#I like Nikolai. I love Nikolai. I just don’t agree with him being the best choice to rule Ravka as it is rn | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

osachiyo · 8 months

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❏ SEETHING ENVY !

﹙ ✿ ﹚── includes : dazai, chuuya, kunikida, ranpo, fyodor & nikolai x fem! reader

﹙ ✿ ﹚── content warnings : nsfw content, jealousy, threats of cheating, toxic relationship in nikolai's, pussy slapping, choking, scratching, name calling, degradation, msub in Dazai’s, yandere reader in Nikolai's, edging, toys, oral (m & f receiving), brief mention of murder and torture but it's very vague, throat fucking etc

﹙ ✿ ﹚── synopsis : jealousy jealousy

﹙ ✿ ﹚── author's note : I know the sneak peak of this post had a different title but I think this one suits it way more. Happy reading! Requests are open btw! ♡

﹙ ✿ ﹚── MINORS DNI

DAZAI ⋆ ࣪.* ࣪.⋆

Dazai loves to see all of your reactions. He finds them so amusing. Your eyes shining bright like stars when you're happy, when you're practically jumping with excitement, your cheeks heating up when you're flustered, your pretty eyes narrowing and brows furrowing when you're angry or upset, your eyes glossing over as they threaten to overspill the tears when you're sad...He loves to see them all. So that's why he comes up with the idea to make you jealous. I mean, what could go wrong?

You watch your lover’s eyes roll back from overstimulation, his cock swollen and angry from being used so many times. But you didn’t care, just like he didn’t care about how pissed you’d be while flirting with that waitress from the cafe. God, was it infuriating. But it’s alright, you would never miss a chance to mark your man up nicely, your nails clawing on his back while he hissed from the sting. But he didn’t complain, he actually enjoyed the pain of you marking your ownership over him.

“You fucking manwhore, how many times did you cum?” You scoffed, your hips not slowing down. You slapped his cheek gently when he didn’t answer, the soft flesh damp with sweat and your slick. He opened his eyes, looking up at you riding the soul out of him, your soft tits bouncing with every slam, your plump ass meeting his hips while he massaged the soft fat. “Fuck- uh.. four?—“ he wheezed when your hands wrapped around his throat even tighter, making it hard for him to breathe. “Wrong answer… let’s keep going until you get it right- Haah— okay?” He could only throw his head back in response, shooting blanks into your puffy cunt.

He had a long night ahead of him.

CHUUYA ⋆ ࣪.* ࣪.⋆

Chuuya was a very confident man. He was confident in himself and your relationship. But that stupid fuck Dazai—

“Hey~ Belladonna, are you here alone?” Dazai smirked, taking your hand in his larger one before gently kissing your palm. “You look like you could use some company, no?” He was about to kiss your knuckles but suddenly— “She’s fine.” Your hand gets snatched away by your boyfriend, Chuuya. Dazai shows a face of disgust before sighing in disappointment. “Yeah okay, whatever. If you need some better company, don’t be shy to ask Chuuya for my number, pretty gi—!” A punch was thrown at his face.

“Stupid fucking suicidal piece of shit..” Chuuya mumbled, head squashed between your thighs which were decorated with bruises. Shades of purple and blue staining your pretty skin as he sucked on it, dangerously close to your core. His hand smoothed out the fabric of your expensive dress. When you agreed to go to a bar with your fiancé, you didn’t expect to be eaten out by him in one of the fancy bathroom stalls. Your hands were struggling to find something to stabilize yourself. “Chuuya..what if someone— mm..what if someone comes in..?” He only groaned in response, finally taking you into his warm mouth while his hands played with the soft fat of your ass. “Let them.” He muttered into your pussy, the vibrations of his gruff voice made your toes curl as your hand came down to find itself tangled in his copper locks. As if the universe had heard you, someone walks in. You put your other hand over your mouth, trying your best to silence any noises that could slip out. Then suddenly— the unknown man spoke and you recognized that voice easily. It was Dazai.

Chuuya only pulled away and smirked, before diving in with ten times more effort. He had to prove to Dazai that only he could pleasure you like this and you were his.

KUNIKIDA ⋆ ࣪.* ࣪.⋆

Kunikida, bless this man's heart, was the best husband you could ask for. He had it all, looks, stable income, intelligence and he was sweet. You loved how nice he was to you, always making sure you're comfortable and happy. He was the ideal man of your dreams. But as much as you loved him being sweet and kind to you...you wanted something more. You wanted to get on his nerves, wanted to be manhandled by him. So what better way to do that than to make him jealous?

"Stay fucking still." Your husband growled, frantically unbuckling his belt while he held you down with one hand. Once he finally got the belt off, he tied it around your wrists, the expensive leather burning against your soft skin. "You wanna act like a brat? You're gonna get fucked like one." He spit, flipping you over so you laid on your stomach. "Count." That was the last thing you heard until— 'smack!' His calloused hand came down harshly on your ass, making you jolt from the impact. "O-one!" You hissed, your grip tightening on his silk sheets. There was a long pause before the next hit, which was absolutely brutal. The pain shoots through your entire body like electricity while all you can do is writhe and bawl your eyes out, " two- fuuck- 'm sorry! Please! Kuni—" He only scoffed, his fingers dip into your soaked folds and he raises an eyebrow, "You act like you hate it, but your cunt is practically gushing." He tsks, spreading your lips and this time landing a hit on your puffy 'n swollen clit. "Clearly you haven't learnt your lesson if you're still leaking like a desperate whore."

RANPO ⋆ ࣪.* ࣪.⋆

Ranpo's and your's relationship was interesting, to say the least. You two always bickered playfully, sometimes even pranking each other. One time he even put some neon pink dye in your shampoo. But besides that, you wanted revenge. And what better way to get revenge than flirting with his own rival?

You could almost taste your sweet orgasm coming, ready to push you towards the edge but then— Ranpo turns the vibrator off with a laugh, clearly satisfied to see your misery. "How's that, sweetheart?" He smirked, wiping your tears off with his thumbs. You could only babble in response, too fucked out to think any coherent thought but the need to cum.

Ranpo smiles mischeviously, pushing your thighs apart to make room for himself. He licked his lips at the sight of your drooling pussy. A finger pressed the vibrator against your clit and your head tipped back on the pillow. "Thank you for the meal~" He sung before diving head first into your cunt, the vibrator working it's magic against your clit.

FYODOR ⋆ ࣪.* ࣪.⋆

Why were you doing this again? Oh yeah, because that stupid Kolya told you to. You were just hoping and praying to the heavens above that you wouldn't be dead after this. It's a stupid idea but the prize was well worth the pain. All you had to do is flirt with Nikolai and Sigma for one whole day. Surely he wouldn't...mind that much, would he?

Wrong, is what you thought to yourself while you processed the entire situation. You were tied with deep purple ribbons, restricting you against the headboard of the bed. A ring gag in your pretty mouth, a collar around your throat and lastly, a blindfold over your beautiful eyes. You could only hear his footsteps, circling around you like he's the predator and you're his prey.

"So, Milaya, what were you thinking pressing your tits against Sigma like a slut?" His footsteps stopped, it was eerily quiet in the room after Fyodor had stopped speaking. "I did not know that I chose a stupid slut off the streets who will seduce anyone as my wife," he tsked. You felt the bed dip and creak, then a large bony hand was splayed across your bare thigh. "You are one lucky woman that I am not abandoning you. Clearly you don't know who your master, who your God is." He plunged two fingers in your mouth, watching you gag and sputter around them. His other hand was now wrapped around your delicate throat, giving it an experimental squeeze. He thrusted his fingers in and out of your mouth while choking you. You suddenly felt the smooth material of his slacks grinding against your bare cunt, soaking the fabric with your sweet slick.

If only you could see the almost maniacal smile he wore while doing so.

NIKOLAI ⋆ ࣪.* ࣪.⋆

Fucked up, that's what your relationship with Nikolai was. But you didn't care. You loved him and he loved you. All you thought about was him and only him, never even speaking to another man unless you had to. But did he do the same? No he didn't. He'd purposefully flirt and let other women cling onto him like a damn leech, not because he enjoys their attention, no, he did it to rile you up. Watching as you threaten the women viciously, your tone dangerously low as you speak to them. It gets the adrenaline rushing through his veins when you brutally torture and murder these women who he had approached first.

Your face was stained with blood and Nikolai's precum as he tapped the head of his heavy cock against your cheek, montioning for you to open up. You obeyed like the good little girlfriend you were, tongue hanging out and all as you accepted his throbbing cock into your warm mouth, gagging slightly as it hit the back of your throat. He shuddered, grinning down at you, his gloved hand holding your hair up in a makeshift ponytail while you tried your best not to let your eyes roll back. It wasn't even all the way in yet. "Oh just look at you~ struggling to take my cock, dove? Should I get a new bitch, then? I bet she could take my cock f—" His breath hitched and hips stuttered when you suddenly look him all the way down to the base, throat contracting around him. "There we go... I knew you had it in you, pretty thing." Tears were flowing down your cheeks at this point, it fucking hurt. Nikolai let go of your hair and gripped the back of your head instead, slowly pulling you off of his cock until only the tip was inside then slamming back in with full force.

You definitely needed some medicine after.

©sachiyoh— do not copy, plagiarize and repost my works to any platform, likes and reblogs are very appreciated♡

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spacexseven · 1 year

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Thinking about a lil au idea of DOA or Rats of the House of the dead being basically your cult in the god reader idea.

Of course, the other “members” of the cult don’t see you in that much of a big light as Fyodor does (he’s the only one to be THAT devoted to you, really). But they are still members, and little by little they just

Start to like the idea wholeheartedly.

(I love the god reader idea so much it has me in a chokehold rn)

!! anime only's, you have been warned! the following includes spoilers for 2/3 of the unknown (as of now) members of the doa, and other stuff involving the doa.

i'm not writing for kamui 'cos this was a little long as it was. also am sticking w doa 'cos im more comfortable writing for nikolai, sigma and my little vampire rockstar :^^

cw: its kind of a cult, yandere themes (near the end)

you had always known that the rats were only the beginning of fyodor's reign.

and maybe he knew that too—you could hear the soft smile in his voice when he asked you if you thought that the decay of the angel was a better-suited name for an organization that would carry out his plans and catalyze the great destruction you always said he would bring. you don't grace him with an answer, though even you have to agree that it was a name that, once uttered, could unsettle the bravest souls and fill them with trepidation. it was a fitting choice; symbolic, powerful, and ominous.

if anything, the other members were just as unpredictable and unnerving as fyodor was to you once. nikolai was the first you met. you later learned that he went against fyodor's words to come see you, seized by curiosity. bitterly, you realized that the reason why he stared at you so much was because he was studying you, like one would an insect. you almost wanted to seize some of that divine order you had and strike him down for being so blatant about his interest. but when you thought about how fyodor could never look you in the eyes, and how lonely it was as his god, you found yourself taking a liking to the eccentric clown.

there was a side to him, however, you're not sure you like at all. bloodied hands and a wicked grin to match, when anyone else seeks your time. fascination that was both lustful and violent in nature, and a possessive grip that didn't seem to let go of you.

"time for a quiz!" nikolai exclaims, "will the decay of the angel succeed?"

"of course," a wry smile plays at your lips, "who else has a god on their side?"

he laughs in response, loud and uninhibited. it's the most noise that's ever filled your room

sigma was a mystery that had too many missing pieces to be solved. a part of you could sympathize with him, having lost your own self to the blurred-together years and the exhaustion that came with being the only one with your level of sentience. however, you don't let yourself think about the book fyodor had used to create sigma, and what it meant to you. there are some things, you decide, that are best kept to yourself. some things that fyodor should never learn about.

sigma, in your first meeting, was slightly awkward; a perfectly natural response, but not in awe of your presence, not like fyodor. his voice was firm, but not unkind, and his words were respectful, but not...obedient. it was perfect.

in sigma, you found an unlikely friend. he told you about the mundane happenings in the outside world; a customer caught cheating, an employee that struggled to keep up, all the paperwork that was involved in the running of a casino in the sky. these things, as compared to your daily life, were nothing of the sort you would care about, but you listened all the same. regardless, you could tell sigma appreciated the sentiment.

you, however, don't appreciate his strange habits. recently, you think, he's been acting a little too much like fyodor. as much as you liked sigma for the natural ease that you felt by his presence, you couldn't brush off the ominous feeling that came with sigma seeking you out more and more. you start feeling like he's looking for validation of some kind from you, one you didn't wish to provide in fear that he may find this an encouragement. he reaches out for your hand often, something you might find amusing if not for the way his hand trembles.

"are you planning to leave?" nikolai, knowing the fool, must have said something to scare sigma.

"no," you say simply, "not yet."

"so you will leave," sigma frowns. you've seen that look directed to many a clumsy employee and messy files, but never to you. it's almost frightening, "don't you like it here?"

