#LOOKING AT THIS MAKES MY HEART ACHE | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

giadenaa · 4 months

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Nico and Libby from the atlas six ⭐️

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mikimeiko · 6 months

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Kyle Soller as Alfred Hillinghead in Bodies

#bodies #bodies netflix #bodiesedit #alfred hillinghead #kyle soller #completely captivated by this pale sad homosexual #he looks like he's about to burst into tears 99% of the time #he makes my heart ache and i love him forever #and when they put him in that suit that perfectly matches his eyes? AH #also wtf kyle soller #i mean i knew he was good in andor #but the sheer level of repressed emotionality he manages to express in every. single. scene.#wow #i made this #i just want a tag for the things i personally put out into the world

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blobpsycho · 7 months

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This gif perfectly encapsulates what I love about Tome. All girls have been this gif. Like remember having undiagnosed mental issues and your family makes you go on an outing that should be fun but you’re just pissed off constantly because youre a 14 year old girl? Tome gets it.

Like YOU’RE GOING SOMEWHERE TO DO SOMETHING THAT SPECIFICALLY PERTAINS TO YOUR INTERESTS. But youre a 14 year old girl and nobody will ever take you seriously and you’ve just got this pit of hopelessness in your stomach despite the fact that nothing is technically wrong

so even though youre on an outing planned for you you can’t shake the feeling that everyone is just making fun of you for being so upset over seemingly nothing. These are your friends and family, you deep down they wouldnt do that, but why else would they go out of their way?

They certainly wouldn’t do it for you, right? I mean nothing’s even technically wrong. You’re just being a crybaby and they all must think youre just being a dramatic teenage girl. And you are and you know that you are so why can’t you just get over it and be normal?

And when you finally can’t take the pain that’s screaming in your chest because everything feels wrong wrong and everything is going wrong and everything is wrong wrong wrong you can’t help but cry. And you’re embarrassed and you’re furious and you’re supposed to be mature and you’re supposed to not care but you cry.

Crying feels worse than the growing internal discomfort did because now everyone is looking at you. They’re staring in uncomfortable suprise at what you’re sure is the most unsuprising sight in the world - a 14 year old girl crying. You want to go home but you can’t. You’re 14. You can’t do anything on your own.

You react to the terrifying ordeal of being reacted to the only way you know how - with anger. You monologue through hot tears and sobs and snot how you didn’t even wanna be here and how you just *know* everyone is just doing this to make fun of you and how they should just go on ahead and leave you wherever you are (you know this can’t happen. They wouldn’t leave a 14 year old girl somewhere unfamiliar on her own) and something in you hopes that they’ll yell back, that they’ll treat you like you’re irrational and make you feel justified in your anger.

…But that doesn’t happen. The silence persists but you realize that it’s more contemplative than judgemental. They’re not afraid of you, though you think they should be. Rather than letting them say something sentimental about caring and being concerned or any sappy bullshit that will only serve to make you cry more, you wipe your face on your sleeve continue on your journey.

The day gets better. After everyone gathers that no, you don’t wanna talk about it, it almost feels like nothing happened to begin with- besides the slight exhaustion you feel every time you blink and the intense stress sweat you choose to blame on anything else.

By the time you get home, the day is mentally logged as a good day. You decide - albeit tentatively - that maybe you’re going to be ok. Maybe you won’t be a 14 year old girl forever.

You go to bed and have the best sleep you’ve had in months.

#mp100 #tome kurata #ramblings #free to rb #though I’m sure nobody will LOL this is not anything #i didnt even mean to write all that #tome just brings out everything in me #like i see her and its like looking at me when i was in middle school #sorry if this is stupid i am not a writer #i genuinely hate writing so I’m suprised this exists #everything about here makes my heart ache with familiarity and love #mob psycho 100 #tome mob psycho #something about being 14 #being a 14 year old audhd unpopular girl who has yet to find out shes a lesbian is something tome could do in her sleep #and i salute her for that bc i also did that once #idgaf about the military they have nothing on being a 14 year old girl

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inkyboyo · 10 months

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“my first year back into smosh, i was..so fucked up like i.. i guess it was to the point that like, on multiple occasions, people would just walk up to me and be like, ‘hey, are you okay?’”

“were you just dissociated?”

“yeah..”

WHAT IF I FUCKING CRIED AND SCREAMED AND PUT MYBHEAD THROUGH A WALL!!!!????

