#HE DIDNT EVEN REMEMBER WHO BENJY WAS | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

calkale · 10 months

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I'd love to hear more of your thoughts in re mi7, cause most of the responses to the movie that I've come across have been positive (which clashes with the way I see it....) and I really agree about the negatives you mentioned (stunts being underwhelming even though they're the trademark of the series, the literal main character being neglected in favor of someone who's appearing in the series for the first time and whose biggest credit is that fuckass cgi disaster excuse for a multiverse movie- fr I had to look Hayley Atwell up to see what she'd even been in- and the long-standing supporting cast including luther, who'd been there since the beginning, just being discarded by the script like litter out of a car window). also it'd be cool to hear about smaller details cause often something is really off about a script and it kinda ruins the whole thing but you don't really know what it was till afterwards, and with new releases you can't rewatch or discuss it with much of anyone else (again, all there is are column reviews and stuff and they're mostly the same and very general on account of staying spoiler-free ).

Okay gonna be honest i havent looked at a single review or post about this movie other than the ilsa one i reblogged this morning cause im still so upset over it. Thank you for sending this ask cause i felt so alone lmao im glad someone agrees with my thoughts.

I hate them for making hayley the main character, if these are the last two movies, which it feel like they are, ethan and luther should really be the main characters along with benji and ilsa, not some new character. All for adding new characters and hayley couldve been in the start of the movie she had a place there she was the thief but after that she literally just took ilsas spot as the “woman of the team” as well as ethans spot in the spotlight.

This movie also seems to go against a lot of things ive heard mcq say in interviews, i cant source them cause i dont remember which ones theyre from but he’s talked about not over explaining things in movies and hes talked about not not wanting a strong female lead thats exactly like what hayelys character is in this movie. The over explaining thing happens SO FUCKING MUCH in this movie i was so bored and it just made me more lost because there was all this information i was taking in CONSTANTLY and i was trying to remember what character was doing what and who they were and it was just too much. I get this movie is probably more of a set up for part two but now we have all this shit we need to remember for part two and i dont even really wanna see it if im being honest, i will but if its anything like part one i know im gonna be disappointed again especially if its going in the direction i think its going.

Ive been trying to remember a lot of the smaller details that i noticed when watching it but a lot of them were part of bigger issues anyway so i just kinda grouped them together. Ill talk about the plot tho cause i knew i was gonna hate it but i didnt know id hate it for this reason. In other mi movies theyre doing the things they do because they have no other choice, in this movie it felt like there were so many choices that couldve been made and they didnt even talk about them it was just we’re doing this and thats it. Like on the train there were definitely better ways of doing that and i get there were short on time but that was almost exactly like the burj khalifa scene. Short on time, cant make a mask, need to meet with someone to make a deal. I just feel like there was so much more that they couldve done with that and the cliff jumping stunt and they just didnt do anything it was so underwhelming.

Going off of that a lot of things in this movie just didnt make sense to me and/or didnt need to be there, the ai villain?? Honestly couldve been cut completely, yes it was creepy but it didnt like actually do anything? everything it did couldve easily just been garbiel messing with the team and that wouldve also given paris more screen time (which i really would’ve liked i loved her character). As much as i loved briggs and degas they also didnt really need to be there? Dont get me wrong they were one of the things i really loved about this movie especially degas but there was really no point in them being there.

The main focus of the movie should have just been getting the keys and destroying them so no one can use the weapon that was on the sub, the ai did not need to be a part of it, someone couldve found the untraceable sub because this is fucking mission impossible!! Thats what happens in these movies!! The impossible!! Im grabbing tom cruise by the shoulders and shaking him nothing impossible happened in this movie

The submarine scene at the start also bothered me. I was fully expecting that to be the big stunt at the start of the movie i was really excited i was constantly like omg wheres ethan, i thought the torpedo or missile they saw on the radar was ethan and that was him entering the sub and something was gonna happen but no, not even close. Not a bad opening just not what i expected and that kinda made it bad.

This is an absolute mess of a post my apologies i have much more to say but i need to get back to drawing benji

#mi7 spoilers #listen i am really happy people like this movie #im glad it has the rating it does #i just dont get it at all #calkaleasks

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quenthel · 1 year

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OC question: how do your Knight-Commanders wind up feeling about Areelu?

ooo good question! hmmm the three of them that are more closely connected to her in one way or another are Tessa, Duncan and Cass.

Tessa feels a lot of kinship with her and at first think that she can conquer her and turn her to be good (because she also used to be a demon worshiper and used her smarts and looks to get ahead in that environment) but then she kind of develops this fellow scientist's respect for her, while Areelu very much sees her as a true replacement for her daughter so the two of them can ascend to godhood together. And while Tessa is a Sarenrae worshiper and NG while mortal, she becomes a more neutral angelic god as she ascends, so instead of trying to change Areelu she focuses on reverse engineering fate and shit w her together.

Cass when she goes full GD treats Areelu as her pet project essentially lol. Like slowly working trough her grief and loss and eventually she is able to change her but only a little bit like temper her rage somewhat and reverse the demonic corruption thats in her. Areelu still thinks of her as her child coming back in a manner of speaking and they do end up growing somewhat close even emotionally but neither of them admit that (Areelu still holding her defeated over Cass's head, Cass never having a parental figure being unable to really deal with her like that). Also this gives way to potentially the funniest family dinner where she invited Areelu, Wendu and Galfrey. Rancid vibes.

Duncan is like... opposite lol. Eventho they COULD very very easily bond over shared loss (Areelu losing her child, feeling like her fate is being controlled by cosmic order vs Duncan losing his mother, feeling like his fate is being controlled by cosmic forces you SEE) they don't. Duncan gets mortified that he keeps remembering Areelu fondly like he would his mom and those memories freak him out so much he ends up giving up his trickster powers and Areelu ofc never ever forgiving him for that and getting very VERY pissed. If things turned out differently they could have been the greatest of friends, but instead they are the greatest of enemies, who scream "I cant believe you ruined my life with your dumb decisions!" at each other.

For the rest its like... Bell is too Nocticula pilled to really give any thought to her except for "yeah i would be mad too if my daughter got killed". Marci is pretty neutral because on one hand she feels empathetic but on the other hand Areelu's behavior and selfishness is too repulsive for her. Masha is weirdly fond of her because she is a lot like her own mother who is a vampire, but she is also too judgemental to form any connection. Benji is ??? but they might get along I didnt really get far enough into her playtrough to say.

#asks #pathfinder

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chikaoofka · 2 years

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🖊🖊🖊🖊🖊🖊 hi

6 whole pens what do you want from me!!!!!!!

anyways i guess you rolled a 2 and a... 1... okay fortuna smiles upon you today or something you got BENJY !

i will be honest i forgot he existed but here's 6 (hopefully) small fun facts about him from....what i remember............ and pic for reference Because I Never Posted Him Before yeah?

i literally dont remember why i named him benjy it just came to me in like a fever dream or something. thats not a fun fact?

im sorry i just noticed hes 4'3 oh my god. thats like TALL for a tockhau but like STILL.

hate 2 be that guy but like most tockhaus he's actually so bad with conflict and the one time he was in an expo he like die.d (<- panicking i mean he was so panicked. and i didnt even have a good epxression for it

"2 strengtrh" weak ass

ALSO HE'S PRETTY [Stylish]. IF I ACTUALLY DREW HIM MORE OFTEN HE'D BE IN ALL SORTS OF OUTFITS YOU WOULDNT BELIEVE IT.... he just.... doesnt ACTUALLY hqave the trait? the earrings stay always though. unless he Has Better Earrings

he actually nearly had a band once then i forgot. now he's a guy here 2 bring people happiness through music by... himself ! he's pretty awesome . loves to see all kinds of Art he thinks its like SO neat .

something something, too , one of my Two Whole Characters who left their planet just 'cuz they were curious and then kinda never really went back often. i kinda think benjy visits rather often though 'cuz he probably likes it there.............. i would not be surprised

#benjy mode #<- surprising words said out of my mouth #really funny the one like cosmosdex fan rolls a cosmosdex character?#ALMOST cosmosdex fan #ask #mors v2 #YOU LITERALLY HAVE A COSMOSDEX AI NAME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#mors unit. i point at you. maybe is should have made up a mors unit on the spot. or dug mors vB out of the deepest pit of hell that is his #planet in order 2 say nonsense because i will behonmest i dont care about him anymore #pretend there is a comma at the end of that tag its not as funny without it

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voyeuristicvixen · 2 years

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Captains Log No.22 _ Master Rez Day 11

Yesterday was my rez day, 11 years on the grid. I don’t think I need to go into detail about how much SL has changed... Just the population of young, black creatives on SL has gone way over what was accessible back in the day. . . I am extremely grateful for this, thought it can be bittersweet to witness at times how the community chooses to represent themselves in these spaces. I think we have a great opportunity in SL for tolerance and acceptance and also to gain greater understanding of our inner emotional landscape safely. There are so many things to explore about how you think and move in certain situations that many wouldnt have the chance to process the way you can in virtual worlds. There is a kind of forgiving essence to it. One thing we all have to remember to put our experience in SL in perspective is that many of us come on here to escape in some ways and also to expand. Upon thinking, upon the imposed limitations of the mundane world... We have a chance to really dream freely.Its something I am so very grateful for. Being in SL as a teen, I spent most of my time with old hippies. I learned so much about life and the world through listening to their stories and experiences. That is one thing I hope will return, just being able to hang out and talk and disagree without disrespecting each other. Simple enough but I’ve noticed lately hard to find...

