#ITS SO FUCKING UPSETTING. I COULD BE FINE RIGHT NOW.
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also banging myself over the head i hate this here medical things so fun bonk bonk. today i found out for the first time i mean i really just never thought about it but i have a medical condition. a medical conditionnn i was going to the eye doctor every month like please😭
#i’m dealing with insurance stuff rn bc i was on my mom’s but she never renewed it#when i’m FINALLY trying to get medical shit done and the insurance doesn’t get renewed😭i can’t even be angry bc she truly believed she did#it but her memory played tricks or smth.#i also can’t get mad at her for never taking me to the doctor bc i’m also culpable i knew what i needed by the time i hit teens but i never#pushed her...i was too scared to ask😭when i did ask about going to the doctor for immediate pressing issues she’d get so mad#i still should’ve pushed tho bc SHIT WOULD NOT BE AT THIS POINT IF I WENT EARLIER. NOT JUST MY EYE BUT MY TEETH TOO.#ITS SO FUCKING UPSETTING. I COULD BE FINE RIGHT NOW.#I WOULDNT BE BLIND IN ONE EYE RIGHT NOW!!!!#i wouldn’t be missing a fucking tooth or have all this other. shit happening like i’m going crazy.#throw back to that first eye appointment and after the doctor explained all that needed to be done and what my future outlook was like i#started crying and my mom thought it was bc i was scared like ‘just get it done it’s okay’ LIKE NO IM CRYING BC THIS WOULDNT BE HAPPENING IF#WE GOT THIS DONE SOONER!!!! LIKE YEAH THE DOCTORS WERE SHIT BUT WE WERE REFERRED TO A CORNEA SPECIALIST AND NEVER WENT.#crying bc i’m scared please i’m so past that fucking point.#i’m considering not even getting the surgery not bc i’m scared but bc i’m like what’s the point if i have another eye condition that could#render this surgery useless or if i get hit on the fucking head i’d risk needing another surgery.#crying bc i’m scared i should’ve screamed in that doctor’s room.
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being mad at my parents for events long passed hours
#man my mom used to have my sisters help her pin me down so she could pop all the pimples on my face. bruh that fucking hurt. also.#worst thing you can do for those... i was having age-typical acne and i guess she just didn't like to look at it?? idk.#the acne itself didn't hurt but there was a lot of it so just like. you know how it does indeed hurt to pop those. well there were a lot#and she didn't stop even when i was crying and screaming bc she wasn't done??#and she did it to my back too and some of those grew on nerves and hurt even fucking more#and no she was not using properly sterilized equipment or even fresh washed hands thanks for asking <3 she acted entirely on impulse lol#i mean. i guess she knows its wrong **now** bc she hasn't tried anything similar with my baby sister....???#and shes starting to get acne like i used to have.#idk is that dramatic to be upset about. just imagine being pinched and pricked nonstop for like 2 hours. maybe it wasn't 2 hours.#but also physically restrained too like straight up sat on. is that fucked up.... thats not normal right???#and uh. a few years ago they held me still to shave my armpits with my dad's clippers bc mom is completely convinced#it isn’t possible to be hygenic as a 'woman' with pit hair or anything bc of Pheromones!!! and when i say goddamn fine#i'll just use men's hygiene stuff then she says that won't work bc Pheromones!!!!#like having a slightly different endocrine system makes ppl a different species or something#anyway. i cried just a little bit when they did that <3 gave me razor burn#and after my dad asked like 'is growing that hair out like. important to your identity or something' and.#well i dont know but that fucking hurt and you violated the choice that *eye* was making with *my* body#man i know mom still thinks she never physically abused me bc she didn't ever like. beat me up or anything but. thats abuse right??#she still thinks i was calling her abusive out of fucking nowhere.#sometimes she asks 'when was i ever abusive' and i give her an example and she goes 'well that was JUST BECAUSE--' and like. girl.#you think just bc you can justify it to yourself it wasn't abuse? every abuser can justify it to themselves....#talk tag#man i keep forgetting about how she used to physically restrain me to do her not-dermatologist approved extractions.#i guess it mostly didn't hurt that bad but like. the forcefullness and duration of it. lmao#anyway i found her a late mothers day gift today. its a hairstick with a dragonfly charm#abuse tw#sorry if that triggered anyone b4 i remembered to tag it
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ahsgsjaugejwjg
#sh/sui warning for tags#been having a shit day and just not feeling great overall and usually drinking water and eating helps but it hasnt today :/#which means its an Actual Problem this time. like i knew it was an actual problem when i fucking cut AGAIN but idk#idk man. im just so so so scared of my friends hating me#and i know i have to see my partner again bc she is the one and only person that never ever makes me feel safe and unjudged and everything#but idk. as of right now im just not havin a great time.#like its actually so stupid the things i get upset about. there was some motivational speaker at my school today and when we got called down#to go watch the presentation i had to take like five seconds to grab my bag and phone from my desk#and my two friends got up and left together without waiting for me#and i know it wasn’t their intention and they weren’t trying to be mean or anything but man. doesnt make it hurt less yk.#and i saw some post from a guy in my school of him and his friends in the cafeteria and idk why but it made me so sad. it made me think abt#one time my friends said they wanted to walk around at lunch so i was like ok i’ll eat alone that’s fine bc i’m too disabled to walk around#the school. and then someone sent me a pic of them all eating together in the cafeteria. and i know they probably just stopped there for a#second and weren’t purposely ignoring me or anything but man that did not help yk#i want to leave them alone bc they never seem to want to talk to me but im trying to tell myself its just my mind but its so hard to#and i do love my friends and im making them seem a lot worse here than they are but its just. god im so scared.#idk. i dont actually want to die but i wish i could kms like. temporarily.#i know this is bad and manipulative but i just cant shake the want to know what would happen if i did yk. and this is a terrible train of#thought but like i want my friends to realize how scared this makes me and if i have to kms to do that. idk.#ive brought it up to them before and they pretty much told me to eat with someone else and i said i didnt have any other friends and they#kind of just said not my problem. so i dont want to bring it up again bc im mature enough to deal with my own issues and shit#it’s just hard man. i dont know how im supposed to communicate w them bc everything feels like im traumadumping on them and i dont want to#bother them. im trying to convince myself its not an issue and it doesnt actually bother me but i know it does bc i just fucking relapsed#and i had a city council thing in class today and i was the only person that was denied any funding at all and i was trying not to take it#personally and i was doing pretty good but i told my mom about it and she started defending the ppl that refused me anything and then it was#suddenly personal to me for some reason. its stupid and i know that but god that doesnt make it any better#rambles#vent
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a thing i have JUST realized, isn't the human brain amazing lol -- is that we talk about izzy's thoughts and feelings on ed, on blackbeard, about how he serves one but not the other, etc, etc, and how it means he never loved or even respected the True Man Underneath It All but rather the bloodthirsty legend of a pirate--
e x c e p t izzy is not the first person who makes the distinction between edward and blackbeard. it's ed himself, when he says "actually, i want to be called edward from now on".
before, when he was with stede, it didn't bother him at all that the crew called him blackbeard. that was his name! he was blackbeard, what else would they call him. only stede and izzy got to "ed" or "edward" him, because they were closer -- stede was his first close friend, izzy was his friend and first mate for decades. (note that fang was with ed the longest, but he doesn't call him by his name! you gotta deserve it.)
izzy doesn't do anything inappropriate or out of proportion when he snaps at the crew to call him blackbeard or captain -- that's who ed is, is supposed to be, to them. they're not friends! they even call stede captain, and have you seen that guy?
it's ed that makes the connection between his current state: draped in fuchsia robes, singing sad songs about how sad he is, showing his vulnerable and emotional state in front of people who are supposed to respect and trust his authority. and by that he splendidly loses that authority, to the point that wee john calls him ed, and when izzy snaps at him for disrespecting his captain, ed goes no, actually, yknow what, do call me edward! and then he goes on to encourage the crew to sing as well and hey, actually, why are we being pirates! we should do a talent show!
the distinction is clear here. before all that, in izzy's eyes, his boss was blackbeard, captain, ed/edward -- different names for different occasions, but one and the same guy. but now? this guy singing songs in a pink bathrobe doesn't want to be called blackbeard, he's edward! ed time now! we're going to eat marmalade and express our feelings in front of everyone! and hold talent shows! Ya Hoo !
yeah, it's no wonder izzy doesn't want that. he wants his competent captain back, and this current dude, edward? he's not him. so, uh,
#shrimp thoughts#AND it's not izzy that's the final nail to magenta ed's coffin. it's the lads calling for EDDIE to come and sing for them again#right after izzy -- his first mate! the guy who followed him for all those decades with only mild complaining and an occasional#fed up tirade here and there -- tells him he has no reason to respect him the way he is now. if that's the way with izzy -- then fuck!#what about these guys? those basically strangers to whom he stupidly bared his soul? who are treating him like a source of entertainment?#man's just lost izzy's support. he doesn't have stede (the guy who has the sort-of loyalty of the crew). and the crew respects and admires#blackbeard -- but ed? eddie? uh oh.#look at his face and body language before and after the 'hey eddie give us another song!'. before: he's clearly upset by what just happened#but he starts to fix the robe on himself. starts trying to deal with it and stuff. but the second he hears that one sentence? he freezes.#he turns his head towards the source of the voices -- the crew chanting his name -- very slowly. his eyes are barely moving#this is not to say that izzy's words had no effect on him because they clearly did! but he did not go full kraken to make a point that izzy#is wrong and actually pink and karaoke are good. he goes kraken because attack is the best defense. and it's so fun when#everyone laughs at your jokes and claps when you sing! it's just that people are fickle as fuck :/#tl;dr the bekrakening is a complex process that doesn't have its source in one grumpy first mate who just wanted everyone to do their jobs#but rather in a fuckton of factors from which one was -- yeah -- stede abandoning ed after he bared his feelings to him. leaving him a#confused raw wound. which would be fine if ed was a teenager but unfortunately he's a scary pirate who loves a good maim#this post is soooooooo long oh my god i could have fit it in three short paragraphs probably
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I miss my comfort zone I wish I'd stayed in my comfort zone
#this might be too much i think im gonna barf#maybe not but it feels like it#if someone mentions it im going to#its not a bad change necessarily but it might be too much#i really wish i could drive myself home right now#NO#IT NEEDED TO HAPPEN ANYWAYS#oh theres no context#im freaking out because i bleached my roots because they were growing out#im very picky about things staying the same when i do to school#otherwise i have a nervous breakdown and throw up#but this isnt that big#i look the same as before#i shouldnt think of every little change as scary and im not going to stand out because of this#i mean not anymore than i already did#BUT THERES A CERTAIN LEVEL!!#OF DIFFERENT THAT I LET MYSELF BE!!#god its been almost three years i need to get over it#my roots are ORANGE though#im so fucking upset about that#theyre not SUPER orange youd have to stare at them to be able to tell but#orange enough that theres a difference#im getting them fixed this weekend its fine
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— vent — su*c*d*l thoughts mention —
#i fucked up and confessed to my roommate that i was actually suicidal today.#i immediately backtracked obviously and told him that i could handle it and it wasn’t a big deal#i know i wasnt really convincing but i give him so many chances to tell me he cares and even after the literal worst thing i could say#he still has nothing for me#(which upsets me but i try hard to not let it show bc he has a lot of growin to do b4 hes ready to handle more than what he needs to)#and thats fine. he needs time to process but i just dont have the patience and need someone right now#but there is no one and its all my fault. what have i done and how do i get out?#cyfm
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Hear me out. I can't be the only one that wants to fuck Al's demon form. Like not just the black eyed tentacle gig, I'm talking full form like the size and all 😭 I can take it I swear, Al (narrator: she could not)
Title: A Reminder To All…
Themes: its giving monster fuc but like oof, demon!form Alastor, tentacles, established relationship, rough sex, growling, blood, possessive behavior, antlers, animalistic behaviors.
It was a rather quiet afternoon at the Hazbin Hotel.
You were up in the radio tower straightening a few things while Alastor was out doing gods know what
You decided that since you had cleaned up most of the place that you would take a stroll through town as some down time.
