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#A CARD WITHOUT NAOMI
tojikai · 7 months
Text
Sundered 8: BRAKES
Pairing: Gojo x reader
• Part 1  |  Part 2   | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 |  Part 9 …+
Genre: Angst
tags/cw: angst, babydaddy!gojo, babymomma!reader, motherhood, insecurities, arguments
word count: 6.7k
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But sometimes, the best isn’t what our heart wants; the perfect isn’t what our heart seeks.
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“Did you find it?” Before Satoru could even answer, you came jogging in. Your gaze shifted between him and Toji, curious as you noticed the awkward silence that took over when you approached. Or…has it been there before you came? “What is it?” You asked, puzzled. Walking inside, your eyes met Satoru’s. He shook his head, giving a small smile before answering.
“Nothing. Toji was just saying that we should check Yui’s things to make sure we didn’t forget anything else.” You could see his Adam's apple bob up and down, eyes half blinking. “Well yeah, I did. Her extra shirt was still on the hanger. I ironed it earlier.” You walked past him, smiling at Toji before you jogged upstairs, making the two men relax.
“Y-yeah, of course. I could free my schedule, just tell me the details.” Satoru’s voice was much lower; quieter when he was sure that you were out of earshot. Toji nodded, blinking as he took a deep breath. “I’m glad you didn’t tell her.” Satoru doesn’t know why he hid it from you, but he felt like it would only worry you. 
But could he really not tell you about it? He doesn’t want to lie to you.
“You know, it could only worry her; she probably doesn’t even trust us in the same room together.” He added as if sensing Satoru’s doubts. He’s got a point, but still, Satoru wants your relationship to be transparent. Yes, he still hasn’t told you about what happened with Naomi and his mother but that’s a different case.
“Just send me when and where.” Satoru took a deep breath, pulling out a calling card before quickly handing it to Toji as he kept an eye on the hallway to make sure you didn’t see any of it. “Though, she probably won’t be happy about not being informed of this-” Footsteps can be heard as you appear with the clothing item in your hand.
“Why didn’t you go to Yui? Let’s go.” You gave Toji a quick kiss and goodbye before walking out the door, looking back at him just to make sure that he was already after you. And he is, but not without glancing at Toji who only nodded at him. “I was waiting for you, I could see the car from there.” He explained, opening the car door for you.
“Yaaaay Mama! Dada!” The little girl put her hands up, opening and closing her chubby fingers, “Nummy!” She squealed louder as Satoru wiggled the pacifier in his hands, legs kicking as she desperately tried to grab it. “What’s my name?” He tried to keep the object away from her.
“Toru! Dada Toru!” She pushed on her chair, trying to move closer to her dad. Satoru laughed, letting her take the pacifier in her small hands. “Here’s your Nummy.” He cooed before putting on his seatbelt, ready to drive. You looked at him through the rearview mirror, meeting his gaze for a split second before you looked away.
“What is it?” He asked you, raising his brows as he drove. You shook your head, “Nothing, I was just…I was wondering if you and Toji get along well now.” You didn’t really want to ask this to Toji because he still gets grumpy at the mere mention of Satoru’s name in your conversations, which can’t be helped since they’re almost always about Yui.
“I think…” He let out a small laugh at the end of his short answer.  For a second, he thought about telling you of his conversation with Toji but— ‘It could only worry her.’ His words reverberated in his head, making him bite his lip, waiting for your reaction. “Okay. It’ll get better, I guess.” You let out a large breath, lightly slapping your thighs with your hands.
“I’ll… I’m really trying to be less annoying to him. I know that it’s uncomfortable for the both of you.” He was trying to find the right words to assure you. He doesn’t want you to think that he’s threatening your new relationship. Your new happiness.
“And that he probably doesn’t even want you around me even for a minute and that’s why I was saying that we should lessen—” You turned to look at him, making him pause as he quickly glanced at you. He was worried that he may have said something wrong or hurtful to you. That’s the last thing he wants.
“Satoru.” You licked your lips, feeling bad that he was probably feeling the same way you did when he was still with Naomi. Probably much worse because he’s also regretting so many things at the same time. “We don’t have to do that. We do it for Yui, I could talk about it with Toji. I will.” You start to look back on how your ‘talks’ with him went.
But if it’s for Yui, you’re determined to make him understand and make all of this work.
“We can’t give Yui the family she deserves.” The words tasted bitter on your tongue as you leaned your elbow on the car window, massaging your temple. “But I don’t want her to feel that.” Thinking about the time scares you; how fast it goes, how quickly it changes. You fear that you’ll wake up one day and you won’t have answers to her questions.
“Hey…” You felt a hand on yours, noticing the car stop. You turned your head at Satoru, only noticing how blurry your vision has gotten. “You’re already doing so many things for her. She won’t feel that. That’s why I’m still here. You don’t have to shoulder this alone even if we’re not with each other.”
In Satoru’s head, he doesn’t like that you’re not with each other. But if that’s what heals you from everything he’s put you through, then so be it. But that doesn’t mean that he won’t be there for you; only heaven knows how much he wants to give you everything if only you allow it. 
But he’s not that lucky anymore.
It took you a minute to snatch your hand away, probably just needing the warmth that it provided you in that vulnerable time, but you still did. “Sorry,” He murmured as you turned away, wiping under your eyes quickly. “Did you have breakfast? I’ll get us something.” He cleared his throat, thinking about how Toji probably cooked breakfast for you.
“I’ll just have coffee–“ You sat up straight, getting cut off by your baby as she struggled to get out of her seat. “Mama! Ma!” She whined, kicking her feet as she reached up to you and pointing outside. “Do you want something, Miss?” Turning her attention to Satoru. “She wants to go inside.” You spoke, removing your seatbelt.
“Alright, come on.” You stepped out of the car to get her, letting Satoru take her small bag. She squealed at the drawing of the cartoon on the wall, making you kiss her cheek. “That’s why she wanted to go inside.” Satoru laughed, letting you walk in first. Greeted by the employee as you scanned their menu, your daughter started pointing.
“Such a cute baby,” An old woman beside you said, “Looks very much like the Dad.” She laughed, making Satoru pat the little girl’s head, proud. “Thank you, Ma’am. She’s a mini of him.” You joked, allowing the old lady to play with your child as you conversed with the employee.
For some reason, the interaction made you feel warm. It’s been a while since you felt like this when going out with them. You used to avoid these situations with him due to how things were, but lately, your guard’s been down around him. Maybe it’s because you can see with your own eyes how much he changed. 
If only he was like this before, would things have been better?
“How old is she?” The old woman’s voice sounded far, drowned by your thoughts. “She’s 2, ma’am.” You could feel Satoru’s hand on your shoulder, snapping you out of your trance. Your eyes met his, overflowing with concern as he tried to keep a conversation with the woman until she left.
“You ok?” He spoke, adjusting Yui on the baby seat. “You zoned out earlier.” He made sure to pull the chair for you before going to his. Shaking your head, you gave a small smile, “It’s nothing, just trying to recall if I packed everything she needs.” It wasn’t convincing, but Satoru felt like he’d be meddling too much if he asked further.
Maybe he really should not add up to the things you’re worrying about.
———————————————————
“What is it about?” Satoru’s fingers tapped on his jeans, nervous as to what his baby mama's boyfriend was about to ask him. He was worried that it’d have something to do with the time he spent around you. Satoru isn’t sure if it’s possible to reduce that since you have a daughter.
“You know, to be honest, I just want to know how you see things.” Toji started, putting down his mug. “I know what happened between you and Y/N before I came along but I want to know what you were planning to do if I didn’t appear.” Satoru was confused as to why he was asking all of it but his brain started to think back to it, nonetheless.
At that time, he was thinking about marrying Naomi. He saw it as an assurance that he was doing so much better; convinced that she was truly the one for him. Spending a year with her, he was sure that she was the better person for him. What with his daughter calling her mom, he thought that maybe it could put an end to most of his problems with you.
Recalling all of this just made him realize how much worse things could’ve been.
Seeing the pain in your eyes the moment those hurtful words came out of his mouth set all of these plans on fire. You looked shattered; like the tiniest glimmer of hope in your eyes died along with your aching heart, hearing that the man you love regrets everything he had with you. 
It almost felt like stepping so abruptly on the brakes that he hit his head from the impact. When you crumbled in front of him that day, you were bare to Satoru. All the feelings, all the pain that you held in your heart were presented before him.
Satoru remembered thinking about why you were like that with him, why you acted indifferent. 'She has always loved me this much. She was just hurt.' And it broke him too. A couple of days after that, he tried. He tried to tell himself that it was just the emotions, that it was just the guilt eating him up and that’s why he couldn’t see anything but you. 
But he caught himself thinking about how he’d like to put you back together again piece by piece if he was given a chance.
He didn’t think too much of it; just a poor interpretation of his feelings towards your pain. He thought about his loving girlfriend, he reminded himself that there was someone who willingly put up with him when he was a mess. That’s how it always went. That’s how he pushed the thoughts of you away. With her, her words, her touch, her body.
But it’s never enough when he thinks about how you probably cry yourself to sleep at night, thinking about why you weren’t enough to get the same treatment that he was giving her. That’s when his plans started to falter; like a building threatening to crumble, dust began to shower down on them.
The day he went to your house, he found himself fixing his collar, and his hair, thinking about the words to say to you. And if you’re not there, he thought of ways to get to you. But there Toji stood. With a smug look on his face and marks all over his neck that scream “I just fucked the girl you dreamt about last night.” 
That day he wanted to ask him directly what the fuck he think he’s doing, but that wouldn’t seem right, knowing that Satoru’s nothing but a baby daddy to you. That day was a deja vu. All the events that happened between the two of you are being shown to him, and it seems like he’s feeling the pain threefold.
After that, Satoru tried. He tried to tell himself that he just got upset because of how disrespectful Toji was acting. He just couldn’t stand that he acted as if he owned everything in that place, even flexing the hickeys you gave him the other night.
He thought that was the worst he could see that day but for some reason, seeing you in that shirt with marks on your collarbones triggered something in him. A question he didn’t see coming popped up in his brain and along with it was the guilt that he felt for his girlfriend: 
Am I too late?
The next thing he knew he was getting up and getting ready for when you pick Yui up from his place. He caught himself pulling at his clothes and pushing his hair back as he waited for you to open your door; like a teenage boy waiting for his crush. He denied himself that he wanted to look good; to look better for you.
Until it all sank in; until he couldn’t handle it any longer. Each time he sees you with Toji, doing things that you should be doing with him, he gets pushed a bit more. He was already getting pulled back towards you again even before he came along but now that he’s beside you, it felt like Satoru’s spiraling back to you at the speed of light.
Then, that night happened. When all the bands that he used to stop himself snapped.
“I would appreciate it if we could be honest with each other. This could greatly affect the decisions I’m about to make.” Toji’s serious voice interrupted Satoru’s memories. He blinked, clearing his vision of him. He stared at the cup with a grim expression, which made Satoru realize the weight of the conversation.
This is not just a conversation, Satoru thought, licking his lips before speaking again.
“I’d…Back then, I was denying what I wanted. I…I was trying to get her back. Not just to make up for all that I said and done.” He rubbed his palms on his pants, seeing Toji lean back on his office chair. “I had a girlfriend, then. Naomi. I didn’t really want to admit to myself that my heart wants to get back with Y/N when I’m with someone so good to me.” He shook his head.
Satoru’s disappointment and anger about what happened between him and Naomi felt like a ton on his chest. She was a good woman to him and it’s true, but thinking about how everything aged; he can’t even bear the thought of her and his memories with her. It’s just sad that it had to end that way.
He can’t help but to blame himself for the actions that she took. He could’ve written a better ending for them.
Satoru heard Toji sigh as he straightened his legs under his table, crossing his arms as he nodded for Satoru to continue. “Then, you appeared. And I don’t know. I don’t even know how it happened but everything that I was feeling about her was rushing into me faster than it used to and maybe…” Satoru panted, shrugging as he gestured with his hands.
He couldn’t believe that he was really talking about this to his baby momma's boyfriend. “It just got me desperate. I told myself I was too slow and I lost my chance and I really did but…” He looked at Toji, wanting to convey his sincerity. “I just want her to be happy. I feel like all I did was ruin things for her. I don’t want to ruin what she has with you.”
It was a tough thing to say for Satoru. The words felt like shards of glass in his heart. It’s not what he wants but if it’s what he must do then he’ll do it. Toji’s silence got him wondering if he was pissed or relieved that Satoru was aware that he was not getting you back as long as he was there. But in Toji’s mind, that’s not the case.
“So you’re saying that you wanted to get her back even before she got with me?” He blinked slowly, trying to comprehend Satoru’s words. “I thought you only started to want her back because you don’t want to see her with someone else.” He didn’t bother filtering the words. He can’t think of a better way to put this.
“It’s always her. Even if I end up with someone else, I need her to know that I had always wanted it to be her.” 
Toji didn’t think that Satoru would be this transparent to him about his feelings towards you. There was an eerie look in his eyes as he stared at the open window, a defeated look plastered on his face. 
“If I didn’t enter the story, would you still be doing all of this for her now?” Satoru’s eyes were back at him, nodding as he sat straight. “Yes. It would probably take longer than it did but I’m sure that I was bound to fall back into her at some point.” Toji’s brows furrowed, trying to think of what the situation would be like if it were like that.
“Weren’t you planning to marry Naomi?” Satoru chuckled bitterly, considering it another poor and rash decision that he made. “I was. Before I fought with Y/N.” Before he found that small light of hope in your eyes. Before he realized that not all of it was lost.
Toji laughed, rubbing his face with his palm as everything that had been going on sank in. He’s talking with his girlfriend’s ex. And he’s telling him all of this. Like it’s the most natural thing to do. He sighed, swallowing as he bit his lip, feeling himself getting agitated by the second. 
“I know I said I’d appreciate honesty, but I didn’t think you’d actually say all that to my face.” He chuckled bitterly, recalling every sentiment he just said about you. “I’m her boyfriend. Her new man.” His chest heaved, blinking to allow himself to calm down. He’s the one who asked for this to happen, so why’s he the one getting pissed now?
“What do you want me to say?” Satoru’s voice was calm, looking away from Toji’s piercing glare. “You should’ve just told me to fuck off and stay away, though the latter one’s not possible because Y/N and I have a child.” Satoru sat up straight, as if getting ready to be kicked out. Toji’s jaw tightened visibly at the words.
Not because they’re insulting but because they’re right.
That’s what he wanted to do. He thought that if he couldn’t get you away from Satoru then maybe Satoru could just stay away from you. But obviously, it isn’t just some responsibility for him. Satoru isn’t the type of guy to just send money for his child. He’s not the type of guy to be just happy that his child knows he exists somewhere.
He wants to be present; to be there for Yui and watch her grow. He wants to be with her but of course, your circumstances wouldn’t allow that. Maybe this isn’t as easy as Toji thought it’d be and that’s what makes him mad. 
“Toji, I know we’re not on the best of terms with each other, but what are you trying to get with this?” Toji didn’t like how he asked it. It made him sound like a villain and that’s the last thing he wants. 
Is he getting so desperate that he allows himself to seem like one? “I agreed to this without knowing what you’re planning to do, I’m just here to be honest to you. Really.” Satoru wanted to ease the tension between the two of them for your sake. 
He knows that you’re still very uncomfortable with the two of them being around each other and that you’re also thinking about how to make it better. He thought that this “conversation” would help.
“Do you really love her? Or did you just learn to love her for your child?” Toji gave his all to sound composed, scratching the edges of his thumb with his index finger. “I don’t remember telling myself that I have to love her. I just know that I love her.” Toji could hear his teeth grind against one another; his frustration starting to surface.
“Look, if you want to hear from me that I am not trying to take Y/N away from you then, I’ll just say that.” Toji remained silent, forgetting what this meeting is supposed to be and how it’s supposed to go. He’s bothered by this ever since he fought with you, but he cannot let that cloud his mind of what he would deem to be right. 
