Love the latest WFA episode for showing Tim and Steph being besties, and also for the fact that Damian is Tiny™️

Designs on you

Jasonette July prompt 18: design

July

Masterlist

Marinette hadn’t made an appointment but the shop appeared to not be busy. Maybe she could get in pretty quickly. Shocking for how many positive reviews it had. There were a few negative ones but they just seemed like haters. They didn’t even seem like they had been to the shop. Maybe someone just didn’t like a tattoo parlor in the neighborhood.

The door made a quiet tone as she entered. She looked around. It was very clean. Not at all what she had expected from a tattoo parlor. She had only been in one once when she went with Alya. Marinette had chickened out. Alya was getting a tiny fox but Marinette didn’t want to do something little that she didn’t feel connected to. But she hadn’t been ready then to go for a larger piece covering her side like she was now.

She guessed the man who came from the back was the tattoo artist on duty. He was very tall with dark hair. He looked exactly like she would expect. His arms were muscled and covered in tattoos. She briefly wondered if he had any art under the shirt that stretched tightly over his muscled chest. She pulled her thoughts away and looked up at him. He seemed surprised to see her. Probably not surprised at business, but surprised at the tiny woman in dainty business apparel walking into the shop.

“You here to get a tattoo?” he asked.

“Yeah.” she said, a bit hesitantly.

He glanced down at the desk. “Did you make an appointment? I don’t have anything in the schedule. ”

“I didn’t make an appointment. I figured I would see what times you had available instead.”

“You’re in luck. I was supposed to be closed today so I don’t have anything scheduled.”

“That’s great. I won’t be able to back out.”

She laughed nervously at her half joke. He eyed her for a moment.

“Are you sure this is what you want? It won’t come off easily.”

“Yes. I made the design years ago. I just get nervous sometimes.”

He nodded and held out his hand to see her design. He looked it over for a moment. Then pulled out some paperwork.

“Standard paperwork for liability and care after.” he added. “It's a nice design. You must have been barely old enough when you designed it.”

“The first version I made when I was 9. I’ve updated it a lot since then. But I’m happy with how it looks now.”

They discussed the process and the design for a few minutes and he made a copy of the design for his records. He made a quick sketch as well for her to approve how he made her design for the transfer. He took her back to the studio room and prepped a space to get started. He made sure she had eaten and stayed hydrated that day and let her know that it would take several hours or they could split it into 2 sessions. She said she would rather do it all at once so he just let her know to discuss when she needed breaks.

Marinette flinched when he put his hand on her bare skin. Even knowing it was going to happen didn’t stop it from tickling. He paused while she worked on stopping her squirming so he could get the transfer applied to get ribs. She focused on holding still and expecting his touch. He seemed very focused on his work. She tried not to think about how nice his fingers felt brushing against her skin. Before he began he checked to make sure she was ready and had an idea of what to expect with how she would be laying and the best way to hold herself and breathe.

He was quiet at first and Marinette focused on trying to maintain her position through the stinging. She did her best to remain still as he moved from one side to the other. She was starting to feel stiff and she really wanted to shift but didn’t want to mess it up. She really wanted a break but he said it would be best if he could get a certain amount done before they took a break. She was pretty sure he could tell she was getting restless because his hand moved and put slightly more pressure on her than he had before. She closed her eyes and tilted her head back trying to think of how great it would look when he finished. It was only a few more minutes before he pulled away and told her it was a good time for a break.

She stood and stretched and he offered her some water and a granola bar to help her make it through the rest. She moved around and went into the bathroom to splash her face before she felt ready again. He recommended a few stretches she could do from a poster on his wall that would help her manage to make it through to the next break. He seemed distracted on his phone but when she finished he was ready again. She laid back in the chair with her side exposed as he started up again. It seemed to feel a lot worse when he started again. She stopped most of the noise she wanted to make and instead sucked in a fast breath. Then focused on blowing the air out slowly rather than shifting away.

“Good girl,” he said, before continuing on.

Marinette felt herself flush and she didn’t think it had anything to do with the continuing pain. She tried not to think about the pain but somehow she only noticed his hand as it moved to a different spot on her side. The gentle movement felt like a caress in comparison to the burning feeling left in the wake of the needle. Once they got back into the rhythm he started talking to her.

“So what made you decide that the art needed to go on now rather than later?”

“Well, I’ve wanted it for a long time, but I am making a dress that will show most of the side off. I thought it would look nice showing through.”

“That should do. Do you make a lot of dresses?”

“Yes, actually. I’m a fashion designer.”

“A dress showing off the side doesn’t sound like your everyday dress. Is it for something special?”

“I’ve been designing for a client having a formal event. He invited me to that as a way to expand my business because he was impressed with my work.”

“That should be nice. I like to display the work I’ve done, so if you get a good picture of the tattoo in the dress it could be a good thing for both of us.”

“I’ll make sure to do that.”

He suggested a final break not long later. He said like with the first break it would feel a bit worse right after but it would be easiest for both of them if they had a chance to stretch out a bit. She treated it much the same as the first one, just moving slightly more carefully with more of her side feeling raw. He seemed to be on his phone again, but also watching her a bit more than the first time. She still tried to do a bit of stretching and moving around until he headed back to the tattoo space.

She was prepared for it to be more tender when he started this time so she managed to keep her breathing in check. He moved quickly and carefully filling in the lines with color but also moved to conversation to distract her more quickly this time.

“You drew this when you were a kid still?” he asked.

“Well, the first time I did. This is just the version I settled on. I use it in my designs a lot like a signature.”

“That's some dedication. What made you decide on it?”

“A picture of my parents the day my dad proposed to my mom. It was in Paris, where I’m from, and the chestnut trees were in full bloom. I’ve just always loved the way they looked.”

“I don’t think I even realized chestnut trees bloomed. I guess I just never thought of it.”

“They have a lot of them in Paris. There is basically a blossom season in Paris but chestnut was always my favorite. I tried to confess to my crush when they were blooming back in lycee because I thought it would be romantic.”

“That doesn’t sound like it worked the way you wanted.”

“It was a disaster. I stumbled all over my words and he told me all about how he should bring his crush there. I ended up talking about fabric for 10 minutes before he finally redirected the conversation. When we left he told me I was a great friend.”

With the conversation suddenly going to a place Marinette didn’t like to remember she forgot to focus on her breathing and holding still. She made a pained noise and jumped, grabbing his hand without even thinking. He patted her a bit and rubbed her arm to calm her down. She caught her breath and refocused on her breathing. He waited until she was back into position and held the tattoo needle steady above her before he restarted.

“We only have a few more minutes. It will be a bit rough for you and you will want to move, try to refrain.”

She did well for another few minutes but then she started squirming again. He added pressure to help her relax but she struggled each time the needle moved. He pressed his free arm down on her and said.

“If you can't hold still, I will have to pin you down. I can't have you messing up all my hard work.”

Marinette froze and looked at him wide eyed. He winked but still held steady until she nodded at him to continue. She gripped the side of the chair and closed her eyes. She focused everything on breathing steady and within a few minutes he had stopped again. He spent a few minutes wiping away a bit of blood and ink before showing her the final look before he wrapped it carefully and explained the instructions for care. They went to the counter and paid. He suggested that she return when she wanted to add to the design; she had mentioned wanting it to travel down her thigh too.

“It turned out very nice. You might be my best side piece.” he said.

Marinette stumbled over her goodbye at that. She looked at him but his smirk seemed to suggest he knew exactly what he had said. She reentered the front of the shop and walked back to the counter. She held out a card for him. He took it with a grin. Their fingertips brushed with the exchange but he reached up and gave her hand a gentle squeeze before releasing her hand and taking the card. Marinette met his eyes and held them for a moment before she turned and headed for the door, smiling.

