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k2ntoss · 4 months

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im quite literally in class rn but the jason brain rot is going so strong, so all i can think of is trying to convince Jay to stay home from patrol for just one(1) night because he's working too hard

like you barely see him anymore cuz he's either out running around as Red Hood or passed the fuck out in bed throughout the day, and just having enough of it and just like, getting down and giving him the absolute best head of his life to convince him to stay in (and he does, but only because he's literally physically unable to afterwards, like legs shaky and eyes glazed over, maybe just a little bit subby too?) ughhh god i need him so baddd 😭

- your friendly neighbourhood 🦊

after too many days i'm back, i've been too low on inspiration and i hate that but i read again this today while i was at work and i GIGGLED TOO HARD, 🦊 noonie i'm gonna find you (and kiss your brain) soooo as an apology for being off a few days, here we have a slightly long smutty thing with my sweet pretty boy jay <3

it's been probably over a month since jason only came back home to pass out on the bed, he barely woke up to eat something and do one or another stuff, even bruce was a bit worried about his health but he didn't pushed on it further.

once again night falls and jay is getting all geared up on your room, tactical pants, boots and that black compression shirt that always made your mouth water on when you came in, a small pout on your lips at the sight of your too tired boyfriend "jay... you look like you could use a night off" your voice is soft and so tempting for jason, because the idea of cuddling next to you and rest seemed to be what he needed more than anything.

"princess, you know i can't do that" jason sighs, there's a glimpse of want on his eyes and it's everything your brain needs to come up with a method to convince him and you are 90% sure it will work so it takes you less than a second to walk to him, letting yourself fall to the floor right between his legs.

the sight from that point is even more encouraging because jason looks so much intimidating like that, even when he frowns totally confused at your actions "but you work way too much, jay" and he knows what you're up too so his look changes from questioning to warning and oh, if it doesn't turn you on more because you know that you have the power to turn him into a puddle "you can stay home tonight, i can call dick to tell him you're sick and that you need to rest" your head lays on his thigh as one of your hand traces softly his stomach, fingers trailing over his abs while your eyes look into his.

"sweetheart, i can't do that–" jason starts, he sounds like he's having the hardest time of his life trying to tell you 'no' and it is as your fingers start to undo the buttons of his pants and his belt, caressing him over his boxers and feeling him reacting to your touch. there's a soft growl that escapes his lips, making you sit properly on your knees and looking up at your boyfriend for him to give into your (and his) needs just for him to move so you can pull his pants down enough to see his cock grow harder under your subtle strokes.

"you need to rest, at least one night" there's that pout on your lips again and that innocent tone that he doesn't buy because how could he when you start to slide your hand under his boxers and smile when his hard shaft is completely at your mercy, hand going up and down before you lean in to press a playful kiss on his tip, it sends a jolt through his spine and he can't help the low moan that slips past his lips when your tongue traces his length before taking the head between your lips.

it's always easy for jason to get lost on how good you make him feel, even when it comes to the times he needs to do something important so here he is, one of his hands on the back of your head while you suck slowly on him not taking in too much, your hand traces the veins on the bottom of his cock before stroking it "god damn, baby... you look so good on your knees for me" his voice is hoarse and he tries to pull you down on him just to be met with a playful look from you.

"c'mon, let me do this by myself" you speak, your lips shiny as you smile at jason, his dick pressed against your cheek and he nods "that's a good boy" and the way he swallows hard makes you chuckle before your mouth wraps around his shaft. jason keeps his hands next to his legs, the way you called him a good boy made him feel like he could cum just with your touch but it would have been pretty pathetic so he holds back. his eyes are fixed on the way your head bobs, the lewd noises your mouth makes everytime his head touches your throat and he has to resist the urge to fuck your face.

there's a pop that comes out of your lips when you let go of his cock, hand still fisted around him while you pull down the front of your sleeveless top, tits spilling out for him to look. the moan that escapes his lips is unholy when you put his dick between your breasts, tongue playing with his slit while you stroke him like that and he feels in heaven "you look so good like that, baby..." your words are sweet, he loves the way it feels because he could melt right there and it's what he needs to forget about anything else. he whimpers at the second you smirk, pulling away to grab hold of him and spitting on his shaft before taking it into your mouth again, this time sucking and licking on it with more urge.

you can feel him throb on your tongue, making you pull away again "such a pretty boy, aren't you? need to cum, baby? go ahead, good boys deserve to be rewarded" you coo him right before your mouth is wrapping him again and he can't help it this time, thrusting into your throat in a needy move before you can feel him shooting his load in a whiny moan, he looks so pretty like that and it makes you want to keep making him squirm.

it takes you nothing to stand up and go sit on his lap, his body trembles under your touch and the load you've been holding on your mouth falls over your tits when you open your mouth and stick your tongue out before you pull his head towards your breasts "feel better now, baby?" you ask with a small smirk when jason hums in response, his mouth too busy on one of your nipples as he sucks while looking at you from under his eyelashes, pretty green eyes glazed as he whines softly "wanna stay home for tonight?"

"yes, mommy..." he can barely speak without sounding too slurred from how tired he felt from all the extra work and the head you just gave him.

"fine, i'll call dick to tell him you're sick"

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formosusiniquis · 1 year

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inspired by this post by @ruelogy

ao3

Eddie knows he got to Hawkins a little later than everyone else. He wasn't born and raised in the six miles of town with the same eight people his whole life. There was a whole social services kerfuffle that meant he didn't land in this small town hell hole until he was the ancient age of thirteen. He knows he's destined to forever be the freaky new kid with the shaved head and the group home eyes who joined in the eighth grade. But even without all that he is fucking positive that there was no Henderson in any of his three graduating classes.

Yet here Henderson the supposed younger sits painting him a mystery week after week. Steve said this, Steve did that, Steve may very well be a delusion if the way the others giggle and sigh every time he gets brought up is any indication. Cause it goes like this: Henderson comma Dustin is a fellow Hawkins transplant. Son of a single mother -- divorced or widowed, Eddie knows enough now to be sure that fueled the Hawkins gossip mill for weeks -- who brought her young son with her. Son, singular. Dustin joined the first grade class of Michael Wheeler, Lucas Sinclair, and William Byers and that is as they say history. If there had been sons, plural, this mysterious older brother should have by all of Eddie's figurings joined Hawkins junior high right around the same time as a miserable Eddie. There should have been whispers about two new kids, there should have been someone for him to commiserate with, befriend.

Yet week after week young Dustin sits at Hellfire spinning yarns of a brother who was, what, homeschooled? Sent to a private military academy? Boarding school? Stayed at home with the mysterious father that Dustin doesn't mention -- and Eddie knows enough about fathers that go unmentioned not to break the silence -- but suddenly decided after he graduated to come join his mother and brother in Hawkins? Cause the thing is, Hawkins isn't that big. If pressed he's pretty sure he could name at least 90% of both of the classes he was supposed to graduate with and at least 75% of the group he's stuck with this year. He'd at the very least recognize them on sight, and not just cause he's dealt to the greater portion of the high school. Eddie pays attention, there are only like 400 students at the high school at any time, he should by all accounts be able to say, "Oh yeah that scrawny, bespectacled loser is Steve Henderson."

Except maybe there is no Steve Henderson, he's already faintly sure there's no Suzie so what's one more fictional friend from Dustin Henderson. Maybe this Steve is just the product of a fractured mind brought on by too much hands on parenting. Eddie knows people think all of his bad behavior is the product of underparenting, but if the opposite causes imaginary siblings he'll take the hand he got thank you very much.

Cause, sure he's doing his best to be third time lucky with this whole high school thing. He does know that compared to the should be starry eyed, but actually unsettlingly wary freshmen he is an ancient being of chaos. Yes, he feels every ounce of the five year gap between 19 and 14 when he speaks to them. But beyond all of that, he is still young. Still capable of swooning now and then; and the now is when Dustin describes his big brother and the then was all the other times Henderson the older has been detailed.

"Well that's cause I'm not really sorry, Mike," Henderson is on a tear already when he makes it to Hellfire, "I told you I have plans already."

"It's not that big a deal," Lucas placates, "we can do it another day."

"My parents won't be out of town another day," Mike sneers, "Will, you wouldn't ditch out on an all night Nintendo marathon for a date with Steve would you?" He says it like Will is the voice of the populace or something.

Maybe he is, and going by the way Will flushes a bright pink up to his bowlcut the voice of the people would in fact rather go out with Steve Henderson than hang out in a basement playing video games.

"It's not a date, he's my brother, and yeah dude I'm gonna skip out on watching you scream at Mario to go to an all night Stephen King movie marathon." Dustin says.

And swoon. That sounds like a dream.

"Like Steve would ever do something that cool, you can just say your mom won't let you come over cause my parents aren't gonna be home." Mike is surlier than usual, a trait he has noticed happens a lot when Henderson the elder gets broached. Eddie's theories range from misplaced sibling jealousy to repressed queer crush on Steve.

"C'mon kiddies save the tantrums for your mommies," he doesn't have a taste for it regardless of the answer, puberty is a bitch he's glad to be seeing the back of and Wheeler can go from being an angel to the kind of brat you do want to narc on just a little. "The rest of us have hoards to slay, maidens to save, things that don't involve listening to your play date fall apart."

He desperately wants to ask Henderson where they're movie night is taking place, because it sounds amazing and not at all because he wants to finally see this mysterious brother.

“It wasn’t even mine!” Henderson is moaning by the time Eddie makes it from O’Donnells to the cafeteria. He wasn’t that late, five minutes to plead his case for his grade at most, but Henderson could monologue with the best of them and it took about as much to get the kid going as it did Eddie, which was saying something.

“And you and Erica made fun of what was under my bed.” Lucas says with a smirk and a roll of his eyes.

“What was under your bed?” Will asks.

“We are not going to let Dustin get out of the fact that his Mom found his Star Trek porn that easily,” Mike shrieks, he sounds like he’s trying to mind his volume but it’s still too loud for a public venue, “You gave me shit for weeks about that Penthouse you found under my bed.”

“We gave you shit because you stole it from your dad,” Lucas corrects, not that anyone but Eddie hears it.

Cause as Lucas speaks Dustin is shouting, “It wasn’t fucking mine! It has to be Steve’s but try telling my mom anything about her favorite son.”

Three sets of disbeliving eyes look over at Dustin, but it’s Mike who says, “There’s no fucking way anyone is gonna believe it was Steve’s dude, just give it up.”

“I don’t even like Star Trek that much!”

Eddie has been having dreams of a mystery boy with a gorgeous head of hair and Dustin’s sweet smile. He likes horror but will pretend to get scared so he has a reason to hide his face in Eddie’s neck, and when he gets there he’s a biter. “Now, now Henderson, what kind of self-respecting nerd doesn’t enjoy the dulcet tones of Mr. Spock.”

Henderson wrinkles his little nose, what a twerp or maybe he’s thinking of his brother’s zine again, “It’s okay, but who goes to sci-fi for philosophy when you could watch space battles and deathstars.”

Eddie spares a prayer for Dustin’s English grade. “Well at least one Henderson has taste.”

He’s never had a younger sibling in Hellfire before, Gareth and Joey are only children and Jeff is way older than his miracle baby sister, so it is a treat to watch the way Henderson goes red, white, and then green as he cycles through a series of emotions surrounding his brother so fast it gives Eddie a headache.

“Dude, he probably bought it for you not knowing what it was,” Mike says, “it’s not like Steve is watching Star Trek.”

"You didn't see it."

"Maybe it was a prank?"

Eddie tunes them out, returning to the Steve in his imagination. They're slipping out of the movie they just finished, the one they bought tickets for, Steve giggles -- Eddie thinks he'd have a nice laugh, thinks he makes his brother laugh a lot -- and tugs him into The Voyage Home. "You gonna think of your favorite captain while we hide in the back row, Stevie?"

"Kirk is an Admiral now, he has been for three movies. Some fan you are."

He wonders if it’s creepy, this mental file he’s compiling on Henderson’s brother. It’s not like he knows the guy, truly a backwards fucking miracle in this two stoplight nothing of a town, but Eddies’ always liked something that he can sink his teeth into and pull apart. That’s what Steve Henderson feels like to him, like if a rubix cube was also a steak. He’s lost track of the metaphor in his own head, it’s whatever.

Cause Steve Henderson loves horror movies, but watches sappy romance flicks with his mom when they both have the same day off. Steve Henderson’s favorite color is yellow, but he only wears it on days that he can barely get out of bed; Dustin says that like it’s a warning sign for the others “Steve has his yellow sweater on today,” explaining away his absence at the arcade that afternoon. Steve Henderson could have any girl he wants -- this factoid Eddie takes with a salt, lime, and tequila -- but he never goes on dates anymore and only hangs out with his best friend and coworker. Steve Henderson baked a brownie so good Jeff moaned in the middle of Hellfire but can only over or undercook pasta when he tries.

Dustin loves his brother. Dustin thinks he’s the worst person to ever grace this side of the planet.

That Eddie thinks is at least typical for siblings, barring the Byers who seem to be so close knit they’d put the Bradys to shame.

“Henderson, my man, why the long face? We’re about to begin the most dangerous leg of your quest yet!” Hellfire was getting a delayed start -- the drama club was actually using their prop closet, go figure -- it was just him and Henderson lurking outside so Eddie did have to find his fun where he could get it.

“Steve and Robin went up to Indianapolis and they’re gonna be gone the whole weekend.” And yeah, he probably could have guessed it was about big brother Henderson. Dusty has the cutest case of hero worship when he wasn’t wishing big brother dead. “They say they aren’t dating, and it’s just for her birthday, but a weekend trip seriously it screams romance.”

“And you’re mad they didn’t bring you?”

“I could have been out of the way! Do you know the kind of specialty tech shops they have up there? I need some things you can't get in Hawkins to improve Cerebro and it's twice as much to get them mail order. I could make myself scarce for a couple hours so they can get it on.

He smacks the bill of Dustin’s cap, knocking it down over his eyes, but nobly refrains from giving him a noogie, “Dusty if you ever want to pop your little Mormon girl’s cherry, maybe don’t say shit like ‘get it on.’”

“Suzie is an angel, don’t be crude, man.” Dustin’s hands are quick as they smack him away, that must be another little brother trait.

“An angel, huh, another point in the ‘girlfriend isn’t real’ category. How many imaginary friends do you have, kid? A girlfriend in Utah and a brother that no one but your party has seen.”

The rest of Hellfire starts to trickle in, having used their time waiting for their table more wisely than Eddie has. Dustin’s comment is delayed only momentarily as he says hi to the rest of the freshmen that he definitely saw only a few minutes ago. “For the record, Suzie is very real. And you…” It’s the way he trails off that makes Eddie nervous, the way a light goes on in his eyes that sets the hair at the back of his neck on end. His danger instincts are finely honed and that's the same, 'I'm smarter than you look' Henderson was wearing when he managed to sniff out half the traps Eddie had laid out last session. "You should meet Steve, I bet I could get him to pick us up next week instead of Nancy."

He thinks this must be what the raccoons behind the trailer park feel like. The obvious trap of the shiny silver cage that's been baited so sweet it's hard to resist walking in anyway. "Sure, Henderson, tell the mysterious brother to stop by. Have him bring one of those zines that definitely belongs to him."

Dustin is especially vicious as dispatches with every creature that Eddie throws at him that day. It’s hard to be that upset, he’s feeling pretty fat and happy sitting in whatever animal control rodent trap Henderson thinks he’s got him in.

The next week’s session comes in a haze of vague daydreams and intense session prep. He’s had Steve Henderson on the brain for so long that he all but forgot about his little tête-à-tête with Dustin the week before. Forgot if not for the way that Baby Henderson is vibrating at the Hellfire lunch table when Eddie arrives.

“Steve is coming to get us from Hellfire today!” Eddie personally thinks this doesn’t quite deserve the level of reaction that it’s getting, but Henderson is so worked up no one even needs to prompt him to keep him going. “He had to leave right after his weekend trip to go deal with lawyers and shit.”

