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k-hotchoisan · 6 months

Note

Hello hello!!! I literally haven’t sent an ask in forever but your writing IS SOOOO GOOD 😮‍💨🤌🏾🤎🤎🤎🤎

Can I request 18. Or 22.👀👀😂

I mayhaps am a Mingi Stan lmfaoooo!

Congrats on getting 500 followers!!🫶🏾

22. Missionary with Seonghwa or Doggy with Mingi?

BACK TO BACK MINGI LETS FUCKIN GOOOOO thank you for ur well wishes and compliments baby 🩷 hehe enjoy mingi!

Warnings: smut, pwp, size training @ the beginning, backshots, unprotected sex, it’s mingi and his fat dick, cream pies, orgasms

Taglist: @bro-atz @diamond-3 @mcarebearsstuff @choisansplushie (message me to be in taglist!)

K’s 500 this or that Masterlist here!

When Mingi told you his cock was big, you totally did not believe him until you actually saw his cock. It was once when you sneaked into your shared bathroom with him because you left your phone at the edge of the sink. You slowly pushed the door open and the folding door bends, but Mingi is too busy rapping while letting the hot water run down his back, the steam fogging up the shower partition. You, at the perfect fucking timing, turn your head to your partner who was absolutely oblivious, and your eyes went straight to his cock. Even in the fogged up glass, you could still make out his shape—he’s definitely a grower from the looks of it. Before you realise what the fuck you were even doing, you manage to snap out of it in time before slipping out of the bathroom successfully.

And that’s how you ended up in the predicament of letting Mingi slowly inch into you and keeping his cock in your pussy as you adjust to it over the course of a little over a week. Mingi doesn’t know how he’s able to control himself because every time he enters his cockhead into you, he just wants to spilt you open so fucking badly, but he recognises that your comfort comes first, so he pushes his feral thoughts aside, often biting his cheek when he enters you from below, distracting himself by drawing circles on your thigh while he snuggled against the nape of your neck when the both of you cuddle.

He often whispers praises when you’re able to fit in another inch or two, sometimes teasing you before you slap his chest from behind but he wants to make sure you grow accustomed to his size.

He knows it’ll be worth every minute.

And he’s rewarded when on the ninth day, his cock sinks into you fully and his mind completely turns into mush the moment he’s buried into you to the hilt. He hears your whimpers and gasps as you clench around him once more and he kisses the nape of your neck while rubbing your thighs.

“Shit, that feels so good. You did so well for me, princess”, he groans, fighting the urge to start pounding into you, so he opts to squeeze your thighs instead. “How are you feeling?”

“Full. So full, babe”, you whine, wanting to contract the muscles on your abdomen from the pleasure, your palm pressing against the bulge pushing against your womb.

He gives you time to adjust once more, groaning from time to time when he feels you squeeze around him.

“You can start moving, Min”, you mutter, pressing your face into the pillow, your eyes fluttered shut as your grip on his arm around your waist tightens. He pulls out and you squeeze his arm, your thighs trembling from how fucking good he feels as his cock just drags against your cunt.

And he slowly starts fucking you, filling you right up, his cockhead always pressing against your cervix, while he listens to you slowly unravel through squeezes and moans. Mingi makes the mistake of looking down, and he swallows hard when he sees the way you’re creaming so fucking much on his cock.

“You’re gonna drive me insane babe”, he says, tightening his grip around you as he picks up the pace, stroking your thighs as he lifts it up so he enters you at a much deeper angle, one that makes fireworks explode beneath your eyelids. “Mingi…! Fuck! Oh god, you’re so big,”you sob, feeling your mind slowly break from the pleasure. The pressure has practically subsided, and now it’s just pleasure after pleasure whenever he fucks into you. Fuck, you’re gonna get disgustingly addicted to this. It doesn’t help your case that his moans are deep and it vibrates in your ears, you feel your cunt spit more slick—all the more it being easier for him to slide his cock in and out of you now, feeling his balls slap against your skin with every thrust.

Mingi hisses as he pulls out of you, before he shifts himself to go behind you, and you shift automatically with him, your ass perched up in the air while his hands are on your hips.

He pushes his cock in slowly and swallows hard when his cock glides into your sopping cunt so fucking easily. He almost loses his fucking mind.

“Look at you, princess. So well adjusted to my cock that it slides in so easily now”, Mingi hums, giving your ass a soft squeeze that draws a squeal from you, before he doesn’t give you a warning to start pounding into you once more. Your eyes are rolled back, your fingers holding onto the sheets for dear life as he abuses your cervix from this fucking insane position. You’re practically bouncing off his cock and the new angle completely breaking your mind, with only broken moans and cries leaving you every time he thrusts into you.

And Mingi fucking loves it.

The knot in your tummy tightens and drool is seeping past the corner of your lips as you can’t even find the energy to tell him properly that you’re about to cum.

“Cumming-“ you barely finish your sentence before your orgasm hits you, white spots filling your vision the pleasure shoots into your brain and cunt, squeezing the fuck out of Mingi’s cock. Your mind is somewhere else at this point, the only constant feeling is Mingi’s cock just shoved into you so fucking good.

“A-ah, fuck! Oh princess, you’re squeezing me so much-“ Mingi grunts his cock twitching so damn much as his thrusts become erratic. A long, drawn moan Mingi releases before he jerks into your cunt, warm cum filling you up as he doesn’t want to let go of your hips. His body tenses for a few more seconds, and he catches his breath before he slowly pulls out, watching the way the mixture of his load and yours drip out of your abused and fluttering hole, and drizzle downwards.

He releases his grip on your hips and your lower body slides down onto the bed. Mingi’s arm snakes around your waist as he pulls you close, his other hand brushing your hair back from your face as he presses a kiss on your forehead before you let yourself be taken by sleep.

#k’s500thisorthat🌶️#ateez #ateez scenarios #ateez x reader #ateez fanfic #ateez imagines #ateez smut #smut #ateez fic #kpop smut #mingi #song mingi #mingi ateez #ateez mingi #mingi smut #song mingi smut #mingi x reader

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leah-lover · 2 months

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Closed for maintenance . Leah Williamson × reader

Reader embarks on a new journey with a new club. Part 1.

My day started out like any other in the past 4 weeks. The beeping sound of my alarm wakes me up, I dread the thought of getting up even though I still do, I get my shit together, I leave for training, come back a few hours later and go to bed early.

My days have been blending in ever since that heart shattering break up. However, today had a little twist to it. As I was leaving the gym to go to the physioroom I got called into the Manager's office. Upon getting in, the coach said “hey, so I called you here to let you know that we are going to transfer you. You have been an absolute killer for our team. You will always have a place between us. The thing is your dynamic with the team has been off which has been causing some tension. And the best thing I thought to do was to transfer you this January.” Shock couldn't describe the state I was in. Running on autopilot, I got out of the coach's office, got my things and departed home without talking to anybody, which has been my pattern this past month.

My head was in the clouds for the entire drive, and when I got home I threw myself on the coach and started sobbing. About 20 minutes later I called my best friend the only person I trusted more than anything.

“Hey are you okay? The girls are worried about you, tell me what is going on please”said kristie with a worried tone

“Well tell Sam and the team not to worry anymore. Emma has decided to ruin my life and get rid of me. I won't be at Chelsea anymore. I am basically fired.” I replied, now more angry than sad.

“What the hell are you talking about? Are you transferred where? when? How ? Are you okay? Did you tell her?.” She asked.

“I think it will be announced tomorrow at the meeting. I don't know anything kristie Chelsea is home. Niamh is home. I can't live without them.” I replied, memories of Niamh and I fludding my brain.

“Sure you will. I love you bubs no matter where you go.” She said, “Me too buddy, me too.” I added, sadness creeping into my heart again.

—-------—---—------------------------------------

It has been an eventful week. It was announced that I would leave Chelsea for Arsenal. The topic has been the talk of the town. From newspapers, Instagram pages, fans on Twitter, Arsenal fans were excited to have me. However, Chelsea fans were bitter I was let go. Most of the mean comments were directed at Emma and Chelsea which I thought was fair. I was the leading goal scorer in the WSL and we were on a great track record to win the league again.

I got a new apartment, and a new car. I tried to begin again. A clear slate and a focus on winning with my new team, the gunners.

Today was the first day of practice. The girls are really nice. This team, this family, seem really gelled together and they seem to start getting me out of my dark hole.

“Hello you.” Said Beth, “I hope you are well and I well we want to let you know you are very welcome and we hope you have a great time with us here.” she added. “Me too “ I responded.

__________________________________

It has been over 2 months since that last interaction with Beth, who I can call my best friend now. Her, Steph ,Katie and I have been inseparable. Arsenal have been on a winning streak since I got here. I seem to enjoy the way they play and interact with each other.

The player I enjoy hanging out with the most is my second Captain, which I can never fully admit.

Leah has been fun, heart warming, safe and a friend and a good one. I can't let whatever is happening affect my career again. I dated a teammate before it ruined my career, or so I thought.

“Ladies, how are we feeling about a party? We won again thanks to wonderful strickers. Let's have a party, we deserve it.” Said Katie on the bus. Shortly after a plan was made.

We went to a bar, we drank, sang, danced, and it was that time of the night where I got hungry for warmth. Human connection however unmeaningful. So I kissed the first girl I fancied.

That's when I felt a hand separate me from the girl and drag me outside.

“You are drunk, let's go home before you do anything you will regret.” Said Leah with an angry tone. “ Let go of me, I am lonely. I need this, please let go.” I pleaded with the alcohol affecting my judgment.

“ You are a fool if you think I would let you put yourself in danger. You are important to me, you should know that. Now let's go.” She ordered.

“ I am not going anywhere with you, you are not my girlfriend.” I protested.

That's when she pulled me in for a small kiss. That felt reassuring but not abusive of my drunk state.

“ You are not kissing anyone or going anywhere tonight. Home it is. Now stop complaining and get in please.” She said with a pour on her face. I did as she said, my mind still on the feeling of her lips.

This is going to be a lot to unpack in the morning.

#alessia russo #espwnt #magdalena eriksson #mary earps #mapi leon #niamh charles #woso #ona batlle #woso fanfics #woso imagine #aresenal #leah williamson #woso community #woso x reader #arsenal wfc

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theminecraftbee · 5 months

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hello i am FASCINATED by how well you write absolutely everyone in mcyt and so i must ask directly: do you. like. have a big document with all your notes on them and their speech patterns and traits and personalities and stuff. or does it just Come natural. is it some secret third thing

if its the first thing: would you be so inclined to perhaps share those notes with the world... for the people... for society... for the greater good of all man... Maybe...

if its the second thing: i violently applaud you through sobs. what the hell. How. wish that were me

if its some secret third thing: i still kindly ask for you to share some thoughts on characterization, or tips and things for it because. the posts you've made like that in the past have very quickly become biblical to me. i'd love some big master post about every hermit's and/or life-series-er's speech patterns or something since you just... write them so well all the time without fail. its phenomenal.

no big document! and I probably won’t write a masterpost, either—I actually tend to not be great at articulating how I write my characterization. my specialization went into “writing fic” more than “writing meta” and while I’m getting BETTER at the latter, I’m still not always good at articulating exactly the things that people probably look for when they look for someone to give them characterization tips.

I’d almost say two is the right option here, but that’s not really fair either—while “it came to me in a vision” is the response I have to a lot of people asking “how did you write that thing”, I should note that I have ALSO been writing for over a decade now and watch a lot of mcyt! so between the practice and watching a good amount of the source material to get everyone’s voices into my head, it’s not really “it came natural fully formed” so much as “it feels natural to me because I’ve practiced a lot”, you know?

if you want shortcuts to realistic dialogue, look for what kinds of words the person you’re writing tends to repeat, use, not use. also, don’t discount osmosis from other people in the fandom; some of my characterization is definitely made up of me having practice synthesizing the thoughts I get looking at other people’s stuff. shortcuts to characterization in general are… harder… but remember that people are Weird when they feel emotions, but they’re still PEOPLE, and aim for that, and you’ll start to get stuff. but the thing is that most of this is just… a lot of practice.

and like, that’s a large part of what it comes down to—watch the guys you want to write so you can hear their voices in your head more easily, and then practice. and then over time you’ll find the shortcuts and style that work for you and how to use those to characterize things! heck, you may even get to the point you start to have Strong Opinions, which is always fun; the other reason I won’t write a characterization document is that I always disagree with several items on any such document I’ve read for a fandom I write and that’s okay. not everyone is going to characterize everyone the same way or fully agree on what is or isn’t in character, and I don’t want to be too centralizing, you know?

so you know… the best place to start is to get started! good luck out there!

#answered #hopefully this helps?

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jhjluvs · 6 months

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a/n: hello i am back on my jiwoong enjoyer bullshit :p meant to post this yesterday when it was the 14th in korea but it wasn’t quite what i wanted it to be yet and today is thursday in the u.s. so technically it still counts as my woongie’s special day <3 this is messy and bad imo but ohh well,, enjoy the kitty sub!jiwoong x mommy dom!f!reader meal :33

makin out with jiwoong n sitting in his lap after having a celebratory birthday dinner together… he’d probably get needy just from a few kisses the poor needy thing :( with your fingers around his waist n your warm lips on his, he’d be like putty in your hands so quick!! you only need to hear him whimpering softly into your kisses a few times before you’re pulling away and looking jiwoong in the eyes, those pretty big brown eyes of his glazed over with arousal. he’s embarrassed, you can tell, and then you look down to see the bulge in his pants… almost immediately you’re thinkin about the ways you could absolutely ruin your sweet birthday boy :(

“i think someone’s not telling me something he should,” you pout, sticking out your bottom lip. jiwoong stays quiet, looking anywhere but at you to hide his embarrassment at being so desperate for you he’s hard just from kissing :((

“kitty, do you need my help with that?” you ask after a beat. jiwoong follows your gaze down to the tent in his crotch, and blushes furiously when he realizes jus how hard he actually is. you wait for him to nod affirmatively before you reach down to free his cock from his sweatpants, ignoring the way he gasps at the touches.

“mommy please, no teasing,” he whines pathetically. you haven’t even touched him properly and he’s sorrow about getting teased, silly baby :( his lower lip wobbles, too, possibly the cutest thing you’ve ever seen. he’s just so sensitive, poor boy :((

“kitty,” you faux-whine back. you start stroking his hard, leaking cock slowly after, relishing the way jiwoong whimpers and shudders at the touch. part of you wants to tease him as punishment for not telling you how needy he was, but you don’t. it is his birthday after all and he deserve to feel good!! your hands move up and down jiwoong’s length quickly, bringing him closer to release with each stroke. he whines again as you pick up the pace, squirming in your hold.

“mommy,” he pants, “m’gonna cum!”

“i don’t know that i want you to, kitty. not yet.”

“b-but!!”

jiwoong fully sobs when you stop touching him altogether. tears trickle down his pretty face as you keep stroking his cock. the poor kitty just wants to cum for you but you’re being sooo mean :((

“can you beg for mommy, kitty?” you ask. jiwoong nods. he’d do anything or you, after all.

“please, mommy, kitty wants to come,” he whimpers. “please, please, been so good!!”

“shh, you’ll get to come,” you say soothingly. “you’re such a good boy for me.”

“all for you,” jiwoong mumbles. he almost says something else before he cuts himself off weigh a whine when you go back to stroking his still-hard cock. you can’t help the self-satisfied smirk that forms when you hear your boy cry out in pleasure. it doesn’t take long for him to get close again, to be a whimpery mess under you. he’s so cute, moaning your name softly and tearing up with the pleasure gliding his already foggy brain as his orgasm approaches :( your precious kitty, so desperate for you :(

“mommy, can i?” he asks breathily a minute later. he’s sooo close, you can tell by the way his thighs shake under you. you look up at him from so your eyes meet. you nod.

“go ahead, kitty, come for mommy.”

that’s all it takes for him to groan and spill white onto your hand, murmuring his thanks and shaking still when you stroke him through the aftershocks.

“happy birthday, jiwoong,” you whisper as you lean in to kiss him sweetly.

