#(this one is less good bc being soft and in love is hard lol)
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You're super good at smut, but what do you think Matty would be like if his gf one time would like something more vanilla? Sorry If I'm ruining the mood I'm just super sad tonight and I'm thinking more gentle, still super good though, sex.
oh thank you <333
and you are so not ruining the mood, I LOVE soft romantic sex just as much as the other stuff. I'm sorry you're feeling sad lovely, I really hope you start feeling better soon <333
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I can see you having a really hard few weeks, and you've not been up to anything remotely sexual. matty is, of course, completely fine with it, and has been so kind and patient with you.
you just need to be taken care of. You need to hear how much he loves you. how much you mean to him. and matty is more than happy to oblige.
maybe you start making out slowly on the sofa, just soft, warm kisses that grow needier and needier. the kisses are making you dizzy, and you can feel the love pouring from matty in each one. they're perfectly wet and sticky in a way that drives you insane, and mattys warm tongue pressing against yours is making you increasingly needy.
you pull back and look at matty with a soft pout. You simply say, "Please?" and he nods immediately.
he grabs your hips and lies you down on the sofa, treating you like you're made of glass. cradling your head and stroking your hair as you lay down.
he looks down at you with a love-struck look. Your hair was fanned out around in a way that made you look heaven sent. the soft flush that covered your cheeks and chest drew matty in, he leant down and began to press kisses wherever he could reach.
his velvety, hot lips make their way across your chest, mouthing slowly at your collarbones and neck. he doesn't leave any marks, just sweetly worshipping your body, making you understand how deeply he loves you.
"You look so beautiful, my darling. always do," he says, pulling back with a smile, brushing your cheekbone gently with his fingers.
his eyes were black with desire, but you could still see the adoration swimming within them. You smile shyly and try to hide your face in your hands, but matty grabs your wrists to stop you.
"Don't hide your pretty face, baby, let me love you," he says softly, pressing a peck to your palm and placing your hands on his shoulders before leaning in to kiss you.
and it stays slow and sensual. He pulls down your panties and his boxers. before slipping in with a satisfied groan. holding himself there for a few seconds, feeling the unspoken connection that you two share.
your warm skin slips together, fusing as one. he's deep within you, and you've never felt more intertwined.
He swaps between burrowing his head in your neck and leaning back to watch your face in awe. he takes note of your flickering eyelids, and of the way your jaw drops and the sweetest moans leave your lips.
"m' so lucky to have you, sweet girl. my angel."
he would be focused on you, your pleasure, and making sure you're comfy. he's checking in regularly, ensuring you're happy to continue.
after a whimper from you, he pulls back with worried eyes, "You okay? do you want to stop, baby? we can just cuddle if you'd prefer, " he says, stilling within you, awaiting your response.
you smile and shake your head at him, "No, no. feels so good. Please keep going. " You whisper to him, pulling him deeper and kissing him firmly.
the whole time, it's unhurried. His pace is even and gentle, staying deep within you.
he whispers reassurance to you the whole time because he can't quite believe he gets to do this with you. his heart feels full, his mind only ever thinks of you. he's completely and utterly enamoured and entranced.
his thrusts are languid and tender, intent on making you cum first. listening to your breathing and moans to know when you're close.
"s'okay baby, you can cum whenever you need to. please, cum for me princess" he whispers against your lips before surging forward to kiss you.
the coil in your stomach continues to tighten, winding tighter and tighter with each rhythmic roll of his hips. you can feel the flush on your face and your skin heating up. throbbing around matty desperately, savouring the growing heat beneath your skin.
with a shudder dissolved into pleasure, arching your back and groaning at the feeling of your pebbled nipples brushing against his hard chest. your walls spasm around him, and matty can't help the grunt that leaves him as they do, warm and wet as you pulse around him.
Matty keeps moving slowly inside you, chasing his own orgasm, "where do you want me, angel?" he asks breathlessly. You don't respond verbally but instead link your feet together behind his back, causing him to burrow even deeper inside you.
he cums with a groan, whimpering and whispering in your ear as he does, "oh s-shit. I love you so fucking much, oh my god. you're perfect, so perfect for me"
he buries his head in your neck and you can feel him smile against you, you can't help the grin that spread across your lips at the feeling of his hot cum within you and your warm sweaty skin binding together.
as soon as your hands slide over his shoulders, he flops on top of you. You giggle at his lack of finesse and run your hands over his back, kissing his temple softly.
"Thank you, I love you," you pant, turning your head to look at him adoringly.
"I love you too," he says softly, meeting your eyes and giving you a sweet peck.
maybe he eats you out afterwards, grunting and groaning at the musky taste of you mixing on his tongue. or perhaps you just lay there, basking in the glow of each other.
#never ruining the mood with slow soft sex#i love it so much#i only write kinky stuff because its easier#sometimes being sentimental is 1000x more difficult than some kinky shit lol#if only there was a song about how scary sincerity is or something...#anon!#teacher au!#(this one is less good bc being soft and in love is hard lol)
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i did send the same thing to another writer i enjoy bc i love different takes on things, but my little dumpster brain has had one thought in the last 24 hours - imagine confiding in your captain that you'd like to have a baby bc biological clock or whatever, and being in the field really puts a damper on your sex life, so that makes it difficult. but the 141 will do anything for one of their own, so if that means they're running trains and taking turns on you DAILY until it takes (and probably even after 👀), then so be it.
lol... you lit a fuckin' fire with this ask, my friend. hot!!
"The Window" (141/Reader)
You awoke to the soft tinkling noise of his belt and zipper, rattling at the edge of your bed. Your captain, John Price, was answering his call of duty, and within moments, you knew he would slip his fat, flaccid cock between your legs and allow your warmth to make him harden within you. He preferred it this way. First, he would rub you with it, heavy and smooth, smearing your wetness all over his skin. Then, with a singular talent, he would somehow stuff his soft, lolling head into your hole, feeding himself into you gently, letting your body take him in on its own as your pussy pulsed for him, and he would rub your clit absent-mindedly, comforting himself with your swollen lips, sighing raggedly as you covered him up. Once he was hard - and fuck, he was impossibly hard - he would fuck you through your blinding pleasure, his girth giving you burst after burst of hot, searing bliss.
He wasn’t your boyfriend - none of them were - but the members of your task force, the 141, had all agreed to be the father of your child. It had started when Captain Price first saw your appointment on the team calendar. You’d meant to post it privately, but you had failed to do so. He came to you right away, his face full of worry,
“Wha’s goin’ on, Spar? Goin’ to the main base hospital… Wha’s all this about?”
So, you’d told him, a little bashfully, that you were trying to get pregnant. You’d be turning 28 this fall, and you wanted to be a mom, sooner rather than later. Every few weeks, you were shipped off to some too-cold or too-hot locale, getting shot at and flash-banged. There wasn’t really time to find a date, much less convince them that you would make a good mother. The last time you tried to use Tinder, one guy had called you ‘Rambo’ and blocked you, so it wasn’t going well.
“I’ll go with you, little bird. Sounds important.”
“You don’t need to do that, Captain. I’m sure I can take out a loan for it…” You thought out loud, remembering the pamphlet and all of its cost breakdowns for IVF treatments.
“A loan? Last time I checked, love, it was free,” he chuckled.
“Free when you have someone who’d be willing to give it to you, sir,” you challenged him with your confidence, trying not to be ashamed, even of your ‘Rambo’ nickname.
“Sparrow,” he raised his voice and nearly shouted your callsign incredulously in the small mess hall where he’d found you, “There’s no bloody way you don’t have someone willing.”
“Wha’s goin’ on, Cap?” Gaz poked his head in behind the door.
“Nothing,” you tried to stop the literal landslide of embarrassment that was happening to you.
“She wants to have a baby,” Price told him, smiling a bit as your cheeks turned pink.
“A baby?” Gaz commented with no small amount of surprise.
“Who wants a baby?” Simon yelled out from the hallway before opening the door wider and scooting around Gaz to join into the conversation.
“A bairn!?” Soap barged in, slamming the door all the way open and forcing Gaz to tumble into the kitchen.
So, the whole team knew in a matter of moments, but Price kept his word. He drove you to the hospital for your appointment and asked more questions to the doctor than you did. Unfortunately, he heard all of the strictest rules and took them to heart. No cigarettes, no caffeine, plenty of rest and… plenty of exposure to male ejaculate.
There had been a meeting, of which you were not a part, between Price and the other men in your task force, and they had come to a conclusion: they would put a baby in you. It was their singular mission. A bit of back and forth had occurred when you found out their plan.
“Is there… we dinnae want to pressure you, lass, but,” Soap looked around at Ghost, Gaz, and Price before settling back on you, “Are there any of us you wouldnae like to be the father? We willnae take offense.”
“No! I’d be happy to have any of you… I mean… But, I don’t want you to feel like you need to do this if you don’t want to,” you could feel the heat of your shame rising in your cheeks, and you knew you were as red as a lobster. You heard a bit of laughter at your comment and feared the worst. But then, Gaz explained,
“I’m afraid all of us very much want to, Sparrow.”
He had even palmed his growing cock for emphasis.
But, it had to be fair, you decided. There should be a schedule; no favorites. And for the first month, there was. Soap was your Monday, Ghost was Tuesday, Gaz was Thursday, and Price was Friday. But then Price had a meeting and so Soap was Friday, and Price was Saturday. That meant Ghost was Monday. You were in training on Tuesday, so Gaz was Wednesday, but Soap couldn’t do Thursday or Friday because he had to go in for his annual review. So, he joined Gaz on Wednesday, stepping in right after him as if you were a pretty little mailbox and the boys had come to drop off their packages.
When the weekly schedule fell apart, you hung a big calendar in your quarters, and they’d pencil themselves in. That was fine until you had been shipped out to Aqtabi. You’d tried to keep it up while you were in the field, remembering what day was which, but the truth was that sometimes you had no idea if it was morning or night. Was that the sun or a flare?
And sometimes it didn’t matter. Something would happen on a mission, and Price would crawl beneath your scratchy woolen sheet, searching for the comfort of your arms, not saying a word, not even asking you if it was alright, but just taking you there in the cold night of the desert, filling you up and keeping his cock sheathed in you, safe and sound.
And sometimes you needed them, too. Waiting on exfil, huddled together in the pouring rain beneath a sad tarp, you’d crawled into Gaz’s lap, looping your arms around his neck and letting him hold you in a cradle, using his big chest as your pillow. You’d dozed, exhausted, and he’d rubbed himself against you through your clothes, coaxing you to pull down your pants so he could empty himself into your womb, quick and filthy. You remembered how it felt when his come had soaked through your panties as you sat next to him in the helicopter, letting him hold your hand.
You felt a little guilty that you weren’t exactly hoping for a child during those first few months. You were enjoying their affections, no matter how platonic they may have felt.
It didn’t stay that way, though. Soap was the worst offender. When he fucked you, he wanted to spend most of his time eating you out, sucking on your clit with his mouth like a hungry dog, soaking himself in your scent and your flavor before finally mounting you, crawling over your body like the hound that he was, dipping his cock into you and beating your core like a drum. He’d stare into your eyes when he could manage it, and he’d slipped up one day and told you he loved you. That you were his girl, his wee bonnie lass, and that he’d raise the bairn with you, even if it was Black like Gaz, tall like Ghost, or had Price’s big nose. It’d be his and yours. He’d be the daddy you wanted him to be, he promised.
Then, you’d had to deal with Gaz. He’d made dinner reservations at a restaurant near base while he had your legs held up to your chest, helping you wait the twenty suggested minutes for his “lads” to “soak in”. Told you he was just hungry, but he had also happened to buy you a nice dress, and he’d driven you in his sporty little Beamer, bright red and clean as a whistle. He’d fucked you after dinner, sneaking in a double feature, which was expressly against the rules. Told you he couldn’t help himself, and he said he’d been thinking about you all weekend, cock in hand.
Ghost was like his namesake, haunting you all over the place. He found you in the locker room, and decided to fuck you standing up, sweaty from your sparring match. He’d washed you off in the shower, and he’d taken you in there, too, after coaxing you to make him hard again by sucking him off. Ghost would slink by you in the reference room, stalking you through the bookshelves, and dragging you to the storage closet to fuck you on all fours on the floor, maps and looseleaf pamphlets about Russian spy camps under your rosy red knees. He got vocal that night, cramped with his huge body in that tiny closet, telling you what a good girl you were for him, how you fit his fuckin’ cock so perfect, how he’d never want anyone else, how it felt so good to fill your body up with his load.
Then, there was your captain. At first, you weren’t sure he was truly a willing participant. He seemed to avoid you unless he was on the schedule. He didn’t cut in line, and if you were on the couch or in the kitchen with one of the boys, he’d leave you be, smiling at you a bit before grabbing his tea and escaping back to his office. But, then you realized the truth: John Price wanted to put a baby inside of you more than anyone else, and he would go to the ends of the earth to make sure it happened.
“Hey, little bird,” John’s finger pet the side of your cheek as you woke, feeling him pull down your pink silk panties so he could start to warm you up, “I’m your Sunday.”
“Mm,” you rubbed the sleep out of your eye and opened up your legs for him, giving him full access to your body on instinct at this point, “John, we gave up on the schedule. You can come whenever you want. Or, you can stop.”
“Can’t stop,” he kissed your mouth as he leaned over you, and you tasted peppermint and tobacco mixing together with something heady and lustful, “We’re in the window.”
Ah. The Window. All of the boys talked about The Window and when it was coming up next. They’d all downloaded trackers on their phones, watching you like birds of prey for when you ordered a box of tampons, checking with you to see when you were off the rag. And then, you’d be “in the window” of ovulation. Their best chance at succeeding at this mission.
They would fuck you at any time of the month, and Soap and Price would even fuck you through your period, having read in some magazine that there was a small chance of success. But, being in The Window was like covering yourself in honey in the middle of a cave in spring and waking up all the bears inside it. Fertile ground, ripe for the taking.
“Mm, fuck,” you keened. John had two fingers in you now, pressing on your soft spots and stretching your hole. You wrapped a hand around his neck and pulled him in for another kiss, which he moaned into.
“Feel good, Spar? You want to make me hard, pretty bird?”
“Yeah,” you nodded, looking up at him with desperate eyes, “Yeah, I do. Please, John…”
He slipped himself in, half-hard already, and you felt the body of it slide into your core. It was soft, and you liked to squeeze it with your muscles, feeling him writhe inside of you when you did, reveling in his pleasure. He sat back on his heels to let you play with him fully, watching you grind your hips on him as he massaged your clit to its full, swollen height. He was in no rush, and he spoke to you casually.
“Has Kyle been in this weekend?”
“No, it was Soap,” you tried to remember, “And then Ghost, and then Soap again.”
Price chuckled warmly,
“That boy wants a baby so badly.”
You smiled with him, agreeing,
“He does. He interrupted Gaz on Thursday and asked him when he’d be done!”
Price laughed with you then, his eyes gleaming and crinkling at the edges,
“Oh, Christ. He’d be a good one. They’d all be good.”
You watched his mood shift. There was something solemn about it, and you wanted to chase it away. You rubbed your hand along his furry belly, locking your ankles around his hips and shamelessly rocking your hips to fit more of him into you. You confessed,
“You’d be good.”
His eyes found yours again and he stilled, wondering out loud,
“D’you think so, Sparrow?”
“I know so.”
“Can I tell you a secret, little bird?” He whispered, lowering himself into position and stuffing his hard length even deeper inside of you, making you worry just a bit if he could hurt you with that thing.
You nodded, kissing his huge Adam’s apple in his throat and nuzzling through his beard. He told you the whole truth as he pounded himself into you without mercy,
“Sometimes, I wish he would be mine. I wish…” He almost stopped, but he kept going, like a raft in the stream, too caught in the current to go back to the shore, “I wish you could be mine, and then I could rub lotion on your belly when you got big. And I could cook for you when you got tired, and I could read to you, even when he was still inside of you, and I know he could hear my voice. I wish, sometimes, that when it happens, that I’d be the first to know. That you’d tell me first, because you knew it was mine, because you’d want him to be mine.”
You were stunned, and you were coming, and the two were very separate events. As your pussy pulsed and tried to milk him of his come, making you dizzy and almost sick with pleasure, you were shocked by his admission. You grabbed his face and made him look you in your eyes,
“John…” You panted, coming down from your first high of many with Price, “I had no idea you felt that way.”
“I didn’t either,” he smiled, but the corners didn’t reach his eyes.
When he fucked you this morning, you had no idea how good it could feel, but he showed you. He rutted into you, desperately, like some sort of beast, unable to stop himself. It was as if he would fuck himself bloody in you if he had to, and you wanted to take him as best you could. You felt him finally start to come, and he plugged you up with his thickness, shoving himself as deep as he would go, sealing you off and keeping you warm and elevated.
He kept his cock in you, gasping for breath and petting the hair out of your face. He kissed you, cheeks and chin and neck, all the way down to your breasts where he suckled from your nipples, almost dreamlike in the way he was touching you, fully covered in you the entire time.
“Sleep, birdie,” he nuzzled your neck and continued to lave his tongue over your breasts, “I’ll wake you when I’m hard again.”
Part 2
#call of duty fanfic#cod mw2#cod mwii#captain john price#cod#john price#captain price#captain price x reader#captain price x you#captain john price smut#captain john price x reader#john price x reader#kyle gaz garrick#simon ghost riley#soap mactavish#john soap mactavish#141 x reader#task force 141#task force 141 x reader#tf 141#cod 141#mw2 141#call of duty#tf141
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got lovestruck, went straight to my head (got lovesick all over my bed) - nico hischier
universe: nico hischier x clementine sandoval (the blue au)
warnings: swearing, mentions of stuff you'd typically see in the hospital (death, etc), author has never been to switzerland (but wants to!!), fluff! angst if you squint
title: "slut!" by taylor swift
word count: 23k (originally 27k but had to be cut down bc tumblr apparently has a limit of blocks per post??? lol)
author's note: long anticipated (official) part two to this little ditty. takes place pretty much right where the first part left off and goes until january 2025. i love clem. i love clem and nico. i love this whole world, and it loves all of you right back. thanks for all the love, truly. it means so much. here are some more slice of life moments that will probably rot your teeth because they're so sweet! enjoy and please let me know your thoughts!!
~*~*~
Devils fans love Nico Hischier, Clementine realizes, as she waits in a cafe across the back entrance of The Rock, looking outside as Nico takes the time to sign things and take pictures with the fans.
To some extent, after being in Jersey for a full season now, she knows how adored he is — the multitude of 13 jerseys during every game and how she has never heard a single bad thing said about him, whether that be as a person, captain or player. But right now, she’s smiling as he thanks the fans for their support when she knows he was devastated less than 48 hours prior.
This team, their fans and this community love their captain. They’d go to the ends of the world for him, she’s convinced.
She feels her phone buzz in her pocket. She pulls it out with a smile.
Nico Hischier
Meet me at my car in 5 mins? ❤️
She smiles, just liking the text before slinging her bag over her shoulders, grabbing her half finished coffee and going back to the counter to order a cappuccino for Nico. She thanks the barista when he’s done, grabs the cappuccino and goes back down to the parking garage.
Nico’s leaning against his car on his phone, but puts it away when he sees her walking to him. She shuffles over quickly and gives him a quick kiss. She doesn’t think she’ll get used to that.
“Hi.”
“Hey.” The fondness tinged at the short greeting isn’t new, Clementine knows now, but it makes her smile all the same. “Thanks for the coffee. Sorry I took so long,” he says, taking his coffee and opening the passenger door.
“You’re good,” she slides in and waits for him to get to the driver’s seat. “You doing alright?”
He starts the engine and looks over at her with a soft smile. “Yeah.”
“You sure?”
He reaches over to give her thigh a comforting squeeze after backing out. ‘I’m sure. I promise. Play some music.”
“Do you even like my music?”
“I listen to anything. You know that.”
She chuckles, plugging in her phone. “They love you.”
“Hm?”
“The fans. I was watching outside the windows of the cafe.”
He shrugs. “They’re always great. Have been good to me since I came into the league and have stuck by us.”
She looks at him thoughtfully. “They also have nothing but respect for their captain, who led them through the season extraordinarily well despite all the downs.” She leans her head on his arm for a few seconds. “I know it’s hard, but try not to blame yourself too much. You can’t and shouldn’t carry all that weight. The boys know that. The fans know that.”
He nods and looks over at her with a smile. “Gotten good at that throughout the years, hey? Comforting people after big losses.”
“Tell me about it.” She thinks back to when Quinn and Jack lost the gold medal match in 2019 at World Juniors and both times Luke’s dream of winning a national championship with Michigan fell short. And those are just the ones she can think of off the top of her head. “I’m serious though. It’ll come for you guys. I know it will.”
“Thanks, Schätzli.” Oh. That’s also a new development. The first time it slipped out, Nico had almost taken it back with wide, panicked eyes. But Clementine had promptly pulled him down to kiss her.
The team all chipped in to rent out a rooftop bar in Tribeca tonight to celebrate their season, the multitude of birthdays that occurred during the last part of the season that they couldn’t really celebrate at the time, and to just hang out before people start dispersing for the off-season. Therefore, Clementine purposefully volunteered for the overnight shift the day before and took a four hour nap before she tagged along to locker cleanout. She hid out in the cafe while they all had to do their end-of-season duties.
But they have a few hours to kill before heading into Manhattan, so the new couple spend the afternoon at Liberty State Park, enjoying the rare instance since the night of their first kiss where they’ve both been free. Clementine’s packed a small cooler with some tiny sandwiches, fruit and small bottles of wine. Nico lays out a blanket and Clementine toes off her sandals. It’s beautiful outside, and after she’s done munching on the food, she finds herself laying her head in Nico’s lap as he plays with her hair, talking about everything and nothing. Occasionally he just leans down to place a kiss on her forehead or cheek and she feels her throat closing up everytime at the sweetness of the gesture.
They have limited time before Nico heads back home to Switzerland. She’ll take all the moments she can get.
“Can I ask you something?”
“Uh oh,” she jokes. “Should I be nervous?”
“No, no, no. It’s just..maybe a bit of a weird question.”
“Nico. I deal with kids on a daily basis. And other residents who have no sense of boundaries. And Jack and Luke where all social cues are nonexistent. Almost nothing fazes me at this point.”
“Well, of course I’ve seen you around Jack and Luke so I know what your relationship is like with them. But how are you with Quinn?”
“Huh. Why do you ask?”
Nico twirls a piece of her hair around his finger. “They’ve mentioned a couple of times how I remind them of Quinn sometimes, which you know, I think is a compliment. I respect Quinn a lot as a player and he did a great job captaining that team this year. But, I don’t know. I’m just curious.”
Clementine smiles easily. “Luke’s my baby and Jack’s like the most annoying little brother you could ask for, but yeah. Quinn is..he’s also like a little brother, but he’s also my best friend. I think Quinn and I are the most similar in terms of how we think. So I guess that leads to a sense of…understanding? Like, on a different level than with Luke and Jack. And if you think I’m protective of Jack and Luke, I’m probably even worse with Quinn. He’s just always so busy looking after the other two that he sometimes forgets he needs to look out for himself too.”
“Then who looks after you?”
“Hm?”
“If you’re busy looking after those three, who looks after you?”
She sits up as he lets her hair fall from his fingers. She plops a strawberry in his mouth. “I don’t need anyone to look after me.”
“Those three don’t need anyone to look after them.” He points out.
“Lies. You think Luke and Jack are annoying now? They were ten times worse before. And you think Luca and Nina don’t still feel a responsibility to look after their little brother? I haven’t even met them and I think I know the answer.” She shrugs, hooking her chin on his shoulder. “I don’t mind, really. They also, in a way, look after me as well, especially as we’ve gotten older. But I don’t think I answered your question. I guess you’ll have to see Quinny and I together and see for yourself.”
He hums, kissing her forehead twice. “You gotta take some time to look after yourself too. You’re no use to them if you don’t.”
“I know. I think I’ve managed the balance well. And you’re partially right. I don’t need to look after them as much anymore, especially since now Quinny has a girlfriend who I still haven’t met and you look after Jack and Luke plenty.”
Nico snorts. “I’m sure you’ll get to meet Quinn’s girlfriend this summer.”
“If the fucker answered my calls, that would be a start,” she says. “Are you all packed to go yet?”
“Not at all.”
He literally leaves in two days. “God, you all really are the same breed. I bet I could pack all your shit in an hour. Maybe even less.”
