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#( they tried to make me go to rehab )
eattherichplease · 8 months
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13thpythagoras · 9 months
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pinkfey · 2 years
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my pos br*ther woke me up at 6AM bc he’s playing video games so fucking loudly and our walls are made of paper and no matter how much i tell him i need to sleep he doesn’t hear me through his headset 😐😐😐 i am just sitting here fml
#straight up yelling about his fantasy life where he was enlisted in the military (he wasn’t) to make some random mfs impressed#swearing up a storm which isn’t allowed in my parents christian household#bitching about the left which also isn’t allowed in our household#but remember their rules don’t apply to their precious firstborn fuckup <33#i hate men yelling i hate men yelling i hate men yellingggg#I AM SO ANGRYYYYYY >:((((#i need to be up in two hours and he took that from me too lmao !! the one day i get to sleep in past six !! holy shit !! i hate him !!#*one hour now 🫠#‘but at least he’s not drinking 🥺’ ask me if i give a fuck i actually prefer him wasted bc at least that means he’s killing himself 🤩#like. he is such a fucking nuisance to live with. what’s funny about his pattern of abuse is how there IS no ‘good period’ where he tries t#make up for what he’s done. because that’s just his ‘sober period’ and he’s such a fucking ASSHOLE during even that that it’s like.#oh so this is you trying. this is the best you’ve got before you get pissed and continue abusing us physically and mentally.#he’s fucking pathetic oh my GOD#oh now he just pissed and didn’t wash his hands again. i am so full of venom rn i hate this man so much#27 year old grown ass man lying to teenage boys online to get male validation#can’t wash his hands after taking a piss despite the fact that he doesn’t shower for weeks on end#refusing to go to an SLE after rehab because he thinks he’s too good for it and ‘he’ll do better this time’ as if he wasn’t climbing out of#fucking windows to get wasted. as a twenty seven year old. touting about how he wants to die but don’t you dare get him help bc he doesn’t#want it. agreeing to rehab and then lying in order to be sent home bc he thinks he has control over an addiction and he in no way abuses hi#own fucking family. holy shit i’m making myself more angery but god i hate everything about him i hate EVERYTHING ABOUT HIM !!!!!!#anyways.txt#delete later
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alongtidesoflight · 1 year
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shinobicyrus · 20 days
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I've seen a lot of posts about Batman using his Bruce Wayne alter ego for the good of Gotham: job programs for felons released from prison, orphanages, charities, high wages for his employees, ethical business practices...the legendary post where Bruce Wayne goes to Wal-Mart.
Thus far I've never personally seen anybody really dig into the persona of Bruce Wayne the Billionaire Playboy. A handsome, rich, powerful man who always is seen at fancy galas, art openings, charity dinners, and wild parties with at least one beautiful woman on his arm.
We know Bruce Wayne is the mask, and its Batman who has a...complex love life, depending on the iteration we're talking about. Talia, Catwoman, sometimes Wonder Woman.
Bruce Wayne's dates, on the other hand, are all "normal" people. Maybe they're an aspiring actress, a supermodel, a prima ballerina, the occasional reporter...and every time there's that bit of nervousness at the start.
Sure everyone knows Bruce Wayne. Everyone knows the story with him. Sometimes his wilder parties make the news, but there's never really been anything nasty reported about him. Never...allegations. But he's a billionaire. He's one of the most powerful people in the whole city, nevermind the country. If he did have some skeletons in his closet. Well. Men with power have a way of making those kinds of stories go away, don't they?
As time goes on the Date's fears dissipate pretty quickly. Bruce Wayne is nothing but polite, kind, and at times charmingly awkward in an 'raised by his butler in a mansion' kind of way with his dates. Some of them can tell he's holding back, of course. Maybe the more perceptive Dates notice he's smarter than he lets on - playing the himbo or hamming up the "know-nothing rich boy" act to the cameras or some of his wealthy peers.
He also listens, is the thing. He's always listening to what they're saying, is interested in hearing about their careers, their hobbies, their lives. Really listens, too. Might refer to something a Date said weeks later off-hand. Buy out the whole museum for a private dinner date with a famous painting from an obscure artist they like, or a private performance with another's favorite band.
He has anecdotes and funny stories for days that somehow says very little about his personal life. The Dates know he has kids (it's practically a running gag in the news that Bruce Wayne has adopted yet another orphan) and maybe she might spot one of them at the mansion, but Bruce seems very keen to shelter them from any intense spotlight and scrutiny, and they all seem happy if a bit weird like him.
Eventually, there's drifting. He's a very busy man, with a very busy schedule. On more than on occasion his nice old butler will call and extend apologies that Mr. Wayne will not be able to make it this evening. Sometimes it's virtually impossible to get a hold of him over the phone. After a while they stop trying. None of them feel quite surprised by that. In the end, it just doesn't work. Sure, he's a little distant and doesn't make himself emotionally available...but he's not a bad person.
Especially when the so-called "exes" of Bruce Wayne start networking. Gotham isn't a small city, but the social circles Bruce Wayne travels in aren't as big. They don't quite gossip or complain about him. More like...who else would get it?
(I touched his side once and he winced...like he'd been hurt real bad there. He laughed and said it was tackle polo. How does that even-?)
(Somehow, after two dates, he saw right through me and listened while I told him what that casting director tried to do. He nodded, gave me the contact details of a law firm, and said not to worry about the legal fees.)
(I don't know for sure it was him, but it can't be a coincidence that my building got bought out from under my shitty landlord and we were all able to buy our apartments under market value.)
(He got my brother in the best rehab program in the city after his relapse. It probably saved his life. We'd stopped dating months ago, I still don't know how he found out.)
(He gave me a card with a phone number and told me that if I was ever in trouble to call it. Said one of his cars would come to pick me up, any time, any place, no questions asked. The one time I did have to use it after a bad party, it was Alfred.)
I think any tabloid reporter digging around for salacious stories or dirt about Bruce Wayne's love life would be completely and politely stonewalled when they try asking his former Dates. Even when money is offered. Every single one of them.
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ktgoodmorning · 23 days
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Bored
Mapi Leon x reader
Mapi gets bored while you're gone on international duty and finds a new way to keep herself busy.
I kinda love the ending of this one, I really just need me a girl to do this with. If you don’t like the first half, I promise the ending is worth it (imo)
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“But bebita, what am I supposed to do for two whole weeks while you’re gone?” 
“Maybe you could do some more drawing while I’m gone? Draw something for me or for the apartment or something?” 
To say Mapi was not happy about you leaving was an understatement. You were going home for almost two weeks for international break and Mapi was still stuck in the gym doing rehab, not even getting to fully partake in training yet. Many of your friends from the team would be gone as well so she certainly wasn’t looking forward to it. Throughout her injury she had been bored enough; without you to keep her company, she’d be absolutely losing her mind. 
“I’ve literally drawn everything. I have nothing left.” she gave you a pout and shrugged in defiance, automatically turning herself into a toddler. She had flopped across your bed dramatically while you made sure you had everything you needed to go. 
“Mapi, I’m sure you will find something. Maybe there’s another project of some kind that you can get into?” 
“No, there’s none. I’ve done everything. And I will die of boredom. And you don’t even care.” 
You rolled your eyes at how childish your girlfriend was being while you finished zipping your suitcase. “I’m quite sure you won’t die. And I will be sure to give you a call when I get some free time, okay?”
“Well hopefully I’m still alive by then.” 
“You’re ridiculous, María.”
“But you love me!”
“Yes, I do. But I’m also gonna be late if I don’t head out, so please sit up and give me a kiss.” 
“Fine,” she mumbled, but still sat up to comply, not willing to turn down an opportunity to kiss you, especially when it would be her last one for a while. “I love you, please text me when you get there.”
“That I can do. I love you too, I’ll miss you.”
“Apparently not enough to bring me with you, though.” She grumbled once again while she carried your bag to the door for you. 
With one last hug and kiss, you were sent on your way, getting in your Uber and going straight to the airport. Of course Mapi continued texting you the entire way in an attempt to keep herself occupied until you had to board your plane and she was forced to face her boredom. 
Normally you wouldn’t have much reason to worry about your girlfriend when you were gone. Sure, you missed her, but that was about the extent of it. She’d be busy in Barça trainings or sometimes tagging along with Patri and Pina on mini vacations if they had time off during the break, so she was always kept entertained. But Mapi’s injury had taken its toll on her and she was far past the point of being kept busy by a book or sketchpad. She was antsy to get back in the field and it was killing her to still not be in full training with all her friends. Your mind was busy with thoughts of her as you put your phone away and your plane took off.
… 
Hours later when your plane touched down, you took your phone off airplane mode and had a flood of texts streaming in that Mapi had sent throughout your flight. Nothing was wrong or anything like that, just a full stream of consciousness sharing every thought she had with you over the past few hours. Through her messages, you could easily piece together that she was, of course, bored, hated the new book she had started and decided not to finish it, tried to watch a movie but didn’t like it, complained a lot, and then decided on taking a nap. You assumed that she was still asleep as the nap was the last text you received from her, making a mental note to call her once you were on the way to your hotel. As you sat waiting to get off the plane, it hit you that these two weeks might go a lot worse than you thought. 
You realized once you got in the car to your hotel that calling your girlfriend, and therefore waking her from her nap, would be a bad idea, so instead you sent her a text to let her know you made it. In hopes of keeping your girlfriend company, you also texted Patri and Pina to see if they could check in on her and invite her to tag along with them while you were gone. You wouldn’t ever tell Mapi you asked but you knew that it would help her pass the time if she wasn’t moping around, alone the entire time, and Patri and Pina would always be glad to have her join them.
… 
Later that night when you were settled into your hotel room, your girlfriend must have woken up, as you suddenly got a flood of texts from her. 
“Hola, bebita”
“I just woke up”
“I’m glad you made it”
“How was the flight”
“I slept so long”
“Why didn’t you call me on your way to the hotel? You could have woken me up, I wouldn’t have cared” (not true) 
“I love you”
“I miss you”
“Can you come home yet”
That’s about how every text looked- just continuously coming in as she thought of it. Immediately you decided to just Facetime her instead of forcing her to type it all out. 
She didn’t have much to say other than that she was still bored, and that her nap helped pass the time. You took the opportunity to fill her in on all the details from the flight and how your day had gone, knowing that she would appreciate it the longer you talked. The two of you talked and talked until you started drifting off, making hardly any sense as you tried your best to continue the conversation. 
“Baby, you’re falling asleep, I should let you go. You need to rest up for training tomorrow, especially after your flight.” you could see in her eyes that she was disappointed to have to say goodbye.
“It’s alright, you can keep talking. I like listening to you while I fall asleep, just know I’m gonna stop responding soon so don’t say anything important.”
“Are you sure, I-”
“I’m positive, Mapi,” you leaned over to turn off the lights and get comfortable in your hotel bed. “I love you. And I have a hard time sleeping when you’re not here to cuddle with me, so at least your voice is better than nothing.” Your girlfriend’s face broke into a sad smile when she realized that you missed her just as much as she did. 
“I love you too, amor. You get comfy, and I’ll keep going then.” And that was exactly what she did, continuing to go on quietly about whatever random thing she could think of so that her voice could lull you to sleep. You meant what you said when you had a hard time sleeping without her near so her voice was exactly what you needed to help you drift into a gentle sleep. 
The next few days went exactly as the first had. Plenty of complaints and texts from Mapi that you responded to whenever you caught a spare minute. She didn’t necessarily expect a response, she understood you were busy and wasn’t trying to interrupt, it was more of a way for her to stay somewhat occupied. When she wasn’t in the gym, continuing to work on her recovery, she was often napping with Bagheera, or sometimes tagging along with Patri and Pina. 
After about three days in this routine, she decided that third wheeling with the two of them only made her miss you more. She’d see them get all cuddly together and suddenly feel more alone than ever, only wanting you. 
Unbeknownst to you, on your fourth day being gone, Mapi decided to follow your advice of finding some kind of new project to keep her busy. It was becoming more and more clear to her that she couldn’t go on like this for the next two weeks so she was willing to try almost anything. She had suddenly delved into her newfound hobby with such conviction that her texts to you began to lessen. You still had your nightly phone call and she was still just as chatty as usual, but you no longer received her entire stream of consciousness throughout the day. 
On day seven, now three days without her constant texts, you finally decided to ask her about it. You assumed she just got used to you being gone and had found something to do. 
“What have you been up to the past few days? You must have found something to keep you busy, si?” 
“Si, si, si. But I cannot tell you, it’s a surprise.” She was smiling from ear to ear, almost suspiciously excited, given her attitude just a few days prior. 
“Not that I don’t like seeing you happy, Maps, but I feel like you’re far too happy right now.” You giggled at her lightly, glad to see her doing so well, but also knowing it wasn’t unusual for her to get herself into trouble when you were gone. 
Her mouth dropped open, giving you a playful look of shock at what you were implying. “Don’t you trust me, amor?”
“Yeah, but I feel like I shouldn’t…” Her mouth dropped even further as you laughed at her. Your girlfriend just smiled at your laughter, happy to see one of her favorite things after a week apart. 
As your laughter died down, she turned more serious, realizing, once again, how much she missed having you home and hearing your laughter around the house. “Would you please just come back to me, I miss you?” 
“I know, Maps, I miss you too. One week from today, I’ll be back home to you, though.” 
“One week can’t come soon enough. Why don’t you get into bed and I’ll keep talking? You’ve got a game tomorrow and I can’t be the reason you’re up too late.” And that’s exactly what you did. You both shared your final goodnights and I love you's before letting her talk you to sleep, just as you had done every day that week. 
The rest of international break continued with the same routine. You wouldn’t hear much from Mapi during the day but still always ended your nights with a phone call where she talked until you fell asleep. She still refused to tell you how she was filling her time, just telling you that she found a new project, just like you told her to. As you boarded your plane to go home to her, you were itching with excitement, both to see her as well as to see what she had been up to. 
Mapi had been suspiciously quiet that morning, nothing but a “can’t wait to see you” and “I love you” text from her. Based on her odd behavior, you figured she had either destroyed your apartment and didn’t want you to know, or had some kind gift for you and wanted it to remain a surprise. Either way, you knew you were anxious to see what she had up her sleeve. Your contemplation made it hard to focus on your book during the flight, eventually just giving up and letting your mind wander for the hour you had left in the air. 
When your plane landed, your excitement only grew as you made your way through customs, knowing your girlfriend was waiting for you on the other side. You had shared some texts since you landed, her letting you know that she was in the lobby, waiting to greet you the second you emerged. She still was yet to share any details of her last two weeks which was increasingly unusual for her. 
“Bebita!!” You heard the familiar voice calling to you the second you stepped off the escalator into the main lobby. She lightly jogged her way over to greet you with a hug just as she always did, throwing her arms around your neck and going up on her tippy toes to meet you. 
“María, mi amor!” you let your hands go around her waist to squeeze her into you tightly while you mumbled into her hair. “I missed you.”
“At least you were actually doing stuff! I was just stuck at home! All alone, and injured, and bored, and alone.” She was back to her playful teasing, no different than she was before you had left for break, still just as dramatic as always. 
“Well I’m back now! So maybe you should quit grumbling and take me home, yes?”
“Si, yes, I’d love to take you home.” this time she was more serious, mumbling against your lips as she left you a series of soft kisses.
With that, your girlfriend finally separated from you, taking all your bags (even though you insisted you could do it just fine yourself), and leading you to her car with her free hand linked with yours. She refused to let you put your bags in her car yourself, even when you reminded her that she was still technically injured.  
When she sat down in the driver’s seat next to you, she held your hand in yours once again, holding them both in her lap, sometimes placing soft kisses on your knuckles. “María, are you gonna tell me what you’ve been up to for the past two weeks?”
“That’s for me to know and you to find out.” she flashed you a cheeky smile before turning back to face the road. You figured it couldn’t be anything too bad because if she was really trying to hide it and keep herself out of trouble she wouldn’t be all smiley like this. It had to be more of a good surprise than anything else. “Tell me about your day, baby. How was your flight?” You scoffed at her obvious change of subject but still obliged, having nothing better to talk about at the moment as she finished her drive to your shared apartment. 
When she unlocked your front door, you were a little surprised to see nothing out of place. Your apartment appeared to have everything in its place, just as clean as when you left it two weeks ago. You gave Mapi a questioning look, trying to figure out what she had been so secretive about while she just smirked at you. 
“Okay, Maps, give it up. What have you been hiding from me?” 