“Are they still..?” Lucas trails off, he’s clearly concerned but for all that Eddie hates that the kid is looking down the barrel of jock life he is extremely emotionally adept.

“Mom and Steve both said it was handled now. They won’t answer me when I ask any questions.”

Ominous, everything about Steve Henderson was so fucking weird. A kid who didn’t exist all through high school, that he’s never seen in town, who has lawyers now?

“Maybe Hop could,” the kid started to ask, hopeful.

“Mom says that it’s Steve’s business and we should all stay out of it unless he asks for our help.” Will responds by rote, something he’s clearly already tried before.

“So the infamous Steve Henderson is going to grace us with his presence today?” Eddie knows the answer already, but like most of his vices he can't resist indulging.

"He's taking us all out for ice cream after," Dustin agrees, "you could come too Eddie, I'm sure Steve wouldn't mind!"

"Steve minds everything," Mike grouses.

"Steve always buys your triple scoop sundae."

Eddie thinks Steve Henderson would have elegant fingers. He thinks about how they might toy with the straw of his milkshake while he smiles, coy and teasing, at Eddie, who he's charmed by. This Steve lets Eddie snatch the cherry from his drink, blushes when he gets his stem returned tied in a knot by Eddie's tongue.

"Well if Steve is buying, who am I to refuse an invitation?"

He does not end Hellfire early because Steve Henderson is coming.

He does, by pure coincidence, need to piss 15 minutes before things are set to wrap up. If that gives him enough time to clean himself up a bit that's just luck. This isn't for Steve Henderson.

His bathroom break, and definitely not pre-date primp session, puts him at the back of the pack when Steve Harrington's maroon beemer pulls into the lot. It feels a little bit like sophomore year again. When his hair was in another awkward stage of growing out and curled around his ears, he didn't have his mom to help him with the curls anymore and he didn't know what to do with them now that they seemed to twist and turn in new directions post-buzz. He caught the sweetest looking boy with puppy dog eyes staring and he'd been so embarrassed about getting caught he'd touched his own locks. Hairsprayed into oblivion and locked firmly into place the touch was ripped away and a shy, 'what can you do' smile was shared between the two of them. It feels a bit like junior year when Steve Harrington broke the keg stand record as a sophomore. Rounding the corner from tipsy into drunk or maybe bypassing it altogether for blackout, he wandered over into Eddie's domain. He had that same shy little wave, but a stronger confidence. He sidled up to Eddie and wrapped a curl around a finger. He tugged, just a bit, the way kids do when they want to see if it'll bounce back. "Yknow you'd be pretty if you were a girl." The slip slide of his definitely drunk tone didn't take Eddie out at the knees any less.

The car curves up closer to the front steps and Henderson is shaking like a rocket leaving Canaveral. He actually starts to take a step toward the still moving car when four hands clamp down on him saving Steve last-name-to-be-determined from a vehicular manslaughter charge. Eddie is the last to release him when he hears that car slide into park. The engine has barely had time to rumble to a stop before Steve Harrington is out of it. A toothy smile splits his face and, hidden behind Byers and Wheeler, Eddie watches as Steve Harrington proceeds to engage in the nerdiest fucking handshake he's ever seen. Steve Harrington finishes dying by what seems to be lethal lightsaber disembowelment and waves at the other three teens.

"Alright let's rock n roll if you twerps want ice cream before I drop you off. Joyce will kill me if you're late."

"Steve, can Eddie come with us?"

As Henderson asks Eddie now sees the exact size and shape of the trap he is in. The actually dweeby, dungeon master and drug dealer forced to watch the hot, once cool older brother bow to the obligation of Midwestern courtesy now that he's been ambushed with Eddie's existence. Or worse he'll have to stand there and pretend to be unbothered while King Steve shoots both Hendersons hopes and Eddie's dreams in the face with one curled lip.

He never could have imagined the furrow of confusion between his brows. The way lips wrap themselves around his name, tasting it. He hadn't, in his many fantasies, pictured golden brown eyes though he often thought of them snapping up to him like they were now.

A rosy blush blooms across Steve's face. He has the same shy finger wave he did as a freshman. "Depends, Dust, are you gonna give up your shotgun dibs or are you gonna make your troop leader sit in the back with the rest of the Party.”

He watches as if in slow motion as Henderson lunges for Steve, the elder is laughing as the younger wraps his arms around his neck. There is something very intensely attractive about the lingering jock of it all. How Steve is still upright even as his teenage brother dangles from his neck. “You know it’s Dungeon Master, you get it right with Erica!”

“I have a lot of respect for Erica, the things she does with goblins and kobolds is masterful. You asked me about the lead up to a trap so obvious it felt like an eagle scout showing his little cubbies poison ivy." It's bitchy and nerdy in all the best ways, and then Steve H- Steve looks up at him and winks, "No offense, Munson."

"None taken, Stevie." That seems to catch them both by surprise, the lack of a certain last name to fall back to -- and weeks of imagining what it might be like to interact with the guy who is and isn't right in front of him -- has Eddie overly familiar. "I drove here though." His van stands like a monolith alone in the middle of an empty parking lot.

"Oh."

"But I could meet you there? Are you going to the Dairy Queen by the library or the haunted one?"

"It's not actually haunted," Byers pipes in with frightening sincerity.

"But yeah, the haunted one," Steve says with a boy next door grin.

"Then I will meet you and your charges there Sir Henderson." He bows and only immediately regrets it, now that the once Harrington lord of the school is out of his line of sight. His brain feels like it could short out, faulty wires sparking against memories and daydreams and general hormones.

A sheepie he saved from the slaughter snorts, another - probably Mike - whispers "Gross." There's a grunt that Eddie hopes is the traitor catching an elbow from one of the others.

But it doesn't. fucking. matter because Steve Whatever laughs, practically giggles at Eddie and his antics.

And Dustin's rocket has come in for a rough landing, "I'm going to regret this, aren't I?"

Steve's hand envelopes the top of Dustin's head, he nearly palms it. It's not quite a noogie, more like he shakes his head for him. "Dusty-bun, why would you regret introducing me to your Dork Mother?"

"I'm gonna tell Ma you're being a bitch again."

"She won't believe you, I'm her favorite." He shoots another wink toward Eddie, a joke he's being allowed in on.

Level headed Dustin Henderson, who explained to him, in depth, how getting overly emotional impairs higher level critical thinking, stomps his foot. "You're so full of shit."

"I am. She chose me, she got stuck with you."

"Steve!"

He laughs at the despair he's caused, ruffling cap covered hair again until Dustin stomps out of reaching distance to climb in the Beemer with the other boys. Brown eyes are bright with mischief when he looks to Eddie, and he's struck by a thought. He was right, he hadn't ever met Steve Henderson before today. This is not the same boy who sat in the cafeteria with a closed mouth smile listening to Tommy H. and Carol. "Let me walk you to your car?" He asks.

"It's right there, Stevie, and do you really want to leave that band of miscreants alone with your car?" He's playing with fire, but the fear of getting burned has never stopped him before. He leans in close, whispers, "They might steal it."

Steve pales, a haunted look in his eye. He shakes it off, squeezing his eyes shut tight, and that soft smile slips across his face again. "Let me watch you leave then." That smile slides into a smirk, as he looks Eddie up and down.

He was right about getting burned, his face feels like it's on fire as he flees the scene. His tail is definitely not tucked between his legs because Steve is absolutely staring at his ass right now. He doesn't remember how walking is supposed to feel, but it's probably not like this. It would be embarrassing, the fact that he probably looks like a baby deer discovering he has knees for the first time, if it weren't more important that he makes sure each foot is planted so he doesn't acquaint himself with the ground below him. Safely encased in the van, he chances a look through the windshield and confirms that Steve is watching him.

He waves, and yeah it is gratifying to see the guy who at one point had half the girls in school fawning over him duck his head like he's embarrassed at getting caught staring. Sinclair leans up from the back seat, Eddie watches him clap Steve on the shoulder and make a comment on… something, probably him. It makes the rest of the car laugh and Steve thunk his head down on the steering wheel. The horn sounds, an echoing burst of noise that cuts off just as quickly as it starts when Steve jumps in his seat. The seat belt stops his jump short, and he sends another flustered wave Eddie's way when he notices him still watching.

Maybe he'll mention this to Little Red, his new neighbor has mentioned stealing young Henderson's brother and making him a Mayfield instead. A joke that makes a little more sense now. Sinclair has been making moon eyes at her and baby Hopper at lunch for the last week. That will be a better punishment than anything Eddie could do to him at the table.

He waves back at Steve, gives him his most winning smile -- the one he practiced in the mirror for charming pretty boys if he ever got out of the armpit of Indiana. Mimes driving like he's in a bad movie. Across twenty feet and two windows, he can't hear Steve laugh, needs to get to somewhere where he can. He can see the smile though, the dorky thumbs up.

He lets the Beemer pull out in front of him, watches it for just a moment as reality sets in. Reality. He's going to meet Steve Henderson for soft serve. It's a dream come true.

Arwen shifts into gear, and he slides out behind Steve and the sheepies. A whole new world of daydreaming unlocked.

Maybe next week Steve Henderson will let Nancy pick the kids up next week. He'll slip in the back doors of the school, unnoticed by everyone. Stealth bonus obscene for a fighter class. Eddie is moving slow as he moves minis and graph paper maps into the tackle box Wayne gave him, back to the door he misses his rogue slip through the door until he's already grappled.

"Was it a good game, Munson? You win?"

"It's not like one of your sports, Henderson, the wins aren't as clear cut."

Hands start to wander, "Isn't any time you pull one over on the Party kind of a victory?"

"In which case I do stand victorious, your sweet baby brother lost his brand new axe to a mimic."

"Hmm, you know what we used to do after a victory in my 'sports?'"

A hand has migrated to an especially interesting place. "What?"

"We'd hit the showers."

Eddie shakes himself out of the daydream, easing just the smallest bit harder onto the accelerator. He needs something to cool himself off with. He also really wants to see Steve again, to make up for lost time.

#steddie #steddie fic #steve harrington #steve henderson #eddie munson #ruelogy #inspired by another amazing tumblr ficlet #it put worms in my brain and then this happened

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garycxjk · 3 months

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Why most people don't get Europapa

youtube

So, Joost Klein's Europapa apparently is taking the world by storm. With its happy hardcore or gabber house tunes and beats and the silly music video, there's no denying that this song has a certain charm, though it also has its detractors.

The thing is, though, most people on both sides don't fully get the song.

To summarize the song, it's essentially about an orphan who travels around Europe to find himself. Those were in Joost's own words.

Europapa is about an orphan who travels throughout Europe (and beyond) to find himself and tell his story. At first, people don’t recognise him, but he goes on seizing any opportunity he gets to let himself be seen. Europapa is a tribute to my father. When bringing me up, he passed on to me an expansive view of the world.

Okay, but why does the song sound so silly? Well, that's something deliberate. I don't really know much about Joost Klein's music, but what I do know is that this is basically what most of his songs are. Silly, yet deep.

Okay, brief detour to give context to the rest of what I'm writing, but it's important to remember that Joost Klein basically became an orphan at a young age. He lost his father to cancer when he was 12, and a year later, his mother died as well. This essentially shaped his music. From what I can gather from the many YouTube comments, he always watched Eurovision with his parents, and told them that one day he'd be there on stage.

So, let's just talk about the elephant in the room. Some people call this European propaganda. However, just the first few lines clue you in that it isn't just some pro-EU propaganda.

Welcome to Europe Stay here until I die

In fact, there are several lines used that wouldn't sit right if it were pro-EU propaganda. Let's look at the second verse.

Ich bin in Deutschland Aber ich bin so allein

Which roughly translates to

I'm in Germany But I'm so lonely

The next lines, "Io sono in Italia / Maar toch doet het pijn" (first line Italian, second line Dutch), which translates to "I'm in Italy / But I still feel pain".

Essentially, the entire song is him trying to let go of his past, to let go of his grief. That's essentially what the burning house and the windmill represent at the end, finally moving on from the past.

And that's essentially what the entire song is about. The entire song sounds like it's stuck in the '90s and early noughties. Naturally the most glaring part is the music style. Back in the '90s, happy hardcore and gabber house was really big, especially in the Netherlands. The way people dance back then and dressed when they did can be seen in the scene with Paul Elstak. Then there's the Gameboy Advance, which came out in the early 2000s.

Another cool thing is a reference to New Kids, a Dutch comedy show from 2007, when someone says "Welkom in Europa jongen!" ("Welcome in Europe boy!"). On the television screen, you can see Gerrie van Boven, played by Tim Haars, a character from New Kids.

But it isn't just a throwback. It's all being done deliberate. Something that gets lost in translation is the text. The rhymes work, however, to a Dutch person, it sounds a bit... childish. Very simple, at the very least. But I think that even that is done deliberately. It sounds like a child has been writing these lines, but I think that's the point of the song. It's supposed to sound like a child has been writing these lines.

The entire song is about the protagonist being stuck in the past, being stuck in his grief. It's why there's a disconnect between the text and the melody. Sure, it's a celebration of Europe, of Eurovision. Joost Klein genuinely loves Eurovision. However, it's also essentially him saying, this is me closing another chapter in my life.

Let's take a look at the outro of the song.

Op kruistocht in m'n spijkerbroek, lopend door de velden M'n papa en m'n mama zijn voor altijd mijn helden Aan het einde van de dag zijn we allemaal mensen M'n vader zei me ooit: "Het is een wereld zonder grenzen" Regen op het raam en ik stond huilend bij het venster Veel te vroeg duister, het is winter in de lente "Ik mis je elke dag", is wat ik stiekempjes fluister Zie je nou wel, pa? Ik heb naar je geluisterd

This... seems quite long, doesn't it? Well, that's because that's the full outro. What most hear during the video clip is this:

Aan het einde van de dag zijn we allemaal mensen M'n vader zei me ooit: "Het is een wereld zonder grenzen" "Ik mis je elke dag", is wat ik stiekempjes fluister Zie je nou wel, pa? Ik heb naar je geluisterd

Let's translate the full lyrics. I'll put the translations of the lyrics in the music video in bold and italic.

On my crusade in jeans, walking through the fields My dad and mom are forever my heroes At the end of the day we are all human beings My father once told me: "It's a world without borders" Rain on the window and I stood at the window crying Darkness far too soon, it's Winter in Spring "I miss you every day", is what I secretly whisper You see dad, I listened to you

So, basically, the gist is, this song has many layers. It's a heartfelt tribute to Eurovision, while also telling a personal story about grief and letting go of said grief.

Though I think this interview with Joost Klein on De Avondshow met Arjen Lubach may say more than I could.

youtube

Well, sometimes you must say goodbye to whatever is most dear to you. And when one door closes thousands of others open, apparently. But what I've learned is that you tend to hold on to your own pain sometimes. So this letter provides some sort of closure, dare I say. Saying: "Hey, Mum and Dad... You will always be there for me, but I can't carry this pain forever."

#europapa #joost klein #eurovision #eurovision 2024 #esc 2024 #eurovison song contest #the netherlands #Youtube

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sylwritesstuff · 10 months

Text

Aziraphale and Crowley don't communicate and it stems from their first meeting.

Let me explain.

Before the Beginning, Crowley is at his most honest and his most vulnerable. He tells Aziraphale so excitedly all about stars and how long it's hoping to take for them to form.

Aziraphale is also bluntly honest (a trait he never really loses but does learn to temper) in telling him about the 6K year timeframe.

Crowley then mentions creating a suggestion box and Aziraphale frets over him, concerned already, and we all know how much trouble Crowley got in for asking a few questions.

This sets the tone for everything after.

Crowley stops being honest - "I'm a demon. I lied." - which also means Crowley has been disparaging his own demonhood at least since Aziraphale looked at him askance on a wall and said, "You're a demon. That's what you do."

Aziraphale stops trusting him, but he never stops being polite. Crowley doesn't attack him, so he doesn't attack either. Not at the Ark, and not with Job's goats. Aziraphale is still vaguely seeing the angel he saw in the stars.

