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bluedillylee · 1 year

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Yennefer helps Jaskier get reunited with his terrible cat at kaer morhen. Jaskier’s semi-feral cat only allows Jaskier to pet him but he will sit next to yennefer’s feet and does allow ciri to to play with him.

The witchers on the other hand live in terror of surprise ankle attacks

#the witcher #witcher netflix #jaskier #Yennefer of Vengerberg #Jaskier adopts a cat #ciri #geralt #coen #lambert #vesemir

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lassieposting · 1 year

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anyway jaskier is like. basically the human equivalent of those wild animals someone feeds who've lost all fear of people and now just break into houses to eat out of the trash and chill in the pool

he's been travelling with a witcher since he was 18. he has zero fear of any of them. he associates witchers with Having Things Done For Him and Being Provided For and Give Love. he has no reservations whatsoever about going up to any random witcher he happens to pass when geralt isn't around and asking them to help him with something or do something for him or just. trailing after them for a while because he knows if he whines perfectly on pitch they'll hunt his dinner and store his shit in their horse's saddlebags and keep him safe on the road, even if they're grumpy about it. at kaer morhen he is like the stray cat geralt fed one time and now everyone is just like "well he lives here now i guess". it just Does Not Occur to him that he might ever be in danger with a witcher around. this is a man who finds things lying around in the kaer morhen lab and just fucking. eats them

anyway. those "please do not feed the animals it teaches them to approach people" signs but. for jaskier and the oxenfurt students who start trying to imitate him and adopt a witcher

#the witcher #jaskier #netflix witcher #it's a toss-up between witchers who are like 'ffs geralt this is why we don't encourage human attachments'#and the ones who are like 'it's free bard'#geraskier #witchersexual jaskier

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thedemonofcat · 3 months

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To annoy Geralt, sometimes Jaskier will decide to adopt some random animal. (Cats, Dogs, rabbits, goats, etc). Then proceed to name the animal Geralt.

To make matters worse, in this time period, Jaskier calls the actual Geralt. “Witcher Geralt”

The thing both Ciri and Yennefer call him “Witcher Geralt.”

After a few days, the animal is usually given to a nice family they meet along the way

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shy-urban-hobbit · 7 months

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When your brain asks 'What if Jaskier made up a certain rhyme for a certain Cat'

Aiden couldn't remember the last time he'd felt this happy and comfortable for longer than the odd day.

Sure, the winters back with Dyn Marv were fine, his family were there afterall. Even so, for all that most of them cared about each other in their own unique ways, they were still Cats with a reputation that hadn't been built on nothing. Catch some of his siblings on a bad day and they were just as likely to stab you as hug you (Aiden had the scars to prove it).

Right now though, he was at Kaer Morhen and today was shaping up to be an exceptionally good one. After somewhat of a shaky start, Vesemir had assigned him unsupervised chores for the first time since his arrival. It had only been preparing lunch, but the fact that the old Wolf now trusted him not to attempt to poison them or anything spoke volumes and Aiden had felt no small amount of pride when Vesemir had even helped himself to a second bowl. A sudden blizzard had meant they were all excused from afternoon training and so had spent the last couple of hours piled up by the fire, talking and napping in turn.

Not being used to the Keeps frigid temperatures (and not being fond of the cold to start with), Aiden had found himself shuffled closest to the fire alongside Jaskier, where he was currently wrapped in one of the furs off his and Lambert's bed, falling into a light doze with his lover at his back and the Bard's fingers - always moving - weaving through his hair as started singing something Aiden didn't recognise.

Soft kitty, warm kitty

Little ball of fur

Happy kitty

Sleepy kitty

Purr, purr, purr

Aiden's eyes snapped open as the others started sniggering, "...What?" He asked deadpan, trying to keep his face and voice neutral as Jaskier's fingers stilled in their petting.

"Fuck, sorry! I do that. You just looked so sweet lying there all curled up and then you started purring, I couldn't resist."

Aiden furrowed his brow slightly. Had he been purring? The others started laughing harder at his confused expression.

"Congratulations, the Bard's officially adopted you. Don't fight it, you won't win." Lambert laughed from behind him, pressing a kiss to the back of his neck while Geralt and Eskel nodded.

"It's true," the scarred Witcher said, pulling the human towards him and arranging him so he was sprawled across both his and Geralt's laps, "He's made up a little ditty for each of us at some point or another. Yours is far cuter than mine." And now Aiden really wanted to know what it was if it was the cause of the faint whiff of embarrassment from the other Witcher and the slightly suggestive eyebrow arch from Jaskier.