He smirks. “Is that a challenge?”
“No. Pack your own stuff. You’re a grown man.”
He laughs, and they switch positions. Now his head is in her lap and she’s running her hand through his hair. She’s still learning things about Nico, but she’s pretty sure that he likes her playing with his hair more than she likes him playing with hers. He clears his throat. “And, um, I don’t need to pack yet. I’m staying in Jersey a bit longer.”
“Yeah? How much longer?”
“Like, June 7? So what is that..three weeks?”
She blinks. “Nico, I don’t-”
“This has nothing to do with you,” he says, before grimacing. “That’s not what I mean. It actually has a lot to do with you. But it was my choice. I’m in no rush to get back, in terms of training and all that. Plus, a bunch of the guys are staying for a bit too. And I want to spend time with you, because I do have…what did you say? ‘Impeccably shit timing.’”
“I just want to make it clear that you don’t have to stay just for me,” she assures softly. “I know you miss home and I understand the importance of an off season.”
He looks up at her earnestly, “Spending time with you is also important to me.”
Her heart soars as she traces his lips with her thumb. He catches her hand and kisses her knuckles. “Well, I’m not gonna complain about that.”
The rooftop bar that night is a fun time, even if she feels very much out of her tax bracket. She chats with pretty much everyone, much more comfortable than she was at the start of the season. People egg her on to share childhood stories of Jack and Luke, which she has plenty of. And even if they both groan and act embarrassed, she knows they love it. The drinks are plentiful and she likes seeing everyone let loose the way they can’t during the season. She’s sure the team is still disappointed from their season to some extent, so it’s nice to see them all smile and laugh and generally have a good time.
At some point in the night, she’s sitting by herself for some space, admiring the skyline with a ginger ale in her hands, taking a break from the alcohol she’s consumed tonight.
“Social butterfly finally tired out?”
She looks up to see Jack, cheeks flushed and hair adorably tousled, staring down at her. She scooches over to offer him a seat. “A bit. It just hit me that I’m running on four hours of sleep.”
He snorts, sitting down. “Yeah, that’ll do it.” He tucks himself into her side like he used to do as a kid, taking her arm and using it as a pillow. “We still on for dinner tomorrow? Just me, you and Lukey?”
“Of course. I gotta get my fix in before you all leave me to hang with all your friends.”
Jack shoves her lightly. “We’re literally staying in Jersey until the end of the month. Or the Northeast, at least.”
“Okay, and Trevor literally flies in in two days. And then you and Luke’s friends are gonna rotate in and out. I’ll be lucky if I get a second of quiet at the apartment.”
Jack laughs, but then a worried look crosses his face. “I told them that under no circumstance can they enter your room without your permission. I don’t want them being here to fuck up your schedule.”
She waves him off. “It’s fine, Jack. I promise. Besides, I’ll just hide out at Nico’s if I need. Did he tell you that he’s staying a bit longer?”
His smirks. “He did. Mom invited him to spend the long weekend with us up in New Hampshire.”
“He didn’t mention that.”
“Probably because I literally just told him an hour ago when Mom texted me. You know this means he’s gonna be meeting Maeve, right?”
She blinks. “Shit, yeah. A bit soon, no?”
To her surprise, instead of agreeing or making fun of her, Jack just shrugs. “I don’t think so. You and Nico are the real deal.”
Her mouth drops open a bit in shock. “Oh.”
Jack just shoots her an award-winning grin. “And Maeve is gonna love him.”
That, Clementine thinks, is most definitely true,
As they drive home, she’s in the passenger seat with Luke and Jack in the back, quietly dozing off. Nico’s hand is on her thigh as she’s queuing songs up on her phone. Even after living in the city for almost a year now, she still finds herself in awe at the NYC skyline, especially on the rare chance she gets to see it from the angle of leaving the city in a car this late. Her attention is brought elsewhere when she feels a squeeze on her thigh. She looks at Nico and smiles.
(It’s hard to not smile when she looks at Nico)
“You have fun?” He asks softly, careful not to disturb the brothers in the back.
“Lots,” she responds. “Thanks for having me.”
“Of course,” he says. “I think there would have been an uproar if you hadn’t come. Everyone loves having you around.”
“Jack told me you’re invited to Memorial Day weekend celebrations in New Hampshire.”
“Yeah. It was sweet of Ellen to invite me. It’ll be fun to experience a classic summer weekend out here.” He suddenly looks at her, worried. “That’s okay, right? I don’t wanna intrude.”
“What? Of course it’s fine. It’s gonna be a chill weekend with good food and a lot of sun. You know you’re gonna be meeting my mom, right?”
“Is that a problem? Moms usually like me. Ellen likes me, I think.”
Clementine rolls her eyes. “No, I just, as long as you know.”
Nico looks over at her. “Your mom’s clearly important to you and raised a beautiful woman. I’m excited to meet her.” She swallows roughly. Nico changes topics easily. “Have you figured out your plans for the summer? How much vacation time do you have?”
“Not much. Maybe, like, two weeks at most. I’m still trying to figure it out. The boys invited me to Michigan, which would be fun. I haven’t been back there for a bit. Some of my friends from med school are going to meet back up in California at some point.”
“Two very different options.”
“Yeah. I probably need to figure it out soon though so I can request the leave.”
“Have you thought about Switzerland?”
She’s looking out her window, so she doesn’t see the hesitant but honest look on his face. “Showing me your hometown already, Cap?” She jokes
“If you want.” She whips her head to look at him. Oh. He’s serious. He backtracks. “I-I get if you think it’s too soon, but you’ve mentioned that you wanna go back. And I could show you around. Or we could go to other places in Europe too. I-I feel bad that I’m about to leave when we haven’t gotten quality time together which I know is partially my fault-”
She pushes her chin into his arm, looking up at him as he briefly looks down at her before focusing back on the road. “You’d be okay with that? Me coming to your hometown?”
“Why wouldn’t I be?”
“We just started dating officially..what, like a month ago? Not even?” She looks to the backseat to ensure that Jack and Luke are still asleep, or are at least faking it to give them some sort of privacy. They are. She turns back around. “I don’t…I just don’t want you to feel like you- I-you’re really important to me,” she admits with a swallow. “I don’t wanna mess it up by moving too fast.”
“You’re not messing anything up,” Nico takes her hand and kisses the back of it. “I’m not gonna push you. It’s ultimately your decision. But I would absolutely love to show you around where I grew up and spend more time together.”
“Can I think about it?”
“Of course,” he assures. “Take all the time you need.”
She leans to kiss his cheek.
…..
“Switzerland?” Luke practically screeches. “To introduce you to his family?”
Clementine rolls her eyes, sliding him a glass of orange juice across the counter. Trevor giggles into his coffee and without looking, she smacks the back of his head.
“Switzerland because it’s beautiful and to spend time with my boyfriend,” Clementine says pointedly.
“Go frolic in Europe with your new boyfriend,” Trevor grins. “You deserve it. Jacky tells me you’re barely home.”
“I’m trying to become a doctor, Trev. I signed up for not having a life.”
“Exactly, which is an even better reason to go visit your hot boyfriend in Europe.” Jack and Luke give their old friend a weird look. Trevor just shrugs. “What? Your captain’s a good looking guy, and you’re delusional if you think differently.”
“I don’t care if Nico is the hottest person in the world. He’s kissing my sister. I don’t know if I’ll ever get used to that.” Luke says with a wrinkled nose.
Jack chuckles, ruffling his little brother’s hair. “Well, get used to it, Moose. And it’s kinda our fault. I mean, we’re the ones who wanted this all season. It’s fucking hilarious that they decided to start a relationship when they did though.” He comes up behind Clementine and pokes her side, rinsing his plate before putting it in the dishwasher. “Z’s right. You should go. Even if that means you wouldn’t be able to come to Michigan.”
“Aw, Clemmy’s missing the Michigan trip again?” Trevor whines. “Nevermind. Fuck your boyfriend.”
“I haven’t been to Michigan in three years so I don’t know what you’re whining about,” Clementine snorts. “And you can’t get rid of me that quickly. Especially because I, you know, live here and y’all are going to be around for who knows how long.” She taps Trevor’s phone on the counter to check the time. “Alright, I gotta head to the hospital. See you guys later.”
“Bye!”
“Love you.”
“See you tonight? What time will you be back?”
“11? Midnight the latest,” she grabs her pasta salad lunch from the fridge into her tote bag. “Have fun. Call if you need me. The usual.”
“Be safe,” Jack calls out. She clicks the door shut.
Her phone buzzes in her hand. She laughs out loud.
Quinny Hughes
Heard you’re going to Switzerland?
She rolls her eyes. It’s nice to know the brothers’ group chat is still as active and rapid as ever.
Clementine Sandoval
all three of you are actually the worst
and i’m older than all of you don’t be trying to parent me
Quinny Hughes
So you are going.
At least get us some good chocolate then.
Clementine Sandoval
lol i miss you
did you ever figure out if you’re coming to nh for memorial day?
it’s literally in two days i hope you have an answer
Quinny Hughes
Yeah I am. Especially now that you aren’t coming to Michigan this summer. Jack and Luke get to see you all the time it’s my turn.
And I’ll get to interrogate your new boyfriend.
Clementine Sandoval
sigh
are you at least bringing lauren
Quinny Hughes
Yup.
Clementine Sandoval
fantastic
finally another fucking girl
Quinny Hughes
Lol. See you soon❤️
Clementine smiles before starting her car.
…..
Two days later, Jack, Luke, Trevor, Nico and Clementine pile into Jack’s car to head up to the Hughes family’s lakehouse to spend the long weekend. She lets Luke have the passenger seat because it’s a five hour drive and he has the longest legs. Additionally, she finds great amusement in seeing Nico and Trevor interact and getting to sit in the middle of them and put her head on Nico’s shoulder and her legs over Trevor’s lap. Though, with Trevor’s constant yapping, Nico’s surprisingly unhinged stories, Jack’s loud laughter and Luke’s tendency to make a comment on everything, the drive goes by so damn slow that by the time they roll into the driveway, Clementine is practically shoving Trevor to get out of the car.
At the front door, Ellen’s laughing and Clementine rushes over to her second mother to give her a big hug.
Ellen rocks her back and forth. “It’s so good to see you, my girl.”
“You literally saw her three weeks ago?” Jack says, coming up behind them.
“Hide your jealousy better, Jacky,” Clementine teases. “It’s always good to see you, Ellen.” Jim comes up behind his wife and she beams. “Hi Jimmy!”
He laughs, wrapping her in a fatherly hug. “Hi Sunshine. El made sangria for everyone, and it’s still cold.”
Clementine lights up. “Oh amazing. I’ll grab a glass after I get my stuff.” She turns around to see Nico coming up the stairs with both his and her bags in his hands.
A knowing smile appears on Jim’s face. “Think that’s already covered.” She rushes to help him out but Nico just swats her away. Jim nods at Nico. “Good to see you again, Nico.”
“Good to see you too, Mr. Hughes,” he puts his bags down to shake Jim’s hand and hug Ellen, as Jack, Luke and Trevor clamber into the house. “Thank you both so much for having me.”
“Anytime, Nico!” Ellen beams. “And please, call us by our first names. You’re family, especially after recent developments.”
Clementine rolls her eyes as Nico immediately becomes flustered. “Really? Mom’s not even here yet.”
“Oh can you blame me, Clementine? Now I don’t have to hear Jack and Luke whine about when their sister and captain are going to get together.” Ellen says. “But I’ll be cool for now. Why don’t you show Nico up to your room and drop all your stuff off? Your mom picked up Quinn and Lauren from Logan and should be here any minute. Boys!” She calls out and Jack, Luke and Trevor magically appear and Clementine rolls her eyes. “Take your stuff up to your rooms so no one trips over your things. Trevor and Jack, you’re sharing.”
Trevor turns to Jack with a kissy face and Jack grimaces. “You and me, Jacky boy! Just like old times.”
“Get the fuck away from me,” Jack says dryly as Luke chuckles. Jack glares at his younger brother. “How come you get a solo room?”
“Because Quinn and Lauren are getting the other room.”
“And where is Maeve staying?”
“Probably in the basement so she doesn’t have to deal with all you guys.” Clementine retorts.
Jack turns to his parents. “You’re letting Clee and Nico share a room? And Quinn and Lauren?”
“We’re adults, you know?” Clementine sighs, pinching her nose. “You guys are exhausting. Move out of my way so we can get through.” She hears Nico stifle a laugh as they reluctantly clear a pathway. “Somehow they’re even more annoying during off-season than during the season,” she says as they climb up the stairs.
“It’s fine,” Nico chuckles. “It’s nice. The chaos, I mean. Tells a lot about who you are.”
“Don’t associate me with those fools,” Clementine says with no heat as she pushes open the door to the room in this house that’s always been designated as hers. “Here we are.”
Nico puts the bags down and immediately scans some of the photos framed on the wall. He ‘aww’s and she turns around to find him staring at the one of her and the boys during her UCLA graduation. “You guys are such babies here.”
“A week before Jack got drafted,” Clementine recalls fondly. “The boys surprised me. I didn’t think they were gonna come because they had so much hockey stuff going on.”
“You went to all their drafts, right?” Nico says. Clementine nods. “So of course they were there during one of your biggest moments.” Nico points to another photo of both families when they were all at this exact lake house. Her dad’s in this one. “When was this taken?”
“2013.” Clementine smiles sadly. “It was the last summer my dad came here. I know it’s one of Ellen’s favorites. Mine too.”
Nico hums, kissing her temple gently before scanning the rest of the room. It’s mostly white with some rustic elements, splashes of tan and ocean blue in the comforter and the sparse decorations. “Would I be right in assuming that this room hasn’t changed much since you were young?”
“It’s definitely cleaner,” Clementine laughs. “I know Jim and El use it as a guest room, but whenever I get the chance to come back, they say it’s mine.” There’s the sound of the front door opening and a cacophony of greetings floating through the room. She turns her body towards him and looks up at him. “Are you sure about this?”
“Well, even if I wasn’t, it’s a bit too late now, isn’t it?” He says. She pokes him in the side. He leans down to gently peck her lips twice. “Why are you so nervous? Shouldn’t I be the one who’s nervous?”
She chuckles. “Yeah, yeah. You’re right. Let’s go down.”
They walk down the stairs, Nico close behind her but not quite touching her. Clementine beams as she watches her mom hug Luke and put her hands on his cheeks before greeting Jack in the same way. She knows her mom doesn’t ever miss seeing the Devils or the Canucks when they’re playing the Bruins in Boston, but that only totals to usually only three games a season.
Clementine thinks a lot about how she sees Jim and Ellen as her parents. It’s during these moments does she remember that the boys see her mom the exact same way.
Maeve’s eyes flit up to the stairs and she raises an eyebrow. “My beautiful daughter. You look exhausted.”
Clementine snorts. “Thanks, Mom.” She descends down the last step and hugs her mother tightly, breathing in the scent that has comforted her on the best and worst days. She catches Quinn’s eye over Maeve’s shoulder as Trevor is chatting in his ear and she can’t help but grin.
Maeve pulls away and eyes Nico, a half smile on her face. “And you must be the infamous Nico.”
Nico chuckles, eyes widening momentarily as Maeve pulls him into a hearty hug. “It’s nice to meet you, Mrs. Sandoval.”
Maeve lets out an affronted noise. “None of that. Call me Maeve. You European boys and your politeness.” Clementine laughs under her breath. “It’s so nice to meet you! My daughter hasn’t mentioned how handsome you are.”
“Probably because she’s the one carrying in the looks department of the relationship.” Nico grins charmingly and Clementine feels so fucking fond.
She then begins to leave her boyfriend and her mom to converse and turns to Quinn. Time with Quinn is always scarce. She leans up to wrap her arms around his neck. “Hey Q.”
“Hey Clem.”
Clementine turns to the beautiful girl next to him. “And you must be Lauren. It’s nice to finally meet you.” She also pulls the girl into a hug. “Quinn’s been keeping you away from me.”
Quinn shoots his older sister a dirty look. “That’s not true. It’s not my fault you don’t live in California any more.”
“It’s nice to meet you too,” Lauren says softly. “Quinn’s told me so much about you. I love your pants.”
Clementine looks down at her cream flowy pants with a wide smile. “Oh thank you! You’re gorgeous. How in the world did Quinn land you?”
Lauren laughs as Quinn groans. “Clem.”
“I’m kidding!” She ruffles his hair. “Damn, let me have my fun. I don’t get to do this often. And don’t pretend that you’re not about to grill Nico this entire weekend.”
“She’s got you there,” Lauren says with a laugh.
Trevor comes up inbetween the girls. “Have you met this one yet?” Clementine asks.
Lauren nods. “I have. Kinda. Hi Trevor. Quinn’s also told me a lot about you.”
Trevor’s eyes widen as he pulls Lauren into a side hug. “Never listen to anything Quinn says about me. He’s mean to me.”
“You guys are all mean to each other,” Clementine rolls her eyes. “I don’t know what point you’re trying to make.”
Maeve claps her hands. “Out of the doorway and into the backyard, everyone! El made sangria and it’s too nice to be inside.” She picks up her bags but is swatted away by Luke, who takes the bags from her hands. Maeve kisses him on the cheek. “Thanks, honey.”
Jack rolls his eyes as they all start walking towards the kitchen. “We get it, Maeve. Luke is your favorite.” Ellen gives him a warning look as Quinn snorts.
“You know,” Maeve starts. “I was about to tell you how glad I am to see you. But with that comment, I’ll abstain.” Jack pouts and Maeve rolls her eyes but messes up his hair fondly.
Nico places his hand on Clementine’s back and leans down to mutter in her ear. “I see where you get your sass from.”
Clementine chuckles under her breath. “You gotta have some sass to deal with them. My mom’s the blueprint.”
Everyone grabs a glass of sangria before they migrate outside. Clementine finds herself sitting in between Lauren and Luke, Nico sitting by her legs with everyone else in various chairs or on the grass in some sort of circle. Clementine automatically carding her fingers though Nico’s hair as she speaks to Lauren and Quinn. She still can’t believe they’ve been dating for over a year and she’s only met Lauren now.
If she was still in California, she would’ve flown her ass to Vancouver and parked herself at Quinn’s apartment at the first chance she had.
While she’s listening in on a conversation between Nico, Quinn and Trevor, she catches both her mom and Ellen’s eyes on her. She narrows her eyes. She sees her mom not-so-subtly eyeing her hand in Nico’s hair and him leaning back against her legs.
Jack notices, looking between the two of them with a smirk. “Thoughts, Maeve?”
“Jack,” Clementine says in a warning tone. Nico squeezes her ankle in reassurance.
“I didn’t even say anything!”
Maeve chuckles, and Clementine sees her smile, the same smile that everyone says she also has. “Nothing in particular. Just thinking about how fun your time in Jersey has probably been so far.”
Clementine bites her lip, closed lipped-smile threatening to burst through the seams. “It could be worse.”
As expected, Jack rolls his eyes and Luke gives her a dirty look. “Well, what could make it better?” Luke asks.
“If you guys cooked more for me.”
Quinn looks at his brothers with a disapproving look. “You’re making Clem cook for all of you? Guys, come on. She’s busier than all of us combined.”
Jack’s jaw drops wide open as Trevor cackles. “That’s not even true! We cook for you. Just not as much because you’re just a better cook. And you always have leftovers.” Jack reaches over to whack Clementine’s shoulder. “Stop making us look like bad roommates.”
Clementine chuckles to herself. She has a lot of favorite things in life, but making fun of her brothers and throwing them under the bus has to be at the top.
Nico looks up at her and she has to stop herself from leaning down and kissing him silly. “That cake you baked me for my birthday is still the best dessert I’ve had in awhile.”
She rolls her eyes. “You’re just being nice. And, I baked another one for Jack and Luke, which circles back to my point.”
Ellen starts lightly scolding her two youngest for not cooking more and Clementine snickers as she feels Nico’s shoulders shake as he’s trying to hold back his laugh. She drops his hands from his hair and instead leans forward, wrapping her arms loosely around his neck. He automatically grabs her wrists and keeps his hands there. She places a quick kiss to the side of his head.
(Without their knowledge, Maeve catches the romantic motion. She doesn’t even bother to hide her smile.)
It’s not the first time she’s seen Nico around the people she loves, but that whole weekend, she watches him and her mom get along so well, him offer to help out Ellen and Jim for meals, him shove Trevor into the lake when he’s being an absolute pest, him sitting down with Quinn by the fire one night a bit away from everyone to talk about something that neither Quinn or Nico will tell her about so she knows it’s about her.
He slips so easily into the most important part of her life. Clementine doesn’t quite love him yet, but she’s real close.
Their last night, as they’re getting ready to sleep, Clementine's just staring at Nico from her bed as he’s in the bathroom brushing his teeth. He catches her eye in the mirror and smiles, but toothpaste dribbles down his chins causing him to curse and her to laugh.
When he climbs under the covers, she places her head on his chest. “Thanks.”
“For?”
“Coming here. I’m sure it’s a lot.”
“It’s not,” he assures gently. “Why would it be?”
She shrugs, because he’s right, in a sense. “Families are always a lot, no matter how good they are. And I know Quinn and Jimmy grilled you way more than necessary.”
“Baby,” he rubs up and down her arm. “I knew that was gonna happen as soon as I was invited here. They were more than fine. Jack and Luke’s threats were way worse.”
“They’re annoying.”
“They love you,” he says. “And they’re protective of you. I get it. I’m the same way with Nina.”
She shifts so she’s eye level with him. “About that…”
“Hm?”
“I got the okay from my supervisors to take two weeks off.”
“Oh yeah?”
“Can I still come to see you in Switzerland?” She asks, biting her lip, nervous all of a sudden.
Nico kisses her soundly. “Of course,” he mutters against her lips. “Yes. When?”
“I was thinking early July?”
“To spend your birthday?”
“If you’ll have me.”
He squeezes her exaggeratingly, making her giggle. “You’re silly. Of course. Is there anywhere you really wanna go?”
“I mean, I’ll go anywhere.”
“I can take you all around Switzerland. Give you the grand tour.”
“That sounds perfect,” she swallows before bringing up something that’s very important to her. “I’m paying half.”
Nico counters back immediately. “One third.”
She scoffs. She was prepared for this disagreement. “Half.”
“Hey,” he kisses the top of her head. “You’re coming to see me. The least I can do is handle all of that.”
“You’re housing me and taking me around. I’m paying for half.”
“Nope.”
“Nico. I am perfectly capable of paying for myself.”
“You pay for your own plane tickets and I got the rest.”
“I pay for my own plane tickets and meals and then you got the rest.”
“Schätzli. Let me take care of it, yeah? I want to. And I’m perfectly capable of doing so.”
“I don’t want you to think I’m a gold digger,” Clementine says with a bit of a whine, making Nico snort.
“I know you’re not a gold digger. If you were, you’d actually let Jack pay for you more. You know he makes more than I do, right?”
“Weird flex.”
“You pay for your plane tickets and some meals,” he compromises. “Save the rest up for something else. Buy Luke a new suit for his birthday or something.”
She chuckles. “He does need one.”
“Exactly.”
Clementine lets out relenting a sigh. She’ll just have to sneak her card in here or there. “Okay.”
“Okay?”
“Yeah. I just really don’t want you to think I’m mooching off you or anything.”
“I’ve never thought of it like that at all, I promise,” he assures. She settles back against his chest again. “I’m so excited for you to come.”
“I hope your family doesn’t hate me.”
“They won’t.” And he says it so confidently that she has to believe him. “No one could hate you. Besides, Nina’s been dying to meet you and Luca wants to know the ‘girl who’s voluntarily dealing with my shit.’”
She laughs, turning to shut off the lamp. “Still. You’re their baby brother.”
He pouts. “I’m not a baby.”
She rolls her eyes. “I’m convinced.” She yawns, tossing a blanket over them both. “We should sleep. Gotta have energy to deal with the hooligans in the car tomorrow.”
He laughs, kissing her forehead. “Goodnight.”
*****
Clementine offers to drive Nico to the airport before she goes to the hospital, even though he tries to vehemently fight her on it. Clementine ultimately wins the argument, wanting to spend as much time as possible before he leaves.
“It’s only a month,” she reminds him as she kills the engine at the curbside of the departure terminal at Newark Liberty International Airport, biting her lip to also assure herself.
He leans over the console to kiss her sweetly. “I know,” he murmurs against her lips. “That’s a long time though.”
