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v1olentdelights · 3 days
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Gotta delete all my online presence here because he for real just saw that I had tumblr on my phone 😭
Goodbye everyone, it was a pleasure serving you, and I will never forget you 🫡
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v1olentdelights · 15 days
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I literally get to watch Nico Hisher play LIIIIIIVE!!!!!! Like we are gonna be in the same room and I might cry!!!!!
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v1olentdelights · 21 days
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OF COURSE MY CAR BATTERY WOULD DIE THE DAY BEFORE I LEAVE FOR SPRING BREAK
OF COURSE I WOULD ACCIDENTALLY LOCK MY KEYS IN THE TRUNK OF MY CAR
OF COURSE I WOULD HAVE TO ASK THE GUY I AM TALKING TO TO COME PICK ME UP
OF COURSE HE LET ME SHOW OFF MY COOL CAR SKILLS
of course things turned out alright and when I hugged him I felt 10x better than I did not even 5 minutes ago
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v1olentdelights · 22 days
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live laugh laufey
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v1olentdelights · 27 days
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The Grieving Girl
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James Potter x Pettigrew!fem!reader - Sirius Black x Pettigrew!fem!reader - Remus Lupin x Pettigrew!fem!reader Trigger Warnings: HEAVY depression descriptions, mentions of dying, moving on from grief Summary: What is a grieving girl to do as the world moves on and she is stuck in a moment of time? Word count: 2.5k a/n: 4th piece to this 5 part series. This one is a bit long! Hopefully it is good, let me know what you think! I hope you enjoy it! <3 send an ask to be tagged!
*No ones grief or depression is felt or looks the same, this mixed depiction is some of what I go through and how media portrays depression and grief!
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Isolation. One thing you were sure you were good at. Something you had done for years, when others hurt you, when you knew expressing your feelings would hurt others, when you didn’t know who to turn to. It was almost second nature. And that is what you were defaulting to now. 
You would dream of him, his face haunting you. The never fading expression of pain etched on his face, and you stuck right where you were not being able to stop it. You could scream and cry but those who passed by seemed to think nothing of the screams, nothing of the body that was lying limp only a few feet away. 
The tears stained your face inside the dream and out. You would wake up and feel the smallest bit of tightness in the trail of the tears that only poured at night. But what killed you the most wasn’t the pain in the dream that seeped out into the real world, not the way your heart ached for a moment when you awoke. No, it was the numbness you were left with, the second your heartbreak appeared, it was gone and you were left with nothing. Nothing to solidify that he meant something to you. 
— — — — 
It wasn’t hard to catch the way you would stare off into the distance, as if you weren’t even really there, as if you were searching for something you could never find. There was an unspoken rule to not shake you out of that state, and it was usually respected, leaving you with a chilled beverage that was meant to soothe you with its warmth. 
Then the isolation began, days were blending together and you began to stick to the corner table in the room, away from the others. Only greeting them with a nod in the morning and bidding the goodnight quietly, barely a whisper. It wasn’t something to worry about, it had happened before and you would eventually come back to them. But the person you used to be was dead, that depression was trivial compared to this. The feeling was different this time, something you weren’t sure you would come back from. 
Rather than sitting by the fire that kept the living room warm with the others, with the family, you hid in your room curled up in the corner holding the blanket against you tightly. It was as if your pain was reawakening, but instead of taking over your feelings, it was taking over your body.
You heard a knock at the door, and then another, waiting for your response before giving up and just entering. 
“Do you want some dinner?” James asked, hoping to hear your voice, a rare sound nowadays. He was greeted with silence. 
“What about some tea? I can make the chamomile with some of that honey that you like.” Another invitation to talk, another met with silence. Now you were granted a huff of hurt and dismissal. 
“I’ll leave you be then.” Making his way out, he stopped and looked back at you from the doorway, and you just stared back. The light in your eyes was gone. 
— — — — 
Losing someone changes you. Losing your best friend, who was also your brother, changes you even more. Isn’t it funny that the person you are supposed to have the longest relationship with was actually the shortest? Now you questioned if you would ever find someone who understood and could hold steadfast through your times like these. How funny would it be for you to be left with no one. 
It was about 2 hours later and now you were laying in your bed, curled up with your back to the door. You had been watching the rain trickle down the window. It seemed that the universe was feeling what you could not and in a way, you were grateful that at least someone seemed to be feeling. There was another knock at the door, and this time you softly called them in, you were unsure of what made you welcome them. 