Crowley even gives him the permit so he can doublecheck that everything's above board, so to speak. Then we've got Crowley lying straight to Aziraphale's face about killing Job's children because Crowley still sees the angel in the stars who told him the world and his nebulae were going to prematurely end.

The angel who let kids die in the Flood.

Yes, the angel who shielded him on the wall and gave away a flaming sword, so there's some comfort that he won't instantly get smote - "smitten" 😇 - but still the angel who staunchly toes the party line.

After all's said and done and Aziraphale cries about being fallen - cries over being just what Crowley is, even after seeing Crowley circumvent Hell's rules - Crowley tells him he won't tell anyone.

Crowley is good at not telling anyone things, but so is Aziraphale.

Season 1, we get this. Crowley doesn't tell Aziraphale about the hellhound until the last minute. Aziraphale doesn't tell Crowley about finding Agnes's book. Aziraphale doesn't tell Crowley he's meeting with Nazis, and Crowley certainly never tells Aziraphale how he knows them.

Season 2, we get more.

Things Aziraphale doesn't tell Crowley:

• Deringer in a carved out book and gun license

• Drivers license he's had for 90 years - as long as Crowley's had the Bentley

• Why his French is so bad (not until he's asked a direct question)

• He knows Crowley likes to rescue him

Things Crowley doesn't tell Aziraphale:

• Beelzebub dragged him to Hell and made him an offer

• He'd never shot a gun before

I'm sure there are more things I'm forgetting, but those are some of the big ones.

More evidence of their continued lack of communication after the Apocanot is the apology dance. (Although I love it and do need to see Aziraphale do it too.)

Crowley is not wrong, and Aziraphale is not right. They are both both. But that never gets discussed, which is why Crowley never has to talk about being brought to Hell. He never talks about Aziraphale being threatened by Extreme Sanctions.

Aziraphale doesn't know why Crowley comes back, but he very likely assumes it's because Crowley wants to do the right thing after all. Aziraphale is still thinking about the angel Crowley was (season 1, "You were an angel once") and sees every single instance of good as PROOF that Crowley could/should/wants to be an angel again.

Additionally, some of the things they do say don't get heard. Aziraphale likes to tell someone he's doing good now that he's no longer reporting to Heaven. Crowley teases him for it twice, back to back. Tone of voice and "doing good again, angel?" after Maggie says something about the rent.

Aziraphale craves being told he's doing the right thing. Aziraphale has been pushed into a place where he won't get that from the place he always has because Heaven is out of reach. If he'd communicated this to Crowley, who is doing everything he can as always to keep him safe, that Crowley would keep teasing him? That Crowley wouldn't gesture to someone in need and say, "Right. Have fun, angel." Anthony J'acts-of-service Crowley would absolutely let Aziraphale have all the bouncy fun miracles in the world without shame.

Also, when they discuss how to make Nina and Maggie fall in love. Crowley's idea - canopy, rainstorm, vavoom - is absolutely informed by his own experiences, but he doesn't leave it at that. He says he "saw in a Richard Curtis film." He won't let that uncomfortable truth live in reality, pushing it off to humans and film. The realm of fiction, as Aziraphale immediately latches onto.

They don't talk about themselves. They don't talk about being an US. They said their side without getting into the nitty gritty of what that means to the point where neither knows where the line is.

Aziraphale says our car and when Crowley refuses because my car, Aziraphale also says they both get use out of the bookshop. Our car, our bookshop. It's a melding that Aziraphale assumes is perfectly natural, but Crowley hasn't seen it that way. They haven't talked about it.

And when they finally do, Aziraphale is running on the assumption that because Crowley does good and was happiest as an angel, looking over a colourful nebulae - so happy with it, he didn't want to lose it and ended up Falling for it - of course Crowley would want to go back. Of course Crowley would want to be in charge (second in command) since it means doing what they do on a larger scale.

Crowley, however, is still keen to keep going as they have been. Alcoholic breakfast at the Ritz, fixing up the bookshop like nothing happened, getting Muriel away so it can just be the two of them. Crowley is ready for the status quo. Although he does have new knowledge that the car and the bookshop are theirs, he and Aziraphale still carried the plants back to the Bentley.

They are still not talking.

And when they do, it's too little and it's too late. And they never ask each other why.

Next season, they need to learn how to ask why. And I have faith they will.

#good omens season 2 spoilers #GOS2 #Good Omens spoilers #Good Omens 2 #Good Omens #Ineffable Partners #Communication is key #Meta #Good Omens meta

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kitorin · 4 months

Text

LOVE ALL PLAY. - ITOSHI RIN

THREE - TWO IDIOTS, A GENIUS, AND THEIR COMPANION.

contents. no warnings, smau

"I already want to go home." Rin mutters under his breath, thigh bouncing under the table as he stares at the first problem.

The combination of letters and numbers are quite grotesque, and the instructions are asking for far too much (how is he supposed to figure about what it was? It's unknown for a reason). Rin scrunches his nose in disgust at the sight, so does Isagi, who runs his hand through his hair while staring at his notebook. Shidou on the other hand was perfectly unbothered (as expected) as he displays discourtesy in the library's private room, resting his feet and legs onto the table (Rin thanks himself for sitting away from him).

"I need help." At least Isagi was willing to reveal his confusion, Rin reminds himself to listen in carefully to the explanation. It's not that math is too hard, but that he hasn't seen anything like this before.

"Save it 'til the end. I'm working on somethin' for a bit." He doesn't look away from his phone, and from the way he picked his nose and watched with half lidded eyes, he obviously wasn't concentrating on anything. "Wait for the others."

"Who? I thought it was just us." Rin diverts his attention away from the question, the mere sight of mathematics was enough to make him nauseous.

"'Was'." Shidou still doesn't look up from the screen. "Isagi over here found people willing to help your dumbass." Rin opens his mouth to defend himself, but Shidou continues before he could do so. "They should be here anytime soon, oh, they just texted. Finding us right now."

The senior's lack of attention and care only frustrated Rin further, he's not quite sure if he hates the word problems or Shidou more.

"Who did you invite?" He wants to trust Isagi enough to find someone reliable, but that was difficult after Yukimiya grouped him with Shidou.

Isagi remains silent, as he rushes over to the door to open it when he hears a knock. "Hiori! Thank you for your time today." He greets him enthusiastically, bowing at an almost 90 degree angle, mannerisms flustering the taller boy.

"There's no need to be so formal—We're happy to help and it'll be good revision for us, especially since it's earlier than we usually study." He ushers Isagi to stand up straight, reminding him that formalities were unnecessary since they were the same age. "You must be Shidou?"

Finally, Shidou puts his phone away. "Yeah, thanks for helpin' us out with this idiot."

Rin interjects. "There's two of us."

"No, there's one of you, and there's Yoi. Yoi's cute. You are not." Shidou doesn't even spare a glance in Rin's direction. "Your brother on the other hand—that man is adorable."

Rin scowls. "Don't even call him that."

"Fine, he's my cutie patootie."

"The fuck does that mean?"

Shidou crosses his arms in attempt to mock Rin. "He's my pookie bear."

"Worst one by far."

As Rin finds himself more disgusted by Shidou's peculiar infatuation with his older brother, Isagi and Hiori didn't pay much attention to their conversation.

"y/n's here." Hiori points at somewhere out the door, down the corridor and Isagi peers outside to check. "They were at the bathroom."

"And why is that fucker here?" Rin regrets speaking, his harsh tone making Hiori flinch. He had no problem with Hiori, but he can't help how the thought of you makes his skin itch with agitation.

Panicking, Isagi inserts himself in the space between Rin and Hiori. "I invited them—They're both really smart and willing to help."

"Rin Rin!" To which, Rin groans. "I had no idea you could read a book, let alone study."

He scowls. "Very funny. As if you haven't heard me answer our teacher."

You shrug, actions and words dripped with sarcasm. "I dunno, if you really were capable you wouldn't be here relyin' on us."

Rin remains silent at that.

"I already like them." Their senior cackles. "Shidou Ryusei, by the way." Hiori briefly introduces himself, and so does he.

Isagi leans over to whisper into Rin's ear. "Feel free to complain and object, if you're willing to pay for a tutor, or okay with not competing." Rin's reply is non existent, and the silence already feels awkward.

"Anyways, though I can't and won't guarantee any results I'll do my best." You announce as Hiori nods along. "Let's all do our best, yeah?"

Isagi grins, full of energy and determination, returning to his worksheet. While Rin was quite the opposite. You and Hiori unpack, laying out everything you'd need for the study session.

Only for you to turn on your phone

Hiori pokes your cheek. "y/n. Do I need to remind you that now's not play games? We're here to study, remember?"

The oldest in the room interferes. "Who cares, one round. I play too." He mimics your action. "I'll make the room."

"See? Shidou-senpai gets me. Surely one round. All together. I can actually play properly since my hands aren't soaked with sweat."

Hiori winces at the unnecessary detail.

Rin interrupts. "You're just going to play games while we study?"

"Oh I'm sorry, when was the last time you got passed a test. Primary? Kindergarten? Pre-school?"

With a scoff, he retaliates. "And when was the last time you grew? Infancy?"

To the best of your ability, you conceal your offense. "I'll have you know I grew an inch in the past year."

"And I'll have you know that I ace English every year." At least foreign languages had practical use for everyone. He doesn't need to fully comprehend and analyse Shonagon Sei's The Pillow Book or be proficient in mathematics to dominate as an athlete. Arguably, fluency in another language was most important.

"Only English?" You critique him in another language; what he'd assume to be Mandarin. "Only two languages?"

Great, now you have another thing to make fun of him for. Maybe he'll finally start learning French.

Hiori hits your shoulder and you yelp (he also snatches your phone while he's at it). "You can't be talking—you only know a few sentences of Mandarin and didn't get any of the tones right just then." Rin holds back a groan for falling for your antics, while resisting a smile from Hiori calling it out.

"I would've sold it if you didn't point that out."

"You're a scammer, not a salesman. Quit being immature and stop trying to compete with the poor guy." Hiori mutters out an apology on your behalf, as he drags you by the hem of your shirt to where Isagi was scratching his head over a problem. "I'm separating you two."

Rin likes Hiori, quite a bit.

Shidou nudges Isagi. "I like this y/n." Well I don't, Rin thinks to himself. "Here's the plan. We'll teach the subjects we're best at. I think you 'nd Hiori are fine with everything though. Straight As, right?" Rin doesn't care about grades, but knowing that you're maintaining a results as an athlete and proficient in academics has his skin prickling with envy.

"Yeah." You reply nonchalantly, peering at the problem Isagi was stuck on. "Not that confident with science though."

Hiori nods. "As long as it's not math, but y/n can cover for that anyways. I started learning English from a young age so I guess that's my best topic."

Shidou claps his hands together. "Perfect."

"You're actually so fucking stupid."

"I'm sorry I haven't been studying for every day of my life." Rin spat, clenching the mechanical pencil in his hand hard enough to the point he started trembling. "You're here to teach me not to act like a fucking dumbass.

"It's long division." You yell. "It's literally the same as regular long division but with 'x' involved."

"Well I can't do the one with polynomials if I can't do regular long division." It completely slipped his mind once he discovered that high school tests often permitted the use of a calculator.

The poor table suffers an indignant slam from you. "How? I've done this stuff since I could hold a pencil."

"Not everyone's the same as you." Rin wonders, what sort of childhood you had to already comprehend such concepts at a young age (not that he cares, it's simply curiosity). "You don't even need to know how to do long division, you have a calculator."

"Well some shit you just don't forget.'

"You're clearly wrong in that case."

"No you're just stupid."

Amidst the chaos within the tiny room, Rin can barely catch the gentle encouragement from Hiori to Isagi. Why can't you be like that, or at least, why can't Hiori help him instead? Shidou fucked off somewhere a while ago, Rin's relieved that he doesn't have to spend time with him; but that means more time with you.

He leans back into his chair, tossing the pencil onto the table. "Why can't you be like that?" He aggressively points in Hiori's direction. "Mature and intelligent."

Though hesitant, Hiori denies his compliments. "y/n's a lot smarter than me... especially in mathematics."

"Smarter or not, doesn't matter. I hate them."

Now you're slumping onto the table, nuzzling your face into your own bicep. "Love you too, sweetheart."

"Do not call me that—"

You cut him off by slamming your palm on the table. "Food. I want food. A break is well deserved, don't you think?"

Something tells him that it was directed to him, but Rin still responds. "I'm the one who needs a break. All you did was yell and it produced no results."

Your faux pout makes a return, as you make your way to Isagi, hands resting on his shoulders. "Think of everyone else dumbass. We've been locked in a room for hours—"

"You're free to walk out whenever, in fact, please do so. Now."

"You people need my genius—"

"The booking." Hiori interrupts. "The booking is finishing soon. So we're leaving soon either way." Relief makes Isagi pack everything up, stuffing it hastily in his shoulder bag. "And you willingly came here to study, stop hyperbolising everything."

"Hi-o-rin, we're getting food." Ignoring his scolding, you cling onto his arm, carrying the both of your bags while you're at it. "There's a nice place nearby, let's all go together." You sling your arm around Isagi's shoulder, pulling him in. “Surely we go get zaru soba too.”

Isagi falls for your charm—or what Rin would much rather call irritation. “That’d be nice. Where would you recommend, then?”

“y/n and I usually go to this place nearby. It’s a bit of a walk but it’d be worth it. They have other foods too if you’re more of a rice person.” Hiori had positioned himself between you and Rin, after weaving out of your embrace. “We can get ice cream from FamilyMart if we overheat.” He holds the door open for everyone, to which Rin bows politely in gratitude.

“I can’t.” Rin declines, partially because he prefers the quiet atmosphere of his home to eat; the rest of his reasoning is merely your presence.

What part of “I can’t” did you not understand.

Now he’s seated at a table in a crowded and noisy restaurant, thanks to you dragging him along (he's also confused at how you managed to pull that off). He’d be thankful that he wasn’t seated next to you, but that meant being forced to face you for the entirety of his meal.

There’s you in front of him (by Hiori’s side, of course), pondering a stupid decision while Hiori actually bothers to hear you out.

“Grape Calpis… or regular Calpis.”

“Can you even tell the difference between them?” Hiori’s fingers massage his temples. “Hurry up and give Rin the menu.”

“Yeah yeah, I know. You’re not my mum.”

Isagi interjects. “Which one did you pick?”

You hand the menu to Rin. “Milk tea.”

And with that Isagi returns to glancing over the menu.

“Ochazuke for me. Cold.”

“I’ll get the katsudon.” Isagi asks.

You stand up with a gentle slam of the table (what is it with you and that tendency?). “I’ll go order then. Hiorin, same as usual?” Your being to weave through people after Hiori nods.

“What’s wrong? Thinkin’ about somethin’?”

Isagi chokes on nothing. “No, I mean yes but it’s about y/n—”

Maintaining eye contact, Hiori takes a sip of his water. It doesn’t come off as intimidating, rather curious instead. “Have they been annoying you too?”

“Of course not—that’s just Rin being Rin.” Arms folded against his chest, Rin glares from the corner of his eye, but doesn’t say anything. “I hear a lot of people calling y/n a genius. Why is that?"

“Oh. That. Our club gave them that nickname because one, they're really good at school, and two, they were disgustingly good without knowing anything about fundamentals. And it didn't take long for them to learn it either, they were really awkward when first playing too." Hiori gazes off in the distance, grappling for the right words. "They're just naturally good at a lot of things too."

In other words, you’re one of those freakish beginners with a freakish start and freakish development.

Smart and athletic, you truly embody perfection, if character was ignored. Perhaps you made a deal with god, your sanity and maturity in exchange for skills others spend years refining.

“Good at school and sports. Must be nice.” Isagi sighs. “I still don't understand logarithms...what's your secret?”

Hiori shrugs. “Study. You get it after doing it a lot. Just ask y/n.”

A groan comes from the shorter boy. “Forget it, genius’ don’t have secrets. I’ll practice.”