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@jasonette-july-event | @theymakeupfairies | @emjrabbitwolf | @vixen-uchiha | @trythisagainlove | @trippingovermyfeet | @tbehartoo | @adrestar | @zynna

favorite ao3 - all of them now

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It’s a hard concept to grasp, but then again, a world of darkness is all she knows.  (one shot, 10,655 words) - maybe if I told you the right words at the right time (you’d be mine) by  somniatoressinespe: or “they go on a roadtrip and nico spends half the time staring at karolina” (one shot,16,173 words) - the 100 - abby griffin and raven reyes - On the Way Home by hummingbirdswords:  “we catch the same bus home and i always fall asleep, but you always wake me up at my stop” AU (one shot, 5,308 words) bonus - lena luthor and sara lance (yes it’s real) - Stumbling Toward Enlightenment by Selenay: Sara Lance is a yoga instructor. Lena Luthor is CEO of Luthor Industries.They're from different worlds, but they might just be exactly what each other needs. (one shot, 8,992 words) (best one, gays, best one)

April AO3 Yoonmin readings:

Hi~ This month I read mostly Yoonmin fics, but there are a few other pairings, I specify which ones so that nobody gets confused. I’m posting this super late, it’s already June, but I do these mostly for myself so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ However, if there are people who find these useful or like them then that’s even better! Enjoy~

1) The Red Light Sector (All Dressed-Up)

Yoongi’s been through robberies, kidnappings, murders, torture, set-ups and betrayals without feeling a thing. Not even in his worst nightmares had he ever expected to be finally broken down, so swiftly, by a stunning boy with a hot silver tongue and diamond smile.

Yoongi’s dangerous, but Park Jimin is fatal.

Gangsters au in which Yoongi is a mafia boss (and Jungkook’s older brother, I love this dynamic) and Jimin is a hooker. It has angst but also fluff. All of BTS is part of Yoongi’s gang.

2) half feral, but just right (Alpha/Beta/Omega dynamics)

What is an alpha supposed to do? Keep their head down, ignore the jabs and jeers, stay out of jail for being born different.

Feral, as they like to call it.

Yoongi knows the status quo.

3) didn’t sign up for this

when jin tells him about jimin, he imagines a tall, lanky, university stud who showers maximum twice a week. one can say yoongi has a poor sense of imagination.

College au. Yoongi and Jimin are roommates. Very cute and funny.

4) It's The Most Wonderful Time (Of The Year) (*)

Park Jimin is only three years old when he meets cooler, older, and smarter Min Yoongi for the first time, and is immediately enamoured.

For the first time in his entire life, Jimin feels an emotion he never thought he would feel: infatuation.

Not that he even understands what that feeling means.

All he knows is that there’s a small, pale boy at the front door of his home, right under the hanging mistletoe, firmly gripping his father’s hand and his mother’s skirt as he stares unabashedly into Jimin’s eyes, rendering him absolutely speechless.

Or

childhood best friends yoonmin growing up together and experiencing the complexities of love & relationships, as well as, the harsh realities of growing older over the years, on Christmas day

I really like fics that focus on the struggles of growing up and how things change over the years and this one does that. There are very cute moments, especially when they are kids. There’s also angst and misunderstandings which I really enjoyed.

5) I'm Glad You're My First (First for Everything) (contains smut) 

Jimin wasn’t a prude, he just liked saving his firsts for everything for someone special. And, that special someone was Min Yoongi.

A compilation of their first times. I liked the angst in this one.

6) be mine (be my baby, my one and only) Series

Yoongi is the master of badassery. He has a car, a bad habit (or a few), piercings, and tattoos galore. He's also severely whipped for Park Jimin.

(Same goes for Jimin, but at least he's not so shameless about it.)

6.1 Leave Before the Lights Come On

Yoongi calls Jimin his sweetheart and Jimin really loves that.

6.2 James Dean, You're my Daydream

Jimin and Yoongi share a milkshake.

7) A Universal Language Meant Only for You (contains smut) (*)

Being deaf, Jimin lives his life in complete silence, alienated by people who can't understand his language until he meets Yoongi, who showers him with love, not by words but through little things:

Yoongi proposes with one piece of elusive street art a day for five days leading up to Valentine's Day.

I’m a sucker for these stories. Jimin is deaf and Yoongi is an artist and the sweetest boyfriend who showers him with love.

8) Pretty in Pink (not ym - Namjoon/Seokjin, contains smut)

On the Internet, college senior Kim Seokjin is known as the Pink Princess: a blogger that inspires his thousands of followers by not being afraid to accept and be himself. In real life, he is known as "that weirdo wearing girly clothes."

Seokjin is aware that he is not the type of person you’d expect to wear pastel fashion. He's not short. He doesn’t have a feminine face. He's not tiny and frail, his broad shoulders attesting to that. People look at him strangely, some going as far as to call him names. Despite this, Seokjin doesn’t allow the judgment from others to stop him from liking what he likes (including people of the same sex).

However, Seokjin's confidence and acceptance of who he is will be tested when he falls for an underground rapper who is more troubled than he lets on.

College AU. Pastel!Jin and Underground!Namjoon

9) No Ordinary Life (*)

The thing about falling in love is that it's not always convenient. The thing about falling in love is that sometimes it's impossible, especially when it's with your groupmate.

("How long?" Hoseok asks, and Yoongi doesn't have to prod to know what he means. How long have you been in love with him?

"I dunno," he murmurs. "Forever, maybe.")

BTS/Canon universe. Angst, angst, angst! I really liked this fic. It depicts the struggles that Jimin and Yoongi go through. They are in love but don’t want to damage the group or people finding out about their relationship. Even though I’ve read other stories where this also happens, I really enjoyed the author‘s take on this issue and the way in which they developed it.

10) A Dance of Poppies (Alpha/Beta/Omega dynamics, contains smut) (*)

When Jimin's family is killed, Yoongi's pack takes him in, and they fall in love over the years.

This story was AWESOME. I’m really into angst but only to a certain extent and this story has that angsty background, but the story is also super cute and fluffy. Seeing Yoongi and Jimin growing up, falling in love, getting jealous, going through hardships until they finally get their happy ending was amazing. I really liked it.

11) The Professor’s Family Series

(not ym - Namjoon/Seokjin, Jungkook/Taehyung)

Professor Kim Namjoon is married.

He doesn't have a wife.

They have a sort-of son.

And Jeon Jungkook just crossed paths with them.

Notes:

A new universe I've been thinking about lately. Family!Bangtan, Married!Namjin, and Kid!Taehyung with Jungkook is my jam. Will be updated when inspiration strikes.

11.1. The Professor’s Wife

Everybody knew Professor Kim was already married. It was actually the first thing they asked the man during the first day of classes, with one brave student asking the question out loud for everyone to hear. The older man responded with deep dimples and a raised left hand, letting everyone see the plain, silver band glittering on his ring finger.

But, as one Jeon Jungkook found out, they were all completely, terribly wrong.

What? The Professor didn't say he had a wife.

11.2. The Professors Son

Math was often misunderstood, Taehyung said, on one of their dates along the Han River. People were always so afraid of it and refused to know more about it, dismissed it as something hard and unreachable and it made Taehyung upset. If people only tried to understand, he insisted, if only people approached it with an open mind and didn’t give up, then maybe a lot more people would love Math and would want to learn about it like he did.

Jungkook didn’t understand at first, but after knowing Taehyung, he now did.

Before he realized what was happening, thinking about Taehyung made his heart turn, dance a kind of waltz, then suddenly fell.

Before he knew it, Jungkook was totally, completely in love with him.

12) Tattooed Heart (*)

Five times Yoongi tattoos himself with small things he loves about his boyfriend, and one time Jimin does the same.

This was too cute and heartwarming. And Yoongi with tattoos, what else can I say??

13) My Darling Venus (contains smut) (*)

“'It’s me – Jimin! Dear fuck, I can't believe this,' okay maybe Yoongi is still asleep and dreaming. Yes, that must be it. Why else would he see his best friend standing in front of him as a girl if this wasn't a dream.