She runs a hand through his hair. He leans into it instinctively. “I’ll be there with you before you know it. You’ll be having too much fun catching up with family and friends to even think about me.”
“Not true.” She rolls her eyes with a smile as they both climb out of the car. Nico finishes unloading his luggage from the trunk as he carries it to the curb. Clementine’s amazed that no one has yelled at them for parking by the curbside too long yet.
She wraps her arms around his neck and hugs him tightly, leaning her head on his chest and breathing in deeply, trying to memorize his scent. “I’ll miss you.”
“I miss you already,” he mutters into her hair. “I’ll call.”
“You fucking better,” she shoots back with no bite. “Have fun, okay? Enjoy your time off.”
He kisses her one more time, which turns into three more times. Clementine bites her lower lip as he backs away to try not to cry. He brushes his thumb against her cheek. “I’ll see you soon, yeah?”
She nods with a shaky smile. “Yeah. Text me before you take off.”
“Of course.” He clasps his hand on his suitcase handles and backs away with a sweet smile. “Bye, baby.”
After he walks through the doors, she promptly drives herself to the train station, music playing louder than normal to hopefully drown out her own loud thoughts. She parks to see a text from Nico saying that he’s at the gate, a horribly-angled selfie of him and a coffee he must’ve bought.
Clementine saves it.
…..
It’s only been eleven days since Nico flew back to Switzerland. They text everyday and FaceTime when the time differences allow. She always wakes up to a good morning text and a mini photo dump of pictures he’s taken that day. Sometimes they’re of the beautiful sights of Bern or Naters or wherever he is. Sometimes they’re literally just a picture of his toast for breakfast. But they’re nice to receive. And at his urging, she sends similar photo dumps back. His favorites are the selfies she takes at work. Bonus points if she’s wearing the scrubs he got her for Christmas.
She goes to the hospital. She spends sporadic time with Quinn, Jack, Luke and other stragglers who show up at the apartment before they all head back to Michigan or wherever else. Nico relaxes with his friends and family.
She misses him like a limb.
…..
Clementine’s phone rings as she’s sipping on her coffee while sitting at a cafe by the hospital. She raises an eyebrow when she sees who’s calling.
“Quinn. Hey.”
“Hi Clem. Are you busy?”
“You have me for about 15 minutes. What’s up?” She hears a sniffle and immediately she sits up straighter. “Quinny? Is everything okay?”
“Lauren and I broke up.”
She squeezes her eyes shut. “Fuck. Oh Quinn, I’m so sorry. When did this happen?”
“Earlier this morning. She-she called it off. Over the phone.”
“Over the phone?” Clementine tries to level her voice and judgment. “Wasn’t she just in Michigan?”
“She left last week.”
“Fuck, Quinn. How are you feeling?”
“I just, I’m just really sad, I guess. And a bit confused.” She gives him a moment to think. “I know she was voicing concerns about the distance and stuff, but we had talked about it and I thought we had come to a conclusion. I guess we left that conversation feeling very differently.”
Clementine picks at her nails, “What was her reasoning? Did she have any?”
“She said the distance wasn’t worth it anymore.” Quinn trails off and Clementine puts it together, her heart breaking for him as she finishes the thought for him.
That Quinn wasn’t worth it anymore.
Clementine grinds her teeth together. “Fuck her,” she says. “I know that’s not what you want to hear right now, but I’m serious. What the fuck? She just suddenly decided that after dating for over a year that she couldn’t do it anymore?”
“Yeah. I’m confused about that too. When she was talking and explaining her reasoning over the phone I was just, like, shell-shocked. I think I froze. She was bringing up things that she hadn’t ever brought up before and I don’t know, it just felt like she had made the decision to break up with me before I even picked up the phone. It wouldn’t have mattered what I said.”
“That’s shitty, Quinny. How unfair.”
“I mean,” she knows he’s shrugging on the other side of the phone. She wishes she could hug him. “I know I wasn’t the perfect boyfriend and there were underlying issues, but I-I tried my best.”
“I know, Quinn. I know,” Clementine sighs. How do you comfort one of your best friends through heartbreak when you can’t actually be there? “Q, I’m so sorry. I have to head back to work, but I’ll call you tonight, okay?”
“Oh. That’s okay. You don’t have to. Thanks for listening anyways.”
“I’ll call you back tonight. I promise. I love you. Hang in there.”
“Thanks, Clem. Love you too.”
Clementine manages to do one thing she does very well, which is push something out of her mind and focus on the task at hand. The second she clocks out of the hospital, on her commute back to Hoboken, she thinks through how she wants to talk this through with Quinn. It’s not her first time talking someone through a break-up, so she’s learned a few tricks and phrases here and there. Like most things, it just comes with repetition.
But this is also Quinn. Her best friend. All her previous experience might not work and might not even matter.
She calls him as soon as she finishes her shower. She lets him talk for over two hours to the point where she has to adjust her position on the couch to be near an outlet so her phone can charge.
There’s nothing really to say in a situation like this, as Quinn details what sounds a lot like heartbreak. She wishes she was in Michigan and could give him the tightest hug. Watching and hearing his sniffles through the phone has her throat closing up and all she can do is listen.
But as she climbs into her bed that night, she lets out a breath. She’s sure it hurts so much now, but Quinn will find a way.
He always does.
…..
Clementine’s phone reads 6:28 a.m. local time when she lands in Zurich. She yawns as she watches the plane taxi to their gate, Taylor Swift’s “august” playing softly in her ears. Somehow, the two seats next to her were empty so she had her own row the whole flight, meaning she got to go up and pee without bothering a single person.
She turns on her phone, and texts the chat with the Hughes / Sandoval families that she’s landed, before thumbing over to her thread with Nico. He sent a text eight minutes ago.
Nico Hischier
At the arrivals area. Can’t wait to see you ❤️
Clementine Sandoval
just landed!!! can’t wait to squeeze you
Immigration and customs goes quickly, even if Clementine finds herself tapping her foot in line. She can already feel the heat of the Switzerland summer air seeping into her skin and she tugs off her sweatshirt, happy that she has a t-shirt underneath. Once she grabs her luggage from the carousel, she takes a deep breath, wheeling her suitcase through to the arrivals hall. Her eyes dart around to try and spot her boyfriend. It doesn’t take long.
The grin spreads on her face when she sees Nico. He’s wearing an olive green t-shirt that’s seen better days and dark jeans topped off with those scuffed up Nikes that he always seems to wear.
He’s holding a bouquet of wildflowers wrapped in newspaper, the sweetest smile peeking over. Clementine feels her heart threatening to burst out of her chest.
She almost knocks her suitcase over as she throws her arms around him. She feels him chuckle and place a kiss on the side of her head. “Hi Schätzli,” he says softly.
“Hi,” she pulls back and kisses him. But they’re both grinning too much to kiss properly. She holds his cheeks in her hand, happy to just be around him after a month. “I’ve missed you.”
“Missed you more,” he grins. “You look so beautiful.”
Clementine snorts because her Stanford t-shirt tied with her hair tie in the front and the black leggings with her Adidas definitely scream ‘I’ve been on a transatlantic flight and I need to shower.’
“I look like I just was on a plane for 8 hours,” she says dryly.
“Beautiful,” Nico says firmly as he takes the backpack off her shoulders and grabs her suitcase, giving her the flowers to hold. “For you”
She sniffs the flowers and smiles. “Thank you. You didn’t have to get me these. They’re so pretty.”
“You’re so pretty,” he replies simply. That’s twice in 30 seconds. He turns to look at her again as they walk out to the parking lot. “I’m so happy you’re here.”
“Thank you for driving all this way. I know it’s early and far.”
“Of course. I just want to see you.”
It doesn’t feel like it’s been a month as Nico starts the drive to Bern to his sister’s place where they’re staying for a few days. The sun’s high in the sky despite the early hour, and Clementine happily sips on the coffee and munches on the croissant Nico had graciously gotten her. They catch up on each other’s weeks like they have been over the phone when they’ve been almost 4,000 miles apart. They talk about the teenager who recognized Nico the other day when Nico and his friends were playing a game of pick-up soccer and how they all played until sundown and Clementine having to step in to assist in a higher than average number of surgeries the last month, as well as having to work the Fourth of July. She holds his hand the entire time and both of them can’t seem to stop the smile from spreading across their lips.
She’s here. In the most beautiful country. With the most wonderful person.
“How are you feeling?” Nico asks. “Are you really tired?”
“I’m okay.” She yawns. “Even if I am, I’m not sleeping until at least 9 tonight. I’m not wasting time here by being jetlagged and sleeping at weird times.”
Nico laughs. “Fair. But it’s okay if you’re tired for a few days. I always am.”
“No wasted time,” she says, poking his shoulder on every word.
“If you say so,” he grins. “My mom’s making a huge breakfast for us when we get back and everyone’s excited to meet you.”
Suddenly, Clementine is nervous again. “She didn’t have to do that.”
“She wanted to,” he assures. “I haven’t brought a girl back home in…ever, really. They’re probably more excited to meet you than you are to meet them.”
“No pressure at all,” she says dryly.
He looks over at her and squeezes her hand. “You’ll win them over in minutes.” Clementine hums before Nico continues. “If Jack could somehow have them all liking him in a day, you’re gonna be perfectly fine. You’re all the best parts of him and more anyways.” She reaches over to fix a strand of his hair and she wants to smirk at the light blush that paints his cheeks. He clears his throat, “I was thinking of taking it easy today, just walking around the town and exploring the area a bit. And then dinner at my favorite place in town?”
“Sounds perfect to me.”
“I can’t believe you’re here,” he says breathily. “I, just…I can’t believe it.”
She grins, rubbing the sleep out of her eyes. “Well believe it, pretty boy.”
(His stomach flips at being called ‘pretty boy.’ She hasn’t said that one yet. Two months after they’ve officially started dating and he still feels like a teenage boy with the biggest crush on the prettiest girl in school)
They pull up to Nina’s place and Clementine feels like she’s in a dream. Bern is beautiful everywhere you look. It’s almost like she’s in a picture book of a fairytale. She stretches and rises on her tiptoes to kiss Nico on the cheek to thank him for grabbing her luggage. She tugs at his t-shirt and he stops to turn to her, momentarily confused. She just wrap her arms around his waist again, wanting to feel him before they’re surrounded by his family. He chuckles, rubbing her back and kissing the top of her head three times.
As they’re walking up the steps to the front door, it swings open as Katja, Nico’s mother, beams. “You guys made it! Hello!”
Clementine can’t help but smile back. “Hi,” she shifts the flowers so that she can shake Katja’s hand, but Katja doesn’t bother and just wraps her into a hug. “It’s so nice to meet you, Mrs. Hischier. Thank you so much for having me.”
“Thank you for coming all this way,” Katja’s eyes shift to Nico, who’s a few steps behind with Clementine’s luggage. “Nico tells us good things.”
She chuckles and ducks her head. “I think your son is a bit too nice to me.”
“Ignore her, Mama,” Nico says as they all walk into the house. “The only person who doesn’t know she’s the best is herself.”
There’s footsteps coming down the stairs. Clementine’s met immediately with Nina’s smile. It’s the exact same as her mother and her brother’s and she is absolutely stunning. Luca is behind his sister as well with a matching grin. And Rino, who Clementine suddenly realizes is where Nico gets so many of his facial features from, just stands to the side with a small smile.
“You’re here!” Nina exclaims. Nico says something quick in Swiss German which Nina rolls her eyes at before she pulls Clementine into a tight hug. “It’s so nice to meet you, Clementine. We’ve heard so much.”
“Yeah,” Luca echoes. “I’ve never seen Nico so excited about someone.”
Nico groans and Clementine hugs Luca with a giggle before nudging her boyfriend. “He’s not so bad either.” She turns to shake Rino’s hand. “It’s nice to meet you, Mr. Hischier. Thank you for having me.” Rino shakes her hand with a warm smile before Nico pinches her side and pulls her closer.
“Okay, breakfast is almost ready!” Katja claps her hands. “Nico, why don’t you show Clementine to your room? Luca and Nina, come help me finish up. Oh! I can take those flowers from you. Did Nico get you those?”
Clementine giggles as she hands them over. “He did.”
Katja pats Nico’s cheek in such a motherly way that it makes Clementine’s heart ache in the best way. “I did raise a sweet one.”
Nico groans. “Mama.” Clementine makes eye contact with Nina and they both burst out laughing. “Come on. You can take a quick shower and then we’ll come back down.”
Clementine shoots a quick grin at Katja, Rino, Nina and Luca before following Nico upstairs. She decides to jump into the shower quickly and rinse off, partially to wake her up, mostly to wash the grime of the plane off of her. Nico’s sitting on the bed scrolling through her phone when she comes back out, hair wet and dressed in a light sweater and linen shorts.
“The fact that there’s a window in the shower looking over the mountains is so unfair,” she says, combing her fingers through her wet hair.
Nico chuckles. “Pretty, hey?”
“Very,” she yawns. “Come on. Don’t wanna leave your family waiting.”
Breakfast is absolutely delicious and filled with warm conversation, mainly filled with the Hischier family asking Clementine questions about herself, which she happily answers inbetween way too much bread, butter and coffee. Nico tries to intercept a few times (“This isn’t an interrogation, Luca”) but she just waves him off. It’s not like she likes talking about herself, but when being surrounded by people everyday who know the ins and outs of her career, it’s refreshing to have people take interest in what she does who don’t work in the medical field at all.
After breakfast, Clementine and Nico venture into the town and Clementine is all smiles. The sun is out but it’s not too hot where she aches for shade like she does back in the US. She had changed into a dress after breakfast and doesn’t regret it, resisting the urge to twirl around the streets. It doesn’t hurt that Nico looks at her in a way that makes her giddy.
As they’re walking through the scenic old town, it’s obvious how relaxed Nico is. Away from New Jersey and the expectations that come with being the captain of the sole professional sports team from Garden State, Nico looks like every other guy in his mid twenties. It’s not like he isn’t happy in New Jersey, but there’s something freeing in the way he walks, his shoulders free from the weight he carries during the season.
They walk in the sun leisurely, stop by a few shops that look interesting to Clementine and grab coffee and pastries from a cafe that Nico apparently frequents often, judging by how friendly he is with the staff. She hasn’t really gotten to hear Nico speak his native language that often so she enjoys hearing him switch so effortlessly.
“You look happy,” Nico comments as they’re taking a break and sitting on a bench to people watch.
She tears her eyes away from an adorable family to meet Nico’s warm, brown eyes. “Do I?”
“Yeah.”
“Well, I am. Are you?”
He presses a kiss to her temple and she leans her cheek against his shoulder. “Very much so.”
“Did I pass the test?” She teases. “Your family doesn't hate me?”
“Stop,” he says with a smile. “They love you. I can tell. I think my mom fell in love with you the second you talked about growing up with the boys.”
“Really?”
“She has a soft spot for sibling relationships. She always tells us how she’s glad me, Luca and Nina get along so well.”
“They’re great, by the way, your family,” she says. “Much less chaotic than mine, which is definitely a good thing. But really, really cool. I…” She trails off at the sight of a stray soccer ball.
Nico’s eyebrows furrow before he follows her eyeline. He chuckles and gets up, holding out a hand for her. “Come on. Let’s do some passing.”
She lights up at the idea of passing around a ball with the mountains in the background on a fairly large, grassy area. The most picturesque image you could find, she thinks. She takes his hand and scurries over, getting her feet familiar with the ball as he backs away a few feet.
They start some basic passing as they’re mindful of the fact that she’s wearing a dress. Clementine never saw soccer as more than a form of exercise in her youth, but she sometimes wishes she had time to join a rec league or something of that level in college and afterwards. The few people she keeps in touch with still in Toronto are mostly thanks to her club soccer days.
She’s definitely rusty, but it’s good to go through the familiar motions again. She wrinkles her nose when Nico pulls off an impressive move. “This is unfair. Are you good at every sport?”
He just shrugs modestly, before passing the ball back to her. “I definitely don’t look at ease with this ball on my feet like you do. How long did you play for?”
“Like, over 10 years?” She executes some footwork and smiles in satisfaction. “Played pretty intensely all the way up until I was 18.”
“I can tell,” he smiles. “My dad would be impressed.”
She snorts. “Don’t be ridiculous. I was never good enough to play at the collegiate level, much less professional.”
“It’s interesting that you do that.”
She stops the ball with her foot. “Do what?”
“Downplay your achievements.”
Clementine blinks a few times. “What do you mean?” But she knows exactly what he means.
Nico lets out a light snort, “You know what I mean. You’re probably the smartest and most interesting and talented person I’ve ever met. Even when you were talking to my family about your residency, you were talking about it like it isn’t a big deal. But it is a big deal. And it’s really fucking cool. And you’re so smart and quick and…I don’t know. I wish you would show off more, even though I know that’s not your style.”
She smirks. “You want me to show off?” Without waiting for an answer, she concentrates on the ball at her feet and looks up at the goal. She dribbles the ball a few seconds before striking it in the top right corner. She huffs, satisfied that she didn’t whiff it, laughing as Nico tackles her and lifts her up in a hug.
The next two days are spent in Bern, as Clementine fights the jetlag while her camera roll fills up. The Hischier siblings bring her around and she just soaks up the sunshine, views, and attractions. She especially loves flowing down the river on boats like the most seamless lazy river that just runs through the city, because you can’t really get that in the US. Nico continues bringing her around to his favorite hidden spots and to his favorite shops and restaurants, all with his hand in hers and the most beautiful smile on his face.
After Clementine says goodbye to Katja and Rino, the four of them take two cars to Zurich, Luca and Nina staying with friends while her and Nico rent out their own place. They arrive at a beautiful, spacious apartment that overlooks the center of Zurich. Clementine’s birthday is tomorrow and she has no idea what the plan is because she trusted Nico when he said he would handle it, but she’s a planner, so she can’t help but bring it up as they’re relaxing before heading out for dinner.
“Nico?”
“Yeah?” He calls out from the bathroom.
“Can you give me a hint on what we’re doing tomorrow?”
He peeks his head out of the bathroom with a smile. “I was wondering when you were gonna ask.”
She shrugs. “I trust you. But you know I’m nosy.”
Nico chuckles. “Yeah,” he comes out of the bathroom and takes his phone out of his pocket. Once unlocked, he tosses it at her. He’s lucky she has okay reflexes.
She raises an eyebrow at him before looking at his phone. Immediately, she gasps and drops the phone as it lands on the carpet on the floor. “Nico.”
“Yeah?”
“Nico,” she repeats, breathless. “You’re joking.”
“I’m not.”
“Taylor Swift? How long have you had these? How did you even get them?”
He comes over to sit on the arm of the sofa. “Nina’s a big fan. When you said you were gonna coming here for your birthday, she mentioned that Taylor Swift was gonna be in town at the same time. I pulled a few strings.”
She picks up the phone and swipes through the tickets, shellshocked. “Seven tickets?”
“Me, you, Nina, one of her friends, Luca and two of his friends. I guess they’re all kind of my friends too. I hope that’s okay?” He asks, eyebrows furrowed worriedly.
“Nico, shut up. I’m gonna see my favorite artist live and I wanna meet your friends. Of course it’s okay,” she tackles him onto the couch as he laughs. “I-I can’t believe…thank you. Oh my god.”
“Good birthday present?” He jokes.
She kisses him fondly. “I don’t know how I’m gonna beat this for yours.”
“Stop,” he murmurs, deepening the kiss. “I’m supposed to ask you if you have something to wear and if not, that you and Nina can find something tonight or tomorrow morning.”
She thinks of the light pink sequin dress she had thrown into her suitcase last minute, grateful for her past self’s decision. “I think I have something, but if I see something when we’re walking around later, I’ll let you know.” She holds his face in her hands. “Thank you. Seriously. First the whole trip and then this. I’ll pay you back for the tickets as-”
“No you won’t,” he says against her lips. She pulls back and gives him an unimpressed look. “I barely paid for them. It would be unfair to ask you to. It’s your birthday. It’s my present to you.”
Let other people do things for you for once, Clem, Quinn’s voice echoes through her head. He’s said multiple iterations of it throughout the years, but this one in particular she can envision, at dinner right after the Canucks played San Jose back in her Stanford days. That was about something simpler — arguing over who was paying for dinner — but the sentiment remains the same.
“Fine. But I’m paying for everyone’s dinner tonight.”
“Of course,” he beams.
“I mean it,” she warns.
“I know.”
She slaps his shoulder with a smile. “You fucker. I can’t believe you got those tickets.”
“27 is gonna be a good year, hey?”
She launches herself into his arms.
Yeah, it is.
…..
Clementine wakes up on her birthday to Nico pressing kisses all over her face as she squeals and wiggles around. She stretches and her arm whacks him in the face, causing him to groan. She kisses him as an apology.
“Happy birthday, honey,” he says, hovering over her with a light smile. “I can hear your bones cracking already.”
“I will push you off the bed.”
“Empty threats.”
She yawns. “How much time before everyone gets here?”
“Like, two hours? Why?”
“Perfect,” she says, pulling him closer to kiss him feverishly. He lets out a soft moan and she melts into a puddle
An hour and a half later, Clementine fiddles with the coffee maker in the kitchen as everyone starts filing in. Nina is first to bounce over and gives Clementine a big hug, wishing her a happy birthday. She meets their friends and glares at Luca as he places a large bag on the table with tissue paper peeking out of it. She doesn’t need birthday presents. But it’s sweet they thought of her anyways.
After lunch at a nearby outdoor cafe that Clementine falls in love with, everyone heads back. The guys venture out to the balcony while she, Nina and Anika, Nina’s friend, quickly make some friendship bracelets and start getting ready. Clementine’s almost done curling Nina’s hair when Nico peeks his head in, lighting up at the open box of beads on the table. He scurries in to grab the supplies and takes them outside without a word.
Anika, who’s been doing Nina’s makeup while Clementine’s been doing her hair, grins. “You two are cute together.”
“Oh, thank you.” Clementine looks up to flash a quick smile before focusing on not burning Nina or herself.
“I’ve known Nico since he was a baby,” Anika says. “Always the younger one, he was chasing us all the time. Wanted to do everything we were doing. But it was Nico and he was so sweet, so we never said no.”
Clementine chuckles. “Yeah, I get that feeling. Not that my brothers necessarily wanted to do everything I did, but they were never far behind me when we were young.”
“Right,” Anika dabs the liquid blush on Nina’s cheeks. “That’s how you and Nico met, right? Your brothers play with him in New Jersey?”
“Yeah.”
Clementine’s taken aback tone must show because Nina smiles at her through the mirror. “My brother has talked about you quite a bit since he’s come back.”
That makes Clementine look down a bit abashed. “I guess they aren’t technically my brothers,” she clarifies. “I just grew up with them.”
“So like me and Nina here.”
“Yeah. Exactly like that.”
“Do you play hockey?” Anika asks, stepping back as she finishes Nina’s makeup.
Clementine snorts, spraying hairspray into Nina’s hair. “No. You do not want to see me on skates. I played soccer. Or football, I guess.”
“But you enjoy watching it?”
The conversation momentarily pauses as Clementine is ushered into the hot seat. Nina unplugs the curler and plugs in the straightener (“I want to try something”) as Anika takes a look at Clementine’s makeup products.
“I do,” Clementine says. “Enjoy watching hockey, I mean. I don’t know if that would be the same if I wasn’t so closely connected with the sport personally, but I do enjoy it. It’s more comforting now than anything.”
“I still remember the day Nico got drafted,” Nina says wistfully. “I don’t think I’ll ever forget it.”
“And I remember everyone here staying up to watch it,” Anika adds. “There were people piling into the streets after in celebration.”
Clementine grins. “Yeah, I get that. I still remember Quinn, Jack and Luke’s draft days. It’s an extremely weird moment. Like, it’s wonderful of course, but also strange?”
“That makes sense,” Nina says. “It’s really cool to see how things have turned out since then, but it’s an interesting moment for sure. Especially when you remember Nico, or in your case, Quinn, Jack and Luke, as little boys just being little boys.”
“Nico’s really happy with you, I can tell,” Anika says. “And I don’t just say that to say that. His smile looks lighter. Freer.”
“I think that just might be because he’s home.”
“It’s because of you,” Nina says in a tone that leaves room for no argument.
When she slips into her pink dress and puts the bracelets on her wrist as they’re about to head out, it hits her what’s really about to happen. She’s about to see her favorite artist. She still remembers being gifted a CD of Taylor’s debut album from her father, Teardrops On My Guitar on repeat. After the Eras Tour sold out in seconds and the resale tickets were way too high, she lost hope on ever seeing Taylor on tour, at least this go-around.