You hummed a tune as you passed many sinners out and about. Your stroll led pass the digital shop. You slowed as you noticed a crowd gathered outside a Voxtech store.
There were multiple tvs playing things in the windows and what caught your attention was the deals they had going on.
You bit your lip. Oh it couldnt hurt to window shop right?
You entered and was immediately overwhelmed by all the fancy tech.
why did hell need modern tech you had no idea.
A shiny pink camera caught your attention.
And it was cheap.
You did need a new camera. It would help with advertisement and to show the progress of the hotel you thought as you happily paid for it and went about your way.
what you didn’t know was that Vox had been tracking you the moment you left the hotel.
that camera of yours was now his gateway into seeing what Alastor was up to.
Once back at the hotel you pulled out your shiny new purchase.
you turned it on and walked around filming a bit.
You checking the footage to check out the quality when you heard a record scratch
”what is that my dear?”
You jumped at the sound of Alastor’s voice and spun around holding the camera
His eyes narrowed on it and quirked his brow at you, airing for an explanation.
”Well Al I-I just thought that the hotel could use a camera to help with promoting. We can record our progress. Now you don’t have to do all the work.” You said with a nervous smile, hoping he wouldn’t toss it.
He walked closer to you, mainly keeping his eyes on the tech.
”and where did you get such a frivolous thing?”
you gulped “At the v-voxtech store”
His ever-present smile tightened before he shrugged “fine if you think it’ll help”
you breathed a sigh of relief and happily went about your way testing it out.
Unaware of the growing shadows emitting from him.
after spending a few hours getting the hang of your new device, you decided to call it a night and put your camera on your nightstand as you got ready for bed.
You shivered slightly under your cover, grumbling you furrowed further to seek some warmth.
why the hell was it so cold?
you shifted again in bed to feel a heavy weight on top of you.
your eyes flew open and you were met with a very frightening sight.
Alastor.
In his demon form.
Your breath got caught in your throat “A-Al?”
He tilted his head, smile wide and sharp “Sleeping well my dear?” His voice was staticky and distorted.
you were so confused.
you hardly EVER saw Alastor upset, especially to the point were he was in his demon form.
“Why is that in your room dear?” He hissed out, jutting his chin to your camera.
You tilted your head confused at his question.
he was angry about a damn camera?
A clawed hand was at your throat.
”I allow many things dear, but this unattractive piece of scrap in your room? That is where I draw the line”
You let out a squeak as your clothes suddenly disappeared and covers ripped away.
”A-Al?!”
Your hands were quickly restrained by his shadows and your legs were spreaded to welcome him closer.
when the hell did he undress?
You felt the faint ghost touch of a tentacle slide against your cunt, teasing your clit. You let out a soft moan.
”Already soaking dearest?” He hummed amused.
You felt the weight of his dick slap against your cunt.
your eyes widened he wasn’t going to…
”Alastor w-wait! I c-can’t!”
A long tongue sweated the side of your face
”But you will darling” and with that he slammed into you.
Your body seized at the sudden intrusion. You let out a cry that was silenced by a tentacle wrapping around your mouth.
Alastor rutted into you, growling and snarling.
Your eyes faintly drifted to the camera by your bed.
A blinking red dot turned on and off.
Alastor gave you a rather harsh thrust.
”eyes on me dear”
you whined loudly, trying to shift your body to accommodate to his harsh thrusting. Your eyes drifted to the top of his head.
Antlers.
you felt your fingers itch with the need to find purchase on them.
you gave a tug at the shadows and huffed, making little grabbing motions hoping he would get the hint.
he granted you grace and your hands immediately flew to his antlers.
He let outa low growl and sunk his teeth into your shoulder.
With his dick hitting that delious spot inside you, you could feel him bottoming out.
You were flipped onto your stomach, facing the camera.
the shadow around your mouth disappeared and a claw hand found your tongue.
”put on a show Mon cher” You felt him flush against you.
Moans and whines filled the room as he pounded your cunt.
A high pitch whine left your throat as you felt your cunt clench around him.
you were gonna cum soon.
”A-Al-la-stor Ah!” Your eyes crossed as your body tensed and twitched from your orgasm. He let out a deep growl and quickened his pace.
Did he get bigger?
you were suddenly face to face with him.
Your noses brushing against each other as he sought after his own release.
Your arms wrapped around his elongated neck and a hand found one of his ears.
you tugged.
Static ran through your body as he slapped his lips on yours and slammed his hips into you, purring as he filled you with his cum.
you whimpered as your legs were finally released and dropped.
Alastor was breathing heavy as he reached over to the camera
”hope you enjoyed the show old pal” he laughed before destroying the camera.
you were drifting to sleep as you watched him transform back to normal.
”sleep well my dear” was the last thing you heard as he tucked you into his side, humming a soft tune with a wide smile.
He gave a reminder.
Dont fuck with the Radio Demon.
#hazbin hotel#hazbin alastor#alastor the radio demon#alastor#alastor x reader#alastor x y/n#hazbin hotel fanfiction#alastor smut#jyoongim
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hm.
#delete later#had for various reasons a huge anxiety attack yesterday and kept digging my nails into one of my thumbs in#what i should probably admit is self harm#uh#self harm tw#and i didnt bleed like i had wanted to at the time but i did still manage to fuck up my skin there and#now here i am with Consequences of My Actions and trying to do what i need to do today is very daunting when my thumb hurts like this#its been rough since yesterday when the anxiety attack happened. i've slept like. 12 hours and still feel alternately tired and stressed#i just. ugh. one moment youre going to an art museum and then before you know it youre sobbing in the museum bathroom#having done sth you said you'd never do again Years ago. and yeah it wasnt as serious an action as it had been years ago#(which. if we're being honest. the fact it wasnt 'as serious' and could be passed off as not being a conscious action is part of#why i didn't stop myself sooner)#but it still hurts and it still feels like such a loss of progress and healing i've done for so long#and now we're pretending everything is Fine cause i dont want to upset my roommate with this or make them like. feel guilty or anything#and i want to move past how last night went for me and how awful my first trip to that museum was and guess what#my stupid actions means my thumb is right there hurting and reminding me of everything that went wrong.#anyway. i think the next museum trip i make will be made on my own#samantha talks
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pink princess
words: 2.4k
warnings: 18+ only!!, smut, p in v sex, female receiving oral, girly!reader, violence, blood, rafe beats someone up, kelce is the bad guy in this D:
“i just don't get it rafe.” kelce shakes his head.
“what?” rafe mumbles, barely paying attention to his friend. even topper seems barely interested, both too focused on the football game playing on the television.
“how you could date a girl like y/n.”
your name has rafe snapping to attention, turning to glare at kelce. “what the fuck is that supposed to mean?” rafe has only been your boyfriend for a couple months now, but he wouldn't question beating the shit out of his friend if he insulted you.
“don't get me wrong, the girl is nice and all. i like her she's just so… girly.” kelce says like it's an insult. “she only ever wears pink, she's all sweet and innocent. she's just not your type, that's all. im surprised.”
you let out a little sound, all of the boys attention snapping to you, kelces eyes widening when he realizes you have entered the living room.
“baby.” rafe coos softly. “come here.”
you cross over to rafe, rounding the couch to plop on his lap, keeping your head down to avoid looking at kelce.
“don't listen to him, princess.” rafe says softly, his voice so sweet, in contrast to the scared look on kelces face. “you're exactly my type.”
“shit rafe, i-i-didn’t mean-i didn't know she was-”
“get the fuck out.” rafe says, voice still soft as he pets his hand over your back, hating the pout that graces your sparkly gloss painted lips.
“rafe-” kelce tries to argue.
“no. get the fuck out. you're lucky im not beating your ass into the ground for upsetting my girl. now get the fuck out.”
kelce scrambles, rushing out of tanneyhill as the game continues on the tv, topper rightly deciding to remain silent.
“baby, talk to me.” rafe says softly, seeing tears still brimming in your eyes.
“im fine.” your voice is hoarse when the words finally escape your mouth.
“darling.” rafe sighs, tugging your bodies closer together, letting your head bury in his shoulder, not caring if you leave makeup stains on his shirt.
rafe knows the best thing to do is just let you breath, not wanting to work you up more with his words as his hand strokes over your back, hoping it's bringing you some sort of comfort.
“i had no idea he felt that way.” you finally pick your head up. you weren't close to very many girls, so when you and rafe started dating, you tried to quickly assimilate into his friend group and consider his few friends yours as well.
“he's just being a dick. don't worry, alright bunny? you're absolutely my type, and i love how girly you are, mkay?” rafe waits for you to nod and agree with him before he pulls you into a kiss, topper keeping his eyes trained on the tv while you make out.
--
“you ready to go princess?” rafe calls up the stairs, tapping his foot against the wood floor, waiting for you to finish getting ready to attend the gala he promised his dad he would be at.
“coming now!” you say before rushing down the stairs, but still being careful not to trip in your heels.
“you look gorgeous, honey.” rafe admires your outfit. its a new dress, or at least one that he hasn’t seen before. rafe takes your hand in his as you finish your descent, frowning when he realizes the glittery polish that was on your fingers has been scrubbed off, replaced with a creamy white that matches your dress, the only pink thing on your body being your lipstick.
“is that what you are wearing?” rafe questions.
“why, is something wrong with it?” you frown as you look down at your body.
“no-no.” rafe shakes his head. “not at all baby its just… very formal.” he figures the wording is better than blatantly asking why you’re not covered in pink and sparkles.
“well, it’s a formal event.” you roll your eyes, heading towards the door, not wanting to give ward a bad impression, and you know you’re already running late.
“yeah, right.” rafe nods, but his mind whirls in secret, wondering if there could be more to your change in appearance than that.
--
“you're going golfing with top today right?” you ask, rubbing your fingers through rafes hair, massaging his head.
rafe knows you said something, but he's too relaxed to actually make out your words, struggling to blink his eyes open before humming, “what?”
you giggle at his blissed out expression, leaning in to press a kiss to the tip of his nose. “you're going golfing with topper later today right?”
“mhm.” rafe nods, letting out a soft moan when your long acrylics gently scratch over his scalp.
“maybe you can take me. ya know, i could learn how to golf. probably start with just putting.” you shrug.
“baby-” rafe has to take your hands and move them away, knowing he won't be able to focus on the conversation. “why do you want to learn how to golf? you hate sports.”
“that's not true!” you complain. “i like um… gymnastics and figure skating.”
rafe rolls his eyes “you like them for the sparkly outfits and music.”
you pout, moving yourself from straddling rafes lap to next to him on the couch. “aren't i allowed to be interested in the things you're interested in?”
“yes, of course.” rafe sighs, moving to kneel between your knees on the floor, taking your face in his hands, not letting you look away. “and if you really want to come, id love to have you. but if you are asking because you're trying to be less girly, then baby-” rafe leans in to press a kiss to your pouty lips- “i don't want you to change. i love you for who you are.”
“promise you don't mind?” your fingers play with the collar on his shirt, distracting yourself.
“promise.” rafe nods.
“okay, thank god.” you let out a giggle. “golf is so boring.”
--
you have your laptop and phone opened up, intensely scrolling as you switch between them, brow furrowed as you do your research.
“y/n-”
you slam shut the laptop and turn the screen off on your phone as rafe walks into the room.
“what are you doing?” rafe questions.
“nothing.” you smile at rafe. “just some online shopping.” you hope it's believable, but you can tell by rafes hesitation that he doesn't fully trust your explanation.
“okay…” rafe slowly approaches the bed, and you quickly move your laptop and phone to the bedside table as rafe crawls up next to you.
you distract him from asking more questions as you press your lips against his, pushing him to lay back on the bed as you grind down.
“ah, fuck.” rafe moans when you pull away, pulling your shirt off over your head to reveal that you aren't wearing anything underneath.
rafes hands cup your tits, massaging them in his large palms before suddenly flipping so you're the one laying down against the bed, completely forgetting about your suspicious behavior when he entered the room.
what rafe doesn't know, as he lowers down your body and flicks your nipple with his tongue before sucking it into his mouth, is that you weren't online shopping, rather scowering through social media, trying to find all of rafes ex girlfriends or anyone he interacted with, all while you compared the girls to yourself.
you wish kelces words didn't still echo in your head, especially after rafes insistence they weren't true.
