I think the most despicable thing I realised about August is the fact that when he tries to “apologise” to Wilhelm and says,

[“I understand that what I did to you is unforgivable”]

— he doesn’t actually mean he knows what he did was morally wrong. He means that he knows what he did broke rules, defamed the Royal court, ruined his friendship with Wilhelm, the Crown Prince.

We see where August’s values lie when he shares exactly what he took out of the situation, which was,

[“I have accepted that you will hate me for the rest of your life”]

He understands ethically that what he did was illegal, and that there are serious consequences to it, but the extent of his shame and guilt only goes as far as its impacts on the Royal Court and his standing with the Royal Family. He thinks Wilhelm just hates him for posting the video, rather than hating him for all the flow on effects that it has caused, such as Wilhelm being forced to lie, his break up with Simon, his fallout with his parents, the lack of trust he has for everything August represents at the school, the loneliness of feeling completely abandoned by everything and everyone that was supposed to protect and support him.

And there is an element of lack of awareness on August’s part to a degree, but we clearly see that he doesn’t actually feel bad about how it has personally impacted Wilhelm. And given how he’s so quick to jump to blackmail, threats and scapegoats, he clearly does not care, either.

Just another thing that I loved the most about Young Royals s2 (among many) is that how they focused on showing Wilhelm's side of the story.

I know a lot of people complained about not showing how bad it was for Simon in the aftermath of Wilhelm's denial/ video's leak and I actually would have liked to see a more about that as well, but I also liked that s2 showed how much pressure Wilhelm was actually under. It wasn’t just him being manipulated by his mom and abiding by her order. It was the entire freaking royal court. While Simon was right and justified in his decision of not wanting to be a secret, I think even he didn’t understand the magnitude of what he was asking from Wille.

I especially liked Wilhelm's conversation with Nils because it showed how someone else, a neutral person but with sort of similar position, understands Wilhelm and understand how hard it must have been for him and the kind of pressure he is under.

Thankfully in the end Simon understands it as well and decides to be secret. And this makes Wilhelm's declaration/coming out in the speech even more special and revolutionary. Despite the pressure and the difficulty, Wilhelm decided to put Simon and his relationship first. He came out so that they are finally in an equal place and so that the court cannot play him anymore. He basically eliminated that one obstacle in their relationship and gave Simon his everything. And I don't think anything can be more beautiful than this.

they chose each other, finally.

but it's so much more than that.

in my opinion the underlying reason simon and wilhelm have always been drawn together, though of course they celebrate each other's strengths, is in the way they gently encourage each other to confront what might be holding them back from happiness and healing.

simon is a thinker - he's a top student, always intellectualising his next step. thinking for himself, thinking about what's best for sara, about his mum, about taking care of his friends. he feels so deeply - we know he does - but this is always secondary to what his brain tells him about a situation. and what his fascination, attraction and love for wilhelm stirs in him is a depth of feeling. he's not thinking when he's leaning in to kiss the prince at movie night! he's not thinking when he stumbles back to school with wille after the football field. he's not thinking when he abandons marcus to find wilhelm at the ball, when he agrees to keep things secret between them, when he tries to toe the line of the royal court so they can be together. and not that these feelings always lead to what's best for simon, but they start to be something he listens to and follows. he shifts from giving second chances because he thinks that's what should be done, to embracing his loved ones in their full selves because he feels a deep love for them and a love for himself that deserves them in his life.

and wilhelm? wilhelm is a feeler - wille does not for one second stop and think in that first season, hardly in the second and nigh on zero in the third, until that very last episode. wilhelm feels it all - anger, frustration, boredom, pride, arrogance, grief grief grief, loneliness, attraction, lust and love. he acts without second guessing why. he screams without caring who he pierces with them. but then ever so slowly, he starts listening to others and his brain zips online. he's taking note of those cleverer and wiser than himself. he's listening to his feelings and decoding them into the language of words, and most importantly, of considered action.

so we have a simon whose patient questions and careful soul encourages wilhelm to begin thinking for himself, and we have a wilhelm whose unyielding heart, affection and devotion encourages simon understand the value of his feelings, his understanding of himself and others.

thus wilhelm's last choice of the series - to consider simon's words, and those of others around him (boris, my man), and come to a considered decision to reject the institution he was raised in because it's harming everyone he loves - displays the enormous growth simon's catalysed in him. he's finally listening to his head.