“Hey, I just wanted to check on you.” It was Sirius now. “The same as James left me, just in bed now.” Your voice was somewhat hoarse from not speaking for hours. 
“I see,” there was a quiet laugh before he laid his hand on your arm. But you were quick to shrug it off. “Well I am hoping you decided to eat. I haven’t seen you in the kitchen lately, and I know you don’t have any snacks left up here. And you certainly don’t have any water.” You knew this and had contemplated just stopping eating so you wouldn’t have to face everyone. But you knew that even though you wished to simply perish, your brother would be disappointed in you for thinking such a thing.
There was a movement, Sirius went back to the door now not turning until he heard the noise of your rustling in bed. He turned slowly to see you rising, and though you looked rather ragged and probably had a faint smell of body odor from not showering since that fateful night,  his face held a faint smile. 
“Do we have jam?” You asked quietly. 
“We do, your favorite.” his favorite, you wanted to correct, it was your brother’s favorite that you simply tolerated it. You nodded and followed Sirius down the stairs and into the kitchen. The others lingered there having a small conversation about a book they had both read, but stopped upon seeing you. It was uncomfortable for a moment, but they continued their conversation, and for that you were grateful. 
As you sat at the table, on the opposite end of everyone else, there was this hope bouncing throughout the group, maybe you would talk. Maybe you would cry and they could comfort you. And though they got their wish, it wasn’t at all like they wanted. 
“‘Tomorrow will be better’ I keep telling myself.” Keeping your gaze on your hands. “Yet every tomorrow just brings more pain. I’ll be honest, I understand the importance of the pain. But to ruin who I am? There is no more of me left. There is just a person.” There is a hand on your shoulder now, giving a comforting squeeze. But there is no one to comfort. You are simple there. Simply a victim trying to understand the pieces and the pain, trying to put together who you are. 
“One day, tomorrow will be better,” Pandora assured. But that's all anyone ever says. But they’ve never been through what you have. They try to say they understand, that they feel your pain. But do they? Have they lost everything? Have they been so cruelly broken apart that they can’t even find all the pieces of themselves? Have they been through it like you have? No. 
“Unless it’s not.”  you rasp out.
“You need to hold on to hope. Just believe it an-”
“I have held on and tried to believe for years.” look where that has gotten me you think to yourself “alone again.” Quickly getting up, wipe the tears that are slowly beginning to fall and gather your things, you head up to your room. Pandora rises to catch up with you but Regulus holds her back. 
— — — — 
The loneliness seemed to seep into every crevice of your life, but maybe that was only because you let it. Though you felt like you pushed it out. Maybe you weren’t trying enough and were simply so used to the disappointment, the anger, the rejection and abandonment that you let the loneliness and every other feeling fester. Maybe you needed to accept that hurt and use it as a stepping stool onto the next part of your life. 
So you decided to get your act together. No matter how exhausting it was to live life as if you weren’t dreading each day spent with your thoughts, as if you weren’t searching for your brother in everyone you met, as if you weren’t struggling every moment to stay strong in your mission to make a difference. There you were, sitting in the kitchen only a day later, cradling your cup of warm tea - this time you had already had about half the cup before it began to cool down. You heard the footsteps of your lover, though he made them quieter than usual, hoping not to set you off. James took the seat next to you.
“I wanted to talk to you about something important.” this was it. This was the moment he told you that he couldn’t do it anymore, between the flinching at loud noises and the constant check-ins, he finally broke. You turned to face him, showing that you were in fact listening and paying full attention. “I want you to know that when I say this, I am not forcing it, but it is an option.” He closed his eyes and rubbed his forehead as if he didn’t even want to say it. “If you aren’t feeling up to coming home with me this winter, then I am okay with that, I will stay here with you too, if you want. I know this year has been incredibly hard and I understand that being around people is still hard for you, probably even more so if it is a family. So please don’t feel like you have to put yourself through that just to please me.” His voice came out soft. 
Tears well in your eyes at the gentleness in his voice, at the mere thought that he truly understands that you may need something that he cannot provide in such a setting. So for the first time in a long time you pull him in for a hug. It takes him a moment to reciprocate, the foreign feeling of your body against his restarts him and his response, but before you can pull away, he wraps his arms around you and holds you tight. 
