early ‘80s, there was most definitely something cooking between Christopher Reeve and Margot Kidder. But in the more recent wave of comic book-inspired action fare, the protagonists are so sexless they might as well be genital-free Kens and Barbies...
Where, in film, is the supposed sex-positive movement that has become part of the cultural conversation? Cable and streaming platforms have stepped into the breach with shows that don’t hold back on steamy content — think Girls, Insecure, P-Valley, Bridgerton, Game of Thrones, Euphoria and The White Lotus.
So is the dearth of grownup attitudes toward sex and sensuality on big screens a stagnant situation or a step backwards? Many would argue convincingly that it’s been that way since the late ‘90s. But it’s also conceivable that we’re in a unique perfect-storm moment, where far-right conservatism has converged with post-MeToo liberal timidity. On social media, some Gen-Z filmgoers have even questioned whether sex scenes have a place in movies. Seriously, kids, you need to get out more.
The presence of intimacy coordinators on set has no doubt helped to ensure an environment of increased safety and trust for actors, establishing essential boundaries of body autonomy. But unlike so many uninhibited European screen stars, the majority of major-name American performers remain shy about stripping down and going at it.
Witness Penn Badgley declaring his dislike of filming intimate scenes and his insistence on less sex and skin for his character in season 4 of Netflix’s You out of respect for his marriage. “That aspect of Hollywood has always been very disturbing to me,” said the actor in a Variety interview. But many of us who bemoan the shortage of full-blooded sensuality at the multiplex might wonder which Hollywood he’s talking about.'
#Penn Badgley#You#Oppenheimer#Cillian Murphy#Florence Pugh#Passages#Ira Sachs#Christopher Nolan#Ben Whishaw#Franz Rogowski#Netflix#American Gigolo#Nine and a half Weeks#Adèle Exarchapoulos#Basic Instinct
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My dear lgbt+ kids,
At some point in my life, I probably saw two strangers doing something together and just assumed that they are in a romantic relationship - even though they were platonic friends.
Most likely it was a situation like “Ohh, there is the waiter with my food! Finally!... never mind, it’s for the couple over there”. Just some random moment where I made an automatic judgment about their relationship status without even consciously thinking about it.
I do not remember it happening but how would I? Unless I randomly overheard them loudly discussing the fact that they are not dating, there's no way my mistake would become apparent. I'd just finish my meal and leave the restaurant none the wiser.
Another reason I wouldn't remember it is that the world didn’t crash and burn. I did not singlehandedly erase the concept of friendship. They were not forcibly married right there in the restaurant by the sheer power of my thoughts. They left the restaurant as friends, just like they entered it. And me? Well, the wrong assumption didn't magically turn me into some weird pervert who pushes the heads of random strangers together and yells "Now kiss for my enjoyment!". I also left the restaurant just like I entered it: ignorant about their personal relationship - something that ultimately has no bearing on anyone's actual life whatsoever.
Yeah, I am being dramatic and silly here. Nobody would actually expect any of that to happen, would they? But some people do freak out about queer fans making an assumption about fictional characters and their relationships.
I keep seeing panicky comments about it - two characters of the same sex can't be friends anymore without some people on the internet shipping them! They are erasing the concept of friendship! This will lead to kids missing out on important platonic connections with the same gender and ultimately leave them unable to connect to anyone at all unless it's sexually!
Oftentimes this is simply a way to justify homophobia. Saying you are worried about the kids causes less backlash than "Eww, gays are yucky".
But sometimes it comes from inside the house, from people who are actually queer themselves - this can be internalized homophobia but it may also be an overestimation of the impact of queer internet fandom. Many of us spend a lot of time there because it's a (fairly) safe space for us... but it's important to remember that tumblr doesn't properly represent the real world in many aspects. Gay shipping is essentially a (comparatively small) group of people re-telling stories as a hobby. This can be very meaningful for the people in the group - but it won't influence the entire world. Fandom will never erase the concept of friendship. It's really not widespread or powerful enough for that.
Panicking about that is unnecessary - just like freaking out about me potentially assigning the wrong relationship status to the people at the table next to me would be.
With all my love,
Your Tumblr Dad
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