Aiden hummed in acknowledgement, taking in Jaskier's expectant (and slightly apprehensive) expression when he turned his attention back to him.

"That is simultaneously the sweetest and most patronising thing anyone's ever done for me." He said freeing an arm from the fur and grasping Jaskier's ankle. "I love it. Although I take slight offence at the 'little ball of fur' thing." He said with a smile and a wink.

"Agree to disagree there." Lambert rumbled from behind him, "I've seen your bed head first thing in the morning."

"I will put dead things on your pillow, Wolf." Aiden said with no bite at all as he settled back down purring even louder than before. Jaskier's little rhyme burrowing its way into his brain and his heart.

#the witcher #the witcher fanfiction #aiden/lambert #aiden x lambert #lambden #lambert/aiden #lambert x aiden #lambert #witcher lambert #witcher aiden #witcher jaskier #jaskier #jaskier/aiden friendship #crack treated seriously

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hellenhighwater · 1 year

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I feel bad because I want you to own Mayhem the Cat but I feel like Vice would become upset.

I have a hard limit of three cats as permanent pets, and I would also have to REALLY be in love to adopt a shorthair. They're lovely, but I'm incredibly partial to longhairs. I just love the floof!

Vice is the reason I don't have a pet snake and also a dog. I've decided I don't want to introduce a new permanent member of the household until he's chilled out substantially. However, he can handle another animal in the house so long as they're not in his space--when the artist formerly known as Two Houses was in the process of coming in from outside, getting checked over and de-flea'd and dewormed, he just lived in the guest bedroom and Mal and Vice were fine with that. (Two Houses was with me, indoors, for about a month. His new family has renamed him Jaskier, because boy does that man sing.) So I think I can get away with fostering kittens so long as they're mostly in one room and Mal and Vice are...not in there. Or at least not there unsupervised.

They'd have to be in one room anyways because there's too many not-pet-safe plants in the rest of the house. Malice and Vice know better than to mess with them but kittens would not be so well-trained.

I do have some qualms about my ability to socialize them as much as they should be, since I am just one person and I do have to be out of the home a lot, but it's probably better than they'd get in the shelter with so many other animals also needing attention. And a good picture goes a long way towards getting a cat adopted, and I am nothing if not a pretty decent cat photographer.

Here he is, tiny emperor of my house of horrors.

#I handle all of the animal abuse and neglect cases that come through our office and i don't mind that #i actually prefer that it's me because i do really care #but also it's nice to see some positive animal care in the community too

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wyrm-mlm · 1 year

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Yooooo I just had an idea for a modern Witcher AU that has latched my brain and won’t let go so I gotta just get it out:

Kaer Mohren Animal Hospital

Geralt, Lambert and Eskel all grew up, adopted by Vesemir and somehow all became Veterinarians. Then they decided to open an animal hospital together

Eskel is usually who you see if you bring in a cat or dog, handling the general practice. He’s kind with animals and people alike, sitting with clients as long as it takes to make sure they understand everything.

Lambert takes care of exotics, the weirder the better to him. If Eskel’s schedule is tight he’ll examine a dog or two but he refuses to work with cats. They hate him, he’s sure.

Geralt is usually on the road, tending to livestock. Horses are his favorite of course, and he has some of his own. When he’s at the clinic he will see dogs and cats too.

Yennifer is the lead Tech. She’s hard on her techs but they all know she does it for the good of the animals. She’s not great with clients.

Triss is basically her right hand and takes over if it’s Yen’s day off. She’s great with people and is usually the one to take scheduled euthanasias. It takes a lot out of her but she pretends it doesn’t effect her.

Letho is the muscle, and usually tags along with Geralt to help restraint with larger animals. He tends to intimidate people in the clinic so he’s happy to stay on the road most the time.

Coen is also the muscle but tends to stay at the clinic as he’s better with people. He can get a mastiff on the surgery table with little help. Though it’s catching up to him and he has chronic back pain. He has a hard time asking for help. Yen tends to scold him for that.

Iorveth runs a wildlife rehabilitation center and often brings in things to Lambert. They have to make sure his appointments are on different days from Roche(who helps Foltest with his show and hunting dogs. Basically a glorified assistant.) or the two will argue for hours in the waiting room if they run into each other.

Jaskier fosters animals constantly (he has a big heart and a deep wallet, what can he say?) so he’s commonly bringing in dogs and cats and the occasional exotic to make sure that they are healthy and can be rehomed. He flirts with everyone. All the time. Also a lot of business comes from people who he refers to the clinic.