It’s always one step forward, three steps back. But the regression isn’t what hurts the most, it is the reaction to the regression. It is the hurt you see in your friends eyes as she watches you fall back into the old habits, It is the disappointment in your dead brothers eyes that you can’t seem to persevere, it is the watchful gaze of your friends younger brother that makes you feel even worse for not being a better example, it is the absence of your parents that makes you think that maybe they are suffering just like you. It was the pain in your boyfriend's eyes as he watched you close in on yourself.
You found yourself realizing that you couldn’t continue this way. You couldn’t hide in your room and put off the healing that needed to happen. Inhaling a deep breath, you catch the scent of James and find yourself letting go of the tears you had been holding in. It was a slow steady stream at first, but then it was wretched sobs that sounded like a wounded animal. Though you suppose that was what you were, a wounded animal finding itself back to a place of healing. Your boyfriend sat there, never letting up on how tight he was holding you, but was now rubbing your back in comforting circles. He did not shush your cries, did not wipe your tears, and did not try to calm you because he knew that this was needed. That without this break, there would be no way to heal. It took you a while to calm down, you had cried yourself into hiccups, something you had never done before, but now you were left shaking slightly as well. 
“I want to come with you. I want to come home.” Though the last sentence wasn’t referring to a physical place, but to here. To your boyfriend, to your friends, and back into your body. 
“I don’t want you to feel forced into it.” you shake your head in understanding. 
“I know, but I need to stop hiding.” He simply presses a kiss to the crown of your head. 
— — — — 
As you boarded the train he made sure you got the window seat so you could watch the scenery change. He pulled out your walkman and headphone and passed them to you before finally taking your hand in his and pulled it up to his lips giving you some kind of reassurance. 
It didn’t take you long to fall asleep with your head against his shoulder and music blaring in your ears. All he could do was admire you and how far you had come, not even a week ago were you not getting out of bed and now here you were on your way to visit his family. 
— — — — 
When you had arrived, it didn’t take long for his mother, Euphemia, to come bustling out the door and pulling you into a hug that cut off your breathing for a moment. 
“My best girl, how are you darling?” She gave you the sweetest smile, the kind that made you want to tell her all your insecurities and everything wrong, the kind that made you understand that things would be okay. “Would you be a dear and grab the bags” she motioned to her son, he just laughed as you were quickly swept up into the house. 
While your boyfriend was putting both your bags in his childhood room you were greeted by the rest of his family, his and your dearest friends. Remus gave you the sweetest smile, one you couldn’t help but return. And Sirius, he pulled you in for a hug and ruffled your hair eliciting a laugh, something none of you had heard in a long while. His parents were next, both looking at you as if you had it up their world. 
“Come here, honey.” Euphemia pulled you in for a tight hug as if she hadn’t just held you and released a breath of relief, you suppose. Maybe your boyfriend had been conveying your struggles with her, even though everyone knew. Now that you were thinking about it, he was probably struggling to hold onto all your pain and his own. Your eyes began to water at the thought of burdening him, but also from all the love that you were feeling. 
“Mom, you gotta let her breathe.” You heard James say from behind you. She let go reluctantly and moved onto her son. 
His father had always shared a special connection with you, having a boy, he wasn’t exactly sure how to deal with you when you came along. But when you started talking, he couldn’t stop. Now he stood before you with a face full of worry but also a certain shade of proudness. 
“You’re doing good, kid.” 
Such trivial things, and yet they meant the world to you. Stepping back, you felt James’ arms wrap around your waist from behind. 
“I have missed you guys so much!” you could feel the tears begin to fall
“Enough tears, I put on some hot chocolate and there are some cookies in the kitchen that could use some eating.