And obviously, that’s not what’s happening right now.
“But you can’t tell me not to love her when even I myself can’t control that.” You weren’t lying when you said that this man changed a lot. It felt like this is the most mature Toji’s ever heard him talk.
 “To feel that is one thing but to act upon it is another and I don’t plan on doing that.” Satoru wondered if you’ve been arguing about this with him, probably why he’s like this. He remembered your problem with him constantly mentioning his wife in whatever you do but after that, you never really told him anything about it anymore.
He didn’t try to pry even when it felt like your mind was always somewhere else because he didn't want to seem like he’s taking advantage of the situation.
“Well, it’s good that I don’t have to remind you.” Toji murmured, tilting his head as he furrowed his brows. Looking away, he pulled at his collar with his finger. The man in front of him looks nothing like a threat. Yet, he can’t find it in him to let it go.
Probably because deep down, he knows that this is not a one sided problem.
“I won’t ask you to stay away from Yui. I’m a father too. I just needed to hear this all from you, Satoru.” He opened a drawer, taking out a packet of cigarettes before putting one between his lips. The fire from the lighter lit up a portion of his face, inhaling only to let out smoke from one side of his mouth. “Why?” Satoru asked, leaning back.
“I don’t know. So, I could do better I guess?” Toji chuckled, making the other man’s brow bump with each other; not with anger but with an irritating confusion.Just as he was about to ask, Toji answered his question. “We didn’t fight. There’s just nothing left to do about it. Guess we gotta put extra effort.” 
With that he stood up, signaling that he’s already over this conversation. And Satoru sat there, still in the dark with his intention. Does he have some kind of mic here that recorded what he just said? Satoru doesn’t care. 
What he said was the truth, and it would be too funny to suspect Toji of some kind of evil plan when he’s literally the one who got heated up.
“I hope to work with you better, Satoru. After all, we love the same woman.” With that, he walked to the door to leave but not before Satoru could say a word. “Just take care of her for me. I’m sure she wants it from you.” It came out softer than he intended to. He looked down at his hands as they played with one another; defeated.
He didn’t hear a sigh from Toji. The sound of the door closing was the only signal that he already left. Clicking his tongue, Satoru stood up before running his fingers through his hair. He wonders if it’d be right to ask you about your situation with Toji. He wonders if you also want him to adjust. 
He wonders if he’s just a nuisance in your life right now. Like how he made you feel before. 
————————————————
“She should start when she’s like four. Or five.” Toji put Yui’s bag down on the couch as they ran around him. The kids were still not tired enough to calm down after a whole day of swimming. Their cheeks are all red from the sun and you mentally noted to put aloe gel on her face before bed.
“Megumi will start next year?” You asked him, hearing a hum as his gaze followed the two kids who ran to your daughter’s room. “‘Gumi we’ll be going in a few, don’t fall asleep!” Toji called to the little boy who only stared at him from a distance before turning away. You felt a pair of hands pull you as Toji sat you on his lap.
“Did you have your own fun too?” He teased, squeezing your thigh as he kissed your cheek. Your mind went back to the other day. It has been a while since the two of you did it due to busy schedules. You admit that you felt like you and Toji are still being extra careful with a few topics but this past few days was a breather. 
“Mhm, definitely did.” You whispered to his lips, feeling his teeth bite your bottom one as he kissed you. You don’t know when it started but things started to feel a bit different between you and Toji and you don’t know if it’s because he’s starting to drop his worries for you and Satoru or if it’s because he’s just tired of thinking about it.
You were gonna talk to him regarding that but this weekend kind of assured you that it’s all going fine. As for you, you’re trying your best to adjust. You told yourself a thousand times that you had to think about Toji too and not just yourself but for some reason, you still find yourself questioning how you should do some things. 
That’s not a good sign but you thought that maybe you could just take one step at a time. Toji’s making adjustments for you and you can’t just let him do all that work. The only thing you’re fearing is if it’s gonna burn out the two of you sooner or later.
It’s not that your relationship with him is not sturdy, but it’s still young. There are still so many things that the two of you might go through. You’re afraid that all of these are just taking a toll on both of you and one blow from a different direction might just take you down immediately if it ever lands.
Toji stayed for about half an hour before calling Megumi who definitely fell asleep on Yui’s bed. Meanwhile, your little girl was sitting beside her big bear, whining about the burns on her face, begging you to call her Dada. 
“We’ll just put medicine on it, okay?” She stomped her little legs, pulling at your shirt to pick her up. “It’s because you won’t let me put sunscreen on your face properly earlier.” You clicked your tongue, letting her sob on your shoulder. “Dada…” She wiggled in your arms, a small hand holding her cheek.
“Just give Satoru a call. Or get him to come over. She probably misses him.” Toji picked his son up. The latter option shocked you a bit because you didn’t expect him to actually suggest the man he’s so uncomfortable with to come over and be around you. Even if it’s not for you, you still didn’t see it coming out of his mouth, especially after all the fights you had.
“They’ll meet in a day, anyway so it’s—” You started but he cut you off by talking to Yui. “Dada will come over, it’s okay. Stop crying.” The toddler’s cries softened to sniffles as she looked up at him. His hand patted her head, before turning to you to give you a kiss on the forehead. “She needs him right now. You know how kids are.” 
The gesture made you feel a bit sad. You’re aware that this is not about the two of you but still, you know how he is when it comes to Satoru being with you. “You shouldn’t hold back if that’s what Yui needs.” You shouldn’t hold back if that’s what you need. He wanted to tell you that as well.
He remembered asking you casually about how you were with Satoru. Of course, you found it weird and got worried. You kept saying things to comfort him to which he quickly reassured you that it wasn’t like that. 
“Of course, I did.” You told him, swirling the liquid inside the sippy cup. You wouldn’t look up at him the whole time. You placed it beside the other cup before moving to sit beside him. “We had a rough time, but it wasn’t always like that.” There was a hint of nostalgia in your voice; a mix of melancholia and fondness for the lost time.
“Why did it become like that?” He leaned on his elbow, fixing the ornaments in front of him. “Because of the rush, I guess. Bad timing.” You shrugged, drumming your fingers on the marble counter. “We just became parents. We didn’t have time to become lovers.” You chuckled half-heartedly.
“But I know I did.” So, Satoru wasn’t lying when he said you were in love. “Have you ever wondered if… if it’s just because of the responsibility that you share?” He prodded further, feeling like he was having the watered-down version of the conversation that he had with Satoru. Something he apologized to him for 2 weeks later.
“Probably at first. All of it is just for Yui. But at some point, I just found myself looking forward to days with him.” You sighed, staring blankly as you probably tried to recall more memories. You quickly looked at Toji, realizing the words that came out of your mouth. It’s not supposed to be like that. You’re not supposed to speak like that.
“Did you ever—” He began but you’re quick to cut him off, getting more and more worried about his behavior. You’ve been having open talks with each other, deciding that it might help with the crack in your relationship with him but this still makes you feel anxious. Because what if you hurt him again? What if something you say makes it worse?
“Are you alright? You keep asking unusual things.” You jokingly put your hand on his forehead, making him grab your wrist as he pulled you to him. “Hey, I was just curious. I want to do better.” He kissed the back of your neck. It’s true that he wants to do better for you. Hell, he wants to be the best for you.
But sometimes, the best isn’t what our heart wants; the perfect isn’t what our heart seeks.
“Alright, I’ll try to contact him. I doubt he’d be here, though. It’s a work day, I don’t really want to bother him.” You squeezed his hand reassuringly before walking with him to the door. Megumi’s small arms were wrapped around his neck as he bid you goodbye for the day. 
You wanted to ask him if it’s really okay with him but you reminded yourself that if it’s for Yui, it doesn’t matter if it’s not okay with anyone. “Text me when you get home.” You told him after he put Megumi in his seat. “Yeah, love you.” He kissed your lips once more before getting in his car and driving away.
You watched his car disappear, rubbing your baby’s back as she started to whine again. “Alright, we’ll call him.” You walked back inside, spotting your phone on the coffee table. You kissed Yui’s cheek as you dialed Satoru’s number. It rang twice before you heard his voice from the other line.
“Hey, everything okay?” You ignored the way your heart swelled at how alert he was to your calls. You figured that he’s probably working, "Dada!" Yui called to him, kicking her little feet and making you grab them. You put the phone on speaker "What's wrong, love?" Satoru's voice was full of worry because of how his daughter cried.
"She got sunburnt. She was swimming with Megumi earlier and now it's starting to sting." You pushed her hair back as she tried to take the phone from you. "Are you busy? She keeps asking for you. I didn't want to bother you but—" Without letting you finish your sentence, you could hear the chair scrape the floor. "Don't think like that. I'm never too busy for Yui." 
"Would it be… Is it ok if I come over? I'll get ointment on the way." You could already hear the car keys and you pictured him walking out of his door and to his car. "Yeah, it's fine. Toji actually suggested that because Yui won't stop crying. Thank you." A small silence can be heard from the other end.
"I'll be there in a few, text me if you need anything else." After that, he lets you hang up the phone, waiting patiently for you say something. "Dada will be there. Stop crying now, you weren't crying earlier." You checked her face, feeling bad that she has to pay for having fun. But you think the blush that it left on her cheeks are cute.
After a little while, a knock on the door pulled you away from your phone. Even though, you already know that it's Satoru, you still peeped through the hole just to make sure. The night his mom stormed in your house and threatened fo take your child away was still vivid. You don't want Yui to see something like that again. 
"Da!" She immediately cried when she saw him, reaching for her father to take her. "Hey, why? Where's your ouchie?" You saw a couple of bags in his hand as he took the crying child. "I brought you guys something, I thought you might not have had your dinner yet." He sounded shy, taking the smallest bag.
“Oh, thank you. You should eat with us, sorry for calling so abruptly. She’s being fussy.” You smiled at him, not missing the fond sigh that escaped his lips. “It’s nothing, it’s a win-win situation.” He jokes, tickling the little girl’s belly which caused her to erupt into laughter. 
“Let’s put this cream on your face so it doesn’t hurt, alright?” You watched the two of them sit on your couch and all of a sudden, it became the highlight of your day. How he removed his shoes when she asked him to lay down, how he listens to her almost incomprehensible rants, how he gently applied the ointment on her cheeks, producing the most beautiful giggles.
It almost felt like a normal family, resting after a long day of staying out. With her favorite show playing, you watched her look up at her father just to make sure he’s watching the same thing. And he’d go and nod, talking to her like it’s the most serious thing in the world.
“You should eat with us.” You found yourself saying as you wiped your hand. You reminded yourself to text your boyfriend as you turned away, feeling wrong for how you feel but how can you not feel that way when the scene you used to dream of just came alive in front of you? 
Maybe you’re just tired. Maybe you just wanted the comfort of your bed. Maybe you just want to not think about it, maybe it’s better to ignore these feelings because there are other things you should be feeling right now. Like wanting to see Toji and be with him. You shook your head, setting up Yui’s table. 
And there he comes, with your daughter in his arms, wearing one of the house slippers you left under the couch. “Can I borrow these?” He chuckled and you could feel the stretch on your cheeks from how small they look on him and suddenly, it’s just the three of you again. Eating under the warm kitchen light, talking about your daughter.
Like how you always wanted it to be.
——————————————————
“Just take care of her for me. I’m sure she wants it from you.”
Toji pursed his lips as Satoru's words reverberated in his head. He knows nothing, he thought, glancing at you from the mirror. You were busy checking Yui's bag, completely unaware of the thoughts of the man in front of you. Toji has been selfish before. But his head was clear enough to finally judge things with deep consideration to the external factors.
Any man or woman wants nothing but to work things out for their family. But sometimes it just gets too much for them. But for some, they just need time. And he doesn't know how to feel when he thinks about how you and Satoru probably just needed time to fix yourselves as individuals for the relationship to work.
Even though Megumi already understands that his mom will never be home. There are still instances where he would ask Toji about her and by that, he could tell that his son's wishing for her. Whenever you'd do something for him, he would say "Like mom?" and he don't want you to know that not even the smile on your face could ease the searing ache in his chest.
“What do you think about getting back together with Satoru?” The question already escaped his lips before he could even think. Your eyes snapped at Toji, looking at him like he just said the most obnoxious thing. You walked to him, stopping his hands to do his tie yourself. 
“Why are you suddenly asking about that now?” You counted back to the first time he was talking about you and Satoru.“Nothing. I mean, he mentioned that his mother’s never around him anymore. Isn’t she like the bane of your relationship with Satoru?” He peered down at you, curious as to how you’d react.
Toji didn’t mean to ask it so abruptly, but he knows that he has to talk about it sooner or later. He knows that the both of you are trying and your relationship shouldn’t be this hard if only adjusting comes so naturally. 
He knows that you put in a lot of effort just so he wouldn’t feel insecure and overthink. He also knows that sometimes it just shows, you’re probably just denying that to yourself. He’s also too aware of how the both of you would tread carefully around the topic of his wife. 
“I don’t want you to feel like you can’t miss her or talk about the things she does.” You told him that once but still, Toji can’t help but feel bad when those days come and he knows that he’s not giving his full attention and mind to you.
“I’m literally in a relationship with you, stop asking if I—” You tried to chuckled it off, brushing the palm of your hands on his chest to straighten the fabric but Toji caught them. “What if this isn’t working?” He sighed, squeezing your hand as if it will lessen the weight of his words.
You don’t know if you’re hurt that he probably wants to end it or if you’re hurt that there’s a hint of truth behind his words. “What are you saying?” As if suddenly coming back down to reality, Toji shook his head and pulled you close. “I think I woke up too early, come here. Sorry about that.”  He kissed your forehead but that didn’t take away your worried face.
“Toji you can’t just say that and expect me not to overthink.” You don’t know if you’ve prepared yourself enough for this possibility. It would hurt you if you’ll lose such a good man in your life. “I’m…I don’t know if I still feel comfortable, or if I’m just getting used to it Y/N. I know you try, you do it so well, baby but,” He took a deep breath, pausing.
“I don’t think I can continue like this. I don’t think we should continue like this.” 
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cleolinda · 7 months
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The Scariest Movie I Ever Saw in a Theater: The Ring
I'll tell you up front that the story I'm going to tell you is about "The Ring (2002)," in the sense that it is about The Ring in the year 2002.
See, I don't know what The Scariest Movie Ever is. A quick google says that the consensus is The Exorcist (I haven't seen it, because I never felt like scheduling a day to freak myself the entire fuck out). But horror is specific, and not just to a person, but to a time and place, even. When I saw The Shining as a teenager in a well-lit living room with other people, I didn't even really flinch, but I bet it would play very differently to me now. I don’t think The Ring is at the top of anyone’s list, but twenty years ago, I had a personal interest in it—at the time, I was running a dinky little Geocities site devoted to movie news. Links curated and compiled from all the other, bigger sites I followed—basically, it was the linkspam format I have used on multiple platforms, including here on Sundays. And so, as someone who followed theatrical releases pretty closely for two or three years, I saw the trailer for The Ring, and I immediately knew it was going to be huge.
To locate you in time, this was just after three self-satirizing Scream movies and the Overcomplicated Serial Killer films of the '90s. The Ring was something completely different: chill aqua-blue color grading a good 5-6 years before Twilight; a mournful Hans Zimmer score; no jokes, no quips; and a slow, inexorable sense of doom. Grief, even, given that the movie begins with the death of the main character's niece. What immediately struck me about the first trailer was 1) the melancholy of it, and 2) how much it doesn't explain. Onscreen, you get the title cards,
THERE IS A VIDEOTAPE IF YOU WATCH IT SEVEN DAYS LATER YOU DIE
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Concise! Understandable! A woman (Naomi Watts) is freaking out upon discovering that her young son has just watched it! Admirable job setting up the premise and the stakes of this entire movie in thirty seconds flat, without even any dialogue. That's all you need to know, and thus, the remaining minute of the trailer can do whatever it wants, and what it wants to do is be fucking weird. Echoing voices, TV static, a closeup of a horse's eye, ladders, a girl with dark hair, people reacting to things we don't see, drippy doorknobs, rain. Characters don't give us the whole plot in convenient soundbites of dialogue (like they do in a later trailer); we just hear lines, overlapping, murmured out of context—
did you see it in your head? she talks to you... leading you somewhere... showing you the horses... you saw it. did you see it in your head? she shows me things. Everyone suffers.
