#How am i supposed to go that long | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

abernathyvalois · 1 year

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i made her laugh today she smiled and looked at me and spoke to me I can’t stop thinking about it i’m so fucking stupid Why am i on my knees

#FUCK #After tomorrow i won’t see her until the 17th #THE 17TH #How am i supposed to go that long #Hopefully this interaction will keep me going until then #How am i supposed to go on like this #I’m much too cowardly to tell her how i feel #I barely know her #But honestly #Her presence is enough #Talking to her is enough #I could just talk to her forever and be content #I mean not really #Just sort of #I would always want her on top of me #But like #It’s fine #Wlw #sapphic longing

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poorly-drawn-mdzs · 7 months

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Fishing Interlude

[First] Prev <–-> Next

#poorly drawn mdzs #mdzs #wei wuxian #lan sizhui #lan jingyi #ONE HUNDERED (+6 bonus) COMICS BABY!!!! WE MADE IT!#There's still at least 200 more to go at the rate I'm going but still! Triple digits for a comic project feels worth celebrating.#I'm no stranger to setting myself on projects but this is certainly the most adventurous and long-term one I've undertaken.#The aim was to be done by the end of September (whoops (I also took a few breaks to post other stuff)) But I'm still having fun!#Thank you all so much for joining me on this journey! I have a celebration announcement tomorrow!#Sorry this one doesn't really feel like a 'comic 100'. It's sandwiched between two comics that were supposed to be 'comic 100'...#I love how excited Jingyi is to be in the garden. And I will never miss an opportunity to have them fish.#Slowly...I am setting up my punchline with all this. I promise it's leading somewhere.#Lan Sizhui didn't fit into the frame for panel 3 so I like to think he dove in after a fish #Afterall that's were lan zhan is in this comic. Under the water. Hunting. LSZ is just following what his mentor taught him.#Sorry I broke Jingyi's characterization for this punchline. He's one of the biggest wangxian shippers in canon. But fishing comes first.

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hedgehog-moss · 1 year

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Just some animal friends hanging out on a balmy May afternoon :)

#crawling along #(am counting myself among the animal friends)#and no of course not pampe hasn't spent the past two weeks in the other part of her pasture like she was supposed to #i Will make that follow-up post to let you know who won the poll but it's going to be a long one as she escaped in like 7 different ways #sometimes 2 different ways at once? an investigation is still underway as to how she got out last time #and i WILL reinforce the fence and put her back. where i want her to be #for the eighth time. don't think i won't

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the-witchhunter · 9 months

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DP x DC 50's High School AU... Or is it?

Just imagine if you will, a very aesthetic 1950's high school setting. The Waynes live in the idyllic little town of Amity Park, going to Casper High, and living their lives.

Dick is the oldest son, off to college but still stopping by to visit, all letterman jacket and smiles. Jason, the bad boy greaser is trying to finish up his senior year of high school, a little late, but spending time in Juvie put his life on hold. He's trying his best, spending time working on his motorcycle and hanging with his study buddy, Jazz Fenton. Tim enjoying high school life with his family, studying hard and enjoying photography club. Gee, Tim's life sure is perfect

or is it?

Tim can't shake the feeling that something is wrong. Sometimes, he remembers something else. He has memories of his life here, and they must be real, his family is here, Jason, Bruce, Alfred, and even Dick when he's back from the Teen Titans college. Wait... Dick wasn't in college, was he? Wasn't he a cop in Blood Haven? Was he the local cop? That's right, Dick is the local cop, all sunshine and feeding his eternal sweet tooth with donuts. How could he forget that? He loved his family! Sure, there had been some rough spots, like when Jason died went to juvie, but they were together now, a real family.

But sometimes Tim has dreams, of another time, of another place. But they can't be true, can they? YES! No, That made no sense. Thinking about it made his head hurt.

Then there was the matter of the boy in his class, Danny Fenton. He kept catching him staring. Danny would just look at him funny. Sometimes he would say weird things. Tim would write him off as just an oddball, but sometimes what he said reminded him of his dreams.

