ffreak4 freak scene

a 4-part rec list of my fave drarry fics - the thrillers, dramas, soft bois, and wankbanks getting me through 2020′s shitstorm

[ for my fellow fledgling drarry stans! the drama list is here and, well. like i didn’t initially intend to go off in the mini-reviews beneath every rec but it’s just that you can't nOT yell about drarry as classic literary foils!! also it’s my dumb sideblog so i decided there are no rules and i get to be annoying about good writing.

but rly, the whole premise of the drarry pairing is shaped by this genre and if the ~serious world of serious published writers~ weren’t absolute cowards, they would admit that drama fic authors have contributed more to the genre than the average shit you can find at your local chain bookstore. so that's that on thAT. & if you love a fic here, don't forget to follow the authors, leave kudos & comments on their work, send them nice msgs bc they do all this shit for free xoxo ]

part 2: dramas

mood: for when I need emotional catharsis and maybe 7 hours to sob/brood about loneliness, the cost of love, & the perpetual fear of being truly known

includes: angst, hurt/comfort, reconciliation fics. it’s cruelty o’clock folks and someone is about to say/do something Fucked Up that they can’t take back. but don’t worry!! there will be a Reckoning feat. hamlet-worthy monologues, ugly truths, unbridled rage, trauma, insecurity, and just a fuck ton of tears!! but maybe even tender apologies and mended things.

(Un)wanted by @aibidil​ - 36k - E | Ginny's pregnant, then she's not and Harry's single. Harry, again with no family, doesn't know what to do with this turn of events, or how to find a new life—post-war, post-Ginny, post-abortion—in which he belongs. He doesn't expect that life to include dancing to the Backstreet Boys with Hermione and Draco Malfoy. A story of finding belonging in the unexpected. | --- can a fic be tender and unflinching at the same time? bc this story strikes that balance rly well and for a piece about unwantedness, it is incredibly humanizing. ginny holding her own, draco being gentle but not letting harry play victim, hermione calling harry “hazzah” and just the way this friendship insists on the validity of found families even when harry is spiraling?? and you’re forced to consider that no one has the monopoly on fucked-upness and that doesn’t absolve us of the ways we hurt each other but it means that everyone has the same potential to be better after being broken. goD JUST READ IT, OKAY.

Blood Magic, the series by @houseofhebrideanblacks and @thestralsofspinnersend 335k - E “Later that night. . .Draco wondered at the depths of magic, its breadth and scope. The ways in which life pervades and eludes death, the ways in which they endure all manners of small and large deaths within their lives.” -- if you don't read any other fic on this list, i hope you read this series bc holy shit it’s breathtaking. harry’s a recovering addict, draco’s recovering from abuse, and in a cottage within the forbidden forest begins an unlikely partnership as the boys take up the tedious work of healing. there are thestrals and everyone's in therapy. there are whole chapters of cottagecore drarry. it's a beautiful exploration of how we bare the immensity of loss against the miracles of birth and regrowth. 

Ship of Theseus by GallaPlacidia - 18k - T “A ship in a full sail, a ship in a state of decay, a ship that had been rebuilt, slightly different. A repeating cycle. “What makes the ship the same?” asked Harry. “I don’t know. There must be something in it that lasts across the changes.” -- DO YOU KNOW HOW THIS QUOTE LIVES RENT FREE IN MY SAD, SAD BRAIN. DO YOU KNOW HOW I LOSE SLEEP THINKING ABOUT THE FUCKING SHIP OF THESEUS. it’s a memory loss fic and everything is so unFAIR. you want to murder harry sometimes bc he’s such a shiT and you suffer through the ways he questions desire, penance, redemption, true love. and by the end, you want to believe in those golden slumber lyrics: “once, there was a way to get back home” 

Yours to Keep by @dracoismytrashson​ - 135k - E i love the university setting, i love getting to see harry and draco’s first forays into a real LGBTQ community, the class and race structures outside of the wizarding world. i love that this is the context in which they’re allowed to confront the shittiness of PTSD, anxiety, depression etc. as they come together and fall apart against each other’s traumas. it makes the ending feel earned af. “Baby, we’ve been easing into it for a decade.” -- my god this line

Away Childish Things by @letteredlettered​ - 153k - T  this fic is devastating. like, completely forget whatever reticence you might have towards a de-aging fic and read this. the de-aging premise allows the author to cut through the ways harry and draco hold each other at a distance and you end up with these stunning moments of clarity where they’re truly seeing each other for the first time. and suddenly everything makes sense. i won't spoil it here but there’s a scene towards the end where harry is talking to hermione and ron about realizing the first time he felt what its like to be loved and I fucking SOBBED. an all-time fave fic about learning how to belong.

Had To Be You by @lettersbyelise​​ - 59k - E a genuinely excellent slow burn about absolute fucking morons who refuse to express their mutual love over the course of literal years?? HOW MANY TENDER MEET-CUTES DO 2 GAY IDIOTS EVEN NEED. a car ride a bookshop a street corner -- when harry met sally is my enemy. but you know what? this fic is masterfully written, it’s an epic tale of unexpected friendships and the inability to say the things we feel. also its very much also a soft boi fic if not for the Major Fuck Up that pushes it into drama territory for me. so worth the turmoil tbh.

Hurricane by phrynne - 120k - E auror partners terrified of love. it’s a fic about walls - where the emotional landscape of this fic is occluded by dishonest words so you feel the tension play out in hollow voices, shuttered looks, emptied eyes. it’s like watching two ppl get flayed alive in slow motion and everything is SHIT for a little. it’s mean, it’s ugly, it doesn’t let you give the characters an out when they’re being cruel - to each other and to themselves. but harry and draco are two violent forces hurling toward each other’s walls and the inevitable reckoning comes and it’s so very worth the ending. the hospital bed scene to rule all hospital bed scenes.

Returning Tides by @zigster-ao3​ - E  “Is my timing that flawed? Our respect run so dry? Yet there's still this appeal That we've kept through our lives” --those fuCKing ian curtis lyrics in the summary!! p a i n. why do i put myself through getting-back-together fics knowing full well i’m gonna be Sad As Hell during the not-together portion of the story?? we are all unfortunately hoes for heartache. anyway this fic is beautiful. draco’s a dad and recently widowed, harry has a thestral reserve, the settings here are stunning. a story about grief and love that lingers.

A Piercing Comfort by @talithan - 44k - T “There is no objective scorecard. There isn’t anything that a person does that tips the balance from ‘deserving’ to ‘undeserving’, or vice versa. A ‘deserving’ person will not run out of worthiness after a set time of happiness and have to then go about working to deserve it again. And an ‘undeserving’ person does not have to suffer at length before having the opportunity to be ‘deserving’.” -- the heart of this fic. harry’s in therapy, facing depression, and learning how to accept love he doesn’t think he deserves. (also draco is harry’s therapist but yes, that power dynamic is handled ethically-well imo and addressed in the author notes I promise!!).

Borrowing Courage by @xx-thedarklord-xx​ - 70k - E |After years of being a Magical Artist and painting for other people, Draco decides it’s time to paint for himself for once. The secrets pile up as he tries to unravel the mystery of his relatives but the only thing he didn’t count on was having to go to Potter of all people for approval.| --god i love this fic. the thing about drarry here is that they never mean to hurt each other but they do. they do and draco’s trying to do the right thing and he wants so badly for good family but harry’s never rly stopped grieving sirius and it’s this whole unintended mess of festering wounds forced to heal. everyone needs a hug. also ron/blaise pairing and ron+draco’s friendship here is everything!!

Reparations and the sequel, Foundations by Saras_Girl - 320k - E | Harry is about to discover that the steepest learning curve comes after Healer training, and that second chances can be found in unexpected places.| -- incredible. harry and draco’s dynamic as healers, the cast of original characters, the boys learning what it means to trust each other, draco building a rehabilitation center, harry falling in love with him, and “meus fabula est mei ut dico: my story is mine to tell.”  i cry

The Ties that Bind by phoenix_writing (not on ao3) - 61k - T | Upon Andromeda’s death, Harry and Draco are given custody of Teddy. Their lives will never be the same.| -- harry’s got major abandonment issues and he’s just trying to be a good co-parent with draco but everyone is being the woRST and you want to murder them on behalf of harry. but then, the boys learn to listen to each other and god it all becomes so tender. also harry has a gay panic. things are awful but it all works out. -

[part 1: thrillers | part 2: dramas | part 3: soft bois | part 4: wankbanks]

Tbh if you actually like answering early fandom questions I have like a million (btw it’s me again from the last 2)

You mentioned before that you were kind of out of the fandom by Danger Days but do you remember what the reaction was when Gerard talked about drinking again?

Did many og fans stick around or did they really turn on the band? Like I know you said bullets ppl hated revenge but did it grow on them eventually?

What did ppl think when Gerard and Lynz married???? That one I really want to know bc when I was newer in the fandom everyone kissed her ass like crazy and it seems like ppl have only recently realized she and msi aren’t the greatest.

Ok! Hey!!!! I kind of love you for all of these btw. this is gonna be LONG. SO yes, I was totally out of fandom at that point. However, I do follow a few blogs and I remember when the article was posted where he talked about his struggle with an ED and starting to drink again during DD. Personally, I was kind of. In shock? I didn't realize how much he was struggling at the end of it tbh. I think it also took a lot of older fans out a little bit too. It kind of made him a tangible human being rather than this formative icon we idolized. Saying that sounds awful. But at the beginning, because there was no social media, we had NO idea what the guys were actually like irl. They were human, obviously, but they were people we had put on a pedestal and we could project onto them, y'know? We had interviews and such, but the first glimpse we got into ~the real them~ was LOTMS, which was a highly edited version of the truth that fell into the stereotypes we kind of built. It glossed over Gerards addiction pretty rapidly. Reading his struggle at the end of MCR and DD broke my heart. This band did SO much for me, and a lot of us, but we never took into account how much it was taking from them or Gerard. That's all I can really say about it? Like I said, I wasn't in the fandom. So this was mostly my perspective. No one turned on the band. I think we just kind of grew up and started experiencing new things. Our interests change and merge as we get older. Some things I got from being an MCR fan stuck with me forever - i.e, my love of horror films and graphic novels, as well as my forever love of the guys. But the music wasn't what I needed anymore, yknow? I have diagnosed avoidant personality disorder, and severe depression as a result. My Chem helped me feel seen when I felt totally fucking invisible. It helped me form lasting friendships. I'm still friends with people I met in line to their shows in 2005, and on myspace. As I turned 19-20, my sadness started feeling more melancholy rather than anger. I listened to a lot of The National around then, and started getting seriously invested in film as a way of escapism. In regards to people hating revenge - I think a lot of people either left or stuck around for good. You can go back on old lj entries on the chemicalromance comm and read peoples reaction to Revenge songs. They hated how manufactured it sounded, hated how clean Gerards vocals were, HATED I'm Not Ok - thought it was too commercial for what they were prior. As someone who got into the via Revenge, it actually took some time to get used to the sound of Bullets! ALRIGHT. Ok. GERARD MARRYING LINDSEY. I wish I could figure out how to add a cut to tumblr now but IDK OK.  SOOO. Some background that y’all know but is needed for context. Gerard was in a LONG TERM relationship for YEARS with someone named Kat. No one has ever EVER seen her. Gerard only talked about having a girlfriend, thanked her in notes, and she is mentioned by some reporters sometimes (as goth looking). They break up. Gerard is ~technically~ single for like. a fuckin MONTH. then Eliza shit starts up (even tho she was alluding to being with him for fukin EVER). She fakes a pregnancy, they get engaged (around I Don’t Love You), shit was WILD. like BALLS TO THE WALL INSANE. I can go way way way more into this if y’all are interested just lemme know. THEY BREAK UP around the beginning of Pro Rev. Ok. OK. Within like. another fukin MONTH Gerard is seen MAKING OUT WITH LYNZ FROM FUCKIN MSI. They go to each others shows, seen holding hands ETC ETC. LIKE. THIS DUDE. This dude who had a LONG TERM GIRLFRIEND WE NEVER EVER SAW suddenly has had TWO PUBLIC RELATIONSHIPS IN THE SPAN OF NOT EVEN A YEAR.  also btw. We ALL thought he was gay, no fukin joke. Like I was saying earlier about not having any social media. We had an idea of what the guys were like from their stage personas and LOTMS. And like. Gerards Stage Persona is Loud. We thought Eliza mightve been a beard? Idk it was a weird time tbh.  BUT THEN THEN T H E N G AND L GET MARRIED????>>????? THEY HAD BEEN DATING A M ON TH. a MONTH. and they got fuckin MARRIED. The conspiracy theories, y’all, I can’t. IT WAS INSANE.  SO DUDE GETS ENGAGED TO SOMEONE, BREAKS UP, MAKES OUT WITH BASS PLAYER FROM MSI AND GETS MARRIED TO HER. ALL WITHIN T H R E E MONTHS.  goddamn.  So, ok. Last bit. Unfortunately the attitude towards language and WAS different back then. I know a lot of younger fans shit on older fans for saying so, but it WAS. It was totally different. MSI were seen as ~too cool, and their fans were pissed they went on tour with My Chem, etc. I wasn’t a fan, but I had seen them live a few times with a friend who was (not on Pro Rev). They just weren’t my thing and I hated Urines face. My friend who was actually a huge fan of BOTH msi and my chem separately was SHOCKED that G and Lindsey got together because their band and their vibes were so different. People mostly thought Lindsey was hot at the time but didn’t know anything about her, cuz again, no social media. Like, I cannot stress enough how much about these people we did not know. No one cared about their social lives or what they were like irl so we DIDN’T know how gross Urine and crew were. Like. A Huge factor as to why people were pissed and mad at Eliza was because she was making something Gerard obviously wanted to keep private into a public thing for attention and clout. Also, when he was being SO public with Lindsey it was shocking. Anyway I h8 msi. 

