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#I often don't proof read
polararts · 1 year
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The Trigun arcade art you posted yesterday is tagged as Meryl Streep instead of Stryfe, just fyi
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Oops, same ppl.
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crystalkleure · 2 years
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Say it with me, folks!
Other peoples’ interpretations of you are not your responsibility, because you cannot control them. The version of you that somebody makes up in their own mind is not your problem. Somebody incorrectly perceiving that you have done something wrong when you have not actually done that thing, or thinking you are scum-of-the-earth evil due to misinterpreting your behaviour and refusing to be corrected, means nothing because their perception of you is not aligning with reality. It is not a reflection on you, it says nothing about your actual morals. It isn’t real. Don’t beat yourself up over it.
As cheesy as it sounds, all you can do is your best. Use your own judgement, do what you think is right, do things you can feel proud of yourself for, and don’t worry about some random asshole thinking you’re Satan when you know for yourself that you are not. You could be a literal saint and there will always be some miserable fuck who’d still think up a reason to hate you, just because they enjoy being pissed off or something.
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noxtivagus · 2 years
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I LOVE FINAL FANTASY SO MUCH
#🌙.rambles#coping mechanism!!!! all left i have to do for school this week is just smth easy for math :] then after that it's the weekend n all#i will use fiction ! as an escape ! wooooo . my thoughts are suffocating. n i am so goddamn tired c:#fuck i am so tired of being trapped in my mind n being bind down by my past n everything. just everything#wait i feel like crying why is dynamis playing god i love ff sm.... i am actually crying rn it saved me. it really saved me back then. n no#i am such a goddamn slave to sentiment. to nostalgia. to memories n the past n everything i have lived through. it all means sm to me n#that's one reason why it hurts. i love it all so much but it's so fleeting it hurts.... oh this is bad i am actually crying a lot right now#how do i carry it all? how do i remember it all? i can't die i can't forget i can't deny all these bcs as much as it hurts#it reminds me that i'm alive yk? these memories these words serve as proof that. in the past. once upon a time it really was real#n the concept of reality is something i'm so weak to bcs it feels so lonely in my inner worlds#oh despite all this pain i'm still soft at heart huh. i'm crying so much.#so much thoughts i have. that i don't know how to write. but i try so much to share what i can despite how afraid i often get#when you live a life i have. in these worlds i have. in my head. it's so lonely. it's so so lonely#n. god ffxiv makes me so vulnerable in a way that. fiction is something that's. i really grew up with it being#sometimes even stronger or more present than my own reality#i've always loved the stars too. the moon. celestial beings. everything i've read in those books; whether it be fiction or non-fiction#but always. always something far from my reach. so to have something so real to be a part of#wait i'm crying even more i remember again HAHA fuck wait listening to dynamis rn is making me even more emotional#hermes as a character. i feel like he felt like he didn't belong. he wanted answers. to be understood. to understand.#n we're so similar in that regard. n i'm so weak to those sort of similarities yk? it means sm to me when i've always felt so different#ffxiv here is. it's fiction. so i can freely lose myself here. fly as high as i can without fear of. idk. maybe the#vulnerability n ephemerality of reality...? it's so beautiful. it really is n i wonder if i ever really belong there#sob i realize. there. i've been so accustomed to always reaching out futiley to something i can't have. does not exist. or yeah#reaching out to a past i cannot relive. just to remember again how it was exactly in those moments. or a future i'm uncertain of#or the present. which i'm not ever quite sure about what exactly it is. or what's going on. or myself.#understanding. understanding.... until i understand all i can of this world n finally accept that i too am living n real. i won't give up.#there's so much to life that will forever be left undone. i'll do as much as i can. so i can hold unto my humanity. unto reality. im crying#i did not expect to cry so much tonight;;; but maybe i still underestimate the pain i carry. i deserve too the kindness that i give others#because i'm human too. i'm young. n i know what that means to me. sm thoughts sm words it hurts sm im crying. but fuck that i'm still alive#i'm so confused i'm so lost. on what really is my reality. on who i am. god it's so overwhelming i don't know where to start it hurts .
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datastate · 2 years
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man. apparently i'm actually really intuitive if my dreams are worth anything O_o
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inkskinned · 1 month
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okay if you're really cool about things, i can be honest with you. before you read further, decide if you're a girl's girl. if you're cool and actually cool or like not cool.
men don't talk in my book because i was fuckken tired of the way they're the center of every fucking story. i was tired of how every story takes a moment to let them talk. men can shut up for literally one fucking book.
unfortunately not everyone is cool. professionally what i usually say is i didn't want to add violence to the world. the only men in my book are abusers, so they don't get to talk. they don't get to take up space. they ruined my life, they don't get to have their words echo anymore.
because like, yeah! you find practically any story about a person surviving trauma and... there's a man at the center. men are often rescuing us from these things. a "good man" is always standing around, being a good man, proving to the victim that good men are the real men. that her experience was unique rather than universal.
the redacted text has not been taken well by all of my early readers. there is this weird, crouching growl that keeps occurring with men-of-a-certain-age. why don't we hear his side of the story?
when i sat down to write everything that happened to me, i couldn't look at the frank brutality of my abuser's words on a page and think to myself: i actually let him speak like that. i had to redact his words from the manuscript. i then left it redacted. no victim is going to read this book and hear the person who hurt them. it is a book for the victims to speak. abusers shut up challenge, forever. for eternity.
my father once told me, chuckling, i should just have a page of redaction where i let the man just finally talk. it is funny to joke about how we should make a whole page in my book about a man that hurt me. this was not the only time someone commented - it feels like you're hiding things. how do i know you're actually a victim if he doesn't get to speak?
there are books where women aren't even present. i even genuinely like some of those books. like, who doesn't like the hobbit?
i keep running into people defending this imaginary man. the default narrative is so true to some people that they will defend any man, just by virtue of the assumption - "if he's acting like that, you had to push him." certain people need definitive proof that you didn't accidentally make your partner into an abuser. they need to decide if you deserved it, because they want to be able to judge you.
which makes sense, i guess, from a hind brain perspective. if you can figure out "why" someone was cruel, you can protect yourself against it. if you defend the bully, the bully might side with you. i don't really know their explanation for feeling this about a character in a book. trust me, i wrote the guy. he is not going to protect you.
i guess i just - there was a time in my life where i desperately wanted anyone to defend me. where i could have really used someone saying holy shit are you okay instead of what did you say to make him act like that to you.
instead, over dinner, a friend-of-a-friend i just met is pouring herself wine. i heard you wrote a book, she says. she gives me the kind of chilly smile i associate with knives. i heard it's unfair to men.
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hedgehog-moss · 7 months
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Pampérigouste escaped today and I almost didn't make a post about it because it's just more of the same isn't it? do people who read this blog really want to hear about yet another Pampe escape? Then I thought, that's like asking if people who read detective novels really want to hear about yet another mysterious murder. Probably yes. Also Pampe would have been offended to have such a successful escape go unreported.
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I would like to say that my new fence is still fully Pampe-proof. She has not escaped a single time through breaking or outsmarting the fence, so now she does it by outsmarting me. Which doesn't happen all that often, because we are intellectual equals. But I let my guard down this morning—I'd just peeled some greenhouse carrots to make purée and I went into the pasture to distribute the peelings even though it was raining (see how I got punished for my selflessness?), and I left the gate open because I was right in front of it, obstructing it with my body.
Pampe dropped her carrot peelings and acted like she couldn't find them even though they were right under her feet, so I took pity on her and crouched down to gather them and offer them to her again (see how I'm getting punished for my compassion??) and she took advantage of this diversion. In the span of 0.2 seconds she slithered around me and she was out. It was a little bit beautiful. I don't know if you remember this photo of Pampe & Pyrgus, but it's a perfect illustration of what happened:
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I sighed and ignored her and finished distributing the peelings to the other animals, and then went to the barn to get muesli to lure my nuisance back to her pasture. After escaping she initially ran towards the woods, but since I ignored her the whole time, she emerged from the woods when I returned, like, wait, did you notice I escaped? Behind your back, just earlier? Did you notice how I won and you lost?
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It shouldn't have been difficult to get her back into the pasture with the help of her favourite snack; unfortunately Pampoldine is still a big baby who was distraught that her mum had left her behind yet again (she should be used to it, honestly, it's been like this since she was an infant), she started making these little panicky noises that Pampe has never paid any attention to—
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—so when I propped the gate open with a branch to get Pampe back inside, Poldine hurried out instead. I wasn't expecting this, I thought it was clear that I had the situation under control and her mum would be back in 5 seconds. You could have just waited 5 seconds, Poldine.
Pampelune had no interest in escaping, but she's the matriarch and where her herd goes, she goes, so once the other two were out she barrelled past me as well. I opened the gate to bring 1 llama in and instead 2 llamas went out. Pirlouit besides me was like
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For some reason the llamas galloped towards the road, instead of just hanging out in the woods where there's stuff to eat. Maybe because Pampe hadn't gone out in a long time and she wanted to be admired for her feat. Her wish was granted—2 cars stopped to say hi as I was miserably trotting after my llamas on the road in the rain. One of them was the post office lady who once herded my animals out of a pasture with her car, and she was like hop in, it'll be like old times!!!
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The two people who stopped their car were enchanted with the encounter and they both told me that they missed the days when Pampe Sightings on this road were a regular thing. No one sides with my fence in the Pampe v. Fence conflict. I love the post office lady though, she had a Niagara song playing in her car when I got in and a minute later I muttered "I'll sell her to the butcher" and she started singing "Pampe ♪ Je vais devoir te vendre au boucher ♫" to the tune of that song. It fit the tune really well, too.
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After we managed to get the llamas off the main road and back in the woods, she was like, godspeed, I wish I could continue chasing them with you but I have to go make lunch for my kids. I told her that now that the llamas were no longer on the road I'd just let them roam, they'll come home before night, no way I'm going to chase after them in the woods in this dog weather. So I went home and grumpily resumed peeling carrots and potatoes for my mash.
I sat in front of the window to do it so I could keep an eye on Pirlouit, who was wandering around the pasture like a cursed soul, drenched with rain, lonely and llamaforsaken. Sometimes he brayed to try and guide his friends back home, wherever they were, but he never brayed while I was filming. His braying is a poignant display of emotion and is not for public consumption.
I figured, if the llamas come back Pirou will spot them and perk up his immense ears, and I'll know to go out and open the gate. Instead at some point I looked up from my potatoes and saw my donkey finally at peace, grazing rather than pacing restlessly, and I went to look outside and his friends were back! And so was his appetite.
I had new peelings + some muesli to offer, but of course Pampe could tell this offering was a crude and blatant trap and refused to fall for it. Meanwhile her innocent daughter was like yay, snacks :) and followed me in the pasture, a llama entirely devoid of wiles.
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After I got Poldine back inside I went like WELL since NOBODY else wants that delicious MUESLI I guess these deserving chickens can have it—and Pampe was here in the blink of an eye to shoo the hens away from her muesli.
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She was grudgingly smiling about it, too. Like, point for you.
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I love this pic where my chicken looks like she's herding the animals back in their pasture all by herself.
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Everyone is home! Pampe and Pandolf are walking away in search of new adventures, Poldine follows her mum because of her abandonment issues, and Pirlouit is also following everyone very closely, like, I'm not getting left behind again.
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I finally managed to cook my mashed carrots & potatoes (+ herbs from the greenhouse) and it's so nice to make food with nothing but ingredients you grew yourself! (To be completely honest I only managed to grow 3 carrots in the past few months but that's because I neglected them in pursuit of more flashy summer vegetables)
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I also had an apple-plum compote for dessert made with my own fruit <3 Okay, the cheese course in between was store-bought. One of my friends really wants me to get goats and be self-sufficient in cheese and when I told her I would be constantly chasing my goats over hill and dale because they have a reputation to be insufferable escape artists she was like, what difference will it make to your life...
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wongyuuu · 1 month
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calendar | csc
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pairing: seungcheol x f!reader genre: smut word count: 3.1k summary: the red mark on the calendar is one of seungcheol's favorites warnings: minors do not interact, kissing, stimulation, swearing, petnames, penetrative sex, unprotected sex (don't do this), oral (f. receiving), breeding kink, cock sleeve (kinda), dirty talking playlist: ➝ here a/n: still a little (a lot) insecure about smut, but wanted to try writing this one. not proof read
please remember that comments and reblogs are extremely important
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seungcheol stopped in front of the calendar in the closet, a smile tugging at his lips. the red circle around the date, signaling an important event he always waited a little more anxiously for. 
not that having sex with his wife was something he couldn't do as often as he liked, far from that. if anything both of you were always eager to be with each other, even after so many years together. it had never gotten boring or dull at any moment. both of you always wanted to try new things and keep it interesting, mostly you. for seungcheol being buried deep inside you while you moaned his name was to closest thing he'd ever to heaven, if such a place even existed. 
he gave up on the shirt, knowing fully well what the sight of him in nothing but sweats did to you. pair it with his wet hair and it was enough to drive you crazy. the good thing about being with someone for so long is knowing exactly what ticks the other person off, and what buttons to press. well, it could be both a blessing and a curse. in that moment seungcheol chose to believe that it was solely a blessing. 
a small groan left his lips at the sight of you lying on your stomach, scrolling through your phone, in his shirt and black pair of panties — the one he bought you after there was a small accident with a few pieces of underwear. 
the thing about ticks and buttons is that it works both ways and, obviously, seungcheol wasn't the only one who could play that game. 
he crawled on top of you slowly and pushed your hair to the side so he could kiss the nape of your head. you sighed in contentment when you felt his weight on top of yours. 
"look," you said, raising your phone slightly "hannie sent me pictures of his daughter today"
seungcheol looked at the smiling face of his friend with a little girl in his arms. it had been many years since he had seen jeonghan look quite that happy. of course that suddenly finding out about a child and suddenly needing to be a full-time dad wasn't the easiest thing in the world but he was playing it like a breeze. you swiped your finger and a picture of the little girl in a bright yellow dress greeted him. seungcheol smiled. yeah, she was cute and looked every bit like jeonghan, acted too. a little menace, she was.
"what does he want? if he's sending pictures he wants something" he chuckled knowing his friend well. everything jeonghan did had a purpose.
seungcheol sat back on his heels and slowly started to massage your shoulders over the fabric of the shirt. 
"he asked if we can have gia tomorrow night, he has a work thing to go" you moaned lowly when seungcheol pressed on the not in your shoulder blade, "i said yes"
he laughed again. of course you had been quick to agree, it didn't surprise him. you had always loved kids and were always happily willing to have them for any amount of time needed. after you had gotten married it had gotten a little more frequent since most of your friends had decided to have kids at the same, and since jeonghan found out about his daughter it had gotten weekly. seungcheol never complained, he too loved kids and liked having them around, he especially loved the glint in your eyes whenever you looked at them running around the living room, breaking a thing or two.
"cheol" you said one day at the darkest hour of the night after rolling around in bed for hours, voice barely a whisper as you played with his hair "i... should we start trying?"
it was too late, his mind was barely working, almost drowning in sleep for him to understand what you were saying but in hindsight, he should have seen it coming.
"trying what?" he asked turning around and wrapping you in his arms, his leg nesting between yours.
