#I know I have never made the post about how I feel about the story
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does anyone know where the love of god goes? | joel miller
pairing/AU: joel miller x female!reader – post breakout & no ellie AU
summary: crossing the country alone as he searches for his brother, joel stumbles on a farm. winter is closing in, and against his better judgement he's convinced to stay. as the frost covers the land like a blanket, a warmth ignites in his heart for the young woman who's home he finds himself in.
warnings: this is an 18+ fic so minors dni!!! canon-typical violence, age gap (reader is mid to late twenties), swearing, dead animals, joel being a sad man, masturbation, no use of y/n
a/n: i soft launched this ao3 last month and it flopped lol so i'm gonna keep my expectations low for this series. anyways this has been a story i've been thinking about since probably october. this is the first part of what i'm hoping will be 3 parts. happy reading i guess
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The leaves rustled against Joel’s boots with every step he took. The sun had turned traitor cold, and he couldn’t feel its kiss against his cheek no more. The trees shivered above him in the wind – the only sound for miles except his heavy steps.
Did he still exist, with no one around? Joel had never minded being alone; after the breakout he’d found that he sometimes preferred it. People could be… well, when you’ve seen the worst of humanity, maybe it’s best to leave it behind.
And wasn’t he the worst of humanity? The things he’d done. The people he’d killed, and killed for. The people he’d lost.
But he had to keep going. For Tess. He promised.
Every night as he stared into the flames his thoughts would drift to her – the memories flickering in the fire. They should’ve never gone through that museum – it was supposed to have been empty – they should’ve never left Boston in the first place. Now Tess is gone because of him, him and his stupid plan to find his brother.
And for what? How is he ever gonna find Tommy?
Joel didn’t even know where he was. Nebraska? South-Dakota? Maybe he’d made it to Wyoming and just didn’t know it? Abe had told him ‘Cody Tower’, but Joel hadn’t seen anything other than mother nature for weeks.
Everything had started to look the same. Trees and more trees, a mountain in the distance, a grey and heavy sky above him. He’d been walking for forever. Slowly he moved west– or at least he thought he was. On the days where the sun hung high in the sky and wasn’t shielded behind a cloudy partition, he liked to watch it as it dipped below the earth. As the days turned shorter and shorter, the display of color had started to get more vivid. Joel would watch the light blue turn red and bloody, fiery tongues of flames licking over the horizon while the sharp edges of the mountains, and the triangular shapes of the trees faded into an intense black– like the shape of the mountain and the trees had been cut out with scissors. There wasn’t much to stay alive for anymore– but Joel lived for those few moments where nature painted with fire. Humanity might’ve gone to shit, but the cyclical regularity of mother nature gave Joel a small sense of peace.
But he missed the kiss of the sun against his cheek now. He’d moved into a large forest a few days ago. Tall trees hovered over him like giants and cast shadows down at him. It was colder here than out in the open country, but at least he’d been somewhat shaded from the rain pouring from the grey cover above his head the last few days.
Thwack. Thwack. Thwack.
The sound stopped Joel in his tracks. Muscle memory worked on its own, gripping the shotgun slung over his shoulder. He listened for the sound again, to the steady rhythm echoing through the forest.
Thwack. Thwack. Thwack.
With slow calculated steps Joel walked in the direction of the sound with the shotgun held tightly to his chest, his finger hovered over the trigger. The chopping sound got louder as he closed in on a man. He couldn’t tell his age with the man’s back turned – but he was strong – Joel could tell from how hard the man’s axe hit the tree trunk.
Taking another silent step, Joel got in position, “How ‘bout you slowly turn around and place that axe on the ground.”
Joel’s voice was hoarse after no use, but still cold and calculated as he spoke his order. He could see he’d startled the man, probably thinking he was alone, just like Joel had thought mere minutes ago.
The man obeyed, turning around slowly. He was older than Joel, maybe mid-seventies, maybe older if the wrinkles and creases around his eyes and nose were to be believed. His hair was white as snow matching his unkempt beard. Joel caught his eye. Strong and steady, no trace of fear one would think a man would feel while having a gun pointed at them.
Joel’s grip around the gun tightened. He wasn’t afraid to pull the trigger if that’s where this was headed. The man watched him calmly before he bent his knees, throwing the axe haphazardly on the ground.
“Kick it over here,” Joel commanded again, and the man obeyed, kicking the axe clumsily towards Joel.
Slowly Joel crept closer, gun still pointed at the man. He locked the heel of his shoe against the shaft, dragging the axe behind him and out of the way.
“Hands where I can see ‘em.”
“Are you going to kill me, son?”
The man’s question puzzled Joel. He said it so calmly, like how you’d ask someone to pass the salt.
“That depends on you.” Joel’s answer pulled at the old man’s lips, a small huff of a laugh escaping them.
“Well, you’re the one with the gun. I think it depends on you.”
Joel tightened his grip on the shotgun again – he didn’t know why –to frighten the man? He didn’t seem very frightened.
“Are you alone?” Joel asked.
“Not anymore,” the man answered.
“Don’t be a smartass,” Joel gritted through his teeth, “who you travelin’ with?”
“No one,” the man’s eyes never left Joel, “I live at a farm about a mile away.”
“Take me to it.”
The man walked with a limp Joel noticed. It was barely there, you wouldn’t see it if you didn’t pay attention, but it was there. The man acted tough enough, but his body revealed his weaknesses. It would be easy to kill him, Joel thought, if it came to that.
He followed the man through the trees with his gun pointed at his back. When they reached the end of the forest a clearing revealed itself. They followed a path through a field of, tall but wilted, brown grass until they reached an overgrown gravel road with a fence running along it. Looking out in the distance, Joel could see small spots of white and black wool. The gravel moaned under their feet as they closed in on a small farm. A two-story house sat in the middle of the barnyard where it was surrounded by a barn who’d seen better days, a silo, and a smaller farmhouse – a stable – Joel noticed as they walked closer.
The man trudged up the front stairs of the main farmhouse, a hand on the handrail keeping him steady.
“Put that gun away would you, son? I don’t want you frightening my wife.” The man broke the silence between them, speaking for the first time since they left the woods.
Joel’s grip on his shotgun didn’t loosen. How could he be sure that this man’s ‘wife’ wasn’t some gang of raiders hiding behind the front door? A question he asked the man through gritted teeth when he turned around to look at Joel.
“There’s nothing of the sort around here,” the man said, “we don’t even see any infected.”
When Joel didn’t say anything, and didn’t lower the gun, the man spoke again, “Who are you?”
“Just someone passin’ through,” Joel answered, making the man chuckle.
“You’re something else, passer-througher,” the old man smiled before he turned around again and stepped inside, leaving Joel on the porch alone.
Abandoned outside he lowered his gun slightly. Inside he could hear muffled voices, a deeper one, definitely the old man, and a brighter one, a woman’s voice. He listened, trying to make out their words with no prevail. The man seemed to have spoken the truth up until now. He most definitely lived on this farm – a seemingly normal farm. This man was just someone making an honest living – even after the apocalypse.
Lowering the gun completely, Joel put the safety on before he slung it over his shoulder. Taking a hollowed step towards the front door, movement in the window to the right of him caught his eye. It was there and then it was gone – just a ruffle of blonde curtains. Then, the door opened revealing an elderly woman.
The man’s wife.
“Welcome, traveler,” she greeted, stepping aside to let Joel in.
He passed through the doorway with a “Thank you, ma’am,” never forgetting his manners even after pointing a gun at her husband.
Inside it looked like a picture taken straight out of a Homes & Gardens magazine. The house was cozy, but it was small. He’d been welcomed into what probably used to be a parlor, but now served its purpose as their living room. It was hard to get a read on the house. Not like those open-floor plan houses he’d built too many of back before the outbreak – this was old, maybe hundreds of years old. The floorboard creaked under his shoes as he walked deeper into the living room, the rest of the house locked away like a secret behind three closed doors. The man was seated in a lounge chair by the fireplace, watching Joel with an expression Joel found it hard to decipher.
“Would you like some tea?” the woman asked, “It’s peppermint from our garden.”
Joel turned his head to the woman. She must be around the same age as the old man, Joel thought. He cleared his throat before he answered with a nod, “Thank you, ma’am.”
She pointed to the sofa, urging him to sit down with a smile before she disappeared through one of the doors to what Joel thought must be the kitchen. He felt the old man watching him as he slid his backpack off his shoulders, placing it on the creaky wooden floor behind the sofa. Joel hesitated for just a second when placing the shotgun up against the back, but decided he wasn’t in any imminent danger.
Joel almost groaned as he sat down. He’d been walking for so long, slept on the hard ground for months, he’d almost forgotten what a comfortable chair was. It almost felt surreal, being invited in for tea, like the outbreak had never happened. Here, it was like the time had stood still.
“So,” the man started, “where are you heading to if you’re just ‘passin’ through’?”
Joel cleared his throat again, “I’m lookin’ for my brother,” he answered truthfully, “last I heard he was somewhere in Wyoming.”
“If you’re going to Wyoming, then what you’re doing all the way up here?” The man queried with a chuckle.
Annoyed, Joel grinded his teeth, “Not many signs in the fuckin’ woods are there?” He huffed.
“I guess not,” the man shrugged, “but you’ve made a heck of a detour… where did you come from? Texas? You sound it.”
“Boston.”
“Boston?” the man didn’t hide his surprise, breathing out chuckles in disbelief, “I’ll give it to you, that’s one long trip.”
Joel only huffed in agreement, turning his head from the man to the window overlooking the barnyard.
“Well,” the man broke the growing silence between the two men, “you’re more than welcome to stay for dinner and for the night– you look like you could need a hot meal and a warm bed.”
Joel’s instinct was to say no, but before he could the front door opened, revealing a young woman. You.
You stopped dead in your tracks as you laid your eyes on Joel, “Oh!”.
The door slammed behind you. Under your arm you were carrying a metal bucket filled with apples. You were beautiful, young, but still beautiful – Joel couldn’t deny it.
“This is…” The man paused.
“Joel.” He cleared his throat, introducing himself, “Joel Miller.”
“Mr. Miller is just passing through– he’s looking for his brother,” the old man explained to you.
You nodded at the information, sat the bucket down before you reached out a hand for Joel to take, introducing yourself. Your hand in his was warm and soft while his own dwarfed yours, rough and calloused. He couldn’t help but think about what his hands had done, the people they’d killed. He shouldn’t be tainting yours, painting them red. Joel quickly drew his hand back, balling it into a fist at his side.
Joel looked over at the old man, “Your daughter?” he asked with a tilt of his head in your direction.
“Oh, no,” the man answered with a playful smile, “You’re not the first person ‘passin’ through’ who’s shown up on our doorstep.”
The door to the kitchen opened to reveal the old woman with a teapot in her hand, and a stacked tower of teacups in the other.
“Let me help you Alma,” you said, taking the teacups from the old woman’s hand before placing them on the table; one in front of Joel, a second in front of the old man, “Here you go Arthur,” and a third next to Joel.
“Did you also want some tea, sweetie?” Alma asked you as she placed the steaming teapot on the table.
“Yes, please, but I can grab a cup myself– sit down,” you smiled and padded the old woman’s shoulder, then you grabbed the bucket of apples and disappeared into the kitchen.
Alma started pouring the tea as a silence fell over the room. A small, “Thank you, ma’am,” left Joel’s lips as she moved on to pouring tea for her husband.
“So,” the man started before taking a sip of his tea, “what do you say Mr. Miller? You staying for the night?”
That night as he laid in a real bed for the first time in months, Joel had trouble falling asleep. He wasn’t used to this. Hadn’t been used to it for a while. His belly full, soft fabric against his skin, feeling warm, and clean. The old couple had offered him one of the two bedrooms on the first floor, the two mystery doors in the living room now revealed. Laying in his new bed he tried not to think about who he was sharing a wall with.
You.
You were something else, helpful and kind. Everything Joel hadn’t seen since the outbreak. At the dinner table you’d asked him questions and listened intently – even when his answers were short and brisk. There was a glimmer in your eye, and it touched something inside him he hadn’t felt in a long time. But you were young, mid to late twenties he reckoned, maybe a little older– anyways, he shouldn’t be harboring anything for you, it wouldn’t be right. Especially now, now that he’d agreed to stay.
After the dinner plates had been cleared, Arthur had folded a big map out on the table. “Here are we now,” he’d pointed a finger at the map. Montana. Southern Montana to be precise. “I’ll give it to you Mr. Miller, if you’ve made it this far on your own you probably won’t have any trouble making your way down south to Wyoming.”
“But?” Joel watched the grimace pulling at the old man’s face.
“But,” Arthur had said, “Winter is just around the corner and… well, going back out there in the wilderness alone during our winters is a dead trap, I’ll tell you that much.”
Joel had let the man go on about the far below freezing temperatures, the heavy snow, and the tough wind, but Joel wasn’t stupid. He knew the winters up here were harsh. It wasn’t even winter yet, but every day he’d felt the temperature drop lower and lower, and the last few of nights he’d even had to get a fire going, against his better judgement.
So– the deal was: Joel would stay over the winter. Just for the winter, he’d been adamant on not staying longer. He’d get a place to stay, a warm bed to sleep in, and food in his belly on one condition – he’d help out on the farm.
The fire crackled loudly, red tongues licking up the chimney as Joel fed it another log. He watched as the fire caught in the new log, devouring it quickly and with no mercy. It was really starting to heat up now. A small flicker of pride sparked in Joel chest. He’d always been good at building a fire. It was one of those things, Joel had come to learn, where you needed to pay attention, to have patience.
When he was younger, he’d take Tommy out camping sometimes, just the two of them. Mostly they’d go during the summer; Tommy wasn’t a fan of sleeping outside in the cold, though cold had meant something different back then in Texas. But Joel remembered one time he’d managed to convince him to go with him. It was right after he’d gotten his driver’s license, and his parents had given him a beat-up truck for his birthday – for sharing – they’d told him, “You need to give your little brother a ride when he needs it!” Joel wasn’t exactly thrilled about his future as Tommy’s private driver, but it didn’t mean he didn’t love his brother.
A few weeks into October he’d managed to convince Tommy to go camping. They’d packed the truck with their tents, sleeping bags, and fishing equipment, before they’d gotten on the road, driving to a lake where they knew there were fish to catch. Finding a place to camp was always difficult with Tommy. They’d parked Joel’s truck at the edge of the forest before they’d followed a hiking trail. Joel was convinced they’d walked at least three quarters of the way around the lake before they found a spot good enough for Tommy.
It had to be flat, but also shielded. There couldn’t be too many rocks, but there also had to be enough rocks to build a hearth. Tommy wanted it to be private, but he also wanted it to be open enough that he could see if someone would stumble upon their camp. Joel knew not to argue with him when he got like that, opting instead for a defeated, “Whatever.”
Setting up camp went relatively easy. They’d worked together building the tents, collecting rocks for their fireplace, and even managed to find a fallen tree to use as a bench. When the night slowly started to cover them in darkness, Tommy decided to get the fire going. Joel watched him work the logs into a pile as he started on filleting the fish they’d just caught.
“You’re doin’ it wrong,” he’d told his brother, “You’re suffocatin’ it.” He’d washed his hands in the lake, ridding himself of the slimy smell of fish, before crouching down next to Tommy.
The fire was one big bowl of smoke, and Joel caught himself wondering what messages Tommy must’ve been sending to the heavens. He removed some of the heavier logs, and the fire could breathe.
“See?” he’d looked at Tommy, “It just needed air.” Joel had shifted the smaller pieces of wood around and not long after the fire was alive.
That Joel, that green boy who liked to take his little brother camping, that Joel didn’t know how much those skills would come in handy in a few years when the world would get turned upside down.
“Do you have any mittens, Joel?”
Your question pulled Joel from his memories. He turned his head slightly, meeting your gaze from where you were huddled up in the corner of the couch. You looked cozy, but he knew you weren’t. The house was cold this morning, outside a thin layer of frost had stuck to the grass during the night. It was early too, the sun not having climbed high enough yet to peek over the mountains. You looked tired where you sat, clad in a wool sweater with a blanket pulled over your knees. Under the blanket Joel remembered you were still wearing your pajama pants, and in your hand you held a steaming cup of tea, peppermint, Joel knew, his own cup abandoned on the coffee table.
“What?” Joel answered, eyebrows furrowed.
“Do you have any mittens, Joel?” you repeated softly, like the way people tended to speak in the mornings, like they were afraid they’d wake up the world.
His calves were starting to burn from the strain of being crouched in front of the fireplace for a moment too long, and he tried his best to hide his groan, biting his teeth together as he stood to his feet, knees cracking loudly.
“Um, no,” he said, confused about your question.
“I’ll knit you a pair then,” you smiled before putting your cup down next to his.
“That’s… that ain’t necessary,” Joel hurried, but you waved him off.
“Sure it is,” you smiled again, much to Joel’s annoyance. He didn’t deserve your kindness, but you gave it away like it cost nothing. “If you’re gonna be helping Arthur out in the woods this winter, you need some mittens.”
Joel watched as you got up from your home on the couch and vanished into your bedroom. A moment later you appeared in the doorway with a basket under your arm.
“Also…” you gave him another smile as you sat back down again, placing the basket in your lap. It was close to overflowing with yarn, balls of black and white in varying sizes peeking over the top, the homespun ends fraying against the rough edges of the basket. “I’ll have something to do during the evenings,” you winked before you rummaged through the basket and fished out a measuring tape.
Joel shifted his weight from one foot to the other as he watched you. Mittens? Joel can’t remember if he’s ever owned a pair of mittens. Gloves, sure, but mittens?
You patted the cushion next to you, urging him to sit down, kind smile hanging off your lips like always. Sitting down, he folded his hands in his lap, suddenly very aware of how close you were sitting. It wasn’t like he hadn’t sat next to you before; he’d been here a few weeks now, and he was starting to know you, but for some reason, this felt different. Maybe it was the early morning, the quiet house, or the fact that Alma and Arthur were still sleeping upstairs, but it felt like it was just the two of you, alone, and Joel didn’t know how to feel about it.
You shifted towards him, the blanket slipping slightly off the couch with your movement, in your hands you held the measuring tape while you looked at him expectantly.
When Joel didn’t move, a smile quirked at the corner of your mouth before you grabbed one of his hands resting in his lap. You uncurled his fingers slowly, one by one, making Joel hold his breath.
“I need to see how big I need to make them,” you whispered, holding his hand very gently.
Joel’s heart hammered in his chest. Your hand was warm and soft, like the last time he’d touched you as you’d introduced yourself to him. Joel didn’t dare look at your face, or he’d say something stupid, so he didn’t. He looked at your joined hands, his brain trying to remember the last time someone had held his hand as gently as you did, your thumb running over the back of it soothingly.
He can’t remember. His hands are always empty.
With your other hand, a finger curled around the measuring tape, you slipped it around his wrist before leaning closer to look at the numbers.
“Is this too tight you think, or do you want them to be looser?” You asked through your lashes, eyes sparkling in the low morning light.
Joel cleared his throat, “No, that’s fine.”
