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beomgyucoded · 6 months

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Lyrically Bound

Pairing: Rockstar!Beomgyu x Lyricist!Reader

Word Count: 17.3k

Genre: sort of strangers to lovers, soulmate au

Warnings: reality Beomgyu, cursing, underaged drinking, mentions and descriptions of kissing, allusions to sex (no actual smut), use of pet names (Beomgyu calls reader princess), reader is a little judgmental of Beomgyu at first

Summary: in this world, soulmates are a rarity. There’s only a handful of people that have a connection so strong, that they share a fate. Your parents were one of the few, and you could only hope you were too. By high school you gave up most of your hope, however the second you get to Seoul for college you’re met with an ache in your chest and movie like dreams that leave you feeling warm.

Soulmates were so rare in this world that most people didn’t believe they existed. No one tried to discover if they shared a connection meant to last a lifetime because of the infinitesimal chance. Instead, they would listen to stories that felt more like fairy tales- so out of reach- and then express their desire for such a tie to another soul. You were no stranger to these stories. You were often the storyteller, as your parents were one of the few.

Your parents met in high school. Your dad from Seoul and your mom from Jeju. Your mom had begged to go to a performing arts high school in Seoul, which happened to be the one your dad went to. Your mom said she’d never forget how she felt on her first day. There was this indescribable feeling the second she stepped foot into the school. She blamed it on first-day nervousness, but when the feeling continued to grow and a small mark in the shape of a guitar appeared right under her collarbone, she almost passed out. It was a big school, and it wasn't until the school’s winter festival that they encountered each other. When their eyes met, everything fell into place. While your mom knew that it was because they were soulmates, your dad believed it was love at first sight. Your mom, being as bold as she was, walked right up to him and asked “Do you believe in soulmates?” and showed him her guitar mark.

It is also believed that the child of soul mates is more likely to have a soulmate of their own. At least you hoped. Despite how long it’s been, you’ve watched as your parents fall more in love with each other every day. And you only wish to have that kind of connection with another person, too. Since soul links weren’t as obvious and were different for everyone, it was even more difficult to determine whether you had a soulmate or not. Throughout school, whenever you felt the tiniest bit for someone, you’d hold on to it thinking it could be something. It never was.

“It’ll feel stronger than that.” Your mom always told you.

She described it as “all your feelings hitting you at once,” and “there will be this feeling of familiarity when you’re near each other.”

Hearing that made your longing for a soulmate even stronger. When you got to high school, you were sure signs of a soul link would show up like how it did for your parents. But when that didn’t happen, you decided to let go of the idea altogether.

Aside from being known as the “child of soulmates”, you were also a musical genius (as your dad liked to put it). You possessed a lot of natural talent, especially in songwriting, since you were a child. This wasn’t surprising, considering both your parents were musicians in school.

“You have such a way with words,” something you’ve been told since grade school.

And because of this, music and writing revolve around you like the moon revolves around the earth. You had quite the voice too, your mom giving you voice lessons since you were three. Something strange, however, was the moment you picked up a guitar in your middle school band class, you could play it almost perfectly. The strange part being that you were never taught how to play the guitar before. The only explanation you could think of at the time was that your dad played guitar, and the soulmate bond between your parents was stronger than you believed. So strong that even their child could inherit what brought them together. You didn’t think too much of it, instead using the skill to help in your songwriting.

That is how you ended up where you are currently, a resident singer/songwriter who everyone thinks is special, mostly because of her parents being soulmates. It seemed college admission officers thought so too, because at the moment you were packing up your things to go off to college. You were admitted to a college with one of the best music departments in the world, and on a full scholarship. Your parents encouraged you tremendously when making the decision. They said your talent shouldn’t go to waste and that they never had the courage to pursue music like you do.

“Are you completely sure I should go to Seoul?”

You asked one more time, watching as your parents happily helped you pack your things.

“Why wouldn’t we be sure, dear? Music is what you want to do, right? I hope it doesn’t seem like we’re forcing you or that we just want you out of the house.” Your mom said and hurriedly added that last part.

You giggled softly at her rushed sentences and continued to watch them.

“I know you aren't, and I promise this is what I want to do. I’m just making sure you aren’t having second thoughts about sending your only child off.” You joked lightly, reassuring her.

Truthfully, you were the one having second thoughts. You've always been rather independent, but both your parents always gave you unconditional support in any of your endeavors. You never felt alone or had to actually be all alone. Until now. Now, you were moving to the city all by yourself and would be in a new environment where no one knew you or of you. That was terrifying.

“Maybe you’ll meet your soulmate in college.” Your dad’s voice brings you out of your thoughts before they can turn dark.

“I don’t have a soulmate, Dad.” You mumbled softly.

“You don’t know that for sure. Some people go their whole life without meeting theirs because they refuse to look.”

“They refuse because there’s a less than 3 percent chance that they would even have one. And I did look.”

Your dad only shook his head and chuckled at you.

“I didn’t think you were one to lose hope. What happened to the little princess who only wanted to meet her prince and get married?”

“She faced reality,” you said bluntly.

“I’m sorry, that didn’t come out the way I wanted. But seriously, I’m not getting married.”

“You say that now, but when you meet him, I'm sure the first thing you’ll want to do is put a ring on it.”

Shaking your head amused, you returned to your thoughts. To be honest, you never gave up hope. To most people, you had everything a child could want, yet you always felt like something was missing. From your life and you as a person. Your parents met in high school, and it was silly of you to believe that you would meet your soulmate in high school, too. No story is the same. You, of all people, should know that.

“You’re right, I’m not one to give up. I haven’t. Even if I don’t have a soulmate, maybe I’ll meet someone there anyway.” You said, trying your hardest to be optimistic. Soulmates aren’t everything. You seemed to have forgotten that.

“You’ve dated other people before, so maybe you will. Keep your head up, sweetheart. Let’s finish packing your things.” Your mom said warmly.

The next day, you woke up early. You couldn’t sleep, mostly because you were leaving for Seoul today and because of your conversation about potentially meeting someone at college. Your dad’s words echoed in your head as you were trying to sleep, his words slowly morphed into fantasies that you played out in your head all night. Sitting up in your bed, you looked around your mostly empty room and sighed. You picked up your phone and saw that it was just past 4 a.m. Groaning, you pushed the covers off and got up, knowing you wouldn’t be able to go back to sleep.

After getting ready for the day, you decided to just walk around your house. Looking into every room, all the picture frames and decor, capturing mental images and saving them in your head as you wouldn’t be back here for a long time. Your things were already packed away in your car, just waiting for you to drive away. Your parents will be accompanying you, only because they want to be the ones to show you all around the apartment they got for you. They thought you’d have a better experience in Seoul if you lived in an apartment rather than on campus. You didn’t realize how long you've been standing and staring at the pictures on the wall until the creak of the stairs brought you back to the present.

“You're awake early.” Your dad stated amused.

“Yeah, I couldn’t sleep.” You said sleepily, a small yawn escaping after.

Your mom laughed softly, and went to the kitchen, bringing back a tall glass of orange juice.

“Here, sweetie,” she said and handed it to you.

You downed it quickly (quicker than you should have), then turned to find your parents interacting cutely. Your dad was on one knee, tying the laces of your mom’s shoes for her while she looked at him lovingly. You smiled at the interaction, just admiring them. They were endearingly perfect for each other, and you were glad to witness their expressions of affection.

“Ready?” Your dad asked animatedly.

“How are you so awake every day?” You asked, failing to understand how they were able to sleep and actually have energy after waking up.

To this your mom answered, 'It's a soulmate thing,” and that was all the explanation you needed. You put on your shoes and let out a huff.

“Okay, let’s do this.”

You took one more glance around the inside of your childhood home and then left, locking the front door behind you and meeting your parents in the driveway. You got into the backseat of your car, your dad insisting on driving, and your mom in the passenger seat. The drive was four hours long but felt like an eternity due to the anticipation. The closer you got to Seoul, the more you felt the nervousness bubble in the pit of your stomach. You rotated between looking out the window, fiddling with the hem of your shirt, twirling strands of your hair around your finger, and replying to texts from your friends asking how excited you must be. You tried replying wholeheartedly, but you were a mixture of excited, nervous, and scared– excited making up the smallest part of the ratio. After what felt like an endless journey, your dad stopped the car in front of a very luxurious-looking apartment building. Your eyes widened, mouth hanging open unintentionally as you looked out the window.

“Are you sure this is the right building?” You asked in both awe and shock as you stepped out of the car and craned your head upwards.

They could only laugh at your response and actions.

“It sure is.” Your mom replied, looking over at your dad and shooting him a proud look.

“Come on, we’ll bring your stuff up a little later.” Your dad said and ushered you forward, taking your mom’s hand as the three of you walked into the building.

Your eyes darted everywhere around the lobby, staying silent as you were at a loss for words. Your parents motioned for you to press the button for the elevator, and you did just that.

“Press 12.” Your mom said excitedly.

Your eyes widened for the umpteenth time since arriving in Seoul, and you shakily pressed the button for the twelfth and highest floor. The elevator ride, unlike the car ride, was both smooth and faster than you were ready for. You followed them out of the elevator and they led you to the last door at the end of the hallway.

“Would you like to do the honors?” Your dad asked you and held up a set of keys.

You nodded and took the set of keys, fumbling them in your hands before finally unlocking the door to your new home for the next four years. You took small steps inside and gasped.

“This... is mine?” You asked, eyes still wide and full of doubt as you turned around to ask.

“All yours sweetie.” Your mom confirmed and smiled lovingly.

You took a look around the one-bedroom apartment, that was definitely too large for an 18-year-old. It had everything you could need, topped with a beautiful view of the city, and was within walking distance from your college campus. It all seemed too good to be true, too good to be all yours. You looked around cautiously, not daring to touch anything, barely even grasping the door knobs to see into each room. You came back to the lounge area and disbelief was written all over your face.

“This is really for me?” You asked in a soft voice.

They smiled at each other and your dad nodded at you.

“It’s the very least you deserve since you earned a full scholarship. We wanted to get you a beautiful place with the money we put away for your college fund. Maybe you’ll continue to stay here after you graduate.” He said proudly.

Proud of you and all your accomplishments and proud of himself and your mom for finding such a perfect place for you.

“I love it so much, how can I ever thank you?” You said, eyes now glossed over as you hugged both of your parents.

“You don’t have to sweetie, just continue to do what you do and be happy. That’s all we could ask of you, for you to be happy.” Your mom said, and that almost made your pool of emotions overflow, but you held it in.

They helped you bring your things from your car and they left soon after that, wanting to reminisce around the city they met in. It was Monday, and classes didn’t start until two weeks from now. The plan was to take the rest of this week to settle into your apartment, take next week to familiarize yourself with the city and take the week before classes started to explore your campus.

However, things never go according to plan. By your third day here, you found yourself both bored and somewhat uneasy. The uneasiness had been present since you arrived, and you hoped it would settle by now. It did settle, by making home in the pit of your stomach with no intentions of easing up. It made you so restless that you were able to unpack most, if not all, of your things and even got your music room set up. That only took you two days, and now on the third day, you were sitting in the music room with your guitar just staring out the window.

“Maybe I should go out today…” You thought to yourself, putting your guitar down and getting up.

You’d been living off whatever you and your mom brought from home and put in the fridge and the pantry. You decided to go out and look for the nearest convenience store or grocery store, and maybe take some time to wander around the area too. Stepping outside of your apartment building for the first time in three days, you typed “convenience store near me” into your phone and set off in whichever direction felt right.

After walking for a few minutes, you finally looked up and realized you had absolutely no idea where you wandered off to. Your phone is not being any help either, so you typed in the address of your apartment building and decided to start again. Luckily you didn’t wander off as far as you thought and when you got back to the only familiar building, you chose your steps carefully this time. That didn’t make a difference, because after a few minutes, you still found yourself lost.

“Are you lost?” a voice asked from next to you.

“Is it that obvious?” you asked and giggled softly, looking up from your phone to meet the eyes of a boy who looked around your age.

He was much taller than you, bleach blonde hair that had grown out a little and he had a very sweet look to him.

“A little bit, yeah,” he replied with a slight laugh, “did you just move here?” he asked.

“Yeah, I did, like three days ago. I’m originally from a little town in Ulsan.”

“Oh wow, that’s far. What made you move to Seoul?”

“I’m here for college.”

“Wait, are you going to Seoul National University?”

“Yes I am, do you go there?”

“I will be. Some friends of mine and I are all starting there in two weeks.”

“Guess I’ll see you around there too”

“I’m Kai”

“(Y/N)”

“Well (y/n), where were you trying to go? I’d love to help.”

“I’m trying to look for the closest convenience store.”

“Oh! There’s one super close to campus if you don’t mind walking there.”

“I don't mind at all, I was going to check out the campus eventually anyways.”

“Alright then, follow me.”

You followed Kai as he walked to the convenience store he was talking about and you were grateful to find someone nice enough to help you.

“So, what are you planning on majoring in?”

“Music composition.”

“My friends and I will also be in the music department. We’re in a band together.”

“Really? That’s so cool.”

“Yeah, we’ve been a band since high school and got enough recognition to get signed under a label.”

“Wow, that’s amazing. I’m a songwriter or lyricist if you will.”

“Oh, that’s really cool too. Do you play any instruments or do you just write?”

“I play the guitar.”

“I play the drums, our lead singer plays the guitar. Maybe you guys will get along well. And here we are, one convenience store.” He said and made a grand gesture causing you to laugh.

“Thank you so much, I hope this wasn’t out of your way or anything.”

“Oh no worries, I was on my way back to campus. I should get back and help them move our stuff into the dorms. It was nice meeting you (y/n), see you around.”

“It was nice meeting you too Kai, thank you again.”

He waved at you and walked off in the direction the campus was in and you let out a sigh. The uneasiness in your stomach moved up to your chest while walking over here. Was Kai your soulmate? You thought to yourself and then remembered your mom’s words. There was no feeling of familiarity when you met Kai, and nothing… clicked. Letting out a huff, you shook the thoughts out of your head and went into the convenience store.

Meanwhile, Kai was greeted with the sounds of frustrating groans and then the sound of something heavy being dropped.

“What took you so long?” Beomgyu asked, panting slightly.

“Sorry, I ran into this girl and she was lost so I helped her.”

“Was she hot?”

“Is that seriously all that matters to you, Beomgyu?” Taehyun chimed in from his place on the floor.

“Well if she was, I’ll let his lateness go.”

“Fine, yes, she was pretty,” Kai replied truthfully.

“Okay, now please help Tae and me before one of us ends up killing the other,” Beomgyu said and pushed the hair out his face, bringing a hand to his chest.

He wasn’t sure if it was because he’s been lugging boxes for the past thirty minutes or what, but his chest was hurting. Shaking it off, he clapped his hands together and picked up a lighter box, watching as Kai and Taehyun struggled to carry the big heavy box in front of him.

You scanned the aisles of the convenience store, pleased with what you were seeing and picking up a few things. As you were checking out, a bright, colorful flyer caught your eye. It was from Big Dreams Music and it was a contest. Specifically, a songwriting contest, your forte. Taking a picture of the flyer, you put your phone back into your pocket and took the bag full of snacks, making your way back to your apartment.

After putting your goodies away, you sat on the couch, pulling out your phone to read over the flyer you took a picture of. It was a songwriting competition for a band called Lethal Division. Their label wanted to change up their sound and was accepting entries. The band's name caused your heart to race out of nowhere. It was familiar to you, you’ve heard girls talk about them in high school, especially the lead singer. But that’s all you can recall when it comes to their image, you didn’t even know their names or anything. You’ve heard their music before, and you remember them being great in the beginning before they gained popularity. Now their music just sounded like noise and you’ve lost interest. You thought it was sad when music didn’t speak. You were always praised for your songs and how they moved people, so maybe you’d be able to help them move people too. You locked your phone, a slight frown on your face as you thought about what you should write.

“I’ll sleep on it. And I should probably look them up tomorrow to get a better idea of what would suit them.” You said to yourself and decided to turn in for the night, hoping this ache in your chest would let you sleep for once.

Waking up the next morning, you felt different, to say the least. You felt warm from the inside. It was a comforting warmth. Better than the ache you’ve been feeling. The more you regained consciousness, the more you remembered the dream you had last night and you gasped. Sprinting out of bed, you hurriedly found an empty page in your songbook and started to write.

Beomgyu woke up the next morning, his mind fuzzy. It felt as if he wasn’t here last night, but he knew that he was. The ache was gone from his chest, instead replaced by a comforting warmth, and he felt a small burning sensation on his arm. Looking, he saw a mark in the shape of a pen. The mark was small, barely noticeable and he wondered if one of the guys drew on him or he got a tattoo he just couldn’t remember.

“Am I still dreaming? Why does this burn?” He thought to himself, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes.

Getting up, he tried not to trip over the many boxes littered around the room. They managed to bring all their stuff into their dorm but didn’t unpack any of it. All that was set up was his guitar stand for his precious guitar. He learned to play the guitar when he was in middle school, his dad taught him and it became his favorite pastime since he learned. So much so that he played guitar in his high school band. The other members of the band convinced him to perform at the end-of-year festival solo, and that was when he and the rest of the school discovered he had a voice. He never had singing lessons before, only really humming to himself from time to time. But his voice was beautiful, it was smooth and deep– and soothing, and people wanted to hear more. It was from there that his friends and him decided to start a band of their own, him being the lead singer and lead guitarist. They became fairly popular in school and their song covers are what led to Big Dreams Music discovering them and eventually signing them. It all felt like a whirlwind, but he didn’t mind it. This was his dream, after all, to be able to play guitar on stage. By their third year of high school, they had an ep out, songs fully written by them, and their popularity skyrocketed all around Seoul, even to other parts of the country.

His ego also skyrocketed. They became known as the rockstars of their school, and he took advantage of his status sometimes. Their newfound fame eventually became more important than their music, their songs going from their heartfelt words to whatever the label thought would sell for them. None of them seemed to mind, knowing their newer fans were more there for their looks and just one chance for a night with a rockstar. Some fans got that chance, the old “band members taking a lucky fan backstage” idea intrigued them, so after a show, that’s what they did and it became an infamous tradition.

“We’re teenage boys.” Taehyun would always say and shrug it off. He was right, they were teenage boys– good-looking, talented teenage boys who had needs.

Their last show was their high school graduation party, and they couldn’t carry out their little tradition then. Instead, they had to pack up for college. Seoul National University offered him and his friends admission to their music department, and although he thought college wasn’t too necessary, he couldn’t refuse the offer. Their music department was the best in the world, and getting to meet college girls wasn’t too bad of a perk either.

Since classes haven’t started yet, he has yet to meet any college girls. Instead, the guys and him would go out and enjoy Seoul’s nightlife. He knew he was attractive, it was undeniable, and being a rockstar only made it that much easier to get anyone he wanted. However, it was nothing more than that, he never thought he wanted anything more. At least that's how it appeared to everyone on the outside, on the inside– he felt incomplete, and despite living his dream, there was still something missing. He heard the stories about soulmates here and there, not believing in them though. He thought it was too good to be true, the notion that there was someone out there just for him.

When he was younger, he looked it up out of curiosity. And after seeing that there was practically no chance of him having one because of the rarity, he tossed any hope he had out the window. Though part of him thinks there’s still a chance, cause he still hasn’t had a steady relationship. His “love life” consists of many baseless hookups, both him and whoever he was with for the night wanting only one thing from each other. This had been working for him, he was overall satisfied and his needs were being met, until recently. A few days ago there had been this uneasy feeling building in his chest, and it had been prominent until now. Now, it was gone and replaced by an internal warm and fuzzy feeling. He didn’t know how to explain it to Kai and Taehyun without sounding insane, now he didn’t have to. His thoughts were interrupted by a loud knock on the door.

“Gyu, are you up?” Taehyun called from the other side.

He opened the door to reveal a slightly disheveled Taehyun, bright eyes wider than usual.

“Yeah, I was just about to get ready for the day, what’s up? Why do you look like you've seen a ghost?”

“The label called.”

His eyes now widened to match Taehyun’s and he felt his hands start to clam up.

“What did they say…?” He hesitantly asked.

“They need all three of us to come in right now.”

He sighed and ran a hand through his hair multiple times.

“Is Hyuka awake?”

“Yeah, he was the one who got the call.”

“Alright, let’s see what they want.”

They got ready quickly and waited for the car to take them to their label’s building. Beomgyu was anxious– no he was scared. Every time they got a call from the label out of nowhere, he was always scared of suddenly being dropped. They all shared this fear, they worked hard for their fame and although their band isn't what it used to be, it was still their dream. A dream they didn't want to wake up from yet. The company car dropped them off in front of the building and they went to their usual meeting room. Everyone was already there waiting for them.

“We’re holding a contest.” Their manager announced.