Tim wasn't sure what it was, but something was up. He was going to find out what it was, and maybe, just maybe, Danny Fenton was the first step to solving this mystery

or

Tim wished for a more idyllic life and to get along with his brothers while on a mission in Amity Park. One reality warping genie ghost later and now they're stuck in something like a 1950's sitcom with altered memories.

#dp x dc #dp x dc crossover #dp x dc prompt #dpxdc #50's high school au #kind of #set it after jason made his return #but before damian because the ages work #literally everone besides Tim has aged since Damien has shown up #and this would make Jason at least still a teenager #so him being friends with jazz who is probably just 18 is a whole less creepy #Even I am unclear how much Danny actually knows #I suppose if you want to speedrun things he just remembers everything #but imagine them having to work together and try and figure things out #Going through Wayne manor's attic and finding some of Tim's photographs #His real photographs #mixed in amongst the fakes #and then them having to convince the rest of the bats one by one that something is wrong #but first everyone assumes Tim is feeling ill and probably has gone without sleep long enough to start hallucinating again

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nuppu-nuppu · 11 months

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Ignore if you don’t want to read about me being stupid once again

#pls dont read if you cant handle venting and whining #once again i am here to say that i am the loneliest person alive and i feel like i can’t grasp the basic consept of friendship and do it lol #like idk how to be friends #i feel like i will forever be sad and lonely #and i know everyone will say you can talk to me and i know that but i’ve just been by myself for so long that i don’t remember how to have #actual conversations with people i feel like i am disconnected from reality #i feel like i am an extremely unlikeable person and that’s why i was all alone in highschool and idk i am oversharing on the internet again #because it’s the only place i kind of feel safe doing it #pls take care of yourselves first before comfoting me or anything im sorry i sound very pathetic #how do i start living again #how does one live anyway #im just in my head all the time #this was supposed to be hot girl summer but it’s once again summertime sadness #im so stupid!!!#im so anxious and depressed that i dont know what to do with myself #im so sorry for oversharing i have a therapist dont worry im kind of taking care of myself #but the eternal loneliness just wont let me go #idk how to be a person anymore #i’m just sad #thinking of going to a church and pretend to be a believer so i could have a community again lol

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autisticlee · 11 months

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is it an autistic experience to ALWAYS be the one in a friend group who gets left out, alienated, secretly disliked, then kicked out of the group?

#autistic #autism #actually autistic #autism things #asking autistics #i want/need a friend group but it ALWAYS GOES BAD!!!!!!!! AND ITS SOMEHOW ALWAYS MY FAULT?! idk what im doing wrong. people suck.#but i need people and i hate that about me. why cant i split myself in half a few times #or learn how to do group activities alone....like playing tennis. going to the amusement park ive wanred to go to since i was a kid.#drive alone on long trips where i will fall asleep but talk to myself so i dont or something. walk on the park trails alone where people #get kidnapped and stuff when alone. go to a convention and cosplay a group of characters alone. one for each finger....#if you cant tell im being sarcastic. and doing a bad job. sighs. i hate that i have to do everything i need/want a group for alone because #i cant make friends or make groups keep me in them. assuming because im autistic and they hate me 🙃#eother that or im a piece of shit and dont realize it!!!!! how am i supposed to know when no one tells me!!!! 😭😭😭😭#so is it actually me and my fault or is it because im autistic and people just do this to us for some reason #autism stuff

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ivyinne · 19 days

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most of the fanart I've seen of jean loves to make him soft or sad-looking (and i adore it!) but i gotta be honest guys, in my head jean is perpetually wearing this expression:

ಠ_ಠ

#jean moreau #aftg #all for the game #tfc #the foxhole court #tsc #the sunshine court #i mean if his introduction to us is going to be him turning to kevin and going “what the hell is this?” post neil's riko roast moment #what else am I supposed to imagine him looking like?#not to mention iconic insults such as “you hard-of-hearing imbecile”#“you ignorant child”#and my favourite #“how either of you have lived this long when you're so miserably stupid is beyond my capacity to understand”