"for a baby"
that was how the calendar ended up hanging on the closet wall. your ovulation period was marked in a bright red marker. 
"do you think it's really work or, maybe, a date?" you asked.
slowly seungcheol moved his hand lower, to the small of your back, pressing a little more tenderly where he knew you struggled with pain. he moved your, his, shirt up,  adding a little more pressure as your body fully relaxed under him.
"jeonghan wouldn't date now," he said "gia is still getting used to him and us, he wouldn't add someone else to the mix"
you turned around under him, eyes narrowed. when you raised your arm to rest it under your head your shirt lifted a little, exposing the skin right over the elastic of your underwear. it was pretty, yes, with lace details on the sides but that mattered very little. seungcheol was far more interested in what was hidden under it. 
"you're telling me that jeonghan hasn't fucked anyone since we got gia? a whole seven months ago"
seungcheol placed his hands on your waist, your skin warm under his touch. the corner of your lips tugged up at the expression in your husband's eyes. he was struggling to keep focus on the conversation both of you were heaving. jeonghan and gia were the least of his worries. 
"i care very little about who jeonghan fucks" he said, voice hoarse as he leaned forward at the same time he pushed your shirt further up "all i care about is putting a baby in my beautiful wife"
he pressed a kiss to your naked skin. he had imagined it many times, you pregnant with his kid, your belly around. it had been one of the many reasons why he had woken you up in the middle of the night and fucked you dumb. he had never said anything, choosing to let you decide when it was time. when you were ready to have a baby. seungcheol knew that it was going to change things for you a lot more than it would for him, it was also your body. 
if it were up to him, you'd have a least two kids running around the house. 
"you have some work to do then," you said, laughing. 
almost like a reflex, you tangled your fingers in his hair. you sighed as seungcheol started his exploratory kisses. some were light, like the touch of a feather, loving, in a worship manner. others were the exact opposite, harsher as he pulled your skin in between his teeth just for a second, to later soothe the spot with the tip of his tongue. he loved to leave tiny marks in your body, where no one else would be able to see them but him. but you knew they were there, it was a constant reminder of the night before and a reminder of what was still to come.
you spread your legs to better accommodate seungcheol as he pushed your shirt to your neck.  you felt a little electric tension run over your skin when you noticed his eyes on you, taking in your every expression. you smiled when he pressed his thumb over your hard nipple, pinching it.
seungcheol took your boob into his mouth, biting your nipple at the same time he pinched the other one. involuntarily your back arched, your grip on his hair tightening.
he loved the sounds you made, how it usually started so low and small but he always managed to work you up enough to get you begging under him, on top of him. either way, you'd end the night pleading for him, for his cock.
"do you think today is the day?" he asked, trailing his kisses again down your stomach to your panties "do you think i can pump you full enough to get you pregnant?"
you expected seungcheol to tug at the sides of your panties and pull them down but instead, he kissed you over them. he grinned when he saw the small wet spot in your underwear. 
"i barely started and you're already wet, baby?" he teased.
he ran his finger over your cunt still covered by the thin panties. your hips twitched under his touch, needing more than just light touches. but you weren't ready to give in to him yet. he was going to have to work harder if he wanted to hear you begging for more.
"not a word? playing hard to get tonight, i see" he pushed your underwear to the side, lightly blowing your clit. he had to contain the laugh that erupted in his chest "let's see how long it lasts"
you raised your hips as seungcheol used his index fingers to pull your panties down. you laughed when you saw the small piece of cloth being thrown over his shoulder. your laughter died as soon as you felt his warm, wet, tongue on your clit. he sucked the small bundle of never into his mouth at the same time he pushed two fingers into you. he was relentless, his pace devastating, not giving you a second to breathe.
the sounds, of his mouth on you as well as the wetness of your pussy, were obscene but they turned you on even further. you wanted, needed, more.
and the thing is, seungcheol was the giving kind of partner. whatever you wanted was yours, but you had to say it, loud and clear. for him.
"come one baby, just ask" he blew your clit again, this time using the tip of his thumb to lightly brush it "use your pretty little mouth and beg for me"
a curse left your lips when his fingers stopped moving and he pulled away from you. your orgasm that was right there, around the corner, suddenly gone, leaving only your throbbing cunt and ragged breathing as a witness. 
you tried to grab his hand and push his fingers back but the was being a little shit, holding it behind his back.
"fuck, seungcheol," you said, partially annoyed, and desperately turned on "just eat me out, fuck me with your fingers. whatever you do just make me cum"
"your wish, wife, is always my command"
seungcheol wasted no second. his lips were around your clit and a third finger was added into to slit. it only took a few pumps for you to come undone under him. a mess of moans and curses. unsure of when exactly you had let go,  your hand gripped his hair again, forcing his head closer to you, grinding his face against you, desperate for everything he had.
seungcheol used the edge of the mattress to apply some pressure on his throbbing cock. he was so hard it was painful so whatever friction he could get was welcomed. 
every single one of your moans were met a stroke of his tongue and a pump of his fingers. it was torture, the most delicious and vicious kind of torture.
seungcheol only leaned back when he felt the shake in your legs subside, crawling back you. he pressed his thumb in your mouth, smiling when you opened and sucked him in. you were the most beautiful thing in the world, with your cheeks painted in a bright shade of pink, and two tear stains on the sides of your eyes. god, he loved you. 
you could taste your own release in his finger when you circled his finger with your tongue. you grazed his skin with your teeth looking into his eyes. seungcheol hissed, wishing that it was his cock in your mouth.
"i know you would love it if i sucked you," you said "but i really need you to fuck me, right now, please"
you were going to be the death of him.
you pulled your shirt over your head and turned around, sticking your ass up while your chest was pressed against the pillow.
for a second seungcheol felt like a teenager who just found out he was about to fuck the hottest girl he had ever laid eyes on. he was quick to push his sweats off. he hadn't bothered with boxers, knowing exactly where the night would lead the two of you.
"i'm going to fill you up so good baby" he squeezed your ass and second later slapped it "so so deep there's no way you won't get pregnant tonight"
he ran his tip over your pussy a few times, coating himself in you. he knew that he could slide in without doing it but he also liked torturing you. your moans got a little more desperate every time rubbed against your clit.
whenever he took you bare the sensation was entirely new and different. yes, there were a few instances when both of you were in too much of a hurry, or sometimes it just didn't matter enough, to care or remember to take a condom, but ultimately both of you had always been careful. you took your pills, he carried a condom and life moved on. but even after months of no condom, no barrier at all between the two of you, seungcheol still felt his head get a little dizzy. 
your walls adjusted perfectly to him, clinging around him, pulling him, demanding every single inch of him. he slowly pushed in until all he was deep into you, to the hilt.
you moaned against the soft fabric of the sheets, loving the burning sensation of the stretch. you pushed your ass high in the hair, wiggling it from side to side begging him to just move. the stretch of his dick deliciously painful still.
"cheol, move" you begged.
"this what you want?" he asked 
seungcheol pushed your head further into the mattress, his hand on the back of your head, thighing your hair around his fist. finally he started to move, he pulled his cock all the way out and pressed it back in, hitting that one spot that made your head spin and little stars shine behind your closed eyes, over and over again. you squirmed when seungcheol pressed his weight over your body, moaning as he somehow got even deeper.
you moved your hand down your body, slowly circling your with the tip of your nail.
"cheol, fuck" you bit the pillow "faster, please, just fuck me"
he loved the neediness in your voice, how you completely forfeit with your no-begging police. the smell of your sweet vanilla soap disappeared now that your skin was coated in a thin layer of sweat. 
seungcheol didn't change his rhythm, knowing that it was enough to drive you crazy and over the edge.
"are you touching yourself, baby?" he pulled on your hair, giving you a taste of your medicine. his dick throbbed when he saw the smile on your face "fuck"
he reached forward, slapping your hand away from your cunt. you cursed at him but the nasty words were quickly replaced with a moan when he pinched your clit, tugging and pressing, driving you fucking crazy on his dick. even so, his pace was slow.
"cum for me, baby" he whispered. 
"let me ride you" you begged "i want to look at you when you breed me"
your words had always been the ruin of him. he almost came right there. he turned you around and sat on the bed, grinning when you cried when his dick left your pussy.
"i know, baby, but you were the one that wanted to ride me"
a small fuck you left your lips as you crawled on top of him. seungcheol moaned when you gripped him, your hand sliding up and down his length while you grazed his tip with your nail lightly. you aligned him to you and sank down in one swift movement, making both of you moan.
seungcheol was wrong, being balls deep into you wasn't paradise. no. paradise was being balls deep in your cunt while you rode him, tits bouncing in in his face, while you moaned his name again and again like a prayer, taking what you wanted from him. he cupped your breasts in his hands. your hands covered his, forcing your nipples between his fingers and squeezing. 
"fuck. cheol" you said, eyes on his as you circled your hips before thrusting down on him again "i'm gonna cum. i need to"
your walls squeezed around him. seungcheol moaned as he held you by the hips holding you in place, while the pounded into you, finally, finally fucking you as fast and as hard as you wanted. he fucked you roughly, watching as his cock disappeared in your cunt, each thrust deeper than the previous one. seungcheol felt the muscles of his thighs and stomach squeeze at the same time you clenched around him, milking him.
he pressed his thumb to your clit and the scream you let out was enough to drive both of you to the edge. you let your body fall forward, and you bit that spot between his shoulder and neck. seungcheol continued to pound into you, fucking his cum as deep as he could, pushing it further into you making sure not even a drop was wasted. 
it took both of you a couple of minutes to settle down, evening out your breathing, and making sure your legs were no longer shaking.
"seungcheol" you cried, finally looking at his face, kissing him, letting him invade your mouth with his tongue "i'm so full. it's so deep"
he could never, ever, get enough of you.
“don’t move baby, let’s make sure this one sticks”
you kissed the side of his neck, feeling his hot cum inside you while his dick slowly got flaccid. you loved to have him in you, just there, with you, as close as humanly possible, with nothing between the two of you. his personal cock sleeve, he had called you a few times.
“you say it like fucking me is a terrible task someone assigned you”
you felt the vibrations of his laughter before you heard it. you just closed your eyes and pressed your head to his chest, the sound of his heartbeats calming like a lullaby.
“fucking you is the one task i’ll never ask someone else to do in my place”
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samsno1 · 4 months
Text
Celebrating
Dean Winchester x F!Reader
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hi, heres what i promised to the dean girls! i don't know what to say, this is long and i don't know if the smut is good enough, might edit later, also, dean in this red jacket is my favorite
Summary: It had been a while since you got some and at night of celebrating a successful hunt you expected to finally, after a long time, get laid
Warnings: SMUT, piv, unprotected sex (wrap it up), finger sucking, jealousy (? if you squint), oral f. recieving, fingering, dean is so in love ohmygod, english is not my first language, not proof read (if i forgot anything let me know)
Read it on AO3
WC: 4.7k
You can learn how to change Y/N for your actual name here
enjoy!
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It was difficult for you to find anyone willing to spend the night with you in the current settings of your life, having to lie about what you do, who you are…Basically create a whole new personality just to be able to bring someone to your motel room. In that sense, it was frustrating, both sexually and mentally to be put in this scenery but, either way, saving lives was more important than getting laid, even if you were thoroughly stressed beyond comparison by your inability to find a guy (or girl). 
You, Sam and Dean had gone to California for what you discovered, after great questioning and piles of research, was a simple salt ‘n burn of a poor ghost of a roadkill and was haunting that particular highway and crashing trucks of drivers who were mildly intoxicated behind the wheel.
After finding out where the bones were buried you went to the cemetery and started digging up the grave. Shovel after shovel of dirt fell behind you while you panted in exhaustion until you hit something hard at the bottom of the hole you dug up.
You harshly broke the wooden casket, revealing the remains of the ghost and a putrid smell hit your nose like everytime it happened when you had a salt ‘n burn. You scrunched up your nose and threw the shovel on the ground beside you, reaching with a hand towards Dean for him to help you get out of the hole.
“There it is.” You say proudly as you stare down at the decomposed body being covered with salt by Sam while Dean reaches for the alcohol in the bag and the lighter in his pocket.
You three watch as the bones light up in an orange fire, burning away what’s tying the poor soul to this world, the heat radiating in your skin. After some time you bump your shoulder with Dean’s, making him look at you.
“Let’s go, I need a shower so we can go out and celebrate” You say with a grin as you turn back to walk towards the Impala and Dean follows suit along with Sam, the fire slowly extinguishing itself behind you.
You opened the door to the backseat, the creaking of the hinges echoing through the night, getting inside and closing the door with a thud. Dean and Sam sat in their designed seats at the driver and shotgun, respectively, and you drove into the night towards the motel.  
“I saw a bar not far from where we are staying” Dean said and you hummed and Sam nodded. “You two might have to come back alone, you know” He suggested with a smirk and Sam scrunched his nose and let out an amused huff and you chuckled dryly, a weird nausea bubbling in your stomach.
Deep down you wished Dean could see you the way he sees the bartenders and strippers in bars or clubs you three often go to. You didn’t know if he thought you were too rough, too scarred, both mentally and physically. You usually dressed up nice, using makeup from time to time when you noticed your eyebags were getting darker or when your lips looked too pale. You also tried your best with clothing, well, the best someone could do when you were a hunter. Either way, you never looked like those girls, they were absolutely stunning, even for you, and you couldn’t compete with them.
You shook your head. You were probably thinking these things because it had been some time since you last got laid. Tonight was your night, you were feeling it, you were taking someone to your room.
Dean turned the car off after parking and you got out, going to the trunk to get your bag.
“You guys meet me in my room? I’ll most likely take longer to get ready” You said with a grin and the boys nodded. You took out the keys to your room and got in, throwing your bag over your bed and going to another bag you had in your room, where you kept your “fancy” clothes and makeup.
You took out a beautiful black dress with long sleeves that ended in your mid thighs. It was a dress you thrifted when you went on a hunt alone a while ago and never had the opportunity to use it. When you tried it on, though, it hugged your curves in all the right places, made your body look amazing and you felt as confident as one could feel.
You left the dress over the bed and rushed to the bathroom to take a shower, smiling to yourself. You took your time, washed your hair thoroughly and finished it off in the usual way. In the hunting life you often get your hair very dirty almost everyday with blood, dirt, ectoplasm…you name it. So, keeping it lucious and healthy was a process that you grew fond of doing to recollect some of that normalcy that hunting didn’t give you.
You came out of the shower with a towel wrapped around your body and picked up an underwear set that was, well, sensual to say the least and dropped the towel to the ground to put it on, the dress going over it, careful not to mess up your hair in the process.
You looked at yourself in the mirror and whistled in surprise at your own appearance, you looked good. Time for makeup.
You didn’t do much, a simple concealer, contour and blush with mascara and a smokey eye was enough to drop any man to the ground.
You decided to put shoes on because, first, if you really had to walk back, heels weren’t helpful, second, you didn’t have your heels with you at the moment.
While you were finishing up you heard a knock on your door. You opened it and there they were, Sam and Dean, practically on the same looks, just cleaner, waiting for you.
They both eyed you up and down, drinking your appearance in, Dean dropping his jaw slightly as he stared at your exposed thighs. Sam let out an impressed sigh and cleared his throat.