“Okay,” you nodded, slipping the measuring tape from his wrist to write down the measurement. He hadn’t noticed your notebook until now. It was a little rough around the edges from use, the spined cracked and the paper a little yellow. Placing the pen in the seam, you grabbed the measuring tape again.
Loosening your grip on his hand you placed it over the thick of your thigh. Joel drew a quick breath, his heartbeat hammering in his ears, under his hand he could feel the warmth of you through the soft flannel.
You continued taking your measurements. You didn’t say anything, so neither did Joel, but you looked up at him through your lashes sometimes, and Joel thought that maybe the most useful thing one can do with empty hands, is hold on.
The creak of the stair made Joel jump, and like he’d been burned his hand retracted on reflex, as Arthur’s heavy steps got closer.
“Morning,” Arthur greeted as he ducked his head through the door to the living room.
“Mornin’,” Joel mumbled, head lowered as he gathered his hands in his lap.
“Good morning!” you smiled, always with that kind smile, “Did you sleep well, Arthur?” you got up from your seat before grabbing your teacup to follow Arthur into the kitchen, leaving the yarn and Joel.
Taking a deep breath, Joel pinched the top of his nose. He needed to get it together. You were just being your regular kind self; your soft touch was nothing more than that. Standing to his feet, Joel grabbed his own cup, trudging into the kitchen.
In the kitchen Arthur sat in his usual spot at the dining table, the chair closest to the window. “I need to get on with this barn soon,” Joel heard him say as he sat down opposite him. “It’s gonna fall apart come spring if we get as much snow as we did last year.”
Joel tried his best not to look at you as he heard you hum. You were stood at the kitchen counter slicing the bread Alma had baked yesterday, readying breakfast. Instead, Joel opted to gaze down into his teacup, where the peppermint leaves had all gathered at the bottom.
“Um,” Joel cleared his throat, “what needs fixin’?”
“What doesn’t need fixing in that barn?” Arthur sighed, peeling his eyes from out the window to Joel.
“I can uh,” Joel eyes shifted quickly to you before he cleared his throat again, “I can take a look at it, if ya want?”
Arthur’s eyebrows met in a furrow as he looked at Joel.
“I used to be a contractor,” Joel explained with a shrug, before taking a last cold sip of his tea.
“So, you know a thing or two about buildings I reckon?” Arthur asked.
“Yeah, well I used to,” Joel leaned back in his chair.
“Well, that would be very helpful Joel– I’d appreciated it!” Arthur smiled before leaning back in his chair making room for you as you started setting the table. Joel gave him a short nod in return, trying to fight the urge to look at you as you placed the food on the table.
Arthur had downplayed the state of the barn – it was a mess – it was dangerous, and had Joel told him as much. But it was nothing Joel couldn’t fix, as long as he had the right supplies, fortunately for him the forest would provide them with what they needed.
Thwack. Thwack. Thwack.
The axe dug a deep wound into the bark with every swing. Joel’s breath was heavy, and his arms ached, but it was a welcomed form of tiredness. A month into it, he was starting to get used to the work. There was something so satisfying about manual labor, of using his hands, of making something – he’d almost forgotten.
The routine of the work felt good. Waking up at dawn, then breakfast, he could use his body for something useful for the first time in twenty years and end the day with a warm meal for supper. This new temporary life was simple, but it was strangely normal.
Originally, Joel was only helping Arthur out in the woods for firewood through the winter– but now with the barn, they’d changed course. The last few days they’d started to become more selective with the trees; looking for the tallest and straightest ones that would fall safely.
A frozen sky hovered over the men as they worked. This morning when Joel had woken up, the thinnest layer of snow had fallen like powdered sugar during the night, turning the world bright with winter. Earlier in the week the frost had perched on the farm, and Joel had known winter was closing in. He’d lost count of the days and months passing while on his own, but Arthur had told him it was late October.
“It will start snowing properly soon,” Arthur said, breaking the silence between them.
Joel hummed before taking a bite of his packed lunch. They’d worked all morning – Joel felling the trees and Arthur cleaning them up and removing the branches. Now they were sat on a fresh tree stump each, their first break of the day.
“I have an old logging sled in the barn– used to be my father’s,” Arthur explained, “I think we should leave the trees here until the snow gets deep enough for the sled and have the horses pull them back to the farm.”
“Fine by me,” Joel took another bite of his lunch.
“The logs will have to dry out over the winter,” Arthur mused, “Then come spring we can start the repairs on the barn.”
Spring. If everything goes according to plan, Joel won’t be here come spring. He needed to find Tommy– he couldn’t, and he wasn’t gonna stay on the farm for any longer than necessary. He’d already decided– when the snow finally started to melt, Joel was gone.
Joel hummed, a non-committed answer. It was easier that way, to not get Arthur’s hopes up. He liked Arthur, he was a good man, a hard worker even in his old age, and silent when Joel wanted him to be. Joel liked Alma too, but her age shined through more easily than Arthur’s. Joel couldn’t help but notice her repeating herself more often and forgetting where she put things. It made life harder for you, Joel could see it. Your responsibilities were already a lot to handle as you took care of the animals mostly by yourself, but as Joel had discovered Alma starting to struggle with the housework, he’d noticed you starting to help her more often. In Joel’s mind it was unfair to you, but it wasn’t like he could blame Alma for growing older, in this world it was a feat.
Still, he’d try his best to help you when he could, like doing the dishes after dinner as you dried them off and put them away. The first few times you were both quiet, it was strangely intimate, only the sound of splashing water filling the space between you. One night he'd gotten brave, breaking the comfortable silence and asked you ‘What you thinkin’ about, sweetheart?’ You’d looked at him with big eyes, searching his own for something, but before he could figure out what it was, you’d answered him with a shrug. It was unlike you, unlike you to be this silent, but Joel didn’t push. The next night the silence persisted, and he’d thought adding ‘Sweetheart’ had been too much, but then the next night you’d sighed quietly and whispered, “I’m worried about Alma.”
Looking down at the mittens in his lap, the guilt gnawed at him. The look of worry in your eyes, Arthur’s hopeful wishes, and Alma’s aging. Joel couldn’t have anything tying him to this place. He was supposed to find his brother.
Suddenly, a black and orange butterfly landed on Joel’s knee. Joel stopped breathing, body going rigid as he tried not to move. How the hell was this butterfly still alive? It sat quiet on his knee, wings slowly retracting and widening behind it. Memories pushed its way to the forefront of Joel’s mind then.
Sarah. Another year had gone by, and the thought made his chest tighten.
“That’s quite a sight at this time of year,” he heard Arthur say, “Beautiful, aren’t they?”
“Y-yeah,” Joel stammered out an answer, afraid his voice would scare it away.
The longer Joel watched the butterfly he found his guilt started to slowly melt away. It’s okay, dad. It was like the rustling of the trees carried her voice with them. You’re on the right path.
“I can do that f’you want, sweetheart.”
Joel’s boots creaked under him as he walked across the barnyard. You looked up at the sound of his voice, smile blossoming across your face as you tightened your grip on the shovel.
“It’s alright,” you said with a grunt as you picked up more snow, adding it to the growing pile, “Good for me to get some physical work in.”
Joel nodded as you straightened up, hand going to your hip while the other leaned on the shovel, your heavy breath curled in small plumes out of your mouth. You took him in for a second, eyes flickering over his form before they fell on the rabbits hanging over Joel’s shoulder.
“Where’d you get those?” you asked, and Joel shrugged.
“Shot ‘em,” he said simply, “they walked right by me as I was choppin’– seemed too good to pass up.”
“Not for the rabbits,” you muttered, and Joel had to fight the urge to smile.
“You a vegetarian or somethin’?” he asked with a single raised eyebrow, and you waved him off.
“No,” you said pointedly, but a teasing lilt lingered, “Just stating a fact... we don’t eat a lot of rabbit around here, is all.”
Joel nodded slightly; it made sense. He knew there was a gun in the house, but it was a revolver– too small to do any real hunting, and Joel didn’t even know if there were bullets for it. So, Joel didn't ask further. Lucky for him, you did.
“So, you just shot those?” you asked, a frown pulling at your eyebrows, “Aren’t they fast?”
Joel made a nonchalant sort of face. “Ain’t that hard when you can aim straight.”
“Well, how do you aim straight?”
“You learn to shoot.”
You let out a small laugh, one that pulled at Joel’s lips. “And how did you go about learning that?”
Joel felt his smile drop, the leather strap of his shotgun weighing heavy on his shoulder, “Practice.”
You didn’t seem to notice the change in his demeanor as you dug the shovel into the snow, so it stood by itself like a watchman. “Can you teach me?” you asked, the snow creaking under your shoes as you took a few steps closer.
His lips pulled at the corner, “No.”
Your eyes widened with disappointment, eyebrows pulling together in a frown as you asked, “Why?”
“Nothin’ good ever comes from it,” Joel shrugged.
“Okay,” you huffed a laugh, “that’s sinister.” Then you narrowed your eyes at him, gearing up for an argument no doubt with the way you rested your hand on your hip. “What if I also wanted to go hunting?” you posed, and Joel shook his head.
“That ain’t happenin’, sweetheart.”
“Okay, but now you’ve brought us rabbits– and what if I end up really liking rabbit?” you bit down on your bottom lip, unconsciously showing off you own rabbit teeth.
Cute.
“Then I’ll shoot as many rabbits as you want,” Joel countered with a teasing smile before tightening his hold on the rope slung over his other shoulder (the one he’d tied the rabbits to), and walked towards the kitchen door at the back of the farmhouse.
He heard you huff in defeat behind him, your creaky steps following him up the stairs and inside. Walking into the kitchen Joel placed the rabbits on the table before he pulled at his mittens, stripped off his jacket, and hung it neatly over the back of one of the dining chairs. Grabbing one of the rabbits he brought it to the kitchen counter to start dressing it, fighting the urge to turn his head as he heard you enter the room.
“Come on, Joel,” you whined, “Why won’t you teach me?”
“Told you already,” Joel replied, “Nothin’ good comes from learnin’ to shoot things.”
Shifting the rabbit around on the counter he reached for the butcher knife in the knife block.
“You know, that’s a really stupid way of saying you don’t want to spend the time,” you told him, your voice closer now as you leaned against the kitchen counter.
“When exactly did ya hear me sayin’ I don't wanna spend time with you?” Joel asked, his eyebrows pulled together in a frown.
“You won’t teach me to shoot,” you teased, and Joel could hear the smile in your voice.
Joel huffed out a laugh, “Damn right I won’t.”
He heard you let out a whiney huff, before you turned on your heel, muttering out a curse under your breath when you accidently bumped your hip into the counter and Joel couldn’t help the smile teasing at his lips. You sat down with an overdramatic sigh, and Joel still didn’t look at you – he knew he’d cave eventually if he did, say yes against his better judgement – so he kept his eyes on the knife in his hand.
“How’s Arthur?” Joel asked as he worked.
“I don’t know,” you sighed, “The same I think– Alma was up there looking after him last time I checked.”
This time Joel allowed himself to look at you. You sat sideways on the wooden chair, legs crossed and tucked under your chair with your head hanging, eyes glued to your lap. Gone were the teasing, and gone were the smiles.
“He’ll be fine,” Joel said, his eyes back on the rabbit, “it’s just a cold.”
“Yeah… but he’s been getting sick a lot more often,” your voice was low, like you didn’t want them to hear you upstairs, “you can’t help but think the worst you know?”
Joel put the knife down and moved over to the sink. He quickly washed his hands before grabbing a towel to dry off, twisting it in his hands as he approached you. Placing the towel on the counter, he hesitated for a moment as he watched you, watched the way you twisted your hands in your lap with no sense of purpose or intent. It was like the worry dripped down your body. Pushing off the counter Joel knelt in front of you, a grunt escaped him as his knees clicked loudly, his balance slightly off on his haunches.
“Shit,” Joel huffed out a laugh, and you followed. Your palms landed on his knees to keep him steady, warmth spreading like jolting electricity.
“Sweetheart, I’ll tell you what–” he stopped himself when you looked at him through your lashes, trying to ignore the way your eyes focused on his mouth as he spoke. “’s just a cold, he’ll be up ‘n walkin’ tomorrow– man’s got gumption.”
“Yeah?” your eyes flickered upwards, meeting his.
Suddenly, under your gaze Joel felt brave. His hand moved on its own accord, cupping your cheek in his hand. He let his thumb ghost over your skin, still cold under his fingertips from being outside, but warming under his touch.
“Yeah, sweetheart.”
You didn’t say anything for a moment, you only watched him with glimmering eyes, like you were under a spell. Maybe he was too.
“Still,” you sighed, “Would be better if I could pick up more of the slack around here... Arthur does a lot, and I wish I could do more to support them.”
“Like what? You take care of the animals all by yourself– that’s more than enough.”
“Well, I could learn to shoot rabbits,” you told him, before the corners of your mouth pulled into a pleased smirk as he rolled his eyes at you.
Reluctantly, he pulled his hand away, making a move to stand when you grabbed his wrist, stopping him.
“I’m kidding, Joel,” you smiled, before a more serious look washed over your features. “I mean it’s… It’s gonna be empty here without you,” you said, “I’m starting to really like having you here, Joel.”
Joel turned his hand to rest the back of it on your thigh, your hand fitting in his.
“I uh,” his eyes fixated on your joined hands, then he cleared his throat, “I’ll stay as long as you need me to. I’m not leavin’ you alone, sweetheart.”
Your eyes lit up at his words, smile growing large across your face. Joel’s heart drummed in his chest as your eyes flickered down to his mouth again.
“Thank you,” you said in a low voice, and then you did something Joel thought was gonna make his heart stop beating. You leaned forward and pressed a soft kiss to his cheek. It bloomed against his skin, and made wings flutter against the walls of his stomach.
“You’re a good man, Joel Miller,” you whispered before you pulled away, looking at him with kindness in your eyes.
If only you knew, Joel thought, if only you knew the blood on his hands.
He couldn’t look at you when you looked at him like that. Like you believed your own words. So, he cleared his throat awkwardly and stood to his feet, his knees clicking as your hand slipped from his movement. He walked back to the counter, fingers grabbing the towel with no other purpose than to calm himself down.
After placing the towel back where it usually hung, he grabbed the knife again, turning his attention back to the rabbit, allowing himself to steal a few glances at you where you sat looking out the kitchen window.
“Hey, uh,” Joel broke the growing silence after a few minutes, “how ‘bout rabbit stew for lunch?”
Your head snapped to look at him as he spoke, a smile ghosting over your lips as you said, “I’ll go get some vegetables from the cellar.”
Joel wouldn’t necessarily call himself a good cook – he wouldn’t even call himself a cook in the first place. Back before the outbreak he’d been forced to learn the basics as a fresh single dad, but he’d never been able to provide Sarah with gourmet meals very often, and when Sarah had gotten older, he’d been embarrassed to say that her food was always better than his – eggshells and all. One summer he’d bought himself a nice grill– one of those way too expensive gas grills with too many fancy accessories for Joel to regularly use. He’d had a job that ended up paying well, some rich guy’s mansion that needed renovating, and decided to treat himself for once. That summer all their meals had come from that grill, well mostly, and afterwards Joel looked at himself as a pretty good griller, if nothing else.
You on the other hand, you knew what you were doing, it was clear in the effortlessly way you moved beside him as you got the vegetables ready for the stew. Joel seared the meat to the best of his abilities, making sure it was properly browned on both sides before setting it aside. After that, it was clear that you were in charge, and Joel let you boss him around and tell him what to do. It made his heart warm around the edges, watching how you put so much love and care into everything you did.
An hour later you finally sat down to eat; two hearty bowls of stew each as light snowflakes covered the world outside. You’d let the pot simmer on low over the heat as you’d wanted to bring up a bowl for Arthur and Alma later.
“So…” you started, watching as Joel dug into his bowl, “How’s the stew?”
“’s good!” Joel nodded through a mouthful, and he wasn’t lying. It was good, really good in fact.
“Yeah?” you bubbled through a smile, before you dug into your own bowl to see if he’d spoken the truth. He watched as you face brightened as you chewed, nodding your head to confirm his verdict.
“I think I really like rabbit, Joel,” you said through a teasing smile, and Joel couldn’t fight the chuckle from spilling.
“Yeah?”
“Yeah,” you nodded, teasing smile not going anywhere, “So… when are you teaching me to shoot?”
“Shut up.”
The living room was quiet, safe for the cracking of the fire. It had almost died out when Joel had stepped out of his room. He’d been twisting and turning again, counting sheep, but nothing had been able to pull him under the blanket of sleep. He was plumb tired too, that was the worst part. The embers hummed with a low light, and with a small stick Joel had spread them out before placing a small piece of wood on top. No less than a minute later the fire fed on the log.
Taking a seat and leaning back in the lounge chair, Joel looked out the window with tired eyes. The moon looked down on him, big and bright, it shone its white light over the barnyard like a spotlight. His thoughts were clouded over as he gazed up. A billion little lights turning into bright spheres in the sky.
On nights like this, Joel felt like he was barely breathing at all.
His thoughts didn’t stray for long before they found you again. Lately, you were always on his mind. He thought about how you’d looked mere hours ago, when he’d sat in this same exact chair, only this time it was facing towards the sofa and not the window.
You’d been sat curled up in the corner, blanket thrown over your lap with a book in hand. You’d told him you’d read all the books in the house already, but it didn’t stop you from coming back to your favorites. Joel had been reading his own book, an old western he’d found in the bookshelf in the upstairs hallway a few days ago. It was entertaining, but not enough to hold his attention. He found his eyes had a mind of their own, slipping over the top to steal a peek at you as you read, feeling a smile tug at his lips at the barely there furrow of concentration between your eyebrows.
“Joel.”
Joel perked up at the whisper of his name, the memories fading like ripples in still water. He looked around the room –nothing. He sat quietly in his chair for a moment, listening, as his heartbeat quickened in his chest. It had been your voice, hadn’t it? Or was he starting to lose it? His eyes fell to the door of your bedroom. He hadn’t noticed it until now, but he could see it was slightly ajar.
“Joel.”
The voice was louder this time, almost strained, but it was yours. A thousand scenarios flashed before his eyes then at your tone. Was there someone in your room? Were you in danger? Seconds later Joel crossed the room, a mix of fear and protectiveness overcoming him.
Leaning up against your door he listened for the intruder as he readied himself. The soft crinkling of your sheets combined with your strained whimpers was all it took for him to push the door open, fearing the worst.
And…
It was empty, your room, you were alone. Joel immediately felt stupid– the only intruder here was him.
He was about to step out, embarrassed at his actions, when he heard it again, his name falling from your lips. It was all Joel needed to finally take in your body, squirming under your sheets, still asleep. The realization of what he’d just walked in on made Joel’s eyes widen.
Laying on your back, the duvet had slipped down your torso from your movements to reveal the thin t-shirt you wore to bed. Like this he could see your perked nipples through the fabric, as your chest quickly rose and fell, making Joel’s imagination start to run wild.
“Joel.”