“Close your eyes, amor.” She could tell you were slightly unsure by the way your eyebrows shot up on your forehead, immediately coming over to reassure you. She took both your hands in hers gently, looking directly in your eyes. “Just trust me. I just have to run in the other room to grab something and I’ll be right back. It’s nothing bad, I promise.” She leaned up to you to punctuate her sentence with a kiss. 
“Fine, but if you’re pranking me, you’re sleeping on the couch tonight. I’m serious!” 
You watched her roll her eyes at you but you both knew the warning was warranted given her past attempts to play jokes on you. When she didn’t react further, you finally gave in and shut your eyes, listening to her footsteps run into your bedroom for a minute before returning. You fought to suppress your smile. Just from the sound of her footsteps you could perfectly picture the way she was running, much like a child, going as fast as she could to excitedly show you what she was hiding. 
Just a few seconds later, you felt her presence in front of you before she spoke up again. “Give me your hand.” You tentatively did as she asked, keeping your eyes closed while carefully holding your hand out to her, allowing her to hold it in her own. Her hand raised yours up to her lips to place a kiss on your palm before she slid something onto your wrist. Your eyes shot open at the feeling, taking a minute to adjust to the light before settling on the mass of bracelets that she had slid onto your arm. 
You felt the tension leave your shoulders as soon as you saw her surprise, relaxed that it was something so small yet so sweet. There were at least five on your wrist already, and a pile more in her hands that she hadn’t given you yet. 
“They’re friendship bracelets!” Your girlfriend was basically bouncing up and down, smiling up at you, completely giddy over her creation. Each one was full of plastic beads along with some white letter beads, all spelling out something different. Some were chunky, childlike, beads in a mix of neon colors while others were small little ones in intricate patterns. Each one clearly had a significant amount of thought put into it. 
“Is this what you’ve been working on all week?” You smiled brightly at her, touched by how excited she was to make you these. 
“Si, si, let me show you all of them.” She still had a hold of your hand as she dragged you over to the couch to tell you her thoughts behind every single bracelet she made you. 
“So this one is for Barcelona, obviously.” The bracelet was full of alternating red and blue beads with a number four in the middle. “I made one with your number and then I thought, ‘would it be too cliche if we matched?’ and I decided no, so then I made one for me with my number. But then I liked yours better so I figured we could trade and just have each other’s number.” You couldn’t stop smiling as you watched her ramble, continuing to talk through all of them, barely keeping up with the speed she was speaking at. 
“So this one is a mix of both of our favorite colors, plus green because I think if Bagheera had a favorite color it would be green, and then it has each of our initials plus BL for-”
“For Bagheera León.” You finished her sentence for her as you both giggled. 
“Si, si, for Bagheera. So we both have that one matching and also I made one for Bagheera but she doesn’t really like it very much but we can make her wear it if you want a picture of us all matching.” 
She pulled at another one. “This one’s your national team colors and number but I also made one that’s those colors mixed with Barça colors cause that seemed like something you would like cause that’s all of the colors then. I figure maybe when you play I’ll wear that one for good luck. As long as you let me borrow it of course. This one says ‘I heart Mapi’ because we can’t have you forgetting that. But this one says ‘I heart you’ cause I do, and I don’t want you forgetting that either.”
“I love you so much, María.” She looked up for the first time since she started her rambling, needing to catch her breath all of the sudden, as you left a kiss on her nose. “Thank you. For all of these. They are really sweet, I love them.”
“Well I was bored and you told me to find a project, so I did. And it was fun! It kept me busy. And I like making things for you.”
“Well they’re perfect. Maybe I need to leave more often so I keep coming home to things like this.” You gave her a smirk, knowing exactly the reaction you’d get as you watched her jaw drop, ready to start complaining about her potential boredom once again. 
“You better be joking cause that was too long for me. Next time if I still can’t play, you’re bringing me with you.” She pulled you in for a long, hard, kiss, much deeper than the ones she’d left you so far. 
“Deal,” you mumbled into her lips, before she pulled you impossibly closer, knowing you were both in for a fun night.
Would love some requests to get the inspo flowing :)
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hairmetal666 · 9 months
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Eddie Munson gets famous at fifteen, after a YouTube video goes viral.
He's the kind of famous where he can't leave his house without being mobbed; where his name is plastered across grocery store tabloids and every fifth Pop Crave post; who has to make special arrangements with stores, whose body guards have body guards, who's forgotten what it's like to be normal. He's the kind of famous with well-chronicled stints in and out of rehab
And he thinks, at thirty, why not do a reality show? Why not let everyone in the world into his life because they're there anyway?
There's this guy on the crew, beautiful as a fucking sunrise. He's all golden-tanned and chestnut-haired, with these big hazel eyes that makes Eddie stomach swoop deliciously whenever they happen to meet his.
His name is Steve.
And Eddie, well. He's learned his lesson about jumping into relationships. So, Steve is nice to look at, and that's all there is to it.
---
They're at the studio, and Eddie, he only smokes when he's recording but he's "not allowed" to do that inside. So, he steps out into the alley behind the building, eyes falling shut as he hands search his pockets for his pack of Camels and his Zippo.
"I didn't realize you smoked," a deep voice says from the darkness.
Eddie startles, eyes flying open. Steve is leaning against the brick of the building, cigarette perched between his pursed lips.
"Sorry, didn't mean to scare you. I'm Steve. With the crew."
"Eddie," he answers by instinct.
"I know," Steve chuckles. His hazel eyes are golden in the yellow streetlight.
"Oh, right." He lights his cigarette and inhales deep.
"I really like what you're doing in there." Steve nods his head towards the studio.
"You a fan?"
"Never listened to you much before. Not really a metal kinda guy, but I like it."
People aren't usually honest with Eddie. It's refreshing.
"Glad you're getting into it! How's your--uh, job going?"
Steve laughs. "First assistant camera, that's my job." Eddie's expression must read a total blank, but Steve only smiles. "I make sure everything's in focus while we film"
"Is that--hard?"
"Sometimes," Steve agrees. "How do you like being the star of a reality show?"
Eddie huffs out a breath. "It's more fun than I expected. Like, sure it's weird to have you guys follow me around, but at least I invited you, you know?"
Steve's dark eyes are fathomless in his perfect face. "You'll let me know? If anything happens that you don't like?"
Eddie nods, taken aback by the serious line of Steve's pretty mouth. Before he can respond more, the back door creaks open, Gareth's backlit shape leaning into the alley. "Eddie? They're ready for you."
"Duty calls." He smiles at Steve as he stomps out his cigarette. "See you around."
---
Eddie goes to a house party in the hills. It's just a handful of people, all of them he's known for years, no cameras in sight.
Someone asks how things are going with the band. Eddie doesn't think anything of it. Why should he, among friends? Why should he when they already know the resentment that Gareth, Jeff, and Freak have for him? Eddie got signed and not his band. The guys--they never really forgave him, think he could have tried harder.
So, he says--he says--"I wish they didn't resent me so goddamn much still. To this day! They're millionaires and they're pissed at me? Fuck that. I got them here. I got us all here."
They're filming the next day at Eddie's house. He's working on a new song, engrossed in his acoustic and his notebook.
He's so in the zone, it takes him a second to register when Gareth bursts into the house.
"Fuck you, Munson," Gareth screams. "What the fuck is this shit?" Eddie's own voice pours from Gareth's phone, and Eddie's stunned speechless for dozens of seconds as he tries to comprehend what's happening.
"I didn't--" he tires. He raises his hands placatingly, but his minds a whirlwind, thoughts a tangle, heart a mess of betrayal and hurt and fear.
"We should be fucking grateful?" Gareth yells. "You spoiled piece of shit, fuck you!" He lunges towards Eddie, but Steve darts from behind the camera, moving to block Gareth's path.
"Stop filming," Eddie shouts. He lifts his arms to block the shit. "Get out," he snaps at the crew. " Now!"
He and Gareth scuffle towards a set of double-doors, heated words low and unintelligible.
"Don't come in." He tells the crew. "Steve, I mean it. Tell them to stop."
Eddie shoves Gareth into the other room, slamming the door behind him. Still, the mics pick up the screaming fight between the two men.
Hours later, Eddie finally makes his way back to the main part of the house, finds Steve standing at the kitchen island.
"Why are you still here?" He's too exhausted from the fight to put any inflection into it.
"I was wo--I wanted to make sure everything was okay," Steve says. He relaxes against the island. "Are yo--is everything okay?"
Eddie's laugh is humorless. "Something like that."
"Do you want to talk about it?"
The tears he kept at bay with Gareth prick at his eyelids until they burn. "Not really, no."
Steve nods. "We could--you wanna watch a movie?"
This startles a laugh out of Eddie, one that has tears flooding his eyes and he has to blink fast, look down, anything so Steve doesn't notice.
"You know what I want?" he says. It's soft enough that maybe Steve, across the kitchen, wouldn't hear.
"What?"
"To have friends who won't sell me out for a couple thousand bucks." The tears start falling, his throat choked with emotion.
He wants to stop, embarrassed to be crying in front of Steve, but now that he's started, sobs shake his shoulders and he can't keep quiet.
Steve reaches for him. "Is this okay?" he whispers, hands rubbing circles against his back.
Eddie nods, cries for a while as Steve makes soothing motions against his back.
"I just wish I was normal," he mumbles when he has words again.
Steve's hold on him tightens. "I'm sorry, Eddie."
Shame hits him then, too hard to ignore, and he steps away. "I'm gonna--I'm gonna go. I--Thanks again."
He ignores the sound of Steve calling him back.
---
Eddie's playing a show. He's playing a show in a small club, something he hasn't been able to do for years, but he's doing it right now. It's electric, vibrating through his body, the crowd screaming along with every word.
So much of this is because of Steve, and Eddie can't think about it, because men like Steve aren't for guys like Eddie.
As he plays, his eyes scan the small crowd, find Steve easily. He's gazing at Eddie, lips slicked pink and parted, eyes shining. Eddie knows this look; the naked desire obvious. A heat he never lets himself feel for Steve blooms low in his abdomen, but--
He wails into his mic, forcing his thoughts away from that path. He has a show to play, one that's pumping his veins full of satisfied adrenaline. Nothing can ruin it.
When the show ends, Eddie is high, endorphins and adrenaline pounding through his bloodstream.
Eddie, the band, and the film crew make their way out the club's backdoor. There's a car idling close by, but they only get a few steps in before there's shouting; the ear-shattering click of dozens of camera shutters; overwhelming burst of flashes.
Eddie is disoriented, dizzy; the rapid shift from the best night he's had in years, to this, mobbed by paparazzi, people screaming his name, crowding their small group. He stumbles, black spots still obstructing his vision.
Arms catch around him, holding him steady. "You okay?" Steve asks.
Before he can answer, one of the paps yells, "Munson's wasted! Can't even walk!"
"C'mon, Ed, I've got you," Steve says.
"Just get into the booze, Munson, or someone had Molly too? Maybe a little coke? That used to be your thing, right? Snort a little blow and do a show?"
Eddie tenses, almost stops, but Steve keeps him going.
The crowd surges around them, more voices yelling, more flashbulbs popping, the guy saying, "He can't even stand without help! You got a real problem you know?"and he just--can't anymore. He whirls out of Steve's grasp, lunges for the guy.
"What's your fucking problem, man?" Eddie hisses. "What did I do to you, huh?"
"Real tough, Munson, huh?" The man sneers. He shoves Eddie hard, knocking him back a few steps.
Eddie's vision fuzzes out, brain buzzing. He snarls, knows he does, knows he's losing it, can't make it stop.
Strong arms wrap around his waist, pull him off his feet. He fights it until he's pressed into a wall, until cold hands cup his face.
"Baby, baby, you have to calm down," Steve murmurs. "You have to breathe, can you do that for me?"
"I want--he can't--I--"
Steve presses harder against him, bodies joined. "You're having a panic attack, yeah? Can you breathe with me, baby? Match me?"
Eddie nods, tries, wants to be good for Steve.
He calms, as much from the breathing exercise as being held by the most beautiful man he's ever seen. Pressing his face against Steve's neck he says, "why are you always around for my worst moments? I'm such a fucking mess."
"I don't think you're a mess," he says. "I think you've gotten hurt, you've gotten cornered. And your reactions are normal."
"Why do you even care?" Eddie asks.
Steve doesn't even pause. "Cause I like you, Eddie." His hold tightens for a second. "I like you a lot."
Eddie scoffs. "Yeah, you like Eddie Munson, the hot rockstar. Not the loser who cries in your arms"
Cold air hits Eddie as Steve steps away to meet Eddie's eyes. You want to know something? I didn't expect to like you at all. I admit, I bought into all the stories on the internet. But you were never anything like that, Ed. Not even once."
Steve takes a deep breath, turning away as his cheeks grow pink. "And you--you're always going out of your way for people. The day I knew I was gone for you? Three weeks into filming. There was this kid interning. You didn't know a thing about him, just some twenty-year-old, and you sat down and talked to him. Were genuinely interested in everything he said."
"Steve," Eddie's voice breaks. He has to cover his mouth, lips a wobbling mess.
"I want to give you normal, Eddie, as much as I can. If you'll let me."
The moisture tumbles free from his eyes, streaking down his cheeks. Eddie laughs. "God, Steve, you're--I like you, too."
Steve brushes the tears away. "So, you'd go on a date with me?"
"I think I would really like to go on a date with you, yeah."
Steve leans in, slow and gentle, placing a soft kiss at the corner of Eddie's mouth. It lights him up like a fresh struck match, nerve endings on fire. He thinks it's so much more than like already.
"Take me home, sweetheart," he says.
"Getting fresh with me, Munson," Steve smirks. "I won't have you using your rockstar wiles to seduce me."
Eddie's laugh echoes off the brick of the surrounding buildings. "Oh, sweetheart, my rockstar ways will destroy you."
"That a promise?"
---
Six months later, the first and only season of Welcome to Hell premieres. Instead, of chronicling a rockstar's debauched and wild lifestyle, it's a soft and charming love story. It shows Steve and Eddie growing closer, Steve working late into the night, to give Eddie the hint of normalcy he's so desperate for, to make him happy. It shows Eddie's eyes track Steve across a room, something like sadness crossing his face. It shows a concert that Steve arranged, the fight with the pap outside the venue, brief glimpses of Steve and Eddie in the aftermath, the gentle kiss.
In the last interview of the season, the producer asks Eddie if there will be a season two of Welcome to Hell.
Eddie smiles, glances off camera, which pans to find Steve in worn jeans and a Metallica hoodie, hair messy and wearing glasses. He gazes at Eddie, smiles this soft, aching thing.
"Nah, I don't think I need it anymore," Eddie answers. Throwing the camera a smile that matches Steve's.
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woso-dreamzzz · 5 months
Text
Video II
Meadema x Baby!Reader
Summary: Munchkin vs ACLs
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The first week with you is perfect.
You're a fairly well-behaved baby. You're smiley and happy and you sleep through most nights. Viv's on overnight duty though, your first week with them, because she's the only one out of the two of them with working knees.
It's absolutely perfect. You settle in well and you fit so well in Viv's arms that it must be fate.
Then...She tears her ACL.
It's like you know something's wrong because you scream and cry for days on end and Beth and Viv barely have the strength to get up to attend to your needs.
Between the two of them, they manage to pull your crib into their room, leaving it at the foot of the bed for easy access. You get less time on the floor on your sensory mat because they can't bend down properly to grab you anymore.
It's like their own personal hell.
You won't settle unless one of them is holding you. You won't settle unless one of them is moving you about.
Beth cries multiple times as she tries to soothe you as you sob until you're red in the face. Viv cries too but when she's in bed and you've just fallen asleep. She sobs into Beth's chest for hours.
It's a struggle but neither she nor Beth can imagine their lives without you in it.
They keep you to themselves for the first few weeks they have you but end up bringing you with them to rehab when they start.
"Oh, look at this cutie," Vic coos as they both hobble in," Look! Look! She's smiling at me!"
"It's gas," Beth laughs.
You're completely passed out in your pram and you smack your lips together a few times in your sleep.
"I'll take her," Lia offers," If you two want to go to the physios."
"We can keep her," Beth insists," It's fine."
"You two can barely walk," Lia reminds them," Let alone push her all the way down to the physios. Let me take her."
Beth is loath to leave you. Viv doesn't want to leave either but she knows that Lia's right.
"You'll bring her back?" Beth asks and Lia shrugs.
"I don't know. This little cutie might end up coming home with me."
"Alright," Beth laughs," That's it. I don't think we're going to let you have her."
"Go!" Lia says," You'll get her back."