ANIMAL THOUGHTS OVER COFFEE BABY

I just had an interesting? discussion w my oldest bro. for context he has two little kids, no pets, and is the only one of my siblings who's apathetic toward animals (the rest of us are biiig pet ppl). this comes up in conversation a lot cuz he's kinda fascinated by my All Animals All The Time lifestyle.

I was telling him my work situation's about to change, and he goes "oh you should make goose internet famous, that should be your income" and I immediately shoot that down hell no hell no. we agreed that an influencer lifestyle is fucked up, but had totally different ideas about how this applies to PET influencers. this turned into a discussion of anthropomorphizing.

(for the record, I don't always have a moral dilemma with pet influencers. animal exploitation is entirely different from human exploitation--it exists, of fucking course it does, but posting your cat/dog doing cute stuff with a silly voiceover is not exploitation lol. they have no concept of viewership.)

HE believes that inappropriate anthropomorphizing is when ppl are WAY too into their pets. he thinks it's annoying. things like referring to yourself as your dog's mom, or always wanting to be with your pet. I was like...struggling to explain that it's not that straightforward. so like idk I've been thinking about it ever since we talked.

it's when a person assumes their animal has any sort of human motivation or understanding (animals don't seek revenge, they are limited in how they connect action with punishment, etc). by NOT anthropomorphizing your pet, you demonstrate an important level of respect because that's YOU, the human (aka the member of the pet-owner relationship who holds all the cards and is vastly more intelligent) making an effort to learn the animal's language, in a sense. you're meeting them halfway.

so like me saying I'm my pets' mom isn't me going "they are literally my babies and take priority over everything else in my life and I'm going to treat them like human babies," as my bro was suggesting, because he's got kids and that's his only context. it's me saying "this animal depends on me for everything and is a younger less developed creature. we love each other deeply. the best label I can give our relationship to reflect the significance it holds for THEM is parent and child." I give myself that label out of respect for their perspective.

but I wanted to know what other ppl think...? it's a really interesting discussion. especially since I see the full spectrum of owner-types through work, from "my dog lives in the yard and I feed him" to "I cannot be separated from my 4 pound yorkie whose feet never touch the ground or else I will Die" like. non-animal folks just do not realize the range, the complexity of relationships.

do y'all brand yourself a parent to your pets? why or why not?

fic writer review

tagged by @chitsangenthusiast thank u kath <33

1. how many works do you have on ao3?

23! which is. so crazy to me?? no way i’ve written that many stories lmao

2. what’s your total ao3 word count?

144,536 (also like half of that is from this past year alone LMAO??)

3. how many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

only 3: atla, daughter of smoke and bone, and leviathan. and since 2015 ive only written for atla lol

4. what are your top 5 fics by kudos?

fumbling towards ecstasy

love language

sunday morning

the kind of love (i’ve been dreaming of)

before the storm

5. do you respond to comments, why or why not?

i try to!! i’ve def been slacking recently, and i generally only respond to comments on a new fic for a certain amt of time after it’s been posted. but i like to do it bc i LOVE when fic authors respond to my comments, so i just want to return the favour to other ppl who might feel the same way! :)

6. what’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

LMAO i was about to say none and then i remembered as we fade in the dark, which i wrote years and years ago so i just forgot it existed hfhsjs

7. do you write crossovers? if so, what’s the craziest one you’ve written?

nah, not a fan of em

8. have you ever received hate on a fic?

omg YES i got THE funniest comment on victory lap where this person was just SO MAD that sokka was a dick to zuko abt figure skating, calling him toxic and shit akwhdjwhs like i swear they just completely missed the entire point of the fic it was so funny

9. do you write smut? if so, what kind?

FUCK yeah i do baby. idk if i would say i specifically write a certain kind of smut but i am very fond of writing established relationship sex where they’re just very comfortable w each other and already know each other really well. which is funny bc my most popular fic is a first time sex fic but oh well ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

10. have you ever had a fic stolen?

as far as im aware no

11. have you ever had a fic translated?

nope! i did have fumbling towards ecstasy podficced tho if that’s anything?

12. have you ever co-written a fic before?

yes, once, and tbh i don’t think i’d ever do it again djhsjshs it’s just not rlly my jam

13. what’s your all-time fave ship?

i rlly don’t think it’s that hard to guess LMAO

14. what’s a fic you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

ughh i hesitate to say lover come back bc i am still dead set on finishing it one day but i just haven’t made any real progress on it in so long and just arrfgghhdh it haunts me. i have so much of it written already and i don’t want it all to just go to waste :(

15. what are your writing strengths?

i’d say…dialogue and having my writing feel very physically grounded in the moment. personally, i don’t like to spend a lot of time in that sort of abstract, reflective headspace—i prefer to focus on specific, concrete moments and interactions. i try to bring attention to the sensory side of things to make it feel more tangible

16. what are your writing weaknesses?

both over- and under-editing lol. sometimes i’ll rework a line or passage too much when it was much better off the way i’d originally written it. and sometimes i’m so intent on just getting things done and posting that i don’t spend much time editing at all

17. what are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages on a fic?

personally i would never do it myself, and i’m not a huuge fan of it in other fics either. there is one rlly old makorra fic that i love tho that does it and i think it works incredibly well in the specific context that it’s in

18. what was the first fandom you ever wrote for?

leviathan! those books were my first introduction into any kind of fandom stuff, they still hold a special place in my heart

19. what is your favorite fic ever written?

my favourite fic that I’VE ever written is probably victory lap, closely followed by love language. i’m still incredibly proud of both of them, but victory lap wins out in that it was such a huge, daunting project that i never expected to actually complete—and then i smashed out 26k words of the most self-indulgent au i’ve ever written in a little over two weeks and i was like. holy fucking shit. i can’t believe i did that JFHSJSH

also i’m very happy with the way i managed to execute all the stuff about sokka’s feelings and motivations and the struggles of being an athlete. it was just such a fun and fulfilling way to combine two of my biggest interests ^_^

now if we’re talking abt my favourite fic that someone else has written….shit. pls don’t ask me that, i can’t choose >_< i have a favourites tag in my bookmarks for a reason

tagging: @dameferre @goldrushzukka @ofherlionheart @foyal @lesbianvampireboyfriend @quenchyest @zukkababey @badgerfrogzukka

SCK / Edser Asks - mostly 31

(Asks under the cut, there are some spoilers and speculation in there so tread carefully if you don’t want to read that)

Anonymous said: Based on the photos of epi 31 that were released, I saw a theory online that said maybe Deniz bought Eda a star (picture she's holding a certificate paper). Gosh I hope not. That's an Eda and Serkan thing.

It seems to me that buying a star is so specific to Serkan and Eda it either can't be it, OR if is it then they (Eda and Deniz) are doing it to purposely troll Serkan and push at his jealousy buttons, since even if he doesn't remember it, he knows he bought her a star.  I can't imagine Deniz sincerely buying her a star and surprising her with it, because there is no way that goes over well with her, but who knows. I'm done pretending I know the limits of what this show will do, lmao.

Anonymous said: A lot of fans think that Deniz is proposing to Eda but that's one huge box for a ring! I feel like maybe he's been keeping things that are from their friendship over the years and is gifting her that. But I hope not, because I like to think of Serkan being the sentimental one over things related to Eda. Thoughts?

This scene may have to do with Deniz letting Eda know his real feelings, maybe, but why would he propose so soon, in public when they're already fake engaged, and when he knows Eda is still in love with Serkan?  And you're right, it's way too big for that, perhaps it's something from their childhood? idk. I'm having trouble working up any interest in what Deniz might put in a box, because zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.  He's boring.

Anonymous said: Although I have no context for the situation that leads to Serkan asking if Eda is happy in the next episode, I still need her to answer honestly. Now that they both have calmed down, had time to adjust to the current situation and he is clearly interested in getting to know her, she needs to tell him exactly how she feels about everything. Heck, totally okay with a comment that “she would have fought for him and their relationship if he had ever given her a chance.” He remembers their kiss, he is having flashes of her and wants to spend time with her, her expressing interest & opening up has to hit differently this time. And if he still says he is going to be with Selin then I do not even what the point of this storyline was 🤷🏻���♀️.

Yeah, I'm pretty in line with you on this. I would love it if Eda was completely, emotionally honest with him in a moment like that. But my fear is that Eda's pride, understandably wounded by his engagement to the psycho, will get in the way. Our girl doesn't like to appear vulnerable, we've seen it too many times. And being honest about their feelings is NOT how they fell in love the first time around, is it? Nope they were both too terrified to admit it, until push came to shove. 

As far as the point of the storyline, its to show us that Serkan will fall in love with Eda even when the circumstances are completely stacked against them. To that end they have STACKED everything they could against them. So I think the only thing we can do is have patience. There’s no doubt what the endgame plan is, in show time it’s only been a few days, we need to give Serkan a minute to let the war between his heart and brain play out.  I think this episode is going to show us a Serkan who is drawn to her and SHOOK by her. And Selin seeing all of that.

Anonymous said: yeah, i think the amnesia plotline is especially hard to watch rn because of selin's presence and her and serkan's "relationship" and that's where most of the frustration around current eps stem from. altho, i have seen ppl get mad that he's not remembering from "key moments" in their story and somehow it ruins a part of their story and idk.. i just disagree bc clearly there's a plan there for what triggers his memory and when it happens.. and i feel like something has to be coming soon there

Oh, yes, I completely disagree with anyone who thinks that he needs to be remembering moments to prove his love. What bullshit. HE HAS A BRAIN INJURY. It’s AMNESIA. It’s not a choice. It’s not a diss on their love. I’ve noticee that there are legions of fans out there who don’t get the, “If I lived 100 lives, I’d fall in love with you 100 times,” and keep thinking that him recovering his memories is going to be the silver bullet that fixes thing. I don’t think so. I do think he’ll get them back eventually, but seems to me he’s going to need to fall in love first.  Which hopefully will become more fun to watch, because that’s pretty damn powerful. 

Anonymous said: I was just thinking, it kinda sucks we never got to see what Serkan's other two wishes were. Obviously that's all gone and forgotten and the way the story is going now, Serkan may have to offer Eda 3 wishes for hurting her after the memory loss. It would be interesting to see how that would go (it could be for humor purpose or could actually be meaningful for their relationship). Your thoughts?

Oh, yes, I wish we could have seen what the rest of the wishes were. It was a really fun construct that they didn’t play out. Probably a victim of the change in writers around that time.  Since none of the wishes could violate the contract, I really don’t know what Serkan was going to ask for. I think when all of this is said and done, Serkan’s going to have to grant more than 3 wishes for Eda...