The three of them let go of the breath they've been holding in, it coming out as a collective sigh of relief. The looks of nervousness were quickly replaced by confusion.

“A contest for what?” Kai was the one to speak up.

“A contest to find your new sound. According to data we've been compiling, your music is no longer selling well and we think a completely new songwriter will help.”

Beomgyu sat up fully now, intrigued by their producer’s words and he crossed his arms.

“And why can’t we go back to writing our own songs?”

“Because I'm not sure you guys know how to do that anymore.”

Their producer’s words felt like a slap to the face. Beomgyu knew he was right, what could he possibly write about now that had any substance? Fame? Money? Sex? That was all people wrote about now and he didn’t show it anymore, but he wanted their band to be different. After that little meeting, the flyers that were put up about the contest became more evident to him. They were there for god knows how long, but he’s only seeing them now.

“How caught up in myself am I?” He thought to himself, resting his head on the window of the car as it drove them back to their dorm.

You had been writing for hours, eventually moving to your music room, guitar on standby to play any melody that came to mind. The dream last night was unlike anything you've ever experienced. It felt like you were watching a movie, except you were able to feel and experience everything the main character was. It wasn’t entirely clear, but whoever the dream was about had such complex thoughts and a beautiful outlook on life, yet it was clear (at least to you) that they were holding something back. Before moving to your music room, you called your parents to tell them what you've been experiencing and about the dream. Your mom confirmed that what you had last night was a soulmate dream, and from now on until you meet him, this is how you will be learning about him. This was more than exciting news, you had a soulmate, he was close by, and just from the first dream, you already knew he was everything you've been missing.

A little more than a week had passed, a new dream every night and you were certain that your soulmate was perfect in every way. Every morning when you woke up, you woke up with that warm, comforting feeling. It went away after some time during the day, replaced by the same ache from before, but always came back when you woke up from a dream.

You finished writing the song and even wrote a few more, all either about him or inspired by him. The deadline for the contest was today, so right now you’re filling out the submission form. Chewing on your bottom lip, you flipped through the pages of your songbook, trying to decide which one to send in. You decided to go with the one you started writing after having the first dream. It had a theme of meeting for the first time, the song sending a message saying “I’ve been waiting for you” or "Where have you been?” Your hands were shaking while uploading the lyrics and the melody you wrote, the last thing left to be filled out was the name the submission would be under.

You had a distinct writing style, and you were always proud of your work, but that was in your small town in Ulsan. This was for a big record label in Seoul. Your thoughts started to eat away at you, fingers hovering over the delete key more than any other one on the keyboard. Taking a deep breath, you closed your eyes tightly. You didn’t want to have any regrets so, without a second thought, you quickly opened your eyes, typed “Lyric” into the name box, and hit send.

Classes started soon after that, the contest now fading to the back of your mind. You continued to have soulmate dreams, and whoever he was continued to inspire you. You were certain he was beautiful, both inside and out, but you didn’t want to get your hopes up. You tried to keep your thoughts chained to what you knew. Which was that he was nearby and he shared your love for music. You shared many other things too, from what you’ve learned in the dreams, and it only made you want to meet him as soon as you could. However you couldn’t actively pursue him, it needed to happen naturally. Of all the stories you heard, when the soul link became evident, both parties would feel a pull to the other. Not a physical pull of course, but something in your mind and your heart that says that you need to go and talk to that person. With the start of classes, you didn’t know if you’ve felt that pull to anyone. Mostly because all of your attention has been thrown into your studies.

You hadn’t seen Kai since you first met him, even though he said his friends and him were also attending this college and were also in the music department. Being in the music department didn’t mean he was also in the same major or that you’d share any classes though. Aside from that, much to your surprise, some of your professors have heard of you. They knew all about the music prodigy from Ulsan, who was raised by a rare couple of soulmates. And because of this, they decided to try and make your life here a living hell. They weren’t convinced that it all came naturally to you and that you would crumble under pressure. You were determined to prove them wrong though, and you have been, even catching some of them off guard by how quickly and skillfully you were able to submit their assignments. You felt like you’ve been swept up in a storm, and it didn’t seem like it would be easing up any time soon. Any free time you had, you spent writing. Either lyrics that come to mind or anything you can remember from your dreams.

The semester carried on like this and it felt like you were the only one being swamped with work. You were beyond stressed out, not expecting college to be like this. Everyone else around you seemed to have free time for dating or parties or anything else, as you’d hear them talk about plans all the time. You’d hear mentions of that band too, mostly about the release of their next single.

“It’s been so long since we’ve gotten new music from them” you heard one girl say.

“I know right, and I heard it’s supposed to be better this time.”

“Yeah! They got a new songwriter or something.”

“Even if it isn’t good, they’re all still hot.”

“Yeah, and new music means concerts. And you know what concerts mean”

“And since they go here, we’ve got an even better chance”

You started to tune out at this point in their conversation, realization taking over your features.

“Kai said he was in a band and that they go here.” You recalled.

“Apparently Lethal Division goes here and they have a new songwriter..” You started to connect the dots.

“The contest.” You froze and finally concluded that Kai’s band is that band and the contest was to change up their new sound.

Quickly, you pull out your laptop to check your email, you scrolled through hundreds of emails to see if the record label got back to you. Finally, you came across it. You won. Or well, Lyric did. And the new single they were coming back with, was going to be one written by you. You read through the email as thoroughly as you could and you still couldn’t believe what you were reading. You received the email almost a month ago, and they probably thought you ignored them. Sighing, you packed up your stuff and left the lecture hall, going to the practice room you reserved. Your stress suddenly increased, an even heavier weight crushing your shoulders as you walked. You weren’t one to be forgetful, not like this, but judging from the fact that they were still using your song, you guess the email was just to inform you.

You got to the building the practice rooms were in and trudged to room 0121, the one you reserved. However, instead of being met with an empty practice room, you were met with the door locked shut, the sound of instruments and loud laughter on the other side. Dropping your head, you closed your eyes and tried to center yourself. The ache in your chest intensified all of a sudden and you took that as a sign to go home. You also didn’t have the energy to argue with whoever was in there. Opening your eyes, you took one last look at the locked door and left.

Beomgyu didn't think college would go by this smoothly. He thought a school with such a renowned music program would be more difficult, but it’s been the opposite. Maybe it was the fact that he was rockstar Choi Beomgyu, but he found his classes to be a breeze. All the free time his bandmates and he had, was spent either partying or rehearsing for their comeback. The contest was a better idea than he realized. He wasn't going to give their label too much credit though. Their producer and them went through all the entries together on the days they didn't have class and the winning entry was nothing short of incredible. It was by someone who, fittingly, went by "Lyric”. It felt like the song was written just for him, the lyrics struck a feeling in everyone's heart as they listened to the demo. The sound was just what they needed, and he couldn't wait to perform it on stage.

Beomgyu spent the next few days practicing the lyrics to Lyric's song, trying to perfect every cadence and melody. He found himself humming it in the shower and even while he was trying to sleep. The more he practiced, the more he fell in love with it. It spoke to him in a way no other song had before. One thing that never changed about Beomgyu, was that he loved being on stage more than anyone else. He felt like how he did when they first formed the band and he hasn’t felt this eager about their music in a long time. His band members could tell how much the song meant to him and they loved seeing him like this, it made them excited to perform as well.

Beomgyu’s only class for the day went by slowly, he didn’t want to be there, and staring at the clock only seemed to make time pass slower. When the professor dismissed them, he was the first out of the room, immediately making his way to the building where the practice rooms were. He got stopped along the way by a few girls, which he of course had to entertain for a bit. The school gave Beomgyu and his bandmates the privilege of rehearsing whenever they wanted without having to reserve a room, so when he got there, he went to the first empty room he could find. Taehyun didn’t have classes today, so he would be bringing Beomgyu’s guitar and there was already a keyboard and drums in the room. Kai’s class would end soon and then they would practice the setlist for their upcoming show.

Beomgyu sat down on the floor in front of the keyboard, waiting impatiently for Taehyun to arrive with his guitar. He couldn't wait to start rehearsing. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, envisioning himself on stage, the crowd cheering loudly as he performed their new hit single. Suddenly, the door creaked open and he opened his eyes to see Taehyun walking in with his guitar case.

"Finally, you're here," Beomgyu said, grinning.

"Sorry, I got held up," Taehyun replied, setting down Beomgyu's guitar and taking his place in front of the keyboard.

"But now that I'm here, let's get started."

Kai walked in a few minutes later, panting slightly from having to rush to get here.

"I made it," he said with a smile as he sat down at the drumset.

They started with their new single, and Beomgyu's voice filled the room as he sang the first verse. They played through their setlist multiple times, perfecting each song until it was flawless. As they played, Beomgyu couldn't help but get lost in the music, feeling every emotion conveyed by his guitar. It was cathartic, playing music with his best friends by his side.

After a few hours of practice, they decided to take a break and grab some food from the vending machines down the hall. They sat on the floor of the practice room, munching on chips and drinking soda as they talked about their upcoming show.

"I can't wait to see the look on our fans' faces when we start playing," Taehyun said excitedly.

Kai nodded in agreement. "It's gonna be fucking amazing."

Beomgyu felt a sudden surge of adrenaline at the thought of performing for their fans. He knew that they had been waiting eagerly for this concert, and he wanted to make sure that it was the best show they had ever put on. He glanced around at Taehyun and Kai and knew that they felt the same way. As they finished their snacks, Beomgyu stood up and stretched his arms above his head.

"Let's get back to it," he said, his voice filled with determination.

They made their way back to their instruments and started playing once again. This time, they focused on fine-tuning their performance, working on every little detail until it was perfect. Beomgyu felt like he was in a trance, lost in the music. Rehearsing soon turned into them fooling around, playing random chords, and laughing. As they played, he couldn't help but feel a sense of heat building up inside him. That ache from before suddenly intensified in his chest and he had to stop.

“You okay man?” Kai asked concerned, standing up from his place at the drums and looking at Taehyun.

“We should call it for today,” Taehyun spoke up hesitantly.

Beomgyu didn’t want to, but the ache was taking a lot out of him. He put a hand over his chest and sighed.

"Yeah, I think that's a good idea," Beomgyu said, his voice small.

He couldn't shake the feeling that something was wrong.

"Was I getting sick?" He thought to himself.

The sound of the door trying to be opened caught his attention and all three of them turned to the door. A few seconds later, the ache settled down, back to how it was before. He got used to the feeling in the pit of his stomach, except for now, when it spiked like this. He put his guitar back in its case and slung it over his shoulder, the three of them going back to their dorm.

The moment you got back to your apartment, you sat on your bed and just stared out the window. A lot happened just now, and you were overwhelmed, to say the least. You found out that you won the contest, and the label was practically relying on your song to bring the band back to where they used to be music-wise. You also realized that Kai was in that band and they went to school with you. And lastly, whoever was in that room had to be your soulmate. The closer you got to the practice room, the more your chest ached, and when you were in front of the door, it pained you more than it ever had before. All you wanted was to relieve your stress by writing, however, that wasn’t going to happen now. Yes, you had your music room in your apartment, but you always wrote there. You wanted a change of scenery, and whoever was behind the locked door clearly didn’t know what reserved meant.

When Beomgyu got back to his dorm, he immediately went to his room. He didn’t understand what was going on with him. Every morning he woke up feeling warm, and as if he just got back from somewhere. Then, the mark on his arm. He asked Taehyun and Kai if any of them drew it on him, and they couldn’t even see it. Instead, they asked if he had some kind of sixth sense where he could see things they couldn’t, while laughing at him. It was there though. He saw it clearly. The small mark in the shape of a pen. Lastly, the ache. He’s been feeling it since they moved into the dorm on campus. It’s been bearable, settling in his stomach and it never bothered him much. Not until today. Today it felt like someone was squeezing his heart and it hurt. He couldn’t be getting sick, it would ruin everything right now. And if he wasn’t getting sick, he didn’t know how else to explain what was happening to him.

You thought the dreams would stop since you were so close to your soulmate yesterday. They haven’t, you continued to have them but they were a little different now. They seemed more current, you were learning about how he was feeling and things he was thinking about now. Before, you learned about what he was like, things he experienced that made him who he is, like an introduction. All of it was fuzzy, but you remembered what you needed to. Last night’s dream made you wake up feeling worried, even with the warm feeling present. The dream allowed you to learn that your soulmate was distressed, almost upset about something. It was strange to you, how you don’t know this person but you do. How you care about someone you haven’t even properly met, and how you were able to understand him completely. Whoever he was.

You sighed and got up. It was Saturday today, and it was your first completely free day in a while. The band’s concert is next week, where they will debut your song as their new single. You were avoiding anything about it like the plague, you weren’t going to go to the concert either. No one else has ever performed your songs before, and the thought of that made embarrassment wash over you. Despite it being your free day, you couldn’t shake what you learned in your dream. Pulling out your songbook, you started to write.

It was Saturday today, and even though Beomgyu was out late last night, he woke up bright and early. He thought partying would distract him from thinking about everything, and it did, but only for a short while. The girl he was with last night didn’t help much either. For once he felt unsatisfied, he needed more. More of what? That, he didn’t know. Maybe it was his nerves because the concert was coming up and they were trying a new sound. He woke up feeling warm again, the feeling now something he’s gotten used to. He thought it was nice, to wake up feeling warm and comfortable. He wished it would last longer than it did, fading not too long after he woke up.

Beomgyu got out of bed and stretched, feeling a sudden pang of self-doubt. He knew it was the concert looming over him, it had to be, and the fear of not being able to deliver something new and exciting to his fans. The pressure was weighing heavily on him, but he couldn't let it show. He had to keep up the facade that he was confident and in control.

He made his way to the kitchen to make himself some breakfast, but his mind was elsewhere. He couldn't shake off the feeling of dissatisfaction and longing. He needed something to distract himself, something to take his mind off the concert and all these other things happening to him.

You wrote for most of the day, composing a song meant to make him feel better. Aside from that, you used your free time to talk to your friends, catch up on your shows, and go grocery shopping. Some of your friends were also attending college in Seoul and they planned to go out tonight. You weren’t against going out, it just wasn’t your favorite thing. Yet here you were, putting on a dress, too short to be considered one, and getting ready to go out with them. You felt you looked good, hot even. You haven’t gotten dressed up like this in a while, let alone been to a party or club. Your friends claimed that you needed something to relieve your stress, their exact words being “someone” not “something”.

No one but your parents knew about your soulmate, and you didn’t want to tell anyone else yet. Having a soulmate was a big deal, and you didn’t want the night to turn into them trying to find him for you. But you also didn’t want them to push you onto another guy. It felt like you were cheating. But how could you cheat on someone who was yours, but didn’t know you existed yet? It was complicated. Looking at your phone you saw it was nearing 9 pm, you all agreed to meet up at the house the party was being thrown at 9. It wasn’t a far drive from your apartment, so you took your time getting ready and ordering your Uber.

The guys could tell Beomgyu wasn’t okay. He was normally good at hiding his emotions, but his distress was written plainly on his face. There was another party tonight, and it surprisingly took convincing from his friends for him to go. He gave himself one last look in the mirror, satisfied with how he looked. Kai said he needed a distraction or two, and he knew what he meant. It was around 9:30 p.m. when they met up in the general lounge area after getting ready. Taehyun slung an arm over his shoulders.

“This is just nerves because of the concert. But don’t worry, after our concert, we’ll start up our tradition again and things will be back to normal.” Taehyun said and smirked, giving him a nudge.

He was right. This was all just nerves. Beomgyu was fine, he just needed to let go at this party.

You’ve only been here for an hour and you remember why you didn’t go to parties often. You felt awkward, people you recognized from school were here yet you still felt like an outsider. This was technically your first college party. You stood in a corner of the crowded living room, clutching a red plastic cup filled with cheap beer. Your eyes scanned the room, taking in the throngs of people laughing, shouting, and dancing to a throbbing bass beat. You felt a pang of regret for coming here, or maybe it was just the ache in your chest that all of a sudden spiked again. Your soulmate was here. Despite that, you thought it was a mistake to follow your friends and attend this party.

It didn’t take long for Beomgyu to get comfortable, the party scene being a familiar environment for him and his friends. As soon as he set foot into the house, the ache in his chest spiked again but he wasn’t going to let it bother him this time. After a few drinks, he found himself in the middle of a group of girls. He was sitting in the middle of the couch, girls surrounding him trying to get a word in or touch him in some way. Beomgyu smirked, enjoying the attention but his mind was elsewhere. He scanned the room, his eyes landing on you. You were standing in the corner, looking uncomfortable and out of place. Beomgyu’s heart ached at the sight of you, you were beautiful, too beautiful to be alone like that.

You couldn't stay here. You had no idea where your friends disappeared and your soulmate was here. It was overwhelming to think that someone in this plethora of mostly tipsy people, was your person. Your eyes did another scan of the room, looking for any signs of your friends. Instead of your friends though, your eyes found a boy. He was on the couch, surrounded by a group of beautiful girls vying for his attention. It made sense because he was gorgeous, prettier than anyone you’ve ever seen probably. His gaze shifted to you and you felt weak in the knees. Shaking your head and looking away, you took a deep breath and made your way to the door.

Beomgyu excused himself from the girls and made his way towards where you were. He could feel his heart pounding in his chest, he was nervous but he knew he had to make a move. When he got up though, he saw that you were gone. He panicked for a moment, realizing that he might have missed his opportunity. However, he quickly regained his composure, telling himself that he wouldn't let you slip away that easily. Beomgyu maneuvered his way through the crowd, looking around the room frantically for any sign of you, but you were nowhere to be found. The ache in his chest settled, but now it was replaced by his heart pounding, full of disappointment.

You got back to your apartment not too long after you left the party, quickly texting your friends and telling them that you went home. The ache dissipated as soon as you stepped out of the house. Your soulmate was at that party, but all you could think about was the boy you locked eyes with.

Days passed and you still couldn't get the boy from the party out of your head. His image kept flashing before your eyes, making it hard to focus. You weren't sure what it was about him that had you so captivated. Maybe it was the way his eyes seemed to light up when they met yours or the way he carried himself with an air of confidence that made you weak in the knees. Whatever it was, you wanted to see him again. The concert is tomorrow and the label called you earlier today, inviting you to come. You already made up your mind though, way before they called.

Beomgyu couldn’t get you out of his mind. Even after he went back to his group of girls at the party, you were all he could think about. Days had passed since the party and he tried looking for you on campus. He was completely distracted, even messing up during rehearsal for their concert tomorrow. As he walked back to his dorm room, Beomgyu couldn't shake off the feeling of disappointment. He was sure he missed his chance with you, and he knew he couldn't let that happen again. He needed to see you again. Maybe you’ll be there tomorrow. It was a long shot, but it was worth a try. This was unfamiliar to him, usually he was the one being sought after and he let girls come to him. Not the other way around. But you, something was pulling him to you, something inside him was saying "Go talk to her."

The next night came and Beomgyu was determined to perform his heart out. He knew it was a long shot that you would be there, so he tried to focus solely on the performance. As soon as the band started playing, Beomgyu felt a wave of emotion come over him. It was like his heart was speaking through the music, telling a story of longing and desire. He sang with all his heart, every note ringing true. The song Lyric wrote couldn't be more perfect, and Taehyun and Kai were feeding off of Beomgyu's and the crowd's energy. The crowd went wild, cheering loudly, and were full of awe at the lyrics of their new single. But amidst all the noise and excitement, Beomgyu's eyes were searching the crowd for you. You were nowhere to be found and his heart sank, but only for a split second. The lights were flashing, the crowd was still screaming and he felt alive. The audience yelled their approval and the show was over before they knew it.

Beomgyu walked off stage after Kai and Taehyun, feeling a complete rush of adrenaline. As he walked backstage, he couldn't help but scan the crowd again, hoping for a glimpse of you. However, you were still nowhere to be found. Beomgyu's heart sank once more, but he knew he had to keep it together. He couldn't let his disappointment show, especially in front of his fans. After the concert, they were all signing autographs and taking pictures, flirting around to see who they'd take back to their dressing rooms. Beomgyu tried his best to keep his cool, sexy rockstar image up, but he didn't feel like taking some random girl back this time. His heart just wasn't in it. He sent a quick look to Taehyun and Kai, who looked at him surprised but still nodded back, and he left without another word, leaving the girls who were killing for their chance with him confused.

The song you wrote for them became a huge hit and the label called you again, wanting you to write another one for them. You couldn’t deny how much your heart skipped a beat when they said the members were requesting it personally. You told the label that you would love to, however after you agreed to one more song, their request quickly changed from one to enough songs for a full-length album. They didn’t let you respond before they hung up on you, your mouth still hanging open in shock. Sighing you closed your eyes, trying not to panic because you knew you had more than enough lyrics written, but they were just that- lyrics.