Rin scoffs. “And how long are you going to stand there, dumbass?”

Hiori whips around to see you grinning. “Go on go on, keep praising me please.” You take your seat again. “Don’t worry Yoichi, just send me anything you need help with.”

Isagi nods, hesistant but determined.

“You’re going to be fine. If I can do it so can you.” You open your bottle of royal milk tea after distributing the other drinks.

“Thanks but we’re not the same…”

You yawn, eyes watering slightly. “I too have failed tests before. They’re recoverable.”

Rin’s heard stuff like this before. “Like what? A 99 instead of an 100?”

“30 instead of a pass.” Hiori covers his mouth to stifle a laugh, even going as far as turning away (it only made Rin feel more embarassed). “I knew I was screwed so I wrote an apology on my test paper. And that is why, you people should trust me when I say you’re going to do great. Eat well. Sleep well. Practice consistently.”

Check, check, almost check. It can’t be too different from learning English.

Hiori slaps you on the back, loudly. “Quit yapping when we both know you already only do the first.”

“And you’re no better—” The volume of your speech is quickly turned down by the waitstaff’s presense. “Thank you for the food.” Effortlessly you switch from your annoying self to a polite customer.

“Rin, Yoichi, don’t think about exams too hard. We don’t even know the dates yet so you’ll catch up fine.”

Rin trusts Hiori’s rationality—and yours too (he’ll never admit it out loud), as his picks up his drink and brings it to the centre of the table midair, against everyone else’s.

“Excuse me—?” Hiori calls over a staff member. “Can we split the bill please?”

She smiles. “It’s already been taken care of.”

“We paid already?” Isagi’s perplexity was evident. “I don’t remember doing that.”

“And you’re remembering right, dumbass.” Rin was confused as well, but Hiori seemed to understand the situation perfectly. The moment the waitress left he almost pounced on you.

You were unfazed by the attack; effortlessly dodging it and grabbing your bag while doing so. “My treat! Thank you and well done for your hard work today.” Out the restaurant you go, followed by a mad Hiori, attracting a few concerned glances.

“Oi—come back you fucking idiot. Let me pay equally dumbass.”

“Wait for us—” Isagi scurries out of the diner booth, ushering Rin out to chase after them. “Hiori—!”

With a tired sigh, Rin follows.

Rin pockets his phone, staring out the train's window instead. You're seated in the seat in front of him again, a similar configuration from lunch, but with Hiori by his side instead of Isagi.

You peer at Isagi's screen. "Your team group chat actually looks fun. Can I join it?"

"It's called a team group chat, of course not." Hiori objects on Isagi's behalf. "We have our own, anyways."

"You either leave me on read and Nijiro only responds with emojis. At least Kurona's fun and sends shark pics." Rin begs Isagi to not surrender to your pleas, the majority of that group chat was already irksome enough.

"Maybe stop spamming it with your reactions to a show that's clearly too scary for you to watch at 1 am."

You retort playfully. "It's not spam if it's beautiful, intricate media analysis."

"What part of screaming about shirtless Ahn Hyo Seop says intricate, or analytical?" With the way Hiori snapped, the gentle boy in the library room was nowhere to be seen. You must have a talent for ruining others' composure.

"Appreciation, of art?"

You continue bickering with Hiori, Isagi as a poor viewer. Rin watches too, in a much calmer way while Isagi awkwardly observes your squabble (and thanking the train for being so empty).

Only when you get up to shake Hiori by the shoulders (a stupid resort in a stupid debate about actors and actresses), Rin bends over to reach for your bag, hand reaching for the zip, an ephemeral disappearance into your bag.

When you have enough of quarreling with Hiori, it was as if nothing happened, you plop back into your seat, not noticing a thing; Rin leans into the backrest, going back to gazing out the window.

TWO | MASTERLIST | FOUR

pairing. itoshi rin x reader

synopsis. all itoshi rin ever wanted was a peaceful high school career, his plans go to ruin thanks to the school's badminton genius; entangling their lives—and emotions together.

contents. rivals to lovers, badminton player!reader, sports romance, fluff, high school au

a/n. hardest part is always the fucking title i swear to god

taglist. @yuzurins, @silly-ez, @chigirizzz, @kaiserkisser, @httpshujii, @saesins, @yoimyas, @saetorinrin, @hxniplayz, @certaindreampost, @rroxii, @jar-03, @celestair, @satoruskitchenrag, @kaitfae, @biaonww, @hellothere9597, @its-ur-pillow, @saesofficialwife, @miyanaranagikenmal-intp, @popponn, @kascar-chronicle—bold means i cannot tag you

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m1ssunderstanding · 3 months

Text

Understanding Lennon McCartney Rewatch Part 3.2

The thing is Paul just physically can't say what he feels. It's just an impossibility for him. So if he says reading a negative article about himself “doesn't help” or “it's not good” but it “doesn't get home” I just assume he means ‘It hurts, but I can't think about that too hard or I'll go into a self-hate suicidal spiral again’.

I always love how Paul says Linda. “Linder is er, nature mad.”

She!!

Hearing Paul talk about watching Mary be born makes me wonder if John was there with Sean? Also I wonder if Linda would talk about the experience so glowingly. Probably. She's tough as nails. I had a lovely experience, personally, after the epidural lol

“Dear friend . . . I'm in love with a friend of mine.” This is such a strange and beautiful song. It's a man who has to apologize to his friend for falling in love with someone else. At least, that's my interpretation. What's everyone else's?

I understand why he's so closed off. I do. But when John is going off every five seconds, we're missing half the picture here and it's turning out warped. They really are such a good study of attachment honestly.

“Nothing will ever break the love we have for each other.” White-knuckling my way through this section with this quote clenched in my fist.

Yoko, talking about John fighting with Paul: any couple will go from swearing to kissing and it's like that. What favors are you doing yourself here, babe? Maybe John's the PR mastermind between the two of them.

I find John's comparison of working with his romantic partner to being ambidextrous very confusing. Does he mean just doing two things at once?

“If I can't have a fight with my best friend, I don't know who I can have a fight with.” -- Intro slutty gender-fluid Wings Paul my beloved -- “Tell me why, why, why do you treat me so bad? So bad? When you're the best friend a man ever had?” I heard on some podcast somewhere. Someone was going on about how forward-thinking the Beatles were to refer to the women in their songs as “friends”. And I was like, nununununu do not give them that credit.

This is just soooo. In this era? 90 minutes in the middle of a recording session?

John: Sorry, my estranged fiance is calling, gotta take a break. Guitarist: again? Drummer: how estranged can they be if they call every three minutes? Yoko: should we just record the other parts or . . . John: (receiver cradled to his cheek, lovesick grin on his face) Hey, how was Heather's school program? Haha, yeah, I bet she was.

Okay, so you've made up with Paul and now you're done being homophobic? *Cardi b voice* well that's suspicious.

The fact that John's asking Paul to play on stage with him in 1972?? Ugh! If it was just about legalities and money and shit I would be genuinely so pissed at Paul for not going. If only because Come Together sounds incredibly lame without his bass and piano. But also for the obvious fix-it reasons. I have to remind myself of how truly awful Klein was. By being the only one to stand firm against him, Paul actually ended up saving them all from a lot of trouble. But gosh would this have been good!

Things normal people say, for sure, for sure.

Okay in my head it went like this. John calls George and bitches about what an egomaniac Paul is because he won't do anything with him as long as Klein is involved. George gets off the phone and calls Ringo and they make a bet as to how long it is until John decides they should get rid of Klein.

“Where's your audience, Paul?” “In the theater, Dave.” As he should. The cuntiness is unparalleled. Yeah, maybe people like to see a family friendly eclectic magic pixie sexy hard rock floor show? Ever thought about that, Dave?

Anyway, he seems genuinely pissed when the interviewer even mentions the other Beatles and he refuses to even admit he still talks to any of them. Why?

John's just so benevolent and selfless. He's completely straight, of course, but he's always offering to do gay shit. You know. To be nice.

I forget that not only was May their literal employee, but she was ten years younger on top of that. And yet, she managed to do so much good in that relationship. I have so much respect for her.

There's obviously a lot going on behind the scenes that they don't say in interviews. Duh. But I wonder what it is that caused Paul to be so open and happy in this interview where he's asked about the other Beatles compared to before. I wonder if he and John had a really lovely talk, or if he's heard a demo of “I know, I know.” Or maybe it's just he's so reassured that they've got rid of Klein that he feels safe acting open to a reunion on record. Who knows, Yoko.

So so smart to pair “In My Life” handwritten lyrics with the matching lyrics of “I know I know” playing at the same time. I forget about that connection (“I love you more”) because it's so overshadowed by the “than yesterday” right after. I seriously wonder if John thought he was being so obvious with this one the way he was with HDYS and half hoped people would ask him if it was about Paul and he could make up for the whole thing. Because it's just so heavy-handed. It's beautiful. I love it. I'm sure Paul loved it. But yeah. John's just beating us over the head with the references here.

I also wonder (very tentatively!!!) if Paul was maybe a bit more emotionally vulnerable with John than we usually think. I would never think this except for the “you know I nearly broke down and cried” “I'm sorry that I made you cry” and “no more crying!” I don't know. What do we think?

His little baby smirk. It's so silly and cute. He's being very positive about getting back together, and the interviewer asks if John would initiate that. Just a very coy, “a, well, I couldn't say.” I wonder if at that point if he'd said on live tv that he wanted to get together again if it would've happened. Seems like it might have, but I understand him being scared.

Elton John taking pictures like a fan and John: I wanna impound all those photos till I get me green card. What a random idea for a commercial. I love it, obviously, it's hilarious. I wonder who thought of it.

This doc is so good at implication. The smirk as “loving in the palm of my hand” plays. That's not a reference to hand jobs, is it? Certainly not talking to someone with beautiful hands?

Everyone go look up Nineteen Hundred Eighty Five on YouTube. The singing sex is something else, yeah, but I'm always so blown away by the piano part. The fact that he's self taught and doesn't read music and this man will go on to compose symphonies.

#paul mccartney #the beatles #john lennon #mclennon #linda eastman #yoko ono #understanding lennon mccartney #ulm

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fuckmyskywalker · 4 months

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didn’t see the part where u said uni and i was like WTF ANYAS GOING TO JAIL!?

anyway trailer trash anakin would totally hit you up and knock on your trailer like he usually does and you invite him inside for some snacks. he’s just casually like

yeah i’m gonna be going to jail for smth tmr can we smash?

18+. Smut. Trailer trash!Anakin. Jail sentence. Drug mention. Oral.

Trailer Trash!Anakin is my prostitute, literally.

"Again?" You ask, handing him a can of beer. You don't usually drink— at least not beer, but a friend of yours left his six pack in your fridge, so you might as well offer one to Anakin. He looks like he needs it.

"Yeah, again," He rolls his eyes, cracking open the can and taking a long swing. His Adam's apple wobbles slightly, and you have to clench your teeth to not choke on your beer. "90 days"

This time you do choke, wiping the drink off your chin. "90 days? Why?"

"Controlled substances, but I already have two prior convictions," He confesses, hiding his disgusted grimace behind the can.

"And who is going to take care of your trailer?"

"My daughter,"

"The oldest?"

Anakin sighs, lowering his drink and crossing his arms. "Yeah, she might be a pain in the ass like her mother but— at least she still loves me." That was... debatable. Countless times you've hard Anakin arguing with his oldest during the weekends, when she comes to visit him and do his laundry— since he cannot do it himself. You have thought about offering to help him, but you don't want to commit to it.

"That sucks, I'm sorry," You frown, crossing one leg over the other. You notice how he eyes your legs, he isn't too discreet. Anakin is very friendly around you, always helping you with your grocery bags and to fix that damn light bulb outside your trailer.

"I'll be fine," He shrugs, patting your thigh— which doesn't surprise you. "I'll miss your pretty face."

It doesn't take you long to get on your knees. Stroking his cock slowly as your mouth sucks on his balls. Anakin groans, hanging his head back and reaching for the back of your head, rubbing your face against his heavy ball-sack. His musky, strong scent makes you dizzy, he is... disgustingly manly. Maybe it's the rough exterior and the deep grunts and moans— or maybe is how he belittles you nicely in order to fuck you.

"Fuck yes— just like that," He praises, yanking your hair and guiding his cock inside your mouth, making sure to tap the tip against your cheek and tongue before sliding down your throat. "You should come visit me in jail, baby. I wouldn't mind a conjugal visit."

#𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 anya answers!#skywalkershootme #trailer trash!anakin #trailer trash!anakin skywalker #anakin skywalker #anakin skywalker smut #anakin skywalker x reader #anakin skywalker x you #anakin skywalker x reader smut #anakin smut #anakin x reader #anakin x you

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argreion · 4 months

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Leon Kennedy sleepy + general HCs with your local ranter.

So sorry for clogging the Leon Kennedy x reader tag y'all. I seriously just fuckin' love TALKING! He's been my hyperfixation for months alongside RE Lore. :( I hope I can help you guys create your own little HCs like I took from some fics and the help of my friend! <3 ALSO I WOULD LOVE TO HEAR Y'ALLS HEADCANONS IF YOU HAVE THEM!!! I LOVE RAMBLES/RANTS! 🩵 No warnings, btw! Just silly stupid ass comfy headcanons I have :)

RE2 being all sweet and cuddly. Honestly, I feel like he might fall asleep to Disney movies. Just like some of the Leons to me. Always so strict on a nightly routine, too. Wash your face, brush your teeth, comb your hair etc. Then fallling asleep with a Disney movie on in the background? Heavenly. Perfection. The fact he might wear goofy ass pajamas too? He just SCREAMS trying to live his childhood while he still can young.

RE4 just washes his face and cleans his eyelashes. He feels more practical, yet still tries to take care of himself. Makes sure to take medication, but prefers if you tell him. It makes him feel special. I mean, Leon IS special. He likes comfort and trusting people. Sometimes waking up crying and burrowing into the bed beside you. RC and Spain wasn't fun at all! Your chest, neck, stomach, he loves it ALL. Adores a stomach cuddle, even if you got no stomach! Thighs, too, taking a nap while you watch a show.

ID Leon low-key feels like the small drop-off era. Still washing his face and eyelashes. Medication, if needed, still. You can notice slight changes, and him kinda hating the government in small ways now. The submarine, Jason and Shen Mei, and then getting judged for being pretty. Our pretty little blond, blue-eyed boy! Feel like he might be sick of it. Might be a little peeved at general compliments, but still tries to keep them in good faith. Grows his hair out, and gets a little messy. Just like in the comic, he looks like a soggy wet cat, y'all! Keeps his stubble pretty trimmed too.

Damnation Leon feels like the MAJOR drop. ID was the calm before the storm. Drinking problems start, and man starts getting less sleep. Probably five to four hours MAX. Still loves to cuddle like all the other Leons. You can kind of sense something is off. Washes his face, and that's it. Goes to sleep in his boxers, and kicks you in your sleep. C'mon, old man, stop kicking me in the ass! So rude! (I still love you, you little fucker.) Possible cartoon lover, I feel like once he gets older, he just kinda tries to relax. Man is tired constantly, and the alcohol makes it WORSE. Stubble is more grown out in my head.

RE6 Leon… Honestly 2nd fav. I'm an old man fucker, sorry y'all. Feel like the drinking is kinda toned down compared to Damnation, but spiked really fuckin' high in Vendetta. Silly cartoon watcher, I stand by that shit. I like making Leon be a stupid crusty, soggy cat. Probably really likes the cartoons from the 90s. His 'childhood' moment. Nicer than Damnation, but just more seasoned compared to RE4R and ID. Dad jokes and one-liners coming out at least three times a day. Sleeps about 6–7 hours on normal-ish nights. Tries to at least get 7. Please get on him about his meds or getting his eyes checked. He's crusty, and he needs a back brace possibly, too. Needs you to massage his back after a mission and just be there. Disney movie night with him when? He'll debate about the best Disney movie. His fav movie is up to you.