Anonymous said: Think I will take my lead from you and stay positive about SCK. And I am going to believe the next episodes is full of great moments between Eda & Serkan that are actual steps back towards each other. Totally get that it has only been 3 days in the show but the weakest part for me has been how tightly Serkan is holding onto his relationship/engagement to Selin...yikes! It makes me cringe seeing his arm around her. I get that was his defense mechanism but it left Eda heartbroken with nothing to work with. Now he has softened, acknowledged her talent and his interest in her and after realizing he is totally jealous about her being with someone else then he needs to put an end to his engagement with Selin.

Oh yes, CRINGE CITY. I can barely look at her. Ugh. The arm around the waist is the worst! But I think you’re right, it’s his defense mechanism. He’s using it to keep distance with Eda who scares the CRAP out of him. Poor dummy. 

Anonymous said: “the barnacle on the ass of this show” 😂😂😂😂 Thank you, I needed that laugh, and never has Selin been better described. Those spoilers I’m reading better not be right 😤

Okay, I'm loath to get into spoilers, but are you talking about the Selin fake pregnancy rumors? I think those are more speculation than spoilers (however the last two weeks the end of the ep hasn't been in the spoiler drops, but then leaked out as prevalent rumors, so.... maybe happening again?)

Anyway @echoapothecary and I talked this through with the spoilers yesterday and I think this rumor does work with the spoilers and it might not be so bad if it happens the way we speculated. Of course all of this is predicated on these spoilers being correct, and who the eFF knows. Spoilers:

The end of the episode is not in the fragman

The end is a bomb

The final scene is bad but it will come in handy because it will serve to unmask Selin (the start of her downfall)

So with those spoilers... I do think the cliffhanger bomb could be Selin telling Eda she's pregnant. But notice that key point... telling Eda.  

Selin is going to be freaked out after seeing Serkan's interest in Eda grow all episode, and she’s supposedly going to witness something that happens between Edser on the boat. So by the end of the episode she probably feels him slipping away and will be beyond desperate. So I could see her dropping one big bomb, a hail Mary pass, that she thinks might drive Eda away and even out of town.

So if she did that would definitely be a “bomb” and it would also be “bad” from the audience perspective.  Now to it “coming in handy because it will serve to unmask her.” I’m pretty sure she and Serkan have not had sex since the accident. The show went out of their way three times to show us they aren’t sleeping in the same bed. So once Serkan finds out what Selin said, he’s going to instantly realize she told one whopper of a manipulative lie to Eda.  And if that happens it suddenly calls into question every single thing she’s told him since he called her after the accident. Hence, unmasking begins. 

So if that happens, and Selin tries to manipulate Eda into giving up, I could see Eda deciding to leave town. Selin might even tell her Serkan doesn’t know because its too much right now on top of the amnesia, so it’s up to Eda to step back and so Eda won’t mention it to him and expose her lie. Who knows. If it happens I expect it would be resolved in 32 after some angst and some dramatic Serkan and Eda moments (imagine him going after her if she’s trying to leave and he finds out why from someone like Melo or Deniz). 

Anyway, is this what’s going to happen? WTF knows. Speculation is never correct, it could be anything, but it seems right in line with the melodramatics this show has been going for since the plane crash.  Selin is rumored to be leaving soon, so if this is how we get rid of her soon, fine by me. I just want her off this show BY ANY MEANS NECESSARY.  

What's your thoughts on when the plate falls and Cloud went to go help Tifa?

My thoughts or my analysis? Cause you’re getting the latter anyway lol I love doing action analysis, there’s so much happening and getting the chance to slow it down is great for getting a fuller picture.

Ok, spoiler warning for ppl who haven’t played – do I still need to do this? Eh ok, (I tag FF7R spoilers as final fantasy 7 remake spoilers) and it’s gonna be long.

Also, this is one person’s interpretation of the scene, so if you disagree that’s cool and we’ll agree to disagree.

You’re also gonna have to excuse the janky quality on some of the screens, I’m grabbing them from Youtube and it’s frustrating af trying to get the exact moment I want.

Other analyses if anyone’s interested.

Shinra HQ vision scene (Cloti/plot analysis) 

Chapter 3 (Cloti reblog) 

Tifa character analysis 

Aerith Resolution (plot analysis/theory – I should probably update this since I’ve had other ideas since then) 

Train graveyard (not really an analysis, but I got some sweet screenshots of Cloti) 

Clotiscrew tunnel analysis 

Cloti reunion analysis 

The Promise Analysis 

Andrea’s approval (Cloti ask response) 

Leslie analysis (not mine, but a good read) 

Cloti action touching 

Aerti friendship analysis 

Cloti body language chapter 3 

Cloti healthy disagreement 

Cloti post heliboss battle (chapter 15) 

Clerith playground scene 

Now, strap in and enjoy the ride.

Recap time!

This is a 6m scene I'm going over, so I'm gonna skip anything not directly relevant or I'll be here all night lol

So despite our brave heroes best efforts the plate is coming down. We get a power slide from Rude, a call from Tseng (who times it so perfectly was he watching?) and some cloti.

First thing we see if Tifa looking distraught. She has no idea how to stop the plate from coming apart and from the way she's looking at this consol wouldn't know what to do even if she could work the computer. They were so close to winning and now defeat is about to stomp all over them and kill everyone she loves. Tifa is someone whose driven by the desire for those she loves to be safe no matter what. This is a crushing moment for her.

Murderous Cloud is murderous (and kinda hot). I mean, we know he's got very little reservations about killing people in cold blood because he's SOLDIER!Cloud when it comes to a fight, but I do like the deadly intent we see on his face at different points in the game. He looked at Johnny a bit like this back in chapter 3 and now he's looking at Reno the same way. He means business.

And then he doesn't because Tifa's in trouble and we all know Real!Cloud prioritises Tifa's safety above everything else. That's not me saying he's no longer SOLDIER!Cloud, but the difference between the last screen and this is that he was fully in that badass merc mode about to kill Reno because it's what badass mercs do, whereas this is Real!Cloud urging him to refocus all that skill he's got into protective ability and go save the woman he loves.

I get some people might not see the distinction between the two personas, but it's actually really easy when you break it down. If it's about Tifa then Real!Cloud is gonna push for dominant action to keep her safe. If it's any other situation then he's just gonna let SOLDIER!Cloud do what he needs to. Sometimes it's a more conscious battle between the two and sometimes they co-operate. That's how a fractured psyche works within the context of Cloud's character. Don't believe me? You see both of them on screen at the start of chapter 8 in the church. Real!Cloud is the one saying “You okay, buddy?”

How many times can you count that we get an 1st person pov with Cloud in the whole game? Like literally looking through his eyes? Because this is 1st person pov. We are Cloud at this moment in time and he's rushing Rude, but still takes a glance at Tifa. I don't think this happens at any other point. This game is a 3rd person game. We're over everyone's shoulder. We don't get in their head to see through their eyes. This is deliberate framing. We obviously can't see his face or his reaction, but the fact we're seeing this moment as Cloud and he's chosen to look at Tifa is a big thing.

So Rude's pushed the button and Barret's yelling. Cloud actually looks more halfhearted in this swing than I expected. It's like Barret's fury just isn't enough to get his blood boiling lol

He's about to go after him anyway, when Tifa's voice stops him dead. I can't think of a moment in the game where someone else calling for him to stop actually makes him stop.

AH! Honestly this is such a move! Romantic hero hello! I know it's a classic move from Cloud – which is kindly weirdly implemented since we first saw it after OG, but it's been retconned as one of his signature moves with Tifa and only Tifa.

Also! EYE CONTACT! I'm gonna scream about Cloti eye contact until my own eyes cross lol they do eye contact so damn well! The only other person who got Cloud to look him in the eye was Andrea Rhodea lol Everyone else it's either confrontational eye contact or total avoidance. Cloud and Tifa have good eye contact. This highlights how much they trust each other. Even though Real!Cloud is afraid of letting Tifa know how weak he really is, he's ok with her looking him in the eye. He wants her to see the real him.

Now, I know some people go on about Tifa's chapter 3 comment of “Cloud, you're scaring me/your eyes didn't used to look so” as a negative thing. I've already explained why this is fucking bullshit, and I'd like to add that if Tifa wasn't comfortable with him in combat situations or otherwise she wouldn't make eye contact with him. Eye contact is fucking terrifying! You're able to see so much. These two aren't afraid to look in each other's eyes, even with their “I don't think he/she likes me” misunderstandings.

And just to cap it. They both smile to reassure each other they're ok.

Ok, so Reno and Rude are making their exit. Barret tries the FF7 boomer version of turning a computer off and on again by shooting it. Then Tseng proves he's either psychic, a stalker or just dramatic af by appearing on screen at just the right point to answer Tifa's question.

And look at her face! Whoever said she's a heartless bitch can stfu forever! This is the face of a woman who is broken by what's about to happen! She's lived in that slum for five years. She probably knows every local by name, and takes time to actually get to know them too. She cares. So much. She doesn't want anyone hurt. She's pleading for their lives. Pleading with her enemy. Who literally smirked when he said “there's nothing you can do now”. Tseng has no conscience.

Just adding this to be a butt. This is Cloud's reaction to Aerith when he sees her....what reaction? Yeah...

Then he asks where she is in his SOLDIER!Cloud way.

So Aerith gets dragged away and explosions start happening. A siren goes off. Barret and Cloud turn away from the computer. Tifa turns and says, “No no no no no” and Cloud immediately turns back. His eyes widen and he looks a bit lost for a moment. There's nothing he can do for her and he's not got the first clue anyhow, and there's no time. It's hitting him just how much she cares. I mean, he knew, but he didn't know, you know?

Notice the awkward hand there? Yeah, that's an “I don't know how to comfort you, what do I do?” hand gesture. Cloud's literally never seen Tifa like this. She's always trying her best to remain optimistic. She fights hard to protect what she loves. She doesn't fall to her knees defeated.

I'm actually loving all the extra insight all these analyses are giving me into just how reserved, how introverted, how determined Tifa is. She's had a hard fucking life. Born in a dust bowl, lost all her friends to the big city, saw her father murdered, almost died, her town got burnt to the ground but she still somehow managed to pick herself up and build a new life. She did that on her own. Nobody got her to Midgar. When she arrived she was lucky Marle took care of her. She could've been left alone with no support system. She got in with Avalanche and built a new family – even though they don't always see eye to eye on method, she also believes in their goal to stop Shinra and save the planet. She's principled and brave, focused af. But she's not unbeatable. Stuff gets her down. She tries her best to be cheerful, but doesn't always succeed. She keeps her problems to herself. But this? This is too big. This has broken her. She can't stay up and Cloud doesn't know how to help. Not emotionally, anyway.

OMG HE OFFERED HIS HAND!! I didn't see that before!! (Check the spot where his name is, his hand is between Tifa’s hair and arm, palm open.) I knew he grabbed her by the arm and hauled her up when she didn't move, but he's actually holding his hand out for her before that!! She's too in her head to do anything, though, and I don't think Cloud really understands that. Any devastating feelings he had about personal tragedy he's locked away because they literally broke him. It must be distressing on some level for him to see his own emotions mirrored in Tifa. I said before the urge to comfort her starts at the beginning of chapter 13, but maybe the first spark of that is this moment here, when he can't do a thing for her, except pull her along behind him and hope he can keep her alive.

There's some really nice still shots in this game and this is one of them. I don't really have anything to say about it. I mean, we knew Cloud had both hands on Tifa's shoulders so he could direct her where to go and she's not really with it until the moment the debris falls in front of her and shocks her out of her stupor. Cloud's focused on the job at hand, no time to worry about anything but the next obstacle. By keeping both hands on Tifa's shoulders he's ensured he doesn't have to keep checking on her to make sure she's with him. He's basically piloting her because she's not capable of decision making for the moment.

Someone tell me, do action backhugs count? That's non-optional embracing right there. How many of you have seen this exact moment? Because I have literally been replaying the same 4s clip to get the screen for this bit and this is the first time in about 10 replays that I stopped it here. This is the between 1 second frames when the debris falls.

I mean, this is what a bodyguard actually looks like. Cloud's focus is all on keeping Tifa safe. He pulls her close to him, offers strength while she's feeling weak. He is literally using himself as a shield for her. They're such a balanced couple. When one is weak the other is strong for them, and whatever flaws they have they accept. They really are just a great couple!

Probably the worst screen I've ever grabbed lol

I was trying to figure out the moment he took her hand but I can't quite stop on it and it's just a touch too much out of frame. Instead, I got this. EYE CONTACT. I don't need to explain it again, right? We get the whole Cloud/Tifa eye contact deal by now.

