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joy1579 · 4 years

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RFA discovers MC is secretly a neko girl (mc hides that she has cat ears and a tail as well as some catlike tendencies)

so these things just keep getting longer and maybe I should change them to like legit-ly written scenarios but I’m lazy and this one was already formatted this way so, yeah sorry guys.

oh also I have a master list now. I try to update it every time I post something! Master list

Jumin

Elated. F***ing loves you. You give him opinions on all the cat related businesses.

- The first time he saw you he knew you were the one for him

- You were dressed so nicely in an ankle length skirt and sun hat

- Elizabeth the 3rd was curious about you from the start

- He had never seen her so interested in a stranger before

- As you stayed with him though he noticed some strange things

- He never saw you without some sort of head covering even though you didn’t seem to enjoy wearing them

- You also knew what Elizabeth the 3rd needed before she even mewed. As though you could tell what she wanted from the smallest flick of her tail

- One day he came home to you curled up on the floor near the window and part of him panicked

- He rushed to check on you but stopped short the second he saw you hat half off

- A tan cat ear twitched slightly in some unknown dream as your chest your rose slowly with your breath

- He cursed his ever so slightly shaking hand as he reached to stroke behind that cute ear

- He would never admit to the flutter in his heart as you mewled softly at his touch before stretching lazily

- You yawned and looked around as you woke slowly

- The second you saw him though you jumped back

- He saw you relax a bit once your eye’s met his

- But he motioned to the top of his head, a smirking just a bit and you lifted your hand to mirror his movment

- That’s when you felt your ears free and exposed. You start to panic all over again and in a second his arms are around you

- “MC it’s okay calm down” he says lowly

- “no no its, it’s not, Jumin you can’t say anything okay! Not to anyone! I don’t know what will happen if this gets out but, it won’t be good. you know that right? This is a secret.” You said shaking in his arms

- he squeezes you tighter and you feel his lips against the top of your head

- “your secret is safe with me. You are safe with me.” He whispers into your hair as though those words were all that mattered in the world.

- For you, they were.

- The next moment you were hugging him back and purring thankfully as you nuzzled into his chest “Thank you Jumin”

- The next time he came home you wore shorts and went hatless. You looked so much more comfortable since your ears and tail could move freely

- All his hugs include ear scratches that make you purr and close your eyes happily

- You squeeze your way into his lap when you want attention and he doesn’t think he’s ever been happier.

Yoosung

shook. Legit worried because do you need a vet or a doctor. Doubles down on his studies just in case.

- You tell him after the RFA party You knew, KNEW he was the one so you had to tell him.

- As the rest of the RFA is cleaning up you offer to drive Yoosung back to the hospital

- At a stoplight on the way you tell him and show him your ears

- He passes out. You panic and floor it to the hospital

- They assure you he’s fine but you stay until he wakes up

- “MC I had the weirdest dream.” He tells you. You try not to laugh as he talks about how you had the cutest cat ears he had ever seen.

- You lift your hat up just enough for him to get a peak of one of your ears and wink at him

- His heart rate jumps and you start to think maybe you shouldn’t be teasing him when he’s in such fragile condition

- But the way he splutters and turns red is way too cute so you lean down to kiss his lips

- “this, this isn’t real.” He says “this is too good to be real” you laugh and assure him you’ll be here until he wakes up again.

- He holds your hand as the pain meds pull him into sleep while he mutters about what a funny dream this was.

- The next week is comprised of you teasing him with sneak glances of your ears or tail only when he’s sleep addled or just a little buzzed on pain meds

- You have to admit the constant praise of how cute, soft, and pretty your ears and tail are is, nice. Since most people never saw them it was nice to hear what he thought of them.

- Even if he was still convinced it was just his imagination

- Then he was sent home and you decided to REALLY tell him what was going on

- “is this cuz of all my dreams MC? I didn’t think you’d take it this far!” you sigh and take his hand to feel your ear twitch

- You have never seen him so red he’s gone beyond his normal panicked spluttering and into silence

- You’re actually starting to worry now because he’s been standing there silently doing his best impression of a goldfish for a while now

- “Yoosung?” you ask tail flicking anxiously

- “it’s real?” he manages as his fingers begin to slowly scratch at your ear

- You’re a little distracted by his scratching but you try to explain anyway

- “you can’t, um you can’t tell anyone though okay Yoosung.”

- “huh why” he asked looking at your ears in awe bringing another hand up absently to pet your hair

- But the petting was getting really distracting now and you had to stop the urge to purr though you couldn’t help your instinct to nuzzle your head into his hands

- “I don’t” you really were trying to focus here but people didn’t scratch your ears often since they were always hidden “people won’t” you lost your train of thought again as his fingers curled under your ear to stoke through your hair again

- You jerked away immediately glaring at him ready to scold him for distracting you

- But when you met his eyes you could practically see stars in his eye’s

- “MC did you just purr? Because I was petting you?” he asked looking happier than you’d ever seen anyone look in your life

- You shake your head before chuckling at him “you’re lucky I love you”

Saeyoung

so many questions. Tests what cat traits you have. Cat puns. Understands your secrecy.

- You had no medical history. That was weird.

- Home birth, home school, home job. home EVERYTHING.

- Your record was sparse to say the least. So he checked you out on the apartment CCTV

- Even your clothes seemed to hide you away. So of course he was curious

- He dug deeper, found your social media and while he enjoyed learning about your interest’s and he certainly enjoyed the memes you posted it didn’t give him anymore solid info to go off of.

- So he kept checking the CCTV to learn more and then he saw you in your pajamas he was embarrassed and started to look away. He may be a hacker but even he had limits. But then he saw them

- Cat ears and a tail how cute he didn’t know you liked cosplay you hadn’t mentioned it on social media

- But how did you make them move like that. he had to know so next time you two met in the chat he asked

- He’s confused and watching you scramble on the CCTV to cover your ears and tail

- you exited the chat right away and called seven

- “seven you can’t tell anyone. I swear this is really bad! You shouldn’t know about this. What the hell were you thinking spying on me like that.”

- He sobers up hearing your panic and anger

- After a moment of calming you down and promising he’ll straighten things out on the messenger he hangs up

- Then things happened and he was there. answered the door and locked eyes with him

- He hadn’t meant to ask but before he could stop himself the words had tumbled out of his mouth

- “Can I see your ears” and his face was red because he was supposed to have better self-control he knew this was a sensitive topic for you

- But you nodded and once the door was shut you slipped you hat from you head

- Saeyoung’s hand was immediately reaching out but he stopped short at the sight of your clenched shut eyes as though you were ready to be hit.

- He could recognize that face anywhere, braced and ready to take whatever blow was coming

- “sorry I should have asked may I touch them”

- You nodded sharply still tense but he saw you unclench your jaw and flex your finger out of there tight fist

- His fingers gently skimmed across you left ear and moved behind it to scratch there the way he knew cats enjoyed and you purred before you could stop yourself

- Your hands shot up to cover your mouth and your face burned

- Saeyoungs eyes where wide and you could see his blush clear as day

- Then his arms where around you and you were pulled tight against his chest

- After that he made it his mission to see just how catlike you were

- He tried lasers, no effect unless you were really drunk Cat nip, you liked the scent but no more than anyone else might like the smell of flowers. He was too afraid to test the whole cats land on their feet thing but just judging by you balance he assumed you could probably do that.

- When you felt down he called you kitty cutie and pet your head. He loved you.

Zen

wants to make it work. Lays off dissing Elizabeth. Really doesn’t want to tell Jumin why though.

- You tried not to fall for him, tried to push him away

- He was allergic to cats, he was allergic to you

- The first time you went to meet him you took precautions

- You showered twice as long, brushed your hair ears and tail extra so you wouldn’t lose a single strand

- You tied your hair in a tight band and hid it in your hat with your ears you even tucked you tail away in the shorts you wore under your long skirt

- But he was still sneezing like crazy

- You felt awful, and you were sure this relationship would never work.

- So you told him

- You tried not to cry, you didn’t want to make it harder on him, and you tended to sound like a mewling kitten

- Then you saw the hurt in his eyes and he wanted a reason and he was holding your hand and you could hear the hurt in his voice

- And you were crying. The second you started you knew the jig was up his eyes where wide now and he was pulling your free hand away from your face

- “MC how did you make that sound?”

- You shook your head and removed you hat to show him

- “are those? Are those real?” your ears folded downwards mournfully in response giving him his answer even as you nodded “and this is why we can’t see each other?”

- “I tried to make it easier! I brushed my ears and, and” you took a shuddering halting breath “I tried so hard”

- He took a deep breath and pulled you into his arms “we can figure something out”

- “I can’t do that to you your miserable look even your face is swelling!” you cried

- The next time you saw him at the RFA party you kept him at an arm’s length. You had taken all the precautions but you knew it wasn’t enough so you kept your distance

- Every time Zen approached you, you made an excuse to dart away

- Until he cornered you

- “don’t avoid me” he said sternly “if you don’t want to see me that fine but don’t avoid me because you think you’re not worth me sneezing”

- You were blinking back tears you would not cry again you told yourself

- “I don’t want to hurt you”

- “I’ll buy medicine, we’ll get air-filters, there’s even shots I could get. I love you. Allergies can’t change that”

- Slowly you two found what worked. He saw an allergy specialist once a month, you had filters in every room, you showered twice a day and brushed yourself morning and night.

- He even signed up for an experimental new treatment that was doing winders for him

- The first time you nuzzled your head into his neck and purred his name he knew he made the right decision

- No amount of pain in the world would make him give up that moment

- He still claimed not to be a cat person saying you were the only exception

- And you had to admit you were okay with that

Jaehee

confused but calm. Asks you how you keep fur off your clothes. Learns, slowly to be okay with the stray hair here and there.

- You tell her the day before the café opens

- She’s pretty sure this is a prank by seven but then you show her your ears (it’s easier than trying to free your tail from your long skirt without flashing her)

- She was quiet, then she stood and began to walk away. You honestly started to panic.

- She did hate watching Elizabeth after all you had thought it was only because of the extra work and cleaning

- But maybe she had some other reason for hating cats

- “Jaehee?” you called shakily “I, I’m sorry. I should have told you sooner but I thought, well I thought it wouldn’t be this big a deal. I know you like things neat and tidy and sometimes fur messes that up but I promise I can clean up after myself. I know all the secrets and I’ll take responsibility for the extra cleaning. I, I really like you.”

- By this you were fighting desperately not to cry

- Then she turned around with two cups of coffees

- “MC I’m not mad. I just need some time to figure this out” she said strolling over to set one of the cups in front of you

- “I suppose we won’t need hairnets for your ears since you keep them in your hat.”

- You smiled at her. You knew this was her way of accepting you.

- She took a sip of her coffee and you couldn’t help yourself. You reached across the small table and took her free hand in yours

- “well to be honest I’ve given it some thought and maybe I could learn to make latte art? they could be catpuccino’s” you joked and to your delight she chuckled

- “You’ve spent too much time with seven, but that is a good idea”

- As time goes by she becomes more and more comfortable with your cat characteristic.

- You won’t admit she finds your cat naps in the sun to be cute, but she’s got a folder on her phone dedicated to pictures of them

- She admires how carful you are with Zens allergies and is thankful you’re so understanding.

- You hum while you make the cat latte art and she thinks it’s cute that you sound like a cat when you do (she thinks it also might boost sales but that’s just a guess)

- She secretly revels in the fact that as much as Jumin loves cats you chose her and sided with her in the messenger

- She asks if you can talk to cats. You think it’s because she has a few choice words to share with Elizabeth the 3rd

- You explain that while you can understand cats more than most people it’s not like talking to people it’s more like reading body language and tone

- She shakes her head and mumbles “yeah that makes sense, it’s just a cat after all”

- You give Elizabeth a bit of the cold shoulder anyway

- As you two grow closer she starts to absently pet you while you watch Zen DVD’s

- When you start to purr she’s so surprised she misses her favorite scene

- She’s so flustered as she rewinds you can’t help but giggle and kiss her on the cheek

- Which absolutely does not help her calm down at all

#mystic messenger #mysme #mm #jumin #jumin han #yoosung #yoosung kim #saeyoung #saeyoung choi #zen #hyun ryu #jaehee #jaehee kang #msyme mc #msyme headcannon

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miraculoussage · 4 years

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Breaking Out

Sorry for the lack of formatting regarding this section. My laptop charger broke so I’m currently stuck with mobile, and I am not great at mobile text organization. Also sorry for the lack of a read-more. Once again, mobile :( fixed bc i have a laptop again B)

Rating: General

Characters: Adrien Agreste/Chat Noir main character; lots of other characters making an appearance, lots of Plagg, Marinette/Ladybug, and Gabriel

Relationships: Light love-square (pre-relationship)

Other tags: Trans boy Adrien, mostly closeted trans Adrien, transphobia (no transphobic violence), mentions of a dead name but no actual use of the dead name, misgendering, mentions of Dysphoria; supportive friends, Gabriel Agreste is a soggy tissue, minor mentions of diet control, minor redesigns of LB and CN costumes, major redesigns of civilian Adrien bc closet trans. Use of the word queer as an identifier and not a slur.

Part 2

♪~ ᕕ(ᐛ)ᕗ

The worst thing about being a popular fashion model, Adrien thought, was his image pasted all over the city. He had to see himself in the mirror enough as it was; seeing himself dressed up in the most feminine clothes his father could design, his long blond hair professionally styled into curls and braids and up-dos, and with enough makeup for three circus clowns made his skin itch. All of Paris, all of the world saw him as he was on the billboards and posters, in heavily edited magazine photos, set on backgrounds of flowers and butterflies. Everyone saw Adrien as a girl, Gabriel Agreste’s beautiful model daughter. Everyone except himself.

He had thought about coming out to his mother and father before, but while he was trying to find the nerve or the right moment, he overheard his father firing one of his models for coming out as trans. After that, his anxiety grew. He could never tell his parents, especially his father, not until he was living on his own and not relying on his modelling career and his father for survival.

Even when he went to school for the first time, he had to introduce himself as his dead name and endure the misgendering. He had considered coming out to Chloe, too, but while she didn’t seem to be transphobic, he didn’t trust her enough to keep it a secret. She thrived on gossip, sometimes even at the expense of her friends. Whether or not it was on purpose didn’t exactly matter to Adrien in this situation.

Plagg was the first person he ever came out to, not entirely on purpose. When he transformed into Chat Noir the first time, he actually cried for a few minutes. He felt different and he felt right and when he caught his reflection in a mirror he saw exactly who he wanted to be. Aside from his inhuman eyes and the strangeness of the costume, of course. His hair was short and messy and the makeup his father insisted he wear every day was entirely gone.

His costume was thick black leather, covering his whole body up to his neck where a bell sat at his collar. There was soft padding on his shoulders, elbows, and knees, barely visible under the leather. He had black combat boots with green soles that reached half way up his calf, laced with bright green laces, and lined with soft material if the same colour. His gloves, too, were black leather with soft green lining, claws on the fingers. Over the black bodysuit, he had a sleeveless hoodie; the fabric was looser and lighter than the leather, it almost seemed like cotton except it was sleek and waterproof. The pouch pocket was bright green with a single black paw print in the middle. All of the lining was the same bright green, visible in the hood and extending to the hems of the shirt. The hood itself had spaces cut out for the leather cat ears on his head, and fit loose and comfortable without falling over his eyes. Most importantly to Adrien, his chest was entirely flat without pressure.

After the first Akuma was stopped and Adrien transformed back, Plagg was suddenly gentle where he wasn’t before. “So what was that, then? What are your pronouns? Got a different name than the one I know?” After answering the questions and having another emotional moment, Plagg was back to being aloof and snarky, seemingly only concerned with cheese.

Adrien warmed up to the little cat-god fast. It felt more than amazing to be called the right thing for once, and Plagg at the least acknowledged his angry and frustrated rants about anything related to his gender that he’d never been able to share with anyone before. “As long as you keep giving me cheese,” Plagg had said, but somewhere along the way the meaning of the sentence changed to “always”, unspoken but genuine.

At school, things started out nice despite the rough start from being Chloe’s friend. The misgendering and dead name weighed down on him, though, and soon his new friends shared their concern about him. No one had any idea what it was about. It could be anything from his father to his mother to his modelling to just not getting enough sleep, but he’d hidden himself enough that no one would ever guess what it truly was about.

Nino was good about (sort of) silent comfort, offering to talk about it but relenting easily and moving to sharing music, food, memes, stories, and just a comforting presence. Alya always tried to figure out what was wrong and when she came to her own conclusions she would give him advice, though it was never the advice he needed. And Marinette...

Though Marinette was shy and got flustered easily, when her friends were in pain, she would stop at nothing to help them feel better. When he sighed about going home at the end of the day, she would invite him over to do homework, which usually ended up actually being video games. It became almost a routine by the spring, the two of them (and sometimes their friends) hanging out in the Dupain-Cheng apartment, snacking on yesterday’s left-over pastries while they played games, watched movies, talked, or rarely actually doing homework. Marinette’s parents were incredibly kind to Adrien, he was even envious that Marinette had such a supportive family. She was open about her biromantic identity, and never suffered for it at home.

As a result of their time spent together and Marinette’s own tendencies to not back down from helping her friends, she was the second person he came out to. It was a mess of tears between them, and Marinette apologized profusely for the misgendering, despite having no idea she was doing it. It made Adrien laugh, which made Marinette laugh, and then they were both laughing and crying at the same time. When Sabine came up to check on them, Adrien found he didn’t care that she was seeing him like this, and didn’t try to hide his identity from her anymore. Then, Sabine was crying with them, hugging Adrien close and giving him all the affirmations he never got from another human. (It was then that he decided he was now Adrien Dupain-Cheng, and she and Tom were his new parents.)

They all understood how important it was to keep this new information a secret, from everyone. If it got to his father or, gods forbid, the media, everything would go to hell in a hand basket. Marinette helped him fix his makeup before he left, apologizing even more about him needing to wear it. As usual, Sabine snuck some fresh pastries into his bag while he pretended not to notice when she hugged him goodbye. On the way out, Tom stopped him. The bakery was empty, just closed for the evening minutes before. “Adrien,” the news had reached him earlier via Sabine, “if you ever ever need a place to go for any reason, you’re always welcome here. No questions asked, any time day or night.” He had to hand a napkin to Adrien, tears gathering in his eyes again. As Adrien’s car pulled up to the front of the bakery, they said goodbye for the night, and Adrien was on his way back to the mansion. It wasn’t home, not anymore.