#i Will spread the kitty jiwoong agenda one freaknasty smut piece at a time #hes a kitty To Me!!!#idk what it is abt me but i wanna see that man Whine #he’s just v obedient kitty coded to me !!#i hope he had the best bday ever too im sure he did 🥺#zb1 smut #jiwoong smut #☆. ˚ ₊ 𓏸 *

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ninja-knox-ur-sox-off · 11 months

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Oh gosh how am i gonna survive all this that last ep TOOK ME OUT and now THERE’S STILL AZURE TO TAKE CARE OF ITS INSANE HOW WELL THE CREW UTILIZES TEN MINUTE EPISODES I FEEL LIKE I WATCHED A WHOLE HALF SEASON SCREAMS

OKAYOKAY

PT 2 OF THE SPECIAL CALLED THE PLAN MAN OH THAT SOUNDS FUN AND CHILL LETS GO (lmk s4 special spoilers ahead)

OKAY HERE WE GO

SOBS LOUDLY LISTENING TO THE THEME SONG

I AM MENTALLY ILL Y’ALL

OKAY

OH HEY

OH HECK ANOTHER

ANOTHER FLASHBACK

OH MY GODS I WASN’T EXPECTING A WHOLE OTHER FLASHBACK

I THOUGHT IT WAS BROS SPARRING IN THE PRESENT BUT NO THIS IS

HECK OH MY GOSH

AZURE

YOU N ME

THE WAY

AZURE LOOKS

AT MONKEY KING

SUS PIECE OF CRAP

LOOKS AT HIM LIKE HE’S HIS HOPE FOR THE WORLD

HE IS JUST A TINY MONKEY AND HE’S USING HIM LIKE THAT

THAT’S INSANE

WUKONG REALLY SEEMS TO WANT TO IMPRESS AZURE AND BE A PART OF THAT AND AZURE FR SEES THAT AS A TOOL BUT THAT ITS OKAY THAT IT A TOOL WHAT AN INTERESTING AWFUL FELLA I HATE HIS BLUE FURRY FACE

ALL OF US :D

immediately looks for macaque THERE HE IS :D

NEW OUTFIT

HELP

HE SOUNDS LIKE AN ANGSTY TEENAGER

OKAY

THAT’S GREAT VIBES I’M WHEEZINGN;SLDFMAWOEF

WUKONG FR THE MOM FRIEND CONFIRMED? /J /J /J /J/ JJ

MACAQUE’S EXPRESSION PLEASE I’M CRYINGBDSF;LMW;EF

WOW HE’S

HE WASNT’ ALL FOR IT HUH

LOOK AT HIM

HECK DUDE

WHEN HE STARTS TO MAYBE SLOW DOWN A BIT

AZURE HYPES HIM RIGHT BACK UP

ALL BECAUSE OF YOU

PEOPLE WILL NEVER LIVE IN FEAR

AND THAT SOUNDS PRETTY GOOD

YOU KNOW THAT’S ROUGH

THIS VERSION OF MONKEY KING WAS MANIPULATED INTO THE DOING WHAT GOT HIM UNDER THE MOUNTAIN HUH, BUT WHILE THE OTHER PERSON NEVER ACTED LIEK THEY DID ANYTHIGN WRONG SO ALL HE COULD DO WAS BLAME HIMSELF MY GOSH

HOW DID THE CELESTIALS LET AZURE LIVE DUDE, HE LITERALLY IS AN EX CELESTIAL THAT MUTINIED AGAINST HEAVEN AND PUSHED PEOPLE INTO DOING SO, BUT BECAUSE MONKEY KING WAS AT THE HEAD HE GOT OFF WITH JUST THE SCROLL OR SOMETHING? THAT’S WILD

YA BIG SWEETIE

YOU ME AND THE BOYS

OH WOW HELLO

THAT WAS HIS FLASHBACK

YOU KNOW ITS ACTUALLY SO INTERESTING HOW AZURE DOESN’T THINK HE’S DOING ANYTHING WRONG

THAT’S WILD

ITS

ITS SO INTERESTING

THE WAY HE LOOKS AT HIM

ITS

ITS SO WHACK

WHAT IS THIS

I’M SO FASCINATED BY THE HECKING

SEEMS TO CARE SO MUCH??

BUT??

HE SUCKS??

SHAKES THIS BURNT PIECE OF MOLDY TOAST

FUNNY WHEN HE HAS EVERYHTING HE JUST KEEPS THINKING BACK TO WHEN HE JUST HAD THE BROTHERHOOD AND WUKONG

WHAT A FUNKY CHARACTER THEY’VE MADE HERE HE’S SO WEIRD

I WANT TO PUT HIM UNDER A MICROSCOPE

OHHHHOHO WHATS THAT

GOT DISTRACTED AND THINGS STARTED TO FALL APPART AGAIN

YELLOW-TUSK FR LIKE BRO SO MAYBE WE SHOULD TAKE A STEP BACK

WOW I FORGOT ABOTU THAT CLEVAGE

WOW WHO DREW THAT LAST FRAME

THE DETAIL

DANG

ALSO WOW I’M WHEEZINGNLS;DMASDF

THEY FR

I’M FULLY PREPARED FOR THE BROTHERHOOD TO TURN AGAINST AZURE BECAUSE THEY SEE HIM TEARING HIMSELF APART Y’KNOW?

MAN

M A N

AZURE FEELS LIKE WHAT HAPPENED WITH WUKONG WAS A BIG OL SACRIFICE HUH

SO INTERESTING

OWA

THEY BACK ON MOUNTAIN

SCREAAAMS

LOOOOOK

I’M WILL CRY

HELPGMLSDM

CHECKING OT MAKE SURE NO ONES THERE

THAT’S SO SILLY

HE’S BACK

WE GOT OUR MONKEY BACK

HELPGNLSKMDS

THE PENG STINKY LINES

EVERYBOIDY JUST HATES THAT GUY HUH THAT’S SO FUNNYGSDNFLWEMF

MONKEY CLASS IS IN SESSION I’M SMILING SO MUCH

SANDY

MY ABSOLUTELY BELOVED

AND PIGSY SO HECK

TANGS SO EXCITED ABOUT THIS HELPGN;LSDKFMD

HE’S STILL HASNT’ CHANGEED

NEZHA SITTING LIKE THAT IS SO FUNNY

Its actually so good to have monkey king back fr i’m in tears

smARTIE KID IS IN ATTENDENCE

SOBS

LITTLE LOTUS PRINCE

WHEEZING;SFAEW

“I’m… I’m not gonna do that” no yeah Zuko vibes i’m just gonna say it i’m sure someone else already has but i’m HGL;SDFJA;OIWEFMAFD

he’s gotta be like a teenager in this

he just has the vibes

I adore them all so much you don’t understand

MK’S FFACE WHEN SANDY INVITES NEZHA OVER

WISE MASTERS I’M BEING TRAINED BY THIS SEAOSNHGLKSDJSD TANG BREAKING THE FORTH WALL PLEASELGMS;DOFWE

WISE MASTER

LET ME KNOW WHEN HE GETS HEREEBGL;DSFMABG;OAIWF

THE CRAYON

THE

HELPGMNLSDKMAWE

“I think you burst a stitch” whoever drew Nezha looks like they’re having so much fun

YOU’LL BE FINEBG;LSMAOWEF

You know they’re really leaning into making Nezha seem more like a teen in this ep actually his energy is just off the charts amazing

BIG IMORTAL BABYGL;SDFJASDF

DO YOU WANT ME TO THROW CRAYONS AT YOU

IS THIS THE BREAK FILLER EPISDOE? BECAUE I’M LAUGHING SM AND ENJOYING THIS LIKE CRAZY ITS WONDERFUL

ALL THE PICTURES IN THE BACKGROUND ARE SO GODO

THE BOX OF CRAYONS PLS

“THAT’S WHAT I THOUGHT”

WHEEZING;LSDKFM

I LOVE HIM SM

OH RIGHT MONKEY MK

WE HAVEN’T REVISTED THAT HECK I WONDER IF HE’LL GO APE AGAIN

THEY?

PENG THEY/THEM PRONOUNS FR OH MY GODS HELLO?? OKAY THAT WAS DONE RIGHT I LOVE HOW CAUSAL IT WAS AND NOT A BIG DEAL BLESS YOU MONKIEI KID I’M ACTUALLY SO TIRED OF MEDIA MAKING IT A BIG INTRODUCTION DEAL EVERY TIME SOMEONE SAYS THEY’RE THEY/TEHM OR SOMEONE INTRODUCES THEM AS THEY THEM SO THIS IS SO FREAKING NICE BLESSSSS YOUUUU ALSO BEIGN THEY BUT BEING PART OF A BROTHER HOOD IT NTO BEING A BIG DEAL OR ANYTHING? AMAZING, 10/10 WE LOVE TO SEE IT I DON’T KNOW I JUST LOVE THAT SM

PENGS SUPER POWERFUL HELLO? COOL

HELPGN;LSDMA;OWEF

EVERYONE JUST

HATING ON PENG

I THOUGHT THEY WERE INTERESTING

CREW REALLY WENT

OH YEAH

THEY’LL HATE THIS ONE

AND DIDN’T WAIT FOR AN ANSWERGLKSMFAOWE

TOUGH SMART FASTER THAN HE LOOKS YELLOW-TUSK

OHHHH

I LOVE THAT ACTUALLY

WE’VE ALREADY GOT HINTS OF YELLOW-TUSK RECONSIDERING IT MIGHT TAKE LESS THAN YOU THINK

MAN ITS NICE

BUT HE’S NOT A MONSTER

WHY DID THAT GET OT ME

HELPGSL;KAEF

KAY

THIS

I NEED TO PROCESS LIEK THREE THINGS

NOTHING GETS UNDER HIS SKIN LIKE A MONKEY

HE BASICALLY JSUT “WE’RE GONNA ANNOY THE CRAP OUTTA THIS GUY MK AND ME”

ALSO WHATS WITH MACAQUE AND SMELLS THIS SEASON

LAST TIME IT WAS “interesting” AND NOW ITS “smells” I’MGBS;LDFKMWE

GONNA BE ON WUKONG LIKE A BAD SMELL

IS IT REVENGE HE WANTS? IS IT? I might be disappointed if its just revenge cause he doesn’t’ seem like he wants revenge so much as feels he needs Wukong out of the way and must make that sacrifice yada yada, revenge feels basic for what seems like a complex character rn y’know? bUT HEY LIKE EITHER WAY THEY DO IT I’M GONNA END UP LOVING IT CAUSE THEY DO IT SO WELL SO HECK IT MY GUYS

FR CALLING HIM A STINKY MONKY EVERY FIVE SECONDS I’M CRYIMNGNSD;FLKMWE

HEY

I GOT THE CRAYON I DO THE SAYIN

THAT’S SO FUNNY PLS GJLKSDJFL;WA;F

I LOVE HIM

I ADORE HIM

HE’S EVERYUTHING TO ME

once again Nezha is so good he’s just sitting there grumpy like

ALSO THE VOICE OF REASON HE REALLY IS

I actually

You know what

getting emotional over how they’re all on board with whatever plan monkey king comes up with this time

like season 3 they had nothing but doubts but now they’re all ready to hear him out and listen and OH MY GODS GUY’S HE’S ACTUALLY TELILNG THEM THE PLAN

THEY’RE KEEPIGN CAHRACTER GROWTH I’M IN TEARS

THIS IS ACTUALLY SO GOOD? BLESS YOU MONKIE KID CREW ILY

THE BRAINSTORMING TOGETHER

OH BOY HERE COMES TEENAGE SARCASM

Y’all if Mk’s older than Nezha- CAUSE I CONSIDER MK TO BE LIKE 20 OR SOMETHING AND IF NEZHA’S A TEEN THAT WOULD MAKE ALL OF THIS OS FREAKING FUNNY

THAT

WHAT A CRAYON

WHAT A HIT

THERE’S THAT POSE AGAIN

I’M CRYINGBSD;FAMWE

THIS IS EBAUTIFUL

THE CRAYONS

NO SARCASM ALLOWED IN MONKEY KINGS CLASSROOM

ON TRAINING TIME?

LETS GOOOOOOO

WAIT THIS IS SO FUN??

HELLO???

PIGSY JUST YOINKED THAT MAN

HUG

OH WOW THEY’RE ACTUALLY

OH THAT’S BEAUTIFUL

LOOK AT THIS HYPE BATTLE

THIS IS SO NICE

OH ARMOR???

POWER UP

LOOK AT HIS PROUD EXPRESSION

FREE POWER UPS WITH ARMOR FOR FREE

LETS GOOOO

WHERE’S OUR COOL BATTLE ARMOR

AWW WHEN YOU’VE EARNED IT

WHEEZINGS;AFMAWEO

HELPGMNLSKFMEW

ITS THEIR WEAPONS

THATS SO FREAKIGN FUNNY

WHAT A NICE MONTOGUE

“so we all know i’m the greatest teacher in history”

“ughhhhh this guy” MACAQUE’S QUIET COMEMNTARY PLEASE;GSMKF

HEY

OKAY HURTFUL

PLEASEL;KMGSDF

HE’S NOT THAT BAD

LIKE HE SAYS JUST NEEDS SOME WORK

HE’S ACTUALLY PRETTY DECENT HIS EXPLAINING JUST NEEDS A LOT OF WORK

BUT ALSO ITS?? SO NICE?? HE’S COMFORTABLE SAYING HE’S GOTTA WORK ON THAT NOW?? ITS GORGEOUS I’M CRYING I LOVE HIM

MK TIMEEEE

I LOVE THAT

SHOWING HIM HE TRUSTS HIM AND LETTING HIM BE INVOLVED

NGL MONKEY KING AS A MENTOR REALLY IS SO GOOD

MEI LOOKS SO HAPPY FO RHIM LIKE YUP

CAUSE YOUR’E THE PLAN MAN MAN

SUPPORTIVE DADSY

MK’S LITTLE BASHFUL SMILE

I ADORE

“I mean one of us could beat him, one of us specifically”

“NOPE NONE OF US AT ALL.” HELPT THAT’S SO FUNNYGHDSNFASMF

GET SCROLL

SLAP EM BACK IN

HELPNL;SKMASDF

JUST

SLAP EM BACK IN WHERE THEY GOT OUT OF

AND EVERYHTING WILL BE BACK TO NORMAL

Y’KNOW ASIDE FROM

NO JADE EMPEROR

HOW’S THAT GONNA WORK

HELPGLSDF

THE WAY MK DRAWS THEM ALL

MONKEY KING LIKE THAT

NEZHA LIKE AN OLD MAN

TANG GETTING A PIGGY BACK RIDE ON PIGSY G ET IT? CAUSE PIG?

SANDY CARRYING MACAQUE AND MACAQUE’S BLANK EXPRESSION I LOVE THIS

HELPGNSDF

MACAQUE ON TOP OF THE BLIMP

Mk’s doodles for how they win is actually

so good

always

they make me so happy

Nezha still looking like half deadNG;LAKWMFE

SOUNDS LIKE YOU’RE ALL OVER IT SANDY

WELP LOOKS LIKE HE’S BUILDING ANOTHER BLIMP HUH

THE WAY HE DRAWS AZURE

OH MY GODS WHO DREW THESE

I NEED TO HAND THEM ALL MY MORTAL POSSESSIONS FOR HOW THEY’RE DRAWING MACAQUE AND NEZHA I’M CRYING;DSAWE

HE’S FACEDOWN ON THE FLOOR

MACAQUE IS JUST STANDING THERE I’MGNMSLDFMD

LOOK AT HIM DRAW

“If you have to ask… you’re probably on team be”

HE’S SO ANNOYED ABOUT HTAT PLEASE;LKMGSF

PLS MONKEY KINGS’ APPLAUDING IN THE DOODLE, THINKS MK’S SO COOL AND EPIC, HE DOES MK I PROMISE YOU HE THINKS YOU[‘RE COOL YOU ARE COOL

THE DBK FAM ARE FRIENDS

I LOVE THAT SO MUCH

I LOVE THIS SHOW

WHOEVER DREW DBK I NEED THAT AS KEYCHAIN OR STICKER OR ANYTHING

SHHHLURP UP THE BAD GUYS

SO THEY CAN NEVER MAKE US FACE THEIR NIGHTMARES AGAIN

WHY DO THEY KEEP DRAWING HIM LIKE THAT’ PLEASE ITS SO CREEPYGSLF;

WE;’RE ALL GONAN DIENG;LSMF

THANKS TANG

AGAIN

NEZHA IS JUST

SITTING THER I’M WHEEZING

LOOK AT THE ROOM

I LOVE HOW MESSY IT IS ITS SO NICE

I LOVE THAT PIGSY’S ON THE FLOR HE LOOKS COMFY

THIS IS A SILLY PLANNING EPISODE I LOVE IT SM

Okay y’all can trash talk Peng all you want I actually adore them, they’re so dramatic, Macaque has chilled out and now we have this guy and i love them

I LOVE HOW THEY’RE

ITS JUST THE TWO OF THEM

AT A BIG OL BANQUET TABLE

PENG ILY

YOU’RE SO FUNKY

a little chaos might be good for the world

WHY DO I FEEL LIKE AZURE’S GONNA WALK IN AND BEAT UP YELLOW TUSK OR SOEMTHING

OR GO BACK INTO THE SHADOWS ANGRY

I DON’T KONW

I LOVE THAT YELLOW-TUSK KNOWS ITS NOT SUSTAINABLE

HECK DUDE

HE’S ACTUALLY HORRIFYING

HOLD UP THAT WAS CHILLING

COMES TO FIND THEM ALL HAPPY AND JUST

WOW HE’S NOT DOING SO HOT

also wow yeah that’s a lot of cleavage monkie kid why you’re killing me here i can’t take him seirouslyGN;LAMFAWE;NF

YEAH THOSE DUDES LOOK TERRIFIED

HE’S

STILL SMILING

PENG’S SWEATING

HE’S TRYING TO HYPE THEM

AND HE’S

NOT LOOKING GOOD

PENG TRYING TO

YELLOW TUSK IN TROUBLE

LETS GOOOOOOOOOO

THREAT TIME

OHHO

NOT THREAT

PENG

PENG HOW DID YOU KNOW THIS??

HOW OD YOU KNOW THIS??