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doodleodds · 2 years

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royalty & fairy tale au’s are meant to be mixed and u can’t change my mind

Late shuake week 2022 day 3 - Royalty AU

#shuakeweek2022 #akechi goro #kurusu akira #I JUST REALLY LOVE SLEEPING BEAUTY OK #or well. i love the idea of 'sleeping curses.' idk why! they've always fascinated me #i used to be obsessed with aurora and snow white for that reason #and so here i am! as always! projecting this interest of mine onto my favorite characters :)#also for reference because i just realized how weird it reads: goro's gonna be in the tallest tower when he's cursed #that's why akira's got a reason to climb it. so. yeah #also in case you were wondering why i said 'see you tomorrow with more art' and then proceeded not to post for.....four days:#1) work decided that i'm going to be doing more hours so i now have very little free time;#2) i decided to actually try my hand at coloring again like an IDIOT and now here we are. sigh. coloring is hard #i was trying to hard not to just overdose on comic dots again lol & it resulted in this nonsense. me and my one very textured stone wall #ANYWAY lmao even though i missed like. every single day of akeshu week so far i'm still gonna be doing the prompts #just at my own pace! so. hopefully expect more art. soon. ish. hopefully not with another uhhh 2 month gap like last year lol #also quick fun fact since you made it this far in my tags! that second page originally wasn't supposed to be there!#i drew sleeping goro just cause i could and i was just gonna stick him under a read more but then i got attached lmao #and now he's in the main post! :D yayyyyyy goro #ANYWAY that was super long. thanks for reading & i hope u have a lovely day!!!!

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oatbugs · 4 months

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Jack Marsh (2005), Friendship Otherwise - Toward a Levinasian Description of Personal Friendship

#saw carnation lily lily rose by john singer seargent irl today. it was basically at my doorstep all along idk why i never went to see it #it was placed at a corner in the gallery. me and my friend sat down and sketched the paintings of beautiful naked people quite badly. paper #provided by tate britain. she told me about how she couldnt look her boyfriend in the face after a harrowing film about war. when i say the #interview was informal i mean the person who was supposed to be my boss told me let me get you a cider and then he said after #50 years of life he knows people are inherently good and it only takes a little bit of kindness to save this world. he said he tricked #his wife into keeping the baby and then he said he quit his job at a US bank to help people find meaning and in it #he would have liked to find meaning. instead he started climbing with his friends. he said he chews his cigarettes because its a habit from #when he had to hide things from people. the entire time i felt uncomfortable and incredibly enlightened. this is my friends mentor. she has #his pattern of pauses and expletive and penchant for ends-justify-means attitude. i do think im not very clever #but maybe one day i will love you enough to make up for it. i wrote code i dont understand staring at the final error i thought about how #we both thought of how when we're too old to remember the voices of our friends we would like to stand in the pathway of the LHC beam pipe #cut it open and eat light in the freezing cold vacuum (kills you long before radiation will) the invisible puncture wound unfolding dna #back to the start larger than you ever were. you go to heaven once youve been to hell. my friend is in my bed #practicing calculations of eigenvectors by hand and she is uninterested in a visual proof you are uninterested in incompetence #we catch a train this is your kind of burden you tragic hero wincing at that word you only do this because you have to. im the only one #who can. i am a coward in this for the fucking poetry. the visual proofs. the pretty numbers. an architect who was horrible at maths wanted #to be a philosopher and accidentally ended up neck in deep in 70th Error On Visual Studio Code i want to kiss your eyes before we say #goodbye we both know there is no love in the way there should be. I still have your dress in my wardrobe. i hope you make art.#you think im alright head-wise i think you fucking hate me i think ill never be so clever you want me to tell you my idea?#if you wanted more of this world i would have liked to kiss you harder. we cant both be like this. im sorry i cant be with you the whole wa #the love is gone if you have to ask it. his breath catches his eyes feel stiff it is -1.9 kelvin he is near the beam pipe i miss holding #his hand i miss her singing voice i miss his hair and i found the antonym of pain thank you for carrying me home.