That you saw it has lived in my head ever since, and not once have I charged it rent. But the "best" part is Naomi Watts screaming at the end, because you don't hear her voice; you only hear this heartless telephonic beeeeeeep. It's 2002 and I'm watching this trailer, thinking, I have no idea what the fuck I just saw. This is going to be huge.
And it was, to the tune of $249 million on a $48M budget.
At risk of recapping what you might already know, Ringu, aka Ring, is a media franchise that spiraled out from a trio of Koji Suzuki novels into Hideo Nakata's film Ringu (1998), a landmark of Japanese horror, plus several other movies, some TV series, many comics, and even a couple of video games. The overarching story is about a murdered girl/vengeful ghost named Sadako Yamamura whose rage and pain have created a cursed video tape, you watch it and you die unless you pass the tape around like a virus, seven daaaaays, etc.
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The "ring" in question is the rim of a well. Keep that well in mind.
The movie I saw is the U.S. remake, which itself had two sequels. (The iconic Sadako is now named Samara Morgan. Keep her in mind, too.) Director Gore Verbinski moved from The Ring to Pirates of the the Caribbean (!), and so Hideo Nakata himself would direct The Ring Two. I... honestly have only seen the first one. And I was right, it was huge, and it kicked off the American J-Horror Remake genre, for better or worse. But what gets forgotten about The Ring is its marketing campaign, which I followed pretty closely for my doofy little news site.
It was inspired.
The story of The Ring is partly the story of the sea change in the media landscape—how we watch movies. And the story of its marketing is a picture of the very last years before social media changed the wilderness of the internet into something that feels so big, like a billion people could see anything we say, and yet so small—only a tame handful of places to say it, owned by three or four companies, and corraled by algorithms.
Back around 1997-1998 or so, I worked at a video store (Movie Gallery, where the hits were there then, guaranteed) for about a year and a half. By the time I left, we had started adding DVDs to the VHS tapes on the shelves, but we hadn't replaced the entire stock. Video stores might have transitioned fully to DVD by 2002, I'm not sure, but people still commonly had both VCRs and DVD players in their homes. And I remember that The Ring was sold in both formats when it eventually hit home video. Which is to say—you know the analog horror genre today? Marble Hornets, Local 58, The Mandela Catalogue?
Analog horror is commonly characterized by low-fidelity graphics, cryptic messages, and visual styles reminiscent of late 20th-century television and analog recordings. This is done to match the setting, as analog horror works are typically set between the 1960s and 1990s. The name "analog horror" comes from the genre's aesthetic incorporation of elements related to analog electronics, such as analog television and VHS, the latter being an analog method of recording video.
Okay, but this is just what home media was like, and 2002 was at the very tail end of that—boxy black VHS tapes that degraded with time and reuse were just how we lived. At the same time, I'd been using CDs for music since about 1991, and all our software installs came on CD-ROM discs; a "mixtape" by that time had shifted to mean a rewriteable CD rather than a cassette tape. In college, I—well, I'll plead the Fifth as to whether I downloaded mp3s via Napster, but I was also taping Mystery Science Theater 3000 on VHS over the weekends. It was Every Format Everywhere, All At Once, and we kept half a dozen kinds of players around for them. Here in 2023, we stream and download everything invisibly, unless we choose to engage in format nostalgia. (I've already run into the problem of Apple Music deleting songs I really liked, due to this or that licensing issue, because I was really only renting them.) The year The Ring hit theaters was the edge of a last shimmering gasp of physical media where iTunes had only come into being the year before, and iridescent discs were still mostly what we used, but cassettes, both video and audio, were still viable. And so, people did not think it was terribly weird when they started finding unlabeled VHS tapes on their windshields.
Movieweb, quoting TikTok user astro_nina:
"Their marketing strategy was essentially 'let's get this tape viewed by as many people as possible without these people being aware of what this is, sort of raising intrigue," she says. One way they achieved this was by airing the tape, which allegedly marks its viewers for death within seven days, as a commercial with no context. The video would air between late-night programming "with no words, no mention of a movie, for like a month...so people would run into it and it would just go on to the next thing, and people would be like, 'what the f--k is this?'"
I remember seeing the Cursed Video as an unexplained ad at least twice, by the way. That TikTok also indicates that DreamWorks straight-up sent copies of the tape to Hot Topic stores, as well as planting them under actual movie theater seats. While running my movie site, I heard at least one story of someone finding a tape on the sink counter of a restroom at a club. Did the marketing department actually plant tapes in bathrooms—or did a freaked-out recipient leave it there, hoping to dodge the "curse"?
(I haven't embedded the Cursed Video here, by the way—but I could have. If you'd like to see the American take on it, you can watch both the full version and the shorter variant that appeared in the movie itself. A text description of what the fuck you're even looking at is here [content note for both: blood, insects, animal death, body horror, and suicide by falling]. The original version from the Japanese film is shorter, and it's eerie rather than gruesome.)
BUT WAIT, THERE WAS MORE: DreamWorks had something of an alternate-reality campaign going with a handful of in-character websites. This was only a year after Warner Bros. ran the groundbreaking "The Beast" ARG for A.I.: Artificial Intelligence: "Ultimately, fifty websites with a total of about one thousand pages were created for the [A.I.] game." (I lurked in the Cloudmakers Yahoo group.) Marketing for The Ring did not go anywhere that in depth, nor did it need to; it was both a smaller film and a smaller story. I saw at least two “personal” websites (seemingly amateur and a little tacky, like my own), but the one I particularly remember was about someone who owned/trained horses? I'm not sure if it was meant to be the actual Anna Morgan character—Samara's mother—or maybe someone who had noticed that the Morgans' horses were disturbed? I'm not even sure anyone even remembers this but me. Reddit users dug up a few other archived websites, but they're about Sadako, the curse and/or videotape; they aren't as subtle or character-oriented as the site I remember. (Honestly, I wonder if weird shit like "What Scares Me" or "SEVEN DAYS TO LIVE" were made by fans rather than a marketing department, but who knows.)
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[The “About” page from Seven Days to Live on the Internet Archive.]
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[The entirety of An Open Letter on the Internet Archive. “UPDATE” is a now-blank pop-up. I would bet $5 that it was originally a pop-up of the cursed video.]
I need to point out here that Facebook did not exist in 2002. It would not exist for another two years, and Twitter wouldn't exist until 2006. Even MySpace was not a thing until the next year. I didn't start my Livejournal until October of 2003. What we had, for the most part, were independent forums and blogs. We also had Creepy Internet Fiction like "The Dionaea House" and "Ted the Caver"; their use of the blog format, of people out there seemingly living their lives until something fucked up went down, gave the stories the shape of reality. And it helped that these blogs had comment sections, sure—sometimes more story unfolded there—but for the most part, an author could "abandon" a blog, and you'd just find the story there via word of mouth. Like the Ring blogs I remember, it wouldn't seem strange if no one replied to you, whereas today, you'd have to hire a writer to sit on Twitter, or Reddit, or even Tumblr, and interact with people in character. Could you do something like The Ring's mysterious, weird-ass blogs today? Would anyone even notice?
So: It's 2002, my head is full of Alternate Reality and eerie images and you saw it, and I'm hype as hell to go out and see The Ring. I'm perfectly happy to go see movies by myself, so I went in the early afternoon (best time to get a good seat). The movie ended up being a sleeper hit, and the first weekend, the public was still sleeping on it, so there were only 7-8 other people in that theater, grouped in maybe two clusters. I was off in my own little pool of darkness in the upper right quadrant. Functionally, once the lights went down, I was alone.
Despite some middling reviews at the time, The Ring is something of a horror classic nowadays. If you want a scary movie this Spooky Season, check out The Ring. Or don't, because it nearly killed me.
We're at the last, I don't know, third of the movie? And Our Heroine has tracked down the origin of the Cursed Videotape to some creepy mountain motel or whatever. SPOILER, it turns out that it was built over the Cursed Well (everything in this movie is cursed) that Our Villain was thrown into—that's why Sadako/Samara is a vengeful wet murder ghost crawling out of TVs now. While investigating this decrepit hotel room, intrepid journalist Rachel and her, who is it, her ex-husband? her kid's dad, idk, discover the well under the creaky old floorboards. And then, wouldn't you know it,
NAOMI WATTS FALLS INTO THE WELL
NAOMI WATTS FALLS INTO THE FUCKING WELL
THAT'S WHERE SAMARA'S BODY IS
youtube
[The rather slapstick moment when Rachel falls into the well. Does not include what actually happens next.]
I go absolutely rigid in my seat. Naomi Watts is splashing around this dark-ass death swamp of a well and I know, with as much certainty as I have ever known anything in my life, that Samara is about to pop up in all her pasty, waterlogged glory. All the sad creepy dread, all the desperation to figure out what the fuck all that shit on the tape was and stop Samara from killing Rachel's son, all the horrible contorted victim faces, all the alternate reality I’ve been soaking in, it has all come to this. I have to leave the theater. I cannot be having with this. I have to be gone from this place. My legs do not work. I cannot feel them. I am frozen. I want nothing more in this life or any other to get up and leave this cavernous pitch-black room, and I cannot. I start praying for death. I want you to understand that I am not trying to be flippant or humorous. This is genuinely what went through my head. I was too scared to even think, "You know, you could just pray to pass out or for motion to return to your limbs or something." No, I sat there in The Ring thinking, Please for the love of all mercy just let me cease being.
You know that scene in Mulholland Drive (also starring Naomi Watts)? Winkie's diner and the EXCRUCIATING tension? It was a little like that, except I wasn't watching it, I was experiencing it, and Samara was my dirt monster out behind the diner.
Except that the jump scare didn't actually happen. I mean, yes, Rachel finds Samara's body down there, but—I don't remember exactly, please don't make me go watch it again to tell you what actually happens. It's played more sympathetically on Rachel's part, as I recall, and she and her ex get Samara's body out so that she (Samara) can have a proper burial.
And then it turns out that this is not the end of the movie. It turns out that Rachel has Fucked Up.
I think I was relatively okay through the rest of it, although the climax is Samara emerging from a TV in her full glitching swampy glory to scare [SPOILER] to death. I don't recall praying for death twice. There's a point when you're so exhausted from fear chemicals that you're like, yeah, this might as well happen. Bring it, Soggy. I did have a hard time prying myself out of that seat afterwards, though, and my mom says that when I got home, I had the classic thousand-yard stare. How was the movie?
"It was great," I said, and I meant it.
I've seen things that were objectively scarier (I watched much of The Haunting of Hill House from behind a pillow, to be honest), and it's not like I've never experienced fear in real life. But I respect when a movie that can make me feel so intensely, and there's something weirdly precious about the way horror is a safe roller coaster, as it's often been said. So I love telling the story about The Time The Ring Nearly Killed Me—a movie that actually made my body stop working—and I love thinking of how embedded in a specific time and place that movie was for me. The last gasp of VHS when the Cursed Videotape still seemed plausible; the way the internet was still wild and weird and free; where I was in my life, keeping up so avidly with all the movie news, and finding myself in such a little pool of darkness early one afternoon. It's the scariest movie I saw in a theater; that's the alchemy of circumstance.
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lasirenatarot · 11 months
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-I am backkk! Mentioning this again, if traditional gender roles don’t apply to you convert to masculine and feminine energy,thank you.💋-
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What does your person find attractive about you?{kind of a not so mini PAC}
Pick a Naomi Campbell picture:
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Pile 1.
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This PAC was not intended to be $€xu@L, however it will get & the person about whom people who chose pile 1 are thinking of, in my opinion, may have some double standards going on. (Not for all, but for some, this may resonate). This person is probably far from a puretan having in mind all the $€x suggestive cards that fell,but they probably like you to be more modest in front of others while at the same time, in front of them and only them, to be more open with your $€xu@lity and wearing more revealing clothes. They want you to be $£xu@l but to appear more innocent,fragile and inexperienced (as in the sense that you “need”their guidance & protection) at first glance. OR they may like that you are not promiscuous (nothing wrong with it, but it’s just what i am getting) and are very selective about who you sleep with/engage with emotionally and physically. You may have an ethereal/fairy vibe that they like. (Reminds me of Pisces energy).
As for physical attributes they like about you;
Some of you may have naturally curly hair that they like, or if you don’t, they may like you when you’re wearing your hair down & curls in your hair made with an iron or whatever method..
Definitely @$$, that appeared in few of the cards.
Makeup wise, they may like on you Victoria’s secret bombshell makeup for example: glossy lips, gold-ish highlighter, rosy cheeks, highlight in the inner corner of the eyes, overall glowy complexion. I am mentioning this, bc it gives you an angelic look they may be into or like specifically on you.
They probably like your legs as well, especially if you wear garters, lacy socks and high heels or you just happen to have long legs lol.
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Channeled song:
I can’t make this up I played spotify on shuffle ahahhaha
“…in the land of Gods and monsters I was an angel looking to get f#cked hard..”
(Last thing I feel like I need to mention about this pile is that I mentioned the sentence “double standards” because some may not be that ‘pure’ themselves but moral policing you in a way and being possesive&controlling, as I do get that this person is quite dominant which is a masculine trait normally. Ofc that is the unhealthy manifestation of the situation & the shadow side of it all, that may not resonate with a lot and the SP in mind may just have a k*nk to play a protector/savior or whatever..)
Pile 2.
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This pile is very different from the first one lol. This person likes you the way you are. You may be more wild and expressive, may think you are stubborn, a bit hard to handle but they actually like that. They like that you know exactly what you want and you know how to get it, that you are not willing to compromise with yourself. They find attractive in you also the fact that you may be very confident and seductive, also very $€xu@l without having much restraint,shame or insecurities about that or they may like when you appear that way (even if you fake your confidence no one will ever know so who cares..) . You may have Leo energy or an aries rising, as that means that the 5th house of pleasure/flings/fun&expressiveness in your natal chart is in leo. You are honest and have no secrets and they love that. They also like that you’re balanced, you’re not completely chaotic, you know how to behave&when, time and place. They like in you that you’re a bit of a hedonist, you seek to indulge in all pleasures in life & are a free soul. You may have young energy even if you’re not young and that��s also one of the reasons they enjoy your company.
/some of you may have capricorn placements which gives balance to your fiery attitude/
As for physical attributes they like about you;
Your face/ lips more specifically, some of you may have M-shaped lips (no idea why Im getting this) , if you accentuate that they may love this. *example of ppl with such shape lips who do that are Rihanna&Monica Bellucci*
Your gaze. Not the eye color itself, but more like the looks you give them.
Legs. that is shown on several cards, I wish I could also post them for you to get the full picture but tumblr will shadowban me as they have 18+ imagery on them.
Unlike the previous pile, they probably would like you wearing just perfume if I could say it like that😂 no fancy underwear or garters, or whatever.. they find charm in simplicity. They would also prefer a more classic makeup look on you.
Also they like your b0.0bs/breast area (sry thats what I get..)
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Channeled song:
“… baby I'm fist fighting with fire; Just to get close to you; Can we burn something, babe?
And I run for miles just to get a taste; Must be love on the brain; That's got me feeling this way.”
Pile 3.