Vendetta… Oh, fuck. Man dropped off the wagon in multiple ways. He doesn't wash his face, and he probably does have a few tooth problems. Got a tooth gap for getting his ass beat, and is kinda self-conscious about it. Stubble is unshaven, and hair needs to be cut. He doesn't give a crap anymore, but the nightmares he has certainly give a crap about him. Making him think about quitting, if he could. We all know the poor man is gonna be strangled to death because of the government. Eye bags, pains in his body, and waking up with a horrible hangover. He doesn't really have a nightly routine, except pass out from drinking OR try to fall asleep normally. With a lover, I feel like he still wouldn't care. Movie buff AND nerd for mechanical shit. Rants about it, listen if he does it. It makes him fall in love with you slightly faster if you want to go that route. Also, TUMMMMMYYYY!!

DI LEONNNN! MY FAV! My little old ass kitten! Moves back to an ID state in a way. Instead, kinda hates the government still for his circumstances. Back to the cartoon AND falling asleep to Disney movies. Tries to remember his stuff more often now. He's still a little iffy, but he's got the spirit! Honestly, he might get LASIK. More of just wearing sweatpants and boxers kind of guy to bed. Got a little patch of chest hair too. Cuddly tummy and thighs. Likes hugging you from behind AND getting hugged from behind. Sleepy cuddles make his day better, and possibly more. Lastly, man sleeps like a rock now. If he's on top of you? Crushed. Your dead. Donezo.

#leon kennedy x reader #leon kennedy

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sports-on-sundays · 2 months

Note

hii <3 i have a request for an hector fort one shot. basically he has a crush/is in love with reader but shes few years older than him… she doesnt want to admit her feelings for him because she doesnt date younger boys and thinks it isn’t right. in then end hector makes her realize her feelings or sth like that . thank you if youre going to write this, take Your time anyway <3 have a nice day/evening idk whats Your time zone lol !!

it isn't right / Héctor Fort

Summary: Héctor x adult!female!Barcelona videographer!reader - Description above.

Warnings: blood

Requested?: Yes.

Author's Note: I decided at the end, his birthday passes, just because that felt like it should happen, so that they're both adults. Other than that, thank you.

Héctor kind of refuses to call it a crush.

Because a crush sounds too immature. It sounds like just a little kid crush, that doesn't really matter.

But it does matter, and it's more than just a crush.

Héctor is sure he really does love you.

"Mate, but there's no way," Marc comments, crossing his arms as he walks onto the training pitch with Héctor. "She's, like, so much older than you."

"Not really," Héctor comments in annoyance.

"Do you know how old she is?"

"Yeah!"

"How?"

Héctor glares, embarrassed. "I asked her."

"You did? When? And what did she say?" Marc asks, eyebrows shooting up.

"I don't know... A couple weeks ago. She just told me, and said she just had her birthday."

"Oh. So...? How old is she?"

Héctor glances at his football boots. "Twenty-one."

"Pwoah! Yeah, and you're seventeen!"

"Four years! It's only four years!"

"What year would that be? She was born in 2002? At least she's not from the 90's... Then she'd be really old."

"Yeah, because twenty-five or twenty-six is really old, right?" Héctor comments in disbelief at his teammate.

"Just saying," Marc shrugs. "Either way, you should go for girls your age. You've got no chance with her. She's too pretty, anyway."

"You're saying I'm not good looking?!"

Marc grins. "You're putting words in my mouth!"

"Well, I'll prove you wrong. I'll make her like me. You'll see. I'm going to go talk to her right now."

"Alright. If you say so," Marc comments with an eye roll as he continues walking.

So you look up from your camera to see Héctor approaching you. You smile. You've had a few short conversations with him, and you have to admit, he's sweet. "Hey, Héctor."

He smiles back, blushing a little.

You're not stupid. You've picked up that he's got a little crush on you.

"Hey, Y/n," he says, putting his hand on your shoulder. You glance to it, but pay that no mind as he continues, "How are you?"

"Good, and you?"

"Good... I... can I ask you something?"

You chuckle. "Shoot, Héctor."

"Do you.. Would you say I'm, like, good looking?"

You grin a little. "I think most football players are."

"But, like, me. Specifically...?" he pushes.

You smile. "You're alright." You really do like Héctor. You think he's sweet, and if he were a bit older, he's definitely the type of guy you could see yourself falling for.

But he's just...

He's still so young. You don't even let yourself consider those feelings, because you know that would be wrong. He's not even an adult yet.

"Just alright?" he leans closer.

"Do you want me to tell you you're handsome?"

"I want you to be honest," he grins.

"Why do you think I'm not being honest?" you inquire, turning back to your camera. His hand remains on your shoulder.

"I don't know..."

"Alright, Héctor. You're handsome."

"You're not just saying that?"

"No, I'm not," you respond casually. He remains there awkwardly, just standing there, so you look up at him, meeting his eyes, and say, "Anything else I can do for you?"

"Uh, date me?" he suddenly blurts.

You snort, but feel your face heat a bit. "You're basically twelve. Ew."

"I'm seventeen! And you just turned twenty-one, anyway! You're not that much older."

"So someone is just a little stuck on me," you state.

"So what?" he says in annoyance.

You sigh, your eyes softening. "Listen, Héctor. I like you a lot. You're sweet, and kind. But I simply can't date a seventeen-year-old. That goes against my conscience. It's not right. We can be friends, but that's it."

He grins, but there's still a bit of disappointment in his eyes. "I mean, hey. Friends is better than nothing... right?"

"Right," you smile. "Now, you better get to training. You're not paid to talk to me."

He rolls his eyes but runs off to do just that.

"Wow, Héctor... This is so nice..." you say softly as you look around the restaurant you sit in. You and Héctor have been hanging out more, going out places, but every single time, you're sure to remind him it's not a date.

"I figured you'd like it here," Héctor says with pride, crossing his arms across his chest.

You're aware of how much he tries to impress you.

And sometimes it works, but you try not to let him know.

As you eat, he slowly inches his hand towards yours, and slips it on top. But you slip it out, saying, "I reckon friends don't typically do that for no reason, huh, Héctor?" You grin teasingly, rolling your eyes.

He laughs, his cheeks reddening a bit. "Whatever."

You continue eating, and talking, just about life. There's a lot of teasing between you two that you're not ready to admit is flirting.

You've trained your mind to only think about Héctor when he's in front of you, because otherwise, you'd find yourself falling for a seventeen-year-old, and you simply will not let that happen.

You and some of Héctor's other friends are on the beach, playing an epic sand volleyball tournament by the lovely expanse of cool light blue water.

Of course, Héctor made sure to be on the same team as you.

Your long hair has grains of sand in it, and your knees are a little red, but you don't care. You're having the time of your life.

When you take off your tank top in the heat so you're just wearing your swim top, you catch Héctor's eye and snap. "Hey, buddy! Keep your focus! It's your serve!"

He blushes and looks away, before serving.

It's quite a bad serve, and goes straight into the grass on the other end of the net.

You catch his eyes and teasingly stick out your tongue as he argues, "We're on the same team!" with a little laugh.

But then, you run for the ball a few volleys later, slide, hit it up, but have a little tumble, gently hit your head on the pole that holds up the volleyball net, and up laying on your back, staring up at the blue sky, eyes glazed over in confusion.

But only for a moment, before Hector's concerned eyes come into view. Immediately he's there, kneeling by you. "Are you okay?" he asks, putting his hand on your arm.

"Yeah... yeah, I am. I think so..." You feel a bit of a sting below your hairline on your forehead, so you drag your hand over it, and stare in horror when you bring your hand back down to see it covered in blood.

You scream.

"Hey, hey... Looks just like a gash," Héctor says immediately in a soothing tone, giving your arm a little rub. "Come on." He hold his hand out to you to help you up. "I'll help you clean it up in the bathroom."

"Should we keep playing without you guys?" one of Héctor's friends calls as you walk with him toward the bathroom slowly, kind of in a daze.

"Yeah!" Héctor calls back. "We'll be back in a few."

When in the bathroom, you immediately rinse your hand as Héctor begins gently wiping up your forehead, asking gently, "Does it hurt a lot...?"

"No..." you say softly, looking at yourself in the mirror. "Just a little sting... It was just the blood, I think..."

He nods. "The shock of seeing all that blood."

"Right. Exactly," you say with a shaky sigh.

"Just looks like a cut that's bleeding a lot. You'll be a okay," he reassures, and although you could have just told yourself that, it's nice to have someone else saying it. "Just need it to stop bleeding as much, and then we can go back, and I'll get you a Band-Aid for it."

"You thought to bring Band-Aids?" you ask, surprised.

"I somehow remembered, yeah," he chuckles. But then his cheeks redden as he adds, "I mean, it's good I did, in the end. That way, I can take care of you..." His hand gently strokes your arm.

"Shut up, Héctor," you respond, looking away from him in the mirror to shield him from seeing the stupid pinkness on your cheeks. "You realize I could have taken care of myself just fine. I don't need a seventeen-year-old taking care of me."

"Sure," he grins, "but one did, regardless."

You sigh and roll your eyes as he continues to dab at your cut. Once the bleeding has stopped enough to not be dripping blood, he takes your hand and leads you out of the bathroom, saying, "I'll seal this up with a Band-Aid now."

You almost forget to slip your hand back out of his.

When you reach the beach chairs, where the Band-Aids Héctor brought will be, he gently urges you to sit down. You do so, and he kneels in front of you, looking into your eyes. He brushes some hair off your forehead gently, away from the wound, before putting the Band-Aid on it, saying, "There you go! All better." He gives your bare thigh a little pat, which makes your face heat up.

"Héctor, keep your hands to yourself," you say rudely, but he doesn't take offense, and just continues, "Feel better enough to keep playing?"

You nod and stand up with him, walking toward the volleyball court again.

Héctor had a bunch of friends over for his birthday.

Eighteen.

It leaves you with some questions.

He's older, now.

Legally, an adult.

And clearly Héctor has some questions, too, because for a moment, he whispers in your ear, "Will you be able to stay a little longer? After everyone else has left?"

You blink a few times, and can't help but blush. "That's fine. We can do that."

He nods, looking relieved. "Alright. Good. Let's do that."

So later, after a fun couple of hours, you watch the last of Héctor's friends leave.

So only the two of you remain.

He gently takes your hand, and you sit down on the couch together. "So," he begins. "I'm eighteen. I'm an adult now."

You nod slowly. "You are. Look at how much you've grown up," you tease, grinning.

He squeezes your hand. You stare at the two hands, connected. He smiles a bit, saying, "You've had all these months, of really getting to know me."

"I know," you smile. "And I think I like you."

He nods. "Enough...?"

"Enough for what?"

"I know I'm so much younger than you. But think about it. Now I'm eighteen. Eighteen and twenty-one is fine. I mean, Vitor's wife is older than him! He's eighteen!"

You smile softly. "Yeah, that's a good point."

"So?"

"So what?" you grin.

"Would you date me now?"

"Maybe I would," you say softly, feeling butterflies a little.

He grins wider. "Come on. Just say it. I know you like me back."

"Sure, Héctor," you roll your eyes. "I like you back."

He grins, and suddenly hugs you tightly- not what you were expecting, but you didn't know what to expect. "Oh, thank goodness," he mutters. "I've been waiting to hear you say that for months..."

You grin and hug him tighter back, "Yeah, yeah," you say, ruffling his hair. "I'm sure you have been."

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murkycran · 21 days

Text

Radiostatic/Voxal Fic Rec List

Welcome to my Radiostatic/Voxal Fic Rec List! ^_^ This will include romantic, platonic, and/or queerplatonic Radiostatic fics (and admittedly probably a couple of Radiosilence fics, too).

I will keep updating this periodically as I read more fics, so feel free to check back every once and a while! I'll reblog it when I update it, plus make a note with the date at the top. Trust me, this is by no means a complete list; there's fics I still want to add to this that I just haven't gotten to yet. I just decided to go ahead and post it anyways, because if I kept waiting until I ran out of fics to rec I'd probably be working on this forever.

These are not in any particular order; I'm going by both my Bookmarks list on AO3 and my memory of fics I forgot to bookmark. I also tried to make notes on what fics were written before season 1 released, but I might have missed some, so keep that in mind.

Please let me know if any links don't work or are wrong!

✨Before you proceed:✨ read the tags on these fics if you decide to read them. Many of them have heavy material - no surprise given the fandom, but still, felt like this needed said. On that note, there's also fics with explicit material and some fics are straight up PWP. Again, read at your own risk/heed the tags.

Fic Rec List Masterpost

Staticmoth Fic Rec List

Misc. Vox Fic Rec List

------

Radio Healed the Video Star by Aspiring_Forest_Witch

Summary: Alastor comes across an unconscious and battered Vox while out on one of his strolls. He feels compelled to bring him back to the hotel.

Notes: 98% of this fic was written before season 1 was released, so keep that in mind, because there's obviously going to be inconsistencies with canon. It's nearly finished (at least according to the author's notes in the latest chapters, I think). I suggest pacing yourself with this one - it's nearly 700k words long. I ruined a good sleep schedule staying up to get through it. (So worth it though.) There are quite a few OCs in later chapters, but they're such good OCs. You fall in love with them just as much as the canon characters, I swear. I would die for Verity and the Trio.

Let's Misbehave by joosymango

Summary: Alastor wins a bet against Vox, now his rival must stop pestering him for two weeks. It should be a pleasant break! So why does he miss the idiot?

Notes: Vaguely inspired by Aspiring_Forest_Witch's Radio Healed the Video Star. Also largely written before season 1 release. First fic I read for the HH fandom. ^_^

Safe with Me Series by rillo (rillyrillo)

Summary: Having only ever set his sights on men who treat women with odious disrespect, Alastor never thought he'd take interest in Vox's turbulent relationship with his fiancé and business partner, Valentino. He decides to lend a helping hand in the hopes of getting Vox out of his sticky situation. After all, what are childhood enemies for?

Unfortunately, neither Alastor nor Vox could've predicted the rollercoaster of unsaid emotions and future horrors that are thrown their way. Will they be able to rely on each other and get by unscathed? Or will destiny have other plans for these two?

[HUMAN AU] [There's art included for the human designs]

Notes: It's so, so good. ;-; Heed the tags. There's a prequel consisting of oneshots, plus a sequel (listed below, bc I can't not put it here)! And there's ART! So much art!

You, My Everything by rillo (rillyrillo)

Summary: Some say that love can conquer all, even in Hell.

Vox begged to differ, and he was damn well sure Alastor did too – or at least he would be, if Alastor hadn’t become one big question mark.

Sequel to Safe with Me.

Notes: Only read if you've read Safe With Me!!! Still pretty early in the story but so good. ;-; The angst, I swear...

You're on the Air by rillo (rillyrillo)

Summary: A series of short, daily conversations between a radio host and his avid listener, as the two learn more about each other’s lives over the air. Set in the late 90s/early 2000s.

Notes: Same author as Safe with Me, but not set in the same universe! This one is set up in a literal radio show format; almost entirely dialogue-centric.

Of Candied Pine and Cherried Smoke by rillo (rillyrillo)

Summary: Inspired by x_Arcticfox_x’s fanfiction: Blue Raspberries And Cherry Cola

After overdosing on them one too many times to curb the steadily weakening suppressants, Vox's body rejects them outright. Now with his scent getting stronger, he finds himself struggling to hide his true status as an Omega. In his desperation, he seeks help from the one person that knows his secret: Alastor.

Notes: Omegaverse. Same author as Safe with Me series and You're on the Air!

Blue Raspberries And Cherry Cola by x_Arcticfox_x

Summary: Vox is an omega, that's his biggest secret.

During his life time he hid this fact using suppressants, and counited to in death. One day he runs out of pills and his supplier is out of stock for the time being so Vox is forced to submit to the torture of going through heat for the first time in decades.

Too bad his business partner only see's omega's as mere object's...

But hey, at least Angel found him just in time, right?