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amazingspider-z · 5 months

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some more ghost rider sketches, version i guess i wanted to draw some bones,

including a partial prototype of whatever the hell the Rider has going on underneath his skin-suit (which might need more leather 'muscles' but. whatever), a theoretical endpoint of how dead Robbie could get in my verse, which. unlikely? extremely. but fun to draw, and a line-up of Robbie, Lisa, and Gabe

in theory, Lisa's sense of style was inspired by @wazzappp 's post of Claire's fashion Lisa, but, well, outfit design eludes me. so. brightly colored vague y2k vibes are. the best i got

#robbie reyes #gabe reyes #lisa (ghost rider)#all new ghost rider #revenant robbie au #i am fully just drawing whatever at this point but. its fun so idk #ANYWAY i read the avengers 2018 run and. ok it was bad #both generally and also. sob they hit robbie with the generic mcu-quippification and naive teenager beam 😔#absolutely no escape #but challenge of the ghost rider kind of hit tbh #if only bc it had robbie racing blaze for Gabe's sake and well.#ok objectively idk how his parents got pulled to hell like.#were they supposed to be there?#did johnny drag them from another afterlife?#idk at all #but *man* ok im not immune to family/loved ones finding out about a fave being a 'monster'#and accepting him anyway ok #so long story short idk if im gonna go with an exorcised-eli yet or not #but i gave robbie a rosary (not accurate. yes i know i didnt get the spacing on the top part right) on account that #religious iconography in marvel works based on a personal faith #re that one panel of kitty pryde burning dracula with a star of david #so i figure there's a high chance that robbie was raised roman catholic when his parents were around #even if that was a long time ago #and even if he doesnt believe/is religious in the strictest sense #he still has associations yk?#(<to be clear speaking as another mexican american and the impacts of religion in the culture as a kind of atheist)#anyway my point is #in a non-exorcism version hes found that wearing a rosary. even if it doesnt shut eli up entirely #makes him more? bearable? less loud/oppressive? easier to push down #while in an exorcism version ig it helps with keeping his identity as robbie centered and dealing with supernatural emotional regulation

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torahtot · 5 months

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ok ive had enough of queering judaism. can we start judaizing queerness now. or something

#like. it feels like so much of this queering judaism shtus just layers an american/secular queer identity over judaism #which i guess is fine for certain communities. but it's only going to push you away from orthodoxy #and if as queer jews we already feel like our queerness makes us into secularized outsiders in our own communities #how does this help? is trying to get our communities to embrace an essentially secular american iteration of queer identity supposed to mak #us feel LESS like outsiders? it's not quite doing it for me #we need a queerness that comes from within judaism that is essentially jewish #ive seen a couple of articles recently from ppl talking abt how word/concept of butch doesnt exist in their language & culture #but they use it anyway #& like. i love being butch. it's important to me ill never give it up #& i am american too. but my whole identity as a butch he/him lesbian is exclusively secular american it came from the outsifr #which is definitely due in large part to the fact that my Gender Problems were really tied up w orthodox jewish gender roles #so naturally to get out of that i'd pull on something not jewish. but i wish there was another option? idk if that's possible #or how it would look #maybe that's why im obsessed w the idea of a butch w long curly payos.... 😦#i forgot where i was going w this but yeah it's frustrating #this is a large part of why im wary of starting a queer Jewish club on campus bc the people who would wanna start it w mr #well no offense but they are insufferable about this #(incidentally they're also insufferable about chanukah. no surprises there)#nachi speaks #jew blogging #others have Actually written abt all this tho

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graceful-not · 3 months

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No actually all of you need to sit your asses down bc I just watched the legacy shorts and. HOW HAVE I NEVER HEARD ANYONE SAY ANYTHING ABT THEM OTHER THAN GOLDEN HOUR AND SWEATING TO THE GOLDIES???? HOW HAS NO INE SAID A SINGLE THING ABOUT THE GOLDEN LEGEND SHORT?? OR THE ANIMATION STYLE OF GOLD RUSH???? I could have gone my whole life without watching those do you understand that. Why are we, as a fandom, not taking about these more, or like, AT ALL. we should be insane about this. We should be insane about this, right??? RIGHT??????