Opening your eyes, you went to your room, retrieved your laptop, and looked up the band. You thought you should at least know their names and what they looked like if you were going to be writing their next album. You also wanted to hear what the final, produced version of your song sounded like. You looked up their band name and the title of your song first, playing the audio version. Your eyes widened at the sound of a deep, smooth voice starting the song, goosebumps forming along your arm. You assumed this was the lead singer, his voice sending shivers down your spine as the song continued. When it came to an end, you were left in awe, they did your words justice and you felt proud. Shaking yourself out of it, you looked up the band name next and their group picture made your heart stop. There he was, right in the middle of the trio, the boy from the party. Pictures didn’t do him justice, you concluded. The more pictures of them you went through, you found yourself looking at him more than the other two. Not on purpose, your eyes just naturally gravitating to him. Your heart was racing again like the night you saw him for the first time.

However, the ache in your chest suddenly reminded you of your soulmate and you went from feeling awestruck to guilty in mere seconds. Was it possible to feel attraction to someone that wasn’t your soulmate? Or maybe he was your soulmate… You didn’t know and you were confusing yourself.

Shaking your head to snap out of it, you clicked through a few links. The members' names were Kai (whom you already met by chance), Taheyun, and Beomgyu. Kai played drums and sometimes sang, Taehyun played the keyboard and sang, and Beomgyu played guitar and was the lead singer. You couldn't help but feel drawn to Beomgyu. You chastised yourself for even thinking about him this much. You had a soulmate, for crying out loud. You closed your laptop and lay back on your bed, trying to clear your head. But every time you closed your eyes, you saw Beomgyu's face and heard his voice singing your words.

Beomgyu was still feeling the adrenaline from the show last night even though it's morning now. It felt like an eternity since he stepped off stage yet he could still remember every moment in perfect detail - every reaction from the crowd, every part of himself he gave in each song. The label was pleased with the reaction to the new single and said they were thinking about making Lyric the official new songwriter. Beomgyu couldn't believe it. He knew that they had something special with the song Lyric wrote, but for the label to consider bringing her on as their official new songwriter was a dream come true. He knew he had to meet her, to thank her personally for the magic she brought back to their music. His mind then shifted from Lyric to you. He wished you showed up last night. He was all over the place, he felt drawn to both you and Lyric, and for the first time, he didn’t know what to do.

The semester ended not long after, and you and Beomgyu welcomed the reprieve. During the break, you composed songs for the band's next album, communicating with the label only through your alias "Lyric" and over the phone. The label was awestruck with your gift and offered you a job to be the band's official songwriter in exchange. You accepted without hesitation since this was practically your wish come true. And so that's how you secured a permanent job, all the while hoping your second semester wouldn't be as hectic as the first.

Beomgyu spent his break trying to clear his head. He couldn't stop thinking about you and Lyric. It was like he was being pulled in two different directions, each one equally tempting. He couldn't decide who he was more drawn to, and he was starting to feel guilty about it. He had never felt this way before. He was a rockstar, he was confident and in control. But now, he felt lost and confused. They had two shows over the break and he found solace in the usual flashing lights and screaming fans. But it didn't last too long.

He and his friends also started recording the songs for their new album, most of them being written and composed by Lyric. Beomgyu couldn't help but feel a spark of excitement every time Lyric's words were sung. They were all so raw and emotional, and they fit the band's style perfectly. They fit him perfectly, and it never failed to surprise him, how understood he felt. He found himself constantly thinking about her, wondering who she was and what she looked like. He wanted to tell her how much the songs meant to him, how they made him feel alive and understood. But he couldn't. He didn't even know who she was.

When you arrived on campus the following Monday, it marked the beginning of the second semester. You didn’t expect to see Beomgyu sitting under a tree by the lake with his guitar. You went the entire first semester without seeing him once.

“What was he doing here so early?” you thought to yourself, watching the way his fingers gently strummed at the guitar. You couldn't help but smile at the way his fingers moved effortlessly over the strings. He was so focused, and so passionate, and it was beautiful to watch. You couldn't bring yourself to go over there like you originally planned, so instead, you decided to leave him be and simply admire him from afar for a little before leaving. While walking back to the main area of the campus, the warm feeling was still present from your dream, so you brought your mind back to your soulmate. The dreams still occur every night and from what you can remember from last night, your soulmate has been feeling a mixture of things. Most of all though, he was confused, just like you.

As the week went by, you couldn't help but think about Beomgyu. You've been seeing him more on campus lately, in the library, in the cafeteria, in between classes. He was either with his bandmates or surrounded by girls, and an obnoxious smirk took over his pretty face most of the time. You tried to push him out of your mind, but it was like he was always there, lurking in the back of your thoughts.``It's just because he's so pretty." You kept trying to remind yourself, also recalling the one time you heard him open his mouth, his words making your eyes roll. You had a soulmate, and that was all that mattered. Your soulmate was perfect to you, perfect for you, and he wasn't an obnoxious rockstar who thought he was better than everyone.

You tried to avoid him as much as possible, but fate seemed to have other plans. One day, while walking to your next class, you accidentally bumped into him, your lyrics and sheet music flying out of your hands and scattering across the hallway.

"I'm so sorry," you said, bending down to pick up your things.

"It's fine," Beomgyu said softly, crouching down to help you. As your hands brushed briefly while reaching for the same paper, a spark went off and that warmth spread throughout your entire body, you looked up at him, surprised. He didn't give you a single look though, but even that didn't diminish your surprise.

At that moment, you knew. You found him. Beomgyu was your soulmate.

You tried to shake off the feeling to remain calm and gather your papers, but Beomgyu’s touch lingered on your hand, sending shivers down your spine. You looked up at him again, and he met your gaze this time. You could see the surprise and confusion in his eyes as well.

“Do you feel that?” he whispered, his voice barely audible above the noise in the hallway.

You nodded, unable to speak. You knew exactly what he was talking about. The warmth, the spark, the connection. It was unmistakable.

"I've been looking for you," he admitted, his eyes not leaving yours.

When he finally acknowledged you, his eyes were full of surprise. It was you, the beautiful girl from the party, the one he couldn’t get out of his head. His world felt like it finally aligned again, the warmth he would feel every morning, was present now while he was in front of you. The mark on his arm tingled, as if reminding him that it was there. He looked at the papers he picked up for you, “(y/n)” he read to himself, “so that was your name.” He then remembered that the mark on his arm was of a pen.

"Wait, are you a composer?" He asked, eyes widening in realization.

You couldn't believe what was happening. Beomgyu was your soulmate? The obnoxious rockstar who you'd been trying to avoid since the semester started, was the one you were meant to be with? It didn't make any sense. But as you looked into his eyes, you knew it was true. The way he looked at you, the way he touched your hand, it was all too real. And it felt right. The connection between you was too strong to ignore. But you can’t do this right now. Instead of answering him, you hurriedly took your papers from him and walked off in the opposite direction, not giving him a chance to say anything else.

You found yourself in a space between two buildings outside. Your heart was racing, and you couldn’t breathe. After you calmed down, you closed your eyes, your head leaning back and gently hitting the wall. You were mad at yourself first of all. Mad for judging him without even talking to him. You knew your soulmate, but you didn’t know Beomgyu. You thought you didn't want to know Beomgyu. But now you did. And it scared you. You didn't know how to handle it. It was like everything you thought you knew was turned upside down. You took a deep breath and opened your eyes, knowing that you had to face him eventually. You couldn't ignore your soulmate. You couldn’t stay on campus right now either, so you blew off your classes and went back to your apartment.

Beomgyu stood there, shocked. You ran away from him. His shock was replaced by confusion and then by longing — a need to figure out what everything meant. You clearly knew something based on your reaction, but he didn’t know much. What he did know was that he liked how he felt with you, like it was comfortable and exciting all at once. He liked the way his heart raced when he looked into your eyes, the way his skin tingled when he touched your hand, the way everything just clicked into place. Instead of classes, he went back to his dorm, he wasn’t going to get anything out of you right now so he had to do some research of his own.

As you walked into your apartment, you couldn't help but feel overwhelmed. You needed to clear your head and figure out what to do next. It also wasn't fair to leave Beomgyu hanging like that, he probably had a lot of questions. You sat down on your bed and closed your eyes, taking deep breaths to calm yourself. It was all too much to process, and you needed to sort everything out. You remembered the different types of soul links your mom told you about, trying to piece together everything that linked you and Beomgyu. You couldn’t do this by yourself, you needed him. You always needed someone like him, but right now, you needed him because you both had to put this together.

When Beomgyu got to his dorm, he went to his room and took out his laptop. He started to research all the things he’s been feeling and the mark on his arm. He came to the conclusion that he had a soulmate. You. You were his soulmate and you had to have known that. He was one of the very few to have a soulmate and he found you. He couldn't believe it. He felt like the luckiest man in the world. But then he realized that you ran away from him earlier. He didn't know why, but he knew he had to find you. He needed you, he felt as if he always needed you, but right now, you two needed to talk.

That night you couldn’t sleep, you couldn’t stop thinking about him. You tossed and turned in bed, trying to quell the butterflies that seemed to be dancing in your stomach. You knew all about him, and he probably didn’t know a thing about you, not even your name. Did he get the same ache in his chest you did? Did it turn into that warm feeling when he woke up too? Did he have dreams like you? If he’s your soulmate, what was he so distressed about that one time? All these questions and more swirled around in your head. One thing you knew for sure though, you wanted to be there for him, always.

He couldn't stop thinking about you either. He wanted to know everything about you, your hopes, your dreams. He wanted to be the one to make you laugh when you were feeling down, the one to hold you close when you were feeling alone. He wanted to be there for you, always. That was the one thing he was sure about amidst all the confusion.

You woke up early the next morning, not having slept much to begin with. You stretched out your arms, feeling a satisfying ache course through your body. You didn't have a dream last night, which you expected, but it didn't stop you from waking up feeling warm and fuzzy inside. The first coherent thing on your mind was Beomgyu. You needed to see him today, no matter what. Even though you had no classes today, you were still going to campus to look for him. You knew exactly where to go. You just hoped he had the same idea.

Beomgyu woke up early the next morning. He stretched his arms wide, letting out a yawn that reverberated through his chest. Placing a hand on his heart, he recalled yesterday's events, a smile blooming across his face at the thought of you. You were all he could think about now and he needed to see you again. Despite having just one class today, something pulled him towards the lake this morning. The scent of fresh dew coated the grass beneath his feet as he walked down the dirt path, still quiet in these early morning hours. Birds chirped overhead as he approached the sparkling waters of the lake. The surface rippled gently in tune with the slight breeze. A sense of calm washed over him as he took in the beauty before him, he took his place under the big tree he always sat under and started to strum at his guitar.

As you walked towards the lake, you could hear the sound of a guitar in the distance. You smiled to yourself, knowing that it was Beomgyu. You could see him sitting under the big tree by the lake, strumming. Beomgyu noticed you and paused his playing, looking up at you with a small smile. You felt your heart skip a beat as his eyes met yours, the same way they did at the party. You quickly looked down, feeling a blush creeping up on your cheeks. Beomgyu cleared his throat, breaking the silence.

"Good morning," he said, his voice smooth and deep, sending shivers down your spine.

You looked up at him and smiled.

"Good morning," you replied softly.

"What are you doing here so early?"

Beomgyu chuckled, closing his guitar case.

"I come here sometimes to practice," he said, standing up.

"It's peaceful here, isn't it?"

You nodded. You felt comfortable around Beomgyu.

"I agree," you said softly.

"It's my favorite place on campus."

“Mine too.”

"Beomgyu," you said softly, your heart racing and you squeezed your eyes shut. "Can we talk?"

As you stood there, waiting for his response, you heard footsteps approaching. You opened your eyes and saw Beomgyu standing in front of you.

"I'm sorry," he said, his voice soft. "I didn't mean to scare you off."

You looked up at him, feeling a mix of emotions.

"No, I'm sorry for running away earlier. I just needed some time to process everything."

"It's okay," he said quickly.

"I understand. I've been doing some research myself, and I think I know what's going on."

You felt a wave of relief wash over you. You weren't alone in this.

"What do you mean?" you asked, your curiosity piqued.

"I think we're soulmates," he said simply, and you could hear the smile in his voice.

You couldn’t help but smile too. You were glad he figured it out. You reached out to gently grasp his hand and intertwine your fingers, sparks shooting up your arm more intense than yesterday.

“We are.” You confirmed, giving his hand a gentle squeeze.

Beomgyu's eyes widened in surprise at the sudden sparks that shot up his arm. He felt a jolt of electricity run through his body as he looked into your eyes. He had never felt such a strong connection with anyone before. It was like you were meant to be together.

"I can't believe it," he whispered, pulling you closer to him. "We're soulmates."

You felt a rush of electricity through your body at his touch. You had never felt so safe and secure with anyone before. It was like everything in your life finally made sense. You leaned into him, feeling his arms wrap around you in a tight embrace.

"I've been dreaming about you," you admitted, feeling a sense of embarrassment wash over you.

Beomgyu pulled back slightly, looking at you with a gentle smile. He held out his arm to you, and a small gasp left your lips. On his arm was a small mark, it was shaped like a pen.

“Can you see it?” He asked, “When I showed my friends my arm, they couldn’t see anything.” He continued and chuckled softly.

“They thought I was crazy and had some sort of sixth sense or something.”

“I can see it.” You reached out to touch the pen mark on his arm, feeling the warmth of his skin under your fingertips.

Beomgyu shuddered at your touch, feeling the sparks fly between you. You felt them too, and you knew that this was real, that he was the one for you.

“You probably have a lot of questions,” you said and looked up at him, letting your fingers trail down his arm to take his hand in yours again.

Beomgyu nodded, his eyes fixed on you. He had so many questions he wanted to ask you, but at that moment, all he wanted was to be close to you, to hold you in his arms, and never let go.

"I do," he said softly, his thumb rubbing circles on the back of your hand. "But right now, all I want is to be with you. Is that okay?"

You smiled up at him, feeling your heart swell with affection.

"It's more than okay," you said, leaning into him. "I want to be with you too."

Beomgyu's eyes sparkled with happiness at your words. He felt like he was on top of the world, with you by his side.

"Let's go for a walk," he said, taking your hand and leading you down the dirt path that ran alongside the lake.

You walked hand in hand, enjoying the quietness of the morning. Birds chirped overhead, and the sun began to rise, casting a golden glow over everything in sight. You felt the warmth of Beomgyu's hand in yours, and you couldn't help but feel grateful for this moment.

As you walked, Beomgyu told you all about the research he had done on soulmates the night before. He had read countless books and articles, trying to understand the strange things he was experiencing. You listened intently, fascinated by the depth of his knowledge on the subject and by him in general. You answered any questions he had and told him all about your parents. You two realized the depth of your bond. You shared talents, he was the reason you could play guitar and you were the reason he could sing. The dreams, after you met Kai and he mentioned the two of you to each other vaguely, it was like a bridge. Every night since then, Beomgyu visited you in your dreams, where you got to learn about him. Now he knows why he would wake up feeling like he just came back from somewhere. The mark appeared on his arm the same day you woke up from having your first dream. The pen was because you were a songwriter and only him and his soulmate, you, could see it.

"So what do we do now?" you asked, stopping to take in the view of the lake.

The water shimmered in the sunlight, reflecting the beauty of the world around you.

"I think we should just take it one day at a time," Beomgyu said, standing beside you.

"We don't need to rush anything. We have all the time in the world."

You nodded, feeling a sense of relief wash over you. You didn't want to rush anything either. You just wanted to enjoy this moment, to be with Beomgyu and feel the sparks between you.

As you walked along the lake, hand in hand, you knew that this was just the beginning of something special. You had found your soulmate, and you were going to do everything in your power to keep him close.

"Thank you for being here with me," you said softly, looking up at him. "I'm happy I found you."

Beomgyu's eyes softened, and he leaned down to place a soft kiss on your forehead. You felt the warmth of his lips, and your heart swelled with adoration.

"I'll always be here," he said, pulling you close. "No matter what. You're kind of stuck with me now," he added and both of you giggled softly.

Your hand was still in his, and you didn't want to let go. You never wanted to let go.

“You have a class you said?” you asked him.

He nodded. “ It’s the last thing on my mind though,” he said and gently nudged your shoulder.

You blushed and giggled at him again, "Can I walk you to your class?"

"Of course, you can," Beomgyu replied, smiling down at you. "I'd love that."

Together, you made your way to the music department, taking your time as you walked hand in hand. You couldn't help but feel happy and content, knowing that you had Beomgyu by your side.

As you walked him to his class, he couldn't help but feel grateful for this moment. He knew that he was going to cherish every moment he had with you.

You reached Beomgyu's classroom after some time, and you stopped outside the door and turned to face him.

"I'll see you soon," he said, before turning and entering the classroom.

You stood outside the door, watching as he disappeared inside. You couldn't help but feel excited about what the future held for the two of you. You knew that you were meant to be together, and you couldn't wait to see what adventures lay ahead. As you turned to leave, you felt a hand on your shoulder. You turned back to see Beomgyu standing in front of you, a small smile on his lips.

"I almost forgot something," he said,

You felt his hand on your back, bringing you closer to him. You wrapped your arms around his neck as he pulled you into a hug. It was innocent, just a hug, but you felt like you were floating on air. When you pulled back, Beomgyu placed a hand on your cheek, looking into your eyes.

"I'll see you soon," he said again, before turning to enter the classroom. You watched him go, feeling your heart flutter. You stood there for a few moments more, just taking in the moment before you finally turned and started walking home.

It had been a few months since that day, but the memory still stayed with you in your mind often. You and Beomgyu had grown so much closer over those months, learning more about each other every day. You both spent more time together - going for walks in the park, exploring new places, or just cuddling up under a blanket watching movies at his dorm. He was your best friend now, your other half, the love of your life and he made every day brighter. Every time you were together, it felt like magic – like all of your dreams were coming true. You both shared something special that could never be broken: your souls connected by music and love.

One day, as you sat in Beomgyu's dorm room, strumming his guitar while he sang along softly, you looked up at him and thought about how lucky you were to have found him. He was everything you had ever wanted in a person and more. You couldn't imagine your life without him. There was something you still haven't told him though. You were struggling to tell Beomgyu that you were Lyric, the songwriter his band was always praising. Every time he and the others talked about her, you could feel your heart flutter. You wanted to tell him but something held you back; all the songs you wrote for them had been about him or inspired by him and you wanted to tell him that was why he felt so understood.

You took a deep breath, setting the guitar aside as you turned to face him. Beomgyu looked at you curiously, his eyes shining.

"What's going on?" he asked, sitting up slightly.

You took another deep breath, trying to steady your nerves. This was something you had been meaning to tell him for a while, but you had always chickened out at the last minute. But now, with him looking at you with so much love and trust, you knew that it was finally time to tell him the truth.

"Beomgyu," you started, your voice barely above a whisper. "There's something I need to tell you."

Beomgyu's gaze intensified, and he reached out to take your hand in his. You felt his thumb rubbing soothing circles on your skin, and you took that as a sign to continue.

“I’m Lyric,” you mumbled almost inaudibly.

Beomgyu's eyes widened in surprise, and he sat up straighter, looking at you in awe.

"Lyric?" he repeated, his voice barely above a whisper.

You nodded, unable to meet his gaze. You could feel butterflies swirling in your stomach, and you wondered what Beomgyu was thinking. Would he be mad that you hadn't told him earlier? Would he be disappointed that it was you?

"Why didn't you tell me?" he asked softly, his voice gentle.

You took a deep breath, gathering your thoughts.

"I didn't know how to," you admitted. "I was afraid you'd be disappointed that it was me and not some princess with magic songwriting powers or something."

Beomgyu's expression softened, and he squeezed your hand.

"I think it's incredible. I think you're incredible. You have such a gift, and I can't believe you've been writing songs for me this whole time."

You blushed. "I entered the contest and had no idea what to write. Not until I had that first dream. All my songs were written and inspired by my soulmate, which I now know is you.." you trailed off, hiding your face behind your hands.

Beomgyu chuckled, pulling your hands away from your face gently. "Why are you hiding? You have nothing to be ashamed of. I think it's amazing that you found inspiration in me, and I'm honored that you wrote those songs for our band. We couldn't have gotten this far now without you."

You looked up at him, feeling tears pricking at the corners of your eyes. "I'm just so relieved that you're not mad," you said, your voice barely above a whisper.

Beomgyu leaned in, pressing a gentle kiss to your forehead. "I could never be mad at you, my love. You're the most amazing person I've ever met, and I feel so lucky to have you in my life."

"And for the record, you are a princess with magic songwriting powers," he added and you playfully pushed him.

"And another thing, I wouldn't be who I am today without you either." He said while tucking a strand of your hair behind your ear.

You smiled, feeling your heart swell with love for the boy in front of you.