“Wow Y/N you look…amazing” He said and you smiled, looking down, feeling a tad bit embarrassed.
“Yeah…” Dean agrees, half on earth, half in his head trying to get rid of the thoughts of those beautiful legs wrapped around his neck while his nose deep into your–
“Well, thank you, I hope it isn’t too much.” You said.
“No, n–no, ha, it’s not, at all,” Dean said to quickly, finally grasping the courage to look into your eyes, the beautiful colors drowning him and your shy smile making him want to smash his lips to yours that moment. He cleared his throat. “Shall we go?” He offered.
“Yes, let me just get my phone” You said and went inside for a couple seconds, coming out with it and your wallet. “C’mon!”
You passed through them and went towards the car. Sam elbowed Dean to make him turn to him.
“You are staring at her like she’s a cheeseburger and you haven’t eaten in days, man” Sam teased and Dean frowned at him “You were practically drooling”
“I–I was not, okay? She just looks…pretty, that's all” Dean said, ignoring Sam’s ‘Yeah, right’ and going to the driver's seat in the Impala, you already sat down in the backseat. After Sam got in you all went to the bar and you felt particularly excited this time.
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“Okay, every single one who tried to flirt with me was a disaster” You said, coming back to the table with a sigh, Sam and Dean almost laughing at you as you handed them their beers. “Seriously, who do I have to kill to get laid in this shit”
You took a swig of your beer and looked around once more, trying to find a decent man for you to take back tonight when you eyed a handsome black haired guy a few feet away. You smiled to yourself and got up from your seat.
When you walked up to him you didn’t see it but Dean was fuming with jealousy, this feeling bubbling up inside him that made his fists unconsciously clench over the table. He tried flirting with other women that night, chatting them up like he usually did but it all went down the drain the moment his eyes darted to you again, a guy practically snuggling up to you while you gently pushed him away and refused his advances, either not finding him attractive or just not feeling a spark.
He should be the one you looked at, he knew everything about you, how you liked your coffee, your favorite drinks, the faint lines that would appear around your lips when you smiled, the way your eyes lit up when you were talking about something you enjoyed. He knows you.
Sam noticed his brother’s demeanor and called out to him to snap him out of his jealous haze. Dean turned his eyes to Sam and he had this stupid smirk on his face, sipping the beer once again to hide his amused smile.
“What?” Dean snapped, his hand wrapping around the bottle, the cool glass doing nothing to ease his temper down, his knee going up and down under the table with nervousness.
“Nothin’” Sam answered and finished his beer, getting up and leaving a couple dollars, enough to pay for the beers he drank. “I’m going back, y’know, tired. Tell Y/N”
Dean nodded, he didn’t know if Sam meant for him to tell you that Sam went back or that you’ve been in his dreams for months now, not all of them cute and fluffy, some made him wake up with a hard-on, sweating and longing for you.
He looked in your direction and you were coming back with an annoyed face, arms crossed in front of you, feet stomping the ground. Dean made a confused face and when you got back to the table you sat down on the chair with a scoff, his eyes never leaving you.
“He has a girlfriend” You murmured and then realized you were one man short “Where’s Sam?”
“He called in, tired” Dean said and you hummed. He had a weird look on his face, something you couldn’t make out what was. You sighed and looked down.
“I think we should go too, this night was disappointing to me” You breathed out a laugh “I’m impressed you didn’t find anyone, I saw some girls eyeing you”
“Nah, I’m fine,” He said and finished his beer. You widened your eyes at him but didn’t say anything, just nodding hesitantly in shock. “Let 's go?”
He said getting up and you mirrored him, pulling your dress down a bit, Dean’s eyes on you all the time. He bit his lower lip and mentally told himself to cool it.
As you two walked towards the car you couldn’t help but look at him up and down, silently appreciating his figure. His strong jawline, his green eyes now dark thanks to the night, his slightly crooked nose that made him look unique.
When you got into the car, in silence, you drove back to the motel and you felt an unmistakable tension in the air and you were worried you might’ve done something to upset the man. You started to fidget with your fingers over your lap, the street lights going past the car through the window as Dean sped up through the pavement.
His hands gripped the wheel, holding back the urge to pounce on you right there and then. When he parked the car and reached for the door handle you held his wrist.
“Wait! Dean, is something the matter?” You asked, big eyes looking into his as he looked at you, noticing the trouble behind those beautiful orbs. He wanted to punch himself in the gut for making you feel bad. “What happened?”
“Nothing it’s just…” He trailed off and looked at your hand wrapping his wrist. His other hand enveloped over it and your skin flared up with goosebumps. He felt warm, rough, his strong grip comforting. You took your hand away from his wrist, allowing his hand to wrap over your and pull you into him.
You yelped and was about to question him when you felt his plump lips against yours, his other hand hesitantly holding your cheek and you melted. It took you a while to process what was happening. Dean Winchester is kissing you. Though, when you did, your free hand went to the back of his neck to deepen the kiss.
Everything felt like a fever dream and you were afraid that if you pulled away you’d wake up and Dean would be gone. His lips had a taste of beer lingering from the night out, they were full and smooth. You felt like you were drowning in this feeling until Dean pulled away, seeking a breath of air.
You looked between his eyes, your breaths molding into each other from the closeness. You moved the hand he was holding up his chest, to his shoulder, up to his cheek, his eyes closing and his head snuggling against your hand, his fingers fidgeting around your wrist.
He opened his eyes, a thousand feelings swimming behind his green orbs as you both communicate in silence, an agreement, a revelation. You smiled and pulled him in again, this time with no hesitation. His hand went down your arm slowly, your skin warming up where his hand passed by, and settled by your waist, pulling you closer. His tongue teased your bottom lip and you eagerly opened your mouth with a low moan.
At that, he smirked into the kiss and pulled you over his lap, the steering wheel digging into your back, his hands both placed at your hips as you unconsciously rocked against him. He let go of your mouth again and you stared down at him.
“I wanted to do this so bad” He whispered and you smiled, your fingers playing with the hair at the nape of his neck mindlessly. He placed a loving kiss at your jaw and pulled away again while you hummed, content.
When you looked at his face again there was a frown and he was avoiding your eyes. You grabbed both his cheeks and made him look at you.
“What was that thought, hm?” You ask lightly as to not push him away. You didn’t want this to end, not ever. He seemed nervous.
“What does this mean to you?” He asked and you furrowed your eyebrows. “To me, Y/N,” he continued, his hands rubbing up and down your thighs “you’re everything, I mean, you– you’re perfect. You’ve seen everything I’ve done and never let me down, you’re beautiful and so much more. If to you I’m just a way to get off then–”
You cut him off with a peck on his lips.
“Stop. Right there.” You started, looking deep into his eyes. “Dean I– you are everything I’ve ever wanted, needed. You mean more to me than words can describe, you’re not just a one night stand, you’re my dream”
When you finished, he didn’t waste a second to wrap a hand behind your neck and steal your lips again, his mouth addicting. There was so much passion, feeling and desire pumping through your veins.
Your dress was high on your thighs and one of his hands squeezed the flesh hungrily, making you groan in his mouth. He went further with his hand, his thumb caressing over your covered sex and you opened your mouth in a whimper.
Dean attacked your neck with kisses and hickeys, his teeth leaving a pattern over your skin as his hand ghosts over where you need him the most.
“Dean…” You say, a beg behind your words and he pulls away, both his hand and his mouth, making you shiver from the lack of contact and the cool feeling his saliva left behind over your neck.
“Sweetheart, as much as I’d like to have you in the car,” He said, his voice rough and deeper with lust, his pupils wide as he opened the door, a cool breeze coming in that did little to nothing to cool your skin off. “you deserve a bed, another time” He finished, leaving an open mouthed kiss under your ear.
Another time. You nodded, words failing you as you stepped out of the car, adjusting your dress and hair the best you could to seem decent. Dean stood up behind you and let a hand linger on your waist, eager to touch you at all times and all ways.
You both walked towards the door of your room, Dean’s fingers tightening on your skin the longer it took for you to get the door open. The moment you were able to open it, he pushed both of you in, turning you around and pinning you to the door inside, closing it with a loud noise behind your back and his lips were on your again, his hands roaming over every inch of your skin.
You yelped in shock but soon reciprocated the touches and kisses, your fingers wrapping around his jacket and pulling it off, his hands momentarily leaving you to drop it to the ground. When his hands came back he grabbed both your legs and lifted you, forcing you to wrap your legs around his hips for support, his fingers digging into your skin yet again.
Your hands pulled on his hair, your tongues battling in a messy kiss when you feel your body move to the bed, your body being gently placed over it.
Dean pulled away, standing up fully and you took him in with a bite of your lip. He unbuttoned his flannel, slowly and you lifted your dress over your hips, lifting them off the bed to help, revealing your panties and over your head to take it off completely and throwing the fabric away.
Dean’s breathing got heavier, the confine of his pants bothering him as he finally discards the flannel, torso naked to you. You drink his defined physique with hooded eyes and he smirks down at you, his head going close to the waistband of your panties, eyes never leaving yours as he leaves kisses from your hips to your stomach to the valley of your breasts until he came face to face with you again, a smile lingering in his lips making one of your own appear on yours.
Your hands grab at his cheeks and pull him in again as he holds you by your waist, pulling your near naked torso into his. His fingers ghost over every inch of new exposed skin as if he was memorizing every atom of your being like you were going to disappear.
Your hands start to explore over his chest, the strong muscles flexing against your palms, your nails scratching at his wide back and shoulders.
His hands travel behind your back to unclasp your bra and you let him, letting the undergarment go loose against your breasts and Dean takes it off. He drinks the view in, staring and you start to feel self-conscious and take your hands to cover yourself up. Dean catches onto that and kisses you again, one big hand grabbing at your right breast and you whimper in his mouth.
“I always knew you were beautiful” He whispers against your lips and pulls back to look at you again “But you are the most perfect thing I’ve ever laid eyes on”
This time you turned away from him with a stupid smile on your face.
“Says you” You say and turn to him again, your hands over his shoulders and moving towards his back “Your back is a perfect place for my nails to dig in” You whisper seductively on his ear and leave a hickey on his neck. He groans and lowers his head to wrap his mouth around one of your nipples, the warm feeling against the sensitive nub making you arch your back into him and your fingers to tangle in his hair.
“Dean, fuck–” You moan as he gently bites your nipple and moves to the other breast, his eyes looking at you from below and drinking in your noises.
One of his hands sneaked up your inner thigh and teased your clit over your panties and you shivered, a smirk on his lips against your breast. He slowly took your panties off, discarding them on the ground and now you were completely bare below him, vulnerable.
His middle finger pressed over your clit and you arched again.
“Dean, please…” You beg, your best attempt at puppy dog eyes looking down at him and he adds his ring finger, starting to do slow circles over the sensitive nub as he kisses up your neck, your noises of pleasure egging him on.
He lowers his fingers to your entrance and he slips both in with no restraint given your wetness, the feeling making you let out a moan and grab onto his shoulders as he hooks his fingers inside you, touching that special spot.
He smirks smugly and continues his ministrations, your pussy clenching and tightening around his fingers making him groan.
“You’re so wet” He mumbles “I wonder how you taste like” He gives your nose a peck, your mind too drowned in pleasure to respond to his words. He kisses down your body, his fingers never leaving you, until he's facing your cunt. He places both your legs over his shoulders, your thighs resting around his cheeks, the light stubble leaving a tingly feeling behind.
He leaves a lingering kiss over your clit and you buck your hips, looking for more friction. He teases a bit more, biting and sucking at your inner thighs, everywhere but where you needed his mouth to be. You took charge and grabbed at his hair, pulling his face closer and he complied.
“Oh, fuck!” You groan.
His tongue licked at your sex and your loud moans echoed through the walls, the warm muscle doing wonders against you and the mix of his fingers bringing you closer and closer to the edge, your eyes fluttering close in bliss.
“Dean, God” You moan as he squeezes your thigh. All the ministrations send shivers down your spine, your core tightening inside you, that familiar rush of warmth spreading through you. Your thighs try to close, forgetting Dean’s in between and he hums against your cunt, the vibrations making you feel like you were in heaven. “I’m cumming”
“Cum for me princess” He mumbles and you let go with a chant of his name. The feeling washes over you, making you feel lighter for a couple seconds, Dean helping you ride out your orgasm. When the stimulation becomes too much and you whine and squirm away, he gets up from his knees, chin glistening in your juices. He took his fingers out, a grunt scaping your throat at the emptiness. It was a sinful sight.
He crawled over you again, his middle and index finger teasing at your bottom lip.
“Open up” He said, voice deep and demanding and you obeyed, opening your mouth and letting his fingers in. You lick your juices clean off his fingers, never breaking eye contact, humming and moaning against his digits as Dean bites his lips with force. Your hand travels down to unbuckle his belt and he takes his fingers away from your mouth to kiss you.
Once you got the belt open, Dean backed away, taking his shoes off and unzipping his pants. Meanwhile, you drank in his appearance. His hair was a mess, a thin sheen of sweat covering his skin, his arms flexing as he lowered his pants along with his boxers. He was divine.
When he dropped the jeans his eyes drifted back to you, catching you staring and he smirks.
“See something you like?” He asks, closing the gap between you again, smashing your lips to his in yet another breathtaking kiss.
He completely lies you down on the mattress, his elbows supporting his weight over you as his cock bumps against your sensitive sex and you gasp, hand gripping the back of his neck.
“Fuck me” You say, bluntly and whiny but he gets the hint and aligns his member to your hole.
“Yes Ma’am” He says and starts to insert himself inside you, an immediate groan coming out of both your throats, his forehead dropping to the nape of your neck as his fingers dug into your hips, holding himself back to not slam into you at full force. You felt amazing around him, the warmth of your walls made him never want to go away.
“Oh my God” You moan as he slowly goes deeper, his cock throbbing inside you. Once he bottomed out you were breathing heavier than ever, pupils blown and nails teasing at his back. “Dean” 
“I’m right here sweetheart” He reassured you and left kisses over your shoulder to distract you. You grinned at his sweetness and rolled your hips against his, a sign that he could move.
“Move, please, I want to feel you” You mumbled and he obliged, instant pleasure going through your body.
“God, Y/N” He moaned close to your ear as he went faster, your moans getting louder.
He smashed his hips against yours, eyeing the way it went in and out, being deliciously consumed by your cunt, glistening with your slick and cum. He stared at you, your fucked out state, the way you were a moaning, whimpering mess beneath him and he felt proud to be the reason you were like this.
You felt every inch ripping your insides, Dean’s hands roaming through your body as his lips left bite marks and kisses around your skin. His lips wrapped around your nipple and everything just added more to the pleasure when his tongue circled around your nipple.
“You’re so pretty” He groaned after pulling away from your breasts and felt that familiar feeling go through him as your pussy clenched tighter around his cock. He was close and he knew you were too. His hands traveled both down to your lower body, one pressed over the skin under your belly button and the other circled your clit messly.
When he pressed down over your lower belly you felt him impossibly deeper and grabbed at the sheets underneath you to ground yourself to reality.
“Jesus– Fuck Dean, please!” You moaned incoherently as that bubble inside you was about to pop “I’m gonna cum, baby, please” You moaned again and you knew he was close to, his hips stuttering and losing rhythm.