Aiden is another tech. He has a way with cats that no one else does. Even clients are surprised. A lot of cat owners ask for him by name because of it.

Gaetan is a kennel tech that wants to become a vet some day. He dreams of opening an all cat hospital and roped Aiden into the idea. Lambert thinks they’re crazy.

Vesemir used to be a large animal vet but now works the books for his boys.

Ciri is Geralt’s god child and dreams of becoming a zoo vet some day and spends most of her time not at school at the clinic with Geralt.

That’s all I got for now, may add to it. If anyone has suggestions or head canons let me know. Also PLEASE if this inspires fanart or fanfics tag me.

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officerjennie · 6 months

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Fluff starter prompt, omg please fkbfjff

“I think I love you.”

Greedy panda noises please 🥺❤️

This fic is dedicated to a sweet boy named Sunny that I desperately wanted to take home with me

-

“I think I love you.”

Jaskier smooshed his face against the glass, dancing his fingers in the air, watching the large cat within the enclosure stretch from its tail to its large paws, claws digging into the blanket it had just been lounging on.

He frowned, and lifted his head just enough to squint over at the piece of paper taped to the outside of the little kitty room. His tail and his large paws. Nose back to the glass, Jaskier cooed at the apparently two year old cat, his heart full to bursting as he stretched up to gently bap at the glass where Jaskier’s fingers were dancing.

“Oh, you’re just the sweetest, aren’t you? Such a good boy, the best boy.” Said best boy was also the largest cat Jaskier had ever seen, and according to his nice little blurb he liked cuddles.

Big, warm cuddles. He really never stood a chance.

“Jaskier.”

The exasperation in that tone made Jaskier pout, which really worked in his favor when he turned to Geralt. For maximum effect, he jutted his lip out a little more (he considered a quiver but thought it would be too much), and didn’t have to try that hard to get his eyes to mist.

“His name is Sunny.”

“No.”

“He’s been here for so long, Geralt!” A strategic step sideways covered up the little kitty blurb, and he hid the movement with a wild gesture. “Just- just look at him! Look at that face! Can you really say no to that face?”

Geralt didn’t look at Sunny, his arms crossed, the betta pellets they’d come for in his hand.

“In and out, Jaskier. We don’t need anything-”

“He needs us, though.”

“-but the fish food. Have you even owned a cat before?”

Deflating, Jaskier heaved a sigh, turning to stare wistfully at the sweet baby who was now batting around a crinkle toy behind him. “No. My father was allergic, and even after the divorce my mother couldn’t stand them. She’d apparently owned quail once and had a vendetta ever since one killed a few of them.”

“An impulse fish is one thing,” Geralt said, though not unkindly. And he was right, technically, even if Jaskier wasn’t a fan of the logic.

Didn’t mean Jaskier was really ready to give up. Especially when Sunny meowed at him - Jaskier gasped, and cooed at him again, letting the sweet ginger boy chase his fingers.

“He has such a tiny voice for such a big, big man. Isn’t he so sweet though?”

Geralt was quiet standing next to him, and Jaskier studiously ignored his judgment, complimenting the newest love of his life like he’d never get the chance to ever again.

In the midst of their bonding, Geralt leaned down to read Sunny’s bio, dryly saying “been here so long” when he saw Sunny had only been there for three days. He was still reading it when a worker came by at a brisk walk, holding a dripping mop and pushing their frazzled bangs out of their face.

“He’s up for greetings if you want,” they said quickly, stopping just long enough to point at another worker who was fishing out some cherry shrimp for a mother and her small child. “She’s got the keys.”

“We can meet him?” Jaskier was certain the worker was an angel, albeit an angel barely hanging on to their sanity, and he quickly turned his big, wet eyes to Geralt again before he could try to talk him out of it. “Just a quick meet and greet. A cuddle or two. A hug? It couldn’t hurt anything, and he’s probably lonely.”

Geralt gave up in record time, sighing with a shake of his head as he went to fetch the worker with the keys. And Jaskier did his best to not be a sore winner and hid his fist pump.

In a matter of minutes, they were let into the back, in a small room where the kitties could meet their prospective adopters. Sunny was plopped down with little fanfare, and he stretched himself out again, reaching up a nice scratching post on the white cat tree that took up a good portion of the room.

Determined to make the most of their short time together, Jaskier picked through a toy box until he found a nice feather wand, and he did his best to get Sunny’s attention. But Sunny only watched the feather for a few seconds, batted at it once, and decided the tall man that was ignoring him was far more interesting.