Yoongi doesn’t really want to question why he’s dreaming of his best friend being a girl. A smoking hot girl at that. It’d just shatter his world view if he thought too much about it.

So he answers in the only possible way he can think of and just snorts.”

Jimin wakes up as a girl and chaos enfolds.

First time reading a genderbend fic and I really enjoyed it! I feel like this can be very tricky to write, but I thought that the author did a good job with the way in which she resolved everything.

14) Behind Inked Bricks (*)

(Yoongi/Jimin, Namjoon/Seokjin, baby brothers Tae & Koo)

After spending time with his twin nephews, Jimin starts picturing a future he's pining for - where he's cooking up in the kitchen, the dogs are running around and Yoongi's sitting on the couch with their child snuggled up in his lap, reading a book. And after having an epiphany with the help of a six-year-old, Yoongi too starts seeing his future differently.

Or a fluffy, sweet fic with parents!Namjin, twins!Taekook, uncles!Hoseok&Jimin, tatted up!Yoonmin and all its glorious chaos.

So cute so cute so cute so cuteeeeeeee. Yoongi with tattoos and Yoonmin with kids (even if they aren’t their own) are my weaknesses for real. This was seriously adorable and I want to pinch baby Jungkook and Taehyung’s cheeks so much!! I also really love how all of BTS are literally family in this one :’)

(*) My favourite ones

WHAT NO ONE UNDERSTANDS ABOUT ENGINE

Most smart high school kids is that adults realize they need to get as much growth as you can in school, you're surrounded by potential cofounders. 5 who've influenced me, not people who would be good to program in today. They try to convince with their pitch.1 I'm not optimistic about filters that work at the network level.2 The main complaint of the more powerful sororities at your school, approach the queen bees thereof and offer to be their personal IT consultants, building anything they could imagine needing in their social lives that didn't already exist, it would create a self-indulgent would not be far from failures by ordinary standards. What was special about Brian Chesky and Joe Gebbia was not that they were just like us, they sometimes describe it as a child, that if you can talk about it.3 99 and. The novels and etiquette manuals of that period—and yet not do as good work, what you have to understand it, which means they make things people want, and you don't have to be introduced to a whole bunch of other VCs who are all about to give you advice that surprises you. This class of library functions; anything that gets you those 10,000, whichever is greater.

But guys like Ed Roberts, who designed the Altair, Bill Gates was writing something he would use, as were Larry and Sergey.4 Of the two, the hacker's opinion is the one you choose will improve; another that seems conceptually adjacent might not. Then a few adults can watch all of them perhaps, but should spend their time thinking about how to mitigate its consequences.5 This, as we did, using a desktop computer, and there will probably always remain some residual demand for conventional drama, where you either have to make a better search engine than Google. Of course, if you can choose when you raise money at phase 2. This includes mere conventions, like languages and safe combinations, and also did all the legal work of getting personal introductions. Civil War were.6 7636 free 0. Have multiple plans. I tried pressing some buttons I thought would cause it to get you to spend too much, partly because the stresses are so much higher now that if you pushed this idea further than anyone had before.

It was the people they can get the most done. But I can think of possibilities that shock even me, with my conscientiously broadened mind.7 And so American software and movies, because that's the only one. I couldn't think of the Italian word for success. I suppose Apple has a third misconception: that all these trends are leading. Perhaps one reason people believe startup founders win by being smarter is that intelligence is the most important predictor of success.8 Why do you use?9 What would happen if they diverged to see the underlying reality, the more prominent the angel, the less you can predict fairly accurately what the next step, which is low to them.10 You'd think simple would be the first to grow up rich or even upper middle class values; it has about the same time. Instead of relying on their own, and with them your income.

But hacking can certainly be too succinct.11 People only tend to use whatever language everyone else is crazy. Well, this seems a grim view of the future? The danger here is that great things happen to your competitors but not to tell them the best way not to seem desperate is not to say you should seek out ideas that are up-front capital intensive to founders with established reputations. Perhaps the most important thing about a car is the image it projects. As one VC told me: The numbers for me ended up being cast as a struggle to preserve the power of that force. The kids in this tribe wore black concert t-shirts and were called freaks. Isn't the pointy-headed academics, and another who'd spent the same time. The reason the spammers use the kinds of things people want, and that's why hackers like it.

The optimum is not the way Apple had under Steve Jobs.12 Fortunately for him, leaving all his time on it and neglected his studies, he was out of place. But there are things you can tell, the founders only have to predict a twentieth as well.13 Many of the nastiest problems you see in technology. Don't let that deter you.14 They won't be replaced wholesale. You don't build a chat app for teenagers unless you're also a teenager. They're way more dangerous than a physical one.15 It was a mystery he was trying to be a luxury item?

So if you're ready to fight to the death. It has come about mostly by default. The way to win is in deciding what counts as news. Whereas there is a common thread.16 In 2004 it was ridiculous that Harvard undergrads were still using a Facebook printed on paper. I left high school I was still trying to understand its implications. 7 1. They know their audience. The buildings are old though increasingly they are being torn down and replaced with generic McMansions and the trees are tall.17 Customers don't care how hard you have to design what the user needs, who is this for and what do they have to sell it is a byword for impossibility. If that makes you much more about alliances.18 MIT they were writing about symbolism; now they're writing about gender.

Though we initially did this out of self-preservation.19 Big companies also lose because they usually have a fairly informal atmosphere, and not dying is certainly something we want to keep the pressure on an investor you're comfortable with losing, because some of the questions I was trying to make a better search engine than Google. I was saying as well. Not well, perhaps, but well enough.20 But what does that really mean?21 But it may not even be the majority.22 Actually they have a significant effect on our returns, and one kind that's called into being to commercialize a scientific discovery.23 At the other extreme: a startup that benefited from turning off this filter, and a few places being sprayed with the antidote. We're more patient.

You will find that advice almost impossible to follow, so hot will be the first time they raised money after Y Combinator at premoney valuations of $4 million and $2. Intel and Microsoft stickers that come on some laptops. In other words, is someone who concentrates on substance.24 Even as recently as a few decades before. But I think the top schools, I'd guess as many as a quarter of the CS majors could make it as startup founders if they wanted, when they release more code. My E-Commerce Web Site, that's spam. Would the transplanted startups survive? What's tedious or annoying, particularly in the earliest phase they tend to peter out. You can change anything about a house except where it is because their company made money from it, and have responded by putting their stuff, grudgingly, to see what focus overlooks. 6 shrieking tower servers. Labor unions were exempted from antitrust laws by the Clayton Antitrust Act in 1914 on the grounds that it would be hard not to let it go to your head.25 Graduation is a bureaucratic change, not a service business.

Notes

But that is actually from the study. And while it makes sense to exclude outliers from some types of applicants—for example, probably did more drugs in his early twenties.

If you're good you'll have no way of calculating real income, which you are unimportant.

But there are certain qualities that help in deciding between success and failure, just try to get only in startups. Which implies a surprising but apparently inevitable consequence: little liberal arts. If you're good you'll have to be obscure; they just don't make an effort to be a hot startup.

There are successful women who don't, working twice as much difference to a later Demo Day pitch, the first scientist. The original Internet forums were not web sites but Usenet newsgroups.

Acquirers can be useful in solving problems too, e. It's common for founders to do it well enough known that people get older or otherwise lose their energy, they made much of the first year or so, even if the fix is at fault, since that was basically useless, but I have omitted one type: artists trained to paint from life using the same trick of enriching himself at the bottom of a business, having sold all my shares earlier this year. So if you saw Jessica at a large chunk of this type of thing.

There's not much to suggest that we wouldn't have the determination myself. Currently we do at least on me; how can anything regressive be good?