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Right of the bat, I feel like this person may have been a bit emotionally unavailable due to previous dissapointments in love, up until they met you. They see you as a wish fulfillment, they may idealize you and the relationship, because they haven’t felt like they could be fully open and intimate emotionally with other partners before you. You may be a gentle/fragile (like a flower not like bomb haha) and sensitive person or they see you as such and love that about you. You may have air sign energy which makes you logical and rational, which also can make you teach them how to handle and process their emotions in a healthy way maybe? They appreciate this quality of yours as well. They like that you’re person they can trust with their deepest wounds and darkest secrets.
As for physical attributes they like about you;
They like your facial features. Didn’t get anything specific.
For some reason I think they would like 90s supermodel style makeup on you; nude/brown-ish lips, brown eye shadow, Cindy Crawford pepsi commercial blowdry hairstyle as well (on two of the cards there are women whose hair is messy bc of the wind so it makes sense, see?😂)
Your hair. So many cards pointing to exactly this.
They find black lace to look good on you; dress, underwear, doesn’t matter.. also jewelry, more specifically necklaces and earrings (Im thinking about those with crystals/diamonds,for some reason.)
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Channeled song;
-Google the lyrics, I feel like it may resonate for some of you.-
Decks used: ‘Amor et Psyche’ oracle deck by Georges Barbier and Rachel Paul; ‘Manara’ €rotic tarot deck by Milo Manara/ Lo Scarabeo;
That was all from today’s PAC💋 thank you for reading! Hope it resonated.💞 Don’t forget to follow for more.
- La Sirena. 🌹
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punkpandapatrixk · 6 months
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Full Hunter’s Moon in Taurus ♦︎ Moon Magick Pick A Card
I read around the Internet; it seems this year’s Full Hunter’s Moon in Taurus is a big deal for all people, because it marks the end of a 2-year long cycle of Taurus-Scorpio eclipse. That cycle began in November 2021. So, if you could remember what specific misery started then, this year’s eclipse is the end of that suffering😊BANZAI!🎉Or, for some people, an intense healing journey might’ve started then and this eclipse marks your full-recovery or something along those lines🥰
Aenergetically, I feel that this Hunter’s Moon in Taurus is inviting us to take stock of many elements in our lives that no longer serve us. That’s such a cliché, right? We do this every full moon anyway, but with this powerful eclipse, and it being in the Taurus-Scorpio axis, this releasing of old narratives extends far back into childhood conditioning. And in some cases, childhood traumas.
Taurus is the ruler of the 2nd House of personal autonomy and how we view ourselves in relationship to our immediate, closest environment: the family environment. This sign/house tells us how we perceive our individuality in relation to the grownups immediately near us, and how they perceive us. When elements of life ruled by this sign/house is afflicted, disregarded, ignored, dominated and manipulated, traumas in childhood develop and…
Scorpio as the ruler of the 8th House of traumas can tell you a lot about ways you could pull yourself out of this loop of misery caused by terrible conditioning or bad parenting. Often, for many people, the development of new traumas continues to happen way into adulthood and so, when you carry a lot of pains, you will need to heal yourself over and over again until almost all of those layers of a false concept of your Self are taken down.
This full moon eclipse in the Taurus-Scorpio axis, I feel, brings immense relief from the maelstrom of a healing journey that is often quite world-shattering. I have faith that even now as you’re reading these words, many things in your world—your inner world—are already calming down and the winter season will allow you plentiful of rest, before the spring of your Life begins again next year🌱😜🎍
‘Chill…
You’re going to end up where you’re supposed to be.’
[Masterlist] [Patreon] [Paid Readings]
☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.
Pile 1 – King of Your Own World
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outdated patterns, DISSOLVED – King of Pentacles
I sense you’ve come from a very restrictive background. When you were growing up, parents or teachers were incredibly strict. They placed so much cruel expectations on you without caring for your feelings as a person. For some of you, this debilitating sense of restriction could also have come from religion, tradition, custom, race/ethnicity bullshit, and all such things. You felt like there were so many things you weren’t supposed to do because you belonged to a certain religion or because of your ethnicity or whatever. Meanwhile, for the same reasons, ridiculous expectations on you were abound as well.
You constantly felt like the sky above your head was so low and you couldn’t do anything about it. Naomi Campbell’s quote fits perfectly here: ‘The sky has never been the limit. We are our own limits.’
Recently, you’ve been able to overcome so much of this bullshit patterning from your childhood. I think you’ve been working on this unravelling for a number of years. You are free now. Quite nothing is restricting you anymore; you’ve figured out how the Matrix works. And now, you’re the King of your own Reality. What are you going to entertain and create in this brave new world of your own making? Your North Node sign and house placement will have some hints for you to know what options would make you feel the best about yourself in this incarnation!🥰
authentic self, EMBRACED – 4 of Wands
In spite of all the conditioning you were subject to, you’re essentially a Soul who’s always been rather clear about who you are on a fundamental level. Actually, you knew yourself, you knew what you liked, you knew what you wanted to become. But yeah, those restrictions put around your sky caused you to feel confused a lot. Or that you felt helpless on so many levels. What you wanted, what you knew you could be so good at, and what you were allowed to do… they seemed all to be separate circles.
But now, now that you are your own person, you’re reclaiming those bits and pieces of your authentic self that became dormant as you were trying to survive! They are all coming online one by one. For some of you, I feel old skills/abilities are going to get reactivated and this will point towards what you’re meant to do in this incarnation. For some others, you may suddenly gain insane skills you never knew you were capable of and this might shock you a lot. These are actually skills you’ve polished in past incarnations. They’re coming back to help you ascend into New Earth more easily! This is your time to shine, baby!🌤
life purpose, EXPRESSED – 4 of Cups
Okay, let’s get to the real stuff here. For a lot of you reading this, I sense you may be occasionally dealing with stagnation or a sense of feeling absolutely stuck in the manifestation of your ideal world, ideal reality. There’s this feeling like, even though you know what you’re supposed to do as part of your Life Purpose, you feel like there’s just no way you can build that bridge towards that life purpose at the present moment. Don’t worry, honey, I promise you that you can’t fuck up what’s meant for you.
Many of you, you’re currently in that gestation phase where you’re supposed to gain a lot, A LOT, of spiritual strength before you’re ready to take on the world. Your path may sound unnecessarily tougher than other people, but it’s because you have a higher calling to be of service to your community. Maybe even the world, WHOA. Your experiences have shaped the amazing individual you’ve become, and even now you’re still becoming even more awesome than you could ever imagine in the meantime.
You are where you’re supposed to be. Learn as much as you can, enjoyably. Breathe as deeply as you can, enjoyably. Play your videos games. Watch your favourite series. Aren’t you aware you’re having so much time on your hand now to be building new positive habits, too? All of these seemingly unrelated activities are leading you towards your Life Purpose; embrace everything nice and calm that you have now. It is going to get wild sooner than you realise!🎆
full moon self-care🔻🌒🌓🌔🌕🌖🌗🌘
Access full reading + cards on Patreon🌸
☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.
Pile 2 – Comfortable New World
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outdated patterns, DISSOLVED – 5 of Cups Rx
Not to touch on conspiracy theories, but if there’s a new world order on a microcosmic scale, you’re having it all to yourself XD You are dissolving an old world order that involves mental lethargy and a general sense of spiritual confusion, which I think you’ve needed to deal with for almost your entire Life. I sense, for many of you this was caused by a very traumatic childhood in which you were constantly, systematically let down by the people around you, or your environment in general. It feels like, you were never given what you wanted, what you needed; whatever you asked, if you asked, you would be granted its non-delivery.
I think you had toxic parents? Grandparents? Maybe teachers? Just incredibly venomous adults who actually saw your potential for success, and so, they deliberately attempted to murder your Light from a very young age. At this point of reading, I think you’re healing and transitioning into more peaceful waters by your own conscience. I’m sure you’ve worked really hard to heal yourself, work on your inner demons, defeated negative thought patterns that weren’t even your own, and created new neurological pathways all on your own. You’ve successfully made the unconscious conscious. You have better control over your own emotions, thoughts, choices and conducts now. Congratulations!🎊
authentic self, EMBRACED – 3 of Pentacles Rx
Before this point, you were probably a people-pleaser of sort, right? You thought too much about other people and I think you were conditioned to think that self-love or prioritising yourself is incredibly selfish. That choosing to live Life on your own terms was incredibly selfish! The adults around you were probably the type of parents that would say, young people choosing not to have babies is incredibly selfish! Whereas such adults are choosing so precisely because they don’t want to bring into this miserable world babies that are unloved and unwanted. That’s all gaslighting, you know that, right?
With this energy, I’m seeing you choosing to cultivate solitude for the time being. You’ve finally been able to tap into this consciousness of calm and harmony. You are in rest and recuperation mode for both your mental and spiritual. You are not yet ready to connect with people. Right now, it’s time to build a deeper connection with yourself, perhaps your inner child and all the things that make you feel joyous from the inside. This is also your time to feel more connected to the Planet herself as well as understand your unbreakable bond with the Cosmos itself. If you ask me, I think you’re currently in a really good stage where you’re being led to your best Life as of yet!🌞
life purpose, EXPRESSED – 2 of Pentacles Rx
As of right now, your Spirit Guides and Higher Self are sending you many synchronistic messages that give you a clearer idea as to what your next steps should be. It’s perfectly OK to be casual and relaxed about them though. You are not at all in a rush. Even when you see these YouTube readings that say crap like URGENT MESSAGES FROM THE UNIVERSE, no, you’re not in a rush anywhere. Your new world order is gestating right now and you can be patient with yourself. Those types of titles are just for the algorithm or for grabbing your attention, but in reality, there is no such thing as the Universe or Higher Self or Spirit rushing you towards anything. You can’t fuck up what’s meant for you, trust that.
When you allow the process of your new world of comfort to unfold naturally, in the future, you will always know when to make the right decision for almost every life choice you will be making. You will be guided more by your intuition and so, whatever choice you make will reflect the highest good of you and those you care about. That’s the spiritual lesson you’re learning as of right now and I think it’s such a wonderful stage to be in! Trust that you’re being prepared by your Higher Self to receive so much abundance and joy in the next chapter of your Life. You’ve come so far😊
full moon self-care🔻🌒🌓🌔🌕🌖🌗🌘
Access full reading + cards on Patreon🌸
☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.
Pile 3 – Bittersweet Transition Into the Light
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outdated patterns, DISSOLVED – 6 of Pentacles
In spite of the title, I feel that your transition into the Light is actually a pretty lighthearted one! More like, all the rough times are over, for realz for realz. You’ve been to the depths of hell and returned safely; scathed, yes, but you’re still alive, so you’ve won! For this Pile, I feel like you might’ve been attracted to the other piles, too, and they contain insights about the kind of struggles you’ve had to deal with. But if you feel that this Pile is your main pile, you’ve literally crossed over many bridges and the Light is dawning fast on you! You’re travelling at light speed towards a world of your ideal!
If up until now you’ve been the character who receives help and charity from other people, soon you’ll finally embrace a transcendent version of yourself with which you’ll be the one sharing your riches and knowledge! You are now the enviable main character but without the envy… hopefully XD But those who are actually envious of your transformation or success are not your people, so I hope you know how to protect yourself from the beady eyes of those who will be seeking to harm you in the future if you let them!
authentic self, EMBRACED – 7 of Cups
For the most part, I’m sensing that you didn’t necessarily come from extreme poverty or anything like that. But the manifestation of your dreams has been nothing short of difficult damn near impossible at times. I hope you understand now that this has been your script only because the things that you want to see manifest in this world are so precious, pure and high-vibrational that Earth herself was not ready to assist their manifestations. Do you understand? Often we hear about needing to raise our frequencies so become a vibrational match to our higher desires. But what happens when our desires are SO high-vibrational Earth herself couldn’t contain those dreams? LMAO
So it was that the collective of Mankind needed to collectively raise their frequencies enough for your time to come. It may sound weird to some people but I didn’t make the rules, hon, so just take these words, I promise you it will make sense soon enough XD And with that said, have faith that you will see all that you’ve ever dreamt of manifest in the physical. Never lose your sight on the prize and don’t settle for less; you’re meant to see it all happen😉
life purpose, EXPRESSED – 5 of Pentacles
Do you perhaps have significant Capricorn, Scorpio or Aquarius influences in your birth chart? These three, in all of the zodiac signs deal the most with a sense of restriction (Capricorn), ridiculously dangerous people/situations and traumas (Scorpio), as well as a disturbing sense of not belonging anywhere in the world (Aquarius). These energies tend to be really difficult to navigate through, but there’s always a great prize to be had when you’re through! Essentially, you needed to go through your experiences to really understand how poverty mindset works or how it’s developed in the first place. Poverty mindset can deal with many things beyond just the conception of money.
It is part of your life’s blueprint to come in touch with it, transmute it via first-hand experience, and dissolve it for all of Mankind. It is part of your Life Purpose to help other people learn to overcome this lack mindset on their own. You don’t necessarily need to become a teacher, but through your own example, or your self-expression whatever it may be, you help others realise their beggar patterns and tendencies. This energy is reminding me of both Bob Marley and Bob Ross though as you can see, their expressions or styles were very different from each other, but they showed people there was more to Life than just numbers in your bank account and that there is so much joy in giving and sharing your gifts with the world. That at the end of the day, what truly matters is Love and what’s truly exciting is charity to others💝
full moon self-care🔻🌒🌓🌔🌕🌖🌗🌘
Access full reading + cards on Patreon🌸
☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.
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🌙 Books for Arab American Heritage Month 🌙
🌙 Good morning, bookish bats, and Eid Mubarak to those who are celebrating. Eid al-Fitr ("the feast of breaking the fast") marks the end of Ramadan, an Islamic holy month of fasting and sacrifice. April is also Arab American Heritage month, which celebrates the 3.7 million Arab Americans across the country. This is an opportunity to combat Anti-Arab bigotry by challenging stereotypes and prejudices.
✨ One of the best ways to do so is to read books ABOUT Arab Americans. To help, here are a few books for Arab American Heritage Month you can read, discuss, or add to your ever-growing TBR!
[ List under the cut. ]
✨ Growing up, I didn't have books that represented my experiences as an Arab or Muslim American. My friends didn't have stories to read that could help them understand my perspective. With that in mind, I added children's books on the last slide, for the moms out there searching for diverse books--books that allow us to empathize and understand different perspectives and experiences.