Beth is a little guilty as she tries to rush through the first part of the rehab session, desperately trying to hurry everyone along so she can escape to the gym where she knows you and Lia are.
Viv's not ready for the gym just yet so she's stuck in the physios for most of the day.
Beth hobbles her way to the gym as fast as she can go. The scene that greets her is one that she suspected.
Your pram is parked right by the door, completely empty save for the changing bag hanging off a handle. You're nowhere near it, held nice and snug in Lia's arms at the very centre of the group of fawning teammates.
You make happy little snuffling noises as the team coo over you.
"I hope you washed your hands," Beth says in greeting as she heads over.
"Of course!" Katie says with a grin as she tips her pretend hat," Only the best for Viv's baby."
Beth rolls her eyes. "I get that you're the president of Viv's fan club but she's my baby too."
Katie waves a dismissive hand. "Same thing."
"Well, do I get my baby back or not?"
Leah, who has somehow taken custody of you, shakes her head. "Haven't you got stretches to be doing?"
"Haven't you?"
"I'm holding this little munchkin. She's like a little angel, mate. I'm not putting her down."
"You've only got five minutes," Steph complains," Then it's my turn."
"Don't take turns on my baby!"
Leah rolls her eyes. "This is the Arsenal baby. She's all of our baby."
"I don't see you getting up in the middle of the night for a feed."
Leah ignores her, soaking up all her time with you before begrudgingly handing you over to Steph, who takes her turn happily before moving you along the line.
Beth doesn't get you back unless it's for feedings or to change you but even those two things are done with an audience of your aunties cooing over you.
"We need to keep her away from them," Beth says softly that night as she sits in bed with Viv, you tucked up on Viv's chest taking a bottle," We'll never get her back again."
Viv laughs as she mops up some of the milk that's spilt down your chin. "I don't think it's that easy."
It's not because a few weeks later Laura moves in.
She's done her ACL too and it's like pass the baby to the most depressed person in the room. With three working knees between them, it's like playing hot potato with the you and you're very rarely out of somebody's arms.
To be honest, you seem to enjoy this greatly and, when Viv finally puts her metaphorical foot down and sets you up for tummy time, you whine and cry the entire time.
"Don't, Laura," Viv says softly when Laura moves to pick you up again," Not with your knee."
Beth's the one that's been put in charge of you, sitting next to you on your mat with her leg stretched out.
You keep whining and crying and Beth has to turn a blind eye because she knows that you're meant to be having more tummy time than you're actually getting.
It's just easier if someone's holding you now that you currently have more working knees than anyone else in the house. Usually, it's Laura who ends up holding you (not that she complains) but Viv's insisted on tummy time.
You whine a bit pitifully before it peters off when you notice that no one's coming to your rescue.
"It's alright, munchkin," Beth says softly," Just a little bit longer and then you get to nap."
You end up doing that in her arms. It's easier than hobbling through the house to place you back down in your crib. You yawn softly, your mouth making the perfect 'o' as you move around a little bit.
Your eyes flutter shut and you go completely limp and relaxed in her arms.
"The bottles are done," Viv says as she limps over," Ready to be heated up when we need them."
Beth smiles. "Munchkin's asleep too."
"So is Laura."
Beth hadn't even noticed Laura asleep too, curled up on the sofa with an arm grazing the floor.
"We're so good at this. Two knees between us and we've got everything done."
Viv rolls her eyes. "I saw you finish her tummy time early, you know. She needs to do it properly later."
"Oh, come on, Viv! She was crying!"
"You're such a pushover."
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devildom-moss · 3 months
Text
Signs of Affection (kiss)
Part 2 of this request (Lucifer, Leviathan, Diavolo, Barbatos, and Simeon)
(Mammon x gn!MC) (Satan x gn!MC) (Asmodeus x gn!MC) (Belphegor x gn!MC) (Solomon x gn!MC)
(Suggestive)
Word Count: +4,100 (we aren't going to talk about the size difference between these shorts okay?)
Mammon
“Geez, that sucked. Two hours of silent studyin’ for an F? I got a different F for that guy: a big ‘fuck you,’” Mammon grumbled to himself with his hands folded behind his head as he walked out of his mandatory extra lessons – or rather, they could have been classified as lessons if he had actually learned anything. Instead, Mammon spent the first 5 minutes trying to read one paragraph four times and the next 3 minutes trying to read the following paragraph before he became acutely aware that the supervising professor for today was watching him. He was clearly disappointed and judgmental of Mammon’s ongoing failure to turn the page. For the rest of his lesson, Mammon alternated between daydreaming about you – twisting your image in his head into a variety of different scenarios from innocent dates to the most depraved acts – and counting how many times he could spot the first letter of your name on the page. At least with the latter, it looked like he was reading.
“Mammon! How was delinquent rehab?” you teased him from your spot on the bench outside of the class.
Mammon shrieked and jumped. “W-what the fuck are ya doin’ here?!”
“MAMMON!” The supervisor poked his head out of the door. “Stop yelling in the hall and go home before I decide to keep you for another hour.”
“Sorry, that was my fault, Professor Amy. I startled him.” You stood up and bowed slightly, hoping the astronomy – and somehow, simultaneously, art – professor would go easy on Mammon if you took the heat.
“Oh, it’s you.” You were right to hope; Amy’s tone instantly softened. “If you’re on your way home, please take this loudmouth with you.”
“Who ya callin’ a loudmouth, man?” Mammon growled. You cupped your hand over his mouth; better late than never.
“Yes, I’ll be on my way now. I was just waiting for Mammon to finish his lessons.”
“Does being an idiot pay off after all?” Amy mused aloud – mostly to annoy the muzzled Mammon. “Very well. Be safe on your way home.”
“Alright, thank you, sir.” You smiled at him and began to drag Mammon down the hall. You only uncovered his mouth once the professor had gone back inside, and you were safely out of earshot.
“’Thank you, sir,’” Mammon mocked you. “Fuck was all that? You ain’t fuckin’ that teacher now are ya?”
“No, you pervert. It’s called being polite. You’d probably get in less trouble if you tried it with a few of your professors.”
“What’cha doin’ bein’ all polite to him for, anyway? Guy’s not even a good teacher, and he clearly has a human kink. Just stay away from him.”
“I almost never talk to him outside of our classes.” You rolled your eyes at Mammon. His jealousy had been excessive recently. As a slight punishment, you decided to tease him. “And why do you know so much about human kinks that you can recognize it in someone else?”
“Shuddup. It ain’t like that!”
“Like what?”
“I don’t have a human kink or nothing,” Mammon yelled. His cheeks burned, and he blurted out, “it’s only you.”
“Sorry, what was that?” you teased, biting back your smile.
“I didn’t say shit. Forget it.” Mammon crossed his arms as he picked up his speed just enough to walk ahead of you, hoping to avoid showing you the blush that stained his face.
“Okay, Mammon.” You dropped it, allowing him a bit of his dignity.
You both walked in silence for a minute until, finally, Mammon slowed down and started to walk beside you again. His blush had calmed. He glanced to the side briefly, trying not to draw your attention, but you noticed and smiled at him. Why do ya always look so cute ‘n happy when you’re walkin’ home with me, huh? What gives? Mammon wondered. If something as simple as walking home could make you smile like that, you were going to start charming demons left and right, and Mammon had no intention of sharing any more of you than he had to. That’s why he was so annoyed by you being nice to that professor. Just thinking about the way that demon’s face softened around you was pissing him off.
Suddenly, Mammon remembered what you had said, and his cheeks reignited in a faint blush. Nervous and masking his shyness with aggression, Mammon asked, “Hey, were ya serious about that back there – about just waitin’ for me to get out?”
“Yeah, of course I was.”
“For real? Ya waited two whole hours?”
“For my favorite hole? Yeah.” You smirked.
“Shuddup!” Mammon’s face burned. “Now who’s bein’ a perv?!”
“At least we’re even.” You smiled sweetly, as if you hadn’t just said something so vulgar – on a public street, no less.
Mammon stopped in his tracks, confidence surging in him. You stopped and looked back, confused. He grinned. “Ya must really love the Great Mammon, huh?”
“Sure do,” you readily agreed.
“I knew it!” Mammon pronounced – as if the occasional doubt had never wandered into his head. While he still had the courage to act, Mammon grabbed the sides of your face and quickly placed a kiss on your cheek. He whispered in your ear, “Thanks for bein’ so sweet to me, MC.”
Before you could register what had just happened, Mammon took off running towards the House of Lamentation. He pulled out his phone, skillfully dodging random obstacles and other demons as he appeared to start typing something. Seconds later, your D.D.D. buzzed.
Mammon: First one home gets a real kiss from the loser. Deal?
You laughed and stared down the street, watching as Mammon increased the distance between you. There was no way you were going to catch up to him.
MC: Deal. 💛
Satan
Satan was utterly thrilled when he found out the library had finally received the book that he requested two months ago. He insisted upon checking it out immediately after class, and since you had studying to do anyway, you went along with him.
With his new book acquired, Satan joined you at the small table you had settled into and began to read. However, his attention’s lifespan was uncharacteristically short despite his initial excitement. Satan’s eyes wandered away from the page, drifting up to you. Each time he tried to refocus on the book, his gaze punished him for a failure to indulge himself by lingering on you.
Few things enticed Satan more than you – especially when you got that serious look on your face. He had tried to keep reading too many times to keep track of, and now he couldn’t bear to tear his eyes away from you again. So, he just sat there, watching you read over your notes, recopying the most relevant points on a fresh sheet of paper. You were being so diligent.
One of the awful things about demons is that the alarm bells that go off in your head when you think someone is watching you are stronger and scarier when that someone is a powerful demon – and the fear your innate human senses created under the predatory gaze of a demon like Satan, whose sin was a destructive and devastating wrath, was intense. It sent a shiver up your spine, and when you looked up to find Satan’s eyes locked on your face, you jumped in your seat slightly. He didn’t need to look so hungry.
“Please stop staring, Satan.” You looked away, trying to turn your attention back to your studies.
“You don't want me to stare at you?” Satan got out of his seat across the table and took the spot right next to you. He propped his chin up in his hand and stared at you up close, eyeing you up and down with a smug grin on his face. “I want to. What's the problem?"
“It’s a bit distracting to have your eyes on me.” That was at least mostly true. There was no need to mention he was also turning you on in public. “I’d rather you not just stare at me.”
“Is that all?” Satan laughed. “You don’t want me to just stare? Very well.”
Satan leaned in, slowly shutting his eyes, and kissed your cheek. His warm lips lingered on your skin and his hot breath tickled. You could feel another chill run up your spine when his eyes fluttered back open. Even when he pulled back, his mouth hovered just over your cheek.
Another set of eyes landed on you. From a few aisles away, another library regular was stunned in their spot, mortified to have witnessed the Avatar of Wrath kissing a human in the library – not that they hadn’t seen worse. They gave you an awkward wave before turning and walking in the opposite direction, abandoning the book they had been searching for.
“Satan,” you chided him.
“What?” Satan hummed, inching closer to your ear, and whispered, “Do you still want more?”
“Someone saw.” You felt a bit guilty about it, too. Their embarrassment matched yours; in fact, it may have been even worse. “Why did you kiss me?”
“I wanted to. And who cares if someone saw? What are they going to do about a kiss on the cheek? It’s fine.” Satan placed another kiss on your cheek before returning to whisper seductively in your ear, “Besides, we’ve done worse. Don’t act so shy and innocent now. Do you need a reminder of all the things we’ve done – or perhaps you’d prefer a physical demonstration?”
What did you do to deserve this? You were just trying to study.
Asmodeus
“You weren’t waiting too long for moi, were you?” Asmo rushed to the table that you had grabbed when you arrived. He had a grin on his lips, but that charming smile was a cover for the guilt and anxiety he felt about being fifteen minutes late for your date. He couldn’t figure out which pair of socks to wear to complement his boots and skirt – and in the end, he just ended up pulling on a pair of lace stockings. Usually, Asmo didn’t care if he was a little late, but the idea of leaving you all alone in a demon-infested night café didn’t sit well with him.
“I would have happily waited much longer – especially when you show up, looking this cute.” You smiled at him sweetly, and every inch of Asmo’s body burned.
“Ooh, you little charmer.” Asmo giggled. “Did you order yet?”
“Of course not; I wanted to wait for you.”
“Such an obedient human,” Asmo teased, leaning over the table and resting his chin on his hand. He stared at you affectionately.
“I’ve never been called that in my life.” You laughed, and that only made Asmo happier to have said it.
“Want me to go up and order? Just tell me what you want – other than me, of course.” Asmo got to his feet and waited patiently for you to relay your order. With a smile and a wink, Asmo booped your nose. “Excellent. Now make sure to enjoy the view.”
Before you could question him, Asmo spun around and walked toward the register. Each step was a deliberate effort to draw your attention to his legs and ass. Oh. That view. Asmo was a hopeless flirt, but he was awfully sweet, too. Besides, you couldn’t deny that it was a good view.
Unfortunately, as Asmo returned from placing the order, he was faced with the irritating realization that he was not the only view in the café. He caught a handful of demons leering at you – and one of them appeared to be approaching. Not on Asmo’s expensive, crystal watch. He hurried back to the table just in time to cut off the tall demon, placing his delicate hand over your shoulder possessively. With a haunting smile, Asmo stared them down. He announced – more to the other demon than to you, “I’m back, hun. Did you miss me?”
A shiver ran up the demon’s spine, and their eyes went wide. They weren’t about to square up with Asmodeus over a human – not after all the rumors they had heard about bloodlust being stronger in lust demons than those ruled by wrath. The demon awkwardly tried to escape by blurting out, “enjoy your date.”
The demon scurried away quickly, and you looked up at Asmo just in time for his menacing aura to dissipate. “That was weird, right?”
“Some people just can’t act right around cuties.” Asmo dismissed your worry with a lighthearted laugh.
“So, you get that a lot?”
“Sometimes, but I don’t mean me.” Asmo leaned down to whisper in your ear, “You’re so cute it’s drawing attention.”
“I’m not as cute as you, though.” You smiled. “Now, sit down with me.”
“Actually, I was hoping we could snap a few pictures first. Do you mind?”
“Sure, I guess.” You shrugged and started to stand, but Asmo used his hand that was still resting on your shoulder to push you back down into your seat.
“No need to get up,” Asmo cooed. He took a step back and leaned over your chair so he could get right next to your face and drape his arms over you. “This position is perfect.”
Asmo snapped a few pictures. With each one, he seemed to get closer until his cheek was pressed to yours affectionately. He asked you to make a half heart with your hand and completed it with his own. Then, catching you off guard, Asmo kissed your cheek tenderly, waiting a few seconds before finally snapping a picture. He immediately pulled his phone back and stood up to discreetly examine the photo. The shit-eating grin on his face spoke for itself. He was all too pleased with it.
“What was that?” You scoffed. You probably should have anticipated that level of physical affection from Asmo, but sometimes, he still surprised you.
“Hmm? Isn’t it obvious?” Asmo looked down at you, innocently tilting his head. “I had to mark my territory.”
“What?” Your eyes widened. Sure, Asmo was always teasing you and flirting, but you hadn’t quite expected that answer. Asmo giggled and bent over, getting indecently close to your neck.
“I had to mark you,” he repeated in a low, seductive tone. “Would you rather I leave a hickey on your neck right now instead? I’d be happy to.”
“Just be a good boy and sit down.” You sighed. It wasn’t that embarrassing, but all you could do was imagine Lucifer’s voice scolding you for indulging Asmo too much in public.
“Ooh, I do want to be your good boy. Okay.” Asmo grinned, biting back the urge to call you one of a myriad of unacceptable titles, and returned to his seat across from you. He pulled his phone out and started messing with it. “See, I’m behaving.”
You laughed. Something told you that he was not, in fact, behaving. It only took a few minutes of mindless chatting while he continued tapping away at his phone – a habit you were so accustomed to that it usually didn’t strike you as rude – for your suspicion to be confirmed.
Your D.D.D. buzzed with an alert from Asmo’s Devilgram. He posted the picture of him kissing your cheek with a pink heart emoji covering your face – for the sake of your privacy. That was decent of him. You smiled softly, certain that Asmo was watching you. It already had over 6k likes by the time you scrolled down to read the caption: Ugh. My date is so cute that they’re attracting all sorts of attention. No one else deserves to see that cute face tonight but moi~ What do you think, everyone, should I mark them for myself?  
