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the-adhd-archives · 2 years

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How does one become capable of asexual reproduction?

#i need to know #for scientific reasons #like c’mon #from a evolutionary standpoint #how does that even happen #what event needs to occur for asexual reproduction to be a must have in order to survive?#also why #questions #asexual #asexual reproduction #nature #biology #the adhd archives

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the-adhd-archives · 2 years

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I had a dream where I was eating lunch with my brother and he was telling me that Italian were less likely to kill themselves because they need to serve at Italian restaurants which was hella out of pocket like? I’m sorry?? What???

#tw: sui mention #italian restaurant #Italians #out of character #sibling #it almost makes sense but it sounds really rude #I’m sorry to italians #dream nonsense #the adhd archives

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the-adhd-archives · 3 years

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Me, crying while trying to defend myself: Get your fucking bird bitch!!

Florida’s ecosystem: He don’t bite :D

Me, holding back more tears: YES HE DO

#florida #heron?#idfk how to spell it #big thin bird #has the eyes of a killer #I actually really love birds but this one scared me

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the-adhd-archives · 3 years

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I swear to god if another mosquito gives me the hurt juice, I can and will eat a whole swarm of them.

#the adhd archives

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the-adhd-archives · 3 years

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🥕🐡

#the adhd archives

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the-adhd-archives · 3 years

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I unfortunately perform best under stress.

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the-adhd-archives · 3 years

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i was re-reading “how to talk so little kids will listen” earlier today, and it reminded me of how much of our culture is so thoroughly punitive – every facet of the way we behave, and expect others to behave, is connected by the concept of punishment. there has been a rise in respectful parenting theory in the past 40-ish years that goes directly against this punitive parenting style.

i have some books that have helped me with respectful parenting here:

https://www.goodreads.com/review/list/2168390?shelf=parenting

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something i was thinking in my re-read of this book earlier today is how my first impulse while parenting tends to be a reactionary, punitive impulse. sure, you might be patient when the kid is being cute and you have lots of energy. but on an off day? you have to fight against what you’ve learned. even if the kid does something incredibly naughty.

i was reminded of a time when my kid was left alone with the cat, and she started rubbing lotion all over the cat. i think she thought she was doing something nice for her; she was only 2.5 at the time. when i saw the cat, my anxiety spiked. i spoke to her sternly and had her help me clean up the cat, but i was wracked with fear and nervousness – “oh no, what if the cat licks herself and gets sick? what if the cat dies? what if the cat dies because of what my kid did?” i started to feel like just talking to my kid about it wasn’t enough… should we say, “time out”? no dessert? no more cat? no more trips to the bakery? i promised myself i would never spank, but inside, there was a part of me that felt like spanking!! that’s what my parents did!

but after i stewed for a while, i came to my senses. my kid was just being a kid. little kids have no impulse control! but me? i’m an adult, i should have known better! it was really my fault for leaving the kid and the lotion and the cat all together, unsupervised. in a way, my strong reaction to her behavior was just myself projecting the guilt at having a bad parenting moment onto her.

how effective is punitive speech, and punitive acts?

do you think she would have learned something if i had hit her? or locked her in her room? or took away her snacks? (these are not what those in the respectful parenting community would call natural consequences – these are just unconnected punishments, things that have nothing to do with the cat.)

no. i still would have had a lotioned cat.

what if i had lectured? yelled? gone on at length about how terribly naughty it was, and what a bad girl she was?

no. i still would have had a lotioned cat.

the actual consequence in this instance was for me. because i messed up. the natural consequence: now i have to clean up the damn cat and put the lotion where my kid can’t reach it… and supervise the kid more closely, because she’s only a toddler.

my kid felt bad as soon as she saw how bad i felt. she didn’t show it at the moment – just nervous laughter. but i could tell she felt bad, and sure enough, later that night, she cried about it, and we got to talk more about how the lotion was not good for the cat, and how i was going to put it out of her reach for now.

and that’s…. enough.

it really is.

and it’s so fucking hard to wrap your mind around it. because our entire culture revolves around law and order, crime and punishment! if people mess up, hurt them! lock them away! demolish their self-esteem!

none of that shit helps anyone. it only feels good as a short-term solution.

in the long-term? we have to start believing in the inherent preciousness of every life. it will be hard as fuck to change our collective mindset. but we have to do it. because everything is connected to it, from huge things like climate change, all the way down to a little toddler learning how to interact with a cat.

once you see it, you’ll see the punitive attitude in everything. you’ll see how little it actually fixes. and hopefully you’ll become an abolitionist too.