OHHHHHH

OHHHHHHO

WAIT THIS IS LIKE

POWERFUL PERSON

IS DISTRACTED BY ONE PERSON

SO ITS NOT LIKE REVENGE ITS LIKE

NEED THEM GONE SO I CAN FOCUS

CAUSE IF NOT THEY’RE ALL I CAN THINK ABOUT

HOW INTERESTING

THEY’RE SO WEIRD

AZURE IS SO WEIRD

CACKLES

OKAY

WELL NOW I’M A LITTLE WORRIED FOR WUKONG

BUT

ITS NICE THEY CAN REALLY DISTRACT HIM NOW

ITS INTERESTING HOW YELLOW-TUSK WANTS TO CONFRONT IT AND PENG WANTS TO IGNROE IT, THIS IS LIKE DYSFUNCTIONAL TOXIC FMAILY ALMOST

(i’ve been watching too many therapy videos)

AHEM

ANYWAY

AZURE SURE IS A GUY

I HOPE WUKONG IS GONNA BE OKAY

HELPGPGLKSDMF

THEY GOT AMROUR FOR HTE LITTLE MONKEGSDNBF;ANFA;AWE

OH MY GODS

PIGSY

HE MADE THEM A SILLY LITTLE APRON

AND CARVED THE LITTLE MONKEY A WOODEN SPOON THATS SO HECKING CUTE YOU GUYS

ONE MONKEY APPRANTLY JUST LIKES HANGING WITH PIGSY IG

THAT’S SO NCIE

actually whoever drew pigsy there i would like to high five you you drew him so nice and shaped i adore

DRAMATIC MACAQUE

OH SANDY YOU’RE GONNA PASS OUT BLOWING THAT UP

scary? ;-;

nooooo

buddyyyyyy

YUP HE STILL HASNT’ ACCEPTED THAT PART OF HIMSELF THAT’S

YEAH

HECK DUDE

WHO DREW THAT

WHO DREW THE “IT’LL BE FINE” WHO MADE HIM SHAPED LIKE THAT I’M CRYNIGBDSF;LKMAO;EF WELL DONE IM CHOKIGNSD;FM

WHEN WE LOOK THIS GOOD AIN’T NOTHIGN GONNA BEAT US

HE IS

TRYING SO HARD

COME ON WUKONG U GOTTA TALK TO HIM

PLS DONT’ CALL UR MONKEY FROM SCARY MKKKKKKK WUKONG IS A MONKEEEYYY

;-;

u cant just

ignore this whole part of ur power cause it scares you |;A;/

PLSSSS

UH OH

LOOKS LIKE HE CAME TO THEM

MACAQUE INSTANTLY SHADOW TRAVELING EVERYBODY TO THEM

HOT DANG HE IS ON THE BALL

PIGSY AND DANG FALT ON THE GROUNDMGDFSFD

OH MY GOODNESS THAT IS GONNA MAKE SUCH A TRANSITION FOR AMVS HOLY CRAP I’M EYEING UP THAT BIT

OH BOY

MK BUDDY YOU MIGHT HAVE TO MONKEY UP TO SAVE YOUR MENTOR U H

WHAT A LINE ACTUALLY

I WILL TEST THE LIMITS OF SUN WUKONGS IMMORTALITY

THAT WAS

WHAT A LINE

HECKING

SCREAMS

OKAY

THAT WAS PRETTY CHILL ALL THINGS CONSIDERED

NOW WE GET TO THE AMV RICH ANIAMTION HUH?

THERE’S TWO MORE EPISODES AND THAT’S IT

THERE’S TWO MORE FULL EPISODES THAT MAKES ME SO WORRIED FOR WUKONG

I LOVE HOW THIS EPISODE ILLISTRAITED SO MUCH CHRACTER GROWTH AND POINTED OUT WHERE MK NEEDS MORE OF IT

SCREAMS

OKAY

I NEED TO GET MOVING TO THE NEXT ONE PEACE

KNOX OUT

#long post #knox rambles #knox reacts #monkie kid season 4 spoilers #monkie kid season 4 special spoilers #lmk s4 special spoilers #lmk s4 spoilers

46 notes · View notes

enid-rhees · 18 days

Text

amnesia | elisia brown x fem!reader

summary: you were never the same after Elisia broke up with you for her new boyfriend, and you start to question if she’s even truly happier with him, or if she ever was with you.

warnings: angst but comfort at the end. reader is fr going through it. weed (smoke responsibly!) reader has a bit of an addiction to it.

genre: exes to lovers

Elisia Brown Masterlist

(listen to this song because i am basing this story COMPLETELY around this song. i just added a happy ending for my own personal sanity.)

“just tell me the truth!” you cried. “why are you breaking up with me? we’re fine. everything is fine. i don’t understand.”

Elisia could only stare at you, but she was holding back her words. your heart started to rip open slowly. “tell me, Elisia.”

“i met someone.” she said quietly, staring down at the ground. your mouth fell open with a silent sob. the final string of your heart had been pulled, and you could only muster up the courage to whisper, “leave.”

the metal chains of the swing you sat on felt colder than the actual weather. you took your hands off of them and reached into the pockets of your hoodie, pulling out a joint and a lighter. you put the joint between your lips and lit it, immediately inhaling. you closed your eyes at the sensation of the smoke floating down to your lungs, exhaling and watching the smoke fly and disappear into the air.

you opened your eyes and looked over at the empty swing beside you, only moving back and forth slowly with the wind. in a sense, it still felt like Elisia was sitting here next to you. she would be talking about her day or how classes went, and you two would be passing a joint to each other every few minutes. your hands would be intertwined in the middle of the swings you sat on.

you tore your eyes away from the swing, the memories coming back were too much to handle. just being in this park was too much to handle, but you didn’t know where else to go. this is where you went to escape from everything, to be with Elisia and forget about your troubles, but you couldn’t even do that here anymore.

everywhere reminded you of Elisia. the park, your own home, school, everywhere. you wished that you could just forget about all of it, and move on. because clearly, Elisia did. you were a few steps behind on that.

you finished the joint and threw the empty filter to the ground, using your foot to burry it in the mulch. the effects had fully kicked in — you felt weightless. you leaned your head on the chain and continued to swing slowly.

your peace was ended when your phone started to ring. you sighed and pulled it out of your pocket, clicking the green button that illuminated your phone. “hello?” you asked, voice raspy from the joint. “Y/N? it’s Rowan.” her voice came through, and you sat back up. “what’s up?”

“i just… haven’t heard from you in a while. wanted to check up on you.” Rowan said. you sighed and looked down. “i’m fine.” you told her. there was a few moments of silence, and then Rowan said, “you don’t have to lie to me. i’m your friend. i wouldn’t have called if i wasn’t worried.”

“have you seen.. her? how is she?” you asked her, ignoring what she said. you couldn’t even say her name, it hurt too much. “she’s… doing fine.” you could tell Rowan was holding back saying more, but for the sake of you, she wouldn’t say it. “she’s with Ash right now.” you winced at his name and your fingers squeezed your phone tightly. you hummed in response, suddenly getting a tight feeling in your chest. “i gotta go, Rowan.”

“wait-“ you hung up and shoved your phone back in your pocket, squeezing your eyes shut as tears threatened to fall from them. you hated this, it was so stupid.

it’s been a month, and the same question still swarmed your head every minute. what did you do?

you and Elisia were perfect, absolutely perfect. you hadn’t fought, you trusted her wholly and she did the same, you didn’t understand what went wrong, why she decided one day that she didn’t want you anymore. did he make her happier? you broke your back for her, to make her happy even if it was for a minute. were you not enough? why was Ash so much better than you?

you missed Elisia. you missed her voice, her laugh, her hugs, her kisses, the list could go on. all you wanted was her. you just wanted her back. but does she want you back? does she still think about you the way you think about her? probably not, but you still held onto the little hope you had left.

everything suddenly felt like a lie — your entire relationship. Elisia seemed fine with Ash, she looked so happy. was she ever happy with you? how can she be fine? after two years of dating, breaking up didn’t effect her the way it effected you. did Elisia ever… love you? was she just waiting for the right moment to finally break it off?

you tried to shake the thoughts out of your head as quick as possible. the more you kept pondering the same questions, you would never move on.

you didn’t want to move on.

the sky started to slowly darken above you, and that was your sign to start going back home. you hopped off the swing and started to walk away towards the direction of your house.

when you made it back home, the house was dark and quiet. you walked inside your bedroom and flicked your light on so you could see. you opened your dressers and pulled out a loose shirt and shorts, changing into them and turning your light back off.

you fell into your bed and wrapped yourself in your blankets. next to you, on your bedside table, a picture of you and Elisia stared right at you. you never put it away after the breakup, you couldn’t find the strength to.

Elisia was smiling at you in the picture, lipstick marks decorating her face that was obviously done by you. you remember that day so clearly — you, Elisia, Rowan and Hailey were at Hailey’s house for the day and you started to scavenge through her makeup for fun. you applied a bright red lipstick shade to your lips and started attacking Elisia in kisses. Rowan had no choice but to take a photo.

you slammed the photo down so you couldn’t look at it and turned over in your bed — only to be met with the cat plushy Elisia bought you. hesitantly, you reached your hand out and took hold of the plushy, holding it close to your chest. it still smelled like Elisia, and you couldn’t help but bring your head down and sniff it. her scent used to be relaxing — relieving actually. every time she would take you in her arms, you felt safe, but you didn’t feel any of that when you held the plushy.

a single tear fell from your eye as you buried your face into your pillow, hoping the effects from the joint will erase all of this from your memory tomorrow.

“hey!” you heard a shout, you turned around and shut your locker as Rowan started to run towards you. a small smile made its way to your lips. “hi, Rowan.”

she pulled you into an unexpected hug. “it’s been a bit since i’ve seen you. you don’t even sit at lunch anymore. and you’re so quiet in our classes.” Rowan pouted. you sighed, feeling slightly guilty for shutting everyone out.

“i’m sorry, Ro. i’m just not… feeling that great.” Rowan pulled away but kept a hand on your shoulder. “do you need to talk about it? keeping it in will make it worse. i’m worried for you.” she spoke sincerely. you hesitated, “i’m just… not over her. and i don’t think i will be for a while, no matter how hard i try. i love her. i can’t just… move on the way she did.”

“i mean- everything reminds me of her, Rowan.” you said, voice cracking as you tried to keep it together in the hallway. “and i mean everything. we did everything together and it all had such… meaning. i can’t just forget everything we did. and i’m starting to think with the way she moved on- she never felt what i felt. that she never… loved me.” a few tears slipped from your eyes but you quickly wiped them away.

“don’t say that, Y/N.” Rowan spoke, but you shook your head. “how am i not supposed to think that, Rowan? nothing was wrong between us, we were perfect. i thought she was just as happy as i was, but i was wrong, and she found someone new when we were still together. she doesn’t love me and i don’t think she ever did. and that’s that. i couldn’t make her as happy as he does.” you stated firmly, even though it was getting harder by the second to keep yourself together. vocalizing your thoughts made everything feel more real. you tried to deny it, but now, maybe you were right.

you looked over Rowan’s shoulder, and you froze. Elisia was staring right at you, as if she had just heard everything you said. your throat felt tight as you looked away immediately. “i-i need to go.” you choked out. tears started to flow down your cheeks as you walked off as quickly as you could, ignoring Rowan shouting your name. your hand went over your mouth when you felt your face start to crinkle, on the brink of sobbing in the middle of the hallway.

you managed to find a bathroom and locked yourself in one of the stalls. now that you were alone, the sobs broke free. you couldn’t help the cries that left your lips, and you didn’t have the energy to try and muffle them. you just needed to let everything out. saying everything out loud made it all too real, and now you couldn’t handle it.

after what felt like maybe 20 minutes, you took a few deep breaths and wiped your eyes for a good minute. you left the stall and went to the sink, taking a paper towel and soaking it in water to pat against your face. you stared at your reflection for a moment. anyone who walked past you could easily tell something was wrong just by looking at your bloodshot eyes.

you left the bathroom and found the nearest exit, finally leaving that awful building. the walk home was excruciatingly long as you were only left with your racing thoughts.

when you saw Elisia, that was the first you had seen her in a while — practically since the break up — and of course it had to be when you were talking about her. she looked tired, and her eyes were filled with sadness when you guys locked eyes. seeing her was too much to bare, you couldn’t do it. so you ran. seeing her face brought you back to the night she broke up with you.

as you walked down the street, shouting could be heard from the coffee shop across from you. you stopped in your tracks when you realized who it was. Elisia and Ash. you couldn’t understand what they were yelling about, their voices yelling and mashing into each other. but you could very clearly see Elisia was distressed, while Ash only grew more irritable at her.

is this what she left you for?

you hoped Elisia remembers the countless love letters you’ve written for her, stored away in a box you made just for her. you hope she goes back in that box during times like this, and reads the words you wrote her when he tears her down like that.

there wasn’t anything you could do, so you turned around and began walking back home. their voices faded out the farther you walked, and eventually it was quiet again. it was just you, alone… again.

your house was quiet when you unlocked the door — no surprise to you. you didn’t even bother trying to call out anyone’s names — they weren’t there, they never were anymore. your bag fell to the floor with an echoed thump, and you sunk into your couch cushions.

sleep started to overcome you and your eyes began to slowly droop until they shut completely, and you fell asleep a few moments later.

“y/n.” Elisia stood in front of you. still looking as beautiful as ever.

“i’m sorry.” she said in a whisper, voice cracking and eyes filling with tears. “i- i should’ve never broken up with you like that. it was stupid, i’m still in love with you. i never stopped. please… i just want you back.”

your eyes stared into hers, unsure if you should believe her or not. you wanted to give in right away, to lean in and kiss her for the first time in a month. you wanted to finally feel her soft lips against yours like you would every single day before she ended everything.

“i want to believe you- but-“ Elisia cut you off. “please believe me.” she cried. Elisia took a few steps forward, hands hesitantly reaching to grab yours. your hand flinched under her touch, but you relaxed immediately at the feeling. no matter what, she would never stop having that effect on you.

Elisia leaned forward slowly, lips parting as they got closer to yours. your lips locked, and-

“Y/N!” a shouting voice woke you up, and you looked around before your eyes landed on Rowan. her eyebrows raised in worry, “are you okay?”

“how- how did you get in?” you asked, rubbing the tired out of your eyes. “you left your door unlocked. i called and texted you like a million times and you weren’t answering. so i came here to see if you were okay… and- and you kept mumbling Elisia’s name in your sleep.”

you sighed and put your head in your hands. the couch dipped as Rowan sat down next to you, wrapping her arm around your shoulders. “i saw them fighting today. outside the coffee shop.” you told Rowan, lifting your head back up. she furrowed her eyebrows. “me and Elisia… never fought. not even once. and it seemed like that wasn’t the first time they’ve done that.”

“did you hear what it was about?” Rowan question, but you shook your head. “no… they were yelling so much that their words were just… tangled together. i couldn’t understand what either of them were saying, but i could tell you that Elisia looked heartbroken, and Ash.. he just looked mad. she doesn’t deserve whatever he’s doing to her.”

Rowan pouted, “she doesn’t seem the same anymore. whatever’s going on between them… she’s changed.” you sighed and stood up. “i don’t understand. i don’t understand why she would leave me for this. what did i do wrong?”

“i don’t think you did anything wrong, Y/N. i think Elisia just… thought this is what she wanted. but me and you both know it’s not. we just have to hope that she sees that one day.” you nodded. “i just hope she still has those letters i wrote her. and she rereads them when he says those awful things to her.”

Rowan stood up with you and pulled you into a tight hug. “i know you guys haven’t spoke since the breakup, but i know she still cares so much about you.”

“did she say anything when she you know… overheard me?” Rowan sighed in your hair, “no. but she looked… different. like she was contemplating hard.”

you were back at the park. despite how much it hurt to be here, you didn’t know where else to go. you stuck another joint between your lips and lit the end of it, sucking in the harsh smoke. it almost hurt your throat, but you got used to it.

you pulled your wired earbuds out of your pocket and plugged them in your ear, raising the volume up as you clicked on a playlist.

your head hit the metal chain you were holding onto. it made your hands freeze, but they slowly warmed up the more you smoked. you closed your eyes and sunk into the music that played through your earbuds. everything around you was finally blacked out from your thoughts, and you felt weightless. finally at some sort of peace.

you planted your feet on the ground and pushed yourself forward, letting yourself start to swing. you didn’t go too high, your feet barely left the ground, but it felt good when your head was fuzzy. the air pushing through your face felt so good.

you suddenly felt the metal bar above you creek, as if someone sat down on the vacant swing next to you. you almost didn’t want to open your eyes, but something forced you to. your eyes slowly opened as you turned your head, and you froze in your place.

“Elisia?” you whispered after a long, silent moment.

“hey.” she said hesitantly, looking down at her hands and fumbling with the bracelets around her wrist. you looked down at them, tears already lining your eyes. she never took off the ones you gave her. you shook your head and rubbed your eyes “what do you want?” you asked, voice going lower.

“to talk.” is all she said. you raised your eyebrows, and Elisia sighed. “to apologize.” she reiterated. “i broke up with Ash.” she told you, and you tried to ignore the jump your heart did. “and… i know you saw what happened yesterday.” she added on quietly.

you didn’t say anything. “i don’t know what i was thinking.” Elisia chuckled to herself. “no one can ever… be as good to me as you were, Y/N.” she said, moving her body so she was facing you entirely. your blank expression didn’t budge, you didn’t want to give into this so quickly.

“me and him… we just fought so much. and it was always because of him. he just- he wasn’t who i thought he was. but you- you were so perfect, so kind, and you treated me so good, i don’t know why i ever thought to hurt you like i did. because i know what it’s doing to you and it’s killing me, Y/N.” the tears came back into your eyes as you avoided eye contact with her. “i’m so sorry, Y/N. and i know that’s not enough, and nothing will be after what i did. but…”

“i’m still in love with you, Y/N. i never stopped loving you, ever. i thought about you every single day, everything i saw reminded me of you. you’re meant to be in my life, and i was so stupid to not see that.”

you sucked in a deep breath, not knowing what to say after that. you’ve spent a month telling yourself that Elisia had never truly loved you after leaving like that, but now Elisia is saying the complete opposite. are you supposed to believe her? you want to, so bad. but you’re scared of getting hurt again.