He came out to Ladybug third, but he didn’t know if it counted as third when he was Chat Noir. It was a rather casual interaction, against all expectations. The two of them were jogging across rooftops, keeping their eyes out for any sort of problem, just a regular Saturday patrol. They were talking about TV shows, sharing their theories for the next episode and the rest of the season; Ladybug theorized that one of the characters was a trans man, and Chat Noir seized the opportunity without a second thought. “Oh, like me,” he said, and Ladybug didn’t even blink. She just smiled at him, and he smiled back. Before they parted for the night, she thanked him for trusting her with his secret and promised it was safe with her. “I know, my Lady, I wouldn’t have told you if I thought you wouldn’t.” Nothing even changed between them after that, though Ladybug did seem to talk more openly about queer subjects when they came up.

He came out to other classmates and friends on a case by case basis, with Marinette there for support every time. Nathaniel, Alix, Nino, Rose and Juleka, Kagami. People he could trust entirely to keep it a secret and that he knew weren’t queerphobic from their time knowing each other. He always had some anxiety about it anyways, but with constant unspoken support from Marinette and her parents, it didn’t seem as daunting as before. Nathaniel drew pictures of him with different styles of short hair and more masculine outfits, “for when you’re able to choose your appearance”. Marinette had helped Nathaniel design the outfits, and she had plenty more in her own sketchbook designed just for Adrien. Alix and Nino casually called him “dude” and “bro”, a way to affirm him without actually outing him, since the terms were so casual and usually neutral.

As his support outside of the mansion grew, Adrien realized day after day just how terribly he was treated by his father, and Natalie and the other staff by proxy. Aside from his father’s thinly veiled queerphobia, he also controlled Adrien’s diet, his schedule, his social life, his career, his finances, and almost every aspect of his life. Before going to school, he thought most families were like that. It wasn’t until Alya complained about being saddled with babysitting again and the others lamented with her that three evenings that week was a bit excessive that Adrien realized most of his classmates actually got to decided what they did in their spare time without having to beg for permission. They got to choose what to eat for lunch, some even got to make their own food, and they didn’t have to follow a strict diet. They weren’t constantly afraid of their parents punishing them at the slightest mistake.

He spent more and more time at the Dupain-Cheng’s, at home, they even gave him his own key. More than once they’d woken up early to open the bakery, just to find him curled up on the couch in his clothes from the day before, the throw blanket wrapped tightly around him. Marinette made plenty of casual clothes and loungewear for him, until half of her closet was his. They almost always had a plate of leftovers from dinner with his name on it in the fridge. One afternoon, they surprised Adrien; the room that was formerly the office was converted into a full bedroom with his clothes moved into the closet already. The room was even decorated, soft green and light grey, paintings on the walls, a desk with a silver cat paperweight next to a lamp. Plagg seemed even more excited about it than Adrien was, which was saying a lot because Adrien was over the moon. They really were serious about the “anytime, no questions asked”.

After three years of school and crime fighting, Adrien made the biggest decision in his life. He talked to the bank and a lawyer. He had his rightful savings moved from the account under his father’s surveillance to a brand new private account. He had his friends and real family at his back. And then, he came out to his father. It went about as well as he expected; Gabriel threw a fit, accused Adrien of acting out for attention, and ultimately ended up locking Adrien in his room and forbidding him from going to school. Fortunately for Adrien, he had an escape plan in the form of a magical ring.

He was across the city in a matter of minutes, detransformed, and contacting his lawyer. His emancipation was officially in process. He texted the Dupain-Cheng family chat letting them know he told his father and it didn’t go well, but he was not in the house and he was safe. They were the only ones who knew about his plan, given they were part of it all. Though the idea of living full time with Marinette gave him butterflies, he could ignore his crush for everyone’s comfort.

Before his father or Natalie had a chance to suspend his access to his accounts, he made an Instagram post. A photo of himself, no makeup and his hair pulled back into a bun so it wasn’t so visible, wearing one of the more formal outfits Marinette made for him (a blue suit with a white undershirt and a pink bow tie). It had been taken a few days earlier, in front of a nondescript grey wall in his bedroom, unable to be linked to any location. As the caption, he wrote “Adrien Agreste, he/him, proudly trans! Stay strong, and know you are loved.” He posted it in as many transgender and fashion tags as he could, and was happy to see screenshots of it spreading almost immediately before it was taken down from his own account and his access was cut off. He texted Marinette one last time to tell her he would be unable to contact her over the phone, then turned the phone off, left it on a nearby cafe table, and disappeared down an alley. Thirty seconds later, Chat Noir was vaulting between buildings, headed nowhere in particular.

Stick around for part 2! ♪~ ᕕ(ᐛ)ᕗ

#miraculous ladybug #miraculous ladybug au #trans adrien agreste #sage writes #ml #ml fanfic #uhhhh gabriel agreste could be eaten by a dinosaur and it would still be too good of a fate for him #we feelin the DYSPHORIA 2nite lads

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abreathofthewild · 4 years

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And They Were Roommates, Chapter 1/?

Summary: After the events of Endgame, the Avengers try to regain a semblance of normalcy. Steve Rogers decides to move to a small town, get a regular job and a regular room mate...

Word Count: 1832

Warnings: mentions of death. some language. some hanky panky (MILD exhibitionism?!??!). Like neck kissing, hip straddling. But not between Steve and reader... yet. Eventual warnings for possible PTSD and traumatic flashbacks. Smut. Oh boy I can’t believe I just wrote that this is going to be a wonderful journal.

Notes: Holy cow I’m actually posting this. This is my first time posting a fic so please be kind? I’m also open to constructive criticism though so yeah. How I’m posting a Steve Rogers fic before a Thor fic is beyond me but I guess ya gotta follow the spark? This literally is based off a dream so it should be interesting?! If I can actually finish it?! I have not seen Endgame (I’m not mentally prepared) but I have a general idea of how it goes and I’m writing things differently. For reasons. I hope you all enjoy! EDIT: I’m so mad at Tumblr I tried to add a tag through mobile and it DELETED THE WHOLE DANG POST FORMATTING AND ALL so here it is again.

Links: Chapter 2

You groaned as you rolled over and blearily felt around for your phone on the nightstand; the display lit up so bright it made your eyes squint in pain. As they finally adjusted to the screen and you saw the numbers 2:43, you felt a familiar anger boil up inside you. That anger spiked when you heard a few thumps and more giggling from the living room. This was the third time this week Steve had brought some random drunk girl home from the bar where he worked. He was a popular guy because he was great at what he did, good-looking too you had to admit. And he was Captain America. He knew he had these qualities though and he flaunted them. For most people, his cockiness was a turn on; for you, it was the exact opposite and made most of the time rooming with him a miserable thing. You rolled over and squeezed your eyes shut, desperately willing sleep to come. Your mind trailed off to when you first met Steve. After the defeat of Thanos and the death of so many, Tony in particular, the Avengers had dispersed; they remained in touch but they all had decided to lead normal lives. As normal as possible anyway.

Steve Rogers? Captain America? He decided to get a regular job at a regular bar in some regular town and move into some regular house. You knew he hurt. Who didn’t? Everyone had lost someone. You… You had lost your sister. She was the one who roomed with you before Steve. Some of her pictures were still on the mantle along with one of the Avengers together. You always smiled when you saw those pictures. The one with your sister was her in the snow, her skin flushed a bright red from the cold, her nose and eyes scrunched up as she laughed. That memory was so sweet, still fresh as if you had taken the picture yesterday. She had tripped and fallen face first in the snow. It was deep so it hadn’t hurt her. Instead she had flooded the air with her laughter. The two of you had ended up gasping for breath from hysterics. The one of the Avengers was similar although the focus of their laughter seemed to be Tony Stark’s frown. It wasn’t really a frown though, more as if he was trying to keep a smile off his face. Steve had never told you the story (he never really told you much about that time) but you guessed they were ribbing him for something. The love for each other was evident though. Steve seemed to be the most enthusiastic; his head was thrown back, eyes closed. He was holding his stomach and his golden hair was falling loosely in a wave. It made you smile every time you looked at those.

“Steeeevveee…” A whine came from the living room. Your efforts to go back to sleep were a no-go. All those girls he brought home were so… Not Steve. It made your blood run hot.

“That’s it,” you whispered angrily to no one in particular as you leapt from your bed and stalked down the hall. The was a furry rug running down the length of the floor; you weren’t exactly trying to move quietly. Still, you doubted Steve wouldn’t hear you, either way. At the last minute, something stopped you from rounding the corner. Really, what right did you have to tell him not to bring girls home? This was half his house. You had to be at work in three hours now though, a thought that made you somewhat desperate. You took a deep breath and slowly padded out into the living area.

There was Steve, sitting on the couch (the couch you sat on too sometimes for Christ’s sake). The girl was straddling his lap, her blonde curls loose around her shoulders. Her mini skirt was hiked up to her hips. His arms were at her back and he was kissing her neck; her hands were in his hair and she let out a small moan. You stood frozen in place.

They were completely absorbed in each other, completely oblivious to you standing there gawking. It was an impressive sight to see Steve in action if you were being completely honest with yourself. Then he opened his eyes. You’d looked him in the face before, knew he had pretty blues but this… This was different. They were stunning, intense. And focused on you as the girl he was holding let her head fall back on a sigh. He didn’t stop, just watched you watching him. It made the muscles in your stomach clench. What the hell? You stood straight, shook your head in an attempt to make the haziness leave your brain and cleared your throat. She jumped in his arms but didn’t make any move to get off his lap. She did a half turn to see who was there; you crossed your arms and tapped your foot.

“Look, I don’t wanna be rude and I don’t know if Steve told you but he doesn’t live alone. And I gotta get up for work in the morning. I mean, can you guys just be a little quieter, Steve?” You directed your gaze to him. He watched you lazily but… Your cheeks flushed hot when he kept watching you. Shit… “That’s all I need…” You trailed off awkwardly, frustrated with yourself. He finally looked away and back at her face.

“Gosh, doll, looks like our fun’s over. Maybe some other time?” He smirked, squeezing her hips. He continued smirking as she stared at him in disbelief.

“Look,” she finally said, mirroring your statement with sarcasm, “I don’t wanna be rude but I don’t know who this bitch thinks she is—” Your eyes widened when Steve didn’t even let her finish her sentence as he stood up abruptly, letting her fall indignantly to the cushion next to him.

“That bitch,” he said quietly, “pays half the rent. She’s my roommate. And I won’t have anyone disrespecting her.” Now it was her turn to widen her eyes; her mouth gaped open. Steve stood, imposing, one hand in the pocket of his blue jeans, the other arm extended to the door. The girl stood quickly and grabbed her bag from the coffee table. The door slammed as she left. You crossed your arms and tried to look everywhere but at Steve who still faced away from you.

“Sorry,” you mumbled. “I didn’t mean for that to happen. I just… I have to be there at, like, six—”

“It’s fine.” His shoulders and back flexed; you gulped when he turned around and studied your face. “She shouldn’t have said that.” God those blue eyes. He took a step forward and another when you didn’t back away. Finally, he grinned. “I think you made her jealous. I mean, who wouldn’t be jealous of you? You get to see America’s ass in person every day.” You rolled your eyes. Steve having access to the internet was all at once the worst and best thing. He was fascinated by memes and when it came to memes of himself… well, he could make you sit for hours showing you memes. “Play hooky with me tomorrow, let me make up for how she treated you.” You crossed your arms again and pursed your lips, shook your head.

“No-can-do, Steve. I’m one of the openers. I wouldn’t do that on such short notice.”

“I figured as much. I’ve never seen you call out. I mean, except that one time you were puking your guts out.” Steve smirked, you shuddered.

“Ugh, that was awful. I was so sick! Thank god you didn’t bring anyone here those nights.” You returned his smirk as Steve gave you an expression of mock surprise, throwing his hands up in surrender.

“I don’t bring that many girls home, okay? Besides, I have to drown out the bad memories somewhere.” There was an uncomfortable moment of silence.

“Steve—"

“Plus, you were so miserable. I didn’t want to bother you. I tried to stay scarce those days.” He’d crossed his arms again, and you had to force yourself to keep your eyes on his face instead of how good he looked in that worn white t-shirt of his. His words jarred a memory in you though from the last time you remembered being that sick.

You were fifteen. Your mom had to work the night shift at the hospital. She wasn’t particularly caring anyway. Y/Sister’s name was the one who found you in the bathroom in the middle of the night, laying on the cold tile floor holding your stomach. She had rubbed your back and held your hair back from your face and made sure you drank little bits of water to wash away the gross aftertaste.

“Ssshh,” she had whispered. “It’s all right, you’re okay.” She had helped you back to bed, tucked you in with a bucket on the floor. She had stayed there all night, waiting it out with you. It was the best feeling just knowing someone was there. She was always there for you, even when no one else was…

Tears sprang unbidden to your eyes and you bit your lip. Shit. Shit shit shit.

“I, uh, I gotta go to bed, okay? Um, sorry about tonight. Didn’t mean for it to go that way,” you said again. That quick he closed the space between you; he was so close you could smell the subtle aroma of his cologne, see the way his eyes searched yours. He reached up and brushed a thumb across your cheek, wiping away a tear you hadn’t even noticed falling.

“Please don’t apologize. Can I take you out after you get off?” You looked up at him (you definitely had to look up) and studied his face. He looked so tired. His eyes looked sad. How had you never noticed before? Maybe it was time you paid attention. A small nod.

“Yeah,” you whispered, even though you didn’t even know why you had to whisper. “I get off at 1. Should I meet you?” Steve smiled then. Golden boy. Apollo. The sun.

“Nah, I got this. I’ll pick you up.” Was he always a gentleman like this? A quick hitch of your breath as he leaned forward and spoke close to your ear “Good night, Y/N.” He stood up and slowly brushed passed you heading to the room at the other side of the hall where he saluted you with a grin as he went in and closed his door. He knew. He knew the effect he suddenly was having on you and he was loving it. If you were being honest, you didn’t mind that you were finally acknowledging it.

And now, somehow, you were going to hang out with Steve Rogers tomorrow. You slapped a hand over your mouth to stifle your disbelieving giggle. It felt good.

#inthorantine writes #steve rogers #steve rogers x reader #enemies to lovers #enemies to lovers trope #txt #inthorantine #and they were roommates

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dakotacrisis · 4 years

Text

Transferred (14)

The Class used: Remorse

It is super effective!

---

The next couple of days after Lila’s downfall were strangely normal. Outside of Marinette’s old classmates liking her social media posts again they weren’t interacting with her directly. According to Adrien and Alya, Lila had vanished from the school altogether after what went down. No one had heard from her and no one was looking to reach out to her. Served her right for everything she had done. If Marinette never saw Lila again it would be too soon.

“Thanks again for coming over to help with this,” Marinette told her friends.

Alya, Aurore, and Wayhem were all in Marinette’s room as she pieced together Kagami’s fundraiser dress. Kagami couldn’t make it over so Aurore was being used as a live model to see how it looked walking and sitting. Wayhem actually knew how to sew too so he was helping with a couple alterations and handing over a convenient pin or needle when needed. Then Alya was sitting on the chaise keeping the rest of them entertained with music, gossip, and memes.

“It was nothing.” Aurore said, “You’re sure it’s okay for me to wear this though? Isn’t it supposed to be tailored to Kagami?”

“It is but I need to see how it moves and hangs on a real person and you two have the same measurements. If she wasn’t at fencing practice I’d have her here but it is what it is.” Marinette shrugged.

“For the short notice it turned out pretty spectacular.” Wayhem praised, “Aurore, I want to make sure the hem is even. Can you do a slow turn?”

“Sure,”

“Ha, someone made the lady yelling at the cat meme with Ladybug and Chat Noir.” Alya said.

“Who’s the cat?” Aurore asked.

“Chat Noir. Why would the cat themed hero not be the cat in the format?”

“Diversity? Ladybug could be a cat if she wanted to be.” Aurore shrugged.

Marinette had to stifle a mad laugh. She had played Lady Noir once. That was plenty. Although she will admit the few photos of herself with Chat’s miraculous looked good. She really should wear black more often.

“I think we are done.” Wayhem stepped back. “Hem is even. Anything you notice that needs fixing, Marinette?”

“Let me see.” She paced around the dress tugging it here and there and making sure all the seams were neat. “Looks good. How does it feel? Too tight? Too loose?”

“It is perfect.” Aurore stepped off her tiny pedestal.

“Walk in it. I wanna see how it moves.” Marinette instructed. “Okay. Moves well. Looks good. I think we are done. You can go behind the divider and change. I need to grab the garment bag from the downstairs closet.”

Marinette had pulled the garment bag out of the closet when there was a knock on the front door. She set the bag down and went to see who it was. Maybe Kagami had managed to get off early and wanted to try on the dress.

The dozen of faces waiting outside her door were definitely not Kagami. It looked like all her old classmates had decided to pay a visit. She hadn’t directly talked to any of them since she transferred and they had only barely begun to try reaching out to her now. Suffice to say it felt very strange seeing them here at her house.

“Hi,” Marinette gripped the door handle tighter. “What uh...what are you guys doing here?”

“We--well we wanted to um--” Nino wrung his hat around in his hands.

“We came to apologize.” Alix blurted out.

“Oh” Marinette had thought this might happen. She wasn’t expecting everyone at once though.

“Yeah. We were pretty harsh when everything with Lila happened. It wasn’t right.” Mylene said.

“You were also pretty scary too.” Kim was silenced by Ivan subtly elbowing him in the ribs.

“To be perfectly honest our failure to recognize Lila’s deceit was nothing short of imbecilic. I should have known she was lying when she said you cheated during the gaming tournament. Your skills are far too refined to ever have to resort to cheat codes.” Max said.

“We were so mean and we’re really sorry about all of this.” Rose looked like she was close to breaking down in tears. “I didn’t--I didn’t think that--”

Juleka hugged Rose as she started to blubber.

“Marinette?” Alya came downstairs followed by Wayhem and Aurore. “Nino? Guys? What’s going on?”

“They’re here to apologize.” Marinette was trying not to have another breakdown.

The all at once relief of stress and anxiety had left Marinette rather sensitive. At random points it would just hit her all at once and she’d start crying or laughing or both. Yesterday Adrien gave her a hug and she broke down. So having all her old peers outside her door apologizing and asking forgiveness was definitely wearing on her sanity control.

“Uncool guys. You just can’t ambush someone like this! Even if it is well meaning.” Alya stepped out into the hallway and closed the door behind her. There was some muffled conversation before she opened the door again. “Now, what do we have to say to Marinette?”