Asmo was spared a playful lecture when his name was called at the counter. You got up to help him carry the drinks and food back to your table. The barista seemed to be staring at you, but when Asmo put his finger up to his lips, they got flustered and looked away, returning to their work. Covering your face in the picture served another purpose: Asmo was hiding the gloss mark he left on your cheek. You didn’t need to know about it yet.
Belphegor
Belphie was lucky that you had chosen to sit in the back of the lecture hall where he could comfortably lean up against your shoulder and fall asleep without immediate repercussions. At least he was polite enough to nap on the shoulder for your non-dominant hand so you could continue to take notes as you listened to the lecture. Occasionally, you glanced down at his sleeping face; he looked so sweet, peaceful, and adorable.
The clock ticked down the few remaining minutes of the lecture, which was your cue to begin the wake-up process. Although Belphegor seldom cared what his brothers or the professor thought about him using you as a pillow during class, you found that it was easier to just wake him up before the complaints came rolling in. You set your pen down, pet Belphie gently, and whispered his name so that only he would hear you. A soft moan left him, and he nuzzled into your arm before leisurely opening his eyes with a content smile.
“Good morning, MC.” Belphie whispered into your ear.
Reluctantly, Belphegor forced himself upright and away from the warmth of your body just in time for the lecture to be dismissed. The professor and other students gathered their things and collectively made their way towards the doors. You, however, waited on Belphegor to shake off his nap and get to his feet.
“C’mon, MC. Catch up,” Mammon shouted from the front of the class.
“Give us a second,” you replied at a lower volume.
“Man, you two are so slow. I ain’t waitin’ around forever.” Mammon groaned and made his way slowly towards the door.
“He would know slow,” Belphie muttered just loud enough for you to hear as he stood up.
“Belphie,” you chided him, but your tone went ignored.
“Hey, can I borrow your notes later? Maybe we could review together.” There was a soft, sweet neediness in Belphie’s voice.
“Didn’t you catch the lecture in your sleep like you usually do?” Sometimes Belphie’s ability to remember things that happened around him while he was asleep creeped you out. He was like an unassuming monitoring device if he wanted to be.
“Indulge me.” Belphie knocked his shoulder against yours playfully.
“I always do, don’t I?” You sighed. That was the unfortunate effect he had on you: you always found yourself spoiling him, even when he didn’t deserve it – or rather, especially when he didn’t.
You were just about to walk into the hall when Belphie grabbed your hand and pulled you back into the classroom before the others spotted you. He played with your hand, caressing you with his thumbs. His cheeks were stained light pink as his eyes flitted from your hand to your face.
“What’s the matter, Bel?”
Belphie closed the distance between you, springing forward to kiss your cheek. The sudden movement surprised you, but it wasn’t especially shocking; Belphegor had always been physically affectionate. He inched closer, causing his hot breath to ghost over your skin. His lips curved into a precious grin as he whispered in your ear: “Thank you for always spoiling me.”
The honey-sweet tone of Belphie’s voice was undercut by a sharp yell from the corner of the room. “I saw that.”
It was Solomon. He stopped shoving his books into his bag to glare at the back of Belphegor’s head. Unfortunately for Solomon, Belphie wasn’t bothered; he simply rolled his eyes and shrugged.
“Cool shit, bro.” Belphie replied in a condescending tone and lifted his arm up in the air to flip Solomon off. You watched Solomon’s jaw drop slightly as he physically recoiled. Sometimes Solomon forgot how rude Belphegor could be. It was hard not to laugh, but you really shouldn’t encourage his bad behavior by laughing. “Come on, MC. Let’s go.”
Belphie grabbed your arm and dragged you into the hall. He was attached, and he had no intention of letting you go anytime soon. In fact, he planned to stay glued to your side until his desire for your attention was fully satisfied.
Solomon
The warmth of Solomon’s hands as he caressed your cheek was nothing compared to the warmth of his praise and your own pride swelling in your chest. Solomon hummed, “You did such a good job.”
You had successfully used a heating spell on the first try, evidenced by the warmth in Solomon’s previously cold hands. It had been a while since you got a spell that Solomon taught you perfect right away – let alone one that required you to manipulate another person’s body (and you could worry about the ethical dilemma involved with that later). Neither of you had expected you to raise his body temperature at such an ideal rate and stop at the perfect temperature. Of course, Solomon trusted you not to hurt him, but he was impressed by your control. He wanted to test you further.
“Excellent. Let’s try something similar.” Solomon began to search his shelves for the right ingredients. He continued to talk as he scanned, “I want to see if you can cool down an external object with the same level of control. If you can do it, I’ll reward you.”
“Bring it on,” you accepted. Solomon offered you plenty of praise when you did well, but he so rarely gave you an actual reward for your work. It was exciting to imagine what you could earn. Maybe he would teach you a cool, secret spell or give you a magical item. But more motivating than a reward was the idea of making Solomon proud.
“That’s my apprentice – so eager,” he mused, grabbing a bottle of glowing red liquid.
“Oh, but no home cooking as a reward,” you added, sparing your future self from potential suffering.
Solomon whipped his head around with a pout before returning to his search. He found a beaker and brought everything to his desk. By then, the pout had reshaped itself into a smirk. “I didn’t have cooking in mind when I offered you a reward, so it looks like we have a deal.”
Solomon poured plain water and the glowing red liquid into the beaker. They failed to mix. You asked, “What do I have to do?”
It was simple – or at least that was what Solomon said. All you had to do was cool the contents of the container between 32 to 36 degrees below the freezing point of water. If the red substance dipped under 36 degrees below the freezing point of water, it would become unstable. If you failed, the ice and glass would break open. Solomon didn’t tell you anything about the red substance or what “unstable” meant for it. All you knew was that you had a four-degree margin of error.
“And you’re sure it’s safe?”
“I wouldn’t put my favorite apprentice in danger for a game, would I?”
With that reassurance, you focused your magic into the beaker. As the water slowly solidified, the red liquid became concentrated at the center until it was encased in ice. You just had to keep lowering it until something felt right. You stopped and nodded. Solomon inspected the beaker.
“A beautiful job,” Solomon praised you.
“Really? What did I do though?”
“I’ll tell you once the ice melts,” Solomon waved off your curiosity. “For now, it’s time for your reward. Close your eyes.”
You did as he instructed and listened to him moving about the room. His presence got closer until you could feel his warmth. He placed a soft kiss on your cheek, causing your eyes to shoot open and your face to burn. Solomon chuckled at your response.
“I could feel your cheeks getting warm. Did I embarrass you?”
“No. I was just surprised.”
“Really?” Solomon leaned in and kissed your cheek again. “I don’t know. Your face burns under my lips.”
“You’re a terrible teacher,” you retorted. That wasn’t what you were expecting, of course he flustered you.
“Oh? That can’t possibly be true. My adorable apprentice seems to be doing quite well,” Solomon laughed, all too pleased with his successful attempt to tease you. “You learn so quickly. Should we try something even harder? Think you can handle it?”
There was a seductive tint to his words, and you narrowed your eyes at Solomon. “Same shady reward system? Pass.”
“Nope,” Solomon leaned close, trying to entice you. How were you just now noticing how sweet he smelled? Was he wearing perfume or cologne today? You didn’t have time to linger on the thought. Solomon dropped his voice, and through a wicked smirk, he added, “even shadier. If you succeed, I’ll do whatever you ask for a full day.”
“And if I fail?” you asked cautiously.
“I get to punish you.”
(gift version - Beelzebub, Thirteen, Raphael, Mephistopheles)
A/N: These ones got really flirty. . . oh well. Uhm, leave me nice comments or something. I don't know. I feel like I'm forgetting to say something. . .
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katiemccabeswife · 5 months
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Selflessness (Leah Williamson x FosterMum!Reader)
You always put your kids first but can’t miss the return of Leah back to football.
Another 4.7k words 😮‍💨, also how gorgeous is Leah is that photo? PSA; I have not read through this as it it 1:30 in the morning so I am hoping grammaly as done it’s job 👍🏼
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You had been seeing Leah for a few months now but you were still too nervous to tell her about your ‘part-time job’. Of course, she knew that you were a professional dance teacher but she didn’t know that you had a second ‘job'.
It was one that fell into your lap and you couldn’t turn it down. You had all the qualifications to look after children including medical certificates and you had always dreamed of being a mother. Being a lesbian meant that that would be harder than it was if you were straight and when you came across an article about the lack of foster parents in the London area, you decided to sign yourself up.
It took a long few months to get the remaining qualifications needed and go through the training programs but you always had your eye on the target and didn’t mind waiting a few more months if that meant that you were the safest hands a child could be in.
You had your first placement 2 years ago and ever since then your home has never been silent and your heart has always been full. Some children only stayed with you overnight, some stayed a few months, and some were more introverted than others but you always put 110% into making sure they felt comfortable when staying with you.
When you met Leah at the grocery store you were a mess. A particularly troubled child had been staying with you for about a fortnight and had just begun to open up to you when his mother came out of rehab. She had done the necessary lessons and paperwork whilst in the facility and so as soon as she was released, Theo had to move back in with his mother. He had confided in you that he was concerned about moving back in with her and that he was scared she would disappear again but there was nothing you could legally do to calm his anxiety.
The night at the grocery store was the night he went back to his mother’s and you were worried sick about the 7-year-old boy who cried in your arms. You knew you didn't look your best but you needed to restock your pantry after having a farewell feast for Theo.
You were dressed in pyjama pants and a hoodie with sleeves covered in tears and snot. Your hair was thrown into a haphazard ponytail and your eyes were red from both crying and rubbing.
You stood staring at the empty spot where the Oreos normally sit and a fresh set of tears began to roll down your cheeks. You never would have cried over something as trivial as not being able to buy a snack but your emotions were all over the place and you really wanted your comfort food.
You had fallen into a squat with your hands over your eyes, trying to hide the tears when a hand fell on your back, "Are you alright?"
You looked up to see a beautiful blond looking down at you concerned, you pointed pathetically to the empty spot and quickly realised how pathetic it was and quickly stood up, "I am so sorry," You laughed at yourself and wiped away your tears, "I am a mess right now and I really wanted some Oreos and they're out and," You tried to laugh it off again but it sounded more like a cry.
The tall blue-eyed woman reached into her basket and held out a pack of Oreos to you, "You can have mine if you'd like?" She offered kindly.
You rested your hand over your heart and looked at her like she was a miracle worker, "No, I couldn't you had them first. You keep them, I'll be fine I'm just- this is humiliating," You laughed at yourself and took a deep breath, "I am perfectly fine and you can keep the Oreos but thank you for the offer," You smiled appreciatively.
The woman was still looking at you concerningly, "Trust me it's, I shouldn't really be eating them anyways," She spoke as if it were secret and you naturally assumed she was watching her weight or something and when you noticed how fit she was you looked at her in awe.
"You are so perfect," You nodded at her and she looked even more confused, "You keep those Oreos and you eat all of them," You ordered.
The blonde laughed and seemingly caught on, "No, no, I really shouldn't I'm an athlete so I really should not eat the Oreos. Trust me you have them." She thrust them into your basket, "Seriously, take them," She used her 'captain voice' and you felt like you had no other choice.
Overcome with gratitude you thanked her sheepishly, "Thank you for being so kind. Again, I'm so sorry for being such a mess," You gestured to your hair and outfit and missed the way she looked at you as if you were dressed to the nines.
"And if I'm giving you the Oreos I think it's only fair you give me your number..." She trailed off trying to test the waters.
You examined her face to see if she was being serious, "Umm, yeah? I guess sure." You nodded and tried to convince yourself that this was actually happening.
You grabbed her phone which she presented to you and added your number and name; y/n &lt;3. She took it back and smirked at you, "I will be sure to ask you how the Oreos taste, y/n," She teased.
You gained a bit of confidence to flirt back, "I'll be sure to respond..." You waited for her to tell you her name.
"Leah," She caught on.
"I'll be sure to tell you how delicious these Oreos are, Leah," You don't know where the confidence surged from but you winked at her before moving past her to continue your shopping.
From there on, you and Leah messaged back and forth and she joked about your emotional state at the grocery store and teased her about her attraction to you when you looked like rubbish. Now 4 months later and a shocking surprise later (finding out that Leah was in fact a world-known football star) you were trying to find the words to tell her that you wouldn't be able to attend her returning game from her ACL injury.
You had taken in two little girls a week ago, Vienna was 5 and her little sister Lilah was 2. The girls were supposed to have a visit with their father at the time of the game but their caseworker went to inspect the house and found him surrounded by bottles of alcohol therefore she had to cancel the visit.
The only other option was to bring the girls to the game and you were sure Vienna would love the atmosphere but you weren't sure how Lilah would deal. That and the fact that you would have to tell Leah the fact that you were a foster parent, not that you're embarrassed of your job but you were very aware of the fact that many people couldn't handle the inflexibility and last-minute change in plans that came with either being with or being a foster parent and you didn't want to lose what you had with Leah.
You were bought out of your thoughts by a tugging on your pant leg. Lilah was looking at you curiously, she could only speak limited words and since being in your care she limited the number of words she shared with you even further. You picked her up and put her on your hip, "Would like to go see a football game?" You asked, not expecting a response.
You were met with clapping from the toddler and a smile on her face and took that for a yes. You wandered over to where Vienna was doing Just Dance on the TV and put Lilah down to join her sister. You cheered both the girls on and laughed at Vienna's confidence in her dance moves, she had been quite the opposite of her sister and seemed to flourish in your care. The girl's social worker said that she was extremely introverted and had barely ever spoken to her but after only a day being in your hands she thrived and it seemed she almost never stopped talking.
Once the dance was finished you applauded the girls to which Vienna bowed and Lilah copied her sister, "That was fantastic! Where did you learn to dance like that?" You congratulated them and bent to a squat to be more their height.
Vienna blushed and swung her arms sheepishly, "My momma," She responded and your heart warmed, the girls had been in an accident while their mother was driving and she hadn't made it out of the car. Their father hadn't taken the news well and turned to drinking which landed the girls in your care.
"Well, I think she would be so proud of how well you dance," You complimented to which she beamed and Lilah clapped her hands, "Hey, would you like to go to a real-life football game?" You offered with your hands out.
Vienna ran over to you, slapped your hands and screamed, "YES!" She then took off running around the living room pretending to play with an imaginary ball.
"Wow! Well, we will have to get ready won't we?" You gave the girls a chance to make their own choice, "Would you like me to pick you out an outfit or would you like to pick your own out?"
Vienna seemed to think for a moment before deciding that she was going to dress herself. You encouraged her decisions and helped her get dressed before helping Lilah into her own clothes, "You girls look beautiful! I think you picked a better outfit than I ever could," You commended, "Right, I need to make a phone call and get dressed, how about your guys go and do 1 more dance and then we'll hop in the car and go, is that ok?"
Lilah clapped once again but spoke up for the first time that day, "YES!"
Your jaw dropped in shock before you clapped for the girl, "Yes!" You cheered, "Alright, I will be 4 minutes, off you go," You smiled as they ran to the living room holding hands.
You walked into your room, picked out your own outfit and rung up Leah. Once the phone was ringing you bit your thumbnail as you waited, anxious for the coming conversation.
Leah's cheerful voice came through the speaker and you found your anxiety slipping away, "Hey, y/n/n what's up?" You could hear the girls in the background and assumed that they were already in the changerooms.
"Hey Lee, umm would I be able to get 2 extra tickets to the game? I have umm a couple friends who came over unexpectedly and I can't leave them here alone and I really want to come to your game but I completely understand if it's too late but if it is, I am so sorry but I won't be able to come but I will be cheering you from here and-"
Your rambling was cut off by Leah laughing, "Of course, y/n/n I'll get it sorted. Don't worry about it," You let out a breath of relief.
"Thank god, thank you so much Leah. I will make sure to be cheering you on extra loud, and I'm sure my sidekicks will be as well," You laughed.
"Will I get to meet your sidekicks?" She teased, "It's only fair if I'm getting them free seats," She egged on.
You laughed nervously, "Umm, I'm sure they would be delighted to meet you," You noticed Lilah walking into your room, "Hey, I've gotta go, I wanna beat the traffic but I'll see you there, yeah?"
"Of course, see you soon," You bid farewell and hung up the phone, turning your attention to the little girl.
"You ready to go!" You picked Lilah up when she nodded and headed to get your things together, making sure you had enough snacks and water for the girls before herding them out the door and into your car.
The trip was spent singing various songs including Adele and Taylor Swift and the girls were buzzing by the time you reached the Emirates. Vienna forced you to skip in but you had to ask her to hold your hand, not wanting her to get lost. You made your way into the family and friends section. You were glad that Leah's mum couldn't make it to this game as you weren't overly eager to explain your situation to Leah, let alone her mum.