My return to SL really was prompted and became 10x better because of this man next to me Wav, who also made sure to spend this first rez day I ever celebrated in 11 years, with me. We have a relationship beyond SL and it is long distance, SL provides us a way to feel like we are together as we prepare for coming together in RL. It is really a great platform for that! Anyone in a long distance relationship who wants to do more to experience living and being with your loved one tap in! There is a lot to navigate with all the various personality and plain disrespectful people that you might encounter, for us it has made our communication better and relationship stronger. Exploring SL alone is so much fun, but exploring SL with a friend or loved one is really another level!

So he took me to this beautiful African Restaurant after we had spent the afternoon really tapping into and talking about the importance and beauty of African renaissance and how it is coming into the zeitgeist of the world at this time. We watched a documentary which I posted in my blog prior to this, so good! This restaurant actually had some of my favorite meals from back home! Okra soup with fufu and Lamb! I was in heaven!

“This okra stew is good but n o t h i n g like my ma’s!” XD He bought me some beautiful jewelry that I had been drooling over for a minute now, always knows what I like and he takes time to show he cares. We ended the night at Benji’s place for a low key grown and sexy night out. I didn’t make a big deal about my rez day this year.

Thing is.. a lot of my old friends from back in the day are dead and gone from SL. I was amongst old hippies that lived traveling and following the grateful dead in their youth... The sim that I grew up in is now closed to the public sadly, but it was a historic site where you could learn all about the band and feel like you were living in the times... I cherish those moments and my life at the commune. I lived in a little bubble in my past SL life and through that safe sheltered space I learned of many different perspectives... I was in poetry clubs and hosted parties, DJ’d orgies and naked weekend parties haha.. The most open minded and loving people of the world I found on this... I will hold it so close to my heart forever and ever. Now I am experiencing a whole different life on SL, being a bigger black community available, instagram is a thing that we didnt have back then to connect and share... now I am building a whole family with a zooby baby! I never would have imagined this in the past. I am excited to make new friends and have even more fulfilling experiences building with MY PEOPLE, BLACK PEOPLE, AFRICANS, INDIGENOUS!!! Its a whole other level to what we can achieve for connecting the diaspora together now that people are locked in.

Foxey was wild as they came now as a true Pisces shes surfin Wav and makin waves too. P.S. Shoutout and thanks to Wav for making that day extra special! XOXO

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youngsamberg · 2 years

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omg midge is so damn annoying like. everything she does is so selfish im sorry immaboutta rant

1) poor benji??? he was so supportive of her career and if she had simply told him she wanted to tour with shy he woulda been like go for it queen love u but instead she cheats on him with joel because she "wants to be with someone who loves her for just one night" when they were writing the whole relationship with benji to be someone who actually loved her not the artifice she portrayed to other people so even writing wise it made no sense??

2) the fact that she was actively angry at susie for so long for landing a massive client and it keeps being an issue? like i get being hurt for a sec but thinking practically if susie manages both of them then its not like sophie can bar her from clubs anymore... susie only ever did things for midge's career, literally had contracted killers out to get her and as soon as she isn't 100% focused on midge 100% of the time midge gets mad??? even tho when susie was tryna push her career she didnt want it half the time?

i cant even remember what happened in season 3 because i keep getting too mad to finish the show i think i fully blocked the outing u mention out of my brain i Do Not Recall It but every single thing she does is so so selfish shes genuinely a bad person but we as the audience are supposed to be all clicks to the girlboss about it also LMAO at the fact that when she's on tour the only person she makes friends with is the One Other White Woman in a band full of African American women like thats so midge of her

there's prolly way more examples that im forgetting but i got angry at the end of season 2 and stopped my rewatch. i like most of the other characters except midge but it was 2 much!

YES YES YES TO ALL OF THIS!!!!!!!!! she’s so unbelievably selfish all the time and then gets mad at other people when she isn’t the most important person in their lives??? and throws away true love with benjamin who i LOVED for her for fucking JOEL???? JOEL!????????? god i hate her she’s the worst

#anonymous

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infectedpaul · 2 years

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VOLUME 4 SPOILERS AHGHH

I FORGOT TO GET MY NOTEPAD OUT

OK NOTES: BRADS A QUARTERBACK HANNAHS HAVING VISIONS OF THE FUTURE PROB LEX DOESNT HAVE INSURANCE DR LASZLO

ok here we go 24,000 JOEY RICHTER ETHAN FDLFJDSLFDJLFASJ

HE LOOKS LIKE MY FUCKING BROTHER WEBBY IS SUCH A DORK webbyyy......:( waAAAH HANNAH BIRTHDAAAY HANNAH BIRTHDAAAAAY WE FOUND OUR NOISEMAKERS its october 5th hannahs bday is october 5th! A SEA BISCUIT? THE AFOREMENTIONED PIZZA PETE its that fucker from home alone HES THE HES THE FAT HORSE FROM THAT LAS PEGASUS EPISODE doug dimmadome owner of th I THOUGHT HE SAID JABLINSKI EDDIE JABLINSKI JDSLFJAS ok but this means that ETHan remembered hannahs bday even if lex didnt okaaaay. givin me a lil more respect for the fucker watch its like. a shining twist n all these people are from the 1920s or smth purple blue and green lights hm hatchetfield rollerama mother nature and father time the 4th dimension

that titan of time, he takes a lickin and keeps on tickin its stopwatch (jon matteson, who looks so dumb) the hotheaded human inferno, if you cant take the heat get outta her kitchen, she's spitfire (bryce charles) KILL JON MATTESON

HADOOOOUKEN HES GOT HYPERTIME its the soup thing from epithet erased WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO WHAT THE FUCK IS A SEA BISCUIT? pokey-man lex that isnt??? really?? ethans job to make sure you remember! youre her sisteR?? and maybe this is something you should talk about in private?? stopwatch's real name is daniel! (ELFMAN?) benji can talk to dogs and can make every dog in town bark at once A BIG SHOT? i love u daneil!!! BLUE SHIT mind melt?? her face is fresh, her power unknwon, lets find out if shhes got a killer sting! yeeeellloooww jacket WHY ARE THEY BOOING?? WHAT THE FUCk the drugs are kicking in HERE COME THE NEUROOOOOOOOOOOOONS "i love psychonauts- what the fuck" - hydra THIS IS THE FRIENDSHIP GAMES ITS HAPPENIJGGGGGGG HAH-NAAAAAH my legs were SHAKING when theat fucker showed up IM NOT KIDDING!!! i love these kids oh my gd... SHERMAAAAANFLDSKNFDSKFNJASKLDJLS LITTLE GERMAN BOY WITH A BIG LOLLIPOP GOIN TO THE POOPENFARTEN CAAAREFUL DAAEEEDY goT MY FOOT ONT HE GAS WERE R I CH MR B! "a saudi prince emailed me" YA EVER HEARD OF NFTS, LEX? hydra: MY FELLOW LORDS IN BLACK....I HAVE DISCOVERED A NEW WAY TO GET TO THE HUMANS...THEYRE THESE FUNNY LITTLE MONKEYS- where is ethans mommy SEEE IT WORRIES ME WHEN YOU SAY THAT CRYPTIC SHIT good god you are so fuckin UGLY two people at the rollerama are DEAD charlie paid for pokey?? IS thatpokey?? TERRIBLE NEEEWWWSSS POKEY HAS BEEN BLOWN TO SMITHEREEEEEENS DANNY DELFMAN? theres a bomb in his head is this suicide squad?? somebodys getting marrriieeeedddd HE BOUGHT HIM FOR A DOLLAR 95 HEY BIG SHOT im so sorry i have no notes about lex and ethan were NOT listening LDJSLDJSAKDJ sophia is spitfires real name

the lord of the leaderboard, that masked menace here to give his opponents the blues, its OTHO! yooou aaare sooo FUCKIN UGLY so he can duplicate himself? ig that makes sense with the hive shit THEY CAN FLY? HES DOING THE MUSIC SHIT HES DOING THE MUSIC SHIT HE REALLY SAID "TRY ME, BITCH" oh its mind milk not melt PERFECTR HARMOYN??? THE HIVE/? THE HIVE THE HIVW? THATS SO FUCKED UPPPP "I'LL EAT THEM, HANNAH. I'LL EAT THEM...RIGHT. THE FUCK. UP." we gotta get that COIN CHUCK REMINDS ME OF TROY MCCLURE SLDJSALDJASL DO YOU THINK WILEY SOLD HIM and also DO YOU THINK WILEY SHOWED UP LIKE "AND HERE IS MY SON OTHO" OTHO: HELLO..........DAADDY. pokey is contained in otho but if he gets into hannah he can get into the real world and everyone is FUCKED YEAH TELL HER OFF BABY DOES THAT MEAN TGWDLM IS THE TIMELINE WHERE POKEY DID TAKE OVER HANNAH??? THE TGWDLM MOTIFS THIS IS JOIN US AND DIE STOP HURTING HANNAAAHHHHH chuck has plans for otho?? hmmm "Listen to the...noise. Don't you...despise them, Hannah?" "Do not fear. We will end this chaos...and suffering. There will be harmony. Peace. One. Singular. Voice." EEEEEWWWW Sing-along Pokey!!! JOOOIN USSSS i was not ready for pokeys voice to sound like a gregorian chant ljdlJKDSJFLKDS LEX KNEW WEBBY???? he might not be the hungriest, or the cleverest or the trickiest, but hes the most uncompromising. he hates every voice thats not his own. he wants everyone dead but him. pokey: IM NOT RACIST - I HATE EVERYONE EQUALLY webby: so youre quirky racist. "I will not allow your sister or mine to interfere."