She walks down the stairs and the first thing she sees is Nico. Dressed up in a light pink button up with khaki shorts, a backwards hat placed on his head, laughter etched in the lines on his face as he converses with his friends and siblings in his native language, she swallows. He looks up as she reaches the last step and his smile turns softer. Nina’s previous words echo her mind as she easily presses against his side.
Clementine wrinkles her nose as she looks up at him. “You really do love your hats.”
“You don’t?”
“They’re fine. I just like your hair more.” Without argument, he takes his hat off and tosses it on a nearby couch. She gives him a look but he just kisses the top of her head.
The closer they reach Letzigrund, a football stadium, Luca had said, she marvels at how large it is. She’s been to large concerts before, but as they park and make their way through the gates, she’s taken aback. Nico gently tugs their hands so she doesn’t get lost in the ground as they go find their seats. Turns out Nico pulling a few strings means tickets on the floor, not too close to the action where they would get pushed but at a vantage point where they’re in the center and can see everything. She turns to look at him bewildered and he just shrugs, a wry smile playing at his lips.
She pokes him. “Best birthday present ever.”
He takes a sip of his beer casually. “I’m glad. You know I prepared for this.”
“How?”
“I’ve been listening to Taylor Swift non-stop the last month.”
“I know we haven’t been dating for a long time, but all I do is play Taylor Swift.”
“True. But I didn’t realize how many songs she actually has. And you’re probably gonna know all of them.”
“Probably,” she admits. She’s definitely the biggest fan among the group right along with Anika. “But you don’t have to know all of them to have a good time.”
“I know. I heard she puts on a good show.” They watch Yannis, one of their friends, exchange bracelets with a stranger before Nico nudges her lightly. “I’m also just, I don’t know, excited because you’re excited.”
She snorts. “You’re a sap.”
What she wants to say, really, is “I love you.” But she refrains.
Throughout the whole concert — which in itself is a highlight of her life and something she won’t ever forget — Clementine wants to tell him she loves him. When Taylor appears in her colorful, sparkly bodysuit and sings ‘Lover’ while Nico’s arms find their way around her waist as he’s standing behind her swaying them lightly, she wants to tell him. When she, Nina and Anika loop their arms around each other screaming ‘You Belong With Me’ and he simply points his phone at them with a laugh, she wants to tell him. Right before the bridge of ‘Champagne Problems,’ when he whispers a soft “wow,” eyes glued on Taylor on stage as she sings one of Clementine’s favorite songs of hers, she wants to tell him. When he quickly leaves and comes back in the middle of ‘Delicate’ with a beer for her and a water for them to share, she wants to tell him.
When ‘Long Live’ comes on and she sees his eyes light up in recognition, before he pulls his phone out to record the end — her favorite part and the fact that he knows that is something in itself — she wants to tell him. When he and the boys scream ‘22’ so incredibly out of tune and she can’t stop laughing, she wants to tell him. When she fully loses her voice screaming out ‘Illicit Affairs’ and he can’t hide his grimace at his eardrums bursting, she wants to tell him. As they both watch Anika practically collapse when the opening notes of ‘Style’ ring out — she had come into the concert blind to the setlist somehow — and Clementine can’t help but shake her hips while singing along, she wants to tell him.
When he presses a kiss on her temple multiple times during the surprise songs as she is tearing up, she wants to tell him. When Taylor closes out the show with ‘Karma’ and Nico is visibly in awe of all the colors, fireworks, confetti and overall grand finale, she wants to tell him.
She leans into his side as they walk to their cars. She loves him. They bid farewell to everyone. She loves him. When they get back to their place, they decide to rinse off the sweat and grime together and he gently rubs massages shampoo into her hair. She loves him.
As Nico falls fast asleep next to her, arm wrapped securely around her waist, she’s about to lock her phone when she sees that she has a few text messages. They’re from Nina, who has already speedily downloaded the pictures she took on her digital camera from tonight. She thumbs through them quickly, smiling at all of them.
She stops at one of her and Nico taken before the show in front of the stage. They’re both not looking at the camera but at each other. She’s in the middle of talking — about what, she can’t remember — as Nico is just smiling at her.
She looks down at the sleeping man next to her. She loves him so fucking much.
…..
(She does end up telling Nico that she loves him a few days later, as they’re weaving through a farmer’s market in Lucerne, him carrying the bags filled with fresh vegetables and other groceries that they’re using to make dinner tonight. She thinks he doesn't hear her at first, but he tugs them towards the side and drops the bags so he can cup her face in his hands and kiss her.
“You love me?” He murmurs.
“Yeah,” she whispers. “I-I know it’s soon and you don’t have to say it back-”
He shakes his head with a grin, “Shut up.” He kisses her again. “I love you, Schatz.”
“Really?” She swallows. “You’re not just saying that?”
“I love you,” he repeats firmly. “I adore you, if we’re gonna be honest. You’re getting really close to be one of the best things that Jersey has brought me.”
“Well, now you’re just being stupid. How about, oh I don’t know, your entire career?”
He picks up their bags again, tossing an arm over her shoulder. “One of the best. Love you.”
She lets out a happy sigh, momentarily leaning her head on his shoulder as the sun hits their skin)
…..
The Switzerland tour is wrapped up in the best way, in Nico’s hometown of Naters, right by the mountains. Seriously, how is one country allowed to be this beautiful? She gets to hear the stories that litter these streets, the memories associated with the air interlacing with the wind, from a man who she loves and loves her. She tries not to think about how this is the last moments they’ll have until he comes back to New Jersey in September.
The night before she takes off, they go out to dinner at a fancy enough place that Clementine’s pulling out one of her more formal dresses. The candlelight illuminates Nico reverently, his brown eyes not tearing away from her for more than 15 seconds the whole night. The attention would be overwhelming, but Clementine just lets herself sink into it.
This feeling of being loved like this? It’s new. And she’s fully aware that it’s fragile and it could crumble any minute. But not right now. Not with Nico looking at her like she’s the only person in the room.
When he drops her off at Zurich airport the next day, she hugs him for a full minute. She doesn’t cry, but there’s a pull at her heart that plants the silly idea of staying here forever just so that she doesn’t have to leave him. But she pulls away, kisses him one more time, runs a hand through his hair, before grabbing her things and walking through the automatic doors.
…..
Clementine’s about to take a shower when she hears a key click into place. Seconds later, she’s sandwiched between Jack and Luke, uncontrollably laughing. She’s missed them dearly.
Luke smacks a kiss on her cheek. Jack ruffles her hair. She scolds them about leaving their bags in the front door where anyone could trip on them.
They’re back for another season, albeit a bit early to spend their last few summer days in the city. Nico lands tomorrow. Her Google Calendar has been synched with the Devils and Canucks game schedules.
Suddenly, the heat wave that’s hit New York / New Jersey doesn’t feel so constricting anymore.
…..
She might’ve had to bribe Ben to switch shifts with her, but there was no way she was gonna miss the home opener. Even if she’s extremely tired.
Clementine somehow makes it home before Jack and Luke are due to be at the rink earlier than normal for the carpet and other things. They’re both dressed and ready to head out. It’s a reminder that if Clementine sits on her couch for even 5 minutes, she will fall asleep. So she shouldn’t do that.
Not even a minute after she shut the front door, there’s a knock. Jack calls out that it’s open and Nico walks in.
If this were a few months ago, Clementine would blame just getting back from a long day of work for her eyes literally popping open. But it’s not, and she calls the man who walked through the door her boyfriend. Yet here she is, in her scrubs with her messy ponytail and smelling of hospital, just staring.
Holy. Shit. Nico looks hot. Which, like, yeah, he always does. Clementine is well aware that her boyfriend is a very attractive man. But something about the new green three piece suit that she had helped him pick out over FaceTime when he was still in Switzerland and his hair and the overall look has her literally speechless.
Luke, like the bitch he is, takes note and just laughs. “Cat got your tongue, Clemmy?”
She finds her voice. “Fuck off.”
Nico just smirks as he hugs Jack and Luke before walking over to give her a peck, “Hi.”
“Absolutely not,” she backs away when Nico reaches for a hug. He pouts but she shakes her head. “I just worked for 12 hours in a hospital. You do not want to hug me.”
“Of course I want to hug you. I love you.”
Somewhere behind them, she hears a gag. Gags, actually. She sticks out her middle finger behind her back before leaning in to give him another kiss. “I’ll hug you after the game when I’m clean.” He ignores her and just smothers her in a hug as she squeals. He presses exaggerated kisses all over her face as she tries to slither out of his hold. “Stop!” She breathes out in between laughs. “I’m literally so gross.”
“You’re beautiful.”
“Can you two not?” Luke deadpans.
The couple both roll their eyes. “This is nothing,” Clementine retorts.
“I know, which makes it worse.”
Jack snorts as he grabs his water bottle and keys. “You two ready to go? We’re cutting it close.”
“Yeah,” Nico tosses Jack his eyes. “You guys go down first. I’ll be a second.”
Jack looks between his captain and sister with a subtle glare. “Five minutes.”
“We are older than you,” Clementine retorts. Jack rolls his eyes before exaggeratedly blowing a kiss to Clementine. She scoffs but blows him and Luke a kiss as they walk out the front door. “They’re annoying.”
Nico chuckles, before brushing a stray piece of her hair behind her ear. “How was your day?”
“Fucking brilliant,” she deadpans. “You can’t tell by my messy hair and eye bags?”
His eyebrows furrow. “If you’re too tired to come to the game, you don’t-”
“Don’t even finish that sentence. I’m not missing the home opener. Are you insane? I’ll be good after a shower and a beer or two.” She places her hands and gently straightens his jacket into place. “You look incredibly hot.”
“Yeah?”
She kisses the smirk off his face. “Oh please. Like you don’t know.”
“It’s a good ego boost hearing that from the person’s opinion I care about the most.”
She gently brushes her hand through his hair. “I’m a very lucky woman.”
“I’m the lucky one,” he presses one last kiss on her lips. “I’ll see you after?”
She tilts her head to the side and pouts a bit. “Thought I was going home with you after no matter what, Captain.”
Nico’s eyes darken the slightest bit. Bingo. “Careful, baby.”
Clementine shrugs nonchalantly. “Have fun. Maybe score a goal or two for me?”
“What do I get if I do?”
“Careful, baby,” she echoes with a smirk. “You should head out before Jack and Luke storm back in here. And you know they will.”
He groans. “You ruined the moment.”
She chuckles, gently shoving him back. “Good luck. I’ll see you soon. I love you.”
“I love you too.”
…..
It’s not like anything is wrong, perse.
Clementine doesn’t often get into her overthinking moods. Frankly, she doesn’t have time for it. Since she was 18, it was study hard, let herself be dragged out once in awhile by her friends away from the books, listen to her own gut when it told her she actually needed a break, feel herself falling more in love with medicine and patients and caring for them, rinse and repeat. She’s 27 now, and the contours of that thinking have adjusted to whatever moment she’s in, but her core is still the same.
But when she finds herself in these overthinking moods, it consumes her. Her mom once told her it causes her to think irrationally, and Clementine had snapped back, even though deep down, she knew it was true.
These overthinking moods could be about anything, and have been about anything. From grades, to the overwhelming ache of missing her father, to questioning if the path she’s worked so hard for is worth it, to questioning if going to California for eight years and away from everyone was the best choice or just the convenient excuse she could use when in reality, she was running from her problems. From watching Quinn, Jack and Luke from right next to them but also from so, so far away, to making sure her mother still enjoys and loves life even though it’s been almost ten years since she lost her partner, to her own self worth and if she’s as good of a person that everyone always tells her she is and how that can be true if sometimes she feels like she’s grasping at straws.
The point is, Clementine knows herself well enough to know when one of these moods is coming.
It hits her full force on her commute the way to the hospital, because of course it does. Last night had been really fun with the season home opener. She sat with all the significant others for the first time and the vibe was high. When Nico had scored, the girls had all cheered and pointed to her as she finished off a beer. Some of the fans had given her high fives and maybe had caught on, she thinks, especially because she was wearing a 13 jersey and Nico had pointed in her direction after he scored. But Devils fans are also just really nice, so it also could’ve been nothing.
She already had a lot of the other women’s phone numbers from last year’s Friendsgiving, but she was officially added into the group chat because she’s not just Jack and Luke’s pseudo-sister who lives with them anymore. She’s also the captain’s girlfriend.
Something about that has her mind racing this morning as she watches the streets of New York City at 7:29 a.m. outside the bus window. Now she’s thinking about whether she should be doing more because of that title. In the grand scheme of things, her and Nico haven’t been dating for that long. Realistically, she knows no one is expecting her to do anything more. She venmoed Nicole immediately yesterday when she had casually mentioned the money pool all the significant others have for various things like events, gifts and other things. But should Clementine be the one spearheading that because her boyfriend’s the captain? She just got here. She has no fucking idea.
She always thought being surrounded by hockey her whole life would help her in most of these situations. Not this one.
When the time comes — if the time comes and her and Nico even last as long as she wants to — and off-season comes back around, is he gonna expect her to spend it in Switzerland with him? Obviously, that didn’t happen this summer because they had literally just started dating, but what about the future? She wouldn’t ever ask him to move his training closer to her, but how would off-seasons work in different countries when the regular season is already crazy enough? She knows All-Star breaks and off-season vacations are a thing, but with her inflexible work schedule, how is all that going to work? Will he be upset that she probably won’t be able to join him? What if, somehow, Nico is traded to another team? Clementine’s home for the next four years is going to be New Jersey / New York. And then, vice versa, what happens if her future leads her to yet another part of the country?
Yeah, she’s majorly overthinking now.
Usually, she would talk to someone about it, but in a rare instance, her mind comes up blank. Her mom and Ellen would just tell her to slow down and that she’s being silly. Emilia and her other friends at the hospital would listen, but wouldn't really get it. The other significant others are nice, but she doesn’t feel particularly close enough with any of them yet to voice her intrusive thoughts. No way is she talking to Quinn, Jack or Luke about this.
That would leave Nico. But there’s something about that that feels off too.
She’s also been told multiple times that she can’t keep things to herself. And she really does think she’s gotten better at it throughout the years. But old habits die hard. So she also does something she’s really good at. Putting it all away the second she walks into the hospital
The next time she thinks about it is during a quick break she has inbetween patients, when she checks her phone and sees the notifications from the significant other group chat. Nothing important as she thumbs through quickly, but it still leaves her with a weird feeling in her stomach.
And again, she wills those thoughts to go away as she steps back out into the hallway.
The next few days, Clementine doesn’t see Nico much. She’s at the hospital and he’s busy with the new season starting and getting back into the swing of things, making sure his team is doing well on and off the ice and making sure new guys are acclimating. It’s nothing out of the ordinary — it’s not like she’s seeing Jack and Luke that much either while living with them. But she also knows deep down that it’s more than that.
A week and a half after the season opener, Nico texts her to see if she wants to come over to his after her shift and they can make dinner together. Despite whatever weird things she’s thinking, she says yes. It hits her like a brick that they haven’t seen each other since Nico kissed her goodnight after the season opener.
She can tell something is on his mind immediately, or maybe that he knows something is on her mind, but they both don’t mention it the whole night. Instead, they loosely follow a steak dinner recipe Nico found online and keep the topics light.
But she can’t help but feel like something is off the whole night. Clementine knows she should ask him. Talk to him about it.
She doesn’t.
Her stomach remains in weird knots for the next few days when she lets herself think even for a second about her boyfriend, who’s supposed to be the person she can talk to these things about, right? Clementine’s a bit out of practice — it’s been over three years since she’s had anything sembling a relationship — but goddamn, she doesn’t think this is normal.
But she doesn’t want to burden Nico. He’s already overwhelmed enough with everything on his plate. She can see the wheels constantly turning in his mind. She doesn’t want to add onto that.
So, Clementine avoids.
…..
More patients. More long hours. The Devils first road trip. She should’ve known the people she lives with would pick up on something sooner than later.
“Are you and Schao fighting?”
Clementine has no idea where that nickname came from and has never asked. Hockey players are weird creatures, the nicknames they give their teammates included.
She keeps her head down, putting the chicken pot pies in the oven. “Why do you ask?”
“Because I asked if he wanted to come by for dinner and he made some shitty excuse about calling his family or something.”
“Calling family is not a shitty excuse,” Clementine says automatically. Her back is towards them, but she knows Luke always beelines directly towards the bathroom to rinse off right after practice. So Jack’s the one who’s dropping their bags loudly on the floor. “Bags against the wall, Jacky.”
He grumbles and Clementine smirks to herself in satisfaction as she hears Jack move the bags. “So? Trouble in paradise?”
“None of your business.”
“Dude.”
“I mean it. None of your business.”
She doesn’t exactly snap — somehow, Quinn, Jack and Luke have never annoyed her enough to make her want to — but it’s something close to it. Silence, and then she hears Jack rounding the kitchen island. He tugs at her arm. “Do I need to beat him up? I know he’s my captain or whatever, but I will.”
“Absolutely not.” She finally makes eye contact with him and is taken aback at how serious Jack looks. “I’m not fucking with your team chemistry.”
“Who cares about team chemistry?” Jack asks, watching as she stirs the glazed carrots. “You’re my sister. So I’ll ask again. Do I need to whoop his ass?”
She sighs, leaning her hip against the counter. “No.”
“Are you sure?”
“I’m sure.”
“Do you want to talk about it?”
She shrugs. “There’s nothing much to it. Just a bump in the road, I guess.”
“About?” Jack presses lightly.
Clementine bites her lip. One part of her is telling her that she shouldn’t talk to Jack — or Luke — about her relationship troubles simply due to the fact that Nico’s their captain and friend and teammate and rock and all of that. But the other part of her does want to finally talk to someone. “I think we’re trying to figure out how to be together with both our busy schedules and it’s…tougher than we anticipated.”
Jack hums, “I see.”
Despite herself, Clementine snorts. “I’m not getting relationship advice from my younger brother. I’m not stooping that low.”
“Lame,” Jack shoots back. “Your loss. I think I could give you some decent Nico advice. I’ve known him much longer than you have, you know.”
He does have a point. She watches him blow a piece of hair out of his face in thought. Then, Luke walks in with his damp hair.
“What are you guys talking about?” Luke asks.
“Nothing.”
“Nico.” She glares at Jack, who just shrugs with a smirk.
Luke sits down across from her. “Oh wonderful. We’re talking about how miserable he’s been lately?”
Clementine busies herself by pouring him out a glass of water. “Nico’s been miserable?”
“Uh, yeah.” Luke says in a know-it-all voice that has her wanting to smack him on the head. “Besides, like, maybe a few smiles on the ice after a good play or game or whatever, he’s just had those sad eyes.”
Ah, yes. Those sad eyes. Clementine’s acquainted herself with those, even last season when they weren’t together. They come out after every loss. They’ve never come because of her.
She shrugs, trying to be casual about it. She can feel Jack’s eyes narrowing and knows that his brain is moving. People don’t give Jack enough credit for how perceptive he can be. He tugs at her sleeve again, and Clementine sighs, lowering the flame so she can give him his full attention.
“Do I need to talk to him?” Jack asks softly. “I don’t like seeing either of you sad.”
“Wait, hold on,” Luke interrupts. “You can’t talk to him if you don’t know what’s going on, Jacky.”
“No one is talking to anyone,” she says. “We just haven’t been able to see each other much lately. Or don’t want to. I don’t know.”
“Clee.” Jack says flatly.
She finally cracks, swallowing. “Obviously, I know what a season looks like. I mean, fuck, I lived with you two last year and I literally grew up with hockey all around me. I know it’s busy and I know he’s even busier because he’s captain or whatever. But shit, sometimes it feels like…I don’t know.”
“It feels like what?” Jack presses.
She puts her head in her hands for a few moments before looking back up, squeezing her eyes together to keep the frustrated tears at bay. “Sometimes it feels like he doesn’t even want to be around me. Like we’re strangers or just friends or whatever”
“What?” Luke deadpans. “Clemmy, that’s…what?”
Jack throws his brother a dirty look. “Let her finish.”
“And it’s on me too,” she continues as if they hadn’t interrupted. “Like, yeah, he’s busy, but so am I. And I’ve been taking extra shifts and staying at the hospital to study longer because things are getting harder but, I don’t know. I guess now that we’re actually in the season it’s a whole other thing. I know I’m being unreasonable. Maybe I’m just not cut out for a relationship or whatever.”
She knows the last sentence is an intrusive thought. That doesn’t mean it doesn’t have some semblance of meaning.
“That’s stupid,” Jack says. Clementine looks up from the table to look at him sadly. He has a look of fire in his eyes. “The last part, I mean. Not cut out for a relationship? What does that even mean?”
“If that’s not it, what is?” She huffs out. “I just feel like, I’m losing him? Assuming that I had him in the first place, I guess.”
“Clementine,” Luke starts. He never calls her by her government name. “What are you talking about? That boy is head over heels for you. You’ve had him since the moment you two met, I’m pretty sure.”
“Have you guys talked about this?” Jack asks. “Like, actually sat down and talked about how you’re feeling and why you’re upset.”
“How can we talk when I don’t even know why I’m upset?”
“It doesn't need to be, like, extremely coherent. Even if it doesn’t come out pretty or whatever, at least he’d know and stop making assumptions. And as someone who knows Nico, he’s definitely doing that, but probably not talking to you about it because he thinks he’ll just burden you with it.”
Clementine groans. “That’s the crux of it, I think. We’re not talking about the things that matter. We should be able to do that. Because I also think I’m burdening him with my unnecessary problems.”
“So, let me get this straight,” Luke starts. “Cap’s miserable and you’re miserable because you’re not…talking to each other?”
“Well, when you put it like that, I sound like a dumbass.” She picks at her nails. “It’s also more than that. A lot of factors involved.”
“I’ll talk to him,” Jack promises.
Clementine glares at him. “No. Stay out of it, Jacky. You too, Luke. I’m not putting you guys in the middle of our shit when you have to play with him.”
“I’m not gonna say anything bad,” Jack says. “You said that you feel like he doesn’t wanna talk to you, right? Which I know is a load of bullshit. He, again, probably just thinks he’s bothering you with his shit because that’s how Nico operates. He’s a great captain and will listen to anyone else’s problems, but thinks that no one wants to hear his, which, like you said, is stupid, especially when it comes down to you two. I’ll talk to him, Clee. Give him a little push. And then you two need to talk.”
She turns towards Luke — since when does she trust Luke enough to determine a good idea from a bad one? — who shrugs. “It wouldn’t hurt,” Luke says. “Jack has a way of getting through to Nico like no one else can.”
“Yeah, but that’s on ice stuff. This is off-ice stuff. And something that doesn't involve you guys.”
Jack lets out a little noise at that. “Hate to say it, but the second you guys started dating, we were already involved.”
She sighs. Because he’s right. Again. “I love him,” she says.
“I know. And he loves you too. No one’s doubting that,” Jack says. The oven beeps and before she can move, Luke rushes to gather the pies. “I won’t overstep, I promise.”
They let the topic go for the rest of dinner.
…..
Clementine doesn’t even get the chance to fully swing open the door the next afternoon before Nico’s pulling her into a tight hug. She freezes for a few seconds before melting into his embrace, rubbing her thumbs against the back of his neck as he rests his head on her shoulder. He mumbles something and she asks him to repeat it.
He straightens up, hands still wrapped around her and clears his throat. “I always want to be around you.”
She blinks, before sighing in realization. “Whatever Jack said, it’s-”
“It’s not about what he said,” Nico says, closing the door behind him. “Not entirely. He just…lit a fire up my ass a bit.”
“A bit too bluntly and with so little tact that would seem rude if it wasn’t coming from Jack?”
Nico snickers. “Yeah.” He calms down and looks at her seriously. “I love you.”
“I love you too,” she responds automatically.
“No, I mean,” he pauses and swallows. Clementine knows his wheels are turning. Even after being in North America for almost a decade, sometimes his English fails him and it takes a few moments for him to formulate what he wants to say. “I love you. I always want to be around you. I want to hear about your days at the hospital and I want to kiss you after every win and to hug you after every loss. But most importantly, I want to hear about your thoughts and feelings about everything, and that includes us. I’m sorry that you haven’t felt comfortable to do that lately.”