“i want to believe you, Elisia.” you finally spoke up, voice cracking as you tried not to break. “but i just don’t know what to believe. you left me like it was nothing, you left me so easily and it made me believe that you had never loved me the way i loved you. but now you’re saying all of this… and my head is just spinning.” you admitted, squeezing the metal bars.

“i love you endlessly, Y/N. i don’t know what i was thinking, but i’ll never forgive myself for doing what i did. and it’s completely understandable if you don’t forgive me either, i just needed you to know that i’ve always loved you and have never stopped, and i don’t plan on stopping.”

a teary-eyed smile painted your lips and you looked down at your legs. “i’ve always loved you too, Els.” her smile widened at the use of your nickname for her. she stood up from the swing and walked over to you, and you happily welcomed her to sit on your thighs.

“i’ll do anything to make up for what i did, okay? anything you want.” Elisia promised. “anything?” you asked with a smile. Elisia’s face turned red and she laughed softly, “anything,” she repeated.

“lets start with this.” you smiled, putting a hand on the back of her head and pulled her lips onto yours for the first time in a month. you felt utter bliss with her lips on yours, moving in sync and both of you so desperate to feel each other like this again.

A/N: hey :) my first time uploading a fic in a few months… and i know it’s not the best, i really haven’t had much time to be on here, but i feel like i abandoned everything and wanted to continue at least one of my drafts.

i still won’t be as active unfortunately, i’m just terribly busy with my job, and i barely have time for myself sometimes. and when i do, i just don’t have the motivation to write. but it’s still my passion, it hurts to not be able to fulfill it the way i want to.

i love you all and thank you so much from the bottom of my heart for still being supportive and liking, rb, and following me. it means so much. i’ll try to be active when i can.

#divider creds : cafekitsune #elisia brown #elisia brown x fem!reader #elisia brown x reader #t@gged #t@gged x reader #t@gged blurb #elisia brown t@gged #t@gged x fem!reader

18 notes · View notes

void-spells · 5 months

Text

Survivor time! (Actually 2 sessions bc I got a new PC between em)

Mission with Bode!!!

Go's I wish Bode was a woman bc I would be SO in love with her

Damn Rayvis saw Cal and just went. Yoink!

Is it just me or does Dagan's general cadence sound a lot like ROTS Anakin? Is that intentional? Every time I hear him speak all I hear is "I have brought PEACE! FREEDOM! JUSTICE! and security to my new Empire!"

Did....this this fucker just call Cal a wretch? Hello????

Escape pod ptsd.....my baby boy,,,,,,,

BOGLING YOU ARE SO SO MUDDY!!!!!! YOU ARE SO ABSOLUTELY COVERED IN MUD MY GOOD MADAM!!!

The middle part hair style just kinda. Makes me think of Tim Minchin ngl. All Cal needs is the messy eye makeup and a fresh mental breakdown

New PC Time!

It is also cold and rainy so I have me some warm spiked apple cider!!

Oh man this is a whole different game when I can turn graphics as high as they go...windswept hair still looks terrible when it moves

I'm supposed to go to the crumbly moon but....I wanna explore Koboh some more.

Also WHAT did Cal do to his shoulder!!! Why are like threw of his idle animations stretching out his right shoulder!!!!

Oh wait i accidentally wrote that with my fic Sugaan Essena, didn't I...

I should write a "how Cal fucked up his shoulder" fic but on purpose this time

Oh shit! BD has a taser gun now!!

HUH????

I THOUGHT THE FANDOM MADE HIM UP

RICK THE DOOR TECHNICIAN?!?!?!?!?

RICK WHY WERE YOU DRESSED AS A TROOPER??? YOU'RE A DOOR TECH RICK!!! YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO DIE, RICK!!!!

Rip in pieces Rickaroni the door guy

Have this sick ass screencap I got in honor of Rickolas

Okay....now I will go to the shatter—oh wait I can open new chests with the taser gun

Okay NOW I will go to—what's over here?

....I feel like this will be important later....

Very surprised nothing happened in the suspiciously arena-shaped room with the echo at the far end of it and a big ol door

Okay. NOW—lemme get more bourbon

NOW I go to the shattered moon!

OH FUCK MERRIN JUMPSCARE

Ngl I fully forgot she came to Koboh..finished chatting with Bode and Greez on the Mantis and turned around to see a whole other person

Merrin why are you LOOKING at him like that!!!!

Rayvis stop TALKING to me! I'm literally gonna GET you!!

Oh fuck two spiked apple ciders in is NOT the time for this Big Laser Dodging

Why is every bad guy so OBSESSED with Cal! He isn't into you!!! Stop talking to him!!!!

I am so SO enamored with how this fucker died. A vision

RAYVIS FIGHT RAYVIS FIGHT! He creeps me out almost as much as Malicos did every time he spoke to my boy

RAYVIS CTHULU CONFIRMED????????? ON CAMERA??????????

Weeps and sobs in 2 part fight.....

Takoyaki time

Cal I support you killing anyone who picks you up like an invasive gecko the way Rayvis did on the Lucrehulk

Don't beat yourself up Cal!! You did good!!!

Also makes me feel Emotions how Cal is honestly comparing Dagan turning against the Jedi and going insane over Tanalorr to....him being a little intense about fighting back as a victim of genocide. Sweetie. Those situations are so uncomparable

Return to Koboh!!!!! And I will have another drink and go to bed!!

#voids survivor playthrough #jedi survivor #jedi survivor spoilers #rayvis grabbing cal reminded me pf that one guy who walks around barefoot in the florida everglades #picking up various animals who are never happy about it and going “yoink!”

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mochiwrites · 1 year

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mochi, you mad lad, you tore my heart out with the new chapter. i'm a mess, you've made me sad with scar's line of "why me?" SOBBING!!!!! LIKE HELLO?????? IM NOT OVER IT????? especially with his suspicion of why grian was there:

"Yet there is also hesitation in that question, as if Scar is assuming a certain reaction from him, a certain reply. It’s as if Scar has already run through this exchange in his mind, and already knows the outcome."

his guard was up, fully expecting grian to want to take a life or some other offer and was preparing himself for disappointment. Ough, screaming. and finally, grian not wanting to communicate to "solve the puzzle" because he's worried about exposing himself and his feelings to scar.... my guy, please open up or i'll squeeze him like a squeaky toy. absolutely ring him out like a wet rag... i realize this got long and should just add it to my comment on ao3, sorry ahhh

-Ursa

EHEHEHEHE

please I’m STILL not over that “why me?” “why not you” exchange. like I am SO weak for grian looking at scar like he’s the most important thing in the world to him all while like. rubbing his thumb over the hearts on scar’s wrist. it makes me AAAAAAAAAAAAA

AND YESSSSSS!!!!!! I was trying to imply that when grian was asking scar how to do the /givelife command, scar was thinking back to when ll!grian stole a life from him. and he really believed it was a set up ( though we’ll on That more in the next chapter :3 )

there’s just. So much good stuff in this chapter Mhm mhm mhm

( also you’re 100% fine !!! :D I don’t mind long asks at all <3 )

#mochi speaks #last life au

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terrence-silver · 2 years

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Would you write something about beloved being way to hard on themselves and struggling with insecurities? Terry’s never made them feel like this, but they’ve always struggled with the way they look, and can’t understand what Terry sees in them. Maybe Terry comes home from work to find beloved situated in front of a full body mirror, crying and analyzing the imperfections that are invisible to any other eye. Usually Terry would feel apathy towards this display of emotion, but it’s different with beloved. What lengths would Terry go to in order to show beloved how much he loves and is attracted to them?

---

-"Feel it."-

When he comes back to the estate and finds you sobbing in front of the carved, ornate bedroom mirror, he spins you around at whirlwind speed and places the palm of your hand over the outline of his cock tucked inside of his dressing trousers as an elaborate 'Hello, honey, I'm home!' of sorts. You gasp, not hearing him show himself inside the master sleeping chamber. Thing is, he sneaked in, ambushing you and it was that simple for him. He came home already reeling with absolute need, accumulated and heightened through absence. -"Terry! What, I ---"- You gasp, startled to the bone and entirely caught off guard, eyes reddened with tears. Third time this week he has found you sniveling and crying home alone over what you considered imaginary physical imperfections (once alerted by his staff calling him, and twice on his own accord, spying your antics through the camera feed) and the third time this week Terry Silver has had just about enough, patience wearing dangerously thin on the issue, like ice about to crack, wishing he could pin point causes, circumstances, individuals and reasons why you felt this and destroy everything that ever caused you injury. Avenge you. If you didn't stop this, he'd have every mirror in the mansion singlehandedly smashed by ramming his own fist into each and every one for warm-up practice and then having it thrown off of the balcony. Did you want a set of billboards with your face overlooking LA with the words 'The most beautiful being that has ever walked this godforsaken city and every precinct, county and street. This State. This everything.'? Is that what you wanted? Because that could be easily arranged. Would cost cheap change.

Only thing preventing Terry was the jealousy that came with a city of ten million people looking at you at all.

-"You think there's no desire here, huh? For you?"-

He asks, gravely, maintaining unflinching eye contact, holding back anger.

Fingers intermingled with yours over the hem of his erection.

You weren't even together today and he still ---

-"Even your tears get me hard."-

Terry leans down with lips reaching the shell of your ears and he whispers, half growling, half purring, squeezing your hand around his groin and trapping it firmly in place, cupping himself with the pressure and the blood delicious mingling down in his muscles, inhaling the salt and the wetness on your warm cheek, right before kissing away one, and then two and then three, finding himself licking your face clean of all the signs of crying, like a beast grooming another beast in the wild --- Terry could fully imagine getting himself off like this, on the spot and entirely dry. Yes, you were beautiful smiling. Beautiful flushed with ire. Beautiful weeping (particularly then). Beautiful in bed under him. Beautiful begging. Beautiful riding his cock. Beautiful eating dinner with him and soaking up the sunlight. Beautiful clean and covered with his cum and beautiful at night and during the day and always, and much like only a Sensei knew how, Terry Silver would teach and drill that fact into your skull by any means necessary until it was borderline a shamelessly delusional, irrefutable truth in your mind. -"Now say it."- Terry separates his greedy saliva coated tongue from your cheeks moistened by tears. and he speaks, grim, humorless. -"Say what?"- You whimper and stutter, shivering, shaken and confused, peering up at him like a lost lamb. You were holding his cock aroused for you and really didn't know what that meant or what he wanted you to say right about now, huh? Terry straightens his shoulders, dignified, telling you precisely what he wanted to hear you tell him, to his face, time and time again, for as long as it would take, until the lesson stuck with you. -"I am the most beautiful person in the world and I belong to you, Mr. Silver"-

#terry silver #kk3 #cobra kai #terry silver x reader #terry silver x beloved #tw; insecurities #tw; body issues #tw; raunchiness #tw; and a lot of a fluff

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baekhvuns · 2 years

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I know I missed screaming about bullshit on your blog! Yes I literally had 4 days of feeling good after bronchitis then boom COVID TIME 😭 my respiratory system is in shambles, but it's getting better. Omg that trip sounds cool, any ghosts buddies? I was in Spain, Germany and Czechia. Next week I'm going to Malta though it's period time so 💀💀💀💀

I'm crying at that fan with the rose isuduwhdhshhsjsjshssg but this is cute

Baker Hwa just like in my dream wtf. Delinquent Hwa who uses the window to get to the snakcs first, imagine fighting him for strawberry milk

I got TWO POLAROIDS so far one Seonghwa and one Yunho! But Yunho went to my friend.

Yes one thing Seonghwa will do is L👁👁K 😭 it was nice to see him after a long time and apparently he was happy to see me as well. I hated when he showed his bicep THANKFULLY he was wearing that fishing net outfit so they hwarms weren't that visible 💀🤚🏻

Seonghwa will have to come see me soon hahahaha. Omfg right ticketing is happening, good luck!!! Thanxx doc Baek, I'm trying, I'm drinking a lot because it's so hot and I keep sweating 🤒 I tried watching some stuff but recently I can't focus, especially when my head was pounding, so I'm behind on EVERYTHING. I can't wait to go back to eating properly and not going to sleep at 10pm...

When will my Fever Diary arrive I need to lick the photos of Seonghwa in glasses also lil prairie boy I'm gonna kiss him 😭 and now another photobook?! KQ fucking knows I'm a sucker for Softeez ehhh, I don't have a concert to go to so might as well...

I'm gonna tell you about the second Hwa call soon, because it was unhinged 🙈🙉 but first I need to face ALL of them diuduehdhsjshdhdhdje

I got "sarcastic fan favourite" yeah sounds about right - DV 💖

hi hello!!

HDDJJD I DID TOO,,, omg i hope you’re better now bc wtf 😭😭😭🤚🏼 the respiratory system is in shambles but at least u drank more water hUh 🔫 none ghosties yet! but i THINK when i was recording the inn form the outside something waved in the video <3 but no one was outside the hotel or inside bc it was early morning <3 dbdbdb AYO????? HOW’D THAT GO ?? omg bestie??? drop ur itinerary riGHT NOW?? omg ur so coolio,,, love ur rewrite the stars yn??? but here is a sunset i captured dbdb hopefully the quality is there bc im gonna sob if not 🔫

I'm crying at that fan with the rose isuduwhdhshhsjsjshssg but this is cute

ME AT THEIR CONCERT FBWBDHEJ that’s so cute omg,,, manifesting this 🤲🏼

Baker Hwa just like in my dream wtf. Delinquent Hwa who uses the window to get to the snakcs first, imagine fighting him for strawberry milk

have u watched yumerio patisserie?? that au but with seonghwa 😭😭😭 ILL DRAFT IT OUT RN BDDB delinquent hwa who throws stones at windows so u look down and u see him standing their w ateez in their band instrumentals confessing his love to u <3 dbwnbdjks this was supposed to be in boxer hwa fbwbd FIGHTING OVER STRAWBERRY MILK FBWMDBWMHDKW

I got TWO POLAROIDS so far one Seonghwa and one Yunho! But Yunho went to my friend.

AAAA UR INTERACTIONS WAS SO WHOLESOME TEARD UP AND ALL TOO 😭😭🤚🏼 i am very afraid of what this new concert seonghwa will do. i will not survive. fbdnddb even if he’s wearing a fully dressed shirt i would have the absolute same reaction

HE WILL HAVE TOO !!! good luck indeed bdndhd 😭😭😭 i hope u get better soon bc that’s so messed up right after bronchitis 😭😭😭🤚🏼 hope ur travelling is better and ur all good when ur in malta !!! DROP ALL THE PRETTY PHOTOS PLS AND THANK YOU,, dOC BAEK DBDBDB

STOPPPPPP HE LOOKS SO FINE IN THOSE PHOTOS ITS A FRIENDS TO LOVERS AU 😭😭😩 BWSTIE STOP IM GONNA WRITE FOR HIM DBDBBD give him a fat smooch pls in both the photo books,,, but this photo omg??? he’s so pretty and the concept fits him so well 😭😭

I'm gonna tell you about the second Hwa call soon, because it was unhinged 🙈🙉 but first I need to face ALL of them diuduehdhsjshdhdhdje

PLS DO IM LOOKING FORWARD TO IT ALL, ALL OF THEM DBDBD HOW UNHINGED ON A SCALE OF 1 TO 10 WITH SEONGHWA VS OT8

I got "sarcastic fan favourite" yeah sounds about right - DV 💖

I DID TOO !!!! got some more quizzes one /// two

have you…have you heard from your uber driver recently?

😭😭😭

i would like to say, mr park

#✉️ : ask #dv 💖 anon

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many-gay-magpies · 2 years

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JINO WOULD SO BE THE TYPE TO JUST CASUALLY DROP “JOKES” LIKE THAT AND I THINK IT WOULD BE SO FUNNY BC LIKE . JAAN’S HEAD WOULD SNAP UP AND SHES TELEPATHICALLY SCREAM “ARE YOU FUCKING CRAZY” meanwhile jino’s just like “reeeelaaaax no one Actually thinks we were around back then” and oh god imagine him doing some contortionist shit during his night walks and scaring the soul out of some poor student on their way to the kitchen for instant noodles. he would be the Worst cryptid to run into. AND SOOHA AND JAAN FUCKING PEOPLE UP BUGS-BUNNY STYLE. I LOVE IT

i really love all these noa headcanons just . chef’s kiss. little menace to society noa carrying out not only his shenanigans but also others’- yet still being the sweet vulnerable little brother that sometimes needs a cuddle pile. sobs violently.