--
“gonna take a shower.” you tell rafe, setting your bags down in the foyer, knowing you'll get around to them later.
“you sure not a bath? i can run one for you.” rafe offers, following you up the stairs.
“nah, that's fine.” you shrug, frowning slightly when you see your display of lush bath bombs. you're trying to be less high maintenance, more easy going.
“come on, what if i wanna soak with you in the bath?” rafe pouts. “please baby.”
you can't help but giggle at his doe eyes blinking at you. “okay, sure.”
“good.” rafe hums before placing a hand on your waist, pulling you in for a quick kiss before he heads towards the bath, turning the hot tap on. you watch as he looks at your bath bombs before selecting a light blue bath bomb with star embeds.
rafe sets the bath bomb down on the edge of the large tub before turning to you. “what should we do while we wait for the bath to fill?” you question, tugging your ponytail out to let your hair fall.
“mmm, i know exactly what i want to do.” rafe says.
in only a few moments he has your shorts down, perched on the edge of the bathtub while his head is buried in between your legs, tongue licking greedy stripes over your cunt.
--
“missed you.” you whine, burying your face into rafes chest as he rocks gently, holding you tight to him.
“missed you too, princess.” rafe is relieved to finally have you back in his arms. hes been away for an entire week, and you came to the airport to get him despite rafe insisting that he was fine to get himself home. you just couldn't wait any longer.
you whine when rafe pulls away slightly, making him laugh and tug you back into him.
“clingy baby.” rafe coos, but the words make your cheeks hot as you pull away.
“hey, hey.” rafe grabs your hand, tugging you back against his chest. “i didn't mean it like that.”
“okay.” you whisper with a nod, tears brimming in your eyes. with rafe being gone, you spiraled even further, going as far as to befriend a couple of his exes to compare yourself even more to them. you also attended a party that kelce was at, and while he didn't speak at all to you, you could occasionally feel his eyes on you, disapproval in his gaze.
“love you so much bunny.” rafe says, rubbing his large hands over your shoulders. “let's get home so i can show you how much i missed you, yeah?”
you perk up as you nod, making sure your hand is clasp together with rafes as you head out of the airport and towards the parking lot, your keys hanging from your finger that isn't intertwined with rafes.
“here, baby.” rafe opens the passenger side door for you, but you frown and don't move towards it.
“you just got off a flight, rafe. i can drive.”
“nope.” rafe snatches the keys out of your grasp. “you're my girl, and as long as im here you have no need to drive yourself. now get in, my passenger princess.”
--
“ready for the party?” you ask rafe, adjusting your skirt as rafe walks down the stairs.
“of course.” he smiles, pressing a kiss to your lips before looking down at your outfit.
“baby… is this really what you want to wear?” rafe asks. he likes any clothes you put on, but the black skirt paired with a plain white cropped tee, not even accented by any jewelry just isn't you.
“i just…” you swallow. “i just know kelce is gonna be there. wanna show him that i don't need to be wearing sparkly pink every second.”
rafe can't speak, the anger quickly rising when he realizes that months later you still haven't let go of kelces words, still worrying that you arent the right person for rafe.
“go put on a sparkly dress.” rafe simply says, not able to keep his voice soft, despite addressing you. you hustle upstairs, changing into the outfit you really wanted to wear, adding some jewelry and colourpop super shock shadow to your lid.
you bounce down the stairs, feeling much more yourself now.
“theres my pretty girl.” rafe says, his words sweet but his face still angry as he places a hand on the small of your back, guiding you out towards his truck.
he speeds to the party as you sit there silently, playing with your rings, worried about what is going to happen when you get to the party, especially knowing kelce is gonna be there.
“rafey, don’t do anythi-” you tell him as he helps you down after parking, but you can’t even finish your sentence.
rafe eyes kelce standing on the front lawn, a red solo cup in his hand. he hasn’t spotted rafe yet, but you know as soon as he does the smile is going to drop from his face.
rafe begins to stalk towards him while you trail behind, grimacing when rafe throws a punch, landing right on kelces cheek.
“fuck you!” rafe shouts, shoving him back before kelce can even realize what is happening.
“yo, man, stop!” some guy you recognize but don’t know his name yells, but doesn’t try to get in the middle as rafe punches kelce again.
you can’t help the smile on your face, watching your man defend you throughout anything, even if it involves turning one of his close friends into a bloody pulp.
“y/n… it’s gone on long enough, stop him.” topper comes up behind you, making you jump.
you turn to look at him before back at kelce, eyes glazed over as rafe shouts at him again. you rush to rafes side, grabbing at his fist. “okay, okay.” you tell him softly. “he gets it.”
rafe steps away as kelce falls to the ground, his chest heaving as his lip and nose drip blood. “let this be a lesson.” rafe turns to the crowd that has grown. “no one shit talk me or my girlfriend or this is what happens to you.” rafe points at kelce, not giving another word before stalking away, literally grabbing you and picking you up to carry you back towards his truck. you stay quiet as rafe sets you in the passenger seat.
“are your knuckles hurt?” you ask, petting your hand gently over his wrist as rafe shifts the car into gear, rushing away from the party.
“i’ll be fine, baby.” rafe says, glancing at his reddened fingers. “just need to get you home.”
“oh.” you nod, knowing that while rafe got some of his anger out on kelce, he’s certainly going to get the rest of his pent up energy out on you.
it takes minutes from the time you get home for rafe to have your back flat on the bed, his large cock thrusting into you.
you moan out, hands gripping at his shoulders, your nails leaving scratches against his tanned skin.
“you’re. my. fucking. girl.” rafe says, accentuating each word by pounding his cock inside of you.
you let out a moan, kelces mean words thoroughly beat out of your head as you nod. “im yours.”
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#GUYS RAFEY LOOKS SO CUTE IN HIS SILLY LITTLE HAT I CANT#HES MY BABY#rafe smut#rafe cameron smut#obx smut#outer banks smut#rafe fic#rafe fanfic#rafe fanfiction#rafe cameron fic#rafe cameron fanfic#rafe cameron fanfiction#rafe imagines#rafe drabble#rafe fluff#rafe cameron imagine#rafe cameron drabble#rafe cameron fluff#rafe x reader#rafe x you#rafe x y/n#rafe cameron x reader#rafe cameron x you#rafe cameron x y/n
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Demons and Humans not understanding each other
Inspired by several other posts I read about this same thing <3 honestly even if the brothers insisted it was safe, I would consult Satan, Lucifer or Barbatos
this is mostly mammon freaking out
Humans think the deadliest things are like, adorable, like Cerberus. Mammon especially does not understand why Mc wants to run towards the very dangerous, very mad three headed dog. A few times he has had to throw Mc over his shoulder to keep them from staying behind
“MC CERBERUS BEING THE BEST BOY DOES NOT JUSTIFY HIS ACTIONS HE WANTS TO KILL US”
“But he’s so cute! He just needs a snuggle buddy”
Humans can also be very stubborn if they’re too hot or cold but refuse to admit it. It’s fine with Lucifer does it because he’s one of the most powerful and therefore resilient demons in Hell, but not so much when Mc does it. Beel and Mammon love playing in the Devildom snow, but given that it’s the Devildom, it’s definitely a lot colder than it is in the human realm. Even after ten layers, Mc is still freezing but refuses to admit it.
“Mc, are ya shivering? I thought ya would be too warm under all that”
“I’m sweating with this one jacket”
“I’ll live! Let’s go back to the snowman”
“no I don’t think you will”
On the same note, sometimes demons forget humans can’t withstand crazy temperatures. Asmo will invite Mc to a popular bathhouse, sauna or hot springs, forgetting that the temperature would literally boil Mc alive
“Hey Asmo this is the place you wanted to go, right?”
“Yes! Isn’t is cute?”
“Everything except the part where I boil alive”
“what!”
Some foods can kill humans just by being near them so imagine how the brother would feel when they learned this, it’s giving that lunatic pudding incident with Diavolo from that one card
“Mc! You’ll love this. Open wide!”
“Asmo I feel funny”
“DO NOT FEED MC THE TAKEOUT LUCIFER SAID ITS DEADLY FOR HUMANS IN LARGE AMOUNTS”
“FUCK NOT AGAIN”
In retrospect, humans probably sleep a lot compared to demons. Some demons probably don’t sleep at all, except Sloth demons. Setting aside about eight to nine hours of the day just to sit idly might not make sense to them until they learn they will shut down without it
“How are you feeling about the exam we just took? Exam week is finally over.”
“Mc? Mc, Satan is talking to you. Why are you on the floor”
“MY HUMAN IS DEAD”
“No, I think they’re just asleep idiot”
“oh. wait, THEYRE ASLEEP IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HALL lucifer is gonna kill me”
I’d say both demons and humans are social creatures, but humans will go insane without social interaction. Yeah a demon would probably be upset if they didn’t talk to someone for thousands of years but I don’t think a human could last more than ten without losing grip on reality. Humans tend to copy each other, which is probably bizarre to demons. Humans don’t even understand yawning so demons definitely won’t
Going back to the food thing, demons can probably go ages without eating, besides Gluttony demons. Humans need to eat so frequently compared to them
“So you’re tellin’ me that if Mc doesn’t eat for a whole week, their insides start to eat themselves?!”
“Yes. But, Mc ate a few hours ago.”
(Mammon was already gone when Satan turned back around)
Demons probably also play game that would definitely kill humans. My brother and I used to play crazy games when we were little (our favorite game didn’t have a name but we would put Barbies in the toy train tracks and see what would happen when different Thomas and friends character would hit her. The train tracks would glow in the dark! I did not let him put my favorite doll in the train track and he had to listen since I was the older one, she was not a barbie and had bendy feet? that’s not for now) but we never seriously got at each other throats. I cannot imagine what games demons and demon children must play. Satan was born fully grown but imagine if he was born little and the brothers had to play his favorite games with him. I feel like they would find the Barbie game I played a little weird too. Like, they would probably tell me that I should’ve done it in real life since that would be better experience or something batshit like that
“Aww, Satan, do you remember all the times we played “Five minute eye stab” with Lucifer? You were so cute. Sometimes I think Luci let you win.”
“Do not talk to me Asmodeus.”
“I’m sorry, you played what?”
“One time we gave him an actual knife by accident and since he was good, he ended up stabbing Lucifer’s eye.”
“You’ll be next if you don’t shut up and let me read”
“HE WHAT”
“Oh he’s fine now, clearly. Only took him a few hundred years to regain normal eye functions”
“Can we not talk about this anymore?”
Babe it is a miracle Mc is still alive
#obey me#obey me!#obey me belphie#obey me satan#obey me asmo#obey me beel#obey me levi#obey me mammon#obey me luficer#obey me x reader#obey me x you#obey me x mc#obey me mc
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im BEGGING for some joost hurt to comfort!! something like hes having a bad day and when the reader tries to help him hes js so overwhelmed he snaps at the reader but like in the end they make up and stuff
Valentine, my decline is so much better with you.
I love love love hurt to comfort!! This goes hand in hand with another request I had! That being said, go give your loved ones a hug and tell them you love them.
requested? yes!
reader? gender neutral!
genre? hurt to comfort, arguing, eventual fluff
︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵
"Fuck!"
The cursing coming from the other end of your apartment today couldn't be counted on both hands anymore. Joost was two days away from releasing a single he wasn't even happy with as of now.