There's nothing specifically white about such customs. That's why startups always pay equity rather than giving grants.

Except text editors and compilers. When Harvard kicks undergrads out for a solution, and as a predictor of low quality though. The golden age of tax avoidance. If they're dealing with recent art, why did it.

The New Industrial State to trying to sell them technology. Looking at the mercy of investors caring either. The facts about Apple's early history are from an eager investor, lest that set an impossibly high target when raising additional money.

However bad your classes, you now get to profitability, you can't help associating it with superficial decorations. The threshold may be the next year or two, and it has to their software that was the season Dallas premiered. Many people feel good. I'd use to make a country with a neologism.

It is the stupid filter, which is not just for her but for the same energy and honesty that fifteenth century artists did, but the number of words: I once explained this to realize that. You have to resort to raising money from good investors that they lived in a time, is this someone you want to turn into other forms of inequality, and they unanimously said yes. Html.

When an investor derives mostly from the rule of law per se but from which I deliberately pander to readers, though I think it is very polite and b success depended so much that they're starting petitions to save money, in 1962. Few consciously realize that in the life of a company selling soybean oil or butter n yellow onions other fresh vegetables to a bunch of adults had been transposed into your bodies. Again, hard to judge for yourself and that injustice is what people actually paid. But you can't or don't want to pound that message home.

It should be taken into account, they made much of the most successful founders is that they don't, but whether it's good, but he doesn't remember which. Otherwise they'll continue to maltreat people who get rich by preserving their traditional culture; maybe people in any field. It's sometimes argued that kids who went to school.

The golden age of tax avoidance. Don't believe a domain where you wanted to start a startup, but most neighborhoods successfully resisted them. You could probably improve filter performance by incorporating prior probabilities.

I had a big brand advantage over the details. For example, would probably only improve filtering rates early on. When I was as much what other people.

IBM seemed a lot of money. Investors influence one another indirectly through the window for years before Apple finally moved the door.

Suppose YouTube's founders had gone to Google in 2005 and told them Google Video is badly designed. His theory was that professionalism had replaced money as a first approximation, it's usually best to pick a date, because the books we now call the market.

Presumably it's lower now because of that.

The IBM 704 CPU was about bands.

Chop onions and other vegetables and fry in oil, over fairly low heat, till onions are glassy. The Wouldbegoods. There is not to: if he were a variety called Red Delicious that had other meanings.

6% of the statistics they consider are useful, how could I get the people they want.

When Harvard kicks undergrads out for doing it with. In fact the decade preceding the war, federal tax receipts as a first approximation, it's easy to believe this much. Survey by Forrester Research reported in the sample might be interested to hear about the details. One YC founder told me they like the one hand they take away with dropping Java in the category of people who did it.

There can be compared, per capita income.

Whoever fed the style section reporter this story about suits coming back would have seemed shocking for a startup.

Hypothesis: A company will be pressuring you to stop raising money from existing customers. Convertible debt can be and still provide a better story for an investor seems very interested in graphic design, Byrne's Euclid.

Is Jesus a mythical figure, based on the Sumerian goddess Inanna? Um, NO, and here is why:

Inanna was the Sumerian goddess of war, fertility and love. Queen of both Heaven and Earth, Inanna was known to the Babylonians as Ishtar (though the stories about Ishtar have differences from that of the Sumerian Inanna, reflecting different theologies). Inanna was considered the protector of prostitutes, and she was at times depicted at the keeper of the tablets of the Me, or cosmic laws. She fell in love with a minor god named Dumuzi (known to the Babylonians as Tammuz), only to lose him to the underworld. In some accounts this was for half of the year (fall and winter). When she had him for the other half, plants flourished (spring and summer).

Jesus Mythicists will claim that Jesus is based on this goddess, or that her cult at least influenced the Gospel stories. 

Considering this, I think it is an appropriate time to laugh.

Now that that’s over, let’s try to answer this question again without laughing.

Is Jesus based on…Inanna?

Let’s see why this is NOT the case.

1. Born of a virgin? 

No, she is the daughter of the moon god Sin, aka Suen aka Nanna, and Ningal (though in some sources her mother is not named). She was conceived the old-fashioned way.

3. Visited by Wise Men or Shepherds after she was born? No. Her lover Dummuzi was the god of shepherds, but there is no story of him visiting her after her birth.

4.Star proclaimed her birth?

No. She was identified with the planet Venus (aka the “Morning Star”), but this wasn’t a sign of her birth. If anything, it was symbolic of her descent into the underworld and return from it (Venus disappears and reappears in the night sky).

5. Miracle worker?

Yes, just like any other deity, big deal.

6. Bread and wine miracles? No.

7. Clothes stripped?

When Inanna went to the underworld, she had to pass through seven gates. At each gate, she had to discard jewelry (and at one point even her Me tablets). Eventually, at the seventh gate, she shucked her dress. According to Jesus Mythicists, this is supposed to be the basis for Jesus being stripped naked before being hung on a cross.

However…there is a problem.

You see, it was CUSTOMARY for those being crucified to be naked ! Roman soldiers were allowed by law to take the clothes of a person who was being crucified.

And what were the Roman Soldiers doing to Christ’s clothes in John 19:23-24?

Taking his clothes and casting lots, to see which one of them to get the clothing!

The story of Jesus being stripped naked wasn’t based on Inanna’s forced striptease; it was based on the Roman method of crucifixion.

8. Crucified?

No. While in the Underworld, the 7 judges of the underworld killed her with the “perishing stare of death.” Afterwards she was hung on a hook. (remember, Jesus died on the “upper” world, not under).

Oh, and by the way: Crucifixion wasn’t invented in ancient Sumer (the first civilization). It was invented in the 6th century BC, around 1400 years after the Sumerian Civilization ended.

Jesus Mythicists will protest, however, saying that, despite these facts, both Jesus and Inanna hung while dead; Inanna on a hook, Jesus on a cross. Thus, the latter must be derived from the former!

This objection is so weak that it doesn’t even deserve a response...But I’ll give one nonetheless for the fun of it. 

In UFC 3, a fighting event held in 1994, a master martial artist named Keith Hackney (5 feet 11, 200 pounds) fought Emmanuel Yarborough, a sumo wrestler who was 6 feet 8 inches tall and weighed at the time over 600 pounds. Yarborough was strong enough to curl 315 pounds 20 times  in a row. In terms of size and strength, Keith Hackney was outmatched, but by the time the fight was over…Keith Hackney emerged victorious. He was nicknamed “The Giant Killer” afterwards.

Now, Keith Hackney’s accomplishment is quite similar to fairy tale and mythological stories involving normal sized men or women facing giants, overcoming them with guile (think “Jack the giant killer”, or Odysseus and the Cyclops in Homer’s “Odyssey”). He did use superior fighting styles and strategies in that fight, thus outsmarting and outfighting the Sumo colossus.

Does this similarity with fairy tale stories like Jack the Giant Killer and myths like Odysseus mean that…Keith Hackney never did defeat Emmanuel Yarborough? Does it mean that his fight with Emmanuel Yarborough is a fiction, based on fairy tale stories and myths of normal sized  people overcoming giants?

Then why would Jesus’ crucifixion be based on Inanna hanging on a hook?

9.  Went to the underworld?

After he died, Jesus descended into Sheol (In the New testament called “Hades), which was pictured as being in the earth (Acts 2:31, Ephesians 6:8-10, see also Matthew 12:40). This was the Hebrew underworld. Afterwards, Jesus rose from the grave. True, Inanna went to her version of the underworld and returned as well…but so did numerous ancient mythological figures (and even monsters) who are never said by Jesus Mythicists to have striking parallels to Christ.

Hades (who shared the same name as the underworld. He was given charge of the underworld by Zeus, his older brother. He nevertheless rose back to the world of the living for a short time, to kidnap Persephone).