“Cum with me Y/N” He said and not even seconds later you unraveled beneath him, your high hitting you like a bus, a loud moan rippling through your throat and Dean pulled out, cumming over your stomach, his chest heaving with his breaths.
Dean forced himself to get up and get a wet towel to clean you up in the bathroom, coming back and gently wiping away the fluids. You were spent and at the same time as happy as you could ever be.
You adjusted yourself in the bed while you waited for Dean to come back from the bathroom after discarding the towel, his naked shadow visible thanks to the light inside. When he walked out he smiled at you and snuggled beside you, tucking your head under his chin and wrapping an arm around your waist.
You were both silent for a while until he spoke up. 
“I love you so much” He said “And no, this is not post sex haze, I’ve loved you for so long” He admitted quietly above you and you felt your heart beating ten times faster at his words. You looked up at him and placed a gentle hand over his cheek to make him look down at you.
“I love you too, dumbass” You say with a chuckle and kiss him deeply again, pouring all the love you knew you felt towards him into the kiss.
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A/N: Notes and reblogs encourage me to keep writing, feedback makes those writings better. Thank you for reading, Xoxo.
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mickyschumacher · 11 months
Text
𝐇𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐒 𝐓𝐎 𝐌𝐘𝐒𝐄𝐋𝐅 .ೃ࿐
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𝐒𝐔𝐌𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐘: charles leclerc, at the end of the day, is a simple man. so of course, when you show up to the annual f1 dinner dressed like a goddess, it becomes impossibly hard for charles to keep his hands to himself.
𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒: 18+ (minors DNI), established bf/gf relation, reader has a vagina, semi-public fingering, breeding kink (?), cum fetish, creampie, p in v, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it, folks!), edging, orgasm denial
𝐏𝐀𝐈𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆: charles leclerc x gf!fem!reader
𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐃 𝐂𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐓: 2k+
𝐀/𝐍: first post ahhhh... this was proof read but i wouldn't put it past me to have a few errors. hope you like it! ♡︎
𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓
⋆  •°.  。  .°•  ⋆
"Merde (shit)," Charles swore under his breath as he caught you finishing up.
You raised a brow at him through the mirror of your bedroom. Putting on your earrings, you asked, "What's wrong, Charles?"
You watched through the mirror as Charles walked up behind you. He gave a small smile to you, resting his shin on your bare shoulder and wrapping his arms around your waist. You returned a warm smile, leaning into him and resting your hands over his.
He pinched the silk fabric in his hands. "Can I convince you to change dresses?"
A small frown made its way onto your face while you mended your brows together. "Why? You don't like it?" You queried while eyeing yourself in the mirror. You thought you looked quite good.
It was a silk dress in pure white. It had its spaghetti straps that connected to the bunch of white silk hanging around your chest as the rest of the silk clung to you body, fitting each on of your curves snuggly. On the right side of your body, the dress had a slit for your leg to peak through. On the back, the spaghetti straps cross over each other as the fabric hung loose around your lower back.
You had paired it with a necklace Charles had got you for your anniversary: a thin gold chain with a small gold plated heart-shaped ruby. Your hair was also down and styled with a few soft curls that complimented your face.
Altogether, it was simple yet beautiful.
Your eyes snapped to your boyfriend who released a soft chuckle. Charles' eyes twinkled in the light. "Quite the opposite. I love it too much," he whispered into your ear as he rubbed the side of the your hip.
Your felt your breath slow incredibly fast, feeling his lips trail up your neck with small kisses. "Charles," you softly warned. You weren't necessarily complaining. You and Charles often had your hands on each other to the point where one might even say it was sickening. You didn't even have a bra on under the dress. But you both had somewhere to be.
Charles let out a small hum, meeting your eyes in the mirror. He bought his hand out, tracing your lips with his thumb. "Yes, mon amour (my love)?" He asked with feigned innocence.
Your eyes narrowed. "You can't start now. We're going to be late if you keep this up."
Charles pursed his lips, pouting as he turned you around to face him. He pushed your hair behind your ears. "Who cares? We can have dinner here. Just you and me. Doesn't that sound nice, amour (love)? I even know what I want for dessert."
You felt him pull you closer into him, his lips hovering over yours as his hand trailed up and down your leg.
You felt a grin play onto your face. You leaned closer, feeling impossibly close to him. "Oh Charles," You trailed you finger over his lip, in which he clearly invited the gesture as he bought your finger into his mouth. "In your dreams," you deadpanned, abruptly taking your finger out of his mouth and placing a kiss on his cheek.
You let out a sigh, pushing aside your own arousal. "Now come on. We need to leave."
━━━━━━━━━━━
Charles was not a happy man, to say the least. You had practically blueballed him and despite being thirty minutes into dinner, plus the twenty minute drive to the restaurant, all he could think of is you.
You were sat next to him, conversing with Lily, Alex's girlfriend, about her job as a professional golfer. A job that required a lot more training and thought than you had previously thought. Honestly, you were having a such great time that you hadn't realised you were even neglecting your on-the-edge boyfriend until you felt a hand on your right leg.
"Charles, you good?" You asked.
Charles wanted to laugh because you had asked in so much earnest. Like you had genuinely forgot. Of course, he wasn't one to let you forget.
You felt him tug your chair both closer to the table, so the laced table drapes covered you, and to him. His hand moved from your leg to receive the the warmth of your inner upper thigh.
You looked at him almost dumbfounded. "Charles, amour, no," you said through gritted teeth as you gave him a fake smile. It's not that you didn't want to, but how were you supposed to act normal for the whole dinner? Especially when you and Charles both knew what his fingers did to you.
Charles only sported a grin on his face. His fingers continued to creep up your thigh, nearing your white laced underwear, which you had worn for the sole purpose of matching your dress, of course.
Your breathed hitched as you felt his fingers skim over your underwear. Your skin, he could tell, was beginning to burn with heat as it glistened with small traces of sweat. Whether it was out of embarrassment or arousal, hell, or both, Charles didn't care. Whatever was going on, he enjoyed it.
His fingers slid under your panties and found themselves in the heats of your soft lips of your pussy. His teeth sunk into his bottom lip. You were soaked down there. His two fingers already felt drenched. Charles knew that this hadn't just appeared out of nowhere. "Ma belle (my beautiful), be honest with me. You've been wet since you teased me in your bedroom, right? All of this... for me..."
If the slight quiver of your walls near his fingers didn't give you the answer, you sure did with a curt nod. How were you supposed to feel nothing for this blue-eyed, dimpled man who looked good in everything, but especially a suit?
Charles smiled. "That's what I thought. Thank you for being so honest, ma belle. I think that deserves an award," he whispered.
You felt yourself still at his voice as his fingers trailed over your clit a few times before he pushed them into your pussy. You pressed your lips together, suppressing the moan that so desperately wanted to escape your throat.
Charles couldn't help but grin further, darting his eyes from the conversation he was partially in with Carlos and Lando and to the glorious sight underneath the table. He couldn't entirely see your pussy but god could he imagine. You enveloping his fingers entirely as he thrusted back and forth. The trickles of your body running down his fingers.
He cleared his throat, taking a sip of his champagne as he adjusted himself. He was growing hard as every second passed. As much as he loved teasing you and fingering you... he wanted to fuck you. He wanted to watch as his cock entered you... the ring of white you made around him... your hips bucking for more... fuck.
You clenched around his fingers, feeling a pit at your stomach grow. You let out the shakiest and quietest sigh known to Earth. There was no way Charles was about to let cum with some of your closest friends around you... surely...
The answer to that qualm was a 'no' as Charles' fingers started to speed up. Jesus.
You must've been flushed to the max as you had to awkwardly laugh off Pierre's comment to "lay off the champagne". Honestly, that was your limit.
Before you could get any closer to your climax and risk losing it in front of everybody, you placed a hand on Charles' crotch, making him still his fingers and flicker his eyes to you.
His eyes hardened as you slowly rubbed him through his pants. "Charles, if you continue any further, I swear to god, I will blueball you till the end of the week. Let's be patient, okay, sweetie?" The sickly sweet smile on your face was in a hard contrast compared to the harsh whispers falling from your lips.
Charles' tongue darted out his lips and fell to the side. He rested his hand on yours and patted it gently. Although, to anyone, such a promise sounded empty. He was sure you would do it. It happened all the time even unintentionally. He placed a small kiss to your cheek. With a calm composure and through gritted teeth, he murmured, "Okay, mon amour."
━━━━━━━━━━━
The ride back home was impossibly and scarily quiet. There was a lot of tension in the car. The both of you were still hooked on the adrenaline of risking yourselves in public and still horny as ever. Evident as Charles had applied more pressure to the accelerator and the cars nearby went from blurs to dashing streaks.
You were opening the door to your house as you felt Charles’ arms wrap around you. "Faster, mon amour, I can't keep my hands to myself," he whispered, starting kiss your neck.
You felt your heart pick up its pace when you heard the door click closed. Soon enough, both of your shoes were off, Charles' lips were crashing into yours, and your hands were in his hair. The fire between you two had reached a new height as Charles relished the moan that had fallen from your mouth. God, he had been waiting to hear that the entire dinner.
Bringing you back into your bedroom, Charles left kisses everywhere he could as he peeled back the straps of your dress, and gently removed the attired off your body, leaving you only clothed in your soaked panties and his necklace.
"Fuck," he groaned, hovering over you to hold the necklace between his fingers. "You look so good, mon amour."
The smile on your lips made his heart race once again. He smiled, planting a firm kiss on your lips before his hands started to trail down to your chest. Your breasts were what he considered a global treasure in his world, you. He loved everything about them; their softness, their plumpness... but especially, their sensitivity.
Charles latched his mouth around one nipple, leaving his hand to the other. His tongue swirled around the pebbled mound as his fingers circled the other.
You let out a sigh of pleasure, arching your back and raising your hand to feel his hair to push more of yourself into him. The obscene slurps of your breasts went straight to your core as Charles released your nipple with a slick pop.
"Ma belle," Charles breathed out, his fingers reaching your soaked panties. He pulled the drenched material away from your heated pussy. "I need to taste you," he spoke, himself drenched in desperation.
He pulled down the panties, revealing in all its glory, the pussy he had been thirsting over at dinner. He let out a moan as he prodded at your engorged lips.
You feel a shiver come over your body when his breath hit your pussy. His tongue took one long strip at your folds. His blues eyes averted back to yours, holding your gaze and blossoming an indescribable feeling within the both of you. "Look at me, love, while I devour you."
You managed to give a small nod as he returned his attention to your folds, all while maintaining eye contact. "Fuck," you moaned out, trying hard to not throw your head back as he dipped his mouth into you. It seemed that was still hungry from the dinner as he was true to his promise.
Charles was devouring you almost as if he were some sort of animal. He groaned in pleasure, sending a sort of vibrations through your core. He continuously lapped at your folds, drunk on the taste of you. "You taste so good," he grunted, bringing his lips around your clit.
You arched your back into the bed, toes curling at the sheets beneath you. "Fuck, Charles!" You bucked your hips into his mouth, giving into the need to roll your head back. When you looked back up, Charles was a sight to behold. His tongue traveled in circles around your sensitive nub. His stubble was soaked in your juices. He somehow even managed a smirk while eating you out.
"Charles... I'm gonna-" you began before cutting out as his tongue darted further into your folds. "God," you moaned out, your grip on his hair tightening.
"Don't say my name in vain, mon amour," Charles quipped, feeling a slight convulsion of your body as he thumbed your clit.
If Charles wasn't about to make you cum, you would've smacked that grin right off his face. But you were so close...
Charles placed a light kiss to your clit, removing his face from your pussy. He felt a sense of enjoyment follow him as a familiar terror spread over your face.
"No. Charles. Please. God, I want to cum," You whined out.
Charles looked at your flushed face, pushing your hair behind your ears like he did earlier this evening. Somehow, you had become even more beautiful. On the verge of a climax, fucked out, skin flushed and doused in arousal and sweat.
"I need to be in you... fuck, to fill you up, Y/N," Charles hissed in pleasure as he thought about his cum oozing from your hole.
"Hurry, Charles. I need you."
That was all you had to said as Charles rushed to finally take off his clothes.
You watched his thick cock hit his toned stomach and let out a small moan. Charles hovered over you, bringing you into a deep kiss. You could feel his cock nudge the sides of the pussy. Purposely, he dragged himself up and down your folds, intoxicated off the edging feeling.
"Fuck, Charles."
God, he loved the way you moaned his name. It was one of those other things that sent him overboard. Knowing that he was making you feel like that. That it was his cock teasing you. His fingers you clenched around. His voice that made you wet.
Charles looked down to your pussy, aligning his cock. He let out a ridiculously low grunt as he watched your folds cover his cock. You fit him so perfectly, it drove him crazy. His cock was snug and tight in you. It felt like one move in you would send him off.
You let out another moan, feeling his thick cock fill you up. His hands gripped your hips, turning you around so you sat on him. "Ride me, love."
There was nothing Charles wanted more than to see you ride his cock, tits bouncing up and down in sync with his your necklace. And you were happy to comply.
You began to move your hips, hearing the room begin to fill with groans.
"Y/N," Charles moaned, hips bucking to dive deeper into you.
You continued to ride at a semi-fast pace. Lewd sounds of your skin slapping and sticking against one another filled the air. You could feel his cock reach into the deepest parts of you.
Charles sunk his teeth into his lips, watching a white ring form around his cock. The twinkle of your necklace shone in his eyes, occasionally hitting your nipples as it swung around. It was all so much.
You could feel Charles' cock twitch in you, telling you he was close. You grabbed his hands and placed on them on your hips. Your own hands latched onto your breast and the other to your clit.
Charles tightened his grip on your hips before starting to thrust at an immense speed. "Merde," he swore, feeling you clench and take even more of him in you. He could catch the slight shake of your hands as you also neared your climax.
"Come with me, amour. Let me fill you with my cum," he groaned.
That dirty mouth of his and his rousing cock... it was enough to send you over the edge. You let out a high-pitched moan, the end almost silent as your orgasm hit you in hard waves. "Fuck, Charles!"
Charles followed you soon. He moaned, bring you down and holding you tightly. This new angle sent you both into a new spiral. His hips stuttered at an abnormal pace, feeling his cum paint your walls. He let out a string of colourful words, letting his orgasm take any extra drops of his cum into you.
Charles smiled, kissing the side of your forehead. "You did well, mon armour."
You gave him a tired smile. "You too, my love," you murmured before bringing him into a soft and lazy kiss.
Charles watched as you removed yourself from his cock. Only resulting him in a moan from the both of you as his cum trailed out of you.
"God," Charles gulped, feeling his cock harden once again.
You smirked. "I thought you were God, Charles," you teased.
Charles narrowed his eyes at you. "I guess I'm going to have to show you again, ma belle."
© 𝐌𝐈𝐂𝐊𝐘𝐒𝐂𝐇𝐔𝐌𝐀𝐂𝐇𝐄𝐑
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rthko · 8 months
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I used to get insecure when reading radical critiques of "born this way" narratives, but I understand it differently now. I'm reading early defenses of homosexuals that concede that their "invert" pathology is worthy of sympathy, and that straight society ought to allow them to have sex (in the right circumstances) so they don't have to be miserable. They go on to claim that while some people who commit homosexual acts are victims of their circumstances, the real perverts are ontologically straight men who commit them by choice.
