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Maya: Get ripped. Eat pasta. Be gay.
Riley: The only thing I rip is packages of pasta open with my gay hands.
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Lucas: Zay and Smackle? I don't see it.
Maya:
Lucas: Oh, God, now I see it.
Maya:
Lucas: Maya, I can't stop seeing it.
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Maya: You aren’t coming with me?
Cory: Maya, I’m not your dad.
Maya:
Cory:
Cory: [hands her a lunchbox]
Cory: Here are your sandwiches. I’ll pick you up at five.
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I really like your profile picture
thanks :)
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Smackle: I'm going to take it slow tonight.
Smackle, 5 minutes later: Aaaaaand I'm drunk.
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Riley: Okay, so tell me, when exactly will I be allowed to hang out with Lucas?
Cory: When I'm dead. Plus three days, just to make sure I'm dead.
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Farkle: [falls]
Farkle: I suppose I’ll have to add the force of gravity to my list of enemies.
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Maya: I keep saying things I regret
Lucas: Have you considered not saying things?
Maya: Haha.
[Maya pulls out a megaphone]
Maya: No.
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Cory: Don't you miss the vivid imagination of childhood?
Farkle: I never had one.
Cory: An imagination or a childhood?
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(Cerca. 3 AM)
Farkle: I just calculated. I’m 100 kilos and I just ate 800 grams of ravioli. Like a whole fucking can. That means I’m 0.8% ravioli.
Maya: It’s 3am, what the fuck?
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Riley: [sees a fat cat]
Riley, in tears: You are so fucking big I love you…
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Riley: You were reading my diary again, weren’t you?
Farkle: How can you tell?
Riley: You corrected all my spelling mistakes.
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Zay: Over here, old friend. In case you haven’t noticed, you’ve fallen right into my trap.
Lucas: You can’t trap justice. It’s an idea! A belief!
Zay: Well, even the most heartfelt belief can be corroded over time!
Lucas: Justice is a noncorrosive metal!
Zay: But metals can be melted by the heat of revenge!
Lucas: It’s REVENGE, and it’s best served cold!
Zay: But it could be easily reheated, in the microwave of evil!
Lucas: Well, I think your warranty is about to expire!
Zay: Maybe I’ve got an extended warranty!
Lucas: Warranties are invalid if you don’t use the product for its intended purpose!
Farkle: [groans] Girls, girls! You’re both pretty! Can I go home now?
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Riley: There has to be something that makes you cry. What if you saw a three-legged puppy?
Zay: [starts to cry]
Smackle: I’d be sad, sure, but I wouldn’t cry.
Riley: What if the puppy said ‘Help me, Smackle! All the other puppies pick on me!’?
Zay: [cries harder]
Smackle: Cry? I’ve just found a talking puppy, I’m rich!
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Maya: My dad always said that if all the other kids were jumping off a cliff, I should, too.
Riley: He told you that?
Maya: He wasn’t a nurturer.
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Riley: Maya! How did you get in here?
Maya: Oh, uh, through the hole in the middle of your floor.
Riley: But I don’t have a hole in my floor.
Maya: [holding a shovel] You do now.
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Riley: Today is the day we reveal to the galaxy the “League Of Villainous Evildoers United For Frightening Investments in Naughtiness!
Farkle:
Lucas:
Maya: You want us to be called… L.O.V.E.M.U.F.F.I.N.?
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