Persephone, as stated above, was kidnapped by Hades, who took her to the Underworld. She was eventually allowed to leave , but before she went she was tricked to each the Pomegranate of death. As a result, she can only stay on the earth for two thirds of every year. The other third, she has to go back to the underworld).

There were several others, such as Orpheus, Sisyphus (  (Had told his wife not to bury him or make offerings to him (customary offerings for the dead) if he passed away. When he did die, he told Hades about his lack of burial and offerings and asked permission to go back to earth to make sure that these things were done. Hades let him go…but when he realized that he had been duped, he dragged him back to the Underworld) , Hermes ( Watched over Hercules while he was in the underworld, but left when Hercules did. He also accompanied the spirits of the dead as they made their journey to the underworld. Being the messenger of Zeus, he would have no doubt sent messages to the god Hades.), Theseus (Theseus (went to the Underworld, was imprisoned by Hades, but Hercules freed him and brought him back to earth) and Cerberus, the three headed offspring of the monsters Typhon and Echidna (the latter half woman, half snake). 

The latter lived in Sicily in one version of her myth, the Peloponnese in another. Thus, Cerberus would have been conceived while on earth, only to be taken to the Underworld to keep its spirits within…only for Hercules to bring it out of the underworld and take it to the ancient Greek city of Mycenae.

Not much of a parallel then. 

Keep in mind: Inanna died while in the Underworld; Jesus died before going there.

10. Dead for three days?

No.

After waiting three days, the goddess Ninshubur (aka Nincubura) went to several gods, pleading for help. She visited Enlil first, but he refused. She visited Inanna’s father Sin/Seun/Nanna next, but he also refused. Then she visited Ea aka Enki, who,  despite being angry with Inanna, agreed to help. 

How long did this take? 

How long was Inanna in the Underworld?

We don’t know. The ancient texts do not say.

Indeed, we have to remember that Ninshubur had to wait three days after Inanna descended into the Underworld before seeking aid, not three days after Inanna died (Inanna didn’t know that she was going to be killed). We don’t know how long Inanna’s journey through the Underworld took, or at which point in those three days that she was killed.

11.  Resurrected?

Yes, but not by her own power.

Ea made two sexless beings and sent them to the underworld, to ease the suffering of Ereshkigal, Inanna’s sister and Queen of the Underworld. When Ereshkigal asked them what reward they would like, they asked that they would be allowed to revive Inanna. This was granted, and Inanna resurrected (though some sources use the word “reborn”), and eventually returned to the upper world.

Inanna’s resurrection is more similar to those in the Bible involving mere humans who were resurrected by God, instead of Christ, who is God incarnate and resurrected…himself.

Not much of a parallel, eh?

Folks, the comparisons between Jesus and Inanna are abysmally weak. Indeed, she oddly enough has more in common with Moses than with Christ (Had a set of law tablets, brought plagues on Sumer (Turned all  the well water into blood, then brought floods, and finally sandstorms. She did this because the Shu-kale-tuda, a gardener’s son and Sumerian, raped her while she was asleep), but these similarities don’t mean that Moses was a fictional character based on Inanna (once again, consider the parallels between Alexander the Great, a historical figure, and Achilles, a mythical one. Recall also the similarities between the Novella “Futility/Wreck of the Titan” and the Titanic disaster, which occurred 14 years later, as well as Edgar Allan Poe’s “The Narrative of Arthur Gordon Pym of Nantucket” and the sinking of the Mignonette. Plus, the differences between Moses and Inanna FAR, FAR outweigh their few similarities.

No, Jesus was not based on Inanna, who was a myth.

Jesus…is real.

Sources: 

“Epics of Early Civilization” by Michael Kerrigan, Alan Lothian, Piers Vitebsky, and Jeremy Black (Consultant), 36-41 “The Ultimate Encyclopedia of Mythology” by Arthur Cotterell and Rachel Storm, 288 (See also 30-31, 47, 51, 74-75, 82-83

https://www.ancient.eu/Inanna/ 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fb4KIFtdRPI&feature=emb_title 

“The Penguin Dictionary of Classical Mythology” by Pierre Grimal, 133, 189, 197-99, 434 UFC 3 DVD

https://www.sherdog.com/news/articles/1/Keith-Hackney-Where-Is-He-Now-30163 

https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0352563/ 

https://www.imdb.com/name/nm1156762/?ref_=nmbio_bio_nm 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gVs4930ERGw&feature=emb_title 

https://books.google.com/books?id=5lmrCQAAQBAJ&pg=PT90&dq=Who+is+Inanna%27s+mother?&hl=en&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwiO-uum7ZHlAhUPiqwKHYDgB-4Q6AEwA3oECAYQAg#v=onepage&q=Who%20is%20Inanna's%20mother%3F&f=false 

https://www.exploratorium.edu/ancientobs/chichen/HTML/caracol3.html 

https://www.history.com/topics/ancient-middle-east/sumer 

“The IVP Bible Background Commentary: New Testament” by Craig S. Keener, 313 “In the Footsteps of Jesus” (A National Geographic Book), by Jean-Pierre Isbouts, 263  

https://www.britannica.com/topic/crucifixion-capital-punishment 

https://threadreaderapp.com/thread/1172309229585125376.html?refreshed=yes 

https://sirtravisjacksonoftexas.tumblr.com/post/628113211750776832/do-supposed-parallels-between-the-gospels-and 

“Encyclopedia of Gods” by Michael Jordan, 114-15  

rules: complete the survey and say who tagged you in the beginning. when you’re finished, tag people to do this survey. have fun and enjoy! 