“Sorry for coming over uninvited and without any notice.” Nino said. “We weren’t sure you would see us if we asked.”

“I won’t act like everything that happened didn’t hurt me. I thought we were all friends but when the time came you all took Lila’s side. Someone you barely knew. It was infuriating but even more disappointing that my word seemed to carry such little weight with all of you.”

“Marinette--”

“Let her finish.” Aurore glared at the others.

“I know the real culprit here is Lila. She’s the one that lied and sabotaged and drove me out of the school by turning everyone against me. I’ll never forgive her.” Marinette took a deep breath, “But I think I am ready to start forgiving you.”

The class perked up at that.

“That is great to here. There is one other thing we came to ask though.” Nathaneal said.

“Which is?”

“We would love it if you transferred back to Dupont. We miss you and want our sweet classmate back.” Rose said.

“What did I just tell you guys about putting pressure on an unassuming person?” Alya groaned. She turned to Marinette, “I am so sorry about them. You don’t have to answer.”

“I think it is a fair question.” Wayhem shrugged. “Now that Lila’s been exposed, would you transfer back?”

“I know we weren’t in the same class but it would be nice seeing you around school again.” Aurore smiled.

“Everyone, please,” Marinette backed up, “I appreciate you coming over to apologize and asking me to come back. But the fact of the matter is that I am not coming back to Dupont. It isn’t anything against all of you but I love where I am right now. I’ve made new friends and have finally caught up with the rest of the class at my new school.”

“Also,” Marinette sighed, “Even though all of you know the truth about Lila I can’t be around her. I not only want to keep as far from her as I can but I feel like I need to stay way from her. Especially now that she’s been outed as the liar she is I can only see her getting more hostile.”

“No one has heard from her in days though. She might have transferred schools or been expelled.” Alix insisted. “If she did try anything we’d be there for you this time. You wouldn’t need to worry.”

“I still can’t take that chance. I left because it was the best thing for me at the time. Now I’m not returning because this is still the case. I hope you can accept that.”

Everyone looked disappointed but nodded.

“Thanks for hearing us out.” Mylene said.

“Alright, off with the lot of you.” Alya shooed them out. “Nino, you’re coming with me. Marinette, I’ll text you later. Bye!”

“Bye!” Marinette watched them file back down the steps. When she heard the downstairs door close she dropped to new knees. She had felt like keeling over the second she opened the door and saw all them waiting for her.

“Whoa, are you okay?” Wayhem helped her up.

“I need a moment.” Marinette trudged over to the couch. “My head hurts.”

“For what it’s worth, I think you handled that very well.”

“Thanks.” Marinette took a few more calming breaths. “Oh wait, the dress,”

“I got it.” Wayhem grabbed the garment bag. “You chill for a minute.”

“Thank you, Wayhem.” Marinette leaned against Aurore, “Why does life have to be so darn complicated?”

“If it were simple it would be boring.” Aurore patted her back. “The worst is over now.”

I doubt that. Marinette thought. More hard times and horrible people would come but for right now she could breathe and know everything was okay. If only for a little bit.

Wayhem and Aurore hung out for a bit longer before they had to go. Marinette checked on Kagami’s dress a final time before texting her that it was all done. Unfortunately Kagami’s schedule didn’t mean they’d get a chance to do a final fitting before the fundraiser but Marinette was going to come over extra early the evening of to help her get ready. Hopefully if anything needed altered she’d have enough time to do it.

The days flew by and soon it was the night of the fundraiser. Marinette took the dress and made her way to Kagami’s house. Kagami answered the door and pulled her inside.

“Someone is excited,” Marinette laughed, “here is your dress,” She handed over the garment bag.

“What isn’t there to be excited about?” Kagami was bouncing as she took the dress. It was cute seeing her getting all giddy about it. “I’ve been looking forward to tonight all week.”

“And I can’t wait to see the outfit all put together. Go try it on!” Marinette ushered her into the bedroom. She waited nervously as Kagami put on the dress.

“MARINETTE!” Kagami shrieked. She’s seen the alteration.

Kagami stepped back out of the room in the dress. It looked fantastic. A fitted royal blue dress with an off the shoulder neckline. “What is this?” she pointed at the small slit Marinette had put in the dress. Nothing too much but it gave a cheeky peek of thigh when she walked.

“I know that you didn’t want anything short but you deserve to show off your legs a little. This is a great compromise.”

“I don’t know…” she tugged at the slit.

“If it bothers you that much I did bring my supplies to close it but you look amazing. You look hot.”

“Really?”

“Yes! Go put on the rest of the outfit. We’re on a deadline!” Marinette helped her tie on her strappy black heels while Kagami put her earrings in. Marinette carefully did her makeup so it wasn’t over the top but highlighted her big brown eyes and made her lips very kissable. (Side note to review sexuality later.)

“Alright,” Marinette put her in front of the mirror, “What do you think?”

“Wow,” Kagami couldn’t stop smiling, “I look--I don’t even know!”

“You look spectacular. You are going to turn heads this evening, my dear Kagami.” Marinette stood behind her smoothing out her hair and picking tiny bits off lint off her dress.

“Thank you, Marinette.” Kagami smiled at her. “It means so much. Not just the dress but being encouraging about Adrien. But more importantly this friendship between you and me. You are a great girl and I’m glad that I’ve gotten to know you better.”

“Me too,” She rested her head against Kagami’s shoulder, “I don’t think I ever thought I would be hyping up my romantic rival for a date with my crush. But, it’s you and I kinda love you. You’re great and no matter who Adrien ends up with, whether it be you, me, or someone else, I’m glad we have this friendship.”

“Dang it, Marinette,” Kagami fanned her face, “Is this mascara waterproof?”

“Don’t cry!” Marinette grabbed her a tissue, “No tears!”

“Stop being so sweet then!” Kagami dabbed at the corner of her eyes.

After they had both calmed down Marinette checked the time. They had to get going if Kagami was gonna be on time. They walked out to the limo. “Hope you have fun,”

“Okay, so I have a small confession,” Kagami was fidgeting. Fidgeting!

“What?” Marinette eyed her suspiciously.

“You’re coming to this fundraiser too.”

“Say what?”

“Come on, we don’t have a whole lot of time.”

---

(1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) (11) (12) (13) (15)

---

@northernbluetongue @ladylb @immatureidiot101 @lady-flora-of-slytherin @zazzlejazzle @shamefullove @heredemaquam @kristycocopops @schrodingers25 @sublimemagazinestarlight @crazylittlemunchkin @daydream-wannabewriter @trainflavor @never-neverland

#miraculous ladybug #marinette dupain cheng #alya cesaire #aurore boréale #wayhem #kagami tsurugi #salt fic #transfer au #writing

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daesungindistress · 5 years

Text

A message I received today (she wanted it published):

“Hi! I was browsing the bigbang tag here when i found your account and I had a pretty interesting evening reading your blog! Imagine my surprise when I found out you were the RcA of carnivores...... i was surprised then not at all because I remember writing you a monstrously long review then you replying me with an even longer reply XD In that spirit, I shall give my 2 cents

i saw your various posts about seungrigate, in particular the hyungline's prophecizing abilities. To preface this, I don't support Seungri and I'm not a OT5 stan but I think these videos, while chilling to watch in the aftermath of seungrigate events, have become overblown in some sort of Bigbang history revisionism

The truth is, if GD really thought Seungri was going to go to jail, or had any side illegal activities, he definitely wouldn't have aired his views in front of cameras, in a DVD recording available to everyone. Similar reasoning to every other incidence of 'prophecizing' the hyungs did. If the hyungs really suspected Seungri's club was out drugging and raping women, the stupidest way to have resolved it would have been to take it to TV. Not to mention how suddenly chilling it is if the hyungs actually did know and were complicit in the crimes, which I feel like a lot of these prophecy video retweeters don't consider.

At best, they thought (and I too thought at that time) that Seungri was maybe making bad money decisions, Lee Sangmin style.

I think its comforting to think the signs were always there, that the hyungs warned him but he didn't listen, that their relationships were fraught because of the whole Seungri never eats with us memes, that he was never a good person and he showed it all along but the fans shoved their head under the sand. But to characterize him as a 2D villain so that we don't have to struggle to reconcile the person we idolized before, and the crimes he's accused of now is only a disservice to us.

Seungri wasn't the only one who skipped out on dinners- TOP had that habit before Seungri, and i think it was even mentioned in Healing Camp (the whole gold medal thing). Seungri did like and love his hyungs unless he was the world's best actor. He talked Jiyong through things in 2009 when Jiyong read the comments asking him to comment suicide and cried on phone. He cried on Jiyong for 20 minutes in 2012 because he was disappointed in a hyung he idolized letting him down with the marijuana scandal. He texted Daesung within one minute on that Japanese show when he said he needed help, and cheered him up when he was dying of nerves before his concert. He saved Todae from getting hit by fireworks in Malaysia by physically hauling them away. When TOP was represented by a tower in variety shows, Seungri blatantly mentioned his name in Radio Star when everyone pretended he didn't exist. The kid we knew existed. It's just that there was another, more insidious side to him too. This is NOT a defence of Seungri, I just think there's been a lot of revisionism going on lately, about his character and his relationship with the band. Seungri is a shitty criminal, but sadly a criminal who did love his hyungs and fans in some way. Not everything that happened in the last 12 years is fake.

i remember feeling very grateful when Seungri showed up in Act 3 Motte and hugged Jiyong and Jiyong smiled for the first time in that whole damn tour. Jiyong loved that boy, and mentioned he was family to him so many times. Jiyong was the most attached to Seungri IMO (I guess since they were roommates back then and all), but Taeyang called him up in the military when he only had one call, forgoing his own damn wife. I think, the truly heartbreaking thing about this, is that Seungri was loved by his hyungs, and he did love his hyungs too.”

***

Do you know how many asks it would have taken to get this message to me had you gone that route after all? LOL, alright, here’s my reply (some of which will be behind a cut to save y’all’s dashboards). I’ll quote the parts I want to address in italics.

“The truth is, if GD really thought Seungri was going to go to jail, or had any side illegal activities, he definitely wouldn't have aired his views in front of cameras, in a DVD recording available to everyone.”

That's what we all thought too... and that's why we didn't take any of it seriously and casually wrote most of it off as jokes, bullying, teasing, playing, etc. And while I'm sure it was that in a way, at least in part, you know what they say: there's a grain of truth in every joke (or "a little bit of truth behind every 'just kidding'").

Many fans are also taking this as a sign of how serious the others were becoming in their warnings to him, as if they felt it was the only way to get through to him. I'm sure they had private conversations off-camera, but if they were williing to do it publicly? On national TV? (Radio Star, for example.) That appears to say something about the weight of their concerns and their attempts to reach him. (Also keep in mind that they've said they rarely saw him outside of band activities, that he was always running off as soon as events with them had ended, so who knows... maybe they felt that on camera was the only real chance they had to catch him and address him in person. Maybe they felt like it was the only way he would listen. So many maybes.)

Another thing: TOP's rather astute comments about Seungri's friends (that they seemed like bad people, that they were using him, that they weren't his true friends but were only attracted to his fame, etc)... I personally would not have said those things where the public could hear them were I in his position. There's nothing joking about it, nothing at all. He was very direct in his delivery and it was not something that could be laughed away even if you tried.

“If the hyungs really suspected Seungri's club was out drugging and raping women, the stupidest way to have resolved it would have been to take it to TV. Not to mention how suddenly chilling it is if the hyungs actually did know and were complicit in the crimes, which I feel like a lot of these prophecy video retweeters don't consider.”

Okay everyone, listen up. This is important. In all these videos being referenced by fans in recent days, it's not possible that the hyungs were hinting at the drugging and assault that occurred at "Seungri's club" (I still hesitate to call it that) because Burning Sun did not yet exist when these things were being said. The club Burning Sun opened in February 2018. The last time BB were together as a group (as four -- GD, YB, Daesung, Seungri) was during their Japan Dome Tour in December 2017. And TOP? January 2017.

(read the rest behind the cut)

Further information: GD enlisted in late February 2018 and YB & Daesung enlisted less then a month later in mid March. Burning Sun opened in February 2018 and closed a year later in February 2019 during Burning Sun gate. The videos floating around in which the hyungs appear to warn Seungri come primarily from their 2017 Welcoming Collection (filmed in late 2016), Run BIGBANG Scout (shot in summer 2016), and from various concerts and fanmeetings throughout 2016-2017.

It is true that people do need to be very cautious when speculating about just how much the others knew about what Seungri & Co got up to, seeing as how, when it comes to this type of crime, awareness of the crime can be quite damning in and of itself. But once you take these dates into account, I think the others should be fairly safe from that kind of dangerous speculation. The question then becomes, how much did they know about what Seungri & Co got up to in their own time?

That I’m not overly worried about. They made it quite clear on several occasions that they hated his friends. Why would they have had any involvement with them? And it’s difficult to imagine Seungri inviting them in, so to speak, knowing how they were always scolding him for one thing or another. The way I see it, he found his own flock and kept a tight formation. Birds of a feather and all that.

“At best, they thought (and I too thought at that time) that Seungri was maybe making bad money decisions, Lee Sangmin style.”

This is the assumption most fans seem to be going with. Additionally, they may have had some ideas about his treatment of women as well, especially taking into account his 2012 sex scandal with a Japanese woman in which he allegedly choked her during sex, never kissed her, and threw a towel at her when he was done (and after which Youngbae and Daesung moved in with him, evidently to keep an eye on him and help set him straight. I don’t know how much truth there is to this, but I’ve read that he seemed proud in the scandal’s aftermath because hey, people were finally viewing him as an adult. Talk about embracing one's bad boy image.)

On that note: if he was in fact proud of himself for getting caught up in a sex scandal back then because he felt like it made him more of a man, then what must he be feeling now? Bearing in mind the influence of his less-than-reputable friend group of the last few years? He's currently under suspicion of hooking up with prostitutes and offering them to his investors to grow his business, among other things. The public is calling him a pimp (not totally accurate but ok). His conduct lately is not that of a person who feels he's done anything wrong. He might even feel a little, well... pleased with himself. Hence that small but self-satisfied grin he's been wearing everywhere lately.

Hmm... Just some thoughts.

“But to characterize him as a 2D villain so that we don't have to struggle to reconcile the person we idolized before, and the crimes he's accused of now is only a disservice to us.”

I’m sorry you see it this way because that's not my intent at all. My goal is not to paint him as a villain but to simply show that the signs of trouble were there and to suggest that perhaps we shouldn't be as surprised as we are about recent revelations. That this isn't really coming at us -- or at the rest of BB for that matter -- completely out of the blue. I don't know about you, but I find that comforting. Understanding what went wrong and when helps me to better come to terms with what's happened here, and I've been hearing from quite a few others lately who say it's helped them too. It also reinforces my confidence in OT4′s ability to carry on, because if they expected him to leave them in the near future, it stands to reason that they had been mentally and emotionally readying themselves for it. We the fans are hurting enough; the last thing I want right now is for the members of BB to be hurting too.

I'm also hope my readers don’t think I’m suggesting that Seungri was never a good person or never did anything good for anyone. That’s not it at all. Nothing is ever that black and white. I won’t forget them or try to erase them, it’s just that right now I'm not very interested in reflecting on the “good times”... and I think most would agree. Those acts of kindness you're referencing in 2009, 2011, 2012, 2013... you might have noticed that I've been focusing on conversations between the guys that took place in 2016 onward. Between MADE era and the present day. Alive era, Tonight era... I'm not interested in examining those years, because I'm concentrating on the period of time after Seungri met his new circle of friends (Jung Joonyoung, Choi Jonghoon, Yoo In Suk, etc) and began spending more time with them than with the rest of BB. I'm certainly not implying that Seungri was always this way, but I do believe he had the potential to become it given the right -- or should I say wrong influences. And he found those influences. Or should I say they found him?

Now, this is just speculation, but BB's popularity exploded immensely during Alive in 2012. After that the members of BB went their separate ways for a time to work on solo projects. They came together periodically for YG family tours, I know that much, but it wasn't until MADE in 2015 that they were promoting as five again. It can probably be assumed that it was during that absence when Seungri ~fell in with this bad crowd~ (I hate to use that phrase because it seems to absolve him of responsibility for his actions, but let’s just go with it for a sec). I suspect the sharp rise in fame went to his head and he became... let’s just say susceptible.

(If there are any Seungri stans still here, feel free to correct me if I'm wrong about the timeline or chime in with additional info. My knowledge of what the members were up to between Alive and MADE is pretty murky, seeing as I wasn't "there" for it in real time.)

“When TOP was represented by a tower in variety shows, Seungri blatantly mentioned his name in Radio Star when everyone pretended he didn't exist.”

Someone brought this up in an ask that I haven't answered (sorry anon!). While it's entirely possible that he did this out of the goodness of his own heart, it's also possible that he did it because he knew it was what the fans wanted... and Seungri is nothing if not good at giving people what they want. It might not have had anything to do with TOP's feelings at all. I also wonder if YB calling him while in the military may have been done more out of concern than affection -- i.e., checking in on him to make sure he stayed out of trouble.

...and that's if Seungri's story is even to be believed, i.e., "He called me instead of his wife, can you believe it?!" Seungri is not above using the others to draw eyes to himself and prop up his own popularity (as he did when he name dropped GD constantly during his Great Seungri promotions), and given the others' comments about him exaggerating and even flat-out making up stories that haven’t a shred of truth for attention... just saying I wouldn't put anything past him at this point.

“The kid we knew existed. It's just that there was another, more insidious side to him too.”

That's really all it boils down to. Although I don't much care for calling him a "kid" anymore. I know he likes to play up the cute maknae role and all when it benefits him, but it's never sat well with me because, well... dude's a grown man, and calling him "kid" in light of recent events feels very wrong. That "kid" image is long gone, and I say good riddance. (For the record, I don't much like it when the others go all aegyo on each other either; with them now in their late 20s - early 30s, I have to say it's gotten a little weird.)

“Seungri is a shitty criminal, but sadly a criminal who did love his hyungs and fans in some way. Not everything that happened in the last 12 years is fake. ... I think, the truly heartbreaking thing about this, is that Seungri was loved by his hyungs, and he did love his hyungs too.”

I believe in... their love for him to varying degrees. Some were closer than others, of course. This is why, in a previous post, I said that I won't be surprised if some of them decide to stay in Seungri's life as a positive influence behind the scenes. However, at the same time, I won't be surprised if they choose not to. The thing is, you can still remain friends with someone but recognize that the two of you just don't work well together anymore in a, well, work environment. The bonds of friendship are important, yes, but as I think we've seen lately... it isn't everything.