Her heart lurches and she places her hands on his cheeks. She can’t take the sad, watery eyes. “Hey. Hey. It’s okay. It’s alright. It’s on me too.”
He vehemently shakes his head, his hands reaching to wrap around her wrists. “No, it’s not. I-I’m the one with- you’ve given me so much control, with the season and everything, when you’re just as busy. Probably even busier than me. Shit, you’re literally a doctor. That’s nothing compared to what I do.”
“Nico-“
“I know I need to work on communicating and letting people in. It’s been an issue my whole life. Just ask Nina. I, you know, the team is wonderful and supportive, but I still feel the need to not let them know too much about my struggles, you know? Because I’m supposed to be the leader. But you’re not part of the team. Not in that way. You’re my girlfriend. My best friend. And I need to work on talking things through with you instead of my instinct of shutting down or dealing with it myself.”
Clementine blinks, taking it in. She’s always known Nico to be self aware, but this is a whole new level.
He kisses her gently, before pressing his forehead against hers. “I’m sorry. I’ll be better. That’s a promise. You can come to me with anything, even if you don’t think it’ll be something I want to hear. You can trust me. Rely on me. I’ll prove it to you everyday.”
“You don’t need to prove anything to me,” she says, rubbing his cheekbones with her thumbs. “Just…please talk to me? And I also need to work on doing that with you. I know we’re both busy and have our own separate lives-”
“You are a part of my life,” Nico assures. “A huge part. Like yeah, it’s separate with the fact that you have the hospital and your people there and I have hockey and the people there, but not really. We’re a team, right?”
She smiles at him repeating her words back to her face. She had said that once in their phone calls over the summer where she started rambling about how she’s always seen romantic relationships as more than just sweeping each other off their feet. ‘If the two people aren’t on the same team, then what’s the point? Then it’s just two people with a whole lot of feelings who never truly see each other eye to eye’ she had said.
“Yeah. We’re a team. Since we’re a team, can I propose something?”
“Anything,” Nico rushes out. And it’s so nice to know for sure that he means it.
“Can we try to do one night a week? Just for us? Unless you’re on a road trip or I have a weird shift schedule for some reason. Obviously, more would be great, but one at the bare minimum?”
Nico hums. “One guaranteed date night with you every week? I think I can manage.”
“You think?” she pokes his side.
“It’s perfect,” he says with pure sincerity. “You’re perfect.”
She rolls her eyes. “Far from it.”
“False,” he beams, sneaking another kiss. Clementine’s heart feels the lightest it’s felt in weeks. “I can’t believe Jack was right.”
She snorts. “About? Jack’s never right.”
“I know,” he rolls his eyes, before looking at her in a way that makes butterflies flutter in her stomach. “But he was right this time.”
Oh. They’re not talking about the fight anymore.
…..
(Clementine finally tells Nico everything that day about the overthinking — the tendencies and the topics she was overthinking about this time. He’s rubbing her knee as she talks about how she feels like she has to be setting an example or something because she’s dating him. She knows he wants to interrupt and assure her. She appreciates that he waits until she finishes.
He reassures her, which is nice, but he realizes that that’s not necessarily what she needs. Clementine just needs someone to listen. And Nico thinks everything she says is always worth listening to.
But Clementine also likes to be proactive and have tangible next steps, something she and him have in common. So they both come up with the first step: Clementine sends a text to Kristen Haula, who has a lot of experience of just … being the significant other to a professional athlete. Kristen responds quickly and kindly, asking when Clementine has a day off from work where she can come over and they can chat.
It’s always a breath of relief knowing people want to help with problems that she thinks are stupid. Because they’re usually not stupid. Nico’s there to assure her of that.
She goes to sleep that night with a smile.)
…..
That conversation is just the start. Because you can say all you want in a relationship, say you need to improve things, but until things are actually done, it doesn’t mean squat.
She can tell there’s something on Nico’s mind, even in the short phone call as he’s heading to the rink before a game and she’s heading home from the hospital. Clementine asks multiple times if he’s sure he’s okay and he tells her he’s fine, so she lets it go, wishing him good luck and assuring him she’ll be watching.
The Devils lose 5-1 to Vegas, and it’s so tough to watch that she almost wants to turn it off before it ends, especially after the camera pans to Nico’s face and Jack breaking his stick on the boards in frustration after the final buzzer sounds. A four game losing streak.
After giving Jack and Luke extra long hugs, Luke burying his face into her shoulder and Jack clutching her t-shirt, she calls Nico as she’s climbing into bed.
“Hey baby.”
“Hi.”
“Don’t beat yourself up too much, okay? Are you back at your place?”
“Yeah. What are you doing awake?”
She swallows at his blunt tone. “I wanted to catch you afterwards.”
“I’m fine. Don’t worry about me. Get some sleep.”
“Oh. Okay. Are you sure you don’t wanna talk about it?”
A rustle on his end. “I’m sure.”
“Want me to come by tomorrow morning? I don’t have to head in until the afternoon.”
Silence. “Yeah?” The raspy voice he’s gotten from yelling during the game momentarily makes her smile because she’s always found it so attractive. “Are you sure?”
“Of course.”
“Okay,” she thinks his voice softens. “Yeah. I’d love that.”
“Great. Goodnight, then. I’ll see you in the morning. Sweet dreams. I love you.”
“Goodnight, Schätzli. I love you.”
The next morning, she punches in Nico’s code and walks in to him pouring out a cup of coffee for her. He’s dressed in his typical day off attire: a random t-shirt that she thinks looks unfairly good on him, gray sweatpants and his hair is all messed up. She paddles over to the kitchen.
From behind, she wraps her arms around his waist. “Hi baby.”
“Hey,” he turns in her arms to peck her lips. “You eat yet?” He asks.
“Mmhmm.”
He hums, following her to the couch and sinking down right next to her. He tucks himself into the blanket with an involuntary hum, burying himself into the pillow, dragging her down so that she’s laying on his chest. She breathes in his scent and automatically smiles. She feels him physically relax.
“How’s the hospital been?”
Clementine shrugs. “The usual.”
“Tell me more.”
She blinks. Oh, she realizes. And she then talks about random details of her week that don’t actually matter but she’s figured out that sometimes he just likes to listen to her voice. Whether to ground himself, get himself out of his own head or both. He hums in all the right places to show he’s listening, but she also doesn’t really need him to listen about the workplace drama of people having a theory that two of her coworkers are hooking up.
There’s a lull in the conversation as she listens to his heartbeat. She thinks he might have fallen asleep. She doesn’t dare move to check.
“Eight.”
So he’s not asleep. She taps her fingers on his chest. “Hm?”r
“This is my eighth season in the league. Eighth in Jersey. And I have nothing to show for it.” She swallows. She debates sitting up so she can see him, but she stays still. He sighs. “I feel like we’re just never going to have a good start to the season, and it’s just like this every year and I’m not doing anything right. I can’t shoot. I can’t score. I can’t lead this team.”
“Nico-“
“At this point, if we’re not the team that’s gonna get Jersey to the cup, then who is? It’s always been about potential and things falling into place and sometimes I feel like all of it has and then we end up falling short anyways.” He starts breathing faster and Clementine sits up, holding his hands. She can see the storm in his eyes. “Fuck, I’m the captain. Part of my job is to make sure this doesn’t happen and that when we gain momentum, that we don’t lose it. But it feels like we can’t even gain that momentum so we’re stuck in whatever the hell we’re stuck in. It’s starting to remind me of my first few seasons here, which really fucking sucks and just shouldn’t be where we’re at. Are the pieces ever going to come together like everyone has been saying it will?”
(In the back of her mind, Clementine’s stomach drops because Nico rarely swears, and he just dropped two f bombs in the last 15 seconds)
She squeezes his hands. “Nico. Please listen to me when I say this. It is not all on you. Captain or not, no one is expecting you to carry all of that on your shoulders.” He opens his mouth to counter but she’s quicker. “Nope. I don’t want to hear it. If I’ve learned anything from growing up with three hockey-playing brothers, is that hockey is a team sport. You win together. You lose together. Everything you go through? You go through together.”
“But I feel like I’m not doing anything right.”
“If any single one of your teammates heard you right now, I know they’d smack you in the face.” Clementine says bluntly. “Even before we were dating, from day one of training camp in Jack’s rookie year, when you didn’t even have the C yet, he was already raving to me about how good of a role model you were. You didn’t just get that C just because, Nico. You were and are the best option. I fully believe it. Your teammates respect you so much, baby. I see it with my own eyes every game. And they love and respect you enough to know that this is not all on you. You lead your team so beautifully. It is your team. And fuck the media and what they’re saying. Half of them can’t even hold a stick in their hand or skate. Literally who cares what they think? The outside noise is all bullshit anyways.” She rubs his cheekbones with her thumbs. “I know my words can’t fix the slump you guys are in. But I refuse to let you believe that any of this is entirely your fault. It is anything but. I refuse you to let you believe you’re anything but a good leader. You are the best leader. But you need to put less pressure on yourself over things that are out of your control.”
She lets her words wash over him, as he nods. One of her favorite things about him is that he’s always so expressive, especially in the domestic environment of his apartment under the maroon blanket she knitted him for Christmas. Here he is, not under any arena lights, just in his home away from home, trying to find some grounding. She places a kiss on his forehead and he practically falls into her touch.
“Everything about you always helps,” Nico whispers. “Thank you.”
“No need,” she smiles as his cheek rests on her stomach, arms wrapped around her waist in a tight embrace. “It’s okay to be frustrated and upset, honey. I get it. But you’re gonna drive yourself insane if you keep holding all this weight on your shoulders. Share it with others. Share it with your teammates. Share it with me. It’s what we’re here for.” Nico mutters something in German and she snorts. “English, please.”
“I don’t want to share it with you if it means I’m gonna explode and scare you. That’s the last thing I want to do.”
Clementine blinks, digesting that statement. She picks her words carefully. “It’s more than okay to show emotions. Any psychologist would tell you it’s healthy to do so. The fact that you’re afraid at the idea of scaring me is probably a good indicator that you won’t. And please. Give me some credit. I don’t get scared easily.” She leans down to press a kiss in his hair. “I mean it. Share the burdens, baby. We all want to help.”
He hums and she lets him play with her fingers before she has to go to work.
…..
There were cons to not living near the boys for eight years — missing big moments and not having their presence around all the time being the two biggest ones.
But there were pros too. Such as, not being a part of moments that she would rather be anywhere else for. She doesn’t know who gave the three boys the sex talk (it probably was Quinn, but who gave it to him?) and she knows that if she had been in Toronto or Michigan during that time, she would’ve begrudgingly done it and hated every second.
If she thinks about it too much, it’s kinda incredible how she hasn’t encountered this particular situation yet.
This particular situation being this: Clementine’s just come back from an overnight shift she got let off early from, exhausted to her bones but not exhausted enough to be immobile. On the drive back from the station, she was debating whether to stop by her favorite deli or make her own brunch. She ultimately decided that there are too many things in the fridge to justify her going to the deli. Maybe next week.
So now here she is, preparing her feta egg bake thing that she saw on TikTok, a mix of vegetables drizzled in olive oil and various herbs sitting on the counter on another tray, ready to go into the oven. She hears the front door open and glaces at the clock on the microwave. Morning skate must’ve been earlier than normal today.
“Hello?” Luke’s voice calls out.
“In the kitchen!”
She hears two pairs of footsteps come closer, assuming that Jack is with him. Though if she had stopped to think about it, she would’ve automatically thought it was weird that he didn’t call out a greeting either. She turns around, half smile planted on her face. The half smile doesn’t exactly drop at the sight of the unknown blonde girl next to him. Just turns more confused. Before Clementine can say anything, Luke speaks up.
“Hey. I didn’t think you’d be home until later.”
“They let me out early,” she searches her mind quickly, trying to see how to ask who the fuck is in their kitchen without sounding like a bitch.
Luckily, Luke does it for her. He clears his throat. “Uh, Clemmy, this is Ava. Ava, Clemmy. Or, Clementine, I guess.”
Clementine decides to put him out of his misery a bit. She hopes her smile is friendly enough. “Nice to meet you, Ava.”
“Same here. Are you Jack’s girlfriend?”
Before she can stop herself, she snickers. “He fucking wishes.”
“That’s Amelie,” Luke corrects. “Clemmy’s dating Nico, my captain.”
Ava’s eyes widen. “Oh. I’m so sorry!”
“It’s okay,” Clementine waves away her apology easily. “A lot of names. A lot of characters. Speaking of, where is Jack?”
“Dropped him off at Amelie’s after practice, actually. She’s totally gonna kill me though. I think she has to head to Philly later.”
“She’s definitely gonna kill you. Have you two eaten yet?” She asks politely.
Ava nods. “We did. Thank you so much though.”
“Anytime.” Luke makes a move to lead Ava to his room and Clementine immediately gets the hint. “If you change your mind, our fridge is open to all. I live here, which means there should be something edible.”
“Hey!” Luke protests. The two girls laugh. “Thanks though. Are you heading to Cap’s?”
Clementine shrugs. “I was going to eat, nap and maybe head over later, but I also didn’t know your morning skate was earlier than normal. Maybe I’ll go over to his and use him as my pillow.”
“Don’t drive if you’re too tired,” Luke warns, sounding entirely too much like Jack. “Hisch can wait if needed.”
“Yeah, yeah.” She waves her spatula at them. “Alright. I’m off an overnight shift, so you know what that means.”
Luke rolls his eyes as Ava looks between them curiously. “Your social battery is at its lowest and you’ll start snapping soon.” Ava looks amused and Clementine grins. “C’mon, Ava. Let’s go to my room.”
“It was nice to meet you,” Ava says.
“Likewise,” Clementine responds. The second Luke’s door shuts, she puts the feta egg bake and the vegetables in the oven and immediately grabs her phone, thumbing over to her text chain with Nico.
Clementine Sandoval
lol just had a major big sister moment
She gets a reply in seconds.
Nico Hischier
???
A moment you haven’t already experienced?
Clementine Sandoval
luke just came home with a girl I’ve never met before
Nico Hischier
In the day time? Lol
Does Jack know about this?
Clementine Sandoval
lol i’m assuming not
i def would’ve heard about it by now
luke’s not that stupid if he wanted to keep it quiet (which it seems like he does) jack would be the last person he’d tell
Nico Hischier
You do realize I’m their captain, right?
I could very well be with Jack right now. He could be looking over my shoulder
Clementine Sandoval
please i’m not an amateur
luke already told me he dumped jack at amelie’s
what are you doing the rest of the day?
Nico Hischier
Sitting on my coach and staring at the wall waiting for my beautiful girlfriend to come by after she takes her nap
Clementine Sandoval
whipped
any chance i can come by earlier and nap at yours? didn’t know you guys had an earlier skate
Nico Hischier
Door will be unlocked ❤️
Clementine Sandoval
???? your door has a code
but thanks 🩵🩵 i’ll come by after i eat
After her food is cooked thoroughly, she eats quickly, flicking through emails on her laptop. She can hear a movie playing through Luke’s laptop in his room and murmured voices through the door. As she’s cleaning up and getting ready to head out, she debates on whether she should tell Luke or not. She probably should, because then he’ll start worrying, which is something that she’s noticed all the brothers have done more as they’ve gotten older.
“Luke!” She calls, “I’m heading out.”
“Okay,” she hears his voice through his door. “Are you coming back for dinner?”
“Not sure yet. I’ll text you.”
“Okay!”
Clementine chuckles before grabbing her stuff and closing the front door behind herself.
Nico snorts as she’s retelling what happened, sipping on a cup of coffee. Clementine’s rambling to the max, sitting up on his kitchen counter and swinging her legs, not stopping even as Nico slips himself inbetween them and plants his hands on her thighs.
Suddenly, she trails off with a yawn. He chuckles softly before engulfing her in a hug, kissing her neck softly. “Couch or bed?”
“You don’t like just lounging on your bed.”
“But it’s your nap time and you like my bed.”
She plays with his hair, placing her cup of coffee down carefully. “Couch.”
“Okay,” he hums, helping her off the counter. “Is there anything I need to wake you up for later?”
“I made some sort of promise a few days ago that I’d cook Jack and Luke dinner, and I feel bad that I haven’t done it yet.”
“They can come over here and we can both cook them something.”
“You have groceries in your fridge?”
He gives her a look as she giggles. He tosses a blanket over her. “Sleep before you start getting sassier on me.”
Clementine hums, eyes already drooping. She tugs at his shirt as he’s about to leave. “Stay.”
“Baby-”
“Just until I fall asleep,” she grins as he climbs in, immediately burying her head into his chest as his arm wraps around her. She hums, eyes already shut. “I love you,” she murmurs against the cotton of his shirt.
She feels the gentlest kiss on her forehead before drifting off to sleep.
…..
Clementine loves being able to switch her brain during a live hockey game. Unless she gets a call from anyone at the hospital — which hasn’t happened yet — any good hockey game can turn her often overtired and overstimulated brain off.
So when Sarah, one of the staffers she frequently runs into at Devils games, comes up to her row, Clementine’s immediately standing up. “Sarah? What are you doing up here?”
“Can you come with me for a second?” At Clementine’s concerned stare, Sarah continues quickly. “Nothing bad! Just want your help on something medical related.”
“Medical related?” Clementine stands up and starts following Sarah.
“One of the kids in the Islanders box hurt herself and I’m pretty sure it’s just a sprained ankle, but you work with kids so I figured you could give another opinion and calm her down, maybe? If you don’t mind, of course.”
Clementine breathes out a sigh of relief. This she can handle. “I don’t mind at all. Jesus, Sarah. I thought it was something more serious.”
Sarah grimaces. “Sorry. Again, I just want a second opinion. I’m sorry to interrupt you watching the-”
“I get it. And hey, I’ve watched dozens of games by now.” They arrive at the visitor’s suite and somehow, Clementine feels immediately at home even though there’s an adorable blonde girl crying on the floor with her mother kneeling down next to her.
Clementine bends down and sits on the back of her heels. “Hi cutie. My name is Clementine. I’m here to help you, okay?” The mom, who is drop dead gorgeous, mutters some encouraging words to her daughter. “Can you tell me what happened, sweetie?”
Inbetween hiccups, the young girl explains that she was running around because her dad had just scored a goal but had run into a chair and had fallen backwards and now her ankle really hurts and if it’s broken she won’t get to play with her friends at recess. Clementine softly shushes her and calms her down before asking if she can take a look. The young girl nods and Clementine gingerly takes her ankle, rolling up her jeans. She speaks to the girl softly (who Clementine learns is named Winnie), asking about who she’s here to see and the game and anything else to keep her distracted while she does her routine checks.
Clementine taps her ankle. “Well, good news, Winnie. It’s only swollen, which won’t require going to the hospital. I’m just gonna wrap it up for you and get you some ice to keep on it, okay? And lots of rest, which means no running around for a bit.” She nods thankfully at Sarah, who runs to grab some bandages and an ice pack.
“Does that mean I get to watch Disney all day tomorrow?” Winnie asks.
Clementine laughs. “That’s gonna be a decision your mama has to make.” She turns to the gorgeous blonde again with a smile. “Everything’s all fine. Just lots of rest and ice and she’ll be good in no time. You can give her children’s motrin if she complains that it hurts too much, but it shouldn’t if she isn’t moving it around.”
“Thank you so much,” she says gratefully, putting her hand out. “I’m Sydney. It’s nice to meet you. I’m really sorry for interrupting your game.”
Clementine waves her away. “It’s no problem at all. I’ve seen a bunch of these, so I’m not too pressed.”
“Are you a doctor?”
“Not yet technically. I’m in my second year of residency with pediatrics and ER. But I promise I know what I’m doing.”
“Oh, no! I trust you, don’t worry. You have a very calming presence.”
“Well, your daughter is super sweet. So I’m sure you have a lot to do with that.”
Sydney beams. “You’re so sweet! Thank you.”
“Who are you here for?”
“Number 17. Matt Martin. He’s my husband. How about you?”
Clementine chuckles, as Sarah comes back with the supplies and Clementine wraps the bandage around Winnie’s ankle. “Depends who you ask.”
“Oh?”
“Well, I grew up with Luke and Jack. 43 and 86. But I’m dating Nico. Number 13.”
“That’s the captain, right?”
“It is.”
Clementine’s surprise must show through her voice because Sydney laughs. “Honestly, I don’t know why I know that. I blame my past journalist self who picks up on details quickly. Or the Devils and Islanders being in the same division.”
“That’s completely fair. I feel like I know too much about hockey for someone who never played.”
“It’s an added layer when we choose who we surround ourselves with, right?” Sydney says and Clementine nods with a smile. “Where are you doing your residency?”
“I’m mainly at NYC Health and Hospitals / Bellevue. First and 28th.”
“Do you live in the city?”
“Oh, no. Though that’s probably smarter, right?” They both laugh. “No, I live with Jack and Luke in Hoboken. They kinda begged, and it saves me money, and I don’t mind the commute.”
Sydney looks around for Winnie, who’s hanging out with one of the other Isles wives and is occupied. “Am I keeping you from someone? Thank you again for all your help.”
“No, not at all! Decided to come out solo tonight.”
Sydney then nods to two empty seats against the glass. “Come sit with me?”
Clementine just smiles and follows her to the seat as Winnie runs at her legs. The two women laugh as Clementine picks her up and sits her on her hip.
She leaves that night with a new number in her phone. Jack whines about her “befriending the enemy” as Luke cackles. Nico just grins, because he knows what it’s like to be captivated by her energy instantly.
*****
Clementine’s reading on Nico’s couch when she hears him groan loudly from the kitchen. When she doesn’t hear an explanation, she finishes the sentence and looks up.
“Everything okay?”
“No,” he grumbles, walking back in and typing something rapidly on his phone. “The rookies and the young guys went out and got way too drunk and called me by accident. I literally couldn’t understand more than two words of what Shea was saying.”
“How are they getting home?”
Nico sighs and picks up his keys. “I’m getting them. I don’t trust them to not puke all over an Uber right now.”
“But you trust them to not puke in your car?”
“I’ll tell them to aim out the window.”
Clementine snorts, standing up. “You drank earlier. I’ll drive.”
Nico blinks. “I didn’t drink that much.”
“Don’t care. I’m driving. How many of them are there?”
Nico looks at his phone, presumably his texts, to confirm. “Five. But apparently Luke called Jack so he’s coming too.” Nico laughs, reading another text. “And Amelie. Must be a similar vibe at the Hughes apartment tonight.”
“It was. Amelie told me they were having a chill date night too.” She quickly goes to Nico’s room to toss on one of his Devils sweatshirts. She comes back out and sticks her hand out as Nico slips on his shoes. “Keys. And grab a few trash bags, please.”
Nico obeys before they’re both out the door, his hand naturally brushing against her back as they wait for the elevator. “I’m sorry.”
“For?”
“All of this.”
She snorts as the elevators doors shut. “Don’t need to apologize for your teammates acting their age.”
“Yeah, but it’s not your responsibility to deal with that.”
“It’s yours though.”
He furrows his eyebrows. “I’m not following.”
She rises on her tiptoes to kiss him, to which he responds with enthusiasm despite his confusion. “Your boys, my boys, no?” She murmurs against his lips, letting him steal two more kisses. “I’m dating you. You’re the captain of an NHL team. You look out for the guys. Therefore, so do I.”
Nico shakes his head with a fond smile as the elevator doors open and he shuffles them both to the garage, his hands steadily on her hips. “You’re the best, you know that?”
“Been told that once or twice in my life,” she dodges his pokes as they walk to the car.
It only takes them 15 minutes before they’re in front of a bar. Nico pulls in right next to Jack’s car and Clementine laughs as all four of them get out of their cars at the same time. One look at Amelie tells her that she probably was dragged out of bed to come here.
She nods at the younger girl as they trail behind their boyfriends walking into the bar. “Chauffeur?”
Amelie smiles wryly, handing her a few bottles of water for whoever is coming in Nico’s car. “No. I’m the one who actually opened the wine tonight. But I don’t trust Jack to wrangle these guys by himself. Also, he promised he’d get me lunch from my favorite place tomorrow before I have to drive to Long Island.”
Clementine whistles. “Good girlfriend you are.”