Geralt didn’t even flinch when Sunny launched himself at him, climbing up his leg like he was the cat tree. Up he went until he was standing on Geralt’s shoulders, and he let out a soft mew, bonking his head against Geralt’s hard enough that Jaskier heard it.

“Must have a hollow head,” Jaskier said solemnly, coming up next to them to pat Sunny’s side gently. “Orange cats share a brain cell, I’ve heard.”

For a split second, Geralt frowned. His hand went up to steady the large cat that had decided to sit on his shoulder, Sunny’s weight shifting as he licked a paw and started to clean his face.

“He’s not dumb,” Geralt said decisively, and if Jaskier hadn’t known any better he would have said fondly.

Or, maybe he didn’t know better. He squinted at Geralt, who was not looking at him - rather pointedly not looking at him.

“No, no. Of course he’s not dumb.” Jaskier stroked Sunny’s soft fur, letting his tail flop with a thud against Geralt’s back. “I’d hate for anyone to think he was.”

When Sunny started to purr, Geralt’s expression softened, and Jaskier had to bite back a devious grin.

“Can you imagine misunderstanding such a sweet boy?” He sighed dramatically, scritching Sunny’s chin - and Geralt had to hold onto him to make sure the poor thing didn’t fall right off his shoulder. “I hope he gets picked by someone who would love him, and who wouldn’t ever dream of insulting him.”

“I know what you’re doing.”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” Jaskier lied, but one look at Geralt’s face and he gave up with a full body slump. “Fine. But I’m not wrong, we could give him the best home.”

“We don’t have anything for cats at home.”

Jaskier opened his mouth to respond, but snapped it shut, narrowing his eyes at Geralt - because that had not been his ‘we’re absolutely not doing this’ tone. And Jaskier was ever an optimist when it came to getting what he wanted.

So he leaned into his boyfriend, arm wrapped around his waist, and pet the sweet kitty who was hard at work making biscuits out of Geralt’s shoulder.

“Pet store,” he said, catching Geralt’s gaze and flicking his eyes towards the door. “And if we’re confused, we could always ask for help picking out what he’d need. Look, Geralt, he loves you - could you really say no to that face?”

Sunny took that moment to bonk Geralt on the head rather hard, and Jaskier saw the moment Geralt gave in.

“Fine,” he grumbled, but Jaskier was already pumping the air before he got the word out. “You’re cleaning the cat box.”

“A fair trade for taking such a sweet, good boy home.” Jaskier reached up to scratch both of Sunny’s cheeks, and teared up when the kitty started to lick his hand. He’d never fallen in love so fast in his life and couldn’t wait to set their place up for Sunny - it was going to take a chunk out of his savings but it was absolutely worth it.

Especially when he caught a glimpse of the soft smile Geralt was trying to hide. He wasn’t the only one who’d fallen in love, after all.

#mywriting #geraskier #geralt #jaskier #the witcher #fanfiction

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jaskierswolf · 1 year

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It is not Jaskier dragging new pets home, despite popular belief. The white haired boyfriend, however, might have a bit of a hero complex.... (hehehe)

The Menagerie

Ship: Geraskier Rating: T Summary: In which Geralt adopts far too many animals, but Jaskier still loves him.

On AO3 _

Normally when new people met Geralt and Jaskier they made assumptions. Geralt liked to brood, well, no... more actually he was just painfully shy with low self-esteem despite looking like a god. Unfortunately, he also had possibly the worst case of resting bitch face that Jaskier had ever seen, and had never quite grown out of his goth stage. In contrast, Jaskier's emo phase had lasted all but a month back when he was fifteen and he'd quickly swapped the black hair and leather wristbands for floral shirts and as many rings as he could possibly fit on his fingers. He had, however, kept the eyeliner. It looked good on him. These days he just preferred a slightly lighter look instead of the thick black rings around his eyes.

The point was when people entered their house and were greeted by no less than three dogs bounding into their laps, swiftly followed by a cat on their lap as soon as they sat down, they assumed that Jaskier was the cause.

In reality, Jaskier was a little hopeless with living things. He could barely keep himself alive, and he'd never managed to look after even the simplest of plants.... let alone a whole menagerie of pets. Jaskier's forte... pun intended... was music. Where Geralt collected animals, Jaskier collected instruments. Between the two of them, their house was a mess and savings were none existent. All of Jaskier's royalties went on their hoards.