A few months ago you decided to finally move in together and since both of you had rather stable jobs, looking for an extra room to get your boyfriend a studio at home made sense. It gave him the chance to really focus on his music at a a place he felt comfortable at, and on top he could always ask for your opinion on something, if you weren't currently at work, where you wish you would be at right now. You decided to only take a short shift today, wanting to get home and relax, but your boyfriend had been tense the whole day, which you really didn't blame him for, but you knew he was a perfectionist when it came to his music. He had a bad habit of being rather unresponsive whenever he was really focusing on his work, meaning a tab on the shoulder while he had loud music blaring through his headphones, with his computer screen being a mess of snippets and recordings for a song, it would totally send him over the edge of sensory overload. Today was one of those days where it seemed really bad for him. He fed himself into a hole of hating a perfectly good, soon to be released, single and now he was stuck in a loophole of fixing things that didn't need to be fixed, being satisfied with them, and then when listening to it again, suddenly hating the entire thing. You have tried to offer him your help or comfort several times today, but he always declined it, yet seemed grateful for your care. It got so bad that you had to pull his chair out of the room for him to come eat dinner with you, and only if you could eat while laying on the couch so he could cuddle with you, which he desperately needed today.
You were in no way upset with him or this situation, at least not for the reasons one might be, but instead the fact that he had promised both himself and you to stop listening to upcoming releases three days prior to the date they were supposed to come out, because that was the time where his brain decided to convince him half of what he just created over months was absolute shit. There was nothing you could really do to help him, except make sure he at least remembered his basic needs like eating and sleeping.
You tried to calm yourself down and try not to worry too much about him, taking a deep breath before you heard anything curse word coming from his studio, followed by a loud shatter, and rather quiet whimpers which convinced you to go check on him one more time. When you opened the door you managed to figure out what happend- he knocked over a glass and it seemed to have cut his finger just a little. "Hun, are you okay? Let me help you." you quickly grab a few tissues to place on his finger as you tried to calm him down but he seemed to have been pushed over the edge completely with this. "I don't need your help! I told you, I dont want help, I don't need it, I am perfectly fine! Please just stop interrupting me for fucks sake." the first thing he said to you in hours and its you getting yelled at for trying to help the poor overworked man? You throw the rest of the tissues at Joost for him to care for his own issues now. "Deal with it yourself." you ended up leaving him right where we was, trying to hold back tears as you let yourself fall onto your bed, wanting to scream into the nearest pillow. This wasn't a side you knew from him, because he really never got mad at you. As much as you wanted not to have to blame him, this was beyond unnecessary.
The tears start flowing, your hands clutched against the pillow as you curl up on your side of the bed. You weren't necessarily crying about being yelled at, you were a tough one afterall, but more so the fact that he worries you so much and what you get for offering help ends up being disrespect.
You were barely even awake a few hours later, having spent the evening by scrolling through various social media apps just to distract yourself. Right when you decided to stop waiting for your boyfriend and head to sleep, you felt the dip in the mattress next to you, meaning Joost had decided to finish for today. He turns arond to face you, or more so your back, to carefully brush some hairs out of your face, allowing you to feel the new bandaid on his finger. "Sweetheart, I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have yelled at you." he eventually huffed, his voice quiet enough not to disturb you, even though you clearly weren't asleep. His voice was raspy, barely even audible- maybe from crying, maybe from recording vocals all day. Slowly, you turn back around to face him, your hands holding onto the blanket. "I got lost in the single and broke our promise. You just wanted to help but I was so overwhelmed and then it just all tipped over- I'm really sorry." Joost rubs his eyes as he finishes his sentence, the tear stains quite obvious on his face. You only wrap your arms around him to pull yourself close to him, feeling the need for being close. "It was unnecessary but it happens to everyone some times... Thank you for apologising."
With that, you fell victim to being covered in kisses.
JOOOOST IS BAAAAACK
anyways i hope this was good xoxo
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i love your preggo wife drabbles soo much!!! could you write one where joel takes care of reader with her morning sickness? 🫶🏻
Joel dealing with Preggo Reader: Morning Sickness
Notes: Idk why I keep making reader so mean but he's such a trooper! I'm also no pregnancy expert obviously so plz take my minimal effort in research with a grain of salt.
Warnings: mean reader, language, vomitting, morning sickness
- - - -
"I hate your penis."
Joel rolls his eyes. It's only the 11th time you've said it today while being hunched over the toilet, with Joel caringly hovering over you, holding your hair out of the way as you take a deep breath and hurl the breakfast he made you this morning.
"I hate—"
"I know, sweet pea. Just breathe."
You nod in an almost drunken state. He knows its because you've got no energy in you to really fight him, with the baby giving you all the first batch of hell in the life long journey of headaches in child bearing.
He rubs over your spin, caressing the shivers raking over your body so you can focus on not dying right now.
"I hate your toes. I hate your shampoo. I hate your fingernails. I hate your toast. I hate—"
"Ah huh..."
At first he was pretty upset and angered by how much you loath him, but at some point he's tuned it out and just holds and shushes you. While you pout your disdain for the man, you don't oppose his touch.
For now.
"Doin' so good, baby. It's only temporary, baby's just making sure you're a tough momma—"
"Shut the fuck up and get me some water."
Joel stands, his knees reminding him of his less than youthful age, before running downstairs and grabbing a bottle.
You were both a little surprised that all the morning sickness you were warned about hadn't really given either of you trouble in your first trimester. It came with a surprise by the middle of your second, and comes and goes on a daily basis. Today is honestly not so bad: it's your attitude shift that really gives him whiplash.
By the time he gets back up, you're already meandering out of the bathroom like a lost soul with puffy, sleep deprived eyes, and over to the bed, slowly crawling over the mattress, muttering "too tall". You feel his hand supportively on your back, but you snap "fuck off" and get in the bed yourself. He goes to tuck you in with the sheet, but again your hand slaps his away and you close your eyes into darkness.
You can still feel his annoying presence. "What!" You yell, eyes shooting open to see the bottle dangling from his hand. You snatch it without a thank you and gulp.
Joel's just got his hands on his hips, staring at you.
"Kern I hEp ouu, Hondah?" You gurgle through your water sloshing in your mouth.
He just chuckles to himself. "You're cute like this."
You swallow. "I'll fuck you the fuck up."
He laughs even harder, seemingly unserious in your threats. To him, you looked even smaller than before, despite the obvious roundness growing in your tum tum. You seemed like some small puppy finding her growl, or toddler pointing her finger trying to be intimidating but unaware of how badly you're failing.
"So amusing? Why dont you make yourself useful and rub my feet," you demand.
"You need to eat food, baby girl."
"BaBy GiRl" you mock with puppet hand mouth. "NAG nag NAG. I Don't WANT food. I want my FOOT. In your HAND. before I put it up your ASS."
Joel can tolerate the baby cock-blocking him for a few weeks and the endless assult of your words, but he puts his foot down when your basic needs arent being met. "I need you to eat food. You need energy. Baby needs energy."
"Fine! Crackers, you crackhead. Then—" and you thrust your leg in the hair and wiggle your foot in his face so he gets the picture.
"Okay okay!" And he walks out the bedroom.
Joel spends a record 4 minutes downstairs hurriedly putting together a fancy array of cracker options, from Saltines, to Townhouse, to Ritz. He also pops a few cubes of diced ham in his mouth and then holds a few in his hand to snack on later since he too had to abandon breakfast to service you.
By the time you're conplaining "it's been hours!" He's trotting up the stairs, you wiggle your bum so you sit upright in bed, hand over gurgling belly as he brings the tray to you.
Just as youre about to feast on these dry ass cardboard squares, your nose twitches. You see Joel chewing something in his grasp, popping one cube of pale meat quickly into his mouth, and it takes all of 2 seconds for the smell to travel to your brain before you're throwing the tray on the ground, crackers spilling all over the carpet and b lining to the bathroom again to throw up.
As he hears your dramatic gasps and hurls, Joel pulls out his little note pad he's been documenting your pregnancy so far. He writes "no ham" in the lines , right under "hates my penis", before tossing the paper on the bed and stroking your hair lovingly again as you empty your entire organs in the toilet.
By the time you finish, you've got snot and tears running down your face. "but I LOVED HAAAMMMMM" You screech.
It's true. You used to wrap a thick spread of cold butter on a slice of cheap deli ham and eatnit like a cannoli— something he thought was a weird aquired taste BEFORE he even got you pregnant.
Joel grabs a tissue and plants it firmly in your face, and you squeeze your eyes tight and blow right into his palm like a little snot nosed trumpet. He rubs his fingers in your nostrils to get all the boogers out before tossing it and helping you up to your feet again.
All the while you're bawling "l-l-loved—my hh-ham—n cheese" with gross babbling as he tucks you back in the duvet. You were fine with giving up other aversions like tomatoes, pizza crust, and yogurt. Even sex (occasionally). But your beloved ham is one baby step too far.
"Your—"sniffle— "big—"hiccup—"ugly—"choke—"WORM —" cough—"DID THIS TO MEEE," you accuse his crotch and wail into the air.
Then you hiccup very loudly and go quiet entirely.
You look around with curious eyes, fresh tears suddenly unbothering you at the moment.
"Mmmmmmmn crackers," you moan. "Gimme that one," and you point to the mess on the floor.
"What one?"
"That one!"
He bends down and picks up a piece.
But you shake your head. "No that one."
"No." "No the other." "No."
"Which one!" He shouts, unable to contain the lace of frustration.
"The one I'm pointing to, stupid!"
He finally picks up one hes pointed to 3 times already and you clap your hands.
You snatch it out of his grasp, pull a hair off its curved cracked edge before munching on it happily.
He looks at with uncertainty on his face.
You swallow the dry mushed bits and hum contently. "Mmm. Salty."
-
Not even 12 hours later you two are getting ready for bed, and you mood has completely changed. Still sick, but instead of being unable to stand Joel's entire existence, you praise it.
"Joel, honey? Can you please prop my feet up Under this pillow. I'm sorry. I just can't seem to reach it myself."
"Baby? I'm a little thirsty. Can you get me some water?"
"Im so sorry, Joel. I just can't stomach this food, I know you put so much effort into it. Ugh! I loved this, I really did! I don't know what's wrong with me."
You rub over the discomfort in your slightly swollen tummy and try to be a brave girl and fight the tears, as Joel's been so attentive to your needs, aches, cries and cravings, only to hurl them back up.
You sniffle and look up to him.
He's a bit tense, almost in a fight or flight stance with fear behind his eyes.
"W-whats wrong, Joel?" you ask with a honey song voice.
"Who are you and what have you done with my wife?"
- - - -
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I'VE GOT A SCENARIO, ok so I saw the Monty doing Roxanne with reader being jealous and got a thought. Reader is dating Monty but cheats on reader with Roxanne. They cry to Bonnie for comfort cuz he's sweet bunny but little does the reader know his idea so comfort is something else 👀. Monty catches them and is fumming cuz he knows Bonnie's been pinning for reader the whole time. Bunny boi looking at Monty while pounding reader like whatcha done do? 👀🐇👀
your prayers have been answered my sweet
in this, reader calls bonnie thumper as a nickname. I will STAND WITH THAT HEAD CANON UNTIL I DIE.
GLAMROCK BONNIE x READER
tw: NSFW THEMES, cheating, mentions of panties for the feminine ppl, not read over it just finished it off this morning, mentions of vaginal parts
every day was getting more and more exhausting for you. Your pay check is slipping, your sink was leaking and your relationship was fading.
you would find yourself getting upset and just breaking down, the first person at your side would always be bonnie.
he would always hear to what you had to say, he gave great advice and if you need to cry in his embrace, hes happy to be there for you.
"its gonna be okay superstar, I promise" he held you and stroked your hair as you quietly sobbed into his bowling shirt.
"I-its not... hes going to leave me.. I-.. I just don't know what to do"
you knew deep down it was for the better. all monty ever did was insult you and ignore you. NOTHING about him screamed "caring" in any way.
"but... it'll be for the best." you stuttered, wiping your tears from your face.
you patted Bonnies leg and gave him a little smile, indicating it was time for you to finish on your check-ups with the other glamrocks. god how he loves that smile.
before you pulled the door he grabbed your waist from behind and hugged you.
"just one more before you leave, im gonna miss ya'" he said whilst resting his head into the dip of your neck.
"Awww, thumper. c'mere"
the large thump of the elevator hitting the floor woke you up from your thoughts. remembering you have to finish off the last of the glamrock checkups and then your free to roam around for a bit until opening.
your first stop was freddy;
freddy noticed your tear stained face and questioned you about it but after you said it was nothing, he didn't want to push you into telling him. so he stayed quiet until you finished.