In his pajama pants, Joel could feel his cock come alive from the soft whimper that left your lips along with his name. He couldn’t move, like some farm elf had glued his feet to the floor while he wasn’t looking. He watched as you scrunched your face together in pleasure, another whimper falling from your lips, and all the blood in Joel’s body rushed down south.
As if the soundwaves from your voice had broken against him, he took a step backwards, and then another, and another until he crossed the threshold of your door. He tried his best to be quiet, to not wake you and have you catch him in your room in the middle of the night.
The image of you squirming under your sheets, dreaming of him, didn’t leave him as he closed the door to his own room. With a sigh his head fell against the door, a strong hand gliding down his front to hover over his aching cock.
Joel Miller was no saint, but what he was doing– what he was about to do, was bad.
“Shit,” he quietly hissed, running his hand up his clothed cock. He hadn’t touched himself properly in a long time, not since he left Boston.
His cock reacted to his touch, growing harder and harder until he couldn’t take it anymore. He hooked his finger around the hem of his pajama pants, pulling them down to the thick of his thigh, freeing himself. He hissed at the cold air hitting his length, as it bopped with the movement of being freed. Bringing his hand to his mouth, Joel spat, before he wrapped his spit-soaked hand around himself.
His mind found you again as he started stroking himself, slowly at first, pumping himself with a practiced hand, squeezing himself at the base before bringing his hand up to thumb at the tip. Joel couldn’t get the way you sounded out of his mind. Couldn’t forget how you were squirming in your bed, dreaming of him. Couldn’t shake the thought of pulling those moans and whimpers from you with his hands, and his mouth, and with his cock.
“Fuck.”
Joel tried to be quiet, but he couldn’t fight the moan from slipping from his lips. Fuck, he wanted you. He wanted his hands all over you. Closing his eyes his mouth dropped open as he imagined what he was dying to do to you.
How much he’d wanted to help you out of your t-shirt, run his hands over your breasts and tease your nipples. Take his time to pull those moans and whimpers from your soft lips as he teased you with kisses down your body, down the valley of your breasts, your tummy, down to you to your–
Another low moan fell from Joel’s lips. He squeezed himself tighter as he jerked himself off, precum pearling at the tip, and slipping down his length, mixing with his spit.
The sound of the slick rhythm of his hand filled his bedroom as he increased the pace of his strokes. He had to bite down on his lip to strangle a groan when thoughts of getting between your legs, spreading them open and getting his mouth on you filled his head. He fantasized about how you’d taste falling apart on his tongue–Fuck, how you’d sound falling apart around his cock.
His eyes fell shut as he fisted himself faster. Joel could feel his orgasm quickly building, coiling tight in his tummy. With his free hand he cupped his balls, and then he couldn’t help but imagine it was you, a picture of you on your knees before him flashed behind his eyelids, your tongue lapping at his balls while your hand pumped his cock.
“Shit.”
With a strained groan, thick ropes of cum spilled over his knuckles and down his length, coating him in his release. His breath came out ragged, as he continued his strokes, milking himself of the rest of his release.
Fuck.
His cock softened in his hand as he calmed down from his high. With a quiet groan he pushed himself off the door, looking around his room for something to clean himself up with.
The guilt of what he’d done washed over him quickly, settling in his chest like a heavy weight. You were so young, and beautiful, and Joel just an old man. He shouldn’t want you like this, shouldn’t want you this much.
Climbing under the covers, Joel couldn’t shake his thoughts of you, of you dreaming about him in your bed, about your smiles, and your touch. A supercut of you rolling like a tape in his minds eye. A supercut of you bundled up under a blanket on the sofa, knitting him his mittens. Of you, your own knitted hat pulled tightly down over your ears as you stepped out into the snow to check on the animals. Of the way you’d looked at him for the first time, with the bucket of apples under your arm, and the sweet taste of them as you’d offered him one later, after dinner.
Finally, Joel could breathe.
i hope someone liked this? if you did a comment, reply or an ask is always welcome and they make me super happy <3 other than that thank you for reading!!
#joel miller#joel miller x reader#joel miller x you#joel miller fanfiction#joel miller fanfic#joel miller smut#joel miller angst#joel miller fluff#tlou smut#tlou fanfiction#the last of us smut#the last of us fanfiction#pedro pascal
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YOU
I LIKE YOU @faislittlewhiteraven
These questions are a little hard to answer with doodles but I tried my best-
Nil generally has a pretty heroic and brave personality overall. She's loud and brash and ready to jump into things super quickly.
She's not the best with words, but she is very reliable overall
More art and writing under cut, it's just a long post man-
In terms of helping about during travels, she likes doing a lot of heavy labor jobs- She's the type to fix broken fences, gather supplies for folks, carry stuff around, tend to crops or lend a help wrangling animals. Nil wouldn't be great at things like sorting and organizing tho- Just tell her what you need and where to put it and she will!
I mentioned she's not really the best with words (she is very emotionally intelligent just sometimes struggles to communicate stuff), HOWEVER, With folks that have been frozen she connects with a lot.
How it's scary that you've been frozen for so long when your entire belief is to change and evolve, how (if Mal Du Pays is anything to go by) they had to fight their own demons in there, how everything can change so easily without you even noticing- It's terrifying to think about.
Actually- a while ago I made battle sprites with Nil- I wasn't happy with them so I never shared them BUT
Specifically I wanted to contrast her frozen sprite with everyone else's- Cause if she were to SOMEHOW be frozen again, knowing what it feels like, what could happen while she's out- It would TERRIFY her instantly. Not just a mild shock or surprise, it would stick with her for a while-
Speaking of battles tho-
Nil is super brash and lively as a whole. She puts up a brave face for a LOT of things, including fighting. She jumps in without really thinking, and as long as it goes their way, she'd have a smile on her face doing it.
However, while brave, it does come from both a place of coping and naivety. She's not used to genuine fighting, in fight or flight situations she actually tends to flee. (Which is why honestly, if she had to fight the King I don't think she could do it-)
If a battle were to start going south, she'd actually start to panic more then anyone else- Physical wounds and seeing the people she loves hurt would lower her accuracy and general capabilities, despite the brave face she puts on.
And due to her lack of experience, especially in bigger groups-
Nil tends to... miscalculate sometimes
She had to learn the hard way not to just jump at any opportunity she sees.
The party can see where Bonnie got it from (also after the battle Nille proceeded to heal Sif, profusely apologizing, I forgot to doodle that whoops-) (Also gameplay wise, imagine every second turn she does an action of her own without your command)
Also just the Sif image by itself cause I liked it :]
As for chores and stuff-
She does foraging and stuff!
Honestly I don't think the other 5 would have done so before they traveled together.
Mira would have most DEFINITELY learned about it but didn't feel confident in her abilities.
Bonnie will grab stuff they think is edible from what they remember Nille telling them and they'd grab a stick to cook.
Odile would not be interested and would prefer buying the ingredients rather then wild scavenging.
Isa doesn't read to me as a biology student, I see him more of a math history type of guy, so either he doesn't know, or him and Mira did it occasionally together, but only as a last resort type of deal (maybe when it was just the two of them and they had to manage alone)
And Sif in my mind is an accident prone goober who'd forget which ones are edible and which ones aren't so I wouldn't trust him personally.
SO! LONG STORY SHORT! I don't think any of them are really experienced with foraging. And as a means to make money management easier- I imagine Nil (nature being a passion of sorts to her) took up the mantle! Probably taught the rest how to do it too!
That's it when it comes to stuff specific to her- Other then that she's kind of ready to help out with anything! She can help set up tends, do odd jobs for money, help cook if for WHATEVER reason Bonnie wanted her to or wanted to do something else in that time, bring water, wood, fish, help with weapons- She's not the best at those things, but if anyone needs a hand to be lent- she is there!
I'll be entirely honest, I don't think I understand your last question-
But I do wanna say that Nil and Isa become like. Best buds real quick. He is the first one she instantly trusts, since she rivals with Mira, is prickly with Odile and Sif is someone she wants to help rather then ask for help. So if she needs someone to turn to, or needs a partner in crime- Nil would turn to Isa
And now I just imagined Mira and Nil bonding over how to grow plants. Cause Mira tried REALLY REALLY HARD and couldn't do it, so Nille would actually love to give some tips- Imagine Mira genuinely walking up to her with a little alive plant with a proud glint in her eyes and have Nil fully support her-
Honestly I could keep going for forever, I have so many thoughts on her and her dynamic with everyone-
Bro I even have nicknames, you don't even know-
BUT I'M GONNA CUT IT HERE, HAVE FUN, I'VE BROUGHT SOME FOOD FOR NOW-
#isat#isat spoilers#in stars and time spoilers#only cause of mal du pays tho honestly#in stars and time#isat nille#isat sif#isat mira#isat petronille#in stars and time nille#in stars and time petronille#lord give me strenght (its 5am I am not awake-)
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loml
pairing: max verstappen x reader
summary: a journey through your relationship with max
a/n: so for a little background... my ex (he wasn't an F1 fan, it was never gonna work, let's be real) broke up with me the night before this album was released, so writing this series has been very healing; however, this one was extremely difficult to write bc it's the only song i can't analytically listen to and find the deeper meanings yet, especially after losing your first love. sorry for the rant and making this short🙃
tw: emotional abuse, manipulation
masterlist ttpd masterlist
________
You and Max were fan favorites, it was evident to anyone with eyes who had eyes. But they say you never know what happens behind closed doors.
“She’s the love of my life,” Max would always say about you, looking at you like you held the universe in the palm of your hand. His fans could recite your love story by heart from how much he loved to talk about you. It only made sense that he could shatter that public opinion.
“Y/n and I have divorced, I would like to ask for privacy as we navigate the changes,” Max posted one day, his socials wiped of everything. Your accounts remained the same, your last post being from the fateful race months ago. You haven’t posted since. The fans should’ve realized when the WAGs and George unfollowed Max.
Your apartment was full of things that reminded you of Max, every time you walked in it reminded you of every memory. He was embroidered in everything. You look at a printed photo of when you first met him. Despite it being six months later, you couldn’t get rid of him.
~~~
All it took was locking eyes with him across the pier for you to fall in love on that breezy summer day. He walked up to you and asked you to join him, and you did. You kissed him at the top of the ferris wheel later that night, and you didn’t even know he was famous all you knew was that he made you feel safe. The breeze reminded you of the warm ocean breeze from that day, one you called the winds of fate.
Despite being young, you married him after a year of being together. Things weren’t perfect even then, he could be incredibly mean, but he was also a standup guy when it mattered. That erased any wrongdoing of his.
“You have made me a better man, you reformed me, the love of my life,” Max had said that fall evening, repeating the one line that brought you back to him every time.
You believed his words, his lies spun to make you believe the hell you were living in was actually heaven. When he takes his anger out at you, doesn’t defend you against his father, you start to second guess him but he calls you those four words.
“I’ll never leave you, Schatje,” Max holds you in his arms, your back against his chest as you both look at a tv in the Paddock. The fans loved that photo, calling your love legendary. They didn’t know about the growing hole in your heart.
Your marriage was looking like one of those black and white movies you and Max watch on snowy winter afternoons. You and Max had been talking about starting a family, but you couldn’t get pregnant and you were watching everything you loved slip away.
“God, Max, you are like a con-man. I feel like I’ve been sold a get-love-quick scheme. What happened to you?” you ask, voice laced with hurt, during an argument about it. Max just ignored you, pushing past to stream with some friend. He ignored the sobs coming from your bedroom. He told the chat that you are the love of his life when asked about you.
“Y/n, we need to talk,” some of the WAGs pulled you aside during a race. They told you how Max was shit talking you to other drivers, saying you were a waste of a wife for your inability to get pregnant, saying he should’ve never married you, pointing out every flaw he told you was beautiful when he was lying to your face. You stand up and leave, not saying a word even when the girls try to stop you. Max is confused but simply responds to your text saying you were sick with an okay.
You are laying in your bed sobbing when Max gets back from the race. You face the terrace, where you and Max would dance under the stars. You can see the ghosts of it through your tears, and you wished you could un-recall when you thought you had everything.
“Please get out of bed,” Max says, his concerned tone laced with venom. Maybe the ghosts of your relationship are embarrassed by the scene on the other side of the glass.
“No,” you cry, mourning the loss of your counterfeit relationship.
“I’ll be back in a few hours,” Max sighs leaving the room. You sent a text to the WAG group chat who helped you remove all your belongings from Max’s apartment into George’s apartment that he wasn’t using at the moment.
Your phone is flooded with messages from Max, so you turn it off unless you are talking to your lawyer. Max finds a divorce petition and your apartment key on the dining room table when he comes home from training a few days later. The relationship that had such a valiant roar ended with the blandest goodbye.
You sit in George’s apartment with Carmen and Lily drinking wine. You took over George’s lease after they insisted that you did.
“For someone who claims to be a lion, he sure is a manipulative coward,” Carmen says as the three of you comb through the years of lies he spun.
You took the dreams that you thought you and Max wanted and lit the match to destroy them with your divorce papers. Despite your somber eyes, you seem more at peace, even with the sadness you will carry with you until you die.
“He’s the loss of my life.”
#f1 imagines#f1 x reader#f1 imagine#f1 grid#max verstappen#max verstappen imagines#max verstappen imagine#max verstappen x reader#george russell
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Covering the Classics Part 12 | Bob Floyd x OC
Summary: When Anna noticed that a new poem by her favorite, amateur writer had been posted, she was afraid to read the finality in his tone. But Bob always managed to surprise her. And maybe she could find a way to surprise Kevin, too.
Warnings: Angst, Kevin is a dick, adult language, 18+
Length: 3600 words
Pairing: Robert "Bob" Floyd x Female OC (this story is part of the Beer Boy/Sugar and Jake/Jessica universe)
Covering the Classics masterlist. Check my masterlist for more!
After that, it was radio silence. Anna didn't reach out to Bob, and he didn't try to either. He went to the Hard Deck on Friday night and lasted about an hour before excusing himself. Nobody asked him why he was bailing after one ginger ale and a single cup of peanuts, and that was enough to tell him that everyone knew. Everyone knew he slept with Anna. Everyone knew she was married. Everyone knew that they shouldn't talk about it in front of him for fear that the ladies would snap their necks. Even Nat was being very kind and considerate which wasn't really like her at all.
When Bob was halfway to the door, he felt a small hand curl around the back of his bicep. "I'll see you tomorrow night for D&D?"
He nodded down at Jessica's hopeful face. "Yeah. I can pick you up if you want."
Her face brightened a little bit. "I'll text you in the morning." He turned to walk out, and her hand slid down his arm. "Hey, Bob? Don't give up hope on her, okay?"
He didn't know how to respond, so he just kept walking. He had no idea what to say or what to think. It wasn't like he could stop loving someone overnight. He didn't really want to either. Anna's life was quite frankly messier than he had ever expected. She did a pretty good job of hiding it from everyone, and it seemed like she would have continued down that path if they didn't have sex. And that was the other issue; it wasn't just sex to Bob. Anna knew about the things he tried to hide himself, and she seemed to want him in that moment anyway.
Her words from the previous night made him ache.
'You're perfect. You're Sky Writing. You're the handsome man from the bookstore who smells like tea and soap. You're Bob, the guy my friends knew I would fall in love with as soon as I met them.'
If that meant she was in love with him or that she thought she could be someday, then he was afraid to walk away from her. But now he was terrified of getting hurt or somehow hurting Anna like Kevin had. Part of him believed if he could just see Anna's husband with his own eyes, confirm that he was exactly the way she described him, then he might be able accept that she just needed time to settle her divorce and to heal. If that was the case, he wanted to make it work.
In the meantime, when he got home, he ended up standing in his living room, staring at his bookshelf before going upstairs and staring at his bed. He could still picture her red hair all spread out for him. He could still feel it between his fingers as the silky strands slid along his palm. He could taste her on his tongue. He could hear her telling him what she wanted.
Bob picked up his computer and slipped under the covers, knowing he wasn't going to be able to sleep right now.
----------------------------
It had been there since early Saturday morning. A new one. Anna desperately wanted to read it and memorize it like she had the others, but she was afraid to face the finality. Her email alert mocked her every time she looked at it.
Sky Writing has posted a new, original work! Click the link below to check out the subscriber that you follow!
Bob wrote a new poem, and she didn't think she could handle reading exactly how he viewed her now. He'd never be like Kevin, openly belittling her or putting her down, but she knew the shiny packaging had been removed now, and he saw what was really inside. Just a mess of a human. She put off reading it and put off reading it, but when she was sitting at her desk at work on Monday, she made herself decide between reading the new poem or calling Kevin. After a fairly short debate, she decided to read the poem. It was probably so bad, calling Kevin later wouldn't even feel painful in comparison.
She tapped on the link in her email and was taken to something so unexpected, she gasped as she read it.
There is empty space on my bookshelf,
The one I bought with you in mind.
I didn't know it was for you at the time,
But one night made it obvious,
Before an instance took it.
Reality surpassed intention today.
Your worn favorites and mine pristine,
Should mingle and mix,
Genre forgotten.
Dog eared pages became so endearing.
But I'll never see them on my shelf,
Unless you come back and stay this time.
The format was different from what he usually wrote, but it was so obviously Sky Writing. So obviously Bob. So obviously about her. And he didn't sound angry. Could he possibly miss her after everything she did and said?
She jumped when her phone vibrated on her desk, and for a split second, she believed it could be Bob. Her heart beat faster with anticipation, but it was from somebody else.
Jessica Reed: If you don't come down to this weird tree right now, we're going to come up and get you.
Anna had lost track of time. It was after noon now. She knew that her friends were trying to make sure she was holding herself together after she refused to go to the Hard Deck over the weekend. How could she continue to go somewhere that Bob had the rights to first? It wasn't until she read his Sky Writing poem that she thought perhaps there was a chance he might not only be okay with her presence but perhaps even miss her like she missed him.
With her sad little lunch in hand, she dragged herself down to the quad, trying to decide when was the best time to call Kevin. She was tired of going through lawyers who couldn't seem to get him to budge, and each ninety day window just ate away at more of her soul. She should have been so much more careful with her writing when she had the opportunity, and now he'd completely locked her out of being able to access it.
No, she was going to have to beg him, plead with him, anything it took to get what she wanted without giving away where she'd moved. Maybe if he agreed to let her have her manuscript, one of her friends would let her borrow money for a flight back to New Jersey to retrieve it. She was getting ahead of herself, but she couldn't help it. She needed to at least get this one thing.
"There she is!"
Anna looked up to see her friends directly in front of her on the bench by the tree, and the fact that they both looked happy to see her made her heart ache. "Hi," she said softly as she sat down between them when they both scooted over.
"Hummus?" her friend asked, passing along a container while she bit into her perfect looking chicken salad sandwich on artisan bread. Anna accepted a few bites of Bradley's gourmet snack, because she was absolutely starving today.
"Thanks," she murmured, and she let herself sink into the background a little bit as the two other women continued the conversation they'd been having. Now that she was down here with his friends, she couldn't stop thinking about Bob again. His soft hair and his kind eyes. The way he always paid attention to her when she was talking. How good he made her feel.