You had spent the time before the match running around with girls, trying to wear them out enough so they wouldn't feel the need to during the game. Once the players had started to line up in the tunnel you were just coming out of the bathroom with the girls, grateful for perfect timing and quickly made your way to your seats. Leah was only slightly worried when she didn't see you in the stands when she headed out to the bench.
You ended up having a spare chair due to Lilah wanting to be in your hold. You stood up when the teams started to walk out holding Lilah in one arm and having your other arm occupied by Vienna clinging on whilst standing on her seat. Even though Leah wasn't in the starting lineup, she was going to come on in the second half but you cheered on the girls you knew were close to her and Vienna was more than happy to help, Lilah sat in your arms confused but unbothered.
When the half-time whistle went you quickly got to your feet and walked briskly to the bathroom after Vienna told you she needed to use the toilet. After cleaning up you took the girls over to an open area and continued to let them run around and made sure Vienna knew that she would have to be stationary for another 45 minutes.
Leah's concern grew when she still couldn't find you in the crowd during half time and she became slightly pissed off that you'd told her you were coming, to get an extra 2 seats, and you weren't even there. Then she grew sad that you couldn't bother showing up to her first game in almost a year.
You had just settled Vienna again when the whistle blew for the commencement of that match and you cheered on the girls once again as the ball got kicked into play. Leah had gone over the rules of football with you a few times but you were still confused over the tackling and offside rules so you just cheered and booed when the Arsenal fans did.
However, when you saw Leah stepping up to the sideline and her number coming up on the substitution board in green, you stood up on your own and screamed as loud as you could causing a ripple effect throughout the stadium. Leah didn't turn around when she heard someone that sounded an awful lot like you cheer because she was in her head about you not being here and her being about to play the sport she loved for the first time in almost a year.
Every time Leah had the ball or made a successful tackle you and Vienna were on your feet cheering and even Lilah managed to expel something resembling a cheer, the poor girl being on the verge of sleep. Leah felt truly alive for the first time in 9 months, of course, she was alive throughout the course of the rehab but felt like she was only living so she could make it to this moment and now that she was in the moment she felt like she could run forever.
Once the game ended Leah had racked up 25 minutes of playing time, an assist and Arsenal won another 3 points for the ladder. She was elated and could feel the fans felt the same way throughout the stadium, especially through her teammates who were glad to have their teammate back on the pitch.
She took one last chance and looked over to the family and friends section to scan for your face and her elation only grew when she spotted it in the crowd. Her elation turned to confusion though when she caught sight of the toddler on your hip and the child you were dancing with. She was not aware you had any children nor any nieces and she was pretty sure she would recognise any of her teammate's kids or relatives and these children's faces were not ones she had seen before.
She started the trek over to you and once you caught sight of her you had to slightly shake your head and gesture to the tunnel. You weren't allowed to let the girls' faces be on camera and you didn't want anyone to witness the conversation you were about to endure with Leah.
You were trying to convince a security guard that you were meeting Leah in the tunnel but he was not having a bar of it, "Please sir, she'll be waiting for me. I'm already in trouble, just let me through!" You were growing frustrated and the girls were picking up on it. Vienna was tugging your hand as she wanted to go run on the pitch and Lilah was getting fussy as she was starting to get over tired.
You didn't see Leah walk in but she had spotted you a minute ago and had to take in what she was seeing for a minute. She had known you for 4 months and you had never mentioned any children in your life but it did make sense that you had kids, sometimes you would have to cancel dates very last minute but you always made sure to set another one up shortly after and apologised profusely.
"Hey, it's alright. She's with me," Leah made herself known and the guard backed off cautiously. Her attention was on your face and could see how you instantly relaxed but she could also see the toddler clinging to your shirt.
Vienna tugged on your shirt and gestured you to get down to your height and as much of a concern the conversation you had to have with Leah was, your kids came first so you bent down and waited for Vienna to speak her mind, "Was that one of the girls on the pitch?" She asked excitedly.
You stroked her arm and nodded with matching enthusiasm, "Yeah she was, she even helped them score a goal!" Vienna seemed pleased with your answer and made her way over to Leah.
You held your breath but let her do her thing. Leah looked to you when she gestured for Leah to bend down, just as you had a minute ago, and you nodded in permission, "Hello lovely, what's your name?" Leah asked.
"My name's Vienna, y/n/n is my step-in mummy!" Your heart warmed at the girl's claim, "I saw you play out on the big pitch!" She reached around to Leah's back and patted it gently, "You did a very good job, y/n/n and I cheered soo loud when you went on, even Lilah cheered!" She exclaimed pointing back towards you and her sister.
"Thank you, darling, I'm actually pretty sure I heard you cheering for me, you were very loud!" Leah complimented to which Vienna giggled.
"Hey V, why don't you take this and sit over there for a minute, I wanna talk to Leah. Is that ok?" You offered her a colouring book and some textas.
"Ok!" She took both and skipped over to where a table and chair were randomly set up.
"Hey..." You rocked slightly as Lilah had fallen asleep.
"Hi," Leah said with a tone of confusion.
"Umm so- yeah," Your free hand came out as if you were about to explain and then it dropped back to your side when you couldn't find the words.
Leah raised her eyebrows before looking between the girls and you.
"I foster kids in my spare time," You tried to joke but then heard how it sounded out loud and immediately began to backtrack, "Not in my spare time, that was stupid, I don't have spare time anymore. I foster kids! All the time, except when I'm not then I'm either working or with you but sometimes I do all three! And I didn't tell you; not because I'm embarrassed of my job but because I am so aware of the fact that many people can't handle the inflexibility and last-minute change in plans that comes with either being with or being a foster parent and I always feel so bad when I have to cancel plans but them I'm like there is a literal child who needs somewhere to stay and someone to take care of them and it makes me feel better but then I'm like, Leah! I didn't want to lose you because I know you're gonna have a busy schedule now that your back playing and I didn't want you to feel bad about calling this off because of what I do and-" You were running out of breath and were on the verge of tears when Leah bought you into a hug, keeping clear of the child perched on your hip.
Once you caught your breath and the hug broke off Leah grabbed your face between her hands, "You are a bloody amazing woman." She stated and you blushed, "I can not believe how selfless you are, you are doing something so incredible for these kids and you still take into account how I would feel? Of course, I wouldn't call this off because you chose to take in kids who need somewhere to stay! If anything it makes me love you more!" She didn't even register what she was saying until she said it. That didn't mean she regretted it.
She crashed her lips into yours and you reciprocated but broke free quickly, aware of the child in your arms and the other one not even 4 meters away from you. You were still slightly teary, her beautiful confession not helping, "I love you too," You laughed but quickly quietened when Lilah stirred in your arms, "Umm, would you like to come back to mine? I'll have to put these two down but it should only take 10 minutes,"
Leah was quick to agree and ran to get her kit from the changing room and had a fast shower. She sent off a quick message to the Arsenal girls excusing herself from post-match celebrations. She met you next to your car and noticed that you only had one kid running circles around you, "Lils was fast asleep so I've just put her in her seat, ready to go?" You asked Leah who nodded.
"Is Leah coming over to our house?" Vienna asked when you were clipping her into her car seat.
You glanced at Leah sitting in the passenger seat before nodding to Vienna, "Yeah, is that alright with you?" You were worried that she wouldn't be ok having someone else in the house with you and knew that if that was the case, you would have to once again reschedule to meet up with her.
"As long as she tells me a bedtime story!" Vienna giggled.
"I'm sure if you asked really nicely, she would be more than happy too!" She was content with your answer and broke out in humming a random tune. You laughed at her and went to the driver's side to take your girls home.
The drive home was fairly quiet as Lilah was asleep but Vienna kept humming her tune and you and Leah couldn't help but laugh when she got really passionate about her song.
"McDonald's for dinner?" You asked Leah who nodded her head. You turned your head slightly to catch the gaze of Vienna, "Hey V, do you want to get McDonald's for dinner?"
"Um yes please!" She spoke as if it were obvious, "Can I get a nugget happy meal?"
You nodded, "Umm of course?" You responded in the same tone she had before.
After teasing Leah about her bland food choices, Vienna talking Leah's ear off about nothing in particular in between eating her happy meal and Lilah having a bottle and being put to sleep, it was finally Vienna's time to go to sleep.
"Alrighty, teeth are brushed and jammies are on, what's next V?" You asked and she seemed to remember your conversation in the car and ran over to Leah who watched the scene in awe.
"Excuse me, Leah?" She patted her knee to get her attention, "Would you please tell me a bedtime story?"
Leah gasped, "I would love to have the honour!" She spoke proudly.
Vienna dragged her to her bedroom and quickly got under her sheets, "Could you please tell me a football story?" She asked politely.
"Those are my favourite stories, would you like to hear about when my team won a competition against all of the other countries in Europe?" Vienna nodded dutifully.
"Isn't there like a billion countries in Europe?" She was 5, give her a break.
Leah nodded, "Almost," She went off to tell her a shortened version of the Eruos in 2022 and Vienna was enraptured by the story but was slowly falling asleep.
"You must be really good if you beat a billion other countries, I like you, you're my favourite footballer," Vienna decided and patted Leah's hand that was resting on her leg. You watched the scene from the side with hearts in your eyes.
Once the story was over Leah bid Vienna goodnight and got up off the bed so you could say your goodnights. You made sure to tuck her in extra tight and checked under her bed for monsters and after concluding that there were none Vienna was ready to go to sleep, "Goodnight, munchkin, sweet dreams," You kissed her lightly on the forehead.
She returned the favour by kissing your nose and pulled in for another secret, "I really like Leah, she's pretty," She giggled.
You smiled at the small child and nodded, "I know," You laughed with your foster daughter and wished her goodnight once again flipping off the lights and turning on the night light, "Night night V," You waved.
"Night night y/n/n," She dozed off.
You left the door open slightly and jumped when you saw Leah waiting on the opposite side of the door, "Jesus, Lee," You pulled her into your bedroom not wanting to wake either girl, "Listen, I truly am sorry about not telling you about all this. I was just scared and didn't want to lose you is all,"
Leah took you in her arms, "I understand, love. Don't worry about it," She gave you a kiss on the side of your head and pulled away, "I loved watching you interact with them, you're so good at it. And you look beautiful while doing it," She flirted and pecked your lips.
You moved your arms to wrap around her neck, "I love watching you interact with them, didn't know you had it in you, Captain Grumpy Pants," You teased as Leah was known for her stern facial expressions.
Leah looked unimpressed, "Well at least V, thinks I'm pretty," She spoke triumphantly.
You pecked her lips, "I happen to think you are very pretty," You kissed her again but let it go even further and when you had to break apart for air, "Gorgeous really," You teased.
"Stop trying to one-up a child," She chastised sarcastically.
You smirked, "You might just have to shut me up, then," You flirted but it didn't end up going much further as the two of you ended up fast asleep within minutes exhausted from playing football, cheering and taking care of two children.
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barcaatthemoon · 28 days
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end of an era || jenni hermoso x reader ||
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things don't always get better, but jenni tries to help you.
major angst warning, like implied/mentioned suicide attempt angst. proceed with caution.
everything and everyone went silent the moment you fell. it was daunting to watch back as you replayed the stream of your last game over and over again. jenni sighed as she glanced over at you. the two of you had been waiting in the doctor's office for hours now to see how your surgery had gone. both of you knew that it was going to be a long and hard road back, one that you honestly weren't even sure you'd have the chance to attempt.
"will you turn it off please?" jenni asked you. she was beyond trying to be nice about it. you got upset every single time that you watched it, and jenni hated hearing you get hit and go down again and again. she hadn't been there for that game, and it was one of her greatest regrets.
your teammates had told jenni how you had been immediately following the game. jenni almost couldn't believe it, not until she saw for herself that every ounce of happiness had been sucked out of you. you had become obsessive, attempting to figure out where you could have done something to reduce the damage. rather than listen to the countless people who had assured you time and time again that it was a freak accident, you still searched for an answer.
"it's not like i have anything else to do," you grumbled. jenni was really starting to get on your nerves. she was always a little annoying, but it had gone from being endearing to infuriating. "they're just going to tell me that i'm finished. my career is over, even if i can make a comeback. it will be too fucking late, jenni."
"no. no, stop talking like that. you're gonna be fine," jenni told you. oh how you wished that the doctors hadn't made her out to be a liar. jenni believed her words right up until the surgeon came in with a team of people that neither of you had ever seen before.
you felt numb as they gave the time frame of your possible return. it would be well over a year since you required multiple surgeries to fix the tears and breaks. you didn't understand how you had fucked up your body so badly, and it was obvious that jenni didn't either. however, you weren't left wondering for very long. the doctor mentioned old injuries that hadn't healed properly, claiming that your leg was a ticking time bomb that had been resting for nearly a decade.
"that was a waste of fucking time," you grumbled as you rushed towards the car. you were on crutches, so you weren't really moving that fast. jenni had slowed her pace down signficantly to keep up with you. she was carrying your bags, something that you only let her do today because she normally did it for you anyway.
"no, we have a timeline now. that's a good first step towards getting you back to where you need to be." jenni sounded so optimistic still, but you knew that it didn't matter. you'd miss the olympics, and you'd definitely have to retire by the next world cup. your time was running out, and it had essentially been cut in half by your injury.
"jenni, i'll be lucky if i ever get to step foot on a pitch again. let's just get home. i need a fucking drink." you got into the car, ignoring the look that jenni gave you. she was worried about you, despite you technically not doing anything worrisome yet.
you were depressed, and rightfully so. jenni had hoped that the doctors would have some good news for you, but they hadn't. your mood reflected that in the coming weeks as you moped around until you were cleared to start your physical therapy and rehab. your schedule for that was pretty light, especially since you had at least two more surgeries before you were in the clear.
jenni was great, and despite it being her off season, she didn't go back to spain. instead, she had moved temporarily to america to take care of you. you could tell that the move was hard on her, but she couldn't think of letting you stay by yourself. she was afraid that you'd do something stupid or dangerous if she left you alone.
you hated it, and because of that, you started to hate her as well. you hated that jenni kept looking at you like you were made of glass. you hated that she touched you so gently whenever all you wanted was for her to hold you down against the mattress and make you forget the past four months of your life. you hated jenni, and even more so, you hated that she never showed any resentment towards you.
there was always only ever going to be so much that jenni could handle. ten months out of your injury with only one more surgery to go, it all came crashing down around the two of you. the cracks in jenni's patience with you were starting to show, so she had taken a little vacation to spain without you. it wasn't for more than a few days, but it was long enough for your anger to betray you and turn into complete despair.
you had a family history of being fucked up. addiction, depression, anxiety, and a long list of other issues had plagued nearly every other member of your family for as long as you could remember. your parents had both tried to prepare you for the worst of it, and for a time, you thought that you had seen it. you had forgone taking your pain medicine because you had been terrified fo getting hooked on it. there never should have been so many pills in the house, but jenni knew she couldn't have just taken your extra ones with her to spain.
you wanted to call jenni, but she'd talk you down. you didn't feel like you deserved it. you had treated her so badly for nearly a year, to the point where she left the continent to get away from you. however, you believed that you owed her at least a text. something to thank her for taking care of you and apologize for being such a piece of shit for so long.
the time zone different meant that jenni should have been fast asleep. you didn't count on jenni being wide awake at 2 am. how could you have known that she hadn't been sleeping well since you got hurt. the vacation to spain should have been relaxing, but jenni couldn't quiet the voice in the back of her head warning her that you still weren't doing any better mentally. that was why she hadn't even finished reading your text before she was calling some of your american teammates to check up on you, hopeful that it wasn't too late.
"i'm here! i'm here!" jenni was nearly tripping over herself as she ran into your hospital room. she stopped when she saw you. you had expected her to start yelling at you or something, but instead she just broke down in front of you.
"i'm sorry," you apologized. jenni tried to tell you not to be sorry, but she couldn't get it out. all she could do is kneel by your bed and cry as your hand weakly ran through your hair. "it should have worked."
"i-is that how you really feel?" jenni asked you. you realized that wasn't at all what she wanted to hear, and suddenly you were filled with guilt. all of that hate and anger that you had felt before came back, but this time it was fully directed towards yourself.
"yes," you whispered. jenni wiped her eyes and stood up as she stared down at you. "i've been awful to you. how can you still love me?"