"Cookies?! When did you get those, there have been no cookies in this house.” Sirius freaked out. “Well, I kept them out of sight, I didn’t need you eating her cookies.” Their mother rolled her eyes before walking off, the two boys trailing along after her.
tags: @sheraayasher @jamieolivia27
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v1olentdelights · 1 month
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Foolish Girl
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Peter Pettigrew x sister!reader - James Potter x Pettigrew!fem!reader - Sirius Black x Pettigrew!fem!reader - Remus Lupin x Pettigrew!fem!reader Trigger Warnings: Betrayal, major character death, description of immediate grief and shock. Time skip Summary: Maybe you were foolish for thinking you could have a happy ending. Word count: 1.1k a/n: 3rd piece to this 4/5 part series. This one is a bit short but I was struggling with writing it and have been incredibly busy! Also there is a time skip! I hope you enjoy it! <3 send an ask to be tagged! series masterlist
time skip from last part (end of final year to October)
Was it wrong to be happy? You had spent months worrying about your brother, and yet here you were smiling alongside James and your friends making plans for Halloween next week. The absence of Peter, alongside Regulus, left a noticeable gap in your life. But there wasn’t much you could do except hope they were okay. At least that's what Remus kept telling you. He seemed to be the one most level headed with this situation. 
James had tried to console you, assuring you that Peter knew how to take care of himself and that he knew Peter still loved you, he would say almost anything to ease your fears. But Sirius was the only one who had gotten through to you, having lost his own brother to the terrors of death eaters. He didn’t sugar coat things, he told you about the nightmares, the flashbacks, the fears that he could have prevented his brother's fate. For that you would forever be grateful. 
In the week or so before Halloween, between all the planning, Sirius had received a memo from a R.A.B which entailed a timeline with random events. It would soon be decoded and in front of you would lay the blueprint to the defeat of the growing dark lord. Regulus had discovered the secret to ending him once and for all, having played both sides the entire past year. So when you received a small piece of paper with an address and a note about needing to talk from Peter, you couldn’t hold yourself back.
“I just have this feeling in my heart, it’s not a trap. My brother would never.” You looked away from the small paper and up to James with tears in your eyes. The fear and worry was apparent in his eyes, but there was something calling to you, telling you that you had to go. 
“James, she’ll be alright.” Sirius said earnestly. “She’s a big girl, and it is her brother.” He put his hand on your shoulder in comfort and in support. 
Maybe it was foolish, but a part of you hoped that this was Peter telling you that he was just playing the death eaters, much like Regulus. Maybe you could only see the good in your brother and maybe that’s why you came to meet him unarmed, but with Sirius waiting across the street. By the end, you realized it wasn’t possibly foolish, it simply was foolish. You heard him before you saw him.
“Sister,” There was some emotion in his voice that you couldn’t quite place. 
“You sent for me?” Holding up the small piece of paper for him to see as you rounded the corner. Now that you were facing your brother, you saw a horror cross his face. “Did you not?” Before you could carry on he had yanked you into the tightest hug he had ever given you (well almost, the first tightest hug being the day he left for Hogwarts and had to leave you behind). 
“I love you, and I’m sorry.” His voice was barely there. Yet you tucked your head into his chest a bit more and soaked it in, almost like you knew what was coming, 
“You have nothing to be sorry for, Peter. Just come home.”  
“I wish I could.” He sounded so sincere. “But I’ve gotten in too deep. I should have known this would happen.” Then a flash of green burst through the abandoned house. 
“This is what happens to those who betray me.” the voice of an unknown person said. But you were too busy focusing on the convulsing body in your arms, the mixed screams in the house. 
Without even realizing it you had fallen to the ground and were clutching to your brother's body. You could feel your throat stinging, but you weren’t sure why not yet at least. Holding onto Peter for a moment longer, you dared to pull away and looking back on it, you would forever regret it. Looking back at you were the dead eyes of your older brother. There was no life anymore. Then you felt someone pulling on your shoulders, you could only manage yelling at them practically demanding they leave you alone without tearing your eyes away from your brothers. 
They kneeled next to you for a moment and said something, you couldn’t quite hear, but then their hands rested atop yours and slowly peeled them off. You could only cry harder as you were drug away from him. The flailing began then as you tried to go back to him. But the person, you would later find out was Sirius, wrapped his arms around your torso and pulled you away further until you were out in the street. Panting and crying you decided to just cling to Sirius, sobbing into his shoulder. He could only hold you and rub soothing circles onto your back. 
— — — 
The funeral procession was held after Regulus had defeated the dark lord, with help from The Order of course. Some people came, but not many. You didn’t even have the energy to be aggravated that people had forgotten your brother and all the good he had done. All you could do was hold onto James and hope he would catch you if you fell. 
— — — 
Peter’s POV:
The piece of paper felt so heavy yet so small. Such a simple message spoke volumes.
‘Can we talk?’