If I asked every LGBT person I know, "did you choose to be queer," virtually everyone would say no. I have never, to my knowledge, met anyone who would say yes. But if I asked them if they would turn straight/cis if they could, I believe that most, including people who have gone through great hardships on account of their identities, would still say no. The phrase "gay lifestyle" is considered politically incorrect, and indeed there is no one gay lifestyle. But we have also developed culturally distinct circles associated with pleasure as a virtue, creativity, individual dignity and collective care. Many of us learned to look at the straight world not with envy but with relief that we're not part of it.
There are characteristics of our queer identities or behaviors that are a choice. I did not choose to be attracted to men, but I did choose to be promiscuous. I did not choose to be uncomfortable with "male" gender roles, but I did choose to challenge them through gender expression. An emphasis on innateness would imply that the only characteristics of my identity and behavior worth defending are those that are inevitable. It would ask why I still insist on living the way I do when my sexual desires can now just as well be satiated in a legally recognized monogamous marriage.
The subtext of this question, a choice or not a choice, is whether a person is worthy of support. Much like the elusive "gay gene," some trans advocates are searching for the definitive proof of "male brains" and "female brains" that will validate the existence of trans people once and for all. If gender becomes medically or scientifically "provable," perhaps science would then validate trans people. Or, perhaps a brain scan would determine who should or should not consider themselves trans, and create new rationalizations to misgender on "scientific" terms. We need only look back to the sexologists of the late 19th and early 20th century, often gay themselves, who developed scientific rationalizations for queer behavior in good faith only to have them reapplied to nefarious ends.
Many will insist they support LGBT people in the abstract but not the specifics of queer culture. These are the tendencies that don't have a scientific or metaphysical explanation. It is less often we hear claims that one is born to be flamboyant, promiscuous, left wing, kinky or polyamorous, so these tendencies are superfluous. There is a platonic ideal of a lesbian, a gay man, a bisexual or a trans person who follows their natural proclivities and not a step further, and you're not it. So arguments against born this way narratives are not just in defense of those who see themselves as having chosen their gender or sexuality--for what it's worth, I have not knowingly met any. It's that this is a flimsy claim to legitimacy, one that has been used against us, and one that can only be taken so far. I'm not interested in determining who is "faking it." I understand more and more that everyone's body belongs to them, and the steps they take to experience joy and mutual pleasure need no explanation.
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obae-me · 1 year
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Human Things that Confuse the Non-Humans
I've seen a lot of headcanons on my feed recently that are all about demonic traits and things that seem to scare or facinate MC, but what about the opposite? So I was wondering what sort of typical human things might either unsettle the non-humans, confuse them, or enchant them in some way.
Most of these are based off of personal heasdcanons I already have, so it's very self indulgent.
If ya'll have any other ideas, feel free to share, I'd love to hear them.
Also not proof read cuz I'm writing this at like 5 am due to sleep issues.
------
Circadian Rythem. I've always wanted to bring up how I headcanon that the Devildom doesn't even follow a 24 hour schedule, since the 24 hour thing is entirely based around the sun, and since they don't have a sun, it makes sense that days would follow some other set rule (I always think that Devildom days are much much longer, hence why MC is caught so many times in canon just taking naps wherever even when Belphie is not around), but that's a headcanon for another time. Anyways, I think the fact that Humans almost need to follow a certain sleeping schedule would totally confuse the demons. Demons only really sleep to stay at their strongest, it's not as vital to them. And the fact that humans can die if they don't get the proper sleep? Totally freaks them out. If MC ever pulls an all-nighter, they all think they're one foot in the grave. Having Solomon and MC getting naturally sleepy more often than the non-humans do might seem pretty adorable at times though.
The fact that human hair does indeed shed. I don't personally think demon or angelic hair would, I feel like hair is something they can change at will within reason (There is a chat with Mammon about him getting his haircut, but he said he was going to change it, so I like to think he made it grow back instantly and cut it like normal again). So I like to think that MC or Solomon leaving strands of hair behind is shocking, because the non-humans only ever associated that trait with animals, but they also find it weirdly cute in a way. The demons and angels do try to ask to comb or brush Solomon's and/or MC's hair from time to time. They feel like they're helping.
Being able to roll (curl? Fold?) your tongue. I think it would be hilarious if despite the millions of other things demons and angels can do, none of them can roll their tongues. And then they get confused too when they discover that not every human can do it either, just certain ones. Solomon can do it and treats it like a party trick.
Allergies. I don't know if it's said in Canon anywhere that demons and angels can have allergies...I hope not because (as much as it sucks) it would make sense for it to just be a human thing. Just the concept entirely would have the non-human's heads spin. What do you mean certain things can just have your body essentially attack itself? And it's different for every human? It can be quite literally anything? (The non-humans would absolutely have a heart attack if they knew about mine)
Human mimicry. I think we as humans just have a natural instinct to mimic or repeat certain things. It's a lot more noticeable with internet culture and memes and references and things, but I think a very human thing to do is repeat or mock things we come into contact with. For example, if we hear an animal noise, we try to repeat it like we're talking to it. If we see something in a weird position, we might try to pose like it, etc. We try to relate to things, which is why personification is so prominent in everything we do. (Like how some of us tell wobbily objects to stay or loud machines to shut up) The non-humans think this is very cute. They don't really do that. The closest thing they might relate to is a current trend, but those pass by rather quickly. Mammon probably thinks we're almost like a bunch of crows.
Emotional control/suppression. Hear me out. It's well known in canon that the brothers blow up easily. They'll fight someone over miniscule things. Even Lucifer, who says he prides himself on his control, loses his temper quite often. And Mammon, while seemingly the best at controlling anger, is very open about all his other emotions. The only two demons that clearly have the best control overall are Barbatos and Diavolo who are the two most powerful demons in the Devildom. It probably takes so much energy and power to keep themselves in check. We hardly ever see that dark aura around them if at all in the game, which seems to give the two this unspoken common respect. As for angels, it was already mentioned once that the angels do have magical methods forcibly controlling emotions, and despite that, I'm sure it takes ages of training and practice to get to the level of "patient perfection" they're supposed to exhibit. Now, humans aren't perfect, and of course, there's a lot of nuance to this like mental illness I won't get into, but generally speaking, we quickly learn how to regulate our emotions or how to supress them for society's sake. At the very least, when we get angry we dont suddenly get surrounded by a dark shadow or shift into a different form. And I like to think this terrifies the non-humans to a degree. They don't know when humans are angry or upset until it's blatantly obvious. They already are off-put by Solomon because they never really know what he's up to. And what if it's not even because he's doing "weird" things, what if it's just because he seems to be so calm all the time and no one knows how to read him? None of them know how to read human body language. There's no aura to see, no puffed up wings, no glowing eyes, no whipping tails. Humans can just...stand there, sometimes with a blank expression, sometimes just staring. It can give even the stronger willed beings the creeps. Bonus points if MC is great at masking too. You mean humans can just...take extreme emotions and tuck them away for later? I'm sure that's an absolutely wild concept. Most of the non-humans are just not capable of that kind of control. Albeit its not always the healthiest option, but just the fact that humans have the willpower to just sometimes choose or force themselves not to feel at all is Barbatos level intimidating.
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caxde · 4 months
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drunken confession | steve harrington x reader
summary you're Dustin's older sister, a night out with you're friends makes you see that here might be more between you and Steve (7.5k)
warnings fem!reader, fluff (a lot), mutual pining, yearning etc, slowburn friends to lovers, idiots in love!!!, mentions of alcohol use, tabacco and anxiety (briefly). and eventual smut (p in v, hj unproteccted) english is not my first language so I apologise if there’s some mistakes, not proof read! 
“So, are you going out tonight?” Dustin asked once again, making you center your attention on him, you stop daydreaming. 
“Um, I dunno. We’ll get some drinks, better if you don't wait up I think.” You answered, looking at him. Your brother always seemed like he had more to say, like there was always a puzzle, or an equation that he had to solve in the back of his mind. 
“You’re gonna have to talk to mom.” He scuffed, almost like a laugh. 
“What? Why?” Your eyebrows scratched as you asked, your shoulders got high, and so did your voice. 
“She’s not letting you the car again if you’re out drinking.” 
“Well, I’m not driving so…” You finished, letting the fork in your plate, the clinking of it ending the conversation briefly. 
It seemed like it was going to be a quiet night anyway. Just you, and your friends, nothing unusual. Though you still didn’t know if you’d be drinking in someone’s house or out out. 
Because those are two very different things. 
If you were in someone’s house, you’d be calm, the lights won’t annoy you, the music won’t be too loud, and there won’t be too many people. 
And you’d promised yourself that even if that happened, you weren’t going to overreact, because these things are normal, and it is okay. You're safe, in someone's house, and out in a club or bar. 
Thankfully the bar was still empty when you arrived. 
And the first round of beers went down pretty quickly. 
So did the second one. 
Nancy was excited. You could tell she was really happy, finally having received her acceptance letter to the college of her dreams. She couldn’t stop blushing every time somebody new walked into the bar and said congratulations. 
Robin was as chatty as ever, as she normally was to be honest. You’d found out that Robin gets excited over other peoples’ excitement, and you often thought to yourself what a good cheerleader she would make if she wasn’t as clumsy as she is. 
Eddie was quiet. It wasn’t unusual, not this early in the evening. He always gets more comfortable once he gets used to the people that are wherever you guys end up, and once he realises that nobody looks at him like he’s a freak anymore, in fact, since Corroded Coffin was gaining a bit of a reputation people tried to get close to him, talk to him. He’d never say it, but he loved it. 
And, Steve. 
Well, he was just electric. Something happened whenever you two were in the same place. He’ll participate in whatever conversation is going on at the table, but for a moment, however brief, he’d look at you, and you swear time would stop. 
You didn’t know why that happened, you just enjoyed it. 
And it was happening right now, as you were finishing your second beer, and he was already asking for the third round, his hand up with the empty bottle, once the barman saw Steve, he putted five fingers up, Steve nodded. 
And as it always happened after two beers, you needed to go out, get some air and smoke. And as always, Eddie walked out with you. 
“You doing okay Henderson?” Eddie muttered as he offered you his lighter, smoke already escaping his lips as he talked. 
“Yeah, just thinking.” You answered quickly, just before lighting the camel you had in your pocket. 
“You need to stop doing all that thinking.” He laughed, trying -with no success- to make you at least chuckle. “You wanna talk about it?” 
“I think you already know if I’m being honest.” Your voice was barely above a whisper, pleading that he won’t make you actually say it. 
“For what it’s worth, I think he’s just as much in his head as you are.” He admitted, as he took one long drag of his cigarette, almost gone now. 
“You’re only saying that because you’re my friend.” You brush it off, not really ready to believe that he might be right, not wanting to believe him, in case he was actually right. 
“And I’m also his friend.” He added, looking into your eyes, a soft smile in his face, and something else that you can’t recognise now. “And honestly, you two… something’s going on, it’s not hard to see it.” 
“Nothing has happened. Nothing can anyway.” You add, as you throw your cigarette to the floor, stomping on it so it’s definitely put out. 
“Why would you say that?” Eddie asks, his eyebrows raised, curiosity filling his voice. 
“Because he still likes Nancy.” 
-
Everyone had paid for one round. And you were now debating if you should go home or stay for a little longer. 
Nancy wanted to leave, and so did Robin. 
Eddie didn’t mind.
Steve wanted to stay. 
And you weren’t sure why but so did you. 
So, the table only had three new beers now, and a louder conversation. 
The bar had filled up, and the music was louder now. So of course you needed to scream a bit to hear each other. Again you weren’t really talking about anything important, just enjoying the company they provided, and the warmth that you felt being in a space with your favourite people. 
“Edds, I’m going out for a smoke break, wanna come?” You asked softly, the yellow packet already on your hand, trying not to feel nervous as you feel Steve looking deep into your eyes. 
“Um, not really… I really need to take a piss.” He laughs a bit more than necessary, the alcohol finally taking him over. 
“I’ll come.” Steve's voice finally could be heard. That stupid smile in his lips anytime he gets to spend quiet time with you. 
“Come on.” You smiled shyly as you stood up, a bit too fast, feeling the alcohol all at once once you finally were out of your chair. 
The cold air was the first thing that you felt, hitting you right in the middle of your chest, though you did not feel its coldness, at least not now. Not when he was right there beside you.
You’ll deny it every time somebody asks, but the way he lights the cigarette was hypnotizing. 
His long fingers curving to stop the wind from blowing away the flame, his lips holding it tightly, his eyes looking down carefully so that he does not burn himself. And just the way his nose and parted lips would shine in a soft orange light once the flame was ignited, it made him look both peaceful and angelic. But honestly, that wasn’t the best part. 
The best part of his little ritual came when he’d scooch over you, his face still -even if it was soft enough that he wouldn't notice- scrunched up, concentrating so that the flame wouldn’t disappear. His hands covering the end of your cigarette now, and he would look at you attentively, holding the lighter until smoke came out of your lips. 
You didn’t pay attention to him in that moment -you never could if you didn’t wanna burn yourself- but if you did you’d see the way his eyes couldn’t stay away from the way your lips look. 
And then, he’d always say and do the same thing. 
First, he takes a step back, so he’s not actually so close to you in case it would annoy you, but his feet would stay pointed at you, just like his attention was fully with you, and the way you look up at him. her and her dove eyes. He thinks he could see them even if he closes his eyes. 
Then his free hand would travel to the top of his head, retouching his hair once again, he does that right before he tilted his head to the left.
Then he always asks the same thing. 
“So, how are you doing?” 
And you’d always say the same thing. 
“Good, I’m doing good.” 
But really, you wanted to say. 
“I’m always good when I’m with you.” 
But it didn’t matter how much you'd drink, you never find the courage. 
But for some reason, today, after he asked you how you were doing he kept talking. 
“I’m not gonna lie to you Henderson, I’m getting pretty drunk today.” And he laughed. I could listen that laugh forever, you kept thinking. Though you didn’t need to say it, he knew it as soon as you smiled up at him and bite your lower lips as you looked at him. 
It drove him mad. 
“Honestly?” You asked as he kept laughing. He nodded and scratched the bridge of his nose with his thumb, cigarette still in his hand. “I’m getting drunk too.”
“Can I tell you something else?” He demanded, his eyebrows raising for just a second, your cheeks starting to hurt from just how much you were smiling. As soon as you nodded he lowered his head, and his voice. “It’s a really stupid thing.” He added, his words slurring a bit. 
“It’s never stupid if you say it.” You say back. It always happened, when you were drunk you could not lie, and with that, you’d say things more sincerely, calmer and softer. Even more when Steve was the one listening to them. 
“You look really pretty today.” 
You were expecting everything but that. Your face lighted up, your eyes shined brighter and you didn’t even know your smile could grow wider. You shook your head and scoffed. A friendly and shocked reaction over such sincerity. 
“You’re an idiot.” It’s the only thing you managed to say back. 
But he knew you were happy. Just as much as he knew his heart had skipped a beat as soon as he saw your eyes squint for a second. It was becoming impossible to act normal around you, he realised. 