🌙 A Woman Is No Man - Etaf Rum ✨ The Other Americans - Laila Lamami 🌙 You Exist Too Much - Zaina Arafat ✨ Grape Leaves - Gregory Orfalea and Sharif Elmusa 🌙 The Wrong End of the Telescope - Rabih Alameddine ✨ The Beauty of Your Face - Sahar Mustafah 🌙 Martyr - Kaveh Akbar ✨ Between Two Moons - Aisha Abdel Gawad 🌙 Tasting the Sky - Ibtisam Barakat ✨ A Game for Swallows - Zeina Abirached 🌙 Love Is An Ex-Country - Randa Jarrar ✨ The Thirty Names of Night - Zeyn Joukhadar
🌙 I Was Their American Dream - Malaka Gharib ✨ A Country Called Amreeka - Alia Malek 🌙 A Theory of Birds - Zaina Alsous ✨ Against the Loveless World - Susan Abulhawa 🌙 Arab in America - Toufic El Rassi ✨ The Skin and Its Girl - Sarah Cypher 🌙 Sex and Lies - Leïla Slimani ✨ Loom - Thérèse Soukar Chehade 🌙 Birds of Paradise - Diana Abu-Jaber ✨ Come With Me - Noami Shihab Nye 🌙 Girls of Riyadh - Rajāʼ ʻAbd Allāh Ṣāniʻ ✨ How Does It Feel to Be a Problem? - Moustafa Bayoumi
🌙 Evil Eye - Etaf Rum ✨ The Girl Who Fell to Earth - Sophia Al-Maria 🌙 What Strange Paradise - Omar El Akaad ✨ Girls That Never Die - Safia Elhillo 🌙 Bahari - Dina Macki ✨ Life Without a Recipe - Diana Abu-Jaber 🌙 Egyptian Diary - Richard Platt ✨ Man O'War - Cory McCarthy 🌙 The Cave - Amani Ballour, MD ✨ The Map of Salt and Stars - Zeyn Joukhadar 🌙 They Called Me a Lioness - Ahed Tamimi and Dena Takruri ✨ Salt Houses - Hala Alyan
🌙 Arabiyya - Reem Assil ✨ Mornings in Jenin - Susan Abulhawa 🌙 Shubeik Lubeik - Deena Mohamed ✨ The Wrong End of the Telescope - Rabih Alameddine 🌙 Conditional Citizens - Laila Lamami ✨ An Unnecessary Woman - Rabih Alameddine 🌙 It Won't Always Be Like This - Malaka Gharib ✨ Proud - Ibtihaj Muhammad 🌙 The Land in Our Bones - Layla K Feghali ✨ Everything Comes Next - Naomi Shihab Nye 🌙 The Immortals of Tehran - Ali Araghi ✨ Starstruck - Sarafina El-Badry Nance
🌙 Our Women on the Ground - Various ✨ The Jasad Heir - Sara Hashem 🌙 Tell Me How You Really Feel - Aminah Mae Safi ✨ Surge - Etel Adnan 🌙 Here to Stay - Sara Farizan ✨ We Hunt the Flame - Hafsah Faisal 🌙 A Tempest of Tea - Hafsah Faizal ✨ The Bad Muslim Discount - Syed M. Masood 🌙 A Girl Like That - Tanaz Bhathena ✨ Not the Girls You're Looking For - Aminah Mae Safi 🌙 All-American Muslim Girl - Nadine Jolie Courtney ✨ The Moon That Turns You Back - Hala Alyan
🌙 Ms. Marvel - Destined - Saladin Ahmed ✨ Americanized: Rebel Without a Green Card - Sara Saedi 🌙 Internment - Samira Ahmed ✨ Stardust Thief - Chelsea Abdullah 🌙 Once Upon an Eid - Various ✨ Farah Rocks Fifth Grade - Susan Muaddi Darraj 🌙 Barakah Beats - Maleeha Siddiqui ✨ Amira's Picture Day - Reem Faruqi 🌙 The Tale of Princess Fatima, Warrior Woman ✨ Lailah's Lunchbox - Reem Faruqi 🌙 In My Mosque - M.O. Yuksel ✨ Halal Hot Dogs - Susannah Aziz
🌙 The Proudest Blue - Ibtihaj Muhammad ✨ Silverworld - Diana Abu-Jaber 🌙 Other Words for Home - Jasmine Warga ✨ Time to Pray - Maha Addasi 🌙 Under My Hijab - Hena Khan ✨ Wishing Upon the Same Stars - Jacquetta Nammar Feldman 🌙 Amina's Voice - Hena Khan ✨ Yasmin the Recycler - Saadia Faruqi 🌙 The Shape of Thunder - Jasmine Warga ✨ Deep in the Sahara - Kelly Cunnane, Hoda Hadadi 🌙 The Turtle of Michigan - Naomi Shihab Nye ✨ Shad Hadid and the Alchemists of Alexandria - George Jreije
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avidrawsthings · 25 days
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Rel is Ricardo's daughter and Reina's niece, pictured here at 14 years old. She's four years older than the quads and she adores them, and in return they see her as the cool big cousin. She doesn't attend Hogwarts as she lives in Hokkaido, Japan with her dad and the Ketsueki family, and instead attends the Japanese branch of Vytaria Academy located an hour away from them.
She was born in Las Vegas on February 22, 1994.
She's named after her late aunt Rel, who was Ricardo's older half-sister and guardian.
Speaks English, Spanish, and Japanese.
Loves space, pastel colors, and cute fashion.
Has her own Familiar named Howie, who takes the form of a duck.
Rel is a Metamorphmagus like her dad, and she often uses her power to change her hair color.
She displayed early signs of Oracle Magic at a very young age. This allows her to see all potential outcomes and uses Card Magic to aid in her readings and visions.
Over time she takes up Dream Magic, Spatial Magic and Star Magic.
Extra Details
Rel's conception was completely accidental, but both parents stepped up without hesitation to see the pregnancy through. Her mother Naomi had recently Ascended to a Denizen and was in Vegas to enjoy her final days as a human before the Departure. Due to these circumstances, it was agreed that Ricardo would get sole custody once the baby was born. To anyone that asked, he would simply tell them she had become an Angel, which while technically true, many would interpret it to mean she had passed.
Ricardo wanted to surprise his family and friends after moving back to London, doubly so as he never told them he had become a parent. As for how they'd eventually end up in Japan with the Ketsueki family, that'll be left for another post lol
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I'm curious, is there any TTRPGs based around music? Either music making, or with music as a central theme.
THEME: Musical Games
Hello friend, I have a mix for you - games about musicians, games that use music, and games that leave you with a playlist at the end!
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Spicepunk 1977, by Nick Kornek.
THE YEAR IS 1997 AND POP MUSIC RULES THE WORLD.
From their secret headquarters inside Big Ben groups of Spice Girls in tour busses are dispatched to solve all of the world’s most dangerous problems with girl power and music.
It is a better world, a brighter world, a SPICE WORLD.
SPICEPUNK 1997 is a rule-light tabletop roleplaying game set in the fantastical world of the Spice Girls. Play as a Spice Girl of your own creation and prepare yourself for the unexpected as your SPICE UP YOUR LIFE!
SPICEPUNK 1997 was created by Nick Kornek & Jeanne Elizabeth Vachon. It is based on Lasers & Feelings by John Harper
If you’ve ever wanted to be Car Mechanic Spice, Space Spice, or any other kind of Spice Girl, this is the game for you. You’ll decide on a Spicealty, create a tour bus, and get ready to save the world! Using Lasers and Feelings, Spicepunk 1977 calls the roll where you hit your chosen number “Spice Up Your Life”, which recommends using Story Cubes. If you don’t have Story Cubes, using something like Tarot Cards, a Codenames Deck, or anything with randomized, general images might work as a good substitute.
Sing as One, by Naomi Norbez.
Sing As One! is a TTRPG about being a singer in an up-and-coming group of young superstars.  All of you came from different paths of life, and have varied ambitions & goals, but are coming together in your quest to make music!
This game is inspired by franchises like Uta No Prince Sama, B-Project, Tsukipro/Tsukiuta, and aoppella.  Idol franchises are about fantasy fulfillment, and this TTRPG reflects that.  This game is centered on creating cool characters, quick sessions, and simple but fun gameplay.
Create your very own pop group using this 2-page game! This game uses d4s, d6s and d10s. There are two modes of play: inside and outside battles called Faceoffs. In Faceoffs, your characters will attempt to overcome obstacles or opponents, such as rival bands, rabid fans, or your own self-doubt. You’ll roll against your opponent’s skills. In contrast, outside Faceoffs, you’ll be rolling against a pre-determined level to do things like convincing another actor to participate in your music video, breaking into your manager’s car, or smuggling as much fast food as you can into your dormitory without security finding out.
This game is still in its beta stage, so you’re working with just the rules and a hint towards the kind of setting the game is designed for. If you want to use this game for more than a simple one-shot, I’d recommend using some of your session 0 time to talk about the world these pop stars inhabit - is it in the past? The future? On another planet? It’s up to you!
RoadTrip: The Musical RPG, by AgentDolly.
You are a few friends are going on a road trip, where are you going to go, who are you going to meet, and what music will you listen to along the way? These and many other questions will be answered in Road Trip: The Musical.
Road Trip: The Musical is a game designed for 1-5 players, and while it's recommended that you be actively on a road trip while playing, it is not required. To play, all you need is a way to make a playlist, this could be Spotify, an iPod touch, a CD, or just a piece of paper and a pen. All that matters is that you can keep track of the soundtrack for your road trip.
Each player will have a different role, such as The Driver, the Navigator, or the Snack Captain. Each role comes with a special ability, such as “I’ll turn this car around”, or “Pit Stop”. This allows you to affect song choices as long as they fit certain criteria! At the end of the game, you’ll have a playlist for the group to listen to when you actually hit the road, and you can remember the game you used to create it whenever you’re on the move.
Jukebox, by jarofeyes.
Jukebox is a musical roleplaying game, played over 4 hours, with 3-4 friends and a karaoke setup. You’ll play a cast of characters who are all struggling in their own way against an overwhelming challenge. During three acts, hidden longings will be revealed, grievances will be aired, and songs will be sung. Will old wounds and personal drama doom you all to failure? Or will you change and grow just in time to save the day?
Jukebox requires no preparation and is GM-less. This is a chance for you and your friends to write your very own musical, using your favourite songs. You will design an opening setting, and create characters with their own personal challenges, while using a deck of cards as your randomization tool. This might be worth looking into if you have a group of friends that needs to stretch their legs a bit, or need their roleplaying sessions broken up into chunks.
Super Holo Bards, by anniedisaster09.
Super Holo Bards is A Transformational, Totally Sensational Bardic Adventure game borrowing a few game creation elements from Lasers and Feelings. This game can be played with 1-5 players and has optional rules for a GM also known as the Band Manager if one is wanted/desired.
This is a game about heroes with magical instruments - your characters are secretly super-musicians, using your powers for good. The game has a built-in setting that feels renaissance-fantasy in nature, but changing the options on the GM guide tables and the player backgrounds is all you should need to put your characters in whatever setting you desire. Each player has the ability to cast magical spells, as well as the ability to transform into your heroic self! Be warned though, the transformation doesn’t last - and you need time to recharge after using a spell. If you like Lasers & Feelings but you want a little bit more to the game, Super Holo Bards might be worth checking out!
Damn the Man, Save the Music, by Turtlebun.
In Damn the Man, you’ll juggle the responsibilities of a day that will determine the future of your record store, all while trying to accomplish a big personal goal. Can you confess your love to your crush and find the money that went missing from the cash box? Can you pay off your debt to your parents while promoting tonight’s big show? The clock is ticking and you’ve got until midnight to try.
Damn the Man is inspired by movies like Empire Records, Dazed and Confused, and a love for the ’90s. It’s silly and tender and no familiarity with the source material is necessary to enjoy the game.
This game is built with a lot of support tools for nervous GMs. It plays over the course of three acts, and uses playing cards to help determine what kinds of troubles the players encounter. It includes examples of play and a great outline of safety tools. By the end of the game, you'll know whether or not the store is saved or not. The game uses playbooks making character creation a little bit quicker and easier - all in all, a great option if you want to introduce roleplaying to someone new.
VOID 1680AM, by Bannerless Games.
Night after night, you sit alone with your thoughts, your music, and a microphone. Whether you come to your radio show with somber attitude or joyful spirit, you use the music that moves you to etch something fleeting and beautiful into the big empty.
There are other voices in the darkness. With a deck of cards, a six-sided die and a stack of music, you will build a playlist, invent and interact with Callers to your show, and evolve their stories over as many broadcasts as you like. No matter their motivations, they simply must be heard. In that way, you are very alike.
VOID 1680 AM includes rules for single-session and ongoing play, instructions to have your show broadcast on the airwaves as an Affiliate, and even a way to add your voice to a library of Callers that other DJs can use in their own games.
This game is inspired by Anamnesis, the 1988 film Talk Radio and Long Haul 1983.It aims to replicate the feeling of attempting to make connections with people who can only talk to you over the phone. You’ll create a cast of callers and craft a playlist based on their hopes, needs, and desires. If you want to run through a one-and-done game, you can do that, but this game also includes ways to create a series of connected stories. If you’re interested, you can check out the Press Kit before buying the whole thing!
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chuuyanakaahara · 8 months
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What’s your interpretation of Naomi?
oh boy, this one is going to be a ride.
so, you'll notice that i avoid talking about naomi often; i tend to separate her and junichirou when i talk about them despite the tanizaki siblings being intrinsically linked in canon. that's where i draw my fanon.
because i don't think junichirou is a person without naomi. there is no junichirou without naomi. naomi is the reason that junichirou is the "closest to evil" in the agency; because he does not care for human life if it isn't hers. we see even in the first few episodes and such - junichirou is willing to put it all on the line if naomi is hurt. junichirou would've killed higuchi because naomi was hurt. junichirou was willing to assassinate the port mafia don because it threatened naomi's part time job.
naomi does not do things without junichirou; she alters the course of events surrounding junichirou at every turn. naomi is the one who screwed up kunikida & junichirou's plan to get dazai to do the brunt work during atsushi's entrance exam.
whether they're siblings or not - honestly, i don't think they are, like many don't. even if they were, it doesn't change the fact that they are not people without each other. naomi makes decisions; junichirou follows them. naomi is insecure about something - junichirou enables her. whether they're lovers or best friends or something and just lying, it doesn't change that.
they both manipulate each other, to an extent, and we often see that junichirou doesn't have a spine when directly interacting with naomi rather than interacting in her defense.
he doesn't see humans as people because of naomi, and i think she's the same. we don't see her as much as we see junichirou, which is why i'm mentioning him so much, and because i truly do not think you can separate the two while keeping close to canon.
my fanon differs a lot from canon, and i know that, but as far as canon goes - naomi manipulates junichirou as much as the inverse, and at the end of the day, naomi is the one pulling the strings there.
you could argue that he is, too, but even taking the novel she's based on into account - she holds the cards there and she does so for a reason. she's incredibly smart - i think she'd be an excellent strategist if given the opportunity, she keeps a level-head in situations no one else does (like when she got fukuzawa while everyone else was arguing about it).
she also intrigues me - why is she an office worker, and junichirou is a detective? is it because he has the ability? as far as we see, he has no moral inclination toward detective work and he often becomes violent due to naomi following him into the field - why not make her a full detective, give her the protections a detective does, like a gun? why does naomi rely so heavily on junichirou? why does junichirou rely so heavily on her?
there's not a lot we know about her, and i doubtlessly am missing several things, but all in all, i think naomi is an incredibly interesting character and we should see more of her, and that she is, unquestionably, the cause behind all of junichirou's actions. naomi says jump, he says how high.
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insideliascrazyhead · 10 months
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The great expressions of High & Low 6
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„No.That´s our emotional support cinnamon roll.Two minutes without Naomi and Cobra here is gonna start murking bitches.“
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„This shit´s gonna make a great christmas card!Or no!A photoalbum.Both?!Yeah both.“
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A wild Murayama in his natural habitat.Murayama-ing and thinking about Cobra-chan while being flirted with.
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Todoroki enjoying his view.“What a great victory!“ Meanwhile Odajima:“What year is it?!I´m so exhausted Imma piss blood!“
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Local two man Motorcycle Gang on ice cream break
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Dry heaves.„Where Housen guys always that ugly or are you just a special edition?!“
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„Has this guy lost what´s left of his damn mind?!“
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„Did my daughter drop this kid on his head a few times too often?!“
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„I feel like my brain cells die everytime I speak to you!“
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screams like a feral kitty cat
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Cobra literally just existing.Meanwhile Murayma: „Spring wedding.Roses.Roadtrip Honeymoon.“
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„If we didn´t at least ran someone over who´s now spread on the damn street like peanut butter there´s no excuse to break like this man!“
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„Now that´s rude.Crazy people have a thight schedule too.Don´t interrupt me.“
70 notes · View notes
luxe-pauvre · 5 months
Text
While I think that we’re definitely in capitalism’s end-stage, I’m not quite as sanguine, because I suspect that what the contradictions of the system will generate is nothing. As with anything consumed without respite, you eventually run out, and history is no exception. How will we define ourselves when the final bill comes due, when the eternal credit card is maxed out, especially since we’re incapable of imagining anything other than capitalism? […] “What haunts me is not exactly the absence of literal space so much as a deep craving for metaphorical space,” writes Naomi Klein in No Logo: Taking Aim at the Brand Bullies, “release, escape, some kind of open-ended freedom.” As Klein describes it, advertising and design mark everything in our reality, and we’re so constricted we can’t even imagine what wild open space would look like. For all that consumerism has promised us—comfort, security, identity—it was always the assurance that we could keep on purchasing our freedom that was the biggest illusion. Now the shipments are on back order and the shelves are empty, but for the time being you can still have whatever it is you want delivered right to your front door, never mind that the driver can never stop working. What happens after collapse when we can no longer define ourselves through products? No clue—the burden of defining some better world falls to those left behind after the rest of us have already left. In the meantime, have a Coke.   