Of course he would come and find you, he was her brother and even through all the wrong he had done, that is one thing he would remain. So he gathered his things, and prepared to head off to the meeting spot. Not once had it crossed his mind that something was off, all he wanted was to see his sister once again. 
You had walked in not five minutes after him, and though a new found warmth took over his body,  the confused and desperate look that you had on your face gave it away. This was no casual meeting, the paper you were now holding in front of his face was identical to the one sitting in his pocket. After you finished talking, he practically pounced on you. He knew what was coming, and only wanted to hold you. So that is what he did. He spent his last moments of life embracing you and telling you he was sorry. Before he could begin to tell you how happy he was of all you had done with your life he felt a sharp pain taking over his whole body. But for a moment, it was peaceful, there was no pain, no tears, no guilt… just peacefulness.
He allowed himself to be overcome with this feeling, and allowed himself to relax. He could hear the remnants of laughing and the voice of his friends, looking around, it was as if he was in the train compartment surrounded by the once more. 
@sheraayasher @jamieolivia27
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v1olentdelights · 1 month
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I write for myself
*checks AO3 every few hours to see if I got any new kudos, comments or subscriptions*
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v1olentdelights · 1 month
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May I please be added to the tag list of you will never be a god series 🙏🏼🙏🏼
Of course!! <3
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v1olentdelights · 1 month
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This week's post for You Will Never Be A God is probably going to be late. I have had such a busy week with almost no free time, and I have a date on Thursday! Soooo wish me luck, and hopefully, I can have our next piece up before Sunday!
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v1olentdelights · 1 month
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Leaving These Broken Pieces Behind You
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Peter Pettigrew x sister!reader - James Potter x Pettigrew!fem!reader - Sirius Black x Pettigrew!fem!reader - Remus Lupin x Pettigrew!fem!reader Trigger Warnings: Yelling, Peter hurts reader, crying, mention of Peter betraying his friends, reader also cries Summary: One moment is all it takes for everything to go down hill Word count: 1k a/n: Hello!! This is the second piece to the 4/5 part series, hopefully you enjoy. This part is a bit shorter than I wanted it to be buuuuut the next part is going to be a bit longer and a twist is coming! Also the next part will have a time jump because I am not that creative! send an ask to be tagged! series masterlist
The study room door was thrown open without a care in the world. You stood up from your sitting position at the table and caught your brother's eyes staring back at you. It had been about a week since you had last talked to him, give or take a few days. The bags underneath his eyes seemed darker, heavier even and he was clutching his back pack to his chest. 
“Peter…” you didn’t even know what to say, were you worried about him? Were you happy he found you? Were you scared? 
“What’s wrong with you?” He sounded out of breath, you just looked at him in confusion, you should be the one asking him that, though that seemed to have thrown him off last time. 
“No, I’m not. I’m worried about you.” Telling the truth might get you somewhere right?
“James is worried about you. Says you haven’t been eating or leaving your room?” “Well, I’m out of my room it seems. I’m worried about you.” you reiterated. 
You took a step closer, and then another. Soon enough you had been in front of him reaching out your hand, you held his right in your left. His eyes hadn’t left yours, though you could see his shoulders slouch, like the weight had been taken off, he had even dropped his bag the thud of books hitting the ground told you that. You grabbed his left arm now and pulled up the sleeves quickly knowing you’d only have one chance at this. 
It took you a moment to register what you were seeing, though a moment was all you got before your wrist was being twisted and was pushed away. The shriek that left you was almost like a wounded animal of some kind, though you probably could be considered such right now. Having been thrown to the ground, you cradled your wrist to your chest and looked up at Peter through watery eyes. 
“Why’d you have to do that, sister?” he spat out the title as if to use it against you somehow. But your eyes couldn’t help but lock onto the dark ink poisoning his skin and probably his mind. 
“Oh Petey, why’s you do this?” You could barely hear your voice, and you were sure that it was barely there inbetween the whimpers as sharp pain continued to spread through your arm
“I did what I had to, and- and I thought of all people you would understand. But I was afraid this would happen.” He reached for his wand, which rested in his pants pocket. 
Never before had you thought your brother would hurt you. Though right now, the look in his eye and the grip on his wand told another story. Something in you was screaming at you to call out. So as you stared your brother down, at the end of his wand, you yelled as loudly as you could. You could see his eyes go wide, he was frozen for a moment. 