"It is not death that awaits you, Hannah, but Godhood. When your power is mine, we will seize Hatchetfield in an instant. We will take this world, and all worlds. Rejoice, Hannah. Your Apotheosis is upon you."

STOP IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SHE STOLE HIS THE THE BUTTON SHE GOT IT GET HIS ASS BLOW HIM UP! BLOW HIM TO SMITHEEEREEENS

NO NOT MY TUMMY NOT THERE NOOO MISS FROGGGY MAY I HAVE A WORD I TOTALLY FORGOT ETHAN WAS HEREBGFDKLFJSDK;FJASK dont trust this fucker

THAT ENDING IM SO NOT OKAY!!!!!!!

#dex says things #nmt2 spoilers

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chaineduploosesoicanfitin · 4 years

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I have some issues about Love Victor that apparently people have addressed, mainly the pacing and underdeveloped relationship between Benji and Victor. BUT there are also a few OTHER (probably minor) things that bothered me that I have to get off my chest.

1. Pilar was probably one of the most interesting characters and they didn’t really DO much with her. They could’ve explored both Pilar’s and Mia’s relationships with their mothers a lot more. They couldve played with the dynamic of one girl having a mom and very suddenly developing trust issues with her vs a girl who doesnt have a mom and has already developed trust issues with women but is now gaining a “mom” very suddenly. Instead, with Pilar, it was “Teenage girl understandably mad at mom for the thing she did. Girl with no mom and trust issues with women talks to her about parents not having it all together. Teenage girl no longer mad at mom but still is kind of. And here’s a few things she does to move the plot along even though nothing really comes out of it.” Mia could’ve been her new best friend (along with Felix) and I think they tried to make it seem like that when she got upset about Victor and the letter. But its hard to believe when they only interacted maybe a few times after that and it wasn’t anything special.

2. There were a lot of plots that just kinda ended?? Like the whole, Pilar finding out about the letter situation. That leads to her asking Benji about the trip. And you WOULD THINK that leads to Benji and Derek breaking up BUT THEY DIDNT EVEN BREAK UP OVER THE KISS!! Benji broke up with him because he didn’t want to be with Derek anymore. They spend an entire episode with her being angry and a detective just so when she confronts VICTOR about the letter, he basically tells her to calm down and she does and....That’s it?? They were seen smiling and such walking home and it makes it seem like she’s no longer mad at him so....what was the point of it??

2a. And the mentioning of Armando doing something so bad was just explained off! They built so much tension for EPISODES! It was made to be such a terrible terrible thing and once its revealed its just kind of accepted? No one really shows any anger towards Armando. Which is fine because what Armando did wasn’t even THAT BAD to begin with?? I mean violence is wrong and everything but at least it was justified in some capacity. But then if thats the case, don’t build tension if something isnt going to come out of it.

2b. It was very minor but they made it a big deal so I noticed it. Why didn’t anyone, specifically Mia, find out about Victor lying about his trip?? He told his family that it was a basketball trip and told Mia it was a trip with his Dad and then NOT ONCE did Mia ask how his trip was. She was LITERALLY talking to Pilar before Victor walks up to her at her locker and she didn’t mention it at all??? Not a “How’d your dad and Victor’s trip go?” Or “what time did Victor and your dad get in last night?” Or even asked how his trip was in front of Pilar. Nothing! If she did, that would’ve been a nice conversation and wouldve created tension about him lying between Mia and Victor AND Pilar and Victor. Then the whole letter thing wouldve been more “intense” and it might’ve drove Victor to Benji more. Instead, he lied, he got away with it. The end. That’s not what you’re supposed to focus on because he had a gay ol’ time in gay ol’ New York!

3. The dialogue, specifically for Lake was atrocious that they basically abandon at some point. I guess because she starts liking Felix. But it was still terrible.

4. Lake was kinda terrible. Liking Felix didn’t make up for it. Her mom being terrible wasn’t an excuse. I liked the fact that she supported Mia in whatever she did however. That’s what best friends are supposed to do. But she was still kinda terrible.

2c because I remembered something else. What happened with the grandparents?? They get told off and they’re suddenly accepting and then.....?????

5. Not enough Sophia Bush................Okay this one is a personal issue because I’m in love with Sophia Bush but STILL

The point is though....Idk the show is FINE but that’s all it is. There are good things about the show and I’m not knocking that! I think Mia is interesting and Felix must be protected at all times! Not to mention the representation of POCs and the presence of a interracial couple that didn’t involve a white character. And Sophia Bush is in it!!! I just can’t sit here and act like its soooo good when its not. It’s fine.

#love victor #love simon #love victor hulu

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purplebenjy · 5 years

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1997 Part Three

Ollie starts kissing his neck and Benjy drops his controller. He laughs when his boyfriend picks it up and places it in his hand.

“Keep playing.”

Benjy sticks out his lower lip “but I wanna kiss you.”

Ollie smiles at him and tugs at the back of Benjy’s white tank top, pulling it over his head and pressing a kiss to his collarbone.

“You can kiss me in a minute. I wanna see how long you can last playing the game with me distracting you.”

A thrill shoots through Benjy at that, Ollie’s light eyes suddenly quite dark.

“Um, okay...”

He hits start, and when his screen pulls up the beginning of the level, Ollie starts too. He settles on his knees between Benjy’s legs, kissing down his chest.

“You’re killing me.

Ollie laughs. “You’re so dramatic.”

Benjy watches as Mario flashes twice before falling off the screen.

“I mean literally. In the game.”

They both laugh but Benjy’s turns into a gasp as Ollie presses a kiss just above the top of his jeans.

“What are you doing?”

“Eyes on the screen, Fenwick.”

Benjy groans slightly but does what he’s told, his hands tightening on the controls when Ollie undos his jeans and presses a kiss to his erection over his boxers.

“Jesus Christ.”

His voice is too loud, it echoes in his room. Ollie pauses.

“You’ve got to be quiet, Benj. Unless you don’t want me to do this?”

“I’ll be quiet, I’ll be quiet. Please don’t stop-“

Ollie smirks at him from his position between his legs. It’s the hottest thing Benjy has ever seen.

“I wont stop if you don’t stop. Keep playing.”

Benjy takes a hand and cups the back of Ollie’s head for a minute, takes a breath, and turns his attention to the screen. Ollie keeps kissing him over his underwear, and Benjy heats him chuckle softly when he grows harder at the attention. Benjy lifts up his hips when Ollie starts tugging at his boxers and soon enough he’s naked, playing fucking Super Mario, and trying not to come right there.

“You get to the checkpoint yet?”

“Uh...yeah?” Benjy says, his voice shaking with lust. Without warning, Ollie licks a stripe up Benjy’s shaft, making him moan.

“Ollie...please-“

He whines before he can stop himself, forcing himself to keep his eyes on the screen. Ollie laughs softly.

“Did you just whine?”

“Um...no?”

“God that was hot. You’re so fucking hot, Benjy.”

A noise of need escapes him but he falls totally silent when Ollies lips close around the head of his cock.

“Oh my god-“

He tries to keep playing, his hands shaking so badly the control can’t keep still. Ollie lets out a breath close to a laugh and his hand catches Benjy’s wrist, gently pushing the controller away. It clatters you the floor loudly, but Benjy doesn’t even notice. His hands fist in Ollie’s hair and Benjy forces himself to keep his eyes open so he can take it all in. Ollie’s breath is hot and wet and his mouth feels so perfect-Benjy doesn’t last long. He watches in disbelief as Ollie swallows his cum and collapses against Benjy’s legs. Benjy flops backwards onto the bed, spent and soon enough he feels Ollie get on the bed with him too. “I didn’t last long”

Ollie picks up his hand and kisses his knuckles.

“That’s okay.”

“I meant in the game.”

Ollie laughs and Benjy lolls his head to the side to smile at him.

“That’s okay too.”

Ollie looks so beautiful just then that Benjy almost wants to cry. His hair is framed perfectly by the dark green of Benjy’s comforter, his smile coming to him easy. His smile that’s just for Benjy. He’s not in love with him, but for the first time, Benjy wonders if he could be some day.

“I’m nicer than you.” Benjy says, sitting up on his elbows. Ollie’s smile clouds with confusion.

“Oh yeah? Why’s that?”

Benjy slides off of the bed onto his knees.

“Cause I’m gonna blow you and I’m not gonna play games.”

Ollie’s laugh seems to get stuck in his throat as Benjy starts undoing his pants.

“Ollie did the FUNNIEST thing yesterday-“

“You never shut up about that kid.” Curt says, cutting Benjy off. “You a fruit for him or something?”

It’s Sunday, which means all of his siblings are there to witness Benjy turn bright red.

“No-“

“You never shut up about him. It’s kind of f*ggy isn’t it? You’ve got a crush, sounds like.”

“Hey man, fuck you.” Robbie says, almost spitting at their step dad, before Benjy can get another word in.

“He was in the middle of a story.”

“Robbie-“ Suki says, her voice dangerous.

“Ma, I’m not gonna let this dipshit you married disrespect my brother like that.”

“Robbie, cool it on the swearing maybe?” Jules says, her hands over Izzie’s ears. She catches Benjy’s eyes and smiles at him.

“What was funny, Benj?”

“Forget it.” He says, looking down at his plate. He feels Mack hit him with her foot but he doesn’t say anything.

“Ma, I dont understand why you got married again.” Leo pipes up, his mouth full of potatoes.

“I wont be disrespected in my own house!” Curt says, his pale skin flushing with anger. Drew laughs, nudging Robbie. “His house, you hear that? Hilarious.”