"alright! all done. you seem to be operating fine."
you gave the brown bear a smile, closing his stomach hatch.
"I best be on my way now".
and with that, you made your way to Roxy's greenroom but to your surprise, she wasn't there.
"that's strange... maybe she's in her raceway. ill check it later"
you grabbed your tools and headed to your gators greenroom.
you where absolutely terrified, why wouldn't you be? he has a short temper and isn't really fond of you DESPITE you being his significant other.
as you where about to place your fist onto his door, you heard something.
"fuckkk..roxyy"
you heard grunts and several slurs mumbling all coming from monty's room.
you felt dread bubbling in the pit of your stomach.
without hesitation, you slammed the door open to reveal a heartbreaking scene.
"what. the. fuck" you dropped your bags to the floor and stood in shock.
"ah- shit babe! its not what it looks like!"
monty tried to cover Roxy whilst trying to put his pants back on, knocking over a few objects thrown across his room.
"oh so you weren't just balls fucking deep in Roxy then huh?! do you think im a fucking idiot?!" you frantically waved your arms around, your head raging at the thought of your best friend FUCKING your boyfriend.
"no I-"
"so this is why you where so distant from me. you where screwing around with her!" you cut him off.
monty was silent. he knew you where right and you could see it on his face
Roxanne stood up and moved towards you
"im sorry y/n-"
"I don't want to hear anything from you."
and with that you slammed the door shut, walking back to the elevator you came from. you where too distracted to go check on Chica or the others. you had one destination you where gonna go to and that was it.
you felt your anger slowly melt into sadness and the aching in your chest started to become more apparent. tears started to run down your face.
"shit.."
bonnie was sat on foxy's stage, head in his hands and dying of boredom.
"why didn't I just tell her, kiss her.. or DO ANYTHING! god she's gonna get played by that dick-"
"b-bonnie.."
his head instantly turned.
"o-oh my sweet thing, what happened?"
he quickly ran to your side, putting your head in his hands.
"monty he...he.. I think he grew fonder to Roxanne.."
bonnie gave you a sad look, cupping your cheek in his hand.
"aw darlin'... im sorry you had to see that"
his hands ran down to your waist, pulling you into his chest.
"its going to be alright, love"
you wiped you tears and sat down, putting you head into your hands. Bonnie lifted your face up to meet him, giving you a soft smirk.
"I can treat you better than he ever could, y'know?"
your eyes never left his, getting lost in the sight that was in front of you. you felt your insides bubbling in excitement.
you knew there was always something there between you two but you always thought it was a misunderstanding. but now you realise that hes always been the one there for you, always been the one to keep you company on lonely night shifts, always been the one to understand and listen to you, hes always been the one.
"do you want me to treat you better?" his hands slowly slid up your thighs, rubbing the inside of your legs.
"y-yes..please" you stuttered, you heart was beating so fast. you couldn't actually believe this was happening.
"atta' girl" he said with a soft melodic tone.
NSFW UNDER THE LINEEE
bonnie's hands started to wonder all over you whilst he kissed your neck, touching all of your sensitive parts.
he was a bit hesitant a first but the noises you made encouraged him to feel more.
His hands tugged at the waist line of your pants, eagerly wanting to see the beauty between your legs.
"you sure you want this sweetheart?" he gave you a look of concern, making sure that this was the right moment for you.
"I am positive my little thumper, you're too sweet"
his foot pounded lightly in the floor from the little nickname you gave him. he felt as if he was under your spell, no matter what, all he could think about was you.
he pulled your pants off, revealing the laced panties you wore.
his hand glided over the heat between your legs, feeling your wetness and admiring the state that you where in. the state he caused you to be in.
"my, my baby. you look so adorable" he purred, his head going closer to your lower regions
"and you're all mine"
he pulled you panties off, staring down your dripping mess between your legs. his hands caressed your inner thighs, making your heat throb in anticipation.
even in such a desperate situation, he still made you feel special. it still made your stomach bubble butterflies.
"please just fuck me bon... I need you"
That lit something in him. Within seconds he’s picking you up and placing you on top of his lap, kissing your shoulders whilst his hands roamed the bottom half of your body.
You’re body was warm, soft, his hands gave you such a euphoric feeling. You knew in that moment that he’s what you want, your face grew redder and your heart beat increased.
You felt him slowly lift up your body as you felt something poking at your puffy core. A few whimpers left your mouth as you felt him enter inside of you.
“Fuckk, hon…”
His voice sounded so melodic, filling your stomach with butterflies, making you feel as if you’re a teenager again with a high school crush.
Your head naturally fell onto Bonnies shoulder as he started to bounce you up and down on his cock. He was slow and passionate. Not rough or mean like Monty was.
Your hands wrapped around him as your mouth opened, letting out the sweetest of noises, sending him over the edge, he was loving every second of it and you could tell.
“..’feels so good Bon..”
He smiled, he loved hearing you, especially like this.
“I know sweets, let Bonnie take care of ya’”
And with that, you’re riding up and down on him, filling your senses with a euphoric pleasure as he fucked you right to the edge.
By this point your legs had started to shake, you was clearly close and he wanted to get you to finish, all he wanted was for you to feel good.
His hands move as he moves one of them to your lower back and the other one straight to your puffy clit. As soon as his fingers made contact, your head flung back as the overwhelming feeling whipped straight to your core.
“O-oh my goddd… Bon..’mgonna cum..”
You mumbled as your body grew limp.
“That’s it clover, feel good on me, please”
And with that, you both felt your gummy walls tighten around him. Your body heaved as your clenched your fists and screamed for him, gifting him a small smirk on his face.
He pulled you off of him, not caring that he hadn’t finished, more of that he needed to take care of you. Pulling you into his chest, he moved a strand of hair from your face. You smiled at him. God. He loved that smile.
“God.. be mine hon, please”.
Sorry for the fact that it was rushed, its 3:56 and I’m tryna get all my drafts finished and I know y’all are back on the FNAF band waggon again so why not throw a few out there for you guys, love ya <3
Also please give me more requests, I’ve got no inspiration 😭
#fnaf#fnaf security breach#fnaf x reader#fnaf monty x reader#fnaf x afab reader#fnafsb#fnaf Bonnie#fnaf Bonnie x reader#bonnie x reader#glamrock freddy x reader#fnaf glamrock bonnie#glamrock bonnie#glamrock bonnie x reader
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The Golden Ratio - Part Two
Pairing: Michael Gavey (Saltburn) x f!reader
Warnings: Derogatory language, angst, smut, virginity loss.
Word count: ~4.7k
Chapter summary: Her and Michael struggle with the social side of university, and with each other. Series masterlist.
Author's note: For @assortedseaglass. No tag list. Please follow @fics-by-ewanmitchellcrumbs and turn on post notifications. Community labels are for cops.
She is halfway through her second can of Carling, having downed the first as soon as Michael handed it to her, before she feels ready to speak.
In a rare display of empathy, he had handed her a lager the moment he’d opened his door to her, clearly having taken note of her miserable state. There isn’t a mirror in his room, so she has no idea of how puffy her eyes may still be from crying.
The beer is warm, but it’s doing its job and that’s all she really cares about right now. With every pass of the fizzy, amber liquid down her throat she feels lighter - she doesn’t normally drink, so it doesn’t take long.
“Go on then,” she says miserably, drink held in a loose grip between both hands as she perches on the edge of his bed. “You can say ‘I told you so’.”
“About what?” He says, eyeing her carefully, from where he is seated on his computer chair, turned away from his desk to face where she currently sits, the frame of it creaking slightly as he sits forward.
She exhales, keeping her gaze fixed on the ring pull of her beer. “Rich…he’s…he’s been cheating on me.”
“Oh.”
Michael clears his throat, obviously uncomfortable, and for a moment she thinks he won’t say anything else. Her mouth turns downwards bitterly, thinking it’s best she just leaves.
“I’m sorry,” he finally says, so quietly she almost doesn’t hear it.
Her head snaps up, eyes locking with his, and he leans back as though wary of her reaction.
“For what?” She asks, a mirthless smile tugging at her lips as she cocks her head.
He bows his head, pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose with his index finger. “I dunno,” he glances back up at her, “just something people say, isn’t it? When something bad happens…”
“I don’t want your empty words,” she tells him, setting her can down by her feet before resting back on her palms. “Tell me what you’re really thinking.”
“You’re already upset,” he states matter of factly, “I don’t think that’s wise.”
“Fuck what you think!” She exclaims, shifting back to the edge of the bed. “Tell me.”
“Alright, fine,” Michael sighs, “I think Rich is a fucking loser, and him cheating is the best thing that could have happened–”
“Wow, thanks–”
“No, let me finish. He’s reading art, for fuck’s sake! What could you possibly have in common? You can do better, you’ve got a brilliant mind.”
Brilliant.
In two years, Rich had never once called her that. A feeling of warmth passes through her as her eyes meet the vibrant blue of Michael’s.
“You really believe that?”
“I know that.”
They stare at each other in silence for a few seconds, and she has no idea what possesses her, but suddenly she is leaning forward, pressing her lips to his. He is hesitant to respond, and when he does it’s chaste and uncertain, a marker of inexperience or unwillingness which she cannot decipher, so she pulls away.
But then he is chasing her, large hands cradling her head as he tugs her back, his mouth finding hers once more. This time the pressure is equal, their breathing heavy as the sticky sound of their saliva grows more significant.
Moving from the bed, not breaking the kiss, she straddles his lap, ignoring the way the chair wheels back against the desk with a heavy thud. Her fingers thread into Michael’s short, sandy hair, as the embrace deepens, her tongue brushing against his. She grinds herself down upon the rapidly growing bulge she can feel beneath the zipper of his cargo shorts, causing a rumble of approval to vibrate from deep within his chest.
It feels good to feel wanted, but as their hands paw haphazardly at each other through their clothes, doubt creeps into her mind. If this is his first kiss, then it would be his first time too. He is her friend, her project partner, she has just broken up with her boyfriend. None of this is a good idea.
Reluctantly, she pulls away, sheepishly climbing from his lap. They’re both breathing heavily, and Michael gingerly adjusts his glasses as he looks up at her in silent question.
“I’m…I’m sorry,” she says breathlessly, running a hand through her hair, “I shouldn’t have done that. I’m a bit pissed and got carried away…”
“Oh,” his eyes widen, as he nods in understanding, subtly moving to adjust himself in his shorts, “of course. I wouldn’t want to take advantage.”
She reaches out a hand, not quite touching him, but wanting to placate him as she fervently shakes her head. “No, no, it’s me taking advantage. I don’t want to ruin things between us. We’re friends.”
“Friends?” The way his eyes light up as he says the word makes her smile, hopeful that she hasn’t caused irreparable damage between.
“Yeah, friends.”
She needs that more than anything right now.
“So, what are you hoping to do once you graduate?” Michael asks, glancing between her and their collective notes.
It’s the day before they are due to present back to Professor’s Byrne’s class, and they have met in the library to go over everything one final time.
In the days since their kiss they have grown closer; sitting next to each other in the remainder of their introductory lectures and meeting up to work on their project, though they both know it is complete and needs nothing else doing to it.
She has grown used to Michael’s intensity, would go as far as to say she is fond of it, and genuinely looks forward to seeing him each day. Oxford feels far less lonely with him by her side.
“Something in the field of medical research,” she says, her fingers playing absentmindedly with the delicate softness of the petals of the sunflower head they’d cut down a few days prior. I read Professor Byrne’s paper before I applied here. It inspired me.”
“The one on biomedical systems?”
Her eyes light up as she smiles at him. “You read it?”
“Hmm. An interesting read, though I much prefer mechanics.”
“Is that what you want to do?”
“Yes, I think so. I’ve been reading a lot about random matrix theory. I’d like to go into the field of statistical mechanics.”
“I look forward to reading one of your research papers one day.”
They hold each other’s gaze for a moment, though she doesn’t miss the faintest of pink that tinges his cheeks.