"besides, i..." he stops himself, "dostoevsky won't let you go. and...i don't want you to either. you should stay. we take care of you too, don't we?

unlike most people, you weren't surprised to see bram stoker. though in your memory, he was a lot more...whole and formidable of an opponent. more than that, you remembered him as a man turned into a monster that brought unimaginable destruction because of an ability he never asked for. it was a strange reminder of how much had really changed over the years. now, he seemed sullen, and defeated; it was a depressing sight.

now, he was exhausted. you could tell he didn't want to be here, with the decay of the angel. you could also tell that something was terribly wrong with the sword that was inside him and the pained look in his eyes. fyodor tells you of a kamui when he brings the coffin in, and just by the current state of bram and the utterance of his name, you know already you would not get along with him.

bram doesn't ask you questions, not about why you were here, or what you were doing for all those years. he doesn't explain his situation, and you don't pry. you can put the pieces together by yourself, and when it dawns on you what the kamui planned to do with bram, you realize that there were greater evils than fyodor.

there's a silent solidarity between you and bram, perhaps stemming from being something non-human. you get him the radio he's always wanted, insist that he be allowed to converse with you more often, and so on. these days, bram talks more, and it almost feels like you're talking to an old friend. bram's lived through some, though not most, of the things you have, and he remembers what nobody else does. you wonder, one day, if the two of you could have been friends had you met a lot earlier, and if you hadn't brushed off the news about the vampire ability user the first time. when you voice this out to him, bram has the most adorable reaction. your words make his eyes widen and, stupified, cause him to awkwardly change the topic, fumbling over his next few words.

ah, now you really wish you went to see him earlier.

it's that odd sensation of having a friend, caring for another, that urges you to offer your help to bram. you tell him you can get him out of here, out of the mortal angels' grasp; somewhere safe. you say you can help him regain his former state, help him survive within the shadows of humanity, like you had before. kamui, fyodor, or the doa; nothing will be able to stop you if you really wanted to make it happen, regardless of how complacent you were now.

at the very least, you thought, he might be pleased. grateful. maybe not elated, but, at the very least, relieved. instead, bram looked shocked. you can't tell if the idea horrifies him because he doesn't think you can do it, or because he believes that the decay of the angel was the only connection you had to him. perhaps he thought that saving him, freeing him, would also mean removing yourself from his life. you almost felt bad—you were very likely bram stoker's only friend in his miserable life.

still, you're not quite sure what to think when he extends his stay and starts contemplating, seriously, to cooperate with kamui. you can't wrap your mind around why he'd want to stay, and the possible loss of so many lives as a result unsettles you deeper than it does him, but he's steadfast in his decision. he tells you, with an unfamiliar tinge of scorn, that he was tired of trying to protect people, when all they did was try to kill him.

"if you're so sure, i suppose i'll have to stay here with you." concern weighs heavily on your mind, but more than that, suspicion lingers.

bram smiles, then, and seemingly relaxes in his coffin. an uncomfortable feeling seizes your chest. how had you not noticed?

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shakespearseclipse · 1 year

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Is it chill that you’re in my head?

Summary: Nikolai and y/n have been friends and nothing more. But what happens when the feelings between them change?

Warnings: None

Author’s Note: Hi there! This is my first fanfic (that I’ve posted) and English is not my first language, But I hope you’ll still enjoy this. Oh, and I really don’t know (or care) if this is canon compliant. I might consider writing a second part if anyone is interested. :)

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Nikolai was sparring with Tolya again. Which was nothing out of the ordinary except for one thing: He was shirtless. Unsurprisingly, the number of observers had doubled, young Grisha girls surrounding the lake where the sparring took place. You could only roll your eyes at their obvious stares. Although you had to admit that your best friend was quite nice to look at. Well, that would be an understatement. He looked absolutely marvelous, muscles moving with every movement of his. Everything about your friendship was platonic, but in moments like these, you weren’t sure if you wanted that.

Unfortunately, a group of Etherealki started talking about Nikolai, which didn’t aid your daydreaming to stop.

“Oh, just look at his arms!”

“And his abs.”

You had to hold in a chuckle, it was entertaining to hear these young girls whispering on and on about him. Being completely fixated on the Etherealki’s conversation, you almost missed the wink that Nikolai had thrown you from the sparring ring. Which was a really stupid idea in hindsight, since it caused him to shift his attention from Tolya, which resulted in him barely dodging a punch in the face. Now you couldn’t hold back a chuckle.

“Did you see that? He gave her a wink!”

“She is definitely in love with him!”

“Can you blame her? Who isn’t in love with him?”

It wasn’t the first time you heard people speculating about your friendship with Nikolai, so you had a lot of experience in tuning out these comments. This time however, you couldn’t help but think about a relationship with your best friend. There was no point in denying that he would be an amazing boyfriend. He was funny, attentive, friendly and obviously his good looks wouldn’t pose a problem either. Distracted by your daydreaming, you didn’t notice that the fight had ended.

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The second Nikolai left the sparring ring, he overheard some Grisha men talking about some girl in the audience. He decided to stick around and see who they were fussing about.

“She looks amazing. She should wear this red dress more often.”

“Oh yeah, this dress is amazing.”

“I think I’m going to ask her out today.”

After searching the crowd Nikolai realized that the only girl wearing a red dress was his best friend y/n. He couldn’t help but agree with these men. You did look amazing in that dress. He had never thought about you in any way that was not platonic, but now he felt like he couldn’t shake the idea off. Your hair looked so soft in the sunlight he desperately wanted to touch it. And he didn’t even dare thinking about your lips. His brain told him to stop this staring, but his body wouldn’t turn away. He couldn’t let you go on a date with this guy. The thought alone made want to throw up. But that is normal, no? He was just protective of his friend.

“You can’t ask her out. She’s dating the tsar.”

Usually, Nikolai was not a fan of gossip and rumors, but this one he could let be. If it kept these slimy guys away from you, he was more than happy not to correct them.

“I don’t think she is. Have you ever seen them kiss or hold hands?”

“We could just ask. Excuse me, moi tsar, but there are rumors that you and y/n are dating, are they true?”

Nikolai couldn’t believe this guy. He just asked his king about some rumors. The audacity of this Inferni baffled him. A few seconds passed before Nikolai grumbled an annoyed “No.”

“Great! Thank you moi tsar!”

The Inferni immediately made his way over to you and Nikolai could do nothing but try to burn holes in his back with his looks. Which, surprisingly, did not work.

“What’s gotten you in such a bad mood?” Tamar, who had snuck up behind him asked. Nikolai didn’t respond, so she tried to follow his gaze. The second she realized what was going on, she couldn’t help the laughter that escaped.

“Have you finally acknowledged your feelings for her?”

“I don’t have feelings for her.”

“Sure, moi tsar.”

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Meanwhile, the Inferni called Dmitri had approached you. “Hello y/n.” You greeted him in return. He seemed to be quite nervous, though you couldn’t fathom why.

“Uhm, I wanted to tell you that you look very beautiful today and I wanted to ask you out for a coffee maybe?”

Your gaze fleeted to Nikolai, who was already staring at you. You believed you saw a muscle in his jaw jump. Your eyes drifted back to Dmitri. Maybe a date wasn’t a bad idea. The whole daydreaming about Nikolai today was probably just a result of your practical non-existent love life. Giving Dmitri your sweetest smile, you replied: “Thank you Dmitri, I would love to go on a date with you.”

After deciding the details of your date, you excused yourself and made your way towards your king, who hadn’t moved during your conversation with Dmitri.

“Hello kolya. You seem a little tense.”

When Nikolai finally turned to you, you felt your cheeks starting to burn under his stare. He was close and this proximity didn’t help your heart to slow down. You could feel his own beating just as hard, but you had no idea why. He leaned even closer before whispering in your ear.

“Oh dorogaya, you have no idea.”

Before you could reply, he was stalking away from you. Confused by both his unusual serious behavior and his last statement, you went back to the little palace to get ready for your date later with Dmitri.

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#nikolai x reader #nikolai lantsov #shadow and bone #nikolai lantsov x reader #grishaverse #shadow and bone fanfiction #nikolai fluff #nikolai fanfic

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witchthewriter · 1 year

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𝐇𝐨𝐰 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐒𝐡𝐚𝐝𝐨𝐰 & 𝐁𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐚𝐜𝐭 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐲 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐚 𝐜𝐫𝐮𝐬𝐡 𝐨𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮

⤷ gender neutral, ambiguous race, and any size reader. Requests are open, thank you for reading!

a/n: Minor spoilers, I’ll do my best not to let anything slip!

Warnings: swears (I like to swear I’m sorry)

ᴹᵃˢᵗᵉʳˡᶤˢᵗ

𝑺𝑭𝑾🌿

𝐊𝐚𝐳

・You honestly thought he hated your guts

・Like he truly despised you

・But Kaz saw his feelings as a weakness. He thought he was protecting you by keeping his distance

・It wasn’t until Jesper let something slip, which made you think Kaz might see you in a positive way.

Sitting on a chair and propping his legs on the table, Jesper didn’t even look at you when he said, “Oh he loves you-”

“He what??” Your response cut him off and the sharp-shooter smirked.

“Haven’t you noticed? He’s extra ... Kaz-like when you’re around.”

・From that moment on you thought about every interaction you’ve had with Kaz

・The tight-lipped responses, averting your gaze, but also giving you the easiest part of the jobs, making sure that you had extra protection ...

・You didn’t know it, but Kaz was making sure you were never directly in harms way

・You were never too far away from him

・And when the jobs were too risky, he would pull you out. You thought it was because you weren’t talented enough, but that wasn’t the case at all.

・It was starting to make sense now

𝐀𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐚

・Shy around you, but will blurt out the most random fact? And it doesn’t have anything to do with the conversation

・Always able to spot you out in a crowd

・It’s like some sort of sixth sense, she’s just able to find you

・Uses her sun summoner powers to give you light whenever you need it

・And yeah she might show off a bit ...

・Laughs at all your jokes - even if they aren’t that funny. I guess you could call it pity laughing ...

・Her journals are full of drawings of you. Never shows anyone, and would die of embarrassment if anyone found out.

・Genya was the one to push her to talk to you

・Alina thinks she’ll scare you off with all the attention she’s getting. Everyone thinking she’s a Saint, being the one to tear down the fold, etc.

・So when you agreed to go on a date with her, she didn’t know what to say next.

𝐍𝐢𝐤𝐨𝐥𝐚𝐢

・Amps up the charm, so on the outside he seems so suave, but on the inside he is literally buRNING WITH DESIRE

・Would give you endless gifts, that are extremely expensive

・Like his money advisor would be like “bruh where’s that $$$ gone?”

・Definitely the type to write secret admirer letters

・Always makes sure you have your favourite food. Either stocks it in your room, and says “I do this for all my ... friends” (lie, he doesn’t), or literally carries it on his person “just in case”

・Tolya and Tamar tell him to pursue you, but Nikolai feigns confusion

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” the Prince says, shrugging his shoulders, pretending to read the map in front of him

“Liar,” they both laugh, shaking their heads.

・Okay so with it being very obvious that he has a crush on you, somehow you don’t ... see it?

・Your brain is like, ‘ This Prince of Ravka couldn’t possibly like me. I’m just imagining it.”

・But to be loyal to their captain, Tolya and Tamar keep their mouths shut (although they do try to see if you like him back - and of course you do?????)

𝐈𝐧𝐞𝐣

・You would have absolutely no clue

・So quiet, but somehow ... extra quiet around you?

・Watches you from afar to make sure you’re safe

・Has learned your routine, likes, dislikes and favourite things without saying a word to you

・Feels so protective over you. Kinda like Edward and Bella vibes. Like she thinks you would end up hurting yourself walking down the stairs (because she’s seen you do it)

・You’d notice her because one day you were followed home and she saved you from the thugs

・She introduced herself, as if she was a skilled bystander

・And from then on you kept ‘bumping’ into each other

・Because she knew all your favourite places

・Okay this is starting to sound a lil creepy, but we know Inej has only good intentions. And she would realise how creepy it was getting and stop doing it

・But then you’d notice that you see her less and get a bit sad

・So you seek her out and ask why you haven’t been seeing her as much

・And she kinda ... freezes because she thinks you caught onto her

“...work, you know?”

・You looked away for one second, turned back and she was gone

𝐉𝐞𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐫

・Flirty Mcflirt pants x1000

・Walks up to you confidently, about to say the best pick up line, but then he completely stumbles over his words

・Complains to Inej about how he can be so charming with everyone else but he always messes up around you

・We know Jesper ‘falls in love easily’

・But with you it was different

・His feelings weren’t flimsy; like parchment in water. No, they felt stronger, like a seed in the earth.

・Somehow you became his first priority

・He found himself second-guessing his outfits-

“I’m not sure if I look ... fabulous? Inej, what do you thi- oh she’s gone.”

・But you always compliment him. And one of your compliments is worth a hundred from strangers

・Thinks you can do no wrong, like seriously. Thinks the sun shines out of your as-

“They did NOT do that. Well, if they did good on ‘em!”

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐃𝐚𝐫𝐤𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠

・Longing looks from afar

・Never snappy with you, unlike interactions with other people

・Has memorised your every feature so he can imagine you before he goes to bed

・Would feel confused; is it infatuation? Just a fleeting crush? Lust?

・Or was it something more?

・His heartrenders notice his heart rate picking up whenever you’re around, “sir, are you okay?”

“Yes I’m fine, I’m fine-” he grumbles

・Sneaks you dessert after every meal. You thought he did this for every Grisha, until you asked Zoya how her dessert was one night and she looked at you like you were crazy

“Does that have a hidden meaning?”

“No...?”