and of course then simon's last choice of the series - to choose to let wilhelm in, to choose to stop the car, to once again let himself be vulnerable in the face of dizzying emotion - displays the depth of feeling wilhelm has helped him uncover within himself. he's finally listening to his heart.

they both had a choice, and they both chose themselves, and in choosing themselves, they chose each other.

but they never would have chosen themselves if they had not first chosen each other.

simon's arc and growth in s3 was one of my favorite storylines and is one of the main reasons i like s3 so much.

in s1 we got to see the foundations of such a beautiful complex character - a boy who loves his family and those who have earned their way into his heart almost more than himself, loyal to a fault, vibrant and not afraid to make himself more of an outsider by standing by his ethos and personality.

and simon being his truest self taught the 2 most important ppl in his life their key lessons. sara now understands the gift of giving ppl second chances and wanting to hope they wont always fuck it all up. and wille learned everything from simon. how to love unashamedly. how to believe in yourself. how to look outside of yourself. how to speak your mind. how to forgive. how to live freely

idk i think there is something so missing in ppl who cant understand his character in s3 and maybe its a lack of life experience but knowing when you need to remove yourself from a situation that is destroying you and the ppl you love is important and real. he made himself so small to try and fit for willes life and that hurt them both, wille needed shining simon as much as simon did.

love is not always enough and simon was brave for recognizing that. for continuing to stand by issues and ideals that were deeply important to him. to recognize when his own actions were causing ppl harm. to continue to forgive and give ppl more chances despite being hurt but also knowing when he needs to put himself first

on my first watch of s3ep6 it something i couldnt stop thinking abt and i stand by it on a few rewatches, for someone so integral to everyone's personal growth bc he was that catalyst or lesson for them, he felt a bit forgotten. and i get there was a lot of loose ends to be tied up but im ngl he felt a little rushed/in limbo bc of it but i still think he had a full beautiful arc in s3. and the way ppl still damn him for every move makes me wish he had even more time to develop throughout esp s2 i wish everyone could see just how beautiful and complex simon is and how he is the base of everyone around him

"Are you mad at me?" and Honesty

inspired by the awesome parallel @impossibleknots found between these two shots

and these tags by @darktwistedgenderplural I'd like to talk about this

For both of them, this line comes after a breaking point, when they realize that they just can't stay away from each other for any longer.

Wilhelm, after rejecting Simon out of some misplaced sense of duty and swallowing down his grief about it, literally breaks down on the football field and, fuelled by alcohol and drugs, for once manages to let his guard down.

"You think you know me, eh? You don't!", he yells, followed by "That's right, I do whatever I want!". And then, well, he does what he wants and calls up Simon. And he's finally honest with him. Granted, it's very much the drugs that help him let his guard down, but - in an effort to be less fake than everything that surrounds him - he tells Simon that he likes him. That's one of Wilhelm's first and most authentic verbal declarations of what he feels. And from then on, at least for now and at least in front of Simon, the floodgates are open and he's baring his soul: "Thank you for coming", "You're so beautiful", all his little love declarations, and then he's letting him in on his insecurities as well. "Are you mad at me?" and, after once again declaring that he's so glad Simon is here, "I don't want you to be mad".

It's one of those things he hasn't been allowed to voice or even show, we know this. When he's nervously biting his thumb in s1e1 his mother slaps away his hand, lest he be seen behaving unprincely, and he's thoroughly internalized keeping up the facade, like when we hear him blatantly lie to Simon about being happy to be at Hillerska. Everything and everyone being fake, that includes him, Wilhelm. (And we know that his journey in deconstructing this fakeness is only starting out)

But at least for the time being, he's able to stand by his feelings for Simon. He does still need his assurance that "it's okay" once he's confronted about his love declaration, but he still does admit to it. And that honesty is what leads to them making love for the first time.

Letting their guard down, fully committing to what they're feeling for each other. Honesty is what leads to this.

The second time, it's Simon's turn to bare his soul. Yes, Simon has been the one that has helped Wilhelm be more honest and more vocal about his own feelings, but Simon himself, while forthcoming about his love and the fact that he wants to be with Wilhelm, is still struggling himself, especially when it comes to voicing his not so pleasant feelings, like how heartbroken he's feeling for all of s2.

Even during their 'exchange' in class, it's still only about him slowly starting to see Wilhelm's side, and not about the uncomfortable and conflicting things Simon himself is feeling on the inside.