Notes: Omegaverse. Currently on hold, but has 14 chapters currently available for reading. :)

Once Bitten, Twice Shy by The_Penny_Tails

Summary: Alastor decides that it's time to claim what is rightfully his, consequences be damned.

Notes: It's not porn but it might as well have been for how fucking intense this scene was. 😳

Dripping Pink by The_Penny_Tails

Summary: Just before an Overlord meeting, Alastor gets infected by an off-market, highly potent, and incredibly dangerous love potion. Nobody realises until it's too late.

Notes: Simultaneously funny as fuck and erotic as all hell. I suffered from so much secondhand embarrassment on Vox's behalf. It's wonderful. :D

Lucidity's Fog by The_Penny_Tails

Summary: Ever since he met Alastor, Vox has been having raunchy dreams about the deer. Those dreams suddenly stop when Alastor disappears. For seven years, he's free of the guilt, of the shame brought on by his unconscious desire.

Until Alastor comes back, and Vox is plagued by a new dream the same day he finds out about the news. This time, however, something is distinctively different about how the deer is acting.

Notes: Author tagged for light angst, but ngl the ending did not feel like 'light' angst to me lol. Hurt in a good way.

Finger Tips and Dotted Lips by The_Penny_Tails

Summary: Alastor has sensitive hands; he finds this out at the most inconvenient time possible. Unfortunately, Vox is the one who ends up paying the price for it.

Having to help a seemingly broken Overlord whilst navigating this new discovery proves to be a little more taxing than the Radio Demon could ever have imagined.

Notes: Alastor is such a troll in this omg.

Thawing Out by Seaside_Dreaming

Summary: Seeing a small crack in Vox's screen nags at Alastor more than he likes to admit.

Vox wishes things were better. Sooner or later, Alastor has to come to terms with the fact he has feelings, in general.

Notes: Written before season 1 release. HIGHLY suggest reading the prequel one-shot. It's not necessary to understand the plot here, but you should read it anyway.

Static by passthevoxcord

Summary: Vox creates a new and improved version of himself to please Val, only to be replaced by it. He is left beaten and broken with no one to turn to . . . except maybe his oldest enemy, Alastor.

Notes: Written before season 1 release.

Hating you feels so good by TwoBitJester

Summary: Vox obsesses over his returned enemy and finds himself a little too wound up

Notes: Very good PWP.

Laced Over Dinner by hazbinhearts

Summary: Vox is persuaded to dress a little differently over dinner for Alastor, but finds it remarkably uncomfortable as the night goes on. Written for VoxWeek21 Day 3: dressing up [appearance, formal, dance].

Notes: Written before season 1 release. Corsets. 😳

Observer by DeviousPossum

Summary: He moved the cursor to click off, when he suddenly heard a very recognizable static laced tone.

Alastor.

What the fuck. Alastor is singing.

Vox unintentionally ran claw marks across his desk, an increasingly common habit for him as of late. He grimaced at his now ruined table and unsuccessfully tried to reel in an inexplicable feeling that could only be described as jealousy.

Notes: Porn with a tiny bit of plot in the first chapter. :3

RadioTV Week 2021 Series by Heliosolar

Summary: Pretty much the title; various prompts.

Notes: Written before season 1 release. All worth reading, though they aren't connected.

Sharkblocking by Anonymous

Summary: Alastor is Vox’s number one rival. Incidentally, though nobody involved is aware of it, Alastor’s number one rival is actually Vox’s pet shark.

In which Alastor is actually a little obsessed back and Vark is the biggest obstacle to Radiostatic short of canon itself.

Notes: VARK!

Control + V by TooManyPsuedonyms

Summary: Vox and Alastor have a... thing. Not quite a relationship, but something. Vox is too scared to define it properly, and Alastor is dead set that Vox will eventually get bored of his lack of reciprocity and move on.

So, Valentino tries to show Vox what he is missing.

... too bad Vox didn't want him like that. ... too bad Alastor didn't know want is a vague word.

Notes: Heed the tags!!! There's currently a sequel; I haven't read it yet, but I definitely plan to. 👀

gift of the magi by vol_ctrl

Summary: "... Although husband and wife are now left with gifts that neither one can use, they realize how far they are willing to go to show their love for each other, and how priceless their love really is ..."

Alastor/Vox established relationship fluff.

Notes: Written before season 1 release. Very sweet. ^_^

the lost tape by vol_ctrl

Summary: There's a NEW ambitious media demon in Pentagram City. You never get a second chance to make a first impression, right?

Notes: Written before season 1 release.

12 Days of Yuletide by vol_ctrl

Summary: A parody of the 12 Days of Christmas traditional tune, as can only be done by Vox gifting to his beloved adversary.

Or, a series of letters from the desk of Alastor upon receiving a series of increasingly elaborate gifts from his insufferably modern foil during the holiday season.

Notes: Written before season 1 release.

Fear makes the heart grow fonder by Graysongirl

Summary: After a bit of inspiration from an unlikely source Vox comes up with the plan that scaring Alastor is the best route to gaining his affections. The haunted house at LuLu World seems like the perfect (safe) environment for a bit of pre-planned scaring...

[Stand-alone staticradio]

Notes: Written before season 1 release. Funny af. "Red! Red!" XD

Cordyceps, King of Ants by spappest

Summary: Vox is tired. Of Valentino. Of Velvette. Of Alastor, and Hell, and everything in between. He can't escape, but he can cut himself off, piece by piece, until he feels nothing at all. Alastor takes exception to this approach and commissions a certain princess of Hell to fix his foe. Now Vox has a hotel of misfits on one side of him, overlords on the other, and Alastor crushing his cage ever smaller.

Clearly, the only way Vox will get any peace and quiet is to just kill God.

Valentino did always tell him that he had no chill.

Notes: Started before season 1 was released. Technically features Staticmoth but it's not the focus as much as Radiostatic (which honestly has a relationship status of ??? not romantic but also not friendship or even strictly enemies...just...Alastor and Vox). O_O I think about this fic on a daily basis.

Russian Roulette by spappest

Summary: Vox and Alastor play a game that Vox is way too excited to lose.

Notes: Started before season 1 release. Take note!!! I'm putting this on the Radiostatic list because it's almost entirely centered on Alastor and Vox's dynamic, but the romantic relationship is Staticmoth. The Staticmoth is just not featured very much.

Vox and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Afterlife by spappest

Summary: Alastor goes into rut.

Vox has a bad time. Then a good time. Then a very bad time. Then a brief vacation. Then a confusing time.

Notes: Background Staticmoth, but Radiostatic is most prominent. Funny af. Alastor and Vox have...a very special relationship. Lol.

Killer Ex by FanGirl48

Summary: Alastor was a serial killer who valued his privacy. So when someone who claims to know what he is tries to barge into his life he can't let them live, his secret must be protected at all cost.

A normally easy task easy task becomes complicated when Alastor's ex-boyfriend is dragged into the whole thing forcing the serial killer to go visit them for the first time in seven years.

Notes: Human AU. Love me some possessive Alastor. <3

Negotiations by FanGirl48

Summary: Vox had no interest in attending a meeting between Heaven and Hell following the failed attack by the Adam and his Exterminators. Alastor's little gremlin caused the mess, so he can go clean it up. Vox had nothing wanted nothing to do with the radio demon, king of hell or heaven.

But that was before Lucifer made the media overlord aware of Valentino's little job offer to his daughter.

Damnit Valentino!

Notes: "And they were roommates!" "Oh my god they were roommates"

Down, Up, and Back Down by CowboyEnthusiast

Summary: Vox dies. Surprisingly no one takes this well.

Or, Vox dies and Alastor tries to drag his soul back from Purgatory.

Notes: Another fic I think about daily... Heavy themes. Heed the tags.

Hold Me Like a Grudge by Rachello344

Summary: Alastor has spent a long time running from Vox. Vox has chased after him almost as long. When suppressants fail throughout the city, they finally collide.

Notes: Omegaverse. Fun fact about this author: all their Radiostatic fic titles are from Fall Out Boy lyrics lol. (I fucking love FOB sue me.) I haven't yet read all of Rachello344's Radiostatic fics, BUT I have them all on my To Read list because I've loved everything I've read of theirs so far lol.

What Makes You So Special? by Rachello344

Summary: With Lucifer’s return to the Pride Ring, the other Deadly Sins were bound to take notice. When Asmodeus stops by the Pride Ring to visit the Morningstars, the Vees are able to make a deal to host a pop-up shop of the incredibly popular Lust Ring establishment, Ozzie’s, bringing it to the Pride Ring for the first time.

When Vox and Alastor both attend the restaurant’s opening night, long repressed sparks fly, forever changing their relationship.

Notes: Because of the pacing of this (sex first romance later), I feel like this is the Radiostatic equivalent of Femalefonzie's Freak-A-Zoid (a really good Staticmoth fic). This is hands down one of the most romantic Radiostatic fics I've read. ^_^

Hold Me Tight (or Don't) by Rachello344

Summary: Alastor and Vox finally come to an understanding, both of each other and of what they each mean to the other. Their relationship evolves accordingly, one concession at a time, until they both get everything they could possibly want: power, companionship, and even love.

Notes: So, so good.

Keep You Like an Oath by Rachello344

Summary: Alastor normally wouldn’t bother with the chore—breaking into V Tower was quite a lot of work, even for him—but he found himself curious about what Vox and his little friends might be working on. Especially since whatever it was had Angel concerned enough to report back to the rest of the hotel about it.

Of course, before he can learn anything, he’ll need to sneak past Vox’s watchful eye…

Notes: God it's just...so good. Read it. Radiostatic reconciliation. One thing I love about Rachello344 writing Radiostatic is Alastor's terms of endearment for Vox. ^_^

To Be Yours by pinegreenapples

Summary: Alastor hears something he hasn't heard in years. He decides to investigate why now, of all times, this frequency has turned back on. Vox is not amused.

Notes: Hurt no comfort. Hurts so good, though. ;-;

oleanders in june by spoondrifts

Summary: It seems like while Alastor was off preying on the self-destructive addictions of desperate sinners, Vox was off getting himself beaten half to death, probably from spouting belligerent nonsense at someone with violent tendencies and a far lower threshold for disrespect than Alastor. Not everyone finds poor Vox’s chatter as charming as he does.

If Vox is unconscious, then Vox is not being entertaining, and Alastor came here to have fun, not play nursemaid.

Or: Drunk on power and itching to cause some mayhem, Alastor hunts down the only person in the city who's always up for anything. Unfortunately, he finds Vox... not exactly in tip-top shape. No matter; he can work with that too.

Notes: ^_^ Very sweet.

equilibrium by curtailed

Summary: Post-Finale. The Hotel finds Alastor right on the front lawn, unconscious and bleeding, still injured from Adam's blade. While he recovers, all of Hell scrambles to find out who his mysterious rescuer is.

Meanwhile, Vox tries not to freak out that he might have accidentally made a soul bond to save that deer asshole's life. All he had wanted to do was to scope out the ruins of Alastor's radio tower. Fuck him for being curious, he supposed.

Notes: This fic has me in a CHOKEHOLD. I love the characterizations so, so much. Manages to fit in humor alongside the angst. One of the best fight scenes I've ever seen put into words. Curtailed really took Vox and Alastor as characters and planned out a cool fucking fight scene using their unique abilities. I automatically love anything tagged with "one fell first but the other fell harder" lol.

candlelight by curtailed

Summary: Despite the #SirRepentious success, Heaven remains skeptical of a sinner's ability to change. Logic gets lost somewhere, and really, what's a better way to show sinners can be marginally less horrible than to stick two Overlords who hate each other in the same living space?

Alastor and Vox play house.

Notes: The comedy of Alastor and Vox being forced to be civil with each other and then unintentionally becoming very domestic together. Lol

wallow by curtailed

Summary: A 2+1 fic. Two times when Alastor and Vox were in a love triangle (hard quote on love, hard quote on triangle), and the one time Alastor had Vox to himself.

Notes: Only 1 (very good) chapter so far, but safe to say pretty heavy already. Heed the tags.

Addicted by Dancingdog

Summary: After the latest argument with Valentino, Vox finds himself at the Hazbin Hotel. An injured Alastor is less-than-pleased to see him, which is understandable considering they are enemies.

But as more and more of Valentino's venom leaves his system, Vox begins to remember his days before V-Tower and he learns exactly why Alastor rejected his offer all those decades ago.

His memories return in fits and spurts - not all of them good. His past with Alastor isn't something he expected and it turns out that he isn't the only one suffering.

Notes: Dude. This fic hurt me. Such good angst.

Radio Made the Video Star Series by songofhell

Summary: Snippets of Vox and Alastor's afterlife, and their journey from strangers to friends to enemies to... something more.

Notes: Pretty much what the series summary says - a series of installments that chronicle the beginning and subsequent evolution of Alastor and Vox's relationship. Very good, has tons of possessive!Alastor, which I die for.

Uneasy by Saezs

Summary: “Something’s wrong with Voxy.”

Velvette’s eyes snapped to the tall moth pimp. “And?” she prompted with a raised eyebrow. As if she needed to deal with two piss babies this close to a show. Valentino shrugged, tapping away on his phone, and walked away to stand threateningly close to her new models. Before she could snap at him, she saw it; his wings were twitching. Barely noticeable to strangers, just under the hum of the building’s lights, he was squeaking with each tap of his fingers. She felt unease and a healthy dose of aggravation swirl in her stomach.

Or: Vox was roofied and sexually assaulted. Velvette tries to be better than her mother. Unexpected connections are formed.

Notes: Heed the tags! Features genderfluid Vox. :)

Five Times Vox and Alastor Danced and One Time They Didn't by Drowsy_Salamander

Summary: “I say, good fellow, what are you doing on the ground like that?”

The voice was perky, cheerful, and bright. It had a crisp mid-Atlantic accent, the kind Vox remembered being all the rage for stage and film performers back when he first entered the broadcast industry. The diction was crystal clear with every sound enunciated separately to maximise clarity, the consonants clicked and the vowels were broad. It was a performer’s voice.

A voice for radio.

Oh shit.

... Five times Vox and Alastor danced and one time Vox and Alastor didn't.

From their first meeting through their friendship, to their enmity and fighting. From infatuation to yearning to animosity. Dancing is a partnership, is it not?

Notes: Each chapter so far has been a different type of dance, which is really neat. Especially chapter 2. ^_^ That said, there's a feeling of impending doom, knowing what happens to their relationship eventually... Not saying that as a deterrent but just a comment on how I felt while reading it lol. It's very sweet, which is why it hurts to think of future chapters. 🙃

Days Long Past by Momo52

Summary: All sinners of hell bore some physical marks of how they lived and died. Some physical manifestations were more obvious while others were subtle. Vox was not an exception to this rule.

While his television head was an obvious indication of his life while on Earth, the mark he bore from his death was far more subdued. Luckily enough, his shame was easily concealed behind a high collar. Unfortunately, he is just as well known in his afterlife as he was in his life. As such, trying to make everyone believe that he is so much stronger than what his death implies is a constant battle. He only wished that he wasn’t the hardest one to convince.

Notes: I think platonic Radiostatic is the endgame here. Still pretty early in the story, but I'm really liking this author's depiction of Vox and Alastor's pasts. Heed the tags. There are heavy subjects such as suicide (very big theme for Vox's pov) and period-typical racism (in Alastor's past) present in the story.

Remote Access by x-UsoTsuki-x (its_not_reael)

Summary: In the aftermath of Alastor and Vox's electrifying on-air showdown, Vox finds himself unusually rattled. His usual suave demeanor is slipping, much to his cohorts' amusement – and concern. Velvet can do little more than roll her eyes at his antics. Valentino, on the other hand, is convinced that all Vox needs to do is get fucked and relax.

or, alternatively...

The tech-savvy overlord manages to snag a virus from a porn site and finds himself in the arms of his worst enemy.