・So it’s basically favouratism

・And vERY JEALOUS

・No man is allowed to be alone with you basically

・And no one is allowed to yell, hurt or speak to you in any sort of negative way at all

𝐍𝐢𝐧𝐚

・Is absolutely shameless about it

・Gives the impression that she doesn’t care if you know about her feelings or not.

・But that’s not completely the case.

・Nina is sexually attracted to you - so she would try and pursue you on that front. But once she realised that there was a deeper attraction ... she knew she was fucked

・She’s a whirlwind to be around; constant fast-paced and witty banter

・Shares her food with you, and asks if you want to get food with her (it’s practically always waffles)

・Nina would approach you as another aquaintance - with her flirting. But what really showed her feelings was the food

・Nina didn’t just share food with anyone

・No, absolutely not.

・Only those that she cared very deeply about

・And she doesn’t just ask anyone to go get food with her; because eating is like a sacred experience...

・With the wrong company, it could completely ruin it

・So that’s why she always asks you

𝐌𝐚𝐭𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐚𝐬

・Creates a friendship with you by asking about all your favourite things

・When he first met you, Matthias felt this warm giddy feeling inside

・He thought maybe it was a one off

・But every time you interacted, the same feeling occurred

・He’s quite slow with his advances. One might not even classify them as advances because he’s so ‘old school.’

・He’d be the type who likes to “go steady”

・Matthias is actually pretty good at explaining his emotions and thoughts

・So he’s quite understanding!

・Absolutely wholesome (once his misplaced hatred for Grisha isn’t there anymore...)

・Gentleman; opens doors for you, offers his arm, never lets someone talk over you. And this is before you’re in a relationship

・Never lets people speak negatively towards you or about you

・He has your back 24/7

𝐆𝐞𝐧𝐲𝐚

・Shy!!! But incredibly protective; will tailor someone to have pimples if they talk badly about you

・Tries to get the Darkling to pair you up on quests/tasks

・Mostly gazes at you from afar, sighing every 30 seconds in admiration

・Laughs the loudest whenever you make a joke (or say anything remotely funny) (and then someone nudges her arm, telling her to dial it down)

・Asks about “nonchalantly” with others, basically to see how you’re going. Because she’s too embarrassed to ask you

・Whenever she catches your eye, you give her a smile and her insides burst into butterflies

・Gets sad when you get put on missions that make you have to travel, she misses you dearly

・When her confidence builds, she tells you that whenever you’d need her tailoring skills, she’d be glad to help

・Would do that hand thing in Pride and Prejudice when Mr Darcy holds Elizabeth’s hand and when he’s walking away he like ... flexes it (it’s more romantic on screen, I promise)

・That’s how she’d be, but with only brushing her hand against yours

𝐌𝐚𝐥

・Tries his best to start conversations with you but they’re always so awkward, like he asks you about the weather? And small things like what your favourite colour is, what you think the best meal of the day is etc.

・You thought he was just doing it to be nice, to create some small talk...

・But little did you know this boy was falling HEAD over HEELS in love with you

・The first time he made you laugh, he nearly imploded.

・Your laugh was so refreshing...

・He didn’t think another person could give him so much happiness

・And being the source of your happiness was mind blowing to him. Hearing your laugh was like the weight of the world was lifted off his shoulders

・Thinks about you day and night, fantasising about your life together. Where you would get married, what kind of house you’d live in, how many children etc.

・Literally already having names picked out for your kids

・And when you started talking to him ... as in initiating the conversations - he felt like a king

𝐙𝐨𝐲𝐚

・It was obvious that Zoya liked you - she was never as coldhearted like she was with everyone else

・Almost like she was constantly “going easy” on you

・And then when someone would point it out, she would be twice as mean

・Leaving you completely confused

・But once she ... settled? in her feelings, she started to change

・Like showing off in front of you

・I’m talking, actually asking, “are they looking?” before showing off

・Zoya makes sure no one is talking behind your back

・She will literally tear them to shreds if they insult you. And I’m not over emphasising - she would tear some down utterly and completely, if they messed with you.

・Thinks about you when she’s in bed, how she yearns for your arms to be wrapped around her

・Finds herself daydreaming about you, then snaps back to reality and pretends like nothing happened

・Blushes whenever you’re around, but her bravado turns up tenfold

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sophierequests · 1 year

Note

🌷 not the ghost - send me a link to one of your fics and let me gush over it and point out my favourite lines (fandom doesn't matter, neither does the word count)!

this one pls<3

reading + reacting to my friends' fics // mine...one day - nikolai lantsov

yayy!! a nikolai fic! i love banter and teasing fics, so this was right up my alley today!!

live reaction:

nikolai!!

everyone’s favourite golden boy (and nepo baby, but we’re ignoring that)

i just realised that i am so not ready to see him on screen tomorrow oh god

but anyways, back to the story

swordfighting yes yes yes

flirting while swordfighting - even better

nikolai being annoying <3

nikolai being a simp <333

god, he is down so bad, i can smell it

swordfights are an absolute pain to write, how tf do you make it look so easy djhgd

little shit nikolai is also very much slay

the reader matching his energy >>>

loverboy dhgsdjhgdkjhg

teasing nikolai will always be the best thing to write and read

jdhgljhgskhgjdsfhgjdsf a kiss to the cheek

my favourite lines:

“No. I’m tired so I’m going to do this lovely thing you might’ve heard of called rest.” The blonde hummed as if thinking, “Never heard of it so you must be lying.”

-> 'rest' isn't in nikolai's vocabulary

Nikolai watched her as she let the door close behind her and sighed to himself, shaking his head with a lovestruck smile. “That girl… She’ll be mine.” The reminder of how stubborn she was flashed in his mind. “One day.”

-> simp

Y/N sighed as she slid her blade up to press against his neck, “You’re going easy on me.” A smirk appeared on his lips, “I thought maybe if you win you’d finally agree to go out with me.” She scoffed and leaned closer to him, “I’ll agree to go out with you once I win fairly. Don’t start treating me differently now, Lantsov.” A spark of competitive fire flared in Nikolai’s chest, “Alright, Y/L/N. Just know we may never go out then.”

-> simp part two

Y/N smiled, “Nuhuh… I never said when I’d go out with you.” She spun on her heel and went to put the sword up, leaving the taller of the two to stare at her with a slack jaw.

-> and i oop-

Her lady-in-waiting hid her smile of amusement as she scurried behind, her voice quiet, “Yes, M’lady.”

-> maria's internal monologue: get fucked

Tomorrow morning seemed like the perfect time to surprise him with breakfast. He can wait a few hours more.

my god jkhgsadll

final review:

AMAZING AS ALWAYS!! the banter was just *mwuah* chef's kiss!! i loved the swordfighting bits (maybe because i can't write swordfighting for the life of me but still)!! and i'm a huge sucker for fucking with nikolai so this was perfect

#— el 🎻#my lovely moots #nikolai lanstov x reader

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waldensblog · 1 year

Text

Reading Siege and Storm

So since I got into his fandom via the show first, I had decided to wait until I watched season 2 before reading Siege and Storm (and Ruin and Rising). I’ve seen the show, posted about my thoughts, etc. so now it’s time for my book reactions:

Below the cut is the full extent of my thoughts, but here’s the TL;DR: I like seeing Alina progress towards a more ruthless and morally grey character as she becomes more and more like the Darkling; I wish the Darkling was in the book more, but enjoyed the tether scenes I got (and chapel kiss) and still ship Darklina even where I don’t always like his actions; I liked what Nikolai brought to the narrative and ship Nikolina too; I see a lot of Darkolai/Darknikolina potential in this narrative and the books are further fueling this; I dislike Mal.

Alina: As in the first book, Alina frustrated me at the beginning, as she drags herself around, feeling like she is “useless Alina”, growing weaker and sicker, all the while pretending she’s happy, and then later, when she literally begs Nikolai to rescue her from the Darkling, she ends up concluding the chapter with something like “What have we gotten ourselves into?” smh. She’s definitely at her best when she’s at the Little Palace again - sleeping in the Darkling’s bed, taking his job as leader of the Second Army, growing more and more like him while flirting with Nikolai (Oh the Darknikolina of it all). I love seeing this change, this progression. She is definitely a reluctant hero, and honestly, a bit of an unreliable narrator when it comes to her own feelings and thoughts - particularly when it comes to Mal. I like that she isn’t a traditional hero though - she’s getting more and more grey, as she is tempted to be more ruthless to enact change, and I like that she recognizes it too - that she did abandon those people on the skiff to die, that she did nearly murder someone with the Cut for a slight. The Darkling: I wish there was more Darkling in this book. He was prominent in the beginning after catching up to Alina, but then his role is severely reduced and he pops up here and there in the tether (until the end) - probably to make room for Nikolai to get into Alina’s heart, just as the Darkling did in the first book. It’s obvious that Alina still very much has feelings for him - at the beginning she says she’s having nightmares, but her description of her being happy there, using her powers, and his lips on her neck suggest otherwise. Every time they touch there’s a sensation that goes through them both, a powerful attraction they can’t seem to shake. And the tether shows how she longs for him - he can’t be there otherwise. I think he very much hates that he loves her, and I think she’s stuck in the same place. They don’t want it to be true, but they are soulmates. That chapel kiss at the end really seals that to me - the way she describes it, it’s a longing she didn’t have with the others. They are eternal, each other’s balance, and honestly their breakup is becoming everyone’s problem. Throughout this book, she is becoming more and more like him. There was a very Darkolai bit for me in the book too where after Vasily proposes to Alina, she wonders if the Darkling had to fend off nobles and proposals too - which of course, put in my mind the image of Nikolai proposing to the Darkling to form an alliance and coup the throne. Oh the possibilities... It probably goes without saying, but I don’t agree with 100% of his actions. He is still my favourite though. Nikolai: Nikolai is a fantastic addition to the narrative, and as in the show, I love what he brings to the dynamic, especially when it comes to the Darkling/Alina and him. My dude literally decided to shoot the Darkling and jump ship like a madman. Wild. It probably goes without saying that I don’t agree with his actions 100% of the time, but overall, I do enjoy his character, and it’s obvious that Alina gets feelings for him as the book progresses and they spend more time together. What I like about they dynamic is that she’s actually happy when in his company most of the time, and we hit a point where she clearly wants to kiss him (she says so herself). I couldn’t help but notice that the Darkling never appears to Alina when she’s with Nikolai after that initial time in the fold. So I think her feelings for Nikolai are strong enough to keep the Darkling at bay. And if we’re on the Darkolai/Darknikolina theme... she compares him to the Darkling a few times.

Mal: So I definitely dislike Mal. At his best he’s kind of just there, and at his worst he’s actively dragging Alina down or being a sullen grumpy drunk. When they were in Novyi Zem, he was at his happiest, apparently (as he says later in the book). But when in Novyi Zem, he’s working a labouring job, day in day out, while Alina grows sicker and weaker, and he thinks that was “doing something worthwhile” - because apparently being at the Palace, working on building alliances, an army, etc. is absolutely nothing. Literally no fucks given for the state of his country, like he brings nothing to the table and only takes. Honestly I’m reading him as like a drug to Alina - he’s actively bad for her, when she’s with him she often gets sicker, weaker, and is blatantly unhappy despite her insistence that it’s not the case. She’s co-dependent on him, and there’s a fair few times I read her “love” for him as not actually love at all - but as an addiction. Knowing from the show he’s the firebird - that can also probably explain the addiction, as she is actively growing power-hungry. I also noticed - and evidently, so did the Darkling, but the Darkling appears when she’s with Mal or alone - meaning he isn’t keeping the loneliness at bay, he isn’t “home” like she claims, and I’m not sure her feelings for Mal are all that genuine - the Darkling wouldn’t be there if they were, right? Mostly, I just wish he would just leave the narrative altogether.

#Grishaverse #Siege and Storm #darklina #Nikolina #darknikolina #darkolai #anti malina #anti malyen oretsev #anti mal oretsev

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atrodonna · 2 years

Note

You seem really neat :) Do you have any personal headcanons, thoughts, theories, etc. about Nikolai?

Oh! Well, thank you! To be complimented and asked for my thoughts about something with your extraordinary talent is… surreal. Your writing is incredibly admirable. But, anyways, thank you!

As for Nikolai…

I don’t really have many headcanons for him, as I try to think more about the characters’ more… evidently, or at least with what I can comprehend from the author’s display of them. I only have this:

- is currently looking for someone to “surprise” with his magic tricks since Fyodor just shrugs them off or stares with no reaction whatsoever. He doesn’t mind that too much though

- actually very calm and quiet when he is by himself; more room to ponder, y’know?

- likely sews his own clothes

- poor thing laughs at his own jokes; no one else finds them funny or even fit for the comedic genre.

- hit him with one good logical argument as into why his idea of freedom is complete bogus and he will start pulling at any particular string of fact he knows to protect his own insecurity. In a goofy, silly manner…

- wants to be understood more than anything, as we have already seen

- alone and homeless as a child… maybe

- ask him if Fyodor is a good person and he’ll stop, stare and then start: “Sure!”

- very sensitive. Not as much as Fyodor but still pretty sensitive

Now my opinions on his character…ah, I have so much to say still, I’ll keep it to the point. I see him as a much more interesting version of Dazai, with a little more unique depth to his soul.