“I love you.” It was barely above a whisper but it sounded like the loudest thing. 
“I loved you too, Peter.” With that he grabbed his bag, pocketed his wand, and ran for the door. Laying on the ground, you let your head fall to the floor. Just as his footsteps were fading, you heard a new pair. You didn’t know who, but you were just thankful for them hearing you. It was only when you saw the curly hair above you that you let the darkness take over. 
— — 
You weren’t sure of the time, but you were sure you felt the twitch of a hand in yours. Slowly peeling your eyes open, you saw James laying his head next to you as he held your uninjured hand in his. Looking around a bit you saw who you were almost positive was Remus sitting by the window looking out, and Sirius was sitting at the end of your bed flipping through some magazine Lily had given him no doubt and picking at his nails. You thought about kicking him for it, the picking was something you were trying to get him to stop doing. 
Sirius turned around at the sound of your hair moving against your pillows. His eyes looked empty, something you hadn’t ever seen. Sure there had been the times he would come back from home, or get a letter from his mother and they were dim. But never empty. 
“What are you doing here?” You spoke first, your voice roused James and had Remus facing you. Closing your eyes for a moment, it all came rushing back the yelling, the mark, the tears, you felt a sharp pain shoot through your arm then, you took a deep breath. This had to be an awful dream, right?
“Peter… he’s gone.” Remus announced. You felt more awake at that sentence. Gone? Gone where? What has he done? James was rubbing his thumb across the backside of your hand comfortingly. 
What happened before I got there?” James questioned. “I was coming to look for you and then I heard you scream. So I came running only to find you crying on the ground holding yourself.”
The room was silent for a good 5 minutes before Sirius went to pitch in, he was cut off though.
“He’s turned bad.” you tried to wipe your face but James kept his grip on your hand. “Peter has the dark mark.” It was only then that you let yourself completely fall apart. There was a wail of some type that left you, one that was riddled with the understanding that you had lost your brother for good. 
James began to silently cry as well, was this his fault? Did he somehow bring this on, in some way had he neglected Peter? Why couldn’t he have been better? Remus held it all in, something he was used to doing - holding in the pain. Though he turned to face the window again, hoping to wipe away the stray tear falling down his face. Sirius… well Sirius just sat there wondering how he lost not only his baby brother but now one of his best friends to this new evil. So it was Sirius who broke the sad silence. 
“It will be okay. He’ll be okay.” Maybe he was speaking for his brother as well.
You had stayed the night in the infirmary, the boys staying with you, scattered around in surrounding chairs. That night your dreams were filled with cries and screams, full of dark swirling clouds, and your brother calling for you. 
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v1olentdelights · 1 month
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He bought me my favorite flowers today <33
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v1olentdelights · 2 months
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Babel is basically about like British colonialism with small amounts of fiction. It’s quite like a dark academia vibes and really good (it has found family trope as well!)
You have read love hypothesis? How is it?
Oooooo, I love that!!! I might have to look into it! Yes, I have, and it is one of my favorites. It kind of helped me see that love is attainable for someone like me, and I liked the academic aspect of it. While it is a romance, it's college/graduate school and women in stem based... so that is what mattered most to me! It's soft and sweet, and yeah!! He fell first and harder and fake dating trope!!
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v1olentdelights · 2 months
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The Fine Art of Lying
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Peter Pettigrew x sister!reader - Sybill Trelawney x Pettigrew!fem!reader - Sybill Trelawney x Peter Pettigrew (mentioned) Trigger Warnings: Yelling, Peter is angsty, crying, mention of Peter betraying his friends. Summary: Your brother began to pull away for unknown reasons. But when confronting his girlfriend seemed like a good idea, you got more than you bargained for. Word count: 1.4k a/n: Hello!! Here is the beginning of this new series brought on by my depression and dead brother! Let's jump right in! send an ask to be tagged! I am hoping to update like... once a week? on Fridays or Saturdays also I will update the links when the next piece is written series masterlist
He began pulling away about 3 weeks before summer began, you didn’t think much of it. You had asked him a few times if he was okay and he said it was simply just the realization that it was his last year. So you let it go, because you understood what it meant to him. Prior to Hogwarts he had always been an outcast and alone, besides you of course. But that first week after meeting his friends Sirius, James, and Remus, something had changed, he had changed for the better. 