She listened to her friends argue about alumni weekend for a few minutes before she finally cut them off to ask, "Has Bob said anything about me?" Both of them looked at her, and she quickly added, "I can't stop thinking about him."
Jessica smiled softly and said, "Not a word, but I've never seen him look so sad. And I mean that in a good way, because although I know he's confused and hurt, I'm pretty sure he just misses you."
"But," the other woman quickly cut in, "the most important thing right now is making sure you take care of yourself. Even if you are in love with Bob."
"Oh!" Jessica exclaimed. "I have an idea! We could just kill Kevin!"
Anna snorted in spite of herself. "That would actually solve a lot of my problems. Maybe even all of them."
"Only one problem with that," Advanced Calculus said blandly. "You're not a killer, Jessica."
"I could kill someone," Jessica muttered under her breath, and truly Anna almost laughed, because Jessica Reed was one of the gentlest people she'd ever met. The most violent thing about her was her Dungeons & Dragons character. "I could at least probably slap him."
"He wouldn't know what hit him," Anna said, and all three women erupted into laughter. And it felt so strange to feel genuine happiness, even if it only lasted for a few seconds, that Anna almost started crying. As their amusement died down, she asked her friends, "Do you think.... Bob would respond if I texted him?"
Jessica squeaked, and then both women said, "Yes."
---------------------------
Bob was back to square one. Back at the bookstore. He was fifteen minutes early. He was already looking through the Classics. He was about to meet up with Anna. He was nervous.
Nat scoffed when he told her where he was going, and he truly did appreciate that his friend wanted him to proceed with caution, but she just didn't understand how Anna made him feel. Being friends with her after sleeping together a total of one time might kill him, but he knew that was probably all he could have now.
It was almost like he could sense that she was there. He looked up from the Shakespeare volume in his hand, and he saw her walk in the door. As he got closer to the loft railing, he saw her glance up and meet his eyes like it was some depraved version of Romeo and Juliet. She mouthed the word Hi before she headed for the stairs, and in less than a minute, she was standing right in front of him.
Anna looked nervous, but everything else was just the same. Those perfect freckles decorated her face. Her brown eyes were bright. Her pretty hair was in a messy braid. He saw her burgundy nail polish as she fidgeted with her denim jacket. He wanted to know if she still thought he was the kind of person she could love. He wanted to ask her if her husband was any closer to signing papers. Instead he said, "I was surprised when you texted me."
Her eyes went wide, and he wished he could shove his foot in his mouth as she started looking around anywhere but at his face. "I need some books for my feminist literature course, and I just thought maybe you'd like more books for your bookshelf."
Had she read his newest poem? It was a sloppy one that he wrote late on Friday night and posted on a whim. She could have deleted her account by now or vowed never to read anything else by Sky Writing. But that didn't stop the poem from being about her.
"I do need some more books for my shelves," he replied, and her eyes finally settled on his again. "And you don't have to be nervous around me. I know you're dealing with a lot, and I promise I won't touch you or anything."
Now she just looked sad and distraught, but she nodded and turned down the very aisle where they first met. Bob had to fight to keep a few feet of space between them as she said, "I'm looking for Mary Wollstonecraft, Charlotte Perkins Gilman, and Elizabeth Cady Stanton."
They worked their way slowly up and back down each aisle, falling into a natural conversation in spite of the awkwardness between them. In spite of the way Bob couldn't keep himself from looking at her as she ran her fingers along the spines. When she wanted something that was on a top shelf, he reached it down for her. When her hands got full, he offered his up for her use. And to his delight and also sadness, she kept recommending books for him along the way. That's how he ended up with Miss Pettigrew Lives For a Day as well as The Importance of Being Earnest in his hand when she led the way downstairs to pay.
Bob cleared his throat as Anna reached into her pocket for some cash. "I can get them."
Her brown eyes snapped up to meet his, and her cheeks turned pink. He already knew what Kevin did, and while he didn't think there was any harm in saying it, he could tell that she at least had her pride intact. "The college is going to reimburse me," she said firmly before handing forty dollars across the counter.
"Right," Bob said before paying for his own books. When they walked out into the fading sunlight, he looked down into her pretty face. "Will you let me drive you home? Not because I think I need to, but because I want to?"
She seemed at war with herself as she looked across the street and pressed her lips together. But her eyes fluttered closed and she said, "I would really appreciate that."
The interior of his truck was quiet the whole way as their books sat on the seat between them. Only the soft hum of the radio helped Bob hold his thoughts at bay. The ride wasn't too long, and when they were most of the way there, Anna finally spoke.
"I'm going to deal with my shit. I promise."
Unsure exactly how he should respond, Bob simply said, "Okay."
When he pulled up in front of her building, he turned toward her, intending to ask if she wanted him to walk her up, but she was gathering her books together as she said, "I don't know how you feel about me now. I don't know if you could want me again. But I am going to deal with Kevin. I am going to fix my life. Because I want to move on. I need to." When he was so flustered that he didn't immediately respond, Anna said, "You know where to find me. Thanks for the ride."
He watched her run up the sidewalk before struggling to open the door with her arms full, and then she ducked inside when he finally figured out what he wanted to say. "I'll find you."
-------------------------------
If Anna even had a hope or a prayer at a chance with Bob ever again, she needed to work up the nerve. A real chance with him now that he knew all about her disastrous marriage was what she wanted, but she needed to sort Kevin out first.
As far as she could tell, everything came down to two options: keep her freedom by giving Kevin ownership of her manuscript, or keep her self worth by fighting until she didn't have anything left to give up. And both of them sounded terrifying. The whole weekend passed where she tried so many times to call him. She took her phone out again and again, let her thumb hover over her husband's phone number, and then chickened out. His voice was like a distant memory, and she didn't want to bring it back to the forefront of her mind. He hadn't reached out one time since she up and left without telling him where she was going, and she was afraid to let him know where she was now.
The worst part was, he would know immediately why she was calling. He knew that he had the one thing she wanted. He cut off her access to the cloud files where she should have been able to piece her writing back together. It would have been time consuming, but she would have been all too happy to do it. She should have known better than to let him have so much of her life and so many of her resources in only his name, but there was a time when she trusted him. That was the part that made her so sick. She had trusted her husband, and now look where it got her.
A shiver went through her body as she woke up for work too early on Monday morning. She wanted Kevin's computer where everything was saved. She wanted access to the cloud. She didn't want a damn penny from him otherwise. She was aggressively brushing her teeth, wishing she had more to eat than a granola bar when she spit out her toothpaste and rinsed her mouth.
She hated him. She hated him so much, she was going to call him right now. Without a backward glance, she marched over to where her phone was charging and pulled the cable out. Before she could even think about exactly what she was going to say, she tapped on his stupid name.
Anna was breathing fast and deep, her heart pounding in her ears when she heard his voice for the first time in so many months.
"Anna?" he asked, her whole body cringing after just one word. His voice was scratchy as if she had woken him up, but it was 9:16 in New Jersey. He should be on his way to work if not there already.
"Kevin," she snapped, gripping her phone tighter. She was getting angrier by the second as she listened to him yawn while she looked around her tiny apartment.
His tone was condescending as he said, "Of course you'd call me at six in the fucking morning after I haven't hear a word from you except through a lawyer since July. What the hell do you want?"
She couldn't do this. She couldn't talk to him. While she felt strong a few minutes ago, her resolve was already crumbling. She wanted to tell him that he knew damn well what she wanted, but then she zeroed in on what he said. "What do you mean it's six in the morning? It's after nine."
His voice was suddenly loud and harsh. "I meant exactly what I said. I'm in California for a medical convention. Now get to the point of your call."
Her mouth felt like sandpaper as she carefully put her phone on speaker. She started searching for Neurological conventions in California while she told him, "I just want my manuscript. Please, Kevin. That's all I want, and then you can be rid of me."
The bite was gone from his voice, replaced by a lazy tone, and he spoke to her as if she were a very simple child. "It's not going to happen, Anna. I didn't cut off access to it for no reason. It's worth money. You can pay me for it, or you can kiss it goodbye. I might even publish it myself."
She was gasping for air as she scrolled through her search results, coming up with a conference in Carlsbad that was starting today. As the page loaded, she swallowed and told him, "I'll sue you if you do." But even she knew she was full of shit.
"What what money, Anna? I'm surprised you can still afford your lawyers. I don't even want to know what you're doing to make ends meet right now."
Then she saw it. She saw his name. He was a keynote speaker at the National Neurological Physicians Association conference. He was less than an hour away. She sank down to her knees in surprise and fear. Her mind was swirling with information and ideas, and she couldn't even comprehend what Kevin was saying now.
"What?" she gasped.
"I said come up with some money for me, or I'm not signing shit." Then he ended the call as her hands started shaking. She dropped her phone onto her bed. He was in Carlsbad. Maybe she could surprise him. Maybe she could talk him into it easier in person.
Anna had to run to the bathroom to be sick, but her mind was made up. Once she cleaned herself up again, she tearfully made the decision to cancel her morning classes via email, and then she started grabbing her purse and her essentials. She folded up the newest copy of the divorce paperwork her lawyer had emailed to her and tucked it away. Then she ran for the bus stop, nearly tripping several times as she read through the schedule of speakers who were at the conference this week on her phone. If she caught a bus within the next fifteen minutes, she might make it in time to see Kevin right before he gave his welcome speech.
---------------------------
We will meet Kevin in the next chapter. Now is an acceptable time to start sharpening your knives. Bob, please don't give up on Anna. Thanks @beyondthesefourwalls
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DOMESTIC 141 + KÖNIG HEADCANONS
Pairings: Captian John Price, Simon ‘Ghost’ Riley, Johnny ‘Soap’ MacTavish, Kyle ‘Gaz’ Garrick, König x fem!reader (she/her)
Summary: Random headcanons of what TF141 + König are like domestically/ as fathers.
Warnings: Deployment, pure domestic fluff
Word count: 1000+
A/N: Choosing baby genders based on what I can picture more. I appreciate feedback! Let me know what you think :)
Likes and reblogs are much appreciated! Copying and reposts are not! My fics are only posted on tumblr, under this sideblog @hotmencoreplus for the account, @hotmencore
CAPTAIN JOHN PRICE
‣ Definitely 1 girl, 1 boy.
‣ Is very big on respect. If either of them disrespect you, shout, or start being bratty, he is right on it.
‣ Got his boy into football at a young age, and is the loudest dad out of them all. He will be shouting to him on the field just like when he barks out orders to rookies.
‣ Always wants to go on fishing trips. Always. I feel like it would be something him and his daughter do more than anyone.
‣ He isn’t big on technology at all. Pretty much just because he just can’t wrap his head around it.
‣ I imagine him keeping up with the new iPhone models, but would not change a thing about them. This man has default everything on his phone (apart from his lock screen of you and the kids).
‣ He is 100% one of them dads that never know what to call airpods.
‣ “What was it he wanted for Christmas? Airbuds? Earpods? iBuds?”
‣ “Airpods, John.”
SIMON ‘GHOST’ RILEY
‣ 3 girls. You cannot convince me otherwise. And he definitely secretly hoped for all girls.
‣ When Simon is home from deployment, they go to him for everything.
‣ Nightmares? You will wake up in the morning to find him missing from your bed, only to find him asleep, half hanging off of one of their beds with his arms round them on his chest, snoring loud.
‣ Simon is so usually on edge, though has learnt to zone his girls out when they are arguing.
‣ “Dad, tell her I’m right.”
‣ “Hm?”
‣ He especially zones out when his oldest girl is talking about school drama. He isn’t listening to a word of it, sat on the living room sofa with his head leant back, eyes shut, humming every so often to make it seem like he is following.
‣ I don’t think he ever shouts. Raising his voice for assertiveness? Yes, but he never shouts at his girls. It reminds him of how his dad use to be with him, and the thought of being even a smidge like his dad really scares him.
JOHNNY ‘SOAP’ MACTAVISH
‣ 2 girls.
‣ He aspires for them both to be bestfriends.
‣ He aspires to be their bestfriends. Like he admires them both.
‣ He will never turn down a tea party invitation. Never.
‣ You’ll be cooking dinner, and have no idea where Johnny is. But you hear distant giggles, and follow them up to your daughters’ room. There, you find your military husband sat at a little plastic table, wearing a tiara, clinking tiny cups together with your daughters and their little bears.
‣ “Well it’s nice to see you again Mr. Snuggles. And who is this new gue- oh, hey lass. Wanna join?”
‣ When they start to grow up, he lets them experiment with make up on him.
‣ And seeing your military husband with sparkly pink eyeshadow on and red rosy cheeks really is a sight for sore eyes.
‣ When on deployment, he will tell any and every story of his little girls to anyone that will listen. He loves to show them off.
‣ This ‘anyone’ is usually Ghost.
KYLE ‘GAZ’ GARRICK
‣ 1 boy.
‣ Definitely has a modern style for his kids. He 100% bought him a pair of adorable tiny airforces.
‣ Is his son’s biggest supporter, in everything.
‣ He is big on praise. The biggest softie ever.
‣ Will put up every single painting his son has made. Your fridge is literally covered in paintings, drawings, pretty much anything made by your little boy, will be put up somewhere in the house.
‣ He vlogs literally everything. More than you.
‣ He watches them all when on deployment, missing you both, usually forgetting about sleep so that he can rewatch his little boy’s first steps for the 100th time.
‣ He also big on getting his boy into his own hobbies. Even though he has no awareness to suitable ages.
‣ You’re on the phone with him one night whilst he is away, as he talks to you about what he wants to get your son into.
‣ “When I’m back I’m gonna take us clay shooting. I reckon he’d like it”
‣ “He’s 2 Kyle”
KÖNIG
‣ 1 girl, you cannot argue.
‣ He worships the ground his babygirl walks on.
‣ He will literally do anything for her. And you, of course. But his little girl is the light of his life.
‣ He loves when he is home because he takes every opportunity to dress his little girl. Every single time he does he is internally screaming at the size of the clothes.
‣ Every. Single. Time. He will come home from deployment with a bouquet of flowers for his wife, and pull out a singular flower before he reaches the door to give to his babygirl.
‣ You are definitely the one wearing the trousers in the household, always having to put your foot down. Because there is no way this man could ever say no to his little girl.
‣ Is always taking photos of the both of you. Always. He isn’t often in photos himself, but will never miss an opportunity to take one of either of you.
‣ When he is home and takes care of your daughter whilst you go to work, he will be sending you videos and photos 24/7 as little updates.
‣ I can imagine him being the driest texter on the planet. Like he is a proper dad, will just send a ‘👍’ or one word answers. So these photos and videos will rarely ever have context. He will just send them randomly.
‣ Is completely unaware of suitable bedtimes for kids. You will spend a night out with your friends, and come back in at like 10pm to find him up with your toddler making pancakes.
‣ “König! She should have been in bed at 7pm!”
‣ “Oh”
#task force 141 x reader#task force 141 platonic#könig#simon ghost riley#captain john price#kyle gaz garrick#john soap mactavish#call of duty#dad!reader#husband!reader#könig fluff#fluff#domestic fluff#simon ghost riley x reader#simon riley
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ᡣ𐭩 Title: Mutual Understanding
ᡣ𐭩 Paring: Rich! Playboy! Taehyung x Fortune teller daughter! Reader
ᡣ𐭩 Summary: She wants nothing to do with love and he hates relationships. Perfect.
ᡣ𐭩 Rating: Explicit (18+)
ᡣ𐭩 Genre: Romance, angst, smut, slow burn, fake relationship au, and cat and mouse vibes
ᡣ𐭩 Part of the The Legendary Seven
ᡣ𐭩 Playlist - Cat & Mouse by Black Swan and Selfish by YooA
ᡣ𐭩 Authors note: I’m proud of this story and honestly my best writing so far me thinks 🥺
May 22 - I edited and added a scene that I felt like it was needed!
“One of the legendary sevens is off the market. Jeon Jungkook, the heartthrob, is going out with one of the students who was accepted through the Kim Scholarship. I heard she’s a fangirl for a gamer streamer so it will be interesting to see how their relationship goes. It’s of course noted that Jungkook’s father tried buying her house. I guess that's another way to keep your house. Until then, Pen.”
“Your mom was right.”
Y/N rolled her eyes and rolled over in Seungkwan’s bed, “Don’t say that.”
“Y/N, she literally got every detail right. I have to give her credit.” Seungkwan tried to show his phone but she kept avoiding it, “Come on, Y/N. Can’t you just listen to your mom?”
“Seungkwan, can you just show me that new game and forget about this?”
“Remember what your mom said? You will find love in the next two months.”
Y/N let out a scoff and sat up in his bed, “That’s like me saying Kim Taehyung will be faithful. It will never happen.”
Seungkwan pouted at his best friend and shook his head, “Let me dream for you.”
“Keep dreaming.”
L/N Y/N, is one of the top students in her major (Radiologic Technology) and her best friend Boo Seungkwan is the top student of his major (Marketing) and was on the gossip site for their school. Seoul University is filled with rich people that lacked basic human kindness which is why everyone loved this website. The person behind it has never said their name but whoever it is, knows more than everyone.
After Seungkwan’s badminton competition, Y/N went over to his house like she always did. Being friends since high school, they basically knew everything about each other. Like how Y/N’s dad left after a night out with his coworkers, she was only six. The one thing that Seungkwan was always curious about was her mother’s “power”. Her mother was a famous fortune teller who gets paid well by CEO’s and she's been doing this for years. Y/N didn’t believe anything her mother said but Seungkwan on the other hand believed every word.
Y/N stood up from his bed and headed to the bathroom to brush her hair. Seungkwan followed her as he scrolled down his phone, “This says that Namjoon has a secret admirer.”
She raised her eyebrow through the mirror and let out a small chuckle. “Are you surprised? Everyone has a crush on that group.”
“Not you.”
“I have a brain, that's why.”
Seungkwan’s phone chimed and he smiled at the screen, “Vernon’s here.”
“Is Seokmin here too?”
“No? Why do you want him here?”
She put her brush down and looked at him with a raised eyebrow, “Yes, it sucks feeling like a third wheel.”
Seungkwan’s face turned red and pointed at her, “YO-YOU SHUT UP!”
Y/N let out a laugh and shrugged her shoulders, “It’s true. Let’s go downstairs to your boyfriend.”
“YAH! YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE A BOYFRIEND!”
“NO, I’M NOT!”
“YOUR MOM SAID-”
“DON’T BRING HER-”
“BOTH OF YOU SHUT UP!”
Seungkwan and Y/N glanced at the door with a nervous look. Seungkwan’s sister isn’t someone to mess with, “So-Sorry.”
Vernon came in and they were hanging out in Seungkwan’s room. They weren’t really talking but their company made it better. It wasn’t until Seungkwan shot up from his spot making Y/N jump, “What the hell?”
“Taehyung dumped Jennie.”
Y/N scoffed at this and rolled her eyes, “They weren’t together. Just fucking.”
“So, it doesn’t matter. They're done now because Jennie just posted a picture with her ex.”