With what we know now, I believe that the tension we've seen building between Seungri and the other members over the last few years was rooted in Seungri losing his passion for music as his obsession with wealth and power took over. Greed got the best of him. And I’m sure he was frustrated; there were things he wanted from Big Bang that Big Bang could not give him.

Although his hyungs surely still cared for him, more or less, I can see why in the last few years they may have been uncomfortable continuing to work with him if they felt that he was staying for all the wrong reasons. If you're going to be part of a group of artists like this one, it helps with group morale, to be confident in the knowledge that you all share a common interest and are working toward a common goal. If the others' goal was in expressing themselves through their craft -- music and dance -- and connecting with the fans through their work, while Seungri saw it primarily as a means to an end (i.e., "It's just a paycheck") then yeah. I'd have found myself getting pretty irritated with him too.

In the end, you can care for someone and still distance yourself from them, for an abundance of reasons. I think many of us have been there with loved ones ourselves... and I believe that's what we're going to see happen in the coming months when the others come back. Hell, it's been happening for years right under our noses; the difference now is they don't have to try to hide it anymore.

#ask #seungri #bigbang #burning sun #my post #do you guys know how many fics I could have churned out by now if I was putting my writing energy into that instead of these asks #lol #jk it's not that easy #k time to hit the hay

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todaysbiggesthits · 4 years

Text

The Exam

Best Music Moment of 2019

BC: Three straight hours of this

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in my Chapman Ryder Cup match with Code -The Robert M. Chennault Playlist in my Ryder Cup match with Laser -Vampire Weekend's "M79" with Parks and Rec theme interlude in Pawnee Peytonville with my babe -Late night music game with JD and Chaps this Fall -My kids competing for best air guitar solo to Daft Punk's "Digital Love" -The Stones soundtracking Raceday morning with Counterfeit Kenny and the Kennel Boys

Codem: -Picking up the keys after closing on #our house and listening to Arden's dreams for the pad while listening to the songs that brought us together in the first place. -Perched in the balcony of Park West watching Chromatics live and in person. -The Chapman format playlist that Brendon and I put together. It was just one song on repeat. Xtal - Aphex Twin -Plugging in my klipsch's for the first time in the new house to listen to elliott smith on the day of his death. the sound of his discography wafting throughout the whole house was a true delight.

Bronco: My 6-year-old discovering Green Day. My 9-year-old discovering Metallica. Both discoveries have awakened something in them that is hilarious and awesome to behold. And seeing Tool was pretty flaming awesome.

JD: March: Realizing I’d never heard this Stones song, nodding along to the opening riff, and exploding into my biggest laugh of the year at the first line.

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June: The Joni Mitchell performance in the Rolling Thunder Review documentary on Netflix. June: Catching the Thom Yorke Anima short film at the IMAX theater on the Upper West Side. July: Code and I getting a perfect 99 score on the greatest rendition of “Emotional Rescue” karaoke you’ll ever see. October: Playing the music game WAY too deep into the night with BC and Chap (look for the next day’s hangover on my worst moments list).

Chap: Patrick Stickles singing "I'm sorry dad no I'm not making this up" to his dad in the audience.

Nasty: Listening to music at BOB. Nothing but jams that whole weekend. Driving in with Laser - GOOGLE MUSIC JAMS. Trip to the casino - JAMS. Hanging out on the deck - JAMS. Driving to the course with Blazer Black - Fuck Buttons - Sweet Love for Planet Earth aka JAMS. In the cart with Code - JAMS. Driving Chappy and Sfreddo to the rental car - JAMS (but quietly).

Larse: Greta Thunberg speech dubbed to metal

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Best Shows Seent in 2019

Nasty: The Killers @ Summerfest. Hot Fuss will always be an all-time favorite album and Mr. Brightside is the best pop song of our lifetime, IMO. Also, my wife loves them which is about the only band in middle of the venn diagram.

Larse: The Lonely Island at Summerfest

BC: Dead & Company

JD: 1. The Rapture at Music Hall of Williamsburg 2. Viagra Boys at Bowery Ballroom 3. The Strokes and Parkay Boys at the All Points East fest in London with drunk lads screaming along to the guitar parts 4. B Boys at Union Pool 5. Titus Andronicus at Bowery Ballroom 6. Avey Tare at Market Hotel 7. Tame Impala at MSG 8. Weeping Icon at Elsewhere 9. Priests at Elsewhere

Code: interpol - chicago theater illuminati hotties - hideout it looks sad - subT downstairs robyn - riviera steve malkmus - art institute eleventh dream day - hideout colleen green - sleeping village swearin' - lincoln hall surf curse - subT shura - the bottle

Chap: TA was the only show I saw. It was great!

Bronco: All of them. They were each great in their own way. Aside from Tool I was able to interact with the band members at each of the shows. One I didn't have a ticket for and scored one at the door. One was in the tiniest venue I've seen a show at. One had a surprisingly entertaining opening act. And Tool surprised me with how much I enjoyed an arena show despite being so far away I couldn't see the facial features of the band members. And there was SOOOOOOO much weed being smoked in the Garden that night. And I was with a few good buddies. And I was able to sell my fourth ticket for twice what I paid, simulatenously covering me and my fourth friend who had to bail because his life sucks because his wife sucks.

Confession of 2019

Nasty: I consume more music at my cushy, suburban OrangeTheory workout classes than in my own free time. S/O to Coach Vanessa for having some Girl Talk on her playlists.

Codem: i had more fun listening to stuff that i already knew about than stuff that was coming out.

BC: I saw a Yacht Rock cover band and didn't hate it -I succumbed to social pressure and saw DMB -I didn't realize until the last minute that my favorite album was released in 2018 (Wild Nothing). Removing it greatly reduced my loyalty to my list.

Bronco: I'm losing my edge. I enjoyed way more lady singer bands this year than in any other year.

Chap: Couldn't get my shit together on the tracks list so just posted a random playlist

Larse: Not really a confession but more of a TIL (today I learned), but Raphael Saadiq was an original member of Tony! Toni! Tone!

Biggest Disappointment of 2019

Bin: The National @ Summerfest. From the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel "the frontman was completely detached, even confessing at one point that he was excited to get back home to his family. The result was an incredibly depressing show — which, given the band's dour songs, is really saying something." ... Huge Bummer.

BC: Didn't see nearly enough shows with nearly enough of yous

Chap: Sturgill Simpson... unlistenable!

Bronco: Baroness.

Laser: Modest Mouse opening for The Black Keys

Code: i was really messed up by dave berman's passing. i had tickets to see him play at the end of august. it was going to be my first catching him live and in concert. i had waited for this moment since i picked up american water back in 2003. two weeks before he was supposed to come through town, he up and died. also, much less of a bummer, the chromatics show in miami that Arden and i were going to attend got canceled two days before the show.

Most Overrated of 2019

Nasty: Kanye's shoes

Chap: LEGACY! LEGACY! – Jamila Woods seems to have been highly regarded? Not my thing

BC: FKA Twigs

Bronco: Baroness.

JD: Big Thief

Code: cancel culture

Larse: Mayor Pete

Make it Stop 2019

Chap: In my house, the Nutcracker Suite. It's great, until the 300th time that day.

Nasty: Cage the Elephant (but children, instead of elephant, and in real life, not the band)

BC: Lizzo

Code: lizzo

JD: Memes

Larse: Trump

Bronco: News

Biggest TBH Regret of 2019

Chap: Can't seem to get to more than one show per year; Jessica Pratt in a church by my old place

JD: Missin’ dat Pratt yet Nick!

BC: Should've listened to the Kanye album. Should've spent more time with the Deerhunter record.

Rotty: Skipping CHVRCHES at Summerfest

Code: another year with no fog party

Nasty: Not going to Indy 500. lol jk.

Bronco: I didn't buy tickets to a few shows I would've liked to have seen. One of them I went to the venue and didn't get in. That bummed me out, but I crossed the street and had a few beers by myself for good measure, so it wasn't a total loss.

Detective Murtaugh of 2019

JD: Everything.

Bronco: Shows that don't start until 10pm. That Girl Band show nearly wrecked me.

Chap: How much I loved Bruce Springsteen's adult contemporary western-themed old-man album.

BC: The ten seconds I lasted with 1000 GECS

Nasty: For the life of me - I cannot figure out how to operate the "play next" queue on these apps.

Laser: Lizzo at Summerfest - lot of younglings running around; people were racist towards Lizzo's security guards, she vowed not to come back to MKE, one of the most segregated cities in America :(

Resolution for 2019 Status

Laser: — How It Went: Who can even remember this shit...I'm sure it was that I'd do better at keeping track or listen to more shit people suggest and I'm sure I failed.

BC: Listen to one new album a week; reboot the Classic Album Review Club How It Went: Noooot toooo gooooood

Code: catch ovlov, pictureplane, washer, chromatics, EMA and colleen green live this year. How It Went: i saw chromatics and colleen green. last i checked .400 gets you into cooperstown.

JD: Greater consciousness of how I’m using my attention - an ineffectual and meaningless protest of the ways the world is burning down in pursuit of it. How It Went: Not bad! I especially nailed the “ineffectual and meaningless” part.

Chap: Learn Piano; Guilt Joe Dons into finally inviting me to a concert. How It Went: Learned some piano but got to busy for it... Couldn't guilt JD to invite me anywhere but I DID invite him to a show! The same one I went to! With him!

Bronco: Read more 'classic’ books. I didn’t read many of them, even in school (especially in school? Never could read a book I was told to read). But I’m leaning in the sci-fi direction of 'classics’. I just read Dune this summer, and wrapped up Fahrenheit 451 the other day. I’m feeling an unexplained need to beef up my nerd credentials and this seems the way to accomplish it. How It Went: Nope. Fell back in to zombie-apocalypse genre series that I've been reading for a while. But I am currently reading arch-nerd Neal Stephenson's "Fall; or, Dodge in Hell". It's almost 900 pages, I feel like I've been reading for months now, and because I'm a stupidly slow reader, I read only before going to bed, and can only make it 10 minutes before falling asleep and hitting myself in the face with my phone, I'm only 25% of the way through. But man is it painting a creepy yet eerily plausible scene of the near future. Guy just knows how to write.

Nasty: Hope last year I was smart enough to leave this blank. (editor’s note: [removes shoes, pets cat, puts on slippers, retires to favorite easy chair, sips martini, slowly pulls reading glasses out of cardigan pocket, dusts them off, loads todaysbiggesthits.tumblr.com, scrolls to ‘Resolution for 2019’] “Nasty: I’m sticking with it - get to NY for a show with JD.”)

Resolution for 2020

BC: See Phish in 2020

Codem: i'm making it easier this year. catch ovlov, washer, EMA and colleen green live this year. bonus points: see dom's much anticipated return to the stage.

Bronco: Build a vinyl collection. I know I dumped on Brendon for suggesting he press copies of Carpet Affair, but my kid's getting way into music and listening to it on his own (via Alexa in my bedroom which is super fucking annoying), so we're getting him his own record player and I think it's going to be a cool activity to go record store diving for whatever classics we can scrounge up.

JD: Get to more shows. Take more aimless strolls spinning tunes.

Bin: Send an email about music on the TBH! thread.

Larse: None

Chap: Eh I'm cool

Most Anticipated of 2020

Code: my man dom said that he is coming back to the world this year. i have to believe that he'll keep his word. i'm thinking 2020 is going to be the year for chromatics' Tommy.

Chap: TWOD, Perfume Genius, Jason Isbell

BC: Huey Lewis and the News, Tame Impala, Run the Jewels

Bronco: Kvelertak and Mastodon, maybe some surprise extra Tool material?

JD: Working Men’s Club

Nasty: Spotify getting Jay-Z's catalog back.

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larriefails · 5 years

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First off, I’m not a rad nor a larrie, I’m a louie who hates both. I was just commenting on that because I’ve been in the fandom since 2013 and the de facto leader comment not only came from the boys but also during a billboard interview. In the billboard interview, they highlighted how Louis was the one taking the business calls and talking to their team about certain things. Also it’s not completely impossible to believe that once the 1d train ran out the big producers/names didn’t care to +

Work with him, because he was no “harry styles” liam is the same he even said that Simon didn’t want him on his label as a solo artist despite him having a great rapport with him. But there were other times louis’ business contacts were brought to light such as when he went to the Brits in 2016 and a reporter commented on how he was constantly on his feet to greet big name record executives and businessmen. He has the connects in the business that’s all I was trying to state.

Look, 99% of the time when I reply to an anon “you sound like a conspiracy theorist” it’s not because I think they believe in Larrie or because they’re rads, it’s because they fucking reason like conspiracy theorists

And your reasoning here is just… conspiracy theory mess. I don’t care which parts of it you believe or not, I don’t care what your personal feelings on these specific sets of conspiracy theories are. It doesn’t matter, the point is that you’re reasoning like a conspiracy theorist

I was gonna put this in a separate post, but I think it fits here very well (I might still make a separate post about it who knows)

A few days ago, I saw this video on twitter of a woman talking about her own death like it was nothing in a very matter of factly way, wearing a wig and using a very funny tone. Someone in the replies linked to her IG page so I went to look at it, and when I saw comments telling her “thank you for accepting my follow request” I realized she was usually on private and I’d just been very lucky to find her profile to be open, so I followed her just in case with the intention of watching her funny videos later

Since she was a new follow she continuously appeared on my recent IG feed and I soon realized how relevant what she was saying was to my interests

This is the woman

One day she posted this, and my alarms went off

Let me clarify that I don’t care if she’s a professor or a therapist or not, I followed her because I thought she was funny and that she’d go on private soon, this was all a complete surprise to me. The DM rang close to home to me, seeing as I’ve read Larries for a while now, it was all too familiar, her reply was too

Then she posted this

Once again, I said it before and you can read it here X it doesn’t matter if she’s a professor or not, if their suspicions are real or not, if she’s lying or not, because going through UCLA’s professor roll call is a step too far, and confronting her about it, even more so. And the way she presents it.. she’s right. She just linked the website, she never claimed to work there. If you go to her page, she’s very careful with the information she provides, so the people that want to prove she’s lying have very limited resources. They go with the preconception that she’s lying so they try to find ways to prove their preconception

You have the preconception that Louis was the de facto leader of 1D, so you’re working your way backwards to prove it. You’re looking at bits and pieces of interviews that will prove your theory right, but that’s just not what reality is

“The de facto leader comment not only came from the boys” .. no it didn’t, though? They didn’t say this. Do you know where the “the boys say Louis is the leader” comments come from? Stuff like this

Context for that interview? The Hot Desk, August 2011 X

One Direction had exactly ZERO songs out, this interview was recorded before they even released WMYB. All 5 of them had written on 3 songs of their first album that would come out in November. Savan Kotecha was still running the show. Louis was still 19 and he hadn’t been in show business for a year. How much of a leader that conducted business meetings do you think he was? I’m not gonna watch the entire interview to see the context, but this is not Zayn saying Louis was the de facto leader, this is Zayn kidding

What to even say about this, which is from the video diaries in X Factor?

Or this?

What? No, no they’re not, like, they’re just not, they’re standing in a circle and looking forward

This is just ridiculous

Does the person that created this gif set not realize that this is the performance where Louis doesn’t sing at all? It’s Torn at judges’ houses. It’s infamous for the fact that only Liam Harry and Zayn sang. This is all for dramatic effect because X Factor was a reality show

Louis liking motivation chants means he’s the leader? That he goes to business meetings? I’m so confused

That’s not because “he’s the leader” that’s because he’s the class clown

If accepting an award means he’s the leader then I guess this meme fits 1D very well

They all accepted awards, Christ

Anyway….

And that’s an entire gif set that was solely engineered to show that Louis was the leader and that “the boys said so”…. but they actually didn’t? The only two times it comes up they answer jokingly and it’s before Louis could do anything remotely leader like. But that gif set is so popular, created by a Larrie but that spilled out to the general fandom enough that I saw it on my dash reblogged by non CT blogs X

And it created this notion among some people, especially those who have Louis as their fave, that the other members of 1D had in fact said that Louis was the de facto leader, when they didn’t. It’s conspiracy talk, scouring through hundreds of MILLIONS of milliseconds of footage to pick 9 of them and put them in a gif set to prove a point they’d already decided on

There are also three news articles linked (copying and pasting directly from the source, sorry for the weird formatting idk how to take it off)

1: That’s the number of hotel rooms in Mexico City used for dance rehearsals. The guys locked down a room for three hours. Louis took control of the rehearsals and even helped conceptualize some of the routine.

That’sabout 1D learning the choreography for Best Song Ever

How exactly does it prove that Louis is the de facto leader for him to take over 1 dance rehearsal when everyone in 1D had confessed they couldn’t dance a million times at that point? Louis had some musical theater experience, so that’s that..

Harry: Louis is still loud and mischievous - he likes to test the boundaries. He’s quite outspoken. You need someone like that, because he’s great at standing up for us as a band.

That’s perhaps the most “leader like” comment any of them have ever made about Louis, and it’s not really about him being a leader once you put it by itself instead of surrounding it by “look at all the times they said he was the leader,” right? It’s just more of a testament about the fact that Louis was louder than the rest, which we already knew. If someone had asked me six months into my journey in the fandom who I thought was the loudest in band meetings I would’ve said Louis. That doesn’t mean he’s the leader. A leader has SO many more characteristics than being loud and outspoken. In fact, a lot of leaders aren’t loud or outspoken at all

The last link they put is once again, what How I Met Your Mother explained as the cheerleader effect X which taken away from the time period sounds quite misogynistic but let’s not dwell on that. Basically, it’s when a group of women appear hot when they’re all together but not individually. When you have the gif set all together, it looks like “wow, these are hot arguments as to why EVERYONE thought Louis was the leader,” but look at them individually, see their context and they’re not as hot now, are they? Especially when you realize, once again, that these are very very small morsels of time taken from very very large portions. That’s how Larries operate

Several people in your management and inner circle have described you to me as the unofficial businessman or leader of the group. Is that a fair assessment? I’ve sometimes felt like that, but to be honest most of the time I’m the immature one who needs to be told to get focused. I’m a bit of a perfectionist so I have to be kind of be on board with every minor detail and [I’m] quite opinionated.

And that last link is also the Billboard interview you mention in your ask. Do you know when it’s from? December 2012. One Direction had just released Take Me Home, their second album, which according to the interview that Larries love the most to base their sabotage conspiracies, didn’t very much involve 1D’s input at all

Savan Kotecha: I think by album 3 (Midnight Memories), yeah, not all of them, there was definitely one or two-one especially-that was like, kind of bitter about the fact, that, you know

Ross Golan: They were a boyband?