“Enough!” Suki shouts, causing everyone at the table to turn to her in surprise. She never raised her voice.

“Curt is my husband, and as long as you are in MY home, you will treat him with respect.

“That’s the thing Ma, I don’t exactly respect him.”

“Then you can get the hell out of my house, Robert Muhammad.”

The anger in their mother’s face is unnervingly palpable. Robbie sucks his head, his voice low.

“Alright, alright. I’m sorry.”

“He was picking on Benjy.” Mack speaks for the first time that night. Her hair has purple in it on the bottom, Benjy just noticed. “You never would’ve let that happen before. You wouldn’t let anyone treat us like that. Not before him.”

“Mackenzie-“

His sister pushes her chair back so violently it falls over, her fork clatters onto the plate and she stomps off down the hallway towards the back door.

“I’ll go.” Benjy says, setting her chair upright and following before anyone else can say anything. He walks out onto the back patio and sees his sister sitting beside the pool, her head in her hands. Benjy rolls up the legs of his skinny jeans and crosses the yard, sticking his feet in as he sits beside her. Wordlessly, Mack puts her head on his shoulder.

“I miss dad.”

Benjy hears the tears in her voice without even needing to look at her.

“I know.”

“You don’t, Bb-“ BB standing for Baby Brother, a nickname he’d only recently grown to like. Usually.

He inches away from her, hurt filling him suddenly.

“Just because I dont remember him doesn’t mean I dont miss him! Do you have any idea what it’s like? Living with fucking Curt? It makes me miss Dad so much cause like-I can almost see what it would’ve been like. But it’s not. Not even close. He’s such a dick. And you all treat me like I’m a stupid baby who can’t stand up for myself or-“

“Hey.” His sister turns to him and takes one of his closed fists in her hands. She rubs on the back of his palm until he starts to relax, just like she used to when they were little kids.

“You’re right Benj. I’m sorry. That wasn’t fair of me. I wish he was he here. God. He loved us all so much. You look like him the most I think. He would’ve loved that. He always used to joke that we were all Mom’s clones.”

Benjy smiles slightly, turning so he’s the one resting against his sister. He kicks his feet slightly and makes waves in the pool.

“You can come live with me.”

Benjy snorts. “Funny.”

He glances over at his sister and sees how serious her expression is.

“Mack. You live in a studio apartment.”

“We could make it work.”

“How would I get to school?”

“I could drive you.”

He thinks about it. He lets himself picture it. They’d drive each other nuts, but they’d have a lot of fun. He lets it go.

“I dont want to leave mom alone with him.”

“It’s that bad?”

Benjy shrugs. “I mean they fight constantly? About a bunch of different shit. It’s never gotten you know, physical-“

“I don’t think he’d still be alive if it did.” Mack says with a laugh. “Mom isn’t one of those weak people who stays with someone who hits her.”

Neither of them know it yet, but in a few years, Benjy will play this sentiment over and over in his head. It’ll be the reason he keeps his first ever secret from his sister. Now though, Benjy decides Mack can be the one to know the truth.

“He was right though.”

“Who?”

“Curt. I uh, have a crush on Ollie.”

Mack tucks some of his hair behind his free ear.

“Yeah? Are you...are you gay?”

“Nah.” Benjy sits up to look at her. Her expression is soft but hard to read.

“I’m bisexual. But uh, even though I like girls still I...I think I like boys more?”

He hadn’t told anyone that part. Mack takes his hand and squeezes it.

“Whoever you like is okay as long as they’re nice to you. Do you think Ollie likes you back?”

“Well he gave me a blowjob yesterday so I’m thinking yes?”

“Ew!”

Mack laughs and smacks his shoulder. “Don’t tell me that! You’re like, eight still. You don’t know what blowjobs are.”

“Hmm except I knew what they were then too cause I heard Robbie and Drew talking about if they thought Drew Barrymore would give good ones.”

“Oh my god.”

“He’s my boyfriend, Mack. I mean, as much as he can be with me not uh, telling anyone.”

His sister raises her eyebrows. “Mom doesn’t know?”

Benjy shakes his head. “No uh, I dont want to be the subject of more fights with her and Curt. And uh...”

He didn’t wanna lose his mom too. He’s too afraid to say it. Even to Mack.

“I’m just not ready.”

“So I’m the first person you’ve told?”

“Yeah-“

His sister pulls him into a bone crushing hug, her feet knocking against his in the water.

“I’m so proud of you, BB.”

Benjy squirms out of her grasp and fixes his hair.

“Thanks? I mean, I didnt like, decide this or anything.”

“I know. So what was this funny thing your boyfriend did the other day?”

Benjy feels warmth spread through him at Mack’s easy acceptance. At how she doesn’t even have to tell him that she’ll keep his secret. At how she’s still got her hand over his as she looks at him, waiting to hear his story.

“He uh, used both of our skateboards like skis and made me push him around the park.”

“Jesus. He sounds perfect for you.”

“Benjy!” Ollie waves him over from his car on the street. Instead of skating into the park, Benjy skates up along side him.

“Hey.”

They look each other up and down. Benjy lets himself imagine a time in the future where he could greet him with a kiss.

“You up for an adventure today, Fenwick?

Benjy’s face breaks into a wide grin.

“Always.”

They chat about nothing and everything as Ollie drives them to their mystery destination. Benjy sings along terribly to Nirvana and makes Ollie laugh. As they get closer to the ocean, Benjy’s curiosity gets the best of him.

“Where are we going?”

“We’ve never been on a real date.” Ollie says as he slows at a stop light. “Thought I’d change that with the beach.”

Benjy’s heart stops. A date at the beach. Out in the open. Where people can see them together. Where people can see them together and start talking. Where they’re out in the open.

“Ollie-“

“It doesn’t have to be the beach, we can go anywhere really-“

“I can’t.”

As Benjy says that, they pull into a parking lot covered with sand. Ollie doesn’t say anything until he parks. When he turns to face Benjy, pain is obvious on his face.

“How is this different than us meeting at the park?”

Benjy shifts uncomfortably in his seat. “I dunno. It just is.”

“Is it cause I called it a date?”

Yes.

“No.”

Ollie doesn’t believe him. He nods once, his mouth twisting to the side, upset.

“I’m sorry.” Benjy says, almost a whisper.

“No, I’m sorry. Really.” There’s no malice in Ollie’s voice, which almost makes it worse. He’s not pissed-just sad. “You told me you’re not ready. I shouldn’t have pushed it.”

He backs out of the parking space, Benjy’s hand tentatively comes to cover Ollie’s. He watches him smile slightly in profile.

“I want to go on a beach date with you so badly. So bad, Olls. But I-“

“Can’t. I know, Benj. It’s alright. I should’ve said something before I drove out here.”

They don’t say much on the drive back, but Benjy’s hand never leaves his. He was going to tell Ollie that he’d come out to Mack, but it seemed out of place now. When they get to Benjy’s house, instead of pulling in the driveway, Ollie idles on the curb.

“I need to get home. My dad and Chris are uh, leaving for vacation tonight and I wanna see them before they go.”

Benjy hopes his face doesn’t look as crestfallen as he feels.

“Oh okay.”

Another silence.

“Can I kiss you?”

Ollie sighs and smiles at him.

“Of course you can. I’m not being fair.”

Benjy kisses him deeply.

“Maybe not. But you’re allowed to be upset.”

They kiss for several minutes, the strangeness between them disappearing as they bite at each other’s lips.

“I’d come in, Benj. But Chris and my dad really are leaving.”

Benjy laughs. “I believed you.” He kisses him again as the thought crosses his mind.

“So with your sister at camp...you have the house to yourself?”

Ollie’s eyes glint. “I do.”

“Could uh, I come over? Is it rude to invite myself?”

Ollie kisses him. “Absolutely and absolutely.”

Benjy laughs, his hand closing on the door handle as he gets out to grab his skateboard. He walks back to the open passenger door and looks at Ollie, his eyes flitting to his kiss swollen lips.

“Well good. Cause uh, I’m not ready for a date. But I think I’m ready to be done with this whole “Virgin” thing.”

Ollie groans. “Oh my god.”

“If you’re okay with that.”

“You’re something else, Benjy. You know that?”

Benjy grins at his boyfriend, wishing fiercely he could be everything Ollie needs, but glad he can at least be something else.

“Oh, I’m well aware. See you tomorrow, baby.”

Benjy blows him a kiss and turns on his heel to all but skip up the driveway. When he looks over his shoulder, Ollie is still parked, watching him. He waves, his heart skipping a beat, realizing that before tomorrow was over, everything would be different.

He had no idea how right he was.

#drabble #😬

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fmdxjerome · 6 years

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hello people from old and new! naomi is back in action with her son jerome. i’ve been stuck in my sisters house for the last weeks of my absence because she went on vacation and i had to take care of a sick rabbit who peed everywhere. i might have a disease now at the amount he bit me but what can you do. im joking. you might ask “but naomi doesnt your sister have wifi” yes she do but i’m an anxious wreck so spending my days on a first floor apartment with my sister on the other side of the world w an infected foot had me fucke d upppp boiii but now i’m back in my own home and my sister + her boyfriend are safely home!! foot all fine!! and everyone is calm again!! so!! i can return with a good heart. i’ll be sliding in the dms of the people who bear emoticon’ed me 600 years ago and bc i suck w introducing myself to new people i’ll just hi!!!!! i think when i wake up i’m gonna do a “bio reading” marathon as i write bc i need to appreciate. also shit i need more threads wow i suck might see me replying to some open starters and def need to get back to plotting bc there are some people i’ve been dying to thread with ;^;

its like 6am now so i might b heading 2 bed now but under the cut there will be a reintroduction to jerome (one i promised in januari i believe) as im rewriting his bio (no major things change really its just minor things nd its time for an upgrade) so yes! hello (ims will come tomorrow as well ;3;)

also fact. mullet daddy jaebum is jerome rn dont drag him dont @ him its gone before you know it. probs after idolized its a look tho wow i love- a chic farmer (... the short bangs are tragic tho jerome honey i kno u liked them on wren but ur not wren. jerome: but i- me: no. this this not this jerome: :( ok fine me: fuego

anyway before i pass out here is reintroduction. the triggers are; adoption, racism themes??? like yeah ok!! apologize if this is shit. hope everyone is having a good day though you all are great!