#ian hecox we all love you #you deserve so much #that first year god #i just KNOW how he felt #to be that fucked up #my heart is ACHING for him when it comes to that #it makes me so glad that theyre healing together tho #like omfg it came around and their FIRST SKETCH IS GONNA GO UP TOMORROW FUCJ #look at how far theyve come #i’m so ☹️☹️☹️#GOD I LOVE THEM SO MUCH #i’m gonna throw up #ianthony #anthony padilla #ian hecox #smosh

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honkygay · 11 months

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sobs and sniffles,,, uhm,,, them.

#honkygaydraws #pjo #pjo fanart #nico di angelo #will solace #solangelo #the sun and the star #tsats #i used to look up to nico so much #to see him healing pried my ribs open and let me see my own heart #and it cradled it softly and placed it back in my chest #it ACHES.#m so happy for both of them theyre PERFECT for eachother #nico helps will see that death isnt the end #it isnt all that bad #and will helps nico see that people arent all that bad #losing one person isnt the end #they make me ACHE.

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mintedwitcher · 5 months

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y'know what now that we've canonically established that Fourteen is more emotionally open than Ten ever was can we PLEASE get him talking about the Master, and getting more than just "we were friends at first" like PLEASE.

we now have a Doctor who has experienced two (technically three, silver beard!Simm my beloved) other regenerations of the Master: Twelve with Missy (so sad Missy never actually met Eleven on screen because oh god the CHAOS would've been PERFECT), and Thirteen with SpyMaster. Two very very different versions of the Master with very very different motivations and impacts on the Doctor and I want him to talk about it goddamnit!

I would love to have the Master return in the specials, I really would, but barring that possibility, I just want to see Fourteen actually talk about who the Master is to him.

#doctor who #thoschei #fourteenth doctor #the master #look Ten never got to Actually talk about the Master bc everyone he tried talking TO was like 'uh ew he's the Bad Guy'#even when he was Literally in Mourning #and just once JUST ONCE i want to have him be able to talk about the Master openly #i want more than just 'we were friends at first'#like that was wonderful and the WAY Ten delivered that line makes my heart ache #but I want MORE #like please just. just give me that #if i cant have the master returning in the specials just give me that

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obihoe · 1 month

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aughhhh, he is literally so babygirl to me ..

#posts #😔 i luv him ...#was going thru some screenshots last night and immediately sat down and drew this asdfdgds #he looks so baby here ...#and this scene its so touching to me somehow #its when hsrm and him have just founded the village #and theyre planning and talking abt how they will further proceed. and hsrm has all these good news abt how more and more clans #will be joining them #and mdr is. he is sooo ... he is so happy and so content here. and so nice ..#there is also this scene where he helps this girl who they see running around and then fall on her face lol #and mdr gets there and tries helping her .. he is so nice here. and kind ...#there's such a warmth between them u know. mdr seems so warm and so peaceful and content #its the only time during the WHOLE story where u see him like this #bc hsrm and him they are close here ... and he gets this warm feeling from him #and he's full of hope and all asdfgdss #i also think its so cute how they talk to each other here like hsrm suggests the thing w the carving mdr's face in the stone hills #and mdr is like. ummm are u sure lmao like he's so Embarrassed #asfsfdfds #its so cute #and then hsrm is like 'well we'd need to make some adjustments tho cuz ur face looks kind of brutal' asfsfdfds #and he Winks at him as he says it! aughh. its like literally they are flirting here #also mdr going 'well at least im not Moping around all the time like u do. my face is still better than urs' asddfdfds #its so aughhh u can just feel the affection between them ... it makes my heart ache #madara #hsmd

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jmdbjk · 1 year

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The angel chariot

Eagle-eye Army spotted the fact that Jungkook's company car that whisked him away from Incheon airport upon his arrival from Los Angeles was the same one that Jimin used this past December for his comings and goings to the airport. Same license plate. [First 4 numerals/characters obscured to protect the innocent and cover my ass. Also not providing the link to eagle-eye army in the interest of keeping the imbeciles away from them.]

I tried to spy the license plate of the cars during their other past airport comings and goings but they were moving too fast/obscured by objects or people.

Maybe not Jimin or Jungkook but it was used to carry SOMEONE to Hobi's enlistment:

Of course BigHit has a fleet of these identical black KIA Carnival limousines and who knows if actual vehicles/drivers are assigned to specific members, but it was interesting to see and think about.