So when he worriedly texts Wilhelm "Are you mad at me?", that's him admitting that, yes, he's also very much still invested in this, in them and that that's scary, unnerving and that he's not sure how to read the situation. He's letting his insecurity show, something he very, very rarely does. Beautifully, he does it again later, now face to face with Wilhelm. After Wilhelm says that he's scared, Simon admits it, too, letting down his walls for Wilhelm to see that he's not as tough as he pretends to be AND he lets Wilhelm be the one to comfort him, reach out his hand and take him ino his arms.

So in one instance, we have Wilhelm finally letting his true feelings show, proving to Simon - who's been open about his attraction - that the feeling is mutual. And in the other we have Simon, who up until now has been trying to keep his conflicting feelings under wraps and his fear hidden, reassured and coaxed into admitting to them by Wilhelm openly saying that he also is scared and physically showing that he's there for him. Mutual honesty.

Two very different admissions and two very different subjects that they now finally managed to be honest about and every single time it brings them closer and, in both scenes, it repairs the trust that was broken by dishonesty before.

And what makes it even more beautiful to me is that, in addition to it being in a way a new beginning every single time, we know that both instances did have a lasting impact on both of them and their journey towards being more honest with each other. Yes, there are ups and downs and Wilhelm did lie to the world about the video after their first time, but he keeps on learning and the second time around, he is much more honest about his love for Simon. And we even see it bleed into the last episode with Simon now finally admitting to just how much he feels for Wilhelm and Wilhelm in turn finally taking back his initial lie in front of the whole world.

Their journey towards full honesty is still very rocky, but with every instance of them letting down their guards together, they grow closer and their ability to be authentically themselves not only together but also towards the world vastly improves.

One of the things i love the most about young royals's characters is how imperfect they are, not only because of their circumstances but because they actually believe they're right, they're not perfect in ANY WAY.

Any of them could become a villain, they all have anti-hero traits just like in real life, Lisa has never been afraid of showing the darkest side of each character, even the protagonist, she doesn't mind showing the most selfish side of wille, risking him to be disliked by people, the key is how she makes the viewer empathize with him by showing exactly that, the raw side of his personality and life, making us root for him but also making us question ourselves when he does something that's clearly morally wrong: "does his circumstances excuse this behavior?" and i think that's just so incredibly genius

It's not Simon or the monarchy, its simon or his family

I feel like people don't really understand, including Simon (no hate to you babygirl), but the Monarchy is Willie's family. Yes they may not be good but they are his family.

It isn't a choice between Simon and the Crown, but between Simon and his family, their legacy, his brother.

I think when Simon thinks and talks about the Monarchy, he see the oppression, the system, the class divide, not having the choice to vote in that elected leader etc.

Wilhelm sees his family. He cannot separate the monarchy from his family, because his own mother can't. He doesn't really see Simon attacking a horrible outdated system, but his mother, his brother and himself.

Wilhelm is faced with so much burden, being judged from those who don't know him and facing criticism no matter what he does.

What Simon experiences this season, being micromanaged and having those who don't know him judge him, is exactly what Wilhelm has experienced everyday of his life. However Simon also does not have the protection Wilhelm has, leading to having bricks thrown into his window, and making him an easier target. He is even more of a target due to his social status, race, class etc. Simon however also has more of a support system. Friends and family he can turn to in this situation. (Both characters are valid for what they have experienced and I am in no way trying to dismiss Simons pain)

I just don't like when people hate on by boy Wilhelm, like he isn't perfect but also a product of how he was raised. He is a 16 (now 17) boy who has been placed with a burden of legacy on his shoulders, while also battling anxiety, depression, greif. He is still figuring out who he is.

Something I really appreciated about season 2 was how they talked about the statement. In season 1, the focus lies mainly on Wilhelm's betrayal and how deeply that affected Simon. Which was understandable, we can’t blame him for feeling hurt by that and then act accordingly to prioritise himself.

The issue here though is that it made the situation seem very black or white. That it somehow was a choice between authenticity or image. But during multiple conversations throughout season 2, they bring up more of Wilhelm’s perspective. The complexity of the situation, to make it more of, if not a sympathetic choice, at least an understandable one. Particularly in the conversations with Nils, where he talks about how they are “from different worlds” and how Wilhelm’s position makes it not safe for him to come out. 