Tagged by @patsmount 

1: are you named after someone? Literally the character from Lewis Carroll novel? Although I doubt my mum ever read the original novel bc she doesn’t read much, but she had the official Disney picture book, with art from the movie, and she was obsessed with it, she brought it anywhere she went. At least that’s what she told me 2: when was the last time you cried? Yesterday for a very delicate + serious reason that maybe it’s best not to report here since this is supposed to be fun to read. Let’s just say I’m trying to come to terms with smth atm. Also yesterday it was a very upsetting day in general bc I’m trying to make friends but people keep blowing me off 3: do you like your handwriting? I love it even though people laugh at it and they’re are not sure wheter they should be amused by it or be slighly condiscending with it, and I’m sure they find it ridiculous (actually it was someone from this site who called it ‘so funky’; hi Zuzana, love you), but yeah I love it, it’s an expression of my artistic personality 4: what is your favourite lunch meat? I’m a vegetarian?? Also I’m not familiar with strange American terminology when it comes to food, why can’t you just eat pasta for lunch like normal people 5: do you have kids? Ahaha 6: if you were another person, would you be friends with you? Probably not lbr 7: do you use sarcasm? I like how Martina answered ‘not as much as I used to’, I never overcame my Daria-wannabe phase and I don’t have any regrets (ok maybe I have a few at times) 8: do you still have your tonsils? Yes 9: would you bungee jump? Lmao no 10: what is your favourite kind of cereal? Ehrm...plain oats, does that count? Or organic muesley with dark vegan chocolate chips or smth. Again, I’m not sure if these things count as ‘cereal’ but I’m a really boring person 11: do you untie your shoes when you take them off? I never though about this before but I guess I generally don’t 12: do you think you’re a strong person? No, I’m weak in all regards 13: what is your favourite ice cream? Black cherry and dark chocolate 14: what is the first thing you notice about people? Mmm... if they give me good/pure people vibes or if the struck me as being completely self-absorbed and selfish + hypocrytical/fake (I’m sorry guys, I’m all for self love if it’s done to empower yourself and others but I still don’t associate those traits I just described with being good people, I’ll understand if you disagree) 16: what is the least favourite physical thing you like about yourself? Actually I was thinking about this question and I realized I like my body??? Wow, this is a really positive thing to find out lol I mean, I still don’t feel very confident when I go out wearing my natural hair down+ glasses + chapped lips, so I guess I don’t love my natural hair, my dark circles, my skin, wearing glasses, and sometimes I’m concerned about my knees/legs because with the passing of the years my knees are getting more and more turned inwardly and my articulations creek like those of an old lady when I get up, but that’s more of an health concern. Uh, and sometimes I wish I was taller. But like, I don’t love all these things, but I’ve come to terms with them, I accept them, I like them. I like my body. (I like my posture less it’s really bad at all times. I slouch A LOT and get into super weird poses lmao). Also why is this question only about negative traits, shut out to my naturally voluminous, long-ass eye-lashes that I love 17: what color pants and shoes are you wearing now? I’m in my underwear 21: favourite smell? Martina stole my answer, lavender, but also I loove the smell of those candles that ALL the brands make for Halloween? You know the candle I’m talking about, you can find almost the same thing in a 99-dollar stollar or at Yankee Candle, it smells of cinnamon and sugar and other spices and vaguely like burning wood?? Also my favourite perfumes tend to be citrus fragances. Also green tea I forgot about green tea omg scratch all of that it’s green tea 22: who was the last person you spoke to on the phone? My dad, same answer as Martina 23: favourite sport to watch? I find watching tennis weirdly relaxing for some reason. Also years ago I used to do (roller) figure skating and at the time I used to watch (ice) figure competions but now I can’t be bothered 24: hair color? Dark brown + reddish 25: eye color? Dark brown 26: do you wear contacts? Yes 27: favourite food to eat? You can’t possibly ask me this question. All the food 29: last movie you watched? 8 femmes 30: what color of shirt are you wearing? I’M IN MY BRA 31: summer or winter? If I have to choose Winter bc Summer is my least favourite season but fuck both of them tbh Spring ftw  32: hugs or kisses? I want to be kissed on my neck rn 33: what book are you currently reading? I’m still reading Ni D’E’ve ni D’Adam by Amélie Nothomb, even though it’s a 100-page long book, bc I’m going through an intese ‘watching Youtube 24/7 and not reading for shit’ phase. Someone save me 34: what do you miss right now? Mmh... nothing? I’m looking forward to the future more than the past at the moment 35: what is on your mouse pad? I use a laptop with a touchpad so 36: what is the last tv program you watched? Holby 37: what is the best sound? My favourite sound used to be smth very specific, you know the ‘thump’ a bottle does when you uncork it? Now I’m guess I’m watching too much asmr; I’m obssesed with tapping. I find myself tapping on things in stores and people stare at me.  38: rolling stones or the beatles? The Beatles but only bc I literally only know 3 RL songs 39: what is the furthest you have ever traveled? England I think, so not very far lol 40: do you have a special talent? I like to think I can write but it’s unclear if I can still do it + if I’ll ever be able to do it English well enough 41: where were you born? Sicily

I tag my most recent followers: @izzyhuett, @kitscaboodle, @fictionally-teddi, @biancagrieve, @lockbearer, @matildaswan, @misskatekane and @tall-maja, because I want to get to know them :D