KDNWJDBE THE SUITCASE-SIZED TRAUMA WITH JUST A COIN PURSE OF BAGGAGE YOURE SO SO RIGHT. PLS LET SOOHA BE ACTUALLY TRAUMATIZED IT MAKES HER SO MUCH MORE INTERESTING. WEBNOVEL/COMIC SOOHA WOULD NEVER DARE TO EVEN THINK ABOUT BLACKMAILING THAT EMOTIONALLY CONSTIPATED LITTLE SHIT. AND THATS SAD BC SOLON NEEDS SOMEONE TO HUMBLE HIM AND SOMEONE TO THROW HIS OWN DEFENSIVE, LEARNED-BY-TRAUMA BEHAVIOR IN HIS FACE SO HE HAS A MOMENT LIKE “ah fuck, am i That insufferable to deal with?? fr??” BC HE SEES HIMSELF IN SOOHA WHEN THEY ARGUE

- vrvr anon

NO LITERALLY I THINK ALL THE BOYS WOULD BE AT DIFFERENT LEVELS OF COMFORTABLE ABOUT JOKING ABOUT THEIR IMMORTALITY TO OTHERS AND JAAN (and probably heli) AND JINO ARE AT OPPOSITE ENDS OF THE SCALE. like, jaan is (very rightfully) paranoid about the immortality "jokes" getting out and attracting the orphanage meanwhile jino sees all the immortality jokes that get made about keanu reeves and goes "huh that looks like fun" and proceeds to give half his family a heart attack. he's probably the type of closet vampire to regularly make comments about historical inaccuracies in history class because "i should know, i was there!!" (fully knowing he was only there for like 5% of the shit he corrects LMAO. hes just having fun with it!!)

WAITWAITWAIT IN TERMS OF JINO DOING WEIRD CONTORTIONIST SHIT FOR FUN. YOU KNOW THAT SPIDER-WALK THING? AND THE ONE GIRL THAT PRANKED PEOPLE BY DOING IT IN A GROCERY STORE? that but its jino and he just does it while going to the kitchen to get a snack one day because honestly why not, but unbeknownst to him theres another student in the kitchen and he scares the ever-living shit out of them lmao. they're probably gonna have three full nights of nightmares because of it

LITTLE MENACE TO SOCIETY NOA CARRYING OUT NOT ONLY HIS OWN SHENANIGANS BUT ALSO OTHERS', BUT STILL NEEDING A CUDDLE PILE WHEN HES SAD/HURT. IM CRYING WITH YOU ANON

YEAH THE TRAUMA MAKES HER INTERESTING!!! ur so right trauma makes characters SO fun to work with. like, examining how their past and the shit they went through effects even the littlest things about their character and behavior and how they react to certain situations? IMPECCABLE especially when you write them doing something in-character by complete accident and then when you read back over it later youre just like wait omg that makes so much sense. truly there is no better feeling

BUT AS FOR SOOHA YES the thought of solon being able to reflect on himself because he sees himself in her when they argue... sees little bits of his own trauma reflected in her... god that is some GOOD SHIT. people that bring out the worst in each other but like in a casual fun light-hearted healing way. and solon absolutely needs someone other than his brothers to humble him because, lets be honest, he's had literal centuries probably to get desensitized to his brothers' shit so they barely even count anymore. but when SOOHA does it he's like oh crap hello trauma. also sooha deserves to humble someone and give them shit <3 as a treat!

#asks #anon 📝#vrvr anon #dark moon nonsense #dark moon #dark moon universe

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darthkruge · 3 years

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hello lovely!! i’ve been getting back into star wars lately and i’ve been loving your fics!! and i was wondering if i could make a request?? sort of like,, anakin but he doesn’t turn to the dark side type thing?? like he maybe confesses he’s scared to lose you and you help him through it?? maybe obi wan helps out?? honestly you can take it however you want :)) ty ty

anakin skywalker x reader || rewritten

summary || a rots fix it fic where i take many liberties and give anakin a support system + everyone gets better communication and we think about how it would perhaps end differently

warnings || hella canon divergence, angst w/ a happy ending, some violence (non graphic and not super described)

words || 5.1k (i am legit shocked)

a/n || hello and thank you!! i’m so glad you’ve been loving my fics! this fic was honestly super challenging for me and it ended up being the longest thing i’ve ever written. i made some big changes and lots of smaller ones, but each one was fully intentional. i really, really hope y’all like it <3

main masterlist || anakin masterlist

gif credit

-----

Anakin awoke with a start, chest heaving and covered in sweat. He was gripping the blankets as he tried to ground himself, frantically looking around as if to discern between reality and the horrid dreamscape his mind created. He whipped his head to the side, visibly relaxing as he saw you staring up at him, a confused look on your face.

You were no stranger to Anakin’s nightmares but this one seemed unlike any he’d ever had. You slept curled into him and, thus, his jolt caused one of your own. Unsure if he wanted your touch just yet, you reached out to him with the Force. Panic, loss, grief, fear, terror, insecurity. You looked into his eyes, watching as they slowly cleared and he registered your presence. He blinked quickly, trying to clear the tears from his vision and gave you a slight nod.

Reaching a tentative hand to his shoulder, you suppressed a gasp as you felt him shudder beneath you. You quietly whispered his name and placed a finger under his jaw, guiding his face to yours. You nodded back at him and opened your arms in silent invitation. He crawled into your embrace as you pulled him impossibly close to you, situating yourself against the headboard so you could better wrap yourself around his shaking body. Choked sobs erupted from his lips, each one tearing a hole in your heart. As he finally let himself cry with his face buried into your neck, you held him. By the Maker, you held him.

He didn’t want to speak just yet and you understood. You’ve always extended the same respect back to him as he gives to you. Tucked into you, Anakin’s fingers squeezed into your flesh, as if trying to remind himself you were solid. You placed a few kisses into his soft hair and onto his forehead, hands running up and down his arms and back. You physically pressed reminders of your love into his skin for hours and, somewhere in the midst of your embrace, he let himself fall into a state of limbo. Unawake, unasleep, umoving, yet feeling everything you had to offer.

----

When morning came, you reached out once again. The emotions from last night were still evident, just not as strong. Simultaneously, you allowed a small smile to come to you as you felt something new. Warmth, comfort, love. You ran your fingers through Anakin’s hair to pull him to consciousness, needing to see his eyes. Stars, his eyes. While they were absolutely gorgeous, they also always gave him away. You once told him that. “Only for you, my love.” He’d replied.

“Hi.” He croaked out, meeting your gaze. Your eyes fluttered closed for a second as you took a deep breath in relief. His eyes were clear. You didn’t know how long the shadows would be banished for, but as long as they weren’t constant, you had hope.

“Hi, baby.” You whispered, allowing yourself to give him another forehead kiss, made easy by your position that you’d somehow remained in throughout the night. You looked at him expectantly and knew he knew what you were asking.

“You… you died,” Anakin started. His eyes were already filling with tears. “It wasn’t clear. There was so much blood. And you kept begging me to help you. You screamed and screamed and screamed and you were in agony and…”

You took his hand in yours, squeezing his fingers in encouragement to go on.

“I never- I never came for you.” He spit the words out as if they were venomous and shook his head. You could hear the self-hatred in his words, the way he couldn’t grasp the concept of hurting you, ever, and yet how seriously he took this.

“Hey, hey. Stop, my love.” You said, hoping to pull him out of his spiral. “You would never harm me, Anakin. You would come for me, you always have. That was a horrible dream and I’m so sorry you had to experience it. But it was just a dream, Anakin. It’s not real.”

He pulled away from you as if he couldn’t stand to feel your gentle touch. “No, no, no! It-” His words were cut off by his uneven breathing, his pulse racing as he relived the nightmare. “It felt like the ones I had about my mother. It felt… prophetic. I’m scared, Y/N, I can’t lose you.”

You walked over to him, placing your hands on his cheeks and rubbing your thumbs over his cheekbones, hoping to calm him. “You won’t. It takes a lot to kill me, you know? Especially when I have you by my side.”

Anakin nodded but you could tell he was unconvinced.

“How about you talk to Obi-Wan about the dreams? He’s always helped you before.” You suggested.

While normally this would be unthinkable, as it would expose your relationship, Anakin felt himself pulled toward the choice. Inwardly, he admitted that he could definitely use a friend right now. And Obi-Wan had always stood by him. Somehow, he just knew that now would be no different.

------

Obi-Wan easily swung the door open with the Force before Anakin even had a chance to knock. He knew his former Padawan’s force signature like the back of his hand and had sensed his distress for days. Unbeknownst to Anakin, Obi-Wan had canceled his missions due to this, wanting to stay close for when Anakin eventually came to him for guidance.

Obi-Wan looked up from his paperwork as he realized Anakin refused to come closer. Huddled behind the door frame, a conflicted and fearful look on his face, Obi-Wan was struck by how similar Anakin looked to the little boy he’d found on Tatooine all those years ago. Many nights, young Anakin would come into Obi-Wan’s room, plagued with nightmares. Just as before, Obi-Wan never turned him away.

“Something’s troubling you.”

Anakin sighed, taking a tentative step forward. “You know Master L/N?”

Obi-Wan smiled knowingly, having a sense of where this is going. “Yes, of course. A brilliant strategist, much like yourself.”

“I…. I’m involved with them, Master.”

“Involved?” Obi-Wan replied, with a quirked eyebrow.

“Please don’t punish Y/N for this, I know the Council frowns upon relationships. If you need to report it, I understand. But just report me, say they had nothing to do with it. But before you do anything please, Master, listen to what I must tell you. I wouldn’t unless it was absolutely necessary.” Anakin pleaded.

“Anakin, I know.”

“Yeah, I mean it truly is necessary-”

Obi-Wan placed a comforting hand on the younger Jedi’s shoulder. “You misunderstand. I mean, I know.”

Anakin’s eyes widened with realization before confusion filtered into his gaze. “But we were so careful!”

“Not as much as you would think,” Obi-Wan said with a slight laugh.

“And you’re not upset?”

He sighed. “Being honest, I was a bit at first. Anakin, you know the rules and you can be so reckless at times! But how could I fault you for your own humanity? And I knew who you were when I met you. I was always aware of your compassion, your capacity for emotions.” Anakin nodded and smiled, but the faraway look in his eye never wavered.

Clearing his voice, Obi-Wan continued. “Are you alright, Anakin?”

“No.” The strength of the word shocked them both and caused Anakin to take a moment to compose himself. “They’re dying.”

Panic flashed through Obi-Wan’s expression. “They’re what? What happened? Was it a mission? Do the medics know? Is-”

“- No, nothing… nothing yet. But it will.” While Obi-Wan didn’t exactly understand, he could tell through Anakin’s tone that his former Padawan believed this with his entire soul.

“I’ve been having more nightmares.” Anakin said.

“Like the ones with your mother?”

Anakin nodded, his gaze muddled as his mind wove through every possibility on how to save you. Coming up with none, he looked up quickly, the lost confusion clear.

“It’s going to be alright, Anakin. We’re going to do this together.” Obi-Wan offered, trying to comfort his friend. When Anakin nodded this time, his expression had more hope in it. Obi-Wan returned the gesture, tipping his head as Anakin walked out. Before Anakin reached the door, Obi-Wan called his name.

“Talk to me if you feel troubled. About anything, my friend. And just know… it’s okay to feel afraid. And you’re no less a Jedi because you love them. At least, not in my eyes.” For the first time since he’d walked in the room, Anakin gave a true smile. His former Master inhaled deeply, realizing after hearing those words, Anakin looked more like himself than he had in a long while.

-----

A few hours and a Council meeting later, Anakin walked back into your chambers, closing the door with a huff. He wasn’t enraged, per se, but definitely conflicted. You approached him cautiously, heart falling when you saw those familiar clouds back in his eyes.

“Did Obi-Wan not take it well?”

Anakin shook his head. “It’s not… he was supportive. But the Council has assigned something to me and…” He trailed off and looked at you. Only then did you see his bloodshot, puffy eyes.

“What did they ask of you, Anakin?” You questioned, coming behind him to gently massage his tense shoulders.

“I’m needed to spy on the Chancellor. Apparently there’s a Sith Lord somewhere in the Order. They suspect him.” He tried to keep his voice strong, but you could see how torn apart he was by the inflection in his tone.

You took a breath and tried to process the information. “Will you do it?”

“I don’t know… if the Council tells me I must, then I must. But the Chancellor has only been good to me. I worry about betraying him but I don’t want to let down the Order. I’m not sure how to do this without causing someone harm.” He confessed.

“They shouldn’t have put you in this position, it’s unfair. And you don’t have to, Ani. I know it feels like you do but you don’t need to bend to each of the Council’s requests. Whatever the fallout, whatever you choose, please know that I’m with you. And so is Obi-Wan. Not that it fixes anything, but at the very least, you’ll always have us.”

Anakin turned around so he was facing you. “I don’t know what to do.” He whispered, voice laced with hopelessness.

“Trust yourself. You have a good heart, intelligence, and strong morals. They’ve never failed you before.”

He nodded before leaning into you and your arms instinctively wrapped around him. Your fingertips found their way to his hair, gently weaving through the golden strands.

“We’ll get through this, yeah?” While it was a question, you both knew you meant it as a statement.

“We’ll get through this.” Anakin echoed. He mumbled the words into your neck where he had buried his face. As if the words could seep into your skin. As if the hope could find its way to your heart and stay there, ever protected, ever true.

-----

The next day, Anakin found himself in Palpatine’s office. He was wary, guarded. It was evident by the look on his eyes, the way he took a moment before taking another step. It was his training as both a Jedi and a General that allowed him to do this. The careful complexity of planning every move.

“I heard the Council debating whether or not they should have made you a Master. It seems they do not trust you or value your talent as they should.” Palpatine’s words made Anakin freeze. Rationally, he knew this was wrong. At the very least, Obi-Wan trusts him and so do you. But there was a part of him that felt so validated by the Chancellor’s words that he wanted to hear more. To bask in them, in feeling wanted and appreciated. He hated himself for it.

“I… I’m not sure what you mean by this.” Anakin attempted not to give himself away any more than he already has.

“Well, they care about your potential. But they hold you back. They’ll never show you your true power, for they don’t want you to understand. They just wish to use it, no matter your own fate.”

“I feel cast aside. Like I don’t matter.” Anakin wasn’t even sure why he shared these words. Somehow, in feeling so praised, the doubts just bubbled their way to the surface. He felt like a child in these moments, so painfully fragile.

“You don’t. Not to them, Anakin. But with me I can teach you your power. I can teach you the ways of the Dark Side. I know of your fears, of those nightmares that plague you. I know about your secret marriage and how close you are to losing it all.”

Anakin froze, his heart hammering in his chest. His thoughts raced as he tried to piece together the truth from all the lies. The mentions of Darth Plagueis. The Dark Side of the Force.

“You’re the Sith Lord!” Anakin said, igniting his lightsaber and pointing it at the older man’s chest.

Palpatine bowed his head slightly, a small smile gracing his lips. “Well done, my boy.” Anakin felt sick as he noted the pride in his tone. And yet that aching part inside him still swelled, ever so slightly.

“Now, don’t do anything rash.” The Chancellor reasoned. “Only the Dark Side can save the one you love.”

Anakin wanted to do the right thing. He wished to be the one who could stand up and arrest Palpatine without a single ounce of guilt or regret. But as soon as Palpatine mentioned you, it’s like all his logic disappeared. He just wanted to save you, to not fail you as he’d failed his mother. But then he thought back to your words. “Strong morals.” And to his Master’s. “We’ll do this together.”

“I’m turning you into the Council.”

“Wouldn’t you prefer to kill me?”

“Yes.” Anakin’s remark was forceful and clipped with anger.

“Then do it. Give yourself over to your wrath.”

He felt himself burning with betrayal, with resentment toward both sides. Even so, he could still tell right from wrong, selfless from selfish. And whatever Palpatine was doing… it certainly did not have the will of the people in mind. Without so much as deigning him with another response, Anakin turned and walked out of the room.

“If you turn me in, you’ll never save them!” Anakin tried to will Palpatine’s voice out of his head as he ventured back to the Council chambers. When he arrived back, he decided to slightly alter his plans. While he knew he must face all of them eventually, he wanted to talk to Obi-Wan first. Perhaps his Master could give him guidance, like he did about your nightmares.

“General Skywalker… are you alright?” Anakin stumbled as he walked right into another figure, too caught up in his own head.

“I’m fine, Master Windu. Thank you- I’m sorry.” Mace looked at the younger Jedi with an unreadable expression. While there was much in his eyes, concern was definitely a part of it.

“Have you seen Master Kenobi?” Anakin said after a brief pause for composure.

“He’s supposed to leave for his next mission any moment now. If you hurry, you can probably still catch him.”

Anakin thanked Master Windu before taking off in a run. No matter how fast his legs carried him, he felt his mind was working even faster, the internal conflict brewing more intently by the second.

-----

Obi-Wan opened the door as soon as before Anakin could even knock. He looked at Anakin and gestured at a vacant chair, a silent invitation to sit. Anakin shook his head quickly. The younger Jedi’s eyes were scattered and conflicted, as if he’d been shaken to his very core.

“Palpatine is the Sith Lord.” The words came out rushed, yet clear. As if Anakin needed to get them out as quickly as he could but replayed them in his head until they were all he knew. The intensity showed Obi-Wan that there was no doubt in his friend’s mind.

Obi-Wan blinked. “Okay.” He stroked his beard, trying to find the words to say. “Are you alright?”

Anakin looked at Obi-Wan in confusion. Certainly there were more important questions his former Master would want to ask than that.

“I know you and the Chancellor were close. This can’t be easy for you. I just wanted to ask if you were alright.”

“I’m not sure.” Anakin said after some hesitation. “I don’t really know what to think… Palpatine is evil, right? But he believed in me when no one else did. He saw my potential, allowed me to confide in him. He told me he could show me how to save Y/N. Would someone evil do that?”