I think it was a great move to show that Simon wasn’t 100% right in his initial decision either. In the conversations (or arguments) between Wilhelm and Simon it’s made clear that Nils is correct, Simon does struggle to understand Wilhelm’s perspective. Simon chooses to stand firm by his principles and that gives Wilhelm a chance to fight back and call him out for being hypocritical. I think this is where they truly realise how complicated the situation really is. 

But it’s those arguments that opens them up for self reflection. So by the time they are willing to talk and eventually compromise, they’re learning to prioritise each other. It’s this build up and that makes the ending so powerful. They finally meet each other halfway. Simon agrees to be a secret and Wilhelm comes clean about the video.

Their final decisions are made from love, not obligation or principle.

Think about how in episode 2, when Wille is going off on August about August talking to Simon, and August’s response is “You’re not King yet”

It’s telling about August’s relationship to power that he doesn’t think people in general have the power to draw boundaries like: Hey person that posted my underage sex tape that I didn’t consent too - don’t talk to my boyfriend whose privacy and sexuality you also violated.

No the only person with the power to decide what August can and can’t do is the monarch

Also thinking about King August ten or twenty years down the line discovering just how little actual meaningful power the monarch has

I literally can’t stop thinking about Young Royals S3

I have always been fascinated by Wille’s relationship with his parents, or lack thereof. Specifically his mother, because until this season, his father was little more than a cardboard cutout. In S1 I strongly disliked Kristina. In S2 she seemed to be trying a little more, though her efforts were specifically aimed at achieving her own goals for Wilhelm, not his. In S3, I once again dislike her, but I feel bad for disliking her.

Because truly, her grief, the extreme psychological and physical manifestations of losing a child that she is experiencing, is all completely valid, and within the spectrum of what is expected of a parent who has lost a child. I feel sympathy for the physical and mental health problems she is experiencing, and I think it’s OK for her to be experiencing it, to take a step back to deal with it. 

What I don’t think is OK, however, is expecting her 16 year old son, a first year HS student with his own history of mental illness, who is also deeply grieving, to take over all of her responsibilities. Yeah, they don’t really mean for him to take over everything, because he’s a kid and still in school, but they’ve also really stepped up the pressure on him without offering much additional support (Farima offers some, she’s the most present adult in his life this season, and really the one who seems to know him and care about him most of the adults on the show). They ask him to start a foundation and support a cause, but neither of his parents show up to support him in doing that, even knowing that he has sometimes extreme anxiety regarding public speaking/public appearances. They don’t walk him through the process or offer guidance, just constantly remind him that he’s expected to step up, and may have to fully take over within a year or two, and send Farima to deal with him (which in my opinion is much better that Jan Olof, because Farima actually seems patient with Wilhelm and to know how to handle his emotions with sensitivity). 

While I’m mad at Kristina, despite her legitimate grief, I’m more mad at Ludvig, I think. Yes, he also lost a child and is grieving, but he’s holding it together enough to support his wife, so why isn’t he offering any of that support to his son, even when said son starts reaching out more, and clearly wants to talk? 

I also think this is all complicated by the fact that Wilhelm didn’t have a good, close relationship with his parents to begin with. Kristina was harsh and dismissive of him even before Erik died in season 1. If Kristina had only started neglecting Wilhelm, putting excessive pressure on him and comparing him to Erik after Erik had passed, I would be a lot more forgiving. But I get the impression that Wilhelm has always been compared to Erik, has always been made to feel that he isn’t good enough in comparison and needs to be more like Erik, and his parents have never made much effort to understand him. I think he often only got attention when he was in trouble, and toddlers and teenagers are similar in the fact that if their negative behaviors are what get the attention the desire, they will keep doing that as long as it is reinforced that negative behavior leads to attention. His outburst at them in episode 5 had been building a lot longer than the few months since Erik died. 

I think his parents both desperately needed to hear what he was shouting out them. I think that shouting and getting angry and destroying things wasn’t the best way to go about getting them to listen, but as discussed above, I think it’s the only way he really knows how to get their attention. And yeah, the timing isn’t great, when his mother is suffering so much, but Wille is suffering, too, and he has reached his limit. It seems like a relatively little thing, to get mad that his parents talked too much about Erik on a day that’s supposed to be about Wilhelm and that his mom didn’t feel up to sticking around for cake, but that was really just the final straw on a long history of trauma, turmoil, and emotional neglect, the last Jenga block being pulled out before the tower toppled. 