However when Remus had confronted you about Peter in the last week of school, you began to worry. He had told you about how Sybill broke up with Peter, how Peter began to come back later and later in the evening, how he didn’t seem much like himself anymore. So you decided to push now, push for your best friend to tell you what was going on, to share whatever was burdening him,  like you always had. 
— 
You had managed to catch Peter outside by the lake, near a patch of honking daffodils, your favorites. He was laying down, watching the clouds move slowly, like they had nothing better to do. 
“Petey?” You asked, even though you knew it was him. His head whipped around to see you looking over at him. “Yeah, it’s me. Are you alright?” You could hear the exhaustion in his voice, and even from here you could see the sweat that covered his forehead. If only he’d take off the jacket, he wouldn’t be heating up. You made your way over to lay next to him, your arms brushing against one another. 
“I’m okay, how are you?” your voice was caring, he knew that you knew something was wrong, you were giving him a choice to talk about it. 
“I’m fine.” it was a clipped answer, “Why do you assume something is wrong? Why does everyone think something is wrong with me?” his tone seemed angrier. 
“I never said-”
“But you implied it! I know you!” He sat up, going to stand but you grabbed his arm and yanked him back down, missing the slight flinch when you squeezed tightly.
“No.” You looked at each other, almost bewildered at the emotion in your voice. “Tell me what’s wrong. Sybill broke up with you, you have been staying out late and avoiding your friends. What is happening to you?” “Nothing! Just drop it!” Peter had never yelled at you in anger before. But right now, it felt like you had been slapped, the anger was practically radiating off of him. He pulled his arm back and stormed off towards the castle. 
So you went to Sybill, a seer and your brother's ex-girlfriend. Maybe she could enlighten you somehow, maybe you could figure out how to help your brother. It took you a while to track her down, but you found her finally tucked away in a glass room in the library. 
“Sybill,” you called out as you knocked on the door. “Can I talk to you?” She turned to face you with a sad smile, you didn’t have to guess how this conversation was going to go. There was a chair across from her that you took a seat at. Moonlight cast a shine over a teacup infront of her, and it made the tear streaks apparent down her face. 
“What is going to happen?” Your voice was barely there. She reached out to take your hand as she recounted the event from almost a week ago.
Sybill had seen that Peter would betray the ones he loved, she could guess who it would be. So she ended things, it wasn’t easy, but begging wouldn’t have done anything. And maybe in doing so, something would change, so she spent weeks watching the tea leaves, never once had she drank so much tea in a day. 
“Why would I do that?!” Peter yelled, the fact that the thought had even crossed Sybill’s mind angered him.
“The leaves Peter, hey don’t lie!” She was crying at this point. 
“The leaves don’t mean anything, the fact that you are even suggesting I am capable of such a thing hurts me more than you actually saying it.” He simply scoffed at her tears. 
They sat there in silence for a moment, well more like silence broken by the occasional sob Sybill couldn’t silence. As she reached out to take him he pulled his hand away quickly. 
“If you think I’m a bad guy, what’s the point in being anything else?” He sounded less angry and more determined now.  “I loved you Sybill, I really did, and I thought you loved me too.” 
“Peter! I do love-” She cut herself off as he stood up so quickly it pushed his seat back a few inches. 
“LIAR!” he yelled before storming out of the observatory. 
You began to sob, how could he do such a thing? Surely he wouldn’t hurt his friends, he wasn’t even one to kill a spider, even when he was afraid of them. She pulled your seat closer, the same one Peter had sat in all those days ago, and wrapped you in a hug and cried alongside you. What were you supposed to say? How do you tell the boys about this? Was this even real? As if sensing you rising questions Sybill began talking again.
“I have been watching the leaves, I have been listening to the wind and the stars, hoping that it could be wrong. But nothing is changing, just reiterations of what we know.” 
Now you would have to confront him, to tell him you knew, but that there had to be some way to change it all, some way to stop it. There was no way. But for now, you would let Sybill hold you and you would hold her.
— 
You were unsure of how to approach your brother with this new found information. You didn’t want him to think that you believed such things, because you didn’t quite believe it. But there was the problem of you being worried that it was true. How would you tell his friends? The thought of looks on their faces had you feeling sick. So you did the only thing you could think of… you avoided him and all his friends, you even pulled away from James, who was getting increasingly worried about both you and Peter. 