Savan Kotcha: And he was not the talented one. He wasn’t the singer, and he wasn’t the star. And you know which one I’m talking about…

Ross Golan: Of course.

Savan Kotecha: And he then started having something against me and against that process, I think. And, you know, maybe we could have been more inviting in the creative process during album 2 (Take Me Home) and not been so…authoritative.

At that point, Louis STILL wasn’t in a position where he could really be the leader. None of them were because the creative process wasn’t inviting still. It wouldn’t be until the third album

The conclusion here isn’t that Louis isn’t outspoken, or that he didn’t care about business or that he didn’t defend the band, or that he didn’t want to write more, or that he didn’t want to make connections. No one here is arguing that he didn’t care at all or not giving him credit for anything. The point I‘ve been making for days now and that people don’t seem to get (one way or another, because I’ve gotten very unpleasant messages about how he’s not equipped to be a businessman and shit like that that I’ve just decided not to publish at all), is that things don’t have to be black and white

I don’t think ANYONE was the leader of 1D. I think that Louis’ personality made him stand out more in certain aspects (such as meetings with their team), and because people need to label everything all the time, instead of describing it as it was, it took the position of “de facto leader”

The problem here isn’t even that people believe he’s the de facto leader, that wouldn’t concern me at all in and of itself because who cares? It’s not hurting anyone… The problem is that it puts an excessive amount of weight on Louis’ shoulders, I also explained this. It’s this dichotomy of a person who basically carried the whole band during its five years but that also is completely defenseless and at the mercy of binding contracts to even choose the socks he wears

These sort of preconceptions aren’t harmful by themselves, they wouldn’t be harmful in a normal band. I wouldn’t have a problem with this preconception if Louis was Calum Hood and this was 5SOS, my problem is that this is One Direction and preconceptions and conspiracies have tormented these guys for YEARS. No conspiracy and no preconception is innocent, they all have to be dismantled, we have to examine EVERYTHING that leads to absolutes if we want a chance at healing the fandom, and I don’t mean the 1D fandom because that’s gone now, it’s never gonna heal, I mean Louis’ specifically

If we want a chance at him being left alone from Larries these things have to go. Stop seeing him as this commodity that you can just paint over and start seeing him as a person, not a caricature

That interview also doesn’t say anything about him taking any calls business or otherwise. I don’t think anyone has ever said it and I have no idea where it came from because I’ve found zero sources. The interview doesn’t mention him “talking about certain things“ either, it’s just what I pasted here. That’s all of it. Everything else comes from years and years of stretching this one question out of this one interview done when Louis was still 20 and 1D had less than 2 years in the music industry. It’s no exactly the smoking gun y’all think it is, guys. Same with the Savan Kotecha podcast

Then the rest of what you say is just noise, man. IDK what to tell you. It’s just noise. If Louis had ran the show BTS for five years, then he’d have access to the best producers and writers on speed dial, why would he not being Harry Styles hinder how he’s perceived by the people that work backstage? They’d recognize the person that was “the backbone of 1D” for who he is because those things spread in the business. If LOUIS said that wasn’t happening, then it’s because your preconception was wrong and you took a bunch of things out of context to create a “narrative” that simply wasn’t real. Louis was dedicated to the band and wanted to write for it and involve himself in the creative side and he GENUINELY WAS IMPORTANT for the band, but he wasn’t its backbone or its de facto leader

Simon didn’t wantt Liam on his label probably because he couldn’t afford him, btw. He decided to stick with Louis because they’ve been thick as thieves since 2014 and those contracts cost money and Syco is a very small label with very limited resources, so they couldn’t offer anything to more than one member. I’m aware that I’m making assumptions here, but they very much align with reality, especially now that Syco lost so many other acts and now that Fifth Harmony disbanded and Syco landed only Lauren (Camila being like Zayn) and having to leave Ally, Dinah, and Normani go to other labels. That doesn’t mean they saw no value in them (in fact, I think Lauren is the one faring the worst), it’s just that they can only afford so much

And how much can you grin on one report written by the HUFFINGTON POST in 2016?X I’m talking about the “Louis hugged industry people that one time” comment you made. Once again, I’m not saying he doesn’t know anyone. I’m saying I BELIEVE WHAT HE SAYS. If he says he can’t easily get the producers and writers he wants, then I’m going to believe him. And that one report doesn’t really change anything for me. It’s, once again, very conspiracy theorist behavior to put more weight on an isolated report from an untrustworthy source three years ago than on Louis’ own words. If he really had enough reach to be friendly with everyone in the industry, then he’d be able to get any producer he wants

You can’t have this dichotomy that you present in this very ask of “they’re not picking up the phone because he’s Harry Styles” but he was the de facto leader of the biggest band on the planet for five years and everyone in the music industry knows him. It just doesn’t mesh together. You’re placing him in the same impossible position Larries are placing him and that’s harmful. He needs fans that see him as a person and you, I’m sorry to tell you, do not. You see him as a caricaturesque figure that can both be incredibly important and incredibly subjugated

“He has the connects in the business is all I was trying o state” 1. no that’s not all you were trying to state. 2. According to himself, he doesn’t have all the connects. He’s clearly close enough to be friendly with Rob Stringer, but that doesn’t mean that Rob Stringer will lift a finger for him and according to Louis, he’s not.. But that doesn’t mean that Louis can’t get ANYONE or that he’s being sabotaged. As always, truth lies somewhere in the middle. The only reason it’s harder to spot in this case is that people stretch it on every possible side so much

I know this is long as fuck and I probably lost any person that was willing to read my drivel in the first place, but I just really think it’s important that you start taking what LOUIS SAYS ABOUT LOUIS as fact, instead of twisting it around to present alternative facts that would present a reality that will please you more. It starts at “Louis was the de facto leader” and it ends as “he’s been faking fatherhood for three years and lied about his mother’s last few days” Sick..

#debunked #leader Louis

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girlmood · 5 years

Text

so yesterday, after crying about my phone being in the hands of some stubborn, unsophisticated uber driver, my mind kept going back to something i’m a bit obsessed with. i have had these obsessive and compulsive thoughts for around a year and a long bit now, and they make me feel unsafe because they revolve around someone. the thoughts themselves are innocent, yet they’re incessant and i feel that they get in the way of being active and focused on things.

for a long time now i’ve tried to make sense of these thoughts.

i’ve come to the conclusion that these thoughts are in the way of something.

whenever i am daydreaming this recurring thought, i close my eyes. i reflect and become drowsy. even when i am trying to reject these thoughts i try and use sleep. needless to say that this gets in the way of things like reading and creating. however, i always insist when people ask that i am always busy reading and creating. in effect i am if i am daydreaming something all the time, BUT i am not putting pen to paper, am i?

i close my eyes to my reality, the outside world. i live in my interior.

i do this because it is easier.

i have said that i choose to obsess over this thing because it calms and soothes me. i always knew that the facile nature of just thinking something alone and not doing anything with it made me feel freer.

yesterday, however, it was difficult to cry about my phone OR this thing. it felt forced to encourage tears even though i felt a hollowness inside. when i noticed that this uncomfortable moment was taking place, i berated myself for not telling me how i really feel. THAT made me cry. knowing that there are things concealed from myself within myself is a fact that terrorizes me more and more each day i get older, especially because i think “I did psychology! Why don’t I know what is wrong with me?”

if i had been focusing on saturday night, i would have my phone. i was drunk and sleepy so i did not hear the uber driver trying to return it to me (or so he says). i also have no memory of the situation. i just have no phone right now.

if i admit to myself that i feel what i am scared i feel because i don’t know it, in regards to the obsession (though admitting this would no longer make it an obsession -- it would practically free me), then i must open my eyes and focus and take action towards it. it isn’t a bad thing to want what i am daydreaming about. i argue that it doesn’t make sense, but it does. my issue is that i cannot go a day without thinking about it in some form. i want to be able to focus.

i am taking a while to get to my point here but i think that this does further emphasise the importance of what my point is, to be fair.

anyways, i cried when i talked about my lack of focus, and how really, all i want to do is wri--... wri--

i couldn’t say the word “write” because i got choked up by my tears all of a sudden.

when i finally realised that “i’m not letting myself write, or create at all, by my lack of focus” i started sobbing like a child bereaved of ice cream.

i use that obsession, i use alcohol and drugs and social media and films, all to distract myself from what i truly want to do.

I want to write.

i do english. i tell myself it is because the teacher i had a crush on replied to a letter i’d given her; she said she could see me being “the next j.k rowling.” i’m sure that was meant as a compliment back then. there is also the fact that i never intended with continuing on with education past year 11 until we had to by law, but after enjoying my sixth form subjects, i found it incredulous that i had to pick just one for university, and english seems to be the perfect avenue in which to incorporate media, sociology and psychology (i also never got to do philosophy and i never continued on with french after gcses, so i also hoped to approach them in my courses).

but really, i do english because i’ve always been a good writer.

that is a bold claim to make, but in the past years i have made many bold claims. i am a sagittarius! it is our job to make bold claims and when asked to elaborate on that, we say no! like, that meme format was born out of sagittarianism.

for the sake of talking, because us sagittarians also do love the sound of our own voices, i will elaborate THIS ONE TIME.

i wrote many songs when i was younger, and used to perform them with my sister and cousins. there was this song called ��girls style” that i still remember the chorus of. i must’ve written it when i was like, 7 or 8 years old? i swear, though, it’s good enough to be on a dolly advert or a song that jojo siwa could get more famous of. i think it must’ve been inspired by bratz too... anyways, that was a good song, is my point. i don’t think i could write it again and it could be as good because, for one, i don’t identify as a girl anymore.

there was also another song that i wrote, i don’t remember how it goes, but i know once beyoncé came out with “irreplaceable” i was infuriated because the song i wrote had the exact same subject matter and tone as her song (but actually who was i telling “to the left, to the left” at 8 years old? rolling WHO around in the CAR? that I BOUGHT? for WHO?) somehow i swore blind that beyoncé had stole my song, and even though she was my whole life even back then, i had to unstan for a bit because i was mad at her.

imagine.

i’m writing beyoncé level songs at 8 years old.

okay, i may not be THAT good -- well, actually, most of the songs on b’day aren’t so intangible for an 8 year old. not to say it isn’t a masterpiece, like every other thing beyoncé has done ever since and before and god I LOVE THAT WOMAN, but you know, i was in that ballpark, i guess, maybe...

or maybe not but ANYHOW i also learned to read at quite an early age, think it must’ve been 3 or something (despite how intelligent he is, i can’t imagine my 4 year old cousin being able to read right now, so that must have been a shock to my mother) and i was pretty artistic at a young age too, despite my main interests being in science at that time.

i remember being in year 3 and writing a poem about ice cream that my teacher would never stop bringing up even after i left his year. i also drew a portrait of my best friend that year, and trust me, it was so good, the whole class was in awe. no joke.

funnily enough, though, for a while, i used to deny that those things happened. you know, the pride my year 3 teacher felt or the way my best friend looked at me when she saw how well i depicted her at, again, only 8 years old. i forgot about them until now, 13 years later, in my last semester of university.

my best friend from secondary school and my dad were so obsessed with this journal i used to bring around. my best friend used to write in it from time to time. i was so perplexed as to why she liked it so much that eventually it weirded me out and i stopped bringing the journal to school. (sorry mia, still love you!) i went to jamaica for two weeks when i was 15 and brought that journal with me, and my dad read every entry and seemed so excited by it as well that i just. stopped bringing it to show him. he still asks about it, and if i’m still writing in general. i give him mono-syllabic answers and hopes that he doesn’t ask any further questions (i mean perhaps that is because the moment i visited jamaica was also the moment i realised i really liked this one girl and since then i’ve realised i am a lesbian and since all i was doing was writing about this one girl for three years... i didn’t want to share anything too incriminating with him, a known homophobe, naturally)

in all of these instances, you can see that people enjoy my art. there isn’t an instance in which they’ve protested against it, even when i’ve explicitly named people in that journal or not everyone likes ice cream. but you can also see that i somehow conveniently forget that. like. “people enjoy my art” does not compute in my mind for a long time. it is a sentence that does not make sense, by every word.

people?

outside of myself?

enjoy?

like, actively consume and are amused?

my?

ME?

art?

that’s BOLD, you believe you create art? ART?

well, what else would you call it? what else would you say? i’m creating something whimsical here.

i’m currently studying critical aesthetics, and as far as i’ve read for this class, i can perfectly claim that the creations i allow to be consumed as such ARE in fact, poetry, by the basis of many of these conflicting philosophers.

but obviously, before three months ago, i didn’t know much about what aristotle, hume, hegel and such had to say about art and creating. however i always know i want my every endeavour to be artful. i’ve been enamoured with the concept of aesthetic for a long time -- perhaps this was vapourwave’s doing -- and i know i daydream a lot. it’s where the mental illnesses i’m plagued with permeate these naturally creative realms of my mind and distort them and they become unhealthy obsessions that i react compulsively toward.

i’ve been to therapy and counselling and have heard the same thing. i’ve even heard it from a friend who really inspires me recently -- overthinking is not a bad thing. you just have to know how to control it so that it benefits you. overthinking could not be the bane of my existence because i probably would not be able to create without it. however, it’s dysfunctional because i don’t control it. i always think it’s about not being able to “turn my brain off”, which is impossible apart from braindeath, which i think is what i accidentally purposely try to allude to, but that isn’t what control is.

control... is a scary word. a hell of an intimidating word for someone who is considered by many to be free-spirited and laid back. but control could have saved me the frustration of a missing phone for two days. control did save me from this obsession from furthering at one point, but after one event i lost control and have not regained it since. it is easy to blame the person in question but she hadn’t done anything wrong. i’m not really doing anything wrong. i just need to control myself.

last year, i meditated a lot. this was perhaps i was smoking weed and normal tobacco, thinking i could find myself in those vices, yet felt so paranoid and low. when you meditate, it isn’t really about controlling your thoughts by blocking them out. rather, meditation is about controlling where your mind is. where you focus. it’s choosing to relax.

strange as it sounds, relaxation is not an easy choice to make.

i often mistake relaxing for being idle. the major difference is in my thoughts. being idle allows for thoughts to intrude upon me and be incessant and unnerving.

being idle is unfortunately a constant in my life.

it isn’t that i haven’t got anything to do. it’s just easy to be idle.

somewhere in the bible (no, i don’t care enough to go and look it up) it says “idle hands give the devil play”. or it’s a jamaican proverb. my mum says it a lot. anyhow, it rings true in every sense for me. the “devil”, my unconscious “ego”, base impulses, “play” with my mind, they swing my “idle hands”, make them shape their way, clap their way, ball their way. an innocent hand clapping game played until my hands are sore. i’m always throwing my hands at the devil to let him do what he wants.

relaxing is stopping the hand game. i put my hands down and watch the devil wait for me to parttake once again, saying encouraging things. there, i control my passivity. i spectate my own mind.

right now, i’m relaxing. i am in bed, but also while typing this i am taking my time to focus, be honest and try not to digress. it feels so tranquil. i have written a lot but i want my point to get across so i can feel understood.

i feel like i have misguided my friends about who i am for a long time. or have i? it’s easy to be the messy black lesbian who loves one direction and is “woke” but there is this thing that i notice when i am with them: i am relaxed. well, in most instances. i listen to what they are telling me, because i enjoy listening in general but also because i love them.

in my teenage years when i decidedly “wasn’t into friendships”, i would still listen to the people i hung around with. i’d complain about them on twitter after, which funnily enough people still joke that i do but i really do not (and CAN not) do it as much as i used to but i know by idly listening to them and not opening up i let all sorts of demons in because they can intrude unlike people you haven’t given the key to.

now i am choosing to open up because people aren’t so bad, and people mostly like me. even if they didn’t, however, it doesn’t actually matter.

me existing regardless of anyone else is the point here, despite me being a good writer. i think that’s what makes writing good. i think that is what makes art good. it has the ability to exist and encourage thought.

i shouldn’t be afraid to write because i think i’m too depressed or messy or something i don’t like will come to fruition because that isn’t what its about. creating is creating. no one else would have written this. i don’t expect this to be winning the nobel book prize any time soon. i want to finally find peace in my honesty. i have been a compulsive liar for too long and it has become monstrous. now i must relax and take the true easy path in the end: the one which terrifies me the most.

i am going to be disciplined, patient, open. honest, forgiving, sensitive.

i do love to be a mystery but it isn’t fun if it’s causing you pain and you’re a mystery to yourself for such a long time.

one way i’m going to solve the enigma that is myself, as well as the world, is writing.

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sanerontheinside · 7 years

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*cracks knuckles* *grins* Questions: 8, 10, 13, 19. *cackles*

oooooh you lil shitLong Post, hit J to skipsorry mobile userswait neverfuckingmind I put it under a cut anyway wt f k e n o p e

8. What is one thing you would change about any movie, show, book, etc?

JA needs to burn, PT must be rewritten to fix various plot hiccups, the clones deserved so much better, Obi-Wan doesn’t deserve such massive levels of grief, and seriously some shit just don’t make sense.

But at this point it’s also difficult for me to distinguish between what is actually canon and what is fanon, or a popular fandom interpretation of canon.

Besides, there’s ReEntry. ReEntry makes sense.

Canon, you’re drunk. Go home.

13. If you could resurrect one dead character, or prevent them from dying, who would it be?

Qui-Gon Jinn. Finis Valorum. Asajj Ventress. Jango Fett. Tahl, Micah. Mace did not die. Padmé did not die, fuck that noise. … Shit. Xanatos.

Long answers under cut:

10. Do you think the Jedi were right or wrong?

Which time?

Ignoring the Sith? Sending Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan alone to Naboo after a suspected Darksider if not Sith? Insisting that they would not train Anakin without offering a single alternative (what in the actual fuck)? Focusing too much on Anakin’s massive potential and Dark possibilities in his future rather than on the nine-year-old boy in front of them?

Making Obi-Wan a War Councilor and spreading him thin as paste across most of Republic Space? Bending and bending and bending before the Senate until they couldn’t even fight back charges against Ahsoka?

Allowing themselves to be run for hundreds of years by an old troll who is the last of his species, with only one other like him, who’s lost generations of friends and children by then, whose only way to cope with that kind of loss is probably repression, and leads to a shift of Jedi philosophy in that general direction?

In some ways, an institution as old as the Republic was doomed to fail eventually.

But, see, the Ruusan Reformation was built to prevent another war with the Sith, to safeguard the Republic against it. Sith were impossible because the Order of that time had taken great pains to wipe out every last vestige of Sith texts and artefacts, save what they kept to learn from themselves.