It’s the day of the presentations, and just as she’d suspected, almost every group in the glass has presented back a table relating to how the Fibonacci sequence creates a spiral. Her and Michael share a knowing look, a smug smirk of satisfaction on each of their faces.
Aside from one presentation, which did in fact focus on rabbits, but delved too deeply into mating habits to be considered mathematical, theirs is entirely unique.
She beams with pride as she catches the impressed smile of Professor Byrne from the corner of her eye as they stand at the front of the lecture hall, talking through their findings.
“Very well done, both of you,” she tells them as they return to their seats.
The compliment makes her heart soar, providing her with a rush that lasts long after the class has been dismissed.
“Let’s go to the pub,” she says excitedly to Michael as they walk down Woodstock Road, away from the Mathematical Institute.
“You want to go to the pub? It’s the middle of the day.”
“There are no more lectures today, and I feel like celebrating. We really impressed Professor Byrne.”
Fifteen minutes later they’re sitting in the Lamb and Flag. A bright pink straw juts out of the neck of her bottle of Smirnoff Ice, and she rolls it between her fingers playfully as she watches Michael sip his pint.
The pub is half full with other students, all either skipping lectures or making the most of a free period.
“I told you that focusing on flowers would make us stand out,” she says, unable to suppress her grin.
Michael swallows his beer, wiping his mouth the back of his hand once he’s settled the pint glass back down on the beer mat. “Yeah, you did. We made the rest of the class look like losers,” he says with a chuckle.
“Yeah, we make quite the team, don’t we?”
He smiles, lowering his gaze and nods. There it is again, that adorable pink flush that dusts his cheeks.
“I’m gonna go to the loo. Will you watch my drink for me?”
He nods, watching as she stands and walks to the ladies.
Five minutes later, she can no longer see him at their table as she returns, though both their drinks are still there. She peers around the corner, seeing him standing before a larger group of students. A few she has seen around before, though they’re not on their course.
“So, is she your girlfriend then?” She overhears one of the guys ask Michael.
“No, not my girlfriend,” he responds, “but I’m helping her get over a break up, if you know what I mean.”
She swallows, feeling her heart lurch as she listens, unable to believe what she’s hearing.
“Oh yeah? Really helping her get over it, I bet,” the guy says, earning raucous laughter from the rest of the group.
She storms towards them, deciding she’s heard enough. Despite wanting to sound angry, her voice trembles as she speaks, betraying the tears she’s fighting to hold back. “I haven’t slept with you!” She shouts at Michael, meeting his shocked, wide eyed stare. “I would never sleep with you!”
Turning on her heel, the pub door swings open with a squeak of hinges as she pulls on it. She walks quickly down St. Giles’, swiping angrily at the tears that have begun to roll down her cheeks.
How could he? They were supposed to be friends and he’d talked about her as though she was something cheap. She had thought Michael was different to everyone else.
Back in her room, a hollow ache has burrowed its way into her chest, as she lays flat on her back on her bed, staring up at the ceiling. The high of that morning’s presentation is long forgotten as her mind races with thoughts of what she’d overheard in the pub.
Why had he spoken about her like that? Had he been pretending to like her all this time just for the sake of the presentation?
Nausea swirls in her gut as she’s startled from her throughs by a soft knock at her door. She knows who it will be before she even answers it, and is half tempted to simply ignore it, she doesn’t want to see him. However, curiosity gets the better of her and before she can stop herself, she’s moving towards the door to open it.
Michael stands on the other side, posture not as straight as it usually is, as his shoulders slope and he looks at her imploringly. If she didn’t know better, she’d say he looked remorseful, but he is too self assured for such emotions.
“What do you want?” She asks tiredly.
“I’m sorry,” he says meekly, his voice softer than usual. “I shouldn’t have said what I said.”
“No, you shouldn’t,” she snaps. “So why did you?!”
“When you went to the toilet, that group called me over, started asking questions and I…I don’t know…I just wanted to feel what it would be like to be normal, just once. I–”
She feels anger run hot in her blood, nostrils flaring as he speaks and cuts him off. “I’m not here to act as your fucking cloak of normality, Michael! Fortunately, we’ve already given the presentation.”
“What do you mean?” He asks, brows pinching together with concern.
“I mean that the need for us to continue speaking to one another is over.”
She slams the door in his face, choking back a sob.
Fuck Michael Gavey. She is so incredibly angry with him, she wants nothing more to do with him. And yet she can’t understand why it hurts so much, somehow this feels worse than what Rich had done to her.
The next few days are torturous. She avoids Michael as much as she can, sitting away from him in lectures, looking away when she catches him staring at her. Seeing him online on MSN makes her heart ache, yet she can’t find it in herself to simply block and delete him. It feels too final somehow, worsened by the fact that she stares obsessively at his username, a part of her hoping a message will pop up from him. It never does.
Life goes back to feeling bland and lonely, with nothing to look forward to anymore. She goes about her days, alone, and then sits in her room, alone.
A week later and she is back in Professor Byrne’s class, only this time she seats herself as far away from Michael as she possibly can, trying not to think about how happy she’d felt to present beside him the last time she was in this room.
“So, I hope you all enjoyed your introductory project,” she begins, as she enters the room, setting her briefcase down upon the desk at the front. “It wasn’t just an exercise in presenting what you know about the Fibonacci sequence, it was a test of how well you work in pairs. That being said, the person you worked with will also be the person you are paired with for your upcoming tutorials with me.”
Her heart sinks.
No, no, no.
Chancing a glance over at Michael, she feels herself grow hot as she sees he’s already looking at her, and she quickly turns away. She had hoped to be able to avoid him, but now would have to spend an hour in close confines with him once a week for the remainder of first year.
Her heart races for the rest of the lecture and she finds herself unable to concentrate, hurriedly packing her bag and rushing to leave the room the moment they’re dismissed.
Unfortunately, Michael has beaten her to it and is waiting for her in the corridor. She bows her head, moving to step around him, but he blocks her path.
“I’ll ask for a different tutorial partner,” he says, “you needn’t worry about having to interact with me.”
She looks up at him, her eyes wide with shock. Her throat tightens as she’s met with the sight of his baby blues, boring a hole into her. “Don’t…don’t do that. It would look bad to Professor Byrne. We can both be mature about this.”
Silently she forces away the sadness she feels at him not wanting to be partnered with her. He’s in the wrong, not the other way around, she has to remind herself.
“As long as you’re sure?” He asks, shifting from one foot to the other, clearly feeling as uneasy as she does.
“I’m sure. I’ll see you around,” she tells him, finally stepping past and walking away.
“See you tomorrow,” he calls after her.
What?!
She rifles in her bag, pulling out her freshly printed timetable.
There it is. Tutorial - 9.05 - Prof. Byrne.
Oh, for fuck’s sake.
She is filled with restless energy until the next morning. Her leg bounces involuntarily as she sits in the armchair next to Michael’s in the small, stuffy room of Professer Byrne’s office, who is seated opposite them.
Her eyes scan the shelves of books, the various notebooks that are fanned across the table, anything to avoid looking at Michael, until the older woman speaks.
“So, I hope you’ve both come with notes prepared to discuss the various ways of describing and displaying data, as discussed yesterday?”
Her face blanches. She’d been too distracted following the tutorial announcement to pay attention, and hadn’t heard her assign this. She has done no reading or note taking.
Michael glances over at her, taking in her worried expression. “Actually,” he interjects, “I think we may have misunderstood the instructions. We worked on this as a pair too, I hope you’ll forgive us just this once?”
The professor sighs, crossing her legs and tapping her pen against her pad. “Fine. Just this once. But I require individual work moving forward, you aren’t earning your degrees as a joint effort.”
“Understood,” Michael nods, rifling through his papers. “Here,” he says, leaning across and handing her a few sheets. “These are your notes.”
Slowly she takes them from him, her eyes scanning the pages, mostly graphs and tables of data, easy enough to understand and explain, without needing context.
“Thank you,” she says quietly, offering him a small smile.
The tutorial goes ahead without any further hiccups. Michael talks passionately and competently about what he’s read and the notes he’s taken, and she manages to talk through the data points he has provided her. If Professor Byrne suspects any unpreparedness, she doesn’t say.
Once it’s over and they step out into the hallway, she hands the papers back to him. “Why did you do that?” She asks quietly.
“You hadn’t prepared anything,” he says with a shrug.
“That was really nice of you.”
“It’s the least I owe you.”
“Thank you.”
He nods. “It won’t happen a second time. Come prepared next week. I want to hear what that brilliant mind of yours can come up with.”
There it is again. Brilliant mind.
She smiles at that, though her heart twists painfully in her chest as she watches him walk away. This is what she had wanted, she has to remind herself, he’d disrespected her.
Another two weeks go by, and though she is lonely it gets easier not having to avoid Michael. She finds their weekly tutorials are something she looks forward to, enraptured by how fervently he speaks about each topic, and preening with pride as he sits clearly impressed as she talks through her own notes and findings.
She misses him, though she is too proud to admit it. He had hurt her, and she’d told him to stay away. It would be humiliating to crawl back to him after that.
It’s Friday night and she’s in desperate need of a snack, so heads out of her room in the direction of the vending machines, running straight into a group of girls from her floor as they’re walking out.
Their giggles die down to silence as they see her, all offering her awkward, but obviously fake smiles.
“Not out tonight?” One of them asks, she’s fairly certain her name is Annabel, from what she’s heard in the corridors.
She shakes her head. “No, not tonight.”
“You could come out with us? We’re off to The Bull.”
She scans the faces of the other girls, all clearly less than enthusiastic about her presence, then shakes her head. “It’s okay. I’m fine.”
“Oh, darling, I wasn’t asking,” Annabel giggles, grabbing her arm.
Less than thirty minutes later she finds herself squashed around a table in The Bullingdon, next to Annabel. She recognises Felix and Farleigh as part of the group they’ve joined, all passing around Jägerbombs and cigarettes.
She feels out of place and underdressed, in jeans and a long sleeved shirt. The rest of the girls are all dressed up in colourful, sparkly eyeshadow and low cut tops.
Amidst the din of their laughter and seemingly endless chatter, set to a backdrop of ‘SOS’ by Rhianna, she can barely hear herself think. She sips anxiously at her coke, pressing her lips together and shaking her head when Annabel jiggles the 35cl bottle of vodka she’s produced from her bag, asking “want some voddy in that?”
Her focus is pulled away when she spots Michael tucked away in the corner. He’s sitting opposite the guy she saw him with on the first night, whose name she has since learned is Oliver.
Her and Michael lock eyes and he gives her a polite nod before returning his focus back to his own conversation. To be so close and yet so far from him makes her ache.
Try as she might, her gaze keeps wandering back to him, unable to focus on the people around her. She watches with keen interest as he rises from his table, headed towards the gents as Oliver makes his way to the bar.
“Olly! Olly! Over here!” Shouts Felix, and to her surprise, Oliver skulks over, with the body language of someone who’s about to ask them for spare change rather than join their group.
She raises an eyebrow as Felix shuffles over, making space for him to sit down and wonders if Michael will join them too.
Her question is answered when he returns from the toilets, giving Oliver an awkward wave which goes unanswered.
“Shit sorry,” Felix says, “are you here with your mate?”
“Nah, he’s just leaving,” Oliver says nonchalantly, accepting the shot he’s been passed.
From the way Michael bows his head and leaves the pub, she knows that’s the furthest thing from the truth, and shoots Oliver a pointed look.
“‘Scuse me,” she says quietly to Annabel, pushing out of her seat and following after Michael.
The chilly October air is biting against her skin in juxtaposition with the sticky warmth of the pub, as she attempts to follow his lanky gait.
“Michael, wait!” She calls after him, hurrying her steps to catch him up.
He stops, turning to her, a look of defeat on his face. “Go back to your mates.”
“They’re not my mates, and they’re not yours either,” she says softly. “I saw what Oliver did to you, that was out of order.”
“The closest thing I’ve felt to normal since coming here is hanging out with you,” he tells her. “The rest of them are all vapid cunts.”
“Then let’s go back to hanging out again,” she offers, stepping towards him.
“After what I did to you?” He asks, raising his eyebrows.