Although, at the same time, that's a fucking scary shot of Cloud lol reminds me of that meme with Rinoa and Squall where she says he's the best looking guy there and it's all pixellated lol

Ah! I remembered why I was trying to get their hands, to see if Tifa grabbed his first or he took hers. But I could see through the playback that he took her hand. He initiated contact.

Yknow, I know people often compare the whole one half is always the summoner or mage and the other half is the warrior, but this screen right here looks a lot like another FF couple.

Tidus and Yuna.

I mean...do I have to say more?

Cloud looks behind to check Tifa's ok – I mean she's not but you get the point. Still getting Tidus and Yuna vibes from this moment tbf. This is the exact same type of sequence they had of them in FFX-2 when Yuna's dreaming Lenne's past and she and Tidus replace Lenne and Shuyin. They're running down a corridor and Tidus looks back at her. I mean, seeing how this type of comparison is usually only reserved for the whole mage/warrior pairing, it's strange that their body language here mirrors Square’s first fully voice acted installment. At the time the graphics were cutting edge and the cut scenes are still lauded as some of the most beautiful storytelling. Strange that Tifa and Cloud could have this comparison to Tidus and Yuna, especially with the whole Suteki da ne always being used to prop up a certain ship.

Anyway, Cloud’s checking on Tifa cause he’s totally not in love with her and wants to make sure she’s safe. You get the idea lol

I'd like to point out that Cloud doesn't – despite popular opinion – have hold of Tifa's jubblies. His arm is under them, wrapped around her ribs, which is actually a very secure hold for him since he's trying to hang onto Barret and keep hold of Tifa too. You'll notice she's not exactly paying attention to her own safety – which makes sense since Cloud literally had to haul her up when she wouldn't move. She's not in a good headspace during the end of this scene, so he's being very protective towards her.

Conclusion

Another great piece of action! I mean, does it really matter if these two are in the trenches or just hanging out? They have a synchronicity that's impossible to deny. They balance each other in pretty much every single way there is for a couple of be two halves of a whole. The FF10 comparison is a new one on me, especially since I don't look at two titles and try to see what about each one is like the other. They're both different and unique with their own charm. But, the second I caught that screen of Cloud pulling Tifa along I was immediately hit by the thought of “That's what Tidus and Yuna do”, so I couldn't not mention it.

We get a clear look at how devastated Tifa is immediately after the realisation hits that sector 7 is about to get crushed. She's just gone. Checked out. If Cloud hadn't stepped up to save her she'd have died. She wouldn't have got herself over to Barret in time and he would've died going to get her and get them back to the zip line. This is why it's so important that Cloud picks up the slack. He was strong when she needed him to be. She's strong for him later when he becomes weak. They really are two halves of one whole. 

I love that Tifa gets her own character development. She’s not just “the love interest”. Barret is basically a supporting character here, but we know he’ll get his turn in Corel and he does get his own moments to shine in Midgar, but this is cloti, so sorry dude, next time.

Info dumbo about the StarFinite story?

aright u asked for it anon GET READY [cracks knuckles] this is gonna be long so obligatory cut in 3, 2........

...1!

so the uh, the au! the story!! w/e yall wanna call it! full disclaimer, i only began working on this whole thing a while ago, but it's totally taken over my fukn brain. like, we're talking big hyperfixation hrs. am i cringe for being this invested in my own content? yes? cool i do not Care >:3€

i should also throw it out there real quick that i am kin w/ infinite, n this is actually one of my two canons (both of which are my own aus lmfao wow). i didn't go into it expecting it to be but sfsfsgdfs here we are ig!! for that reason it's got extra importance to me n this definitely contributes to the euphoria i get from it!! it's a lil odd writing ur own canon,,? but i kinda just go w/ the flow!

the au n, the story that i will start Eventually, revolves around infinite n starline (obvi) n it's honestly just ... the tl;dr is big healing momence n, what's this? uh oh sisters !!! they are falling in love 😳😳😳

uhhhh so infinite is an android, made by eggman. that's like, the most notable canon divergence here! super important context to have. i've got a whole big theory on the possibility of sega originally intending infinite to be an artificial being (which i explored in the works for my Other canon too), stemming from not only the scene in forces wherein infinite comments on sonic's "data", but a line of dialogue from tails in one of the last stages of the game where he Literally Says "so this is where eggman built infinite". that ... i mean. that contrasts w/ episode shadow pretty hard don't it?? would explain why that dlc was so rushed, n the comic too. ANYWAY adsfsfs um that's a seperate ramblepost. yeah!!!

they are also agender n use they/them (primarily) as well as he/him!! so i'll be refering to them w/ those pronouns!

after the war, infinite is taken in by the resistance n, instead of being dismantled, they're basically given a chance to rehabilitate themselves. it's agreed that they won't be reprogrammed, as despite the potential risks, it feels wrong to do so; like a violation of their free will, individuality n thinking. if infinite is to be a good person, it's not gonna be bc other ppl recreated their entire personality, it's gonna be bc it's what they themselves truly want. robot ethics idk man!! u can't tell me that sonic n co wouldn't offer this to infinite if they offered it to metal in IDW,,,, i am Standing By This!!!

it's, yknow, a bit rocky, at first. infinite has to really fight the urge to return to eggman (something they already tried once, before the resistance found them; they were cast out). it's a struggle against what they were built to do, against giving into unhealthy familiarity over facing a, while healthier, unfamiliarity. new faces, a new life, turning their back on their mission n creator, it's like, a lot.

they work for/with the sonic crew, rebuilding the world they tore down as deemed fitting justice, being closely monitored for a bit as a natural precaution. as it becomes apparent infinite truly no longer has any ambition to harm others (they don't have much ambition for anything, really), they're then granted more freedom, n start taking on more important missions!! it at least gives them something to do, keeps them occupied. they have issues with dissociation, unreality, whether they're truly a real person bc, well, android. feeling purposeless, n a lack of worth, especially. a need to prove themselves. heavy stuff. i'll kinda go into that a bit more in a sec. their work grounds them, if only temporarily.

n soooooo... IDW comic stuff happens. metal virus time. starline gets kicked out of the empire.

now, as the comics are ongoing, n as this is already an au, there's gonna be divergence, n i must admit i haven't planned out all that yet. there's a lot i have to consider!! infinite being w the resistance/restoration is a big game changer ... tho i Do believe that they were absent, likely on a far out mission during most of the chaos. eggman doesn't know abt them, nor does starline or anyone else other than the sonic crew; n some civilians that recognise them.

i'm not 100% sure of Exactly when it happens, but i think it's just after bad guys, that infinite is sent to locate n bring in starline. it doesn't prove too difficult. there's a whole, starline realising "oh fuck it's you???", some bickering n, the two don't hit it off right away. they're both kinda like. not mentally stable ddgddgdds,,,

so uh. starline ends up essentially going thru the same sorta shit as infinite. careful watch, rebuilding, all that jazz, making sure he can be trusted. he's like... very very lost, quite like infinite is. the world has kinda calmed down, in the meanwhile.

it's at this point i'm gonna go ahead n drop a bit of a ramble i subjected my friends to a while ago, to articulate the way i see the two, n their dynamic together!! i was considering making this it's own post a while ago!

analysing their characters a bit... let's look at starline. Like. so we have this, in bad guys, which SENT ME tbfh;

i feel like it's the moment that triggers starline onto the path he is rn canonically,,, he's clearly like. rly mad n bitter. the core of this?? he wants his work n his efforts to be acknowledged.

he's big angry. still kind of in denial at this stage. he has himself obsessed w/ the idea of making eggman see him as Worthy, that if he just tries hard enough, that'll happen. he's dependent on eggman's validation, n i mean, it's no surprise; he's followed him a Long Time by the sounds of it.

then in the recent issue, hold the fuck up, bc we got, This;

god. my god it's all comin together now homies. this???? this right here??? it is the CLASSIC "i have to do this to prove i'm strong n powerful n smart n worthy n should be respected please Give Me Acknowledgement" ..... n who else is Like That? can u see where im going w/ this?

i think most ppl are aware of infinite's character being extremely indicative of self worth/esteem issues n the need to prove themself, right?? the extreme adversity, repulsion, perhaps even fear toward the idea of being weak. the compulsion to prove otherwise, to show their strength, to become powerful, to conquer to make a point. their theme exudes this same energy as their behaviour in-game; an aggressive attitude, trying to assert themself, while if u rly listen...? the lyrics are actually really sad in places. it reeks of cover up, although composition wise, a v interesting thing to note is a lot of the more telling lyrics are prominent while some of the affirming ones are in the background. indicative of a desire to have their true feelings be heard but caught in a vicious loop?

okay okay that's yet Another different analysis. AHEM.

not to get deep on main (oh who the hell am i kidding that's the point of this entire thing) but i think starline has issues w/ his worth in a similar way to infinite. they both seem to have this need to Prove something, whether it's to others or themselves, n get caught in a toxic spiral of doing worse n worse things for Some kind of validation or acknowledgement. they'll go to really big lengths chasing that, n both of them ultimately sought validation in the wrong place n wrong way.

this is a big part of my starfinite dynamic,, n so, what happens, as they get closer n open up??? we have them BOTH realising together that they don't have to do fuck all to prove anything to anyone. they don't need to do all this to show they're strong n smart n worth something, not to anyone else OR themselves. they're enough as they are. they bond over that shared feeling that they have to do xyz, to prove themselves, n that desire to just finally be acknowledged n appreciated n help each other thru it. to help each other understand that other ppls approval, or lack thereof, doesn't define them, their strength, intelligence, and worthiness.

i feel like they have an interesting parallel between them in like... the above could be taken as a general analysis, but to go more in depth on this au specifically?? ...

starline followed eggman for presumably a long time n it no doubt left him feeling a heavy and deep regret for all that time wasted n spent on an unhealthy path. infinite kinda teaches him that what matters is what he's doing Now n also reminds him that if none of it happened, starline wouldn't have learnt a lot of the serious skills he has. n while starline still feels bad, he also realises himself that, he likely never would have crossed infinite's path if none of it happened. for that reason, he wouldn't take it back.

infinite has only been recently made, on the other hand. they haven't really existed long, yet, but so far their experiences haven't been very positive n it can be .... discouraging. starline sorta, shows infinite their limited experiences w/ the world are a very tiny fraction of what's out there, n things can absolutely change, yes, including for the better; that's the essence of life, a neverending, constant flow of change.

it's a big tale of moving on n letting go, honestly; made easier as they're doing it together. n as they heal n grow, well... these bitches gay. sfshshdgds like, ig that's putting it p bluntly but!! they start to trust each other, understand each other more. as they get to truly know who the other is, they both start developing The Feelings. they're both pretty oblivious n the reveal is totally unknown so far!! yeah, i know, bummer. i suck. boo. adafsfsds however i can say there will be lots of content in the making!! if that soothes the soul! i've got of ideas i hope to bring to life.

ofc there's still a lot of more specific things i haven't covered here so! if y'all want more juice hmu w/ more focused questions but !! this is the overview n i hope it was a decent read now that gave some uhhh! Cool Insight! yea!!! ✌

(Fe3h discourse incoming) So I'm not sure if this is still around but I remember some people calling characters "racist" due to how they initially view the Almyrans and it just annoys me? If you lived in basically medieval times and all you knew about a group of people was that they invaded your homeland and are good fighters it makes sense you'd be wary about them. The fact that we see them easily discard any initial opinions to work with them in VW shows the opposite and how accepting they are

Part of this does probably come from this purity culture sentiment that there is one obvious right answer that should be apparent to anyone not evil when we’re really all to an extent limited by the knowledge we can access. 

This is something I feel strongly about precisely because I know how much I don’t know and how much ppl have been wrong in the past - so much BS is still widely believed these days like Diet culture or counter-evidential beliefs about economy. So that makes me be careful to claim we have the truth now. As my grandfather used to say, “the middle ages will step on us”, that is as long as our time isn’t barbarism free it will come to be considered barbaric times eventually. 

In the middle ages people used to give their children mercury and bankrupt themselves as someone might for real medicine. Emotionally to the mammal brain it’s the same. That’s why knowledge is power cause it helps you know the real consequences of your action. Otherwise you get what seems like caring parents wondering if they're harming their children by not doing barbaric stuff like physical beating or fgm. One can notice by oneself that it’s wrong and causes suffering but someone who only believes their own ideas and never takes outside data into account would be either mad or an arrogant jerk. At some point you need to consider outside data unless you can discover all of science and psychology by yourself. 