It made for an interesting interview around his house. The door had opened, revealing the camera man as Jaskier had known it would, and the questions began. The interviewer was baffled. Due to Jaskier's success, he was sure that expectations of their house would be very different. Clean for one. And probably minimalistic, only filled with his awards and fine art beyond the bare essentials. What they had found instead was a mess of fur, cat litter and sheet music. It looked not unlike student accommodation from Oxenfurt, only much larger and way more pets.

Jaskier couldn't complain. It was home.

Actually, no. Scrap that. He could absolutely fucking complain.

His shoe landed in a pile of cat sick and he hopped from the living room straight into a pile of litter that had been kicked from the tray.

"Geralt!!" He yelled up the stairs to where his husband was no doubt lurking in the office. "One of the cats has been sick!"

"Clean it up then!" Geralt called back.

Urgh. Yes. Definitely complaining.

It didn't take long to deal with the sick, but Jaskier ended up in a bit of a cleaning spree. After the mess was dealt with, he remembered the litter, and whilst cleaning up the litter he noticed just how much dog hair was lying around and sticking to his socks. Then the vacuum bag needed emptying and the bins had to be taken out, and three hours later, Jaskier collapsed on the sofa.

The living room was looking spotless, or as spotless as it could be with a veritable zoo living under their roof. He was just about to pull out his laptop to check his social media, when Pegasus, the fat white fluff ball that Geralt had rescued last summer, flopped onto his lap, meowing loudly.

Jaskier sighed. "I suppose you want feeding. You know you're on a diet, yes? The vet was very firm about that." In response, Pegasus just meowed again, widening his big blue eyes.

Urgh. Jaskier hated animals. They were so needy.

"Fine," he grumbled. "Come on then, shit legs."

The fluff ball was pulled into his arms and Jaskier trudged into the kitchen. Before he could blink, he was surrounded by dogs and cats... even Lark the Cockatoo had landed on his shoulder.

"Oh for mother of-" he groaned, staring up at the ceiling as if that might help. "GERALT!!"

"Yes, dear?" His husband said from the doorway. Roach, a great mutt of a dog, was by his side, wagging her tail happily as Geralt scratched behind her ears.

"Help?" Jaskier whined, pouting at his husband.

Chuckling, Geralt crossed the room and pulled Pegasus from Jaskier's arms. He pressed a kiss to Jaskier's temple and then shooed him from the room. "I've got this. Go sit down." He paused. "Thanks for tidying up."

"No problem, my love," Jaskier replied, relieved that his pet sitting duties were over for now. He winked at his husband and blew a kiss. "Join me once you're done with the hoard?"

But Geralt wasn't listening. He was too busy cooing over the animals, already telling them stories from the actual zoo where he worked part-time. There was a big smile on his face and Jaskier melted. That was, after all, the whole reason they had so many pets. It was worth it just to see Geralt smile like that. Like there wasn't a care in the world. When they'd married, Jaskier had vowed to do anything to make his husband happy, and if it took running a rescue centre for neglected and forgotten animals to do that... then so be it.

#the witcher #geraskier #geralt of rivia #jaskier pankratz #geralt x jaskier #wolfie's witcher writing

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inexplicifics · 2 years

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I reread The Debt Is Terrible That Must Be Paid In Song and there is this part about Aubry: '...introduces Jaskier to the black-and-white cat that likes Aubry best'. And now I have to ask, what did Noisy think of Jaskier suddenly being a baby again? Is there possibly a tiny snipet from the cat's point of view that you could share?

Oooh hm. Nosy was probably very disconcerted.

*

Quiet-Thunder and Sings-A-Lot don't come to their den the day after Gooseberry-Magic and Likes-Geese make a big magic smell up in their tower and then all the Two-Legs make lots of noise and smell unhappy for hours and hours. They don't come the day after that, either, or the next day, or the next, and finally Nosy goes looking for them, because Quiet-Thunder is his Predator Two-Legs and he's supposed to be there to pet Nosy every afternoon!

He finds Quiet-Thunder up in a tower, sitting beside a window with a small Two-Legs in his lap. Nosy hunkers down behind a chair and sniffs delicately. The small Two-Legs smells weirdly like Sings-A-Lot, but...not. Maybe Sings-A-Lot had a kitten? But then where is Sings-A-Lot? Nosy hasn't seen or smelt him for days, and he wouldn't just leave, not when he's mated to the White Predator Two-Legs and Smells-of-Magic.