Notes: Fairly certain this is firmly Radiosilence based on the tags (and the direction of the story so far). Very funny, very hot. Vox is pathetic in this one. Lol

Nun-thing Like You've Ever Seen Series by A_Cypress_Coffin

Summary: Alastor, the feared radio demon with more blood on his hands than most of hell combined, wasn't always as we imagine him. There was a time where instead of a dapper suit and smile he donned a simple vow and habit. That didn't last of course, but the journey is quite something.

Notes: This author has a great sense of humor, lmao. I enjoyed the unique headcanons for Alastor's backstory. The tag that hooked me: "Accidentally becoming a better person through bad domming and found family".

Empathia by The_Oblivious_Swallow

Summary: Creating new technology is boring, sex is physically unappealing, the other Vee’s are so annoying, annoying, annoying! Even Vark, his baby, his pride and joy, doesn’t stir the same joy in his heart like he should.

So, Vox had concluded that it had to go. For his sake.

Notes: Contains Staticmoth, but Radiostatic seems like the endgame (I write this as there is one chapter still left). Really interesting idea. I love Vox.exe so much. ;-;

Every Madman Has His Vice by phantasm_png (chibellero)

Summary: “What the fuck do you want, Alastor? Was it not enough to kill me all those years ago? Now, you had to go for the people I loved and the only things I had left in this fucking Hellhole?”

“It was my fault,” Alastor whispers as he approaches Vox slowly, as if he was some sort of wounded animal he didn’t want to scare off. His prey. “Vox, I’m sorry. If I had a chance to redo that night, I would never have hurt you to this extent. I’ll never harm you again.”

“That’s seven years too fucking late, Alastor.”

OR: Seven years ago, instead of Alastor disappearing, it was Vox who left instead.

Notes: I’m so fucking here for this AU. Possessive Alastor, Vox helping with the hotel, Husk is still an Overlord, yessss

Metathesiophobia (Fear of Change) by phantasm_png (chibellero)

Summary: There's a lot that can change in seven years.

But never once had Alastor expected for something like this from his old rival and older friend.

Or, Alastor and Vox start to rekindle their old friendship again after a shocking discovery strikes the deer demon.

Notes: QPR Radiostatic with MtF Vox! Contains a smidge of Staticmoth, but it's in the background and not the focus. Very well written.

surimi and venison by phantasm_png (chibellero)

Summary: A series of short drabbles (500+ words) in an interconnected universe (peep the tags, they're still in hell), centering around Alastor and his new pet fish... shark... television thing. Will (hopefully) update 1-2 times a week. Written as my attempt at a Mermay series.

Notes: Like the summary says, Mermay prompts featuring SharkHybrid!Vox, along with Alastor, who literally saw Vox and decided to make him his pet. Lol.

an arm and a leg, my dear, les yeux d'la tête by phantasm_png (chibellero)

Summary: “I mean, usually when Val gets mad he gets like, super pissy too an’ starts destroyin’ shit ‘round the set and in his clubs, but like, usually Vox can calm him down. Problem is, where the Hell is that guy? I haven’t seen ‘im round the Tower for like, a month or two now. That ain’t normal.”

“What, so you mean he just up and left?”

“No, but like… he hasn’t been seen ‘in public’ for like, two months now. It’s startin’ to get suspicious. Like, I ‘unno if I’m just paranoid or something, but… Vox is like, the fuckin’ face of Hell’s Entertainment District. When he’s not round for a bit, that’s nothing to worry about on its own… but when he’s not round for a bit an’ Val and Velvette are creeping around, looking for his rival…? I mean… the dots are connecting. If Al did something…”

“If Vox was dead, we would know.” OR: Two months ago, Vox went missing. Right now, it seems as if Alastor has something to hide.

Notes: Vox gets attic-wifed and wears a virgin killer sweater. ^_^

we'll go down together in the ashes of our love by phantasm_png (chibellero)

Summary: Glimpses into the Radio Demon's life as he reluctantly navigates parenthood with his co-parenting partner and the demon princess hoisted onto him by the King and Queen of Hell.

Loosely inspired by Spy X Family.

Notes: CUTE! I love domestic Radiostatic.

What Has Been by Tianren

Summary: Vox has never known peace. From being the son of a egocentric cult leader, to being the boyfriend of a self absorbed abuser. Vox has managed to build a pretty sad life for himself. The only spot of sunshine that had ever blessed his existence was when he met an amateur true crime investigative journalist, with a podcast named, Alastor. The man was his only source of unfiltered news and contact to the world outside his father’s compound. But after Vox finally escaped the cult he waited for Alastor. Waited weeks in their assigned meeting spot just to be forgotten. Vox was convinced he’d stopped waiting for Alastor years ago until he meets the man again seven years later at a hotel. What will reconnecting with his past lead to and will it help him escape the hell he’s built for himself?

Takes place in the late 2000s early 2010s

Trigger warning for religious trauma and abuse as major themes of this story. Will add more warnings if they arise as I go on.

Notes: Really interesting human AU concept!

(Fic rec list to be continued)

#hazbin hotel #radiostatic #voxal #hazbin alastor #hazbin vox #fic rec list

103 notes · View notes

moongothic · 3 months

Text

This is gonna turn into some Crocodad Propaganda eventually but putting the man aside for a little bit

Let's be real for a moment. Regardless of who Luffy's other biological parent is, regardless of if they're relevant to the story or not, no matter what has become of that person, if they're dead or somewhere out there alive, etc-- I believe Oda "knows the truth".

Although it took One Piece until post-Enies Lobby to reveal some of Luffy's blood relatives to us, Oda had technically introduced both Garp and Dragon to us all the way back in the East Blue saga. And Ace was introduced not too long after in the Baroque Works saga, along with his tattoo which held that secret tribute to Sabo all along. (Also he was introduced as "Portgaz D. Ace" meaning Oda must've intended to make the two non-blood brothers from the get-go.) All this means that Luffy's family, both adopted and blood relatives, have been in Oda's mind from the very begining of the story. And so if Oda had figured out Luffy's grandfather, father and at least one brother (if not both) from the begining, then why would he not have decided what became of the person who gave birth to the idiot as well? Like considdering how detail-oriented and meticulous Oda can be, would it not be unusual for him to essentially forget about a character that important (in the sense that Luffy literally would not exist without them) and just handwave them away without much thought? Would that not be out of character for Oda? As such, I don't think it is not unreasonable for us to believe that Oda would know what happened to Luffy's other bio-parent. Mind you, it really could be just something like "Luffy's mother died of The Disease when Luffy was a baby", or "the mom fell down the stairs" or "was eaten by a bear in the woods" or something, anything, whatever. Even if it truly does not matter to the story one bit, I'm sure Oda knows the truth of what happened and why that character wasn't a part of Luffy's life.

But at the same time, if the identity and the fate of Luffy's birthing parent truly did not matter to the story at all, then why wouldn't Oda just tell us who that was and what happened to them? In an SBS or an interview? It's not like people haven't been asking about it, because fans and staff alike have been asking about it for years. If the information really would not change anything, be it the direction the story will take or how we view the characters, if it really is just worthless trivia, then why keep it away from us?

Now of course, I'm sure you'd want to point out that one time Oda told Mayumi Tanaka that "A young boy's adventure begins after he leaves his mother's arms. I want to tell this young boy's adventure story, so his mom is not part of it." And Oda isn't known for lying, we do kind of want to take what he told Mayumi Tanaka at face value. At the same time though. If Luffy's other parent did become a plot relevant character in like the final 200 chapters of the story, after a 1100 chapters, they and their potential connection to Luffy would not have mattered to the story for 90% of its run. For an overwhealming majority of Luffy's adventure, that person would not have been a part of it. So if that character did become relevant, and Oda was lying, then it'd be a white lie at worst. But also, if Oda did intend to reveal that other parent eventually, when the time was right, then surely he wouldn't want to get people hyped up about it way ahead of time. If it did turn out to be a big plot twist or an otherwise important plot point, Oda would want to keep it under the wraps and a secret until the right time, you don't want to spoil something like that. Not to mention it could end up working like a distraction and make people not focus on the more important things happening in the story currently. So really, I think we'd all forgive him for a white lie there. Not to mention, technically speaking, if Luffy doesn't even have a mom but two dads, then Oda wouldn't really be lying either.

But that does bring up an important thing to considder.

If Crocodile does turn out to be Luffy's other dad, when did Oda get that idea, and when would he have committed to it?

Because, keep in mind, One Piece began back in 1997. Twenty seven whole years ago. Which means there's two things to considder; the evolution of queer rights over the past near three decades, as well as the fact that One Piece has more than surpassed Oda's original plans for the series. We must not forget how for a manga to remain serialized in Weekly Shounen JUMP, you need to perform well in the popularity polls consistently; if your manga starts dropping in popularity, JUMP can cancel it and force you end it prematurely. Of course, Oda arguably does not have to worry about those polls anymore after all these decades, there's no way in hell JUMP would ever cancel fucking One Piece in this day and age. But that might not have been the case 15 years ago, that was not the case 20 years ago, and that was absolutely not the fucking case 25 years ago. Like we all famously know that Oda originally planned One Piece to maybe run for like a year, then five years, then ten etc etc. That really is because at the begining of his career he had no quarantee he'd be able to tell the full story he was slow cooking at the back of his mind. Back in the early days, One Piece could've been canceled and ended prematurely, so Oda smartly chose to write it focusing very specifically on what mattered to the story at that moment, in the short term. Yes, he did start laying out the groundwork for things to come, but he did it so subtly that had OP been forced to end early, the series wouldn't have been left with too many massive, gaping plotholes or unresolved sidestories. Another thing to keep in mind is how comic artists for JUMP do have editors etc who can have a say in what goes into the manga (famously, Sasuke only existed because Matashi Kishimoto's editor suggested it). So again, while Oda might be able to do whatever the hell he pleases in One Piece at this point, that wouldn't have been the case 20+ years ago. He would have been more or less at the whims of his editors back in the day.

So would Oda have thought about giving Luffy, the main character of the series, a transgender father back in the year 2000? Could that really have been the secret plan from the start? And would Oda's editor(s) at JUMP have allowed that? Or, did Oda maybe come up with the idea later?

Now just so we're clear, I am NOT suggesting Crocodad was Oda's original intent and that his editors didn't let him do it or anything like that, my tinfoil hat isn't on that fucking tight. What I do want to suggest, is that it is plausible Crocodile being Luffy's other dad was an idea Oda was playing around with at the back of his mind from the begining, but wasn't sure he'd ever get to, mainly due to the uncertainty of series' future and partially because he could've been unsure if his editors would even allow him to write that story. And IF this was the case, Oda may not have even started committing to to the idea until around the CP9 saga. Or, it's possible Oda only got the idea sometime after the completion of the Alabasta arc/during Skypiea saga, and started laying down the groundwork for during Summit War so that, if he ever got around to it, he'd be able to commit and tell that story.

Regardless, let's be real.

It is interesting and kind of suspicious how Crocodile does just happen to be introduced around the same time the rest of Luffy's family was first shown to us, even if we didn't know Garp and Dragon were Luffy's family yet (this was also the same time the first canon queer character was introduced; Oda was playing around with queer characters during Crocodile's introduction, possibly testing the waters to see what he could get away with?) During the CP9 Saga we got the Miss Goldenweek cover story, where we see what's become of Crocodile after the fall of Baroque Works. This is of course adding to the world building of the CP9 Saga (where we're told the criminals who go through Enies Lobby are either sent to Impel Down or to Marineford; so us finding out Crocodile's gone to ID is playing off of what we knew would become of Robin and Franky and the Strawhats not come to rescue them. AND it's foreshadowing for the Summit War Saga), but also, soon after we were reminded of Crocodile and told where he's been sent off to, we were finally formally introduced to Garp and Dragon (Garp having already been mentioned by Aokiji at the begining of the Saga). And we close off the Saga watching Ace and Blackbeard have their fateful match. So again, Crocodile was on Oda's mind around the same time the rest of Luffy's family was. And indeed, after Thriller Bark we then move onto Summit War proper, where Oda does all The Things we would considder The Groundwork for Crocodad, most important being the introduction of Ivankov and their Devil Fruit. But again, just like before, Crocodile just happens to be there at the same time as this saga, which really heavily focuses on Luffy's family, plays out. While we learn about Dragon's secretive nature and connection to Iva-chan, Garp's feelings for the boys, Ace's struggle with his heritage and Luffy's love for him, Sabo and Garp... Yeah, Crocodile's just... Also there.

Whenever Oda starts dwelling into Luffy's family, Crocodile is always there. It's a bizarre coincidence if nothing else.

(And oh won't you look at that, Crocodile has once again become a plot relevant character, just in time for The Final Saga where Dragon has also started becoming actually plot relevant as well)

All of this to say, again.

The fact that Oda has refused to tell us anything about Luffy's other parent is sus, and to me indicates that either although unusual for him Oda genuinely just doesn't give a damn about Luffy's other parent, or he's been trying to play it safe for years so that if he ever got the opportunity, he could give Luffy two dads. (Or maybe there's some other twist that has nothing to do with Crocodile, that is possible too, I just feel like if that was the case then why hide it for 27 years?)

Whatever the case, I'm sure Oda knows the truth.

And I'm sure we will find out the truth eventually, be it on the pages of the comic or in the SBS.

#Moon posting #OP Meta #Crocodad #This got so fucking long. Under the Read More you go #Hey Anon. Funny you should send that ask about those interviews from Oda when I was literally in the middle of writing this #What're the fucking odds lmao #Anyway Anon I hope you see this because I'm not going to answer to your ask *separately* since this post goes over the same stuff #Like it's not exactly what this post is REALLY about but since I go over it. Yeah discussing it once should be enough lol #The funny thing is that this post really was supposed to be more about how Croc's appearances in the story match the rest of Luffy's family #But I had too many things to say and I figured I might as well put all this shit into one post (for better or for worse)

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geekundercover · 2 months

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X-Men ‘97 episode 1x3 thoughts! Just wanted to elaborate a bit on some of the stuff we saw in Madelyne’s hellscape, namely the nightmare visions for Gambit and Morph, since it feels like there’s some room to interpret with those two as compared to the other members that have had their inner conflicts explored a bit already or are pretty straightforward.

With Gambit, the vision of Rogue and Magneto does seem to go beyond ‘the woman I love is hooking up with another man’ and hits at some deeper insecurity about himself and his character. The vision of Rogue is calling him out as not a good person, not a worthy person, at least not compared to Magneto. It seems like deep down, Gambit does feel an admiration for Magneto despite their previous status as enemies; he’s convicted, he’s a leader, he’s a savior of mutants, and some part of Gambit ranks himself as lesser by comparison, just a ‘nasty, thieving critter’. Magneto is a hero, and by implication, Gambit is not. That’s kinda sad to think about, since Gambit has helped save the world multiple times at this point and has made plenty of selfless actions in the process, but he has always held himself at a bit of a remove from the team and the cause they’re fighting for. Maybe that’s finally starting to get to him, or maybe has always bugged him on some level but his difficulties with trust have never let him overcome that self-enforced distance. If this is laying the groundwork for some sort of character arc, one where Gambit does seek to become more of what he sees as a worthy man, more of a hero, and whether or not that takes a positive or negative trajectory for him, I’m super interested to see it.

As for Morph... Listen, I've been making Morph x Wolverine jokes just like everyone else, they've been Like That since the OG series, but at this point I'm genuinely and seriously sure that Morph is in love with Logan and that's the core of their nightmare vision. Sure, the obvious terror fuel is their Sinister-based trauma, but listen to what Sinister said to them and the context in which he said it: They just left a conversation where they, Logan, and Gambit were discussing relationship woes, and after Logan ditched them to go check on Jean, they looked bummed and said "and then there was Morph." Left alone. Then the visions start, and Morph gets a very naked Logan posing sexily in the shower. Sure they try to make a very "boys in the locker room" sort of joke out of it, but come on Morph, there is no heterosexual explanation (and I do not say that lightly) for going to bug your buddy in the shower by offering to help him with "hard to reach spaces." Then the Sinister quote: "Always with the jokes, eh, Morph? As if I don't know. As if we ALL don't know." I genuinely think Morph is mega gay for Wolverine and is trying to hide it from everyone badly. They may all be mutants, but it is still the 90s, and just because they all have being a mutant in common with each other doesn't mean they're all on the same page in terms of queerness. Again, if this is the case, it's sad to think about. At this point in the animated canon, Morph and Wolverine make FAR more sense as a pairing than Logan and Jean ever did. Logan never gave up on Morph after they were brainwashed in the OG series, went to the literal ends of the earth to bring them back home, so it's no wonder if Morph caught Big Feelings about it but is scared to actually be honest about them.