Jerome Gauthier aka Yuddy

-Anti idol

-Has an okay reputation but that’s because he’s smart about things.

-BC eyeing him tho *eyes fake friends with good reputation for him to hang out with* (hmu for fake friend plots. funny the person w the best rep of all actually likes jerome. bless jisoos christ. guess that praying on knees worked out in the end huh jerome. /dont/ sainthood is waiting)

-Talented™. (ask him to write songs for you) (Actually have a few songs in my library i want him to write but not sing so *eyes*)

-Passionate as fuck don’t mess with him in the studio (passionate all over tbh)

-Adopted and in search of his bloodlines

-Hoe but not really

-Actually, scrap that. Nicknames him JerHOEme

-Is actually lovely

-But acts like a shit

-Slips up and is soft to people sometimes before being a complete and utter asshole the next second

-bc soft jerome whOMST i only know deMON

-Suave Fuckboy who’s nonchalant about everything

-French™

-Will call you baby at some point in your life

-Signature smirk

-Egotistic???? Narcissistic??? a lil bit don’t stroke his ego

-Secretive™. not much info on his time in france

-Secretly a dad without children (except for his actual biological son insoo aka chorizo sausage who he goes to play ball with- i mean work on songs in the studio. seriously catch him picking up his son from soccer practice i mean shit no i mean- ok insoo is really his son dont fight me on this.)

-And also has a daughter an Oriental shorthair cat called Edith who he is so soft with he kicks out girls to cuddle with her. (one meow and he’s home)

- we support WISH hating jerome in this household. please people who have girls in WISH dont let them like him (or be a rebel and go against the mothers wishes but you’ve been warned)

-Dont let him get in your pants too like ask wren you dont want that (or i mean with the list of kinks i peeped maybe idk who am i to say what your muse wants or does not want idk im just protecting people from satan)

-Unlikely he’ll get in any pants now anyway tho bc he a proud shopper at papa juliens pizza and y’all some other brand type ish domino lookin asses NAH *throws hands up* rome’s in the house (no but guys. this is his soulmate THIS IS HIM. dISgUStiNG- )

-In 2016 interview took him out of context and it looks like he hates all idol rappers but is not true. He just doesn’t like companies making rap out to be like this thing you can do if you’re pretty and you can’t sing and he doesn’t like it when said pretty idols know nothing of it. he gets the grind but will side eye (benjy nd jerome already have a rivalry bc of this shit thank u interviewer)

-Dating scandals?? EHH. He almost had one with a Japanese model called Momo in the beginning of his career but BC did well of spinning them as friends and he legit had one with his ex last october which?????????? shit she touched his *spoiler* and it was *spoiler* . BC about to ban him from fashion shows damn. yoonah and him have to go to paris fashion week quick

-BC has yet to force him into a relationship tho. but damn he gonna be angry when that ever happens yoo.

-Studied to become a cinematographer. Now is annoying as fuck during recording MV’s bc he butts into everything (BUT thats why his his mvs so AESTHETIC. eye for beauty bois)

-Holler at ya boi if you want a nice mv he’s involved like that

-Also to the girls who have been in an MV with Jerome.. know he probably flirted with you between takes bc during he’s grade a professionalism but he still a ho

-Actual catlady no questions asked (he feeds stray cats and gets cut up by edith when she smells other cats on him rip)

-Actual wife material no questions asked (to quote the great Halit Yilmaz during that time Jerome stood in the kitchen for hours making baklava and other Turkish treats for Halit’s Eid al-Fitr: “Shit, Jerome if you were a girl i’d marry you in a heartbeat.” and its true. we would ALL marry jerome. who says no is lying. )

-Smooth™

-Ok the ego thing btw its weird its an act but hes weird about it dont ask

idk what else to write ok short rundown of his bio as again i’m writing a new one and i cringe every time i look at my old one. im probs forgetting a lot but EYO ITS 6AM WHO CARES

CHILDHOOD age 0 to 10

-Born to a single mom who got fucked over by a smash nd dash dad. (we side eye Ok Chanwook in this household.)

-Moms family discouraged her from taking care of him herself so putting up for adoption it is.

-Very emotional not ok mom boram cry a lot pls. (got v angry too like boi if she ever sees chanwook again he can change his name to no dick larry)

-Adopted by a French couple called Lucas and Daphné (previously named Annelies). pretty kool peeps

-JK racist assholes who fetishize jerome a lot. PLEASE. the yellow fever runs deep. take him away from them,

-Raised in a small town in France and knew 0 Asians growing up. so thats nice

-Loves his adoptive grandpa to death tho (who’s he named after u3u)

-Actually hates the rest lol

-Ok uncle Rémy pretty cool bc he laughs at teen!Jerome shit talking his parents and aunt Camille. She a sweety ;3; a bit odd but a sweety #stanauntCamille

-Basically the people on the Gauthier side and born from Jerome and Clemintine are ok, the rest is shit (except for his dad Lucas. He a Gauthier but he shit)

-Junior/Senior relationship w granpda ;3; “Pépé!!” “Junior!!” *tiny jerome swings around grandpa’s neck* LOVE

-Grandma passed when he was 9. (he loved her very much and would always show her his drawings on her bed ;-;)

-Hard time adjusting at first when he was a tiny toddler. had a lisp talking french. ;3; baby rome

-young jerome had a bad case of the abandonment issues he literally held onto his dads leg for like 30 minutes before the teacher finally peeled him away from him. my smol boi

-Elephants. remember this. is important. /sob

-TLDR; biological mom didnt want to loose him. adoptive parents and dad are fucks. grandpa is kool. jerome had a good childhood until he didnt. thank u ignorance

TEEN YEARS age 10 to 20

-middle school very nice

-j FUCKING KKKKK EMO JEROME INBOUNDDDD

-kids are mean. teens are mean. young!jerome v lonely

-honestly he had no friends. except for like maybe this one kid on his sport called mattheo but he kinda a weeb so uhhhh ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

-the time comes that he feels uncomfortable with everything korean. he already learned korean along side french and english when he was growing up but now distances himself from further learning. he clings to french culture a lot and even to this day he refers to himself as french and european, and rarely refers to himself as korean or asian.

-feels disconnected from both though. its like.. his parents took his korean culture away from him by using it for their own amusement. it was not his to have basically. and french- a lot of people around him give the vibe he’s not “allowed” to call himself fully french. they see him as korean, korean-french but never just french. he feels very misunderstood. lack of identity and just not fitting in

-around this time (or earlier i’m musing still) his cousin Antonin (moms side) kind of fell out on him. like. wow. not good. fucked jerome up a lil. (issues intensify)

-inferiority complex inbound/ is he ok? no he isnt. he starts writing to get his emotions out.

-Blessed Freddy rolled in teen jerome’s life like: guess we need to do history homework together jerome: aren’t you gonna make a ‘do my homework bc you’re asian’ joke freddy: why would i jerome:

-they bond over music, freddy is the one who gets him serious about getting into it (we thank our lord freddy for this gift of life we call singer/songwriter jerome. pray to freddy 10 times a day *srry jisoos christ but ur out*)

-literally young jerome would be a great soundcloud artist in this day and age. he was like joji meets rei brown with more of an rnb tinge. he liked ambient because it calmed him.

-in his old bio thats still up bc im a slow writer his old name was some dumb shit like l.only DUMB its romeles now (get it.. jeROME LESlie gauthier. im smart)

-OK IM GONNA GO QUICKER NOW

-eMO FOR A LONG TIME BC OF LONELINESS AND OTHERING FREDDY IS HIS BEACON OF HOPE WE LOVE FREDDY IN THIS HOUSEHOLD!!!!!!!

-had a big ass fall out with his parents when he was around 15? was like “UHHH FUCK Y’ALL” and moved in with his grandpa (he was very disrespectful like damn boy but you know what. i support)

-best decision of his life because grandpa v lonely after his wife died and Jerome^2 is… so soft.

-Jerome dancing/singing to old tunes and being engrossed with old movies

-Learning how to cook ;3;

-I mean bc his middle and highschool were in Laval he spend a lot of his time w his grandpa already so he already had a bed and ;-; #jerome^2

-Halit rolls into his life. Braces, huge smile, lil prepubescent stash ohmygod. My child.