"I never thought I'd find someone like you," you said quietly, your eyes locked with his.

Beomgyu's lips curved into a smile. "Well, you've found me now, and I'm not going anywhere."

You leaned in to kiss him but were interrupted by a knock at the door. Beomgyu groaned in frustration, but you both knew he had to answer it. As he got up to go to the door, you couldn't help but feel a sense of frustration. You were finally about to kiss him, and now you had to wait. This was another thing, every time you and Beomgyu were going to kiss, something got in the way. Every single time.

Beomgyu opened the door, and in walked another member of his band - Kai. You smiled when he walked in, him being you and Beomgyu’s biggest shipper. You got up from the bed, clearing your throat to get his attention.

"Hi, Kai," you said sweetly.

"Hey," he replied animatedly, before turning to Beomgyu. "We've got a meeting with the label in an hour. We need to start getting ready."

Beomgyu sighed, knowing that he had to go. He turned to you, a look of apology on his face.

"I'm sorry, Y/N. I have to go," he said, his hand reaching out to grab yours.

You nodded, feeling a sense of disappointment wash over you. "It's okay, Beomie. You have to go do what you have to do."

You got up from his bed and kissed him on the cheek, Kai holding his hand up for a high five which you granted. You said bye to Taehyun who was in the lounge area of their dorm and went back to your apartment. When you arrived at your apartment, you decided to take a hot shower to relax. Shower thoughts flooded your brain as you stood under the steamy water. You realize Beomgyu has never been to your apartment before, all the time you guys have spent with each other has either been at his dorm or out somewhere.

The thought of Beomgyu coming to your apartment made you feel nervous and excited at the same time. You could imagine him sitting on your couch, the two of you cuddled up under a blanket, just like you always did at his dorm. However, here there would be no interruptions. But then again, what if he didn't like your apartment?

You shook your head, trying to get rid of those negative thoughts. You knew Beomgyu wouldn't judge you like that, and even if he did, it wouldn't change how he felt about you. You dried yourself off and got dressed, feeling a sense of excitement building up inside you.

You decided to call Beomgyu to see if he was free to come over. He picked up after the first ring, and you could hear the sound of music playing in the background.

"Hey, Beomie," you greeted him, feeling a smile spread across your face. "Are you busy?"

Beomgyu chuckled on the other end of the line. "Just practicing with the band, why? What's up?"

"I was wondering if you wanted to come over to my place. Maybe tomorrow night? I know we've never hung out at my apartment before, and I thought it could be fun," you said, trying to keep the excitement out of your voice.

There was a pause on the other end of the line, and you could hear muffled talking in the background. Finally, Beomgyu spoke up.

"Yeah, I'd love to princess. You can give me a tour of your place and everything," he said, and you could practically hear the smirk on his face.

You felt your heart skip a beat. Beomgyu was actually coming over to your place.

"I can practically hear you smirking, pretty boy. I'll see you tomorrow then."

Beomgyu chuckled. "Sorry, sorry. I just can't wait to see your place." His voice dropped down to a low murmur. "And maybe see what other surprises you have in store for me."

You felt your cheeks heat up at his words. "Beomie, don't be naughty," you scolded him, but you couldn't deny the thrill that ran down your spine at the thought of spending the night with him alone in your apartment.

"I can't make any promises," he replied, his voice low and sultry. "But I'll behave if you want me to."

You laughed, feeling your nerves calm down a little. "No, it's okay. I like it when you're naughty. Besides, you're still handsy even when you claim you're behaving."

Beomgyu chuckled, and you could hear the smile in his voice. "I can't help it. You bring out the naughty side in me," he said, his voice dropping to a whisper.

You felt a shiver run down your spine at his words. "Well, I'll see you tomorrow then," you said, trying to keep your voice steady.

"I can't wait, princess," he replied, before ending the call.

The next day, you spent the day cleaning and preparing for Beomgyu's arrival. You wanted everything to be perfect for him.

When he finally arrived at your apartment, you couldn't help but feel nervous. He smiled as soon as you opened the door, making you feel at ease.

"Hey, princess," he said, pulling you into a tight hug. "You look beautiful."

You blushed, feeling a surge of happiness wash over you. "Thanks, Beomie. You look handsome as always," you replied.

"Wow, your apartment is amazing!" Beomgyu exclaimed, looking around in awe. "You never told me you had such good taste."

You giggled. “You don’t think it’s a bit..much?”

"Not at all," Beomgyu replied, walking over to you and taking your hand. "It's just like you, beautiful and perfect."

You blushed and looked away, feeling a little embarrassed at his words.

Beomgyu chuckled and lifted your chin, looking into your eyes. "Don't be shy, (y/n). You should know by now how much I adore you."

You smiled at him, feeling the warmth of his love surrounding you. "I do, Beomie. I adore you just as much."

"Why are you blushing? Is it cause we're finally alone with no interruptions?" he asked and playfully nudged you.

You blushed even harder at his words, and you could feel your heart racing in your chest. You had been waiting for this moment, and now that it was finally here, you didn't know what to do. You nodded, feeling the butterflies in your stomach start to flutter.

"Maybe," you said, a smile spreading across your face.

Beomgyu stepped closer to you, his arms wrapping around your waist. "Well, I have a surprise for you too," he whispered in your ear, his breath hot against your skin.

You felt a shiver run down your spine at his words. "What is it?" you asked, turning to face him.

Beomgyu grinned at you, his eyes sparkling with mischief. He looked around the living room once more, “Why don’t you give me the tour of your place first?” He whispered and put his arm around you. You leaned into his touch, resting your cheek on his shoulder.

“The music room is probably my favorite, I spend most of my time in there or on the balcony,” you said softly while tracing the veins along his free arm. You heard him let out a small sigh at the feeling of your touch.

“Then take me to the music room, princess. That’s where the magic happens right?” He said, lips turning upward into a smirk.

“Okay, Beomie.” You took his hand in yours and gently pulled him along, leading him to where the music room is. You led him down a hallway, stopping at one of many doors. You opened it, the familiar squeak of the hinges filling your senses with joy and you smiled up at him proudly. He stepped inside and took a look around the room you practically lived in, carefully examining each instrument on display with awe. Your heart pounded as he walked by every instrument in the room, this room was like your pride and joy. You hoped he was impressed by it.

As Beomgyu continued to look around the music room, you couldn't help but feel proud of yourself. You had worked hard to make this space your own, and it was clear that Beomgyu was impressed. You watched as he picked up your guitar, strumming a few chords before setting it back down.

"You're so talented, (y/n)," Beomgyu said, turning to face you and leaning against one of the walls.

"I had no idea you could play so many instruments. You're amazing."

You felt a warm blush spread across your cheeks at his compliments.

He pushed himself off from against the wall and took a seat on one of the cushioned benches, motioning for you to come over. You obliged and he wrapped his arms around your waist, pulling you to sit in his lap.

“Now can I listen to the songs you've been working on for the band? Or are you still trying to be sneaky and keep it hidden from me?”

“Mm, it's not finished though.” You said and wrapped your arms around his neck after being pulled into his lap.

He tightened his hold on your hips and smiled at you. “Well, I’d still rather listen to an unfinished song than nothing at all. Or are you just hiding something from me?” his smile turned into a small smirk.

“And why would I hide anything from you, Beomie?” You whispered softly and looked up to meet his eyes.

He leaned down slightly, his mouth coming close to your ear, “Maybe cause you want me to beg a little…” He whispered and let his lips linger by your neck for a little before pulling away.

“And maybe, just maybe…” he started again, taking his hand and tracing the curve of your neck.

“You think it's cute? Watching me beg..”

“And why would I make you beg me? Hm?” Your voice stayed in a whisper, and you cupped one of his cheeks.

He looked you in the eyes and grinned.

“Why would you make me beg, you ask? I don’t know… you know how I feel about you-“ he paused when he felt your hand touch his cheek.

“But who knows what you can get out of me.” He smirked and leaned down to kiss your cheek.

“Maybe you can make me beg for a kiss… or a little more.”

The touch of his lips to your cheek was enough to light your whole body on fire.

You shuddered lightly and moved his hair away from his face. “And what kind of person would I be if I made my soulmate beg, hm?” You asked softly.

He felt a blush creep onto his cheeks as you lightly brushed his hair out of his face. This time, you leaned forward and lightly touched your lips to the corner of his. Not kissing him properly yet.

He let out a soft gasp and you watched as his lips parted slightly in shock, not expecting you to lean in. His breath got caught in his throat and he kept his gaze locked onto yours. His hands moved down from your hips to your thighs, fingers lightly digging into them, the heat of the moment getting to both of you right now.

“Beom?” You whispered, eyes flicking down to his lips.

His heart skips a beat at the soft sound of your voice.

“Yes (y/n)?” He whispered back, face now flushed and his eyes trailed downward, gaze now glued onto your lips too.

“Kiss me, please.”

He stared at you for a second, processing what you just asked. The slight shock wearing off was replaced by desirousness, and he grinned.

“With pleasure, princess.”

He leaned in while pulling you closer to him and connected your lips, finally. His eyes closed right before your lips touched, his heart hammering against his chest. The moment the gap closed between you, your eyes fluttered closed, already lost in the moment. Your arms around his neck pulled him closer, as close as he could get to you. You felt his hands trail up and down your sides, settling on your thighs once again. Your lips parted slightly, you taking the opportunity to gently bite his lower lip, bringing them back together with yours, not wanting this to end just yet.

Beomgyu's lips were soft but demanding, and they made your heart race. You felt the heat between you grow as you allowed yourself to get lost in the moment. His tongue grazed your bottom lip, asking for permission to deepen the kiss. You granted it, allowing him to explore your mouth until you both needed to come up for air. He pulled away from you, but only enough to look into your eyes. Your faces were so close that you could feel his breath on your lips. You felt his fingers trailing up and down your thighs and his grip on them tightening.

“God, I want you (y/n),” he breathed out.

You leaned in and kissed him again, this time with more urgency. You could feel his reaction instantly as he groaned into the kiss and his grip on your thighs tightened even more. You moved your hands from around his neck to run them through his hair, tugging lightly as he deepened the kiss even more. It wasn't long before the heat between you both became unbearable and you broke the kiss, feeling breathless. You looked at each other for a moment, both of you panting slightly.

“I want you too,” you whispered, cupping his cheek with one hand while the other trailed down his chest.

Beomgyu took in a sharp breath as your hand continued to trail down his chest. His heart sped up and his mouth hung slightly open.

“Let's take this to your room," He whispered.

You nodded quickly and told him your room was the last door to the right. He lifted you up in his arms and stood up from the bench, moving quickly out of the music room with you cradled safely in his arms. Once you were both in your room, he gently laid you down on the bed. You looked up at him as he hovered above you, the desire in his eyes captivating yours and making your heart race even faster.

“Are you ready for my surprise now?” He asked, his voice soft and full of want.

You nodded at him quickly and wrapped your arms around his neck. He leaned down and gave you a light kiss. He slowly trailed down your jaw and reached the sensitive spot behind your ear. His breath tickled and sent shivers down your spine.

You lay next to him, slightly out of breath after what just happened, and felt him press a kiss to your cheek.

“Surprise,” he said teasingly.

You rolled your eyes but giggled softly and your heart skipped a beat as you looked at him. You sat up and picked up the shirt he was wearing earlier, slipping it over your head, the scent of him now enveloping all your senses.

"Was that really your surprise?" you asked him shyly.

Beomgyu had moved his head to rest on the pillow, facing you sideways, and propped up on his elbow.

He laughed at your shared bashfulness despite what you just did together, and kissed your forehead, “it was,”

He blushed and looked away from you for a quick moment, not used to this level of affection and intimacy. He looked back at you when you rested your head on your own pillow.

“This is my favorite thing to do,” he whispered, laying down properly and pulling you to his chest.

“Spending the day with you.”

Your heart sped up, from what he said, but also from the way you were currently pressed against him with your head resting against his chest, and he wrapped his arms around your waist to hold you close.

“I can hear your heartbeat,” you murmured, your eyes closing more with every word.

He smiled lovingly at you.

“Yeah? What does it sound like?”

“Like mine.”

Main Masterlist

Beomgyu Masterlist

a/n: and that’s the end! I absolutely adore soulmate aus and Beomgyu, and I’ve always wanted to try and write one of my own. I hope you enjoyed it, comments and reblogs are always appreciated <3

#✎˖ᝰbeomgyucoded✧˖°#choi beomgyu #beomgyu #beomgyu x reader #choi beomgyu imagines #txt beomgyu #txt x reader #beomgyu fluff #tomorrow x together #tomorrow x together Beomgyu #txt soulmate aus #⇢ ˗ˏˋ beomgyu 🧸 ࿐ྂ

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beomgyucoded · 2 months

Text

Genre: friends to lovers, fluff, teeny bit of angst

Word Count: 19.8 k

Summary: a collection of diary entries turned love letters that tell the story of how you fell in love with Choi Beomgyu

*previously released as a series

*regular text is present day

*bold text are the diary entries/letters

*italic text are flashbacks

Note: I live in the U.S. so I based the school years on how mine went. Parts are going to vary in length, some will be super short and others will be long with multiple diary entries. They become more complex as the reader gets older. Also, all the members are the same age in this story!

Right now, a smile tugged at the corner of his rosy lips, and his eyes turned to look down at the ground. His fingers twitched as he twirled the wispy ends of his shoulder-length hair and pulled them through his fingers like he was soothing himself. The shy, sweet smile on his face brought one to yours. He was so beautiful, and you know you weren’t the only one to think so. You were positive everyone either wanted him in any way they could have him or wanted to be him. It was a bet you could easily win, because for as long as you could remember, people would come up to you and ask if you knew the pretty boy with the shy smile.

To this, you always answered, “I do, but not well.”

Which was mostly true. You’ve been acquainted with the boy since you were six years old, and started elementary school. You could never forget the day you met and he gave you a small wave, his face mostly hidden because he was hiding behind his parents. That was the day you started to adore him. Being a simple minded six year old, when you went home that day, you wrote in your little notebook about him.

Years have gone by since then, and you're now in your late teens. You've watched him grow into an even more beautiful person, his features sharper and more defined, his hair still just as long and wispy as it was when he was a child. It seemed like everyone in your small town knew him, but he remained just as shy as ever, preferring to keep to himself or stick close to his group of friends.

You've continued writing since that first meeting, mentioning him in your notebook more times than you can count. All of it was words of admiration at first, before you became friends. The only interaction between the two of you was polite and brief. You were even shyer than him, so you stuck to just admiring him from afar, a simple smile or gesture of acknowledgement from him enough to make you blush a warm pink. As you got older, your friendship began to bud and now in high school, you were part of the same circle of friends.

You continued to watch him twirl his hair between his fingers, and you couldn't help but wonder what it would feel like to have those soft locks teasing your own fingertips. But you quickly brushed the thought aside, feeling your face heat up with embarrassment. You couldn't believe you even thought of doing something like that, let alone actually being able to do it. You looked away, casting your eyes downwards towards the open notebook in front of you on the lunch table.

Glancing back up at him from under your lashes, you saw that he was still lost in his own thoughts, his smile fading away slowly as he continued to twirl his hair absentmindedly. You wondered what he was thinking about. Perhaps he was contemplating something important, or maybe he was just lost in his own world as usual. Another thing, he was always writing. You often found him deep in thought and writing in a little black notebook. One that matched yours, except yours was filled with pretty words and poems and love letters you won't send.

September 4th, 2007

Today was my first day of school. I made a new friend that’s a boy. He was shy just like me. He hid behind his mommy and daddy but he waved at me. He looked kind of like a circle.

It was your first day of school and you were beyond excited. You woke up bright and early that morning, putting on the outfit you picked out the night before just for the first day.

Your parents dropped you off and you walked into class with a smile on your face, feeling nervous and shy but ready to start going to school. As you settled into your seat, you looked around the room and saw the other kids with their parents, either crying or holding onto them for dear life, not wanting to be left alone in a new environment without them.

But then you saw him.

He was standing behind his parents, hiding behind them. You tried to catch his eye and give him a friendly smile, hoping to make him feel welcome, despite feeling just as shy as him. Eventually, he saw you and waved back with a small smile. You felt happy that you had made a new friend and curious about him at the same time. The boy and you sat side by side during the morning assembly. Even though you were too shy to make conversation, just sitting next to each other felt comforting. You made slight attempts at communication. Glancing furtively at each other whenever your teacher wasn’t watching, and smiled ever so slightly when your eyes met for a brief moment before looking away again with blushing cheeks.

You learned his name was Beomgyu.

September 5th, 2007

I thought Beomgyu was my friend. When I got to school today, all the boys stayed with each other and all the girls stayed with each other while we were on the playground. He said the other boys said he couldn’t have friends that were girls because girls were icky. That hurt my feelings, if I’m icky, then he’s icky.

Beomgyu's interaction with the rest of his peers on that day started off well enough. He talked more today and tried to joke around with the other boys, trying to get over his shyness. But when the boys started grouping up together in one spot while the girls stayed by themselves in another, he suddenly stopped talking to you entirely and acted like you weren't friends at all anymore.

No matter how hard you tried to approach him or get his attention again he clearly sent out a message that felt like "you're not one of us" so it got harder for you to try again - especially after hearing those distressing words about how icky girls were. That was the last time you were talking to him, you decided.

As the school day went on, and being the pouty six year old you were, you found yourself avoiding Beomgyu at all costs. You didn't want to be associated with someone who would abandon their friend so easily. When school was over that day and you were waiting for your mom to pick you up, you felt a small tap on your shoulder. It was Beomgyu.

"I'm sorry," he whispered into your ear as he held onto your hand tightly.

"I didn't mean what I said earlier. You're not icky."

You looked up at him, a frown on your face.

"Why did you say that then?"

"I was just trying to be friends with the other boys," he admitted.

"it's okay," you forgave him easily.

He smiled.

"Can we still be friends?" he asked sheepishly, extending his pinkie towards you.

It was then that some of the other boys in your class saw the two of you and started teasing, calling Beomgyu a sissy for being so close to a girl or mocking him for even attempting to make up with you after what had transpired earlier today. He lowered both his head and his pinkie, feeling hurt by their comments. You wanted to do something, but you knew if you said anything that they would just tease him more. So, you walked off, deciding to leave him alone and wait for your mom somewhere else. That was the last time the two of you spoke.

You didn’t try to be his friend after that.

May 28th, 2011

I went to my first boy/girl party today. It started so late too. I showed up at 6 pm but the invitation said 5. My friends said it's better to be “fashionably late”, whatever that means. Beomgyu was there too, he smiled at me and I smiled back. My friends saw when this happened and they started squealing and making “ooh” sounds. That was annoying. Beomgyu and I aren’t even friends. The rest of the party was spent with everyone practically checking each other out, girls on one side of the room and boys on the other. We’re all ten now, I guess double digits means girls aren’t icky to boys anymore and the other way around. After all the craziness that happened at this first party, I've decided that I don't like parties. Even if boys will be there. (Even if Beomgyu will be there). Oh, and I had my first kiss tonight. (Almost had my second one too).

Today was an exciting day. A classmate was celebrating his tenth birthday and everyone was invited to the party. He promised it would be just like the ones we saw in movies. His parents would stay in their room, leaving us to have fun and play games until it was time to cut the cake. There would be pizza, video games, and lots of sweets for us to enjoy. He made sure to invite both boys and girls, and there were even rumors about kissing at the party. When you and your friends received your invitations, they suggested that you all go shopping together at the mall to find new outfits for the occasion.

After your dad picked you up from school that Friday, he dropped you off at the mall. A few of your friend's moms would be chaperoning your group as you all went shopping together. You spent most of the day wandering around the mall, trying on different clothes and listening to your friends giggle about boys. You didn't really care too much about boys or kissing, so you just listened to them, softly giggling and sometimes blushing at their words.

On the day of the party, you put on your new dress and met up with your friends in front of the birthday boy's house. As soon as you walked in, the sound of laughter and music filled your ears. The boys were playing video games on one side of the room while the girls huddled together in the opposite corner. You spotted Beomgyu across the room and he looked different somehow.

He wasn't wearing his usual clothes, and his hair was parted showing his forehead. You didn't know that boys could do that too. He was wearing a blue shirt with black jeans, and his hair was styled neatly to the side. You felt a strange stirring in your chest as your eyes met his, and you quickly looked away. When you met his gaze again, you greeted him with a smile, and he smiled back warmly. Your friends were quick to start making teasing comments, but you ignored them.

The two of you smiling at each other wasn't anything new. It was always a smile and wave when you two would see each other in school, as a form of acknowledgment. You always wondered if the two of you would be best friends if you decided to just ignore the stupid comments from your classmates when you were younger. There was no animosity between you, but it's not like the two of you talked aside from a simple hi or "you dropped this".