He saddens me a lot, because seeing the glimpse of his true personality and how wonderful of a man he is, it hurts for me to know that those are the very things he hates the most about himself. His whole “doing out of spite” motif is also destructive, for him and for others, but mainly him, I’d argue; in that sense, he’s a lot like Fyodor: they both hate the world and seek means to amend it, either through themselves or through others. I also don’t think he knows what it truly means to be a monster…

I also see a lot of underlying hints toward a belief that Nikolai worships Fyodor and yet, I don’t think I can agree with that. Attached is the word I would prefer. I also think that both of them are terrible friends but please, by no means think that I do not appreciate their connection to one another; rather, I’m envious they could still find one another and form a bond despite their current situations.

Honestly, anything I would have analyzed or theorized has already been said, and I don’t believe in a “new” way when the correct one has already been found so… yeah! :)

Sorrow is ripping him apart, however. Nikolai is not a very self-aware person either, as some think he is - though he is definitely more “aware” of his existence than most, the fact he wants to be rid of himself is much more proof that he never fully understood what being a “self” even is. He’s placed himself in a paradox only because he is not willing to love and allow himself to see the strengths in his humanity, so he resolves to burn it. This is not the way to go about it, and the methods he chose to “kill” those feelings in Meursault is even more disgraceful and wicked than anything else he has done before; that is where his true “monster” lies. He’s my purest source of sunshine and happiness though, and I would protect this sweet little guy from anything.

I think that’s all. I do hope to explore his character more in my writing, though, so this may not even be all I think I feel about him. Thank you so much for your interest, dear! Best regards!

#fyodor dostoevsky #fyodor bsd #bsd #bungou stray dogs #nikolai gogol #bsd manga #dazai osamu #dazai bsd #kafka asagiri #bsd gogol

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stargazer-sims · 1 year

Text

The Biellmann Spin

Eden: I've been thinking.

Nikolai: About what?

Eden: My long program. I think I want to add a Biellmann spin in there somewhere.

Nikolai: Can you even do a Biellmann?

Eden: What do you mean, can I do a Biellmann? If I couldn't do it, why would I be asking to add it to my free skate?

Nikolai: You see that more in women's skating. You know, most guys can't do it, mostly because they're not flexible enough. I know I never could.

Eden: Just because you can't, that doesn't mean I can't. But, more importantly, I'm betting none of my closest competitors can, either.

Nikolai: I wouldn't bet on little Maxim Sidorov not being able to do it. He's the one I've been watching the closest this season. Him, and Sebastian Fujikawa.

Eden: Sebastian? You're joking, right? He's nowhere near me and Max. Oh, and the American guy Luka Coleman, too. You know, the backflip guy? It's going to be the three of us on the podium in Kyoto.

Nikolai: You think?

Eden: You have watched Sebastian in practice, right?

Nikolai: You know I have. Have you?

Eden: Yeah, and he sucks.

Nikolai: No, he doesn't. He's uninspired. There's a difference.

Eden: Yeah?

Nikolai: Yeah. Tell me something. Why do you skate?

Eden: You know why.

Nikolai: Humour me.

Eden: Because skating is awesome. I love how it makes me feel, and I like learning new skills, and I really like to compete. Not just against other people, but like, against myself. You know what I mean? Like, I always want to be better. But mostly, I do it because it's fun.

Nikolai: Right, and that's a big part of why you do so well. Look at your last competition, when you were with Mr. Nishijima. Were you having fun?

Eden: No. I was too stressed out to have fun.

Nikolai: And you performed really poorly because of that, didn't you? I think that's part of Sebastian's problem, too.

Eden: You mean, he's scared of his coach? But, that doesn't make sense. I've seen them together, and I'm pretty sure they love each other as much as you and I do. I heard they’ve been together even longer than us, too.

Nikolai: No, that's not what I mean. I don't think his relationship with his coach is the issue, but he does seem really stressed out and like he's not enjoying himself. He's got talent, though, and if he ever finds his spark, he'll be a serious contender.

Eden: A contender who can do a Biellmann spin?

Nikolai: *laughing* You're determined to keep coming back to that, aren't you?

Eden: Can I put it in my long program, or not?

Nikolai: Show me. We'll decide after.

Eden: Kolya, look! I told you I can do it!

Nikolai: Yes!

Eden: Did you love it? Was I amazing?

Nikolai: You’re always amazing, my sunshine. You keep surprising me all the time.

Eden: I like surprising you.

Nikolai: I know you do.

Eden: So, do you like my Biellmann?

Nikolai: I do, but I want to know who taught it to you.

Eden: Actually, it was videos on the internet. I saw a bunch of videos of Ginger doing it, and I even found one of Anya in some competition. She was super hot back in the day, by the way.

Nikolai: What are you talking about, back in the day? Anya’s still super hot.

Eden: Matter of personal opinion, I guess. I’m more into cute dark-haired boys than sultry blondes at the moment. Still, she had skills, although I don’t think she was as good as Ginger.

Nikolai: Ginger’s medals would agree with you. If you taught yourself by watching videos of her doing a Biellmann spin, you were learning from one of the best. What I want to know, though, is how you practiced it without me knowing.

Eden: Can I make a confession?

Nikolai: Yes, I think I’ll definitely need to hear it.

Eden: That was the first time I've ever done it on the ice.

Nikolai: What?

Eden: I practised all the movements at the dance studio, and I tried it on rollerblades a few times, but I've never actually skated it until just now.

Nikolai: That's... impressive.

Eden: So, can I add it? Please?

Nikolai: Why don't you practice it some more today? If I'm happy with how it's shaping up, we can take a look at the choreography tomorrow. Sound fair?

Eden: Yeah, that's fair.

Nikolai: All right, let's see it again. If we're adding a new element last-minute, you need to be a hundred percent confident about doing it in competition. It's one thing to show off for me, but it's a whole other thing when the judges are watching.

Eden: Don't worry. By the time we get to Kyoto, I'm going to make it look easy.

#ts4 #sims 4 #eagames #snowy escape #sugar valentine #eden seong #nikolai pavlenko #wearesugarvalentine #stargazersims

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stinkyme · 1 year

Note

Imma catch up reading you asks in a sec cuz listen I saw someone say subby men and I wanna be included in this conversation but I’ve been thinking about this all day: Ranpo and Nikolai are the only 2 characters I feel like would actively prefer (not saying other characters don’t like it) having a plus sized s/o. Both because they’d just be like “soft, squishy, warm” all the time

I hope you will enjoy them hehe :D switch/subby men are the best men :3

but I agree with you definitely!! Nikolai is really like a big man, I mean look at his sexy hot juicy hot thighs in manga i am drooling rn as i think about it and in general I think he would be really attracted to plus sized person (not in fetishizing way, but in a way where he would love cuddling with them and being as you said all soft, squishy and warm and just let them rest between his thighs or vice versa and lay on their tummy) and same goes for Ranpo!! I think he would love that, especially he is kind of a tiny man, not in a bad manner, just look at him next to Poe or anyone else and he would definitely enjoy having someone to just rest on and wrap around them and he would definitely be the type to kind of squeeze the tummy and kiss it or bite it and/or bite thighs and call it his personal soft, squishy pillow aaaaa sjsnsjsjbs I love them so much :") he would also love to be carried in piggyback manner ansjsjsjsj MY MIND IS SO SOFT RN

and they are definitely not the only ones!! I can also see Atsushi being attracted to them and just feeling so safe and cuddly and aaaaaa my little boy

#stinkyanswers #my sweet death <3 #I AM SO SJSJSJ I LOVE THEM SO MUCH #THEY ARE SO CUTE AND I CANT #THIS IS REAL ASAGIRI TOLD ME I SWEAR

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the-al-chemist · 1 year

Note

Hiii! How are you? For the unusual fic ask:

BTS for the last chapter of learning to fly, perhaps?

Hi there lovely! 💛 I’m doing really well, thank you! I hope things are well with you 🥰

Onto your ask: BEHIND THE SCENES OF LANDING (LtF C7) - cut below for spoilers

Unusual writer’s asks game is here!

“Enter!”

Charlie pushed open the wooden door of Magda’s office and walked in, Dragon at his heels. Magda was scribbling furiously on a sheet of parchment and didn’t even look up as Charlie walked over to her desk and sat down opposite her.

Magda is my favourite of my minor characters. She is loosely based on a lady I worked for as a waitress in my teens. She terrified me, but she got shit done. We should all aspire to be a little bit more Magda from time to time.

“I’m surprised you even agreed to it, to be honest.”

“I am surprised, also. But your friend, the one who is helping to set up these challenges, she is very persuasive. And I think she cares about the dragons, also.”

“She is, and she does.”

“I liked her much more than I expected to.”

Charlie laughed gently. He knew all about that.

“She’s got a way of doing that,” he said, and Magda’s eyebrows shot upwards.

“You should say something to her, Charlie,” she told him, her voice stern.

All my HP stories exist in a continuum with canon stories and each other. This means that there are lots of references to events from other stories in them. This originally reference Y4 of the HP books, and now the Wilderness Years references this scene (or leads into it, I should say). People who speak Romanian or decided to go and translate Magda’s words to Charlie that Artemis didn’t understand (there were a lot of them, actually - yourself included!) will already know that Charlie knows that Magda knows that he knows about his feelings for Artemis. I think the only person in this situation who doesn’t know anything is Artemis, which is ironic considering that she is the Legilimens.

Maybe if things were different she would feel the same way about me as I do about her. If we’d met at a different time or… I don’t know.”

“In another life, maybe.”

“Maybe. But as it is, she sees me as a brother or a best friend. I’m not going to take either of those things away from her. I can’t do that to her.”

Aye, there’s the rub. This is the moment this whole story built towards, not Charlie’s realisation, but this. Learning To Fly was written as a canon retelling of the Rockstar AU, where in another life, where things are different, Artemis does feel the same way about Charlie as he does for her, but in this life he no longer harbours romantic feelings in return. In both universes, one has made the decision to keep their feelings a secret for the benefit of the other and for their friendship. Which I, being the sad Brit I am, really love. The line about the best friend and the brother broke my heart in the best possible way.

The door to Magda’s office flew open, and Dragon the Crup began to bark loudly at the newcomer: Nikolai, one of the newest dragonologists on the reserve, only eighteen years old and barely six months out of school.

Back to dragonology, here comes Nikolai, whose name matters less than the fact that he has come to act as a foil to Charlie and show you as a reader how far Charlie has come since the start of the story, when he was in Nikolai’s position.

“Incendio,” he whispered, setting one half of the nest alight. He stamped out the flames, and crouched down to move the three hatchlings onto the warm embers. “Here you go, look. Nice and toasty. Just stay there a minute.”

He turned his attention back to the fourth egg, picking it up and finding the weak point where the hole had appeared at the apex. Hoping that it wasn’t too late, he prised open the shell, freeing the lifeless baby dragon inside. He placed the tip of his index finger under the hatchling’s tail.

It had a pulse.

He opened the baby dragon’s mouth, and saw that it was filled with fluid. No longer caring about his own dignity, he placed his lips to the hatchling’s face and sucked the fluid away, clearing its airways so that it could breathe. He placed it next to its siblings on the embers, where it began to stir, stimulated by the movement of the others in the clutch. Charlie smiled. They were alive. All four of them were alive.

All the dragon husbandry, anatomy, physiology and behaviour is based on that of real life animals, particularly birds, reptiles, and wolves. In this situation, warmth and clearing airways is exactly what’s needed for neonates. The emphasis on keeping the dragons warm is based on my own headcanon that dragons are cold-blooded like other reptiles, and that the fire they breath is actually used to keep them warm internally, not just for defence/attack. This young, the dragonlings wouldn’t have developed the anatomy to produce their own fire and need an external heat source to warm their own bodies.

But the flames never came. Instead of burning him alive, the dragon merely snorted. Charlie frowned, and the dragon snorted again. He opened his eyes and looked at her.

“Norbert?”

You wouldn’t believe the number of times I got comments from people whilst publishing the story to say “you do know this dragon is female, right?”. Yes, I do know that, actually. But Charlie doesn’t, not yet, anyway. And there is a reason for that.

This is why Norbert(a)’s true self wasn’t revealed yet - this unexpected reunion. Also, I love the idea that Charlie has become so capable and knowledgable, but even he made the basic error of not checking whether the dragon was actually male or not. It happens a lot in real life (you’d be surprised).

Before he flew back home, he turned back to take one last look at the small family of dragons, huddled together in the cave.

“Goodbye, Norberta,” said Charlie.

And this time, he meant it.

I could have gone for some big flowery description of scenery or feelings or morality, but I didn’t. This story and the characters in it don’t suit that. This is a simple story of finding and making your way in life. Charlie and Norberta have helped each other to do that, and now the part of their journey that they have shared is over. It’s time for them both to go home. The end.

*the above gif isn’t mine, I found it on google! If anyone knows it’s theirs, let me know so I can credit you!*

#al speaks #writing asks #learning to fly #BTS #directors cut #harry potter fanfiction #charlie weasley #norbert #norberta

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stephanythedramaqueen · 3 years

Text

Here’s the thing because I cannot believe Alina would just willingly throw her support into the Lantsov monarchy. If Alexander III hadn’t sexually abused Genya, Alina wouldn’t have any personal beef with him. Despite the fact that the Old King would still exploit the Grisha while being a bigot to Alina’s FACE!