Obi-Wan’s eyes softened as he looked at the painfully conflicted young man in front of him. “Anakin… he was manipulating you. He was isolating you so you had no one to turn to but him. It was a tactic, a ploy. He doesn’t care for you.” Anakin looked so heartbroken that Obi-Wan knew Anakin believed him. “I’m so sorry.”

“But what about Y/N?” Anakin asked desperately.

Obi-Wan sighed. “Loving someone in the Order isn’t easy. Especially after everything you’ve gone through. And losing someone… it changes the way you love. You fear constantly, wondering when your love will evade you. When it will fall apart, like all the rest. But living like that, loving like that… it leaves no room for growth or peace. And that’s what relationships are for, aren’t they?” His voice was filled with compassion and wisdom. From experience, perhaps? Regardless of the reason, Anakin was reminded that someone did understand him. Despite the circumstances, he felt content. At least a bit.

“Is there any way to save them?”

“I’m not sure. Let’s focus on Palpatine for now, alright? And we’ll bring Master L/N with us so you know they’re safe.” Obi-Wan wished nothing more than having a set solution to save Y/N. But some things were even out of his grasp. “I know this must be impossible for you, Anakin. I truly am sorry.”

Anakin nodded. After all, it was true. If there was anything to describe the impending threat of losing another person he loved, impossible summed up the process. “I know. You’re doing all you can. Thank you, Master. And yes, I would like to bring them with us.”

Obi-Wan clasped a hand to Anakin’s shoulder, giving it a reassuring squeeze as they met each other with a smile. “I’ll send them a message right now.”

----

You gasped when you received Obi-Wan’s message with the details of the Supreme Chancellor’s truth. Your heart cried for Anakin, knowing the betrayal must be breaking him. All you could do was wish that with Obi-Wan’s help, the two of you could support Anakin until he felt like he could breathe again. And you had faith in him. You always had faith in him.

Grabbing your cloak, you jogged to Obi-Wan’s quarters. As soon as you opened the door, you ran to Anakin and hugged him to you, needing to feel his presence. Somehow, you knew he needed it, too.

“Ready?” Anakin and Obi-Wan gave you nods of confirmation and you gave a tentative smile. “Alright. Let’s do this.”

-----

Anakin entered Palpatine’s chambers first. For once, he felt sure of himself. He finally knew what he had to do. His gaze shifted to you, making sure you were alright. You placed a hand on his arm, rubbing your thumb up and down to reassure him. He inhaled. Exhaled. And ignited his saber.

“I knew you’d come back, Skywalker. I knew you’d join me.”

“Think again.” Obi-Wan responded as you and him walked into the chambers. Pure, unfiltered rage flickered through Palpatine’s eyes in response.

“Anakin, they’re trying to corrupt you. They’re trying to keep your power. Come with me, boy, and I’ll teach you all you wish to know. I’ll teach you how to save them.” He said, pointing a pale finger toward your face.

You let out a sharp breath as you suddenly understood Anakin’s conflict. Of course Palpatine was using you as a bargaining chip. Using Anakin’s fear of abandonment, of losing his loved ones against him. It was disgusting, even for a Sith.

“I… you can’t possibly know how to do that. It’s impossible!”

“Not on the Dark Side. Look… Obi-Wan has turned them against you. He’s the cause of this! I’m sure he didn’t even pose a solution to saving Y/N. It’s because he doesn’t care about you, not like I do.”

The shadows returned to Anakin’s eyes as his gaze switched between Obi-Wan and Palpatine. He couldn’t even bring himself to look at you, to see the pain in your eyes as he struggled with a choice that for others would be so simple. He hated himself for being weak but he truly couldn’t fathom losing you.

Obi-Wan stepped forward, backing Palpatine against the wall and pointing his lightsaber at Palpatine’s throat. Anakin stepped back, too frozen to move, and unconsciously placed himself between them and you.

“It’s over, Chancellor. Don’t make this more difficult than it already is.” Obi-Wan said.

Palpatine shot lightning from his hands, causing Obi-Wan to deflect the matter with his lightsaber, redirecting it to Palpatine himself. As Palpatine shook from the force of his own blast, he once again called to Anakin.

“If you let him kill me, dear boy, Y/N will die. If you don’t try to save them, you will be the cause of their death.”

Anakin’s eyes widened, those words hitting him right in the chest. He moved forward, pointing his lightsaber at Obi-Wan but refusing to make the final cut to end his life. Obi-Wan looked like he wanted to speak but the effort of holding of Palpatine’s lightning rendered him useless. It was Obi-Wan, after all. His former Master, his friend. The one person who he trusted with the secret of his marriage. He couldn’t kill him, right? He faltered, stepping slightly back.

“Ani,” You said, your voice calm as you tried to reason with him. “Ani if you do this, you can’t come back from it. I know you don’t want to lose me and if you kill Obi-Wan, you will, regardless of the fate of my life. You aren’t too far gone, yet. You haven’t done anything irredeemable. Remember who you are, my love.”

Anakin heard your words and looked at your face. You. He wanted to do good by you, to do good by all of them. He wanted to make his mother proud, make himself feel like leaving her for the Jedi Order meant something. And then his gaze filtered over to his friend. Obi-Wan stood tall against the force of Palpatine’s lightning, reminding Anakin of his friend’s strength. It was something Anakin wanted to emulate, too.

Understanding his choice, Anakin took a step forward to position the blade toward Palpatine’s chest. His hand was shaking, movements unsure, eyes glossed over with immeasurable pain. But before he could make contact, you swiftly moved in front of him and killed Palpatine instead. Obi-Wan was thrust backward as the lightning ceased, chest heaving as he tried to catch his breath.

“Why would you do that?” Anakin asked as he looked at you.

“I didn’t want you to have to kill your friend. No matter what he turned out to be.” You said as you shifted on the balls of your feet. The weight of Palpatine’s death now weighed on your soul, as do those of every life you’ve ever ended. You could bear it and you knew Anakin was strong enough to do so, as well. You just didn’t want him to have to.

Anakin nodded and whispered a thank you back to you. You just smiled, the love for him clear in your expression. Anakin turned around, walking to his friend and extending a hand for him.

“I never doubted you.” Obi-Wan said simply as he met Anakin’s guilty eyes.

“I should have made the choice to believe you earlier. I shouldn’t have let him get to me. I’m sorry, Master.”

“Look at me, Anakin. We all struggle with our morals. We struggle and we’re unsure and we pray and hope to land on the right decision. And you did. You have nothing to apologize for.” Looking at your and Anakin’s arms around each other, Obi-Wan made one last decision. “How about the two of you retire for the evening? I’ll debrief with the Council, you’ve been through enough.”

Once again, Anakin was struck by the older Jedi’s strength and selflessness. He nodded, as did you, before he accompanied you back to your quarters.

----

You kept one arm around Anakin’s waist the entire way home, mirroring his that was around your shoulders. You couldn’t bear to separate, not after the events of the past few days. Seeing Anakin so torn up inside, it was eating away at you. Knowing you couldn’t save him was one of the hardest things you’ve ever had to deal with.

Now, Palpatine was finally gone. There was no more threat to the Jedi Order, the Force once again balanced. But both of you still understood the one solution that hadn't been found: how to save you. It made everything easier, that you chose to kill the Chancellor. Anakin refused to voice the doubts in his head, wondering if he actually would have gone through with it knowing he would lose his chance at saving you.

The air was melancholic surrounding you both. Heavy. Neither of you knew what to say, words failing in a moment that was so conflicted it almost overwhelmed you. But your heart warmed as you saw Anakin scamper in front of you to open and hold the door for you. You loved him so much, for doing the little things even in moments like these. It gave you hope.

You were okay with death, so long as it only affected you. When you joined the Jedi, you had to make your peace with it. But after you fell in love everything changed. You didn’t want Anakin to go through the pain of losing you. He’d been so open with you about, well, everything. Especially his past. He’d gone through so much, felt such raw pain and loss, you didn’t want to add to that.

Taking his hands in yours, you looked into his blue eyes.

“I don’t want you to die.” He whispered, the desperate, deflated tone making your heart break. “I won’t.” You wished to say, but you knew you couldn’t.

“I don’t want to die, either.” You chose these words instead, relying on their honesty.

“Palpatine could have saved you.” Anakin said after a beat.

You sighed. “You don’t know that.” You stated, knowing it wouldn’t change how he felt.

“Neither do you!”

“But at what cost? At the cost of losing your soul? Anakin, you would have had to join the Sith! That’s no longer you! You’re good and you couldn’t have saved me if you were there, don’t you see that?” You pleaded. You wished he would see your logic, the truth behind your words. How even though he thought otherwise, he made the right decision.

“What good is saving the Order if you won’t be a part of it?”

“What good is saving my life if I wouldn’t have you to live it with?” You countered.

Anakin let out an exhausted breath before pulling you into him, hugging you. The fighting was too much and, frankly, he didn’t want to argue. Not with you, not ever. You both let out a humorless chuckle as you leaned into each other.

“I love you.” His tone conveyed it all.

“I love you.” You replied, your voice muffled from being pressed into his robes.

“Can we sleep? I don’t want to face this right now. Can we just put this aside, if just for a moment? Can I lay with you and can you hold me and can we just have each other?” You questioned breathlessly.

“I would like nothing more, my love.” He smiled slightly and pressed a kiss to your head as he added the words of endearment, wanting you to understand he wasn’t upset with you. You already knew that, though. You were in love with Anakin Skywalker. Of course you’d argue from time to time. But at the end of the day, you were two hopelessly in love Jedi just trying to save each other.

Crawling into bed, sleep came for the both of you quickly. You were holding him and he was holding you, tangled together as you nestled his warm embrace. He tucked his face into your neck as you did so and savored the feel of you next to him. Safe.

Drifting off, Anakin tried to fight the pull of sleep, knowing he’d just suffer from another nightmare like he had every day since the first one. One where you’d die and he could do nothing to stop it. Amidst these tumultuous thoughts, his breathing evened, lulling him under.

You were in the grass, a flower crown atop your head. Anakin was leaning against a small house. It was quaint but beautiful. Small, not outwardly flashy, but full of love and meaning. Looking around, he smiled as he saw green vines crawling up the sides of the house, a garden of your favorite flowers out front. You always had a soft spot for that.

We are on Naboo, he realized. It was peaceful. It was the dream you always talked of together. Anakin’s breath caught as he felt the certainty of this dream. It felt just like his nightmares, except this one left him content. He didn’t want to entertain the thought for too long, afraid of jinxing it. But he knew it was prophetic. He wasn’t sure how he changed his fate, what exactly gave him this future. Something inside him just knew that when he wakes up the next morning, all will be okay. He felt infinitely lighter as he understood the threat was gone.

When you looked up and saw him, you raced toward him and jumped into his arms. Anakin stumbled but caught you, breathing in your scent as you kissed the side of his neck. As he held you, his thoughts slightly wandered. But he was grounded by your presence, reminding him that you were safe and he was okay. With you, he was finally, completely, home.

-----

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v1olentdelights · 3 years

Text

I Just Wanted to Live a Little

Pairing: George Weasley x fem!reader, Fred Weasley x Sister-in-law!fem!reader

Summary: The war was ruthless, death doesn't care. It takes, and it takes, and it takes. George didn’t know if he would be okay ever again.

Trigger Warnings: Major character death, mentions of being married, mentions of being pregnant, this is a real tear-jerker.

A/N: Hello loves, this was such a hard, but amazing write. :) thank you @untowardflower for revising! And also thank you @simpology for letting me write this!! Please go check out my besties page!!

Your love was replaceable. Though that thought hurt, it was completely true. So when you saw Fred staring wide-eyed at the rubble about to fall and kill him, there wasn’t a second thought. You turned from your current duel with some death eater and pushed Fred out of the way. However Fred was horrified, because he knew you wouldn’t make it. There was no way. He could only stand and watch as it fell upon you. Your pained face. He was losing a sister, and George was losing a fiancé.

.•°☆°•.☆.•°☆°•.☆.•°☆°•.☆.•°☆°•.☆.•°☆°•.☆.•°☆°•.☆.•

George could live without you. You were simply an addition to his life, but Fred? He couldn’t live without Fred, there in fact was never a day where they were not around each other. Sure sometimes they would fight with each other, or they just couldn’t stand each other. But at the end of the day they loved each other, there was almost nothing that could sever that bond. But you and George, well he had lived a life before you. And you were sure he could again.

Finishing off the death eater that was eyeing you and him he saddled up to your side as the tears began to build up in his eyes.

“Y/N! Why would you do that…. You are so stupid.” he whimpered out over your already weakening figure.

“Because he can’t live without you Freddie.” you looked into his eyes.

“He can’t live without you, I mean he asked you to marry him for Merlin’s sake!”

“We both know that’s not true.” you reach out your unpinned hand weakly latching on to his. “Fred, I need you to tell George something for-”

“No you are gonna do it yourself, I am gonna get you out of this.” he said with a panicked face beginning to pull rocks off of you, some too big or heavy to move.

“I will” his voice came out barely there, he almost sounded like you.

“Fred.” He turned back to you. “Fred, I need you to tell Georgie that I am not afraid to die, just wish I could live a little first. And your gonna tell him that he should move on, I don’t want him to stay stuck on me forever alright?” He sits there taking in your words. “Answer me Fredrick, I have to know you are gonna do this.”

“Y/N?” George had asked you in the library one evening. You had been studying and he wanted to start a conversation, though he knew who you were. He played dumb.

Knowing you held on long enough to get your message across, you let yourself let go. Simply smiling at the boy you were happy to call your brother.

“I love you Fred, take care of him for me.”

“George she’s gone.” George rushed over grabbing Fred by his collar holding him up.

“Yes?” You answered him quietly.

“Y/N?” George had now asked 5 years later, this time to his brother. Fred had come up to the one eared boy staring at him with so much pain in his eyes.

“Yes,” he replied quietly.

“No, no you must have got it wrong. She can’t be gone, I was going to marry her. She isn’t gone.”

“YOU’RE LYING! SHE ISN’T GONE!! DON’T LIE TO MY FRED THIS-” choking back a sob he let go and fell to the ground. Fred slides down in front of him holding him together. He then let out a scream so excruciating that the kindest sweetest hearts shattered. And even the coldest of hearts broke.

His only love, the single person he didn’t want to live without was gone. And he couldn’t undo it. There was no way to bring you back, he couldn’t say I love you one last time. All the chances were taken from him, you would never bear his kid, you and him would never officially get married. There was no way for you to grow old together, you were so young. Now your story would be told, but not together. Molly came waddling over holding onto Ginny. Soon enough George was enveloped in a Weasley cave. No one knew what it felt like. There were no words, simply the reassurance that no matter what they would be there.

**** **** **** **** **** ****

“Because when I open my eyes this will all turn out to be a dream and I'll lose you again.”

There you were sitting on the porch stairs watching the sun rise while holding a steaming cup of coffee. Something George never understood. He thought you looked gorgeous all wrapped up in his old Quidditch sweater with the slightest bit of sunlight shining over your face and bare legs. He was never one to shy away from telling you how gorgeous you are. But right now he didn’t think he could form words, you looked absolutely ethereal.

“You look stunning.” his deep gruffly voice interrupted your thoughts. Simply smiling at him you extend a hand. Taking it he comes to sit next to you and kisses your knuckles lightly. Resting your head on his shoulder, you take in life.

“I never thought I could have this. There is something so… surreal about this life I have with you.” He pressed his lips to the top of your head.

“I wish we had this.” you sighed, smiling. He shook his head agreeing, but then he picked up what you said fully.

“What do you mean ‘I wish’? We do have this. Right here right now.” He said placing his hand over your swollen stomach.

“Georgie, you know that’s not true.” You smiled at him sweetly “I’m not here anymore, remember?”

He let his mind run in circles thinking for possible explanations, until his mind landed on one. But he didn’t want it to be true, so it wasn’t and it never happened. Ignoring your comment he pulled you up walking back in the house.

“Get dressed my love, I want to take you somewhere.” He smiled before pulling you into a sweet kiss. You and George had lived in a small cottage not far from the burrow, but still far enough. George was dressed in a pair of some linen pants you had bought him and a loose button up shirt. While you were dressed in a flowy yellow sundress that hugged you in the most perfect ways, showing off your stomach.

“Let's go darling.” He had led you out to a beautiful lake not far from your home. Laying out the blanket under a big beautiful tree he set out your brunch. He had spent a good amount of the time reading from The Tales of Beedle and Bard while you laid against his chest.

“Oh Georgie, can we go over there to the gazebo?”

Helping you up, you both walked over and pulled out the muggle invention Hermione gave him a while back. A cell phone, which he hadn’t figured out much, and put on some slower music. Turning back to you with a smirk he wrapped you in his arms and began dancing slowly, taking in every minute.

“I love you Georgie.” you whisper, kissing his chest before pulling back slightly. “But it’s time to go darling.”

“No I don’t want to.” he huffed defiantly. His stubbornness was something you loved so deeply about him.

“Honey please, they all need you. Why won’t you go back?” he looked down at you with a pained face.

And that’s how he wakes up, with his hand over his heart and tears in his eyes.

“Oh honey, I know. I’m so sorry but you have to go. I know it’ll hurt but with time it will get better. Okay?” You said trying to pull away but he held on tighter.

“Can we- can we just stay here for a bit longer? Please?” His voice was coming out shattered and hurt, the tears fell upon your face.

“A moment longer my love.” you resumed laying your head on his chest

“I love you Y/N, and I wish I had the chance to tell you that one last time. I wish I could tell you everything and I just.. I don’t know how to live without you.”