At some point during the night, a game of Truth or Dare began, and you found yourself sitting next to Beomgyu. The other players were daring each other to do ridiculous things like climb trees and sing at the top of their lungs.

"Beomgyu, truth or dare?" one of the boys asked, snapping you out of your thoughts and looking at him.

"Truth," he responded with a smile.

"Do you like anyone?"

All eyes turned to Beomgyu as he blushed and looked away.

"Maybe," he said shyly.

You felt your heart skip a beat as the other kids started teasing him. You didn't know why you were feeling like this, maybe it was because you were sitting so close to him and he looked so cute. The game quickly ended after that, and people started to break off into groups around the room, groups of boys and girls this time. You stayed with your friends and a few other boys, but your eyes kept wandering. You noticed how Beomgyu stood close to a girl and she would giggle and smile up at him. When this happened, the others standing with them started making “ooh” sounds and it made you feel uneasy in your stomach.

The cake was cut eventually, and the birthday boy decided he wanted to play another game. Everyone huddled around the middle of the room for a game of spin-the-bottle. You took your place in the circle awkwardly, not really wanting to participate but feeling like you had no choice at this point. The bottle spun around and landed on a girl who giggled loudly as she leaned in to kiss one of the boys in the circle. You watched as everyone took their turns, feeling more and more uncomfortable by the second. When it was Beomgyu's turn, he spun the bottle nervously, and it landed on you. You felt your heart race as he leaned in, his lips brushing against yours softly before pulling away. It was a quick peck, but it was enough to make your head spin.

After the game ended, you sat down on the couch, feeling flushed. Beomgyu sat down next to you, looking at you with concern.

"Are you okay?" he asked softly.

You nodded slowly, trying to process what just happened.

"I don't like parties," you blurted out suddenly.

Beomgyu looked at you quizzically. "Why not?"

"I don't know," you said honestly. "It's just...there's so much pressure to be someone else. To fit in or do things I'm not comfortable with."

You felt oddly comfortable with him right now though.

Beomgyu nodded slowly, fidgeting with the ends of his shirt.

"I feel the same way sometimes," he admitted.

You looked at him in surprise, wondering why he would feel that way when he seemed so popular.

"Why?" you questioned quietly.

"Because sometimes it feels like I have to be someone I'm not for them to like me," he said carefully.

"Sometimes I just want to be real and not care what anyone else thinks."

"And who is that?" you asked him, turning to fully face him now.

He looked at you confused and you just laughed.

“Who’s the real Beomgyu then?” you clarified.

Beomgyu just smiled at you, his eyes sparkling just like they always did.

“He’s someone a lot quieter and to himself. I’m not sure anyone would like the real Beomgyu,” he said softly and dropped his head.

“I would.”

The words slipped out of your mouth before you even realized what you were saying. Beomgyu looked up at you, surprise etched on his face. For a moment, neither of you spoke, just looking at each other in silence.

"Really?" Beomgyu finally asked, his voice barely above a whisper.

You nodded, feeling your heart race with adrenaline.

"Really," you repeated, a little more confident this time.

A small smile spread across Beomgyu's face, and before you knew it, he was leaning in to kiss you again. However, before your lips could touch, one of his friends called out for him. He gave you an apologetic look and you gave him a small smile in return, telling him to go. You were still flustered over the first kiss and there was about to be a second one.

September 6th, 2012

Today was the first day of middle school. I wasn’t nervous for the first day, even though it was a new school with new people. A lot of my friends from elementary school applied to the same school as me, so I knew some people. I was surprised to see Beomgyu and some of his friends though. I didn’t know he applied here too. I only found out because his locker is right next to mine and will be for the next three years. He was still a little shy and it was still cute. I met a lot of new people today and my friends said the boys in middle school were much cuter. They talked about who would look good with who in our little group and even I got curious. I heard things about eighth graders dating, but did sixth graders do that too? I won’t tell my friends, but Taehyun in my math class is cute, and really smart too. I saw Beomgyu with a girl today, they looked like they were flirting and I felt weird. Middle school is like a whole new world.

Today was the first day of middle school, your friends and you were now in the 6th grade and things were changing. You weren’t one to be nervous for the first day of school ever, but your friends were. You spent last night on a video call with them trying to help them decide on what to wear today. You didn’t understand why it mattered so much and they would reply with, “it's middle school (y/n).”

As you walked into school, you could hear the chatter of students and the sound of lockers slamming. But something caught your eye, someone you didn't expect to see here, Beomgyu. Your heart raced as you realized you would be seeing him every day for the next three years and at the fact that your locker was right next to his. Beomgyu caught your gaze and gave you that same small smile, the one he always did.

Returning his smile, you gave a small wave and pretended to fiddle with your locker, unsure of how to act in this situation.

"Hey, (y/n), do you remember me?" Beomgyu asked shyly.

"Of course I do Beomgyu, I didn't know you applied to this school," you replied softly, finding it adorable that he thought you’d forget about him so easily.

“It’s a good school and was the closest to home,” Beomgyu said, as he started to open his locker and put his books in.

You couldn’t help but steal glances at him, noticing how he changed since the last time you saw him at graduation. His hair was a little longer and he got taller. He was still pretty scrawny though. The bell rang shortly after and you both walked to your first class. Seeing that you two were walking in the same direction, Beomgyu started softly talking about his summer vacation and how he spent most of it playing video games. You nodded along, but your mind was elsewhere. He was still shy, you mentally noted, and it was even more endearing to you now. He waved to you when he got to his class and you smiled, not really sure of how else to respond, and kept walking.

When you finally arrived at your first class, you were relieved to see that some of your other friends from elementary school were in the same class as you. You greeted them with hugs and excitement, trying to push the awkwardness with Beomgyu aside. Throughout the day, you kept encountering him in the hallways and found out that you shared a few classes. Every time you'd see each other, you'd smile and wave, like the routine you developed in elementary school. It was familiar, in a comforting way, and the awkwardness you were feeling towards him started to dissipate as the day continued.

At lunch you saw him sitting with two new boys that didn't go to elementary school with you guys. You recognized them, since they were in a few of your classes too. Their names were Kang Taehyun and Huening Kai. Taehyun sat next to you in math, he had big, round, pretty eyes. Kai sat at your table in social studies and he was really friendly. His laugh was really loud but it made you want to laugh with him. Kai was animatedly talking about something with Taehyun, and Beomgyu had a hand resting on his cheek, a pen in the other hand writing something in a little book. You couldn’t help but wonder what it was that he was writing. When he noticed you, he gave you a small wave and went back to whatever he was writing, the small encounter causing you to blush for some reason. You shook your head slightly and looked around the cafeteria trying to spot any of your friends, going over to their table when you did. You pulled out your own little book and started to doodle, while listening to your friends gossip and talk about boys they thought were cute.

The rest of your day went by in a blur, nothing exciting happening since all your teachers basically did the same thing today. You walked to your locker when the last bell rang, stopping in your tracks when you saw Beomgyu at his. He wasn’t alone though, there was a girl next to him and she was leaning against your locker, twirling her hair a little too forcefully as they talked to each other. You recognized her, she went to elementary school with you and was fairly popular. You remembered all the boys in your class having a crush on her. You felt strange as you watched Beomgyu laugh with the girl, his hand resting on her arm. You decided to gather your things and just go home, not wanting to see whatever was happening between them.

“Excuse me,” you muttered softly, and she looked at you annoyed.

You pointed to your locker and she moved, quickly going back to giggling at Beomgyu, which caused you to roll your eyes. Beomgyu looked at you when he heard your voice and gave you a small smile, like he usually did, but it felt different this time. You managed to give him a tight smile before walking away and going home.

November 2nd, 2012

Today was my first school dance, it was a halloween dance. Halloween was on a wednesday this year, but they didn't think it was convenient to have the dance on a wednesday, so it was pushed to today. It was weird to dress up in a costume in November, but I suppose costume parties aren’t just for halloween. I dressed up as an angel. My friends seem to make a big deal about a lot of our first experiences, like today, they decided we should all get ready together and then show up to the dance together. When they first heard about the dance, they immediately thought we should try to get dates. Sometimes I wonder why I’m friends with them because our interests and the things we prioritize are so different. They kept their word and managed to get dates, I didn’t, because I didn’t even want to go in the first place. Even though I didn’t have a date to my first dance, someone did ask me to dance and their costume paired well with mine. It was sweet of them to ask. Beomgyu was there and he had a date. It was the same girl I saw him with that one day by our lockers, and almost everyday since then. Are they dating now? If they are, good for them. I don't care…

Today felt like it was dragging along. You felt like it was always like that on Friday’s, but today was especially slow and not just to you, but to everyone. Tonight was the Halloween Dance, and everyone’s anticipation and constant staring at the clock only seemed to make time move slower.

As the final bell rang, signaling the end of the school day, your classroom erupted with a chorus of relieved voices. Students rushed to their lockers, grabbing their bags and shoving any and all books into them with eager anticipation of the evening ahead. But as you made your way through the crowded hallway, a sinking feeling settled in your stomach. The excitement buzzing around you only served as a stark reminder of your own lack of enthusiasm for the dance. Parties and gatherings were not your thing, anyone that knew you, knew this. Yet, for some reason you had a costume picked out and waiting for you at home. Your friends made plans to meet up after school to get ready together, however you were left out of these plans and weren’t told until today. Your friends knew you had to tell your parents at least a day ahead before asking to go out. It felt like they didn’t want you to join them. After saying bye to your friends, you took the bus home. Your parents weren’t able to pick you up today, and luckily they taught you how to get home using public transportation in case this happened.

You got home shortly after, trudging up the stairs to your room. Slipping into your angel costume, you couldn't help but feel a sense of detachment from the festivities. Glittering wings adorned your back, and a halo perched lightly on your head, you looked at yourself in the mirror. You didn't recognize the person staring back at you. You felt like you were wearing a disguise, hiding behind the façade of an angel, when you felt anything but angelic. The heaviness in your chest and the weight of loneliness settled upon you, casting a deeper shadow over your already lack of excitement. You wondered if this was really worth it, the discomfort of pretending to enjoy a party you had no interest in attending. You were going because your friends were, and they said you had to be there. With a sigh, you decided to make the best of the situation. Maybe tonight would surprise you, and you'd find some hidden enjoyment somewhere in the midst of your stagnant melancholy.

The evening air was cool as you stepped out of your house and made your way towards the house your friends agreed to meet up at. The moon hung low in the sky, casting an eerie glow on the deserted streets. Halloween decorations still adorned houses, their flickering lights and grinning jack-o'-lanterns showing more of an expression than you were. It was a stark contrast to the emptiness of the night, and you couldn't help but feel a sense of foreboding.

You arrived at your friends' house, the designated meeting spot for the evening. As you walked up to the front door, you could hear the faint sound of laughter and music echoing through the walls. Taking a deep breath, you knocked once and pushed open the door. The living room was transformed into a makeshift dressing room, with clothes and makeup strewn about all over the room. Your friends were gathered around a full-length mirror, each one meticulously perfecting their costumes. They didn't seem to notice your arrival at first, too engrossed in their own reflections. You stood there awkwardly, feeling like an outsider in your own group. It was moments like these when you questioned your friendship with them. Their shared enthusiasm and excitement for the dance seemed foreign to you, and you couldn't help but wonder if it was your fault for not fully embracing their interests or if they were to blame for excluding you from their plans. None of them made the effort to acknowledge your presence. The realization hit you like a punch to the gut; they didn't really care if you were there or not. You were just an afterthought, someone they had to invite out of obligation.

“(y/n)! You’re here! When did you come in?” One of them asked, still not looking directly at you, snapping you out of your thoughts and shooting them a forced smile.

“I just got here,” you said quietly and looked down.

That wasn't true, you had to have been standing there for at least five minutes. But you didn't want to make a big deal out of it. You didn't want to draw attention to your own insecurities and feelings of exclusion. So, you brushed it off and joined them in front of the mirror. As you joined your friends in front of the mirror, they finally turned their attention towards you, their eyes widening in surprise as they took in your angelic appearance. A mixture of awe and excitement filled their faces, momentarily putting your doubts at bay. They complimented your costume and eagerly asked how you managed to look so ethereal. It felt good to be noticed, even if it was just for your outfit. Part of you felt like they were only being half-hearted in their words, but a compliment was a compliment and it made you feel good nonetheless.

As the group finished getting ready, you all made your way to the school. You walked slightly behind the group and just listened to their chatter like you always did. They talked about how they couldn’t wait to slow dance with their dates and potentially kiss them. Your group arrived at the school after a short walk and the moment you stepped through the doors, the atmosphere consumed you. The gymnasium had been transformed into a haunted castle and it looked better than you thought it would. The dim lighting and haunting decorations created an eerie but magical ambiance. The chattering of students and the thumping bass of the music reverberated through the air. You scanned the crowd, searching for familiar faces amidst the sea of costumes.

Your friends quickly dispersed, finding their dates or joining other groups. Left standing alone, you hesitated, unsure of where to go or what to do. So you took a seat on the bleachers, just sitting and observing the scene in front of you. You sat there for a majority of the evening, only getting up occasionally to get something to drink or accompany one of your friends to the bathroom. Since it was a school dance, there were sixth, seventh and eighth graders there. It was easy to tell who was who. The eighth graders tried to carry an air of maturity and do things they thought would make them look cool in front of the underclassmen. The seventh graders mostly kept to themselves, trying not to be awkward, yet they still looked more comfortable than you did here. And then there were the sixth graders. They were all buzzing with excitement, making a dramatic spectacle of every song that played, every “couple” that came together. They were still divided, with girls in one corner and boys in another, despite most of them having dates. Right then, the melodic tunes of a slow romantic song washed over the gymnasium, beckoning couples to take each other's hands and attempt to sway in harmony. It was then that you noticed Beomgyu standing across the room, his eyes locked on his date. She was absolutely stunning in her costume, and you watched as he took her hands awkwardly and they started to slow dance. You felt a pang of envy wash over you, but you weren’t sure what you wanted. Did you want someone to dance with you like that? Did you wish you were as pretty as she was? Did you want to just go home? Did you want Beomgyu to- You tore your gaze away from them, a feeling of loneliness settled deep within you once more. But just as you were about to descend further into your isolation and self-doubt, you felt a tap on your shoulder. Surprised, you turned your head to find Taehyun, one of Beomgyu’s friends, and one of the cutest boys in the sixth grade, standing in front of you with a shy smile on his face.

"Hey," he said softly. "Would you like to dance?"

You looked up at him, and saw that he was wearing a pair of devil horns on his head, his big warm eyes looking at you with genuine kindness.

“M-me?” You stammered, taken aback by his unexpected invitation.

Taehyun nodded, his smile widening as he held out his hand for you to take. A mix of surprise and anticipation swelled within you, and you hesitated for a moment before placing your trembling hand in his.

"Yeah," you replied, your voice barely above a whisper. "I'd like to dance."

As Taehyun led you towards the dance floor, a rush of nervous excitement coursed through your veins. You could feel the eyes of the other students on you, curious and intrigued by the two of you together. One of your friends drew your attention and she shot you a “you go girl” look, which caused you to blush and turn your attention back to Taehyun.

"I'm surprised you came here alone," Taehyun said and gently placed his hands at your waist.

He was a natural.

"What do you mean?" you asked shyly and put your hands on his shoulders, keeping your gaze glued to the floor.

"Well, I've been watching you sit here all night, and it just didn't seem right for someone as pretty as you to be alone," he replied confidently and started to sway the two of you to the music.

His words caught you off guard and you blushed at the compliment. His words were simple, but they seemed to hold a sincerity that made you feel seen and appreciated.

“Did you come here alone?” you asked him, finally looking up to meet his eyes.

“I did,” he said and laughed, his hands were holding you as gently as he could.

You were visibly surprised at his response, Taehyun was popular, smart and extremely cute. You thought he’d get asked a number of times, or at least ask someone, who would no doubt say yes.

You heard him laugh again, “Is that really that surprising?”

You nodded.

“I should've asked you.”

“Well if you did, I would have said yes.”

“Our costumes even go together, it was meant to be,” he jokes and you giggled as he attempted to twirl you.

The song came to an end and you thanked him for the dance, quickly being pulled away by your friends for the first time that evening. Out of the corner of your eye, you saw Taehyun retreat back to his friends and one of them kept their eyes on you.

Beomgyu.

January 3rd, 2015

You were late today. I heard Kai and Taehyun talking about whether or not you’d show up. I kept looking at your locker, as if you’d just magically appear. This was a small thing that I looked forward to each day. Our little interactions at our lockers. It’s usually a small smile or a soft “good morning” but I really looked forward to it. It hasn’t really been happening since you’ve been hanging out with her more though.

January 3rd, 2015

I heard them. They were talking about you. The girl you like I mean, she and her friends were talking about you. Usually, one would be happy by this. Even outsiders would be thrilled witnessing love. However, this wasn’t very thrilling. She was making fun of you and your feelings. She knew you’d fall at her feet and wanted to play with you for fun. She has been playing with you for fun since we started middle school. For some reason that tugged at my heart.

January 3rd, 2015

You did end up coming today, but you didn't look anyone in the eye. Not even your friends. I saw you though, at your locker. Your eyes were red and they looked empty, like someone pulled the rug from right under you and there was no sparkle.

You couldn't help but feel a pang of worry as you watched him from across the hallway. Curiosity drew you closer, your footsteps light and cautious. You didn't want to intrude on his solitude, but you also couldn't bear to see him suffer in silence either. With hesitant steps, you approached his locker, unsure of what to say or do.

“Beomgyu?” you called out to him softly.

He turned to face you, but still didn’t meet your gaze, though you knew he was listening.

“Here,” you said and gently placed something in his hands.

It was a bag of gummy bears.

You watched the way his eyes widened slightly and he looked up for what was probably the first time today.

“I didn’t realize that I bought two, and I know these have been your favorite since we were kids, so I’d like you to have them.”

His fingers gently gripped the bag in his hands and his eyes squeezed shut. When he opened them and looked at you again, you saw the sparkle. It wasn’t as bright as it usually was, but it was there, slowly flickering back to life.

“You remember that?” he asked, the surprise clear in his voice.

“I do,” you confirmed.

“Why are you nervous right now?” he questioned, his voice as soft as ever.

“H-how do you know that I’m nervous?” you stammered, tugging slightly at a strand of your hair.

“You’re doing that thing with your hair. You’ve done that since we were kids.”

It was now your turn to be surprised.

You giggled softly, slightly embarrassed with a mix of relief and amusement bubbling up inside you.

"I guess some things never change, huh?" you replied, tucking the strand of hair behind your ear.

It was true, whenever you felt nervous or uncertain, you had a habit of fiddling with your hair. Beomgyu's lips twitched into a small smile, faint but genuine. The tension that had been shrouding him seemed to dissipate ever so slightly.

"Yeah," he murmured, his voice still tinged with sadness.

"Some things stay the same," he said and looked down again, this time fiddling with the bag of gummy bears.

He tore it open and held it out to you. A smile spread across your face, warmed by the small gesture. You reached out and took a gummy bear from the bag, popping it into your mouth. The two of you stood there in silence, chewing on the gummies and just looking at each other with shining eyes.

It was a simple moment, but it held a weight that words couldn't capture for both of you. At this time, Taehyun rounded the corner, a very familiar little black book in his hands and a small smirk adorned on his face. But when he saw the two of you, his smirk turned into a wide smile and he let you be.

He’ll give Beomgyu his book back some other time.

September 8th, 2015

Today is the last day of summer vacation. I’d be starting high school tomorrow, and I was really looking forward to how the changes over the summer would transfer into the school year. A lot changed. Like a lot. Mostly good changes. I think I have real, genuine, friends now. But I’m afraid that my old group of “friends” will try to torment me throughout our high school years. I realized a lot of things about myself over the summer too. I can feel my face getting hot recalling them as I’m writing this.

A lot had happened over the summer. A lot had changed. Your supposed friends had decided you would only bring them down, and despite them wanting a dramatic parting of your years of friendship, it ended quietly and expectedly. You weren’t hurt, and that seemed to bother them. You hung out with Taehyun a lot over the summer, Kai joining you two often. You found that you shared a lot in common with them, it was easy to get along with them and you never had to force yourself to go along with their plans. You learned that’s what friendship should feel like.

Beomgyu would sometimes join you, his presence a comforting and familiar one. He seemed to carry a weight on his shoulders and you couldn't help but feel a sense of empathy towards him, especially after knowing that he had fallen for someone who didn't appreciate him. It was also strange how the two of you always seemed to show up around each other at just the right time, as if drawn together by some unseen force.