Isn’t that funny? That’s when they decided to bring younglings to the Temple, to train them early so they would never get out of control and Fall. They destroyed the ancient texts, yet left the door open for the formation of a new and far more dangerous line of Sith.

Yet the Ruussan Reformation wasn’t exactly something they’d readily agreed to. Back in the days before the Reformation, the Jedi had been a truly independent Order. They won the war against the Sith, and protected the Republic worlds with their own army and navy. But when the dust settled, the Chancellor of the Republic told them, well, the Republic will not trust you unless you give up your army and your navy, because they see you as a threat. The Reformation doesn’t say, not in so many words, that the Jedi will come to rely only on the Senate for funds and mission assignments.

You know… the Chancellor at the time was named Tarsus Valorum. He was the first of his family, a line of noted Force Sensitives, not to go to the Jedi, but pursue a career in politics instead. And the Valorum we know of is a direct descendent. Finis, end of the line. Finis, end of the Republic, the Republic falls with him. Yes I am sort of hinting that Tarsus Valorum might’ve been a Sith.

Anyway, clever headcanons aside, it’s so easy to point out where the Order was wrong, but by the time we see them? There’s hardly any ‘right’ to choose. Remember that Valorum had to go behind the Senate’s back to send Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon to Naboo—the Sith certainly didn’t anticipate Jedi involvement.

Still, you ask if the Jedi were ever right. When given the option, multiple times over the course of apprenticeship and Knighthood, to leave the Order, what did Obi-Wan choose? Anakin? They chose to stay. So, in the end, there must have been something right about that, don’t you think?

19. What’s your opinion on legends/expanded universe?

Um.

Well it’s… interesting. I periodically go diving into Wookiepedia, which is like broken telephone research in a lot of cases—there isn’t even a guarantee that the person who wrote the page got the point of the original source, or that a minor detail I would find immensely useful ever made it to the page. Some things are outright crazy. Some things are spectacular. Some things are outright spectacularly contradictory.

Legends saw great potential, took it, ran with it, sometimes to Olympus and sometimes off a bloody cliff. JA can burn, but at the same time, while most of JA feels like a poorly-drawn caricature, characters like Zan Arbor are unforgettable. Were I to, idk, in some fever dream, decide write Sidious as a woman, Zan Arbor would be the place I’d start, I think. Certain JA events seem to me important enough to keep.

On the one hand, it was nice to get hard details on the shape of economic warfare the Sith waged on the Republic. On the other hand, Sidious’s origin is the most bizarre bit of horseshit I’ve ever seen summarised on a Wookie-page and the very idea that Plageuis was still alive near the time of Naboo makes me shake with rage because it (high on the list of shit I thought I never would say) robs Palpatine of something vital to his character.

In much the same way, I can’t stand that TCW overwrote the comics’ ending for Valorum, even showed him active in politics again like his career hadn’t ended with the Vote of No Confidence. That was a death sentence in itself. And, since TCW can technically be considered Legends material, parts of it I simply cannot accept. It filled an important blank, when it came to the ROTS portrayal of Order 66. In ROTS, it looked like some grand conspiracy, but the introduction of the chips was wrenching and necessary. TCW did a lot for clone feels, and for our feels for secondary characters in the movies—like Plo Koon, yes, hello, you can pry my favourite Jedi dad from my cold dead fingers. On the other hand, Maul, suddenly returned to life? There are ways that can be done, and done well. This, in my view, was not one of them.

Rebels… I haven’t seen Rebels, so this part should be taken with a grain of salt, but little individual plot points I’ve seen fill me with no great confidence. I’m seriously spoiled by @deadcatwithaflamethrower RE:JotW Echo timeline. Actually overall I’m spoiled by ReEntry.

Yet, it’s the Legends tab of Wookiepedia that gives you a much richer understanding of Twi'lek and Ryl culture. Say what you will about fetishising and misogyny—and fandom is certainly prone to that when given Twi'lek slave culture as a vehicle for it—it’s incredibly interesting to see how Twi'lek culture changed, adapted, took advantage of others’ perception to hide something far more deadly, their very own Resistance movement. Whoever went so far in depth with Ryl and Twi'lek culture knew a thing or two about what they were doing.

Similarly, the Legends expansion of Mandalorian culture is spectacular, and sheds an uncomfortable light on the TCW Mandalore. At times, certainly at times like these, conflict between different Legends sources is incredible. (Though, give me a reason to take Satine down a peg and I’ll take it, and I’m still not sure that isn’t ingrained misogyny on my part.)

I can’t speak to Legends’ treatment of female characters, either. The characters I am familiar with? Ventress, Komari Vosa? Those stories don’t end well. Unfortunately I don’t have much time or, truthfully, inclination, to research every single character who exists only in the comics and books, particularly if I don’t often work with that part of the timeline.

ask me things | sw ask meme

#obaewankenope #what have you done #ask me things #urgh #sw ask meme

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indi-flying-with-dragons · 7 years

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1, 2, 15, 16, and 18 XD

HEY MAN XD How ya doing? :3 *HUGGLES* Sorry for getting to this late. xD Around this time of night things calm down enough and I finished going through my feed usually so I tend to have more of a breather for things like this. XD

Let me see here. >.>~~~

1: What is the most useless fact you know?

Oh shit let me think? XD You’d have to define “useless” there man because I don’t really categorize things into things like this. e.O O.e I mean I have “disgusting” or “weird” or “shocking” or “little-known” or “freaky” or “could be useful but isn’t yet” along with “useful” and “cool” and “awesome” and “funny” categories. Not “useless.” O.o

….-^- I shall do one from the “random” category and shake them around and see what I pick from a hat! *nod nod* -^-

*fails when most of the things he draws out are actually cool or helpful or important*. … -///- Nrrr. I not do this good eh?

… SCREW THIS. >^^

Did you know that blue feathers are a structural color? :D Come from the structure of the feather itself and not any pigments? (Unless you’re a parrot because they can make rare color pigments naturally like blue, red, yellow, and green!) Purple is another structural color, same with iridescence. :3 You don’t see it so well unless there’s sunlight. :D

Red, yellow, orange, shades of brown, shades of grey and black, are all pigment-based colors. :D Red, yellow, orange are all from one’s diet (unless you’re a parrot!), with green being a combination of the yellow pigment the blue structural color. :3

White is a structural color and complete absence of pigment at all. :D So it wears down more easily than black which has a lot of pigment reinforcing the feather structure from wear and tear. Which is why most bird species that fly a lot usually have a darker color band along the edges of their flight feathers, to stop that wear and tear, if their wings aren’t already a darker color. :3

2: What was your most awkward “hahaha…oh wait you’re serious” moment?

Geeze have to have one come to my mind. Hrm. I KNOW I’ve some. Or rather… I know I’ve done a FUCK-TON of “You’re totally serious …wait you’re actually joking? oops.” which is the exact opposite I’d say. *grins*

…Fuck it’s not actually coming to me. I just keep getting plenty of “you’re serious… oh wait you were joking the whole time? Ahahah… *belated laugh*” instead. O.e

I don’t have the memory for things like this. T^T (And you overthink things a lot!) Shush! (NEVAH -^-) -.-;;; …Fuck this I’m gonna do what comes to my mind instead. -^-;;;My dad was leading into a pun with me totally unknowing. He was telling a pretty serious-sounding story, and I was focusing more on his lips to lip-read him, and not noticing the little glint of mischief in his eyes. Then he ended with a very VERY bad pun about a pig somehow. (Don’t fully remember it, thankfully!) I got confused for several long beats… then deadpanned when I finally got it. I told him it was P.U. two-thirds of a pun and so bad.

He laughed a lot and then proceeded to keep getting my mind to fill in his puns for him, even ending up at the end drawing out something and my mind filled in the joke FOR him without him having to say a word. He cracked up so hard, I was laughing yet complaining about him doing that.

Then I said (My mom was also in the room btw): “MOM! Make my dad stop using my mind against meeeeee!”

Then we all took in how that SOUNDED, especially out of context, and just erupted into total laughter for many long minutes. xD One of the hardest we’ve laughed as a group that I can think of. XD I was proud of that bit. XD Even if I didn’t like the PUNishment my dad subjected me to beforehand. -x-;;

15: How would you describe Tumblr to a friend who has never heard of it?

A site full of social justice stuff, discourse, random memes, cool stuff, and really weird things you never heard before, all stuffed into one thing. The IM function kinda sucks. The tag system is tricky to figure out. But I really love reblogging things to have on my blog as some sort of whacked up collector fetish.

…What? Why are you giving me that look?

Wait. WAIT

COME BAHCK

16: What is the single most liberating thought that you’ve ever had?

Well there’s one that recently comes to mind. To realize that there isn’t much of a separation between me in this lifetime and me in my spirit. That, while I had almost idolized my spirit self because I KNEW what to expect then and was laid back and calm and not the frazzled nervous wreck I feel myself to be in this lifetime… there really isn’t that much difference at all. In this lifetime, I’m acting exactly as how my spirit self would act… because I AM my spirit self.

I just don’t have the information I am used to having back at home, which frazzles me quite a bit. But all the good things I saw in my spirit self, I have in abundance here as well. And all the things I don’t like about this physical life self, I’ve done and encountered plenty of times back at home. I just didn’t really pay attention to those as much. No matter where I am, no matter how much or little I remember, I AM the same exact person here in this life as I am back at home. I’m just responding to a different situation, with some limitations on hand that makes it more tricky for me than I’m usually used to handling.

That really helped me a fuck ton that revelation. :) I was finally ready to believe it and integrate that into my perception of the world around me. :) Finally. X>X~

18: What’s the worst case of “spoiled rotten” that you’ve seen?Let’s see…

I’m not going off in person because I can’t overhear that well IRL due to being hard-of-hearing even WITH my cochlear implants. I’m going off what I saw online since I can more consistently actually know what the fuck people are saying in that format.

There was someone who was taking a photo of them in their car, a teenager, with a literal wad of cash in their purse, simultaneously complaining about not getting something better, as well as bragging about what they already had. Then I heard some agency went in and busted their parents up over the incriminating wad of cash in the purse, since that was pretty good evidence their parents had been doing some illicit activities. And this person saw fit to complain and throw a fit over it, and jump on the government agency as being the “bad guys” and themself and their parents being “poor victims of a crime” no matter how many people tried to explain to them on social media why they, that person themselves, had actually fucked up.

#long post #Des friend #LOL #funny #ask game #answering a submission #answering #answers #I had fun XD #Thanks for this man!#You're awesome XD

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swearronchanel · 7 years

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ALRIGHT HERE IT FINALLY IS; 6.03 by me

I apologize in advance: this will be lengthy LONG AF, as it’ll be part-my thoughts watching live & part-post comments to certain thoughts

ALSO** DISCLAIMER** I SHOULD’VE SAID THIS A WHILE AGO BUT I’LL SAY IT NOW that I type my thoughts VERBATIM, which is why it’s never in essay format because eh, it’s not me. IT ALSO MEANS I CURSE A LOT IM SORRY IT JUST COMES OUT, I’M NOT ELOQUENT ENOUGH TO MAKE MY POINT WITH BETTER WORDS .. Anyway I shall begin, feel free to comment on anything *just don’t come @ me for literally just thinking something*

Ready @flyingnonny, @marialujan22

Cute little community, alright let’s see what’s going down

Chinese laundry a little stereotypical but I get it

SHELAGH’S UNIFORM BARELY FIT HA AW

“dear Patrick!” Laura is so adorable I can’t

The smiles in the mirror!! *shit after I think about it, more parallels. Shelagh’s looked in the mirror in so many of her great scenes. Series 1! & 2! & was that 4 with the nurse’s uniform the first time! Ah my bby growing up 😭

Lol sister Ursula’s annoying ass still here .. not for LONG THOUGH😊

NO ONE INVITED U ALONG SIS

dead @ Patrick’s reaction, someone gif it

Her mother in law looks mean as hell

Is Lucy mixed?

ah yep called it. Damn deported? Too relevant today..

PHYLLIS

I just get so excited now I love her

Lmao remember when I legit didn’t like her because of her comments to Shelagh before she came back to nursing. DONT WORRY IM OVER THAT

Shelagh looks so pretty!! More of her in cute outfits with the hair down pls 😍

Here for her 1962 wardrobe

Lol lullaby type music what’s she pulling out

“Tempting fate” stop! No bby everything will be okay if not I’m losing my shit

Sister J & Shelagh moments are precious ** Ah you guys reminded me of again another parallel I’m so here for it.

But like if she’s almost halfway as sister j says, has she told everyone already? we shall see, or maybe it’ll be implied

Shelagh saying “WHAT?” is most of my internal monologue in just about all my classes

FUCK, SISTER URSULA ARE YOU FOR REAL

Phyllis’s hand raise tryna avoid actually saying “no offense” to Dr Turner is gold

UGH I CAND STAND THIS NUN UGH

I will bet all my the cash in my wallet (prob $30 at most) we’ll see a soft side to her and Ima still be like “adios puta”

Shelagh’s like “we have a game plan” aw she is pure gold, protect her at all costs what the hell!¡💖

Also if no one at nonnatus knows this could’ve been a perfect chance to tell them, or someone could’ve been eyeing her walking around the table and suspecting? Like Phyllis would notice, she knows everything

Shelagh looking at Patrick literally like “is this bitch serious??”

This isn’t Downton Abbey, I never hated a ‘main character’ (don’t come @ me I hated a few characters but still loved the show)

SISTER URSULA STRESSED? OH WELL

Yo did sister Julienne really not slide Shelagh a new uniform? She’s in a cute outfit but c'mon

Lol this lady knows she’s pregnant

Fred angrily spinning the wheel, I feel

DONT TOUCH THE ROLODEX

PHYLLIS COME AT HERRRRR

20 min visits, “OK”.

Oh no. I sense a sad story coming

Phyllis’s little run, precious

Sister Julienne spilling the tea, but again I don’t care about sister Ursula’s feelings or backstory

WAIT WHO CALLED A THREAT OF GETTING SHUT DOWN THOUGH? IT WASN’T ME BUT I REMEMBER READING IT? Lol score for u because I didn’t see this coming (even though I know damn well they’re not shutting down, like the show would be over)

PHYLLIS ANGRILY EATING IS ME

IDEALLY I’D WANNA SAY I’M TRIXIE BUT HONESTLY WHEN AM I NOT PHYLLIS

she’s my hero anyway, no disappointment

Angela is precious

Tim trying be funny lol but we actually hate sister Ursula

HA NO SQUIRRELS , WAIT so today literally a squirrel ran across the feet and I freaked out. My campus is full of squirrels but like I’m from NYC I don’t fuck with them.

Ok, A) Shelagh’s shoes kinda don’t match but I’ll let it go & 2) is it implied everyone @ nonnatus knows? Like how has she not had a checkup this whole time. I guess Patrick could but that’s doesn’t seem likely

Toad in the hole?? que eso?

I think I said the other day I think she’s watching tv somewhere

MAKE SISTER MJ RETIRE ?? UM HOW DARE U SAY A THING LIKE THAT

The table: *collective gasps* me: *LOUDER GASP*

EVERYONE WAS SHOOK WHEN SHE CALLED BARBARA A SLACKER

Why is babs taking it to heart? Like she sucks anyway

I love Phyllis damn it, not in a way I love Trixie and Shelagh though, it’s different I can’t explain it

I need Phyllis to encourage me to stay in university PLS (some one meet Linda Basset & send me a video of it)

Ah “delightful” screams. This show terrifies me to think about being pregnant one day lol. Like I thought my mother’s stories were bad enough but nah

Shelagh: *is frustrated* me: *gets frustrated* RELAX BBY

how did they really leave her alone, DAMN IT SISTER U, THIS THREATENED MISCARRIAGE WILL BE ON YOU

Also someone get her a new uniform she’s going to dirty her nice clothes

When did scrubs become a thing ?? my mother has like a zillion pairs & I can’t imagine her working in a dress all day. Omg I gotta find a picture one day from when she graduated nursing school she had such a similar style uniform to the nonnutans, I love it 😂

Patrick needs to put his damn finger down im tired of that shit. If he ever does it again with Shelagh I’ll flip a lid

Anyways..

Did she not want a girl?? @ in law

“no, a girls very special” aw

“MY WIFE IS SPREAD TOO THINLY” ha like on a cracker JK STOP STRESSING SHELAGH

“She wouldn’t appreciate the term Elderly primigravida” ha true man, remember she said that last series

lol I wanna see her reaction if they ever label her again

UM SIS YOU ARE TRYING TO STOP THEM FROM BEING COMPASSIONATE AND HELPFUL THOUGH?

get the fuck outta here, let them send sister MJ away I will revolt

Saw this scene haha, hope Ursula falls off

Damn came at Lucy, what’s wrong with Linda haha, that’s my gram’s name

She’s so chill about that, me? I wouldn’t let that go. I’m also so damn extra & annoying

“HELLS BELLS” Lmaoo

Not the same as Phyllis saying “Hells teeth” but that’s catchy

Also Patrick can’t type that’s funny

“mending your dress” FIRST OF ALL PATRICK, SHUT UP

YES SHELAGH TELL HIM

“Cool, calm, collected & professional” love her

SHE LAUGHED BUT CRINGED I NEED The GIF

You guys don’t understand, i need to screenshot a conversation with one of my friends. Her and I only ever use CtM screenshots for message reactions it’s so funny but also weird in a way😂 sometimes their cringes are better than basic memes

But to be honest they really have never fought? Lmao that moment could’ve been a little argument but they got over it too quick, bc/ how do they ALWAYS agree/get on? (Excluding the adoption issue but whatever)

Lol why did she have to get up, you get up Patrick

Her outfit is so cute !! My bby

AW!, they’re cute, I’ll forgive him

former nun sitting on a mans lap I love it!¡ without context it sounds funnier

“We’ll pull through, we always do” better be some foreshadow for something good!

I don’t think she has postpartum though

*SUCKS TEETH* UMM BABS not checking the baby is prob a bad move

Shelagh definitely has a baby bump at that angle, DOES EVERYONE KNOW or not WTF?