Amelie tosses an arm around Clementine’s shoulders, which makes the latter grin. Amelie had been a bit shyer when they met at the start of the season, but she likes to think she’s cracked the photographer’s exterior a bit. They walk into the bar and just follow the guys, who quickly find their teammates. Clementine only raises an eyebrow as Seamus stumbles to give Nico a hug, almost taking out Simon in the process, who looks like he’s about to either fall asleep or throw up any minute. Jack is subtly steering glasses of alcohol away from Alex as he’s chatting away to Luke. Clementine’s half convinced he’s speaking Swedish and Luke’s too drunk to realize. She scans the bar to find the last straggler and chuckles when she sees Nico (little Nico, she affectionately calls him) come out of the bathroom. He brightens up when he sees the older girl and Clementine laughs loudly as he almost falls into her arms.
She, Nico, Jack and Amelie corral everyone into the two cars — Luke, Alex and Nico riding with Jack and Amelie and Seamus and Simon with Clementine and Nico, all purely based on proximity. Clementine gives both Amelie and Jack hugs before climbing into the drivers seat. She gives Seamus and Simon each bottles of water as she starts the engine.
“Drink. The whole thing. Both of you.” She commands. She peeks through the rearview mirror to make sure they do.
“I’m waiting for the lecture, Mrs. Cap.” Seamus groans out.
Clementine snorts. “No lecture from me. But you guys do remember that you have a team meeting tomorrow, do you?”
“How do you know that?”
Nico snorts as an answer as Clementine rolls her eyes. “How much did you guys have?”
“I stopped counting after the third round of shots,” Seamus says. Simon might have fallen asleep for all she knows.
“And who bought that round?” Nico asks.
“Luke,” Seamus and Clementine say simultaneously. She hears Simon groan, so he’s not asleep. Nico just chuckles.
It only takes 30 minutes to get them both safely home and to get back to Nico’s apartment. It’s almost 2 a.m. by the time they get back. Clementine gets comfortable fast, with Nico’s body pressed up against hers. The last conscious thought she has before drifting off to sleep is that she wants to do this with him for the rest of her life.
The first thing she hears when she wakes up is a bunch of male voices. She squints at her phone. 10:27 a.m. Team meeting started at 10. She yawns and rolls out of bed, washing her face and brushing her teeth before deciding to go fix up a quick breakfast for herself before locking herself in Nico’s room so the team can do whatever they do during team meetings.
The voices all halt as she nears the living room. Any other situation she would be a bit embarrassed perhaps, but frankly, they all know and should’ve expected this. And they’re in her apartment. Or Nico’s. But it also might as well be ours.
She offers a lazy salute. “Morning boys.” A chorus of greetings echoes and Clementine chuckles. “Don’t mind me. I’ll be out of your hair in a second.”
“You can stay,” Nico says softly with a smile from where he’s standing behind the couch. She just waves him off, pours out a cup of coffee, quickly fixes herself some hummus toast with feta on top and slips back into his room.
She sets her food down carefully on the bedside table and eats while scrolling through her email and social media. She even puts her headphones in so she’s not tempted to listen to the guys through the wall.
It’s about a half an hour later when she hears a faint knock on the door. She calls out a “come in” and takes out her Airpods with a smile when Nico peeks his head in.
“Hi Schatz.”
“Hey. What’s up?”
“The boys wanna say hi,” she opens her mouth to protest but he beats to her to it. “We’re pretty much done. Pizza’s coming any minute so we’re just chilling out now.”
Clementine grabs her empty plate and mug, rising up to her toes to press a kiss on his cheek. “Breaking the diet?”
“We just won a tough back to back. We deserve it.”
“Sure you do,” she chuckles as he playfully swats her butt. They walk back out into the living room together and she rolls her eyes as everyone cheers. Nico heads back to the living room as she heads into the kitchen to start another pot of coffee, politely nudging Dawson and Dougie out of her way.
Nico’s apartment is spacious, but twenty plus hockey players all crowding around make it feel much smaller than normal. Clementine decides to swing herself on top of the counter to chat with Luke and John, mostly content with listening to them talk.
When she hears a chorus of laughter, she turns to the living room to see what’s going on to already see quite a few of the guys looking at her. She raises an eyebrow at Nico, who she swears has a slight blush painting his cheeks. But he doesn’t shy away and beams at her instead. With some boldness, she bounces over to him, squeezing in beside him on the couch. He leans into her touch automatically. She wonders if this is a side of their captain his team hasn’t seen much before.
That last thought has her hesitant for a second, but as if Nico can sense it, he takes her hand off his shoulder and kisses the back of it before going back to a previous conversation with Jesper. Her hand remains in his. She catches Timo’s close-lipped smile and Nate’s visible delight. Clementine just sends them a wink before leaning into Nico’s side.
Without missing a beat in laughing at something Jesper says, Nico places a kiss in her hair.
(Later, as the team is starting to filter out of Nico’s apartment, Jonas pulls him aside. Nico is immediately on high alert when Jonas decidedly switches to their native language. They don’t do that often during the season.
“She’s great. Clementine,” Jonas starts.
Nico’s eyebrows shoot up his forehead. “Yeah? You think so?”
“Yeah,” they both look over to the other side of the living room, where she’s in the midst of a playful debate about something with Jack and Jesper. Though from the way she punches Jack in the arm, maybe it’s not so playful. “I know we met at the end of last season, but I wanted to give it some time. She’s weirdly perfect for you.”
“Spit it out, Jonas,” Nico stares at him.
Jonas just stares back for a bit before letting out a small chuckle. “I’m really happy for you, truly. You deserve someone like her.”
“Like her?”
“Yeah. Someone smart, beautiful and who will be just as all in as you are.”
Nico looks down at his feet, heat rising up his neck all of a sudden. “She’s the best, really. Kinda keeps me sane without even trying.”
“That’s all you can ask for from a partner,” Jonas pats his shoulder once before calling out a goodbye to everyone.
Clementine rushes over to give Jonas a quick goodbye hug. Nico feels himself falling and not wanting anyone to catch him.)
…..
The universe is on their side for the 10 year anniversary of Miguel’s death, with the Canucks scheduled to play in town the day after. Ellen, Jim, Quinn, Jack, Amelie, Luke, Maeve, Clementine and Nico all go out to brunch on New Year’s Day, before heading to the cemetery.
They’re all bundled up as they lay out a few blankets, lay down their flowers and some of Miguel’s favorite food and snacks. The cemetery is quiet, but it’s quickly filled with everyone’s laughter as they share their favorite memories and reminisce. Quite a few tears are shed and the tissue box is passed around often.
When they’re about to leave, everyone gets their individual moments by his tombstone to pay their last respects. Clementine and Maeve let the Hughes’s go first, hands intertwined with each other. Then, Clementine and Maeve step up and the young woman swallows, her mom’s head falling on her shoulder. With one last squeeze, Maeve steps back and gently ushers Nico to stand next to his girlfriend despite his gentle protests.
The second she feels Nico’s arm draping across her back, Clementine lets out a sob as she buries part of her face into his jacket. It’s not a sad sob, but it’s not a happy one. She’s happy he’s here with her. She wishes her dad could meet him and love him as much as she knows he would.
Once they reach the bottom of the hill, Quinn reaches out to squeeze her hand. She keeps her right hand in his as Nico’s pressed against her left side. She stares ahead at her mother pressed between Ellen and Jim with Jack, Amelie and Luke right behind them in a similar embrace.
The birds are chirping. The sound of the wind is made even more noticeable as it whistles through the leaves. The sun is shining, not a single cloud in the sky.
Clementine feels peace settle into her heart.
#fucking finally lol everyone cheered#k writes#hockey fanfiction#nhl#nhl fic#hockey fic#new jersey devils#devils#nico hischier#nico hischier fic#nico hischier x oc#quinn hughes#jack hughes#luke hughes#nico hischier blurb#nico hischier writing#hockey writing#nhl writing#nhl blurb#hockey blurb#the blue au
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Hi! I understand if this isn’t something you’re interested in but I was wondering if you could write the boys being possessive/protective over the reader. I was just rereading final girl chapter 5 and I’d just love to see her rip them a new one in her own way about boundaries and stuff and seeing them manipulate/grovel there way in to her good graces again or like how she would’ve reacted to the boys scaring away the boy who took her to the party if Billy wasn’t in one of his moods I don’t know if I asked this right I’ve sent asks so many time to you now and I’m all ways worried I don’t convey/explain what I mean properly and it’s just confusing for you but anyway have a good day/night and whether you can or can’t,thank you anyway :)
*set in the same world as the final girl fic series but can be read as a stand alone with little to no context lol
A/n hi!! there's still some manipulative vibes in this bc i just feel like one of them is bound to trauma dump as a way 'in' when y/n's mad at them but i still feel like it's mainly nice! especially bc there's some emotional growth
----
You're still on the phone, moving in and out of their line of sight. The intention was never to watch you from the sprawling tree they use to get to your window, but there was something about your focus on the whatever conversation you're still having that left Billy telling Stu to wait.
Billy's not sure what he's waiting for. Maybe it's a form of masochism, to see how long you'll talk to whoever's on the other end.
"She's still on the phone." Stu's voice has taken on that hollow, detached quality that's never an indicator of self control. Billy says nothing, not in the mood to defend you or deflect the stinging. "He wouldn't call her..."
There's a second part of Stu's sentence that's just implied. He wouldn't call her after what happened in the locker room. "She found out. She might have called him."
The words leave a bitter taste in his mouth. The fact that Jack McCarthy didn't permanently fade back into obscurity after he and Stu made it clear that while you might buy the whole study-buddy act, they can see straight through him is pounding inside his head. Again and again, the start of a headache.
"If you don't want to..." Stu presses his palm into bark, so hard he wouldn't be surprised if he pulled his hand away bloody. "If you're not in the mood to talk to cutie in there, there's always another way to see if she's talking to him."
Even though it's a barely an idea, a soft suggestion, the knot in Stu's chest loosens with the words. Just checking in on Jack could easily turn into calling Jack...which would lead to the most mind clearing thing Stu can imagine. Thoughts of tearing him apart, piece by piece until it's impossible to tell that the mess of red and guts was ever the teenager with the letterman jacket that threw his arm around you during your study period rush to the front of Stu's mind. It's so soothing that he almost moves to the lower branch that lets him reach the ground.
Stu thinks about bringing it up again, a little less subtle and more desperate but he wants it too bad to care. Needs it. You pace back into view as his lips part. You're now holding the phone against your other ear, meaning that the receiver is no longer blocking your face. He pauses, taking the opportunity to watch you more openly than he normally lets himself.
Your lips are slightly parted in a just barely-there pout and your eyes are locked on something in front of you. There's something about the slight, halfhearted irritation in your expression. It takes Stu a second to place why he can't stop staring and then it clicks--it's twistingly cute...and you're...pretty.
Not that Stu doesn't regularly see you as attractive or hot, but pretty's different. At least, different in the way it's sticking out to him now, like a splinter that breaks off beneath the skin before you can pull it out. You're pretty in a way that Stu never thinks about. Pretty in a soft way that reminds him of domestic shit and makes his chest feel tight.
"We uh--" It's not the first time they've popped by with a backpack with a few things to do, but this time it's different. They took their time thinking about what you'd like, what'd work as a sort of peace offering. Now, watching you chat away without a care in the world over your fight, it all feels pathetic.
Everything becomes a soft buzz of background noise as you press you sigh. Billy wishes he knew how to better read lips because you sigh, say something, and then dramatically fall back on your bed.
You shift onto your stomach, propping your head up with an elbow. The oversized T-shirt that you're in slides down your shoulder and your hair's a little fluffier than before due to your movements. There's a softness to your appearance that leaves an odd feeling flaring in Billy's stomach, a sensation that could be considered butterflies if it felt less like being stabbed.
The in-between of too close while still being so far is oddly overwhelming drawn out like this. Billy swallows as you laugh at something from the other line. "We're already here."
It's a different level of sad to get here and then turn around, so Billy shift forward and finally reaches for the window. The move has grown so familiar Billy even knows at what point he needs to push a little harder because of the way the sides stick to the frame. He moves his hand an it doesn't budge. To add salt to the wound, you've locked the window. You never lock the fucking window.
A dangerous wave of flighty rejection coils in his stomach. The part of him that knows how to think in the long term knows that he should leave while he still can. The last thing anyone needs is for Billy to start associating this with you.
The window creeks and your head snaps towards them. Your eyebrows draw together and you sit up fully, even more of your shoulder and collarbone exposing themselves with the motion. You mumble something into the phone, a beat passes, and then you stand. you approach the window begrudgingly, placing a hand on your hip before cradling the phone between your neck and cheek.
Your lips are pressed together in a way that seems to lull the violent mindset of them both. It's the kind of look you get when you're trying not to smile. After a second, you lean down, undo the lock, and open the window.
"You won't belie--" You sigh, moving to hold the phone again, "Stop enjoying this." Whoever's on the other line must really be annoying you, because you shift back enough to let Billy and Stu in through the window. "Seriously, I'll hang up."
Billy and Stu exchange a look. They're here, trying to get you past something only you think is an issue, and you're still on the fucking phone. Who could be that important?
"No! You are so not talking to them."
There's a brief silence as you wander back towards your bed. The growing discomfort in Billy's chest wins his silent, internal argument. "Who wants to talk to us?"
At that, you finally pause, breeziness briefly leaving your eyes as you look at him. That look pinches at Billy's flightiness and soothes a part of him that he doesn't quite get. You're so good at that, at detecting whatever you want in him. The inability to twist and fully control your perception of him is overwhelming sometimes. Too similar to the way that his mom could--
"Hallie." Your normal expression has come back, like it always does. The awareness that Billy doubts you understand outside of a subconscious level never lingers on your face. But your voice delivers the answer so gently it feels like an olive branch. "You've subjected her to a super long rant about your betrayal."
Despite all the aggression you forced into your words, that relaxes something in them both. Hallie--the completely harmless childhood best friend that's still in Texas. States away, way too far to come between the three of you, even if she wanted to.
"Hallie," Stu repeats, and Billy can feel Stu's shift to something much more genuine. "The super hot girl from your vacation pho--"
"Do not start." You hold up a finger in warning and there's something in the reaction. You'd deny it if anyone ever brought it up, but Stu's noticed the way you get when he goes out of the way to hit on anyone. Even Tatum. You're subtle about, but you get a little quieter as you pick at your nails or try to focus on something else. This time, though, there's none of that, just a bit of urging annoyance. "She has a big enough head as is."
There's a sound from the other line and you roll your eyes. "What? It's true." You're listening to whatever's on the other end intently. "Okay--fine--bye, loser." Another wave of chatter from the other line. "Uh--it's--" You glance over at the two boys still lingering in the corner. "Love you, too. Bye."
You hang up, making a point of keeping your back to them as you set the receiver back onto the machine on your nightstand.
Stu breaks, laughing once. You snap your head in his direction. "Shut up."
Stu takes a tentative step towards you, already liking how quickly you're easing. Maybe all you needed was to feel a little more in control by ranting to someone that isn't here. "Why don't you ever tell me you love me?"
You glare at Stu's exaggerated pout. "You do not get to make fun of me while I'm mad at you." You stand a little straighter. "Why are you guys even here?"
"Not making fun of you." Stu reaches your bed, flopping onto your mattress like he lives with you. He casually picks up a fluffy pillow and squeezes it to his chest. "Genuinely hurt that you don't love us."
Confusion cracks at your annoyance, "Us?"
"If you said 'I love you' to grumpy before me, I don't wanna know." He squeezes the pillow a little tighter, turning his head and squeezing his eyes shut like he can't take the agony. "Too painful, bug."
You cross your arms again, eyes awkwardly falling to the ground. It's not Stu's dramatics that get to you, but you never like it when anyone reduces Billy into something negative and angsty. "He's not grumpy."
"Oh, defensive." Stu absentmindedly weaves his fingers through the pillow's layer of fluff. "Didn't think you'd still care."
You sigh, annoyed at his passive aggressiveness as if they didn't come to your room while fully aware of how mad you are. "That's dramatic, even for you."
"Is it?" Billy mumbles the question, low and almost unsure. "We--we weren't sure if you'd talk to us again."
The comment leaves you feeling like the intruding force. Something about their somber mood makes it seem like you're what's unfitting even though they came to your room. "Just because I'm mad right now doesn't mean I'll be mad forever."
You're not sure you could be. Sure, you have other friends you really care about, but they're all linked to Billy and Stu. They're dating Sid and Tatum and Randy's usually with the group. It's not that you think the three of them would cut you off, but it wouldn't be the same. And even if everything without Billy and Stu could be perfect, you still wouldn't be happy. Not fully.
You'd miss them, miss the way that Stu can always make you laugh no matter how you're feeling and how comforting Billy's presence can be. They might really push boundaries sometimes, but they're still your best friends.
"I get that you--" Sighing, you scratch the back of your wrist. "Hallie and I were talking about it and she reminded me that you guys have good intentions, and I get that, but this is the second time I have to find out that you threatened someone behind my back."
Stu's moved onto his side, head propped up on an elbow as he watches you. Billy's still lingering near the window. Both of them are quiet and that's getting to you. "I'm not a little kid and I don't need you guys to approve of everyone I'm friends with."
"They didn't want to be friends with you." There's no argument in Stu's voice or aggression, just a factual flatness that leaves your face hot.
You shift your weight from one foot to the other. Noel wanting more than friendship's something that makes sense. He was flirty, you went out on a date, and he's known for being an insensitive player. But Jack didn't seem like that at all. Sure, he's a quarterback and hangs out with the guys that never shut up during class, but he had a reason to study with you. Your english teacher assigned him to be tutored by you because his grades were dropping to the point where his coach was threatening to bench him. Sure, he was nice to you, but that's probably because he was worried about his grade. No star player wants to be benched during recruiting season.
The implication also leaves a hard feeling in your stomach. It picks at an insecurity that rooted itself into you around that time in middle school where kids pair up and start dating. Naivety is a weak spot when it comes to teenagers and your inexperience translates into that. Part of it is your mom, the way she's been open about what it meant to become a mom at 17. The rest of it is genuine interest and practicality. You want to go to Princeton, dating is distracting and you haven't really met anyone you like enough to sacrifice studying or time with your friends.
And it doesn't bother you. Not usually. You know life is long and eventually the whole relationship thing will click and work its way to you, probably with some college guy that's majoring in something artsy, but then things like this come up and it makes you feel so stupid.
"Doesn't matter what they want." That feels like a mature enough answer, and it's not a lie. Teenage boys want sex. You're not so out of the loop that that's some kind of revelation. But what they want or think they're getting doesn't change you. "I'm not an idiot and I'm not that naive."
Even if you were, it's not their business to get involved without you asking. For all they know, maybe you want to hook up with someone. That's your choice, not theirs. "And even if I was, it's still my choice."
Billy angles his head downwards, eyes a little darker than you remember them being. "So our big crime is not wanting you to get hurt?"
Ugh. That's more or less the argument Hallie made while playing the devil's advocate. It must have taken a lot for Hallie to defend anyone that isn't you, but she knew that blowing up your friendship with Billy and Stu over a guy you barely knew would only hurt you more in the long run.
"It's--" Trying to explain your issue with the situation is getting exhausting. They're not capable of focusing on anything besides their intentions. "It's a boundaries thing. You can't threaten anyone you don't like into not talking to me behind my back."
Stu's sitting up now, the plush pillow on his lap. "We didn't think of it that way, angel. We just--we know those guys and know what they're like and what you're like, and--" He's fidgeting, fingers tangling into the synthetic hairs of the pillow. "We don't want anything happening to you."
The sentiment's there, forced out almost shyly. It's almost enough to distract you from the weird intensity there. Something happening to you. Over some guy. You get that heartbreak can be a pretty intense thing, but it can't be that bad.
"Nothing's--" You cut yourself off with a sigh. At this rate, they'll eventually be more protective than your mom. They're both weirdly quiet. "What's the big deal if I'm 'hurt' by some stupid guy? It's not like I'd lose it and stop talking to my friends or like it'd effect us or...anything."
Billy lets out a low scoff. The sound is so cold and unlike him you don't know how to react. "Really?"
You hesitate before reminding yourself that it's still just Billy. "...Yeah?" The single syllable falls flat. "I mean...why would it?"
Billy steps forward. "All it took for me to lose--" The sudden movement makes you stiffen until he sits at the foot of your bed, next to Stu. "My mom was her being hurt by some 'stupid guy'.'
Stu freezes. There are a lot of ways this could have gone, but he didn't think that Billy would drop that. Not tonight, with the way Billy tiptoes around his mom's absence and the reason behind it. It's not the kind of thing he'd throw away just to get you to make up with them a little faster...and the rawness in Billy's voice...
Jack might have to end up on their call list anyway.
You're silent as you study them with an expression that would be completely unreadable if it wasn't for the tiny crease between your eyebrows. Billy's hinted at stuff with his mom before, but the way he talked about her always framed her in a way that made it seem like she had passed. You also didn't think he'd ever say anything about what happened so bluntly...or that something that seemed so small to you could have been forcing him to think about those things.
Billy's eyes are focused on nothing in particular, one of his knees pressed against Stu's. His insides feel like they're at war with each other. That bleeding honesty took over with no warning and it's blinding him to everything else. The reminder of the abandonment gnaws at him.
The mattress dips. You don't know what the right way to react is. While this makes their behavior make a little more sense, that doesn't make your point wrong. They did overstep. But that's nowhere near as heavy as Billy's thing. And it couldn't have been easy for Stu to watch his best friend's life fall apart over something like that.
There's something you should say, you're almost sure of it, but nothing feels good enough. Pointing out the differences in the situation feels callous and any promises you could make would likely make it seem like you blame his mom. You might not know much about their relationship, but the way Billy talks about her, like her memory's this fragile thing, you know better than to risk it. An apology also doesn't feel like the right answer, you haven't done anything wrong and you don't want to risk bringing up the fight.
You stretch out a hand silently, letting your fingertips brush against the back of his palm. He briefly tenses, but doesn't move away, so you take it as an okay to rest your hand over his.
Your touch is warm and unexpected, an anchor Billy's torn between latching onto and running away from. It's overwhelming, the amount of influence you have over him. Sometimes if he thinks too much about how that uncertainty feels he has to fight to not hold it against you.
"I know it's..." Billy speaks slowly, trying to force himself to believe what he's saying, or at least, focus on it enough to act like he does. "Different, it just..."
You brush your pointer finger across his knuckles. "I know." A warmth that's hard to accept burns through his chest. Billy turns his hand over before loosely linking your fingers together. "Just boundaries, okay?"
Billy nods, a bit more color returning to his face. You straighten your spine to look past Billy's shoulder and at Stu. "That goes for you, too."
"You've got it, babe."
"That means no more threatening guys just because they talked to me." You keep your expression serious in an attempt to stare down Stu. It's probably no where near as menacing as you want it to be. "I'm serious."
He lifts an arm to his chest, drawing an uneven cross over his heart. "Scout's Honor."
You roll your eyes. "You were never a boy scout."
Stu frowns, "How would you know?"
It's not so much information as it is his vibe. Stu seems way too active and focused on what he'd find fun to have wanted to stick to boy scouting and you doubt his parents have ever been around enough to make him. But that's way too much to answer his question with. "Were you?"
"Ye--"
"He got kicked out," Billy interjects, "After terrorizing a camping trip."
You laugh before you can stop yourself. It's easy to picture Stu a little younger and a lot more impulsive. "That tracks."
"Fuck off," he mumbles before slumping down until he's flat on his back.
Billy turns his head, giving you a look that seems to ask why you two put up with him. The expression is so familiar you can't help your relief. You're still a little rightfully annoyed at them, but the desire to keep them lighter beats that irritation out by an inch. "What'd he do?"
The real answer isn't anything too traumatic, but it involved newly learned pocket knife skills, a frog, and a pathetically squirmish tent mate. But that's not the kind story of you'd be particularly into. It might even make you a little more closed off. They learned early on that while you might be able to handle most scary movies and gore like a champ, you draw a line at anything happening to an animal.
"Imagine that at age 10." Billy vaguely gestures in Stu's direction, Stu lifts an arm to shove Billy. "What didn't he do?" You smile, a little more amused than you want to be. "And you've seen his house...the way he lives..."
Another wave of laughter rises up your throat before you can help it. The implication that Stu was too spoiled to get through a camping trip is a little too fitting.
Stu groans, reaching back for the fluffy pillow. He smacks Billy's arm with it, a passive display of aggression. "It was not like that." Stu turns his neck, "Don't listen to him."
You laugh again, briefly forgetting that you're still supposed to be annoyed with them as you lay down. "I've been to your house, your bathroom has more amenities than a hotel, so I believe him."