Quiet-Thunder looks up and sees Nosy, and makes a little coaxing sound, holding out a paw. The small Two-Legs looks up, too, and bounces in Quiet-Thunder's lap, making excited noises. Quiet-Thunder hushes him, and the small Two-Legs closes his mouth and holds out a tiny paw to Nosy.

Nosy slinks forward warily, and lets Quiet-Thunder pet him for a moment while he sniffs at the little Two-Legs's paw. He still smells like Sings-A-Lot. Quiet-Thunder takes the little Two-Legs's paw and uses it to pat Nosy very gently, and Nosy decides that maybe this is Quiet-Thunder's kitten, or at least one that Quiet-Thunder has adopted, as sometimes queens will adopt orphans into their litters.

Well, if this is Quiet-Thunder's kitten, then he's Nosy's kitten, too. Nosy plops down on the small Two-Legs's lap and starts to purr as Quiet-Thunder guides the small Two-Legs in petting him gently from ears to tail. Nosy and Quiet-Thunder will make sure the small Two-Legs learns how to treat a cat.

#questions answered #snippet #cats of kaer morhen #accidental warlord AU

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bluedillylee · 1 year

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I like to think Jaskier got a cat in between season 1 and 2

#the witcher #witcher netflix #jaskier #Jaskier adopts a cat #long post

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catscraftsandcommentary · 10 months

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I have had A Thought, and now I have an Important Question.

How much crossover is there between the Discworld and the Witcher fandoms?

Because you CANNOT TELL ME that (if Geralt and Jaskier ever wandered into Lancre accidentally) Nanny would not IMMEDIATELY try to adopt this adorable little bard and set him up with one of her dozens of daughters. Probably while groping Geralt's biceps and offering him a glass of scumble.

("It's apples! Well...mostly apples.")

(Never drink Nanny's scumble.)

The old woman in the corner (where Geralt would LIKE to sit, actually) is giving him a piercing stare that reminds him uncomfortably of Vesemir when he knows that Geralt is hiding something. He doesn't know who she is, but everyone nods respectfully to her and a few greet her with "Mistress."

He'll just tell his brothers to steer clear of this strange valley when he gets home this winter...especially after the vicious hangover from the apple drink from the grabby old woman - apparently she's the blacksmith's mother? A good smith, at least.

...except, of course, Lambert thought he was JOKING about the whole weirdness, so he and Aiden wander in the following spring. They startle a one-eyed cat while out hunting a stag (what cat - a literal cat, not a cat witcher - tries to hunt a fucking STAG?!?) and it turns into a man and attacks them. Then runs off through the forest. The hell IS this place.

#Discworld #the witcher #crossover #terry pratchett

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cao-the-dreamer · 5 months

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10 characters, 10 fandoms

Tagged by @greypetrel thank you! This looks fun, though idk if I'll reach 10 knowing my very few hyperfixations 😂

Tagging @lush-specimen @torisfeather @dangerouslyclassyhottub @emikokiichigo101 @selanaris @notebooks-and-laptops and YOU, the reader

1. Whirl - Transformers (IDW)

Listen. He's insane, he adopts a murderous shape-shifting creature as his daughter, he's got high heels, he spent most of the comic playing matchmaker despite saying he doesn't do "relationships", he provoked a war, he becomes best friends with the guy he tried to kill (and vice versa), he's a war criminal but since they're all war criminals it doesn't mean much lmao. Do I have to say more?

2. Batman (played Robert Pattinson) - Batman 2022

Batman but he's a soggy wet emo cat. Wanna wrap him in a blanket and listen to My Chemical Romance together.

3. Jaskier - The Witcher (TV)

Honestly he's the only reason I'm in this fandom lol. Bard but he's a damsel in distress. Let's put him in situations.

4. Fenris - Dragon Age II

Kiss me already, you handsome broody elf with a tortured past.

5. Belle - Beauty and the Beast (1991)

Me? Projecting on a beloved character from my teen years? It's more likely than you think :3

6. Mulan - Mulan 1998

Projecting again? Projecting again.

7. Papyrus - Undertale

Beloved character and beloved video game who introduced me to the concept of fandom as a whole and to my very first fanfictions.

8. Tzipporah - Prince of Egypt

Absolute queen. It's a movie I watch over and over with pleasure, and she's my favourite character.