Vernon sighed and glanced at Seungkwan’s phone, “We shouldn’t care about other people's lives.”
“Especially Taehyung’s, he’s just a piece of shit that breaks poor girls' hearts.”
Kim Taehyung let out a puff of smoke as he glanced at Jungkook who was texting on his phone. He glared at this and gently nudged him to get his attention, “Dude, you said you wanted to hang out but you're talking to your girl.”
Jungkook glanced up at Taehyung and rubbed the back of his neck, “Sorry.” He put his phone back in his pocket and gave his friend a concerned look, “I wanted to hang out because I saw Jennie’s post.”
Taehyung hit his cigarette ash in his diamond ashtray and shrugged his shoulders, “What about it?”
“I know you guys were seeing each other-”
“Her pussy was good.”
Jungkook rolled his eyes and shook his head, “You literally saw her for four months straight and wouldn’t call your other girls. That means you liked her.”
“Why would I like her? I’m Kim Taehyung, I don’t fall in love with basic girls.”
“Sometimes I wish a girl would slap you for your attitude.”
Taehyung shrugged his shoulders and leaned back against his leather couch, “Would love to see it happen.”
Jungkook’s phone buzzed in his pocket and he took his phone out, “I have to go.”
“Go to your girlfriend you simp.”
“At least someone likes me for me and not just for my money.”
Taehyung scoffed at this and continued to smoke with annoyance, “How can you stick to one pussy?”
Jungkook let out a laugh and stood up from the couch, “When you find the right person, nothing else matters.”
“Whatever dude.”
Jungkook went to leave and bowed to Taehyung's mother who was coming into the living room, “Ah, Kook, you're going home already?”
Jungkook bowed and gave her a sheepish smile, “My girlfriend needs me.”
Taehyung’s mother sighed and placed a hand on her cheek as she glanced at her son with a frown, “I wish my son had a girlfriend. I need to tell him the good news.”
“The good news?”
Taehyung’s mother nodded her head happily, “I went to see a fortune teller today, she told me that Taehyung will fall in love in two months.”
Jungkook glanced at Taehyung and then back at his mother, “Taehyung? Your son will fall in love with someone?”
“Isn’t that exciting!? My son falling in love, what more can I want?”
“Taehyung...falling in love. I have to go, it was nice seeing you, Mrs. Kim.”
“Bye Kook, be safe.”
Taehyung’s mom smiled at her son and walked towards him with her heels clicking away. Taehyung quickly put his cigarette out and sat up straighter, “Mom?”
“My Tae, I have good news.”
Taehyung raised his eyebrow at his mother, “This can’t be good, what’s the news.”
“A fortune teller told me that you would fall in love with someone in two months. Isn’t that good news?”
“You believe in that? Mom really?”
His mom nodded her head and glanced through the living room windows, “With a son like you, I have to believe in that.”
“What is that supposed to mean!?”
“You know what it means.”
“Mom, just let me live my life the way I want.”
His mom sighed and stood up with a little smirk on her lips, “Well hurry up because in six weeks grandma is coming over and I told her you had a girlfriend.”
“You did what? Mom, you know I don’t have a girlfriend.”
She shrugged her shoulders and nodded her head, “Figure it out. Also, no more smoking, or I will have your father do something about it.”
He swallowed his spit nervously, “Please don’t.”
“Good, let’s go have dinner.”
He watched her leave and fell back into the couch and stared at the ceiling, “What the fuck am I going to do?”
Kim Taehyung, is the second richest student at Seoul University. Everyone knows who he is. He had loving parents and siblings who were perfect. Being part of the legendary seven, it was a blessing and a curse. Everyone knows your business, even those who you don’t want to know. Taehyung hates relationships because what’s the point of being in one when you're in college? You're supposed to have fun and go to school. Why put love on top of the stress of school? Love is just complicated and a headache for him. It will always be like that. Always.
.*･｡ﾟ☆ﾟ.*･｡
Seungkwan and Y/N walked down the hallway talking to one another about random things. It wasn’t until she heard someone running towards her. She turned around to see her other friend running towards her with a wide smile, Hwang Eunbi, “Y/N! I have something to tell you!”
She smiled at the girl and grabbed her hand with ease, “What is it?”
“I got a note from Kevin and he told me that Yunho has a crush on you!”
Y/N rolled her eyes and dropped her hand, “Not this again. Stop trying to set me up with people.”
Eunbi frowned and glanced at Seungkwan, “Did you tell her?”
“Tell me what?”
Seungkwan let out a nervous laugh and turned towards Y/N, “You see...My aunt is having a party next week and I kinda told her...I told her that you had a boyfriend because she kept asking about you and I lied because she wouldn’t leave me alone. I’m sorry and I know you hate relationships but I panicked and she was talking bad about you-”
“Seungkwan, relax.”
Seungkwan raised his eyebrow and glanced at Eunbi, “You're not mad?”
“I know your aunt so I know how you act around her.”
“I’m sorry...I just hate how she talks about you. It’s not fair.”
Y/N shrugged her shoulders and put her hands in her pockets, “Like I give a shit what she says. She’s already on her fourth husband so maybe she should take her own love advice.”
Eunbi laughed at this and wrapped her arm around her neck, “But you should ask Yunho to be your fake boyfriend to show his aunt up.”
“Why would I care? Also, I wouldn’t do that to Yunho because if he has feelings for me then asking him to be my fake boyfriend would be morally wrong.”
Seungkwan smirked at her, “To wipe off that look she always has. You can ask someone else then.”
“That’s tempting but I don’t really care what she thinks about me. Let’s go to lunch before we have to run to class.”
Seungkwan and Eunbi watched her leave with frowns on their faces. Eunbi turned towards Seungkwan, “What are we going to do?”
“I don’t want my aunt to harass her at the party.”
Eunbi's eyes became brighter with an idea that was going to change everything and grabbed Seungkwan’s arm, “I have an idea.”
“Is Y/N going to kill us?”
“Maybe but your aunt will be defeated.”
“Let’s do it.”
Y/N walked into the lunch court with her hands in her pocket. There was a group of girls that had a crush on her because of how cool she was. Y/N’s personality was very laid back and unlike her best friends, she didn’t care about anyone’s opinions. When she got made fun of her mom, she told people to fuck off. She didn’t see a point in fighting with people who only listen to rumors.
She got her usual sandwich and looked at the usual table they always sat at. She dropped her backpack and Seungkwan jumped at the sound, “Why do you always do that?”
“Because it scares you.”
“Y/NNNN!”
“Seokmin, you can use your normal voice.”
She felt an arm around her shoulders and that laugh she came to know, “Where’s the fun in that?” Seokmin removed his arm and sat next to Y/N, “What’s new?”
Eunbi leaned forward with a little smirk, “Do you want the tea about everything you missed?”
“You know me so well.”
Seungkwan pulled out his phone as Y/N ate her sandwich ignoring the whole gossip talk. Seungkwan handed his phone to him with excitement, “Apparently, Taehyung is looking for a girlfriend.”
“Kim Taehyung?”
Eunbi took a sip of her banana milk and nodded her head, “I know right!? Out of everyone, he is the last person I would think would want a relationship.”
“Especially since he was in love with Jennie.”
Seokmin nodded his head and glanced at Y/N, “What do you think, Y/N.”
She placed her sandwich down and shrugged her shoulders, “Why should I care?”
Seungkwan frowned and took the phone from Seokmin, “You're no fun.”
“It’s not my life and I don’t really care for him so what’s the point?”
Eunbi laughed at this and slammed her drink dramatically, “Talking shit about someone is the fundamental of being a college student. It is our duty to fulfill it.”
“I thought our duty was getting good grades.”
“That’s second.”
Y/N raised her eyebrow and nodded her head, “Sure, Seokmin are you free next week?”
“I have a track meeting and then I have a meeting with a CEO my dad set up.”
Y/N frowned at this and nodded her head, “Boring. I’m going to be at this party all by myself.”
Seungkwan pouted at this and looked at Y/N, “I’m going to be there too.”
“Trying to show off to your aunt which means I’m going to be left alone.”
“I don’t show off...”
“You do.”
“You didn’t have to answer all at the same time.”
Taehyung sat down with annoyance and Jimin raised his eyebrow at this, “What’s wrong?”
“My mom.”
Hoseok raised his eyebrow at this and chuckled, “Your mom is an angel.”
“She can be but she can be a devil.”
Namjoon rolled his eyes and took a bite of his food, “What did she do?”
“A fortune-teller told her that I would fall in love in two months, so she told my grandma I have a girlfriend.”
Seokjin let out a laugh and covered his mouth, “That’s unfortunate for you.”
“Shut up, at least I have a choice in my wife.”
“Someone is on their period.”
Taehyung sighed and started playing with his rice, “I’m sorry. I just don’t want to see my grandma sad when she sees me with no girlfriend.”
“You can always have a fake girlfriend.”
Taehyung glanced at Yoongi and thought about it, “I didn’t think of that...”
Jungkook let out a laugh and leaned to his side kissing Bora on her cheek, “Watching you struggle is funny.”
Bora hit his thigh and shook her head at her boyfriend. She glanced at Taehyung with a small smile, “There’s dating apps. You can always use that and put in a bio you need a fake girlfriend.”
“I guess I can do that.”
Jimin nodded his head and clapped his hands, “See it’s that easy. Bora, did you see you were an article by Pen.”
Bora frowned at this and nodded her head, “I saw this and I made the decision to ignore it. It’s upsetting to know that people know the insides of my relationship and to make me look like a charity case but I know the truth.”
Jungkook nodded his head and placed his hand on her thigh, “It’s just meaningless gossip.”
“But gossip is so fun.”
Y/N walked down the hall with Eunbi getting ready for their next class. As they walked down the hall, Taehyung and Jimin were going the opposite way. Taehyung walked past Y/N and he glanced down at her. He raised his eyebrow when she didn’t even give him a second glance. He stood still while Jimin stood there in confusion, “What?”
He stared at Y/N not knowing anything about her, “Nothing...nothing.”
.*･｡ﾟ☆ﾟ.*･
Eunbi and Seungkwan sat in Y/N’s bedroom as they set up a dating profile for their friend. Y/N went to go pick up food and they thought this was the perfect time to make it. Eunbi snatched the phone out of Seungkwan’s hand and shook her head, “God, that’s not a good picture of her. Use the one when we went to your friend's party. She had that purple dress.”
“This isn’t real Eunbi. We’re just doing this so she can have a fake boyfriend.”
“You can at least treat it like it’s real. There’s better pictures of her and you should use them. She needs someone hot.”
Seungkwan raised his eyebrow at this and shook his head, “Is this for her or for you?”
“Both.”
Y/N entered her house, throwing the keys in the bowl. Y/N didn’t live with her mother and she thanked god for that. She couldn’t hear her mother going on and on about her future. It was annoying. She took her shoes off and went towards her cat, Socks. She walked towards her bedroom and opened the door, “I got the sandwiches.” She jumped when she heard a loud bang and raised her eyebrow when she saw Eunbi’s phone on the floor, “What the hell?”
“We were looking at Pen’s new post and you scared us.”
She nodded her head and shrugged her shoulders, “That’s what you get for being involved in other people’s lives.”
Seungkwan glanced at Eunbi and let out a nervous laugh, “Yeah...”
Eunbi grabbed her phone and smiled when saw the profile get uploaded, “Everything always turns out good.”
Taehyung was in his bedroom on his phone. He was scrolling through Instagram and he stopped on Seungkwan’s post. He’s met him once or twice but he was pretty cool. He zoomed in on the picture and saw the girl he saw in the hallway. He thought her name was Y/N but he wasn’t sure. There were no tags on the picture. He clicked on Seungkwan’s icon and saw multiple posts with her and he finally found one that had tags with her username. He clicked on her profile and was looking through her pictures.
“What are you looking at?”
He jumped and looked to see Jimin with his arms crossed, “Nothing.”
“Really? I saw that smile you have when you see someone hot. Show me.”
“Get lost shorty.”
The next day, Y/N was by herself in the library studying for an upcoming test. It wasn’t until she heard one of the chair moves. She looked up from her book and raised her eyebrow when saw Jimin sitting there with a smile on his face. She took off her headphones and tilted her head, “Can I help you?”
“Are you Y/N?”
“Why?”
Jimin shrugged his shoulders and leaned forward making her pull back, “He usually doesn’t like...I’m Jimin.”
She nodded her head and put her headphones back in, “That’s cool. Are you studying or just bothering me?”
He let out a small chuckle and nodded his head, “Can you do something for me?”
“Oh god...what?”
“It’s for a friend.”
Taehyung entered the library with a confused look. Jimin doesn’t go to the library, why does he want to meet in the library? It was weird. He continued his way through the silence but froze when he saw who Jimin was talking to, “That little fucker...” Taehyung made his way towards Jimin with haste. He knew Jimin wouldn’t leave this alone after last night, he never listened to him.
“You like Y/N? Seungkwan’s friend?
Taehyung rolled his eyes and stood up from his bed with annoyance. He tried snatching his phone back but somehow Jimin was faster than him, “I don’t like her. I just saw her in the hallway and thought she was cute.”
“Interesting.”
“You want me to be Taehyung’s fake girlfriend?”
Taehyung stopped in his tracks and his mouth dropped, “Jimin, what the hell are you doing?”
Jimin looked over his shoulders and gave his friend a smirk, “Helping out your situation.”
Taehyung glanced at Y/N who was looking at them with an annoyed look, “I’m not saying yes but I want to hear the reasoning.”
She was looking straight at Taehyung and he felt nervous under her stare, “I saw you on Instagram...I just thought you were cute and Jimin took that into his own hands.”
She nodded her head and picked up her stuff, “I kinda figured. The answer is no and leave me alone.”
Taehyung watched her leave and his mouth was wide, “Did she just reject me?”
“Technically she rejected me.”
“Jimin, shut up. She just rejected me, what the hell?”
Jimin let out a laugh and leaned back in his chair, “Not everyone has to like you.”
Y/N walked down the stairs but was stopped when she felt a tap on her shoulders. She turned around to see a panting Taehyung and she raised her eyebrow at this, “Dude, what?”
“Please be my fake girlfriend.”
“Huh? I just said-”
“I know you said no but I-I just need someone. Please.”
She leaned against the railing and a small smirk appeared, “What do I get?”
“What do you want?”
“You don’t have an offer?”
Taehyung let out an irritated sigh and looked down at his shoes for a second. Y/N couldn’t help but laugh at the sight. He looked back up and shrugged his shoulders, “Just tell me what you want?”
“I need you to be my fake boyfriend for this party and I would also like tickets to Japan for a vacation. I deserve it after being with you.”
“You want a vacation? Do you think being my fake girlfriend would be that-”
“Yes, because it's you.”
Taehyung tilted his head and crossed his arms over his chest, “What do you mean by that?”
“You sleep with everyone and break girls' hearts. Do I need to draw a picture for you?”
“You're very blunt.”
“It’s obvious you only have yes men. If you don’t want to give me that ticket to Japan and a nice hotel, bye I have to go study and stop following myself.”
Taehyung rolled his eyes and nodded his head, “Fine, I’ll give you a trip. How many tickets?”
“Three.”
“Fine but starting now you're my girlfriend.”
She cringed at the word and scoffed at this, “Don’t ever call me your girlfriend. Fake or not, I don’t want to associate that with me.”
“Being someone’s girlfriend? Relationships are fun.”
“How do you know that? Anyways, bye.”
She started walking away and Taehyung grabbed her wrist, “Do we have a deal?”
“We have a deal. Now let me go.”
He let her go and put his hands in his pockets nervously, “Sorry. Can we meet up Friday at Supernova’s?”
“Sure.”
He watched her leave and knew he wanted to prove something to her. He was going to prove that he could be a great boyfriend and prove her wrong about relationships. He wanted to change her view of him and he wasn’t sure why it bothered him so much that she saw him like that. It made him feel uneasy. He barely knew her. Why should he care?
Y/N took a sip of her water and stared at Taehyung who was nervously playing with his fries. It’s been quiet for five minutes and she wasn’t going to be the first person to say anything but this was getting ridiculous. She took out her phone and went to send a text to Seungkwan but stopped when Taehyung let out a small cough, “So...girlfriend.”
“My name is Y/N, use it.”
He nodded his head, “Sorry, Y/N. We have to act like a couple in front of people so stop looking at me like I’m the devil.”
“It’s really hard to ignore the horns.”
He let out a chuckle and shook his head, “Can we be friends at least? It would make it easier.”
Last week, Y/N found herself in Seungkwan’s bedroom listening to him talking about the person in front of her. She heard everything from her best friend’s mouth. Rumors are rumors and she knew this. This was her philosophy and it would be hypocritical of her to listen to the rumors. She had no idea how to deal with the playboy but she was willing to take a chance, “Friends...Sure.”
She watched a boxy smile appear on his face and she noted how bright his eyes looked. There was a touch of mystery behind those brown irises. It was interesting to see how bright they can be. She took a sip of her water and took her phone out, “I have to go, Eunbi needs my help.”
He watched her lick her lips and his eyes couldn’t leave them. The feeling that was erupting was something he never felt. It was annoying. He shook his head and nodded his head, “Since we're friends, can I have your number?”
“I suppose since we're friends. Don’t give it out to anyone.”
Don’t worry about that. I wouldn’t want anyone else having it, “I won’t. Trust me.”
She showed her phone to him and he glanced at the numbers. His eyes slowly went towards her face and he noted how the sun highlighted her face. It showcased her eye color perfectly while showing off her lips. He let out a small cough and sent her a quick message. She smiled at this and put her phone away, “Since we're friends, you should come to Seungkwan’s game tomorrow.”
“To-Tomorrow?”
She nodded her head and slid out of the booth, “Since we have to fake being together, it would make sense for you to be with me there. He is my best friend. Remember?”
“Yes, best friend. Do you want me to pick you up?”
She stood by the table and nodded her head, “Nothing too fancy. We don’t want girls flocking to you. I’ll see you tomorrow, Taehyung.”
“I’ll see you tomorrow, Y/N.”
He watched her leave the cafe and he continued to do so through the glass. He watched the plaid shirt around her waist sway with each step she took. He never noticed how good her legs looked in jeans. There was also something about the way she walked, it was filled with confidence. He cracked his neck and look down at his fries, What the fuck?
“Eunbi, what’s wrong?”
Y/N opened her bedroom to see Eunbi sitting there with a smile, “I have good news.”
“I also have news but you go first.”
Eunbi sat up with her phone in her hands. She turned the phone to show her a picture of Taehyung causing Y/N to raise her eyebrow, “What?”
“He swiped for you. He’s interested in you.”
Y/N let out a laugh and took the phone out of her hand, “You signed me up for a dating app?”
“It worked! What's your good news?”
“Taehyung is my fake boyfriend.”
Eunbi stared at her with pure shock and her mouth dropped, “Kim Taehyung? The famous-”
“Yes, he needed a fake girlfriend so it worked out.”
“Your mom was-”
“Don’t finish that sentence.”