You stayed there, under the cold starry sky, not saying anything, and it didn’t matter. You didn’t need to. 
Once you finished smoking in such a comfortable silence it was hard to go back inside, but even if you wanted to stay in that quiet moment, you headed back, only to find Eddie deep in a conversation with a girl you didn’t know. 
Well, it wasn’t really a conversation, more so he had his arm around her waist and was following her out. 
Steve laughed in shock first, after looking at you. 
“Guess that means we’ll have to drink his beer.” You add in a chuckle. 
Your body was all warm and fuzzy. You weren’t going to drink anymore. 
But Steve seemed to keep going, you weren’t sure why, probably just the habit, oblivious to you, it was to calm his nervous thoughts. 
The bar was about to close, and that meant that it was getting quiet again, no need to scream anymore. 
“Your ears get red when you’ve had enough to drink.” You point out touching the tips of Steve’s ears, brushing his hair behind them. You were giggly and touchy, even more so now that no rational thought was in your brain. 
“Well… so does your nose.” He replays back, his eyes softer, as he lets his index finger touch the tip of your nose. “bub.” He adds. You’re not sure if he says it as a reaction to touching it or as a pet name, but you don’t care either way. 
“You’re wasted Harrington.” You giggle as you say his last name, your hands travelling down his neck, into his chest, falling clumsy -but softly- into his lap. He loses his breath for a second as he lets himself enjoy the way your skin feels against his. 
“Like father, like son, right?” He half jokes as he raises the beer he still is working on finishing. 
“What?” You shake your head at him. “No, no way. You look just like your mom.” You add. Your voice feels like a soft song to him at that moment. People never tell him that he looks like his mom, even if he always wanted that. 
“You’re the first person to say that, y’know” He confesses, his hand now resting on his hand, his eyes looking deep into yours. 
“Well… It’s true. Your mom’s beautiful, and so are you.” Your cheeks go red as soon as you realize what you just said. Though you mean every word of it. 
“You think I’m beautiful?” He asks, for a second it seems like he’s mocking you, but you know him well enough to know that he’s just shocked at the way you say things, so truthfully, so honestly. You always have the ability to leave him speechless. 
“Yeah, that’s what I said.” You sound more sure of yourself now, as you snatch a little beer from his bottle, he looks at you with his eyebrows raised, surprised and in absolute awe of you. 
“Not handsome?” You shake your head no as you giggle a bit at him, “Beautifull” He elongates the last L, a grin appearing on his lips. 
That stupid Steve grin. 
“Beautiful people are soft and kind. Not just on the outside, but all of them. That’s you.” His whole expression softened, even more if it was possible. His eyes were a pool of honey and coffee, and they could not stop looking at you, with pure adoration. 
“You’re the one being an idiot now.” 
You giggled as you felt the last sip travel down your throat, you nodded before looking back at him. 
“They’re closing, we should go.” You point out once you see the lights of the bar light up. The universal sign that the night had come to an end. 
-
The ride home was always fun, and worth remembering, every single one. 
This one however, was special. 
Your hand rested on the back of his head, playing with his hair lazily, not really thinking about it. It felt nice, and it was the closest you could be to him. 
That’s what you thought anyway.
What you didn’t expect was Steve deciding to let his hand rest on top of your thigh, not striking it, not squeezing it, it just rested there. His thumb drew a repetitive pattern, a kind of gesture that to you meant I’m here, but to him it screamed I don’t wanna leave.
Once he stopped the car in front of your house, he whipped around to look at you. Once again, he said nothing. He just looked at you. You knew what Robin would say if he saw that, probably something like stop admiring at each other and go to bed, please?. Eddie would probably just laugh and give you a little shove. But right now, the only thing that escaped your lips (that might be trembling because of your nervous heart, or maybe it was because his hand was still in your thigh, and yours was still on the back of his neck) was a soft “Thank you” And he just shook his head, a its nothing gesture. 
Though you weren’t ready for him to get out of his car once you were already on the steps of your house. 
“You okay Steve?” You asked as you saw him approaching. 
He didn’t say anything. 
He just hugged you. 
It had never felt like this. His hands holding you closer than ever, his head resting on the nape of your neck. Of course you returned the feeling, holding him thigh, not wanting to let go. Your head rested on his chest, and you could smell every inch of him. Aftershave, a deep cologne, the beer that you had drank and cigarette smoke. You closed your eyes for a second, trying to memorise how it all felt, how his respiration slowed for that moment, how he took a deep breath before letting you go and how he looked down at you, his honey eyes shining. His cheeks a bit flustered, and you're guessing that yours are too. 
“Yeah. Good night honey.” 
honeyhoneyhoney. 
-
“It would just be a quick drop, you wouldn’t even be five minutes late I swear!” Dustin whined again. He knew he was getting you annoyed, and frustrated, he could tell by the way your eyebrows were scrunched up and your nails were getting buried into your waist, holding tight onto something so you wouldn’t snap at him. 
“It’s not about dropping you off, it’s just…” You always had trouble communicating when you were like this, when your thoughts were going faster than your actions, when you got overwhelmed by things that nobody seemed to get overwhelmed by. “I’m supposed to go to Edds show, and I really don’t want to be late, because if I am, I might not find them and then that would mean I-”
“They’ll wait for you.” He looked down at the floor, his hands had his fingers intertwined, the same anxious tick you had, it looks like he inherited that too. “Please? Will goes back to California in a couple days and we really want to finish his campaign.”
You nodded, you understood the need to see someone, a friend. You know how much Dustin misses Will when he’s not around. He nodded back, and he sat on top of your bed. Happy. Calm, not pushing your buttons anymore. 
“So… Who’s going?” 
“Where?”
“To Eddie’s show.” He gestured with his hands, a weird look in his face that you had no time to get into. 
“Um, Robin and Steve.” You add back, your voice a bit higher in pitch, turning your back so you can look into your closet, hoping to find something that might work. Your indecision -you often think- is the worst thing that happens to you. “Nancy was supposed to come but she said something came up, so…”
“She didn’t tell you?” The tone of his voice made you turn fast to him, a shocked honesty that makes you wonder. 
“Tell me what?”
“Her and Jonathan got back together.” 
“Oh.” oh. “How do you know?” Your ears were ringing, poor Steve you thought. Poor heart-broken Steve, the only thing you ever wanted for him was for him to be happy, it didn’t matter with who, as long as he actually loved the person and was loved in return. 
“Steve told me.” Even if your little brother’s voice was calm, he was still looking at you with that same look. The one he uses when he’s trying to gather information, seeking a reaction, and if you were being honest, he was getting one. 
“Is Steve okay?” You needed to know, because right now it was all you could think about, about the kind boy that deserves to be loved, even if it can’t be by you. 
“You’re kidding? He helped Jonathan get her back!” That confused you even further, why would Steve help him get the girl he’s in love, get together with someone else. You turned back and started grabbing different tops and shirts and laying them above the bed. 
“Why would he do that? Isn’t he like, in love with Nance?” The way he started laughing made your shoulders tense for a second, jumping at such a reaction. “What are you laughing for?”
“He’s not in love with her! Jesus, you can be blind sometimes…” The palm of his face brushes his face as he looks at you, a puzzled look still on yours. 
“I don’t know what you’re on kid, but I need to get ready and have no clue what to actually wear so…” He picked up the white tank top and threw it to you. 
“You’re an idiot sometimes, you know that?” Dustins i’m much clever than you tone came back as he stood up. You rolled your eyes at him and gave him a petty smile. 
“Yeah, I’ve been told.” 
-
As you parked outside where Eddie was playing, a few minutes late, you grew nervous. The parking lot was full of cars, and finding a spot took longer than you anticipated, so by the time you found a spot and got to the entrance, the queue only seemed longer and longer. People standing in a not-so-neat line, chatting amongst themselves, shivering away the coldness of the night. Cigarette smoke and off-key lyrics filled the ambient of the people pulled away. 
You realise at that moment, you didn’t have a ticket. 
Steve and Robin had gotten in with Eddie. 
And you had no idea how to get in, so you took a quick lap to see if you found someone, anyone. 
Thankfully for you, Steve was by the entrance door, chatting away with one of the security guys. Even if Steve was tall, and had a wide back, the man talking to him toward over him, it almost made you giggle, seeing him as someone smaller, when he usually was the one that filled the room, even with just his presence. 
As you walked to him, smoke escaping your lips and a scent of burnt smoke following you, you remembered the conversation you had with Dustin. And still, you didn’t believe him, at least not until you saw the way his demeanor changed when you approached him, and a relieved “Steve” came out of you. 
Steve lost his breath for a moment. 
You looked truly angelic, and you didn’t even need to try. You in that white tank top that made your breasts appear larger, more exposed than they’re usually are, your hair down, letting the left side of your neck free, as the wind blew, and your jeans hugging every curve of your body. It drove him mad. Even worse, he always loved when you wore red lipstick, like tonight. 
Of course he wasn’t in love with anyone but you. 
But you didn’t know. 
The same way he didn’t know just how much it drove you crazy when his shirts hugged his arms like that, his veins more prominent when his arms were crossed on his chest. His hair always seemed to float, like it had a gravity of his own, but that single strand of hair that felt in between his eyes made you focus on him more. His soft honey dark eyes that were only looking at you, half lidded and full of adoration. It drove you crazy.
Of course you weren’t in love with anyone but him. 
But he didn’t know. 
Just like you had thought until a few hours ago that he still loved, or liked Nancy, it wasn’t until he had picked up Robin a few minutes ago that he didn’t find out that what you had with Eddie was purely platonic. Robin had laughed just as much as Dustin did, and called him an idiot all the same. But still, you both thought that your feelings weren’t returned, because that would be too perfect to be real. Impossible, just a dream. 
However, the way your name sounded when Steve said it made you forget about everything else, and just focus on him. 
A quick hug, not like the one he had given you that night he had driven you the night after you’d spent your entire night in a bar. You had come to realise, he became braver once some time had passed, and so did you. 
So you headed inside, where Robin was waiting for the both of you in the bar, a warm welcome and a big cheers with some beers that you grabbed as you moved further into the pit. 
The crowd was electric, everyone cheering for the show to start, eager to sing along with the band. You followed along, screamed when Corroded Coffin finally came on stage, whoo’d Eddie when he asked How are you doing Indianapolis and laughed when he admitted that he missed saying how are you Hawkins. 
Robin cheered the loudest and it made Steve laugh. One of those authentic, closing your eyes and holding your stomach kind of laughs. You thought that it was one of the highlights of the night already. 
But as these things often go, once Eddie’s band was over, and the next one came, the bar got even more crowded, and the lights felt brighter, and everyone seemed to be looking at you, judging or god knows what. Everyone seemed to bump into you, and you had already pulled the glue out of your empty cristal bottle on both sides. Breathing was becoming a hard task, and so did hearing anything that was being said to you. 
“Honey” You heard Steve as soon as you felt his warm hand on your shoulder. You looked up to him, a haze in your eyes.”Are you okay?” He halved screamed into your ear, his breath lingering into your skin. 
You pull him closer for a moment, afraid he might not listen. 
“Too many people.” You’re not sure if he could hear you, or what he could do. You try even harder to relax your breathing, to stop looking around. But it all ends when you feel his fingers intertwined with yours. 
You look up to him, he just nods to Robin who nods back at him, and he starts walking to the back of the pit, the lights seem to not burn anymore, and the people are few and far between. He just stays there, with you for a second before he opens his mouth. Looking at you and the way your eyes are scanning every single person in the room, looking for something that you don’t know what is.
“Honey?” There it is again, the soft worried Steve voice, his attention only on you. 
You look back at him, as you feel his hand grabbing yours thighter. He’s the only thing you’re looking at now. 
“Do you need to get out? Get some air?” He knows you won’t actually answer, but takes the nodding that you do as a clear enough sign. 
The creaking of the door and the friendly doorman brings you back down to earth, and so does the wind hitting your chest. 
“Better?” He asks again, desperate for some sort of confirmation from you. 
“Yeah, I just- Sorry…” You sort of mumble, more to yourself than to him. 
In that moment you realise that your hands are still tangled together, and the blood rushes to your cheeks as soon as you look down at them. They fit together so naturally, you think. Like a missing piece of a puzzle. 
“Don’t apologize. We’ll stay here as long as you need, ‘s fine.” You instinctively bite the inside of your cheek as you nod at him, a soft smile, a thank you of sort appears on your face, as does a grin on his. 
Without letting go of you, he reaches down into his jeans front pocket, and takes out a box of Camel, offering you to take one. Smoking might be bad for your lungs, but it does help with regulating your breathing, and he knew that’s just what you needed, and honestly, you were craving one, so you nodded again, searching for a lighter with the cigarette already in between your lips. Before you even find it, you feel the warmth of fire close to your mouth, and you just inhale the smoke. 
“Thank you…” He shakes his head, as he inches closer to you, the same strand of hair falling between his eyes again. 
“There’s no need for that.” He whispers, his words just as sweet as he is. His free hand pushes your hair behind your ear, and falls slowly to the nape of your neck, letting it rest there for just a second, his thumb stroking the end of your jaw in soft short motions, holding you up so you look at him, your doe eyes looking deep into his, he swears he could melt right here and there. You were driving him crazier everyday with the way you looked at him. 
For a second there, he thinks you might even love him back. 
“I just don’t know why I get like that, when there’s so many… I dunno” you scoff off, as your shoulders shrug ever so slightly, enough for him to catch, enough for your hair to move again and let the smell of your shampoo reach him. “I’m okay, don’t worry.” You say with a smile. 
He looks deep into his eyes, looking for any sign that you might be lying, he doesn’t find any. And he likes to think that you’re better because of him. It's funny how right he is. 
“We can stay here as long as you need.” Steve reasures you once again, getting closer again. Your body and his only a push away from touching. 
“You’re always so sweet to me.” You’re thinking out loud now, you bite your lower lip as soon as you see him mask his blush with a soft chuckle, as his grin deepens, and you stop for a second to look at his pretty pink lips. You even let yourself imagine what it would be like to kiss them. 
Steve debates what to do next. He knows you’re not lying, he knows that you’re being sincere and truthful. He can tell by the way your eyes are half lidded, looking at him like you’re in the safest space possible -even when you’re actually outside downtown Indianapolis- so in the end, he just wraps his arms around you. And he holds you even tighter when he feels you wrapping your arms behind his neck, and the way you stand on your tiptoes so you can hold him closer, your leg between his, his hands playing with the ends of your air. He breathes you in, intoxicating himself with the way you smell. You’re worried he’ll feel just how fast your heart is beating. But you’re too occupied smiling deeply and sincerely. 
He feels safe. 
Yes, there might be some butterflies, but they’re not nervous ones, it’s all just calmness. Love even. 
-
He ends up paying for your drinks, and you spend the night dancing at the back of the pit with Robin and eventually Eddie joins you. You laugh, and dance around, sing the songs off key with Robin making Eddie laugh as he joins you. Admiring the way Steve covers his face embarrassed, that the idiots causing the whole club to cheer you on as you move are indeed his friends. But what makes you have the deepest smile is everytime you catch Steve eyes, thay always seem to be on you. He even dances with you a couple times when Robin or Eddie go away to the bathroom or to grab more drinks. 
You don’t care because he is here and everything feels right. 