“It is my word against hers,” the King said, waving his finger at Genya. “I am a King—“

I stepped between them. “And I am a Saint. Shall we see whose word carries more weight?”

“You shut your mouth, you grotesque little witch. I should have had you killed when I had the chance.”

It honestly says it all. He sees them as witches, he sees them as a thing to be used and he insults Alina in the presence of everyone!

And the worst part is that none of Alina’s inner monologue reflects on that. She doesn’t note how he generalizes all Grisha into witches and sub-human. She doesn’t come back to the fact that his bigotry is very much alive and well and he’s the effing king. The head of the state that dictates much of which decrees passes into law is a bigoted fool. And she doesn’t want to kill him? Blames the Darkling for ever making moves against this piece of trash and all his line? Aleksander was right!!! this motherfucker and all his ilk deserves to choke.

And yeah, I’m sorrry to say, Nikolai too.

I obviously I don’t think he’s trash or bigoted at all like his father. But he stood by and watched his father call Alina a witch without defending her from this particular discrimination, or at all try to change his father’s mindset about Grisha as a whole. It wouldn’t change the Old King’s ways of course, but the point is that I wanted to see Nikolai stand up for the Grisha in the moment that it mattered the most, not whispered promises and ideals behind closed doors.

And this is exactly why I think he’s pretentious and trivializes the Grisha plight if only if it is for his own ambition to rule.

The monarchy was trash. The Darkling was right. And Alina couldn’t care less about the crisis of the socio-political situation her kind are living in. If Aleksander wasn’t so lonely and craved to end his solitude with his immortal equal that is the Sun Summoner, he would have had much more success in making the country safe for his people.

#I cannot stress you enough how much I do NOT want Nikolai as king. Dark Tsar Aleksander forever leggo #shadow and bone #I like Nikolai. I love Nikolai. I just don’t agree with him being the best choice to rule Ravka as it is rn #neither is Zoya but that’s neither here nor there #anti-Leigh bardugo #rambling about ruin and rising

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lantsovsupremacist · 3 years

Note

i saw that you asked for requests and i also saw that you wrote some nikolai stories based on taylor's songs (i loved). so you could write something based on wilders dreams or you are in love or call it what you want, you choose pls

MY BRAND yes of course i can.

nikolai lantsov: you are in love

and you understand now why they lost their minds and fought the wars...

“marry me.”

you shook your head. while any other girl would likely collapse onto the cobblestones had they the pleasure of hearing those words from the king, you would not. you could not. the possibility of accepting his proposal was a lie you no longer could afford.

“i have a certain inclination to your use of words, darling,” nikolai caught up to your strides easily, “without them, you answers are so very unclear.”

you stopped your pace, shutting your eyes. obviously, nikolai only meant to try and persuade you of his reasoning. he was unaware of how the repetition further shattered the pieces of your heart.

“stop asking,” you requested unevenly, “i cannot marry you because i cannot be a queen.”

“cannot or will not?” nikolai dropped his calm disposition. his words now swam through endless seas of exasperation.

eyes widening at his assumption, you glared, “your people will not accept a grisha on the throne. they will not make an exception for love because they cannot understand how such a thing between you and i could exist.”

albeit offended, nikokai softened, “and i wish i could do more to protect you but even i am unable to offer you reprieve from your own doubts.”

however bold or brash his words seemed, you took them because there was no other conceivable explanation. you refused to argue with him further, not when your remaining moments were already beginning to slip away.

“you have too much hope in the world.”

nikolai scoffed, knocking his shoulder into yours. you saw through his sly smirk and glowing grin, and he knew it. the fox could hide away from just about anybody but never you—not that he ever wanted to.

so, he would pretend for a minute or two, rile you up with his plethora of personalities. then, he would sober up, resounded to your ability to penetrate his defenses. your keen awareness of every notch in his armor, every foothold to climb his fortress, both aggravated and comforted him simultaneously.

“somebody has to,” he chided you, content to snake an arm around your waist and pull you flush against his side, “i don’t want to forget.”

“forget what?” you questioned, turning to face him more fully as a soft pout formed on your features.

“that i have this,” he motioned to your entwined limbs, “you,” he kissed your forehead, “to come back to. i only ever hoped my heart would find its home.”

you stilled. surely, an artist from above could have captured the moment perfectly because of it. they would have to gently shade your individual silhouettes into one, execute the softness of his gaze, and reproduce the muted lighting with watercolor.

you liked to organize your life into two categories; there was the before nikolai lantsov and the after him. before saltwater became the first thing to invade your senses in the mornings, you would have set fire to the bridge of any desperate man’s creation. after you learned to never assume anything impossible, you willingly gave up a piece of your heart to the most lovesick of them all. the one you simply could not have.

gingerly grabbing ahold of his fingers, you aimed to kiss the tip of each one. as always, he pulled away before allowing you to complete your objective. with a frown, you ran your thumb over his cheek.

“i only got to six. none of that,” you minded him with a calm look, “sobachka,” you began to warn him.

“it’s more than five,” he commented with a reference to the day before. quickly, he kissed you to remove any possibility of a retort. you could not escape his lips even if you intended to try, which you did not.

the need for air ultimately pulled you away from nikolai. you frowned discontentedly his way, still frustrated by his actions. you understood his insecurities and accepted the validity of his feelings, but it did not ease the pain of watching him crumble before your eyes.

“my love,” you urged, “i have never understood many things and ended up running,” you held him off with a look, “but i want to stay and learn every part of you.”

bashful, he tucked his head into your neck.

“you have to spare some hope for yourself,” you said softly, leaning your head onto his.

he groaned, indicative of him sourly acknowledging your truth. you turned to kiss his temple, giving your lips the respite to linger just beneath his curls. you sucked in a breath when he responded with one of his own, planted upon the column of your throat. tender yet unexpected.

“but i want you to have it,” he responded, careful to inject the appropriate dose of his personality to make you smile without doubt of his sincerity being a means of withdrawal from the subject.

rolling your lips into your mouth, you melted under his gaze and into his arms, “okay.”

he smiled as radiantly as the sun, with a blush to match the artistry of it setting. you thought you could stay in that moment with him, that not even he could carry you to the next quite yet. you should have known better to predict his unpredictable behavior.

“so,” he drew out, “marry me, then.”

“nik-,” you breathed, fighting a losing battle with a smile of your own. his persistence did not force you to agree, rather charmed you to.

“no!” he cut off deliberately, “no,” the delivery of his words now intentionally softer.

“nikolai,” you enunciated, “if i’m a queen,” you caught the exact second light filtered back into his eyes, “i will never have you again in the same way—not how i do now, at least.”

“i don’t understand,” he frowned between his mumble of the phrase.

“we will be closer than ever before,” you voiced, “but i fear that could push us further apart than we have ever been,” you expressed with a sunken tone.

not letting you pull away either emotionally or physically, he took you into his arms. already feeling more grounded, you breathed in his scent of sea and pine. he was all around you, and it was enough.

“i could never not love you,” he countered.

“that’s not what i’m saying,” you refuted, “but what if you don’t like me anymore? after we are stressed and overwhelmed and stubbornly disagreeing?”

nikolai giggled, kissing every inch of your face, “i like every single piece of you,” his thumbs slipped down your cheeks and onto your throat, pushing your head back for further access, “i like you more than any travel i have been on, any adventure i have sought, and more than any squabble we might face.”

looking up at him under a thick set of eyelashes, you quirked a crooked smile, “really?”

“oh, yes,” he divulged, “i like you more than anyone else—even myself,” he began to taunt you, “and i happen to like myself quite a bit.”

“fine,” you relented with a light sigh, “let me show you just how much i like you and i’ll be your queen.”

a smirk stretched across his face but before he could dip his head to yours, you grabbed his hands away from your neck.

“i like you,” you began with a breath, leaning forward to kiss each of his fingertips, “one, two, three,” you continued as he watched you delicately, “eight, nine, ten.”

blinking rapidly, his gaze softened, “don’t be my queen,” nikolai mouthed, a single breath away from your lips, “continue to be my best friend, the woman i look for in every room, the reason time moves way too fast.”

“thank you for sharing your hope with me,” you spoke and drew your lips in a straight line, “thank you for letting me be in love with you.”

“i never let you do anything,” he began to sway, “could only hope you would keep coming back.”

“i’m in love with you,” you insisted, “and i happen to like that very much.”

#nikolai lantsov imagine #zoya nazyanelsky #nikolai lantsov fluff #nikolai lanstov imagines #nikolai lanstov x reader #nikolai x reader #nikolai lantsov #shadow and bone fic #shadow and bone #grisha netflix #the grisha series #grishaverse #ruin and rising #siege and storm #genya safin #rule of wolves

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clairecrive · 3 years

Note

Heyy:) can you write Nikolai x tidemaker reader, while Nikolai is still Sturmhond and the reader is part of the crew. Nikolai fell in love at first sight but the reader is a little introvert, but she snaps one day and confesses her love to him.

Sorry English isn’t my first language:)

Stars in the night

a/n: Hi hun sorry for the long wait. it's a bit shitty but I hope you're still around and like this x

warnings: none, fluff

word count: 2.8K

tags: @jupiterandbutterflies, @agentsofsheilds , @for-bebbanburg , @randomoutsiders , @pansysgirlfriend, @hannaxmaria , @vintagebitc , @story-scribbler , @crowssixof , @odetostep , @lizzie-he4rts, @korol-lantsov, @subjecta13-thefangirl,@gallysonegoodlung, @a-c-lee, @mriddlemethis, @carnationworld, @thanossexual, @luvxginger, @sanna2020, @partiesandblurrypolaroids, @edithsvoice, @wafflesandschemingfaces, @snugleo, @sugarmelonwater (tag list form)

SHADOW AND BONE MASTERLIST

Nights were usually y/n’s favourite time of the day. Chaos and shouts left place to eerie silence and the comforting quietness of the stars. Being on a ship meant always having people around whether they were shouting or singing or playing or whatever.

Y/n didn’t mind their company per se, it’s just that sometimes, people’s presence can get too much. But whenever she felt overwhelmed, she knew she could count on the stars to anchor her and help her breathe.

After an exhausting day at sea, no one refused the possibility to sleep and recharge. So, more often than not, y/n didn’t have any trouble in taking the night shift. It actually made her even more popular with the rest of the crew.

The crew’s captain was another thing. Y/n hadn’t a precise idea on him simply because he was always up to something. Sitting still was not in his blood, even where there were no chores to attend to. If there wasn’t something to do, Sturmhond would create it.

He was such at antipodes with y/n’s personality that their interactions were limited to her assignments, her report after her shift or him updating her about his plans. Or rather- her role in them. Y/n wasn’t foolish enough to think that he really made her part of his plans. And to be fair, y/n never asked more than what directly concerned her. Maybe that was why Sturmhond was so interested in her.

There was nothing subtle about the man. From the way he walked like he owned the world, to his shiny red hair. So, when he unusually started to roam around her just because, y/n did notice. Hell, everyone on the ship noticed. It was hard not to in such a limited space.

However, y/n thought nothing of it. It was just him being his extravagant self. Nothing new, honestly. She did not mind it either. The man had a way of being there without being overbearing, which was more than y/n could say about any other men she had met. Well, all except Tolya, of course.

He had started by bidding her good morning and goodnight every day. Then he would come to find her throughout the day, to chitchat above all things. To y/n’s horror, the privateer didn’t desist. He kept coming and y/n honestly didn’t know how to react.

She had always found him quite handsome and charming, but there was something she was absolutely shit at: small talk. And the man wanted exactly that from her. Alas, it all ended up with Sturmond’s voice filling the awkward pauses and y/n barely answering his questions.

She knew in her heart that she was giving him the wrong impression and she feared that her awkwardness would be mistaken for coldness making him eventually desist. Despite her fears though, the man didn’t seem off-put by her behaviour. He kept coming and coming but that didn’t ease y/n in any capacity.

Then one night, he stopped beating around the bush. It didn’t exactly catch her by surprise, y/n knew him, it was only a matter of time before he came out with it. It wasn’t in his nature to be discreet. Or so she thought, based on what she saw.

“Why did you want to be part of my crew? You don’t seem to like me,” he wondered, his green eyes shining in the moonlight.

Despite the words that left his mouth, y/n knew what his question implied. What he was really asking. But however powerful she might be, y/n didn’t have the guts to be upfront with him. Not even with the comforting presence of the stars as their witnesses.

If only he knew.

She knew that this could potentially be a chance for her to test the waters, to see what his intentions were and to make her clear. But alas, she knew nothing about flirting. Deflecting it is, then.

“Tolya and Tamar trust you. I trust them with my life so,” she shrugged, tacitly implying that she somewhat trusted him too.

“I see. So not only do I owe them my life but also an incredible crew.”

“The big and mighty Sturmhond praising someone other than himself?”

“I only sing praise when they’re due.”

“And, of course, no one deserves it more than yourself.”

“Well, you said it darling.” He flashed her a dazzling smile that made the moonlight pale.

Y/n rolled her eyes a bit to convey her annoyance and a bit to avoid him seeing the blush rising on her cheeks.