So to put it short no one is immune to propaganda and the closest thing to a cure is self-awareness and self-questioning, no one is born with all the answers; instrict, thinking, emotion and intuition can all lead you astray. 

Though the correct word here would be xenophobia. (generic distrust/prejudice about foreigners)

‘Racism’ is a very specific early modernity variant of it with pseudoscience mixed in, or maybe it could be thought of as an ideology meant to keep xenophobic-like distrust going in a mixed society. Normally that sort of prejudice desintegrates as people interact more (a big plot point here actually) - or rather, communication & interaction changes how people define in group and out group, which is ultimately arbitrary. A lot of what is thought of today as countries or races used to be considered wildly different peoples when the reach of communication reached further. 

But if you spread some ideology that leads people to be artificially segregated, or indirectly causes that through economic disadvantages, bam, you can keep prejudice alive & well for centuries and whatever institutions you built on it, like colonial resource extraction gigs or political hegemony. 

That said tho, certain lines there are definitely written to evoke rl xenophobic comments as people commonly experience them, and to tell people who recognize this & might have charged responses because of their own backstories that their lying eyes deceive them because you like those characters is not good.  “Oh but they’re a good person with a bright future” is exactly how this behavior fails to get recognized in real life. So to that extent I’d disagree with you.

At least their past incarnations at the point that they said those lines they were “xenophobes”, that is, fulfilled all criteria of the definition & engaged in typical behavior as people affected by xenophobia experience it. 

Hilda, for all her good qualities (and don’t get me wrong I love her to bits) is still sort of a frivolous rich girl. Sylvain for example did take the time to inform himself ‘bout the neighbors (See that lost item that’s info about sreng) though his family also holds a border territory & much depends on its defense. The system isn’t an universal brainwash, the truth is that both system and individual responses matter and dynamically influence each other.

But note that that’s all I’m talking about: Recognition, sober reasonable acknowledgement of bad behavior. You can’t talk about bad behavior if you don’t show anyone doing it and if it was only irredeemable monsters that did it, it wouldn’t make ppl question themselves. 

To acknowledge that they acted xenophobically (adverb) isn’t to say that they’re an embodiment of all xenophobia ever (noun) and that you’ve got to hate them now. But as long as they don’t hate at you for liking them ppl affected by xenophobia are allowed to vent & use a story as a projection space for it because that’s how everyone uses stories - the same story can in fact mean different things to people without either being “wrong”

Also, scale. Hilda making one or two not even especially malicious comments is on a whole different level than Ingrid actually cheering for destruction. Neither of them compares to the various unrepentant antagonists who never change their views when confronted with evidence cause it benefits them. 

Some of that distinction is lost if you just slap the same label on all and demand they be reacted to the same way, or that ppl add a disclaimer each time they want to talk about a character they like. We don’t make everyone who likes Jeritza say “mass murder is bad” first. 

But also context: After all a big plot here is that the system these characters live in encourages and cultivates such attitudes  - that’s why the various leader figures you can choose to back all want to change it it different ways.

That’s why Winston in 1984 starts the story very paranoid, repressed & full of violent fantasies, to show the effect the dystopia has on people. 

  (important point imho, a lot of ppl look at atrocities and judge that human nature is just bad but actually human nature is programmable. Evil can be engineered as much as civilization and education can foster good)

It’s generally the problem with Purity culture (wether it wears a right or left wing hat) that it’s more focussed on applying loaded, out of context labels (which are then treated as static) than constructive solutions focussed on promoting the desired end goals. 

The labeling tactic is probably appropriate sometimes (active, unrepentant nazis, that you thereby deprive of big dollar platforms or ad revenue) but no tool/tactic is ever a silver bullet. 

tl;Dr I agree with you that labeling/purity culture doesn’t have the right approach to it,  but ppl should be able to call a spade a spade and say & respond to depictions of xenophobia because to say otherwise would be tantamount to saying that victims of xenophobia or racism aren’t allowed to have feelings or engage with media. 

Obsly the characters can’t be reduced to that & you’re right about that & the importance of context, but if just stating/acknowledging that they at one point fulfilled the criteria for xenophobia feels like bashing to you I’d work on decoupling those emotions to see clearer. 

People can have done something wrong at some point & still be interesting people - especially in a media context where they’re as imaginary as their victims, it’s not like you’re giving money to real unrepentant perps. 

I’d ease up on real ppl too if they repent simply because then they stop being a problem and solving it so it stops harming RL ppl takes precedent over cathartic punishment that makes you feel good, the goal should be always to stop the harm (at the root, if possible) because it’s intolerable for ppl to be harmed

Or that’s my 2cents anyways. 

What happened with your roomies if you don’t mind me asking...?

 Yknow what I’m in a mood and they don’t know my tumblr (haha they think I’m a cisstraight girl lol) so let’s get into some shit. Imma put everything under a read more bc imma rant a bit and this is gonna get long.

TW: food, unsanitary (general things not being kept clean, typically bathroom and kitchen related), drug use, fighting, slurs

tl;dr if you dont feel like reading this beast:

They steal what food i dare leave out in the kitchen rather tan keep in my room

They slam doors excessively, fight, yell horrible things to each other, have friends over yelling at like 2 am (last night for example)

Leave the doors unlocked and open?? We cant even lock the front door anymore??? (Dw the doors to our rooms all have locks. If I’m in my room or out of the house, my door is locked)

Constantly throw around the r slur. Like. All the time. Including one person having called me it. Y i k e s

One person keeps smoking in the house even though i’ve asked numerous times (and even have a note on my door) asking people to please smoke outside, it gives me headaches. You are physically hurting me stop.

Don’t Clean Anything. The kitchen is a wreck. The toilets are constantly clogging, I Am In Hell.

For context: the house is a one story house divided into a main floor and finished basement. It’s a rooming house and the basement is largely seperate from upstairs. (They have a kitchen door that they keep closed and locked.) The stairs to the basement are split into two smaller flights, with a landing in between the floors. That’s where the side door is. The public spaces upstairs are the kitchen (connects to stairs), the hallway, and the two bathrooms (big main one, tiny water closet by the front door). The rest of the upstairs is split into five rooms. For comprehension sake, we’ll call my roommates: The Couple (M&F), A, T, and J.

Mmkay lets start with the least egregious and move our way up, shall we? Theft! Of anything and everything! No one can have anything out in the public areas if they actually care about it. It. Will. Get. Stolen. Now, I have a mini fridge and the second biggest room here, so I’m lucky in that 99% of my groceries, as well as all my other belongings, fit in my room. There’s just a wee problem: I don’t have a freezer. Not to fear, past naïve me thought, I’ll just clean out and use the locked freezer since I still have the keys for that fridge! (We have two fridges and food theft was a problem beforehand and so me and my friend who lived here cleaned out the second fridge to use as our own and kept it locked.) I decided to do this after I had bought myself some ice cream, wrote my name on the top, and put it in the main freezer. I go to have some ice cream later that week, I open the tub for the first time (as in I removed the seal holding the lid onto the tub) to find that someone eaten half the tub of ice cream while making it seem like it hadn’t been opened. I know it happened at home bc the spoon marks were clear as day and I have to walk 20 minutes back from the grocery store. That woulda melted by then (Also I would’ve noticed at the store that. The tub was hella lopsided??? And way too light???) So yea of course I’m ticked now, I spent 6 bucks on that bro like just ask or get ur own??? So I put it the other freezer, and for a while it’s fine. Next month I decide to treat myself to some frozen waffles and some chicken strips and come home to find that the hinges holding the locks onto the doors of the fridge were torn out of the fridge/freezer doors. Like. The screws were pried outta this metal door rendering the locks completely useless (to the point i wouldn’t even be able to put the hinges back on.) And the cherry on top?? My ice cream was gone!!! Hope u enjoyed it, asshole. So whatever. Fine. I put my food away and. a week later?? Im like “Man i could go for some waffles rn”. I bought 2 8 packs. One chocolate chip, one cinnamon (y’all i literally buy the cheapest ones Zehrs sells. 2,19$ a box y’all. not even eggos). Surprise surprise!! The entire box of choccy chip ones GONE. Mind u, i wrote my name on all of these boxes, as well as a very large “DO NOT EAT”. so i begrudgingly had a couple (note that, 2) cinnamon waffles and move on. A couple days later I go to have some more and. The waffles are completely gone. Out of a total of 16 waffles, ya boy got a solid 2. (It’s worth noting that there was a single waffle left, but at 0,27$ a waffle, I didn’t mind leaving the box on the table with a note basically reading “these are cheap af, buy ur own bitch”.) (I didn’t swear that much tho)

I’d add the bike to the list but i can’t confirm nor deny that one of my roommates stole my tires and seat off my bike (although M does work on bikes all the time so man idk.)

Next up: wow people here are l o u d. I’m talking slamming doors all the time, slamming things around, yelling, playing music wildly loud. It’s awful. Like. You can just. Close the door quietly? Stop slamming things around please? It��s awful because loud sudden noises make me panic and lemme tell ya, wakin up at eight am bc your a-hole roommate decided to slam the door eight times bc the front door is broken because someone took the border around the jamb off instead of fixing it so we can actually?? lock that door?? because it doesnt quite fit in the jamb and so the only wat to lock it was the chain lock and. someone took that too so thats fun :)))))). The side door isn’t that much better. We have a code lock and. No One Ever Locks It. Like. I’ll come outta room and?? It’s just open????? Close the door???????????

The worst, however, is the fucking fighting. The Couple love to argue all the time. and yell at each other and slam the doors or smashing shit and they yell pretty awful things to each other. Like. I’ve heard M call his gf some awful shit. It’s worse when they have people over too. The other day there were like. 14 cops in here bc of them at like 2 am. Cue me, 2 am, trying to watch a livestream and seeing like??? Six cop cars pull up????? Wh a t????? Not fun not good for my brain.

God and. What is with everyone and the r slur??? Like what?? there are so many words you can choose stop using that word. Like okay the other night someone?? took the dc adapter for the wireless modem and one of the dudes downstairs as well as the couple were looking to see if they had a compatible dc adapter and so i just decided to wait?? and i just spaced out a bit okay whatever i was lookin at the wall like i do and fuckin. the couple had a couple friends over and one of em was chillin between the kitchen and the hall and M yells out from his room “Hey don’t you feel weird with this creepy ass bitch standing next to you? Like what is she, m*ntally r*tarded?” like wow okay dude i’m literally not doing anything. Luckily his friends reaction was basically “?? She lives here?? She can stand there if she wants??” (wow referring to myself as she feels weird and wrong).

A big problem I have is I feel like theres a community in this house that I just don’t fit into? Part of it is I’m like. the only person here who doesn’t do drugs of any kind?? Like I have nothing against ppl who use drugs like whatever bro, but it feels super othering to me when i can’t relate to anyone here because of it. That and. Getting T in particular but really just anyone but A to respect me asking that if you’re going to smoke anything to do it outside because weed and to a lesser extent cigarette smoke trigger my sensory disorder and causes me pain and causes sensory overload and I still find myself asking people to smoke outside.Like I’ve never been unreasonable and said “no drugs in the house” or some bs. I’m just asking u to respect my disability thanks.And like?? I’ll get into this in a second but there were needles in the toilet?? Bro throw them out properly.

And now: Hell.

Can no one clean up after themselves?? Do your dishes. If theres food left on your plate, throw it out first, don’t dump it in the sink. Seriously the kitchen sink is fucked. The kitchen is gross. The microwave ugh ugh ugh no thanks. No one can clean everything. This is why all my cookware and dishes are in my room. That way I can make sure I 1) Still Own It and 2) Its clean and usable. I clean them as I go and just use my own shit.

Nothing compares to the bathrooms, though. It seems like every other day one of the toilets are clogged. Last week there were spoons in the sink?? Like at least 10 spoons. In the bathroom sink. The floor is dirty because no one owns a mop and?? there was one in the kitchen?? I haven’t seen it in like a month. And the worst of all. Okay, it’s really bad when every one up here is between like. 16 and 19 I think? And I had to put up a sign in the bathroom asking people to flush when you’re done??? And I still have to flush before I can use the washroom???? And it feels like every week or so. The toilet’s clogged. Oh! I forgot to mention that the water closet doesn’t even have a doorknob anymore. Someone took it. But wait, it gets worse. Seriously if extremely unsanitary things bother u, stop reading now.