Taglist: @el-imaskingforyourlefthand @aspensworlds

“You don’t really have to. I will always be right here.” You put your hand over his heart.

.•°☆°•.☆.•°☆°•.☆.•°☆°•.☆.•°☆°•.☆.•°☆°•.☆.•°☆°•.☆.•

#tw death #tw mentions of pregnancy #tw mentions of marriage #george weasley x reader #george weasley x y/n #george weasley imagine #george wealsey angst #heart break #fred weasley x sister!reader #fred weasley x reader #fred weasley angst #harry potter imagine #the wizarding war #grace writes

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celestialrry · 3 years

Text

nerves

4.8k

HELLLLO IM WRITING THIS INTRO AND POSTING THIS WHILE FALLING ASLEEP SO ILL POST ALL THE DETAILS ADN ADD THIS TO MU MASTERLIST LATER I LOVE TOU ALL THANK YOU FOR FOLOWING AND REBLOGGIN KISSES FOT YOU ALL (this is like right after release of hs1 harry I think hope you enjoy mwah)

summary: Actress!Y/N goes onto a talk show, and the host has a surprise for her.

warnings: cursing, kinda sorta an anxiety attack?

Y/N was nervous.

This would only be the 5th talk show she’s ever gone on alone after being in the spotlight for a few years when her acting career took off. She started off with indie films and soon made her way to the red carpet, working with esteemed actors and actress’s she could only ever dream of meeting. It was pure bliss.

Of course, fame came with other struggles like hate from the media and random people on twitter, but at the end of the day she was so grateful she had the opportunity to be in the business. She loved getting into a character, finding out what makes them click, and fully emerging herself in whatever film she’s in. At the moment, she was promoting her new film, and being the lead, she had gone on a few talk show’s by herself, but they never failed to make her sick to her stomach. Having no one to turn to when it gets awkward, even not having body heat by her side in front of a live audience and a professional host made her body rack with goosebumps.

“Miss L/N?”

Her head turned towards the door of the dressing room she had been sitting in for 15 minutes alone, trying to get her nerves down. “Yes?’ She responded flashing a forced smile to the assistant standing in the door way. “They’re ready for you.” She nodded her head and stood up, brushing the non-existent dust off her long dress and tumbled a bit on her heels to follow the assistant that was already walking towards the side stage.

They instructed her to wait until her name was called, then walk onto stage and take a seat and have the show progress. So Y/N stood there, biting her bottom lip that was coated with clear gloss and her arms crossed around her waist, her heel covered toe tapping the floor in anticipation.

“Now welcome our very special, and gorgeous guest, Y/N L/N!” She heard Jimmy Kimmel announce and took a short breath before stepping through the automatically opening curtains. She smiled and waved at the people sitting in the audience, happy to see people supporting her, and greeted Jimmy before taking a seat on the loveseat closest to his desk.

“Y/N! Welcome, how are you feeling tonight?” He flashed a comforting smile at her.

She chuckled a bit due to her inability to not laugh in uncomfortable situations. “I’ll be honest with you Jimmy,” She said, adjusting herself in the seat. “M’ pretty nervous.”

“Nervous?” He asked. “Now, why would 2 time Emmy Nominee Miss Y/N L/N be nervous?” Jimmy teased.

Her eyes fell to the floor and her cheeks heated up before looking back at him. “Because,” She dragged out. “It’s always nerve-racking being on live TV.”

He just nodded and made a joke about feeling the same even though he does this every week.

“How are you feeling tonight?” She asked.

He smiled before resting his arms on his desk. “I’m feeling good, I have a surprise for you later, but I’m supposed to ask the questions now, will you let me?”

“Of course I will.” She smiled back.

Y/N met Jimmy the first year she really became “famous” and he had always been her favorite late-night talk show host just because he was never invasive or creepy. Her standards for hosts were quite low at this point. They continued on, promoting her new movie and such before he settled back in his seat.

“So.” He said.

“So.” She said back, raising a brow.

“I hate to ask you this, but I honestly am curious myself,” He began, and her anxiety creeped up just a bit. “Now, we dug through your old interviews, and it seems in every single one, when asked if you had a celebrity crush, your answer was Harry Styles?”

She simply nodded, her cheeks heating up again, and a small smile creeping onto her face at his name.

“I see that smile, Y/N.” Jimmy said, and she let out a laugh, her smile now wide.

“So, do you mind telling us why you like him so much, or should I say love him so much?” His brow raised.

Y/N laughed a bit more, just at her nerves, and took a breath. “Um, he’s always been such an inspiration for me to actually chase my career, I mean I knew him from when he was on X-Factor to be honest. Binged that show all the time when I was in middle school and to see a boy just 2 years older than me just go straight into being in one of the biggest boy-bands in the world was insane. He’s just so passionate about what he does and I admire him for that. Uh- from what I can tell he’s just very charming, sweet, funny, caring, and…” She trailed off her rant, biting her bottom lip just a tad.

“And?”

“He’s incredibly attractive.” She finished a smile on her face as she glanced at the floor again.

“Understandable. I think he’s a good looking man myself, met him a few times and got flustered,” Jimmy jokes before looking at Y/N. “What if I told you he was the surprise I had for you?”

Her brows furrow as she looks at the man sitting across from her. “What? Do you mean like a video-” She feels a tap on her shoulder.

Y/N turns around, still massively confused, and then she sees him.

Harry standing in a simple black suit and white button up, only a few of the buttons actually buttoned and her jaw drops. “Hello.” He says, smiling at her.

Her eyes are wide and she looks like a dear in headlights before her face falls into her hands, elbows resting on her knees, her breath erratic. “No, this isn’t- no. He’s not here.” She says into her hands and the crowd laughs. Everyone laughs.

“M’a bit offended you think I’m not really here, love.” Harry grins, and she pulls her face out of her shaking hands to see him.

She opens her mouth to say something and nothing comes out.

Harry Styles, her celebrity crush since the ripe age of 14, a crush thats lasted 8 years being 22 now, and she’s only seen him on screens her entire life. “Fuck.” Was all she can say. He laughs a bit at her starstruck appearance and turns to Jimmy. “She’s not normally like this, right?”

“Right.” The host jokes, looking back at the girl on the couch, and his smile diminishes a bit. Her eyes are watering and she’s trying to keep her composure but her bottom lip is trembling and Jimmy’s now worried he’s about to have a sobbing woman on live TV.

“You okay Y/N?” Jimmy asks and her head quickly turns to him and then back to Harry. “I-fuck, I’m sorry.” She tries to laugh it off. Tries not to think about how the man she’s loved even before she knew what love truly was, was standing in front of her right now.

“Don’t be sorry.” Harry says, slightly frowning but trying to keep a happy face. He’s standing in front of a girl he’s adored ever since he watched her first movie, for Christs sake, and she’s silently about to break down in front of him, because of him.

Before he can even properly introduce himself, she’s standing on her heels, wobbling a bit, and looking up at him. “Can I hug you?” She mouths, not wanting her question to be picked up on the mic on the back of her dress and before her mouth even closes he’s stepping towards her, big arms wrapping around her waist. Her arms find their way around his chest and her head is resting on his shoulder and her eyes are squeezed shut and she’s mouthing “Oh my fucking god. Oh my god.” Without realizing she’s facing the audience who laugh at her inability to not fangirl. His head dips as he hugs her, reveling in her touch, and then she’s pulling away, remembering they’re on live TV and she can give him a proper hug backstage after this is over when they don’t have to worry about appearances.

She’s still reeling when his hands slide off her waist and he sticks his hand out and says “It’s so nice to meet you.” She takes his calloused hand in hers and says “Same to you.” Blinking away unshed tears.

“Shall we sit then?” He asks and she looks at Jimmy admiring the moment before back at Harry. “You’re staying?” She blurts out before shutting her mouth abruptly.

“If you want me too.” He grins that grin she’s always been infatuated by and she nods, maybe too quickly. “Of course I do- yes,” She coughs. “Yeah, uh, please, let’s.”

They both plant themselves on the loveseat, Y/N taking the spot in which she was before and Harry sitting on the other end, keeping a distance between the two. She recomposes herself and sits up. Harry looks at her for a moment before looking back at Jimmy.

“How are y’Jimmy?” He asks.

“I’m doing well, proud of myself for inviting you, you’re the one person I’ve seen make Y/N go absolutely speechless here,” Jimmy jokes and Y/N groans and smiles, leaning her top half on the arm of the chair, her face in her hands before sitting back up. “How about you, Harry?”

“M’doing well, was very excited to see Y/N here and I’d hopefully say it’s the same for her.” He smiles looking at her, dimples flashing.

“Yeah!” Her voice squeaks. “You’re right. It’s the same for me. I-” She cut’s herself off from saying she’s shitting her pants at the moment. Figuratively, of course, but it’s not very appropriate. She still can’t believe this. Twitter is going to have a field day talking about how flustered Y/N was at this moment.

“Have something you want to say, Y/N? To Harry, more specifically?” Jimmy asks.

“Um,” She begins, locking eyes with Harry. “Did you hear, what I said, um, before you walked out here?”

The green eyed man nods.

Her hands start shaking again and she awkwardly laughs. “I’m sorry you heard that.” She apologizes.

“Why are you apologizing?” Harry asks her, tilting his head and Y/N was going to pass out. “I’m glad you think all those things about me, plus, it’s a nice ego booster to hear that you think I’m ‘incredibly attractive’.” He chuckles a bit, but truthfully he was happy his celebrity crush feels the same way about him.

She just laughs back and mumbles a “Thanks.” Before Jimmy starts up a conversation about whatever was going on at the moment.

Jimmy and Harry start talking about something and Y/N nods her head and laughs when it’s appropriate but she couldn’t process anything. Her hands were interlocked, shaking in her lap, and all she could feel was Harry. Harry sitting next to her, Harry breathing next to her, Harry waving his hands around while he spoke in front of her. It was all too much.

Suddenly his knee lightly knocked against her own. She abruptly turned to look at him, but he was still looking at Jimmy. So she assumed it was a mistake, until it happened again, and this time when her eyes looked to him, his met her’s and he gently and subtly moved closer to their thighs were touching. Y/N let the leg that was crossed over her other relax and fall to the couch, only her ankles crossed, and she swore she could hear his breath stop for a moment, but it was too quiet to be sure.

A few moments after they both had gained the courage to barely revel in each others touch, Jimmy was ending the show. Y/N doesn’t remember what she said or did before the camera cut off, she vaguely remembers waving to the audience but she’s not completely sure.

And then it’s over- just like that.

“This was so fun Jimmy, thank you for inviting me on.” Harry said, standing up (reluctantly) and going to give Jimmy a hug. Y/N on the other hand was watching the interaction and it all hit her like a wave again. Harry fucking Styles was standing in front of her. The men both turn to her as she stands up and she gives a weak smile and mumbles “I forgot I needed to text my assistant, m’sorry I’ll be back.” before speed walking behind the curtain and booking it to her dressing room. She quickly flips the “Do Not Disturb” side of the sign on the door to show and closes the door behind her, her breathing accelerating.

She barely makes it to the couch before bursting out in tears.

Y/N couldn’t really put a finger on whether or not they were tears of joy, sadness, embarrassment, or a combination of all 3. She’s pretty sure it’s the latter though. She slips her heels off and lies on the couch, her hands over her face with not so silent cries as she tries to calm herself.

Meanwhile, both Harry and Jimmy sensed that Y/N wasn’t just going to text her assistant. “Do you think- do you think I said something maybe?” Harry quietly asks the late night host as they walk behind the curtain and into a quieter hallway backstage. Jimmy simply shakes his head before locking eyes with Harry. “Have you seen any of the videos where she talks about you, Harry?”

He shakes his head no and the older man pulls out his phone, doing a quick scroll of his email before finding video file and opening it. “A couple of interns here made this combination of all the times she talked about you in her interviews.”We were gonna play it as you were coming out but her manager said it would be too embarrassing.” Was the only preface Jimmy gave before clicking play.

Y/N stood in an elegant emerald colored gown just off the red carpet, all done up for her first big movie premiere. An interviewer stands in front of her, holding a mic that the woman was moving between herself and Y/N. “So Miss L/N, we need some juicy secrets from the “It-Girl” herself. Who’s your celebrity crush?” Y/N looks at the floor, a shy smile on her face as the quietly says “Harry Styles.” The interviewer’s eyes widen and she chuckles a bit. “I feel you honey, what do you like most about him?” Y/N purses her lips slightly before speaking again. “Um, everything? I think he has a really good heart.” The interviewer makes a joke about how she likes his eyes instead and Y/N laughs, but anyone could tell it was forced.

The screen begins to play another clip.

Y/N is sitting on a couch with her co-stars of a movie she did a year ago, dressed in a classy blush colored suit, and they’re all playing a game with some other talk show host. “Let’s see who knows Y/N the best now, shall we?” The host asks, and looks down at the cards in his hand. “Who is her celebrity crush?” And almost immediately all of her friends were jotting down their answers on a white board. “That was fast,” The host laughs, as does everyone else. “Okay everyone, flip it around.” ‘Harry Styles’ was written on every single board. “Oh my god.” She smiles wide out of embarrassment and puts her face in her hands.

It reminds Harry of what she did when she first saw him.

“Y/N! Looks like you’re absolutely smitten with Harry Styles, aren’t you?” The host asks, and before she could even open her mouth, a co-star of hers was already speaking. “She’d play his songs in her trailer in the morning, full volume, and sing them as loud as she could. It was a good way to wake us all up.” He jokes, and everyone laughs at that. “Whenever he’d post a photo on instagram, or tweet something, I’d see tears in her eyes.” Another co-star speaks up. The audience laughs again and she looks to them. ‘I’m serious! Y/N absolutely adores him.” By this time Y/N’s face was out of her hands and she was sinking into the couch. “Are you embarrassed, Y/N/?” The host jokes “Of course not, well I didn’t want to get absolutely exposed, but I’m not embarrassed to be a fan, could never be embarrassed to be a fan of him, he’s… he’s amazing.”

The phone then fades into yet another clip.

This time, Y/N is sitting in a stool, doing the Wired Autocomplete Interview, and she tears off the second paper of the question, “Is Y/N L/N…” . “Is Y/N L/N,” she reads and the paper catches after the word “dating” is revealed. She looks up at the screen, a twinkle in her eyes as she shoots a close-mouthed smile at the camera. She turns back to the board and rips the paper off, struggling a bit and laughing, until it’s revealed. “Is Y/n L/N dating… Harry Styles” She bursts out laughing, her free hand clutching her stomach.

Harry frowns a but at this, and he didn’t feel like thinking more about why.

“Um,” She begins, “Sorry, I just- do I really talk about him, that much? S’a bit concerning.” She mumbles to herself. “Yeah, no, I’m not dating Harry Styles, he would never. Though, I like how people think it could be a possibility, thats quite funny. I’ll take the… hidden compliment, is that even the right phrase?”

The screen goes to another clip but Jimmy pauses it there and turns off his phone, turning to Harry. “You didn’t do anything Harry, it’s just you being here, she’s probably overwhelmed and-“

“Mr. Kimmel? Jones needs you.” Someone calls out to him down the hall and Jimmy slips his phone in this pocket and sighs. “Sorry, gotta handle this, thank you, for coming.”

“It’s okay,” Harry assures him, “Thanks for having me.” And at that Jimmy rushes down the hall in search of Jones, and Harry stands in the same spot

Harry knows how much he means to his fans, he’s seen them sob at concerts, break down at meet and greets, and when they tell him how much they love him when they run into him on the street. He knows this. But this felt different, for some reason. Maybe it was the burning feeling in his chest when she laughed off how he would never be with her, for what particular reason he has no clue (or just doesn’t want to address it), or how he couldn’t help but pop a dimple when he heard she loves his music. He wasn’t sure.

What he was sure of though, is that he needed to speak to her again, hug her for longer, actually get to know Y/N. So he walked into the main back room, walking down different halls until he came across the one that read “Dressing Room #4” and Y/N’s name scribbled in messy handwriting on the white board underneath. He knocked a little rhythm, and waited.

Y/N was still crying, to put it lightly. Maybe hyperventilating was the right word, because she was breathing quite fast, and there was a steady stream of tears flowing down her cheeks. She heard the knocks and attempted to calm herself down a bit, yelling out a “One second!” Before wiping under her eyes and walking to open the door. “Eliana,” She began, ready to wave her assistant way (not that she didn’t adore her, but Y/N needed to be alone before talking about everything), “Can you come back in like 15 minutes, I’m sorry I just need to-”

Her mouth closed when she saw Harry outside of her door, his small smile quickly fading into a frown as he took in her state. “Y/N I wanted to- are you okay?” He asked, stepping a bit closer, trying not to push any boundaries. When she didn’t respond and he saw her bottom lip quiver a bit, his chest clenched. “Can I come in? Can we talk?” He gently asked, eyes running over her puffy eyes, tear stained cheeks, and disheveled appearance.

She nodded and he walked in, and she gently shut the door behind him. He turned around to look at her and when his eyes met her’s, she couldn’t take it anymore. She let out a gut-wrenching sob and her face fell in her hands as she shook her head. “I-I’m so sorry, I’m sorry.” She choked out and he stepped towards her, his hand coming to rest on her elbow. “Y/N, please, don’t apologize.” And without thinking he took the last step towards her and wrapped his arms around her, holding her firmly, one of his hands cradling the back of her head. Her hands fell from her face and she held him back, arms wrapping tightly around his torso yet again.