Truth be told, Tolya and Tamar weren’t the only ones that persuaded her from becoming a part of his crew albeit they were a big part of it. She wasn’t lying when she told him that she trusted them with her life. If it wasn’t for them, y/n would probably be a soulless machine right now. Her body on the outside but really nothing that made her y/n on the inside. That’s what happened to Grisha in Shu Han.

She owed the twin everything but that wasn’t why she made the decision to join them on the Volkovny. They didn’t force her to follow them or anything. And y/n couldn’t deny that Sturmhond’s handsome face didn’t make her sway a little in her decision. That was, however, something slippery about the privateer. It didn’t make him untrustworthy per se, but it certainly made her wary about trusting him.

The biggest push that prompted her to the Volkovny and life on the sea was her experience in Shu Han. Being Grisha meant not having a safe place outside of Ravka and sometimes in Ravka as well. Her home country was war-torn and as much as y/n had been trained to be a soldier all her life, she didn’t feel ready to take part in a fight that she didn’t feel her own.

Despite his unorthodox methods, General Kirigan’s sole purpose had always been making Grisha safe. And seeing as she had seen first-hand how the world treated Grisha, y/n could really get behind his plot, not caring about how bloody it was.

Life on the sea meant no more persecutors. Outside of her crew, no one in the ports they sailed to knew she was Grisha. Not that she was ashamed of who she was, but it’d be like having a mark on her skin if people knew. A mark that made her unsafe. She craved a life where she didn’t have to constantly watch her back. And being on the Volkovny granted her wish.

Not that it was a safe lifestyle, of course. But y/n was a survivor. If she had come out of the keirgud alive, she could well out best every threat that she will eventually cross on the sea. Besides, she knew that the twins had her back. And, in a small percentage, so did Sturmhond.

She and the captain didn’t exactly have a relationship, not like the twins have. She wasn’t his confidante or anything and she preferred to spend her time on her own -as much as life on deck allowed her- but since she was such in close quarters with the twins, that definitely made her closer to him than the rest of the crew. Not to mention that now the captain had started spending his nights with her too.

Well, not all night and not every night but it was a substantial increase in his time spent with her. Sure, it was all parts of him doing his rounds at night and being his amiable self.

So why the hell did her breath hitch whenever she caught his silhouette approaching? She hated herself for feeling like this. And him. Only that she didn’t, not really. It wasn’t his fault, was it? It was just her being silly. It’ll pass, sooner or later.

Only that, of course, it didn’t. In fact, it got even worse. If before she could manage their interaction by playing aloof and uninterested, it has now come to the point where she almost blubbered. Her heart hated her, it’d beat frantically whenever he’d approach, and his intoxicating smell made it impossible to form a coherent thought.

So, y/n decided to just stay clear of him to prevent any embarrassing situation.

After that, things didn’t get weird per se. Seeing y/n alone and drifting away from most group gatherings wasn’t weird. What was though, was her absence during the night shifts.

Before she monopolized those shifts, now she took turns like everyone else.

That was the big spy that made everyone worry about her. Non though went to talk to her about it. It would have been too personal for most of the crew to ask, and those who didn’t think better of it.

The twins knew her very well, she’d come to them whenever she was ready.

The captain… well, he didn’t react at all, which made y/n think that he hadn’t noticed anything.

He very well did, though. And the sign that he did was that he hadn’t come to her anymore. He noticed her withdrawal and while he didn’t understand why he respected her decision.

That didn’t mean that he gave up on her entirely though. His research moved elsewhere; his tactic shifted from approach to observe.

It took him almost a week to be feed with this new tactic. Not only did it prove unsuccessful, but he had almost broken a limb or two in his spying attempts.

One night, the one when he knew that you had taken the shift, he shifted again to ”approach”.

“Lovely night, eh?” He grimaced as the words left his mouth. Lamest approach ever.

“Oh, captain,” y/n exclaimed, startled by his unexpected presence, “yes, indeed.” She agreed, turning back to rest her arms over the bannister.

Nikolai’s eyes shine with amusement and y/n grimaced, cloaked in the darkness of the night, she was torn between wanting to punch herself or him. Maybe both.

“Sorry for startling you. I was surprised to see you here.”

“I’m on the night shift today,” she explained even though it wasn’t needed but saints. If they had given her social skills, she would have been too powerful.

“I see. It does not happen as often,” his eyes roamed over to her face, he could only see the side facing him thanks to the moonlight.

Y/n knew what he was doing, the man was hardly subtle, but she appreciated his attempt of breaching the subject lightly.

“We all took turns; it wasn’t fair for me to hijack this time shift.”

“I’m far too smart for you to lie to my face,”

“Excuse me?”

“What I mean to say,” he sighed, regret showing on his face, “is that I worry that you might have changed your habits because of me.”

“Why would you think that?”

“It has not escaped my notice that you’ve trying to avoid me.”

“Avoiding someone on a ship is an impossible feat.”

“I’m aware,” he smirked, and something told her that seeing her trying to do exactly that amused him to no end. Y/n turned back towards to sea and said nothing. Better silence than pointless words.

“So,” it was Sturmhond who broke the silence, “want to tell me what’s the problem?”

“There’s no problem, captain.”

“Again with lying,” he chided softly. Sturmond knew y/n like the back of his hand. Being on a ship will do that. He knew then that the best way to approach her wasn’t to put her under the spotlight or in a corner.

She sighed, knowing that lying to him would not get her out of this situation. Trying to muster her courage, she turned to him.

“Alright, you’re right,” she conceded and that alone was telling since Sturmonhd’s ego didn’t need any stroking. “You haven’t done anything wrong, though. It’s me.”

“I find that hard to believe.”

“You should because it’s true. Sometimes I get overwhelmed by my emotions and I don’t know how to deal with them.”

“So, you just run from the situation?”

“I wouldn’t exactly call it running,” she mumbled under her breath. His intense stare put her even more on edge.

“Isn’t that point of living, though?” he added softly, “Feeling?”

“Maybe.”

“Amazing,” he said with an edge to his voice.

“What?” Y/n’s eyes flickered to him and the expression on his face left her wondering if he was serious or making fun of her.

“I’ve seen you facing volcras and other enemies straight on with a courage that puts to shame many soldiers and yet this is what you’re afraid of?”

“Rejections is much scarier than combat.” Abandoning every attempt of pretence, y/n went with the truth. She was already in the game, now she had no choice but to play.

“Is it?” His brow raised and now there was no doubt that he was making fun of her.

“If something goes bad in a battle, I’m dead. And there’s nothing for me to worry about if that happens, right?”

“But putting myself out there and then getting rejected, means living with the shame and embarrassment of knowing that I’m not enough.”

“Well, that’s a rather tragic take on it.”

“Joke all you want. I don’t suppose you know what it feels like, giving your shining hair and dazzling smile.”

“While knowing you think that of me brings me immense joy, I would also like to point out that you’re wrong.”

Now it was her turn to raise her eyebrow in wonder.

“Rejection takes a whole other shade of intensity when it comes from your family.” The words were said lightly but they made her breath get caught in her throat anyway.

“Is it because of your lifestyle?”

“It’s because of their opinion of me that I’ve chosen this lifestyle.”

“I’m sorry that your family is unable to see how much you shine.” “Maybe it’s because you’ve blinded them?” She tried to ease the tension and she was rewarded with a tease of a smile.

“Oh, don’t point it at me! I will lose my eyes and then you’ll throw me from this ship,” she shrieked and went to shield her eyes as if she was under the midday sun. This foolish stunt earned her the captain’s laugh. One so full and rich that left no doubt of its authenticity. It made y/n smile too and wish that he’d do that more often.

“I would never throw you from this ship.”

“What use could I have with no eyes?”

“I’m sure we’ll be able to find you something else to do.”

“Like being the ship’s clown.”

“While you amuse me to no end, I was thinking about a far more private role.”

“Private as in?”

“Meant for my eyes only.”

“Selfish much?”

“When it comes to you? Shamelessly so.”

The privateer leaned down to her, agonizingly slow giving her all the time to pull away if she wanted to. A million things swirled through her mind in those few seconds. Every worry about what was going to happen, about all the ways this could go sour.

The wheels in her mind turned incredibly fast almost making her lightheaded. Before this could turn into a full session of overthinking though, y/n shook her head effectively stopping the thoughts from growing.

Despite her lacking in basic social skills in an incredibly sad way, conversation with him always flowed easily. She never worried about what she was supposed to do or say or whatever. She could just… be. Be y/n.

That was priceless if not rare. And right then and there she decided that she wasn’t willing to lose it. Not without fighting.

Borne from the spur of the moment the best decision she could ever make, she leaned into him as well. Closing her eyes, she was able to see the corner of his lips lifted a little before she felt his lips on him.

Saints.

Did she say that she was afraid of feeling? Fuck that. This feeling, the feel of the touch of his lips on her, his fingers lightly stroking her face, his breath inside her, him becoming a part of her? She was pretty sure was going to die if she went too long without it.

Angling his head to the side, she pressed her lips on his with renowned fervour. Her hands found their way in his strands. A moan left him as y/n swallowed the sound. Using the grip on his hair, y/n pulled him to her. Sturmond gladly followed her lead, returning the intensity of the kiss before his hands gripped the back of her knees, lifting her up.

He lightly used the bannister as leverage, his grip shifting to her hips holding her so tightly so that losing her was not an option. Not now, not ever.

#nikolai lantsov #nikolai lanstov x reader #nikolai reader x grisha reader #grishaverse #nikolai lanstov imagine #nikolai lanstov imagines #nikolai lastov fluff #nikolai lanstov angst #nikolai lanstov x y/n #nikolai lanstov fic #shadow and bone

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ladydaemon · 3 years

Note

ayooooo can i get some jealous nikolai please!!!! like seeing you talking to someone else and getting all angry only to admit he really wants ur attention ! pls and thank u <3333

A/N: This is set in Siege and Storm (i think lol it's been awhile) so spoilers for that. Also, this is technically Sturmhond x reader but we aren't going to talk about that. This is probably not what you wanted and honestly it's so short I hate it, sorry in advance.

Summary: One of the Darkling's Grisha flirts with you, only for a pissed privateer to intervene.

Warnings: swearing, um insecure nikolai but not really, also beware i haven't read rule of wolves yet sooo

"Herring is fucking delicious."

"We can't be friends anymore."

"Bold of you to assume we were friends in the first place."

"Honestly, fuck you, Tamar," Y/N huffed, scowling at the woman. First, there was the Darkling demanding passage back to Ravka with his prisoners and prissy Grisha, and now her best friend telling her she liked the one food she despised?

Betrayal of the worst kind.

Y/N turned back to the deck of the ship, watching with a sort of disgusted curiosity at the newcomers on their ship. They're like parrots, she thought. Brightly colored, virtually useless, and they don't stop talking.

The Grisha were doing nothing - walking around, trying to look important and above everyone else, and pestering the crew with questions like, when are we getting there? why is it taking so long? wait, there isn't a hairdresser on board?

"Oh, look at him. What, did he have a rebellious phase as a teenager and didn't grow out of it?" Tamar's voice brought her out of her thoughts, pulling them towards the Darkling. Y/N had to admit, Tamar was right - he was staring pensively out at the ocean, black cape billowing around him, and he generally looked very much like he was brooding.

"An hour of deck-swabbing says the girl down there is his ex," she snorted, swinging her legs over the edge of the boat. It was one of those days where the seas were calm and the breeze was light, and only a couple people were needed to keep the boat moving. Y/N and Tamar were enjoying the free time while it lasted.

"If you think I'm making that bet you are out of your mind. I agree completely."

Y/N hummed, enjoying the sea breeze for a bit before a small cough made her look up to see a broad-shouldered man in a blue kefta with red embroidery standing beside her. "May I sit with you ladies?"

It was clear he wasn't asking, and Tamar and Y/N exchanged an amused glance. "Sure."

The man settled gracefully next to Y/N, kefta pleated like a schoolgirl's around him. Y/N stifled a giggle. It was silent for a beat before she and Tamar resumed their argument, bickering and laughing.

The Grisha put his hand on her thigh.

Both Y/N and Tamar froze for half a second. Tamar raised an eyebrow, a silent question, but Y/N shook her head, ever so slightly. She wanted to just how long the poor man would last.

Y/N turned to face the Grisha, a honeyed smile on her face. "Yes?"

He was obviously pleased that she had recognized him, and took it as his chance to speak, though his hand never left her thigh. "I don't believe we've been properly introduced. My name is Aaron."

"Y/N."

Aaron began to strike up some odd conversation that she barely payed attention to, grinning in a way that he probably thought was flirtatious. He was utterly oblivious to the rest of the crew noticing and snickering, placing bets on when Nikolai would intervene.

A cold, tight voice interrupted Aaron midsentence. "I suggest you take your hand off of my commander's thigh before I cut it off. We wouldn't want any mini Y/Ns running around now, would we?"

"A truly terrifying thought," Tamar agreed.

Y/N looked up to see one Nikolai Lantsov glaring at Aaron, who looked up at him in surprise.

Well, it wasn't really Nikolai Lantsov - this version of him was red-haired and green-eyed, with a weirdly-shaped face and a gaudy teal peacoat covering an equally gaudy yellow tunic. This was Sturmhond, privateer and sailor, not Nikolai, prince and royal.