-BLANC is born. Freddy/Jerome/Halit’s musical trio. Stan the Three Musketeers

-Found his first best friend and a purpose in Freddy. Found a home in Halit. (sob)

-Finds solace in rnb and hiphop. People start noticing him because of it. Writes songs and performs them in café’s. Found his niche. 15 to 19 where his “best” years

-THE BIG MOVE. After a concerned halit mom, a proud freddy mom and a “WHAT THE FUCK JEROME NO DONT GO” jerome mom they pack their bags and PARIS HERE WE COME

-Enter ex who haunts his life, Seo Yumi aka Marie (now model, v pretty, makes me cry)

-Spots her in the summer doing yoga in the park and boi he an assman so he got fucked up (jk he saw her face and was like wHAT love at first sight

-enrolls in film school, meets her there again and wow falls in love hard like wow calm down boy

-Dating~~~v possessive not good at ALL cALM DOWN JEROME

-ok he got his issues nd marie was the first one who openly listened to his problems and understood and made him appreciate his korean heritige bc she’s korean and showed him cultural aspects without the gross fetishizing that came with his parents and he just- he got intense ok. he already got a v intense personality so- still not good tho he needs to dial it down

-she thought so too and like after a year she was !!!! what the fuck. she is not one for serious relationships but jerome was like ehhh why not in the beginning its v nice to hear nd be seen as the most beautiful ok but then it got suffocating but instead of breaking up with him she kept him around. he a safe haven ya know. reliable. someone to built on later. *i wanna say she also didnt break up w him because his emo stories but marie,,, eh...* (funny tho like she got a thing for bad boys so she just “this is the fifth time you called me beautiful just degrade me lil like choke me idk” and jerome just “w-why would i do that you’re beautiful i dont want to hurt you” ah *looks into the future* ohhowthetableshaveturned.mp4 )

-Marie cheated on him the second she got the chance which was when jerome went to america w his bros

-Got offered a job as a songwriter when in ny. Wouldnt think he’d take it but after getting kicked out of school for beating the shit out of the guy marie cheated on him with and with marie out of the picture nothing held him back from starting a new life.

-TLDR; emo era. silver era. emo era 2 emo harder

ADULTHOOD age 20 to now

-Seoul make way for the rise of YUDDY™

-the name yuddy is from the film days of being wild. the character is kinda yuddy-ish too so he saw the film again and yep. thats my name

-Fuck_love.mp3

-Visits his orphanage. they like “nah boi u aint got no papers boi”

-Parents can give him access to his birthmother btw, aren’t doing it lol

-EMO

-Drinks. Sleeps around. Gets a reputation. You kno how it is. (gr8 ride tho. highly recommend. 5 out of 5 stars on yelp)

-SMASH ND DASH. Chanwook is that u??????

-One girl who he got with multiple times reminded him of Marie tho and that fucked him up for a bit (PSST ITS A PLOT WINK SO IF YA GIRL OF AGE IN THE 2013′S HMU BC ITS DRAMATIC HE GHOSTED THE SHIT OUT OF HER)

-Writes a lot of songs, a few for BC (knight baes). BC like *eye emoji* who dat boi who him iz

-Gets sign w BCreate and is like eyy life pretty good

-but lmao he debut and oh who’s that pretty girl promoting that lipstick?? oh.. its marie ;3;

-imfine.jpeg

-Joins main label and literally joins w a blessing stream limbo on spotify

-wgm era was a great era of jerome lmty his hair was great, shared cute personal things, manager was happy, slept with his best friend, was married to a sweet beautiful girl ya know the good stuff 👍 no im not crying you are

-triple fantasy era was awful we dont talk about that he looked like his brother and i’m still emotional about him wow.

-instagram is a great song

-Interviewer: u mention an ex in ur song tell me more Jerome: *SWEATS*

-Marie: my short hair DOES look pretty thank u babe ur red hair was cute too <3<3

-The fact she linked to him now is spook

-But ok he still flirty, still daring, still yuddy™ but definitely less of the whole “sleeping around” thing now bc he… he uhh closetoyou.mp3

TLDR; he turned into his dad but romeo is rising AND HE IS SCARED!!!!!

also never forget jerome is the messiest king in this ok non y’all are as messy as him. he fucked his ex’s friend oK THERE IS NOTHING MORE MESSY. dONT COME FOR HIS CROWN

#Writer Speaks.#ooc. { i dont want to reset the clock again it says 6am in this post its almost 7am i've been here since 4 i'm slower than usual wow }#{ almost 7 its 7.30 i got to stop ok }#{v sleepy now so!! goodnight talk to everyone in a few hours}

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survivor-mesopotamia · 4 years

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Ep. #2 - “Shit ain’t over till the fat lady sings and I didn’t warm my pipes.” (Cameron)

Day 4: Well. I survived my first tribal council of the season, and even though it went exactly according to plan, while I slept my entire day away, I'm still really hesitant to tell myself that I'm doing well on my tribe. I'm really nervous that my tribe mates are playing me, and that I'm really boo boo tha fool here. I called Megan post-tribal, and I was finally able to get some closure on something that happened between us in our personal lives, which felt really good. After that, she asked me about the idol, to which I had responded "Wait, Julian didn't tell you?", which hopefully sows some seeds of doubt in Megan about Julian. Ideally, if the Enlil tribe has to go back to tribal council, the four of us can bear witness to a Megan vs. Julian war. Because unfortunately, the connections I have outside Enlil, are shared with either Julian or Megan. If Megan and Julian are going after each other pre-merge, or during a swap scenario, I don't have to share those connections anymore. After that, Megan and I just talked about the nudes we received during quarantine ~ I then promptly ran to Will to tell him about the potential crack I just formed between Julian and Megan, which was met with genuine excitement. I think I'm really gaining Will's trust, and I think we vibe so well together. Love that guy! Overall, it wasn't a very productive day because I woke up at 4:30p PST. Love that for me, thanks for shading me @ Tribal Bodhi.

going into this scavenger hunt as the tribe that went to tribal last is worrysome. It's a challenge that's fully dependent on our activity, so we are at a serious disadvantage against the other two tribes that get to choose someone less active to sit out. We don't have that luxury. The point/life system eases the blow, however, since we can get less active players 1 life while more active players can get 3. In case we lose, I'm trying to connect with everyone on the tribe. I really don't want to vote anyone out though. I have an alliance with Julian and JJ, and one with Will on the side. Chrissa wants to work with Julian, JJ and myself, and I think Megan and JJ have something on the side. I'm nervous for who would be the target in the vote, and any vote would hurt all of our games collectively. Hopefully we win because the next vote will not be easy AT ALL.

Done w typing this sheet

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jj and zachary are so fucking annoying to this challenge and if i vote for you first at the swap, its probably because youre typing too much during this challenge sorry not sorry xoxo - sincerely johnny a month from now

let me be clear with andrew I was not calling his hosting unfair i was calling the fact that a majority green item giving him a point unfair not the hosting but lack of yellow, also i have a headache i don't feel that good. and I just don't think zach should have had a point for it nothing against hosting obviously i watch a movie trivia thing where literally they have a challenge to challenge any questions that are unfair, that doesn't mean they are calling the question writers or the answer writers unfair.

Zach just won the tribal challenge for us which is fantastic. We can maintain the illusion of a unified tribe longer, which keeps us together in a swap situation, and Zach has clearly painted a challenge target on himself over the last two challenges which will make him go before me if our Triforce ever becomes the minority. I'm really happy with my position in the game right now

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me and monty trying to find the idol and decode this annoying ass video https://imgur.com/a/lu7sbMu

Forgive me father for I have sinned it's been approximately three days since my last confession so far can't complain really we be winning they hating we be riding pretty damn clean I've got a majoritu alliance I didn't start so odds of it falling around me and being the first voted out slim to none thank the sweet baby jesis and all that good shit. Oh well that's all for now

JULIAN’S HOST CHAT GUEST, ZEE:

I am filling in a confessional because you told me to. I am in front of my fan because it's hot. I'm thinking that it seems pretty stupid to ask me for a confessional. Julian's prod chat isn't very interesting because he's distracted.

youtube

also just threw out madison's name to johnny. if this shit backfires on me ill be ):

https://youtu.be/Pqck1gayfJU

https://youtu.be/FMay7NycsPw

yo yo yo homies!!! fuck the scavenger hunt and the mobile Skype app !! Lowkey scared but I think I’m close with everyone on the tribe except madi soooooooooo that’s probably who will go tonight. I’ve connected a lot with Monty and am hoping we can work together closely moving forward 💕not sure how useful my relationship with Zach is going to be come swap/merge bc it seems like he’s ALREADY making himself a target like the big doof he is. More later 💋

https://youtu.be/Qg47yupj1bQ

https://youtu.be/vUK8A1qWVoA

Hello tumblr survivor world! Sorry I didnt confess for episode 1, I was going to but i accidentally exited out of the page when i almost finished writing it. Anyways, it was just a cast assessment for my tribe so tl;dr everyone on my tribe is great and its really sad that we have to vote someone out now. So this whole weekend I was away so I was REALLY worried that I would be voted out since I sat out of the challenge. But after talking to Johnny and Isabelle, it seems like Madison will be voted out tonight. Which is so bad bc this her first game in a year, but hey it's our first vote and it's not me so it's not really the time to make a stand. _________________________________________________________________________________________ Okay I took a break from writing this confessional and there's moreeeeeeeee so part 2 I guess. So I had a call with Johnny and we came up with an alliance of me, him, Isabelle, and Benji. What an iconic alliance, right? But also while Johnny and I talked we got onto the topic of idols and why it is that there hasn't been an idol post yet. I brought up that wayyyyyy back when in Malaysia and some other games around that time, some of the idol hunts were less clear cut. We ended up looking at the blog and clicking the "idol system" tab and it brought us to some weird crab video with audio that sounds like a pokemon cry? Idk part of me thinks its just a joke but I also have to consider that it might be SOMETHING. It said remember to like and subscribe so I sent a screenshot of me liking and subscribing to see if that would do anything but nope. Johnny said he'd do some thinking about it and get back to me later if he figures something out. Also tribal seems super clear cut so I'm a bit less worried now but y'know how it is I can't not worry about tribal.