However, here is a curious bit of trivia: the number 5469 is supposedly the "angel" number. Various sources describe 5469 as:

well mannered

conscientious

artistic

humanitarian

balanced

harmonious

protective

giving

fair

caring

kind

romantic

nurturing

supportive

And this:

"Looking from a numerology standpoint, the energy emanating from the four-digit number 5469 is a decidedly well mannered energy. It resonates with distinct patterns of compassion and perceptible vibrations of romance. The number also points to an awareness which manifests at a subconscious, empathic level — pointing to an almost empathic synchronization with the emotions and thoughts of society."

I don't make that stuff up, other people do.

Anyway, is there a real significance in coming and going in the same car for their separate activities? Of course not. Like I said, we can't know if it's pure coincidence or if members are assigned specific cars/drivers etc. It was just something someone noticed and I'm passing on this extreme level of delulu to you because I aim to please.

The Jikook hug: the live action "I miss you"/"me too" played out right in front of us.

You can't convince me otherwise that when these two are together on their own time, they are up in each other's space in a way that would make you and me blush uncomfortably. It's the way they look at each other and the way they talk to each other. Yes, Jimin gives the best hugs and right before he dove into Jungkook, he gave Hobi the warmest, tightest "I love you hyung" hug as well ... JK's eyes following Jimin all the way until Hobi receives his hug. Honestly, Jungkook seemed like he was patiently anticipating a hug from Jimin too ... it is the attentiveness or awareness of each other and creates a Jimin and Jungkook aura and adds an extra level to their closeness.

Kookie keeps his eyes on his Jiminie all the time and he seems to enjoy his touching. The way JK pulled Jimin in and held on to him...no matter the level of delulu you subscribe to, their bodies in that full frontal, smushed together, I-MISSED-YOU-COME-HERE-BABY-I-LOVE-YOU hug just makes me really happy for them.

So playful and easy with each other.

Yep, I know what I see. If you can't see it, I'm sorry. I don't know how to transfer that ability to detect it to you. If I could, I would so everyone can feel their love for each other.

Did they miss each other? Absolutely. How long had they been apart? 3 weeks? 3 hours? 3 minutes? What difference does it make?

Who knows, maybe they rode back home to Seoul in the angel chariot XXXX-5469 and spent some quality time together before they separated again for their respective solo activities and whatever those might be, we will find out eventually!

#did i make hobi's enlistment about jikook?#oops #it is a coping mechanism because my heart hurts #so much heartbreak at once #RIP Moonbin he was way too young and beautiful #jikook #kookmin #seeing them smushed together heals my aching heart #their moment of confusion as to who smelled like alcohol though?#disclaimer: anyone can find the videos and look at the plate number

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disposal-blueeee · 10 months

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silly thing i made last night XP

vargas by @zarla-s

#vargas #vargas zarla #edgar vargas #scriabin vargas #zarla s #haiii i'm back :3 #i've been through a bunch of stuff recently #but i think i feel better now :)#my mind has been acting real silly lately #my brain just keeps saying KILL YOURSELF. KILL YOURSEEELF #but nothing new #i just saw this audio on tiktok and i though it fit with them soooo #also i'm now school-free for the next two months #i hope i feel motivated enough to draw something #it's just that my motivation only comes after 10pm #ohhhhh edgar looks so miserable here i want to put him in an air fryer #he just wants to be comforted D:#my heart ached while drawing this #i always make scriabin look unnecessarily pretty #and i HATE IT #BECAUSE HE DOESN'T DESERVE IT #one day i drew them with freckles and now i can't stop .......#my brain !! finally managed !! to think of something not chapter 20/21 or diaryfic related !!! 🥳🥳#this doesn't necessarily have a context??#i was thinking of something like chapter 18 #i struggled so much uploading this for no reason ....#my art style is so inconsistent #but i think it looks okay

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antaripirate · 4 months

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i award this trophy to Casero Delilah Bard

#i’m rereading Threads and oh my god #she is so fucking in love #the fact that lila bard CANONICALLY cannot sleep without her ginger idiot beside her makes me feel so many things #and her no telling her about the new antari in white london bc ‘he has enough to worry about’#and the way her fingers ‘ache to heal him’#and the way she’s always running her fingers through his hair #and the way his scream ‘tore through her’#and the way she can read him so well and always just wants him to be ok #and she shows him that he is never weak #and she’s always looking to a way to stop him hurting and fix what’s broken #and she is always always always thinking of him and doing anything to protect him #my heart is so happy and it hurts so much #the fragile threads of power #adsom #a darker shade of magic #shades of magic #kell maresh #lila bard #kellila #threads of power

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apk02 · 2 years

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Arthur was not as oblivious as everyone thought he was. He obviously knew there was something different about Merlin. And there were times when he directly asked Merlin about what had happened. But he never really knew for sure about Merlin's magic because he expected Merlin to be completely honest with him. So even if he did suspect magic he didn't believe it because he was sure Merlin was always completely honest with him.