Y/N waited outside her building and she was scrolling on her phone. Taehyung said he would be coming in ten minutes and knowing he was rich (his car would be fast). She hated making people wait. She heard the gates open and she looked up to be pleasantly surprised to see a dark blue Nissan pulling up to her. The window came down to show off Taehyung wearing sunglasses and his boxy smile, “What?”
“I wasn’t expecting a Nissan...I was expecting that BMW that everyone talks about.”
He shrugged his shoulders, “Well not everyone knows I have a Nissan.”
“Does that make me special?”
“You are special.”
They made eye contact and Y/N felt her chest feel lighter at the comment. Compliments come and go but this one stayed with her. It stayed with her longer than it should. She let out a small laugh and nodded her head, “All ready to see Seungkwan play?”
“Yes, I am. Let me get to the door.”
She rolled her eyes as she watched Taehyung quickly unbuckle himself and rush to open her side. She let out a small laugh and bowed to him, “Thank you for being a gentleman.”
“Anything for my lady.”
The drive was pleasant. There wasn’t a lot of talking but it didn’t bother her too much. The jazz music played in the background as she watched nature out her window. Every now and then, Taehyung would glance at her through his mirror and would smile to himself. A smile that he didn’t even realize was on his face.
“Seungkwan!”
Seungkwan turned around with a smile but it quickly changed into a confused one when he saw Taehyung standing next to her, “H-Hey, thanks for coming?”
Y/N glanced at Taehyung and chuckled at Seungkwan’s nervousness, “This is my plus one that I told you about.”
Seungkwan stared at him with shock and stuck his out to shake, “I’m Seungkwan-”
“I know who you are. No need to introduce yourself as a star badminton player.”
Y/N watched Seungkwan’s face blush and she smiled with pride, “Seungkwan is a star on the court. He needs to be reminded by others and not just his friends.”
“Y/N...”
She heard his coach and she smiled at him, “Good luck.”
Taehyung smiled at him and patted his back gently, “Good luck.”
“Thanks, I'll see you later.”
Y/N watched him run off and she turned toward Taehyung with a smile, “Thank you.”
“For?”
“Boosting up his confidence. He doesn’t believe me when I say it.”
Taehyung shrugged his shoulders at this, “He’s your best friend. I’ll show him my support.”
“Well, it meant a lot to me. Thank you.”
They walked towards the stands and Taehyung glanced down to see their fingers touching. He wanted to intertwine their fingers together but he had to stop himself. He notices all the moles along her arm and the little cuts that tell a story. A story that he wanted to know. There was something about Y/N that he wanted to know so desperately. It was like a man that needed water. He glanced up to her face and the moles decorated her face like a castle with flowers. It was a sight to be seen. She was something he has never seen before and he wanted to capture all the different expressions she has. This was a feeling he has never had before and it was making him feel sick.
Y/N sat down with Taehyung following. She glanced at him and pulled out a bag of Skittles, “Want some?”
He glanced down at the candy and then back at her with a mischievous look, “You can get in trouble with that?”
She tilted her head at him with a smirk, “Are you going to tell on me?”
“Maybe I should so you can be taught a lesson.”
She rolled her eyes and popped a red skittle in her mouth, “No fun.”
“Don’t worry I also brought some snacks. Do you like sea salt chips?”
“I should tell you. You do know the best chips are the ones in the green bag?”
Taehyung let out a laugh and shook his head, “Of course you like spicy chips. It matches your personality.”
“Are you saying I'm spicy?
“It comes in waves, a person with boldness with different levels that captures the whole room. With that fiery attitude and that fire in their eyes. A spicy personality to make it known who you are. It’s admirable.”
She let out a laugh and shook her head, “You're so weird...a good weird though.”
“Does that mean your opinion of me has changed?”
“Don’t get ahead of yourself.”
.*･｡ﾟ☆ﾟ.*･
It’s been a week and every day, Y/N and Taehyung would spend time together to get to know each other. Every night, Taehyung would drive her to the river and they would just talk as the stars listened. Every morning, Y/N would make him breakfast and they would sit in the park near school listening to jazz. There were quiet moments but it didn’t feel uncomfortable if Taehyung accepted it. He didn’t get a lot of those in his normal life. Y/N relished in their quiet moments because it taught her more about Taehyung than his words could ever do.
Today was Seungkwan's Aunt's party and it was their first event to act like a couple. She was nervous that everyone was going to know she was lying. A piece of her wanted to run away and she never wants to run away. She always faced challenges head first but this was different. Seungkwan’s aunt loved to bring up the fact that her father left her. It was known throughout the families that Y/N was basically parentless and they would throw it at her whenever they could. Her mother made her rich but she also barely took care of the girl, she had to be her own parent. When people use the past to insult you in the future, it hurts more when it isn’t your fault.
She stared at herself with doubt. She was dressed in a light blue ballerina dress that had floral beadwork all around. When she turned the skirt would shine under the light and it made her feel seen. She put her hair up in a high bun with pearl earrings when she heard a knock at the door. She glanced at it and felt comfort knowing who it was. She carefully made her way with her heels clicking away on her floor and she opened it with a smile, “You're early.”
Taehyung shrugged his shoulders and passed her flowers, “I was too excited to get you these.”
She glanced down at the red tulips and smiled to herself, “Red tulips? Is there a reason?”
Taehyung shrugged and leaned against the doorframe, “It’s a secret.”
“We’re keeping secrets now? Come in.” He walked in and his eyes drifted to the delicate fabric on her body. The dress showed off her collarbones and the way she looked so elegant. It was something he wasn’t used to from her. She set the tulips down on her coffee table and glanced at Taehyung, “What?”
“Come here, please.” She gave him a raised eyebrow but did what he asked. He gently grabbed the hand and smiled at her, “Twirl for me.”
She did a twirl and when came back to face him, she asked, “Do you like it?”
“Like it, I love it.”
“You flatter me.”
“You deserve it.”
She smiled at this and glanced down at their fingers and let out a small cough. She gently removed her fingers and went to her kitchen ignoring her heart, “Do you want some water?”
“That would be great.”
The building was always grand. Seungkwan’s aunt always did this for him (even though he hated it). She claimed she wanted to show off her nephew's talents but in reality, it was to network. It was almost always to network for her company and she was just using Seungkwan as a cover-up. Seungkwan’s parents never noticed because they were too kind. Far too kind to be related to that witch.
They entered the building and everyone was dressed in their nice clothing. Businessmen with their ties a little too tight and wives that had blood-red lipstick smirking at you to feel small. It was like this every year. There was something about the room that made the confidence that Y/N usually had been completely wiped away.
“Are you okay, Y/N?”
She turned towards Taehyung and gave him a fake smile, “I’m okay...well I’m going to be. You’re good company.
Taehyung could sense that Y/N wasn’t feeling like herself. He intertwined their fingers together and rubbed her knuckles gently, “I’ll be here for you okay.”
“O-Okay.”
She quickly finds Seungkwan and Eunbi with Taehyung by her side. She gave them hugs and relief was written on her face, “You look beautiful, Y/N.”
“Thank you Seungkwan. You look good too.”
“Well if it isn’t L/N.”
Y/N felt that shiver and she slowly turned around to see Seungkwan’s aunt looking her up and down. Disapproval written all over her face, “Good-”
“I see you brought someone for once.”
Y/N glanced at Taehyung and nodded her head, “I’m sorry for the late-”
“I’m shocked you can get someone as good-looking as him. Especially when you're fatherless. It's shocking.”
Taehyung glared at the older woman and walked to be in front of Y/N with annoyance on his face, “Please don’t talk about my girlfriend like that when I am present. If you're going to insult one of us then insult me for I picked the wrong socks for the occasion.”
Y/N stared at him with wide eyes not knowing what to say but she felt her heartbeat louder. Seungkwan’s aunt tilted her head at him and studied his face, “Kim Taehyung, from the Kim family. It’s an honor to meet you.”
“I wish I could say the same. You insulted my girlfriend and now you’re trying to kiss my feet. Do you have no shame?”
Seungkwan’s aunt glanced down at her shoes and cleared her throat, “Is your father here? I would love to talk to him.”
“He is not but I am. The answer will be no. No matter what question you ask, it will be no. Y/N, let’s have a dance.”
Taehyung grabbed her wrist and they quickly made their way to the middle of the dancefloor. He wrapped his arm around her waist and they started to dance with the delicate strings filling the air. Y/N was in a state of shock at what just happened and Taehyung could sense that, “No one deserves that treatment.”
She looked at his face and shook her head, “It was said that it was my fault my father left...maybe I do deserve it.”
“It was his fault. He is not a man but a child. You deserve the world and I won’t let an old hag destroy that.”
He brought her in closer and she couldn’t help but smile, “You're passionate.”
“When it comes to you, yes.”
She let out a small laugh and looked away from his brown eyes, “Don’t look at me like that.”
“Like what?”
She glanced back and they continued to stare, “I’m not sure but stop it.”
“I can’t help it. I’m just looking at you.”
After two more dances, Taehyung took her out to the garden and they stood next to each other with flowers around. The moon shone in the water fountain as they sat on the white stone. Y/N’s fingertips gently touched the water and smiled, “You know this is the first time I had fun at Seungkwan's aunt’s party.”
“Did I do it justice?”
“You did. I actually danced usually I just stayed in the back avoiding her but tonight I actually danced. It felt nice.”
He smiled and picked up a rose. He placed it in her lap and glanced at the stars, “I’m glad. Would you like to dance with me now?”
She glanced down at the rose and then back at him, “There’s no music. How will we dance?”
“We don’t need music to dance. We have each other to do so.”
She placed the rose on the stone and slowly stood up with Taehyung. He smiled at her and they slowly started dancing under the stars. His hand was on her waist as she avoided his eyes. There was something there but she couldn’t figure it out. The feeling in her chest was becoming too strong and she wanted to run away but it was as if Taehyung knew this, so he held on to her tighter. Their eyes met and he couldn’t help smiling and she returned it. It felt good to smile and it also made her sick.
“Mom, why are you here?”
Y/N was in her living room reading up for her test when there was a knock at the door. She was expecting Seungkwan or Eunbi but there she was with her mom. It’s been two weeks since the party so she expected them to come forward with some tea. Y/N sat on the couch with an annoyed look as her mother sat there with a smudged look, “Everything's coming together.”
“What is?”
“You're falling in love, can’t you see it.”
Y/N frowned at this and stood up, “I think it's time for you to go.”
“Falling in love can be beautiful. Just let it happen.”
“Are you trying to be my mother? Now? Where was this when I was younger?”
Y/N’s mother frowned at this and stood up, “I’m trying to give you advice. Falling in love can change the world.”
“Then why did dad leave? You give love advice to everyone but you can’t even follow it.”
“I told your father to leave because he wanted nothing to do with me.”
Y/N frowned at this and stared at her mother in shock, “What about me? I’m his daughter. Did he not want me?”
“I kept you-”
“You kept him away from me. Didn’t you?” The silence in the room made it clear to Y/N and she nodded her head at this, “I think it’s time for you to go.”
“Just fall in love, Y/N.”
Y/N opened the door and she was met with those brown eyes, “Taehyung? What are you doing here?”
“I came to visit you. I had to tell you something...”
“Are you Kim Taehyung? I told your mother that you were going to fall in love this month. How is it going?”
Y/N’s mother pushed past her and looked at Taehyung with a smile, “Your mother was excited to know her son was going to fall in love.”
Taehyung glanced at her and then back at Y/N, “Y/N, who is this?”
“This is my mother....”
Taehyung looked at her mother and then back at her, “Your mother is a fortune teller...the fortune teller that told my mother I would fall in love, and then I met you a month later...”
Y/N scoffed at this and looked at Taehyung, “Are you saying I set this up?”
Taehyung's eyes widened at this and shook his head, “That’s not what I’m saying. In fact the opposite.”
“What do you mean?”
“Y/N, I’m in love with you.”
Y/N stared at Taehyung with a shocked face and shook her head, “You can’t love a person like me...I have nothing. My mother and father both left me. What do I have to offer?”
“You offer me so much that I can’t even put it into words.”
“Y/N, this is love.”
Y/N shook her head and stared at her mother with anger, “You need to go. I can’t do this.”
“He just told you he love-”
“GO. NOW.”
Y/N watched her mother leave and then she glanced at Taehyung with a frown as tears started to form. Taehyung stood his ground and looked at her, “Y/N...I’m in love with you. You are the stars at night that keep the moon company. You are forever on my mind. When the sun makes its way or even when the moon appears, you always appear. I crave sleep because I know I can always see you. Y/N-”
“Tae...I simply can’t”
Taehyung glanced at his shoes and then back at her, “Is it because you won’t let yourself feel love?”
“I can’t do this right-”
“Y/N, please. Give me a chance.”
She stared at him and a single tear fell, “Don’t do this to me.”
“Y/N, I want you. In the short amount of time that I have been with you, I have learned so much. Please Y/N. We can be scared together.”
Y/N bit her lip and more tears came down, “Please...”
Taehyung nodded his head and took a step back, “I’ll be waiting for you...”
She watched him leave and quickly closed the door. She leaned against the wood and fell to the floor with tears coming down. Her mind is telling her to focus on her school but her heart wants Taehyung. It only wants him...but she is so scared to be in love. She can’t be left alone again.
.*･｡ﾟ☆ﾟ.*･
Sometimes silence can be the greatest enemy. Y/N sat on her bed as she stared outside her window. The day was beautiful, not a cloud to be seen but her heart felt clouded. The look on Taehyung’s face was sketched into her heart and it made her feel sick. Was she making the right decision?
There was a knock at the door and she slowly got up from her bed. Not even caring to look through the peephole to see who it was, she opened the door. She let out a deep sigh and leaned against the door frame, “Mother now is not the time.”
“This is the time. You need me.”
Y/N glanced at her shoes and shook her head, “You won’t listen to me. Come in.”
They both sat on her couch while Y/N stared at the wall with an emotionless stare. While her mother looked at her with concern, “Y/N, the truth about your father...”
“Mom, I don’t think I want to hear it.”
“Please.”
Y/N looked up to see her mom’s face twist into a serious face and she nodded her head, “Okay...”
“Your father never loved me. He made that very clear. He just picked me because he knew I was the easiest to marry. When I became pregnant with you it was the happiest day of my life but he was the opposite. He wanted a son and I was afraid that he would...he would hurt you. He visited and acted like your dad until you were six, I had enough. It wasn’t fair for you. I told him to leave and never come back...and that’s what he did.”
Y/N stared at her mother with wide eyes and guilt creeping up her throat, “Why did you let me hate you for so long?”
“I felt like I deserved it. I made you think your father loved when in reality he never loved you....I’m so sorry.”
“No mom, I’m sorry.”
Her mom stood up and sat next to her grabbing her hands. She put her hands into her lap and smiled, “When I saw that my daughter was going to fall in love, I felt so happy.”
“I don’t think it's going to work out..”
“Nonsense, do you see how he looked at you?”
Y/N glanced up at her mother and shook her head, “No...I didn’t.”
“He looked at you as if you were his summer sky after a long winter. He loves you.”
“I can’t be capable of that.”
“Why?”
“I’m so stubborn...I put my foot down so fast that I can’t even think. I’m...I’m scared to love him. Not because he’s a bad man, the opposite really. He’s a great man. It’s rare to find that...I’m broken and I’ve been left alone for so long. Why would anyone love something broken? I couldn’t even get my own father to love me? How could I hold something so delicate?”
Y/N’s mom frowned at this and pushed hair behind her hair from her forehead, “That’s what love is. You take that chance and the person you chose to love makes a beautiful painting. Even through the hard times, the painting gets more colors. You deserve to be loved and cherished. Don’t let fear hold you back. Be in love, Y/N.”
Y/N looked away with a tear escaping and she let out a sour laugh, “Do you think he would want me still?”
“I know he does?”
“Why because you're a fortune teller?”
“No, because I’m your mother. For once in your life, do something for yourself.”
After the conversation with her mother, Y/N ran to Eunbi’s house not caring what shoes she had on. She knocked on the door to see Eunbi and Seungkwan looking at her with curious eyes, “Are you okay, you haven’t called us?”
Y/N nodded her head, “I need help to get ready for a party...I need to tell Taehyung something important.”
Seungkwan raised his eyebrow, “What is it?”
“That I love him...I’m still scared but I want to be scared with him. I want him...I want him so bad that I-I can’t even explain it. I need help.”
Seungkwan smiled at this and nodded his head, “I’m so happy you finally figured it out...Let’s get you ready.”
Eunbi opened the door wider and clapped her hands, “You need to wear lavender.”
“Why?”
“Taehyung loves lavender...duh.”
Taehyung stood next to Jimin as he stared down at his shoes with an emotionless face. Jimin sighed and nudged his shoulder, “Think of the positive...you get to see your grandma.”
“I have missed her. I wish she could’ve met Y/N.”
Jimin rubbed his shoulders gently and gave him a soft smile, “Breakups are hard. I should know.”
“This wasn’t even a breakup. It was me finally meeting the right person but it never goes my way.”
The door opened and Taehyung’s mother came in with a smile, “The party is starting. Your grandma is excited to see you.”
Taehyung nodded his head, “I’m excited to see her as well.”
His mother frowned and walked towards him to fix his tie. She fixed his hair and smiled, “Just remember the night has just begun.”
“Mom, she’s not coming...”
“You don’t know that to be true. So, just wait.”
Taehyung and Jimin made their way downstairs. His grandma was talking to a small group of people and hearing her laugh made him smile. Ever since his grandpa passed away it was rare to hear that laugh. He continued to walk towards her but he stopped in his tracks when he heard a familiar voice. He ignored Jimin’s voice and made his way through the group of people. He stood there frozen when he saw her.
Y/N turned towards him and gave him a gentle wave, “I didn’t want you to wait any longer....”
Taehyung glanced at his grandma who gave him an approved smile, “Grandma, I’m going to take Y/N.”
“Go right ahead.”
Taehyung’s grandma watched with a smile on her face. She turned towards her daughter and smiled, “Is she the one?”
Taehyung’s mom smiled and nodded her head, “I believe so.”
“I hope he is happy.”
Jimin walked towards them with a wine glass in his hand, “I know he is.”
Taehyung grabbed her wrist and made their way to the library where no one would be. He touched his finger to her chin as the light detailed out her face. Her eyes held anticipation and her lips were the perfect shape. He was glad no one noticed them. He smiled and this smile was as wide as the Cheshire cat.
“Taehyung...” She whispered and the softness of her voice made him want to fall to his knees.
He leaned in with their foreheads together, “Yes?”
“I-I love you...”
He smiled at this and brought his lips to hers, the gentleness that he wanted to showcase was taken over with hunger. He kissed her with a passion that he didn’t even know he had. This wasn’t about sex, this was about love. Love in its purest form.
“Taehyung?” Y/N gasped as he was gently pushing her down onto the sofa. He was kissing her jaw and then her neck, “Taehy-”
He smiled to himself when he nipped her earlobe and removed himself from her to stare down at her, “Yes?”
“I just-”
He kissed her again with the desire that was harboring in his chest. His hands went under the hem of her dress and looked back up at her, “Yes, my love?”