i just spent $8 on a spectogram and STILL cant find this fucking idol im gonna kms... monty im sorry im steam rolling ahead looking for this thing without telling you, but thank you for the first clue xoxo... if i get stumped in the future ill reach out for SURE (but idt you trust me that much so this seems kinda valid to me) ((FOUR HOURS LATER: i told monty lololol)) ALSO FOR FUCKS SAKE I think madison is gonna go, and truthfully, im fine with it because it's the easiest thing to do due to her poor performance in the past few challenges and just being the least AROUND the tribe, but i know that it'd probably be better for me long term to get rid of abby because i just dont see her as a long term ally for me. i think she's close to JJ and Megan on the other tribe, and she's becoming much more acclimated to the tumblr survivor community that i just BET that she maybe has an additional connection on the rookie tribe. If I can attempt to break that up before we get to a swap, I think that's what im going to have to do figure out if we lose another challenge before a swap... i dont really want to see ANYBODY else go besides abby if im thinking about a second boot. i bet it wont be easy to take her out tho also, if madison goes, this is like...... lowkey vindication for game changers???? last night i talked about this with monty and i was like hmmmm "is it ugly to bring up past game history?" and his response was "not if it's within the same series" .... so. vindication

---

omg i just told madison how to find the idol system thing i hope she doesnt tell anyone i told her about it LMAO........ this almost seems too easy.i got added to two alliances today. why do i not feel safe? is it me going? WTF IS GOING ON

excited to be first boot because no one will TALK TO ME!

Things haven’t changed much since my last confessional! As far as I know the tribe hasn’t started into alliances and we’re all riding some excitement at having so far avoided tribal. I think the rest of the tribe and I are all feeling good and just focusing on making the tribe switch without losing any members.

from round 2 https://youtu.be/fk002uG2HoI

Hi sorry I forgot to do a confessional this round so this will be short imma just say a few things 1. I don’t trust julian one bit he can stop being shady to me 2. I can’t believe we aren’t going to tribal I’m so fkn happy i was able to pull out the win for our tribe because I didn’t want to lose anybody else 3. I love and adore will with all of my being and he’s my number 1 ally right now 4. I find it highly doubtful that there’s only one idol in this game and that you can’t find it until merge but that’s as far as I can get in the idol search for now so I guess there’s nothing I can do about it 5. I’m still having fun can’t wait to fuck up another flash game yay!!!

My Purple edit is amazing right now. But having played more games than most of these newbies, I have decided to take on the role of teacher and becoming more of a "role model" for these newbies. I feel like I have the closest bond with Zach, and I need to get a little closer with Collin. I have Grace from past games, and then there are the others who I do not really have any strong bonds with at the moment. I guess I need to start going to them more and show that I want to work with them.

https://youtu.be/yhwXzqrTcsA Confessional 2 for round 2

https://youtu.be/TVnpwqc8XLY

Madison voted out 6-1

#nomorethings

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flockofdoves · 4 years

Text

was trying to think of a way to divide up ocs on toyhouse so i don’t get too embarrassed about them yesterday but then it turned into just trying to list like every character i’ve ever made the vast majority of them i’d never put on toyhouse lol. but this was fun for myself even though i definitely forgot chracters and even whole stories from when i was younger

kinda old (definitely need updating they’re from when i was 17/18 and haven’t done much in recent years but nonetheless are my most recent ocs and i would probably like to do something with them someday still):

all the alienated characters - raul and michael primarily, also side characters like their relatives (lennie, joaquin, marcell, maybe also shinsuke, natalia, nina, naomi, hana, leela, etc) and friends (still need to name them lol) etc

justicia (less set on doing her story any time soon compared to alienated, but still theres something to it i might want to work with someday)

pretty old (like i was 16-17)

gf debate characters (this is actually older than a lot of the ones i list as even older in this list but i kept working on them til i was like 17 so they hold up better even if i don’t want to finish making their story anymore) - isaac, micah (micah is literally kinda from when i was 12 lol but i brought her to like 3 different stories and she was a boy in the first one too so shes basically not that character anymore), and then side characters like mirabel (originated in same story at 12 as micah), ayçin, anna, micahs mom and her wife, micahs cousin (another one from that old story) etc

those ocs that literally none of them have names or barely personalities i only ever did character sketches and basic concepts but its like a ghost story thing i was gonna do - 12 y/o baby butch protag, the ghost girl, baby butch’s trans girl cousin, cousins trans guy friend

really old (characters from when i was like 14-15 that did not really develop much from there. most of these are characters i have had fun with and maybe drawn since but are goofy and don’t hold up in a lot of aspects and most of them i’ll probably never pick up for stories again)

football lesbians - monica, wanda, and rania

pigeon magical girls (technically maybe i actually finished a very abbreviated version of their origin story for a school art project when i was 15 lol but i planned to do more back then and now i dont want to) - zehra, ronni, the pigeon, probably not amy and zoë that was just a cameo for myself of ocs from when i was like 11 lol

naomi’s story (this one i might actually want to do something with someday, i wrote a short story about it plus a bit more, but i have to make some serious changes i don’t really think i thought of some of the implications of some stuff in it before) - just naomi and the ghost basically. not to be confused with naomi in alienated who is michael’s sister they are not at all the same person

assorted characters that never really had a story - mels and cvijeta, charlotte (thought about putting her in football lesbians. she does basketball but. jock wlw you know)

really really old (characters from late middle school, like 13-14)

uhhh that wizards story. it never had a name idk. i still kinda like them though tbh even if i’ll never do anything with them anymore - tess, ali, nataline, brandy, mo, remora, cnidarian

really really really old (characters from the middle of middle school, like 12-13. at this point my recollection of what came before what might be kinda off tho)

that fae folk in pennsylvania and ohio story - emilia, ilana, micah (first version! lol), mirabel, that boy that i just hate and don’t remember the name of and resent making a character that had a crush on micah, micahs cousin, darling/angel (a faerie that just went by terms of endearment as if they were names), uhhh the second group of characters in a different more rural town i tried to write that i dont remember the names of

haunted victorian house story - benji, aisha, elizabeth

updated onex arget (fantasy world i wrote about a lot when i was in elementary school) story - nai, rieae

idk this story never had a name and barely a plot beyond ivy and victor becoming friends and venting to each other - victor, ivy, miles, maitê

forks and spoons (story i improvised with my little cousin who was like 8 at the time lol) - florimundi(?), i’m forgetting literally all 3 of the other characters names lol (maybe reese and victor for two of them??? but maybe not bc those are also other very old characters that idk if i reused the names of)

theo and ted - theoni and theodore (aka theo and ted!), oh also that guy they meet who wears like. a trench coat iirc

super old (characters from the later half of the 6th grade and early 7th, like 12ish)

really dumb story about a closeted trans person with did getting transformation powers - i actually dont remember the main character and their main other alters names anymore, i remember the other character they had a crush on stephan though

all those characters in bands that i never actually could settle on a story for beyond a variety of interpersonal drama. very inspired by the webcomic jenny hanniver tbh - avery, mark, etti, adrian, xavier, pepper, uhhh theres literally So Many more of them and also so many i dont remember the names of anymore but just for some that come to mind. that periwinkle colored hair in a bowl cut character that always wore a beanie who was in avery’s band whos names on the tip of my tongue (maybe that was etti and the character i’m calling etti was called something else?? maybe victoria? maybe andy? maybe andy was an entirely different 3rd character?? idk. actually yeah i’m positive bowlcut character was etti rereading this), xaviers ex-boyfriend who was obsessed with homestuck (lmao), that guy with red hair i accidentally directly ripped off the design of some jenny hanniver character, that goth guy with braces and glasses (maybe he wasnt in this?), that screamo band with 2 lead singers, that guy with brown hair that said he was straight with an exception (msfdkjghhsfd god), that person with the emo haircut in flame colors, this literally is not even all the characters lol

extremely old (largely from 6th grade, like age 11ish. weird period of time where i suddenly wanted to write about romance but thought it had to be straight but then very quickly was like ‘wait actually nvm i have a laptop now and think i’m bicurious i’m only gonna write about gay people)

gsa story (this might have been the summer before 7th actually but it feels distinctly before the other stuff in the last category so idk maybe just my whole impression of when i made things for middle school is off) - emmy(?), allie(?), noah(???), some other kid, i think noah(?) or the other kid got reused to be the guy i regretted making a part of that faerie story who liked old micah lol, maybe more kids, their teacher

idk that kid with blue hair and black eyes with white irises and his sister

middle school lesbians - leah and cass

lesbian who works in food service and there were weird references to comic books but filtered through me referencing an obscure emo humor youtube channel that made jokes about comics i’d never read - amy, zoë, amy’s straight best friend i dont remember the name of??

tosca (this wasnt straight romance but it was like the last thing pre me always having lgbt main characters) - idk. there were two characters i drew like once. theres nothing to note about this except wanting to make it is what made me learn about webcomics

that story i posted the first chapter of on quibblo about a hippie girl (somehow in 2010?? dont ask me) and an emo boy liking each other before abandoning to never write about cishet romance again. didnt even get to the romance part lol - i forget her name. maybe it was april? maybe it was florimundi and i reused it later for another character, nix, reese (her goth lesbian best friend. thank god for reese)

first attempt at straight romance. also about like. idk. fantastical powers in clouds in providence rhode island - selia, shay, cassandra, selias other friend i forget the name of??