“I miss my friend,” she says honestly, “come on, we’ll make our own fun, we don’t need those losers.”
He laughs softly, and for the first time in weeks she feels whole again.
There’s an odd sense of coming home as she steps inside of Michael’s room, the welcoming warmth wrapping itself around her like a familiar blanket.
“There’s beer under the desk,” he tells her, closing the door behind him.
She makes her way over towards it, pausing when she sees the papers on top of it.
A First Course in Random Matrix Theory for Physicists, Engineers and Data Scientists is printed in large font on the top page, she lifts it away, seeing that on the second is a simple dedication to her.
Her heart flutters as she draws in a shaky breath. “What’s this?”
“Fuck!” He exclaims, eyes going wide as he steps towards the desk. “I hadn’t expected you to come back here. I’d forgotten I’d left this out. You said in the library a few weeks ago that you’d be keen to read my first paper when I published it. It isn’t finished, but I wanted to dedicate it you, since you made my first week here so–”
She presses her lips to his, hands reaching up to cup his cheeks as she kisses him fiercely. Michael returns the gesture, long arms wrapping around her waist and pulling her close.
“...so wonderful,” he finishes breathlessly, pressing his forehead to hers when they finally part for air.
“I look forward to reading it,” she grins up at him.
“Well, if you wanted, you could–”
“Do you really want me to read your paper right now?” She asks, gripping the front of his t-shirt and pulling him towards the bed.
“On second thoughts…”
He pulls her back in and their mouths meet again, desperate and needy as they topple onto the bed, tugging eagerly at each other’s clothing, quickly undressing each other.
Their pace slows once they are fully bare, and she runs her hands up and down the length of Michael’s sturdy back, enjoying the weight of his lithe body on top of hers.
“I missed you,” she whispers.
“I was an idiot,” he tells her, holding his weight up on his palms.
“Mmmm. The most stupid genius I know.”
He huffs a laugh. “I think I know just the thing that might cheer you up,” he tells her, moving down her body.
She props herself up on her elbows, watching with keen interest as he moves down her body, placing her legs over his shoulders once he reaches the juncture of her thighs.
He is hesitant at first, studying her closely, but then presses forward. She yelps at the sensation, all of his focus is on the bundle of nerves at the apex of her sex, and it feels electrifyingly intense with the motion in which the tip of his tongue moves against it. It’s too much.
She squirms, pushing him away with a squeal.
“Did you not like that?” He asks, seeming unsure of himself as he sits on his haunches, adjusting his glasses.
“It was a bit too much,” she admits, giggling slightly.
“Oh…sorry,” he scratches the back of his neck awkwardly, “I read you’re supposed to shape out the letters of the alphabet when you do that. I’ve always been more of a numbers man, so I went for Pi instead.”
She laughs loudly, reaching for him when he bows his head in embarrassment. “There’ll be plenty of time for that later. Right now, I just want you.”
“Come here,” she says, leaning over to rummage in her purse for a condom. “May I?”
He nods, shuffling closer as she tears open the packet. He hisses through his teeth when she wraps her hand around him. He’s warm and thick, foreskin silky smooth as she gently rubs her hand up and down the length of him, feeling every ridge and vein.
“Is this your first time?” She asks softly, as she rolls the rubber from tip to base.
“Um…yeah…is that a problem?” He asks, reluctantly meeting her eye.
“Not if it isn’t for you,” she tells him earnestly, free hand stroking his cheek. “Do you want me to go on top?”
He shakes his head. “No…no, I want to feel you.”
She smiles in understanding, laying back and coaxing him to move over her, spreading her legs to accommodate him.
He feels heavy against her entrance and she fights to resist the urge to cant her hips forward, wanting to take things at a pace he’s comfortable with.
His jaw slackens as he pushes forward, and she sighs in pleasure at the slow stretch of him bottoming out inside of her. Their breaths are hot against each other's necks as he stills, adjusting to the new sensation.
When he eventually withdraws to slowly push back in again, she moves her hips in time with his, encouraging him, and he quickly finds a rhythm. They are a clash of teeth and tongues as their mouths meet messily, hands exploring each other as the bed creaks beneath the exertion of their movements.
“F–fuck…you feel good..” he mutters, causing her to moan and her toes to curl, as he nudges against her sweet spot.
She could come from this if he keeps it up, and she can feel herself clenching around him as the beginnings of her peak approach. Right as she teeters on the edge, he groans, pulsating and spilling into the sheath that separates them.
“Sorry..” he whispers, looking at her with fogged up lenses.
“It’s okay,” she reassures him, her fingers stroking through the hair at the side of his head, brushing over the temple of his glasses. “It felt good.”
“But you didn’t…you know…”
“Plenty of time for that,” she says, pecking his lips. “Like I said, we’ll make our own fun, won’t we?”
“Get another condom then,” he says, pulling out of her. “I’ve still got some making up to do.”
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Fifth Date
Bucky and Bug’s fifth date takes an unexpected turn (alternatively: Bucky isn’t sure he’s good at dating but knows he’s good at sex so he tries to play to his strengths).
Pairing: Biker!Bucky x Bug (+ Brother’s best friend Bucky, plus sized reader)
CW: Thigh riding, risk of getting caught, dirty talk, hints of praise kink, past toxic relationships, mild angst, Bucky and Bug bond over their love of food (he’s not a feeder but he does keep you fed)
Bucky absentmindedly digs his thumbnail into the worn wood of the picnic table, working at a knot in its surface as he tries his best to gauge whether or not he’s upset you. At face value you seem fine, excited even, as you’d managed to snag a lavender oat milk ice-cream; that’s what held your attention now, well, the dripping cone and the excess amount of dogs being led around the food-truck-lined garden. But despite your oohing and ahhing over the creamy treat and the furry friends he couldn’t help the niggle of worry in his stomach.
Fucking flowers. He forgot the fucking flowers. Every other date he’d shown up right on time, if not a little early, with fresh flowers. Today his shift at the garage had run long and he’d hardly had time to scrub his hands clean and comb his hair, let alone get flowers, before rushing to pick you up, barely on time and empty-fucking-handed. Given the time between this date and the last surely the others were already shriveled up, he was supposed to be showing you how good a boyfriend he would be and he couldn’t even-
“-ucky? Buck?”
He was wrangled from his thoughts by the soft call of his name and a sudden jolt of pain as his thumb caught on a sliver of wood. There was now a furrow in your brow, lips down turned as you observed him; damnit, if the flowers hadn’t messed things up this inattentiveness surely would. “Are you alright?”
Idly reaching for your fingers not wrapped around the ice cream cone he nodded his head, “Course I am. How’s that?” Instead of answering you held the treat out for him but he shook his head, “Nah, Bug, I’d rather taste it on your lips.” And despite the small burn of embarrassment it caused, you leaned across the table, indulging him as he licked into your mouth, sticky and sweet. Bucky was relieved that you seemed happier after the kiss, he was good at that, if nothing else he could keep you physically sated. There was a time he was confident in his abilities to be good at the other stuff as well, at least he thought he was, but his last serious partner made it clear that while he was a great fuck he was a shitty boyfriend, a “sorry ass loser” to be exact, it’s what he feared you would eventually see.
“Alright Buckaroo, you are way too in your head right now, let’s go!”
Bucky went to protest before realizing you weren’t calling for an early end to the date, instead you were tugging him towards the food trucks you hadn’t yet explored. “We are dividing and conquering, I’ll grab the samosas, you’ve got the vegan corn dog truck, and we’ll rally back by the loaded waffle fries. Got it?” You didn’t bother waiting for a response as you took off, forcing him to chase after you to press cash into your palm, waving off any protests as he pinned you with a stern stare; “It’s a date, Bug, I pay. Got it?” He echoed your words back to you, but unlike you he was waiting for a response, the arch of his brow leaving no room for protest; “Got it.”
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You were pleased to see Bucky relax into the date, despite his earlier assurance that nothing was bothering him you knew better, as if you couldn’t read his moods after thirteen-some-odd-years, no, he wasn’t fooling you for a second. You were willing to wager it had something to do with work, judging by his hurried arrival and quick apologies when he picked you up, though there was always the smallest chance it had to do with club business. Despite your brother’s prominent role you tried to steer clear of that, though you would make an exception if talking about it would help Bucky. As it were he seemed considerably cheered up, happily sharing bites of the small feast you’d managed to amass, practically moaning at each new flavor that burst across his tongue (though he made sure to remind you that you were the best thing he ever tasted as he lapped powdered sugar off two of his fingers- conveniently the same two fingers that he had up your skirt on your last date).
Beyond stuffed you wave away his offer for more, something warm bursting in your chest as he offhandedly remarks something about keeping his lady fed, choosing to ignore the latter part wherein he adds a no edibles disclaimer. Is that what you are, his lady? It certainly seems like it the more dates you go on, though no official titles have been given. In some way or another you’ve felt like his for a long time, it was almost scary to face the reality of what you two could be.
Bucky could tell you were mulling something over, the tip of your tongue poking through your lips a dead give away, you’d had the same tell since childhood and he knew if he reached over and peeled apart your lips you’d be lightly biting down on the pink organ. He felt the same sharp doubt as earlier re-emerge at how quiet you’d gone, but no, you’d been having a good time he was sure of it, and he could recover from his earlier faux paus. Instead he distracted himself with the image of you, the denim of your shorts riding up between the thick meat of your thighs, nearly disappearing at the apex, the button on them now pressing tighter against the ample swell of your stomach than it had earlier, a happy sign that you’d eaten well, the soft material of your crop top inching dangerously up-up-up at each little shift you made. A man of his whims Bucky reached out, softly tracing the tip of his index finger up a spidering stretch mark, from the waistband of your shorts to wear it disappeared just beyond the hem of your top, he allowed his finger to venture just underneath it, searching, almost positive you didn’t have a bra on, desperate to find out. Desperate to trace that same mark with his tongue. Fuck you were beautiful. The soft hitch of your breath had him abruptly on his feet, gathering up trash with one hand while the other reached for you; “Let’s go for a walk, Bug.”
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He led you to a secluded area, a seemingly forgotten bench at the end of an overgrown path, surrounded by trees and wild bushes.There was extra security in knowing that the live music had just kicked up at the other end of the park, drawing much of the crowd towards the small stage but still your heart fluttered nervously, somehow knowing Bucky’s intentions were less than pure; he wasn’t just looking for a quiet place to talk.
Bucky sat first, guiding you to sit astride one of his thighs, back facing him. Whatever small ping of worry surfaced in your brain about being too heavy died before it could fully form, senses overrun by the rough feeling of his black denim jeans on the sensitive skin of your inner thighs, the cool kiss of his prosthetic hand finding purchase on the naked flesh of your waist. This is the part I’m good at, he thought, the part where I impress her, where I shine. He didn’t say anything, just began rocking his leg back and forth until your back arched, signaling he had found your sweet spot, focusing his attention on staying there. You were desperate not to make noise, biting down on your lip as Bucky’s thigh pressed the thick seam of your shorts up into you, the pressure on your clit causing pleasure to spark hot in your groin. Wrapping the hand not anchored to your waist around your throat he forced you to lean your head back against his shoulder, using the open access to run his tongue across the hyper sensitive skin, suckling, marking, claiming. It went on and on, the steady rise and fall of Bucky’s thigh as he continued his assault on your clit and throat, his own arousal at the situation apparent by the thick swell of his cock pressed into your back.
Despite your best efforts to keep quiet Bucky could tell you were getting close, stopping just when you appeared to be on the precipice of pleasure; “Fuck, Bug, you want it?”
Ignoring the question, or perhaps too focused on your pleasure to truly hear it, you pick up where Bucky left off, slowly gliding your denim covered cunt across his thigh. Rocking side to side to catch the seam just right. Close, so close, pleasure taught in your groin, ready to explode outward, ready to-
Bucky let’s out a long drawn out fuck, worried for a second he’s going to bust in his jeans as your ass backs up into him, practically slamming into his cock as your previously controlled rocking motion loses rhythm and gives way to frantic humping. Bucky slips two of his fingers into your mouth, pressing down on your tongue in an effort to quiet you; “That’s it, Baby, use my thigh, fuck yourself on my thigh, good gi-” His praise is lost in the wake of your pleasure, thighs clamping impossibly tight against his own as frantic motion mellows to soft subconscious rocking. You suckle at the salty skin of his fingers, the intensity of your orgasm leaving you soft and pliable in his lap, sleepy even.