9. Zagreus - Hades Supergiant

...I think the GIF speaks for itself XD

10. Giant - The Iron Giant

Shut up I'm not crying over a robot who doesn't want to kill SHUT UP I'M NOT--

#my stuff #not tagging because oh boy there's a lot #tag game

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fangirleaconmigo · 2 years

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Hi Des, I have an ask for your i can't believe it's Not fanon series

The fanon thing that Jaskier befriends all the witchers He meets. Can you do something for that? I would really love to know which witchers he meets and whats his relationships with them is

Hello dear! There are surprisingly few witchers in the book series. Other witchers are mentioned in passing but that’s it. They aren’t named and you get zero details about their lives with two exceptions.

In Blood of Elves, you meet the witchers who are wintering at Kaer Morhen, but Jaskier isn’t there.

Then, in Season of Storms, you meet a cat witcher named Brehen in a tavern. Dandelion is there for that, however it is not a friendly meeting.

Brehen threatens to kill a priestess right in front of Geralt and challenges Geralt to a fight to the death for a contract.

So, once Brehen is gone, Dandelion does what he always does, which is talk too much shit and tell people how lucky they are that Geralt of Rivia was there:

“…they really are like cats: aggressive, cruel, unpredictable, and impulsive. And Geralt, as usual, is making light of it so as not to worry us.”

It’s too bad he doesn’t meet other witchers in the books, because I do think he would absolutely love that.

Dandelion very much gravitates towards non humans. Also, his very favorite people seem to be blunt, rough around the edges types with hearts of gold and a penchant for drinking and chatting shit. And we all know who fits the bill for that.

Also, he loves Geralt, so he ends up loving and caring about anyone important to Geralt. (Regardless of how rocky it is at first with Yen). So the Kaer Morhen witchers would get adopted sight unseen, I think. And if he visited, he would get ten ballads minimum out of Kaer Morhen itself. The history, the moat, the people.

And I think they’d like having him around too. In the setting of the witcher books, storytellers are prized and to top it off, he would love to try their white gull and talk into the night with them, I’ve no doubt. As long as no one expected him to do chores or engage in any athletics or combat, they’d all be good.

#asks #the witcher #the witcher books #dandelion #Jaskier #canon or fanon

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witcherthingies · 2 years

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Step 1 in Modernizing Kaer Morhen

This is a shout out to all forced IT children and grandchildren. Braver than any US Marine

Jaskier was right in that modernizing Kaer Morhen was a clusterfuck of scared and confused workers and confused yet fascinated witchers. Because of where they were located, it was safer to fly in everything needed, which meant many of the witchers first experience of the modern world was in the form of a large cargo helicopter being landed in the fucking courtyard. Most of the witchers were far away from the strange flying device, recoiling from the terribly loud noise. Of course most of the cranes were going as close as they dared, examining everything and chattering amongst themselves.

“Right first thing they’re learning is the internet and google,” Jaskier sighs, leaving the witchers to question the poor pilots as he showed the workers what went where.

Turns out, Kaer Morhen is able to get excellent reception due to its position! Jaskier knew to limit the amount of modern technologies within the keep, at least at the beginning, and so he had just a few TVs littered about and a few computers and laptops. The council room got the most upgrade, due to the need of having information quickly. Jaskier then had to quickly recruit people to teach the witchers about the technology and to keep them from throwing a fucking knife at the screen.

Luckily he knows quite a few college students who are very familiar with helping the elderly with tech support and would love the job opportunity.

Watching Geralt work on a laptop is about as amusing as he thought it would be. The brave White Wolf, the great Warlord of the continent, looking truly pissed off and grouchy at the screen before him and typing with his two pointer fingers.

Cirilla takes to technology like a duck to water. Or... really a teenager to social media. Her and Jaskier are quick to create various social media accounts: twitter, instagram, tiktok, all of the major ones. The username for them all is simply @KaerMorhen with the title page most often being “The Witchers of Kaer Morhen.”

Jaskier then makes a video for his main account promoting them and telling his fans that this will (hopefully) not get too in the way of his music making.

The first post on all of the Kaer Morhen accounts is a video with him and Ciri before the large hearth in the main hall.

“This darling, beautiful young woman next to me is Cirilla, or Ciri.” Jaskier introduced with a broad smile. “Daughter of Geralt, my darling husband.” She rolls her eyes but smiles and waves for the camera. “As you can imagine there will be quite the adjustment period,” Jaskier continues. “But so far everything is going well and hopefully Ciri can take over as our social media manager.”

“Seems a whole lot easier than being a princess,” she comments idly, which makes Jaskier laugh.

The video gains a whole lot of traction, with replies upon replies filled with questions. Their next video is a quick questionnaire, the two again side by side with the consort holding pages of questions.

He asks them quickly, “Why don’t you have cat-eyes like your dad?”