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the-adhd-archives · 3 years

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I’m 30 minutes early for my dentist appointment bc my mom didn’t put it in the family calendar.

I don’t know what to do

#the adhd archives #dentist #early #i don’t like this

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the-adhd-archives · 3 years

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This kind of light fixtures make me want to fill them up with either beans or egg yolk

#the ADHD archives #beans #egg yolk #light fixtures #neurodivergent #EFD #executive function disorder #adhd if you will

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the-adhd-archives · 3 years

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@bentlythedog

@almostanavenger

Lmao but what if we had a slow burn wlw romance where we platonically flirted with each other until one of us caught feelings

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the-adhd-archives · 3 years

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“I don’t want to be called this” valid, you’re setting a boundary that absolutely should be respected.

“No one should be called this ever and the people who use it for themselves are wrong” bullshit, you don’t have say over other people.

“This discussion doesn’t involve me in any way, but I’m going to act like it does” go outside and touch grass.

“This person calls themself a term that I’m not comfortable with!” boy do I have news for you. You don’t have to interact with that person at all.

“This person calls me a term that I’m not comfortable with!” try telling them that it makes you uncomfortable, and if they don’t stop you may want to consider avoiding them if possible

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the-adhd-archives · 3 years

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TransTape: A Guide

I've gotten a lot of asks about TransTape, and noticed a lot of gaps in knowledge. I've been binding with it for over a year now, and I thought a little guide might be helpful!

What is TransTape?

TransTape is an alternative to using a compression binder (like gc2b sells) that does not use compression; instead, a body-safe cloth tape is used to pull your chest underneath your armpits and stick them there against your skin.

Taken from the TransTape Instagram [IMAGES: Three shirtless people with rectangles of transtape pulling their chests flat and under their armpits, so they look more like pecs than breasts. /END]

TransTape was developed by trans people, for binding, from kinetic tape- which is used to treat physical injuries and disabilities in athletics. Though kinetic tape isn't proven to actually improve these problems, it is tested and safe to wear the way TransTape is worn.

Kinetic tape can be used as a cheaper alternative to TransTape, it just doesn't come in the sizes and nude colors generally preferable for binding.

Is It Safe?

Because TransTape doesn't use compression, it doesn't have an impact on your ribcage, lungs, or other internal organs like a compression binder does. It only interacts with your skin, which means short-term and long-term use will only impact your skin.

To the best of available knowledge, TransTape is safe as long as you apply it and remove it correctly. It can be worn while sleeping, exercising, showering/getting wet, and doing all of your other normal activities.

How long you can wear an application of TransTape depends on your lifestyle; the company recommends 3-5 days, with breaks of 1-2 days between applications.

Is It For Me?

Whether TransTape works for you depends on a lot of different factors, but the biggest deciding factor will likely be body type. Like any type of binding, larger chests are harder to flatten/masculinize, and the density of your chest can play a role as well. Skin sensitivity may also be a factor.

My recommendation is to try one roll, start with a test strip to check skin sensitivity, and give it at least 2 or 3 applications to check compatibility. You can check out TransTape's Instagram for some examples of different body types and the different ways people apply it.

The Brand

TransTape itself is expensive, and they've made some weird choices about things like essential oils. That said, they have the best guides and the most information on safe, correct use of binding tape.

You do not need to buy their products. The healing salve and removal oil in particular are more expensive than necessary. I recommend using lip balm in your nipple covers, baby oil for removal, and regular body lotion after removal instead of their products.