ancient (literally elementary school ocs. obviously theres a lot of grades covered here but its just my memory and ability to reference this is so loose idk if i could even try to accurately divide it further)

shadow magic - mezzaluna, her aunt tabby(?), alexa

a, j, & j (barely counts i didnt do anything with them. those are the only characters also)

arine (some of these characters might not be arine characters and just from other onex arget (fantasy world i wrote a bunch of stories in and made a shitty conlang for and stuff) stories but i just dont really remember) - lia, lias sister, dibujurm, that other fantastical creature who was friends with dibujurm i forget the name of that kinda looked like calcifer from howls moving castle but fuzzy not an actual fire (maybe isigo??), emiaelaesa, that obnoxious prince (i think the story was called arine bc that was his name?), the prince’s servant, there absolutely were more

the musical adventures of shiri and don - shiri, don, some evil villain and his henchmen

rosington (there were like no characters besides her. weird junie b jones rip off with nonsensical humor to everyone but me)

that tree prophecy story (maybe set in onex arget?) - nico, emi (?? maybe not her name), their uncle (i forget his name, maybe lester?), their uncles shipmates, that fortune teller

idk some kid that goes on a scavenger hunt to solve a mystery on vacation in like bermuda or something where he meets some quirky girl character who helps him. thats all

i had some characters that started out as me trying to draw characters from the book hoot by carl hiaasen but for some reason then turned into my own ocs and looked nothing like those characters were described and also basically had nothing to do with them in personality and action beyond name after a while. - beatrice and napoleon. this was in a phase where i got a ‘how to draw anime’ book and napoleon straight up looked like a yugioh character his hair was ridiculous

those fake siblings i made up and lied to a substitute teacher in kindergarten about me having 6 siblings because of for absolutely no reason even though i only have one sibling irl

imaginary friends i shared with my brother and then made stories about - theres so many of these, the most important though was chick-chick-chick. who was a very small chick who wore a top hat. and then he had a family(?) of infinitely smaller chicks (chick-chick-chick-chick, for example) the more “chicks” you added to the name

#my ocs #cpost

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kpop-reactionsandtexts · 7 years

Text

BIG reaction to falling in love with their doctor

I wasn't really sure how you wanted me to write this and I got a little carried away but I hope you enjoy it never the less :)

J-hoon when he first injured his knee on stage he felt like it was the end of the world. he hates not being able to dance and hospitals always have the worst coffee, so your first meeting with him consists of him being grumpy and you hoping he can leave soon so that he stops ruining your mood as well as other around you. when he hears you say that he’d have to come back every few days for you to check how its healing you could swear his scowl got even bigger. slowly over time after about 10 meetings for the first time you saw him smile in your direction wen he walked in for his check up, you were so shocked you didn’t know how to react. and thats when the talking started. he talks a lot when he’s comfortable/ happy and soon whilst you were examining his knee you could barely get him to shut up long enough to tell him his progress. as soon as he heard the words that he was free to go and dance again he felt an overwhelming sadness, despite being happy to be able to dance again. after about a week he realised that he was sad because he missed meeting with you every few days, realising he also had feelings for you. when you exit the hospital after your shift the next day you find yourself face to face with him, a bunch of flowers and the biggest smile you’ve ever seen on him.

Benji no one likes to be injured but he found out quickly enough that as long as you were treating him he was more than happy to go back for check ups and what not. you two would always spend more time with him asking you personal questions and you answering the than actually checking up on him. when he found out you wanted to learn english he jumped at the chance to see you outside of checkups by offering to teach you. he didnt realise that the reason he wanted to spend so much time with you was being he had fallen in love with you until one of the members started teasing him about it. after that he became quite shy around you, hoping he wasn’t coming on too strong. when you told him you were going to take an exam in english language he was over the moon as it meant he could meet you more often to “teach” you more. after you pass your exam ad you suggest the two of you go out to dinner together to celebrate he realises just how deeply he’s fallen for you. he asks you out in english claiming he was just testing you.

Gunmin after falling on stage and hitting his head he’s rushed to the doctor on site backstage and the only thought he has is that you’re the most beautiful person he’s ever met, he tells you so but you don’t believe him as he just got a head injury and people say all sorts of weird things when they hit their heads. you decide it would be best to keep him overnight to monitor his progress allowing you to check up on him often, worried that although he appears fine now he can still have bad after effects. you sit with him for a long time, checking how he feels and doing a few tests every few hours. after a while he falls asleep and you sit watching him before leaving to check up on a few other patients. your shift finishes before he wakes up and you leave to go home and forget about a beautiful face who wont remember you in the morning. when he wakes up a different doctor checks up on him and discharges him, but before he leaves he asks for your name and your next shit time. when you come back on your next shift you see him standing by the reception desk, walking over to see if he’s okay and find out why he’s back he tells you he’s having problems with seeing straight, you take him through to one of the rooms to do a check up when he stops you, saying he only came back to check if you were as beautiful as he remembered. at that moment he realises he fell for you after just one meeting and asks if you can give him the chance to let you fall for him just like he did.

Minpyo not being a stranger to heath problems minpyo has visited your clinic many times during his career, after a while of seeing different doctors he realises that he feels more comfortable with you and would start requesting to see you whenever he was there. the more you saw him the more you guys became friends instead of just having a doctor-patient relationship. you started to fall for his sweet personality the more you learnt about him and realising this you decided to stop being his doctor thinking that the feelings were one sided. after a few visits he comes in earlier than usual and sees you literally dive behind some equipment to stop him from seeing you, he catches on that you’re purposefully avoiding him and it upsets him although he can’t work out why. it isn’t until he opens up to his new doctor that he realises the reason you avoiding him hurt so much was because he had fallen in love with you without even realising it. together with his new doctor they come up with a plan to get you to see him so that he can ask you out, deciding to be extreme since you started avoiding him without explanation. when you come in and have the receptionist tell you that he’s in a critical state in one of the rooms upstairs you panic and run to him, hoping that he’d be okay regardless what happened. when you enter the room to see him sat on the bed perfectly healthy and surrounded by flowers and candles you realise maybe your feelings for I’m aren’t as one sided as they seemed.

Heedo he’s the most closed off member when it comes to talking about feelings and so when he realises that he might be in love with the companies on call doctor he panics not knowing how to deal with a situation like this. he manages to keep the feelings to himself watching you work from afar for a long time before he tells you how he feels. a few times you teated him and other members, usually with minor injuries whilst touring, and every time he watched you work he fell just a little bit more in love with you. when you went on tour with them for the first time out of korea he took it as a chance to get to know you better, finding out about your family and interests but not once offering up information about himself. he would stay that way until there was an incident that left you being hospitalised yourself. when he heard the news and rushed to check up on you he realised that in that moment he could have lost you forever and you would never had known how he felt about you. at the hospital whilst he thought you were asleep he opened up completely telling you how he felt and how had it is for him to talk about his emotions, not realising you could hear every word but were too tired to respond. you fall asleep to his soothing voice. when you wake up the next morning you decide to take matters into your own hands and ask him out yourself, telling him that you weren’t good with talking about emotions either and so you can both work on that together over dinner.

Thanks for reading! Requests are open :)

#kpop #kpop reactions #kpop requests #BIG #boys in groove #big reaction #big request #boys in groove reaction #boys in groove request #requests are open #thanks for reading #my reactions

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poeplepound · 7 years

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desr girlfriend

(the person im w rn is nonbinary so im gonna do the “dear datemate” one just bc i dont wanna misgender them Whoops - also , this is gonna be hard for me to post publicly but ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ imma do it lol)

aaaaa!! i remember, back in last may i guess (maybe your last day of school) i wrote you a love letter and put a pablo neruda poem on the back of it and i made a mixtape but it didnt burn properly and didnt work but i didnt realize until after i gave it to you, and i felt really bad n inept bc of it but i think its okay its the thought that counts right? but anyway, ive wanted to write u another love letter since then, and i almost brought you one to choir tour but i didnt wanna have you read it and then see me every day for a week after that because im gay and get embarrassed easily (lol u kno) and i figure that i couldve given it to you at the airport on saturday before i left but yknow ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ im a dweeb and didnt think of that til nowim sorry i left the airport without saying a proper goodbye - evan was there and he was rushing me and i didnt know if your family would be there for you n reina and i didnt wanna get you in trouble and im sorry bc i shouldve said goodby at the gate before i went to baggage claim bc you deserved a real goodbye

ur in florida rn for zoo school stuff n im really really really excited for you bc you deserve to do cool ass shit like that that’ll make u happy !!!! and the clothes u got for zoo school are really cute too and i love them and i love you and just !! aa !!

benji uve honestly ,,, gee , you n me have gone through some shit i guess u could say, and ive gone through so many nights of screaming crying into friend’s bedsheets because i find myself feeling like i hate you, like when i found out you were with eugene and like when you didnt say hi to me at rrr and all those times i would message u being clingy and annoying even though i knew we couldnt talk , like , ill feel like i hate you and then ill hate myself for feeling like that bc even though things have been really bad, youre still the one person that makes me happiest and the one person i love the most

you make me happy flap and literally Nothing else does and just, everything about you is incredible and intriguing and lovely and ethereal and i just ! wish you were happier and had more good things in your life and i wish things werent how they are bc i wanna see you and i wanna hold ur hand and watch tangled together and i just ):

i think i mostly want things to be like they used to be? i want your mom n me to be able to talk like we did at tijuana garage in april last year about teachers who are weirdly into occult films and when she jokingly said i should move into ur house bc i notice where earbuds are and when we last let the dogs out and i wish things were how they were when reina first asked if we were dating bc were bad at hiding it and i wish i could lay with you and be your blanket like in that hotel room on tour and i just wish being with you was easier because i love you and loving you is so easy for me and thats incredible

#q #this is Really gay #gee #benjo

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