"are you fucking stupid?" jenni regretted her words as soon as they left her mouth. for the first time in months, jenni finally saw you cry. "shit. shit, shit, shit, c'mere. i'm sorry, i didn't mean it like that. i love you, i want to see you get better."
"jenni, i'm not sure that there is a better. what if i come back and this happens all over again? i think that i need to retire and take some time by myself," you told her.
"a-are you breaking up with me?" jenni asked you. there was a flash of anger in her eyes, one that completely overshadowed the hurt. "i took care of you for almost a year. i waited for you to get better, to be yourself again because i love you so much. you can't just make a decision like this by yourself, not when you aren't in the right headspace."
"jenni, they're keeping me here on a hold for a while until i can prove that i'm okay. i'm selling my place here. i don't want us to be over, but i think that if you can find someone who actually deserves you while i'm gone, then you should go for it. and if you don't by the time that i'm better, then i'd really like you to consider letting me come back to you," you told her. jenni didn't like the sound of that, but it wasn't a clear breakup. it was a break, if anything, and jenni knew for a fact that she wouldn't find someone else unless you actually forced her to. "i've already been let out of my contracts, they're just waiting to make the announcements."
"i wish that you'd reconsider this, but i am glad that you can make rational decisions," jenni said. you nodded as you gave her hand a little squeeze. there was a chair by your bed, but jenni crawled right in next to you. she had a couple days to stay with you before you were moved to the facility that you'd call home for as long as it took you to get better. jenni didn't know when you'd be back, but she kept a calendar to keep count of the days you were gone.
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coco-loco-nut · 2 months
Text
We Can’t Be Friends
Pairing: George Russel x Reader
Summary: George’s girlfriend, a former child actor, is not well liked by the public
TW: mentions of alcohol and drug abuse, implied child exploitation
A/n: going off of the more popular interpretation of the song (ari vs the public)
requests open!🫶 masterlist
———————
You just finished filming a short interview in a docuseries with some of your former colleagues, those who fell into the same trap and downfall as you did. You prefer not to air everything out, but you knew your statement would support the others.
The industry basically forced you into a drug and alcohol addiction, one that you thankfully beat, but you went from someone who was once loved to someone hated, just from how the media spun your name.
You met George at a hospital event -you now work as a biochemist and bioengineer- and he immediately recognized his childhood crush. You dated for a year before feeling strong enough to go public, but ever since he posted a very cute picture of you, the hate has started again.
“I’ll make a statement asking them to leave you alone,” George offers but you shake your head no. He hates seeing you upset, but both of you didn’t expect the backlash on you.
“They won’t understand, they could never even try. They will never know what it was like to grow up like that, even the docuseries won’t help,” you start to dismiss the thought.
“We can’t do nothing,” he tries to reason, wanting to protect you.
“I don’t want to tiptoe around the public, but I don’t want to hide, either way I’m feeding this fire,” you groan, running your hand through your hair as you pace the room. You had to call off of work today, the entrance to your townhome being blocked by paparazzi.
“The story is gonna die, and we’ll be alright,” George stands up and pulls you into a hug. In your mind you picture the public liking you again, waiting for their love again.
A few days later, George drags you out of the house for lunch, you had only been leaving for work. The two of you step out, a reporter immediately coming up to you. You ignore the first few, sitting in your silence.
“It’s just me and you, Baby girl,” George whispers to you, supporting you however you choose to respond.
“Y/n, is it true that you have been in and out of rehab for the past year? You are in and out of hospitals,” one reporter, who always hounds you, asks causing you to whirl around. You don’t want to argue, but you don’t want to bite, so you choose a confusing answer.
“You’ve got me misunderstood, but at least I look this good,” you smirk, watching their face scrunch in confusion, gripping their paper and pen, before continuing your walk.
The next day a clip of one of your short interviews drops, taken while you were in college, as a trailer for the docuseries release the following week.
~-~-~-
I don’t like how this industry painted me, but I’m still here hanging, just not what they made me. It’s almost like a daydream sometimes, finally leaving that world. I feel so seen, I am everything that I defined myself as, not all that the industry made me be. My truth and I may always sit in silence, but one day I hope I am brave enough to say it out loud. For now, it’s only me on the road after recovery, but maybe that’s all I need.
~-~-~-
buzzfeed.com/uk
A list of every child actor we need to apologize to after watching “Drugged: The Truth Behind the Lives of Child Actors”
1. Y/n Y/l/n
~-~-~-
“Are you sure you want to go out there?” George asks, looking at the crowds of journalists. You nod, tired of being silent and waiting for things to be better, not caring about feeding the fire anymore.
“Let’s go,” you release a shaky breath, stepping out behind your boyfriend as he walks you to work.
“Y/n! Anything to comment regarding the documentary that’s been released and the allegations made by your former colleagues?” A journalist asks, the rest hoarding, pens at the ready.
“Actually, I do. You owe us an apology. Villainizing children who needed someone like you to expose how awful our working conditions were, that’s sick and cruel. You wrote lies about us, and instead of apologizing, you want to ask us for statements and exploit our names more? You’re sick. We can’t be friends,” you chem them out before continuing on your way to work. A part of you will always wait for their love, but you are tired of waiting for them to like you.
“You’re a badass. I hope they will see you are the biochemist and bioengineer, not the child actor. You’ve come so far and I’m so proud,” George says once your breathing steadies from the adrenaline.
“Thank you, Georgie,” a small part of you wants to flip them off behind you, just like you would’ve done ten years ago, but you don’t, finally moving forward.
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calummss · 6 months
Text
Blessed Mornings | Marshall Mathers
masterlist
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summary: three years after marshall’s rehab you both wake up to a peaceful morning reminding you how lucky you are
pairing: fem! reader x marshall mathers/eminem
words: 600
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It was quiet when you had awoken from your sleep, the sound of Marshall’s breathing in your left ear as you slowly batted your eyelids. The moment you opened your eyes you were happy. Extremely happy and proud like watching a baby take its first steps without their mother. They were in total control and when babies realise they're in control of their own movements, well that is something many wish to witness. It was April 20th, 2011. Three years. Three years in which you could’ve started waking up alone to an empty bed, only the memories of your love keeping you company instead of your love.
You tried removing Marshall’s arm from your waist, wanting to make breakfast and bring it to bed. It was a special day and a special day called for special treatment. But you should’ve known that escaping a sleepy Marshall was impossible. As soon as you lifted his arm, he snaked it back around your waist with a deep groan, nuzzling his face into the crook of your neck as his warm breath ricocheted off your skin.
‘Em baby, I was trying to make you breakfast,’ you whispered, stroking his head as you realised that you weren’t going to be able to leave.
‘Please stay here.’ His quavering voice softly erupted.
‘Fine,’ you said, knowing you wouldn’t have been able to say no anyway. ‘At least loosen your grip so I can turn and you can lay on my chest.’
Without protest Marshall withdrew his arm from your waist and supported himself with his other arm and waited for you to turn your body, his head falling onto your chest, nuzzling his head back into a comfy position, his arm over your waist again. You continue to gently stroke his hair as you cradled him, slowly falling back asleep for a little while longer.
When you woke up again, Marshall was reluctant to let go of you but was promised his favourite pancakes so he eventually let go of you, reminding you how bad he just wanted to stay in bed and cuddle.
In the kitchen you got all the ingredients you needed and started mixing the pancake batter, making sure to have a few pancakes with chocolate chips. As you plated the stack, Marshall came through the door, his torso no longer bare but draped in a long sleeved shirt and a pair of sweatpants.
‘These look incredible as always,’ He came up towards the counter, sliding the plate towards him.
‘Wait!’ You half yelled, grabbing the can of whipped cream and bent over the table to start adding the cream on top of the pancakes, spelling out the number three. ‘Happy three years, Em. I’m so so proud of you and I’m so happy you’re still alive and that I get to wake up every day knowing you’re still with me. Three down and many more to go.’
‘I don’t deserve you.’ Marshall pulled you into a tight hug, so tight you could feel your heartbeat transfer to his chest. ‘I love you so damn much.’
‘You deserve me. Just as I deserve you.’
‘Shit man, you’re gonna make me cry.’
‘Thank you for being here.’ You kissed him, feeling his uncertainty through his body. He hated being vulnerable and hated crying especially in front of other people.
‘I fucking love you.’
‘I fucking love you too.’
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elliesmistress · 2 months
Text
EPISODE 1: PILOT
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WARNINGS: 18+, heavy drug usage (cocaine, weed, alcohol, etc), oral sex (R, E, D, A, ETC), tribbing, overdoses (reader), mentions of overdoses, angst, EVERYONE WILL BE IN COLLEGE AS EUPHORIA IS SET IN HIGHSCHOOL!, mentions of self harm, Jules will be transgender (same in the show, except sex won't be with her), shoplifting, mentions of death, NATE and his family will most likely be left out of this completely and set with new characters that are less toxic, dealer!ellie (sometimes), drug deals, swearing, less abusive relationships but still toxic, mentions of rehab, rehab (detox), death, degradation, toxic sex, rough sex, strap usage, strap sucking, mentioning of 9/11, lmk if I missed anything please!
a/n: this will be VERY similar to Euphoria, you will be RUE (Due to it being "your" story I will be writing it with 'I' as Rue talks). I just need to figure out where abby, dina, jesse, etc will fit into the story. I do know abby will be CAT very likely all the characters will be the exact same (besides from Nate and his parents) I've struggled with a few of the problems in Euphoria and I've written my own fic about MY addictions but I figured I'd do Euphoria too hehe, I will be removing the SA parts of the story because that's just something I don't want to have on my page. Please let me know if you want to be on the taglist whilst I actually have inspo to write :) 3.8K WORDS, spell checked and shit idk man it's like 4 hours past my bed time and 1am
I WILL BE MAKING A EUPHRIA PLAYLIST FOR EACH CHAPTER!
Taglist: @snowy-vee , @vqxen @pedropascalsbbg
PRESENT DAY
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"I was once happy, content, sloshing around in my own private primordial pool." I am standing in front of hundreds of people who are here listening to my story—to say the very least, I was nervous. I always have been a fucking addict, and now I'm telling my story of how I recovered from this fucking disease that ruined my fucking life.
"Then one day, for reasons beyond my control, I was repeatedly crushed." I blink my eyes, looking at the floor, struggling to find the right words: "over and over by the cruel cervix of my mother, Grace."
"I put up a good fight, but I lost, for the first time, and definitely not my last... I was born three days after 9/11."
Memories flood back to when I could hear the TV going on the day I was born.
"I can hear you; I can hear you; the rest of the world hears you; and the people who knocked these buildings down will hear all of us soon." The unknown man says on the TV that hearing the words "USA, USA!" being chanted over and over again made me cry as a baby. Those chants will forever haunt me.
"My mom and dad spent two days in the hospital, holding me under the soft glow of the television, watching the towers fall over and over again, until the feelings of grief gave way to numbness." I shift uncomfortably in the silence of the audience, glancing at my good friends Jesse and Ellie, who indicate for me to keep talking. A soft chuckle comes from my lips as I continue on with the story.
"And then," I take a deep breath, "without warning, we moved to a friendly neighborhood in the suburbs, to where a middle-class child, me to be exact, was looking up at the ceiling, counting those fucking numbers like I could fucking see them. Over and over again. 'thirteen... fourteen... fifteen... sixteen."
"My mother looked up at that ceiling like I was fucking crazy; the words she said echo through my dumb brain still: 'What are you looking at, y/n?'" "I kept counting, trying my hardest to ignore her. She said to me, 'y/n, look at me."
I chuckle. "I bet you all know where this is going. I kept counting, but from the start," and my smile dropped immediately.
"I remember breaking down and crying when my mother tried to snap me out of it. I wanted... I had nothing but to cry, so that's what I did. I sat in a doctor's office a few weeks later with my mother crying next to me as the doctor said I could be suffering from obsessive-compulsive disorder, attention deficit disorder, general anxiety disorder, and possible bipolar disorder." I put my hand up close to the mic to cup it. "But I was a little too young to tell," I said in a joking tone, cracking a laugh from the crowd. "Y'all get me; y'all fucking get me."
"With this being said, I was put on medication to treat half of the disorders I had, and to be honest, I don't remember much between the ages of 8 and 12. Just that the world moves fast and my brain moves so fucking slowly."
"I would sit my fucking ass in class every day and try my hardest to listen to what that fucking teacher was trying to teach, but sometimes I would focus on my breathing a little too hard. I'd die. That teacher held a bag to my mouth to calm my breathing, though it never really helped. I remember trying to outrun my anxiety every day, looking in the mirror and trying to push my stomach in so I wouldn't look "fat."
"I would constantly get messages from people telling me they wanted to kill me, drug me, make fun of me, and bully me. My mother knew something was up and constantly asked me what was wrong, but I always gave the same response: 'I'm just fucking exhausted."
AGE 19 (college years)
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"You said the doctor was in our network. How could he suddenly be out of network?" I hear my mother say as I walk out of my room into the kitchen, "I can't afford it" Grace says.
"did you see the beauty queen who got acid thrown in her face?" My sister says as I begin to lean on the dinning room table. "Mm, what? No" I say, turning my attention to her and out of my trance. "it's pretty fucked up." She says holding up her phone. "Hey, Mom, you got any tampons?" I turned my head to face her as she looked at the documents in her hand, I knew full well I wasn't going to be getting tampons but she didn't need to know that shit.
"in my bathroom, under the sink." She replies back, I swiftly make my way to the bathroom.
I enter her bathroom and cough as I open her medicine cabinet to take a few of her Alprazolam (XANAX) pills.
I would do this countless times, and surprisingly at some point, you make a choice about who you are and what you want in life.
I pretend to flush the toilet and I look at the picture in my mother's bathroom- it had my dad and my Mom on it on their wedding day.
I look at myself in the mirror washing my hands and putting on sunglasses to hide my pupils that are almost as big as my actual eye itself- I get out of the bathroom to go back into the kitchen
"alright, Jayda, let's roll." I say to my sister as she looks at me and frowns, probably these fucking sunglasses.
"y/n, did you eat breakfast?" Grace says, moving the phone away from her mouth. "I had coffee!" I yell out, opening the front door and making my way out.
Jayda and I begin to walk down the sidewalk, she turns her attention onto me and asks what's with the sunglasses.
"what sunglasses?" I say and chuckle, Jayda laughs with me.
We both make our way to the bus and wait for it to arrive, once it arrives we get on the bus and make our way to the back of the bus.
I guess... I showed up one day, without a map or a compass... Or to be honest, anyone capable of giving on iota of good fucking advice. And I know it all may seem sad, but guess what? I didn't build this system nor did I fuck it up.
I was sitting at a party, with a galaxy book to my knees and a line of cocaine, holding the perfectly rolled 5 dollar bill that had been rolled by some rando.
I snort the line of cocaine and immediately felt the pain in my nose, moving my hand up to my nose and applying pressure to where it is painful, making my breathing hitch, then speeding up my breathing in order to get rid of the pain.
My pupils immediately shot big, looking around—everything felt good, my mind at ease and nothing to worry about. I sit up with the most unreal experience, an out-of-body feeling as I struggle to get up.
"y/n, you good?" My friend Ellie attempts to hold my shoulders to steady me as I wobble slightly, I giggle and smile at her, escaping her grasp. "I'm good!"
I walk past people- everything is in slow motion, my body feels slow, my mind feels slow, and suddenly I no longer feel as high- I find another unknown substance and waste no time snorting it, sitting down on the couch.
I sat back up from the couch I was sitting at, getting offered yet another line of cocaine. I snort that cocaine as well, that leaves it hard for me to breathe, every time I take a breathe out. It feels like I'm breathing out all the oxygen I have.
And then it happens. That moment when your breath starts to slow, and every time you breathe, you breathe out all the oxygen you have. And everything stops: your heart, your lungs, then finally your brain. Then everything you feel, and wish, and want to forget, it all just sinks. And then suddenly... You give it air again, give it life again, and that's what leaves you needing more.
I smile at the figure I see besides me, her face is blurred but she's speaking to me, I feel scared. "I want to call an ambulance" I say in my mind, "but I don't wanna ruin everyone's time"
"dude get her fucking legs" I hear muffled voices, slowly waking up. It was Ellie and Jesse dragging my body to Ellie's bed, after I had passed out on the couch at that random frat party-
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I stand in a church with my hands behind my back, looking up at the ceiling waiting to graduate from rehab. Slowly making my way up the steps, I look at the lady and give her a smile and a nod before exiting the building.
"God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference." Echoing in my mind over and over again as I make my way to Ellie's car.