He had, admittedly been distracted at one of the final quidditch practices and though he is the captain, he finds himself getting yelled at by the others until he ultimately cuts practice short by an hour. Surprisingly, he can’t find it in him to roll his eyes at the minimal cheering from the team. All he can focus on is getting changed and back to the castle to catch Peter before he leaves to study. And somehow he does. With dripping wet hair and his shirt slightly sticking to him, he opens the dorm door as Peter is opening it to leave. 
“James!” Peter yelps and clutches his book bag a little tighter. James gently grabs Peter by his shoulder and steers him back into the room.
“Peter, I’ve missed you mate. We haven’t been able to catch each other, always doing other things. How’ve you been?” 
“I’m actually busy right now, maybe later.” Peter deflects and tries to push past James. 
“Come on, I feel like I never see you! I don’t know what’s going on with you.” James can see him flinch the slightest at the implication. 
“Sorry James, not everyone has time for their friends, you’d know all about that.”
“Aye, what is that supposed to mean?” He sounds hurt but also defensive 
“Not all of us can be a God as easily as others, we have to climb our way up!” Peter begins to get more upset. 
“What are you going on about? I said I haven’t seen you in a while and I’m worried about your sister.” There was a sharp intake of breath from Peter at the mention of you. “She stays locked in her room, not eating, worse than you.” But that seems to snap him back into whatever anger he was holding. 
“Worse than me?” whipping around to look James straight in the eyes, “Not all of us can be as perfect as you.” and then he is gone, the door slamming behind him. 
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v1olentdelights · 2 months
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Omg babe *squeals* that’s so sweet of him I’m so happy for you!! 🥹🥹
I have not started writing the essay unfortunately.. but I’ll get through it.
I have started reading but I can’t remain consistent.. I have started Babel by rf kuang and I wanted to start re reading Percy Jackson
TAYLOR SWIFT NEW ALBUM OMG it’s giving me evermore and folklore vibes and I’m loving that. How do you feel?
LITERALLY I AM SQUEALING TOO!! Thank youuuu! <3
Aw! You got this! No I totally get you!! I just finished a reread of The Love Hypothesis... it took me forever to finish though. I've never heard of that, what is it about? And also, you should totally reread the Percy Jackson series!!
I heard that its supposed to be like a pop synth vibe??? It most definitely looks like it will be good and I can't wait for it to come out!!
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v1olentdelights · 2 months
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Oh my god the nice guy!! How is that going Gracie? 😏😏
Ah no nothing exciting for me to tell, my life is still bland unfortunately but I have an essay due on Wednesday so there’s that
Hehehe, girlyyyy, he is sweet and pays attention to what I say!! And he doesn't make me feel bad about stupid things or when I screw up what I'm talking about. We went to a hockey game the other day with my friend, and she approves of him. And he invited me over to watch a movie (I found out a romance movie) with him this week. Though I'm hoping that's all it is, just watching a movie and nothing else!
🫤 that's awful! I mean, sometimes a bland/boring life for a period of time is nice. Oo, what's it about if you don't mind me asking, and do you think you've done well on writing it? Have you read anything lately? Have any favorite songs that have been on repeat? Oorrrrr, like, how are we feeling about the announcement of Taylor's new album?
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v1olentdelights · 2 months
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Hey how have you been doing?
Hello!!!!!!!!! I am doing pretty great!! Well ish. I have been missing my brother a lot because I would normal fill him in on drama, but obviously I can't. Buuuut I'm talking to this super nice guy, and I'm doing pretty good in classes and my overall mood throughout the day is like, alright but exhausted.
How are you doing?! Have you been up to anything fun lately?
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v1olentdelights · 2 months
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You Will Never Be A God
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Peter Pettigrew x sister!reader - Marauders x Pettigrew!fem!reader
Trigger Warnings: Betrayal, Major character death, depiction of depression... other possibly?
Summary: Being a sibling to a marauder was never easy, though you and your brother, Peter, had a fairly good relationship. He loved you dearly and you love him. But could one night, one moment change that all?
** Send ask to be tagged **
About series
Chapter 1: The Fine Art Of Lying
Chapter 2: Leaving These Broken Pieces Behind You
Chapter 3: Foolish Girl
Chapter 4: The Grieving Girl
tags: @sheraayasher
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