It really came to no surprise that Aaron decided that he was of a higher status and that she was his for the taking. He stood up, chest-to-chest with Nikolai. "And why should I, thief?"

"Privateer, actually," Nikolai corrected smoothly, and if you hadn't known him, you wouldn't have seen the barely leashed anger, the fury in his eyes. "And because you spoiled brats don't know how to sail a paper boat, let alone a ship such as this. Good luck getting back to Ravka without my crew's help."

Aaron bristled, but Nikolai had the upper hand in the squabble, and everyone knew it. The Inferni scowled and walked away as Nikolai sat down next to the woman in question. To anyone else, he looked casual and in control, but his eyes were narrowed and his fists were slightly clenched and his breathing was far heavier than it should be.

Y/N sighed.

"Well, come on then," she grunted, pulling herself up and offering a hand to him. "Let's go to your room so you can all that teenage boy angst out."

He huffed, stuck his tongue out, but took her hand (not letting go, a fact noticed by Aaron, who whitened in understanding) and followed her belowdecks to his spacious office-slash-bedroom.

"Now, how about you let out all your-" Y/N began, starting to turn around – and stopping halfway there because she was being hugged from behind by one teddy-bear of a man.

"Pay attention to me, please," he whined softly, burying his face in the crook of her neck.

She stifled a giggle, reaching over her head to pat his hair. "Your coat is gaudy, your hair is too red, and your face looks like a donkey's ass."

Nikolai huffed a breath, the warm air tickling her skin. "If you insist on being stubborn-"

"I'm not finished-"

"Please?" His voice was almost childlike, almost shy, and Y/N found herself willing to indulge him. "Tell me about Novyi Zem again."

Ah. Honestly, it was a surprise that she hadn't expected it.

Y/N had grown up in Novyi Zem - she was the daughter of two farmers, and had grown up in the fields. Nikolai, being royal, was utterly fascinated by. He wanted to know how the plows worked (and how he could make them better), how the crops were rotated (so he could improve the rotation), how much money a farmhand costed (so he could determine if they were overpaid or underpaid), how much money went into the pastures and barns.

But most of all, he wanted to hear about her. Her childhood friends, how she had spent her days. He would listen for hours, just soaking in tiny details that seemed irrelevant to her, and commit them to memory. He knew that she had had a dog name Foxie, she rode with an English saddle, that she had named one of the cows Milky, that she hated working in the garden but loved plowing the fields, and that her childhood crush's name was Maurin.

"What do you want me to tell you, sobachka?" Nikolai huffed slightly at the nickname. With the Darkling on their ship and the Grisha onboard, it wasn't safe to say his real name, even in the safe quarters belowdecks, so Y/N had gotten around to calling him his nickname. It felt more him than 'Sturmhond', and it was common enough name that nobody would question it.

Somehow, Nikolai had managed to maneuver them both to the one windowed seat in the room, her sitting comfortably between his legs, back resting on his chest. She had barely noticed. "Anything. Everything."

And she told him. Talked and talked until the sun began to set and their legs had fallen asleep. And he listened, following each word, each syllable with rapt attention, mouth quirking upwards when he saw the glint in her eye until she went quiet, her voice used and spent from talking so much so she just rested her head on his chest and he held and at that moment, Prince Nikolai Lantsov of Ravka knew that he would do absolutely anything to get her attention.

#nikolai lantsov #nikolai lantsov x reader #nikolai lantsov x you #grishaverse #nikolai lantsov x y/n #shadow and bone #king of scars #rule of wolves #dae answers

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triptuckers · 3 years

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Two Homes (part 5/7) - Nikolai Lantsov

Request: no Pairing: Nikolai Lantsov x reader Summary: even though you were determined to leave the palace as soon as you could, you now find yourself waking up in a luxurious room of the palace months later Warnings: angst Word count: 4.7K..... yea A/N: for the sake of this series, nikolai never gave alina the lantsov emerald lol also this turned out longer than I planned it to be but do I regret it? maybe a bit not in the slightest, enjoy reading! :) (also I know I posted part 4 like yesterday but I want this one out there cause a lot happens & I want to post part 6 & 7 so bad) PREVIOUS PART | NEXT PART TAG LIST (two homes and/or all grishaverse fics): @godsofwriting@im-constantly-fangirling @ayushmitadutta @mrs-brekker15@dancingwith-sunflowers @thegirlwiththeimpala @parker-natasha @story-scribbler @romanoffstarkovs @daliareads @meiitanoia @itsnotquimey (if your name is in bold it means I couldn't tag you) @sanktaesperanza @whymyparentscheckmyphone @aleksanderwh0r3 @ilovemarvelanne1 add yourself to my tag lists here

For someone who had dreaded going to Os Alta, you find yourself starting to actually like it. After pulling you aside, out of earshot of your father, Nikolai explained to you why he told your father he’d picked you as his bride.

When he told you it was to ensure he couldn’t control your life any longer, you got confused, asking him why he would do such thing. In response, he recalled the conversation you had at the gardens, when you told him your father had been controlling your entire life, and how people had made decisions for him his entire life as well.

Nikolai merely said he thought you deserved to make your own choices for once. Even if it meant living at the palace, far away from Ketterdam.

You had agreed to stay at the palace. You knew you couldn’t go back to Ketterdam now. The news of Nikolai picking you as his bride would probably travel faster than you’d like to.

While you did like Nikolai, and you enjoyed the little time you had spent with him, you made it clear you still didn’t want to marry him. That a part of still longed for Ketterdam.

Nikolai listened to you explaining your choices, and respected them. While both of you knew all eyes would be on you after announcing the engagement, you also knew you couldn’t push it back any further. Not after all the rumours.

He did agree to wait with picking an actual wedding date, giving you enough time to get used to your new life. You had told him you had no intention of marrying him, but over time you found yourself thinking more and more about it.

You’re amazed by the palace, and the life you live now. Every day, you walk around the palace, finding new routes and rooms. You start to think you might never see all of it in one lifetime. And you visit the gardens as well.

You keep the yellow flower Nikolai had given you next to the mirror in your room. But you’d never tell him that, he’d tease you endlessly about it.

As more weeks pass by, you spend more time with Nikolai, as well as his triumvirate. He’d invited you to few of their meetings, telling you if you ever did get married, you’d have to attend them as well. And the sooner you got used to it, the better.

At first, it felt a little weird. You walk around with Nikolai and everyone knows you as his future bride. While it feels odd, Nikolai’s presence is a comforting one. And the more you get to know him, the more you actually start to like him. Maybe staying at the palace wouldn’t be so bad as you thought it would be.

He spends a lot of time getting to know you. You have long conversations about your life in Ketterdam and his time in the army. About both of your dreams for the future, and what you want to achieve. But you also talk about small and simple things such as your favourite dish, or a book you love.

Most of the talks take place in the gardens or your room. You like getting to know the Nikolai beneath the mantle of king. You start to realise the two of you aren’t so different. If you had been born in a different city, you might have been childhood friends.

On a particularly sunny spring morning, the two of you walk around the gardens again. Nikolai doesn’t even have to offer his arm to you, you already place your hand on it. After some time, you’ve slipped into an easy morning routine, which sometimes includes a walk through the gardens.

‘How long until the Summers Week blooms again?’ you ask him as you walk past the familiar bush.

Nikolai glances at the same bush. ‘Probably a couple of months.’ he says. ‘Why do you ask?’

‘I think they’re beautiful.’ you as the two of you sit down on the same bench you sat on so many months ago, when you had escaped the ball. ‘It really is a shame they only bloom for such a short period of time.’

‘Do you still have that one flower I gave you when we met?’ asks Nikolai.

You glare at him. You just know he’d never let you forget it if he knew you kept it. ‘Yes.’ you say. ‘I wouldn’t throw it away.’

And indeed, a smug look appears on Nikolai’s face. ‘I’m delighted you didn’t throw it away.’ he says.

You playfully roll your eyes. ‘I expect a new one when they bloom again.’ you say.

‘I’ll make sure to give you one, sweetheart.’ he says with a smile.

You feel your cheeks heat up at the mention of the nickname. He’d called you nicknames on more than one occasion. You still weren’t used to it. Maybe it had to do something with the fact that Nikolai seems to always look good.

You look at the bush again, getting lost in your thoughts. Nikolai seems to notice. After a while of silence, he speaks up.

‘What’s on your mind?’ he asks you.

You wonder when get got so good at reading your face. ‘I’ve been thinking about, well, all of this.’ you say, gesturing to the gardens and the palace behind you.

Nikolai turns so he can properly look at you. ‘And?’ he says.

‘I have to admit, life at the grand palace isn’t as bad as I thought it would be. And it has been nice not to have my father following me around all day long. I still miss Ketterdam, but maybe not as much as I used to.’ you say.

You briefly look at Nikolai and notice a faint smile on his lips as he’s listening to you.

‘Plus, the company isn’t so bad.’ you say. ‘I know I made it clear I didn’t want this. But the time I've spent here has been very nice. Everyone is so kind, and I love the walks around the palace.’

‘What exactly are you saying, Y/N?’ says Nikolai, though the look on his face tells you he already knows.

You take a deep breath. ‘I’m saying I’m willing to do this. I think I could be happy here. I’m willing to marry you. Even it it’s just for the sake of Ravka. I’d rather marry you than some old merchant back in Kerch.’ you say.

Nikolai smiles. ‘That’s good to hear.’ he says. ‘Was it my dashing smile or charming personality that made you decide to stay?’

‘Don’t get cocky now, Nikolai.’ you chuckle.

‘Sweetheart, have you actually met me? I’ll always be cocky.’ he says.

You laugh and Nikolai reaches out to take one of your hands in his.

‘But on a more serious note, I really am glad you decided to stay. I didn’t lie when I said you’re nice company.’ he says. ‘And now I can finally give you this.’

He gets something out of his pocket and holds it in his closed fist.

‘Close your eyes.’ he says.

You slightly raise your eyebrows. ‘Really?’ you say.

‘Really.’ says Nikolai, smirking at you.

You do as he says and close your eyes. You feel how Nikolai lifts your hand and slides something on your finger. You feel the weight of it on your finger and can tell what it is before Nikolai tells you to open your eyes.

A ring with a beautiful green emerald sits on your finger. Your lips part in surprise. He doesn’t even have to say it, you know this ring.

‘This is the Lantsov emerald.’ you say as you look at him.

‘It’s really just an emerald like any others.’ says Nikolai, looking at your hand which is still in his. ‘But that is what most people call it, yes.’

You admire the ring on your finger. ‘It’s beautiful.’ you say. When you look up, you see Nikolai looking at you with an odd expression on his face.

‘What is it?’ you say.

He simply smiles at you and shakes his head. ‘Nothing.’ he says. He gets up and offers you his arm again. ‘Shall we go back to the palace? It’s almost lunch time.’

You nod and get up as well but instead of laying your hand on his arm, you grab his hand and intertwine your fingers with his instead. The two of you walk back to the palace, and you try to ignore the way people look at your left hand, clearly eyeing the emerald ring.

This would be yet another rumour that would spread impossibly fast. You had to write another letter to the Crow Club soon. You’d rather have your friends find out through you, than because of rumours.

You’d been writing letters to the Crows since you decided you stay at the palace. You told them about your life at the palace, and in return they told you what was going on in Ketterdam.

You loved receiving letters from them. They each took turns writing you, and all of them signed the letter.

Once you had lunch, Nikolai got called away to another meeting, and you went to your room to write a letter to Ketterdam. As usual, you started off by asking them how they were doing, if any jobs went wrong, and a new prediction on how many card games Jesper had lost.

You then wrote about finally accepting the fact you’d marry Nikolai. Despite the chances being low they could attend, you invited them to the wedding anyway. You told them you’d send them a formal invitation with the date as soon as you picked a date.

And then the chaos started. Genya insisted on being in charge of the planning, and she also sketched you a few designs for your wedding dress. They were all equally stunning, and you couldn’t pick one. Eventually, Nikolai picked the one he thought would suit you best.

Zoya was in charge of putting together the guest list. When she asked you who you wanted to invite, you gave her the names of the Crows. She seemed a bit taken aback you’d invite them because after all, they were criminals. You hadn’t yet told her you’d been part of the Crows for many years as well.

When you looked at the list she was writing, you noticed your father’s name on it as well. He’d sent you many letters, which you ignored. You took the pen from Zoya’s hand and crossed his name off the list without a word.

Time seemed to fly by at an alarmingly speed. Before you know it, you wake up on the morning of your wedding. Until this day, it seemed like a strange concept somehow. As if you couldn’t fully realise it.

But when your eyes land on your wedding dress, you feel like for the first time, the realisation of what’s about to happen finally sinks in. You would marry Nikolai. You would take his name and you would become a queen. Of a country that’s not even your own.

A knock on your door catches you off guard and you call for them to come in. Genya enters, followed by a few servants. She’s beaming at you, clearly excited about today.

‘Are you ready?’ she says.

‘More like the most nervous I’ve ever been.’ you say.

Genya smiles at you as she sits down on the bed next to you. ‘I understand you’re nervous.’ she says. ‘But I promise you it’ll be alright. We’ll all be here right beside you. And it’s just one day.’

‘One day of ceremonies and traditions and then I’m a queen.’ you say, having an uneasy feeling in your stomach.