Ed Simon, Tripping the Late Capitalist Sublime
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neallo · 6 months
Text
28 | she/they | follows from @blondiest
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hi there! this is a compiled list of all my deathnote writing. this is a sideblog (i follow from @blondiest) and is also sometimes explicit. minors - please do not follow this blog or interact w/ explicit posts.
ships i write for in practice: mello/near, matt/mello/near, matt/halle
ships i write for in theory: matt/light, halle/naomi, halle/takada
below is a list of fics i have posted, separated by completion status. i also sometimes share excerpts/snippets of my writing, which can be found under the my writing tag; answered asks can be found under asks; original posts can be found under neallopost. i am not always that good at tagging things unfortunately :-) but i am. trying <3
complete:
hot soup on a cold day
rating: T | category: M/M | chapters: 5/5 | words: 15.6k | series [1/2]
“Roger,” Near says urgently, tapping the old man’s shoulder. “Roger, Mello needs another pillow.” Roger gives Near a questioning look, slight disapproval in his eyes “He’s not making me get him one,” Near clarifies. “Mello is asleep right now. He just doesn’t look comfortable, that’s all.” Roger looks like he’s about to protest, so Near adds— “And I have my mask, so I won’t get sick.” The headmaster sighs, pointing down the hallway towards the linen closet. Near retrieves the perfect pillow— not so old as to be sagging, but not so new as to be overly stiff. Once he props Mello’s head up better, gingerly moving the older boy’s head as he sleeps, he finds Roger again. “I think Mello’s room is too cold. Do you have a space heater I could use?” Roger massages his temples. “Ms. Peterson may have one in her classroom,” he replies / “Very well, I’ll ask her. Thank you, Roger.” The white-haired boy shuffles away, determined. He’s distantly aware that he's being a pest to Roger, but it's all in aid of a good cause. Mello is sick. Mello almost never gets sick, and Near is the expert on being sick, so Near is going to make sure Mello is as comfortable as possible.
hot tea on a cold night
rating: T | category: M/M | chapters: 1/1 | words: 800 | series [2/2]
Mello is half-asleep when it happens. He’s half-asleep, and he thinks Near is totally asleep, but then the younger boy wriggles in his arms, burrowing closer under the covers, and murmurs: “I love you.”
Minutes to Midnight (collaboration with @empressofthewind)
[part 2 of Time Together]
rating: E | category: M/M | chapters: 3/3 | words: 14.8k
This is the only issue Near has with letting Mello do all their debriefings: it’s easy for Near to stare, undetected and uninterrupted, for a long, long time. In New York, he mitigates this by spreading out on the floor and surrounding himself with toys or cards or dice. Whatever he needs to do to occupy himself. When they’ve travelled for cases before – which isn’t common by any stretch of the imagination – Near has relied on the movements and sounds of their colleagues to pull his attention away instead. The squeak of Rester’s chair, the tapping of Gevanni’s polished shoe, the sound of Lidner shuffling through papers. He uses whatever he can to keep his eyes off Mello. Out of sight, out of mind. Right now, he’s out of luck.
it’s you and me, that’s my whole world
[part 1 of together (always)]
rating: T | category: F/F | chapters: 1/1 | words: 3.5k
Once she reaches the first floor and steps out of the elevator, Near hears a voice floating down the hall. It’s a woman’s voice, so it must be Lidner, but the pitch of it and the cadence of speech seems painfully similar to the way Mello talked, even without being able to hear the actual words. The closer she gets, the more it sounds like her dead lover, and Near curses how cruel her mind’s tricks are. She has to grit her teeth and breathe in deep to get herself to push through the door into the main office, feeling almost nauseous with grief again already. A blonde woman in a red winter jacket stands with her back to Near, but she turns when the toy in Near’s hand clatters to the ground. Mello’s eyes are tired, underlined by dark circles, but she grins. “Hey, Near.”
i know i’m gonna lose you (but god, i don’t want to)
[part 2 of together (always)]
rating: E | category: F/F | chapters: 1/1 | words: 3.5k
Near’s bedroom— her tidy little suite in her untidy little makeshift headquarters in a high-rise hotel in Tokyo— is lit only by the shine of the city and the glow of the moon. Because the moon is full and because the city is bright, Mello can see her perfectly. Every little hair on her arms and legs catch the light as she sheds her soft, simple bra. The only thing Mello has taken off so far are her gloves. -- In which Mello rings in 2010 with some good old-fashioned lesbian sex and a minor emotional crisis. prequel to it's you and me, that's my whole world.
there's nothing i want but you
[part 1 of i want to hold you (hostage)]
rating: T | category: M/M | chapters: 1/1 | words: 1.5k
Though Near doesn’t really mind Mello’s tendency towards jealousy, he also doesn’t understand it. There’s no one in the world Near wants the way he wants Mello, no one who matters the way Mello does— he’s everything to Near. There’s no reason for him to feel jealous of anyone else. Near doesn’t get jealous of anyone else. Until, one day, he does.
nothing hurts like you do
[part 2 of i want to hold you (hostage)]
rating: E | category: M/M | chapters: 1/1 | words: 3.8k
Mello shoves him against the wall, his free hand moving from Near’s hair to the center of his chest as he holds the gun just inches from his forehead. He gives Near a once-over, quick, and at first Near thinks he hasn’t noticed anything amiss, but then an unkind smile unfurls on his face. “Hands up,” Mello says, grinning manically.
i want to hold you (hostage)
[part 3 of i want to hold you (hostage)]
rating: E | category: M/M | chapters: 4/4 | words: 21.7k
Rico asks, casual, what Mello will want next, what he’ll aim for after he gets the notebook, and suddenly it’s like the ground has dropped out from underneath him, because the first thing that comes to mind is Near. His stomach sinks as he tries to regain some semblance of composure, fighting off imaginings both tender and cruel, furious with himself for being so weak-minded. Near, he thinks forcefully, is in the past. He isn’t an option for what’s to come— and even if he was, Mello wouldn’t want him. (He wouldn’t.) (He wouldn’t.) (God. He can’t even convince himself anymore.)
my only one, my smoking gun
[part 1 of our love is god]
rating: E | category: M/M | chapters: 4/4 | words: 3.3k
For as long as he can recall, he’s ached over Near. It wasn’t always like this, though; he didn’t realize he wanted Near until it was too late to actually have him. He should be grateful, really, because he’s been able to linger here after death, and that’s more than he deserves, but God, Mello would give anything to kiss him just once.
heaven is a place on earth with you
[part 2 of our love is god]
rating: E | category: M/M | chapters: 1/1 | words: 1.4k
There is no blood or body of Christ, no priest and no pews, but it’s here and now that Mello finally rediscovers a long-lost sliver of faith. Hands on Near’s hips, Mello lowers his face and presses his mouth to Near’s soft abdomen. “I love you,” he murmurs, head bowed and eyes shut as if in prayer.
replication in reverse
[part 3 of our love is god]
rating: E | category: M/M | chapters: 1/1 | words: 1.4k
Mello mumbles something into his neck, something to the effect of waiting until Near is ready for him to move, but Near only halfway registers it. Golden hair tickles his nose, and he pictures mitosis— prophase, metaphase, anaphase, telophase— then imagines cytokinesis in reverse. Two cells pushed together until, somehow, their membranes connect, two phospholipid bilayers self-arranging into one continuous structure, cytoplasms mingling. He swallows thickly and longs for something impossible.
starry eyes sparking up my darkest nights
[part 1 of you got your eyes from the stars]
rating: T | category: F/F | chapters: 1/1 | words: 930
Near has a nightmare on the flight back to New York after the end of the Kira case; Mello, still tipsy off of the red wine they served in first class, is unexpectedly tender.
fireworks somewhere far away
[part 2 of you got your eyes from the stars]
rating: T | category: F/F | chapters: 1/1 | words: 2k
It’s the fourth of July. Or, rather, it’s still the fourth of July in the United States, which is where they live, but they’re in Madrid at the moment, so technically where they are it’s the fifth. It’s not hard math to figure out what time it is back home— it’s a little before six in the morning here, so it’ll be a little before midnight in New York. Somewhere on the West Coast or in the Rocky Mountains, though, there are fireworks going off. That’s what Near is thinking when Mello kisses her for the first time.
engaged
rating: M | category: M/M | chapters: 1/1 | words: 1.4k
“So, like, I suddenly realized… Near is into me. Like, Near wants me.” He pauses as if to allow this to sink in, looking at Matt like this is still a groundbreaking revelation the second time around when it in fact was not even groundbreaking the first. Near’s crush has been obvious to literally everyone but Mello for the past ten years. “Yes. This surprised you. And also me, because I definitely did not know that Near was into you before you told me fifteen minutes ago.” Mello nods, satisfied, entirely missing Matt’s sarcasm, which might be for the best. “So, naturally, I slept with him.” “Naturally,” Matt says. Mello does not miss the sarcasm this time. “If you’re just going to be a judgmental bitch the whole time, I’m not going to explain it again. You should be smart enough to remember what I fucking said the first time anyway.” “No, yeah, I actually think most well-adjusted people would sleep with their sworn enemies the moment they find out they’re into them.” Matt smiles tightly. “It wasn’t the moment I found out,” Mello says petulantly. “I waited like, four hours.”
it’s friday, i’m in love
rating: M | category: M/M | chapters: 1/1 | words: 2.7k
Mello abandons a night out in favor of seeing (and holding and kissing and sleeping beside) Near.
early arrival
rating: E | category: M/M | chapters: 1/1 | words: 1.5k
It’s one in the morning and Near is wide awake, talking to Mello in hushed tones as the other passengers sleep soundly around them. According to the small screen on the back of the seat in front of him, they’re more than halfway through the flight, but it’s far from almost-over— it will be another three hours before they touch down in London.
Distraction (collaboration with @empressofthewind)
rating: E | category: M/M | chapters: 1/1 | words: 2.9k
The small pout Near offers in response would, under normal circumstances, result in the rapid undoing of Mello’s resolve. Worse still is that Near has begun writhing in his lap; not quite grinding on him, but shifting his weight in a way that’s troublesome nonetheless. Mello huffs. Near is fully aware of what he’s doing. He knows the effect he has on Mello. He’s teasing him. If that’s how this is going to be, then perhaps Mello will do a little teasing of his own.
wedding doves & leather gloves
rating: E | category: F/F | chapters: 1/1 | words: 1k
“Don’t tell me,” Near says, derisive tone tainted by her words wavering. “You want to hear that I’m yours.” Exquisite pain blossoms across her scalp as Mello yanks on her hair. “Don’t be a fucking brat,” Mello hisses. “Answer me. What are you, Near?” “I’m a detective,” she replies flatly. “Just like you are.”
unknown caller
rating: E | category: F/F | chapters: 1/1 | words: 3.3k
“What are you wearing?” Near’s brow furrows in confusion. “What I always have worn.” “Mm. It’s summer, so— linen, right?” “Correct.” She wonders, then, if Mello asked the question to prompt Near to ask the same in return. Sometimes people do that. This is something she has learned since Mello left. “What are you wearing?” Near asks politely. “I am wearing,” Mello says, breathy, “black lace. It’s this— this fucking expensive set, you know— nice lingerie. I look good in it.” The description is extremely vague. Near does not know what nice lingerie looks like— she wears the same kind of cotton boyshort underwear every single day and a soft, thin bra. She also does not, honestly, know what Mello’s aim is in telling her this. It seems unlikely that she would call for the first time in five years to gloat about her finery, so there must be some kind of purpose to it, she just— “I’m touching myself,” Mello announces. Near drops the phone.
shot in the dark (collaboration with @empressofthewind)
rating: E | category: M/M | chapters: 1/1 | words: 8.2k
Mello’s posture changes, abrupt but liquid-smooth, shoulders squaring and spine straightening as he raises the gun until Near is staring down the barrel of it. Blood rushes in his ears, loud. Mello licks his lips. “Get up.”
something stronger than the drinks in the bar (matt/halle)
rating: M | category: F/M | chapters: 1/1 | words: 2.3k
A former CIA agent and an exonerated felon walk into a hotel. There’s no punchline. They just fuck.
crying only because i’m happy
rating: E | category: F/F | chapters: 1/1 | words: 575
In which Mello lovingly overwhelms her good girl.
there’s an ache in you put there by the ache in me
rating: T | category: M/M | chapters: 1/1 | words: 975
The snow angels are, in all honesty, an excuse, a shameless attempt to get Near alone, to talk with him away from all these fucking people. He didn’t expect so many of their classmates to come back to Wammy’s for the holidays, but maybe he should have— after all, he hates this place, and yet here he is, half-drunk and dragging his ex-rival-turned-ex-something-else out into the cold.
works in progress:
there’s nothing i hate more than what i can’t have
rating: E | category: M/M | chapters: 6/7 | words: 21.6k
“Ah, good morning,” Near says, and solely from the look on his face Mello knows he is missing some key fucking information. “I thought maybe you had left.” Mello shakes his head. He’s somewhat distracted by the fact that he still can’t tell if Near is naked; he’s shirtless, though, and that’s already ten times more of Near’s skin than Mello has ever seen before. Or, it’s more than he can recall seeing, anyways. And now Mello can’t stop staring at his chest. It’s so stupid, because Near is thin and scrawny and all pasty but Mello cannot tear his eyes away anyways— “So—” Mello’s voice fucking cracks as he finally manages to start speaking, a clear sign that some higher power is out to get him. He presses onwards anyways. “So, last night was…” He trails off, not even sure how he wants to finish the sentence, or if he wants to finish it at all. Near brings a pale hand to his hair and idly twirls a strand “Surprising,” Near completes the thought before glancing away. “But… not entirely unpleasant.” — In which Mello wakes up in Near’s bed after a night out and arrives at a wildly incorrect conclusion regarding the events that landed him there.
bury us both
rating: E | category: F/F | chapters: 5/? | words: 7.2k
Mello is demonstrably capable of killing, and has perhaps more reason to want Near dead than anyone else on the face of the earth. They were once rivals, and Near knows a fragment of that resentment lingers even now. She is also likely the only person who could successfully bring Mello to justice, so her very existence is a threat to Mello’s, in a sense. If that weren’t enough, there is the fact that Mello could make a fortune, too, were she to kill Near. There are no shortage of people who would pay a handsome sum to see L’s head on a platter. And it would be so simple for her to do it, so easy. She’s had countless opportunities— the two of them alone, Near in all kinds of vulnerable positions, any number of potentially deadly weapons within reach— but she’s never taken one. Despite having every possible motive and every possible chance, Mello has not killed her. On more than one occasion, she’s even protected Near. This is how she knows Mello loves her in her way, even if she has not said it aloud. Even if it isn’t enough to make her stay. -- Mello and Near through the years, in love and in agony.
what doesn't kill me makes me want you more
rating: M | category: F/F | chapters: 3/? | words: 6.3k
“Poor Near,” Mello says, stepping closer and pulling Near’s head back further, tilting her face up as Mello cages her against the wall. “How long have you liked me?” Near’s heart is kicking against her ribcage so hard it almost hurts, and her ears are burning with embarrassment. She squeezes her eyes shut, unable to hold the blonde’s gaze. “Mello, I...” she tries to speak, hoarse. “Has it been months?” Mello asks, her voice getting closer as Near feels her lean down. She braves a glimpse through her lashes and watches as Mello bends her head to brush her cheek against Near’s, putting her lips next to Near’s ear. “Years, maybe?” The older girl teases. Near finds it in herself to squeak out a “yes,” and almost jumps at Mello’s sharp intake of breath. “Years,” Mello marvels.
all’s fair in love and war (and this is both)
rating: T | category: M/M | chapters: 3/4 | words: 15.1k
Near has Mello under siege, dragging him into a battle of wits, strategy, and stealth, one that has him in a state of constant vigilance, ever-ready for an attack. With his dignity and his ego on the line, Mello throws himself head-first into psychological warfare against his longtime rival, trying any tactic he can to help him turn the tide in his favor. The game is as complex and mind-bending as four-dimensional chess, and Mello has to think twenty moves ahead just to keep up, but he’ll be damned before losing to Near at this. Or: Near accidentally gaslights Mello into being his boyfriend, and Mello does Olympic-level mental gymnastics in order to read Near’s actions as sinister.
an unusual proposal
rating: E | category: M/M | chapters: 1/? | words: 2k
“So,” Mello says. “What do you think?” Near scrutinizes his rival. Mello fidgets with the chain attached to his pants, seemingly anxious but still gravely serious. The proposal is… unconventional, to say the least, and logistically rather complicated— there are at least four-dozen things that could go wrong, and that’s just off the top of his head. It won’t be easy. His decision, though, is easy. He does not want Mello to die, and this, strange as it may be, seems like the best way to protect him. “Yes,” Near says. “I’ll do it.”
faded to oblivion
rating: E | category: F/M | chapters: 2/? | words: 3.6k
When Near phoned and asked to see him, he had a few vague guesses as to what she might need from him. This was not on the list.