Twice in the past month I’ve had to contact the landlord because the toilets were beyond clogged. The first time was bad but oh lord nothing compares to the second time (aka last week). The first time was your pretty standard toilet clogs and backs up and its very gross. I contacted the landlord and it was fixed the next day and it was fine. For. Two Days. Im serious. See. People here have a real issue it seems of “The person before me didn’t flush so neither will I”, leading to a toilet bowl full of like. a half a roll of toilet paper and waste. F u n. What that led to was the toilet clogging, people not doing anything about it, and continuing to use it. Eventually the toilet bowl was full, so trow a shopping bag over the lid to mark the toilet as “Out of order” and move on to the other one.Both toilets were completely unusable. I emailed the landlord and i don’t know if either they or one of the people living here contacted them, but the old landlord and old property manager were here the other day to clean them out and fix them?? and yea among all the standard waste you’d expect in a toilet, there were needles? Like buddy theres a trash can right there? I know u had the needle caps bc they were in there too. just... disgusting...

bro this is just what i can think of off the top of my head i know theres more but oh no this is so long now. just. this is a lot more detail than u wanted but i wanted to get this out of my brain??

i feel like a lot of ppl on this site see a callout post for BTS, look at all of the problematic things they did in the past, and immediately ‘cancel’ them or see that as a valid reason to finally hate them or kpop in general, without considering the context of the situations or how the kpop industry works.

im definitely not here to defend the things they said or did, because it WAS gross. but those things are also from 3-5 years ago, have apologized for or had no control over whether it happened or not.

this post serves as a ‘clearing their name’ type of post, and will actually take a look into the problematic things theyve done and how they dealt with it, along with all the positive things they have done in the past few years. it will be pretty lengthy and will have lots of sources/screenshots. before i get into this though, i want to say that no one is obligated to like BTS, or forgive them for what they/their label did. you reserve the right to feel the way you feel, however that may be. that being said, this post is for people who never saw the apologies, who vaguely know who BTS are and saw only bad things about them, who want to get into BTS but aren’t sure if they’re extremely problematic, and more.

starting off, i want to explain the context behind the links of this post. i would link the original, but op has deleted it. so, obviously, yes bts did do all of the above. but like i said before, it was 3-5 (now, technically 6) years ago. when BTS debuted in 2013, they were all 21 or under. 15-16 year old Jungkook being the youngest, and Seokjin being the oldest at 21. they were merely teenagers and on top of this, had no or very little control of their self image. the hairstyles & photoshoots, the boys had no control over. bighit and bts’ stylists are in charge of these things. if you want someone to be angry at, be angry at bighit, bts’ label company. this includes RM’s hairstyle back in the ‘No More Dream’ era / early debut days, Suga’s dreads, and any other hairstyle, clothing, or photoshoot that caused controversy. (in case anyone, who isn’t familiar with kpop, is confused; kpop label companies usually control everything their idols do. from what they wear, to what their songs are about, to if they’re even allowed to date. it’s a very disgusting industry that has a history of abuse, but that’s an entirely different subject i could get into.)

here is an article where BigHit apologizes for the antisemitism + the ‘bombing’ shirt Jimin wore, and they explicitly state that “the band members were ‘in no way responsible’ for the controversy.” which further proves my point that the boys had no control over what they wore/how they looked.

here is a thread about RM’s racist behavior in the past, and admitting + apologizing for what he did, including how he has changed certain lyrics of songs because they could be seen as (or were) misogynist. to this day, RM hates and regrets how his hair looked at the time.

in case anyone doesn’t want to read the entire thread, RM says this: “As I went through the year 2016 I came to think about that. My words or behaviors, regardless of my intentions, could cause troubles or hurt others feelings. In the process, I thought I need to hold responsibility for that and I need to think about such things. What I said or did would not be undone. I thought so. Then I learned how to admit myself. [...] Anyways, to become a better person, I need to hold responsibility for what I do. I need to change my mindset. I need to change my way of thinking if it’s wrong. I learned I need to hear from many people. I mean, I came to think like that. Now when I do something, I think, ‘how would people feel about my act?’” 

again, this is not excuses for what they did, but rather how/why it happened or how they had no choice in the matter & what they had to say about it afterwards. BTS are living, growing people who have acknowledged their mistakes and apologized. in RM’s speech at the U.N. he says this: “Maybe I made a mistake yesterday, but yesterday’s me is still me. I am who I am today, with all my faults. Tomorrow I might be a tiny bit wiser, and that’s me, too. These faults and mistakes are what I am, making up the brightest stars in the constellation of my life. I have come to love myself for who I was, who I am, and who I hope to become.”

since the apology part of this post is mostly over, i wanted to talk about the good things that bts has done in the past few years. things like their continuous support of the LGBT community, the powerful messages in their music, the bending of the ‘typical kpop style’, etc.

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over the years and as their popularity grew, BTS have actually managed to seemingly take more control over what they stand for and how they present themselves and their music. since around 2017, BTS have made a very impactful social stance with their string of albums & their concept: “Love Yourself”. for people who don’t know, this concept consists of three albums over the course of 2016-2018 and are in order as follows: LOVE YOURSELF 承 'Her', LOVE YOURSELF 轉 'Tear' LOVE YOURSELF 結 'Answer'

the summarized version of the stories are love at first sight, the failing/one-sided-ness of said love, and then learning how to love and accept yourself before you are fully able to love others. along with this concept came the partnership with the anti-violence campaign, UNICEF, who work to protect young people from all over the world. the entire album concept consistently promotes self-love and acceptance, something that is not very explored in kpop or even western pop music in general. while some of the songs in “LY: Her” use female pronouns, almost all the rest of them across all the albums use gender neutral or no pronouns. this was done intentionally by RM (who writes/produces a majority of their songs), as he believes “feelings/love transcend genders, cultures, and barriers between people.” the title song of “LY: Her”, “DNA”, (as stated in the screenshot) further expresses this idea with the lyrics: “None of this is a coincidence Because we’re the two who found our destiny - I only focus on you You steer me a little harder The DNA of the genesis wants you This is inevitable, I love us We are the only true lovers”

and in “Serendipity”, as well:

“The universe has moved for us Without missing a single thing Our happiness was meant to be Cuz you love me, and I love you”

while, obviously, there is one ‘her’ pronoun in the song, most of it expresses what RM says. and bighit being bighit, im sure they had some say in how the lyrics were presented, esp since it was the title song. what i’m trying to say is that i truly believe BTS are doing their best to support the lgbt community, even with the tight restrictions that their label and the kpop genre puts on them. being on the topic of LGBT+ and support of the community, here is suga pretty much saying he’s bi. + and of course, his iconic lyrics in “Cypher Pt.3″

here is the bisexual flag colors in j-hope’s music video for his song “Daydream”.

RM saying he liked “Same Love” twice as much after reading about the lyrics, and Suga outright saying “Nothing is wrong. Everyone is equal.” in the first screenshot.

Jungkook’s love and support for troye sivan + Jimin wearing jeans with lyrics of troye sivan’s “Youth” on them

bts defying gender norms over and over and over.

fondness & friendship with/of multiple lgbt artists

RM referencing the film “Moonlight” in the song “4 O’Clock”

RM wrote the lyrics for GLAM’s song “XXO”,  that say “Are you a boy? Girl? I don’t care, passion is the key”

Jungkook and Jimin covering the song “We Don’t Talk Anymore” and not changing the pronouns.

an excerpt from RM’s speech at the U.N. ;  “Tell me your story. I want to hear your voice, and I want to hear your conviction. No matter who you are, where you’re from, your skin color, gender identity: speak yourself.” + full transcript here.

and these are just things i can think of off the top of my head. as for their political stance and social messages in their music, & talking about other things considered taboo in kpop (such as mental health/illness), here you go:

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suga talking about (his) mental health and struggles in various songs on his mixtape.

their ENTIRE “IDOL” music video is basically a response to how people stereotype them/the kpop genre & have said that they are “too westernized”. the song includes a “traditional African-Korean sound”, the boys wearing hanboks/traditional korean clothing, on top of lots of korean history references & symbolism, and how they take pride in what they do. here is a really good video analyzing & explaining the mv. heres 3 more posts explaining why it sounds/looks the way it does, and how BTS did it intentionally. in case nobody has seen/heard the song, here is the first verse: “You can call me artist (artist) You can call me idol (idol) No matter what you call me I don’t care I’m proud of it”

the song “Epiphany” on “LY: Answer”, is (as you can imagine) a song about having an epiphany about loving yourself. the lyrics are pretty self-explanatory. the chorus: “I’m the one I should love in this world Shining me, precious soul of mine I finally realized so I love me Not so perfect but so beautiful I’m the one I should love”

RM talking about his mental health/depression in “Forever Rain” on his mixtape “mono.” + as well as in “Reflection.” the outro of the song which i wanted to add, is just a repeated “I wish I could love myself.”

the lyrics to the song “I’m Fine” on LY: Answer express being able to love yourself without relying on somebody to fix you or make you happier, because only you can complete yourself.

the outro to the album, “Answer: Love Myself” concludes the Love Yourself album series, and has extremely beautiful lyrics. the full translation here, if anyone wants to read all of them. it’s about, as im sure you can guess, loving yourself even with all your flaws and mistakes & striving to be a better person each day.

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SO TLDR; BTS absolutely have made mistakes, like every person does, but have apologized and learned from those mistakes. they have moved on, and have done more good in this world than bad. they have grown over the past 6 years and continue to grow every single day. as a young gay fan, their message and their presence means a lot to me. that fact that they’re so popular and use that power to spread kindness & self-acceptance (no matter Who you are), is really important especially in today’s society. doubly to youth who, themselves, struggle with mental illness and family issues, school/education, and any typical problem young people face in their lives. i have struggled with self-hate, suicidal thoughts, anxiety, trauma, the whole ordeal. their songs have helped me heal, even if only a little. and they give me another reason to keep going everyday. even if you don’t like their music or the boys themselves, there is no denying the positive impact they’ve made on millions of people, adults and children alike. BTS are absolutely not perfect, but they acknowledge this and do their best to BE the best they can be.

i got enabled and spent two hours on a list of serin/bihyung hcs cause they’re my favorite rarepair in existence. Also Like. i Trust bihyung to treat Serin with the mutual respect and patience she deserves (looking @ u nex Ur On THIN Fucking Ice For Ur Past BS).

inital dating

gonna say it right now it took Forever for Bihyung to let his feelings for Serin be revealed and even when they were it was during a less than ideal argument over her needing to take better care of herself and her not getting why he's so concerned over her. needless to say once he did give the reason they were both so stunned they spent a good five to eight minutes frozen. trying to think of what to say. not coming up with much. really just thankful that no one was in the same room as them when it happened.

perhaps the funniest thing abt them as a couple is that most ppl can't tell they're romantically involved unless they catch them during a private moment or date. they aren't the kind of people to have others rlly know they're together. they're very lowkey. Also Cause Their Respective Clans Are Still Bitter At Each Other.

though they do keep knowledge that they're a thing to a select few it's still hard to Not notice how they light up when seeing the other or even just having their name mentioned when apart. for Serin it's an easy feat to hide any expression change, but her eyes will seem less unreadable and indifferent. Bihyung doesn't have the same skill at hiding expressions like Serin, acting a certain way is more his thing. Specifically acting like he dislikes her. Which is something he got good at during their years spent at the academy and having to force himself to ignore his crush as much as possible when seeing her do something cool. But one day his usual sneer like smile seems less smug and more like a friendly mocking one, he also cuts down on the condescending attitude when talking to her.