#ninjago #ninjago shorts #ninjago legacy shorts #ninjago golden legend #golden legend #legacy shorts #ninjago gold rush #*heartbroken gf voice* ninjago fandom... i feel like i dont even know u anymore.... u never tell me anything.... whats wrong babe...#i know it aired durinh seabound (i think?) but come ON guys its been so long why is no one capitalizing on this #windows into everything Ninjago could have been but wasnt. im literally a changed man now do u get it im never gonna be normal again #how am i supposed to just sleep after this #seriously though why did they go so hard. genuinely. why would they do this to me #why would they create something so good that im devastated by its impossibility of ever coming to fruition

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i-know-you-wanna-kiss-me · 3 months

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i'm like if a really gifted person was extremely lazy and uninspired

#i try and find projects here but none of them compell me #how am i supposed to put my soul into something that isn't touching?#and i don't want to go abroad for long periods of time

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libraryleopard · 3 months

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Further volumes in the horror comic series about a secret society that hunts monsters who feed on fear, especially children's fear

Flashbacks to the origin story of monster hunter, Erica Slaughter, in volume four

#the flashbacks called me pain. erica and aaron were very little…#something is killing the children #comics #lulu reads comics #lulu reads something is killing the children #i'm not really sure how long this series is supposed to run #seems to still be going so i'm not sure if there's a specific planned run #2023 reads #lulu speaks #lulu reads #would you believe i read these in september i am so bad at doing these little reviews

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definitelynotnia · 1 month

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im sorry i have to rant im so fucking pissed

my exams end on 19th and I have to get rid of some books and buy some books which are quite pricy online so I had planned on going to college street on 20th and selling my books and buying the new ones at a cheap price and i was frankly really excited about it because all I get is a one day break to relax bcz i have to start studying for entrances from 21st so all I have is 20th and i wanted to spend it at college street and then get some food and basically have like a solo date kind of thing.

and i was so so excited about it i told my boyfriend about it like 500 times bcz i kept forgetting i've already mentioned it and it was literally on my mind a lott so i kept bringing it up and ik it seems like not a big deal cz i can just sit at home and chill too but i literally do not get to go outside my house. like- the last time i went out was new years eve and after that the only time i've gone out is to school or to give my boards that is it. my mother has some weird like problem wiht me going out like even if i tell her that i just want to go to our terrace for 5 minutes just to get some fresh air she won't even allow that she'll be all suspicious and like sTaNd In ThE bAlCOnY aNd TaKe FrEsH aIr like she herself doesnt leave the house (and blames it on me and my brother ???? when have we ever stopped you bro, she said I HaVe To Be HeRe To KeEp An EyE like im 18 i dont need to be watched 24/7 stop blaming me for choices you put upon yourself) and i just feel so suffocated ALL THE TIME i feel so overstimulated and im so sick of rotting on my bed and i dont want to wait for some birthday party or friends meet up to be able to leave my goddamn house i just wanted to go and have a fun day and get me some books thats it.

anyway so initially the plan was that my mom would go along but something came up so she wanted to postpone it to 21st and i didn't want to bcz i'd already be missing 3 days bcz of my boyfriends birthday, holi and my brothers birthday (all of which are important and i dont want to miss which makes me the villain apparently bcz i should "adjust" and cancel my "parties" instead of trying to stick to my plan bcz that makes me too demanding and selfish apparently) so i suggested that ukw why dont u go do ur thing which came up and i'll go to college street by myself...which is when the solo date idea came which i had really wanted all along but didnt bring up bcz i knew she'd say no but now there's a valid reason for me to go alone so like, its a pretty easy fix i can just go alone but noooo. First of all,