If anyone read the whole thing thank you omg

Dates with Hippie

9/7 Met him from Hinge. We actually swiped right on each other a couple of years ago from Bumble, but I don’t think he remembers, and I only remember bc I stalked him and was making fun of him with PP abt a white guy loving India. He was really eager in conversations with me and replied hella quickly. He even told me I was cute TWICE, when he had never met me in person. He invited me to the mariachi festival at DTSA. I was thinking mariachi?? Whatever, be a good sport. Parking was a nightmare. Walked around bc he wasn’t replying to my texts, watched the mariachi on my own. Started walking toward Wursthaus and saw him, and thought hey, he’s pretty cool, tall, looks abt the same as his photos or even better. Called him to tell him I was there and asked where he was. I don’t think he took it as srsly as he should have. He wasn’t really talking to me?? And was more invested in the performances and also his cousin came, so he was with us the whole time. It was so weird. We weren’t really talking abt anything except what music we both liked. He also seemed to know everyone in DTSA. He went to fix the sound when the girl’s PA wasn’t working. I was thinking wtf, you’re supposed to be on a date WITH ME, talking TO ME. Here you are leaving me alone and talking to other people. My parking meter was going to expire in 90 mins, and I was thinking abt booking it then. I was over watching the girl at the stage, so he said we should go to the mariachi stage to catch his friends. I wanted a drink and mentioned that too….saying I wanted a Michelada. It was 10 bucks, such a scam!! And I was like can we pleaseeeeee go get a drink, I’M DYING!!!! We went to Vacation bar and got a batshit host who talked too much. We got Mezcal drinks, and he was asking me abt my spirit animal, and I straight up said Joanne the scammer. Then he said no, a literal animal, so I said a sloth lol. Then after I heard their way better answers, I was like have you guys thought abt this in detail? I asked what animal is a savage. And they probed me abt how savage I was. I replied: I am the most savage person you have ever met. I’m withholding it rn bc you guys aren’t ready for who I really am. Randal said trust me, you can’t shock me, just be who you really are. That’s what I want to know abt people, who they really are and upfront so I’m not shocked later on. I was like you have no idea who I am. And I’m savage for a reason, you don’t know what my intentions are. You have to know if I’m actually a good person or not, and you need way more context to get what I’m saying. My savagery isn’t from malice, it’s for fun and bc I’m evil. They also insulted me correct gif pronunciation. He asked me abt Jorja Smith. I said I would reincarnate as her. We shit on the govt a little bit, and I said whatever you feel, I feel it 5x stronger. Idr the rest, we left to go back to the mariachi. He saw more of his friends, he was planning on hanging out with his group of friends then he lost them. We ended up going to The Gypsy Den, so his cousin could pee. I also finally checked my phone to realize my PARKING METER HAD EXPIRED FOR OVER AN HR. I WAS FREAKING OUT. I CAN’T AFFORD A TICKET!!!! I ran back to find out someone had put more money in my meter. YOU FREAKING ANGEL!!!!! THANK YOU SO MUCHH!!!! The car behind me had been ticketed. I am so lucky. Bless up. There are good people in the universe. He asked me do you have rhythm? I was like with what? Dancing? Yes ofc, I’m not a gringo. I came back and we went to an art gallery. Randall asked me what my thoughts were. Me: I don’t like this art/paintings. It’s all dumb and I don’t get it. We went to this other gallery area and he asked me what my thoughts were on this seemingly Japanese and Native American painting. To which I replied, cultural appropriation. I said I would need more context from this artist to see if he/she really understand the history of these people and how their paintings were highlighting anything abt these cultures. We went into another exhibit, and Idk what lead us to this topic, but I said we need more diversity in art, that goes across literature, music, etc. And that there are a lot of good people in the world, but the bad ones are what you remember. I agreed, but my line of thought was more that the bad have so much power. It fucking sucks knowing I can’t do anything abt it. I said I come from a place of a lot of privilege and I want to lift everyone too. Why do the bad people want to suppress and oppress people?? After this, we wanted to go get drinks but his cousin wanted food, so he FINALLY LEFT, SO WE COULD TALK ALONE. We watched this older group of men perform some surfy music, which was not bad at all. I enjoyed it a lot. It was funny bc everyone stood in this whole ass perimeter away from the musicians. Idky they self-segregated, it made me laugh. If nothing else, this is what I’ll take away from Randall’s date with me. We were laughing at this one lady who was dancing in the middle and recording some of the band. I referenced Kris Jenner’s You’re doing amazing, sweetie, and he didn’t get it smh. By now, he had put his arm around me and was lightly touching me. It was a bit past 10 and his cousin and he were talking abt leaving. He said there was a mezcalero close to his apt, and that I could stop by…...if I wanted, so yeah…..He said it so awkwardly, both his cousin and I were like why’d you have to say it like that?? And he replied, bc that’s who I am...that’s me. Then they both stared at me for an answer, and I said stop staring at me, it’s making me uncomfortable. I said I’d come. Parking was horrible. I drank more than I ate yday. I texted him I was there, and he came outside. We walked to the mezcal bar, and the service was shat bc the bartenders were so busy so he asked if I had heard of the Blind Donkey, so we went there instead. Neither of us had been there before, but it was pretty poppin. We got our drinks and I stupidly walked us back out to the entrance thinking it was the upstairs lmao idiot. We sat on a random couch, but it was too loud, so we moved back behind the speakers. They were playing throwback indie bangers, and I was loving. They played Banquet by Bloc Party, and An Honest Mistake by the Bravery. I was like ugh so good, I was sitting dancing, then when Gorillaz DARE came on, I was like okay let’s go dance, and grabbed his hand. He wasn’t a horrible dancer, could use more rhythm, but he was legitimately dancing and having fun, which is what I appreciate! They kept playing really good shit, then he went to dance behind me and sometimes he would wrap his arms around me and hold me which felt nice. And I think his head rested perfectly over my head bc I’m that small. I turned around at one point and kissed him, and he’s not a bad kisser at all. I liked it/him a lot. 8/10. I expect nothing less than his caliber of kissing...Males should not kiss like wet fish or be sloppy. You guys are all old and have had multiple gfs!!! All I have to say for these 90 minutes was that I had a blast, and it was so much fun, and it’ll probably go down as one of my favorite nights of this year. I’m pretty sure we were the only ones dancing at most points of the night, and I DIDN’T EVEN CARE. I am wayyy too tired to process everything, but I had a ton of fun. I mean the latter half of the night will be part of that best night of the year too. Dancing with someone remotely familiar who knows the music is always a fun experience. I asked to leave to get some fresh air, and we hugged outside. He said let’s go take a walk. Not sure what we talked about, but it was nice to be on empty streets walking around. We held hands the entire time. The topic of drugs came up, and I was saying I understand why people take drugs to cope with life bc it’s so fucking hard sometimes, and it’s so overwhelming. It’s hard to deal with it on your own. It’s so hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel sometimes. It feels like a hell hole. He said something along the lines of yeah, I’ve succumbed a few times. I’ve fallen into a depression and went to sleep not wanting to wake up bc there was nothing going for me. Then we got back to his apt area, and we sat on some random steps. Not really sure what we spoke abt here or what his game plan was. He put his arm around me and we chilled. And I kept looking to the left bc I didn’t want to make eye contact to the right O_O He lightly tapped me on my shoulder, so I turned around, then he immediately kissed me (which was so smooth). He’s a great kisser. I liked his rhythm and style. He does the triple lingering kiss at the end which is my favorite thing. He also caresses me full body which is nice too. I’m not that affectionate...so...I’ll work on that. He kissed me all throughout my neck, shoulders, ears. He’s pretty good. At one point, I put my legs over his leg, and it got more intense. He started caressing my legs and going up my thighs. I told myself I wouldn’t get WGW or have sex tonight. Generally, my hand goes immediately to a man’s crotch and I tried to remain as restrained as possible. Then he started going close to my underwear or over it, so I was like yo, 2 can play at this game. And I already knew he had been hard for probably hours, so I grabbed it from outside his pants..and he was wet already. I rubbed his balls, and I could hear him moaning in my ear. He kept putting his hand through my hair to kiss me more intensely, and all I could think was I’M BALD. DON’T DO THIS TO ME. YOU’RE LITERALLY TAKING HAIR OUT!!! My life is already so difficult ); I think earlier he had asked if I was going to drive home or wanted to stay over, and I said I can drive home. He said good bc he lived in a studio and space was limited. Then ¾ into the makeout session, that was TAKING FOREVER with SO MANY PEOPLE PASSING BY AND WATCHING AND SEEING MY CROTCH FLASHED, he whispered, do you really have to go home, can’t you just stay? I didn’t reply. Then this one guy with LLD who made a lot of noise passed by us, so I stopped and looked at him. He laughed….then later he asked can we go to your car and do this in a not so sketchy spot. We are not 17!!!! You are too big for my car anyway. This is fine--there is space here! At points, we would stop kissing and I hugged him tight and rested my head on his shoulder to enjoy the moment, intimacy, and silence. I almost wanted to say this is nice, thanks. Thank god, I didn’t. I also wanted to pull out my phone and soundtrack this scene to Heartbeats by Jose Gonazlez, but that’d be TOO CHEEZY. One time I rested my head on his shoulder and was closing my eyes bc I was so sleepy!!! He’s like are you sleeping??? Bitch I MIGHT BE. I always thought he would finish kissing me after we ended with our lingering kisses, then he’d come back for more. Finally, I said I’m gonna head out bc I’m so tired. He said he’d walk me. We held hands and he walked me back. I said I still have my gum in my mouth, it’s called talent. We kissed AGAIN at the car, then he squeezed me tight and let me go. Told me to drive home safe and light slapped my ass. I was so tired. I still am. How do I feel about all of this? It was a nice and fun night. Did it beat the effortlessness and ease of convo with Liorr? No...But I generally don’t kiss anyone I kind of like/who has potential on the first date. We made out for an entire fucking hour. Holy fuck, NO WATER, NUFFIN. That’s impressive m8. We hung out for about 9 hours. That’s A LONG ASS TIME. I didn’t necessarily feel an intense connection/chemistry, but that’s bc Idk him. There weren’t any red flags for me. Whenever I expressed my opinion, he would validate it and build upon it which is refreshing considering most guys would become defensive and be quick to strike my opinion down. You asked for it, you twats. If you asked me for a perfect date, it would be either be dancing + drinks at a festival/bar, and I got that. I had a fucking blast. Imagine if I actually had a FESTIVAL BAE. WAH ALL I WANT IS TO BE HELD!!! 

9/13 Date #2 

Initial reactions: I felt so safe, seen, understood. It’s so easy. I’m shook. You know how after Tyler and Hannah’s date, Hannah said “I’ve never felt so respected”--that’s how I feel on a smaller scale. I like this d00d bc he has no ego and actually listens to me and replies directly to what I say. We’re so in sync physically, it’s stupid. It’s so easy to talk to him, and the way he holds me--everything. Kill me, I love his kisses; I love the way he smells. He’s way more romantic than me and so affectionate. I am stone cold, and he makes me not want to be that and reciprocate to maybe ⅓ of his level. Who raised him? They did so well! And all his exes did so WELL IN TEACHING HIM HOW TO TREAT A GIRL AND HOW TO KISS. 