They can play the frenemies card well but the second they can be alone the act falls apart. they still keep any extra lovey dovey stuff for dates or when they Know it's just the two of them, but they can make just sitting in silence or casual conversation about their day seem really soft and romantic. Especially if they feel comfortable enough to hold hands or place soft and short kisses on the other's cheek. They're very cavity inducing to watch.

their dates are often spent in the more casual, less nobility filled parts of chaos. simple outings to town markets and restaurants. sometimes whenever there's a meeting or formal engagement being held in their respective houses can also end in them disappearing when they aren't needed to the gardens or any quiet place. at some point Serin's father and Bihyung's sister begin to get suspicions about them, but Rain assures Navarus that they're just friends, he's never convinced though. and the ensuring reveal that his daughter IS involved with one of the Serpent's princes does leave him conflicted. But He'd Still Prefer The Serpent Than The Undead.

as a married couple

when it was announced that they were engaged it received unexpected joy from both clans. it was a very sudden and unseen development, shocking especially the higher members of both societies and even angering some, but more than anyone the people were happy to learn about it.

the marriage ceremony had been a very small and secret event with only family and close friends present. it was a traditional Serpent marriage.

even when they are married and everyone knew it they still kept a very professional relationship when carrying out their duties. with the exception of not being afraid anymore to kiss the other or tease each other in public.

Bihyung is noticeably the more willing to be affectionate when around others. it's usually limited to just hand holding or leaning against her, gently placing his head atop her's. Serin is more likely to tease or otherwise poke fun at him when given the chance. Really goes for the embarrassing stuff. He'll usually get his revenge in some form or another later on.

Did you know Serin is strong enough to carry a full grown man??? if you doubt her and her sheer strength we can't be friends.

In context, Bihyung is actually a surprisingly affectionate person and loves showing as much love and care to Serin as much as possible. even if that means sticking to her hip and wrapping his arms around her like a sloth when they're alone. She'll feign annoyance but finds it very cute. He also enjoys her (fake) irritated noises as she tries to do anything in the house with him glued to her back. occasionally she'll straight up give him a piggy back ride. He's always a mix between being embarrassed or really impressed at her strength.

They're a very soft and good couple that are the epitome of both a power couple AND a super hot one please think abt it for a second.

They both get ungodly long and beautiful hair as they grow older. Bihyung plays it cool any time Serin says he copied her by saying he actually copied his brother. Both are kind of a lie cause the truth is he just liked having Serin brush his hair so he grew it out so she could spend a bit more time brushing it. They both actually help each other with their hair in the morning.

As much as they enjoy being a lovey dovey couple they're still rivals who can be seen practicing every now and then. Not only does it keep them at the top of the game but it also gives them an excuse to stay in bed the next day. They really don't hold it back when it comes to their supposed practice fights. They don't hold back when it comes to A Lot of things actually. interpret that as you will.

bonus What If They Had Kids

i WAS gonna go with Siana and Nin but i already have some hcs abt Bihyung being their adoptive dad in an au where Serin just says Fuck It and seeks asylum in Serpent that i'll talk abt One Day/probably soon.

Serin is all for kids but Bihyung takes a while to warm up to the idea. Not because he doesn't want any but rather cause he's. Unsure he'd be a good parent. Even when it does happen he still remains nervous.

As corny as it is though the second he holds their child for the first time he can't bring himself to let go of them, all unease or nerves he had moments prior seemingly gone. even when Serin asks to hold them too he says no softly. She can't bring herself to get mad cause between the way he said no and just the sight of him holding their child he’s actually super cute in that moment.

Can you imagine the sort of kid they'd have. Can you imagine just how much potential and power a kid between them would have. Can You.

For such dreary people they sure do light up when they start their own little family. If they seemed content before as just a couple then they're the definition of happiness when seen with their child.

They're both equal parts strict parent and fun parent. Even when they're strict though it comes off very guiding like and very soft. Child neglect and yelling/criticizing a child?? Not in this household.

Within the first year they both commission a plethora of family photos. a photo for each month. It quickly becomes something of a tradition.

One Time when their child was four they Demanded to go help Bihyung with his duties. He spent a good five minutes trying to convince them that being the substitute leader of a clan is boring and that they'd have more fun visting grandpa Navarus with Serin but got done in the second he thought he heard a soft sniffle.

The sight of him walking around the main castle and ordering people around with a four year old held in one arm was quite the sight. especially when he'd go from cutesy dad to stoic hardass.

Serin really wishes she could have been there to see it all. Luckily Rain was there and documented Everything.

It's common knowledge Serin likes dressing up so it's also common knowledge her child is the best dressed baby in both the Demon and Serpent clans. She also greatly enjoys having them all match during family outings. even when he's royalty Bihyung strays from wearing such eye catching clothing and only does it cause Serin's smile is nice, as well as her comments about how handsome he looks, doesn't quite get how a color can bring out his eyes more, but her smile is nice. The only time it wasn't as nice was that time when she made him wear pants with a slit in the sides and the shirt was a bit lower than he was use to. The Demons have an odd taste in clothing.

Serin's that scary looking but actually super soft and loving goth mom i can't get the picture of her kissing her child on the cheek as she says bye cause it's their first day of school but she's wearing dark lipstick so they're just stuck with this kiss imprint on their cheek for the rest of the day cause Serin couldn't wipe it off completely out of my head it’s too cute.

So there’s a post going around that’s popped up on my dash a lot lately, about the secret to fandom being love what you love and don’t worry about what anyone else is doing.

I.....look, its not really a shock to anyone that I Couldn’t Disagree More Strongly, right? LOL.

The problem I have with posts like that is they don’t make a distinction between “like what you like and don’t worry about if other people agree b/c everybody likes different things and there’s never going to be something that pleases everybody, so don’t try and base your fandom opinions/ships around pleasing everyone” 

and

“like what you like and don’t worry about if other people agree b/c people are racist and sexist and homophobic and there’s nothing you can do about it so don’t devote your fandom experience/time/energy to having a problem if the reasons people are hating on your favorite characters, stories, opinions are rooted in racism, sexism, homophobia and other shit.”

Like, these are two ENTIRELY different things, and the first is valid and fine and I agree completely but the second is HELL FUCKING NO. And the problem is when you spread around fandom positivity posts that put no effort or awareness into acknowledging that these are two entirely different phenomenon, effectively all you do is give implicit support to the people who deliberately REFUSE to acknowledge a difference and thus point to fandom positivity posts as fodder for why someone’s being Difficult for pushing back against bigoted bullshit.

Fandom isn’t a fun, shiny happy place and it isn’t MEANT to be, because all fandom is....is another place/way in which humans congregate around a certain shared interest or focus. That’s it. That’s all fandom inherently is, which means when you push back against people ruining it by ‘worrying about what other ppl are doing in it aka being shitty bigots’ on the grounds that they’re infecting it with like....reality? idek. But you’re simply doing the exact same thing humanity does in EVERY SINGLE SPACE it carves out for people to congregate for whatever reason or purpose......and that thing is the group or groups who hold a majority in that space speaking over or shutting down anyone who has something to say that the majority do not want to hear for whatever reason.

People turn to fandom for escapism a lot of the time. I get that. Everyone needs escapism from reality. Everyone DESERVES a place to go to get away from the cares of reality and enjoy themselves.

But here’s the problem: there’s a lot of things in life that EVERYONE deserves, but only some people actually get.

And while I fundamentally agree with the idea that everyone deserves a fun fandom experience and a place to escape to.....it becomes a problem if the only way you can maintain that fun fandom experience and escapist refuge is by shutting down other people when they say ‘hey, this place isn’t as fun for me and all the problems I came here to escape from are still here thanks to these people.’

Because once you do that, you’re essentially no longer saying that you think everyone deserves a fun fandom experience or escape from reality. You’re saying you deserve it MORE than those other people.

Don’t get me wrong, I think we all need to figure out a balance for ourselves, and prioritize what’s best for our own mental health and emotional well being. I’m not telling people to develop martyr complexes or bullshit like that. We have to take care of ourselves before we take care of other people. That’s a thing. It’s true. We don’t do anyone any favors by neglecting what we need to get through the day. It’s OKAY to be selfish sometimes. It’s just not okay to be selfish all the time, or to say what you’re doing to put yourself first has no impact on anyone else.

Like, its literally just about being aware of reality?

I’m just saying, there’s a difference between focusing yourself on a corner of fandom that’s solely about the things you like and not worrying about what’s going on elsewhere because its what you need to do FOR YOU, because there’s things in your life you need escape from, because in this place you retreat to in order to replenish your spirit, you don’t have the spoons to spend on anything but that, so you have the strength to go about your day....

and between telling people to just like what they like and not worry what anyone else is doing or saying even when they pop up to give you shit for what you like, no, just blacklist things and block people and continue liking what you like, that’s the secret to a good fandom experience.

And that’s where I go like, ummm....no. Again, mental health and well being is a priority. Absolutely people should blacklist and block people and just look for positivity with like-minded individuals if that’s what they need to get something enjoyable out of a fandom experience.

But my problem specifically lies with the flip side of that, the implication that fans are doing something wrong by yes, worrying about what other people are doing and how this impacts them and their fandom experiences, and responding to and reacting to and calling attention to the fact that shitty people are being shitty in fandom, just as they are elsewhere in realms of human interaction.

Because that’s when you get into telling people with less power to suck it up and settle for the fact that they have less power, and that the people with more power will always be shitty so the best thing you can do for yourself is to find a way to ignore that.

That’s not how society is supposed to work, just because the people with the most power in society have spent generations just trying to convince everyone else that this is how society is supposed to work.

Power, voice, visibility, are not excuses to be shitty. The inability of people to effectively push back against you being shitty, is not an excuse to be shitty. This is how its always been, is not an excuse to be shitty.

And we know this. We ALL know and understand this. As a society, we have NO problem using collectively held opinions to push back against things we all agree are shitty, and no, I’m not talking about laws even, so much as....shame, the way we express opinions to each other and about certain things, the way we interact with each other and acknowledge what are and aren’t acceptable social behaviors.

Like, we shame people for committing certain awful crimes. We all do this. We say murdering innocent people is bad, and cast shame at people who do it. We teach kids (supposedly, hah) that taking stuff that doesn’t belong to you just because you want it isn’t acceptable. We all, as a society, shape what is or isn’t considered behavior we’re willing to put up with from each other in an endless variety of ways.

And guess what? Like all tools, the tools with which we do this do at times end up used in negative ways as well as positive. To harm instead of help. Absolutely there’s a LONG history of people in power hijacking the tools with which society determines what is and isn’t acceptable behavior and using it to advance their specific agenda, encouraging people to turn on each other or specific groups and express that certain acts or behaviors or entire identities are shameful, not because they actually are but because it serves the purposes of those in power to convince people that they are.

But a tool being used wrongly in the wrong hands does not like.....magically negate the validity of that tool or its ability to be used positively, and that’s where online culture, and fandom specifically, so often has me going UMM WHUH?

We’ve got people out here proudly and defiantly taking a stand against ‘being shamed’ for stuff like pedophilic works of art as though they’re the disenfranchised underdog, the powerless victim pushing back against the oppressor because SHAME IS BAD AND THUS ANYONE TRYING TO SHAME ME IS BAD or whatever.....as though we haven’t as a society collectively spent the last several decades saying umm yeah, pedophilia is shameful.

I’m not looking to get into the fiction vs reality argument here since I’ve had that one to death elsewhere, but also because its not the point. The point isn’t whether certain fans should feel ashamed or not for specific behaviors others express should be shameful.....the point is the way so many people in fandom seem to be in agreement that the very ACT of someone trying to shame someone else, or express disapproval of their behavior.....has somehow been come to be seen as a call to arms, as though that in and of itself is the issue, not whether or not there’s merit to either side’s position.

Like its all or nothing, regardless of context. 

So many people in fandom are happy to act like other groups in fandom (USUALLY made up of marginalized communities or people expressing ‘controversial’ and thus less commonly held opinions) - so many people act as though those groups expressing judgment over some other part of fandom’s behavior is in and of itself an UNACCEPTABLE attack, something that should never be condoned....instead of simply an example of what society has ALWAYS done to convey whether or not certain behaviors are acceptable.

Again, I’m not talking about the MANNER in which this judgment is expressed. I don’t give a single fuck about hearing arguments about how ‘antis’ are ‘just as bad’ as people who create fanworks they consider harmful or toxic and how they harass people, etc.

I’m not saying that never happens. I’m not saying that’s okay. I’m just saying....that is not the point I’m making here, not the point plenty of other people have made before me, and yet its one of the handful of expected and predictable responses that ALWAYS come up as though it (true or not) addresses the actual point. Which it does not.

The point is....take issue with the specific reasons someone pushes back against certain behaviors, fine. You don’t have to automatically agree they’re right. Take issue with the specific ways someone pushes back against certain behaviors, fine. You don’t have to condone them or say they’re justified.