Bby you feel pain that’s not good u know this !

seriously does Barbara not see it

I’M MRS COLLIER OR WHATEVER BRINGING UP THE SUBJECT & BETTING ON IT

“Have you all been speculating?” HAHH

“Well I don’t approve of gambling on the premises” SHELAGH YOU ARE A GEM

seriously protect her at all costs, I know it’s coming but I don’t know when or how

ALSO THESE PATIENTS KNOW AND ARE ABOUT TO TELL EVERYONE THEY SEE, SO AGAIN, DO THEY KNOW @ NONNATUS?

shit they screaming, calm down ladies

“SPOILED UNGRATEFUL GIRL” SHIT SHE PLAYED HER

lol Patrick trying to play it all off like he’s calm, cool and collected

WHY IS THE INSPECTOR SHADY?

no one asked u to be honest keep it pushing

Also it’s 31 MINS IN & TRIXIE IS NOT HERE YET? like when is she coming? I’m less hopeful of her saving the day the more time goes bye :/

WHY IS THE BABY NOT BREATHING?

“how can you [maternity home] compete with that [hospital]?”

JUST WATCH

Don’t blame yourself Barbara :/

Again Shelagh’s having pain, it’s going to be soon isn’t it?

This better not be the heart to heart Laura mentioned ** ah we’re good it’s not

#SaveTheMaternityHome2k17

Shelagh is going to the bathroom OMG SHES GONNA BLEED NOW RIGHT

FUCK, SHE IS. MY BBY💔💔

DIOS MIO AYUDA ME

she’s so scared, I cry for her

“Hello nurse Crane, it’s Shelagh..” *omg she rarely introduces herself & even less as Shelagh & I feel no one calls her that but Sister J & Patrick?

PROTECT SHELAGH AT ALL COSTS

why St Cuthberts vs the London?

DOES THIS MEAN PHYLLIS KNOWS? I need answers

Phyllis being a badass simply walking down the hall

BEATRIX BBY💕💕

HERE SHE IS, LETS GET IT

I hope this baby lives omg

I mean baby Lin, baby Turner will happen

FUCK THE INSPECTION YOU’RE MORE IMPORTANT SHELAGH

THE MAGNIFICENT PHYLLIS CRANE

Shelagh in the hospital bed is breaking my heart I swear I don’t have

PHYLLIS IS GOING TO HANDLE SISTER URSULA & SAVE THE DAY

I wanted it to be Trixie but IM NOT MAD LETS GET IT PHYLLIS

ugh pls save the maternity home

my poor girl looking so sad **** also how did she get all her things on the table?

Give Laura Main every damn award this series, I don’t care if we’re only 3 episodes in.

Her bump looks more visible in the hospital gown? do you think it’s a pillow or something lol

TRAGIC BACKSTORY UNLOCKED

SHIT ITS SO SAD omg, I’m cryin

PHYLLIS FINALLY PRESSING SISTER URSULA, TELL HER

AW babs we all feel

Phyllis protecting Barbara aw

There’s not been as much Trixie as I had hoped 💔

But she’s back bitches and I’m happy I missed her

So Barbara smokes for real now, but Trixie doesn’t share her black cigarettes haha

Take your weak apology and go

I CALLED IT, DONT @ ME

I KNEW SISTER MJ WAS WATCHING TV SOMEWHERE

they put a bench out for her how sweet

Sister MJ saying “silence” then “shh it’s starting” is me every week watching this damn show

It hurts that I am so invested in this show

How did it happen I don’t know but I love it so much

Barbara’s ring is pretty

All is well & everything is almost back to normal and lovely *for now*

Sister Julienne is so faithful, like I really would struggle to be so compassionate

Sister Ursula is upset and I’m awful because I do not care

I knew they’d show her vulnerable side so we’d change our minds but I can’t

Sister Julienne you’re so great

It wasn’t a leak??

YES SHE’S ALIVE

“I’m going to the mother house” *squees* YES ENJOY, THANK YOU FOR THE DISTRESS, PLEASE BE ON YOUR WAY

Sister Julienne don’t ask her to reconsider

This was a sweet moment but still don’t like Sister Ursula

AW SISTER MJ I LOVE YOU

she’s so pure, protect her!

Nice leaving the door open Sister Ursula

HATE THE CHARACTER, but you HAVE TO ADMIT HARRIET WALTER IS AN EXCELLENT ACTRESS

Phyllis driving her is only right

YES SISTER J IS BACK IN CHARGE

#LETS GET IT 1962

Trixie’s concerned, WHERE IS SISTER MARY CYNTHIA?? ** I really thought Trixie was going to play a bigger role in this episode & I thought this was going to be a longer scene but there’s 5 more episodes, I won’t complain I’ll just be patient. LOL JK UM when is Trixie going to get some time to shine

Oh Shelagh 💔

Aw the Chen’s

OKAY THEY’RE CELEBRATING & EVERYONE’S HAPPY BUT DO THEY NOT KNOW ABOUT SHELAGH? ** **I’m still not sure if they even know she’s expecting but why was Sister Julienne not told she was in the hospital? I know it happened fast but there was time. I don’t like how this played out like it seemed pushed aside but I guess that’s what next episode will address (I hope)

Otherwise, excellent as always

AH VANESSA REDGRAVE & THE NARRATION >>

“We are all traveling through one another’s countries but it is no matter if we meet as strangers, for we can join forces and learn to love..” ah this so applies today ugh the world is insane

BONUS: PREVIEW FOR NEXT WEEK

New midwife = Valerie’s coming back which is cool but also she’s going to be problematic so *hmm* maybe not

Fred and Violet are cute but still cringing & laughing about them in episode 1

“..The way the world treats women” MORE PHYLLIS BEING THE MAGNIFICENT GEM SHE IS, I AM EXCITED

finding out Tom’s past will be interesting, I’m thinking his mom almost gave him away but then didn’t? probably was raised with out a dad maybe? We’ll see

“We were happy enough before and we’ll be happy again, whatever happens” I don’t freaking know if this is Patrick comforting or breaking but I’m going to BAWL NEXT WEEK. Shelagh’s face omg💔 I can’t take this like she’s been through so much! They’ve been through so much heartache, what more can they take. UGH WTF I feel like they never get to enjoy anything, & I know “that’s life” & “it’s a drama” or whatever you say but damn. I love this poor character so much (why?¿!) & she’s usually sad in every series !!

The End.🙃 it’s 1:52am, I should go to bed.

#call the midwife #Thoughts #lets get it 1962 #save nonnatus 2k17 #my bbys #PROTECT THEM AT ALL COSTS #especially shelagh this series #i mean it!#my commentaries™

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entomologistologist · 7 years

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I was tagged by @arbitrarystrawberry! Thank you! <3

Nickname: Haven't really got one. I have one internet friend who calls me Bean. I almost acquired the nickname Zap, but it didn't work out.

Sign: Political signs with candidates' names on them, mostly.

Favourite music artist: idk man I don't really listen to music by artist. Can I say Amy Grant?

Last tv show watched: uhhhh I keep meaning to watch some King of the Hill but I haven't been doing it. To be honest, I don't remember the last show I watched.

Last movie you watched in theatre: Rouge One. Didn't care for it.

What are you wearing right now: Pajamas.

What do you post: lol who knows. Political stuff (pro-life or anti-SJW mostly). Archie comic scans. Superman and Batman stuff. Spider-Man stuff. The occasional Warrior Cats fanart. Some Christian stuff. Random memes that strike my fancy.

Do you have any other blogs: Nope.

Why did you choose your URL: welllllll gather round, children. I've decided to tell the needlessly long version of this story. I'm warning you, this is way too detailed. PLEASE JUST SKIP TO THE NEXT QUESTION; THIS IS LONG AND BORING.

Okay, so one day a few years ago (it was the year I was taking chemistry, so probably like three years back?), my older sisters stumbled upon a long-cancelled children's cartoon on the TV set called Archie's Weird Mysteries. My sister Talia decided to become an Archie fan, so we all started watching this show ever night at 10pm, when it came on (we don't have no Netflix, no Hulu, no illegal online streaming! we watch things WHEN THEY COME ON).

Meanwhile, my sister Mariah had a story idea that she called her Adventure Psychologist story (at first I wanted to be mean and also include all the backstory of how she came up with her Adventure Psychologist story, since I'm going overboard with the explanations anyhow, but I won't). It was about a psychologist from outer space who did magic psychology on aliens and people. She was obsessed with this story idea. She would never shut up about it. This is important background information.

Now we'll get to the relevant part: The TV station that played Archie's Weird Mysteries had only a couple of actual commercials at a time. The rest of the commercial breaks were filled with promos. One of the shows they advertised was called Dex Hamilton Alien Entomologist. The promo itself was pretty bad (it did not convey any information about the show that is not communicated in the title, although I suppose it did at least define an entomologist as someone who studies bugs), but Mariah saw it and went, "Oh my gosh! An alien entomologist! That is basically the exact same thing as an alien psychologist! I have to watch this show," to which I replied, "wow, Mariah, that's dumb; we watch enough children's cartoons already."

But Mariah wanted to watch it anyway. The first time she tried, she failed because she did not understand time zones. I thought it would be dumb for us to start watching the show, but by the second time she tried to watch it (they only played one thirty-minute episode a week), I had warmed up to it slightly. So the big day when Mariah would watch this show finally rolled around. Talia was going to watch with her, too. I was waaaaay to mature to watch another kid’s show, so I opted to spend the time they were watching TV to go rake the lawn, so I’d be done raking and could afford to spend the rest of Saturday watching Monk reruns (ion television played Monk on Saturdays back then, and as mentioned, we watch TV shows when the TV station people tell us to watch TV shows). So I raked the leaves while they watched their show. Then I came in and asked how they liked it (since I had warmed up to the idea, I had decided that if they liked it, I would try it next week now that the waters had been tested and everything). They liked it. So the next week, I watched whatever episode the TV gods deigned to air that day.

And from that point on until today and probably tomorrow and the day after that, I was/am/will be utterly consumed by that TV show.

One of the main characters from the show is called Zap Monogan. He was created with human and insect DNA mixed together, and in one episode they referenced him making cocoons or chrysalises in his sleep or something. I was thinking about that and got really confused because I realized that I really knew jack squat about chrysalises. I knew cocoons were silk, but I realized I had absolutely positively no idea what they were made of. So I asked Talia and she didn’t know either.

So I went to Wikipedia to research chrysalises. I found out that chrysalises are made out of the outer skin of the creature inside. This confused me as to how Zap could possibly use a chrysalis, since he’s basically a human with mammal skin and stuff. Then eventually I found out that Zap makes cocoons, not chrysalises. So I researched cocoons and I found out that the chemical that silkworms melt the silk with when they escape from a cocoon is called cocoonase. Obviously, the next question was to find out as much about cocoonase and the glands that produce silk as possible. So I madly searched on Wikipedia, but it turns out that most people don’t care about conoonase or really entomology in general, so there isn’t exactly as much information on cocoon formation as there is about, say, human physiology. Priorities.

I never actually found that much information about cocoons (I sort of gave up. Sorry.) but I eventually found out about a guy named Pierre André Latreille. This dude was a famous French entomologist during the 18th and 19th century, in fact, he was nicknamed The Prince of Entomologists, so it’s no surprise I eventually stumbled upon him.

He was born in France in 1762, and not into the best family situation. There are no surviving records of his mother’s identity, and his father wanted nothing to do with him, although he did send his kid money. As a young man, Latreille became a priest. Latreille never actually carried out any of his priestly duties. He was too busy chasing bugs.

In 1790, the revolutionaries had decided that all priests were required to take an oath promising to adhere to the Civil Constitution of the Clergy. Latreille ended up missing the deadline to accept the oath and was thrown in prison.

Then one day, the prison physician found Latreille literally crawling around on the prison floor chasing a beetle like an insane person. Latreille eagerly told the doctor what he was so excited about. The doctor, to his credit, actually was impressed. You see, we aren’t talking about some run of the mill Coccinella septempunctata here. This was a Necrobia ruficollis—a very rare beetle. Once Latreille explained this, the doctor took the specimen and brought it to a local naturalist, Bory de Saint Vincent, who was a fan of Latreille’s and managed to pull a few strings and get Latreille released from prison. This is especially bizarre when we note that Saint Vincent was only fifteen when all this was happening, and yet somehow a fifteen-year-old could decide who lived and who died. Apparently, the Get Out of Jail Free card came with a plus one, because Damkaer reveals that one of Latreille’s cellmates was freed as well. All the others were killed.

Wow, I thought. That’s ridiculously cool! So I started researching entomologists a lot. I made a weird color-coded chart detailing which French entomologists of the 1800s were friends with each other. It was dorky. Very, very dorky.

Then I started a tumblr, and I was like, and entomologist is a person who studies insects, and I’m a person who studies people who study insects, so I’m an entomologistologist.

See, I warned you that would be long.

Do you get asks regularly: I have never in my entire life gotten an ask. SOMEONE ASK ME SOMETHING PLS. I've been tagged in posts before, though.

Hogwarts house: what I AM is probably Ravenclaw. What I'd WANT to be is Gryffindor.

Patronus: ummm a moth maybe. I haven't really thought about it.

Pokemon team: I only play on Pokemonshowdown.com using gen1 random battles, so I'll take this as a chance to list six random Pokemon that I like: Umbreon, Raichu, Nidorino (male), Mew, Ninetales, and Arcanine.

Favourite colour: Pinkish lavender.

Favourite characters: Zap Monogan from the show Dex Hamilton Alien Entomologist. Zap Zap Zap Zap Zap Zap Zap I love you, Zap. Other favorite characters include Dex himself, Jenny 10 and Tung from the same show, Jughead from Archie comics, Peter Parker, Clark Kent, Bruce Wayne, Dick Grayson, Twilight Sparkle and Spike from MLP, Adrian Monk from Monk, and Holden Caulfield from Catcher in the Rye.

Hobbies/crafts: Writing, listening to the radio, and speech and debate.

Collect anything? Pennies. I sorted them by decade but then I jumped and jostled the room enough that they all fell over. But the point of collecting them is to sort them by year, so I should get around to reorganizing them, soon.

Current challenges you face: I need to pray more. So much more. And I need to learn that my friends don't secretly hate me.

Things you’re looking forward to? My next speech and debate tournaments, buying my sister Mariah birthday presents, buying the hardcover of The Lost Girl of Astor Street by Stephanie Morrill, and going to sleep for a nice long time.

Anything you want to promote? Seek God.

I’m tagging @storymaker-the-christian-echidna and @nightcrawler-fan.

#you thought yours was long strawberry #I can't believe I spent over 1100 words describing choosing my url #I'm so sorry #if anyone at all actually read that--even just one person--I'd be shocked

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pewtercity-citizen · 7 years

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So You Wanna Punch Nazis? Here’s a 3-Step Guide

Let’s all be realistic with how the world is doing: It sucks. Sure, we are getting our advancements here and there, and some progress in other areas. But, telling by the fact the world “Nazi” has been thrown into this article within the first five words, the chances are that there’s a good— and depressing— reason for that.

Recently, there’s a video going around of an unknown man absolutely clocking the shit out of Neo-Nazi Richard Spencer. If that sounds funny to you, it gets better, because you can see it for yourself right here. But wait, there’s more! As if the insatiable fist of justice wasn’t sated enough, Neo-Nazi Spencer was then punched a second time. Pretty soon, the man is going to have to wear a motorcycle helmet and a mouth guard just to mow his lawn.

And so, the “Punch a Nazi” movement has been given the highest honor of recognition: memes.

To be fair, punching a Nazi feels pretty damn good. I’ve never done it, but it must if everyone wants to do it. After all, they’re Nazis. But now, I’m gonna bring up that guide I mentioned in the title. I’m sorry to say that it’s not a “how-to” guide on how to punch a Nazi. If you want that guide, here’s the video again. No, this is a guide to the preparation of the action, namely, the mental preparation. Yes, you have to mentally prepare yourself to assault someone— anyone— even if they’re a Nazi. “Are you saying Nazis deserve sympathy?!” No, it just bring me to my first point…

1. Make Sure They’re Really a Nazi

Neo-Nazi Richard Spencer has truly spoiled us. A real-life Nazi! Wowzers! Right out in the open just waiting for the ol’ one-two! For those of you quick to defend Neo-Nazi Spencer, here’s a few helpful documents and videos where he declares his stances. Now, here’s the video of him getting punched again. And here’s a direct quote in jpeg format:

Neo-Nazi Richard Spencer is one of the most clear-cut examples of a modern Nazi. Sure, he’s not a “throw the Jews in camps,” Nazi, but that’s because he’s a Nazi of the modern era. God damn it, he’s the best there is when it comes to a true-to-life bag of garbage. And that’s a big problem.

We can’t expect every person we wanna punch to be on the same wavelength of bigotry as Spencer. And yet, that’s exactly what happens. We look at examples like this, and somewhere else, someone does the same thing to someone less deserving, and it hurts everyone. For example, let’s talk about social justice. In just seeing those two words on the screen, you did one of two things: You smiled happily, or you cringed. “Social Justice” is a big-name term, and that’s a good thing. People in the United States can now have topics like transgender rights, women’s rights, police brutality statistics, and cultural appropriation. All of these are great topics, that are now able to be talked about in the modern age, because people have fought (sometimes died) to put these topics on the table. And now, people want to be a part of that movement of change. However, they do this in ways that are almost laughable terrible.

One example is the University of Ottawa, which had a yoga class cancelled due to “cultural appropriation.” Not even a plea to be cancelled, it was actually, completely banned from the university. While cultural appropriation is an actual problem around the world, banning yoga is akin to also banning karate, aikido, acupuncture, incense, meditation, tarot cards, tea, and then the fork, which is a Chinese invention. When you ban enough things, saying that only a certain culture or person of color can utilize that thing, you then have something else on your hands: segregation. Cultural appropriation is useful to tell your friend Mike that his sombrero and fake mustache he bought for Halloween makes him look like a racist tool, or for telling an entire football team that their name is one, big racist dick move. Even if your intention is good, you need to make sure your target is deserving of it.

Now apply this to violence.

Violence adds another layer to this process, being that it comes from anger. Quickly— how many of you have ever gone into a blind rage and never regretted it? I’m guessing very few of you. Anger is a dark room, and every shadow is an enemy to us. Not everyone wants to deal with it either, because hell, even scientist know that anger feels good. But feeling good doesn’t mean it’s right, and not enough people want to work past their anger enough to make a thoughtful decision. So, while you may hear someone on the street say, “I don’t get this whole, ‘Black Lives Matter,’ thing,” you’ve got a few options to analyze the situation and come to a few possible conclusions. Or, you could just call them a Nazi, and scratch that face-punch itch, despite the fact that it could lead to something worse. “How,” you ask?

2. Understand Your Actions May Have Consequences

“But, I’m just punchin’ Nazis!” You say. “What could be bad about that?!” You’d be shocked.