He twists his neck to glare at you. It's more of a pout than anything else. "You have a hundred things in your bathroom."
Stu's technically right, but it's different. He's counting in your perfectly reasonable--and reasonably(ish)--priced makeup, skin care, and hair stuff. Not all things you use everyday or necessarily need, but it's different. He has fancy hand soap that leaves skin extra soft and lotion for guests that's nicer than anything you own for yourself. "You're deflecting."
He scoffs, "Can't hear you over the beauty store in your bathroom."
It's said so seriously it circles back to kind of ridiculous. Especially because of how pointless it is. You wrinkle your nose, fighting down a grin. "That doesn't make sense."
Stu's lips part like he's going to instinctually jump to defend himself. Your smile stops him. "It doesn't."
After a beat, the two of you exchange a look and laugh. Billy sighs, shoving Stu's leg and your arm. "You two aren't funny."
"Maybe you're just boring."
Billy looks over at you, glaring. "Really?"
You nod, a little too smug. "Really."
"Don't listen to him." Stu halfheartedly pushes Billy. In retaliation, Billy extends an arm without looking, grabbing Stu's forearm in a way that, to you, looks surprisingly gentle. "He's jealous."
You smile as Stu sits up. "I can so see that."
Billy's eyebrows draw together. "Jealous of what?"
"Our not-boringness." You push yourself so that you're sitting again.
"Yeah, you two are super cool and not weird."
Scoffing, you pull your legs onto the bed and cross them beneath you. "I'm not weird."
Billy tilts his head in the direction of your desk. "How many sticky notes are in--"
"You promised not to use that against me." You cut him off, not overly thrilled at the mention of sticky notes. Early on in your friendship, he found you going through your locker while you were sorting through sticky note and highlighter combos for homework.
His eyebrows pull together, his nose wrinkling a little in a way that's painfully endearing and surprisingly casual. "I promised not to tell anyone." He angles himself towards you, tilting his head downwards. The movements were subtle, but something about the shift makes him feel a lot closer than before. "That's different."
Your breath tangles itself in your throat at his lower tone. You need to say something, because if you don't you'd just be staring and that's--You force out the first thing you can think of, "Technicality."
"Still counts." There's nothing else you can think of and he still feels closer than normal. Before your thoughts can turn into total panic, Billy turns towards Stu, who's digging through his backpack. "What are you doing?"
"Almost forgot." Stu finds what he's looking for. It's small from where you're sitting. He reaches behind Billy's bag to extend whatever he's holding towards you. "Here."
A bag of gummy candies. You take it skeptically, because it's been twisted shut oddly. Smoothing out the wrinkled plastic, you open the bag and look at the contents. A part of you is surprised that it actually does have gummies...only they all look the same. Confused, you shake the bag once and the candies move, confirming it is what it looks like. They're all your favorite.
"I don't like the red ones," he mumbles, not quite looking at you, "But you do, right?"
You grin, pulling a gummy bear out of the bag and biting off its head to put it out of its misery humanely. "The red ones are the best, you're weird for that."
He scoffs, "The cute ones always have bad taste."
"I think you're complimenting yourself with that one." You pop the rest of the gummy into your mouth. "Orange lover."
"The orange ones are objectively--"
"They're all the acidic parts of a real orange without the orangey-ness."
Billy looks over at you. "Orangey-ness?" He's convinced he's heard this argument more times than anyone else alive, but your points are usually a little better.
You glare, pulling another gummy out of your bag. "You're not a part of this, you like the pineapple ones."
Stu laughs, "He also likes grape flavored stuff."
You gasp like Stu just outed Billy as a criminal. "No way."
"Yeah, yeah," he mumbles, already tired, "Make fun of me."
And after a second, he realizes that he really means it. If you're not mad at them, he can handle it.
----
A/n i never know if i should use the final girl tag list for fics that are set in the final girl world (if that makes sense), bc it's an update technically but also not bc it's not the main fic??
idk i've seen other writers on here tag for more than just the main fic and i'm always happy to be tagged in stuff but idk if that's for everyone lol,, lmk if you have any thought!
#scream x reader#final girl fic#scream 1996#stu macher#stu macher x reader#billy loomis#billy loomis x reader#ghostface#ask#poly! ghostface#poly!ghostface x reader
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anti | shuri udaku.
masterlist
ƸӜƷ
inspo — anti by rihanna
warnings — lots of remorse, lots of regret, lots of angst, grief, self-destructive!shuri, mean!shuri, crying like lots of fucking crying lol, singer!reader, avoidant!reader, crybaby!reader, soft!shuri, heartbroken!reader, spiralling, toxic!shuri, fingering, cunnilingus, possessive!shuri, confident!reader, sub!reader, kissing, implied smut, lovesick!reader, cold!shuri, nightmares, MAJOR CHARACTER DEATH, unhealthy coping mechanisms, partying, lots of heartbreak, dom!shuri, handsy!shuri, dirty talk, humiliation kink, tribbing, switch!reader, toxic relationships, dealer!shuri, best friend!shuri, alcohol, HARD DRUGS (ecstasy, acid, weed etc.), minor injuries, brat tamer!shuri, bratty!reader, spitting, vulgar language, lots of pet names, claiming kink, overstimulation, promiscuous!reader, touchy!reader, reader is a tease, sweet!shuri, fugitive!reader, enhanced!reader, toxic!reader, dom!reader, sub!shuri (i am going to tryyy u guys i can’t promise i'll do her justice lol), mean!reader, co-dependency, possessive!reader, jealous!reader, bratty!shuri ahem, begging, orgasm denial, established relationship, shy!reader, voice kink, verbal kink, needy!reader, degradation, dacryphilia, mommy kink (this is such an embarrassing projection but the voices won yall), dumbification, dismissive kink, love kink, slight objectification n slut-'shaming' (it’s still fond), overall just a lot of emotional constipation.
a/n — ehem so rihanna got me yall, i was debating posting the next stargirl chapter or working on this n she won me over yall !! anyway, this is my next set, it’s been sitting in my drafts 4ever n its definitely outta my comfort zone; there’s a lot of angst n vulnerability, way less smut, hardly any fluff (get on rih for this truly) but i hope its still enjoyable 4 yall lol.
oh p.s bc of the emotional toll /sarc, i didn’t do one for every song!!
⟢˚ @mbakuetshurisprincess @inmyheadimobsessed @letitias-fav @barkbarkbo @shurismainbxtch @verachii @rxcently @shuriszn @lppriceisright @heartsforjojo @motheroffae @naomis-daydream @vampzxi @nrc16783 @msplayas @marsolgy @mysticalmarss @playhousedistee @abenomeiiii @ma4erickk @ogbells16 @6-noir @laurensmabel1 @vexoshuri @saintwrld @zayswriting @ilovelulu @sookiesookie @ziayamikaelson
must be love on the brain, baby, keep loving me.
ஜ
✶ JAMES JOINT — "you know i’m no good for you, baby."
⊹ ۪ .⟢⋆｡˚.
in which the reader desperately wants more with shuri, despite the girl being the best friend everyone knows isn’t the best influence on her.
...coming soon
✶ KISS IT BETTER — "let me make it better, my love."
⊹ ۪ .⟢⋆｡˚.
in which shuri lets her grief influence her idea of love enough for it to consume her n reader can’t seem to empty the overflowing glass of their fracturing relationship before it starts to drown her too.
...coming soon
✶ WORK — "come on, you’re not done singing for them, pretty."
⊹ ۪ .⟢⋆｡˚.
in which promiscuous reader likes to taunt the pretty girl she doesn’t think can handle her, but she doesn’t know how much the panther likes the chase; especially when it’s bratty girls that fall apart so prettily.
...coming soon
✶ DESPERADO — "but there’s nothing here for me anymore, shuri, don’t you get that?"
⊹ ۪ .⟢⋆｡˚.
in which shuri udaku makes a choice in the name of her nation but the regret has her questioning her decision until it’s too much to overlook n reader lets the cruelty of the world cement her heart until her past comes back to chip the façade away.
...coming soon
✶ WOO — "say that again to my face, princess."
⊹ ۪ .⟢⋆｡˚.
in which reader’s cold and mean persona gives shuri a high she’s never felt before n reader likes how much the soft and pretty royal can’t seem to get enough of her.
...coming soon
✶ NEEDED ME — "you can do better than that, angel."
⊹ ۪ .⟢⋆｡˚.
in which reader set on making her girlfriend say how much she needs her, but shuri can’t seem to quell her ego enough to get the words out until reader decides to use her own ways against her.
...coming soon
✶ YEAH, I SAID IT — "use those fucking words if you want me to give you what you need, baby.”"
⊹ ۪ .⟢⋆｡˚.
in which reader basks in the tenderness shuri shows her, despite being the deadliest black panther the present world has witnessed, but when she sees her sweet shuri in a way she’s normally not privy to, the image makes her crave the panther.
...coming soon
✶ SAME OL’ MISTAKES — "no? lie to me again, s’thandwa sam’. you know there’s a part of you that craves the hurt."
⊹ ۪ .⟢⋆｡˚.
in which shuri is battling her own demons n reader finds herself letting old habits die hard because of love, once again.
...coming soon
✶ NEVER ENDING — "i can’t love you the way you deserve."
⊹ ۪ .⟢⋆｡˚.
in which heartbroken reader has closed herself off from love but didn’t fortify the penitentiary housing her heart from a certain agile panther.
...coming soon
✶ LOVE ON THE BRAIN — "then stop looking at me like i hung the fucking stars in the sky, my love."
⊹ ۪ .⟢⋆｡˚.
in which world renowned singer reader is known for her independent, ‘savage’ persona but when she’s in shuri’s bed her artist mind seems to forget what it means to see people as they are in reality.
...coming soon
✶ CLOSE 2 U — "because that’s what we were supposed to be, right? ...each other’s everything?”
⊹ ۪ .⟢⋆｡˚.
in which reader's performance of her new single, dropped unexpectedly after a twelve month hiatus of absolute silence, thrusts the world into a turmoil of emotions n shuri just wants to make things better.
...coming soon
✶ GOODNIGHT GOTHAM — "bast, please. only if for a night."
⊹ ۪ .⟢⋆｡˚.
in which shuri thinks grief can’t taunt her if she buries its effects; even the ones she swore she would never forget.
...coming soon
✶ POSE — "you're a dream, angel, use those pretty eyes."
⊹ ۪ .⟢⋆｡˚.
in which reader books the shoot of a lifetime n her photographer happens to be her longtime crush, shuri udaku.
...coming soon
#pinkwrighting ⊹ ۪ ᖭི༏ᖫྀ.#🎀. pink sets ⚘ ˏ`୭̥*#shuri udaku#letitia wright#shuri x black!reader#black panther#black panther wakanda forever#shuri x reader#shuri angst#shuri fluff#shuri smut#shuri x fem!reader#shuri x you#princess shuri#shuri imagine#letitia wright shuri
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HII i was wondering if you could do some hcs like you did for Kyle and Kenny but with Craig?? No pressure ofc! 💗
HEADCANNONS
cw: drug use, drinking, smoking, slight nsfw
AGED UP TO 18 PEOPLE
a/n: hiya! so in the head cannons craig is with tweek but obviously in the relationship ones he’s with reader xx
i’m also in my craig era rn! hope u like this anon <3
Craig Tucker
- I’m a firm believer in Peruvian Craig!
- He was adopted by Laura and Thomas but Tricia is their biological child.
- Struggled a lot with identity issues when growing up because he didn’t know much about his birth family.
- Laura being the angel she is worked extra hard to make sure Craig was in touch with his birth culture. Took him to a lot of events and tried to cook the food to the best of her ability.
- Out of all the families in South Park I think the Tucker family is the healthiest.
- Craig decided to not put a label on his sexuality. He just wants to go with the flow and see where life takes him.
- That being said it took a long time for him to accept he was attracted to guys. He had a lot of internalised homophobia because of the culture in South Park.
- He was petrified when he realised he had feelings for Tweek.
- I think his family were his rock during this time.
- Still flips everyone off. He thinks it’s peak humour (dumbass).
- Plays football 100%
- Dies when he sees that Tweek is cheering for him on the sidelines.
- Has a touch of the tism (lol).
- I think he really struggles to verbalise his emotions so he sticks to physical touch and acts of service.
- I think he’d probably also plays violin he finds it super calming.
- Listens to R&B.
- Goes to the gym a lot it relieves his stress.
- Goes for runs when he can’t go to the gym.
- Gets a job at Tweek bros and all the grandmas love him.
- Tea drinker!! His favourite is chamomile and honey.
- Tries to do some boxing with Tweek. Gets beat up by Tweek.
- Plays Roblox religiously.
- Likes cooking but hates baking.
- Wears slippers in the house like a little meemaw.
- I think he’d sell vapes on the dl lmao.
- HATES school dances but his friends force him to go anyway.
- Might not act like it but would die for his friends, he has a super soft spot for Clyde. They have been bestfriends for years.
- I head cannon he would become a firefighter lol (i have a fic idea in my head like firefighter!craig and paramedic!reader lol).
- Is still super obsessed with astronomy.
- But absolutely hates astrology he thinks it’s so dumb.
- Will go to the planetarium very often.
- Still wears his hat all the time. But in high school learnt to style his hair so started wearing it less often.
- Smokes weed with Kenny.
- Takes his alcohol well but gets super clingy when he’s drunk.
- He would say he hates parties but somehow is always at them.
- He HATES reading.
- Prob had to be tutored by Kyle during high school.
- Kenny pierced his nose.
- Has a good relationship with Tricia even though they bicker a lot. He takes her for ice cream.
- Loves kids but they find him intimidating lol.
- Is really good at calming babies down (meow).
- Royal blue is his favourite colour.
- Got into the bad habit of smoking cigarettes after having a fight with Tweek.
- Would have sleepovers with Tweek often. They make breakfast together 🥹
- He starts doing media in high school and buys a video camera. Makes little montages of his family and friends. Probably makes them for his friends birthdays as well. (this head cannon is inspired by the fic “ladies and gentlemen we are now floating in space” on ao3, go read it bc it changed my life).
- Plays chess.
- Listens to classical music.
- Likes hiking and discovering new trails.
- Guilty pleasure is Dolly Parton!!!!
- Avid milk drinker makes fun of others for drinking alternative milks.
- Grows flowers and gives them to Tweek. It takes ages cause he always forgets and they end up dying.
- Only drinks room temperature water.
- He has so many tattoos that Tweek designed (my head cannon is that Tweek is really good at art).
- Fucker is tall. 6’2!!!
- Is pretty defined from all the physical activity he does.
- When he’s older he rides a motorcycle.
- Exclusively wears converse. All his friends draw and write on them.
Craig in a relationship
- Okay let’s get down to business hehehe.
- Once again my major head cannon is firefighter!craig and paramedic!reader.
- He is super affectionate with you because that’s how he verbalises his love for you.
- Will do little things for you like tie your shoes or refill your water bottle without you asking.
- Absolutely froths when you wear his letterman jacket.
- He loves linking pinkies with you.
- He has a polaroid of y’all in his phone case.
- You guys have sleepovers often!
- You, him and Tweek go on day trips together.
- He’s not the best at consoling you when you’re upset but he really tries
- Y’all play Roblox together.
- He sends you gym gain updates (meow).
- Loves when your head is on his chest, he strokes your hair.
- Y’all always share headphones whenever you go anywhere.
- You are his passenger princess!!!
- He’s pretty experienced with sex. Loves making you feel good!
- Will hold your hand during sex he finds it super intimate.
- Is super insecure that you’ll leave him for someone who’s better at dealing with their emotions.
- I think he might have a tendency to blow up during arguments. He kinda shoves his feelings down so it all comes out during arguments.
- Goes for a run after y’all fight.
- Also head cannon that he will be super protective over you if you’re pregnant 🥹
- Would love to have a mini version of you guys running around.
- Likes to stargaze with you in the back of his truck.
- Y’all go camping together and roast s’mores on the fire.
- You beg him to go midnight swimming. He caves cause he can’t say no to you.
- Bends down to give you kisses.
- Loves holding your waist or hips.
- Holds your face in both his hands and gives you tender kisses on your nose.
- Will literally body slam you on the mattress cause he thinks it’s hilarious.
- You guys and Tweek have movie nights super often.
- When he falls in love he’s in deep.
- Will propose to you under the stars.
- Makes a video of all your friends saying happy birthday and a heartfelt message from him. Makes you cry for hours.
- Will pick you up when he hugs you.
- You braid Tricia’s hair and go get your nails done together.
- His parents adore you. Laura is a second mum to you.
- All in all Craig is super in love with you 10/10 boyfriend.
#south park x reader#craig tucker#craig tucker x reader#craig tucker headcannons#south park creek#south park headcannons#meow meow i love him
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Love song.
Pairing: soft!Ao'nung x female!metkayina!reader
CW: fluff!!! <3, unrequited love (reader doesn't know Ao'nung loves her too), angst, kinda innocent/pure vibes
I got inspired to write this after looking at a lovely gift of Ao'nung smiling and remembering one of my favorite Evanescence songs, "You". The reader sings the song, but, in the story, the lyrics and melody are her creation. Also, I realize that this is almost an AU bc ao'nung is sweet af here and well lol he ain't in the canon version (unless he'd be like that for his mate only ahahah)
༄♡
After the eclipse, you were standing inside the ocean, with the cold water covering up to your hips, alone. You started to trace the waters with your fingers, while thinking about the silly boy you loved.
"Oh, Ao'nung, if only you knew.." The words echoed in the night
You had a little song that you had composed, Ao'nung being your inspiration. You were a great singer. It had been so since you were a little child. The people would ask you to sing for them.
The melody started to come alive, coming out of your throat:
And I can't sleep, I need to tell you... goodnight
When we're together I feel perfect
When I'm pulled away from you I fall apart
All that you say is sacred to me
Your eyes are so blue, I can't look away as we lay in the stillness
You whisper to me:
(y/n), marry me, promise you'll stay with me
Oh, you don't have to ask me, you know you're all that I live for
You know I'd die just to hold you, stay with you
Somehow I'll show you that you are my night sky
I've always been right behind you
That was all you had come up with until that moment, so, you sighed and stopped singing.
You were looking over to the deeper waters in front of you and thinking about diving in when you heard a familiar voice say:
"Now I know." It was Ao'nung, standing in the sand, smiling at you
He walked slowly into the water, eyes still on you, smile still on his face. You heard the water sounds his body made while he moved and waited, frozen in your place.
When he finally arrived right in from of you, he wasted no time and in less than a second grabbed you by the waist and started kissing you. He kissed you hard. You melted at his mouth and started kissing him back. Soft lip smacking sounds could be heard in the air, as he savored the way you tasted in his tongue. He held you tight, your body glued to his. You could feel his heart beating fast inside of his chest and so did yours. He breathed deep, lips still on yours. His tongue touched your lips and you opened your mouth. Ao'nung licked your tongue over and over, feeling you do the same to his. He finally let go of your lips, out of breath.
"Oel ngati kameie." (I see you)
He said, touching his chest
"Oel ngati kameie" You answered, looking deep into his light blue eyes. They were more beautiful than any part of the sea you had ever seen.
He smiled slightly, showing no teeth, and you smiled wide, your fangs touching your lower lip.
"You're so cute." He said, rubbing the skin of your cheek with his thumb
He leaned closer, still touching your face, and kissed you again. His lips were so soft, wet and warm. You felt like you were dreaming but it was reality, this time.
The lyrics that were missing to complete your song came suddenly to your head:
Now that you love me I love myself
I never thought I would say that
I never thought there'd be you
༄♡
My heart was hurting in a good way while I wrote this 🥲
Please, like and/or reblog this post if you liked it and leave a comment telling me what you think 💙
#avatar x reader#avatar imagine#atwow#avatar twow#avatar aonung#aonung#aonung x you#aonung x reader#aonung x female reader#ao'nung x you#ao'nung x y/n#ao'nung x reader#ao'nung#na'vi x y/n#na'vi x reader#na'vi avatar#avatar james cameron#avatar pandora#avatar fic#avatar fandom#avatar fanfiction#kxamtxomaw writes
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What about virgin Cass and Rhys the absolute menaces 😂 I wonder how that would go.
Omg thank you for asking!! Let’s explore this can of worms 🥴😈
Rhys is the first to lose his virginity because he’s the High Lords son. He’s flirtatious and smooth. He’s like Dorian at the beginning of tog, sweet and chivalrous but a horn dog with many lovers. He used to flirt with the daughters of nobility who were older than him and he loved making them blush.
Women have always found him beautiful and he could tell bc of how they reacted but also bc of his daemati powers. So Rhys has quite the ego even before he’s ever bedded a female. He’s considerate and attentive but keeps his emotions to himself and doesn’t get attached.
His first time is with a Lord’s daughter from his father’s court. He absolutely kept it to himself that it was his first time lmao. He’s very exploratory and isn’t shy about it. Obviously he’s not as good at it as he becomes later, but his curiosity alone helps him satisfy the girl bc he wants to try so much, even if he’s already finished.
Like not to get too explicit but even if he got his, he’d be eager to do a lot of other things literally out of curiosity and that gets the job done for the girl. Rhys tells Cassian all about it after. Cassian listens carefully and wants to bed a woman at that point.
So Cass was the second. Less confident than Rhys but a gentle giant even as a young man. I see him being super into girls and flirting openly, talking himself up and when he actually manages to talk a girl into taking him home, he’s more in over his head than he anticipated. His sweetness makes up for the fact that he didn’t make the girl finish. Months later when he gets good at it, he goes back to her to satisfy her properly.
I can see Cass getting slightly emotionally attached to the girl he loses his virginity to, but he gets over it eventually. Cass goes back to the same lovers more frequently than Rhys does, and we know canonically that he’s the only one that’s had a serious relationship before.
Cassian and Rhys have an easier time showing their sweeter side to women in bed compared to Az, especially if they’re softer or shyer girls. Cassian would be more sweetness and Rhys is more charm, if that discernment makes sense. Cassian would be keenly aware of his hulking frame and try very hard to make it comfortable.
His and Azriel’s first times were at Windhaven with the girls at the camp. There was probably a lot of unabashed talk amongst the other young Illyrians at the camp about fucking women, and that’s where the guys learn about sex, so when they finally do it, they have a rough idea of what’s expected.
Though I feel like I did Az justice in my fic, I think it would likely be a little clumsier irl unless he lucked out and did it w a girl who knew what she was doing. I think he’d be eager to please and do it relatively well, but his more reserved nature would prevent much communication, and he’d be nervous for sure. He’d want to be gentle but wouldn’t quite know the words to say, but the intention is certainly there.
The main thing I tried showing in the fic is that he’s literally never known intimacy or gentleness, like he went from his prison cell to war camp. So when it comes to bedding a woman, he’s gonna be really taken aback by how soft it can be. He’d learn through practice over the years that there is gentleness to be found in intimacy.
I don’t see him being in literally any relationship outside of hookups bc he’s been in love w Mor for centuries, so a lot of his experiences with women and femininity comes from sex. He learns about being a gentleman from that. So sex becomes highly exploratory for him. That’s when he starts getting a little wilder lol but that comes a whileeee later.
He's very attentive and notices every detail and gets good at it pretty fast even if he doesn’t talk about it as freely as Cass or Rhys do. I see him using his shadows to help determine if the girl is enjoying herself.
Cassian tells feyre literally the day they meet her that he, Rhys, and Az all love fucking so this is absolutely an area Azriel let’s himself indulge in, especially bc he knows such little intimacy in his life outside sex.
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Talk Hockey To Me
( @ghostgeno's tag game)
The thing that got you hooked on hockey
Started reading “hey now, you're an all star (get your game on, go play)” by @buckyismybicycle while it was ongoing because even though I was 1) completely uninterested in hockey and 2) also uninterested in Stucky as a ship, this specific author’s works have always been phenomenal and with each new chapter email I started getting more and more intrigued until I eventually gave in and started reading it (literally so worth it everyone should read it). In the end notes of each chapter, HR (the author) would add some fun facts and extra context for the hockey related stuff (considering it’s a whole hockey AU) that made me go “huh that sounds fun” more than once but I was still not super into the hockey thing.
Until.
I reached the chapter with a beautifully written match and I was like???? Is hockey like this irl?????????? This sounds so good?????????? Cue YouTube hacking into my brain and suggesting me hockey compilations which included the infamous Lick. I saw this random man just being a menace to everyone and decided he is now the love of my life. (i usually omit the stucky fic part bc ppl have opinions about marvel that i do not want to hear lol. so if i told you abt this before without the full context i'm sorry!!)