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myreygn · 7 days
Note
If you're still doing the First Impressions Character ask game:
Askeladd; Tanizaki (bsd); Tendou (haikyuu!!); Akaza (demon slayer)
-soda
uaaah so many characters at once :D thanks for asking soda!! already did askeladd here
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Tanizaki
First impression
aw man he's cute too bad he's a terrorist
Impression now
i'm so soft for him i'm not even kidding, he's adorable to me and i'm so invested every time he does anything remotely out of his comfort zone because i just want him to succeed
Favorite moment
hands down when he threw himself out of a moving car and kenji caught him i'm so normal about this scene
Idea for a story
i really really really wanna write some atsutani, this ship took my heart by storm and just anything cute and fluffy for them is on my writing bucket list (also i have this nsfw draft of soukoku ft tanizaki sitting in my drafts that i'll never finish but psht)
Unpopular opinion
despite some of their scenes being uncomfortable af his relationship to naomi is actually really sweet and i wish they left the creepy stuff out so i could enjoy them without having to explain myself 💀
Favorite relationship
love tanizaki and kenji actually, they're besties in my head
Favorite headcanon
strikes me as someone who stress bakes
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Tendou
First impression
funfact tendou and makoto tachibana from free! have the same german voice actor and because i watched both of these shows in german my first reaction was turning to my sister like "holy shit is that makoto"
Impression now
he's so fun to me, i never have a bad time watching tendou do anything. i'm reading the manga rn and his commentary throughout the karasuno vs nekoma match is my favorite thing in the world
Favorite moment
it doesn't matter if you don't understand what he's saying it's all about the delivery
Idea for a story
oh hmm... good question actually lol. something tensemi idk i don't write him often
Unpopular opinion
he deserved to be bullied for that bowl cut (I'M KIDDING)
Favorite relationship
i mean we all love the ushiten dynamic but honestly tensemi will always be special to me, i live for their dynamic
Favorite headcanon
with haikyuu i never know what's canon and what's headcanon- i like to think that he got his buzzcut on a whim and then spent 10 minutes crying in front of the mirror, cradling his hair in his arms
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Akaza
First impression
i was so scared for kyojuro lemme tell you but his soundtrack was too cool i couldn't resist the epicness
Impression now
there's rarely been a character that's both so funny and so sad to me. everything about him cracks me tf up but if i think about him for more than five seconds i will start crying
Favorite moment
the moment when he sinks into koyuki's arms kills me. every. time.
Idea for a story
i really wanna do a character study with him at some point and focus on his relationship to humanity/monstrosity i just need a scenario i can weave this into
Unpopular opinion
idk what to put here so i'm just gonna say PUT SOME GODDAMN SHOES ON I DON'T NEED YOUR FEET IN MY FACE EVERY OTHER PANEL BY GOD
Favorite relationship
i fuck so hard with him and douma because douma holds all the cards in that relationship and i live for toxic imbalanced dynamics
Favorite headcanon
idk why but i like the idea that he sleeps every now and then just for the heck of it. and when he does he dreams but he never remembers them when he wakes up
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theuntitledblog · 14 days
Text
WWE WrestleMania 40 - REVIEW
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What an experience WrestleMania 40 turned out to be and may well rank as the best WrestleMania experience I've ever had even if it may not have been the best WrestleMania I've ever seen. I'm a fan of the 2 night format introduced for WrestleMania 36 and for me allows the overall event to flow better without feeling overstuffed with content. WrestleMania 40 is no different in that regard and featured what I thought was an overall good card although I personally thought it wasn't quite as tantalising as the WrestleMania 38 and 39 cards. The biggest and best thing going for this WrestleMania and made all the difference however was the storytelling. All the major matches on the card had a decent story going in and even the ones that carried my interest the least such as LWO vs. Dominik/Santos Escobar, Biance/Naomi/Jade vs. Damage Contrl and The Pride vs. Final Testament made up for it on the night with some solid performances, comedy elements and/or star power. If I was to judge Saturday and Sunday against each other then I would say that Sunday was the better of the two in but as a complete event, this was a WrestleMania that did not produce any absolute stinkers but rather some generally quality matches with a few absolute stand out moments to say the least.
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Whilst this was a WrestleMania that was brewing a number of stories going in (LA Knight/AJ Styles, Bayley/Iyo & Ripley/Lynch) there's little doubt that the whole event was centred around the Bloodline, Seth Rollins and Cody Rhodes. Whether Roman Reigns vs. Cody Rhodes was their original plan or not, few could seriously deny that WWE had crafted yet another compelling story from the Bloodline Saga going into yet another WrestleMania. At WrestleMania 38 they marketed the third Reigns/Lesnar encounter as 'The Biggest Main Event of All Time', frankly they could've done that here and it would've actually delivered on that tag line. The Bloodline is perhaps the greatest faction in the modern era of WWE that has dominated the landscape since 2020 and has constantly evolved to keep itself fresh and relevant when it sometimes felt that the story had run its course. The double Bloodline Main Event delivered two classic matches with finishes that felt right and complimented each other leading to the triumph that was the Sunday Night Main Event. Cody Rhodes' 'finish the story' arc has been going on for a lot longer than I think any of us expected. Many, including myself, felt that the WrestleMania 39 Main Event went the wrong way and was a missed opportunity yet the irony is that the result of this event was even more tantalizing because of the previous year. It felt poised for the story to finish but there was always a doubt about whether they would or not. It's testament to the long term storytelling approach of the current era and what makes it all work even more is the genuine emotion behind it. The closing moments of WrestleMania 40 are right up there alongside WrestleManias 20 and 30 yet those moments shouldn't overlook that Cody and Roman worked an an outstanding match to get there as did Seth Rollins and The Rock the night before. Both Saturday and Sunday's Main Events were full of near falls and incidents and the run ins (on Night 2) went completely off the chart with the Undertaker's appearance especially feeling very distinct. I can't remember the last time the Main Event of a WrestleMania was actually the match of the night but with WrestleMania 40, both main event matches stole the show for me.
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Rhea Ripley and Becky Lynch opened WrestleMania 40 with a very good match that I felt never quite reached the quality that Rhea Ripley vs. Charlotte Flair did at WrestleMania 39. I was initially disappointed because I was hoping for an absolute classic but it was later revealed that Becky Lynch was wrestling unwell which changes my perception a lot of this match. It was the predictable but right result and further cements Rhea Ripley as the top female wrestler in WWE today and it certainly didn't make sense for me to move the title onto Becky Lynch who frankly didn't need it at this stage of her career. A strong opening for WrestleMania 40.
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Sami Zayn defeating Gunther and ending the longest Intercontinental Title run in history was a big WrestleMania moment for him and turned out to be one of the best matches on the card. Was this better than the Triple Threat Match Gunther had with Drew McIntyre and Sheamus last year? Not for me and I'm still not 100% sure whether Sami was the right person for this but there's no denying the quality of the execution. It was a great feel good moment that was well positioned to balance the card out when you consider how the result of the Main Event tag match was going to go. It was the feel good moment Saturday needed and was the second best match on the Saturday card for me. I'm a huge Gunther fan and while I'm disappointed his run as champion is over, truthfully he's done as much as he can with that title and will hopefully be positioned into the main event scene in the coming months.
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The type of match Seth Rollins and Drew McIntyre worked was not what I was expecting and reminded me of the sort of fast paced, frantic, finisher heavy encounters that we saw with Brock Lesnar in recent years. Yet it made sense when you factor in the long running injury storyline with Seth Rollins plus Rollins had worked a 45 minute match the previous evening. This certainly set the pace and mood for WrestleMania Sunday that it would be one that they followed all night right into the Main Event. What followed with CM Punk and Damian Priest however I thought was storytelling genius. McIntyre vs. Punk is gonna be a long gestating feud and the inevitable clash is going to be something to really look forward to and that's going to be in no small part due to this moment. Well judged, smart and forward thinking; this was one of WrestleMania 40's best moments.
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I love a triple threat match especially when done well with superstars who have great chemistry, timing and creativity. Logan Paul/Kevin Owens/Randy Orton made for a great WrestleMania pairing and it delivered exactly what you would want for an event of this magnitude. It keeps getting said however Logan Paul deserves plenty of plaudits for the performances he delivers and this year is no different. Better than the WrestleMania 39 triple threat match? Still a no for me but then again that was a very different type of match that played out. This match here is one of the best WrestleMania 40 served up.
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What a statement this match was. Not only was this match high up on the card but it featured a trailblazer for women's wrestling who finally got her WrestleMania moment against one of the finest to come out of NXT. A real opportunity to showcase the biggest night of the wrestling year and neither of them disappointed. I did wonder whether they had the best chemistry but they put on a great performance and the match was helped by a crowd who were into it from the very start. Very good match.
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BEST NIGHT - Sunday/Night 2
BEST MATCH - Cody Rhodes and Seth Rollins vs. Roman Reigns and The Rock (Night 1)
WORST MATCH - Jimmy Uso vs. Jey Uso (Night 1)
BEST MOMENT - Cody finishes the story
WORST MOMENT - The table accidentally breaks in The Pride vs. The Final Testament match
EXCEEDED EXPECTATIONS - LA Knight vs. AJ Styles
SHOULD'VE BEEN BETTER - Naomi, Bianca Belair & Jade Cargill vs. Damage Contrl
BEST ENTRANCE - Seth Rollins (Night 2)
WORST ENTRANCE - Bayley
UNSUNG HERO - Seth Rollins
VERDICT OF WRESTLEMANIA 40
A WrestleMania of generally high quality matches supporting two Main Event matches telling a compelling story. This is a WrestleMania that will rightly be remembered as the night Cody finishes his story in one of the greatest feel good moments in WWE history. A very good WrestleMania but perhaps not the best WrestleMania.
****
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hoardlikegoldenirises · 8 months
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Geckonyx aka Naomi Ishii, herpetologist and licker of rocks. Oh, and she can stick to things.
I have no self control so I designed several alternate costumes for Naomi, because I wanted to play with different color schemes and patterns inspired by different kinds of gecko (...and one frog)
And... a couple different variations for her head for each of them, because of my inability to choose between helmet and mask. I like both, I just don't want her to look too much like Spider-Woman. But I think, thanks to Blue Beetle and my emphasizing the round shape, that her masks look pretty distinct from any of the Spider-Women. It's still extremely blatantly Spidery to give a female wallcrawler this kind of mask, even if she doesn't shoot webs, but I think the bulbousness of the lenses and the cutout around her nose really helps shift the vibe.
EDIT: changed her gloves to all be fingerless so she can use her venom.
Closeups and some (a lot of) notes under the cut:
Western Banded Gecko (aka Naomi's first costume):
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okay this is the oldest both literally and metatextually lol, I drew this in 2022 when I was first designing everyone, though it's had a minor color modification since then (more rose gold, less pink, but looks basically exactly the same) This one is rougher because I didn't bother redrawing the body for it. I'm only making the neat pics for the designs I haven't made refs for (and Seth's upgraded suit for completion's sake)
(Naomi is 30 by the way. she gets carded a lot.)
So, the western banded gecko. they don't have that much green irl, mostly like cream and pink and maroon, but there are hints of green so I included that because I liked the contrast. also. something i did not realize at the time is that, uh, i don't think... western banded geckos... stick. my excuse is that i am not a herpetologist and I just thought they looked cute and had nice colors. my retroactive excuse for Naomi is that she thought it was funny.
Anyway. This is Naomi's first costume, which she handmade. In-universe, while she is, yes, a herpetologist, she is also... a nerd. wait. she's already a nerd—I mean she likes comic books, cosplaying, lucha and pro-wrestling, not just lizards and rocks. So yes maybe I did purposefully give her a lucha mask to evoke Spider-Man, since she's a wallcrawler, and maybe I did purposefully make her literally a Spider-Man Fan because I thought it was funny, but also in my defense as far as mask design, I have... way too many goggles in my lineup... 😂 I had to have some variety in there. also it seemed like a good workaround for long hair.
The G on her chest is also meant to be a lizard/tail btw. And she made the whole costume herself out of fabric she got from the craft store and like, tights and stuff, so... iridescent mermaid scale spandex, etc. You can see her cosplay skills at play here compared to, for example, Seth's homemade Scratch costume, which, while sleek in its own right, is literally just black sportswear and a motorcycle helmet LOL
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the little yellow strap-on shoes. The tights are stirrup tights, that way Naomi has the most important parts of her feet exposed but the tights will still stay put etc etc etc. They're probably a really high denier lol
Why does she really need the stirrup cut to expose the soles of her feet though? Well, since I have her using setae/van der waals forces to cling (vs. my version of peter parker, who has a fullbody electrostatic aura that works by charging his entire body including his clothes), this means... Naomi can't wear shoes or gloves while she sticks... at least, not without special materials. So her outfit is designed with that in mind; fingerless gloves so her fingertips are exposed and easily removable shoes she puts on a carabiner on the back of her waistband:
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So practical! It's probably got a snap crotch leotard for the white part too but I didn't bother figuring that out here.
Anywho—upgraded suits.
Blue Tailed Day Gecko (female coloration):
This is the main intended step up I was thinking for her, despite the multiple other suits in this post. Consider this one "canonical" lmao idk what the rest are for i'm just like this.
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The G logo on this one is a little smoother in its curves which I could say was on purpose but was kind of just me not really looking at the original when I drew it LOL though it IS supposed to look more like a tail, so that works fine for my purposes. I was originally considering giving her an actual lizard symbol (like the kind that show up if you google "lizard logo" I guess...) but I didn't like the way it looked in my sketches and trying to add little legs just felt too cluttered so I kept it simple. Unfortunately it does look kind of like a maggot or something when it's white like this, but I don't think Naomi would consider that a bad thing 😂
For most of my refs I didn't bother with the sexual dimorphism and stuff while looking for inspiration, but blue-tailed day lizards have like, really strong color dimorphism and I liked both a lot so I wanted to do one for each. So this one is inspired by the female coloration.