Application

TransTape has made a very detailed and comprehensive guide to safe application, which I recommend following.

Every body is different, and the method of application that works best for you may be different from what works best for other people. Experiment! It'll take a few tries to figure out what works for you; I took eight months to fine-tune my method.

Here's how I bind:

[IMAGE: A drawing of a torso with three strips of transtape: #1 is 3 sections long, starts 2 inches from the center of the chest, and the bottom edge of the tape runs over the bottom of the breast. #2 is 3 sections long, and overlapped on top of #1 where the nipple is. #3 is 3.5 sections long, placed directly over the middle of #1 and #2, and has one inch in front of and behind the ends of #1 and #2. The text says "Apply nipple covers, then strip 1, 2, then 3. Ensure ends of strip 3 both "anchor" on skin. /END]

I use a lot more tape than their method does, but this is easiest and flattest for me! It might be a good start for beginners.

Safety Tips

To ensure application is safe, remember to:

Apply nipple covers. Use 1/2 of a section of tape, with a square of toilet paper folded into thirds each way in the middle. Lip balm on your nipples and the toiler paper will keep your nipples hydrated.

Use a 1-2 inch "anchor" on both ends of the tape; this area of the tape should not be stretched. This prevents your skin from itching or getting shallow, surface-level abrasions while wearing.

Remove tape ASAP if you experience any amount of bleeding or pain. Itching is normal, especially with your first few applications, but shouldn't continue for more than a day or two of wear.

Never apply over wounds/scabs/abrasions. Scars are fine, but make sure your skin is healed before application.

Safe Removal

TransTape's how-to guide includes a section on safe application, which I recommend deferring to. Some basics:

Never remove tape dry. Always soak your tape thoroughly with oil before removal; removal oil and baby oil are preferable, and coconut oil is also safe, but will leave adhesive residue.

Rub tape off, don't peel. If you rub at the ends/edges of the tape while it's oiled, it'll start to come off on its own in about 2-5 minutes. This is the best way to ensure you don't damage your skin.

Removal should never hurt. Slow down if you're feeling more than, at most, a light sting here and there. It's okay if you get some redness or shallow abrasions, but you should go more slowly next time.

Let your skin rest! Give your skin a day or two of rest between wears, if possible. I usually wear a compression binder on those days, and the drastically reduced use of compression binders means I'm still avoiding the long-term risks they can come with.

Lotion & TLC: use lots of lotion on your chest between wears, and otherwise treat your skin nicely!

Removal is where the most damage to your skin can occur, so it's important that you follow safety instructions.

Managing Expectations

There is a learning curve with TransTape, and it takes a while to get the hang of it. A lot of people try it once and give up, but it will get easier and more effective with more attempts.

Here's some things to keep in mind:

Your first attempt will suck. Mine looked like I was just wearing a bra, and I felt incredibly dysphoric about it. The second attempt was a little better, and the third attempt was much better.

It takes a long time to get the hang of it. Like, months. You'll keep figuring out better methods and getting flatter over time.

You skin isn't used to this. Part of getting flatter is your skin learning to stretch a bit more over time.

Tightness. Your skin will feel tight in the center of your chest with your first few applications; this is normal, and it won't tear there.

Itching. Your skin will itch under the tape; I got it really badly around the second day of wear. This eases up and eventually stops after a couple of months of consistent use, as your skin adjusts.

Stretching. Your skin will stretch near the center of your chest, and you may notice a slight change in texture. This is normal, should be very subtle, and should go back to normal if you stop wearing tape for a long enough time.

"Masculinization" vs. Flattening: TransTape can get folks flat, but more often it's about re-shaping your chest to be more "masculine"/look like pecs rather than breasts. It just depends on your body type!

TransTape isn't for everyone, but it can be a really great alternative for a lot of folks, too. It might be worth a shot! Just be safe, manage your expectations, and try to give it a few applications before you give up on it.

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the-adhd-archives · 3 years

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