And Ciri answers just as quickly. “He’s my adoptive father.”

“Were you really a princess?”

“In a way, yes. But I was a witcher princess so I was a lot cooler.”

“Are you single?”

“I’m fourteen.”

“Can we get a tour of the witcher castle?”

“Once everything is settled and we’re sure the witchers won’t freak out, then yes.”

“Why is your dad a DILF?”

“... What’s a DILF?”

“And that’s all we have time for! Thank you all so much for your questions and curiosity! It really does help the witchers feel at ease.”

It’s another month until Jaskier has a video with Geralt in it. He’s lounging in their bed, Geralt beside him reading.

“Darling,” He asks with a smile, Geralt hums. “You know... technically I’m older than you now... By a lot.” It makes Geralt stop reading, blinking several times as the information sinks in. “Which means I’m a cougar and you’re my boytoy.” Geralt gives him the most exasperated glare, Jaskier can only smile wider, and the video stops there.

#thingywritesthingies #modernized awau #kaer morhen #jaskier would take full advantage of officially being like the oldest person in kaer morhen #geralt of rivia #ciri #cirilla fiona elen riannon #witchers #ficlet #my writing

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thenightling · 11 months

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Fully detailed Episode guide of The Witcher Season 3 part 1. The Detailed episode guide is in the link below.

A few thoughts...

1. There's been a full year time skip since the end of Season 2. This is understandable. Honestly, I think the biggest writing mistake they made in Season 2 was having Yennefer consider Sacrificing Ciri to get her powers back. Of course Geralt's not happy. She almost handed his adopted daughter over to a demon.

This is the act that I think the show writing team might regret. Sure, it gives a lot of angst, but it's also a sort of character-assassination. It goes again Yennefer's behavior in the books and that sort of betrayal is hard to get past.

It's almost like- to me- when Season 4 of Once Upon a Time had Snow and Charming attempt to sacrifice Maleficent's baby just because Emma had the potential to be good or evil- like anyone, and they didn't even want to chance her going dark.

An interesting bit of writing doesn't necessarily mean good in the long run for characterization or storytelling.

2. I am a little concerned about the description of the mid-season finale as being The Witcher equivalent of The Red Wedding. Are they going to kill off more characters who actually lived in the books? I'll repeat that Jaskier is my "Ride or Die" for The Witcher. If they kill him off I stop watching.

3. The description if the mid-season finale sounds like another annoying game of "Is this the present or a flashback or is this all happening at the same time" like Season 1 of The Witcher, which was a shameless knock-off of HBO's Westworld series and it was the weakest part of the season.

4. It's not too surprising that the mid-season finale ends on a cliffhanger but I never liked cliffhangers. I prefer closure and satisfying endings or things carrying on in a semi-status quo. I may end up doing what my friend Lorie plans on doing, and wait until the entire season is out (end of July) and then watch it all together to avoid the annoying gimmick of mid-season cliffhangers. Bonus: 5. In regard to the scene of the fire and cat I sincerely hope Geralt didn't set the fire. I know he's after a villain but I don't like the idea of Geralt potentially harming an innocent cat (even though the cat looked unharmed in the teaser). Yes, I know he killed a deer for the meat in the first episode of Season 1 but that's different.

#The Witcher #Witcher

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bobbersb-fandomfun · 2 years

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I bring you some aesthetic mood boards inspired by The Songbird of The Cats by @ohwhoopsok I absolutely loved this story and was so happy to make these as a gift through @fandomtrumpshate I hope you enjoy the boards and love the fanfic as much as I do! Check the tags on AO3 for the fic. Title: The Songbird of The Cats by WhoopsOK Rating: Mature Fandom: The Witcher Ships: Jaskier | Dandelion/Original Character(s)Aiden/Jaskier | DandelionAiden/Lambert (The Witcher) Summary:

A bard singing in the woods is nothing much worth paying attention to, he’s done it for years without interruption. So, he makes up a song on the fly—a very thinly veiled warning about conniving nobles and traps set for hissing creatures. It’s the best he can do. Apparently, his best is good enough this time, because when he turns around to head back to his room for the night, he nearly smashes his nose into a witcher’s chest. (After the dragon hunt fiasco, Jaskier accidentally finds himself adopted and thoroughly loved by a clowder of Cats.)

#fan art #moodboard #aesthetic #the witcher #school of the cat #whoopsok #fan art inspired by fanfiction #not my fanfiction #awesome fanfiction #fanfiction recommendation #fandom trumps hate

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