I didn't bother trying to recreate the lizard's pattern particularly, mostly focused on colors and vibes and good silhouettes that still evoked the shapes in her handmade costume. The copper spots on her back are based on that lizard's patterning though. But the female blue-tails tend to be pretty green, with a hint of blue, so I went with the blue-green gradient, and then since they have a lot of browns and earth tones I went with the sparkly bronze and the copper colors, and a fun coppery-bronze visor.
Anyway she will probably be a little more muscular by the time she gets a nice suit like this, just from supporting her own body weight (though she doesn't exactly weigh a whole lot and her strength is completely un-augmented so like... can't compare to Seth, whose job it is to leap five feet into the air and lift 5'10" athletes above their head lol) but she's still not exactly a bruiser.
(*edited 11/1 to add texture to green material, since, you know, lizards... scales... etc.)
And something you may be wondering is:
Why a helmet?
Well.
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That's why.
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Me, sowing by purposefully referencing Spider-Man in my wallcrawler's costume: teehee~
Me, reaping when I realize I can't put lenses on her mask without making her Literally Just Spider-Woman: fuck
I've got my ways though. Obviously. I wanted to keep the almond shape of the lucha silhouette even for the helmets though so I looked at some sentai helmets as reference and I just kinda winged it.
also I like that the visor on this helmet is kind of shaped like a heart 🧡 and also kind of like a butterfly 🦋 it's a good fit for Naomi, who is supposed to be cheerful and cute on top of liking, you know, lizards and bugs and shit.
At the same time I decided to play with variations on the lucha style mask and round bug-eyed lenses that aren't framed, and I do like how those look... I just can't tell if it's too Spider-Man or not. But I like the look so much I think I might use it... maybe she swaps between helmet and mask depending on context and weather.
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Very cute... extra shimmery...
Anyway like my scribbly handwriting says, the helmet also serves, well, helmet purposes, to protect Naomi's head if she falls. Which is like, "well why would that even be a problem?" and the answer is simple: Naomi doesn't have super strength and her healing power is technically only "enhanced," generally speaking. Not to burden the Spider-Man comparisons but if you think about silver age and some early bronze age Peter Parker, it's kinda like that. She's tougher than she was before, and heals a little faster, but she can still break her arm if she falls wrong, or get laid up with the flu (though she's probably not quite as flu-prone as Peter, the guy who appears to have caught every flu strain known to man.)
In my head (...badum tss) she uses the helmet outside/high up/if it's cold or in other situations she might need more protection, and the mask is for like, indoors, more cramped spaces, or casual situations that still require her to keep her face hidden but maybe not quite as anonymous. also like, probably talking to people would be easier in the mask since her mouth is free and I didn't exactly put vents or filters on these helmets. (that's how you know they aren't regular materials)
Naomi does have some latent regenerative healing abilities (tied to the gecko theme) but—and I mean this in the most literal way possible: it doesn't work if she loses her head, so a helmet is probably still a good idea. also she won't know about this ability until something needs to grow back so her subconscious suit design would probably not take regeneration into account anyway?
idk i haven't quite worked out how these suits work yet. I know they're programmable matter and some kind of exotic or metamaterial, and in my head I've been thinking about them as similar-ish to the Fantastic Four's unstable molecules, but as far as specifics go, I dunno.
Wait I know one specific.
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The white parts on her palms and soles are (some kind of silicon substrate probably?) made with CARBON NANOTUBES in them. This was in my plans already in a vague sense, in that I knew her fancy upgraded suit was going to get rid of the barefoot requirement and specifically allow her to use shoes, but it wasn't until a few days ago in a wiki hole that I realized I could use carbon nanotubes for that. I was just gonna handwave it lol
But basically my thought process for carbon nanotubes was like, gecko/nano tape but... more. I don't think irl gecko tape can support the weight of a grown adult woman, even a small one... (though there is some invention out there that figured out you can actually use van der waals forces to support a human being but they're real bulky)—but it's a neat idea and really what is more superheroic than partial science? and now she can still use her sticking powers without having to take her shoes off.
take that foot fetishists.
Anyway, her shoes aren't strictly climbing shoes (I don't think they're that curved) but I was looking at pics of climbing shoes for inspiration, so that's where the overall shapes and the super smooth soles are from.
(oh also it's cut off there but as I note in the drawing: Naomi's skills are mostly reconnaissance and stealth (despite her extremely vibrant colors), and anything focused on maneuverability, because while she has peak human reflexes, her strength is unimpressive and her healing ability is only mildly enhanced, like I said earlier, so she is not a very good offensive fighter.)
okay next!
Blue Tailed Day Gecko (male coloration):
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I Swear To God I didn't do the red and blue on purpose, it literally didn't occur to me until after I had colored it. I just thought the male blue-tails looked cool lmao. But I think it's got enough green tones and so little red that it doesn't really evoke Spidey's red and blue anyway, especially since her visor is blue-black instead of white. So I'm not sweatin' it.
I actually really like how this one came out too. I was having some trouble with incorporating the green but I think this very soft glaucous green works really well. I could almost see this one being a like... slightly more stealth-focused suit... obviously it's still brightly colored and the arms are still pretty light, but the deep colors overall evoke a slightly more nighttime oriented feel for me.
...a blue-tailed night gecko, if you will.
Made this one a little metallic-sparkly but not as glittery as the one with the female coloration. This one has a tiny bit more inspiration from the lizard's actual markings (mostly on the helmet) but is still of course all about clean lines and good silhouettes.
The logo also ended up smaller and slightly different which, IDK why I didn't just copy-paste, but I like how it looks this way anyway so eh. They don't HAVE to be identical.
I don't really know what texture the green should be though. More glitter seems like a bit too much. In my head I'm thinking it might just be a very, very matte, soft texture but surprisingly durable. It's not like it's made of spandex so it can really be pretty much any texture. That's also why it's possible for the helmet to match the fabric color and glitter perfectly 😂 I'd feel bad for any real life costume designer who had to deal with this... lmao
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mask version...
I had a terrible realization with this one because I didn't look up pictures of Spider-Woman until afterward and it turns out she has a triangle on her forehead which I had forgotten about LOL but I think it's still different enough. There's some Blue Beetle influence in there that I think helps differentiate it pretty well. Like, okay, if she was a Marvel character I would assume she was a spider-person or some weird cross between Koi Boi and Spider-Woman, but outside of Marvel... I think it's got a good vibe.
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pop of contrast with the red knees again. I just think it looks nice and the kneepads let me evoke the bike short-style cut on her homemade costume without actually putting her in shorts.
Pretty similar here for soles, slightly different silhouette but that's about it. palms are the same, white and rubbery but flexible. I imagine her gloves move kind of like a second skin despite being all one piece without any seams. fuck helmet matching, i would REALLY feel bad for an irl costume designer having to make that work in live action.
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Here's a better look at the actual palm btw.
and also. her fingertips. ridges from setae already weird enough but not noticeable unless someone looks close or can feel her fingers, and then... the new ability... to shoot modified hairs in the form of hollow needles with which to inject venom.
it's an awful mental image, tbh. lmao. the venom she uses is similar to that of gila monsters or beaded lizards. (not bearded)
Part 2!!!
Northern Spiny Tailed Gecko:
Okay! I'm mixed on this one tbh. lol.
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I did this one kind of on a whim cause I saw a pic of one of these lizards and I thought they looked cool, though not really Naomi's like... aesthetic. So I guess this is kind of like... what if Naomi got serious... but still was Naomi LMAO she can't resist the hint of shimmer... (wait that's me.)
I like the way the mask turned out significantly more than the helmet for this one, though I like the spikes on the helmet. But the lenses specifically turned out a lot better imo. I was looking at the actual lizard's weird fucking eyes and was like, how the hell do I evoke that. And then I remembered that, even if this WASN'T made of some kind of unknown unstable molecule or nanomachines or whatever the fuck, you can put patches of different colored foil films on real life motorcycle visors and sunglasses and stuff, so that's basically what I was thinking about there. She still sees out it the same, though with I guess random dots of full spectrum color vs... orange-tinted... LOL
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This suit was actually surprisingly hard to do. Turns out doing a completely monochromatic fullbody suit in any color other than black is... difficult, if you want it to actually look good. I did know I wanted it textured at least... but the rest, hard. That's why the white lines are there tbh. It just needed something for visual interest.
The G on this one is segmented/broken up instead of soft curves to fit the slightly edgier look, and also as a reference to geckos' famed ability to detach and grow back their tails. (Naomi doesn't have a tail and she can't detach her limbs but she can do the other part...!)
I gave it spikes to match the spiny appearance of the lizard... wow... so edgy... 😂 Actually it was super odd to do a costume like this in such a pale color, because normally when I do more grim costumes, they feature a lot of black and very vibrant accents like purple or red. (Though I guess the orange color of the lenses here is a bright color...)
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Since I've been heavily referencing climbing shoes so much, it made sense to me to put crampons on her shoes. More spikes! I doubt they're super useful but, maybe... I mean. I'm sure they'd make a kick in the balls real killer. oh... hm. I mean obviously this is a weaponized costume, but... is this her weaponized costume? her only chance at offense as a 100 lb wallcrawler... metal spikes.
Assume they are reinforced and framed inside where it's not visible, in this magic superhero costume that doesn't need to follow the laws of tailoring. The angled knee pads are my way of doing knee spikes cause unless you got a full suit of armor that never looks good lmao. They are def hard on the outside though.
Also this whole color scheme and the white on the palms just makes me think of like... sharks... which I guess its fitting.
Anyway this costume was... interesting to work on. It was mostly an experiment, and IDK if she'll ever use it (I say this like I have a story about anyone other than Seth lmfao) because I already have several characters with white, red and black color schemes (though Tama's includes gold) so I didn't want to add yet another, but it was just such a neat looking lizard I couldn't resist.
next!
Lygodactylus williamsi aka the Electric Blue Day Gecko:
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I like the color of this one... could not resist adding yet MORE glitter, though I figured the body could be one of those very, very slightly shimmery matte looking deals in contrast to the super heavy flake glitter in the helmet and mask. would film terribly. lmao.
I was briefly judging myself for giving every helmet a different visor for some reason instead of using the same one to save my hand (meanwhile i copy pasted the mask XD) especially since... Naomi is NOT the only one with a helmet (if I keep her helmets at all) but what I realized is that most of her helmets in this lineup still have similar enough visor shapes that it's pretty thematically consistent even though they're all different. I think the tree frog and the spiny gecko helmets, aka the two most experimental costumes here, are the most divergent, but they still have like... the rough overall vibe of curves and heart shapes. but this electric blue helmet fits very neatly in with the blue-tailed helmets, so I like that. I could see this one slotting very neatly in with the blue-tailed day gecko suits as a set.
Which, importantly, means I probably don't have to worry about TJ's helmet when I get to him, especially since his is going to be significantly more influenced by Power Rangers and super sentai stuff... I'll probably give him a way weirder visor shape.
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Anyway, this suit was another case of monochrome making my life difficult but you know what makes everything look better? Gradients. Lmao. and more shimmers. I just like sparkles, and I liked the idea of leaning into Naomi having a consistent aesthetic as far as being colorful and sparkly, even when it's toned down. (right, "toned down," as if the helmet accompanying it isn't extremely over the top lmao)
In my head the material on her gloves and shoe soles is like... a really sticky-looking (but not—well. it is sticky but it's not wet) kind of gummy, rubbery, or like... jelly almost? but like. on an opaque base cause her hands and feet are in there. like... one of those translucent rubber ducks...
(*edit 11/1 added texture to this one as well)
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Attempts Were Made...
I considered making a version based on the female coloration of this lizard, as a counterpart, but my hand hurts after spending three days on drawing superhero costumes...lol. if I do draw a counterpart like that, I think it would be a mix of rose gold/copper and a shimmery iridescent gold-green, I think... either a front-to-back gradient or with side panels. or even like... almost like those tinted holographic fabrics...
anyway
Red Eyed Tree Frog:
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Okay this isn't a gecko but it occurred to me while I was taking a break yesterday and it sounded fun... It's not technically on theme since her vigilante/hero/whatever name is literally Geckonyx lmao but it is on theme in that she probably likes frogs, aside from obviously being a wallcrawler.
Also when I realized I could make her helmet for this one look like an alien... bro. how could i RESIST?! I think this is by far the cutest helmet I have drawn, ever.
Unlike the other costumes, but similarly to the electric blue costume, this one has the back and front of the hand all the same material (does that mean she can stick with the backs of her knuckles in this suit???)
As far as styling goes, this one was very straightforward since it's pretty obviously literally just the exact pattern on a red eyed tree frog (well, plus the rubber G) lol — this is also the One where I started to figure out her mask, and that's because frogs have big round eyes. I copy pasted the mask from this one to all the others lol.
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also came very close to looking like Seahawks colors (lol) but thankfully the cool base I used for the metallic blue drew it away from that a little, on top of being a little lighter than the navy they use. (plus the blood orange/scarlet accents)
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rubbery texture on the shoes again for sure... not so sure about the green though... like is it also rubbery... like un-laminated neoprene?? pleathery/leather-like texture? idk. not shiny spandex, i know that much.
texture: skin?
ANYWAY
That's it!! IDK why I felt the need to design four extra suits for Naomi on top of her upgrade, but it's fun to think about all the gecko colors... who knows, maybe she needs a variety... every wallcrawler needs a stealth suit. and. a bunch of other ones. duh.
UPDATE: realized I still need the full gloves for certain situations—luckily, when I did the fingerless gloves, I just drew fingers on top of the full gloves in a separate folder, so i still have all of them lol.
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Considering the lizard theming there is something strangely fitting about Naomi being able to switch between helmet and mask, full glove and fingerless glove, all as needed. Something chameleonic, if you will.
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lcv3lies · 2 years
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004 — more than that !
“ever-evolving k-pop! the heart of the korean wave!”
“with the world watching…”
“it’s music bank live!”
“annyeonghaseyo, kim/jinnie imnida!”
“i’m korea’s princess, y/n”
“and i’m the robber of your heart, hyunjin”
“CUT” the director yelled for probably the millionth time that hour. “that’s not what your line is, hyunjin. read it PROPERLY this time.”
you heard him scoff from beside you. you were annoyed, evidently. you had thought hyunjin would take his MC job seriously. clearly— you were wrong. he was having more fun wasting yours and everyone else’s time.
“i really don't understand why it's so hard for you two to at least act like you can tolerate one another.”
obviously, it was the producer criticizing both you and hyunjin.
"it’s not my fault that hyunjin didn’t bother to learn his lines!” you said, in a slightly more defensive tone that you wanted.
“oh for god’s sake, you’re acting like you haven’t been shooting daggers at me with your eyes this whole time.”
hyunjin and you argue back and forth until your manager yells at you to ‘suck it up’ , since the both of you are stuck together for months.
"PLEASE, for the last time, can you both act like you can stand each other WITHOUT wanting to bite the other’s head off?” hyunjin’s manager scolds, holding the part between his two eyebrows.
hyunjin, who was clearly over this whole fiasco angrily threw his mc cards on the floor and stomped out, not before slamming the door so hard you felt the ground shake.
now you were left, cleaning up his mess.
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a/n : felix look at me baby this isn’t u 😕💔
prev. | 005
taglist ˖◛⁺ @moasworld @stopeatread @hyunxo @qimmylol @luvhyun3
��︎. *. ⋆ ࿔
until next time,
naomi 🫂
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andromedafae · 1 year
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Shadowrun Commission - Naomi Tesla/Hammerhead For this one, I worked on 2 versions of the same character. She works with a corp and also work as a runner I painted both the character's cards in watercolor, but the bg desk and lettering is done in photoshop :) Was a fun experience mixing both
Materials I used: Black Nanquim Offset white paper 90gr.
Pentel watercolor set (12 colors), Faber Castell watercolor pencils Colors and Edit: Photoshop CC2018
Characters belong to Justin Patnode Do not use or repost without permission
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