Your first ever fandom friend
@hard4softthings !!!! Love is stored in the ao3 comment section uwu
The jersey you would most like to own
I can’t pick one so I’m just gonna list in descending order: Marchand home jersey (with a C !!!!!!!!😤) , Pasternak (also home. Sorry it’s just nicer than the away version) , Quinn Hughes (the pride one because I’m obsessed with the design it’s so pretty)
YOUR player (you only get ONE so choose wisely)
The rat king himself 🖤💛🖤💛🖤 can u tell I have a favorite
A pairing that deserves more fic
Sid/Ovi ‼️ tuukks/pasta and Brady/Quinn too, there’s just so much potential for them.
Your favourite on-ice moment
Picking is difficult so you’re just gonna get a bunch <3.
Bertuzzi stealing cousin’s stick and trying to break it
Marchy kidnapping The Child
pigeon
dancing with the stars
tuukks Exhibiting homicidal tendencies (rightfully so)
flower wanting to feel included
whole team under arrest
Brady Tkachuk: why is there a fucking animal loose on the ice he’s going to give me rabies
marchy waving to a booing crowd
marchy blowing kisses to a booing crowd
flower asserting his dominance tripping TWO first round picks
Quinn Hughes seeing a fight break out and says ✨no✨
Marner spinning like a ballerina
+ link someone else's art/fic/etc that you love & think everyone should check out
ART:
this ADORABLE mcdrai art by @saviorified
MattMcDrai art by @adelphenium , obsessed with the blushing and the HAIR plz it’s so cute.
Awfully pretty sid and geno art by @ceanspam
Captaincy transfer by @adelphenium I’m so weak for rat marchy, and ALSO bergy’s eyes <33333 i’m so <33333
the kiss of life by @stillfertile
FICS:
The “All Caps” series by @makeit-takeit rewired my brain I’ve reread it countless times i think i can recite it by heart.
“hard to be soft, tough to be tender” The Hanahaki fic by @hardforsoftthings I love love love the emotional progression AND denial in both of these fics (also, horny. Thank u)
speaking of which, in less emotionally charged and more horny fics, the “spit cup” and “scratch that itch” non-traditional omegaverse doulogy by @ whitchbhitch (i do not know their tumblr)
+ link something you made & are proud of & want people to see
I’m honestly really proud of my flowertalbo fic, “Inevitably you will burn (as all living things do)” it’s really short (646 words) but I think I did a good job on it :>
Also, I find myself coming back to this one McDrai crack fic, “Oh Puck No!” idk what possessed me to write it but I had fun with it and i still find it silly and enjoyable lol
no pressure tags: @lindholmline @darkangel0410 @gilliebee @owchar1ie and anyone else who wanna do this!!!
#tag game#i'm not sure about the etiquette of tagging people i'm not familiar with but. yea#hope y'all don't mind <3
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Do you have any more hcs for Ghost? Maybe particularly if he got a crush or somethin (if you're comfy with that. if you aren't comfy, you can just do general hcs, I won't mind at all). I feel like I hc him too soft because I like soft but that doesn't really work with COD because these aren't particularly..... soft people. So I really like hearing more nitty gritty and rough stuff bc I think its more realistic. I also love your art and foam at the mouth so hard when I see it!!!!
First of all, thank you anon for the sweet comment about my art 🥺♥ And yes, with great pleasure! 🖤 Ghost has been my "OG" fave for an embarrasingly long part of my life and the character I imagine is by now an hybrid between 2009 mw2 & 2019 MW. Can't wait to see him more fleshed out in MWII. I'll try to two in one your request, and I hope you like this. I know he is a very dear character to many of us.
Rambles aside, here goes: Ghost headcanons!
...Putting these under the cut because it got VERY long oops I love him too much…
Ok so the main thing I headcanon is that he survived Loose Ends. I KNOW that's not canon with the reboot, let alone "survivable" at all in mw2 but this is how things have been cooking in my mind in the past 11 years lol. He survived being shot in the stomach and escaped the fire. Smoke inhalation fucked up his voice though (laryngeal burns are a real thing, and it also "explains" the changed voice lol). He's got burn scars albeit not extensive thanks to his gear.
With all that in mind, he's got like 10 layers of issues, and the first one is that he's a complete control freak, half due to his upbringing and half cos of the "betrayed and almost died" part.
Ghost is both a very focused, cold-headed and efficient soldier... AND the most prone to go AWOL in TF141. If the orders clash with his very strong and personal set of values and morals, he'll either do his thing or vanish. Price is on thin, THIN fucking ice and knows it.
Actual anger issues. The exact opposite of Nikto: Ghost lashes out verbally, never physically. He gets upset really really fast and you'll Hear It. He raises his voice immediately - and he hates that he does it.
A more lighthearted hc that I hold on to dearly: literally so funny when he wants. Sarcasm master but also knows how to deliver a joke with the good tone and a completely unfazed expression. He's a great actor and he's hilarious.
No culinary taste or talent at all but he just straight up doesn't bother trying. Could eat military rations every day.
He's naturally bossy as hell. So, when Ghost has a soft spot for someone, you can see it immediately because he's noticeably Less Bossy. He's the guy who literally cannot hide his soft spots.
His trust is hard earned but runs deep. He absolutely loves his team. He's a reliable friend, colleague, teammate, just watch your damn step because he's loyal, but unforgiving.
Harbours respect for anyone outright. Never underestimates or belittles anyone except for his hierarchy. (Surprising, isn't it.)
He falls asleep easily in the evening… because he's exhausted. His days are spent observing things, shaping his actions along as to know exactly what are their consequences, even for something as minor as like, making food. It's the OCD baby. And it fucking drains you.
He likes when people are defiant. He takes an almost immediate liking to people who think maybe a bit too independentely for the military, in fact.
Weirdly enough, doesn't really like animals. Not the dog person you'd expect him to be.
Bonus: I don't really have a face hc for him. To me he is just his balaclava lol. But I imagine him with dark hair + dark eyes, looking like a regular bloke, not particularly handsome or unique looking. five o'clock shadow, a couple acne scars and, in fact, very kind eyes. Also tall (6'3/193cm) and lanky. [EDIT post-MWII: this one aged terribly but I am in fact 100% adopting his new looks]
#also imo soft and gritty nitty can cohabit and no one should feel ashamed for having like#wholesome hcs or stories. To me that's the magic of fandoms#I do enjoy irredeemable bastards but I reckon you'll see I have a SOFT spot for ghost.#ask#headcanons#ghost#call of duty
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lengthy ask anon here - i am currently freezing bc holy shit what is going on in the states rn negative degree weather sucks. also! i had to change my alarm and there was a windchime option which made me cackle lol
i hope this week is less stressful! and yes, therapy is the answer to everything lol well that, and the beautiful images you put in our heads bc the image of bea planning a surprise birthday party (and being huffy at her imperfect cake that ava thinks is perfect) my heartttt
speaking of cold - just how cold does it get in that town? curious if you came across that in your research
i love the thought you put in to choosing patatas bravas! does bea have a favorite food? also does she have a favorite food amongst ava's repertoire?
i was rereading and in chap 3, ava asks bea if she's ever been arrested (i still love the fact that she got into a bar brawl lol) but has ava ever been arrested??
also in chap 5 (storm scene, my beloved!), bea asks ava what she's afraid of (and hard agree, cockroaches - the flying ones esp - are fucked up) but what's bea afraid of?
do you have a favorite pun from the lighthouse au?
i'm gonna go make hot chocolate, too cold for iced hot chocolate but i will pretend i'm somewhere warm enough to have that. sending you good vibes and uneventful days!
me [living in a tropical country]: negative degree weather 🥺
hi lengthy ask anon, i have no idea how long it’s been 💀 lost all concept of time the moment 2024 decided to press fast forward akdbskd but i’m alive and still happy to answer questions!
1. negative 20s if i remember correctly! i had no idea how to write that kind of weather so i set it in… spring 😂 which is when i also started writing it. had to bookmark the weather of the location lmao
2. i tried to pinpoint a favorite food for bea, but i made myself sad doing it skdbs cos i was trying to go back to her childhood and then went “wouldn’t the food be tasteless if she’s having meals alone or with a family like that?” 😭 why am i like this 😭 but as for ava’s menu, i’d say she’s partial to anything they can make together because,,, soft gay lmao so nothing too complicated bec bea in the kitchen is a disaster waiting to happen. omelettes? bacon and waffles? literally anything even a 7-year-old can help with 💀
3. FOR STREAKING DEFINITELY 😭 dunno why but it’s the first thing that popped in my head
4. skin-deep level? worms probably. just because they wriggle and because she absolutely hates accidentally touching them 💀 soul-deep level? rejection. too many times from too many people just sows that in you ajdhsjd also storm scene, also my beloved, i waited so long to write that [sigh]
5. i was gonna say “legen-dairy” before realizing that’s a whole other fic (i’m fine obviously) but for lighthouse au, i think “it shore is bea-utiful” just because it was an all-in-one 😂
[lifts my mug of lukewarm coffee bec it’s too hot to drink boiling liquid] cheers lengthy ask anon. i hope the hot chocolate was warm and sweet 🥹 and i hope you’ve been having a good month!!!
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thanks so much for responding to my ask about Ryo x Minoru!! the stuff you wrote was so cute, especially the “this could be us”picture (I 100% could see Minoru sending that) also the idea you had of them kissing because they thought they were gonna die…your mind omg. I could also see them doing one of those “thank god we’re alive” kisses where they thought they were gonna die but when they live they’re so happy and that the other person is happy that they just. smooch lol
also I did see that other post you made about them and I loved it! but it’s funny that you see everyone being shocked when they say they’re together because I hc that they’d both be super obvious even when they try to hide that they like each other (esp Minoru, the word subtle isn’t in that boy’s dictionary). if either of them confided in Kaito for whatever reason, I can 100% picture him saying in the most deadpan voice, “congrats, you’re officially the last one to know.” I think it would specifically be obvious because they’d talk about each other all the time, even if it was about things that “annoyed” them and then trying too hard to play it cool by immediately following up with “not that I care about him or anything!!!1!” or something like that.
I just think they’re neat and I’m honestly surprised that there aren’t more people who ship them. like they spend a good amount of time together, they both have come running when the other one is distressed, and I also noticed that falcomon is the only kemonogami who can understand kunemon, and since the kemonogami represent their partner’s hearts, I feel like it shows that they both understand each other. also if Minoru gets captured by dokugumon in chapter 1, ryo will complain about Minoru being a pain, which makes Minoru mad, but falcomon reassures him that Ryo’s just making such a fuss because he was worried about Minoru (which Ryo denies and gets embarrassed over ofc).
on a less serious note, I feel like they would be kinda like those two old guys from the muppets once they start dating where they bond over roasting other people/each other. I also get reminded of them when I see that one post where it’s like “I had a crush on someone in my class and didn’t know how to deal with it so I just wrote a letter that said ‘get out of my school.’” like they both are soft™️ on the inside but have such a hard time expressing it.
sorry i totally rambled about them but it’s just nice to see someone else who ships this rare pair!! i wish more people enjoyed it/wrote about it! I literally made one of those dumb comic sans powerpoints about them one day because I was bored and because digimon survive hyperfixation™️ and because i freakin love them. so thanks so much, i really appreciate it!! 💕
Y'know what anon, I see the vision. I see the poorly concealed crush disguised as annoyance. Them thinking everyone would be surprised only to be met with "guys we literally all knew." I love that we both decided they would not shut up about each other though XD
AND DUDE YEAH I LOVE THAT SCENE. EVEN IN THE BEGINNING WHEN THEY DIDN'T GET ALONG WELL AT ALL RYO WAS STILL WORRIED ToT
Also 100% in love with the idea of their partners being a reflection of how well they get each other. You're so big brained aaaaaah.
They absolutely would talk shit together lmao. Mean old ladies on a porch swing except they're both teenage boys XD Also why are they actually both the "he's bullying you because he likes you" one in the relationship ToT
I am dying to know about this powerpoint lakdjfakj I also am surprised more people don't ship it tbh like at least for me they are like THE pairing from the game that falls the most into my usual preferred tropes. Annoyances to friends to lovers. Sunshine x grumpy except they're both a little grumpy. "He's an idiot but he's MY idiot." Rowdy boys. "I hate you (affectionate)." They're so good together. They should kith.
ALSO BC YOU SAID "not that I care about him or anything!!!1!" YOU REMINDED ME OF SOMETHING NOT QUITE RELATED BUT FUNNY ENOUGH TO SHARE. ONE TIME WHEN I WAS COHOSTING MY FRIEND'S SURVIVE STREAM, I WAS VOICING RYO, AND SOMEONE CALLED HIM A TSUNDERE, SO--
I should provide further context that she has a point redeem for talking in a high pitched voice so that's why we were talking like that lmao.
AND ONE LAST THING: DO NOT APOLOGIZE FOR RAMBLING I AM LITERALLY SO THRILLED TO READ SOMEONE ELSE'S CUTE HC'S ABOUT THEM <3
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DO THE OC QUESTIONS ILY
AHHHH OKAY OKAY ILY
I'll do this for Sif first bc I have severe Sif brainrot rn. I'll get around to Ophyx and my upcoming OC at some point lol
Are there any names they like to be called in bed/names they call their partner? Any names they wouldn’t use/can’t stand? - Sif has an extreme soft spot for pet names like "darling", "my love", "my sweet" and things of that nature. She'd use them for her lover and would enjoy her lover using them for her. There aren't really any names she particularly dislikes.
Are they a “the socks stay on during sex” kind of person? - Absolutely not
Quickies vs Planned sex—thoughts? - Quickies are fun between battles, during baths, cleaning up after dinner. An easy way to expel pent up frustrations. HOWEVER. Planned sex? So much more romantic. Candles and a good meal, setting the mood with music and slow foreplay. So much more preferable.
Are they more of a dom, sub, or switch? If applicable, are they a top, bottom, or vers? - Sif is absolutely a sub/bottom in the bedroom. Inexperienced and shy, definitely one to cover her face and blush in embarrassment when told she's doing a good job, or at the noises she involuntarily makes.
Do they have any really out-of-left-field kinks/fantasies? Maybe even something that they wouldn’t necessarily want to act on but have still thought about? - I wouldn't consider it REALLY out of left field, but Sif constantly fantasizes about the typical princess in a tower scenario. Being rescued and ravaged by a handsome elf. Like I said, she's inexperienced, so I feel she could develop some really fucked up fantasies given the opportunity.
Any place they absolutely would not have sex? - Nope. Anywhere, everywhere, in front of people if the need arises. She may be shy, but she's awfully pent up and horny.
Are they into (consensual) pain during sex? Either giving or receiving - Absolutely into consensual pain. She discovered it by accident at first. Mostly receiving. Sif couldn't purposely hurt a fly if she tried.
How often do they have sex dreams? - At least 3 times a weak, mostly daydreams.
What’s their favorite way to get in the mood? How do they set the mood? - Sif is big into a slow burn. Touches in passing that turn into tight embraces. Soft kisses that turn into tongue fighting, teeth clacking, swollen lips makeout sessions. She's big into touch of any kind. Running fingers up thighs and over breasts, playing with the goosebumps that speckle her or her lover's skin.
Are they down for casual one-night stands? - Not really. She falls too hard, too quickly.
Are they attracted to anyone (specific person or just negative qualities) they really shouldn’t be? - Not entirely. I don't really know how to expand on this because the way she falls in love is so pure, I don't think she has it in her to see red flags haha. She just sees the good in anyone and everyone. She falls for the little things.
Would they be more or less likely to send a risky/risque text to their partner in the middle of a crowded/public area? - Absolutely. She's one hell of a tease.
Morning vs evening sex—do they have a preference? - Either one, honestly. Morning sex is slow and sweet, still blinking the sleep from their eyes, little yawns between moans. Evening sex can be more filthy and grimy.
If they send nudes, are they tasteful or just quick pics? - Tasteful. Even artful, given the time.
Describe their favorite sexual encounter. - Her first sexual encounter is with Karlach, so it's very new and warm and careful. A little bit awkward. It'll always remain her favorite.
Describe their least favorite/most embarassing sexual encounter. - N/A
What’s their go-to safe word? - I have not given this ANY thought but honestly.. It would be something stupid like "Balsam" or something like that ahahaha
Their favorite actions during sex—chin-grabbing, hair-pulling, wrists being pinned, etc. - Sif loves being pinned down and forced to maintain eye contact. Whether it be by her lover holding her chin/jaw, choking her so she can't move, or pinning her wrists above her head.
When they “dress-up” for sex, what’s their go-to outfit? Lingerie, suit, gown, etc.? - Honestly just a silk robe that's just long enough to cover her bottom and is loosely tied so her small perky breasts show just a little. Always green
What do they like seeing their partner in when they “dress-up?” - She'd prefer to just watch them undress from their everyday clothes, or to undress them herself. Nothing special
What scent of candle do they light after sex? - Sandalwood, oak, anything woodsy and fresh
Favorite thing/part about sex—intimacy, role-playing, etc. - Sif's favorite part, by far, is the foreplay. The build up. The dirty talk and wandering lips/hands
Least favorite thing/part about sex—cleanup, setup, etc. - The cleanup, always.
A song they would fuck/get fucked to - "I'll Keep Coming" - Low Roar
Share a sample line of dirty-talk - She isn't too great at dirty talk herself, but more expressing her love for her lover's existence. "Oak Father preserve me, you were sculpted in a perfect image."
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directors cut sort of?
if final girl was a tv show and you had to pick a song for the opening theme song what would it be?
i’m genuinely very curious if you think there’s a song out there that really wraps not just the readers, billy’s, and stu’s dynamic together but also the vibe of the series
or if you have songs that you think represent characters individually?
anyway would loooove to know what your talented self listens to 💕
i got the notfiication for this and IMMEDIATELY stopped doing homework,, a lot of my writing inspo/motivation comes from music so i have a lot of thoughts
okay i have to preface this by saying that i am unfortunately not a cool, original indie music girly, i would LOVE to be, but i'm aware that it's not true to who i am at the moment 😭
as far as theme song, i think it's hard to nail one that i think is perfect bc i want the traditional slasher vibes and the heart of the story to be captured so i have 5 choices (that i can defend i promise 😭):
Verse 3 of I Know the End, Phoebe Bridgers - ik this song got tiktok-ified but i loved it before that 😭 i think these lyrics and the overall production provide both the kind of ominous urgency of a life and death situation situation while still packing a gut punch that doesn't seem to have a definite source, like when you hear that verse you know there's something tragic going on and you know you're hurt over it, but you can't figure out why
Verse 1 and Chorus of Ballad of a Homeschooled Girl, Olivia Rodrigo - that entire song is just so Y/n and I think the production is kind of "active"/energetic(?) enough to encompass more of the theme
Refrain 1 and (mainly) Pre-chorus of Happiness is a Butterfly, Lana Del Rey - a DRASTIC change in direction ik, and it might seem too soft, but the "if he's a serial killer then what's the worst..." verse is too literal, too good for me to not at least mention as an option,, like it's too real
First verse (or maybe the bridge) of The Love Club, Lorde - I'm on the fence about this one bc the cheerful/more pop sound doesn't fully fit the way I see the final girl fic aesthetic/vibe, but I love Lorde so it got some extra points lol. I think pairing this "clique" that should be a good with the bloody/violent visuals created by the lyrics has potential for a final girl vibe though, especially the first verse.
The Chorus of Nymphology by Melanie Martinez - this one shifts the framing a little but it’s great at summarizing what it’s like to be manic pixie dream girl-ified and implies something bad happening/being forced onto said manic pixie dream girl, so i think it works a little
So music that reminds me of the individual characters are different than what i think they'd listen to, that's a very important clarification!
This is a little less concrete to me, I've mentioned it before that Billy reminds me of Mastermind by Taylor Swift, he also reminds me of Writer in the Dark by Lorde (“I am my mother’s child, i love you till my breathing stops, i love you till you call the cops on me” is PERFECT for him idc)
i feel very strongly that Stu is Mirrorball (by Taylor Swift),, like he premeditates his actions based on getting attention (good or bad) and would literally kill someone before letting anyone find out
i wanted to give Y/n a taylor swift song so that it'd all match up, but i think it's so much more fitting to make her the odd one out in the trio and say that she's in her Olivia Rodrigo Era, she reminds me so much of Guts, she reminds me of Ballad of a Homeschool Girl (which is why it's one of the theme songs lol), and she will be relating to Making the Bed and vampire before the story ends 😭
omg if any of you have any thoughts on songs that would work as a final girl theme song or songs that remind you of the characters individually pls let me know!!
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Hello!!! For the Sinday Sunday Ask! For my favorite fic The Boy, questions for the Shakarian couple on 🍏,🍎🍋🍌,🫐,🥝 Answer the questions you feel comfortable answering, have a good day, by the way your way of writing is very beautiful <3
Hello! Thanks for the ask, and the kind words!
1. Preference for top or bottom, sub or dom:
So for top/bottom: Garrus loves both, and being bi he has extensive experience with both. Jane has less experience bc she has less experience relationship wise in general, but she gets very into pegging once they start dating.
As for dom/sub, in my detective au Garrus leans dom and Jane leans sub, though they'll switch and play around. They just adore each other so much I think they both get too twitterpated while having sex to stick to any roles or plans 😁
2. Favorite type, looks, and personality wise?
Garrus is attracted to Jane's strong personality, confidence, soft heart, and her ability to take charge. He's attracted to her hair, hips, and waist, and especially her delicate places that bend (ankle, wrist, neck, back)
Jane is attracted to Garrus's heart, that fact that he's good at anything he tries, and his sense of humor. She's into his confident body language, seductive, pendulating hips, forearms, ass, voice...she's just really hot for him, all of him, haha.
3. Deep and slow? Hard and fast?
Yes, haha. They're just horny for each other. I think they both lean more towards deep, slow, tender, but also intense and passionate. Jane leans way more into rough stuff than Garrus. In the latest chapter (6) I teased that Jane will enjoy some pain/pleasure play specifically because she finds she's really into aftercare.
4. Favorite position?
Her in front, on her knees, against a wall or something else supportive (like the back of a couch) with him on his knees behind her. Or him sitting upright and her in his lap. These positions allow them to hold each other and kiss/nuzzle despite their massive height difference. (she's 5'8" and he's 7').
5. Clothes off or on?
They will take it anyway they can get it. But I think they both prefer buck fucking naked. That way they can enjoy gazing at every beautiful inch of each other. (yes they're the couple everyone rolls their eyes at)
6. Private Sexual fantasy
Oh this is a hard one 😁 Well, during The Boy specifically, Garrus fantasizes most about getting Jane naked and running his tongue along sweet, sensitive spots on her body, like her ankle, wrist, and lower back. Jane fantasizes most about giving him a bj. She's a simple lady, and a giver, lol.
Alright, bless anyone who read this whole thing because I rambled like a ninny. Thanks again for asking, Anon. Hope you enjoyed these answers, and take care 😊
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opened tumblr at the right time lol. re ur veg tasting good tags - roasting is a 10/10 way to make veg taste better. i used to (too disabled now) make curried carrots, you slice them into slightly long circles (cut /// rather than |||) give them a little bath of oil & curry powder & salt/pepper and then stick them on a foiled tray in the oven for a whack. i wish i could rmr the time & temp but it was an online recipe so it’s probably findable if it appeals. but i loved them! generally its some oil and something additional (altho sometimes thats just salt or and pepper) and whack them in the oven. there was one i did which was like charred roasted veg which got me to eat bell pepper, think it was oil and italian herb mix? and salt & pepper. but yeh. it makes them more sweet & while they are soft it’s different from how boiled are soft bc youve got the skin with a different texture than all mushy? hard to explain really
ok so uh part 2 ig? but i googled the carrots thing and its curry roasted carrots on budget bytes dot com if you were interested. very easy to do, i was doing like one carrot or two carrots just for myself & having it as a snack sometimes (making dinner and making a veg was too much energy atp so i was doing it separately w ready/microwave meals which are often veg-less)
oh my god thank you for these! i'll try them after my surgery this week, i gotta go on clear fluids for a few days for that but afterwards i'm definitely jumping at the chance to try something new for veg! having hated veg my entire life and being a grown ass adult it's super embarrassing and if i can just find a way to eat them that i like i feel like it'll take a whole lot of pressure and humiliation off of me. thank youuu <3
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