#x-men 97

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markantonys · 1 month

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the implications that show!mat being a hero of the horn has on cauthor have not yet been fully explored! because i'm 90% sure the dragon is also a hero of the horn or hero-adjacent, which would mean mat's and rand's souls are eternally linked to each other in that way. do they get to hang out together in TAR between lifetimes? at the very least, mat would be hanging out in TAR so even though he has a normal non-channeler lifespan and will die before his channeler loved ones, the wondergirls can still visit him in TAR after he dies (rand too if he retains his channeler long lifespan post-TLB idk) and tell him all about how the avimatrandlayne great-grandkids are doing. mat can protect the great-grandkids and all their descendants in their dreams like birgitte does!!!!

also, maybe mat and rand have been born at the same time in other lifetimes too, and will be again! maybe they've saved the world together infinite times! maybe when it's amaresu's soul's turn to save the world, she will call the heroes to fight with her and mat's and rand's souls will show up together as a Battle Couple! maybe the first time mat talks about rand to birgitte in this life she's like "oh i see nothing's changed" "what?" "you're in love with the dragon in every lifetime" "WHAT"

in conclusion, move over birgitte and gaidal, we've got a new pair of Hero Of The Horn Soulmates in town.

#me: honestly not a fan of the idea of soulmates man Love Is A Choice is what I'M all about #me when the possibility of *cauthor* eternal soulmates is on the table: this is peak romance actually #cauthor #mat cauthon #rand al'thor #wot #wot on prime #the wheel of time #wot book spoilers

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shayyprasad · 5 months

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weighing scale

tw: eating disorder (purging, not eating), bodyshaming, ed shaming

btw, if it's requested, i can turn drabbles into full oneshots!!!!!!!!!!!!!

you guys are beautiful the way you are, and nothing anybody ever says or does will ever change that. remember that gaining weight is totally normal, and you can always lose weight, too, but please, do it in a healthy way. if you ever need anyone to talk to, and this isn't just for eds, i'm here, and you can reach out. if not, there are people who care about you and love you.

you're amazing you beautiful mfs

(also i'm sorry if this might not be correct for you, everyone has different experiences with eds)

(also, also, i did 1st person ... and this is just the way i thought when i was going thru this so i kinda made it relate w/ me??)

100.

98.

96.

she watched as the numbers went down, satisfied despite the fact that it was only one pound less yesterday.

90.

88.

even if it meant that she'd always be cold, or that her hair would fall out. it was a small price to pay to be beautiful. to be skinny. to be like all the other girls that peter liked.

y/n kept telling herself that. and it was enough to keep her going.

{four weeks prior}

(first person)

they had little packets for us to take home, like forms. something along the lines of "annual health check-up." the form was just... well, it wasn't a form, really, but more of an opt-out. the paper said they'd just check weight, height, and some other things, like make sure you didn't have scoliosis.

honestly?

i was just happy to be missing a good chunk of math.

everyone got called down to the gym by period, and mine was 5th period, right before lunch.

our class was waiting for them to call us down, so mr. callen just let us do whatever until then. i glanced over to see liz, kayla, and chloe in the corner of the classroom, giggling and pointing towards some of the boys, and eventually, mr. callen.

he was one of the youngest members on faculty, fresh out of college. and i'll admit, he's not bad looking. in fact, he's hotter than most of the guys. and if it wasn't peter that had my heart, maybe i'd think about someone else.

not that the whole peter thing was going great anyways, he seemed interested in liz. so maybe that was my hint to move on. but i don't know. i've just liked him forever, it'd feel wrong to stop now.

i'm just really loyal, i guess.

or maybe this is some weird first love/crush thing, because no matter what, i keep finding myself coming back to him.

it took me second to realize that i'd been staring at the same spot for a while now, so i probably looked funny. i re-adjusted my position and looked at the clock, noting there there was just a few minutes until we'd have to go down.

i looked by at the girls, then at the teacher. did they not realize that he had an engagement ring on? or where they just dense?

because honestly, i'm having a hard time figuring out which one it is.

liz pushed chloe over to the desk, giggling like a manic.

chloe bit her lip, trying to hold in laughter. "hiiii, cal. you know, like, cupid's day is coming?"

me, personally, i didn't really believe in the whole dumb blonde thing, but chloe was changing my aspect on this.

cupid's day was on valentine's day, and you could pay a dollar to have a rose delivered to someone. normally, the freshmen girls did most of the planning. freshmen girls were annoying. they were always together, and i didn't remember a time i'd seen one alone.

i didn't get any on my first year here. last year i got three. but it didn't really count, because mj got me one and betty did. i was hoping that i'd figure out who the third person was, but three weeks into that investigation, i kinda gave up. if they hadn't revealed themselves to me at that point, i'd figured that they probably wouldn't.

maybe junior year will go better.

if you were popular popular, you got at least seven, so it was kind of embarrasing to only get one. and it was probably even more embarrasing to only have, like, one friend. which was betty. but she hadn't hung around me that often since she started dating ned.

mj was an observer, and i knew that much. it was probably the only reason she got me a rose, because she felt bad. but then again, anyone could see how pathetic it was.

peter and i used to be pretty close, but then he met ned, so the attention he gave me got halved.

i would have tried to be friends with ned, because i know he's really nice, but i stressed out too much about it for some reason and gave up. social anxiety, perhaps? it didn't matter, it was too late to do anything about it now.

after that, peter started hanging around liz and some of the other popular kids, and entirely forgot about me.

did forget about ned, though. maybe beacuse i was a girl, and so peter got called "gay" a lot for that. i didn't have much of a chance compared to liz, so i just admired him from afar. it's not that we didn't talk, because we did sometimes, but... actually, i don't know what.

if peter wanted to, he would have.

and it's fairly obvious, but i'm delusional and chose to ignore that.

the intercom snapped me out of whatever zoning out i'd gone back to, "block d, block d. i-is this on? oh, it is? i- yes, block d down to the gym."

everyone got up and pushed their way out the door, i didn't have that type of energy, so i just waited for everyone to get their butts outta the way and then went myself. i followed them down to the hall, staying behind a little. when i finally got over there, i ended up last, right behind chloe, kayla, then liz.

for the most part, it only took a minute or two for each person, so the line didn't take that long.

well, i suppose that's subjective.

it took 15 minutes, but whatever.

when liz was inside, she didn't take care to close the door all the way, leaving it a couple inches open. that's on her.

that's on her for being irresponsible, so it's not really my fault if i accidently hear. i leaned in a little, suddenly very interested in the wall, with all it's cracks... and... paint, and...

"and step on the scale, please... that is," she paused, and you could hear scribbling of a pen.

"121.3 pounds. perfectly healthy. that's actually the average weight for girls your age," another pause, "make sure to give this form to your parents. have a nice day."

liz said something in return and i stepped back, done admiring the wall. "next!" the lady called in.

i stepped inside the room, and it smelt strongly of hand-sanitizer. "okay, honey, step up against the wall... height is... alrightly. now the scale, please."

i did as she asked, keeping my eyes trained on the numbers.

149.7 pounds. basically 150. that was more than liz's, right?

"149, okay, you're good to go-"

"is that around average weight?" i asked, and it was impulsive, i didn't even think.

"well, it's somewhere around that. you're perfectly healthy."

the intercom came on again, signaling my time was over, and the lady thought the same thing, because she ushered me out.

as i walked back to the classroom, i couldn't help but think;

149? no, 150? around average? so basically, i was above average. 30 pounds heavier than liz? no wonder peter likes liz better.

god, that's disgusting. i'm disgusting.

i trudged back to class, unable to stop thinking about it. and suddenly, an idea popped into my mind; why not lose weight? if i lost a little, maybe peter would care about me again.

that's genius. god, i'm a genius.

yeah. i lose a little weight.

when i got back, he'd already started the lesson, not that i cared. i spent the rest of that class figuring out the kinks, like how many calories i'm allowed to eat per day.

i settled on 800.

it seemed like a decent number if i wanted to actually make an impact with weight loss.

stupid kale smoothies weren't gonna get me anywhere, nor idiotic influencer workout routines.

before i knew it, the bell rung and kids were hustling through the hallways. i was kind of on autopilot as i walked to lunch, not really watching where i was going. i'd by mistake shouldered some people, and they gave me dirty looks. i shot them right back.

i couldn't help but silently, in my mind, judge everyone's body that i saw. and not just their body, but other physical features, too. it was automatic, i didn't even mean to. but i couldn't help it.

she's really fat. the gym exists for a reason.

how is she so skinny? i know she's anorexic.

and it just went on and on.

i didn't know what was going on. why this mattered to me all of a sudden.

it was like i didn't notice these things before, i wasn't looking for them, but now that i knew they were there, i couldn't help it.

i couldn't help a lot of things.

when i walked into the lunchroom, i saw peter sitting by himself, writing on some piece of paper, and if i knew him, he wasn't doing the homework due tomorrow.

he was doing yesterday's.

it didn't seem like i'd be bothering him if i went to go talk to him, so that's what i did. i figured since we hadn't talked in while, it would be great to now.

and it'd be a great distraction, too.

i sat down across from him, "hi, peter."

he looked up slowly, a smile rising on his face. "uh, hey, y/n/n," peter paused, "what, um, what did you need?"

"huh? oh, i didn't need anything. just thought i'd come by and annoy the hell out of you."

"just like old times," peter snorted.

"math homework?"

"yep. i have math-"

"-next period," i realized my mistake after i made it. "um, 'cause i see you when i'm walking to class."

in repsonse, he nodded like he was considering it.

i didn't notice i was hungry until my stomach growled, but something inside of me made the thought of getting food and eating it repulsive. i hesitated before grabbing on of peter's fries and popping it in my mouth. he didn't say anything, or really even care, and i didn't know if i liked that or not.

"okay. you have chem next, yeah?"

i blushed at the fact he knew.

"uh, yep," i snagged some more fries, feeling myself loosen up.

and then i realized, that's what this was; i was just in need of some time with actual people who weren't my parents.

i liked this. i liked talking to peter. it was easy. this was easy.

we laughed about some other things, like flash's new donkey haircut.

and i stole more fries. ned, betty, and mj (who normally sat two seats away) came over. the topic of cupid's day came up.

"how many do you think you'll get?" betty asked.

i looked up, "roses?"

"uh-huh."

ned spoke up, "you won't need to worry, bet, i'll get you a whole bouquet." he looked proud of himself.

"i'm not worried," she giggled, like the lovesick fool she was. it was gross. and yes i admit, it was slightly because i was jealous, but whatever. betty didn't have to act so idiotic and desperate.

betty's skinny, too.

"what about you, y/n?" peter said, locking eyes with me.

"i dunno. i never really get any."

something changed in peter's expression, but as soon as it was there, it was gone.

i took another fry. they were really good, for some reason.

"fattie," peter laughed, pulling his lunch tray back, "and then you complain about not getting roses!"

that caused a round of laughs in the small group, but my heart dropped to my feet.

i was right. i was overweight. even peter noticed.

freaking peter noticed.

god, i was ugly and fat, and even peter saw that.

of course he liked liz. he'd be crazy not to. she was curvy and skinny and petite and pretty and skinny.

she was skinny.

i didn't have her hourglass figure.

never did i ever want out of my own skin more.

"y/n?" pete frowned. "i-i'm sorry, it was a joke, i didn't-"

"no, no, not that. i, uh, i... forgot i was supposed to meet with a teacher. sorry. i have to go."

i didn't go to any teachers.

i did go to the bathroom.

and i hid in the handicapped stall. i didn't cry, or sob, or weep or whatever it was stupid girls did in hallmark movies or stuff.

i stood in front of the mirror and picked out everything i hated, making a mental list in my head.

i didn't finish that list, not even after 30 minutes when the bell rung.

the rest of the day flew by rather quickly, it seemed. i felt like i was trapped in a warm haze, but not the fuzzy, happy warmth. i didn't like the way i was thinking. it's like i wanted my brain to turn off, these intruding, ugly thoughts were taking up too much room.

i felt icky.

when i got home, i didn't have my normal after-school snack like i usually did. i went straight upstairs and did homework.

i finished two essays (one that wasn't due until two weeks, and one that was due two days from now), my math homework and studied for my math test, started my science project, and did my french flashcards (and studied them a bit).

i must have been locked in my room for hours, because by the time i got up, it was dark outside.

i wasn't a studious person, and the only reason i did any of this was to forget for a little while. to snap out of it. and for a while, it worked.

"y/n, honey!" my mom screamed from downstairs, and as i glanced at the clock, i realized it was time to have dinner.

but i wasn't hungry.

well, i was.

let me rephrase that; i didn't want to eat.

however, i didn't want my mother yelling at me, so i went down anyways. not that i was planning to eat.

"mom?"

"oh, hey. i already set the table, you seemed like you were working hard and i didn't wanna bother you. dad's working late. go sit down-"

"not hungry."

she frowned. "well, you have to eat something."

"but i'm not hungry," i said, hating how sharply it came out.

my mom gave me warning look. "look, i've had a long day, so don't start with me."

"mommmm," i whined.

"sit."

so i did. i felt bad about bothering her.

i ate. small, tentative bites, forcing it all down. we didn't talk.

silently, i put my dish in the sink, before heading upstairs. the food sat at the bottom of my stomach, like a pile of heavy rocks. i wanted them out.

so i turned on the shower and locked the bathroom door, kneeling in front of the toilet. i pressed my fingers to the back of my throat and kept them there for a second. at first, all i got was bile.

but then i threw up.

peter and i started talking more again. i think he got in a fight with liz.

i asked him if they were dating, and he said no.

i think he started hanging out with me again because i got skinny. i know for a fact that i'm skinnier than liz. i weigh less then her now.

the numbers told me that.

but i didn't listen.

i didn't stop, and how could i? when i'd gotten this far?

we got in a fight. not the yelling kind, though. well, kind of. i yelled a bit.

i thought he was complimenting me. he said i looked skinny, so i thanked him.

"no... i-" he paused, trying to get his thoughts together, "you look skinny, yes, but not in a good way."

"what? what do you mean? like, there's only a good way," i laughed, slightly nervous.

peter ingnored that. "have you been eating enough, angel?" his voice was soft, but there was worry in it. why was he worried? this is the best i've ever been.

"do you ask liz that, too?"

"i- what?"

"liz is skinny. you don't ask her that."

"that- that is different. y-you haven't been eating, have you? is-"

"god, parker! stop! it's none of your business!" maybe if i hadn't been so flustered, i'd have come up with a better comeback.

i was hunched over the toilet, but nothing was coming out. everything hurt.

my head. my stomach.

my throat was scratchy and raw.

i didn't hear the knocking on the door.

i don't really remember peter coming in. i thought i locked it. what was he doing at my house? i couldn't remember.

i wanted to sleep.

i think i was crying. i don't know. i only vaguely remember the hot tears.

i slightly remember him pulling me away from the toilet and into his arms. there were lots of holes in my memory for that day.

he stayed with me, though. one thing i'm sure about is that peter never left my side. i can recall bright lights. tubes. i was laying on something. white walls. white sheets.

what was engraved into my head was peter whispering "i love you" over and over again. in the bathroom. in the car. was it a car? as they hooked me up to cables.

all that mattered, though, was that i was skinny now. just the thought made me feel light and airy.

to think that all it took was a little motivation and a weighing scale.

#reader discretion advised #tw ed #tom holland x reader #spiderman #tom holland #peter parker #peter parker x you

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