‘Nikolai will be there by your side. And we will be there as well.’ says Genya. ‘Now let’s get you in that dress.’

She rises to her feet and motions for you to get up as well. You hesitate.

‘Could you, um, go and get Nikolai?’ you ask her, avoiding her eyes. ‘I want to talk to him.’

‘Of course.’ she says and she immediately leaves the room. You get up and start to pace the room, ignoring the servants who are patiently waiting for you. It doesn’t take long for Genya to return with Nikolai.

Nikolai smiles at you and asks the servants and Genya to leave the room, which they do.

By the looks of it, Genya caught him while he was getting dressed. His hair is still messy and his shirt is hastily tucked into his pants. He walks up to you, looking at you.

‘What can I do for you?’ he says.

‘I’m nervous.’ you say.

‘If it helps, I’m nervous too.’ he says.

‘But you always manage to hide it behind a curtain of flirty comments and confidence.’ you say. ‘I wish I could do that.’

‘Y/N, just because I always know what to say, doesn’t mean I don’t get nervous.’ says Nikolai.

He reaches out to take your hand in his and walks you back to your bed, where you sit down.

‘Listen, it’s completely normal to be nervous. It’s a big day. A lot of important people are going to be present. But I want you to be okay with this, so do you still want to do this?’ he says.

You look at him and frown. ‘Yes, of course!’ you say. ‘We’re not going to cancel this whole thing because I’m nervous. I just hope I won’t throw up because of the nerves.’

Nikolai chuckles. ‘I’m sure you’ll be fine.’ he says. ‘If it makes you feel better, we could practice.’

You frown again. ‘Practice what? I know how weddings work, Nikolai.’ you say.

‘It wasn’t the entire wedding I was talking about.’ says Nikolai.

You look at him, waiting for him to continue. He looks at your lips instead.

‘Oh.’ you say softly. That was what he meant.

Nikolai slowly inches closer to you, leaning in. His eyes switch from your lips to your eyes, silently asking permission. You give the barest of nods and Nikolai closes the remaining space between you, softly pressing his lips against yours.

You close your eyes and focus on the feeling of his lips on yours. All of the nerves seem to leave your body as you easy into him. When he pulls away, your faces are still close to each other.

‘Well if that’s what you call practicing, I wonder what the real thing is going to do to top that.’ you say.

Nikolai laughs at your words. ‘You’re getting better at your comebacks with every passing day, sweetheart.’ he says.

‘I learn from the best.’ you say, smiling at him.

‘Are you ready for this?’ says Nikolai.

‘I am now.’ you say with a hint of newfound confidence.

Nikolai nods and gets up. ‘I’ll call Genya back.’ he says.

You get up as well and walk with him to the door. Before opening it, Nikolai takes your hand in his and presses a kiss to your knuckles. With a wink, he opens the door and steps out into the hallway.

Once Genya and the servants enter, she immediately drags you over and pushes you into a chair to do your hair.

‘You don’t seem nervous anymore.’ she says.

‘I’m not.’ you say. ‘Nikola and I, uh, talked about it.’ you say, unable to stop your cheeks from turning red.

Genya smiles knowingly at you. ‘I’m sure it was a good talk then.’ she says, emphasising the word “talk”.

‘It was.’ you say, avoiding her eyes.

The smile never leaves Genya’s face as she finishes with doing your hair. The servants help you to get in the dress, and you finally look at yourself in the mirror. Genya had really outdone herself with the dress. It looks beautiful on you, as if it was meant to be.

You turn to look at her. ‘Thank you.’ you say. ‘Truly. It’s perfect.’

‘Don’t thank me. Nikolai is the one who picked the dress.’ she says. ‘Are you ready to go?’

You take a deep breath and nod. Genya links her arm through yours and you start walking toward the small chapel on the palace grounds. The guests had already arrived and were gathered inside. You can hear them talking and chatting excitedly even outside the chapel.

Genya hugs you tightly and disappears inside the chapel. After a few deep breaths to calm yourself again, you firmly plant your feet on the ground. No going back now.

The doors to the chapel open and you watch as the guests all rise. A last deep breath, and you start walking. Were there really this many people on the list Zoya had put together?

You start to feel nervous again, but then you see Nikolai looking at you. He’s smiling brightly, and looks very handsome. You remember the feeling of his lips on yours, and find your confidence once more.

You slowly walk down the aisle, smiling as well, and your eyes are fixed on Nikolai. When you finally make it to the front of the chapel, Nikolai smiles as you stop walking.

‘Still nervous?’ he whispers softly, so only you can hear it.

‘Not anymore, thanks to you.’ you whisper back.

You take a quick look at the crowd. You only recognise the people that lived at the palace as well. Thankfully, you don’t see your father in the crowd. But your heart sinks as you don’t spot your Crows either. They didn’t come.

You had invited them. Maybe they feared being captured if they risked coming to Os Alta? Whatever their reason was, you’re sure it was a good one. You’d send them a letter after the wedding, asking them if maybe an important job had come up. But still, it hurt a little they wouldn’t attend your wedding.

The wedding itself seems to last minutes. You’re only focused on Nikolai. He holds your hand and you’re grateful he does. It helps keep you grounded. You had expected the wedding to be grand because after all, it is a royal one. But once you leave the chapel, hand in hand with Nikolai, you realise it turned out to be even better than you expected.

The two of you are silent as you walk through the halls of the palace. You see the door to your room in the distance, but Nikolai walks right past it. When you raise your eyebrows in question at him, he points at the door to his room in the distance.

‘They’d expect us to share a room. It’d be a bit weird if we got married but sleep in separate rooms.’ he says. ‘Don’t worry, the bed is large enough to fit both of us without having to cuddle close. Not that I would mind if you did.’

You chuckle at his words as he opens the door to his room. You’re thankful to be away from all the guests. You appreciated that they all came to attend the wedding, but you got tired of listening to their congratulations over and over again.

Once the door closes behind you, you immediately bend down to take off your heels. You watch as Nikolai shrugs off his suit jacket and runs a hand through his hair.

‘That wasn’t so bad, was it?’ he says.

‘It wasn’t bad at all.’ you say.

Nikolai studies your face. ‘But there’s something on your mind.’ he says.

‘I just...’ your voice trails off as you try to find the best way to voice your thoughts. Nikolai takes your hand and pulls you down to sit on the bed with him.

‘I thought they would come.’ you say softly. ‘I invited them, and I know I haven’t seen them in a while, but I thought they’d at least come to my wedding. I spent years with them.’

‘Maybe something else got in the way? Maybe something came up and they simply couldn’t make it?’ suggest Nikolai.

You shake your head. ‘Even if Kaz would plan a job, Jesper and Nina would burn down all of Ketterdam if a job prevented them from attending my wedding.’ you say. ‘I can’t think of a single reason why they wouldn’t come. I thought I meant more to them.’

‘What if you write them another letter? I’m sure if you just ask them, they’ll explain why they couldn’t be there.’ says Nikolai.

‘I was going to write them about it anyway.’ you say. ‘But first I want to change. As beautiful as this dress is, it’s incredibly heavy.’

‘I had a servant move some of your belongings here already.’ says Nikolai. ‘A part of the closet is now yours.’

‘Thank you.’ you say and you walk over to the closet, opening it. You pick one of your comfortable dresses and go to the bathroom to change. When you get back, you see Nikolai hasn’t changed yet. You didn't mind. He really looked good in a formal suit.

You move to sit behind Nikolai’s desk to write a letter to Ketterdam. You try to sound polite, but a part of you wants to just write what you’re actually thinking. But the Crows mean the world to you, and you don’t want to hurt them or piss them off.

Once you finish the letter, you seal it and hand it to a servant, telling them it’s urgent.

When you get back to the room, you find Nikolai sitting at his desk, fidgeting with something in his hands. Curiously, you walk over to him.

‘What are you doing?’ you say.

Nikolai looks up and holds out his hand to you. On his palm is a small boat, made out of a piece of rope. You carefully take it from his hand to examine it.

‘How did you learn how to make this?’ you as him.

He shrugs. ‘A lot of practicing.’ he says.

You smile and hand the little boat back to him. ‘It’s nice.’ you say. ‘Could you teach me how to make one?’

Nikolai nods and pulls out a second chair for you. He spends the rest of the evening trying to teach you how to make a boat out of a piece of rope. While his fingers move smoothly and create the boats with ease, you struggle with it. After all, he had probably done it for many years, whereas you’re only trying it out for the first time.

When you successfully finish your first boat, you decide to call it a night and go to sleep. Nikolai hadn’t been lying; the bed was big enough to fit the both of you comfortably without invading each other’s personal space.

Your usual routines don’t change much. Except for the fact you know share a room and a bed. And you notice there are more lingering glances between the two of you.

Like Nikolai had said, you’re expected to attend important meetings as well. You try to listen to it, but sometimes the meetings just aren’t interesting in your eyes. Luckily you always sit next to Nikolai, who is able to nudge your leg with his boot if he thinks you’re starting to zone out.

You have breakfast together every morning, expect for the mornings when Nikolai isn’t at the palace. You practice making boats out of rope, and you’re improving. Nikolai’s still turn out better than yours, but you’re getting there.

Every day, you ask if there’s mail for you. But somehow the Crows don’t send letters as frequently as they used to. And they had never given you a proper explanation as to why they didn’t attend your wedding.

Most of the times when you’re lost in thought, you’re thinking about Ketterdam. You hadn’t been there in months, not since the ball. It’s as if the longer you stay at the palace, the more you miss Ketterdam.

The city had always felt like home. And no matter how much you like spending time at the palace with Nikolai, you can’t help but to feel guilty for being away from Ketterdam for so long. You miss the city, and you miss your Crows.

Nikolai must have noticed something is bothering you, but you dodge his questions. You try to come up with excuses, but eventually, he pulls you aside and stands in front of the door, preventing you from slipping away.

‘Out with it.’ he says. ‘What is going on?’

You look at him, not sure what to say.

‘Is it our marriage? Do you regret it? Is that why you’re avoiding talking with me?’ says Nikolai.

‘Of course not!’ you quickly say. ‘Nikolai, I do not regret our marriage. I happen like you a lot.’

‘Then what is it?’ says Nikolai. ‘You’re not yourself and I can tell something is bothering you. Let me help you.’

‘I don’t know where to start.’ you say softly, lowering your head and looking at your feet. It all seemed so childish now.

‘I miss Ketterdam.’ you say softly. You feel tears burning behind your eyes. ‘I miss the harbour, and the tourists flooding the docks. I miss playing card games with Jesper, and going out with Nina. I miss talking with Inej and going over Kaz’ plans with him. I even miss reading to Wylan and trying to win a drinking contest from Matthias. I miss the Crow Club, and their laughter. I miss all of it.’

You see how Nikolai’s feet step closer to you and his hands cup your face, tilting it upward so you look at him. He brushes a tear away with his thumb.

‘It’s alright to miss Ketterdam.’ he says. ‘You left everything behind, I understand it if you miss it. It’s been your home for so long.’

‘But this is my home now.’ you say, your voice trembling slightly. ‘Here in Os Alta, with you. I shouldn’t long to go back to Ketterdam as much as I do.’

Nikolai smiles at you, but there’s a hint of sadness in his eyes. ‘I told you a long time ago I won’t let anyone else control the choices you make in life, sweetheart. If you want to go to Ketterdam, I think you should go.’ he says.

You stare up at him, letting his words sink in. ‘But I’m your wife. You’d let me go just like that?’ you say.

‘You are indeed my wife. But I’m not going to tell you how to live your life. If you think you’re happier in Ketterdam than you are at the palace, then you should go. Go and be happy.’ he says.

‘But I'm happy with you too.’ you say. ‘I just miss my home, that’s all.’

He smiles again. ‘Then you should go home. This is not goodbye forever, you know.’ he says.

‘Not goodbye forever.’ you say, repeating his words.

You stand on your toes and lean up to kiss him. Nikolai pulls you closer and you wrap your arms around his waist in response. When you pull back, he rests his forehead against yours.

‘Go.’ he says softly. ‘Go to your Ketterdam, go to your Crows. I’m sure they’d love to see you again.’

You nod and pull yourself out of his embrace. Nikolai watches you as you quickly pack a bag with some essentials. You can’t bear to look at him again as you walk past him, out of the room.

You didn’t know Nikolai followed you from a distance, to see you off. As soon as you got on a horse and left the gates, he stands at the top of the stairs that lead to the entrance of the palace.

He watches you as you become a smaller and smaller dot on the horizon. The triumvirate, who had seen the two of you leave, joins him on the steps, wondering what Nikolai is looking at.

‘Was that Y/N? says Zoya. ‘Where is she going?’

‘Back to Ketterdam.’ says Nikolai.

Zoya turns to Nikolai. ‘You let her go?’ she says. ‘Saints, Nikolai, why did you let her go?’

Nikolai doesn’t say anything and continues to look at the horizon. Genya is studying Nikolai’s face as he looks at you in the distance. Her lips part in surprise, but her eyes are sad.

‘Because he loves her.’ says Genya.

A/N: If you want to request something, make sure to read my house rules Here’s the list of characters I write for. Everything that I have written can be found on my masterlist. Please don’t repost my work, as I spend much time and effort on it!! Thank you for reading! Much love, Marit

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