But the night was coming to an end, and you still were buzzing with energy. 
Even outside, where the cold wind wrapped around you you were still singing and dancing until Eddie started speaking. 
“Steve, can I take your car?” He asks, and it makes you all turn around and look at him. 
“What for? Where’s your van?” Robin followed, her voice raised a little too loud. 
“I think Gareth might have taken it.” Eddie explains as he points at his van driving away, with Gareth in the driver’s seat. You can’t help but laugh a bit, stopping slowly as you feel Steve laying his arm around your shoulders, you let yourself think of it as an embrace. Or maybe he was just cold. 
“Who’ll drive me home?” He mutters as he searches for the keys in his pocket. 
“I’ll drive you.” You say, looking up at him. Steve’s eyes shine brighter, with that look. A look you have only seen in him once before, long ago. 
“Sure.” He mutters, a grin in his face. “You won’t kill us?” He jokes as he pushes some hair away from your face with the hand that rests right where your neck meets your shoulder.
“I’ll come with you” Robin mumbles as she approaches Eddie, her eyebrows raised. 
Steve knows that if Robin could talk to him now she would plead with him, to actually make a move. He decides that she’s right. 
“Alright, let’s get home.” Eddie winks at you, a look that begs you to be careful. He grabs the keys that Steve throws him, the jingle of them making you realise that this was actually happening. 
You blame it on the alcohol. But you have to admit that holding his waist was something you have wanted to do for so long its feels fucking angelic once your fingers touch his skin, under his shirt, right above the seam of his jeans. 
Steve chews gum when he’s nervous, and the minty flavor, or maybe the amount of beer inside his system makes him say the most stupid thing ever. 
“Do you like gum?” 
“Yeah” 
“You want some?” 
“Sure.” You stop, expecting him to reach down his pocket and grab the small packet. You part your lips open expecting him to do so. Instead, Steve in a bold move opens his mouth and pulls you closer. 
Before you can even process what he’s doing, his thumb reaches your jaw, opening your mouth a bit more for you, and you see the way his tongue places the minty gum on your lips. You had closed your eyes. Thinking he was going to do something else. 
It had made you nervous and weak all the same. You can’t help but think, as you take a few steps, your hand holding even tighter onto him, that was one of the hottest things you had ever seen. 
It got better. 
After a few steps he talked again. His voice sultier, deeper. His eyes somehow were darker, but still looked like they were full of adoration for you. 
“Does that gum still have some taste on it?” 
“Yeah, minty” You manage to say. 
“Can I have some?” 
This time around, it's you who grabs him. And you can feel the way he smiles at that, and the way his fingers hold your face up again to meet him. This time it’s you who gives him the gum back. 
Only, you place it between your lips, and it's his tongue that gets it. 
In that moment you know, you’re fucked. 
And so does he. 
-
“Honey?” He asks as he sees you pulling into his street. 
The whole drive back home had been exactly like the last time. Except this time the way he would caress your leg felt hungry for your touch back, and your fingers would end up intertwined, singing the songs that came into the radio, not really paying attention, all of it focused on the way he was playing with your fingers. 
“Mmmh?” 
“My car keys may have been chained to my house keys.” He admits, embarrassed, as he covers his face. You can’t help but look at him and laugh a bit. 
“S’okay, you can sleepover.” He nods and you change directions. 
And before you know it you’re already parked, and he’s already following you inside. 
That’s when it hits you. 
Steve is in your room. 
Steve is sleeping over in your bed. 
Steve had practically kissed you. 
whatthehellisgoingon
You shake your head, not wanting to read too much into things that haven’t and might never happen. 
“I uh… I’m going to change.” You whisper, a bit of shame could be felt on your words, and Steve just nodded, lost in the sight that was you in your room. “Do you need anything?” 
“No, I… Usually just sleep with my boxers on.” That confession made you blush and bite your lower lip as you nodded. Not really knowing what to do or say. 
So you just turned around, you took off your bra, tossing it on the floor before you took off the white tank you had. You reached for your sleep shirt. An old grey shirt that was way overdue to throw away, but it was long enough and soft enough that you felt it was perfect for sleeping in. So, Steve just enjoyed the show. 
He stayed there, watching the way your body moved. He was the one that had his eyebrows raised, his chest racing and his cheeks flushed. He was lost in you. And you were painfully obvious that he was looking, maybe that’s why you take a bit longer to take off your tank top before putting on the gray shirt. Maybe that's why your heart skips a beat when you hear the sound of his belt hitting the ground at the same time that his jeans did. While you took your own jeans off, he took off his shirt. 
You knew you had to turn around now. 
And as you did you go lost in him. 
Him standing there, in nothing but his black boxers, framing all of him. Him and his chest with some hair, trailing all the way down to his waistband. That was an image you probably would never be able to forget. 
He took the first step. A soft grin appears in his lips once again. As he pushes the same flock of hair behind your ear, you can't help but tilt your head into his touch. He takes another step forwards, and just looks at you, deep into your eyes. You both chuckle, nervously at the situation, and like before, he holds you. Thight. Only this time, you can feel him against your leg. It makes you press your own legs together a bit more. 
Once he lets go, you slide into the bed, and he closes the lights, following you closely. 
“Is it okay if you hug me?” You ask. 
“Mmh.” He’s at a loss for words. 
He cuddles you, feeling you closer than ever before. And one of his hands gets lost into your thigh, right where your waistband meets your skin, tracing it. Softly. It drives you insane. Steve’s breathing into your hair, and you can feel how his breathing is fastening, just as much he can feel yours, by the way your stomach goes up and down. He can’t help himself anymore. He leaves a wet kiss on your neck. 
That’s all it takes. 
You turn around and you know you’re fucked. You can’t hold yourself anymore. You explote. 
You kiss him. 
The way his lips press against yours feels like he really wanted this, maybe even as much as you did. Your body pulls him closer, and his leg finds itself tangled in between yours. He’s lost in you and the way your mouth feels. He bites your lower lip, softly. And as soon as you feel the tug a soft whimper escapes your lips. Steve melts into you even more, his legs putting pressure in that spot between your legs that is already throbbing for him. Your hands find the back of his neck, and become buried into his hair. His soft chestnut hair. His hands begin to train up, inside your shirt. Holding your waist harder than before. Another moan escapes your kiss swollen lips, and he grunts in return. 
He tries to memorise you, and the way you look like now. To him, you’re a goddess fallen from the sky, and he’s the lucky one. 
He climbs above you, tracing kisses down your neck, as his hands travel up, up enough to meet your breast and press down, even carefully he’s strong enough and skilled enough to pinch your nipples, making them hard. And your legs wrap around him, and you can’t quite believe just how big he’s gotten just from kissing you. 
His hands take off your shirt and as soon as he looks at you he’s a goner. 
“Fuck, you’re beautifull honey.” He groans. A deep voice you’ve never heard from him. 
It makes you pull him closer. And he starts to move, his cock and your clit being only separated by the small fabric between you both. 
“Can I-” He cuts you off as he looks up at you, stopping the trail of kisses he wanted to finish on your left breast. 
“You can do anything you want to me honey” 
You can’t help yourself. The wetness patch only growing on your thong. You needed him, but you were so desperate to touch him, to see him. 
You flipped him around, leaving him laid on your mattress, his hands up in shock. He’s surprised by you in the best way possible. 
You were the one kissing him senseless now, as you grind on top of him. HE grew harder and stiffer with every time your clit pressed against him. His hands grabbed your ass in that moment, hard and burying his fingers as deep as he could. You wasted no time kissing every beauty mark that you could see, slowly going down his stomach, his breath shortening, sucking in and groaning your name in the most delicious way you have never heard anyone say it. 
Your hands found the hem of his underwear and pulled it down. He was so big. His pink tip already wet with pre-cum, and it was all because and for you. Your eyes widened with desire, you had to taste him. 
So you did. 
It only took a lick for Steve to shiver, and that made nothing but turn you on even more. His hand had now started to press on your clit through the fabric. It didn’t matter, it felt too good. 
So, as you looked deep into his eyes, you wrapped your lips around him, and you went down. 
Steve had never been more desperate, the eye contact, you and your pretty doe eyes looking at him like he was the only thing in the world. 
His fingers had pushed your thong to your side, and started messing around your entrance, it wasn’t until his waist flinched forward, making you swallow him whole, that he didn’t actually finger you. 
But once he did, he couldn’t stop, and neither could you. 
The way you moaned, with him still inside you, the way your waist moved, letting him get more aces into you, it drove him mad, he needed you, like really needed you. 
“Steve, please” You begged. 
That’s all it took. 
His hands took off your thong and pulled you up, he kissed you deeply, his tongue getting lost with yours. Your soft lips fit perfectly with his, and the wetness of his cock still in them. 
He was above you again. Three fingers in, your legs already up, he had you prepared you enough for him to enter, but anyway, when you felt the way his cock slided into you, your walls tensed up for a second, and you both moaned as soon as you felt each other. 
“God, you feel so nice honey” He whispered into your ear before biting it. 
Your legs wrapped around him, tightly, and your hands were on his back, pushing him deeper. He wanted to go slow, but seeing you so helpless, so needy for him, made him pick up the pace. With every thrust, your eyes rolled deeper into your head, your muscles relaxed, and your feet were pointed. 
The warmth of his skin felt so good against yours you felt as if it would never be enough, even if you wanted to scream his name, you couldn’t. Everyone was sleeping. So you did the only thing you could.
“I’ve wanted you for so long Steve '' You whispered into his ears in between thrusts. You felt how his head hangs lower after that, his back arched so he could reach even lower. And when you thought he was as deep as he could, he placed an arm behind you, reaching that place that even you couldn’t. 
“So have I honey.” He admitted before kissing you, a deep, wet kiss. Followed by many more repressed moans and loud groans. “I’m all yours.” 
“I’m all yours” You repeated. 
He grabbed your leg and pushed it up, he was so deep now you could feel him everywhere. You were lost in him. The way his hair bounced, the way his eyes looked at you, his lips swollen because he couldn’t and wouldn’t stop kissing you. 
He was a goner. And so were you. 
You hadn’t come this hard in so long. 
You melted into eachothers arms. 
You had a silent moment, where it was all soft kisses and caresses. You couldn’t quite believe that that had just happened. 
Or how good it had been. 
“I meant it.” You heard him whisper, his lips pressed against your ear. 
“What?” 
“I’m all yours.” He repeats. Leaving a kiss in your hair. “I’ve always been.”
“I mean it too.” You let him know, your nose brushing his, your fingers tangled with his. “I’ve liked you for so long, my love.” 
He laughs a bit. Maybe it was the confession he had just got out of you, maybe it was because you had just called him my love. 
“God, me too.” He finally admits, a weight being pulled away from his chest. “But I thought you had a thing for Eddie.” 
“And I thought you still loved-” He shuts you up with a kiss. 
“We broke up because I was falling for you.” He finally admits. 
You can’t stop smiling or kissing. 
You don’t think you ever will. 
-
if you enjoyed it please leave a comment or reblog. i promise it makes a huge difference <3
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noxtivagus · 1 year
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4:44 am late night thoughts under cut bcs i want to talk so much but tags reached way above cap c:
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#🤍#🌙.thoughts#GENUINELY I'M DOING GOOD RN. DEFINITELY. /gen#i just have a lot of thoughts. i find myself rambling a lot every time i start writing in tags oh dear#these r very intimate thoughts of mine at this very late hour#i don't mind though. here online. maybe to whoever may read it they could see some part of themselves in it#i've always loved the ways n possibilities of how we may influence each other in this world#one reason why i write. & why i share. is to make my own opportunity of that possibility w others#sometimes actually w my attunement for these deeper intricacies in life i wonder if i'm even. idk normally fun to be around#but i've had ppl say i'm funny. i've made people laugh n smile. maybe that's proof enough for me that my existence#was loved in those moments. even now maybe for just. being who i am. maybe it really is true.#i find it hard to believe i don't think such beauty is meant for me.#but i think. ultimately. i do deserve the same things that. i think others deserve. i deserve it too.#yeah often i feel like i don't belong in this world but this is enough to keep me going. me. & you.#everything in my worlds. in this universe. & everyone in my life. yeah. life goes by far too fast for hesitation and regrets.#i think it's so beautiful how in a way. you n i. we're so similar yet so different. i wnt to learn sm more abt everyone/everything around m#i think i wna make a sideblog for stuff like this. i realize at heart i'm genuinely a person fond of sharing their thoughts n emotions#i've rambled to myself a lot before in threads in discord servers w friends. in my own discord server. & in tumblr tags#i'm not used to people interacting to it. or being necessarily listened to. or knowing that i am read and seen but i don't really need that#i live like this for me. first and foremost. this is one part of my own inner world#oh god usually i definitely don't talk this much though but it's really really late at night ( early morning )#i'll try not to delete this when i wake up bcs even if i get shy or embarrassed then that'll change nothing deep down#n it's not like it'll directly impact my life yeah? i should have nothing to fear#that ffxiv friend i spent time with earlier today said they'll challenge their shyness#motivated me more to do the same. it's hard n it gets uncomfortable at times n i will experience drawbacks but#i will work hard to challenge myself & become a better person. to forge ahead as i always have.#this is part of who i've always been & part of who i'm growing to be.#why should i hide? in hindsight i will definitely learn to manage it better bcs i should keep my life more private to be safe but#rn tonight i don't think i'll worry. not now. THAT SAID THOUGH i will actually sleep vvv soon fr now c:#oh my god last thought though but i'm rlly rlly curious of others too.... but that's enough thinking for tonight. i will sleep Soon ><
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seraphmeraph · 6 months
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Decided to change it up a bit
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Headcanons - Lin Kuei brothers
MK1 NSFW headcanons of Tomas Vrbada, Kuai Liang, and Bi Han.
TW: oral sex, p in v, praise kink, gn but might be a hint of afab, rough sex, degrading.
A/N: feel free to send requests cause I can't think. I didn't proof read again so sorry about that
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Tomas Vrbada • Smoke
Needs constant reassurance when you guys get intimate.
You can't stay quiet around this man because he's gonna start overthinking and believe that he's not pleasuring you enough.
"Am I doing good, my princess?" Tomas asks, his voice laced with worry, his head buried between your thighs, lapping away at your heat. If you don't praise him, he'll get sad. "Please, are you feeling good?" He says, trying his hardest to hear your compliments, curling his fingers inside you.
He is literally so scared of hurting you; he immediately stopped and comforted you the first time he heard you whimper. Even after you tell him it's just a response, he still peppers your face with kisses, telling you how good you feel wrapped around his cock.
Tomas doesn't hold back with his volume, moaning and groaning in your ear. This guy definitely whimpers if you tease him enough.
He was gentle yet quick with his thrusts. "Mmph!" He bit his lip, feeling himself nearing his release, but he wanted to prolong your pleasure. "So warm…" He moaned into your ear.
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Kuai Liang • Scorpion
Kuai Liang cannot keep his hands off you, even in public. He often tenderly holds onto your waist, playfully whispering suggestive things into your ear.
"I can't wait til you take this dress off," Kuai whispered, his warm fingers digging into your skin.
He loves it when you make marks on him, of course, where nobody can see. Scratch at his back, give him hickeys, love bites. He loves seeing your markings on his body.