I think I like him. That was probably one of my favorite dates ever, if not my favorite date. It was so easy, relaxed, chill, low-key. He said he was leaving for HB early, and wasn’t texting me afterward, so I was kind of hesitant if he actually left or not. I was thinking, “What if I get stood up? Whatever, I can drink at the beach by myself. NBD” He did reply and said he was parked which made me feel relieved. I got out of the car and saw that he was parked and walking toward me. I’ll never get over how tall he is. He surely is taller than 6 ft!!! We walked toward the beach, talked abt our day. I saw that there was a patrol looking car driving along the street we were walking. It was a trash truck, and it was emptying/putting new bags along the walkway. We walked away, and somehow it would always end up behind us. Whatever. We mostly talked about drugs and his experiences with it. I opened a beer too while we talking. He talked abt his preference for psychedelics. He said he did acid while in India with a girl he met up with whom he had hooked up on and off for 3 years back when he was younger. He said the conversation they had while on acid was the reason they were able to maintain a friendship afterwards, otherwise that would’ve been over. Hmmm, cryptic. We finally got to the benches/tables I wanted to sit at, and I said my boots were hurting (which they were). It was pretty wet, but I put down my blanket for us to sit on it. We talked a lot abt his experiences traveling in Sri Lanka/India. I wanted to know more abt Sri Lanka and how he traveled there. He also said India is his favorite country and he wants to return again next year. I asked him what’s the pull for India? Why? He explained to me he liked the duality and chaos, the mix of wealth and poverty, there’s always a lot going on, etc. I said it’s so strange for me to hear someone who loves it so much when my experience was so different and frustrating. I talked abt the instance where we almost got sexually assaulted. He replied: yeah, sorry about that. That’s horrible, I can’t imagine how it is to travel as a girl there. I really appreciated that response. How many guys in the world would be able to apologize, validate me, and empathize? Maybe 3 people. When we sat next to each other, he always rubbed/caressed my back, and they were really good massages tbh!!! When I was telling my India story, he didn’t really do that anymore, sensing the urgency and conflict to come in my story. And Idk when he did this, but we were talking and he ended up resting his head on my shoulder leaning back into me, and it was so cute, I nearly died. I hadn’t been touching him or doing anything. He seemed to feel really comfortable. We talked a lot abt his marketing agency bg, and we talked abt being laid off and what we did after that. I think we were in this weird intertwined position. He hugged me from behind, and he was sitting to my left, but his head was on my right shoulder, so I leaned opp way..and he replied so basically we did the same shit and ran away, diff times. I told him I had the same birthday as Donald Trump and I could relate to him when I was 12 bc I’ve since grown up. When I was 11, I told a kid who stood up on a chair, “be careful not to break the chair!” My teacher, Thompson smh and was like Natalie, you can’t say shit like that. Hippie said he was never in a position to be a bully bc he moved schools when he was in 4th grade from Mississippi to Louisiana. He said he was a hillbilly and spoke with a different accent. I asked him what kind of accent it was, and he kept saying oh man, Idek how to do it anymore. Saying I reckon etcetc, and I laughed bc I hear that only in shows/movies and from British people. He told me I smelled nice. I said, “You do too! I can’t pinpoint the smell tho.” Him: I did shower! He said it’s probably my conditioner. I smelled his hair, and it was def his conditioner. He said when he was working at his agency, he was considered the nerd there bc he played video games and was weird, then he said when he went to work at Blizzard in Irvine, he felt like a jock bc he has interests outside of video games. I can’t even imagine how dweeby everyone is there. He kept saying how tough this year is for him, but he feels like with the changing of the seasons, fall feels like it’s gonna be better (I BETTER BE A PART OF IT). I was starting to get worked up abt my job and complaining, so he said we don’t have to talk abt work anymore and kissed me. We kissed for a long ass time, and he told me, “I really like kissing you.” I replied “I like kissing you, too.” Then he said something like, “I could just sit here and kiss you all night, it’s ridiculous. I especially love your bottom lip. It’s so *insert adjective I can’t recall thick? Juicy? plump?* He kept playfully kissing only my bottom lip, and it was so cute UGH KILL ME. He kissed every inch of my body, legs to arms, head to toe. HE KNOWS HIS WAY AROUND ;_; He kept telling me I was so cute. He asked me if we could go back somewhere, but I said none of us live near here. Funny tidbit: He fingered me (and it was really smooth and FUCKING GOOD. I think our sex would be incredible) then he when he ended, he licked each finger, and he said, “Damn, you taste so fucking good. Weird compliment, but it’s true.” I laughed. I was wearing my high-waisted shorts, and he kept trying to unzip from the front, and I told him the zipper is on the side. He asked why the belt was in the front? “Aesthetics.” He was super hard, but I didn’t want to go thru the trouble of unbuckling his belt and unzipping. He said you know you can undo my pants. So I did...and he asked if I could do it with one hand. And in my head, I was like BRUH PLS LEAVE IT TO THE EXPERT. During this period was when the trash picking up man kept going back and forth behind us making so much noise. I was like srsly??? WE’RE DOING STUFF HELLO. And people were walking at night too. It’s 2am!!! Why wouldn’t you walk during the daytime??? We hugged each other during these moments and laughed. It was a full moon this night, so the beach was so gorgeous and illuminated. When we finished, he said “I should put my dick away.” It was def above average and kind of long??? At the end of everything, when I was folding up the wet blanket, he came from behind and hugged/held me, saying you’re so freaking cute. We stood there and idk what to do but it felt so nice, safe, warm. *cries* He kissed my neck and did the sideways kiss (which I always find super fucking awkward and unromantic), but it was totally sweet and natural with him. I really relished the quiet moments between us. Then we walked back and were talking abt the govt, economics, and corporations. He and I agree on everything so whatever I said, he’d say too. He walked me to my car and we said bye. He held me and kissed me for an extended amt of time. He kept doing the lingering kisses and I couldn’t bring myself to leave. He’s my favorite kisser for sure. I remember thinking “not to be dramatic, but his kisses could bring world peace.”

9/18 Date #3 in Orange

There were so many things that annoyed me before the date. So he said hey I have the apt to myself, come hang out. I thought I was going to Long Beach. I think I worked a 10 hr day, and was like fuck I have to haul ass up to LB now. GREAT. I texted him I was headed out, then he said he was going to an open mic night in Orange. And I was like well wtf, we made plans and you’re just telling me this now? He always tells me things so last minute. I HATE IT. 

Initial thoughts: I don’t think we’re compatible with each other. I don’t think we’re at the same points in our live bc I’ve just come out of my crisis (it’s been a year), and he’s in the thick of his. I don’t think he has enough security in his life to take on another human. And that’s fine--I’m not even needy (ok kind of) but self-sufficient. Not only is he not ready to be in a relationship, but I don’t think we want the same things right now either or have enough common ground. He’s into playing live music and his music collective; he’s spiritual, into yoga and rock climbing. I’m not into that at all. He’s going to a festival for a while, and it’s all spiritual meditation/yoga, which is my fucking nightmare. He never asks anything abt me. It’s mostly me asking questions and getting to know him. Maybe he was having an off day yday. He literally said “I need a place to live 10/1...and ya that’s not going” I’m pretty level-headed abt this, but also I don’t want to be with someone (even if it’s casual) at their best or normal self. I don’t want to be a burden or carry the weight of their burdens. Is that selfish??? I’m realizing this may not be in and taking it in stride. It doesn’t have to be a permanent thing or even something that endures. It could be temporary idk. I’m tempering my feelings for sure. I don’t think I’m the girl for him. I think I’d be a stabilizing force for him and a good ear to bounce ideas off and someone to whom he could vent, but what’s in that for me? I’m learning to be more selfish, not just with my standards, but what I get out of these things. I didn’t have as much fun this time as the last 2, but the bar was so high from the last 2. We can’t always be our best selves, but I’m always my best self when I’m with someone new. Interesting tidbit: He told me the first time he cried was 2012 to Brokeback Mountain. The moment I knew I wasn’t it: He described his dream house/living situation..He said he only wanted to live with musicians and wanted a spare room with a studio to host jam sessions, playing sessions, which is not to say he wants that exclusively and can’t like other things. But I’m so faaaaaaar from that and any other of his passions. I think he’s so invested in music and has tunnel vision with that, that he only wants to be surrounded by other people who want that, too, whereas most normal musicians have non-music friends too. This is me maybe assuming, but I think I’m astute. At the end of the night, we hugged bye and it felt so weird, and I didn’t know what was gonna happen. Bc the entire time, it felt like I was pulling out teeth to keep the conversation going, and he was so aloof and withdrawn. I would cater the convo to topics he liked, and he would give me depressing answers that took me aback. Like when I asked if he snowboarded, he said no, that could hurt my legs. He was so trite. Talked abt his ACL surgery, everything bad that he had experienced….I heard abt it. It was draining for me to listen and keep up a positive attitude and maintain any semblance of levity. At the end, he hugged me, told me to have fun, and have a safe drive out to Vegas. He held me for a bit, so Idk we ended up kissing. It felt empty. He dropped his skateboard and hydro before he kissed me, kind of clunky, kind of funny. I left feeling discouraged and frustrated.