I've been to college street multiple times before so its not like its an unknown area to me

im going by metro which is quite safe

im going when there is stark daylight and i will return home much much before it gets dark and im literally 18

she never lets me go anywhere alone, not even take ubers alone if i want to get back from somewhere my bf has to come drop me everytime and then go backwards to his house which is so so so stupid and i never get to go out alone unless accompanied by family or by a male friend, so obv when i said i'll go to college street alone she refused to let that happen and started screaming about how 'if its so important to go on 20th bcz u dont want to miss a day of studying then cancel ur 'parties' and study then' and i was like no its not about missing a day its just that there's a very easy and logical fix to this problem which is i go alone and its not inconveniencing anyone so why cant i just do that but she will not listen to that bcz im 'adamant' and 'everything has to be according to me' bcz i found a viable solution to the problem. so instead of letting me just go she was literally ready to pay much more money and buy the books online, like.....why cant i just go bro??? (and she keeps telling me im a waste of her money bcz i will amount to nothing in life and my education was a failed investment or wtv so like now why are u wasting more money??? im literally trying to save the money that u 'waste' on me so just let me ???)

anyway i called my dad last night and told him and he was super ok with the idea he said its a good idea that i go alone and that he would speak to her but then today when i asked her if dad spoke to her she said yes, we'll go on 20th and i was like .....we? so apparently she CANCELLED her previously immovable thing for which she wanted me to cancel my 'parties', she cancelled that and agreed to go with me on 20th just so that i dont get to go alone- like ???????????????? what is ur problemmmm

so obv i was super annoyed and i went on a whole ass rant about how i literally struggle to even cross roads bcz i dont know shit about basic travelling bcz all my life ive been in a car and its a running joke with all my guy friends that i 'cannot navigate' and 'dont know any places' and obv??? if im never allowed to go anywhere then how tf will i know the places- the only places i know is bcz recently i've been paying a lot of attention and asking my dad stuff about what roads to take to reach certain places and when i go out with my friends i kind of try and learn a bit but thats it i've only ever gone alone completely alone to two places which is my beauty parlour thats 5 minutes away from my house and one bazaar one time that was 2 bus stops away, thats it. thats my extent of public travelling alone. and now im supposed to go to a whole new STATE for college and i cant even call myself an auto without struggling. and like- is this not a basic life skill??? like ok yeah its not rocket science and i will probably figure it out even if i start later in life but why not now? most of my guy friends literally go everywhere alone, why not me? and my dad agreed with all of this but my mom was just like "you'll be in the hostel only, no need to go out of the campus" like ARE YOU FOR REAL????????? and she's like "if u want to learn skills learn how to cook" like ok yes i will also learn how to cook for sure but i wont have a fucking kitchen in the hostel but somehow cooking is an urgent skill i should learn but going places by myself is unimportant bcz i should just never? leave? the? hostel?

anyway after much screaming and shouting my dad gave up and just cut the call bcz he doesnt want to get into an argument with my mother and my mother was being all suspicious like why do u hAvE tO gO aLoNe AlL oF a SuDdEn even though i literally explained why i want to do this alone but she doesnt think thats valid. so she refuses to let me go and i asked her for one reason why i shouldnt cz usuallt its always "no u have exam what if smthn happens" but now i literally dont even have exam so whats ur excuse now? streets will always be unsafe forever so "what if smthn happens" is not a reason to never let me go out without a man so just gimme one reason and she couldnt give me a single reason she just said "i said no, thats it".

and now she's gone off about how im useless and blah blah and "high maintainance" bcz i want books and "everyone else (some pishi's son) just studies online" and so the whole option of college street is apparently now cancelled and she's trying to set up a whole ass kindle account (half the books i need arent even available as ebooks) just because i wanted to go by myself.