He goes feral for cowgirl. Seeing you bounce up and down on his cock, the way your heat sinks down perfectly onto his dick. It's his favorite position, and you can tell by the way he moans and grabs at your body, touching you all over.
"You're doing wonderful," He groaned, mesmerized by how your heat swallowed his cock. "Just like that, my love." One hand grabbed at your breasts while the other rested on your thigh.
As you approach your climax, he'll tell you how much of a good girl you are and how much he loves you. He'll basically walk you through your release.
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Bi Han • Sub Zero
He loves making you beg. He will edge you for hours to hear you whine and whimper his name.
"Bi-Bi Han," You choked out a sob. "Please, please let me come," You tried to reason. You were sat on his cock at his desk as he wrote something on a scroll. As you tried to wiggle, his grip was tight on your hip, keeping you in place.
"Be a good whore and stop moving," He sneered. "Maybe if you beg enough, I'll let you."
He gets jealous VERY easily. Seeing a man strike up a friendly conversation with you? His hands will be wrapped around you in seconds. As soon as you both are in private, you better pray. It's going to be a rough night.
Loves hair pulling, spanking, and leaving hickeys on you.
He presses his hand against your stomach to feel himself sliding in and out. It drives him crazy and makes him impossibly more possessive.
Sometimes, in the heat of the moment, he'll make the room chillier, ice forming under his fingertips. Occasionally he'll make his cock cold, groaning as your pussy warms it up. When he comes in you, you'll feel a cold and cool sensation in your stomach.
"Such a good slut, all wet and ready for me," He spoke, as he slid his dick in between your folds, teasing you. His tip was cold and made shivers run through your body. He slowly entered you, your warmth enveloping him.
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etheries1015 · 6 days
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He walks in on you touching yourself... (18+ Minors DNI)
General warnings: Gender-neutral reader. Can be read as established or non-established relationship, completely up to whatever your cup of tea is... (Reader for Azul and the tweels is pretty confident and daring. be warned.) Also not proof read.
TW: Touching himself while watching you masturbate, 'unbeknownst' to you. Being caught, mentions of heat.
Featuring: Lilia (separate) , Azul (separate), and the tweels (together...might be OOC. I don't write for them often wahhhh)
Lilia
It was obvious by the sounds of wetness and low whines ringing through the hall what was conspiring in your bedroom. Lilia had dropped by simply to play some games or to say hello, but was pleasantly greeted by the glorious sight before him after making his way down the hall towards your sleeping chambers. With the door cracked slightly, the red-eyed fae had clear few of your naked body sprawled on your bed, hands working at your groin with such vigor and excitement. Fluids ran down your thighs and a layer of sweat clearly coating your flushed body, telling him you have been at this for quite some time. With a raised eyebrow and a smirk quirking on the side of his lips, he could feel his erection pressing against the cloth of his pants practically begging to be freed.
He had little shame when it came to things of pleasure, he himself thoroughly enjoyed indulging in such activities when time permitted. It's a normal part of life, and although he felt mildly guilty for thinking such things when you were touching yourself unaware of his gaze...all reason left his mind the moment your lips uttered his name in a moan that would have been barely audible for a normal human to hear. His eyes open in surprise with his smirk turning into a dark grin, fangs poking out as he bit his lip and began to slowly unzip his trousers.
Freeing himself from his confines, he watched your fingers eagerly working themselves in your hole and the other teasing the outer parts of your body. He thought to himself how much he wanted to be inside you as his cock twitched, yet also wondering how he could just stand there and watch you get off, knowing it was his image in your mind while you so eagerly found your release. Would he ruin the mood if he opened the door and presented himself at that moment? Would you be embarrassed and no longer in the mood? He slowly began using a hand to pump his cock while he watched you through the crack of the door, a satisfied sigh escaping his lips and lustful eyes watching earnestly as you switch positions. You were so...thorough in the way you touched yourself, Lilia almost found himself envious at your own hands stroking attentively to your sensitive spots rather than him.
The second time you moaned his name, he broke in his resolve of keeping his endeavor behind your door a secret falter rather quickly. Removing his hand from his throbbing and flushed cock and lazily slipping his boxers back over his erection, Lilia allowed his presence to be heard as he creaked the door open. Hearing your movements stop suddenly and a small (and rather adorable) gasp escape your lips, the fae watched as you were quick to cover up with the sheets and face flushed a deep scarlet that only enhanced his desire to ruin you further.
"Now now~" Lilia purred, "You were so vocal before, moaning my name like an animal in heat..." He crawled onto the bed, leaning towards you as your gaze so obviously flickered from his piercing eyes to the tent in his boxers, taking note of his unzipped pants and wet spot that soaked through the cloth. His hand quickly grabbed your cheeks and lifted your gaze to his, lips crashing against yours.
"How about you moan for me again, my precious bat? Hmm? I wonder just how loud I could get you the mewl when rather than your fingers, it's my cock buried deep inside you..."
Azul
Azul had noticed something was awry when you weren't there to greet him immediately at the entrance of Ramshackle. The door had been unlocked, almost as if inviting him right in without a worry in the world. He often scolded you for such acts, being rather wary of intruders himself and understanding your disposition of being the sole human in the dorm, he was certain to give you a lecture as he often had.
Walking deeper into the dorm attempting to find you, he could smell something sweet and alluring, something that slowly yet almost simultaneously left his cheeks flushing a slight tint of pink and skin moist with heat at the touch. It was almost a sickening sweet smell- something that he was familiar with only by the definitions of the textbooks.
Heat. Someone was in heat, he could feel it affecting him as such. He took a gulp as his instincts left him wandering mindlessly to the source, hearing the feeble pants of a familiar voice and the sound of wet and sticky skin filling the air as he came closer to the source of the sickeningly sweet scent. Azul began trembling as if he were entering some sort of forbidden den in which he should not be entering. He noticed at the end of the hall a door open, wider than one may think should be. Curious and trembling with anticipation, the merman peaked his head through the rather wide crack of the door, stumbling upon a rather...interesting scene.
He couldn't help but let out an audible gasp, eyes widening before slapping a hand over his mouth and looking away. He pressed his back against the wall, looking down at the clear erection that poked at the cloth of his dress pants. It hurt almost, enough that Azul found himself almost unable to move with the itching need to unzip his pants and release himself of this burning sensation immediately. Every time he closed his eyes, he could see what he had just witnessed...the beloved prefect, someone who was well respected and known around the campus, legs wide on top of the blankets for anyone to see as your fingers buried deep inside your hole with your other hand twisting your hardened nipple. Your hair was a sweaty tangled mess, mouth open lips glistening with drool and lust.
Azul was not used to such erotic behaviors being so close and in eyeshot of him, much less affecting him the way you seemed to be. He couldn't help but guiltily open his eyes and glance again, watching through the cracked door and rubbing his legs uncomfortably. He let out a deep sigh as his hands moved with a mind of their own, dipping the inside of his pants and boxers in an attempt to stroke himself for some sort of release of the discomfort his hardened cock had caused. He watched you with his mouth ajar, his heart pounding so loud he almost feared you would hear it. Your moans began to become louder, almost as if...on purpose. Azul continued to rub his shaft with hesitant and trembling hands, before a moment passed and it seemed...like you two had made eye contact.
It was almost a split second, where he felt as if your gaze had locked onto his through the door. Yet you turned your attention back to your naked body, a sly smile crawling onto your lips. That split second cause his heart to drop straight into the pit of his stomach with guilt, yet at the same time such risk left his body trembling as he used one hand to muffle a high pitched whine that escaped his lips as he shamefully finished in his pants almost as quickly as he had begun. With legs that were shaking and a heart beating so rapid he felt it would pop out of his chest at any second, the merman pursed his lips and wiped his brow, finally finding the courage to use his legs to make a hasty exit...you were quick to interrupt his escape.
"Awwee...did you cum already, Azul?" He froze as you called his name, Azul letting out a yelp of surprise and hung his head low in almost shame.
"No need to be shy," You called out, "Come here. Let your prefect take care of our pretty little octopus..."
Jade + Floyd
You were a brazen soul, something that both Jade and Floyd would admire. Often times your brave endeavors left them astonished and intrigued all the same. The three of you were doing your weekly movie night, but the two could already tell something was different in your actions. The way you would rub your legs together and the sweet scent wafting off of your figure left the two side-eyeing each other with knowing intent. The movie was the last thing on your mind, for under the sheets the warmth that was leaving your bottom half aching with desire left your hands wandering beneath the blankets almost unable to hold back your urges.
"Are you alright?" Jade inquired, watching your focused face flush as you looked up at him with surprise at the question. He looked down at you almost knowingly, his typical smile leaving you unaware of the thoughts that were behind those eyes. You gave him a slight smile and a nod of your head, burying yourself deeper in the sheets and halting your hands from going beneath the cloth of your pants like you so desperately wanted to. A few moments of the movie going on, and you were vividly aware of where each of the twins were on both sides of you.
Floyd was brazenly wrapping an arm from behind your shoulders, while Jade sat with one of your legs intertwining with yours beneath the blanket. You found yourself throbbing more intensely below the pile of warm blankets, the heat becoming far more unbearable as your hands began to snake underneath the blankets and into your pants with no self-control and little regard for the two attractive men who were accompanying you. You pursed your lips and inched your fingers toward your groin, a needy sigh escaping your trembling lips as you began to slowly gratify yourself careful not to be loud or obvious. You couldn't help it, you were so desperately seeking release, and patience wasn't always one of your strong suits.
This went on for a mere minute before a hand landed on top of yours through the mountain of cloth that separated your skin from his hand, Jades face peering closer to yours with eyes glinting with mischief as his nose pressed against yours. "You're rather distracted," Jade hummed, eyes closing as he disregarded the movie that was still playing, "If I remove these blankets, what do you think we will see? Hmm? Something naughty?" you gave a shy nod in response, almost as if testing them to see if their blatant words would become materialized in something more. He glanced up to his brother, Floyd who had a wide toothy grin and a tilt of his head. He moved forward to take a whiff of you, his own cheeks becoming flushed a deep scarlet color while pulling you closer to his side.
"little Shrimpy is in heeatt..." Floyd sang, "I didn't know humans can get that, too. But it's sweet, real sweet," He purred. Jade moved away from you, inching the blanket off of your body to reveal yourself with legs held together and hands taken away from pleasuring your sensitive spot. At the same time, You could hear the unzipping of pants as they both released themselves from their pants, you watched in excitement and lustful eyes as the eels began doing as you had done, shamelessly and brazenly touching themselves with little regard for the place and company they were in. The twins encouraged you by each using a hand to grab a knee and spread your legs open, showing your arousal as your own hands twitched with anticipation and neediness. Shy at the whole endeavor, you found yourself hesitating despite their eagerness.
"Don't get shy now," Jade said, beginning to stroke himself and urging you to do the same.
"Yeah, You started this," Floyd pointed out, "let's have fun together...isn't that the whole point?"
"You must be trying so hard to hold back, aren't you? Let it all go...you're good at surprising us, and were so desperate a mere moment ago.... So go on, give us a show."
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steddie-there · 1 year
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They don't acknowledge it.
When Steve and Eddie share a bed - which, after that first nightmare-fueled middle-of-the-night phone call a few weeks after spring break, that first quiet "Come over," happens increasingly often until there's hardly a night they can't be found together - they don't acknowledge it.
They don't talk about how, though they start on either side of the bed (a decent space between them if they're in Steve's, elbows knocking if they're in Eddie's), it only takes a few minutes of anxious wakefulness before they tuck themselves together, arms wrapped tight and legs tangled.
It's just an unspoken understanding that Eddie sleeps better with Steve's arms curled around him, that Steve can't sleep without his palm over Eddie's heart, the rhythmic proof that Eddie is still alive beating into his hand.
So they don't acknowledge it.
Not when Steve starts pressing a kiss to the side of Eddie's head as they settle in, or when Eddie begins bringing Steve's hand to his lips before placing it back over his own heart.
And they don't acknowledge it when it starts to bleed over into their waking hours. When sitting next to each other on the couch during movie nights becomes Steve leaning his head on Eddie's shoulder becomes Eddie curled up on top of Steve, their eyes trained on the tv but their fingers tangled together on Steve’s chest.
When Eddie's regular visits to Family Video start and end with a hug that lingers maybe a little longer than strictly necessary and Eddie drapes himself over Steve's back to look at something in the magazine he's reading and they aren't more than an arm's length from each other the whole time Eddie is there.
When Robin sends Steve a raised eyebrow stare across the diner table, Eddie pressed against his side in the booth opposite her. She kicks Steve's leg under the table when he doesn't respond and he kicks her back, raises an eyebrow of his own that says not now.
And so they don't acknowledge it.
They don't acknowledge it until the sleepover when the kids beg Steve and Eddie to stay downstairs with them, to not retreat to Steve's room, to actually be a part of the sleepover like Robin and Nancy whispering in the corner, like Jonathan and Argyle giggling by the fireplace. When the combined forces of Erica's, El's, and Max's puppy dog eyes have him grumblingly setting up another sleeping area for him and Eddie. When Eddie smirks at him and knocks their shoulders together and Steve shrugs with a grin of his own that says I've got a soft spot for my girls, so sue me.
They don't acknowledge it until, after those few minutes of laying still next to each other, Eddie rolls into Steve's arms and Steve presses his lips to the side of Eddie's head and Eddie tugs Steve's hand to his lips and Dustin, observant and tactful as ever, asks, "What, are you two, like, dating now?"
There's a beat of silence before several muffled thumps and Dustin's, "Hey, ow, that hurt, jeez, it was just a question," sound from across the room, both Will and Lucas having kicked him while El smacked his arm. Max's hissed, "You can't just ask people that, Dustin, what the hell," has Robin and Nancy stifling giggles behind their hands.
Meanwhile, after a stiff, frozen moment, Eddie turns to catch Steve's eye and quietly asks, "Are we - ?" at the same time that Steve murmurs, "Do you - ?" They pause, only to speak in sync again when Steve answers, "I mean - " and Eddie says, "If you - "
They pause, matching shy smiles on their faces. Eddie pulls a strand of hair over his mouth, hiding behind it, before taking a deep breath and answering both their questions. "Yeah," he says.
"Yeah?" Steve asks, and the hope in it has Eddie squeezing the fingers still in his grasp.
"Yeah," he says, smiling softly.
"Okay," Steve sighs happily. He pulls Eddie's hair aside, gently presses a kiss to the side of his neck.
Eddie leans into it with a happy sigh of his own. Then he calls across the room, "Hey, Henderson."
The whisper-fight across the room immediately stills as they all turn to Eddie.
"Yeah, we're dating."
For a moment, it feels like everyone is holding their breath, then Dustin says, "Oh. Okay," and Robin calls out, "Congrats, Dingus," and the conversation gradually drifts to another topic.
Steve pulls Eddie closer, nuzzling into the space between his shoulder and neck. Eddie turns, just a little, just enough for Steve to lean down and kiss him, soft, chaste. Eddie leans into it, presses their foreheads together when they part, then settles back into Steve's hold.
"Goodnight, Eddie."
"Goodnight, Steve."
Tomorrow, they both know, there will be more to say. Questions to answer. Explanations to give. But, for now, this is all the acknowledgment they need.
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