There was an instance where some random guy had been following you around on one of your evening walks and Beomgyu showed up then, catching on to the situation, pretending as if he’d been waiting for you. There was another time when you felt like having ice cream and when you went out to get some, you found Beomgyu walking out of the convenience store holding one of those ice creams with two sticks that you could split in half. He gave you the other half and joined you on your evening walk that night. You tried to brush them off as mere coincidences, but deep down, you knew there was something more at play.

After the “gummy bear incident”, as you like to refer to it as, there has been a subtle shift in your dynamic. Your interactions were never lacking in chemistry or politeness before, even with both of you being naturally shy individuals. But now, whenever the two of you found yourselves alone, neither of you could barely get a word out without stumbling over your words. Eye contact was practically non-existent between the two of you now, the air thick with unspoken tension and unfulfilled desires. The summer had brought you closer, yet somehow he still felt far away. And although you were hesitant to admit it out loud, your feelings for him had grown stronger with each passing day.

You liked him.

You’ve always liked Choi Beomgyu.

September 9th, 2015

Today was the first day of high school. You and I are attending the same school again. You look really different now. Even though I saw it gradually happen over the summer, I’m pretty sure I spent most of today just looking at you. How tall you got, how deep your voice is now. Taehyun said you had a crush on someone, and it's good that you feel okay enough to feel like that about somone again I guess. I also met two new boys today, and we got along well. I'm looking forward to getting to know them.

As you entered the bustling hallways, sleek and gleaming under the bright fluorescent lights, you couldn't help but get lost in the sea of faces. There were whispers of excitement and trepidation that filled the air. Today was the first day of high school, a milestone that held both promise and uncertainty. You could feel the nervous energy radiating off the other freshmen as they hurried to find their lockers and compare schedules with friends that joined them from middle school. Taking a deep breath, you tried to steady your own racing heart, reminding yourself that everyone else most likely felt the same way you were feeling.

As you navigated through the maze of lockers, you caught snippets of conversations. Excited chatter about summer adventures, worries about making new friends, and anxious whispers about the infamous teachers they were told to look out for. You saw a few familiar faces, including your former friends. Before any sort of interaction could happen between you, someone's frantic waving caught your attention. You sighed in relief seeing that it was Taehyun, and he was frantically waving at you to call you over.

Grateful for the familiar, friendly face, you quickened your pace and made your way towards Taehyun. He was leaning against a row of lockers, his hair falling into his eyes as he scanned the crowd. As soon as he saw you approach, a wide grin spread across his face.

"Hey, you're finally here!" Taehyun exclaimed, his voice filled with genuine relief.

"Yeah," you replied with a nervous laugh.

"Just trying to figure out where everything is."

Taehyun chuckled, brushing his hair back with a casual flick of his hand.

"Don't worry, I've got it all figured out," he boasted playfully.

"I'm sure you do," you laughed and looked around.

"Where's Kai?"

"He's at his locker, did you find where yours is yet?" Taehyun asked, leaning closer to look at the schedule in your hands.

"No, I haven't. Want to help me find it since you got it "all figured out"?"

Taehyun grinned and nodded, tucking his hands into his pockets as he fell into stride beside you. Together, you weaved through the bustling crowd of students, scanning the numbers on lockers until you finally found the one that matched the number on your schedule. With a sigh of relief, you spun the combination lock and swung open the metal door.

As you began to organize your books and supplies, Taehyun leaned against the locker next to yours, observing you with a twinkle in his eyes.

"So," he began, "nervous about any particular classes?"

"Not really."

"Are you going to join any clubs or teams here?" he asked, though you could tell his attention was now somewhere else.

You were going to look up and jokingly ask why he wasn’t paying you any attention, but instead your heart started to beat really fast. Across the hall was Beomgyu, standing at his locker and you're only now noticing that Taehyun left your side to approach him. You watched as Taehyun sauntered over to Beomgyu with a mischievous glint in his eye. The two of them exchanged a few words, their conversation drowned out by the surrounding chatter. Beomgyu looked surprised at first but then broke into a shy smile, nodding in agreement to whatever Taehyun had asked him. The sight of both of them approaching you snapped you out of your daze and you quickly went back to organizing your things.

“Hey,” Beomgyu greeted you softly.

“Hi,” you slightly blushed, voice just as soft.

Watching this, Taehyun couldn't help but snicker because of what he knew. Taehyun stepped closer, now joining you and Beomgyu, his chuckles escaping his lips. You glanced at him with a raised eyebrow, curiosity tugging at your thoughts.

"What's so funny?" you questioned, tilting your head to the side.

"Oh, nothing," Taehyun replied coyly, a mischievous glimmer still lingering in his eyes.

"Just enjoying the sight in front of me."

Your cheeks flushed a deeper shade of pink as you exchanged a look with Beomgyu.

"What are you going on about?" you asked cautiously, trying to hide your flustered state.

Taehyun chuckled again, nudging Beomgyu playfully.

"Well, it just so happens that Beomgyu here has a little crush on someone," he teased, winking at Beomgyu.

Beomgyu's face turned several shades of red, and he shot Taehyun a playful glare. Your eyes widened slightly at Taehyun's words and you casted your eyes down to the floor, the only thing on your mind now was a simple question:

Again?

With a shy smile, Beomgyu glanced at you before turning his attention back to Taehyun.

"Hey, don't go spreading rumors," he mumbled, trying to hide the blush creeping up his cheeks.

Taehyun chuckled, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Who said anything about rumors? I'm just stating the truth." He grinned mischievously, clearly enjoying the reaction he was getting from both of you.

Taehyun looked at you and smirked.

"You see, he's got this little black notebook and-" he was cut off by Beomgyu practically pouncing on him and covering his mouth shut.

You couldn't help but laugh at the sight of Beomgyu trying to silence Taehyun. It was clear that there was more to this story than Taehyun was able to say. You glanced between the two of them, biting your lip to supress your laugh.

"What's in the black notebook, Beomgyu?" you finally asked, a genuine glimmer of curiosity in your eyes.

Beomgyu's face turned an even deeper shade of red as he released his hold on Taehyun, who immediately took the opportunity to tease him further.

"Oh, just a little collection of poems and doodles," Taehyun said with a smirk.

"They aren't poems," Beomgyu mumbled, looking down now.

"They're just silly scribbles," Beomgyu continued, his voice barely above a whisper.

His embarrassment was palpable, and there was a hint of vulnerability in his eyes. With a gentle smile, and a small burst of confidence, you took a step closer to him and reached out to touch his arm.

"I have a little black notebook too," you said, hoping to lessen any embarrassment he was feeling.

Beomgyu's eyes widened in surprise as he looked at you, his blush fading slightly.

"Really?" he asked, his voice filled with both excitement and curiosity.

You nodded, your own embarrassment now surfacing.

"Yeah," you replied softly.

"Yeah, and it's my diary that's practically filled with love letters I can't send to you," you thought to yourself.

Before any more words could be exchanged, Kai approached you guys with a loud "hey" and the four of you started to compare schedules. You looked to Beomgyu one more time, finding that he was already looking at you, and you both looked away blushing yet again. Taehyun only shook his head in amusement and continued to point out the classes you all shared together.

The rest of the day went by quickly, and as the final bell signaling the end of the school day rang, you found yourself walking alongside Beomgyu towards the exit. The air was filled with a comfortable silence, a warmth settling between you two.

"I can't believe Taehyun spilled the beans like that," Beomgyu muttered, shaking his head in disbelief.

You giggled softly, feeling a surge of contentment wash over you.

"Well, at least now I know I'm not the only one with secrets."

You two found Taehyun and Kai outside by the school's entrance, along with two other boys you've never seen before. As you approached the group, you squinted your eyes, trying to get a better look as if that would help you recognize them. One of them, with his tall stature and warm smile, extended a hand towards you in greeting.

"Hi there," he said, his voice friendly and inviting.

"I'm Soobin. It's nice to meet you."

You shook his hand, returning his smile with one of your own.

"Nice to meet you too, Soobin. I'm (Y/N)."

The other boy, on the other hand, had an air of confidence about him. His dark hair was styled effortlessly and his gaze, though piercing, was still inviting and held a hint of mischief.

"Hey, (Y/N). I'm Yeonjun, nice to meet you." he introduced, giving you a charming smile.

You nodded in acknowledgement, feeling the spark of curiosity ignite within you. There was something magnetic about these two new faces, something that made you want to know them better. After the small introduction, you waved your friends goodbye and made your way home, looking forward to the next day and the rest of your years at this school.

February 14th, 2017

Today was Valentine’s Day. I wanted to mark this as a milestone. Although it’s not the first Valentine’s Day after I acknowledged my feelings for you, it’s the first one where I acknowledged them and have money of my own to buy you a present. Did I do that? Of course not. But something else happened, something better. I think you’d agree. I also think we were set up, which reminds me that I have to thank Taehyun and Yeonjun tomorrow.

February 14th, Valentine’s Day. You never really understood the point of the holiday. Never understanding why a day needed to be dedicated to love. You thought love should be expressed everyday, through big or small gestures. In elementary school, it seemed like another excuse to be able to eat candy and chocolate, which you didn’t mind at all. In middle school, people started to use the day as an opportunity to confess, that way if rejected they could play it off as an obligatory present. In high school, it seemed more serious. People planned to confess with the intentions of a relationship, not like in middle school where you would confess just to get it over with. As you walked down the halls of your high school, you took notice of the flurry of red and pink decorations adorning lockers, walls, and even the ceiling. Couples exchanged heartfelt gifts and whispered sweet nothings to each other, while others eagerly awaited their own moment to confess their feelings. Shaking your head, you made your way to your locker, finding Beomgyu at his.

"Beomgyu, good morning," you called out to him, your voice small and cheeks getting warm from the sight of him.

He turned slightly and gave you a sweet smile in acknowledgement.

"Good morning," Beomgyu replied, his eyes sparkling with warmth. He closed his locker and leaned against it as he looked at you.

"Happy Valentine's Day."

You couldn't help but blush deeper at his words, feeling a mix of excitement and nervousness bubbling inside you.

"Happy Valentine's Day to you too," you replied, mustering up all the courage you had.

Beomgyu chuckled softly, his eyes crinkling at the corners in a way that made your heart flutter.

"Do you have any plans for today?" he asked, tilting his head slightly.

The tilt of his head caused his hair to fall into his eyes, and without thinking, you reached out and brushed his hair out of his face. Beomgyu's eyes widened slightly at your touch, his cheeks turning a faint shade of pink. He seemed momentarily taken aback before a smile slowly graced his lips.

"Thanks," he murmured, his voice barely above a whisper.

The way he looked at you, with such gentle adoration, made your heart skip a beat.

"I'm sorry, I don't know why I did that. I wasn't thinking," you stammered, your face burning with embarrassment.

Beomgyu shook his head, still smiling softly.

"Don't apologize," he said, his voice gentle and reassuring.

"I liked it."

Your face flushed even deeper at his words, but a shy smile tugged at the corners of your lips. As the two of you stood there, caught in a moment of unspoken connection, the sound of laughter and chatter echoed down the hallway. You both turned to see Taehyun and Yeonjun approaching, their faces bright. Taehyun had a mischievous grin playing on his lips, while Yeonjun had a glint of excitement in his eyes.

"Hey, lovebirds!" Taehyun called out with a teasing grin.

"Did we interrupt something?"

You felt your face grow even hotter, embarrassed by the attention, but Beomgyu's presence beside you gave you a sense of comfort.

Yeonjun nudged Taehyun playfully.

"Leave them alone, Tae. Can't you see they're having a moment?"

Beomgyu chuckled softly, shaking his head.

"It's fine, guys. We were just talking."

You immediately nodded in agreement.

“Right, can’t two friends just talk?”

You can tell that neither of them were convinced, but they decided to drop the teasing and turn their attention to their own plans for the day. Apparently all six of us were going to hang out after school, since none of us have a Valentine. Soobin, being as boyfriend coded as he is, thought it would be hilarious to plan something sickeningly sweet for us all to do after school. Taehyun, Yeonjun, and Kai were all on board with the idea, finding it both humorous and enjoyable. They offered to handle the arrangements.

After that, the rest of the day seemed to stretch on endlessly. You witnessed numerous confessions, with some leading to a positive outcome and others resulting in unnecessarily harsh rejection. By your lunch period, you saw your friends walk into the cafeteria holding multiple boxes of chocolates. You weren't surprised in the slightest, they were all incredibly charming and attractive.

As you and Kai walked to your next class after lunch, he explained that both he and Taehyun couldn't make it to the group's afternoon plans. When you asked for a reason, all he said was "something came up". You didn't press any further, even though you were confused, but you figured that Kai had his own reasons for keeping things vague.

When the final bell rang, signaling the end of the school day, you found yourself walking alongside Beomgyu towards the designated meeting spot. The meeting spot was a quaint little café tucked away in a quiet corner of town. The air was filled with the aroma of freshly brewed coffee, and soft jazz music played in the background, creating a cozy ambiance. You looked around for any sight of Yeonjun or Soobin, and saw Beomgyu doing the same. But to your surprise, neither Yeonjun nor Soobin were there. You exchanged a confused glance with Beomgyu, wondering where they could be.

"I thought they would be here already," Beomgyu said, furrowing his brows.

"Maybe they got caught up with something."

"They'll probably show up soon. Let's just grab a table and wait for them."

Beomgyu smiled at you gratefully, the corners of his lips lifting up. Your heart started to race at the sight, and you couldn't help but return the smile, feeling a warm sense of comfort settle in your chest. You found a small table near the window, and Beomgyu pulled out a chair for you, his gestures filled with a gentle tenderness. As you settled into your seats, the anticipation of the afternoon plans mixed with a hint of uncertainty lingered in the air. You glanced at Beomgyu, who was lost in his own thoughts, a faint furrow still etched on his forehead. He pulled out his little black notebook and started to scribble. A soft smile played on your lips as you watched him, and you recalled that he was writing in the book earlier today too.

Curiosity getting the best of you, you leaned in a bit closer, trying to catch a glimpse of what Beomgyu was writing. However, as if sensing your prying eyes, he quickly closed the notebook and looked up at you with a grin.

"Oh, so you're interested in my little secrets now?" he teased, playfully raising an eyebrow.

You blushed and shook your head, feeling a mix of embarrassment and intrigue.

"I was just curious. You wrote in that book a lot today."

Beomgyu's smile softened, and he slid the notebook back into his backpack. Before he could respond, the sound of an incoming text notification went off and you picked up your phone.

"it's from Yeonjun," you announced, reading the message quietly to yourself.

You frowned slightly, disappointed that Yeonjun wouldn't be joining you. But the text message left you with more questions than answers. What could be so urgent that he couldn't even explain? And why did he add that playful winking emoji at the end?

Beomgyu, who had been waiting for your response, leaned in to catch a glimpse of the message. His brows furrowed, mirroring your own confusion.

"That's strange," he murmured.

"Yeonjun usually doesn't leave things so vague."

Then, another notification came in, Beomgyu picking up his phone this time.

"It's Soobin," Beomgyu read, his eyes narrowing as he read the message. He let out a soft chuckle and shook his head.

"What is it?" you asked, leaning closer to see the message on his phone.

You exchanged a bewildered look with Beomgyu, the pieces of the puzzle not quite fitting together. It was too much of a coincidence that at this point, you didn't believe that any of this was a coincidence. You were starting to feel like you and Beomgyu were being set up. The sound of another text coming in on Beomgyu's phone brought you back to the present. Beomgyu glanced at his phone and his eyes widened in surprise, a faint pink now dusting his cheeks. Sitting up a little straighter, he cleared his throat and looked at you.

"Should we just go home...?"

His voice trailed off as if he didn't want to ask the question.

“I-I mean, we’re already here. But they never exactly said what we’d be doing so..” you stammered over your words, not expecting him to ask that.

Did he want to leave?

Beomgyu sighed, his shoulders slumping slightly as if he was trying to make himself smaller out of nervousness.

"Are you okay with it being just the two of us?" he asked, his voice tinged with a mix of nervousness and hope.

"I think we can still have a great time together," he added, mustering a small smile.

Your heart started beating faster at his words, the warmth in his eyes reflecting the genuine desire for your company. You found yourself nodding, unable to form words as you simply smiled at him. Beomgyu's face brightened at your response, a genuine grin spreading across his features. He stood up from his seat and you followed, both of you walking out of the cafe.

“Is there anywhere specific you want to go?”

He asked as he checked his phone.

“I’m okay with anything really. Just walking around like this is nice too.”

He gave a slight nod and put his phone in his pocket, “how about an arcade? There’s one nearby.”

Your eyes lit up and you nodded, “I love arcades. I haven’t been to one in a long time.”

Beomgyu smiled, looking at you, “was the last time when we went to one in fifth grade? For that school trip?”

“Yeah, it was then. I think I spent all the money I got on the claw machines,” you said with a small laugh as you recalled the trip.

“The claw machines are probably my favorite.”

“You know…” Beomgyu started, “I’m known as the king of claws,” he said with as playful smirk.

“Is that so? I’ll have to see it to believe it,” you replied giggling.

You arrived at the arcade shortly after and he did prove it. His first try, he won a small teddy bear. You watched as he kneeled down to retrieve his prize, then stood up and handed it to you.

“Believe me now?” He asked with a grin, running a hand through his hair.

You gently took the teddy bear and hugged it to your chest.

“I think you got lucky,” you teased, even though you did believe him.

He raised an eyebrow as if to say “oh yeah?” and tried a different one. This time he won a prize in two tries, retrieving it and turning around with his arms crossed. You bit back a laugh and clutched the teddy bear in your hands a little tighter.

“Okay, I digress. You’re the king of claws,” you admitted to fuel his already growing ego, and just to see him feel good about himself.

He grinned, satisfied with your words and then brushed the imaginary dust off his shoulders.

“I was only teasing you know, I believed you from the start,” you said softly, adjusting your backpack on your back.

“I know, I was playing along and trying to impress you,” he mumbled, suddenly feeling shy.

You blushed at his confession, feeling a warmth spreading through your chest. Beomgyu's vulnerability and effort to impress you made your heart flutter. You reached out and gently nudged his arm with your elbow.

"Well, you succeeded," you said, your voice filled with sincerity.

Beomgyu's cheeks flushed a deeper shade of pink, and he couldn't hide the bashful smile that tugged at his lips.

You kept wandering through the arcade, trying out different games and amassing more tickets. Rather than exchanging them for prizes, you opted to give them to a group of young children also enjoying the arcade. You didn't want to carry all your winnings and your backpacks, it would have been too exhausting. It was also nice to see the way their eyes lit up when you gave them the tickets. You made sure to hold onto the teddy bear Beomgyu won for you when you first got there though.

As the afternoon turned into evening, you and Beomgyu decided to leave the arcade. The two of you walked side by side on the bustling streets, occasionally bumping into each other playfully. There was a comfortable silence between you, no need for constant conversation. It was enough just to be in each other's presence. Beomgyu checked his phone and suggested finding someplace to have dinner. You nodded in agreement, your stomach rumbling in anticipation. Together, you searched for a nearby restaurant, eager to continue the enjoyable day you were having.

As luck would have it, you stumbled upon a cozy little diner with the inviting aroma of comfort food wafting through the air. You entered the diner and were immediately greeted by the friendly chatter of other diners and the clinking of cutlery against plates. Beomgyu led the way to a booth near the window, and you slid in across from him. After scanning the menu, you glanced at the teddy bear that you put to sit neatly on the table.

"Has anyone ever told you that you look like a teddy bear?" you asked him suddenly.

He chuckled softly, reaching across the table to playfully poke the teddy bear's nose.

"Well no, no one has ever compared me to a teddy bear before," he replied, his voice tinged with amusement.

"But I guess I can see why you'd say that. Is it because of my fluffy hair?"

"Your hair is part of it," you started to say, but stopped and wondered if you should continue.

You thought for a moment, considering whether to share your feelings with Beomgyu. Not confess to him, you weren't ready for that. You looked into Beomgyu's eyes and found comfort and reassurance staring back at you. Encouraged by his presence, you decided to open up.

"Actually, it's not just your hair," you confessed, your voice filled with a mix of nervousness and sincerity.

"It's more about how being around you makes me feel. You have this warmth and kindness that reminds me of a teddy bear. Whenever I'm with you, it's like being wrapped in a comforting embrace."

Beomgyu leaned back against the booth and looked at you, his eyes filled with warmth and affection. A soft smile graced his lips as he took in your words, and you could see the genuine joy sparkling in his eyes.

"Thank you," he said, his voice soft.

"That's honestly one of the sweetest things anyone has ever said to me."

"You know," he continued, his smile growing wider, "I feel the same way about you. Whenever I'm with you, it feels like all the worries and troubles disappear, and I'm just surrounded by this incredible sense of happiness and comfort."

"I wonder if it would've been like this still, if we decided to ignore those stupid boys when we were six," he mused aloud, a sense of nostalgia now surrounding your booth.