“Nothing. Continue.”
He pressed his hips against her and let the moon shine through the windows blush at the sight. He slid his hand over the soft skin of her thigh and then towards her stomach, “Don’t leave me.”
“I would never leave you. I will stand by you from now on.”
Taehyung smiled at this and leaned forward kissing her neck. His large hands cups her face as his thumb traced her jawline. He pressed his lips to hers as he slipped his tongue between their lips. She moaned into the kiss digging her fingers into his suit jacket. His warm lips were new but somehow they felt so familiar, “We can’t take off our clothes...someone can walk in.”
He frowned at this and kissed her forehead, “I’ll make it quick then. I’ll take you back to my apartment and show you properly.”
“Who said I’ll go home with you?”
He rolled his eyes and unbuckled his belt in record time. He unzipped his pants and glanced at her, “I love you.”
“I love you too.”
His fingers toyed around her underwear before pulling it down to her ankles. She bucked her hips forward and he couldn’t help but smirk. He went under her dress skirt and started to place kisses around her clit, sucking it. A breathless moan left her lips as his fingers ran up and down her folds, “Taeee~.”
“I need to make sure you're ready for me, love.”
His fingers became coated in her arousal and she felt her body becoming tingly. He pulled away and she frowned at this. He leaned forward placing a kiss on her collarbone, “Don’t look too upset, you're going to come on my cock.”
He dragged the red tip along her wet folds causing her to whimper at the touch. She was already so sensitive. He switched positions and had her on top making things easier. She gripped onto his shoulders, guiding him into her. “O-Oh, please Tae.” He kissed the side of her head and groaned when she sank down fully.
The two panted heavily, relishing the moment before he started to move his hip. His mind takes over as he feels her clench at every movement. The sound of skin slapping echoed in the room that would make anyone blush. It wasn’t time to be shy.
“Look at you, just for me and only for me.”
He brushed soft kisses across her collarbones, thrusting in and out. His chest is pressed against hers as hands intertwine with each other. He clenched his jaw and leaned down to bring her into a passionate kiss. She pushed him gently and groaned, “Tae, can I come?”
“Yes, you can love.”
He swiftly thrusts into her and this was it for her. She arched her back and he smirked when he felt her cum go onto his pants. He continued to thrust into her and he kissed the side of her head as she wrapped her arms around his neck, “You did so good for me.” He let out a breathy groan and he couldn’t help himself from coming in her. She moaned at the feeling and they kissed as they moaned into each other's mouths.
When they pulled away she smiled at him, “I would like to go to your house.”
“Anything for you.” He leaned down and kissed the moles on her wrist.
.*･｡ﾟ☆ﾟ.*
“Taehyung?”
Taehyung turned around and raised his eyebrow, “Jennie?”
It was the start of a new semester and something Taehyung wasn’t looking forward to. He was in line to pick up his tea when he felt a tap on his shoulders. He was surprised to see Jennie looking at him as if she was begging him, “You never texted me back.”
“What? That was like four months ago, I thought that would be clear.”
Jennie frowned at this and crossed her arms over her chest, “I thought you wanted me. We could always spend time at the pool. I know you liked it there.”
“Listen, Jennie, I-”
“Babe.”
Jennie turned around to see Y/N smiling at Taehyung. Y/N walked past Jennie and hugged Taehyung. She kissed his cheek and turned towards Jennie with a raised eyebrow, “And you are?”
“I’m Jennie, who are you?”
Y/N smirked at this and kissed Taehyung’s neck. When she looked back at Jennie she smirked, “I’m his girlfriend.”
After the party for his grandmother, Taehyung asked Y/N out. It was a beautiful confession, I love you and I’m not used to love but I want to learn with you. I know you're scared of love but I am too. Let’s conquer this fear together. I love you Y/N. How could Y/N say no? Taehyung did keep his promise. He gave the tickets to Japan to her but they went together with his mother. The small vacation was enjoyable. It made Taehyung happy to know his mother loves his girlfriend.
Everyone at school was shocked about him being in a relationship. He understood why. Y/N’s friends were equally shocked because Y/N was so against relationships for the longest of times. It was clear to everyone that they were in love with each other and nothing was going to change that.
They went to visit Y/N’s mother and he tried his best to keep the peace.
“I can see a wedding in the future and five kids.”
Y/N rolled their eyes and intertwined her fingers with his, “Mom, no fortune telling. I’m trying to have a good lunch with you for once.”
“I can’t help it if I see it.” Y/N’s mom leaned forward towards Taehyung and smiled, “You like the name Aria?”
Taehyung nodded his head slowly, “Yes?”
“I love that name for my future granddaughter.”
“MOM!”
Seungkwan and Eunbi stopped reading Pen’s articles after they saw Y/N’s name. It wasn’t fun anymore when someone you cared about was being talked down to. Y/N was glad they stopped reading the trash. She still didn’t understand how Pen knew some things but she wasn’t going to think too much about it.
She smiled when she saw Jennie’s face drop when she said this. Jennie looked around her awkwardly and just left the scene. Y/N smiled at this and looked up to Taehyung, “I don’t think she likes me?”
“Who cares? I love you.”
“And I love you.
────°˖✧ ✧˖°────────°˖✧ ✧˖°────
Tag List:
@sumzysworld @whoa-jo
#bts reactions#bts scenarios#bts imagines#bts jungkook#bts namjoon#bts seokjin#bts taehyung#bts jimin#bts yoongi#bts x reader#Bts#taehyung x reader#bts taehyung x reader#bts fanfction#bts fanfic
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we'll meet again on some snowy day
In which they meet again after Phil travels to the other plane
<3•<3•<3•<3•<3
Philza was busy, and Missa knew very well what it was like to be busy, so instead of being upset by his husband's sudden absence, he took advantage of filling the hours of alone time he couldn't have with his children in the past.
The happiest moments of his days being the three of them were those in which he could learn more about his children, the proper method to care for Lullah's hair or Chayanne's interest in streaming. Now that they were off the island, his little ones' imagination was the limit.
He allowed himself to breathe the cold air that played in his lungs, Quesadilla did not reach that cold even in its harshest winters, but the arctic hardly had warmth to give if you moved away from the dominions of the empire.
he noticed in the distance how another black shadow was approaching, crossing the frozen air with impetus and Missa smiled slyly when he was close enough to his earshot shouting the now customary "MUMZA SEND GREETINGS"
As quickly as the little crow got to him Missa made sure to lavish his plumage with soft, loving caresses, slightly interrupting his loud ramblings of “TECHNOBLADE AND PHIL TOOK A TEA” “DADZA CHOKED ON HIS MUG LMAO” “GREAT EMPIRE, POG EMPIRE” “SOUL HARVEST POST TEA O7” “TEA FOR THE ANGEL OF DEATH” “SOULS FOR THE EMPIRE” “BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD” with loud purrs
Soon the tea party gossip between old friends and apparent war crimes was amplified when a cloud blackened his view, surrounding him with hundreds of messenger crows that Phil had sent to keep his family updated on his adventures with the most important people in his life, he laughed with joy as he tried to pay attention to the messages he had been receiving for a while.
It was a dense cloud, so dense that Missa had difficulty seeing beyond his nose and even so he smiled happily knowing that Philza had been able to safely reunite with his people, he was a little afraid that as soon as they escaped from quesadilla the older man would not longer want him and the reaper would never see him again thanks to the difference in power between them, from the angel of death to a simple death reaper made him feel small.
He should have given him more credit, Philza is loyal in a way only a crow would ever be.
Missa is enthralled with the cloud of happy stories wishing that the sapphire-eyed man could stay longer on the plane of the dead experiencing more wonders that he did not notice anything else until a pair of firm, warm arms rested firmly on his waist.
He cried out loud and confused when the crows began to chant a name that tasted like honey in his mouth. Amazing how no matter how much time passed Missa always seemed to fit into Phil's arms like he was made to be in them forever.
The cold blue sky or the frozen ice envies the bluish color in his man's eyes and when he smiles at him, he feels the snow melting around him, every time he returns from the celestial plane he looks happier and revitalized as if shining with pure joy and Missa wants him to stay there and be this happy every day of his life, he deserves it. Stupefied, he still does not notice how among the sea of feathers that still surround them, a pair of revitalized wings press around him like a shield against the elements.
“Misaaaa”
“Philza!”
“Missa…” His warm breath against Missa's collarbones makes him shiver and he places his hands on the opponent's shoulders. Allowing himself to enjoy the shorter man's company.
“I missed you” mentions the skeleton
“I missed you too” he murmurs something muffled against the fabric that protects Missa's body.
“How is the boss?”
“Well, she sends you greetings!” As if he didn't already know from the crows "Techno too, he says hello and asks when are you taking Chayanne to train?"
Sighing softly into the blonde hair Missa allows himself to meditate. “Mmh he flew to the Nether to help Dapper with a special loot or something. "he'll probably be back in a day or two."
Philza laughed softly at the thought of his little dragon, more than worrying about him, he would worry about every damn mod down there.
“When is Techno available, cariño?”
“For his favorite nephew? It better be all the time in the world,” Philza exclaimed with a happy laugh that pierced Missa's chest literally and figuratively.
Suddenly the crows around him cleared up a bit but before Missa could react a soft and indignant voice echoed in their minds.
“Chay is not Uncle Techno's favorite!”
“Llulah!!” Philza left his husband's comfortable chest to greet the dragon that was flying near them.
Although he will deeply miss the touch as soon as it faded, he knew that he would have the arms of his platonic husband again later, he allowed himself to enjoy the scene in front of him without worrying about anything else: Chayanne's absence was felt in the air but the laughter of father and daughter only predicted positivity, for a moment he almost lost the elegant but simple clothes in light blue tones and the royal blue cape that adorned his partner, on his head rested a gold crown symbol of the Empire. His girl, on the other hand, had soft and deep colors, something about her still gave vibes to a pre-Hispanic dragon, a mix between snake scales and colorful feathers, there were also poppies snaking between her long horns that Phil was now complimenting, “Chayanne will be so pissed off when he see that they grew more than his”
“Let's see those teeth!”
Both dragons were omnivores with a special attraction to meat but if Missa had to guess
“Is it me or are Chayanne's even bigger?” Missa asked, stroking Lullah's snout a little, who did not hesitate to blow some thick, black smoke from her nostrils into Missa's face.
Philza burst into laughter as Missa tried to scold the dragoness, ignoring that some ash got in his face making him look very funny actually.
“If you don't behave I'll make your dad cook today!” Llulah remained silent about that, wanting to refute something about how her fangs were sharper than Chay's, how apá Missa deserved it a little, which was with love! And pray not to have the classics…
“In fact I learned a new recipe with avocado toast, do you want to hear that? You have an avocado toast and BOOM you put nother one on top” Lullah made a tired groan and Dadza was such a smug “I call it; an avocado sandwich”
“That's great, man” Missa barely contained the urge to laugh while the dragon twisted her tail in displeasure, “But you won't be too tired now to cook?”
“Definitely not for you, mate”
Laughter resounded once again in the frozen when, just as when she was a small egg, Lullah dropped into an exaggerated pose of defeat.
Yeah. he felt good having waited for this.
#qsmp#qsmp missa#qsmp philza#qsmp tallulah#death family#qsmp pissa#death duo#deathduo#qpp this time#some fluff
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I’m sorry I need to rant for a second. I just saw a post where someone said that they don’t understand Komahina because after Chapter 1 Hajime hated Nagito. Like ????? Hajime never hated him??? He was just confused and didn’t understand because of the extreme change in Nagito during the trial. Even after Chapter 1, Hajime tried to make an effort to understand him. And in the Dr3 Hope arc, they clearly have made up. At this point, people just don’t understand them at all and it’s driving me nuts. Another thing that bothers me is when people just chalk it up to its protag x antag and that’s the only reason for the ship. I think compared to the other protag and antag ships Komahina makes the most sense in my opinion because they have so much more of a story to them, you know? Anyway sorry this is so long, people upset me fr.
Absolutely no need to apologize you cooked, this makes me upset too!!!
I swear the day people actually understand just how reciprocal Komahina is the same day world peace is achieved Lol. It's more accurate to say Komahina is like friends, to Hajime feeling betrayed, to them trying to understand each other, to Nagito then feeling betrayed, to fully friends again, and then lovers, they're pretty complicated LOLL.
Komahina isn't really toxic in an actual toxic way it's more like they're both complicated and want to understand each other. They're reciprocal but doomed by the circumstances lol. When there's misinterpretations about Nagito's character as a whole then the same people will proceed to misunderstand the ship as well unfortunately. :(
#nagito komaeda#danganronpa#sdr2 nagito#danganronpa nagito#danganronpa komaeda#sdr2 komaeda#komaeda nagito#sdr2#danganronpa goodbye despair#nagito#hajime x komaeda#komaeda#komahina#hinakoma#komahina danganronpa#hajime danganronpa#hajime hinata danganronpa#hajime hinata dr2#hajime hinata
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So, I made a post and in it I talked about Pen and Colins love story and how people thought it moved to fast. I'm going to make a post just about this to kind of help and resolve why it truly was not rushed. In season one you can see that Pen has something for colin. She acts truly like a girl with a crush who is trying to hide it. And if you don't know the back story of them and how they first met I'll keep it short but basically in their book it's talked about more. So, pen and Colin met when Pen was 15 about to turn 16 (I think I'm not too sure). Her bonnet flew off into the wind and it hit Colin while he was riding on a horse. And he fell into the mud. In the book it says that's when she fell in love with Colin because he laughed at the fact that he was knocked off and he was kind about it. He didn't yell at her. (Which is who he is truly as a person he is very kind; this new season is him trying to be more like his brothers and then men around him). Now (In the show) I believe she's somewhere in her early 20's. In the book despite before season 3 Colin danced with Pen at least at every ball. Every event he talked to her. When she was at the Bridgerton house she would talk with him. They were close despite it not being shown as much in the show. In the book Colin told his brothers that he would never marry pen, unlike in the show it's his "guy friends" that he says he would not court her. Ofc this like truly breaks her and sees that there is not future with him. Season 2 comes around ofc Colin is clueless of why she is acting cold. When she finally tells him he feels guilty, not for saying it though but for her hearing it. Deep down he did have feelings for her, but since they were very close friends that spark would never be as well-lit as Pen's was, and still is, during season 3. The whole husband thing and helping her out was out of being a good friend. But as we can see this man folds under every time, he is alone with her. The kiss was the thing to break him though. Pen truly thought it meant nothing to him, WHEN IT DID AND WE ALL SAW IT. He couldn't help but for that spark to turn into a whole forest fire. He was so dumb to never see her as more. Now that he does, he tries all that he can to stop her from getting married. He should be jealous, and she should be angry. She knows she doesn't deserve to get her marriage stopped by someone who supposedly does not have feeling for her or would not marry her. Ofc she's going to be pissed. Ofc he's going to be jealous; he's thinking about that damn kiss. It was passionate and love filled. He didn't know that's how it could be with her. it was not rushed; it was a slow burn, but everyone was way too focused on the other love stories to see theirs because all you saw was a cubby girl with a crush and thought nothing more of it.
#bridgerton spoilers#bridgerton#bridgerton season 3#bridgerton s3#bridgerton netflix#colin bridgerton#penelope featherington
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Good Omens Fic Rec: creature of mine
"Dunno why, but s'not working this time. M'not resssponding to it." Crowley's eyes flickered with something entirely unreadable. "I need a warm body."
"I see."
"Can't even use my fingers properly with these bloody claws. Still, feels better to have something warm, something moving."
Aziraphale attempted to make sense of Crowley's words, his head pounding viciously. A warm body.
"Would you like me to... hold you again?"
Crowley smiled, open-mouthed and beastly. His fangs glistened in the darkness.
"Need you to fuck me, angel."
Or: Aziraphale buys Crowley a snake plant, hoping to please Crowley with the appealing smell of its flowers. Its effects on Crowley are far more extreme than Aziraphale anticipated, and it’s down to him to face them head-on.
Length: 21,253 Words
AO3 Rating: Explicit / Spice Level 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
Best for: After Dark, Canon AU
Triggers: None
Read it here, fic by ineffabildaddy, omens_for_ophelia
*Minor Spoilers* Buckle in, it's long post time. I admit to bias in the length of this post because I love this author, but above all, my enjoyment of this story is so genuine and I am so proud to recommend that you all read it too. This was written for the sex pollen event that has been going on recently (so many more for me to read!) and it's one I knew was coming but didn't know too many details about. So when I woke up to the email that it was posted, I knew I was going to have such a good morning, and oooh boy did I.
Caught outside in the rain, Aziraphale steps briefly into an exotic plant shop to stay dry. When he spots a beautiful flowering snake plant, well, he's free from Heaven now and free to buy his friend a gift. And what a gift it will be when they realize that the plant's pollen contains the exact pheromones that trigger Crowley's snake desires. Even though I knew exactly where this was going, the actual journey was so intoxicating. When the effects first take hold, neither of them knows exactly what to do. Both are locked into shame and embarrassment over the situation, but the trust and protection they have for each other is sturdy. Crowley struggles with losing control and the pain of vulnerability, while Aziraphale tries desperately to deny his own wants and desires. He represses it all to protect Crowley. And isn't this just the most beautiful metaphor for their entire relationship? As always, they get there in the end. It's as heartwarming as it is sensual. I will never tire of them completely surrendering to each other.
The thing I always love most about this narrative style is how it blends poetry and smut. It will paint with gorgeous prose and then snap our attention back with its explicit language. It's thrilling to me and a shining example of how rich smut stories can be. I'm awed and horny! And I have to say, this was such a clever and interesting take on Crowley's snake body! Naga/Monster fuckers, this one needs to be made a priority for you. It was described in excellent detail but also depicted gorgeously by the included art! I've still got goosebumps over the third piece of included art! The color palette! The bodies!! The emotion! I'm in love. Both author and artist have a talent for making me feel so at home in my own body with their works. I just trust them implicitly, and they make it so easy to imagine how everything would feel to my own skin.
This is an at-home, after-dark read. It will have you sweating and squirming, but also in awe of their closeness and the trust they have in each other. How endless their devotion is. How beautiful this story is. But let's be real, I'm also thinking about how fun their next round with this plant could be now that they're on the same page. Next time, with the walls completely down, they are going to have the most pleasurable night of their life for the rest of their lives.
Read it here, fic by ineffabildaddy, omens_for_ophelia
#good omens#good omens fanfiction#good omens fanfic#fanfic rec#aziracrow#good omens fic rec#aziraphale x crowley#creature of mine#ineffabildaddy#omens_for_ophelia#medium#five flames#sex pollen#canon au#snake crowley#naga crowley
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Does that age regression journal Charlie made for everyone actually exist? Because that sounds really helpful honestly. If it’s something you made up for the fix, would you consider posting how to make one irl?
It sadly does not exist. I made it up for a sander sides fic years ago...then never posted it 😅
So I recycled it for this fic because I loved the idea so much. (I still may post that fic someday but it'll be a bit.)
Anyway.