There’s a lot of ways things can go when your fist connects to anyone in the name of freedom. First, understand that your punch can lead to a Nazi punching someone else in retaliation. Not your fault? Doesn’t matter. The moment you justify violence for a purpose you deem “right,” another person somewhere is going to apply the logic to a different situation. Hell, this is how war works. Do you think that anyone we’ve ever been to war with has thought, “Man, I’m gonna get those freedom-loving American sissies! I love being a villain!” No, they’re just another army doing exactly what they’re told just like our army does. We’re so good at justifying our own violence that we’ll make movies about how slaughtering troops from other nations made our troops sad.

But, that still makes Nazis wrong. Just because they don’t see themselves as doing anything wrong doesn’t mean they’re not. Is that confusing? You bet your ass it is, and I’m bringing it up because it’s a piece of knowledge you need to have once you see major Nazi-fueled acts of violence because of actions like the ones against Richard Spencer. And in this case, Nazis aren’t your only problems. The people on your side are going to drive you up the fucking wall.

You know how I mentioned that you need to make sure you’re target it in the wrong before you attack them? Well, coupled now with this point, and you have the four individuals who tortured a kid on Facebook Live. It was the actions of four African-American teens (whose names I omit because I’ll always omit the names of actual fucking monsters), who tortured a disabled white teen (whose name I will also omit because he’s probably sick of hear about himself), all while screaming things like, “Fuck Donald Drumpf,” and “Fuck white people!” We look at those things, and we say “That’s not our movement, they’re outliers,” or, “That doesn’t count.” Understanding that people like this exist counts for a lot. People all across the United States have been on the Fuck Donald Drumpf Express, and I will continue to ride that train into the sunset. And then, we have tension between white people and people of color, which is also reasonably justified. But now you’ve taking on two justifiable causes, and someone dumber than you saw that and said, “yeah, I’ll just find some white kid and torture him, that’s the same thing.”

It bears repeating that still doesn’t mean you shouldn’t throw that punch. It just means that, when you do, know the possibility of what it could lead to. It makes that punch worth a whole lot more, and that reminds me…

3. Take Responsibility

I am not telling you to out yourself. I am honestly hoping that the two individuals who decked Richard Spencer stay in the wind, just so a horde of Nazis doesn’t come barging down their front door with burning crosses in tow.

So, what does it mean to take responsibility? To put it short, it means you have to own your actions. What does that mean? It means don’t be a wuss, you wuss. When you make the active effort to punch a person in their face, especially in the current political climate, you need to be ready to take on what that means for you. If you punch someone— a Nazi or otherwise— they could find you. You might not because to hide yourself as well as Richard Spencer’s assailants, and that means getting caught. You could go to jail, and if you’re either gay or a person of color, that means it’s going to suck a lot more for you than it would normally.

We all like to think that it doesn’t end that way. It’s fun to think about winding ‘em up and clobbering Nazis until this bad time blows over. But, your story could end with you behind bars, only hearing about the good fight from the inside of a cell, and worst of all? You’ve only gotten to punch one measly Nazi.

And you know what? It’s not all bad. People go to jail for worse, and the willingness to do something criminal doesn’t make you a bad person. You know who else has been to jail?

That’s Martin Luther King Jr. Yes, that Martin Luther King Jr. Labelled as a criminal by the people of his time, and he helped usher a new wave of tolerance and understanding to future generations. The man would stand on a podium and talk about the future he saw, and how he would never lose sight of that. That’s called responsibility. The man knew full and well that his life was in danger everywhere he went, and that violence was waiting around the corner for him. He knew this, and fought anyway. And you know what happened? He died for it.

No, you don’t have to be the next Martin Luther King Jr. Hell, you really shouldn’t want that for your own life. You don’t have to be in the same spotlight— looking around corner and watching your own back in the grocery store— but you do have to take responsibility for what your actions may bring. You know who else was incarcerated at some point in time? Georgia Congressman John Lewis.

He’s still alive. He’s even on Twitter, tweeting about it! So you could die, you could get tossed in jail, or you could become Georgia’s next congressman. Either way, fighting for freedom has a price to pay, and you’d better be willing to pay it with a smile on your face.

To summarize: Do you think any target you disagree with on any and all moral levels is a Nazi, or is probably a Nazi? If so, you’re not ready to start punching people. Do you think nothing bad will happen if you punch anybody, even a Nazi? If so, you’re not ready to start punching people. Do you think there’s no actual consequence or responsibility that comes with fighting for a cause? If so, you’re not ready to start punching people.

But! Are you ready to accept that while you may disagree with someone, that doesn’t make them a Nazi, or even a racist, and that a punch isn’t a solution to everything? Do you know that there may be consequences to your actions, even if you’ve done nothing wrong? Do you accept the responsibility that comes with your actions, whether it’s jail time, assault towards you, and continue to speak up and speak out against intolerance and, yes, Nazis? If you answered yes to all of these, congratulations: You’re ready to punch yourself some goddamn Nazis.

Here’s that video again for reference. Be safe!

(Brad Kincaide, 2017)

#Nazis #alt right #Captain America #The OG of Nazi Punching #politics #donald trump #richard spencer #nazi punching #punching nazis #whichever one really it's all good #civil rights #article #america #united states #Brad Kincaide

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blainemoriarty · 7 years

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Hi! I'd like to try rping with you but the rules/bio pages are incompatibke with either my phone or my my app. Would you be a dear and copy/paste them here so I can know if we are rp compatible please? Much appreciated! @cameron-allen

Of course!! Sorry about that–

** Also, if you have any other questions regarding either my rules or Blaine’s storyline, feel free to ask!

Rules

Just some basic stuff:

Blaine is gay. I will not ship him with women, or put him in any sexual/romantic situation with a woman (unless we discussed something otherwise). Don’t let that scare you off from plotting with me, though! I’m more than happy to roleplay with female muses, and even if they are in to him, that could make for an incredibly interesting plot. Blaine just won’t be attracted to them in return.

This is a semi-selective roleplay blog. I reserve the right to choose who I roleplay with and when I answer.

I’m open to roleplay with OCs or characters from different fandoms. This is a crossover account, after all, and Blaine is so out-of-character that he might as well be an OC himself.

I’m not very picky with who I ship Blaine with, when it comes to male characters. The relationships themselves can be as unhealthy and toxic as you please. Also, age-differences are irrelevant.

NSFW will be tagged. I’ll do my best to tag triggers, as well, but please let me know if I miss anything.

Blaine is a male prostitute. This should be a trigger warning in itself, I think.

Both the mun and muse are of legal age. I will roleplay with underage muns, but I would rather not roleplay smut with you if you are under eighteen. The reason for this should be clear enough.

I’m fine with doing threads in which our muses already know each other. I know how awkward it can be when you send an ask that’s replied to with “Who on earth are you?” That won’t happen here. Unless you wanted to.

The mun reserves her literacy for threads, for the most part. If we chat ooc (which would be awesome) be warned that I tend tO TALK TO U IN ALL CAPS LIKE THIS !!!

I tend to post a lot ooc, since this is my only platform to do so, and also may reblog stuff that isn’t particularly relevant to my muse. Please respect that. All of my ooc stuff will be tagged if it bothers you, and if I share anything that you find triggering or just don’t like, simply shoot me an ask and I’ll tag it for you so you can blacklist it. Easy-peasy.

I will automatically attempt to turn answered memes into threads, whether I’m the one who answered them or you are. Keep this in mind! If you don’t want something to be turned into a thread for whatever reason, don’t be afraid to let me know!

I don’t use small or formatted text in my replies, because that’s a lot of work (especially since I’m on mobile most of the time) and I think that the quality of the writing itself is much more important than how pretty it looks. So naturally, the same standards apply to my partners. Format your replies however you like, or don’t format them at all - I’m much more concerned about the content itself.

Icons are very rarely used on my part - mostly because I don’t have many and I’m on mobile most of the time. If you want to use icons, that’s fine - let me know when you send an ask. If you answer my ask using an icon, or tag me in a starter using an icon, then most of the time I will wait until I have access to a computer to reply. That means the time between my replies will be longer. Rarely, I might reply to an icon thread without an icon, in which case I will try to make up for it by writing oodles of text. This is either because I’ve been on mobile for a while and am anxious about making you wait, or have a lot of muse for that thread and want to reply already!

About

Name: Blaine Anderson

Age: 24

Place of Birth: Ohio, USA

Current Residence: London, U.K

Sexual Orientation: Gay

Occupation: Male prostitute

Family: Daniel Anderson (Father, deceased), Gabrielle Anderson (Mother, deceased), Cooper Anderson (brother, estranged)

And now…

Daniel Anderson was the youngest of six children born into a wealthy Irish family, moved to the United States in his twenties to set up his own life and escape the suffocating atmosphere of his old household (while still making use of his share of his parent’s money, of course). He was a very devoted Catholic, and wrote mystery novels with his free time - they never did make it to publication. He came across as cold and unapproachable, caused both by his own, personal, emotional issues, and a deep, internalized idea of what a man should be that was far heavier than the weight of the Anderson family’s legacy. He married young, to the youngest daughter of another rich family, Amara Canton. They didn’t like each other at all, despite having a son together, and argued constantly until they finally divorced. Daniel met his second and last wife about a year later, and together they had another child.

Gabrielle Mendoza was a third generation Filipino-Americam who had music running through her veins. She had the voice of an angel, and taught Blaine every instrument he knows how to play. She met Blaine’s father when she was twenty-seven and he was thirty-four; he’d recently divorced a woman whom he’d married solely for his family’s benefit and with whom he already had a five year old son, Cooper. Daniel fell in love with Gabrielle almost immediately. She was unconditionally kind and caring, even when Daniel seemed stiff and cold. She did what no other person had ever managed to do for him - she made him softer.

They were married in little less than a year of meeting each other, and Blaine was born within another.

Blaine was born on April 15th, 1992. His mother had always described him as ‘a tiny man with big dreams’ - tiny, meaning a five year old boy in a ridiculous bow-tie, dancing with his mom in the warm sitting room that served as their ballroom. Music was always something that he loved, and came as naturally to him as breathing. Of course, his father had certain opinions about his son’s passion, but Gabrielle would never let him rob Blaine of the one thing in the world that never failed to make him happy. (Besides, his father loved seeing him that way)

Trouble came to Blaine in the form of his brother. Cooper didn’t like Blaine, and he despised Gabrielle. He even held a particular distaste toward their shared father, a remarkable amount of anger for a ten year old boy. The adults tried not to take it personally, and blamed it on grief - his mother had died, after all, not long after divorcing his father. It was understandable that he would be bitter over someone else’s happiness during such a dark part of his life. Blaine, however, couldn’t have understood that, and couldn’t help but think that he’d - at three years old - done something horribly wrong to ruin Cooper’s life.

It wasn’t difficult to see why Blaine would believe such a thing. Cooper was mean - he was unjustly cruel and clever enough to disguise it. He bullied Blaine in secret for most of their young lives, knowing exactly how to manipulate his little brother into believing that it wasn’t really bullying, Cooper was just teaching him a lesson, Cooper was just making him a stronger person, Cooper was just punishing him for messing up that one dance move that he should’ve gotten right on the first try-

Blaine quickly began to hold resentment toward something that he’d once been passionate about. Nothing he did seemed to be right, or good enough, and the stressful need to be perfect trumped his enjoyment. Pleasure had turned into a source of distress - and it would stay that way for a long time.

There was a short period of freedom when Cooper went off to college - if it could be called freedom. The derogatory thoughts about himself that had been drilled into him still haunted Blaine, but he could focus his perfectionism on other things, now. With Cooper out of the picture, at least, Blaine had some control over his own life.

That all ended once Blaine turned fifteen and Cooper returned home. Blaine was at the peak of puberty and his body had a mind of it’s own. Cooper, being the kind of person that he was, took advantage of this. Blaine saw it as Cooper finally liking him - or, hopefully, loving him. For Blaine, the unhealthy charade between them was him finally being accepted and wanted by his big brother.

For Cooper, it was the perfect way to hurt his little brother.

Their ‘relationship’ was a one-sided attraction laced with manipulation and abuse - both physical and emotional. Cooper hated Blaine; in his eyes, Blaine was symbolic of everything that had ever gone wrong in his life, and the perfect means-to-an-end of his lifelong, misguided quest for vengeance.

Very simply, Cooper wanted to hurt Blaine. And that’s exactly what he did.

Blaine’s parents were both murdered a year after Blaine and Cooper’s relationship began. Cooper had left (he was always leaving for extended periods of time, during which Blaine’s mood usually took a turn for the worse. That was probably why) and the next time Blaine saw him, he was standing over their parents’ bodies. He didn’t know it was Cooper, of course. Not until much later on.

After their deaths, Cooper left, and never contacted Blaine again.

Blaine’s last year of high school was a blur. His family’s now-empty house was suffocating him. His country was suffocating him. He needed to get out, and college was his opportunity to do just that. Luckily, his stressful but successful high school career paid off, and he was accepted to a prestigious art school in London. He lasted there for less than two years before dropping out.

Grief was a difficult thing to work with. Mixed with trauma of every shape and size, Blaine was barely able to function at all.

How Moriarty became interested in him, Blaine would never figure out. At the time, he was just a whore. A resourceful whore, who knew how to get what he wanted, but anyone could

Nonetheless, Blaine was contacted on his website (which he still refuses to discuss, because it contains some very old, very exposing photos of his barely nineteen-year old self) by the king of crime, looking for a whore.

Foolishly, Blaine agreed to meet with him.

Surprisingly enough, Blaine wasn’t contacted just to be fucked - at least, not just by Moriarty. He proved himself to be a useful tool when it came to getting information out of people, without the mess that forcing it out of them would result in.

But why had he chosen Blaine? There were plenty of other sex workers throughout London, more talented and popular and charming than he was…

Inevitably, Blaine stopped torturing himself over such things. Instead, he did something even worse to himself - he fell in love.

Jim Moriarty was, arguably, one of the most dangerous men in the world. Falling in love with him was probably the most idiotic thing Blaine had ever done. At the same time, what little seemingly-genuine affection that was given to him was also more than anything he’d ever experienced before. Perhaps it was all part of Moriarty’s ‘plan’, or maybe it was his own mistake (doubtfully), or maybe he the feelings he showed were genuine (even less likely), but whatever it was, it worked. Blaine was hooked.

Of course, that meant he was loyal to a fault. Especially since, alongside his romantic feelings, Blaine had quite a bit of fear. Once again, Moriarty was one of the most dangerous people in the world, and his violent outbursts made no exceptions for Blaine if he was irritated or not.

Whatever there was between them, it was made very clear that Blaine was expendable.

That was no surprise.

Aaaand also a crap ton of demon!Blaine stuff in case he interests you as well–

Incubi (Mun’s Interpretation):

Succubi and incubi are demons that feed off of orgasmic energy, created soley to please other demons, although it isn’t uncommon for them to feed off of humans as well. It’s rumored that the first succubae and incubi were fallen angels or nephilim, but only the more superstitious of the bunch (like Blaine) believe in this.

According to most sources, any succubus demon is also an incubus demon, and vice versa. Their title depends strictly on which gender they present as. An incubus demon would only “become” a succubus demon if they wanted to reproduce (which, thanks to handy demonologists like Sebastien Michaelis, I get to give you a ridiculously detailed step-by-step guide for.) In their succubus form, they would “collect” (ewugh) a human man’s sperm, and in their incubus form would “transfer” that sperm to a human female and impregnate her. Most sources agree with this, although a few mention that an incubus and succubus can also have a child together. Either way, the child produced is called a Cambion. There’s not much information on them, so let’s just say that they’re baby demons that later become either an inbcubus or succubus, determining their presenting gender once they’re of age and their “powers” appear.

Since incubi are also sometimes referred to as ‘fauns’, their demonic forms most likely have goat or deer aspects, such as horns or antlers, and equine legs. Rarely, they may also take the form of a ball of light (very similar to a will o’ the wisp). This only happens if an incubus desperately needs to burn off extra energy or needs to lure in new sources of it, and not all incubi know how to assume this form. Blaine doesn’t.

Sex demons feed off of the sexual energy of other people, but they don’t need to orgasm in order to feed. The process doesn’t harm other demons, but can harm humans, but this heavily depends on the demon that is feeding off of them. More powerful demons can feed off of humans in their dreams, but this is a rare talent.

An incubus’ body or form changes depending on how much energy they’ve consumed. As mentioned earlier, some can turn into a ball of light, but the body of every incubus and succubus has its temperature change. To put it simply, an excess of energy makes their body cold, while a lack of it makes their body warm, in order to be either alluring or repelling. If an incubus has too much or too little energy, their bodies can turn into dust, and they die. The obvious solution to a lack of energy is by feeding off of someone’s energy, but to cope with too much of it, most incubi will find another incubus or succubus to have sex with. Since they can’t produce energy on their own, feeding off of each others acquired energy evens everything out. This would suck if two of them wanted to be in a relationship, but their biological needs make monogamy nearly impossible, and none of them really have a desire for that kind of relationship. Often, outside of the harems kept by Hell’s royalty, incubi and succubae prefer polyamorous relationships instead.

Blaine:

Blaine presents primarily as an incubus, and rarely takes on his succubus form. He doesn’t really need or want to (he has no desire to reproduce, at all). He’s not the most powerful incubus, but he does have more status than some of the strongest, since he’s got two masters, one of which is the king of Hell (not necessarily Supernatural’s Crowley, but it can be) and another who is stronger than all of Hell’s heirarchy put together (my confusing au Jim Moriarty).

Blaine was born as a Cambion, the offspring of an unknown demon parent and his unknowing human mother, Gabrielle. He was raised as a boy because of mankind’s gender-binary thing (this is the case with a lot of Cambion children), and that stuck with him even after he discovered that he was a demon, when he turned eighteen and Moriarty sought after him. That was a long time ago, and he’s still very comfortable in his incubus form. In a way, he got lucky.

Despite his weakness as a demon, Blaine is still much stronger than any human, and smarter than most demons, which makes him an excellent spy. That’s the purpose he serves for Moriarty, who he considers his true master, and he’s unconditionally loyal. Blaine practically worships him, despite not being able to be intimate with him, since his power is so much that Blaine would turn into dust by even being too close to him during sex. As for Crowley, Blaine doesn’t mind him much, even if he feigns dislike towards him to please his true master; he’s not a terrible owner. A bit sadistic, unsurprisingly, but not terrible. (Or maybe Blaine is just very easily wooed)

#(( i put it under a cut because... its a lot of stuff #hope this isnt too overwhelming! ))#cameron-allen

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