You chuckled softly, reminiscing on the memory of the day you first met and the day after.

"I'm surprised you remember that. I only left you alone so they would stop calling you those mean names," you said, fondness in your voice.

"I didn't like seeing you so disheartened and I thought that was the best thing to do," you explained, a hint of sheepishness coloring your cheeks.

"You were really considerate for being six years old," he replied, a wistful smile playing on his lips.

The waitress approached your table, interrupting your conversation as she took your orders. As you waited for your food to arrive, you found yourselves lost in each other's company, talking about everything and nothing at all. When your food arrived and you dug into your meals, savoring the taste and coninuing to enjoy each other's presence. The diner was filled with a comforting ambiance, the soft buzz of conversation and the clinking of cutlery providing a soothing soundtrack to your moment together.

You excused yourself to the restroom and came back to find that Beomgyu already paid for both of you. He stood up upon your return and you left the diner.

The night air was cool against your skin as you continued your stroll down the streets. The city lights illuminated the path ahead, casting a warm glow over everything. You looked up at Beomgyu and found him checking his phone again.

"Is everything okay?" you asked, noticing the slight furrow of his brows as he scrolled through his phone.

"Yeah, it's nothing," Beomgyu replied, slipping his phone back into his pocket.

"Do you still go on those evening walks?" he asked in a clear attempt to change the subject.

You smiled at the question, recalling the habit you had developed long ago.

"Yes, I do," you replied.

"I find them quite calming, especially after a busy day. It's a chance to clear my mind and appreciate the beauty of the world around me."

"Then, would you like to take a walk now? Before we go home?" he asked, a hopeful gleam in his eyes.

You nodded, feeling a surge of excitement coursing through you. You didn't want whatever this was to end just yet, and his question allowed you to believe that he didn't either. You walked side by side, not really following a specific path. As you strolled through the city streets, the sound of your footsteps harmonized with the rhythm of your conversation, a sense of serenity enveloping you both. The bustling chaos of the city seemed to fade into the background as you wandered aimlessly, and soon the two of you found yourselves in a small park.

The park was mostly empty, save for a few older couples scattered on benches. You noticed a beautiful gazebo standing gracefully in the distance. You immediately walked towards the gazebo, Beomgyu following closely behind. The moonlight filtered through the intricate ironwork of the structure, casting delicate shadows on the ground below and you stood there for a while, Beomgyu right by your side, taking in the scene before you and looking up at the moon. The night was getting darker, and both of you had to wake up early for school the following day.

"Should we get going now?" you asked, glancing at Beomgyu.

"Yeah, we probably should," he replied softly.

As you started to leave the park, Beomgyu kindly offered to walk you home. You accepted with a grateful nod and a gentle smile, walking in the direction of your house together.

You watched as he checked his phone once again, his eyes widening and he shook his head slightly, as if in disbelief of what he read.

"Are you sure everything is okay?" you asked, concern lacing your voice.

"Y-yeah, everything is good," he said, his voice tinged with nervousness. He slipped his phone back into his pocket and took a deep breath, trying to compose himself.

"If you say so, it's just- you've been checking your phone since we left the cafe," you pointed out.

"I promise, it's nothing to worry about. I was just checking something," he assured, and you believed him for now.

Little did you know, he'd been checking a list Soobin had sent him of all the things they were supposed to do after school, though he thinks they altered it. He knows for sure they altered it. Still, he made sure to do all of them (he didn’t feed you though, he’d blush too much trying to).

Except for the fourth thing, it wasn't time yet.

March 13th, 2017

Today’s your birthday, your 16th birthday to be more specific. I was the first of our friends to turn 16, then Taehyun, and I think Yeonjun made turning 16 a bigger deal than it is. Though, it was nice to see you excited for your birthday. I hope your excitement is still as big today. I debated a lot on what to get you, or if I should even get you something at all. In the end I did, the beaded bracelet on my wrist that you got me for my birthday, gave me an idea. I really hope you like it. If I had the courage, this is how I would give it to you: I imagine going on a walk with you. Planned this time. Either under the moonlight or early in the morning. Taking in the fresh, crisp air and getting a chance to breathe. I’d listen attentively and answer all your questions wholeheartedly, and ask you some of my own. You’d surprise me by bringing up something I thought was too minuscule to remember and then you’d probably let out that precious giggle, followed by that pretty smile. It would quickly be replaced by your own surprise because I would bring something up about you too, and let out a small giggle of my own. It would feel like we were away from the real world for a while, surrounded by warmth and magic- cause that’s what you’re made of in my eyes. Then we’d stop somewhere, maybe by the Han River or the park we went to on Valentine’s Day and that’s where I’d give you my present. However, I wouldn’t be able to do this, so I’ll have to settle for lamely giving it to you when I see you in school.

Today was the warmest day of the week, and your nervousness was making you feel even warmer. The bracelets on your arm jingled and clinked as you nervously fiddled with them, the sound catching the attention of your friends. Yeonjun and Kai noticed your anxiousness and playfully teased you for it as you walked through the school hallway. Their laughter only fueled your nerves, and you blushed, desperately trying to hide your embarrassment.

"Come on, it's just a birthday present," Kai said with a grin.

"Yeah, don't be so nervous," Yeonjun added, nudging you playfully.

"I'm sure he'll love it."

You managed a weak smile, grateful for their support. Deep down though, you couldn't help but doubt yourself. What if he didn't like the present? What if it wasn't good enough? Your mind swirled with insecurities as you made your way to your first class, not even bothering to stop at your locker. Beomgyu would probably be there, across the hall at his, and you wouldn't be able to give him the present, let alone see or talk to him right now.

March 13th, 2017

It’s already lunch time and I still haven’t been able to give it to you. I also think you’ve caught onto the fact that I’m avoiding you. The guys were teasing me earlier but Taehyun realized just how nervous I actually am and has been staying by my side. After Valentine’s Day, it felt like we were both holding something back. I knew I was, but what could you be keeping from me? Do you like me too? That’s probably impossible. Did you pick up on the fact that I like you, and you don’t know how to tell me that you just want to be friends? I’m overthinking again…

Taehyun nudged you gently to get your attention. You looked up from fervently writing and saw his eyes filled with concern.

"Hey, are you okay?" he asked softly.

You sighed, closing the little black notebook.

"I don't know, Taehyun. I've been avoiding Beomgyu all day, and I can tell he's noticed. But I just... I can't bring myself to give him the present."

Taehyun tilted his head, his expression thoughtful.

"Why not?"

You looked at Taehyun, uncertainty clouding your eyes.

"I guess I'm just scared," you admitted reluctantly.

"What if he doesn't like it? What if it's not good enough?"

Taehyun's gaze softened, understanding flickering in his eyes. He placed a reassuring hand on your shoulder.

"Listen, I get it. It's natural to be nervous about this kind of thing. But Beomgyu is not the kind of person who would judge what kind of present he gets. And take it from me, he'd be over the moon to get anything as long as it's from you."

You took a deep breath, trying to absorb Taehyun's words of encouragement. He was right, you knew Beomgyu well enough by now to know that he wouldn't judge your gift. Still, the anxiety gnawed at you like a persistent itch.

"Thank you, Taehyun," you whispered, appreciating his unwavering support.

"I needed to hear that."

He squeezed your shoulder gently before releasing it and giving you an encouraging smile.

"Anytime. Now go find him and give him that present. I'm sure he's waiting for it."

March 13th, 2017

Despite what Taehyun said, I still didn’t do it. It's eighth period, and the bell signaling the end of the school day will ring in a few minutes. I know I’ll see you before going home, cause I have to go to my locker. I don’t need all these books. Maybe I can prolong going to my locker for as long as possible. Just until you, along with everyone else in the school leaves.

As the final bell rang, signaling the end of the school day, you found yourself lingering in the classroom, pretending to organize your books. Each passing minute felt like an eternity, and you couldn't shake off the knot of nervousness that had settled in your stomach. The classroom slowly emptied out, leaving you alone with your racing thoughts.

Ten minutes passed, and you peeked out of the classroom to find the halls nearly empty. This was your chance to pack up your books and head home, without the worry of bumping into anyone, especially Beomgyu. As you turned the corner, you spotted Beomgyu leaning against the lockers, his eyes casted down to the floor. Your heart skipped a beat at the sight of him, and you couldn't help but feel a mix of anxiousness and fear.

And a little bit of guilt.

What was he still doing here?

Beomgyu looked up as the sound of footsteps echoed through the empty hallway. His eyes met yours, and for a moment, time seemed to stand still. You watched as a flicker of surprise and disappointment passed over his face before he quickly masked it with a small smile.

"Hey," he said, his voice filled with warmth but tinged with a hint of uncertainty.

"Hi," you replied, your voice almost a whisper as nerves danced in your stomach.

Beomgyu seemed to sense your unease, taking a step closer to you, his expression filled with concern.

"Is everything alright?" he asked softly, his gaze locked with yours.

"You've been avoiding me all day."

"oh, you noticed," you mumbled, your voice barely audible.

Your eyes darted away from his gaze, unable to meet his penetrating stare. Beomgyu reached out, gently placing a hand on your arm.

"Yeah, I noticed," he said gently.

"Did I do something wrong?"

His touch caused you to jump, and he quickly retract his hand. You could see the hurt flash in his eyes, and guilt washed over you.

"No, no, it's not you," you stammered, finally mustering the courage to meet his gaze.

"It's just... I've been feeling overwhelmed today."

Beomgyu nodded, his expression softening with understanding.

"I'm sorry if I added to that. I didn't mean to make you feel overwhelmed."

You shook your head quickly, wanting to reassure him.

"No, it's not your fault, really. It's just... I didn't know how to give you something."

Beomgyu's brow furrowed slightly, confusion evident in his eyes.

"Give me something?" he repeated, his voice laced with curiosity.

"Happy Birthday," you whispered, your eyes squeezed shut as you held out the present you made for him.

Beomgyu's eyes widened as he took the gift from your trembling hands. For a moment, he simply stared at it, as if unable to comprehend what was happening. Then, a warm smile spread across his face, and he pulled you into a tight embrace.

"Thank you," he whispered, his voice filled with genuine gratitude.

"You have no idea how much this means to me."

Relief flooded through you as you melted into his embrace, feeling safe and secure in his arms.

"It's a bracelet. Like the one you gave me for my birthday. I added a teddy bear charm, cause well... you remember what I said," you whispered, your voice trailing off.

A tenderness settled over Beomgyu's expression, and he nodded in understanding.

"I remember," he replied softly, his fingers tracing the delicate charm on the bracelet.

"It means the world to me."

"I'm sorry for avoiding you," you murmured, your voice barely audible.

"I was just scared, clearly for no reason."

Beomgyu put the bracelet on, holding out his wrist for you to see. You gazed at his wrist, the bracelet snugly hugging his skin. The sight brought a smile to your face, and seeing you smile caused Beomgyu to smile too.

"Can I walk you home?" he softly asked, his voice filled with a newfound warmth.

You nodded, your heart fluttering with relief and excitement. As you walked side by side down the deserted school halls, you found yourself sticking closer than usual to him. The two of you strolled down the familiar streets, sharing lighthearted banter and laughter. Beomgyu's hand brushed against yours occasionally, sending feelings of electricity through your veins. As you reached your front gate, silence fell between the two of you.

"Thank you for walking me home," you said softly.

Beomgyu smiled, his eyes looking you over with pure adoration.

"It was my pleasure," he replied gently.

"I'm sorry again for avoiding you on your birthday," you said quickly, not wanting him to leave just yet.

"Don't apologize," he said, his voice filled with sincerity.

"Thank you again for the bracelet, I'll treasure it."

"I'm glad you like it," you whispered, your voice filled with genuine happiness.

A sudden burst of courage overtook you, "there's another thing I forgot to give you," you said almost confidently and made sure to meet his eyes.

Beomgyu's eyebrows raised in surprise, curiosity taking over his features.

"Oh? What is it?" he asked, a playful smile now tugging at the corners of his lips.

You took a deep breath, your heart hammering against your chest. All that nervousness was resurfacing but you weren't going to back out now. You slowly stood on your tippy toes and pressed a soft kiss to his cheek.

Beomgyu's eyes widened at the unexpected gesture, his cheeks turning a faint shade of pink. He stood frozen for a moment, processing the gentle touch of your lips on his skin.

"Thank you," he whispered, his voice barely audible. His hand instinctively reached up to touch the spot where your lips had touched his cheek.

"I'll see you at school tomorrow," you whispered, a shy smile playing on your lips.

Beomgyu nodded, still slightly stunned by the unexpected kiss.

"Yeah, definitely," he replied, his voice filled with a mix of surprise and anticipation.

"I'll see you tomorrow."

You waved goodbye, feeling a newfound sense of confidence as you walked towards your front door. As you closed the door behind you, the confidence turned to slight embarrassment and you felt your face get hot.

You can't believe you just did that.

May 18th, 2018

It’s hard to believe that junior year is almost over. Then we’ll be seniors. For some reason, today felt like one of those “hey let’s reflect on my life” days and I decided that I’ve been really happy lately. No I haven’t confessed to you, but we’ve definitely gotten closer. To the point where we hang out after school or even on the weekends, just the two of us. Sometimes (a lot of times), you’ll even ask to join me on my walks and it’s nice to have company on them. Or should I say your company. Aside from that, something a little strange happened this morning. Someone from the basketball team asked me out. I told him I’d think about it.

Even as you grow older, there’s something about Fridays that never loses its appeal. This particular Friday greeted you with a sense of optimism and well-being. The sun was shining and the sky was clear, almost like it was a sign of good things to come. You got to school earlier than usual, none of your friends are there yet, except for Kai because he's on the basketball team and they had practice before school began.

"Hey," Kai said with a smile as he approached you.

"You're here early today."

"Yeah, I woke up earlier than usual," you replied, returning his smile.

Kai leaned against the lockers beside you, his gaze fixated on the empty hallway.

"Listen, I wanted to talk to you about something."

Curiosity piqued, you turned to face him fully.

"Sure, what's up?"

Kai took a deep breath and his eyes darted around the hallway, almost as if he was hesitant to say anything.

"You know, Taeyang right? Our point guard?"

"Yeah, I know him," you replied, wondering where this conversation was headed.

Kai continued, his voice slightly hesitant.

"Well, he asked me to talk to you on his behalf. Since you and I are good friends and all. He... um... well, he wanted to ask you out."

You blinked, taken aback by the unexpected proposition. Taeyang was popular and well-liked, but you never considered dating him. You let out a nervous laugh, trying to process the sudden turn of events.

"Wait, seriously? Taeyang wants to ask me out?"

Kai nodded, a sympathetic smile on his face.

"Yeah, he's been talking about you lately."

"Wow, that's... unexpected," you spoke honestly, a small smile tugging at the corners of your lips.

"Well, what did you tell him?" you asked Kai, your heart pounding with a mix of nerves and what felt like excitement.

Kai sighed and ran a hand through his hair.

"I told him I'd talk to you about it. And honestly, I think you should consider it."

Kai wasn't exactly sure why he was telling you to consider it. He knew about Beomgyu's feelings towards you and even helped orchestrate the setup on Valentine's Day.

As you listened to Kai's words, a swirl of emotions filled your chest. On one hand, the idea of going out with Taeyang intrigued you. He was popular, charismatic, and undeniably attractive. Anyone would agree to go out with him in a heartbeat. But, your mind also couldn't help but drift to Beomgyu. You thought about how gentle, kind-hearted and attentive Beomgyu was. You liked Beomgyu, really liked him, but Kai didn't know that. You only told Taehyun, and Yeonjun somehow picked up on your feelings too. Taeyang may be popular and attractive, but he didn't evoke the same warmth and comfort and thrill as Beomgyu did.

Taking a deep breath, you looked at Kai, determination flickering in your eyes.

"Thank you for telling me, Kai. I appreciate it."

Kai's eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

"Wait, you decided already?"

You nodded, your voice filled with certainty.

"Yeah, I have. I don't see myself going out with Taeyang. He's probably a great guy, but there's someone else I've been thinking about."

Kai's eyes widened in surprise and he couldn't help but ask to confirm his suspicions.

"Do you mean... Beomgyu?"

A blush crept up your cheeks, confirming Kai's suspicion.

"Yeah, Beomgyu. I really like him. I have for a long time, but only came to terms with it when we got to high school."

A knowing smile tugged at the corners of Kai's lips as he leaned closer to you.

"I had a feeling," he whispered, his voice barely audible.

You looked at Kai, relief and nervousness flooding your heart.

"You knew?"

Kai chuckled softly, his eyes twinkling with amusement.

"Let's just say I'm good at reading people. And it became more obvious with the way you were acting on his birthday last year."

You couldn't help but blush at Kai's observation, remembering how nervous you had felt that day. It seemed that everyone had picked up on your feelings for Beomgyu except for Beomgyu himself. And maybe Soobin.

"Yeah, I tried my best to hide it," you admitted with a sheepish smile.

"But I guess I haven't been doing a very good job."

Kai shrugged and nudged you playfully.

"To be fair, it's hard to hide with the way your eyes light up whenever he's around."

You laughed softly, feeling a weight lift off your shoulders as you openly discussed your feelings for Beomgyu with Kai.

"So what are you going to do now?" Kai asked, his eyes filled with genuine curiosity.

"I think I'll wait and see if Taeyang talks to me himself. Cause I find it a little hard to believe that a guy like that would have someone else ask someone out for him," you said, your voice laced with a hint of skepticism.

"If he's interested, he can approach me directly. But as for Beomgyu, I don't know if I'll ever be able to tell him."

Kai nodded understandingly, his gaze sympathetic. He knew Beomgyu liked you, but he swore not to say anything.

Kai let out a soft sigh and reached out to give your hand a reassuring squeeze.

"I understand your hesitation. It's not easy to confess our feelings, especially when we fear the possibility of rejection. But sometimes, taking a chance is worth it."

You looked at Kai, his words resonating deep within your heart.

Taking a chance... Was it really worth it?

The fear of rejection loomed over you like a dark cloud, casting doubt upon your every thought. You shook your head, pushing all the negative thoughts away, and the sight of more students entering the hallway caught your attention.

Among the students making their way through the bustling hallway, you caught a glimpse of Beomgyu. He was talking and laughing with Soobin and Yeonjun. Your heart felt warm, and you couldn't help but smile at the sight of him. Kai followed your gaze and noticed Beomgyu too. His eyes twinkled mischievously as he leaned in closer to you.

"You know," he said, his voice low and conspiratorial, "there's no harm in taking matters into your own hands."

You looked at Kai, intrigued by his suggestion.

"What do you mean?"

Kai grinned, a playful glint in his eyes.

"Well, if you're hesitant about confessing directly, why not drop some subtle hints? See if Beomgyu picks up on them."

The idea both excited and terrified you.

"I-I'll consider that," you murmured.

The day progressed as usual, but you made the choice to sit outside during your lunch period. You found a quiet spot under a tree, the gentle rustling of leaves providing a soothing backdrop as you mulled over Kai's suggestion. The sun bathed you in its warm rays, and you took a deep breath, pulling out your little black notebook. Flipping through the pages, you came across several doodles and snippets of poetry and letters that you had written over the years. Lost in your thoughts, you absentmindedly traced the words you had written about Beomgyu.

Unaware of the passing time, a shadow fell over your notebook. Startled, you looked up to find Taeyang standing before you. He had a small smile on his face, his eyes reflecting curiosity and something else you couldn't quite place.

"Mind if I join you?" he asked, gesturing to the empty space next to you.

You blinked, momentarily taken aback by Taeyang's unexpected presence.

"Uh, sure," you stammered, quickly moving your backpack aside to make room for him.

Taeyang settled down beside you, his gaze lingering on your notebook for a brief moment before focusing on you. You quickly closed the notebook and put it back into your bag. Nervously, you fidgeted with the strap, unsure of what to say. You were the first to break the awkward (at least for you) silence when you mentioned that you and Kai had talked this morning. He leaned back against the tree and let out a small laugh.

"I didn't think he'd talk to you for me," Taeyang admitted.

"I also wanted to talk to you myself."

You looked at him, surprised by his straightforward honesty.

"Really?"

Taeyang nodded, his eyes searching yours.

"Yeah. I wanted to see if you'd be interested in going out on a date with me."

Your heart started beating faster, caught off guard by Taeyang's straightforwardness.

"Is it okay if I think about it?" you asked, trying to steady your racing thoughts.

Taeyang's smile faltered for a moment, his eyes filled with a hint of disappointment, but he quickly regained his composure.

"Of course, take your time," he replied, his voice gentle and understanding.

"I just wanted to let you know that I'm interested in getting to know you better."

You nodded, grateful for his patience.

"Thank you, Taeyang. I appreciate your honesty."

Afterwards, you collected your belongings and went in search of your friends, joining them for the remainder of lunch. You found them sitting at a table that was not too distant from the tree where you had just been sitting.