I will absolutely show you how to make one!
To demonstrate, I will use 💜's Jurnal because she's the only one who has a regression journal, lol. She was very nice in letting me use it.
(💜: It's got Patton's emblem on it 🥰)
(For context, we have DID/Osdd and 💜 is one of our headmates that regresses).
(I hope to make more for our other littles, but I just haven't gotten around to it yet.)
(📖: This notebook was actually a gift because it came in a set of baby Yoda notebooks, and our mom didn't want this one, 💜 loved it because she loves Patton on sander sides. And if you don't know what sander sides is, you should 100% binge it. It's on YouTube. Was made by the "story time" vine guy.)
(Anyway we used sticker paper and just printed it out for the notebook. I think it looks pretty cool.)
📝Step 1 is to find a nice notebook and decorate it in a way that makes you happy! (If you decide to use a notebook)
Now, I did this with a pen and some colored pencils ✏️ it's not fancy and it doesn't, need to be either.
If you'd rather type this all up on a computer and put it in a binder, that works too.
However you want to do this is perfect! You can use crayons, pencils, just keep it digitally. Whatever makes you the happiest ✨️
Intro page:
Age range: (💜 wrote 2-5)
Caregiver: (Name of caregiver) (if you don't have one, just don't add this question or you can write "myself" independence!)
Favorites 💕
Favorite color: (💜Wrote Purple)
Favorite show/movie: (💜Sander sides)
Favorite animal: (💜Wrote later, Butterflies and Cats)
Comfort 🧸
Comfort show/Movie: (💜Wrote Sander sides and bluey)
📝Show that helps calm you down or just provides some comfort. This can be different than your favorites or the same.
Comfort book:
📝What book makes you feel comfort? You can also write a fanfic if you want, 💜 did once I added this question to her journal. She may actually need a whole page of her comfort fics. Most are sander sides, and some are Loki, Hamilton, Brooklyn 99, exc. (Mostly SS fics by @childishfluff aka @logical-little-lies here on Tumblr. And @dannyisdone and freepoetrynightmare @agerestorybits onA03, they're great! Check them out! They made us want to start writing fics of our own)
Comfort food/drink (💜Milk, Angel milk)
Comfort idem: (💜Paci, Kitty stuffie, Jasper (a racoon stuffie) )
Add any other questions you want!
📝You can add any other info that might be important for a caregiver to remember or other stuff you want to share just for fun.
Okay now what you actually asked for:
The page in the fic...
Daily checkup 🌻
-Name/Date: (We don't often date things, but it would definitely be important for some)
-I am _ years old today (💜Wrote 5)
📝Just write your little age or ??? If you don't know.
-Today I: (Action, explain your day) (💜Wrote: played with kitties)
📝Explain your day, and probably give yourself more space than I put. Oops.
-I want my caregiver to know: (💜Wrote: I ❤️ U)
📝Great way to tell your cg something that is hard to say outloud. Or just something for fun. If you have no caregiver, feel free to replace this with: "I am feeling: ___ today because:"
You can add any negative emotions to process them.
- I feel _ about today (Good, Bad, Normal) because (give an explanation)
(💜Wrote: Good, because I got to be small)
📝looking at the day and processing any negative feelings or looking back at a happy day, you can smile about later!
-Tomorrow/Next time I want to: (What you hope to do next time you regress) (💜Wrote: Play with dolls)
📝Note for next time if there was something you didn't get to do that you wanted.
-Something bad about the day: (💜Wrote: Feel icky)
-Something good about the day: (💜Wrote: Got to small)
📝Looking at the positives and negatives of the day. It's okay if you can't find something.
If you can't think of something positive, you can write: "I can look forward to better days."
Then, at the bottom, I put a box that asks if the little finished answering the questions.
You can put any sticker or add a check mark ✅️ We just happen to find a yes sticker.
And here is a page of fun recipes for us to remember. 💜 loves to try new kinds of milk.
(Ignore the bad spelling lol)
Some of these I found here and some are on reddit. Just look up "Age regression milk recipes" and they should show up.
📖: There are a lot of really great journal prompts here on Tumblr that you can use as well. I didn't get any of these from tumblr, but I plan on expanding the journal evenentually and may use some I find on here.
Let me know if you guys would be interested in me posting any expansions we make for the journal. I plan on doing it for the fic, so I may post about it anyways.
If you guys decide to use this and post about it on your own blog, plz tag me! I'd love to see it!
Even if it's just a digital one or just a tumblr post. I'd love to see.
@todayimfour @ask-dusty-boy @trophyxtissues2 @abby5577 @im-not-paying-my-taxes @attagirljessy @thatsthat24 @legeufygeuber100 @stormy-is-hyperfixated
#ittybittysinners#ittybittysinnersq&h#age regression journal#age regression prompts#sfw age regression#sander sides agere#hazbin hotel agere#agere journal#agere journal prompts#age regressiom Journal Prompts.#Possum's agere stuff#possum's agere Journal#possum's ramblings
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Season 17 post restoration thoughts
Casually skipping 16 and going straight to 17 because lord knows I can’t afford to lose anymore braincells. I genuinely enjoy this season so I’m looking forward to the rewatch!
Ngl jumping straight from 15 to 17 really highlights how absurd this is like bro why is there gods and shit omg 😂
The fates are racist- that explains a lot
Donut my sweet baby boy
You know as much as I hate time travel stories this works way better for a “lets reference and call back to as many previous arcs and seasons as possible” nostalgia trip than Restoration did
Okay while I personally prefer the take that Donut is fully aware of all the innuendos he makes and is doing it to be a little shit I do think it being unintentional is really funny considering the ace Donut thing
“You have me all wrong” “I doubt it.” Donut the master at not getting gaslit
Donut knows Wash’s name is David- meaning Wash must have told all the reds and blues his real name
JESUS CHRIST DONT KILL JUNIOR
Felix is afraid of knives
Man I love it when Dr. Grey sounds like herself
We love insurance fraud
DONUT WASH TEAM UP MY BELOVED
Wash just silently shooting Donut again has me wheezing holy shit
The Wash and Carolina conflict is so freaking good man I love them
Man this season is just genuinely entertaining to watch despite everything- the way I wish we could’ve gotten this character writing with a better story
Oh what’s that a way to reference back to all the freelancers that includes Wyoming and the triplets. The concepts are wild again.
Also it’s just genuinely hilarious
WASH SCREAMING INSIDE HIS HELMET
DELTA OMG I FORGOT HE WAS IN THIS SEASON
I need to find the ost for when Wash and Carolina reunite and she’s saying how she trusts him and doesn’t know why bro this music is so pretty
Seriously I’m enjoying this as a nostalgia trip so much more than restoration
Oh I can feel my inner 15 year old desperately trying to take control of my body and send me down the carwash pipeline again holy shit- platonic or romantic. They’re good either way 🙂
OH GOD THE CABOOSE FEELS AGAIN THIS SHOULD BE ILLEGAL
Kai I love you with all my heart and soul but you do not disrespect Junior like that
STOP BEING MEAN TO DONUT HE IS DOING HIS BEST
Yes Caboose IS a genius and also my son
Kai messing with Tucker is glorious holy shit is that bit funny I love them
“Time is made of circles” what a nice, funny and succinct callback. Look at those concepts being wild.
Not Tucker dropping the “your mom” bit on Doc AGSKHAKS
HELL YEAH DONUT YOU FUCKING TELL THEM THATS MY BABY BOI!!!
PINK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Wash might be a competitor with Church for number one Donut Stan
Or simulation headcanon: Church is projecting his liking of Donut onto Wash
Okay but Donut should be in the caves not under the pelican FR PEOPLE STOP FORGETTING ABOUT THE CAVES!!!
Laughs in Spanish
I love competent Caboose and Donut
“My testicles send their regards” has no right being as badass as it is
Love a good Tucker moment- sure wish it wasn’t just redoing his character development that never should’ve been undone to begin with
OKAY BUT TUCKER AND DONUT MOMENT THO???? So good- can’t believe Donut is the “angsty bitch”
WASH AND CAROLINA AKDHAKBSKSHSKDHK
Love them talking about the AI like they’re Carolina’s siblings
Holy shit the voice acting between these two is so good
“If he’s single there’s no hope for any of us” sargington nation rise
Sarcastic Donut my beloved
I said this last time but seeing Church impaled by a golf club, even if it is actually Genkins, is entirely unnecessary bro I don’t wanna see that
THE LABYRINTH!!!
GOD CAROLINA VS CAROLINA AGAJSHKAH FROTHING AT THE MOUTH
Sarges vision is further proof that the correct ending for him is retirement
OKAY I STILL HATE THE LOPEZ VISION LISTEN I GET HE COMES BACK BUT ITS JUST IN POOR TASTE
“Don’t say toodles” LOVE sassy Donut so much
DOC BADASS MOMENT LETS GO
GRIF SIBLINGS MY BELOVED
Grif enlisted reveal you will always be famous to me
I never actually thought about it too deeply before but now that I am holy shit do I love that detail it’s so good and actually reminds me of my own brother who enlisted for similar reasons and regrets it now- seriously Grif enlisting is so realistic, a lot of kids sadly think the military is the only thing that can give them structure and purpose. It’s a great addition to the anti military themes of RvB
And yet- despite all these good red team moments- THEY FUCKING TURNED SIMMONS INTO A PENIS JOKE???? AND A BAD ONE AT THAT?????? COME ON S17 I THOUGHT YOU WERE BETTER THAN THIS THATS SOME S16 NONSENSE
TUCKER CANONICALLY HAS PANIC ATTACKS- the fact they kept his visions so vague is truly a CRIME
“Still got my penis” “what-“ GOD DAMN IT THAT ONE WAS ACTUALLY FUNNY COME ON I WAS TRYING TO MAKE A POINT EARLIER
AND WE DONT EVEN KNOW WHAT HAPPENED TO CABOOSE- honestly I know they probably didn’t have this arc planned back then but they should’ve used the labyrinth for Caboose to find closure in Church’s death rather than the Time Machine nonsense in s15. I feel like that would’ve been infinitely more interesting.
Carolina vs Carolina MY BELOVED HOLY SHIT I AM FROTHING AT THE MOUTH
OH FUCK THE FREELANCER TRAINING ROOM IM AKDHKAHSKSH THIS SHIT IS SO GOOD
GIGGLING KICKING MY FEET WE LOVE THE POWER OF FRIENDSHIP
Caboose gets it!!
GOD THE SLOW PIANO COVER OF BLOOD GULCH BLUES I CANT
AAAAAAAGGGGGGGHHHHHH
Man what nice fairly satisfying conclusions to everyone’s arc- don’t we love wild concepts.
Sure maybe it’s not anything super poetic or perfect like 13 but at least it makes sense
Hell I’ve even warmed up to Donut leaving! Bro deserves some him time and it’s not like he said it was permanent or anything… doesn’t that just really hit you in the wild concept 🙂
You know what- this season is genuinely such a delight at times. Im thinking about adding it to my regular rewatch list along with 1-13 as just like a little bonus I can have at the end cause it’s just such fun. Glorified fanfiction! We love to see it- maybe Restoration sucking was a blessing in disguise cause it really gave me a new appreciation for 15 and 17 (but 17 especially). I probably won’t rewatch 15 as much cause being honest I don’t really enjoy it in its entirety as much as 17 but it’s got good moments I love.
Now- I know the logical thing for me to do is go back and watch 16 and then Restoration but here’s the thing… I don’t want to.
I genuinely do not enjoy those seasons. I don’t want to put myself through something that’s just gonna make me angry and bitter just for the sake of giving commentary on them- not right now anyway. Maybe one day I’ll feel like being a bit salty and do it but that’s just really not how I want to spend my time with my favorite show. I’ve already rewatched any clips from restoration that I cared to rewatch and I don’t think any of my feelings on it are gonna change. And I’ve seen 16 enough times to know my feelings won’t change.
Now what I am considering doing is rewatching 1-13 for the 20th time (<- accurate number, I’ve kept count over the years) and continuing to do these thought posts cause they’re good fun to do! So who knows whenever the time comes you’ll probably have to deal with more of my insane ramblings 😂
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guys wake up new C coloring pic just dropped <333 have some teefs i drew awhile ago that i probably never posted here
#this was a banger drawing and C made it so much cooler with the paint splatter ty for the addition#also it makes me happy to hear you like how i draw nero bc. i dont know how to draw him actually ahsdghkajd hes very hard to draw#anyway. sparda chompers supremacy. these boys have sharp teeth and they WILL bite someone with them#devil may cry#dante(dmc)#vergil(dmc)#nero(dmc)#fan's colorings#everything from here on out is directed at C bc i have no other ways to talk to them so you guys can stop reading here <3#hey C! i actually didnt see what your first submission was bc i didnt even receive it lmao#but i just want to say that you dont have to worry about anything; what i said the other day wasnt directed at you at all#i do enjoy the little stories you have whenever your submit things; they seem to be pretty personal stories and i appreciate that you trust#me enough to tell me about them.#if you'd feel better not sharing any more that's fine! i'm never going to mention anything in them anywhere regardless#i'll just keep posting your colorings as usual for everyone to see and appreciate :)#hope you have a great day C! and thanks again for always coloring my stuff!#allyart
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a friend who'd wait :)
#im posting this very late because i was sort of weary of how it came out and ended up messing w it until it was like 4am oops.#and i have plans tmrw so... oh well! i did my best and ill put it out while i can!#and i tried to make the scene match barnard's colors lol#finn's ocs#finn's art#i know i said id do more sillay stuff with the simpler screentone only style but i had a couple more of these in me#and this is the first piece im making thats like an actual part of the story too rather than just setting stuff for fun#i wanna write something to go with it too but for now ill just sort of briefly explain the context in the tags here:#barnard has a pretty bad case of OCD and his compulsions have made it difficult to make friends in the past#he was never outright bullied or anything but people just didnt really have the patience to deal with it#he has compulsions that include stuff like walking through doors until it feels right and needing things to be perfectly aligned#which in group settings has lead to people having to wait for him to finish his rituals and join them#they might find it tolerable at first but eventually they grow impatient and hes just... not invited to stuff anymore#but juno is a newer member of the guild who ends up frequenting the same library. hes also kinda a little weird#and they dont become fast friends or anything but just sort of naturally spend time in the same place#though they never plan meetups they eventually fall into a routine. around the same time theyd just both be at the library#and read next to each other. and maybe talk a bit. and eventually they end up walking back to the guildhall together#since theyre going to the same place after all. and juno always waits for barnard outside the door#eventually barnard asks if this bothers him. juno kinda just tells him 'of course it does' without any malice or anything. just a statement#barnard is surprised and apologizes and juno says not to. but the next day juno doesnt show up at the usual time.#barnard assumes hes committed somekinda more by bringing it up. he ends up staying there late reading to get his mind off it & not ruminate#but when he leaves juno is in fact still waiting for him down the hall (see pic) having collected a bunch of books literally abt ocd#he fell asleep bc barnard stayed later than expected. and hes an eepy guy generally. and also one very bad at expressing himself#but now barnard gets that juno's 'of course it [bothers me]' had the implication of 'but its worth it' which no friend has previously done.#and from the interaction juno was also able to understand that this isn't something barnard just does for the hell of it so. he studies.#and checks a bunch of stuff out because he thinks it could help his friend too (theres ocd workbooks and such- i remember working w them)#and thats the point where they became more ''friends'' than ''pleasant library acquaintances''#from there on they also do get into juno's problems. whole other bag of worms. but this specific scene is more about bernard from his pov#sorry about when i said briefly explain. i lied </3#but compared to the whole sequence im picturing its brief so shhh
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Regarding the previous post, I think the way I approach trying to evaluate a piece of art is asking "Do I think the positive things I get out of it outweigh the parts of it that I don't like?" And when I call something a "guilty pleasure" song/show/book/piece of media/etc. it's really more in the sense of, "Given who I am as a person, the flaws I've found in this should be complete dealbreakers for me, but somehow they aren't, and it makes me feel like I'm having an identity crisis."
#like. I think something like...idk shiki or cxgf excels on multiple levels. I understand why I like them. given the things I look for in art#it makes sense that these shows would speak to me because they make the effort to showcase those things I look for. because the people#in charge of those works clearly valued the same kinds of things and cared about seriously exploring them.#but with something like. uh. ctrlz. that is NOT the case and I frequently found myself going 'why would anyone make this writing#decision?' but I still sat through all 3 seasons of it! I still really enjoyed it! those flaws SHOULD have made me give up according to#personal history but they never did. and I very very much genuinely question why. I have NO IDEA why I still care about this#silly convoluted teen drama show so much. but I do. I wrote SO MANY FUCKING POSTS ABOUT IT.#I really love wicked the musical. I've heard many people call it 'hokey' or 'cheesy' or 'objectively bad' but here's the thing! I DON'T#think it's bad!!! like literally at all!!!!!! and it does do some genuinely cool things in regard to the music and the way the characters#develop and what the show says about the nature of prejudice and human connection. is it like. idk Serious™ the way that something like#Parade is? no. but it doesn't have to be. it does what it sets out to do and it does it well and this is why the whole '''objective#evaluation''' thing doesn't actually mean anything. I value thoughtfully-constructed music and dynamic female characters#(which this musical has). I value stories that deal with the complex and messy feelings that come with being a human (which this musical#has). I value stories about 'other'ness and romantic subplots that aren't just built on 'This Girl Is Pretty' (which this musical has).#and I value professional displays of technical vocal ability because I know how fucking DIFFICULT that is (which this musical...if you cast#it well...has).#if you value something else in a musical then yeah you will probably think THIS one is '''objectively bad'''#if you don't see the point of musicals as an art form you will probably think wicked is '''objectively bad'''#do you see where the problem with categorizing analysis like this is??
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okay I'm not expecting anyone to care all that much, but I was looking at the prompts for the 18th Day of Gift-Giving for my Olli/Allu fic advent calendar and I'm between two options on what to do with them, so if anyone out there wants to put in their two cents...
(see the pros and cons in the tags of the original post)
#on one hand i'd like to write a standalone with a storyline of its own#because that way i could probably manage to write a better story#on the other hand i kinda feel like i should focus on the main plot after all the standalones i've posted this week#but if i stick to the main plot my options would be more limited 🤔#because i don't feel like making either of them have a random headache/migrain or some kinda personal crisis#just for the sake of the prompt#i know there's barely any plot to begin with but i still don't want to make it too scattered 😅#i have an idea that would work alright for the main story and it would probably turn out cute enough#but some of the other prompts that wouldn't really work for the main story are soooooooo tempting#and i mean. at least 4 or 5 of the stories for next week will be related to the main plot#plus the stories for the 16th and the 17th#so there'd still be plenty for that too!#i'm probably gonna make my own decision regardless of the voting result but i'd like to hear from you anyway#i've never made a poll before and i'm kinda nervous about this lol i really am expecting this to get maybe 3 votes max 🤡#i hate how the title is so huge pls don't be annoyed with me i'm sorry for existing i promise i'll never make a post ever again 😭#not putting this in any tags. you see this if you see this
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