But don’t dance around the issue as though you’re incapable of grasping that the point is its not somehow wrong or victimizing or oppressive for people to express that they think certain opinions and behaviors are shitty and bad.

The fact that shame has been used to oppress at times in the past does not mean that a bunch of people gathering together to express “We think this thing that you’re doing here is bad” is like....inherently oppressive ESPECIALLY THE FUCK WHEN THE BUNCH OF PEOPLE GATHERING TOGETHER HAVE LESS POWER THAN THOSE THEY’RE CALLING OUT BECAUSE OF THE TWO GROUPS, THEY’RE THE ONES WHO ARE ACTUALLY OPPRESSED.

Because when the only alternative to people expressing they feel certain behaviors in fandom spaces are harmful, oppressive, toxic, or in other ways impairing other peoples’ ability to have a fun fandom experience or use it for escapism.....is to tell those people to just ignore all that toxicity and focus on something positive, like.....call it what you will, but that’s not for their benefit, its for the benefit of those who like and are comfortable with the status quo.

NO SHITTY BEHAVIOR IN HUMAN HISTORY HAS EVER BEEN ‘FIXED’ BY TELLING ITS VICTIMS TO IGNORE IT.

The ONLY thing that has ever accomplished is to allow people who are capable of ignoring it without their lives in any way being impacted....to continue to go about what they were doing, without seeing or feeling there’s any reason for things to change, for efforts to be expended, for them to have to adjust their view of their surroundings or how they interact with their surroundings or other people within them.

And like, lol, but ‘having the choice whether or not to acknowledge something because it doesn’t innately affect your life either way’ is literally another way of describing privilege, so....I mean.....

ANYWAY.

ww84 confused the fuck out of me. i genuinely enjoyed watching it and I think most of the criticism is pretty valid, but like it wasn't,,, that bad. A lot of the stuff I have a problem with is things that I was able to put in the back of my head and still enjoy the movie so I don't like the vehement hate and shit people are saying (unless it's about the racist shit, i’m am not uncomfortable with vehemently hating on the racist ass shit in this movie) but other than that like,,,, idk it was pretty good.

Spoilers for ww84 below

the plot wasn't amazing but compared to Infinity War? Endgame? Jesus christ is call ww84 a masterpiece compared to anything marvels put out in the past five years. I didn't enjoy the entire oil barron middle eastern/egyptian plot point. That was completely unnecessary and racist. Pretty much the entirety of what happened in egypt was,,,, not,,,, okay,,,, i’m not going to go into it but like that's a completely genuine criticism because what the fuck were they aiming for there??? The non-white and clearly middle eastern dude wishing for nukes while holding a gun??? What???

Next one isn't "racism" but like who decided to write, cast, produce, and film the scene where the woman wishes to deport all irish ppl and the irish dude wishes to kill her??? What the fuck was that??? It needed more context and if ur criticizing a movie and you say "needed more context" it means it probably didn't need or shouldn't have been there in the first place.

Uhhh what else,,,, loved kristen wiig. omg. But,,,, why was the entire plot line between her and diana just pitting them against each other?? The entire subplot didn't even result in any character developed that it showed Barbara doesnt "learn to love herself" or anything she's just like "wow having superpowers is stressful, nvm" and she barely even does that??? Also the part where it's showing her losing her "humanity" and she beats the shit out of her attempted rapist. Loved that part EXCEPT. Why is that how she loses her kindness? Like i've seen people say the part where she actually loses it is when she tells her friend to mind his own business, but anyone (esp straight dudes) watching that and even a lot of women could take it as framing her beating up the asshole as bad?? Like my dream would be to beat up ppl who've assaulted me or made me uncomfortable so the fact that they even left room for the audience to question which part was her losing her humanity made me iffy about it. Overall it's one of the things I think they could cut from the movie and it wouldn't make any difference.

something I liked about it was the cgi. It's been getting a lot of shit because it's cringey at points but like,,, I loved it. The parts where she's flying just felt like a comic book and yeah maybe it's not realistic, world changing cgi quality but it made me happy and I think trying to go for the ultra realistic shit would've taken away from the whole theme they were pushing with Diana's character which was truth and love. I've never read the comics or seen any other DC movies (other than the first gal gadot wonder woman) but she just felt like a cool character and watching her I really understood her falling in love with humanity. Her whole character might not had grown much in the movie in terms of a formal arc, but watching her grieve and mourn the loss of Steve and then go through the cycle of falling in love with humans again was genuine and just fun to watch for me personally. Was it a little repetitive to being steve back? I mean yeah, but like,, they played up the fact that she was still mourning him and hadn't let go yet so I didn't mind it at all.

I didn't understand the whole him possessing another person thing tho. Like them fucking in that random dudes apartment and taking his stuff just felt wrong??? And it's not even addressed?? They could've just brought Steve back in his own body like they made the porsches and nukes appear out of nowhere and completely avoided the rapey, gross, tones it gave off. Add this to the list of things this movie did that made me uncomfortable and were there for seemingly no plot reason I can think of. They made such a big deal out of Barbara getting cat called and sexually harassed/assaulted just to completely violate a male character? Male sexual assault already doesn't get enough attention and you can't tell me that it's weird and unnecessary that the writers have steve possessing this guy while also stressing female sexual assault and going as far as beating up an abuser. And then not even MENTION the guy steve is possessing other than saying he's hot?? Seriously just take out that entire section of the movie and you've got a plot that's starting to make sense, but instead they just don't.

I had to filter the tag for the guy who played max lord because jfc,,,, first of all not looking for madalorian spoilers and I just don't understand this obsession with his character. The acting was good but the writing was eh. It feels like the Max Lord in this movie was really complicated and had the potential to be a cool character with looking into the abuse, his child, being a single dad, the want to make his son proud and that relationship, like he just seemed like he could be a cool "villian" who's misunderstood and needs to calm down, but it was too much. I didn't even realize he was the kid being abused until I read a review after the movie and there was so much going on with the plots of developing Steve and Dianasa relationship, showing Barbara's character arc, and the entire world falling apart, that it really took away from Lord. Instead of cutting any of it to make Lord a well rounded and explained character or make him more stereotypical villian and expand on the Cheetahs character, they crammed everything into one and failed at both. Don't get me wrong, I enjoyed watching the movie, but it just feels like they just bit off more than they could chew but didn't realize it. I would much rather see a Max Lord villian centric movie that goes into Wonder Woman vs Lord and his character and then a separate Cheetah movie that went more into Diana and Barbara's friendship and saving her from losing her humanity, even if it writing that movie means completely taking her out of the Max Lord plot line. Over all id really like to see a good movie about two women struggling with power, loss, and existing in society where the writers don't pin them against each other with little to no plot explanation and a confusing fight scene that brought in a whole new subplot (asteria or whatever) out of NOWHERE.

In conclusion just do better next time. I enjoyed watching the movie. I enjoyed criticizing the movie. I would watch it again. I feel like the writers really got stuck between the desire to make the worlds greatest superhero movie that blows all of the others out of the water with a complicated plot and tons of characters and just the desire to make a good, entertaining movie. Not every piece of media has to be the new best thing since sliced bread and the cheesy cgi, flying, and "love and trust" references really got back to the roots of a good superhero movie, but then they went so far with the subplots it's like they couldn't decide what they were going for and turned what could've been that genuinely good superhero movie into a fucking mess with racist undertones, a convoluted plot, and a whole bunch of shit that genuinely made no sense.

..."there is a looooong history between them that brings a lot of context to the moment [but ill put that in a different post];"...

this is mentioned in a post I made for @ygreczed s latest tag game and this is the "Context" post

Gouenji realized an attraction he had to Fudou when they were in the FFI team. He saw how much Fudou practices and worked hard even when he wasn't being allowed to play at the beginning. Gouenji noticed his concerns for Kidou and his determination to be his truest self astray from Kageyama. Between his passion for soccer, how hard he continued to practice and dedicate himself so he could play, and how Fudou believed in the teams abilities to keep up with his aggressive plays, it was hard not to fall and fall hard for him.

Houenji started to think Fudou was cuter and cutter as the days became weeks. Every face the boy made, remark he threw out, the way he hid his warmer/nicer feelings to seem strong, and just everything else he did. Gouenji ignored it and just treated Fudou the way he did all his teammates. He wasn't going to the same school with him anyway so it's not like he would see Fudou after the FFI.

When high school started, though, Fudou became half of his thoughts. Endou asked Gouenji, a few weeks into school, to help look for Fudou bc he was missing. His mother had passed away and no one could find him anywhere. Gouenji looked as if he'd lost Yuuka. He worried and asked every person he knew to help. He eventually even got a hold of Kudou and ask for him to help Fudou. He wanted Fudou to have something to come back to when they found him (if they found him, but Gouenji wasn't ready to accept that possibility).

It was almost two more weeks before they found Fudou and Gouenji couldn't have been happier. The issue now was figuring out why his heart beat skipped so happily when he heard the good news.

Fusing ended up going to school at his high school (along with endou, kidou, and a few others) but he seemed more...defeated. Fudou was a warrior that never stopped, Gouenji had already seen that in him, but this was not the same. Gouenji ended up talking to Fudou about his mom, admitting feelings from when he lost his own mother, and connecting them with those feelings. It was a lot for Fudou and it meant the world to him,,, having someone that understood what he felt. Bc of this, they became friends. Fudou trusted his feeling with Gouenji.. bc of how he was and bc he felt that same grief. Fudou fell in love with the vulnerable person he saw in Gouenji that day.

They were friends for all their high school years, Gouenji was pretty and slept around a bit more than he would like to admit. Fudou would always lecture him that no one is going to date a guy who's slept around like that and would even make lighy jokes at the fact. But they got closer and closer, even hanging out away from school. Fudou could open up to Gouenji, bitch about Kidou being overbearing, or just sit silently at his house. It was the biggest comfort in his life and it helped chill him out a lot.

But every second together made Gouenji love Fudou more. His rough way of speaking, the way he twisted his hair when he was thinking, how he slept, the way he laughed... everything was perfect. Fudou only got prettier as they matured and his messy curls didn't help the fact. Gouenji would make open passed at Fudou but they would all get turned down "as jokes" bc of Gouenji's playboy reputation at school.

When they graduated, Fudou vanished and no one knew to where. Gouenji had an idea.. he knew that Fudou wanted to study abroad and become a pro. Gouenji, himself, wanted to become a doctor so he was sure they'd see each other again when they weren't as busy. Maybe he'd finally get the guys to confess then..

YEARS LATER...

Seeing Fudou again was startling. He was hard to recognise with all that hair; he was also taller and a little broader (for once). But he was still beautiful, maybe more than before. The issue now was that he was in the opposite side of the soccer field. Gouenji watched from above as Fudou, Endou, and his other friends fought against his team and fifth sector. It was expected and things were going how they should have been, but seeing Fudou again brought his feeling back and they hit him like a bus.

After the revolution ended and Gouenji felt safe approaching his old friends, he was ready to see Fudou again and maybe even confess. These feelings were going nowhere and he was tried of holding them in.

When he had time to actually see his friends again (and to see fudou again♡), he was happy.. and ready. But life fire-tornado kicked him in the stomach when he got to finally catch up with the love of his life, bc fudou was married.

This broke his heart, a feeling he hadn't experienced since Yuuka's accident, and he lost any confidence he tjoughtbhe had to confess. He'd even lost his hope, something he helps into for all their years apart.

They still hung out, they were friends and Gouenji was probably Fudou's closest friend. But the reality was that Fudou had been married for most of their years apart and even had a daughter now. Gouenji fell a bit distant, trying to hide his heartbreak and protect himself.

Another year passed and the FFI had started back up. Fudou became a recreational coach to a team that didn't make it in the official team and Gouenji worried about the fate of the world (again). It distracted him but the sad truth is that he still loved fudou and his heart skipped and sped up every time they were together.

Fudou hadn't told anyone but one of the reasons he accepted being a coach was bc he got divorced and needed a distraction to keep himself together. He was too scared to tell his high school crush his feelings (bc he had a rep of playing with ppls hearts) and tried to move on, only to lose that person to. He was already broken before it all and none of this was helping. They were both so close to how they were before graduation but so much between them was keeping their feelings apart.

Futon didn't realize he still loved Gouenji... not until that night.... their first time,, the only confession Fudou could gather the courage to give. It was the happiest night of their lives