"So, what did Taeyang want?" Soobin asked, nudging your shoulder playfully as you sat down in the open space next to him.

You blushed, feeling a rush of nerves as all eyes turned toward you.

"Um, well... he asked me out on a date," you admitted shyly.

You noticed the way they all looked to Boemgyu before erupting into a chorus of excited exclamations, their enthusiasm coming off a little forced. Soobin clapped you on the back, causing you to nearly spill your water.

"That's amazing!" he exclaimed, his eyes wide with delight.

"Finally, someone recognizes how incredible you are!"

Blushing even more, you laughed at Soobin's exaggerated reaction.

"Thanks, Soobin. You guys are too much."

Yeonjun smirked and leaned in closer, his voice dripping with playful teasing.

"Well, I guess now we have to give you some dating advice. Remember, confidence is key."

Rolling your eyes, you playfully nudged Yeonjun back.

"Oh please, like you're an expert in dating."

Yeonjun feigned offense, clutching his heart dramatically.

"Hey, I'll have you know that I'm a smooth operator when it comes to matters of the heart."

"Before any dating advice, you guys should know that I didn't say yes. I told Taeyang I'd think about it," you explained, trying to temper their excitement.

"But why would you need to think about it?" Kai chimed in, a mischievous glint in his eyes as if he didn't remember anything you told him just this morning.

"Taeyang's a great guy and he likes you. What's there to think about?"

You sighed, realizing that your friends weren't going to let you off the hook easily.

"It's just... complicated," you murmured, avoiding their intense gazes.

You looked up from your fidgeting hands to see Beomgyu looking at you. His expression was unreadable, a mix of concern and something deeper that you couldn't quite place. It made your heart ache a little, the way he had been uncharacteristically quiet throughout the conversation.

"I think you should go for it," Beomgyu spoke softly.

The chatter from everyone else suddenly stopped and they all turned to him looking either confused, shocked or both. You looked at Beomgyu surprised, your heart sinking at his words. You felt a pang of disappointment at Beomgyu's response. His words weighed heavily on your heart, stirring up a whirlwind of emotions that you struggled to make sense of. It felt like a knife twisting in your chest as you realized that Beomgyu, the person you had secretly (not so secretly) harbored feelings for, was encouraging you to pursue someone else.

With a forced smile, you tried to brush off the sudden heaviness in the air.

"Thanks, Beomgyu. I appreciate your input," you said, your voice wavering ever so slightly.

The rest of your friends exchanged glances, sensing the tension that had seeped into the atmosphere. Soobin, always the peacemaker, cleared his throat and tried to lighten the mood.

"So, who's up for some ice cream after school?" Soobin suggested with a grin, hoping to distract everyone from the brewing awkwardness.

The suggestion seemed to work, as the tension in the air eased and your friends nodded eagerly, already planning which flavors they would get. You silently thanked Soobin for his quick thinking, grateful for his ability to diffuse any situation. Despite the lighthearted conversation that followed, the weight of Beomgyu's words still lingered in your mind. The bell rang shortly after, and even though you had your next class with Kai, you walked quickly to the classroom by yourself, needing some time alone to process what just happened.

May 18th, 2018

It’s the end of the school day and even though you didn’t say much, your words were all I could think about. You wanted me to date someone else… That has to mean that you don’t like me any more than a friend. I guess I’ll have to just deal with that-

Beomgyu closed the little black notebook.

He should've done so when he realized the notebook belonged to you, which was when he read the very first entry. He shouldn't have read any of your personal thoughts and feelings, but he couldn't help himself. He found it on a desk while looking for you after the final bell had rung. Thinking it was his own notebook, since he had the class earlier in the day and hasn’t been able to find his, he picked it up and sought out a blank page to write on, needing an outlet for the complicated feelings that surfaced at lunch today.

Beomgyu hesitated for a moment, contemplating whether he should confess his accidental discovery or simply leave the notebook on the desk without mentioning it. He was certain though that he had to be completely truthful with you about his feelings now. He didn't want you to go out with Taeyang, but he knew you might not believe him after the way he had encouraged you before.

He was in a state of panic, desperately trying to figure out how to make you understand his feelings without actually saying it, because he can't seem to say the right words around you. Rummaging through his bag, he pulled out his identical little black notebook, finding it at the very bottom, and put it on the desk where he found yours. He looked back at the book and let out a deep sigh before leaving the classroom.

Now he just had to wait.

When the last bell rang, you tried to get yourself out of the school building as quickly as you could, not bothering to stop by your locker. You were lost in your own thoughts, still replaying the conversation from earlier. The hallway was bustling with students, but everything around you seemed to blur into background noise. You continued walking, as if you were on autopilot, until your legs began to ache and you stopped. As you survey your surroundings, you realize that you somehow ended up at the park where you and Beomgyu spent Valentine's Day. The memories flood back and tears begin to well up in your eyes.

Why were you crying?

You didn't tell him how you felt, yet it still felt like you got rejected.

You take a seat on the nearest bench, resting your bag on your lap and frantically search for your little black notebook. It holds all of your thoughts about Beomgyu, but also serves as your diary, which you desperately need at the moment. Panic began to take hold as you hurriedly emptied your bag.

It wasn't there.

Your little black notebook was missing from your bag.

How could you have lost it?

The notebook held not only your innermost thoughts about Beomgyu but also all of your secrets and fears. Your mind races with possibilities. Did you drop it somewhere? Did someone take it? The thought of someone reading your most intimate thoughts and feelings made you feel sick to your stomach.

You feel a lump forming in your throat as tears threaten to spill from your eyes. The weight of the situation, combined with the emotional turmoil of the day, became overwhelming. Taking a deep breath, you put everything back into your bag and went back to school. The first place you checked was the lost and found in the main office, asking the teacher behind the desk if anyone turned it in. You heard the teacher rummage through a box of forgotten belongings, emerging with a solemn expression, "I'm sorry, no one turned in a notebook."

Your shoulders dropped slightly and you thanked her before quickly making your way to the classroom where your eighth period class was located. Walking into the classroom, your eyes anxiously scanned around the room, and you almost cried again upon seeing the little black notebook sitting on your desk. Relief washed over you as you hurriedly snatched up the notebook, clutching it to your chest.

It was still here, safe and sound.

But then, a flicker of doubt crept into your mind - had someone read it? Or did they just pick it up and put it on your desk for you? You shake your head in disbelief as you put the notebook back into your bag and begin your walk home. Your phone had been going off since the last bell rang, but you didn't bother to check it, already knowing that they were messages from your friends who had made plans to get ice cream after school. You'd talk to them tomorrow, you needed time to yourself.

Walking home, you couldn't help but feel a whirlwind of emotions. The sun had begun to set, casting a warm orange glow across the sidewalk. The familiar sights and sounds of your neighborhood seemed distant as your mind continued to replay everything that happened today. The events of the day had left you feeling vulnerable and exposed, and you once again thought about someone potentially reading your innermost thoughts. You arrived at your front door, feeling a mix of exhaustion and anxiety. Taking a deep breath, you inserted the key and opened the door, stepping into the comforting familiarity of your home. The silence enveloped you like a soft blanket, soothing the inner chaos that had plagued you most of the day.

You made your way to your room and immediately collapsed onto your bed, grateful for the privacy it offered. The weight of the day's events pressed down on you, making it hard to breathe. Retrieving your small black notebook and favorite pen from your bag, you sit up to record today's entry in your diary. As you flipped through the notebook, searching for a blank page, you came across handwriting that was both unfamiliar yet strangely familiar at the same time, causing your heart to stop.

This wasn't your book.

You furrowed your brow, confusion and curiosity intertwining in your mind.

How did this notebook end up on your desk?

You cautiously flipped through the pages, your eyes scanning the words before you. It was filled with beautiful prose and heartfelt musings, but they were not your own. Each word felt like a glimpse into someone else's soul. As you continued to read, your own name caught your attention. It was written delicately, in most of the entries, as if it was a whisper on the page. Your heart pounded in your chest as you read the words that followed. The way this person described you, your quirks, your smile, and the way your eyes sparkled when you laughed. It was an ode to your existence, penned by an unknown admirer. You couldn't believe what you were reading.

This notebook was one that matched the contents in yours, except it was about you.

Overwhelmed by the emotions flooding through you, you sat in stunned silence. The realization that someone had been writing about you with such depth and appreciation, the way you wrote about Beomgyu, left you feeling a mix of emotions.

You continued reading, even though you knew you shouldn't, a sense of longing and familiarity washed over you. The way this person described your interactions, the shared moments and inside jokes, it all resonated deeply within your soul. Oddly enough, reading this notebook felt like flipping through the pages of your own diary. The realization caused goosebumps to form, trailing down your arms.

This was Beomgyu's notebook.

With trembling hands, you slowly closed the notebook and carefully reached over to retrieve your bag.

As you were trying to put it away, a photograph slipped out from between the pages. You immediately recognized the photo as one taken last week. Beomgyu had joined you for an evening walk and brought his polaroid camera along.

As you strolled along the Han River, a kind stranger offered to take a picture of the two of you together. The stranger had taken a few, but this one in particular was beautiful. It captured the essence of that moment perfectly, the way Beomgyu's laughter lit up his face and the way your eyes sparkled with genuine happiness. Neither of you were purposely posing for the picture, but that's what made it feel authentic.

You held the photo delicately in your hands, studying the smiles on both your faces. It was evident how happy you were together, and yet, you couldn't help but wonder why Beomgyu had kept this notebook a secret from you. Probably for the exact same reason you kept yours a secret from him. Closing your eyes, you tried to process the new whirlwind of emotions that engulfed you. The discovery of Beomgyu's hidden admiration for you felt like stumbling upon a forbidden treasure. A myriad of questions swirled around in your mind and it felt overwhelming.

Amidst all the questions and overwhelming emotions, one thing was undeniable: you liked Beomgyu and he liked you too.

Sitting on the edge of your bed, you've been staring at the closed notebook in your lap for what feels like hours. The buzzing of your phone drew your attention away from the emotional whirlwind that started during lunch. With a heavy sigh, you grabbed your phone and saw that it was flooded with notifications from your friends. They ranged from asking you what ice cream flavor you wanted to the everlasting debate on mint-chocolate. The most recent message was from Taehyun, expressing his concern for you and letting you know where they were in case you decided to join them. As you scrolled through the notifications, you noticed that none of them were from Beomgyu.

Your heart sank a little at the realization that Beomgyu hadn't reached out to you. It had been hours since you had discovered his notebook, and the weight of the unanswered questions was becoming unbearable. Why hadn't he said anything? Was he waiting for you to say something? Taking a deep breath, you decided that enough was enough. You couldn't keep dwelling on these uncertainties and waiting for Beomgyu to make the first move. If you wanted answers, you had to be brave enough to seek them out yourself.

When you glanced at the clock, you saw that it was the time you typically go for your evening stroll. You grabbed his notebook and slipped it into a canvas bag, carefully stepping outside. The evening air was crisp, carrying with it the scent of blooming flowers and a sense of anticipation. The streets were bathed in the warm glow of streetlights, casting long shadows on the pavement as you walked. You arrived at the location Taehyun had sent you, and through the window of the ice cream parlor, you saw them sitting at a table in the far corner.

Your friends looked up in surprise as you entered the ice cream parlor, a mix of concern and curiosity evident on their faces. Taehyun, ever perceptive, noticed the canvas bag slung over your shoulder and the determined look in your eyes.

"You made it!" he exclaimed, his voice filled with relief.

"We were worried about you."

Taking a seat, you responded with a small smile, though your mind was still preoccupied with thoughts of Beomgyu. Your eyes searched the crowded parlor, hoping to catch a glimpse of him somewhere amidst the sea of faces. But he was nowhere to be found.

Lost in your thoughts, you barely noticed when Yeonjun nudged your arm gently.

"Hey, are you alright?" he asked, concern etched into his features.

You blinked, pulling yourself back to the present moment.

"I'm... I'm fine," you replied, your voice betraying a hint of uncertainty.

"Um, where's Beomgyu?" you asked, mentally facepalming at your voice faltering slightly.

Yeonjun exchanged a glance with Taehyun before answering, his voice laced with sympathy.

"He... he left a little while ago."

Trying to hide your disappointment, you mustered a smile and nodded, pretending that it didn't bother you as much as it did.

"Oh, I see," you replied softly.

"Did he say where he was going?"

Taehyun cleared his throat, exchanging another glance with Yeonjun before answering.

"No, he didn't mention anything. He just said he had something important to take care of and left in a hurry."

Something important?

Your mind raced with possibilities, then your eyes widened in realization.

"Wait, what time did he leave?" you asked, a sense of urgency creeping into your voice.

Soobin checked his watch and furrowed his brows.

"I think it was around thirty minutes ago," he replied, his eyes filled with concern.

"Is everything okay?"

You stood up abruptly, the canvas bag slipping off your shoulder and hitting the table with a soft thud.

"I need to go," you announced.

Without waiting for a response, you hastily picked up the canvas bag and rushed out of the ice cream parlor. This morning, Beomgyu had asked to accompany you on your evening walk, and you had agreed to meet at the park.

That park.

Heart pounding, you picked up your pace as you made your way towards the park. It was a familiar route, one that you had walked countless times together with him. The anticipation in your chest was overwhelming, and all you could hope was that he was there.

As you entered the park, you scanned the area, searching for any sign of him. Your eyes fell upon a figure sitting on a bench near the pond and relief washed over you as you recognized the familiar silhouette. Beomgyu was there, his head bowed down, engrossed in deep thoughts. You approached him cautiously, not wanting to startle him.

"Beomgyu," you called out softly, your voice carrying both unease and longing.

Beomgyu looked up, surprise flickering in his eyes as he met your gaze. His expression quickly transformed into one of relief, and he stood up, a mix of emotions crossing his face.

"I didn't think you'd come," he said, his voice soft.

"I had to," you replied, your own voice trembling slightly.

You pulled his little black notebook out of your bag and clutched it tightly.

"I found this," you started, holding out the notebook towards him, "when I went back to school to look for mine."

Beomgyu reached out and took the notebook from your hands, his fingers brushing against yours for a brief moment. His fingers traced the worn edges, the pages filled with his words and thoughts. He looked up at you, his eyes shimmering with unspoken emotions.

"I was hoping you would. I left it there on purpose," he admitted, his voice barely above a whisper.

"I wanted you to find it, to know how I felt."

"Then... then that means-" before you could continue, he pulled your notebook out of his bag and nodded.

Yeah," Beomgyu interrupted, a small smile gracing his lips.

"I found yours."

As you reached out to take your notebook from Beomgyu's hands, your fingers brushed against each other again, and a tingling sensation coursed through your veins.

"Did you-" you started to ask, but then stopped yourself.

The answer was already clear. If he didn't read your book, he wouldn't have left his for you to find. The unspoken understanding between you and Beomgyu hung in the air, as if time had frozen in that moment. Without a word, Beomgyu stood up and took a step closer to you. The air crackled with anticipation as he reached out, his hand gently reaching out to hold yours. His touch was tender, a tenderness that spoke volumes.

"I've been wanting to tell you for so long," he whispered, his voice barely audible.

Your heart skipped a beat at his words, and you found yourself unable to form a coherent response. You took a deep breath, trying to steady your racing heart.

"I've wanted to tell you too," you finally managed to say.

Beomgyu's eyes searched yours, his thumb gently caressing the back of your hand as he leaned closer.

"Do you remember that party? The one we kissed at?" he asked softly, his voice filled with nostalgia and vulnerability.

"How could I forget?" you replied softly, your gaze locked with his.

"That was my very first kiss."

"When you told me you'd like the real me, that's when I knew. Since then, it's always been you " he confessed, his voice barely a whisper.

"You've liked me for that long? But then-" you cut yourself off, realizing it wasn't the appropriate moment to bring it up.

Beomgyu smiled as if he knew what you were going to ask, "all the other boys liked her, so I followed the crowd. Stupid, I know."

"I've felt the same way," you confessed, your voice barely above a whisper.

"I've always seen you, Beomgyu. I've always loved you. It just took me a long time to realize and then accept it."

Beomgyu's eyes softened, relief and adoration shining in them.

"I'm sorry it took me so long," you murmured.

"Don't apologize," Beomgyu whispered, his voice filled with delicacy.

A gentle breeze rustled the leaves around you, as if nature itself was acknowledging the significance of this moment.

Beomgyu leaned in closer, his lips just inches away from yours.

"Can I ask something else?" he whispered, his breath warm against your skin.

You nodded, anticipation coursing through your veins.

"I didn't get to kiss you that second time, can I make up for it now?"

The question hung in the air as you looked into Beomgyu's eyes and felt your heart race. A smile tugged at the corners of your lips, and you nodded, giving him permission to make up for that missed opportunity.

Beomgyu's eyes lit up with delight and nervousness as he closed the remaining distance between you. His lips met yours in a gentle, sweet kiss. Time seemed to stand still as you melted into each other, the world around you fading away. It was a moment of pure bliss, a culmination of emotions and desires that had been building up for far too long. The kiss was everything, full of promises and possibilities. His arms wrapped around your waist, pulling you closer to him, while yours found their way around his neck, tangling in his soft hair.

And then, as if the universe had conspired with your group of friends, the sound of clapping and cheers caused you to pull away. You glanced over Beomgyu's shoulder and saw your friends standing there, huge smiles on their faces, applauding the two of you.

Taehyun and Yeonjun were grinning like they had just won the lottery, and Soobin and Kai pretending they had tears welling up in their eyes, wiping them away. You couldn't help but laugh at the sight. Beomgyu turned to look at your friends, his cheeks flushed from the kiss.

"Guess we've been caught," he mumbled and pulled you closer.

Your friends approached, still clapping and cheering, their laughter echoing through the park.

Taehyun gave you a playful wink while Yeonjun threw an arm around Soobin's shoulders, teasing him about his "emotional" display.

Kai, always the romantic, applauded the loudest and shouted, "Finally! Took you both long enough!"

You blushed looking everywhere but your friends , feeling a mixture of embarrassment and joy. Beomgyu squeezed your hand reassuringly, a silent reminder that this was real, that it was happening.

As the laughter subsided, Yeonjun cleared his throat and glanced at the others mischievously.

"Well, I think it's time for us to give these two some privacy," he said with a sly grin, playfully nudging Beomgyu.

Beomgyu chuckled, a hint of pink dusting his cheeks.

"Yeah, I think that's a good idea," he replied, his gaze never leaving yours.

Your friends exchanged knowing glances before making their way towards the park's exit, leaving the two of you alone. The park was now quiet, the only sounds being the soft rustling of leaves. The tranquility of the moment wrapped around you like a comforting embrace, allowing you to fully soak in the reality of what had just transpired.

Beomgyu took a step closer, his eyes never leaving yours. The intensity of his gaze made your heart skip a beat, and you felt a wave of vulnerability wash over you. This was uncharted territory, a new beginning for both of you.

"What now?" you asked.

Beomgyu reached out, his hand trembling slightly, and gently brushed a strand of hair behind your ear. His touch sends shivers down your spine, igniting a spark deep within your soul. It was a gesture so simple yet so intimate, conveying a depth of emotion that words could never capture.

"Well first," Beomgyu whispered softly, "I think I should ask you properly."

"Ask me what?" you replied, your voice barely a whisper, afraid to break the delicate spell that had woven itself around the two of you.

Beomgyu took a deep breath and looked into your eyes, his gaze unwavering.

His voice quivered slightly, “Can I be your boyfriend? Will you let me love you and cherish you, like you deserve?"

The vulnerability and sincerity in his voice made your heart swell with love for him.

You reached out to cup his face gently, your fingertips grazing his cheek.

"Yes," you whispered, "as long as you'll let me love you the same."

He pulled you into a tight embrace, holding you as if he never wanted to let go. The weight of his feelings enveloped you, filling every corner of your being with warmth and contentment. You pressed your cheek against his chest, listening to the steady beat of his heart.

"Just so you know," you murmured, "I still plan on writing you love letters like in the book."

"Will you send them to me this time?" he asked, a playful glint in his eyes.

"Of course," you replied, a giggle escaping your lips.

"I'll send them straight to your heart."

a/n: thank you for reading, I really hoped you enjoyed it as much as I did while writing it! I've been working on this story since October of last year and it's crazy how the idea stemmed from a little joke I made. As always, reblogs and comments are appreciated and thank you again for reading!

Beomgyu Masterlist

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#✎˖ᝰbeomgyucoded✧˖°#choi beomgyu #choi beomgyu fluff #choi beomgyu x reader #txt beomgyu #beomgyu #beomgyu fluff #beomgyu x reader #txt #txt fluff #txt x reader #tomorrow x together #⇢ ˗ˏˋ beomgyu 🧸 ࿐ྂ

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