"Hey!" I see Ellie running up to me. I drop my bags as she pulls me into a tight hug. I smiled at her shoulder. She squeals, letting go of me and looking at my face, pulling a hair strand behind my ear.
"I've missed you," she admits. "I've missed you too."
"What about we go back to mine and we can watch a movie?" Ellie suggests that, honestly, I wanted to get home and get out to my fucking dealer. I never had intentions of staying clean, but she didn't need to know.
"Uh yeah, sure," I say, quickly breaking myself out of my own stance. She helps me with my bag, and she puts it in Joel's old, beat-up truck, and I get into the front seat. "Everyone's missed you, dude, Abby, Dina, Jesse, and Maddie. Fucking everyone, dude."
I chuckle.
-
I cuddle up with Ellie in her dad's garage as we watch Jurassic Park. I'm on top of her, listening to her breathing—she's relaxed; she's always around me.
I find myself nuzzling into her neck. She moves her head to the side, so you have better access to her neck. I softly kiss her neck; she's always so soft.
Her eyes flutter shut as I start to suck on her neck, her hands finding their way to my ass, slowly rocking me back and forth to grind on her. Ellie let out a choked moan as she felt my clothed cunt rub against her clit.
"Y/N, fuck," she moans. I smile against her neck and make my way to Ellie's lips.
I kiss her slowly, but Ellie starts to become desperate, whining into my mouth as I refuse to give her what she wants. I move my hand underneath her hoodie to find her tits; of course she's not wearing a fucking bra or shirt under her jumper. It's Ellie.
"Wait," I say, pulling down her pants and boxers in one go. I look at her swollen cunt, slowly moving my head downward to lick up her slit, making my way to her clit.
She bucks her hips up into my tongue, I moan into her cunt, and she tangles her hand in my hair, slightly tugging upwards, making me groan loudly.
"S-sh-it," her voice is choked. "Fuck, just like that," she moans, rolling her eyes back, her toes curling in her socks. "Hmm? Feel good, baby?" I say to her, slowly lifting my head up, abandoning her swollen cunt.
"Fucking don't," she threatened, and I chuckled. I push my middle finger into her soaking pussy as I attach back to her clit; her breathing gets faster, and I feel her tighten around my fingers.
"F-FUCK!" She moans loudly, and I feel her pussy conract on my finger as she cums, her fingers tugging at my hair. "A bit loud, don't you think?" I tease after letting her ride out her orgasm, and I move up to kiss her sweaty forehead. "Shut up"
"got another in you?" I smirk, taking off my pants, t-shirt, and bra. Ellie takes off her jumper, leaving us both naked. I allow Ellie to get up and let her go on top of me.
Ellie aligns her clit up with mine and moans quickly, filling the room each time Ellie moves her hips. I start to dig your nails into Ellie's back, making her groan in pain.
"Fuck, fuck, fuck," Ellie chants from the overstimulation. "C'mon, baby, I know—fuck, I know you can do it." I praise her as I feel a knot in my stomach, threatening to come undone.
Ellie moves her shoulder closer to my face. I take this as an opportunity to bite down on her shoulder, which makes her wince in pain.
"I'm going to fucking cum!" Ellie moans out. Hearing Ellie say this triggers my own orgasm, and we both cum together.
-
I sit up in bed watching Ellie sleep, and I take out my phone to look at the time.
4AM
"Fuck it," I think before opening Ellie's window slowly, climbing out her window, and making my way to my dealer's house.
-
"There's a new girl in town I think you're going to be friends with." I stand in front of my dealer, who's sitting down in his chair. "who?" I question.
"shit... I don't know, man. She came in yesterday lookin' all Sailor Moon and sh*t. I'm thinking to myself, "You look like somebody you would get along with."
"Ah, real nice, dude. Really nice, where's ash?"
"I thought you went to rehab?"
"Doesn't that mean I stayed sober?" I smiled, walking towards Ash's room with a smile. I opened his door to see him eating cereal. He puts down his bowl and looks at me.
"Shit, I thought your ass was dead."
"I thought you had Asperger's till I realized you're just a prick." I insult him. "This is a fickle industry. Y'all come and go." He chuckles.
I ask for what I want, and he hands it to me. "Sure, you don't want to try anything new?"
"Like, what?" I asked, pulling the hair out of my face.
"2-C-T-2, 2C-T-7, and 5-MeO-DIPT." "I have no idea what the fuck you just said, Ash."
"Doesn't matter, dude, this sh*t. Is fucking lit?" He holds up a bag with two unknown pills. "It's a fast-acting psychedelic. I have some similarities to LSD, but with, like, key differences. Not as visual and shit, but still a sense of distortion... I don't know what's been blowing up in Tampa, and mad people like to fuck on it."
"okay, yeah." I say, putting all the baggies in my pocket, "That'll be 120."
"Fez said he'd spot me."
"Fezco, don't spot anybody."
"Yeah, well, it's a post-rehab discount, so you should ask him." I say, pointing the middle finger at him, opening his door, and leaving.
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"Do you think my areolas look weird?" Dina says to Abby, "What the fuck, no?"
"Just the edges."
"Dina, they're fine," Abby says, taking a puff of the weed Cassie gives her.
"Fine, like, they're weird, kind of weird, or fine, like, nobody but me would ever notice what I would notice?"
"Fine, like, shut the fuck up, Dina," Cassie says, sitting up, grabbing her vape, and taking a puff. Dina scoffs, pulling up her t-shirt to cover her boobs.
"Hey ladies!" Jesse walks in. "Hey baby," Dina squeals, running to Jesse and hugging him. Abby cringes.
"Straight people, ew," she thinks to herself, looking at her phone. "Yo, you got out of rehab."
"Didn't she die?" Dina asks, and Abby shrugs.
"Yeah, I swear she died. I don't know, is Ellie coming to the party?" Jesse questions, to which Dina nods.
-
I get off my bike at home, slightly drugged up from the drugs I took earlier.
I walk into the house, softly shutting the door.
"Where were you?" My mother says, sitting at the table, Why the fuck is she up at 6 a.m.? You thought to yourself: "I went to eat," I lie. "What the fuck do you mean, you went to eat?"
"what?"
"what?" She mocks, "Don't walk away from me." She sits up from her seat, walking towards me as I walk towards my room. "You know what, y/n? I don't trust you."
"I don't know what you want me to say." It's true; I didn't know why she wanted me to say it. "I want you to tell me where you were," she says, walking quickly as I walk to my room.
"I just said I went to fucking eat!" I yell at her, "Don't you talk to me like that!" Grace says as I slam the door on her face. "Don't be slamming my doors around here."
"It was a fucking accident!" I yell out, holding my body in front of the door. "I don't care. You're not leaving this house until you take a drug test."
"I just peed!" I yell out, "Slam another door."
"Shit," I say, making my way to my bed, not knowing what to do. Every option I could do is unsafe as fuck.
Niacin, maybe. I don't know fuck, I think to myself, putting out my phone to look at the side effects.
Google
Side effects: skin flushing, extreme dizziness, vomiting, rapid heartbeat, and sometimes death.
Fuck, I can't.
"No drug site recommends doing this" I whisper to myself.
The other option is to get a non drug-addicted friend to do it for me.
About 20 minutes later, I show up at Dina's door, knocking.
"y/n!" Dina says, opening the door, smiling and hugging me, "I thought you died."
I laugh. "Can you do me a favor?" Uhm, I'm serious, bro."
"Sure, what is it, y/n?"
"Can you, uh, piss in this cup for me?" I whisper to her . "You're fucking with me, right?" She responds back, and I laugh and shrug.
Dina agrees to do it, and I enter her house to see Jesse and Abby.
"Sup Jesse," I say, fist bumping Jesse, then Abby.
"We thought you fucking died, bro. How was rehab?" Jesse says it with a genuine tone. "Yeah, it was good." I turn to Abby and ask, "How's football going?"
"Yeah, good. Thanks, uh, are you coming to that party tonight?" Abby asks, "Uhm, yeah, maybe."
"y/n" Dina grabs your attention, you move away from Jesse and Abby, and she swiftly hands you the bottle. "Here's that eyeliner."
"thank you"
-
I quietly climb through my window, grabbing my baggie of crushed cocaine, tipping some out onto my shelf, grabbing my 5 dollar note, rolling it up, and snorting a line.
"Argh," I groan, feeling it hit my nose. The same pain I've always experienced with snorting was still there—just muffled out. By this point, my nose was completely fucked, and I could hear the sound of the drugs eating away at my nose.
"Mom! I have to pee."
-
"I wish we could do this in a way that wasn't a complete invasion of my privacy." I say, cup in hand, struggling not to smile at her due to the drugs I had taken earlier on.
"Well, you lost your right to privacy after your overdose," your mom says, staring at you in the eyes.
"That was an accident." I smartly talk back, "Don't be flippy, y/n."
"Could you, at least?" Your mom turns around and says, "Thank you."
I sit down, and before "peeing" in the cup, I swiftly change it with Dina's urine as she talks. I wasn't listening to whatever the fuck she was saying... I was high as fuck, and I didn't care.
I gave her the urine sample, and she put the drug test in the container, and all of them came out negative. "I'm sorry for slamming the door earlier."
"it's okay. I forgive you. Come here." My mom says, pulling me in for a hug.
I guess... Like I said before, you get to choose who you want to be and how you want to be- the way the drugs cancelled out all my emotions was what I was looking for, no person, no nothing could compare to that feeling. Besides from drugs.
"I'm gonna stay at Dina's tonight" i say to which she agrees.
It's now 7PM, I don't know how the day went by so fast- but it did and it fucking sucked. I get a text from Ellie.
Ellie: Yo, noticed you left this morning you okay?
Me: yeah, I'm good bro. You alg?
Ellie: yep! Wanna come over tonight? Dont have to if you wanna go to the party instead
Me: I'll come over around like 11?
I find myself making my way to the party that Jesse, Dina, and Abby are going to.
Jesse and Dina have fucked off somewhere else, probably making out or fucking, and you find yourself next to Abby.
"How was rehab, y/n?" She says, breaking the tension, although I can barely hear her over the music, "Yeah, it was good!" I yell over the music.
I stand up, looking for the bathroom in an attempt to snort more, but people were already in the bathroom. "Shit," I think to myself, not paying attention to where I'm walking, accidentally bumping into this lady.
"fuck!" I yell. Looking at her, she looks like the girl Faz mentioned. "Hey, sorry." I retrace my steps.
"You're good; I'm, uh, I'm Jules," she says, and I smile, holding out my hand to shake hers. She accepts and shakes my hand.
She's got one of the most beautiful smiles you have ever seen; her smile is so bright it could light up an entire dark room, filled with nothing but sadness.
"I'm y/n" I introduce myself, to which we exchange numbers, and I make my way to Ellie's place, feeling overwhelmed from the party.
I knock on her door for Joel to answer; my pupils are dilated, and obviously I've taken some sort of drug.
"y/n... Hey, Ellie's in her room." I smile stupidly. These fucking drugs, man, I can't stop smiling . I swiftly walk past Joel and see Ellie. I smile at her, and she smiles back. "Dude, are you high?" She scoffs, "I thought... I thought you quit."
"I'm not high, Ellie, mania." I giggle; she obviously doesn't want to assume, so she wants to give me the benefit of the doubt.
"Are you coming back to college this month?" She questions. "Yeah, probably." The truth was, I didn't want to. But I knew I probably had to.
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I shall leave it at this due to how many words, etc. and idk if people will like this 😭😭
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eimids · 7 months
Text
Forgive me
Leah x Reader
Summary: Leah lashes out on reader and then tries to apologize
warnings: Angst, Leah pushes reader physically, fighting, mean Leah, fluffy smut in the end.
"Can you just shut the fuck up, I'm so fucking tired oh your shit like can't you just shut up for a minute," Leah yelled at you.
It was her first game after her ACL injury. The game was against Manchester United and it was making Leah nervous. She obviously wasn't in the starting 11, because it was her first match after a big injury. Luckily she was subbed in quite early on the second half. Arsenal was on the lead with 1-0, Alessia being the one to make the goal.
The game seemed fine to you, but you were wrong. Although Arsenal won, Leah was not happy at all. She stormed off the field when the game ended. leaving everyone surprised by her actions. Everyone, including you, though that she would be celebrating the win and her first game back but no, she just stormed off to the changing room. Her teammates hadn't even come back to the changing room when Leah was already gone.
Leah was mad. She expected her first game back to go perfectly and when it didn't she just lost it. Although to you it seemed like she played well, she didn't think so herself. She couldn't control the ball the way she wanted, and it just didn't feel the same as before. She hated it. She hated the fact that she had been doing rehab for ages just to be worse than before.
You were waiting for her in the car. You saw how she had stormed off and realized that she would probably want to leave as quick as possible.
"What happened baby?" You asked when she hopped inside of the car. Leah didn't answer, she just started driving the usual way back to your apartment.
At home, you tried again. You tried to ask what had happened but she just wasn't having it. So that's how you ended up with her yelling at you. It was rare so it made you cry, you hated it when someone yelled at you.
"Oh for gods sake are you really crying?" Leah was amused.
Leah was never like this towards you and it hurt. Your usually so caring and loving girlfriend was now yelling horrible things to you. Of course you were crying.
"I'm just gonna go" You said with a barely hearble voice.
"Good, please feel free to just get your things and get the fuck away from me" She said and pushed you out of her way. You weren't prepared for it so it made you stumble to the floor.
You saw Leah's face immediately drop. Her angry features were now switched with guilt and concern. Leah never once in your relationship had never used any type of physical violence towards you. Even if this was just a push, it made you worried. Why was your once so loving girlfriend like this.
"Y/n I'm so, so sorry, I didn't-" Leah started but you didn't listen. You just got up from the floor and put your shoes on and with that you were out of the door.
You were crying even more now. You knew that this wasn't your girlfriend. This wasn't the girl you fell in love with. You wanted Leah Williamson back. The same girl who would wake you up with kisses and bring breakfast to bed. The girl who comforted you when you cried. You wanted that Leah back.
You decided to call your and Leah's friend Katie. You knew her the best from the team, since she was at your house every other day.
"Katie, I umm, can I come over" You mumbled to the phone.
Katie could hear that you were crying and left er apartment and came to pic you up. She knew that this was abut Leah. Everyone had seen the way she stormed off of the field and no one on the team were able to contact her ever since. So something must have happened at home.
At your own apartment Leah was quite literally punching the walls. She was angry at herself. How could she let stupid football game come between your relationship. How could she be so mean to you. She didn't even recognize herself from her actions and words. And the fact that she had pushed you.
She couldn't forgive herself for that. He precious girl, you were so innocent, just trying to help Leah but she had pushed you and you fell. You could've gotten hurt.
After a while Leah texted you with apologizes. She also wanted to make sure that you were somewhere safe. Your answer was simple. "I'm at Katie's, gonna need a few days to have some space"
You had explained Katie what happened and she was furious. She wasn't known for having a good temper so she was ready to fight. Although she had known Leah longer, you had quickly became an important part of her life. She wanted to just hold you close and protect you from the world. She didn't like the fact that your own girlfriend had hurt you. The girl who was supposed to protect you.
You stayed few days at Katie's place. It was comfortable and peaceful since Katie was often at training. You had your time to think about what happened. You didn't want to break up because of that but you weren't ready to forgive although Leah tried her best to make you forgive her. She sent flowers to Katie's apartment every day with love letters and apologizes. She wanted to give you the space that you had asked for but she also wanted to show that she cared and wanted to fix things.
'I know that some flowers won't undo what I did but I just wanted to apologize to my beautiful girl. I don't know what got into me but I hate myself for what I did. I never should have lashed out on you. I was just really upset that I couldn't play the way I wanted but I never should've taken it out on you that way. And it's not an excuse for my actions. I love you my sweetie and I hope that you can forgive me soon'
That was one of the letters that Leah had sent you and after four days at Katie's, you were ready to face Leah again. You asked for Katie to drop you off to your apartment. She didn't like how you were forgiving Leah so easily but it wasn't her business.
When you arrived back at your home, you were hesitant to go in. You didn't even know if Leah would be there, at least she didn't have practice. You opened the door with your key and walked inside. It smelled like Leah and it made you smile a little. You had missed your girlfriends scent. The apartment was cleaned, you knew that Leah had been stress cleaning.
"Leah?" You carefully asked.
Leah appeared from your bedroom. She was shocked to see you. She though that you hated her and would never want to see her again after what happened. But she was happy to be wrong. She took a few steps towards you, not wanting to startle you.