Bucky manages not to lose it in his pants, but just barely, nuzzling at the crown of your head he feels pride- yeah, he’s good at this, he can keep you around with this.
AN: For more Bucky and Bug visit THE WORM HOLE
#bucky barnes x reader#biker!bucky#bucky barnes smut#bucky/reader#plus sized reader#brother's best friend bucky#Bucky and bug
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MDNI 18+ BLOG -> ageless blogs and minors WILL BE BLOCKED
pairing ✭ dom!seonghwa x bratty!f!reader
synopsis ✭ He told you not to wear the dress. You did it anyway. And he's not usually very forgiving.
content/genre ✭ smut 18+ MDNI
word count ✭ 2.2k
note ✭ this is lightly inspired by "worst behavior" by ariana grande
warnings ✭ name-calling (he calls mc a "whore" 😀, baby, pretty girl), grips her jaw really tight (it's made clear that it's something she enjoys), restraints (cuffs her to bed), blindfold, hwa is pretty controlling, protected sex, edging
✭✭✭✭
You were being a tease. Everyone knew it. You knew it. The whole party knew it. But not a single soul knew it better than Seonghwa.
He’d been so generous to bring you to this party. It was supposed to be a classy event–one with nice dresses and well-pressed suits. Polished shoes and fancy perfumes. And those weren’t necessarily things you lacked, but your “nice dress” of choice had certainly taken some liberties. Specifically with how impossibly short it was.
If you were being honest, you hadn’t meant to tease him per say, but you knew that, if you wore the sluttiest dress you could find, your boyfriend would want to leave early. That meant you wouldn’t have to waste a perfectly fine evening at one of his boring, posh company gatherings. He had tried to stop you, too, but you had never been a very good listener.
✭✭✭✭
As you touched up your makeup in the mirror of your boyfriend’s luxury apartment, you couldn’t help but admire the reflection. You looked incredible in your black minidress. Its lace detailing was what had originally caught your eye, and you happened to know that your boyfriend was a fan of it too. Though, maybe not for a night like tonight.
“Baby, are you almost ready?” You heard him call from the conjoined bedroom.
As you finished one last swipe of lip gloss, you called back, “Yep!”
He was smiling when he peaked his head into the bathroom, but you saw that smile immediately drop in the reflection of the mirror when he saw your outfit.
You pouted, “What?” And you turned around to face him.
“You’re not wearing that dress.” He said plainly.
With a roll of your eyes that he did not like in the slightest, you retorted, “I like it.”
“Yeah, well,” with a couple of steps in your direction, he pushed you up against the counter of the sink, the marble digging into your backside, “You look like a whore, and I don’t want my colleagues to see you like this.”
You felt giddy with pleasure at how upset he was getting, and all it took was a simple dress. Still, you kept up the annoyed act, “Well, your colleagues can keep it in their fucking pants because I’m not taking it off.”
He gripped your chin with his ring-clad hand and forced you to look him right in the face, “I don’t like this little attitude, baby. Are we gonna have a problem tonight?”
You didn’t respond. You couldn’t. You were so focused on the unyielding grip of his hand on your jaw, that all you could manage to think about was the hand dropping lower to grasp your neck. Before things could go any further, though, there was a knock at the bedroom door.
“Sir, are you ready? The car is here. And we are already running late.”
“One second,” your boyfriend responded to his assistant. Returning his attention to you, the grip on your jaw tightened, “You are so fucking lucky that we’re running late or I would punish you right fucking now.”
You swallowed hard, trying to suppress the whine that bubbled up in your throat at his words. Because, let’s be honest, there was nothing you wanted more than for him to do just that.
✭✭✭✭
The part was just as boring as you assumed it would be. Everyone was dressed for the part. A room full of rich people looking to show off their wealth. And, of course, Seonghwa was no exception to that, seeing as he’d brought his sugar baby with him, though you were certainly attracting a good bit of negative attention from the crowd.
Throughout the whole night, Seonghwa kept his hand on your lower back, dictating your every move and keeping you in his sights. Though it was clear he had additional motives. Motives fueled by the fact that he knew it drove you absolutely insane when he took control of you like that. Guiding you from person to person as he chatted away with executives from his company, always acutely aware of how you clung to him with your fingers playing with the edges of his suit jacket.
He’d occasionally pass you a flute of champagne off a tray motioned toward him by a waiter. “Thank you,” you’d whisper as the glass transferred from his hand to yours. And he would purposely brush your hand with his own as he gave you the glass.
As he talked you nodded along to his every word, not paying much attention to what came out of his mouth. Too busy absent-mindedly playing with the buttons of his shirt, occasionally slipping your hand through them to feel his chest underneath the shirt. Each time, he’d remove your hand himself and cast a glare down at you. Only for you to grin up at him with your bottom lip between your teeth.
When he finished chatting with a couple that had occupied his attention for the past half-hour, he turned his attention to you. He pulled you into his chest, it was an embrace that anyone around you would have thought was a cute romantic gesture, but you were smart enough to know that was far from the case.
“You’re really asking for it, huh baby?” he growled in your ear, his breath hot against your skin.
“Hwa,” you whined softly, “I wanna go home.” You wiggled in his embrace.
“Fine, we can go home, but I can promise you are in big fucking trouble when we do.”
✭✭✭✭
It only took two minutes from the second the car pulled up to Seonghwa’s apartment for him to be on top of you in his bed.
To your surprise things started off sweet. He kissed you softly, with his hands playing with the frills in the lace of your dress. His lips traveled from your own to your cheek and jaw. Leaving little bites in the wake of his kisses. When you gripped, his hair, your nails digging into his scalp, it was as if you’d flipped a switch in him.
He was off of you in a second, and you pouted at his departure. You propped yourself up on your elbows as you watched him slip off the bed and head to his dresser.
Your thighs rubbed together in anticipation. You watched as he stripped himself of his suit jacket, leaving him in his back dress shirt. He slid a condom into his back pocket and grabbed a pair of cuffs from the drawer along with a silk blindfold and vibrator.
When he made his way back to the bed, you made a move to take your dress off, but he stopped you. Grabbing your hair and tilting your head up to meet his eyes, “The dress isn’t going anywhere.”
“What?” Your eyes widened at that news, “Why?” you croaked out, confused.
“Well, you like it so much, don’t you baby?” You nodded hesitantly at his question, still excited for the answer, “Then I don’t see any reason why I should take it off you. I might just have to fuck you in it.”
After cuffing you to the headboard and tying the silk cloth around your eyes, you heard him shuffle around the bed. He adjusted one of the pillows under your head, “Is that comfortable?” He muttered in your ear.
“Yeah,” you breathed back. You were met with a kiss on the forehead at your reassurance. As much as you loved when he was rough with you, it was nice to always know that he genuinely did care for your well-being.
He continued to kiss down your body while his hands groped you over your dress. You were so distracted by the feeling of his lips on your skin, the heat of his mouth as he nipped at your jaw and collarbone, that you failed to notice the faint buzzing noise of the vibrator when he turned it on.
You were made aware of its presence, though, when he pressed it to your panties, making you gasp and jump up slightly. You just knew he was smirking down at you.
He just loved to watch you squirm under him. Watching you unravel without him even having to do any work.
When he held the toy to your clit over your underwear, you moaned, loud, “Hwa, oh fuck!” You wiggled your hips trying to give yourself more.
He slapped in inside of your thigh, “Move again, and I’ll turn it off.”
“Please, baby,” you whined, “I need more.”
“Oh? You think you deserve more?” He smacked your thigh again, “After how horrible you were being tonight? You're lucky I don’t just tie you up and get myself off. You don’t want that do you, baby?”
You shook your head furiously, “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, please Hwa…”
He pressed the vibe harder into your clit, circling it around, building friction between your panties and your clit. You felt your stomach tighten at the continuous motion.
He noticed that you were close, “Oh are you close?” you nodded dumbly, “Yeah? Do you wanna come, baby?”
“Yes! Please baby, please!” You could feel yourself getting closer and closer, and you were on the verge of spilling over. But it came to a screeching halt when he removed the vibrator from you entirely.
You felt your eyes well up with tears of frustration, and he noticed it, “Oh, is my baby crying? Maybe if you hadn’t acted like such a whore tonight, you could get what you want.”
“Please..” you gasped out in a broken whisper.
“Patience baby,” when he said “patience,” though, he really just meant he wanted you to beg for it he wanted you to cry under him and beg for him to fuck you.
And beg you did, as he teasingly ran his fingers over your soaked panties, you continued to whine out his name, over and over and over again. When he finally moved them aside and ran a finger through your fold, he teased you, “God, could you get any wetter? Is this all mine?”
You could barely gasp out a “yes” before his fingers were inside you. “Fuck!” you choked out as he fucked you on his hand, watching as you unraveled for a second time. “Please, Hwa! I need more! Please!”
“Oh…baby’s gonna behave now is she?”
You nodded, “I’ll be so good, please.”
“Yeah? You want my cock, baby?”
“Oh god yes! I want it so bad,” involuntarily, you rolled your hips against his hand. Resulting in another smack to your thigh. Again, he waited until you were on the verge of cumming to pull away his hand. You tried to reach out with your legs to wrap them around him, but he was already sliding off the bed. From the shuffling you heard, you could tell he was taking off his clothes. You whined at the thought, thighs rubbing together to give yourself something while he was away.
You felt his weight dip in the bed, and his hand came up to caress your cheek, “Are you ready, pretty baby?”
“Uh huh,” you nodded, “I’ve been so good. Please…”
He chuckled, sliding the blindfold off of your eyes so that it was around your neck, “Well, I don’t know about that, but your lucky that you're so fucking beautiful. And I just can’t help myself.”
He rolled the condom on as he kissed you softly. When he ran his length through your folds, you sighed at the contact. He kept kissing you as he pushed into you, slowly at first.
You gasped and arched your back, “Oh my god!” He didn’t keep the pace slow for long. You’d spent so long teasing him and playing around with him, that he was insatiably pent up. That didn’t mean he didn’t have the patience to tease you of course, but, by the time he was inside of you, both of you were at your wit’s end.
He gripped the back of your head with one hand and you hip with the other, pressing his forehead to yours as he pounded into you. Over and over and over.
“Shit, baby,” he murmured against your lips, “You keep getting tighter.”
“Oh, Hwa, I’m so close,” you croaked out, tears running down your cheeks, “Please, please, please let me cum.” Every inch of you felt hot, and your legs shook as your pleasure overtook.”
“Fuck, yeah, pretty girl. Cum around me. Shit–. I’m close to.”
Your eyes rolled back, and your jaw went slack as you came. Legs shaking without any control. You cried out his name with your chest heaving.
He pulled out of you when you finished and ripped off the condom. He groaned as he pumped his dick a few times, cumming all over your dress.
You whined as he admired the damage he’d done to the garment. “Hwa…my dress.” You pouted as he undid the restraints above your head.
“Yeah, you’re not ever wearing this fucking dress ever again.”
✭✭✭✭
note ✭ thank you so so so much to everyone who helped me choose to write this one. i struggled a bit to get it done, but i wanted to get something done before i go home this weekend 😊
if you liked it, please let me know! i absolutely love love love hearing feedback whether it be comments, reblogs, or even just a small message in my dms or inbox. i love hearing from ya'll 💗
anyways thank you for reading! love ya~
#ateez x reader#ateez smut#seonghwa x reader#seonghwa smut#seonghwa x reader smut#seonghwa#park seonghwa#seonghwa imagines#seonghwa fic#park seonghwa imagines#park seonghwa fic#ateez imagines#ateez fic#*ꔫ.ೃ࿔* ateez#*ꔫ.ೃ࿔* everyonewooeverywhere: worst behavior#*ꔫ.ೃ࿔* everyonewooeverywhere
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