(Admittedly, this is young royals, it’s a show about Wilhelm, and we viewers have come to love him over the 3 seasons, it’s his struggle that is being portrayed, so of course I’m on his side and want better for him rather than siding with his mother even though I do feel some sympathy for her.)

Anyway, I will probably keep reflecting on this aspect of the show for a lot longer. Maybe I’ll even feel some inspiration to write fan fiction in response. We’ll see where it goes. 

I also have a lot more thoughts about August, and about Farima of all people to share at some point.

interesting how wille's initiation into hillerska composed of him being dragged away from the safety of his room kicking and screaming, tied to a statue, gagged, and hazed, while sara had significantly more fun, was able to laugh and talk, took pictures, and actively cooperated with the girls to pass her initiation.

with hillerska being a metaphor for status and influence, wille was born into the life and had pressure and expectations shoved on him. he didn't have a say in most of the decisions surrounding his life, and he was the one humiliated by august, who organized the initiation as well. sara on the other hand, is desperate to fit in, and she does anything and everything she can to get a spot with the rest of the school, whether that means keeping august's secrets or setting fire to a flag.

also the fact that both initiations were seen as tradition and normal, but while wille was an unwilling participant, sara went along with her test despite felice assuring her she didn't have to. it represents their arcs this season - wille tries to break away from the traditions trapping him, and sara gets into a relationship with august even though he's a complete fucking asshole who she didn't have to be involved with any more than necessary.

I find it very funny how the entire fandom is dissecting Simon's problematic behaviors just because he tried to have a fling with Marcus to move on from his heartbreak. It's all these discussions about how he is flawed, or his character was reduced to being a love interest or how toxic his actions were, JUST BECAUSE HE TRIED TO HAVE A REBOUND.

Like guys are we forgetting that Wilhelm LITERALLY threatened August with a gun and said Royal Court woul help him to cover it? I mean I know August is awful but you know what is more of a problematic behavior than having a rebound, making your ex jealous (which he didn't), sort of cheating (was it cheating tho) ? Attempted murder.

That's right, as much as I love Wille he did try to kill someone. Simon and Wilhelm both are flawed due to the trauma they faced. That's what makes their characters so good and the writing and story even better. How about we accept both of their flaws and move on?

Episode 1: Part 1/?

Re-watching Young Royals again because… well, I’m not gonna pretend I need a reason to anymore. 

 Some of my thoughts on introduction of Wilhelm and Simon as characters. 

I find it interesting how we hear the name “Prince Wilhelm” even before we see the person behind the name. Even more interesting that the first word we hear in the entire show is “Prince.” Really hammers down the point that for an outsider he is first a title, and then may be if you have the patience to care, a person.

Now on the contrast, we don’t learn Simon’s name until way after we see him. We hear him sing (beautifully), we see him be bold, be happy, we hear about him being confident when he first came to school, we learn that he is non-boarder, that he is probably from a working class family, and then we learn his name. Also, we learn it directly from him, unlike Wilhelm. 

I think this is also why Wilhelm introducing himself to Simon at lunch really speaks to me. Because he is not just making conversation, he is saying, “Hey I see that you already judged me as prince. But I am also a person, that actually happen to agree with your views, so I want to get to know you more and I want you to know me for me. Let’s start again on an even ground. I am Wilhelm.” (The boy is also already in love, but that’s another discussion entirely, lol). 

Sometimes I look outside my scope of mutuals and I'm like.....I'm glad I'm not them (whole essay in the tags)

AND WHAT IF I TELL YOU IVE BEEN CRYING AS I TYPE MY MICKEY CHARACTER STUDY OVER THE FUCKING SCENE AT THE BORDER HUH!??? I am a mess, writing pov Mickey for this hasn't even gotten me emotional BUT THE SONG I WAS LISTENING TO WHILE WRITING THIS PART WAS NOT HELPING GOD SOMEONE GIVE 7x11 MICKEY A HUG (and Ian too) BUT MICKEY GODDAMNIT...

I’m in the middle of writing a long ass Danny Phantom fanfic and it’s kinda crazy bc for one I haven’t written a fanfic in almost 7 years, and for two I entered this fandom when I was literally TWELVE how am I still into it…my brain doesn’t get rid of fixations so easily I guess