And this in no way means Merlin should've told Arthur. But I do think Merlin did try to tell Arthur in a roundabout way. Obviously earlier on when he was going to tell him upfront like in Ealdor. But also, later on when he tells Arthur about the many times he saves his arse and stuff like that. Merlin wanted to be honest and while I truly believe Arthur would've changed the entire law for Merlin, I don't think Merlin himself believed his worth to be enough in Arthur's eyes. And that's where the biggest tragedy began, ladies and gentlemen.

#bbc merlin #merlin #arthur pendragon #merthur #look at me as i break my heart again #i think the only reason i think about these two so much is because things could have been so different #but they were still so beautiful #they make my heart ache

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idontwanttospoiltheparty · 2 years

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"I remember a time when everyone I loved hated me because I hated them. So what, so what, so fucking what. I remember a time when belly buttons were knee high When only shitting was dirty and everything else clean and beautiful. I can't remember anything without a sadness so deep that it hardly becomes known to me. so deep that its tears leave me a spectator of my own STUPIDITY And so I go rambling on with a hey nonny nonny no. How long can one go on writing and writing like you. I now don't really know who I'm writing to or why its quiet [sic] peculiar. I usually write like this and forget about it, but if I post it it's like a little part of my almost secret self in the hands of someone miles away who will wonder what the hell is going on or just pass it off as toilet paper. Anyway I don't care really what happens because when I think about it, its so bloody unimportant – but what is important, who has the right to say that this letter is not important and Jesus is a something anyway – in any way – anyway – Yeah! I wonder what it would be like to be a cretin or something. I bet its great. Er how are you keeping, Stuart old chap. Are you OK – is life good – bad, shite, great – wonderful as it was or is it just a thousand years of nothing, and coalmen on and on and on. I think this is it Goodbye Stu don't write out of – er, what's it? Well, not because you think you ought to. Write when you feel like. So goodbye (from John. You know, the one with glasses) ANYWAY BYE BYE See you soon. I don't know why I said that."

– An unsent letter from John Lennon for Stuart Sutcliffe (1961)

#i couldnt find the entire letter in a post so here it is because i need to go insane quickly #1) his thing where he emulates people he loves & he literally admits to it here but gives up because Stu's writing style tires him out :(#2) “my almost secret self” and that entire bit about sending off a bit of himself into the world is SO REAL #(I really think Stu becoming his pen pal he never had to see allowed John to let his guard down in a way he couldn't with people IRL #in the same way it can be easier to open up online nowadays)#3) “You know the one with glasses” I LOVE HIM!!!!!!!!!#4) the jokey deflection from his genuine sadness when he calls Stu “old chap”#5) spiralling through his own thoughts and ending with “– Yeah!” hes a tumblrina fr #6) it makes my heart ache that I'm pretty sure the phrase he was looking for was “a sense of obligation” and I wanna tell him :(#7) the “See you soon. I don't know why I said that.” is haunting when I'm pretty sure he never saw Stu again.#ref #john #fiona.docx #61 #sjw

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kitsunabi · 8 months

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I keep reading the lore and like I am absolutely doubling down on the idea that DF in the animation is 100% not the actual personality of DF. It contradicts like all the lore we’ve received of him.

It is 100% a representation of DH’s personal fears and viewpoints as shaped by his time in the Shackling Prison and skewed perspective from the ones who inundated him with the knowledge of the crimes of his predecessor

#honkai star rail #Dan heng #dan Feng #also… ppl literally operate in consistent traceable manners #1/4 of my job is reading ppl it just doesn’t track #DF grasped so hard at the quintet like???? it makes no sense if you read ILDH’s dreams/chara lore #if he was truly about passing on punishment and adhereing to the cycles why TF would he not have told the preceptors #where the heart was??? in the face of a death sentence? he literally got off bc they couldn’t agree to kill him #if he’s so about the rules then what’s up with his relationship with yingxing? any mortal emotion is a threat to duty #-he felt a sliver of hubris and quickly looked at the people he shared wine with huh?#to …. idk…. remind him that he’s not all about the duty???? maybeeee?????#his mortal heart aches for the ones who could not return home eh?????#I am not quoting lore for NOTHING HERE #when my interest and memory collide I have RECEIPTS

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pedro-pedrito-pascalito · 1 year

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idk why but pedro pascal has the most beautiful eyes i have ever seen and i think about that alot.