"Baby.." She just whispered.
"I am so sorry for what I did. I never should have yelled at you or pushed you. It was so wrong for me to do that and I don't have any excuse for myself. I shouldn't have done it and I regret it with every bode in my body" Leah started her apology but didn't get far before you crushed her in a hug. Leah was taken by a surprise but didn't mind.
"Never do that again and I will forgive you" You mumbled to her chest.
"I promise to you. I will never hurt you ever again my sweet girl" She answered sincerely.
"Mm Leah" You whispered against her lips.
"Let me show you how sorry I am. Let me make you feel good baby" Leah whispered back.
With that you were in the bedroom. Your clothes long forgotten on the floor.
"My sweet sweet girl" Leah mumbled while kissing down your body.
She wanted to make you feel good. She kept praising you and you enjoyed the sweet words.
"My y/n, you are so good to me" She said before diving to your wetness.
She ate you out happily. Every now and then, whispering sweet nothing to you. Lapping your juices and circling your clit. It was all you needed and more. Leah knew how to work your body just the right way. She teased your hole with her tongue before dipping it in which made you moan loudly.
"I'm so sorry sweet, I promise to be better girlfriend for you from now on" She said and then kept going. She was not in any rush, wanting to draw those beautiful moans from your mouth.
She kept praising you and eating you out. Happily drowning between your legs where she loved to be. And when your orgasm took over you, she made sure to keep going during that. All she wanted was to worship your body.
You finally had your Leah back.
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bangchansgirlsblog · 7 months
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another random idea.. Fem 9th member maknae reader who secretly smokes and gets caught by one of the boys who later snitches and tells chan. Reader and Chan fall out and she storms out of the dorms and ends up staying in her apartment instead to let off some steam. She realised how bad the smoking was for her health and how much it impacted her social life so she first to JYP and they send her to rehab + puts her on hiatus for two months because of rehab. Chan thinks it’s his fault for the hiatus as none of the members were told that she was going to rehab. They later find out and when Reader returns back from rehab/hiatus they all tell her how proud they are of her?
(sorry for the LONGGGG paragraph, i didn’t intend for it to be this long🧍‍♀️)
My biggest problem.
Okay maybe I got carried away a little and changed it a little but yeah forgive me 😜
Enjoy
-🩷
**
Y/n started smoking when she was 15.
She didn't know that she was eventually going to be a trainee the year after.
It was never part of her plan but when they scouted her when she was at the mall with her mum, it was a new chapter in her story and her mum begged for her to try it out. As her training days began and she tried to quit she found that she couldn’t go a day without smoking.
She was already addicted to it.
Her habit became stronger and stronger as the days got harder.
6 hours dance practice, 4 hours vocal and 2 hours media training. She found her self sneaking out for smokes during short breaks or before leaving the dorms for any type of schedule.
It sucked that she couldn't get out of it and it was affecting her.
At this point she didn’t even want to stop because if she did her body would fail.
**
1:45 pm, New York City.
"Alright people let's get started shall we?" The instructor walked onto the stage and stood at the edge waiting for everyone to get in place.
Y/n put her water bottle down and walked over to the group to get into her place so they could start practicing for the show that would happen the next day.
"Y/n and I.N I want more energy from the both of you please," Chan told the two maknae's. He was stood in the back analyzing everything to make sure it was on point.
The two nodded and stood ready to start. The sound of Charmer filled the whole stadium and their bodies started to move with the music. Their vocals being on point and their dancing being better than the last.
"What do you think?" The manager asked Chan. He was now stood down off stage looking at a different point of you. The rest of the band gasping for air.
"It was okay, I liked it but the lighting crew need to do better because I can barely see Felix in the back." He pointed and waved as he spoke. Trying to show the manager what he was imagining.
Y/n saw this as an opportunity to slip away for a bit for a short smoke break. She needed it. Her hands were shaking and her body couldn't really function due to the fuck she was going through withdrawals.
"Chan, may I use the washroom?" Her voice was timid but Chan was used to it and was able to hear her over his earpeaces.
"Yeah you can, five minutes yeah?" He replied. "Do you need one of the boys to come with you-"
"No no no it's fine," she replied fast, way to fast for Chan's liking.
"Okay," he squinted his eyes in suspicion but let it go.
She grabbed her bag and made her way through the different hallway. Making sure no one was in sight, she slipped through the backdoor to the back way alley.
It was quiet. No one was there and she was glad. She let go of the sign that lingered in her chest and pulled out the pack of cigs that laid neatly in her small pouch.
Her hands shook as she grabbed one cigarette and put it between her lips where she lit it and took a big puff.
Her body relaxed as the smoke filled her lungs. Her brain that was going hellfire was now calm and relaxed as well.
She thought she was safe when she reached for the second one. None of the boys had called her phone and it had been about 5 minutes.
"Just one more," she thought to herself.
"Y/n?" a voice called right by her ear causing her to jump and drop the pack of cigs.
"What are you doing?" She turned to look at Hyunjin who was visibly angry.
His eyebrows were furrowed and his lips were sealed tightly together.
"Hyunjin what are you doing here?" She asked as she got on her knees trying to collect the cigarettes that were now scattered all over.
"What do you mean what are you doing here? What are YOU doing here Y/n? And why are you smoking? Have you gone mad? Does Chan know about this?" He questioned standing there in shock.
"No,no Chan doesn't know about this and you're not telling him," Y/n hushed him trying to stop him from shouting and yelling.
"I think you've actually gone insane! Ofcourse I'm telling Chan,” he grabbed the cigarettes from Y/n's hand and threw them back to the ground where he stomped all over them.
"Inside. Now." He said through gritted teeth. Y/n was scared, it was visible. She grabbed her back and slowly made her way inside the venue. Her lips quivered.
"Hyunjin please don't tell Chan, please I'll do anything," she begged.
"I have to Y/n. I'm so disappointed in you. We trusted you and you do this?" His eyes couldn't meet hers. His body was tense as they walked backstage to the rooms in the back. The hallways gettin busier each second. The employees questioning why she was crying.
"Are you okay-"
"Yes she is please go along with your work," Hyunjin snapped at one of the ladies. Y/n looked up at him frightened because he was always nice to people, he never once raised his voice at an employee.
When they arrived in the room. The boys were sat on the couches or having lunch. Chan was texting on his phone when he looked up.
"Y/n? Why did you bathroom break take so long?" He laughed and looked at Hyunjin who wasn't smiling.
"I caught her smoking Chan, she reeks of cigarettes" her head fell and she looked at her new trainers that one of the companies had sent her for promotion. It looked so intriguing all of a sudden.
"You caught her what? Hyunjin your joking," Chan laughed, "please tell me your joking," he paused and looked at the serious Hyunjin.
"Tell him, tell him now." He slightly pushed her in front of him so they could be face to face.
"I-I can explain Chan,"
"No way Y/n please tell me you're joking," his voice became harsh. The boys all turned to Y/n. They were all shocked at this because she was the last person to ever do such a thing.
"What the fuck?" Changbin's voice sounded. "You've been smoking?"
"Only a little," her voice was small. Timid almost.
"Don't lie, please don't fucking lie right now Y/n." Chan says walking closer to the younger.
"Sit down, now." Leeknow says standing up and dropping his chopsticks.
"Your only 19, I get your all 'grown' BUT your still so young. You're an idol. An idol!" Chan's hand smashes against the table making her jump in her sit.
"Okay then if you think I'm an adult I should be able to smoke or drink or-"
"Are you out of your mind momo?" He snapped back at her, "Do you know what it does to you?"
"But Chan-"
"Quit Or I'll make you quit," was all Chan said before he stormed out the room leaving her with the boys who looked very disappointed.
"I get it, you don't have to look at me like I'm some monster," she wiped her tears with her sleeve to clean the tears that run down her cheeks.
"I just don't have words for you right now, your irresponsible, selfish and careless," Leeknow's words were harsh. So harsh that even Hyunjin cringed and felt bad.
"Then kick me out the band if it's such a big deal," was all she said before she got up and run out the room down the hallway past Chan who was standing by the doors while a manger tried to calm him down and out the stadium. It was cold and she had left all her stuff inside so she was forced to run down the busy streets of New York, freezing.
Chan following after her trying to figure out what was going on.
Her body was shaking from all the tears she cried.
But she continued to run.
She was able to disappear from Chan’s sight. Now Chan was really angry and worried. He'd lost his youngest in the busy streets of New York. She was new to the city and she was an idol. Anything could go wrong. Anything could go extremely wrong.
His heart was beating out of his chest. He grabbed his phone out of his picked rushing to call his manager then leeknow and the boys.
He found himself back in the changing rooms surrounded by everyone. Trying to calm him down.
"I'll go back to the hotel just in case she's back there," Felix assured Chan while he packed up his stuff.
"I'll come with you Lix," Hyunjin grabbed his bag aswell making sure to grab her stuff from the ground. He opened to make sure all her stuff was inside but the site wasn't pretty at all.
Underneath everything he saw 4 more packs of cigarettes causing him to gasp horrendously.
"What? What is it?" Bangchan's neck snapped to his direction. Hyunjin had no words so he just passed the bag to Chan who was now terrified.
"Is she addicted?" Was all he asked before handing the bag to leeknow who was curious aswell.
Chan's hands run through his hair as he was thinking of all the possible ways he could find her in the whole of New York City. He felt guilt. He felt like if he had maybe approached this in a nicer way they could have worked through it but now his anger was just blinding him.
"Okay, police were informed and we're about to go driving around to see if we can somehow spot her," their manager tells them (he was also panicking low key but he didn’t want them knowing) , "do you guys want to join?"
"I'll come with you," Leeknow says quickly.
His hands were shaking and he felt so much guilt aswell. If anything happened to Y/n it would be all his fault and he wouldn't forgive himself.
"Same Hyung," Han jumps in.
They all grabbed their bags and the three (Han, Leeknow and Chan) quickly rushed out right behind their manager.
The rest of the boys cleaned up and quickly left to go to the hotel hoping to find her there safe and sound.
It took 5 hours. 5 hours before Felix had decided to go to the cafe by the hotel to grab drinks for everyone and he had found her sat in a coffee shop, she was shivering and cold but Felix didn’t care because he was angry and Felix was never angry. Without hesitation, Felix dragged her out and back to the hotel even if she was kicking and screaming. He didn’t care. At all. He ignored her pleas and cries.
The lecture she got from Chan and all of them was hot and mean and ruthless but at the end of the day they gave her a choice to either quit or go to rehab but she chose to quit. She “promised” them.
After an hour of grilling her for answers she finally had admitted to everything that was going on and how she felt and how she was battling her own self.
Chan was beating himself up for not noticing and Leeknow was beating himself up for not being there for her.
She was so vulnerable. They all knew her secrets and her problems. She felt like a show everyone was just watching and waiting to break.
**
6:20, Japan
The first time the boys had noticed her odd behavior was starting up again, was when they had a sign meet and a concert right after. She hadn’t been able to go for a smoke in hours, her body was now trembling and she was sweating a lot. She could barely get through anything and nausea started to grow string in the pit of her stomach.
“Hey, you okay? You kinda look pale love,” Han was sat next to her getting his makeup done and so was she. He had notice she was fidgeting a lot in the chair. Her eyes were red too.
“Yeah just really tired,” she lied and gulped down thick saliva trying to get rid of the nausea but it completely failed.
“I think I’m going to be sick-“ she got up from the chair and run through the corridors to find the bathroom and once she did she through up, but it was good it was just mucus. Her head was thumping and her throat ached.
A hurried knock made her stand up and flush before she opened the door and collapsed in Han’s hands. He was worried for his younger and now he had to curry her to the rooms.
“Hey, stay with me okay? Don’t close your eyes,” he softly said while he blew air into her face to keep her cool.
When he had walked in and found leeknow sat on their changing room couch he let out a sigh of relief.
“Leeknow help me please! It’s Y/n,” he said panicked. Without hesitation leeknow stood up quickly and took her from Hans hands and put her on the couch to lay down.
Han had run down the corridor to get medics as leeknow woke her up from her faint state.
“Momo? Can you hear me? It’s leeknow,” a soft groan left her lips.
“Would you like some water?” She nodded her head and leeknow was on it. He got on one knee and started to feed her small sips of water.
“Tell me what hurts,” he softly said and played with her hair to calm her down.
“Everything,” she softly said and it aches Leeknow’s hurt.
Y/n knew the only way for her to get out of this state was to smoke but how?
“Leeknow, I- I need to use the bathroom,” she groaned and held her hand against her head.
“If you need to puke i’ll get you a bucket love,” he assured her. He didn’t want her waking and being left alone right now. He wouldn’t allow it.
“I need to pee,”
“Okay can you wait until the medics are here?” And right on cue the door opens and a frantic Han walks into the room with a few people behind him. Then Chan and Hyunjin walked in right behind.
��What happened Y/n?” Chan asked straight away and knelt beside her while he rubbed her hands.
“I don’t know Oppa, I was just not feeling the best,”
“You should have told me my love,” he softly said as he watched the medical team examine her.
“I thought it wasn’t this bad,”
“Now you see what it has done,” Hyunjin joint the conversation. “Look how tired you look, have you eaten anything all day?” He asked her.
“I had the lunch Changbin braught me,”
“So if we called Changbin right now he would agree?” Hyunjin furrowed his eyebrows and crossed his arms. Disappointed.
“No-“
“How bad is it?” Chan asked the man in uniform.
“Not bad, she’s just really dehydrated. We’ll fix an IV on her arm and she’ll be good to go, also may I speak to you outside in the corridor,” Leeknow looks at Chan worried and they exchanged the same expression before Chan head out with the guy.
“I need to pee really bad,” Y/n whines and complains.
“Okay you can go, I’ll come with you,” the lady medic says and slowly guides her to the bathroom. Y/n grabs her lighter and cig and started to smoke it. The feelings make her body slowly awaken and then gain energy. She smoked one more just incase and then washed her hands and made her way back to the last medic.
She was able to walk on her own but just to make it not look suspicious she held onto her and then finally she sat on the couch and got the iv in her arm.
Chan was back in the room and he was examining her. Trying to look for something and once it caught his eye he looked over at the rest of the boys nodding and they all just stare at eachother.
They knew. They knew she was smoking again and it hurt Chan for what was about to come was not going to be pretty.
**
10:55, south Korea
The paparazzi lights started to increase when She stood up in the podium. Her eyes were red and she had eyebags from the lack of sleep she was getting.
Her hands shook as she grabbed the microphone. The boys stood right behind her. Their head looking at the ground trying to avoid her shaking body.
"Goodmorning, my name is Y/n Y/l/n and I'm a member of strays kids. I didn't want this to happen. Trust me I didn't,"
She took a deep breath looking at the manager that were sat in the front raw. Judging her and giving her a disgusted look.
A sob Left her mouth and she put the microphone down. Trying to get herself together before she spoke again.
"To all the stays out there, I want to say I love you and I hope you guys can forgive me for this. I will be going on haitus for a while," the room is filled with gasps as the flashlights now increase even more.
"I pray that if I do come back I will be better and stronger for you guys and that I will make my group and team proud. Thank you for loving me and i hope to see you guys soon," she bowed before taking a step back and wiping her tears.
The boys all stood around her to hide her body from the camera. Han rubbing her back and whispering something in her ear.
She didn't care though, she was upset. She was so upset with herself but she still managed to blame the boys. Her reasoning? Because she felt like they were giving her up and sending her away.
**
"Alright, are you all packed?" Their manager stood outside her room.
"Yeah" she softly said rolling her bag out and handing it to the older man.
"Alright the boys are down stairs if you want to say bye, I'll be waiting in the car," he nodded and left her to close her room and head down the steps to her band mates.
They all looked upset, there was no lie there. There were all stood by the door giving her a sympathetic smile.
"I'm going to miss you," Chan steps up and pulls her into a hug. She didn't want it though. She shrugged it off and stood there looking at him with teary eyes.
"Chan please don't do this,"
"You know I want was best for you-"
"But Chan I'll change I promise just give me a chance,"
His eyes were soft and filled with tears. Guilt was eating him up. He so badly wanted not to send her away but he didn't have a choice.
"I'm sorry," the sound of a honk interrupts them and she knew it was time for her to go.
“I hate you,” she sobbed. That was the last thing she said to him and without looking back she left the dorms. Hoping that somehow she would make it out alive.
Breaking news, strays kids maknae Y/N Y/N/L and group manager in have been left in critical condition after a fatal car crash. Was it a set up?
**
I’m not doing a part two🙈
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