As she cried into his chest, he mumbled a soft, “Breathe for me, love.”, and she tried to get her breathing to match his own deep breathes. “I’m sorry,” Y/N says for the millionth time. “I told you to stop apologizing, Y/N, you haven’t done anything wrong.” He frowns to himself, that burning feeling in his chest again. She reluctantly pulls away, and his hands remain on her arms as her own come up to wipe the tears flowing out of her eyes.

“You didn’t sign up to be here and have to deal with a crying fan, Harry.” Y/N sighs, finally looking up at him.

“Hey, I came because I wanted to see you, I’ve seen your movies and I think everything you’re absolutely incredible at what you do, and when Jimmy called asking if I could come to surprise you I jumped at the chance to finally meet you. I know what I signed up for.” He says, his thumbs rubbing the skin of her arms gently.

At his words she let out another sob, her shaking hands coming up to cover her face for a moment yet again. Harry’s eyes widened, he was telling the honest truth, and he didn’t think he said anything wrong. Y/N however, was seeing in person, how king he truly was, and it was just another reality check that the Harry she’s loved for so long really is the same in real life; it was too much to handle. “Thank you,” She sniffles, looking up at him again, meeting his piercing green eyes. “I just, I’ve adored you for years, still do, and I never thought I’d meet you, even after I started getting ‘known’, I always thought you were like, too perfect to be real, and now you’re here and you’re real, and y’know when you meet a celebrity who seems so sweet in interviews and all that but they turn out to be an absolute prick? It’s not like that, you’re the same person I’ve loved over a screen, I- you’ve been my inspiration for fucking years and I don’t know. It’s just a lot.”

Now her hands were on his arms and they stood there for a moment, just looking at each other.

“M’not perfect, Y/N.” Harry says softly. Y/n chuckles a bit, glancing to the side before meeting his eyes yet again. “I know, I know the ‘nobody’s perfect’ crap, but if you’re insistent on it, then I think you’re the closest thing there is to perfect, Harry.”

His cheeks turn pink at her confession, and a small smile weaves its way onto his face. “Thank you,” He finally says, before bringing her into another hug, this time her arms wrapped around his neck, and he bends down a bit to hold her tighter. “For everything you said, seriously, you’ve got no idea how much it means t’me.” He admits, still reveling in her touch. She slowly pulls away, noting in her head that he never seems to be the one to let go first. “Of course, wouldn’t say it if it wasn’t true.” She smiles weakly, still drained from all the emotions flowing through her. He just smiles at that, before his hand drags down her arm and he hold her hand, wordlessly pulling her over to sit on the couch.

He doesn’t let go of her hand as they sit quite close facing each other. “Do y’wanna hear a secret? It might make you feel better.” He suggests, cursing himself for being willing to do anything to see her smile fully. “I wish I could lie and say that it’s something I wouldn’t know, but I think I know a bit too much about you.” She says, letting out a small laugh, and he does too. “I promise you don’t know this.” He mumbles.

“Okay, go for it.” She says, holding his hand a bit tighter.

“Well, after you bolted here, Jimmy showed me a few of your interviews, and I wanted to tell you that you’re my celebrity crush too.”

Her jaw drops and her eyes widen, a face that looks eerily similar to when she saw him for the first time just an hour prior. “You saw my interviews?” She gasps, her voice cracking at the embarrassment of him seeing her shamelessly confessing her love for him about a million times. It was safe to say she didn’t hear the rest of his confession.

“That’s what you’re focusing on here?” Harry laughs and raises a brow at Y/N.

“What else is there to focus on,” She groans, taking her hand out of his and burying her face into her hands yet again. “I can’t believe Jimmy showed you that, I’m never coming on this show again.”

Harry grins, a dimple popping as he gently wraps his arms around her wrists, pulling her hands off her face. “Did y’hear what I said after that?” He asks softly, his eyes bring into her own. She shakes her head “no” in response and he takes a quick breath before telling her yet again.

“I said, you’re my celebrity crush too. I’ve watched everything you’ve been in and I think y’are absolutely amazing, and I would be lying if I said I didn’t think you’re beautiful, inside and out.”

Y/N’s jaw drops for the thousandth time that night.

“You’re fucking with me.” She deadpans, her face blank and mind swimming with emotions.

He frowns and squeezes her hands. “M’not, swear to you.”

She shakes her head in denial. There’s no way she was Harry Style’s celebrity crush. Not in a million years would she ever think those words would be spoken, much less even thought of.

“You don’t believe me?” Harry asks, his head tilting a bit to the side.

“I believe tha you’re just too nice and you feel bad for me, so that’s why you’re telling me this.” Y/N admits to him, a sad smile on her face.

“Really?” He asks, letting go of her hands and bringing one of his own to his pocket.

“Really. I appreciate it, I do, but you don’t have to try and make me feel less humiliated, I think we’ve already passed the point of no return.” Y/N says, laughing a bit.

“Mmm, okay,” He smirks. “Well that just won’t do. May I have your number?”

She raises a brow as he pushes his phone into her hands, already pulled up on a new contact. She types in her number and “#1 fan” in the name and hand the phone back to him. Harry laughs when he sees the contact name and saves it to his phone, then putting it back in his pocket.

“What was that?”

“What was what?” Harry muses, a teasing glint in his eye.

She purses her lips. “Why did you just ask for my number?”

“So I can contact you of course,” Harry smiles. “How else am I supposed to set up another date with you?”

“Another?” Y/N questions, her lips turning up.

“’m a gentleman of course, would never ask you out on a first date over the phone,” Harry calmly explains. “So would you do me the honor of accompanying me to dinner tomorrow night?”

Y/n hesitates, unsure if this was still an ask out of pity. “You can meet me at my house, of course if you’re comfortable, and I’ll order us takeout to eat on my porch.” He continues, getting more exciting as he imagines how the date would go.

“What makes you think I’d say yes?” She teases and his mouth gapes.

“Oh fuck off.”

#I just used jimmy cause I didn't feel like making my own host up lolz #harry styles one shot #harry styles oneshot #harry styles #harrys styles imagine #harry styles fluff #harry styles fanfiction #im literally half asleep but I needed to post this tonight #harry styles x reader #harry styles x y/n

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ashintheairlikesnow · 3 years

Note

📋 Hello I am putting a formal request in for more Chris Saves Himself AU ft Mama Nakamura taking him I’m home only to realize the full situation

Continuing the Chris Saves Himself AU: One | Two |

CW: Grief, memory loss, recovering whumpee, some very brief and very vague references to noncon, minor whumpee (OC is 17), angsty fluff, reunion

It takes six days for the cops to let Akio's mom bring Tristan back to their house.

He's ready to be discharged from the hospital by day two, but there's nowhere for him to go. WRU is still saying there's no record of his existence, even with the barcode on his wrist. Tristan's only known living relative, Joanne Botham, is claiming he ran away from home and she had no idea what happened to him, that what she had told the Nakamura family was out of frustration and anger at Tristan for disappearing. The governor is out on bail facing charges for keeping Tristan in the mansion in the first place.

There are a lot of charges.

Akio feels by turns numb and enraged when he hears a news anchor read them out loud, bloodless words that don't seem to reflect at all how serious their meanings are.

The first few, he can process - false imprisonment, bodily assault - but then they keep going, and they get worse in ways Akio can barely even begin to imagine.

What Tristan has lived through... Akio's brain refuses to let it coalesce fully, but he has nightmares, dreams about Tristan screaming for him and being on the other side of a door Aki can't open.

He dreams about hands on Tristan's body and the way he might have screamed for help. Akio wakes up crying, retching, running to the bathroom to throw up whatever he's eaten that day as if he can rid himself of the poison of knowing.

His mom calls a therapist.

His father tells him to stop watching the news.

Akio just waits until they're in bed and searches for everything he can find on twitter, on reddit, on every-fucking-place anyone is talking about this. And it's everywhere.

He stops telling his parents about his nightmares after the second night.

Oliver Branch says WRU sold him a product they knew was outside the bounds of the law and lied to him about it. WRU says they don't know what he could possibly mean by that and they have no paperwork or documentation that Tris was ever in the system at all, and if he was, then there must have been a mistake about his age. They swear they'll do a total review of every single Box Boy, Babe, or Buddy to ensure absolute compliance.

The soundbites make Akio's mouth dry.

How many are there, then? If they have to keep looking to find more? How many like Tristan?

How many?

Joanne Botham, who never answers Aimi's furious calls and then changes her number after the second day, goes on TV and says she did nothing wrong and there's no proof that anything happened except maybe Tristan lying about his name and age to make WRU agree to take him in. Oliver Branch says he has the proof WRU knew, and he'll provide it in exchange for immunity.

They all point fingers at each other on national television, in press conferences and through their attorneys.

Through it all, Tristan sits in a hospital bed staring out the window at the blue sky as though it will be stolen from him all over again, waiting to be told where to go, what to do.

And it takes Aimi nearly a week to get the police to agree to allow her to take him home. She brings everything she can think of to meetings with the detectives heading up the case, shows them reams of team photos and home movies, folders and folders of everything Aimi and Mrs. Higgs had ever talked about or done together with the boys.

The hospital needs the room, needs the bed. The detectives don't want to put him into foster care when he barely seems to understand he's a person. The social services people won't take him because they're not equipped to handle a situation like this one. The adjustment houses don't want him because of something to do with what kind of Boxie he was, and Aimi doesn't elaborate and something in the set of her expression makes it clear Akio shouldn't ask.

After a week of mostly just being able to look at him through the small little square window in the hospital room's door, Aimi finally gets legal permission to take him out of there.

Akio isn't prepared for the slew of news vans that are there when he and Aimi arrive, someone having tipped off reporters that they might get a glance of the governor's secret Box Boy today. Aimi, though, simply sets her shoulders, slides a pair of dark sunglasses on, and walks through the crowd like a queen with her head held high, a small duffel bag handle in hand.

Akio hurries behind her, hands in his pockets and shoulders hunched, hood pulled over his head, trying to ignore ten thousand camera flashes. It's so much worse than the leadup to the Olympics would have been, if he were still performing at elite.

Or at all.

He has a strange, surreal hope that Tris won't be disappointed in him for quitting after Tris died.

Even though he's not dead.

They step into the hospital room around 10 in the morning to find Tristan not in the bed, but sitting on the couch built into the wall under the window, curled up on the crinkly plastic cushions to look out the window, humming low, soft and tuneless.

The hum makes Akio's heart ache with a sudden realization that this odd waking dream he's been living for a week isn't a dream at all. Tears flood his eyes and he has to blink them away as fast as he can. He's heard that hum in his ear as kids during sleepovers, he's heard it when Tris was nervous before performing a new routine, he's heard it while they waited anxiously for scores or studied for school.

"Hey, sweetheart," Aimi says, her voice low and soft, but even so Tris jumps and turns to look at them with wide, startled eyes. One hand goes up to his neck, and Akio swallows when he sees Tris has wrapped gauze around his neck to sit like the collar he was wearing when he fell from the governor's bedroom balcony.

Akio watched the cell phone video that made the rounds over and over and over again. The flash of red hair, shirtless, the bruises he was covered with, his hazy drugged eyes. Over and over and over again.

Watch him fall, watch him land, watch the people run to him and get him out of there when Akio has been sitting here crying his eyes to red half the time for a dead best friend who wasn't dead at all.

"H, Hello," Tristan says, but he doesn't know them. Akio can tell, the way his eyes move between them is uncertain, unsure. "Hello, ma'am. Can, can, can I, what..." He swallows, shivering, and Akio watches the fear move across his face. "What... what can I... do for you?"

His slowed-down voice makes Akio feel sick. He's only ever seen Tristan do that when he's with people who don't understand him or love him for who he is. Now it seems like it's the only way he remembers how to talk.

All Tristan's muscles from gymnastics are gone, leaving only faded shadows of his strength behind. He's skinny, so pale he nearly reflects the light from the ceiling. His freckles are faded, and his hair is shorter than Tris ever liked it.

Being so thin makes his eyes even bigger, they seem to overwhelm the rest of his face.

"Honey, we're going to take you to our house," Aimi says, keeping her voice the same low gentle cadence. "While we figure out what happens next. Aki and I will be taking care of you for a while. How's that sound? Would that be okay?"

Tristan looks between them again, and something shifts in his face. A kind of desperation moves there, and he turns more fully to face them, leaning over a little to look up at them. Hair falls over his forehead, and his hands move to rub over the texture of a loose pair of sweatpants someone gave him to wear under his hospital gown. "To... your house? Would I be... yours?"

He looks at Akio again, and there's something in his face that says he sees that as the best case scenario, that he was ready for far, far worse than simply changing owners. That he's... hoping he'll be Akio's property now.

Akio's stomach flips at the thought and he has to put a hand over his mouth and turn away, catching the sob before it can make its way up out of his throat.

Aimi's arm moves around his shoulders instinctively, and she leans over, pressing a kiss to her son's short black hair. "It's okay," Aimi whispers. "It'll be hard at first. But it's going to be okay, Aki. Saishūtekini wa daijōbudesu. Tristan wa mada anata no shin'yūdesu."

Tristan, sitting on the little couch, blinks a few times. "Friend," he says in English, a little haltingly. "Shin' yu. Means... best friend." He scoots closer to them along the couch, and his eyes are so big and so very, very green. Just how Akio always remembered them.

Aimi's head raises and turns to look at him, her arm tightening around Aki, breath catching in her throat. "You remember that?"

"No." Tristan shakes his head. Scoots a little closer, even. "Yes. I don't know why. Are you..." He looks at Akio. "Wa-... watashitachiha... sh-shin, um, shin-shin'yūdeshita. Yes? Did I-... did I say it right?"

Tristan's Japanese was never great, he'd just picked up some here and there from all the time he spent around the Nakamuras at home and in their car. They used to lay awake at night during sleepovers practicing over and over until Tristan had a new phrase to impress Aimi with.

But hearing his voice, his living breathing real live voice, sounding out the words...

It's too much.

It's too fucking much.

"Yeah, um, y-yeah, you-..." Akio's words are suddenly gone. He chokes on his fear that this somehow is a dream he will wake up from to find Tris still cold in some unknown open grave, and he can't keep the tears back any longer.

His knees buckle under the onslaught of grief and hope and fear and love, and he drops to the cold tile hospital floor, hands pressed over his mouth until his lips are pushed painfully into his teeth, and he wails, muffled but loud enough that there's rustling as the cops guarding the door turn to look inside through the viewing window.

Aimi drops into a crouch behind him, rubbing at his back as he curls over himself. Her voice trembles with tears she doesn't shed. Akio remembers the days after they were told Tristan was dead, how she would cry in her room at night with Aki's dad when he was home from work, but somehow when he and Emi were bawling their heads off, her voice stayed calm, she kept her composure.

Right up until she was alone.

Now, though, she's barely hanging on as her son sobs on a hospital room floor before the emptied-out shell of his best friend.

Bare feet pad along the floor until Tristan drops down in front of him, reaching slowly out. Cool fingertips touch the back of Akio's hand, and he pulls them slowly down to look and see Tristan only a foot or so away from him, kneeling, watching him.

"I know you," Tristan whispers. "It hurts, but... I know... you. Don't, um, don't I?"

Akio can barely see him through the tears that have turned the world to watercolor suggestions. Nothing's in focus. But he grabs onto Tristan's hand, those familiar always-cold fingers, and holds tight.

"You know m-me," He manages. "You do, Tris. You know me. We-... we know you. We want to t-t-take you h-home."

Tristan tilts his head to the side, and it's such a familiar gesture, one he was so sure he'd never get to see again. "My... name is Baldur," He says, softly. "My Sir named me-"

"Please don't call him that. Can you... can you answer to Tristan? Please?" Akio is the one to reach out this time, touching Tristan's shoulder, hesitant. Waiting for him to pull back and away, to flinch like he's been doing when they watch him with the nurses.

Instead, Tris takes a breath and leans into the touch.

"It hurts," He says. "But, but, but, but-... but I can try."

Akio nods, and then Tristan is moving forward, and their arms are around each other and Akio is scared of himself for a second, scared of the welling of feelings he can't control. He's afraid he'll crack Tristan's ribs with how tightly he holds on.

Tristan's face buries itself against his neck, into the crook of his shoulder.

"I missed you so much," Akio whispers against the coppery hair. He's going to start crying again. He can hear his mom sniffing behind him, digging into her purse to pull out the little pack of tissues she always has in there. "I missed you so, so much, Tris."

"I think... I think I, I, I missed you, too," Tristan whispers back, and Akio isn't sure if he can even know if he means it, but he also knows that it's so good to hear the words that he doesn't even care.

@burtlederp @finder-of-rings @endless-whump @astrobly @newandfiguringitout @doveotions @pretty-face-breaker @gonna-feel-that-tomorrow @boxboysandotherwhump @oops-its-whump @cubeswhump @whump-tr0pes @what-a-whump @whumptywhumpdump @downriver914 @whumpiary @orchidscript @nonsensical-whump @outofangband @eatyourdamnpears

#whump #chris saves himself AU #chris the strawberry blond romantic #akio nakamura #rescued whumpee #escaped whumpee #recovering whumpee #memory loss #dehumanized whumpee #reference to collars #grief tw #referenced death #caretaker and whumpee #memory recovery #bbu #box boy universe #box boy #box boy whump #minor whumpee

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