I always said i‘d prefer blue, green or grey eyes since they are more colorful and i thought more expressive but damn was i wrong!! he has just completely changed that.

He has such warm, sincere, kind eyes that immediately give me a sense of security and love. I am sure pedro is the definition of the very word itself. But then there is also a sadness in them man i wanna know who hurt this man so i can hurt them you know what i mean

#his eyes are the source of love and adoration laces with a sadness that makes my heart ache for him #idk it is just what i feel deep down when i look into his beautiful orbs #pedro pascal #brown eyes #his nickname is brown eyes baby #jose pedro balmaceda pascal #text

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elegyofthemoon · 1 month

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well. i finished ch 17 of hi3. but at what cost

#avil plays hi3 #tbf majority of me playing through hi3 just looks like This.#yes the acheron trailer made me get up and finish ch 17 #i. :(#the fight between kiana and mei was so painful :(#ok also i suck ass in the combat and i was so scared of having to restart #BUT I THINK I HURT MORE THE FACT THAT KIANA JUST REFUSED TO GIVE UP ON MEI #BUT MEIS ALSO DOING THIS BECAUSE SHES TRYING TO SAVE KIANA #AND THEY WERE BOTH FIGHTING TO STOP AND TRY TO SAVE EACH OTHER #MEI YOU SAVED KIANA BUT LIKE..... DONT YOU WANT TO LIVE ALONGSIDE HER.... MEI PLEASE #tbh. the way i was going through ch 17 for hi3.#kiana and mei remind me a lot of oz and gil's relationship back in pandora hearts but #now it makes me want to hit my head on a brick wall because #'wow. i really just gravitate tO THE SAME FUCKING MEDIA EVERY DAMN TIME AVIL STOP IT FFS'#also idk i was thinking about it too #mei tried earlier to use the herrschers powers to try and protect kiana but it wasnt enough. she failed that time #and with no other option to save her she just HAD to and it makes me HURT that this was her only option #IN HER HEAD. I BELIEVE IN YOU MEI I THINK THERE COULDVE BEEN ANOTHER OPTION HERE (IDK WHAT BUT I AM SOBBING)#sprawls on the ground #at least i can have an emotional break for a little bit.... hsr update so i can chill w that #and then when i finish catching up w that. then i go back to being hi3's punching bag #can i get off this train now? why'd i sign myself up for this (welt yang doomed me and then i got fucked over by everything else)#idk also the way that both mei AND kiana resorted to using their herrscher powers to stop the other. two stubborn people....#but its done because they just... they just care so much and want to save the other #okay yeah we did beat each other up about it bUT STILL #MEI I BELIEVE IN YOU YOU CAN TURN THIS AROUND 😭😭😭😭😭#anyways. glad i did. i have the worst stomach ache rn so i was Going through it #but my brain hit a reset so i feel normal now. save for the crying

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vanyafresita · 1 month

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i love you postcards with sweet messages in ugly handwriting, i love you magazine cuts with poetry written at the back, i love you stickers bent at the edges, i love you letters with pen smudges, i love you cute doodles on envelopes

#i opened my stationary box and looking at all the postcards and letters ive been given by friends makes me so emotional #ive received a few postcards every year since 2016 from irl friends as well as online friends and im gonna cryyyy i love my friends so much #proof i exist proof that im loved that ive been loved for however long in the past #one of my biggest treasures is a postcard of nu pogodi that my polish roommate bought during a trip to ukraine in 2019 #she bought it at a secondhand shop and you can tell this postcard is from the 80/90s it makes my heart ACHE im love it sm #also i love these cute tiny magazine cutd a friend from hungary send with lyrics and poetry she likes #I LOVE YOU FRIENDS I SPEAK TO CURRENTLY AND FRIENDS I DONT SPEAK TO ANYMORE AND PEOPLE THAT I BARELY HAD A CHANCE TO TALK TO BUT THAT-#CONNECTED WITH ME FOR A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME !! YOURE ALL SO DEAR TO ME I LOVE EVERYBODY SOOO MUCH #okay enough being sentimental back to looking for cute postcards #vanya strawberry flavored

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